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wasitforrevenge · 9 months ago

Text

oh sweetheart pt 3

pairing: boxer!ellie x f! jesses sister!reader

word count: 5.4k!!! longest part yet yay

rating: 18+ (smut will be coming in later parts)

warnings: dealer! boxer!ellie, weed, alcohol, boxing, kissing, joel is dead in this, talk of abusive relationship, smoking, they’re drunk but eveything is consensual ofc! lmk if im missing anything

summary: you and ellie share a moment and both of you admit it :)

author notes: hi everyone thank you for all the love on this series <<<333 this is a good one! not all the way edited yet but i wanted to post cause i finished it 20 minutes ago! sorry for the wait but i think maybe some smut in the near future ;) requests are open and id love any feedback. thank you for 200 followers and over almost 2000 likes!! this is unbelievable and im so grateful! pls let me know if u want to be added to the taglist!!!

part 3 | part 4

series masterlist | main masterlist

from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸

READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.

DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.

finally friday is here, it feels like you’ve been counting the minutes until you see her again. you woke up around eleven am and put water in the kettle to make yourself some tea as you went to the bathroom to get your morning routine done, paramore playing over your speaker in the bathroom. your routine is something you’ve started to build since you moved to try and keep your anxiety at bay, not all the time it works but its a good way to get your day started. you started with washing your face, brushing your teeth, then brushing the bedhead out of the mess you call hair.

a couple minutes later, you hear the kettle hiss and you make your way back to the kitchen and turn off the stove. you picked your favorite mug out of your cabinet and make your tea. leaving the kitchen, you went back to sit on the couch and think about a million different outcomes that would possibly happen tonight when you see her. you wonder if you’re reading too much into the way she talked to you, was she even flirting with you at all? or just being nice? did she just feel bad about seeing what happened outside her gym?

your phone buzzed in the mist of your thoughts on your and you read a text from dina telling you they’re leaving for the gym around 7 and if you wanted a ride. before responding you pulled up the weather app on your phone and decided you could walk there, its a warm summer day out again and by the time the sun fell, it would be cool enough to walk and it was only about 15 minutes from your house, that and leaving open the possibility that she would want to drive you home again.

you texted her back saying that you would just meet them there. you looked at the time seeing its about eleven thirty so you still have a while until you have to leave. you decided you were gonna be productive today. you did laundry and washed your sheets, did the dishes, vacuumed, cleaned the bathroom and made a sandwich for lunch even thought by now it was 4 o clock. as you were walking around your apartment, you made a mental note to try and find some nice thrift stores around to help you decorate your place. you made your way to your bathroom to shower for tonight.

you love taking long showers, its your guilty pleasure. thanking god that your landlord pays your water bill as you dried off from the shower, put on your strawberry lotion, a big black t-shirt and fuzzy socks to hang around in while you did your hair and minimal makeup. you couldn’t stop thinking about seeing her tonight. new girl was playing on the tv in your room as you finished the final touches on your face. doing light everything since its hot but still wanting to look nice for the occasion: finally seeing her again.

four episodes later and its 6 o clock so you change into a pair of black levi shorts and a green top. your hair and makeup still looked good from earlier so nothing to touch up but you still triple checked yourself. you wish you could have smoked today to help beat the nerves but you wouldn’t have anything until tonight, smiling to yourself thinking of you and her on the phone both laughing when you asked if she was bribing you. you slipped on your converse, grabbed your bag, and locked the front door behind you and started making your way to ellie’s gym.

you got there around seven and you didn’t see jesses car yet but you did see hers. ellie’s beat up 2000 green honda cry sat in a spot towards the back of the parking lot. memories of you leaning on her window practically admitting you liked when she called you sweetheart and the peaceful feeling of comfortable silence you both held.

you heard someone call your name in the distance to turn and see dina getting out of the car, you were so concentrated on ellies car you didn’t even see them pull in. you made your way over and greeted them with a hug as dina wrapped your arm in hers and dragged you in with her, jesse following behind. you tried to calm your nerves but it just wasn’t working. not nervous about being here, even after what happened outside with the man last time, but of seeing her again. you’ve only spoken to her a handful of times but you thought of her more times than you can count.

as soon as you made it closer towards the front door, it was loud, like the first time you were here. loud people, loud lights, loud everything but now knowing it was ellie’s changed it. jesse held the door as dina went in first and you both followed. florescent lights beamed from above you, shining on the sweaty bodies in the gym. it was just like it was the first time you came. your nerves followed you everywhere, but it was worth seeing her again.

you went in and dina guided you guys to the same table you had last time. you wonder if they sit here every time. you looked around for ellie but you didn’t see her anywhere. you saw her car so she has to be here.

dina and jesse got up to go get drinks from the makeshift bar while you sat and waited for them to bring back your drink. you looked over to them waiting their turn when you heard something behind you.

“hey sweetheart,” she whispered close to your ear, and before you could respond she pulled out the the seat next to you and sat down.

“hey ellie,” you said almost startled. she was wearing a pair of skinny jeans, a black t shirt and all her tattoos were showing this time. it was almost mind blowing seeing her and you couldn’t even explain what it did to you. you don’t understand why a girl you barely know has this effect on you.

“i told you to call me el,” she said and laughed kindly towards you, “i have the stuff for you” she finished.

“oh thank you, i’d hope so considering that’s the reason i came,” you joked.

“wait you mean you didn’t come to see me?” she said sounding fake hurt.

“that was just a plus,” you flirted. dina and jesse came back to the table with the drinks before she responded to you and they both greeted ellie as they sat.

“hey els we didn’t see you before we ordered the drinks, i can go get one for ya?” jesse asked her.

“nah i’ll wait til the next round, thanks though” she told him. she smiled at you and the conversation started between all four of you, before you knew it an hour and a half passed, you had more three more rounds and just enjoyed your friday night. the match started and you find it so convenient that you can still see the ring from where the table is so theres no need to get up and watch considering its not ellie up there.

you watched for a bit until it was coming to the end, cheering erupted and ellie told dina and jesse that she was going out for a smoke, before she got up, she leaned over to you and whispered “you coming sweetheart?” softly in your ear, her face inches away from yours, then she moved back and smiled. she held out her hand and you held it as she pulled you up with her as you blushed so hard, you swear you turned into a tomato.

your eyes stayed on her hand holding yours and the beautiful moth tattoo covering her arm, not believing that she’s actually touching you again. you followed behind her as she moved with you through the gym towards the door, as you walked out still hand in hand you saw the side of the building, it was the same place she defended you the first time you met her.

she lead you over to a bench that you never even realized was there. your hands broke as you both sat, she went pull out her cigarette pack and the lighter from her back pocket when she noticed you were staring at her still. she smirked as she opened the pack, and surprisingly pulled out a joint. she put it in her mouth and brought the lighter up to it before telling you “its not polite to stare sweetheart.”

you blushed and looked away as soon as she said it. she laughed and she passed the joint to you, you told her you just couldn’t help it. and you really couldn’t, she’s breathtaking. the way her freckles danced across her whole face, her eyes had a small tint of brown circling her iris, the scar on her right eyebrow, the way her lips just sat perfectly on her face. you so badly want to reach out and touch them again.

you hit it a couple times, you are sure your cheeks haven’t been back to normal since you saw her and you wonder if she’s noticed. you passed her back the joint and she staring at you taking in every detail of you too as she brought it to her mouth and took a hit. blowing out the smoke she smirked, and said “i can’t either sweetheart.”

she leaned back against the bench, legs spread a little as she handed you the joint and asked, “so what brought you here besides jesse?” she acquired. you told her about living in brooklyn, above the cafe you worked and how your time spent there wasn’t totally great but the real reason was running from a shitty past, you weren’t ready to tell her specifics but you told her that’s why you left, you had to get away from what happened there but it was more like who. she told you she understood and then she told you “well i’m glad you’ve made your way here sweetheart.”

you don’t know if it was the alcohol or weed but you sat outside on the bench for another 20 minutes, smoking and laughing as you talked about so much: you talked about the tv shows you’re both watching, the albums you had on repeat, the guilty pleasures you both had and what you both did in your free time. you spoke to one another like you’ve known each other for years. it just feels so good to talk to someone like this again.

she learned that your parents live in portland, so moving coasts was a big deal but you felt like you were on auto-pilot growing up and you knew you had to get out when you could, she learned that you dropped out of college two years and haven’t made any plans to go back but you would like to. you told her a couple funny stories about you and jesse growing up and she laughed at them all.

you found out that she plays guitar and that she spends time drawing and journaling. you learn that ellie was adopted when she was 14, she grew up in boston, and she has an older sister named sarah but that she doesn’t come around much anymore since she gotten married. she told you that her dad passed away from a heart attack about a year ago and since then, her and her uncle tommy.

“im sorry to hear about your dad els” you sympathized.

“its okay sweetheart, just fucking sucks sometimes.” she responded softly as she put the joint out next to her and slipped it back in her cigarette pack. instead this time she pulled out a cigarette and lit that this time. she slid it in her pocket before she stood up off the bench, offering you her hand again and said you should probably head back inside.

you grabbed her warm hand and stood up to follow her, you started the walk towards the side door but before she opened it, she turned around to you and faced you.

“hey sweetheart?” she asked.

“yes els?” you waited for her to continue, her hand still covering yours.

“im glad you came sweetheart, this was nice, i mean as nice as it gets sitting on the side of this place,” she laughed softly, you felt like she was closer than ever but maybe because you just wanted her to be, “you know, id love to do this again.. and maybe play you something on my guitar.. if you want.” she said almost nervously, feeling the urge to look away from you.

“i would love that els.” you said, looking up from staring at your hands together to smiling in her face. you cant believe she asked you, part of you prayed she would, you knew there was a connection here. she realized it too. your eye contact never faded as you stood here.

“great, im looking forward to it more than you know,” she told you sweetly. she let go out hand and you felt slight disappoint in your heart as you assumed she was going to turn around and open the door and this moment would be over. instead, she brought her hand up to your face and let it rest on your cheek as she brushed her thumb over it. the touch of her warm hand sent sparks through your body this time and you couldn’t be bothered moving as she grew closer to you.

“you have no idea how much i wanna kiss you right now.” she whispered, from only what felt like two inches away from your lips. fuck, you thought silently. she was so close to you, you could feel her breathe as she spoke.

“please do it.” you practically whined, you couldn’t take this anymore. all you wanted to do was feel her lips on yours. after you spoke, you felt her thumb move from your cheek to brushing your lips softly. the drinks you had definitely brought out your confident and the want you had for her.

“oh sweetheart,” she purred towards you, “how badly i want to but it has to be more special than this.” she said moving her thumb back to your red cheek.

“just as long as it happens el,” you responded, breathing heavier as your nerves grew in anticipation.

she nodded as she slowly moved her hand off your face and brought it down to your hip and gave it a squeeze, still smiling at you as she reached to open the door and let you through in front of her.

you walk back into the gym and went to find jesse and dina. you saw jesse at the bar and ellie went over to him, telling you she was getting more drinks. you went over to dina at the table and took a seat next to her. you asked her how the match went and she told you same as always and nothing crazy this time.

“you guys were out there for a while, whats up with that?” dina asked while smirking and wiggling her eyebrows at you.

“dina…” you laughed, “we just smoked and talked for a bit.” you replied to her.

“sureeee that’s all, we see the way you look at her!”, she squealed, “and the way she looks at you, it just seems pretty obvious.”

you laughed and told her that nothing happened yet but you did admit to her that you wanted it to.

“stop we knew it!” she laughed loudly and hit the table in excitement. you pulled your hands to your face that was full of embarrassment.

“what do you mean you knew it, was it obvious?” you gasped. your eyes darting towards ellie at the makeshift bar.

“to me and jesse yes.” she told you still smiling over the fact that her two friends maybe starting something new soon.

as you went to reply, the drinks were on the table, jesse and ellie were back already at the table pulling their chairs. the conversation between you and dina came to a halt as you all started talking. you all sat, conversing and finished your last round by the time it hit around 11 pm. you were getting tired and you were definitely drunk after all the rounds of drinks everyone bought. the matches ended an hour ago and you guys were the last few people left besides the lady behind the bar and a couple stragglers paying their tab and chatting.

“hey i think me and d are gonna head out,” he said looking over to dina, who was definitely feeling all the drinks she had, he laughed and said, “this one needs to make it home into bed. can you make it home okay? i can take you now if you need” he asked talking to you.

“no i’m gonna take her home.” ellie cut in before you could respond. you looked at her and smiled as jesse told you to text when you both got home safe. he helped dina up and they made their way to the door. your eyes followed til they left and then you turned to ellie, who was already staring at you.

“that okay sweetheart? that i take you home again?” she asked smirking towards you.

“yeah els, that’s okay.” you blushed as she stood up and put her hand out for the third time tonight. you connected your hands again. touching her had your skin was burning up. you followed her into a back office. paperwork, receipts, and random things littered the room. as you looked around and saw a decent couch, a safe in the corner and a coffee area on a little table and a large desk with folders and boxes of things you didn’t know.

you watched as ellie disconnected your hands to go over to pick up her backpack from the side of the couch and then she grabbed a jacket she had hanging over the deck of the chair to the desk, she slid it over her shoulders then grabbed a piece of paper, writing something non legible from where you were standing. she smiled when she turned towards you and held her arm out motioning to the door for you guys to exit.

the stragglers were gone and the bartender bid ellie goodnight as she walked out the front door. you walked the distance of the gym and made it to the door with ellie, she leaned over and turned the lights off and then held the door opened for you.

you told her thank you and she nodded towards you, “i think we should walk, it’s not far from your apartment.” she spoke looking towards you for confirmation as she turned and locked up the gym for the night.

“that’s okay but how are you going to get home without your car?” you asked. you didn’t want her walking home alone either, you knew she could handle herself but still, the thought made you worry.

“i’m only 5 minutes away from you actually so its not far, ill be back for my car tomorrow.” she told you. you nodded and both of you continued to walk the sidewalk in a comfortable silence next to each other. you glanced up at the sky, noticing the stars and the way the moon beamed over the city. it was so much cooler now than it was earlier and you moved to brush over the goosebumps that covered your arms. ellie noticed your movement and took off her jacket. you turned when you noticed what she was going and told her, “no its okay we’ll be there soon i don’t need it.”

“sorry sweetheart, got to make sure you stay warm.” she smirked as she put it over your shoulders and watched as you put your arms in. you smiled to her as you readjusted it and continued the walk to your place. the smell of her engulfed you and you’ve never felt so comfortable.

“its so beautiful.” you whispered, “and quiet, new york was never like this. they don’t lie when they say the city never sleeps ya know?” you finished.

the city you moved to that you wish you could escape from. the shitty and abusive relationship you wish you could leave behind. the things you tried the most to forget. you never spoke about it, you just ran. the city you wished had better memories connected with it. but now all you want is to create new memories.

when you moved across the country, you told yourself that you’re not getting into anything here because you know you need to heal from the those years of abuse and insecurity so the last thing you expected was to meet ellie and end up feeling this way about her. you don’t want this to happen and you ruin it because you aren’t okay but with her, you feel like you could be okay one day.

“i could only imagine, boston was a busy place too but not the same, it always is quiet here.” she chuckled softly.

“i love it, things finally seem calm now.” you smiled as you looked her. she took in the sight of you in her jacket and she loved it. she can only imagine seeing you wear her t shirts… or nothing at all. she shook the thoughts from her head but she just couldn’t help it. you were the most beautiful girl she’d ever seen. you were breathtaking. she couldn’t believe she’d met someone like you in this shitty small town.

the town where her dad and her moved, and the memories of them together haunted her. now that he was gone, she knew a piece of her was missing. things were incomplete without him. he was all she thought about, the guilt of what happened and how she couldn’t do anything to stop it.

the only time ellie wasn’t thinking about joel was when she was thinking about you, she was grateful that she met you. she didn’t know what this was going to turn into but she hoped it would be something. she sees the effects she has on you and she wishes she really knew how to communicate with you that she feels the same way about you.

you continued the walk in a comfortable silence, both of you wrapped in your thoughts of each another and eventually made it to the front of your building. you turned to face her with a smile,“here i am,” you spoke softly to her, not wanting the night to come to an end.

“here you are, thank you for letting me take you home sweetheart, call it peace of mind,” she admitted.

“thank you for walking me els… do you want to come up?” you said without a thought. you didn’t know if this is was the alcohol talking but you know you didn’t regret it when you said it and you wish that’s what you could blame it on but you knew you wanted this even sober.

“if you want me to sweetheart” she smirked as she responded.

you stepped closer to her as you looked at her, only a couple inches away from her face, watching her eyes move from your eyes to your lips. you knew you both could feel the tension.

“please just say yes.” you sighed wishing you could feel her lips on yours already.

“okay sweetheart, lets go.” she pulled away but connected your hands and it took you a second to recognize that she agreed. you turned around, suddenly nervous about the fact that she’s going to see where you spend your days. you opened the door to the lobby, and ellie held the door as you both walked in. she followed you up the stairs by the front, and you made your way to the front door as you held ellie’s hand in one and used the other to pull your keys from your bag.

you unlocked the door and you brought ellie in with you before the door was shut and you were locking it. you took off her jacket and put it on your coat rack and turned to look at her.

“okay it’s kind of a mess so i’m sorry but-“ you started before she cut you off.

“sweetheart, your place is practically spotless, you should see mine.” ellie laughed.

you laughed as you pulled ellie over to the green couch that took up a lot of your living room but it was a dream purchase and you loved it. you told ellie to take a seat as you walked over to the kitchen and grabbed some water for you both. as you were walking back towards her, she was digging around in her backpack. as you placed the waters down and took a seat, she pulled out weed in a jar and handed it to you.

“here this is yours.” she said.

“oh thank you! i totally forgot, do you want to smoke now- fuck i don’t think i have anything to roll with.” you told her as you went to open the windows in your living room.

instead of saying anything, she reached back into her backpack and pulled out a jar of already rolled joints.

“i came prepared.” she laughed, “and you won’t owe me anything for that.” she said, motioning to the stuff she gave you as her hands were cracking open the jar of pre-rolls.

“ellie- no i’ll give you the cash,” but she shook her head no and brought the lighter to the joint between her lips.

“no, it’s on me, don’t worry about it.” she responded as she took a hit.

“do you give other people weed for free?” you asked, looking at her as she was smoking while sitting next to you on the couch. you wish you could stay like this forever.

“only pretty girls that i like…” she said sweetly as you held eye contact as she handed you the joint.

“oh so you think i’m pretty?” you teased her as you took a hit.

“sweetheart, i think you’re the prettiest girl i’ve ever seen.” she told you. you instantly blush and look away from her, trying not to choke on the smoke you held in your lungs.

“thank you els, i think you’re beautiful.” you said to her. when you looked up, you saw her cheeks tint lightly as she grabbed the joint you held out to her.

“thanks sweetheart.” she said as she put the joint down on a cup at the table you’d been using as an ashtray and she brought her hand up and held your cheek like she did earlier. you couldn’t help yourself as you nuzzled your face into her warm hand. your eye contact only made the tension in the room worse.

“you really are beautiful… sweetheart, can i?” she asked as she looked down at your lips. you nodded and as she came closer, your lips just barely brushing, as she asked, “i need to hear you pretty girl.”

“yes please els- please just kiss me already.” you begged.

her lips were on yours before you could even realized this was actually happening. your lips moved slow together at first but you couldn’t help yourself from deepening the kiss as ellie brought her other hand up and tangled it in your hair as you moaned, her tongue slipped into your mouth, both of you tasting the weed and alcohol you consumed.

one of your hand rested against her chest and the other gripping her arm as you melted into the kiss. both ellie’s hands were in your hair now as your tongues continued to fight for dominance but you let her win and moaned again and she swallowed it as she kissed you.

ellie pulled your leg over her lap so you straddled her, never breaking your lips apart. your lips continued to move in sync as you grinded against her. her hands on your hips moving with you. your lips stay connected until you broke the kiss to come up for air and rested your forehead on hers.

“you okay sweetheart?” ellie panted as she caught her breath too.

“yes els just need a second.” you said as your eyes stayed shut while you tried to control your breathing. you couldn’t believe that you guys finally kissed. the tension was killing you both and now it’s finally happened.

“hey it’s okay, take your time sweetheart.” ellie said as she rubbed a hand along your thigh at a comfortable pace, brushing the cloth from your shorts as she moved it. she brought the other one up to your cheek and lifted your head to look at you. you looked tired and ellie didn’t want to take full advantage of you after you guys had been drinking and smoking all night.

“hey sweetheart, lets get you to bed, we’ll finish this another time i promise.” she said sweetly as you mumbled an “okay els thank you,” and moved off her lap to sit back on the couch. ellie stood up and offered her hand. you stood up and walked both of you to your bedroom.

you moved to sit on the edge of your king sized bed and ellie stood in front of you still holding your hand as you asked her if she wanted to stay the night because it was late and you didn’t want her walking home.

“sure sweetheart i’ll sleep on the couch, and only for your peace of mind.” she chuckled, thinking back to the conversation earlier.

“els we can share the bed, it’s okay, i’ll keep my hands to myself.” you joked and she laughed.

“i don’t think i’d be complaining if you couldn’t but i’m okay on the couch.” ellie insisted.

“els please just lay with me.” you said looking up at her as she moved her hand to rest on your cheek again.

“okay sweetheart.” she finally agreed.

you smiled up at her and you took ellie’s hand from your face and guided her into the bathroom connected to your room. she watched as you bent down and opened the sink cabinet and grabbed a toothbrush. you turned around and handed it to her with a smile. you guys brushed your teeth and then went back into your bedroom.

ellie stood here as you moved across the room to your dresser, and pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of shorts from your drawer and handed them over to ellie. she told you thank you and you smiled at her. ellie walked into the bathroom to change and you walked back to the dresser. you stripped yourself of your shirt and bra before throwing on a different oversized tee and changing your underwear. you didn’t even realize you were soaked after what happened on the couch.

ellie watched you as she leaned against the bathroom door frame as you untangled the sides of your underwear after you pulled them up.

“you’re perfect”, she thought in head before speaking out loud. “thanks sweetheart.” you turned around when ellie spoke, sending her a smile before you moved to your side of the bed, you grabbed the duvet and moved it so you both were able to get in your bed.

you and ellie laid facing each other in a comfortable silence as you were both growing incredibly tired. you felt your eyes starting to get heavy and felt ellie’s hand brush your hair back from your face so you kept your eyes open to look at her.

“el?” you whispered.

“yes sweetheart?” she spoke quietly back to you.

“i really like you… i don’t know if this is too early but it just feels right.”

“i feel it too sweetheart, i like you too so don’t worry,” ellie said softly, hand still holding your face, “now get some sleep, we’ll talk more in the morning pretty girl.”

“goodnight els.” you whispered.

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twirlyleafs · 9 days ago

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“Priorities”

Carlos Sainz x Reader

Tw: nothing I think, some angst.

~~~~

It was late afternoon by the time Carlos had wrapped up his meetings, finally parking the car outside your shared apartment. Despite his tiredness he couldn’t help the small smile on his face, excited to finally come home and looking forward to unwind together with you. His mind was filled with thoughts of food, maybe you should cook together? Or order in from that little Italian place you loved so much? He thought of what to watch on tv, knowing at the same time that it didn’t matter much to him. Hed probably fall asleep with his head in your lap within a few minutes of you sinking down in the couch together. As he unlocked the door he call out a soft hello, expecting you to pop out from somewhere like you usually did and come greet him with a kiss. When you didn’t, the silence of the apartment made him almost uneasy. Carlos called out for you again, frowning when he didn’t get an answer. Confused he pulled his phone from his pocket, thinking he might’ve missed a message from you, but the only one was your short conversation from this morning. He hadn’t heard anything since he told you he was in a meeting and when he thought about it that was kind of wierd. Normally he’d come out of a meeting to at least one text from you, and probably a cute picture of something you’d seen or something you’d cooked. You liked to keep him updated and he loved getting updates. He frowned, pressing the button to call you. The frown only deepened when he was forced to listen to the singlas until it eventually went to voicemail. Maybe you were at the gym? Or in the store, or out with friends? You usually picked up when he called though. Sighing Carlos moved further into the apartment, sinking down in the couch with a deep breath. Lazily scrolling through his phone it took him a few minutes until his eyes stopped on a story posted by one of your friends. The scene was cozy, candle-lit table and a tightly squeezed group of people posing for the picture. Right in the center he saw you, eyes crinkling with laughter as you carefully cut up the cake placed infront of you. His heart skipped a beat and as his eyes moved to read the caption it sank all the way down into his stomach.

Happy birthday to the sweetest, kindest and most beautiful soul. Love you!

Your birthday. It’s your birthday today and he’d completely forgotten it. You’d reminded him, several times the past few weeks, and every time he’d promise that he would make it the best day ever. That you and him would spend it together, all day with full focus on you and not a single thought on anything else. He’d promised himself to leave work behind, even just for one day, to really be able to make it special for you and now here he stood imagining your face when you realized he hadn’t kept any of it. Carlos fingers flew over his screen, quickly trying to call you again. When you didn’t answer, he hadn’t expected you to, he typed out a message.

C: Carino I’m so sorry

C: Im sorry, please call me? Or let me come see you?

C: I can pick you up after your dinner and we can do something? Anything you like

C: I love you, I’m sorry

You didn’t respond at first and Carlos began pacing the apartment, the stress and guilt eating him up from inside. He was just about to call one of your friends when your message finally came.

Y: Im out with friends Carlos, it’s fine.

Y: Love you too

He stared at it, a lump in his throat. He hated that you said it was fine, he knows it’s not. He knows what he has done is not fine and he knows you are not feeling fine either. He can see you, surrounded by your friends but also being reminded that he completely fucked you over today. The words its fine didn’t feel right, he could practically feel the disappointment laced beneath them.

C: Please amor, let me make it up to you.

No reply. Carlos kept his phone by his side the whole evening, waiting and constantly checking the screen hoping to find you giving him another chance but the silence dragged on. As the hours ticked by he realized you weren’t letting him off the hook that easily, not that he thought you should, but the panic inside him grew. Today should’ve been about you, about showing you he was capable of putting work aside, proving that despite everything always being about racing you were his priority. He hated that you gave him so much of your time and energy and he just- forgot. When he finally heard the sound of a key in the door he scrambled to his feet and moved out into the hallway, just in time to see you step inside. Your eyes met for the briefest moment before you turned away, expression calm but guarded.

”Hey.” He started, voice soft and overflowing with regret. You offered a quiet greeting, still not meeting his gaze, and he continued. ”Im so so sorry. I forgot, and I know that such a dickmove and I can’t tell you how sorry I am. I have no excuse, I just-”

”It’s fine Carlos.” You nodded, hanging up your coat with slow and steady movements. Your tone of voice betrayed you and Carlos could heard the hurt you tried to hide. ”I know you’re busy. Its fine. I didn’t want to bother you.” The words slipping from your lips had his chest tightening.

”You’re never a bother baby.” His words came out almost as whispers, eyes pleading. ”I- I know I messed up, I should’ve been here. I promise I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” He didn’t miss the way something flashed in your eyes, something hard and cold before your face softened. The sadness in your gaze when you watched him had him want to clutch his chest.

”You don’t have to promise anything Carlos.” The way you spoke was almost resigned. ”It’s fine. I just wish I didn’t feel like I’m something you have to work to fit into your schedule instead of something you actually want there.” The words stung, more than he had expected. Carlos wanted to reach for you, pull you close and tell you how important you were to him. That he’d give up everything else if you asked him to. But he didn’t, instead he just stood there looking into your eyes and realizing you didn’t want to talk to him right now. Carlos stayed still, watching you delicately make your way past him and he felt the weight of the promise that might’ve come a little too late this time.

That night, when Carlos eventually joined you in bed, he could feel the invisible wall between you. He caught himself glancing over, hoping you’d turn to him or shuffle closer like you’d usually do. He wanted nothing more than to have you curled up against his chest, but something in the air stopped him from reaching out. Instead he stared up at the ceiling, your earlier words replaying in his head. You felt like he didn’t want you, like you didn’t matter enough to him to make time for you in his schedule.

The days that followed didn’t seem to get any better. Carlos didn’t know how to approach the subject, didn’t know what to say, and you moved through the apartment like a ghost. You were always polite, always kind, but distant. When he asked if you wanted to join him for coffee or go for a run och a bike ride you’d shake your head while offering a soft smile, telling him you didn’t have time right now. When he tried to bring up the upcoming weekend, a weekend he knew was free for both you and him, and suggested that you’d plan a trip together you once again offered a sweet smile and told him you’d be up for whatever worked best for him. You stopped asking him for things, he noticed, and you never reached out first. When you kissed it was him who leaned in, when you ate together it was his suggestion. You didn’t remind him of plans, didn’t suggest movie nights, didn’t send him those funny little updates on your day when you were apart and he missed it. All of it. You didn’t even utter a word of complain when he was busy, you just let him go and never asked for even a moment of his time. Every time he noticed you step back something inside him twisted.

One evening, after Carlos had spent the day at the training center, he came home to find you sitting on the couch reading. You looked up at him when he entered, offered him a faint smile and a small hello, before turning back to your book. Usually, before all this, you’d be quick to ask him about his day, pull him down to cuddle with you and gently scratch the stress away from his scalp. But now it was as if you almost went out of your way not to talk to him. Carlos couldn’t stand it. It had only been a few days but the tension, the quiet ache of your absence was driving him mad. Taking a deep breath Carlos shuffled over, taking a seat on the coffee table infront of you. You shifted, glancing up at him, but didn’t speak.

”Can we talk?” His voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. You hesitated, you hated that you did, before nodding slowly.

”Of course. What’s on your mind?” The way you answered, so calm and almost indifferent, made him have to swallow the lump in his throat. He took a deep breath, choosing his words carefully.

”It’s not about what’s on my mind, it’s about yours. I, well I can feel you pulling away and I get that it’s my fault, you know? I know it’s because of what happened but I- I don’t know how to fix it. ”

”Carlos,” you murmured, eyes trailing down to your fidgeting fingers. ”It’s fine. I told you, I don’t want to bother you. I know you’re busy, I know you don’t need more stress in your life.” The words hit him like a punch. A bother. He could tell you genuinely believed that, that you saw yourself like someone, something, that bothered him. After everything you’ve been through he’d somehow made you feel like an inconvenience in his life.

”Don’t say that.” His voice was strained as he leaned forward, elbows on knees. ”You’re not a bother. Never. I’m sorry I made you feel like that. I know forgetting your birthday was the dickmove of the century, I really fucked up-”

”It’s not about you forgetting my birthday Carlos.” You shook your head softly, interrupting him. ”Or, well it is but not just that. It’s that sometimes, more recently, it feels like there’s no room for me in your life. Like you’re not willing to make room. I’m here all the time and you come find me when it’s convenient.” Carlos flinched, words cutting through his heart like sharp blades. You were right, he knew you were, but he hadn’t been willing to admit it earlier. He barely was now. You’d always been so kind, so understanding and supportive of his career and his demanding schedule and your support meant the world to him. He hated that he hadn’t showed you that. He hated himself for taking it for granted.

”I know I haven’t been good at- well at balancing things.” As he spoke his voice was thick with regret. ”And I know it’s been a lot recently, but carinõ I never meant to make you feel like, like you’re on the outside. I see you as a part of my life, like the biggest part. You’re what’s important.” Your gaze stayed trained on your hands, expression softening but still guarded.

”That’s nice to hear.” Murmured words had him carefully reach out to wedge his hand between yours and for the first time in days you didn’t pull away. ”I get that you have a lot on your plate and I want to support you I just, I don’t know if I can keep pretending it doesn’t hurt.”

”You shouldn’t. Pretend, I mean.” Silence settled slowly as Carlos tried to gather his thoughts. He held your hand tightly, thumb swiping gently across your knuckles. He knew what he wanted to say, he wanted to throw promises at her and beg her to give him another chance, but he also knew that wouldn’t cut it. Carlos understood that whatever he said now wouldn’t matter until he actually showed you, showed up for you, and he silently promised himself he would. As a single drop hit the back of his hand his eyes quickly trailed back to your face, feeling his chest clench as he watched yet another tear slowly slip down your cheek. With a deep breath he squeezed your hand, leaning closer. ”Can I please hold you?” The question felt weird on his tongue, he’d never asked for permission to touch you before, but it seemed necessary in the situation. When you offered a small nod, sniffing quietly, Carlos didn’t hesitate. In a swift maneuver he was seated next to you in the couch, arms wrapped around your frame as you fell against him. He released a shaky breath when he felt your arms snake around his torso and he pulled you somehow even closer, nose pressed against the top of your head.

”I missed you.” Your voice was barely audible but Carlos could feel the words seep into his skin.

”I missed you too.” He spoke against your hair. ”And I know I will have to show you for you to believe me, but I really am sorry. You deserve a lot more than I’ve given you lately and I promise I’ll be better. I’ll make time, real time, for us. You’re the most important person in my life, you’re my person, and I’m not losing you.” Carlos eyes fluttered open as you slowly pulled away, looking up at him with a mixture of sadness and hope.

”I really hope you mean it.”

”I do.” You held his gaze in silence for what felt like forever until you finally nodded.

”Okay.”

The days went on after that and soon enough days turned into weeks, weeks into months. Carlos had really realized what he had been doing to you, how his neglect had chipped away at the foundation of what you had built together, and he’d been working on it. Really working on it. At first it was awkward, you both thought so. Carlos wasn’t used to scheduling his time around someone else, not in the way you needed or in the way he wanted to offer. He had to force himself to slow down, to prioritize moments with you. He learned to say no, to meeting, to interviews, to unnecessary events because he had realized what it cost him to always say yes. The reward for saying no though, was what really brought him happiness. Every time he chose you, every time he prioritized you over the demands that came with his career, he saw something in your eyes. Relief, hope, love. It hadn’t been easy though, not all of it. There were moments when he still caught you hesitating before asking for something, moment when he knew you were keeping yourself in check not to be a bother, and every time it broke his heart a little bit. One time you carefully suggested that the two of you could take a small trip, since both of you were off work for a few days, and he could tell you were bracing yourself for disappointment even as you asked the question. He knew you still kept a lot of your feelings to yourself, brushing off things that upset you, and that’s what hurt him the most. Knowing you were still healing from what he’d put you through. There were good moments too, the majority actually, that made both of you feel like you were moving in the right direction. Like when he surprised you with a packed picnic basket one morning when you thought he would be at work. Or that time he saw you smile, really smile, when you heard him turn down a late-night meeting just to stay in and watch your favorite show together. It was a slow process, earning back your trust, but he was determined to make it.

One evening you sat on the balcony together, the glow of the city and the sinking sun blending together in front of you. Carlos had you tucked closely to his side, fingers twisting a strand of your hair absentmindedly as both of you just seemed to enjoy your time together.

”You’re quiet tonight.” Your soft murmur had him gazing down at you, smiling softly when he saw your face already turned up. Carlos moved his free hand to brush a strand of hair from your cheek.

”I’m just thinking.”

”About what?” Carlos hesitated, unsure how to express what he was feeling. When you reached up to grab his hand, tilting your head in that way he always found so endearing, he spoke up again.

”About how lucky I am. That you’re still here, with me, you know? That you didn’t give up.”

Your expression softened if possible even more, fingers intertwining with his. ”I never wanted to give up Carlos, I never wanted us to end.” You assured him, brows softly knitting together. ”I just needed to know if you actually wanted me here.” Carlos chest tightened, reminders of those painful days when he didn’t know if he’d be able to fix what he caused flashing through his mind.

”I do. I did and I do. I’ll always want you, need you.” He paused to lean down and press his lips against your forehead for a moment, taking a deep breath in through his nose as he gathered his composure. “I’ll never stop trying to show you how much you belong in my life, how important you are to me. Because you are.” Carlos tensed for a second as you pulled away, holding his breath as you looked at him. When you finally moved again you slowly leaned up to kiss him, lips soft and warm against his, and Carlos felt himself relax again. As you pulled back he saw a glimmer of something in your eyes, something lighter, as if the weight you’d been carrying was slowly starting to lift.

”Thank you.” Once again your words came out soft, softer than he felt he deserved.

”For what?”

”For fighting for us. For wanting to make this work. You could’ve just given up and focused all your time on all your other stuff, but you’ve really tried.” Your words had him melt, the arm he had around your shoulders tightening slightly. ”I do really appreciate these past months Carlos, and I know it hasn’t been easy but it’s been good. Great. You’ve been great.”

”It hasn’t been easy.” He agreed slowly. ”But it has been worth it. Every time.” Carlos leaned in to press another gently kiss against your lips before continuing. ”I’ll always fight for us. For you.” He didn’t say anything else. Neither did you. You didn’t have to. You just sat there, tangled together in the quiet and felt the wave of security and gratitude wash over you. Things were going to be okay, both of you knew it. Maybe even better than okay.

#imagine #formula 1 #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #f1 #formula one #f1 writing #f1 fic #carlos sainz #sainz #Sainz x Reader #Carlos Sainz imagine

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samoankpoper21 · 6 months ago

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MTL to date a plus size person - Shiratorizawa Academy

A/N: This is a REPOST!! I didn't like how the first one came out so I decided to revamp, rewrite, and edit, edit, edit this post. Took me forever but we finally made it y'all 🥲 Again these are based off of my opinion/what my gut fupa tells me 🤣 I am also writing from a chubby!/plus size! POC reader POV. All of them are aged up/of legal consenting age. Also in celebration of the fact that the Haikyuu! movie hit theaters in the USA yesterday!! Enjoy~!!

Content Warnings: some cursing, suggestive smut, fat shaming if you squint really hard, small mention of someone attempting to unalive themselves

Ushijima Wakatoshi: I don't know why but I FEEL IN MY GUT that this mans loves him some THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIQQQQQQQQQQ women. He's a big boi so he loves him a thiccccc partner. He loves squeezing your love handles and playing with your thighs, it's his stress reliever. The softness of your skin when he kneads it with his rough, course hands instantly relaxes him. You got cellulite? He doesn't care. Got stretch marks? Baby he'll kiss and trace 'em. Fupa? UGH HE LOVES THE PUDGE. One thing he cannot stand is how sometimes you let society's beauty standards dictate whether he should be with you, he finds it frustrating how you get lost in your head and start comparing yourself to the women you see via ig. He's always encouraged you letting you know IF your weight really bothered you then he would continue to support you by being your gym partner. Regardless please let this man continue to support you physically and emotionally because he will. The sound of the TV only served as background noise, Wakatoshi's head nestled on your tummy as your left fingers ran through his hair, your right hand holding your phone. You were scrolling through instagram a flurry of women similar in age popping up on your feed toting their tiny waist, wide hips, huge tits, and even bigger ass. Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! It was Wakatoshi's dm's going off. Staring in amusement at his sleeping form you chuckled. How could he sleep through all of that? Switching into his account you figured maybe it was Tendou sending him pictures from Paris. He had tons of unopened messages from women, his requests way past 50+. The most recent sender caught your eye, your eyebrow arching up, a slight frown forming. It was from a former classmate named Hana, your memories of her unpleasant. Regardless of the fact that she knew you and Wakatoshi were together in high school she still tried to get him alone, persuading him how much of a better partner she would be instead of you. Back then Wakatoshi just ignored her blatantly telling her, "I'm with Y/N." You clicked on her profile silently gasping; you hated to admit it but she looked amazing, her pictures garnering thousands of likes and comments. Most of her profile were pics of her showing of her "natural body" from working out, the men in her comments thirsty. You tried to switch back to your account but the phone slipped causing you to quickly catch it before it hit your face. Letting out a sigh of relief you glanced at your screen semi panicked, you had just opened Hana's message. >>Wakatoshiiiiiiiii (7:35:06PM) >>Wakatoshi heeeeeeeyyyyy (7:35:10PM) >>I'm talking to you (7:35:20PM) >>I know you see my messages Toshi-kun (7:35:40PM) >>Wow you're really going to ignore me? (7:36PM) >>You're really going to ignore me for that fat bitch 🤣 (7:36:15PM) >>She doesn't' deserve you (7:36:25PM) >>You deserve to be with a REAL woman (7:36:40PM) >>Sends tit pic (7:37PM) >>Like what you see baby? (7:37:20PM) >>Let me take care of you like a real woman should (7:37:35PM)

Love? you hadn't realized Wakatoshi stir in his sleep. "O-oh Ushijima." He frowned at the use of his family name, noticing you averting his gaze. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to it's just your notifications kept going off like crazy and I thought it was Tendou sending you something-" Wakatoshi gently peeled the phone away from your hand peering at the screen, his frown deepening. He sighed typing out his reply: 'Hana, I do not appreciate you sending me such pictures and calling the love of my life, my wife, 'fat'. I suggest you take anti-harassment classes or cyber bullying classes. Don't ever reach out to me again. P.S. A real woman knows that she doesn't always have to resort to using her body to get a man." After he sent that to her, he blocked her, closed his eyes, and deeply sighed. "Ushijima, are you...are you mad at me?"

"I can never be mad at you love. Frustrated, yes. You aren't calling me by my first name or the other names you call me."

"O-oh." you nervously chuckled. He sat up pulling you against him so that you were straddling him, his hard cock pressing into your clothed pussy causing you to gasp. His hands were softly running up and down your thighs, he leaning forward so that your foreheads touched. "Y/N," his gruff baritone voice called out. "I only have eyes for you. I just wish you saw yourself the way I see you."

"I do baby! It's just that sometimes," he shifted his hips causing a delicious friction taking your breath away making it hard to concentrate. "I-I get discouraged when I see -ngh- pics like that." He was kissing the sensitive spot on your neck that he knew would make you weak, submit to his desires. His right hand was squeezing and kneading your thigh, the left gripping your ass. "You are all I need. Rolls and all. I wouldn't have it any other way." Chuckling you kissed the tip of his nose, Wakatoshi's hips never faltering in the way it rolled against your aroused cunt. "I love you Toshi." "I love you too."

Tendo Satori: There's something aesthetically pleasing when you see a big girl/guy with a skinny/lean/muscular partner 😊 It just works okay? Again I feel it in my gut that this man LOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVEEESSS THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIQQQQQQQ WOMEN 😊 He's had to learn/adapt on his own to ignore the scrutinizing, judgmental stares due to him being a monster he has a monster cock there's no persuading me of otherwise so when he meets you being confident in your skin and owning the fact that yes you are "fat" he can't help but fall for you. ⚠️UNINTENTIONAL MANGA SPOILER⚠️ Satori becomes a chocolatier in Paris. When it comes to sex he's mid key heavy on the food play: he loves drizzling chocolate, white chocolate, whipped cream, or caramel on his partner's thighs, tits, and tummy; loves watching you squirm as you watch him slowly lick all the sticky, sweet ingredients off his favorite meal. "Ma chérie," he purred. "I made a new recipe and would love for you to try it."

"Of course love. You know I can never resist your chocolates. What's the occasion?"

"Valentine's Day is around the corner and the baker wanted me to create a small chocolate snack with a...punch." Punch? Knowing Satori he wouldn't outright tell you what that 'punch' was. "I hope you're not trying to kill me this time love."

"Never that ma douce," He kissed the top of your head as he set a saucer of small, dainty, assorted chocolate squares in front of you. "Enjoy." He smirked. Taking the milk chocolate you popped it into your mouth savoring the sweetness as it melted; you popped a dark chocolate square moaning as the sweet, strawberry jelly like custard gushed into your mouth. "Mmmmmmm mon bébé these are sooooooo goooood."

"Careful now love," He cooed with his back turned to you. "Those are aphrodisiacs." You nearly spit out the third piece you were on. Fuck it. "Is it working?" He asked shyly. You couldn't deny the embarrassing amount of wetness that was gathering in between your legs, your body heat rapidly rising. "Love?" Your quietness caused him to worry, turning around to find that you were no longer sitting at the table, your shared bedroom door slightly open. "Love?" Poking his head inside slightly he smirked to find you panting, lying on the bed naked with your legs spread, your sweet essence already dripping on the sheets. "Oh lo lo lo, so it works hmm?"

"If you don't shut up and fuck me right now Tori."

"Of course mon petit monstre."

Semi Eita: I'm not gon lie I kept overlooking this man but my gut kept going back to him. I am convinced that this man likes his women chubby 😊 Random but I saw this youtube short where they were simping over Semi's hands and I have not been the same since 🤣 His aloof nature allows him to tell people off when they disrespect you or if he feels that you are uncomfortable; however his aloofness is also his downfall sometimes 😅

Admittedly you didn't have the typical build of a body guard, standing at 5', 2" weighing at 250 pounds the academy doubted you: how can this fat chick be able to protect someone? Will she be able to withstand and withhold big crowds? You proved that despite your short height and heavy build you were strong, resilient; the academy calling you Little Ox. The academy had assigned you and 2 other male guards, Yuuji and Rito, to assist a famous band, the lead singer scoffing at you. "This puny thing is supposed to keep the crazy fans away?"

"Don't doubt her Kaku-san" your teammate Yuuji defended. "She has skill and talent, made it fair and square like the rest of us."

"Tch. Just make sure she doesn't get lost in the sea of fans." Resisting the urge to roll your eyes, you took note of the shaved headed drummer named Namio, the long haired bassist Kouki and the stoic, handsome, guitarist Semi with headphones around his neck.

As the band made their way through the airport from South Korea, fans immediately swarmed towards them pushing and shoving trying to get through. One intimidating look from you and an extension of your arm caused the fans to slow down, Kaku's eyebrow raised. Yuuji flanking from the back smirked at Kaku's reaction. That reaction was short lived as you noticed an individual moving at an intense speed towards the group from your direction. "Little ox!" Yuuji yelled. Everything happened in a blur: you hit the assailant's forearm knocking the knife out of their grasp, pulled them towards you, threw them over you shoulder slamming their body down, your knee to their back twisting their arm pinning it. Everything went quiet except for the assailant's labored breathing. "Let me go! Let me go!" he screamed.

"Y-N chan! Are you ok?" Rito asked.

"I'm fine. Oi!" you gently slapped the side of the assailant's head. "I'm giving you one minute to explain yourself. After the minute is up I will break your arm."

"I'm not talking to you! You just got lucky to catch me!" Your hold on his arm tightened and twisted further as you continued to count down. "59...58...57...56...55..." the assailant screamed, cursing at how you're hurting him.

"L-let him go." Kaku pleaded. Kaku shivered at the cold, distant expression you gave him. "45...44...43...42...41...40..." She truly is a monster Kaku thought to himself.

"29...28...27...26...25"

"Aaaaaaaaaaagggghhhhh! This is all Kaku's fault!"

"Oh?"

"Ever since that stupid guy announced he was dating that celebrity my sister has been so depressed! Are you really okay with one of your fans dying?!"

"Oi, did Kaku-san hold a gun to your sister's head and tell her to die? You think hurting this man will help your sister? She needs professional help. You're just trying to find someone else to blame because you don't want to help. Stop living like this." The man broke down sobbing, you sighing. "Rito -."

"Security's beside you Little Ox." Turning slightly you nodded your head easing off of the sobbing man, grateful that Rito, a man of few words, was always a step ahead.

"Y-Y/N-san-" Kaku began."

"Please refrain from intervening. That'll make my and your job easier. You asked whether I was able to protect you guys, withstand a crowd? This is enough proof right?"

"Y-yes."

"Rito! Yuuji!"

"Yes!"

"Let's continue shall we?" the walk to the van was quiet, Semi taking note of your full figure: your blazer a bit tight around your middle section, the way your love handles poked out, your ass sticking out of your black slacks. He sensed the dominant aura emanating from you the moment he laid eyes on you but found it thrilling to experience how much of a hold you had over your teammates. Semi isn't one to be submissive but he knew you could be submissive and that made the blood rush to his cock. He couldn't help as his imagination ran wild: you laying on his bed panting in all your naked glory, your tummy scrunching up, begging him to fuck you; Semi's long, thick, calloused fingers from years of playing guitar thrusting into your glistening cunt; Semi grabbing your hips slowly thrusting into you from behind as you pleaded with him to fuck you faster, harder. He needed release.

As the weeks went by Semi would observe you silently: admiring the way you carried yourself, how analytical and precise you were when it came to ensuring the venue they were performing at was safe and that no one could get through. He found himself drawn to you, falling for you. One day before a music show performance Semi found that his feelings for you were overflowing, bubbling over; that if he didn't express how he felt then and now he would go insane. Pulling you to the nearest staircase he trapped you between his arms, your eyebrow arching. "Mr. Semi, why are you trapping me in between your arms like so?"

"If I don't do this now I know I'll regret it for the rest of my life."

"What are you-"

"I like you." You could feel your face heating up as a million thoughts swept through your mind: was I that obvious? Did he catch on? I thought I was being careful with my facial expressions? Did I stare at him too long? His thumb swiped at your cheek bringing you out of your reverie. "What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" Biting your lip, tears threatening to spill over, fists clenched, you answered. "Semi-san, if you're only teasing me then I suggest you stop. This is going too far."

"I'm not." He firmly set. Looking up you saw the unwavering emotion in his eyes. You still couldn't believe that Semi had feelings for you, he never showed the slightest bit of interest; always politely saying good morning and making sure to let you pass first, you getting a whiff of his cologne. "But I'm..." you carefully whispered.

"Huh?"

"I'm bigger than you."

"So?"

"You don't mind?"

"I could care less if you're bigger than me. I fell for you not your body." Letting a moment of silence pass he asked, "Wait...do you not like me back?"

"No, no I'm sorry. I do. I like you. A lot."

Reon Ohira: Much like Semi Semi I struggled (I wasn't trying to be biased what with the community/culture I grew up around). He's literally the fine, thin line holding one from crossing into the least likely to date a plus sized individual - it may be because the anime doesn't really focus on him 🥲 or the fact that I don't know much about him 🥲😅 If I'm wrong please tell me 😅 In regards to Reon it's a loud, low hum when it comes to him; like I feel that he would appreciate the fluffiness of a plus sized individual. He's known to be the person to calm the team down/center them so I can imagine that his partner would be a little feisty in comparison to him.

Standing in line for a funnel cake you and your husband Reon Ohira were merely enjoying each other's company, conversation ebbing and flowing smoothly. Standing on your tiptoes you pouted. "Babeeee," you whined. "What's taking so long?"

"Well hunn we're at a carnival. There's bound to be a long line for sweets." He pecked your forehead and continued to stare ahead. Taking this time your eyes slowly swept over his features: prominent brows, sharp nose, pointed ears, tanned skin, the veins snaking down his forearm, the intricate design of it on his hands always turned you on. You were about to stand on your tiptoes again to whisper something raunchy until a hard bump against your shoulder caused you to stumble. Turning quickly to catch the offender you yell out, "Hey!" Ohira, arms snaking around your plump waist already trying to steer you in, calm you down. The man turned around to stare at you blankly, phone in hand. "Maybe you should get off your phone while walking."

"Sorry. Must'n have seen ya."

"How the hell you miss my big ass?"

"Babe," Ohira hissed. The man smirked and agreed. "You're right, how could've I missed someone taking up so much space?" Ohira lengthened to full height booming, "I don't appreciate you talking to my wife like that. I understand that you have your own preferences but disrespecting my wife is unacceptable." The murmurings of the crowd caused the man to feel uncomfortable, his face turning beet red. "Tch." He swiveled around and stomped off. "Are you okay love?"

"You know I coulda handled it."

"Absolutely not. Someone disrespects you they're disrespecting me."

"Okay daddy." You smirked knowing the effect that word alone had on him. Feigning innocence you snaked your arms around Ohira's waist, making sure to press your boobs against the lower part of his chest tightly so that it would push up against him, looking up at him with doe eyes. He groaned when he saw how big your eyes were. "Behave bunny." he warned.

"What are you talking about? I am behaving." You pressed yourself tighter to him pouting, making sure to "adjust" your chest, Ohira's grip on your waist tightening. "Do I need to fuck that attitude out of you bunny? Smirking you answered with, "After we get that damn funnel cake."

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jaykaysthicthighs · 9 months ago

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The Path Of A Singer | JJK

excerpt | the appearance of your old lover pops up on tv, and the horrible memories showed itself once again.

genre | heavy angst, cheating, abuse, minor fluff

rating | 18+

warnings | strong language, present & past, toxic relationship, mental & physical abuse, jk cheating, panic attack, alcohol and drug consumption, lots of crying, heartbreaking conversations, jk being vile, lots of yelling, jk manhandles the reader, mention of abusive father, mention of ptsd, reader being selfless (you might not agree with the decisions she's made, but don't hate her; she's a broken person), maybe more

wc | 4K+ (very short)

notes | it's been a hell of a long time since i wrote and posted anything....!!!

my inspiration came from watching the movie insidious: the red door lol. the reason for the mature rating is because of the strong language, the heavy conversations said, and the talks of alcohol and drugs. i want to say that i'm not romanticizing this type of relationship or the behaviors of the characters, i'm just making a story that maybe some people might have gone through. sometimes the decisions made or thought of does not make you a bad/horrible person. everyone had a reason good or bad; you just have try to be understanding. i also tried to make this as heartbreaking as possible, but for some reason i feel like it's not. hopefully it does pull some heartstrings for you guys.

You finally arrived home after an exhausting day of work. Your roommate wasn't home yet, so, luckily for you, you're able to binge eat without the concerned eyes of your friend watching you.

You walked your way to the kitchen and made yourself some sandwiches, you also grabbed some water on the way to the living room. When you made it to the couch, you plopped down heavily. You grabbed the remote and started scrolling through the channels. You came across a channel that was showing a music festival, and without thinking about who might be performing you clicked on it.

The first performer was a group called XG. As they were performing, you happily ate while vibing to their songs. At one point, you started singing as well, not caring that you still had some food in your mouth. If the neighbors were able to hear you, they would probably think someone is dying - yelling for help.

When you finished, you got up put away your dishes, and made your way to your room to change your clothes. As you were changing, you felt a bit lonely. You and your friend don't have any pets, no companion to keep any of you guys company. You exited your room with a simple sweater and shorts.

You made it back to the living room with a content expression on your face, unfortunately, it wouldn't last long. As you were about to get yourself situated on the couch, you looked at the TV screen, and the one person you never wanted to see again was singing.

You fell to your knees with a hard thud, watching the screen with horrid eyes. It's been three years since you saw him. In those three years, you tried your damned hardest to avoid anything and everything that involved him in it. The pain he caused you still resides in your little heart.

You didn't realize but you started crying; the tears rapidly falling. Your body started shaking; the little goosebumps displaying your skin. Your chest felt heavy like a huge wave crashing on you, and the water is rising up into your nose, making it hard for you to breathe. You felt like you were suffocating, and the lack of air was making your head light; dizziness taking its place.

On the outside, you were frozen, but on the inside, you were trying to claw your way out. You felt like you were scratching every surface of your body, but you weren't moving an inch. Your brain was screaming for help, but the only thing leaving your mouth was the hardness and unstableness of your breathing. Right now, you were wishing for your friend to come home right now and save you.

Three Years Ago

You were in your car driving your way to your boyfriend. Jungkook's manager called you demanding that you come and pick him up. You don't really know what happened, but from how his manager sounded, you were thinking that he got himself drunk and high again, causing thoughtless actions.

Not too long ago, Jungkook was able to get into his dream record label. After years and years of hard work, passion, and dedication he was able to pursue his dream. What you didn't realize is that with Jungkook getting to follow his dream of being a singer, he would soon lose his sense of self. In just two weeks he was starting to drink, and in another week, he started experimenting with drugs.

As time went on, so did your patience. You would try and try to stop him - to help him, but every time Jungkook would stop your advances. Pushing you away and causing you pain made Jungkook feel superior, it made him feel proud that he reached a certain height in life.

Your guy's relationship now consists of yelling and crying. Jungkook started to mentally abuse you, but even so, you would accept it. You didn't have the strength to leave him - to leave the man you love since middle school. You couldn't leave the man who would write songs about you, the man who would wake up during dawn and make you a big breakfast, the man who would call you no matter the time, the man who would always tell you how much he loves you every second of the day. You didn't have the strength to leave him.

With all your anger, you finally made it to the studio in one piece. When you entered the building, the looks on the staff's faces were concerning you. One of the staff went up to you and told you to not go inside the studio. You looked at them judgingly and pushed your way through them, but they still tried to stop you.

"What is the problem? Let me through!" you yelled. They gave you a sad look and apologized, "I'm sorry ma'am, but Jungkook is very busy, and I don't think it's a good idea for you to go inside there." Your anger was boiling, steam coming out of your ears. "Sorry for yelling at you, but I don't fucking care if he is busy. Jonny called me saying that I need to pick this asshole up, okay? If you're worried about me finding out that he is high or drunk - even both, don't. This is not new to me."

The staff in front of you looked like she was on the verge of tears. She opened her mouth to say something, but before she got the chance, a disheveled woman left the room your boyfriend was in. You watched her with wide eyes as she left the building with a smile on her face. You stomped your way to the studio door ignoring the pleas from the staff. You pushed open the door causing a loud bang, startling the man recognized as Jonny.

Jonny swiftly got up and the first thing you noticed was the bloody nose. You walked your way to him digging in your bag grabbing some tissues for his nose. Gently placing it on him, you politely demanded, "Where is he, Jonny?" The man before you faced his eyes on the floor. "Jonny, you called me here, so, don't fucking hide anything from me. Where is he?"

The man took a step back letting the blood freely fall again. He shook his head, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called you. I've ruined everything." You gritted your teeth and threw the bloody tissue at his face. "Where the hell is he, Jonny?" you yelled.

A second later, Jungkook swung the bathroom door open with nothing but some sweats on. Your heart dropped from his appearance. It was evident that he had fucked the girl from earlier. You guys made eye contact, and you could tell immediately that he was high out of his mind. "Get out, Jonny," you said without looking.

When you heard the door shut, that's when you crumbled. Your eyes started blurring with the tears that were coming. Your body shaking with rage. You walked up to the fucked-up man and slapped him. "Why? Why? Why the hell would you do this to me?"

Jungkook harshly grabbed your wrists and laughed. He laughed like what you had said was something funny. You can smell the horrible alcohol leaving his mouth as he laughed. "Because it's fun, babe."

The pain rippled throughout your body. You snatched your wrists away and bellowed, "You're hurting me! You're destroying me! What does she have that I don't? I thought you loved me?" Jungkook towered over you; he grinned, "I don't love you." Your whole world died. Never had Jungkook spouted those words. It tore you limb from limb, slowly but surely. And that was all it took for you to call it done.

You were fine dealing with his hurtful ways. You were fine being the punching bag. But you were not fine being cheated on. Even with Jungkook in this fucked-up state, not once had he said that he didn't love you, and not once did he ever cheat on you. You felt lower than before, and you didn't want to feel like that. You knew that the moment he started doing drugs and drinking alcohol, the man you once knew would be gone. Still, you had hoped there might be a tiny sliver of him inside, but today proved - his words proved you wrong.

Your eyes hardened and your expression became stoic. Without trying to sound broken you seethed, "We are done! You fucking hear me? I am done with your shit - with everything!" As you walked your way to the door, Jungkook rushed in front of you and pushed you to the ground.

The wind got knocked out of you; you started bawling your eyes. For the first time, you were scared of the man before you. Jungkook locked the door behind him and dragged you by your feet. You tried kicking your feet, hoping that his release would loosen, and you could run away. But before you knew it, Jungkook locked you both into the soundproof booth.

When his grip on you was gone, you scurried to the corner of the booth shielding yourself with your bag. Jungkook walked to you and kneeled to your level. "Don't hide from me, baby." He gently grabbed your bag and tossed it to the other side of the booth. You closed your eyes; you couldn't see the monster of the man you love.

You felt Jungkook tenderly cupping your jaw. You trembled beneath his fingertips; quietly whimpering. It stayed like this for a few seconds until you felt his touch disappear. With your eyes still closed, you could hear Jungkook digging for something. You heard a rustling sound of a Ziplock bag. You knew better, you knew that he was using drugs right now.

"Open your eyes, ____," Jungkook demanded.

You didn't answer, you didn't move. This pissed off the man in front of you. He slapped you, making your body jolt, making your eyes open. You brought your hand to your cheek, tears threatening to fall. "See, it wasn't that hard?"

"W-what do you want... from me?" you stammered.

Jungkook seethed, "You can't leave me. I won't let you leave me. You owe me. All that money I spent on you, all those years I wasted on you - I want that back! And the only way you can pay me back is by being my bitch. You are fucking mine, ____!"

You finally let the tears fall again. Your whole body shook like lightning shooting throughout you. Shaking your head, you wailed, "No! No! No! Please! Don't do this to me, Dad! Stop hurting me!" For the first time today, Jungkook felt his senses come back. Your words panged his heart.

Your mother was never in your life. It was always you and your father, but your father was an abusive man. He would try to find any little thing to blame you for, just for him to lay his hands on you; from hitting, kicking, even to cutting. You had met Jungkook when you were thirteen years old, he comforted, protected, and helped you. When you finally turned eighteen, that's when you moved in with him - that's when you finally felt peace.

Jungkook cupped your face into place. He frantically said, "____, it's me. Your dad's not here. It's me, Jungkook." His touch burned you; you felt like dying. You mustered all your strength and pushed him away. You gripped your shirt and yelled, "No! You're not him! You're not Jungkook! You're a monster and I don't even recognize you!"

Monster... That simple word rang in Jungkook's mind. Monster... Such a terrifying word. If he was a monster, his reason would be because of you. Unfortunately, all the drugs and alcohol in his system weren't enough to keep him sane for one minute. Jungkook launched at you. His hands wrapped around your throat, choking you, but still letting you breathe.

You started clawing your nails on his bare arms. Digging deep that blood starts making its presence. But all that Jungkook could see right now was red. He couldn't feel the pain you were giving him; he couldn't hear the agony in your voice; he couldn't see your wrecked state. Red became his friend.

"You are the reason for my horrible being. You are the reason why I'm a monster. You bitch! If you hadn't kept pushing me to pursue this fucking career, I would've still been the same. If you hadn't been so loving and caring and supportive, we wouldn't be in this predicament. I can't believe that I fell in love with a disgusting person like you. I can't fucking believe that I let you take control of my whole being!"

Right when you were on the verge of passing out, Jungkook released his hold on you; he backed himself on the other side of the booth. You were catching your breath. Your hands shakingly touched your neck, throbbing against your frail fingers. You were painfully coughing; mentally asking God to help ease your pain. Your eyes went in and out of vision; red and black dots were the only thing in sight.

Jungkook watched you with dark eyes. He watched as you were struggling to regain your previous state. He watched as you were crying from the pain, he inflicted on you. He watched the one person who was always with him, the one person who loved and cared for him no longer be the same. He killed you, painfully and slowly.

Present

"____, look at me. It's okay. It's okay." Your friend Lia gently held your face in place. She called out your name, praying that you would settle. She watched as you were frantically breathing; your eyes looking everywhere but her; your body shaking like the room was freezing.

Your panic attacks rarely happen, but when they do, Lia feels so useless. She wished that she could help ease your pain, she wished that she had the power to prevent this. But all she could do was hold you and tell you that you're okay.

Minutes go by until you are finally back. "____?" Lia cautioned, "____, look at me. Are you okay?" As you looked at Lia, you could see the worried expression painting her beautiful face. You hated yourself for making her feel like this, but you couldn't help it. This feeling will never go away; it gets buried six feet under, but once he appears they come back.

"Lia," you whispered, "I saw him again... on TV." Lia took a deep sigh; she hated the pain he caused you before and now. She wrapped you in her arms, holding you with such care. The second you were in her arms, you broke. You cried and cried, loudly speaking your pain.

Lia felt her shirt dampen, but she didn't care. Whatever you do to her, she will take it all in, as long as you feel better in the end, Lia will gladly be your tissue, your enemy, your punching bag. Lia murmured against your hair, "I'm here. I will always be here." She held you tighter; she didn't want you to fade away from her.

You took deep breaths to calm down your nerves. You pulled away from Lia and made your way to the couch. You brought your knees up and buried your face in the space between. You hissed, "I hate what he does to me. He's not even here!" This time you whispered, "And yet, he's able to bring me down to my knees... scared."

Lia met you three years ago; months after your event. You were just a newly hired TA. When Lia first saw you, you looked like a girl who was barely keeping her life together. You told her beforehand - when you started room mating with her, that you have PTSD and that your panic attacks happen from time to time. You didn't really tell her the whole story, just that you were in a very abusive relationship and that you experienced something so terrifying. She accepted you with an open mind and open arms; from then on, Lia became your rock.

Lia got up and sat right next to you. She wanted to ask you a question, but she was scared that you would hate her or push her away for asking. But this question has been in her mind for a while now. After taking a few seconds thinking to think it through, Lia wiped her sweating palms on her pants and inquired, "____, if you don't mind me asking... why didn't you call the police on him? You should've, 'cause I don't think he should be performing after everything he's done to you."

Your eyes started getting blurry; you told yourself the exact same thing, but there was a reason. With your head still buried, you softly replied, "It's easier said than done, Lia. I wished I called the police on him - I wish I could call the police on him, but I can't. Because in simple words... I love him. I hate myself for loving him. Even after everything he has done to me, and everything he has said to me, I love him. Does that make me a horrible person?"

Lia felt herself invisibly jumping out of the couch. No way does she think you're a horrible person. You're just a person who's been through something horribly traumatic. Her heart was filled with so much pain for you. Lia positioned herself so she was facing your small figure, and expressed, "____, no way in hell are you a horrible person. Far from it! I won't be able to say that I relate or know what you're going through, because I don't. But I am able to say that I'll support you and understand your feelings and decisions."

You lifted your head but still kept your eyes on your knees; you muttered, "I met him when we were thirteen years old. He was a very shy and reserved kid - hated social interactions. I remember..." you quietly giggled without realizing when you were remembering the fond memories, "I remember when he used to make small mixtapes every anniversary with letters. He wasn't always a horrible person. He used to be kind, supportive, and loving. One of my favorite things about him was his selflessness towards me. I loved that he would always think about my needs, what I wanted, what I was thinking, and how I was feeling, but in turn, he did the opposite for himself. It was a blessing and a curse."

Lia looked at you and saw the small smile showing. This look was rare for you, and every time it made its appearance, Lia would always treasure it. "He must have been a great person for you to smile like that." You furrowed your brows; you turned to Lia with confusion. "What smile?" you questioned. Lia rolled her eyes, "Well, there's no smile anymore."

You took a deep sigh and apologized, "I'm sorry for talking about him. It's just - just talking about him in this light makes me happy and warm... even if it only lasts for a few seconds." Lia noticed that you started tearing up. Your face was slightly contorted with pain; you were trying not to cry, holding it in but it didn't work. Your tears were freely falling, and Lia comforted you once again. You quietly whimpered, "During that time I called him a monster, but really, I don't want to remember him as the monster in my life because at one point he used to be my prince who saved me from one. I try to think and talk about him in this beautiful light that he used to be under - I want to remember him as that, but the pain he brought upon me is too hard to ignore." You started wailing at this point, "It continues to haunt me, and I hate it! I want to hate him, but I can't! I can't!"

Lia felt herself crying for your pain. She felt herself slowly dying by your words. It truly kills her that her most precious and beautiful friend is going through so much pain. As you both cried into each other's arms, you could hear Lia continuously apologize through her cries. You were so grateful to have such an amazing person as her.

Once you were calmed down, you pulled away from the still tearful woman and wiped her tears away. "Don't cry anymore, Lia." you sniffled, "What happened to me - what's still happening to me would never be fully cured, but I know that whatever happens next, you'll be by my side, and slowly but surely, I won't be able to be to feel the pain anymore. Okay?" Lia nodded her head with a soft smile. You're right, as long as she's with you and as long as you are with her everything will be fine. You guys are each other's glue - each other's person.

There is no doubt in your mind that this pain will pass by. You don't know how long that will take, but until the day comes, having Lia with you eases your heart from pain as much as possible.

"You mailed her my letter?"

"Yes, Jungkook."

The tired man finished his show with a bang, and even though people enjoyed his performance, Jungkook couldn't seem to feel all that happy. For the past year since he finished his rehab, nothing has felt more depressing.

The morning of that night when he woke up, Jonny had told him that you had left, and he was to go to rehab immediately. He hated you for leaving, he hated that you left him in such a messy state. Jungkook blamed everything on you. Jonny had told the ill man that if it wasn't for you, everything that he had worked so hard on would go down the drain. At first, Jungkook didn't understand why you left or what Jonny was saying, but as time went on, he knew that everything was his fault. His addictions and his abusive behavior were all his fault. The reason for your disappearance was his fault. Your pain - everything was all him.

Jungkook knows that there will be no way for him to fix the things he has done and the things he had said, but even so, he would try his damn hardest to fix it. When he finished rehab, Jungkook made it a mission to send you a letter every week, telling you about his days throughout the week, how much he loves and cares for you, telling you how much he is so regretful. Deep down he knows that he is being selfish, he knows that he should let you go - let you move on, but the helpless man is stuck in the past. The past is what keeps him alive. The past is his only source of reason. Jungkook doesn't want to let go of that one thing he has left of you.

Jonny felt so much pity for the man, he didn't have the heart to tell him that he didn't know your address. He would accept the letters, promising that he would mail them, but when night rolls around your letters would be burned. Jonny wanted to quit being Jungkook's manager, but you begged and begged for him to stay with the broken singer. You wanted Jungkook to at least have one person for him to lean on when things get hard. Jonny admires your strength - how strong of a woman you are, so, he agreed.

"You should just stop already, Jungkook. She's never gonna mail you back. I know your reason, but you lost her, and you can never fix that." Jonny was getting tired; tired of seeing the broken singer trying with no prevail.

Jungkook walked up to his manager and lowly whispered, "You think I don't know that, Jonny? Ever since I learned that everything is my fault... I knew that she would never come back to me. Yet I still hope - even if that hope is microscopic or nonexistent, I hope that I will be able to see or be with her again."

The fatigued man took a few steps back and lowered his heavy head down. His eyes searched the floor trying to keep his tears at bay, but it didn't work. The salty tears of this poor singer escaped and landed harshly on the wooden floor. Sniffling, the fatigued man uttered, "You think I don't know that you burn my letters?" Jungkook lifted his head up and saw the ashamed manager looking back at him.

He continued, "You're not as discreet as you think you are, Jonny. I went to your hotel room to ask for a favor... and I saw you burn my eighth letter with sadness swimming in your eyes. I connected the dots from there, and I realized that you never sent any of my letters because you don't know her address, huh? You're left in the dark like I am, huh? You know nothing about her whereabouts, about how she's doing, about anything, huh, Jonny!" The manager kept quiet; didn't know what to say.

Jungkook slumped down on the nearest chair with a hard thump. He leaned his head back with closed eyes and softly whimpered, "I now understand the meaning ‘You reap what you sow’… I'm never gonna stop. I know I can never fix this, but I promise you Jonny, I will never stop. Ten years - fifty years from now, I will keep writing her letters... knowing that deep down all of this is for nothing. I don't care if I'm shaming myself by doing this - I don't care about anything but her. She's not mine anymore but I'm forever hers. Let me live like this. Let me live with the consequences. Let me drown myself in this regret."

The destroyed man opened his eyes and gently moved his head to the side to see the lone figure of his manager feet away. With a deep sigh, Jungkook claimed, "You're just my manager, right? So, don't involve yourself in my pitiful life. Just do the job you were hired to do, along with getting my letters. Don't care what you do to them - burn them, keep them hidden, rip them up... doesn't matter, just don't let me know about it; let me falsely believe that you mailed them to her. Alright? Now please get the car... I wanna go home."

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kozachenko · 5 months ago

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(Click the image for better quality)

Yipeeee that Keiki and Mayumi fanart I posted the WIP of is finally done woooo- This piece was a very experimental one that I'm kind of OK on. Maybe because I've just gone insane looking at it for so long and I'm my own worst critic lol.

Artist's Notes;

So I've once again been playing around with my rendering style, mainly because I have been wanting to improve my lighting for a while now and as I was just scrolling through Tumblr, I saw some of the official art for that one webcomic-turned-animated-TV-Show Lackadaisy and was immediately inspired. I also have seen a technique a few times in the past where the lineart and shading are merged together, so I've been meaning to try that for a little while.

I did some experimentation on this one sketch of Keiki I posted in my sketch dump and I really liked the results of it, so I carried those over to this piece.

I ended up scaling up Keiki and Mayumi from the original WIP because I felt like they were both getting lost in the composition, and I'm glad for that because I think it works a lot better. I'm not a fan of how Mayumi's sword turned out at all, but it's not really meant to be the focus of the piece so eh. Overall, I think I could do better with my colours, probably because with Keiki and Mayumi's colours, I did them flat in greyscale and then used a brush on the overlay blend mode to colour all of them over, after which I changed the base layer for their colours from white to yellow and then lowered the opacity so it all went together better. I also decided to use gradient maps for a lot of the background elements, mainly to experiment with getting in my values first to make them pop out more. I ended up finding a really nice sky gradient on Clip Studio Paint that I really liked, and that kinda helped to establish the colour scheme of the background a lot. I think the whole "start in greyscale then colour" thing really works better with painterly styles rather than more illustrative ones, and while it is good at making sure your values are more readable, I honestly don't think I have the skill level to pull that off yet. Honestly, I think I've been looking at this drawing too long or maybe I added too much to it, but I wish I could've made the colours less monochromatic, but I'll just save that for the next piece I do.

I do love how the flame (...well it's more of a weird space rift than anything in this piece) and the lighting turned out, those were fun to do. I was initially struggling with the flame and how Mayumi is positioned in front of it before realizing "Oh wait! This is a weird abstraction of a weird creature! I don't have to follow the laws of anatomy!" and just dislocated it's flamey bottom jaw from the main body. I also changed the colours of it since I was really not liking how incredibly bright it was when it had lighter colours. Again, the gradient maps served the more painterly style of the flames well.

I also love how Mayumi turned out. I could do her sleeves better but that's more of just me needing to study how those types of sleeves fold in that position more. I'm also very happy with the posing, the technique I used for that was taking photos of myself in the positions I wanted, blocking in the silhouette and then modifying that by adjusting it to my lines of action that I drew on top of the original photos, and then sketching over the silhouettes and drawing in the shapes of the hands overtop of the photo if I needed to get the fine details right. As for what I do to take the pictures myself, I use a tall chair I have, prop up my phone with a phone stand, put on a ten second timer and scramble to get in position. Yes, I did have to use a bunch of thin markers I had to try and get the hand positioning on Keiki's pose right, yes I do have a fake sword that I used to get the positioning of Mayumi's arms and hand right, the sword was for an old Halloween costume from several years ago. I really like how both Keiki and Mayumi turned out in this drawing, I'll have to play around with these designs for them more in future drawings.

Also, if you wanna know why I draw buildings like that, when I watched Fantasia 2000 as a kid (One of the Disney movies where they make really beautiful animations to classical music) the way they drew the buildings in the first few sections Rhapsody in Blue segment (the jazz one with the cities) changed my brain chemistry and now whenever I need to draw buildings really quickly, I refer back to that. Since the buildings aren't really the main subject, I didn't put much thought into them.

As you can tell I am very tired of this piece, mainly because I made things harder for myself by overcomplicating the process compared to what I usually do, mainly with the whole "starting in grayscale then adding colour." I'd honestly just prefer having a black layer set to colour that I can just toggle on and off when I need to see the values, but it was good to experiment. And that was mainly the point of this whole drawing, to experiment. I'm definitely going to have to play around with this new style I'm going for, mainly because I liked how it turned out a lot in the augmented Keiki sketch, and also because I want to find ways of making it suit my style more. I also really want to keep experimenting with my lighting like this, it's very fun. Last but not least I am never starting in greyscale again because dear god I do not like the workflow it forced me into. I don't have a problem with the method itself it's mainly just a skill issue lol.

If you wanna read my headcanons for these two, I put them in my WIP post, so you can read them there if you want to. The more I look at this the more I prefer the simplicity of my WIP. I might go back to this and just take away the fancy colours and effects to see what it looks like without all of that stuff and reblog this post with that drawing, but for now, I don't think I can look at this drawing again for a while.

#touhou project #art #fanart #touhou fanart #touhou 17 #wily beast and weakest creature #keiki haniyasushin #mayumi joutougu #haniyasushin keiki

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unformula1 · 10 months ago

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movie night (CS55 x reader)

valentines day series - valentines’ day countdown: -2

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synopsis: you and Carlos have your first movie night in a few months. You start the movie and lean back onto the couch. Carlos leans on your shoulder, his gaze into your eyes not breaking. After a few minutes, Carlos shifts himself closer to you and snuggles with you. You let out a soft chuckle as he does so.

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pairing: carlos sainz x reader word count: 982 masterlist

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Movie night has been a tradition, started on the Friday both of you met and has happened every Friday night since. Movie nights hold a special place in your heart, they’re when both of you can be vulnerable and just hold on to each other like nothing else mattered.

If you were being honest, this was getting a little shaky. Your schedules were clashing, you can’t remember the last time you managed to sit down and enjoy life with Carlos. You couldn’t even remember if you asked him about his day this past week. You don’t know if he asked you how your day was either.

In fact, in the past few months, you lost too many movie nights because of both of your commitments clashing with it, so you two decided to compromise. Then you two did it again the next week…and then again for the 3rd time and a fourth.

You started missing it, so you cleared out your schedule, asked Carlos to do so as well and now finally, you two had time to continue movie night. It was going to be like a breath of fresh air from the ever increasing commitment list about to drown you.

You sit on the couch after grabbing the remote. You search the catalogue for a movie you want to watch and place the remote on the coffee counter. While waiting for Carlos, you scroll through your phone and look at a few posts.

After a few minutes, Carlos finally comes out wearing a grey hoodie and sweatpants. His hair was still messy from the weird positions he laid in while napping.

He quickly adjusted his hair and flashed you a smile, “I’m ready now.”

His smile never failed to make you feel better and it always looked perfect no matter what.

You place your phone on the coffee table and crack your back before fixing your posture. Carlos stands there and watches you do so, he doesn’t want to sit before you’re done.

You pat the part of the couch next to you, which prompts him to quickly sit down and lean onto you.

“Is this movie okay?” You ask him, pointing to the tv screen with the remote.

You don’t get a response.

You turn to look at Carlos, who’s just gazing at you with a giant smile on his face. He’s lost in his thoughts, drifting around in some other dreamland.

You smile back and shake your shoulder gently which snaps him out of his trance.

“Yes?” He asks.

“Is this movie okay?” You repeat yourself.

“Yes. Yes it is.” He replies, his smile not going away.

You start the movie and lean back onto the couch. Carlos leans on your shoulder, his gaze into your eyes not breaking.

After a few minutes, Carlos shifts himself closer to you and snuggles with you. You let out a soft chuckle as he does so.

“I missed doing this with you.” You admit, breaking the silence.

“Mhm.” Carlos responds.

You sigh, “I’m sorry for…for not being there when you needed me.”

Carlos shakes his head, “It’s okay.”

He lifts his head and looks into your eyes, “I’m sorry too.”

You smile at him and he smiles back. Both of you share a glance which ignites something in you.

You wrap your arms around him and hug him tightly. You don’t loosen your grip on him. He hugs you back.

A few seconds pass and you don’t let go of him.

“Are you going to let go?” Carlos asks you, patting your back.

You shake your head while burying it in his shoulders.

“Movie nights should be happy, you know?” He says.

Your head shoots up and you look at his eyes, “Who said I was crying. Maybe I just want a hug.”

“Okay okay.” Carlos replies before wrapping his arms back around you.

Another few seconds pass and you finally let go of Carlos, so he does too. You sit back down in your spot and Carlos shifts himself closer to you.

“We’re not done hugging right?” He asks.

You let out a chuckle and shake your head which makes him grip onto your waist and hold onto you.

His head gets buried in your neck and he makes himself comfortable there. Your hand finds its way to his hair as you run your hand through them and start patting his head. Your other hand wraps around Carlos, pulling him in closer.

You plant a kiss on Carlos forehead and he returns it on your neck. It tickles slightly and your heart warms at that. Your entire body feels amazing as Carlos continues to hug you.

“You smell great.” Carlos says, his head still buried in your neck.

“You too, mi amor.” You reply.

You feel a little chuckle escape.

His voice is slightly muffled, “Cariño…”

His warm breath grazes your neck and it sends a shiver down your spine. It’s perfect, it’s everything.

Your hand slides underneath his shirt and you can feel Carlos shudder. Your hand strokes the bare skin of his back. Carlos squirms a little and squeezes into your body a lot more.

He lets out a low groan which sounds much more attractive than you expected it to be. He frees you from his hug and looks into your eyes, you gaze back. His eyes glow, they’re like stars in the night sky. Carlos is like your star in this everlasting darkness.

“Your eyes are beautiful.” He says, a smile growing on his face.

“I know. Thank you.” You sassily remark which makes him laugh.

“What was this movie about again?” You ask Carlos.

He responds with a shrug, letting an unintelligible murmuring of words along the lines of ‘I don’t know’.

It’s moments like these which make you know you would never look back on your decision, that you would never regret being with Carlos.

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themoonsbride · 2 years ago

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After Dark | Albert Aretz x Reader

summary; Albert and Reader watch a movie together after he spends a long day filming for his channel .

warnings; none

notes; sorry I've been so inactive, I've been busy and haven't had motivation, hopefully I can start posting more often now . ♡ (sorry this is short)

(edit 7/19/23); lmao ty all for the likes even though it's short hehe, lmk in my inbox if I should write another albert scenario <3

°.•♡•.°

I've been scrolling through my phone for awhile now, mindlessly liking tweets and Instagram posts, waiting for albert to finish filming. He told me he'd finish around 7 pm, but it was now 8, and he seemed so occupied he wasn't even able to come out of his office to eat dinner.

I didn't want to disturb him so I just let him in his office and waited, and waited,, and waited. I think he's filming with Kaden because it's sounded like he's been talking to someone else.

"KADEN NO" I suddenly heard albert scream from his office, I almost dropped my phone onto my chin from the sudden alarm. Suppose I was right, I've met Kaden a few times before in the past, and he's really nice. I like his red hair, it's so bright red it reminds me of a tomato. I've also met some of Albert's other friends too, like Denis and Dani (Polarclub) and Temprist. They're all very nice people outside of their work, me and Dani are actually pretty close friends, and Denis is nice to talk to aswell, and his girlfriend is the sweetest.

"KADEN I TOLD YOU TO JUMP" Albert yelled, I sigh and find myself quietly giggling a little. Turning off my phone screen I decide to turn on the flat-screen TV that was kept sat on the black TV table across the king sized bed Albert and I shared. watching one of my favorite shows on a low enough volume for it to not disturb Albert's filming but loud enough for me to hear.

After what felt like the time span of 3 days, Albert finally entered the bedroom, looking worn out. "Hey" I speak softly, smiling at him. "Hey, did you make dinner earlier?" He asked, he probably felt like he was starving since he didn't eat, maybe I should've told him that I'd made food after all. "Yeah, but I didn't wanna be a bother so I just left it in the fridge for you." I reply, a hint of guilt clouds over his eyes as he sits next to me on our bed. "You never bother me, I wouldn't have care if you came in, my editor would've just clipped it out." His voice was slow and quiet. "I know, but I still would've felt bad." I responded as I slowly sat up, facing him properly.

"If you want I can go heat it up for you?" I say, in a question like manner, he smiles warmly at me and places a soft, long kiss to my lips, and I can feel it make my cheeks glow pink. I pull away and begin to stand and exit our bedroom.

When I enter through the doorway, warm porcine plate in hand with Albert's dinner, he's already lay in bed, the comforter pulled up to his biceps with a movie prepped on the TV screen, the lights dimmed lowly. I give him a small smile as I hand him his plate carefully. "I was hoping we could watch a movie together." He whispered down to me, pressing play. "I'd love to watch a movie with you." I mumble, kissing his cheek and snuggling myself into his side, attempting to be cautious of his food at the same time.

#albert aretz #albert flamingo #flamingo #mrflimflam #flim flam #cleetus #kaden fumblebottom #fanfic #albert aretz x reader #mrflimflam fanfic

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 1 year ago

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The DUFF 7

Warnings: groping, insecurity, food and body issues, and the usual. Proceed with caution.

Feedback is always welcome. Love you and thanks for the wonderful responses so far.♥♥♥♥

Image credit (I want to give dues where due but don’t want the creator to keep getting tagged in my posts as I have been approached by some before that they don’t want me in their notifs)

“Threw your clothes in the wash,” Curtis announces as you quickly pull the tee shirt down.

He wears only a pair of sweats, shamelessly showing off his muscled torso and thick arms. You catch yourself admiring the hair across his chest that trails down his stomach and below the elastic of his pants. He’s so effortlessly hot.

“What?” You face him, over conscious of your lack of coverage past your thighs.

“Yeah, figure I can’t send you home in dirty clothes–”

“How long is that going to take?” You blanch.

His cheek twitches and he quickly forces a smile, well, what could be a smile. You regret your questioning almost immediately. You must sound ungrateful.

“Not too long. You got somewhere you need to be?”

“No,” you sway nervously, “I only… hate to put you out. Thank you. Really.”

“I don’t mind. You can hang out here this afternoon. We can turn on a movie or something,” he offers.

The longer you stay, the more your anxiety builds. It’s not that he’s done anything wrong, it’s just your inner homebody. You like to be in your own space, where it’s all familiar. You find it difficult to relax anywhere else.

“Alright,” you agree as the tension nips up your neck.

He doesn’t move as you approach him. Not until you get close enough to touch. He shifts to the side and lets you through the door. You pass him in the tight breadth of the hallway, brushing against him as you do.

He follows and you tug at the hem of the shirt as you feel your ass peeking out. He purrs as you do. You walk faster as you get to the living room and promptly plop yourself down on the couch. He lets out a rocky chuckle as he patiently grabs the TV remote from the coffee table.

“I can’t help myself. You got a cute ass,” he winks as he nears the couch.

You mutter, not quite a thank you as you pull over a cushion to hide behind. He drops down beside you, legs wide as he flips on the television. He flicks through the options and hums.

“Anything in particular? I don’t watch much so…” he lets his voice trail off and turns the remote, holding it out to you, “here, you choose.”

You hesitantly take it from him. You mostly watch the same stuff over and over. Again, you are a creature of familiarity. The spontaneity of the last twelve hours is jarring to your boring self.

You point the remote at the TV and continue to scroll through the menu. There’s a 90s show you used to turn on after school. That can’t do you wrong, right? He might think it’s a bit lame but maybe he needs to realise that you are exactly that.

He slowly leans over and you flinch as you resist looking over. What is he doing? He slides down to rest his head against the cushion flush against the side of your leg. He wiggles as he gets comfortable, pulling up his legs to bend at the end of the couch. The weight of his head has you rigid and uncertain.

“Oh, I like this,” he wiggles just slightly, “you’re cozy.”

He reaches to tickle your knee and you hold back a squeak. It’s almost endearing, yet you’re not used to the constant proximity. The idea of someone who wants to be so close all the time sure seems romantic but it’s truly overwhelming.

“I could stay like this all day,” he says, “couldn’t you, bunny?”

You try not to fidget as the show starts to play. You place the remote on the armrest and lean your chin in your hand.

“Yeah,” you say softly, “yeah, it’s nice.”

He doesn’t comment on the show. You realise it’s not exactly his demographic. A teenage witch with a talking cat. Not really enthralling entertainment.

You wince as he lifts his arm and blindly searches out your free hand. He pulls it down and guides it to his shoulder. He presses it there and squeezes. You can’t believe how awkward you are. Just the act of cuddling makes you feel like a total idiot. And why? He was inside you half the night.

That thought makes you cringe. You really fucked this stranger. Just like that. And now you’re as good as trapped in his apartment. Hmm, you can’t really say trapped, that’s not fair. He’s been kind and you’re turning his generosity into conspiracy.

You drag your fingertips around his shoulder and he sighs, letting his arm fall down in front him. This isn’t so bad.

You focus on the screen, trying to calm your rampant heartbeat. You don’t know why suddenly you’re so nervous. The tide ebbs and flows. One minute, you feel okay, like this is all normal, the next you can’t help but fixate on how you are less than normal and you definitely don’t belong here. Or with him.

He chuckles and cracks the ice of your desolate thoughts. He drags his hand down your leg, caressing you lazily.

“I’ve never watched this before,” he remarks, “you like this show?”

“Mhmm,” you hum, “yeah, I don’t mind it.”

“Maybe that’s what it is, bunny,” he runs his finger along your thigh, “you cast your spell on me, didn’t you?”

You stare at him. You can’t see much of his face. Is he joking? You don’t know. It’s a sweet thing to say. He is very sweet. It’s all just a bit much for you.

“I guess,” you force out a laugh, “must be it, huh.”

#curtis everett #dark curtis everett #dark!curtis everett #curtis everett x reader #snowpiercer #au #drabble #series #the DUFF

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mystarsohee · 8 months ago

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AAAA ANOTHER KPOP AGERE ACC HELLO ! i was wondering maybe could u write anything for cg!eunseok? （/｡＼) maybe he plans an outing but his tiny is too shy to go out when small? thank u !!!

don't you worry

genre: fluff, like a pinch of angst

its springtime, the weathers nice, and theres a new dessert place down the road eunseok wants to visit. just one thing, you're feeling a bit too shy.

!!! non-sexual agere, only cg name used is seokie.

cg!eunseok gn!reader

eunseok aimlessly scrolls on his phone, while his other hand softly massages your head. a cartoon plays on the tv, which has kept you entertained for the past thirty minutes. you enjoy moments like this. comfortable silence, with affection from eunseok.

during his doom-scroll, he stumbles across a recommended post on his feed. "Memories Café, now open! Serving an assortment of cakes, churros, and pastries!" he looks down at you. he knows very well how much you love desserts. like, love desserts. eunseok knows you're going to enjoy the cute café. so, he saves the post and looks up the location. its on the next block! checking the time, its almost lunch time.

"baby, its almost time to eat lunch. what're you feeling today?"

too focused on the colorful show playing, you shrug. honestly you don't know what to eat. eunseok makes a move to get up, probably to reheat the leftovers from last nights cooking session together.

you're right, as you hear the microwave start. you get up to follow, and be good by helping set the table. you watch eunseok take the food out.

"thank you seokie!" you happily say to him.

"you're very welcome sweetheart. oh, i wanted to show you something!" he pulls out his phone, and opens the post showing the café.

"cute right?"

"oh yes, very cute. lets go some time seokie!"

the both of you continue to eat your food as you giggle together about various things. eunseok always enjoys spending time with you, creating moments neither of you will forget. he admires you while you slightly tease him for the sauce on his cheek. wait-

"huh? sauce?" he wipes his face while you laugh at him.

after your meal together, you play for some time while eunseok cleans up the table. after he finishes, he comes and joins you in the living room.

"hey my baby, are you up for a walk? we can go get some dessert? you've been so good lately, i think you deserve it. the weathers so nice too!" he says to you. you have to say yes right?

"uhhhh.." you think for a moment. "not really seokie.."

"oh? you don't want any dessert? thats a first." eunseok is stunned. you've never denied dessert! even if you finished all of your dinner, which usually makes you full, you'd still happily munch on some sweet treats. he makes a face at you, not to tease you or anything of that sort. just because you don't usually react this way!

you see his face, and your heart drops. he looks disappointed. you didn't want to make him upset! you quickly jump up and abandon the toys you were playing with.

"seokie.. don't be sad! im sorry." you say, cupping his face, the same way eunseok would when you were sad.

"hm? im not sad baby, im just a bit confused. you love dessert and going on walks!" he says, fixing his face now realizing how it came off wrong. his heart warms, seeing you mimick his strategies to comfort you onto him. he gives you a kiss right on the nose, and you smile a bit.

"i do want dessert.." you slowly start. eunseok looks at you, awaiting your response. you stuff your face into his chest. he hears some mumbles coming from you, but is unable to decipher it.

"use your words my love." he tries to get you to confess whats on your mind. softly rubbing your back, you move your face back into his view.

"only wanna see you seokie.." immediately you shove your face back into the warmth that is his chest. eunseok understands now!

"oh is that it? my tiny baby is feeling shy, and just wants seokie. i get it!" he says, like a light bulb lit up inside his brain! he explains to you that the two of you can go another day, and to not feel bad because the café will be open for a long time! after some more hugs, and a few reassuring words, you start to drift off.

eunseok carries you like a feather, your seokie is just so strong! you feel yourself being placed on the bed. a nap would be nice right now.. you think to yourself as you slowly transition into dreamland.

lucky for eunseok, you're quite the heavy sleeper! when he accidentally drops a loud pan while you're sleeping, you're still out like a light! when he accidentally screams while playing a video game, you don't even budge. he uses this to his advantage, and decides to see how fast he can run to the café, get some treats, and come back. he doesn't worry as much, since you know to facetime him whenever you wake up and hes not in the room. the two of you prefer facetime much more than regular calls, or texts.

before he puts his shoes on, he quickly runs to give you a kiss before he leaves.

"don't you worry my love. i'll be back before you know it. i love you." he whispers, hoping you get the message despite the fact you're sound asleep. grabbing his phone and wallet, hes out the door.

he started to jog, enjoying the nice day and a chance to get some exercise in while in the process of making his baby happy. whatever hes doing, as long as its for you, he would be the happiest man ever while doing it. as he approached Memories Café, he stopped to take a small breather. the jog was nothing to him, as it took quite literally less than 5 minutes to get there.

walking inside, the place had cute art and decor all around. he could just imagine watching you look at all of the cute decorations, you were easily fascinated. the barista called out next, signaling it was his turn to order.

he looked at the menu briefly, already knowing what you'd enjoy.

"hey uh, can i get 2 churros, 2 strawberry shortcake slices, oh, and an iced coffee. a to go order by the way." eunseok ordered. the barista completed his order, and gave him a ticket labeled "7" as well as his receipt.

standing around for a few minutes, and taking some photos to show you, he heard the barista call out his number. the order was packaged nicely in a cute pastel colored bag, oh he knew you'd think that was the most adorable thing in the world (we all know the most adorable thing is you) the iced coffee is placed next to it. taking another photo of it, he picks the food up, thanks the barista, and is on his way out.

afraid of ruining the food, eunseok walks home instead of jogs and checks his phone incase you notified him that you were awake.

the walk back took a little less than 10 minutes, and he entered your home. he set the bag and his iced coffee down on the table, and searched for any sign of you being awake. not noticing any, he heads towards the bedroom. in a slightly different position, but still very much asleep, he joins you on the bed. wanting you to sleep for a little longer, he opens his phone and decides to post the photo he took of the bag onto his social media. captioned "for my 💗"

you start to stir, probably because you sensed his return. you turned towards him, and opened your eyes slowly. a smile appeared on your face,

"hi seokie" you say, still a bit drowsy from your slumber.

"hey love. good sleep?" you nod and hum in agreement. the both of you cuddle for a bit, until you were ready to get out of bed. the time was in between lunch and dinner now, so he lead you towards the kitchen.

"i got you something baby, its on the table." he reveals. your face lights up, and you start to walk a bit faster to the table. you gasp, its a bag with the logo of that café eunseok showed you!

"seokie!!!! you got me dessert!" you look back at him with a smile, but hes already smiling down at you.

"yup. we can eat it together, just us two! i bought two of everything." he smiles even more, and pulls out a chair for you. grabbing the food in the bag, you gasp again. these desserts look so yummy!

"churro or cake? you can have one now and eat the other after dinner later." he gives you an option, since he doesn't want you to be too full when dinnertime comes around.

why did he give you the hardest decision ever? ultimately, you decide on the cake. eunseok hands it to you, and you thank him with another smile on your face.

he grabs one of the churros for himself, and you both take a bite of your desserts. a mutual "mmmm" after tasting how delicious they were!

"you wanna bite?" eunseok says, with some churro still in his mouth. you nod while swallowing the bite of your cake currently in your mouth. he picks up the other end of the churro, and lines it up with your mouth so that you're both eating a side! you think this is hilarious, so you giggle after biting a piece.

the two of you share more bites and laughs, knowing that maybe next time, you'll be up for a walk to the café. but for now, eunseok is willing to give up some quiet time, all to make you happy.

author note: my first request!!! i hope this lives up to what you had in mind when requesting :3 i think this scenario is so cutee!!!!! agh now im lowk obsessed with cg!eunseok .. as always, feedback is appreciated 💕

#eunseok x reader #cg!eunseok #cg!riize #agere #sfw agere #kpop #kpop agere #Riize #request #eunseok

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hard-core-super-star · 1 year ago

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sneaking out into town, holding hands, just killing time. [H.Steinfeld]

pairing: hailee steinfeld x reader

summary: amidst the chaos of the across the spider-verse press tour, and the unavoidable PR stunts she has to do to cover up your relationship, your girlfriend finds comfort in you.

warnings: pure fluff; a few curse words here and there; anxious hailee; PR stunts; bad descriptions of new york from someone who went there once two years ago

wordcount: 1.9k

a/n: i was supposed to post this the week across the spider-verse came out but shhh. there's so much more i wanted to add to this fic but it's already way too long so...maybe there'll be a part 2? we'll see. shoutout to this song for getting stuck in my head and inspiring most of this fic. this is dedicated to that one lovely anon who requested more hailee fluff. hope you like it!

* * * * * * *

You had never been one for fate.

You’ve always found it romantic, of course.

The idea that every step you take is leading you toward the place you’re supposed to find and the person you’re supposed to be is beautiful and downright inspiring. (You’re not a complete cynic, after all)

However, you had written fate off as something that only affects people in rom-coms and those trashy romance books that are all about how finding your soulmate will fix everything in your life.

So, yeah, needless to say, you weren’t a huge believer.

That was the case for most of your life until everything, including the planets and the stars themselves, seemed to align in just the right way that allowed you to cross paths with the most incredible woman you’ve ever met. You sincerely have no idea what you did to please the cosmos so much that they decided to put you on the same path as Hailee but you are not complaining in any way.

You would do everything all over again, including all the bullshit you had to go through, if it meant you could keep calling Hailee yours at the end of the day. All the pain and loneliness of your past fades away into nothingness every second her eyes are on yours.

That isn’t to say that the present doesn’t still have its difficult moments, even with Hailee by your side.

Being closeted is hard enough on its own but being a closeted celebrity adds a whole new layer to such a complicated situation. You still don’t fully understand why your girlfriend is so against the idea of publicly coming out (although you have your suspicions that the decision isn’t hers to make at the end of the day) but you support her regardless…even when it means spending a whole night alone…in your New York City hotel room…while your girlfriend is seen having dinner with some random guy you’ve never seen before in your life.

It certainly isn’t ideal but you know it’s just one dinner and a couple of paparazzi photos. Just something simple to take the public’s focus away from the fact that you and Hailee have been spotted together every single day she’s been in New York. Plus, with the Across the Spider-Verse premiere a few days away, and the matching outfits already decided on, it’s no wonder her team scrambled to find some way to cover up how obvious you two are getting.

You’re not the biggest fan of the idea but you would do anything for your girlfriend so you sucked it up and didn’t say anything when she left for dinner a few hours ago.

And that’s how you ended up here, cycling between paying attention to the random movie playing on TV and scrolling through your phone in an attempt to control your growing impatience.

You’re finally rewarded with the sound of the hotel door opening and you sit up from your position on the bed, eager to spend time with Hailee.

She quickly comes into view, looking as stunning as ever. She greets you with a half-smile while she begins to take off her blazer and her shoes.

“How’d it go?” You ask, your eyes scanning her face for an answer.

She sighs in response before moving to climb onto your lap once the articles of clothing are off of her body. Your arms wrap around her waist and pull her close, allowing her to rest her head in the crook of your neck. You don’t press her any further but you do run your hands up and down her back in an attempt to comfort her.

A comfortable silence settles over both of you for a long moment until finally, Hailee speaks up. “This was a bad idea.”

“It went that well, huh?” You reply in an attempt to make her laugh a little.

You feel her soft breath hit the skin of your neck before you hear her laugh. The sound brings a small smile to your face even though you feel a little unsure about what to do to help her right now.

“Let’s just say it wasn’t the best choice to make and leave it at that.”

You can tell she’s trying to poke fun at the situation but her voice lacks any real humor, leaving her words to sound more self-deprecating than anything. Your heart hurts a little at that fact although you don’t comment on it….yet.

“At least you got a good dinner out of it.”

She lets a huff of air before she lifts her head up from its resting place. You stare up at her with furrowed eyebrows while she takes your face in her hands. “I’m sorry. I should’ve just taken you out to dinner instead of agreeing to that mess.”

“Hey, you don’t have to apologize.” You lean up to place a few quick kisses on her cheek. “I’m not upset.”

“You should be. I’m a coward. I’m spending every day preaching how important it is to ‘live your life unapologetically’ while I hide who I am from everyone.”

“Not everyone,” you correct her. “And there’s nothing wrong with not being ready to come out yet. You know I would never hold that against you.”

She looks away from you, her hands dropping from your face to your shoulders as she does so. You barely catch the thin layer of unshed tears in her eyes but it’s enough to push you into motion. You reach up to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear before cupping her cheek with your hand. You don’t force her to look at you right now, you just attempt to comfort her in the only ways you know how.

“Hailee, listen to me, I love you. It doesn’t matter to me whether I get to take you out on stupidly expensive dates or not. I don’t care about the photos or the interviews or the tweets from your fans. All I care about is you. Who gives a shit if we’re the only two people who know the truth? We’re the only two people who matter when it comes to this relationship.”

A beat of silence goes by before she speaks again, the corners of her mouth quirking up into the smallest of smiles. “How do you always do that?”

“Do what, Lee?”

“You always know what the right thing to say is.” Her voice is a soft whisper as she turns to look at you again.

This time, you're the one who smiles.

You lean forward, gently wiping away a few of her stray tears until your foreheads meet. “It's my superpower. Sorry, but you're not the only superhero in this relationship.”

She laughs. A real laugh that makes the corners of her eyes crinkle in the way you love so much. You expect her to make fun of you or call you a dork like always but she doesn't.

Instead, she leans in. Her movements are slow but you don't make any attempts to rush her. You take the opportunity to let everything about the moment sink in.

The feeling of her breath against your lips, the way her eyes flutter closed, the gentle hand that holds the back of your head and pulls you in to close the few inches of space between your mouths.

It’s all beautiful and soft and full of the love you both feel.

You pull away after a moment, not wanting to ignore the genuine feelings the situation has brought out in your girlfriend. “I meant what I said, by the way. All I care about is you.”

“I know.” She gives you one more quick kiss before moving off of your lap and onto her feet. She holds her hand out for you to take, that usual sparkle back in her eyes. “Come on. We’re leaving.”

You tilt your head in confusion but take her hand anyway, already knowing there’s an idea brewing behind those brown eyes. “It’s one in the morning.”

“When has that ever stopped us before?” She replies as she pulls you up and into her arms. “We only have two days left here before we have to go back home and I intend to make the best of them.”

“Lee, it’s a business trip, not a vacation.” You attempt to keep your tone light but it’s obvious what your words really mean.

It’s not just that Hailee is here to do press, not sightsee, but it’s also the fact that going out together is always a risk. No amount of last-minute PR stunts can cover up the obvious love that flows between both of you. Especially with the heart-eyes Hailee can’t help but throw your way all the time.

She gives a small nod to let you know she understands your point but the smile doesn’t leave her face.

“That doesn’t mean we’re not allowed to have some fun. Just you and me.”

“And the hundreds of tourists walking around Times Square.”

“No one will notice.” She pulls you in closer, leaning down until her forehead rests against yours. “And it doesn’t matter if they do, it’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

You're about to protest, ready to tell her she doesn't have to do anything more to prove how she feels about you when she leans down to press a sweet kiss to your lips.

Your complaints fade away pretty quickly at that.

Her next words are spoken in a whisper, her breath hitting your lips. “I just want to go out with you. Treat you like you deserve to be treated.”

You're pretty sure your heart is going to beat out of your chest if she doesn't stop being so adorable right now.

“Well…when you put it like that, how am I supposed to say no?”

You don't think you've ever seen anything shine as bright as her smile. She gives you one more quick kiss before rushing to get ready, changing out of her fancy clothes and into jeans and a hoodie in the blink of an eye.

You admire her for a few seconds before following suit, putting on the closest pair of sneakers you can find and slipping on a sweatshirt that you totally didn't steal from your girlfriend. She doesn’t say anything when she sees what you’re wearing but the small smirk on her face tells you everything you need to know.

She holds her hand out to you again and you take it without any hesitation, letting her lead you out of your hotel room and toward whatever destination she has in mind. You realize very quickly that you don’t care where she’s taking you as long as her hand stays in yours.

She ends up leading you out of the hotel and into the busy New York streets. Even in the middle of the night, Times Square is chaotic. And that's putting it mildly. It's bright and loud, and slightly overwhelming. It's a sight you don't think you could ever get used to despite how often you and Hailee end up in the city.

And yet, it's exactly that chaotic energy that makes you feel at peace. There's so much going on, so many different things to look at, that most people don't even spare a glance your way. You blend in among the bustle of the street, allowing Hailee to walk with her arm wrapped tightly around your waist.

For once, you don't have to pretend to be anything less than what you are.

You're in love.

You're free.

And you're sure there's nowhere else in the world you'd rather be right now.

#hailee steinfeld x reader #hailee steinfeld x female reader #hailee steinfeld x y/n #hailee steinfeld x you #hailee steinfeld imagine #hailee steinfeld fic #hailee steinfeld fanfiction #hailee steinfeld fluff #hailee steinfeld #across the spiderverse #hawkeye #marvel #mcu #mcu imagine #mcu fanfiction #wlw #wlw fic #writing #if you made it this far happy pride month!

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kazoo-goddess · 1 year ago

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So, I've wanted to make a post like this for some time, but I only just got the motivation because of an ask I got recently. I want to give a piece of advice to everyone, in general, to keep in mind when using any social media platform--advice that I wish someone had given me way back when, that I feel is important to pass on:

Not every post you see is for you. Not every post is about you.

This is not meant to be a negative thing, or a put-down! It is not meant to dismiss anyone. It's really what it says on the tin: When you see a post cross your feed, and you disagree with the post or it upsets you because you disagree with the message it has, try and keep in mind that you may not be the target audience for the post. In particular, take this into account for advice and positivity posts--The OP doesn't have anything against you personally when they share words that are meant to be uplifting that you don't agree with. A post that says "Keep going! You can do it, even if you think you can't!" probably isn't meant to put down people who are in a position where they very literally cannot do it or think their way out of their situations. Like this post, it's more likely that the OP is sharing positivity or advice that they themselves would have liked to hear.

Even this post, the one I'm writing now, might not be for you or about you! If you disagree with my viewpoint, that's okay, and there's nothing wrong with that! But I, personally, am writing this post for people who might need to hear it--people like me, who are easily upset or hurt by things they see or hear in passing, whether on the internet or real life. I'm not writing it because I want to spark an argument, I promise.

Posts aren't always meant to spread outside the OP's original circle of followers and friends. But that's a hazard of posting to public social media websites--a joke originally meant to have an audience of 12 people close to you can suddenly explode, getting thousands and thousands of views and reposts and going completely out of the OP's control overnight! It's no one's fault; it's not done maliciously. Sometimes a post or joke just resonates with others. But maybe it doesn't resonate with you--that really is okay! Just try and remember, if it gets under your skin, that it isn't for you. And if it's not for you, it's okay to just ignore it and move on! It can definitely get annoying when it's something you keep seeing over and over from friends and acquaintances reposting it, and I'd never fault anyone for losing their temper over it--but sometimes, just taking a second to remind yourself that you weren't the audience for something can really help calm you down and help you feel better and move on with your day.

While this goes for advice/positivity posts, it also goes for opinion posts! And in this case, to be completely, perfectly clear: I mean harmless opinions. A ship they like that you don't; a tv show they enjoyed that you didn't; a character they really love that you absolutely cannot stand. The kind of opinion you disagree with so much that makes you feel absolutely steaming mad. (Again: This does NOT extend to these things when they go into a genuinely harmful category. No homophobia, no pedophilia, nothing like that. I am talking about harmless, mundane disagreements.)

Maybe you see a post talking positively about a manga that makes you feel ick. The OP more than likely didn't write that post with the hopes that it would reach you specifically just to make you upset! (And if they did, that's rude, and an entirely different can of worms that this post is not about! >_>;) But the post upsets you anyway, even if it wasn't MEANT to. It's understandable, it happens! But the thing is: You don't need to engage with that post if it makes you feel bad! If you have a post blocker, you can block the post or blacklist the tag; if you don't, you may just have to scroll past. It can be so, so, so tempting to try and get in a biting comment in the replies to snap at the OP and tell them, "No, you're wrong, your opinion makes me mad and I don't want to hear it!" Trust me. I know. I get it, because I've been there! But in the grand scheme of things, it's not worth it or healthy to burn yourself out over it. It wasn't for you, and it wasn't about you! And you're better off doing what you can to take care of yourself, and preserving your health and happiness where you can.

I feel like I'm writing this with sort of childish language, and it might feel like I'm talking down to others. But really, I think I'm just writing it in a way that a younger me would have understood and taken to heart if she'd seen it. I hope that, if you read this, you can see it that way too! There's a part of me that feels scared that this post in itself could explode with notes that will be very upset with me for my thoughts on this, whatever their reasons may be, but I wouldn't be making it if I weren't prepared for that possibility. If the message I intend to get out can reach even one person who it can help, then I think that's worth writing it for. Because, I want to reiterate it one more time, because it can be so easy to forget it and get yourself furious in a self-destructive way, sometimes you have to remember:

Not every post you see is for you! Not every post is about you!

#I really hope that I've done what I can to keep people from misunderstanding my message here!#I'm writing this partially because I got a very angry ask about a reblog I did including a character I like lol #and I'm writing it partially because my physical health is currently in a very bad place #and that is in part because I did not manage my stress and anger in a healthy way #and as a result #it took a toll on my body! and it is not fun!#so hopefully this can help someone somewhere from being in my shoes #five or ten years down the line #anyway late night ramblings #I rarely talk on here anymore! sorry!

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hirik0 · 6 months ago

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Catch me if you can part 1

Ghost/Roach | Celebrity AU

Gary 'Roach' Sanderson on Tiktok know simply as 🪳Bugboy 🪳 has one of the biggest fan edit accounts for popular actor Simon Riley best know for his roll as 'the Ghost' in a action movie the first project he worked on after his long child actor career. It was quite a change seeing him going from being the love intressted in teenage movies to a wanted CIA agent that got dropped by the agency. Roach liked both versions what maybe is related to the celebrity crush he has since he is 12. Earlier this year Simon Roley returned to the popular cop show 'The new Sherlock Holmes' he left to film a movie trilogie where he was a Knight fighting in a medieval war. Being the well beloved leader of the SWAT team, Martin Jackson, from new Scotland Yard. It honestly was a hugh suprise he returned but he told in interviews its a fun project while he looks for other interesting projects.

"Stalking Rileys social media again, Gary?", Rodolfo his colleague and best friend asks amused. Having a steaming mug with coffee in on and and an appel in the other. He places the appel on Roaches desk. Roach shakes his head, he is in fact working, staring at the grafic hes making for the past 20 minutes, trying to figure out how to make it that dont causes him to have remake it again in something way worse then what he has.

"As if you dont do the same with Alejandro Vargas", Roach retorts amused, trying to think like the higher-ups, how a social media of a sports team should look like. He knows how to run a successful account, has even a degree in it, but the higer-ups have very diffrent views. So everything has to be done 3 times till they found a compromise, so they are always 3 weeks behind trends, having to prove a trendy audio will give them engagement. God if he finds the person that put such a short leach on the marketing team, he will murder them. They work for a very old and traditional Cricket Club, emphasis on old some of the higher ups probaly where alive when the club was founded.

"Do you rember the teribel joke Mr. Henderson told last week? I need it for a post, asking people to share their own bad jokes for engagement bait." Rudy gives him do you really want to do this look. Nobody laughed about that joke, not even the old men at the top.

"Honestly my brain has a filter for his jokes so no." Roach groans dramatically, throwing his hands in the air, mumbling a I can't work like that. Bitting in the appel in frustration. Now he has to ask the man what will lead to him needing 20 minutes explaining how engagement on social media works and why it's so important. Already hearin Hendersons back in my day peopel listened over radio an we needed no silly dances on the internet, back in his day the steam maschie wasn't invented yet. Taking another bite from the appel, not liking its taste, the free fruits had better quality ones.

"Just tell him it's so good he needs to share is with the fans." Roach gives him a sceptical look, because that won't work right? It can't be that easy. Roach is ready to leave the office, when Rudy is winking him over. Rudy is curently frowning over an e-mail he got. He start reading it crossing his arms in front of his chest a cooperaton with another firm. Rudy is scrolling down to read the rest of the mail. Roach is resting his read on the back rest if Rudys chair looking over his right shoulder. Flying over the opening to were the mouse pointer is.

As i mentioned above I work at a for hire PR-Firm and are mainly know for work at Galas, Award cerominies and other red carpet events, but recently get the chance to work in other areas. We will mangaging the official Tiktok and Instagram for the hit TV show "The New Sherlock Holmes" for the up comming season and for the entiere UK and rest of Europe tour for a K-pop band. We would really love to work with your Tiktok and Instagram team to learn how they are making the short videos. We offer helping your Team for big gala events of the Club to get better resultes.

with warm regards

Valeria Graza

"Did she ask us for help and then insulted or work?", Roach is asking frowning. Finishing up the fruit.

"She sure did", Rudy say while forwarding the E-mail to their boss Kate Laswell, in the end its her choice and not theirs. Roach signs there is no more time to stall to get this stupid joke from Mr. Henderson.

"Better get the joke." He says before leaving the office to go to the elevators.

"Dont get stucked in the 1850s, while you there", Rudy is shouting after him. Rudy reads over the mail again, his eyes falling on to the name of the TV show, the chance for Roach to meet his celebrity crush, sometimes live is unfair.

#call of duty #simon ghost riley #gary roach sanderson #roach cod #ghostroach

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thiswasneverthat · 1 year ago

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wednesday

ㅡ seven masterlist

❅ chan x fem!reader

❅ smut, fluff (I think), a little bit of jealousy issue, praising

❅ wc: 1.2k

A few days ago, your boyfriend decided to create an Instagram account on a whim, also perhaps sparked by sheer curiosity.

Despite not being one to value social interactions beyond family and closest friends, you found yourself amused by his impulsive decision. Nonetheless, you offered Chris your undivided support. You even helped him to pick a profile picture and username.

And it was no surprise for you to see many of his coworkers and college friends follow him on Instagram cause he had always been a popular guy, even in the past.

When he uploaded his very first post, which was some pictures from your holiday together a month ago, a lot of his friends left some nice commentsㅡ complimenting how stunning he looked in the pictures that you took.

"I see you're getting even more popular on Instagram," you teased him when he just got home from work.

"Can you blame me? I have been told so many times that I am irresistible," Chris answered with a smirk, which immediately had you rolling your eyes at him.

"Just go take a shower, Your Highness. You reek of rotten narcissism."

Chris only laughed at your snide comments before he leaned closer and pecked your lips. "I will be right back, milady."

While waiting for Chris to finish his business under the shower, you seized a can of beer from the fridge and sat down on the couch in the living room. You then turned on the TV and immediately scrolled through the screen to pick a movie.

As you both had planned since the morning, the two of you would be indulged in binge-watching while cuddling. You both even made a pact to switch off your phones so you wouldn't be disturbed for the entire night.

However, a few moments later, Chris' phone which was placed on top of the drawer beside the couch flickered several times.

"Whoops, sorry but he is mine tonight," you murmured to yourself as you reached for the phone with the intention to turn it offㅡ before you instantly changed your mind the moment you saw the screen.

There were Instagram direct message notifications from someone with a name that was not familiar to you.

sent a photo.

Are you busy? Do you want to hit the gym together?

And maybe we can also hang out at my place tonight?

Your heart dropped to your stomach after you read the messages.

Well.. maybe it was a little exaggerated to say that your heart dropped to your stomach because it was not physically possible, but the point was, you were simply shocked.

Not because another girl just sent your boyfriend direct messages on Instagram, but because of the extremely straightforward audacity to flirt with Chris.

So, without thinking twice, you launched the Instagram app to see the pictures that she sent.

"Holy shit," you then hissed harshly, eyes as wide as a saucer.

Displayed on the screen were two pictures of a girl with long hair. She seemed to be in a gym studio and she was only wearing a sports bra that flaunt her cleavage and a biker short that accentuated her plump ass.

And as if your hands had minds on their own, you zoomed in the pictures to see her face clearly.

"Damn, she is so stunning," the words slipped out of your mouth without you realizing.

She was devilishly luscious. She had a demure yet alluring smile etched on her face, while the glint in her gaze seemed to possess a spellbinding intensity that left you momentarily speechless.

Your very teeny-weeny jealousy that was previously ignited by her messages then was quickly replaced by your insecurities.

As much as it pained you to admit, but if Chris was to cheat on you with herㅡ which you highly doubted, you would still understand his decision. Hell, even if you were a man yourself, you would love to date her.

"Damn, I definitely should start working out again," you said to yourself while still staring at her pictures.

"Why? Why do you want to work out again?" Chris asked from the doorway. He frowned at you while drying his hair with a towel.

"Uh, it's because.."

"Hm? Because of what?"

You thought for a moment as your pursed your lips. You knew he wouldn't be mad at you just because you read his messages, but you couldn't help to feel bad because it was also a part of his personal space.

"Well.. I didn't mean to, but I accidentally read your DM from Instagram and.."

"And what?" Chris asked casually, he didn't even react when you said you read his messages.

"Come here then. You need to see this."

Once Chris sat next to you on the couch, you handed him the phone and observed his face for his reaction.

"Oh, she is a coworker and she had always tried to approach me at the office but I never gave her any response that was beyond a professional relationship between coworkers," Chris clarified with a shrug, still couldn't grasp what you were trying to convey.

"No, that's not what I mean, babe. I know you wouldn't do that."

"Then what?"

"Look at the pictures she sent you," you pointed to the screen with your finger. "Isn't she gorgeous? Look at her ass.. and even her boobs. I really need to work out again, I swear."

"Baby.." Chris was visibly stunned for a moment as he raised an eyebrow at you. "Have you seen yourself? At least in the mirror?"

"What..?"

"Tell me you are joking," he shook his head before he put his phone on the table and cupped your face with both of his hands. "Please, tell me you are joking."

"No, I am not," you answered seriouslyㅡ which caused Chris to break into a very wide smile.

"She got nothing on you, baby. You are unrivaled, don't you know that?"

"Liar," you snorted and rolled your eyes. You thought he only said that to make you feel better.

"Oh, you silly," still with a wide smile on his face, Chris leaned forward to playfully nibble on your lips. "But, I can help though if you want to work out."

Shortly after he had finished kissing, nibbling, and biting your lips, Chris carried you to the bed and pinned you underneath him. He trailed feathery kisses along the column of your neck to your shoulders.

"I have just the perfect workout routine for you," he whispered next to your ear as he caressed your tits through your shirt.

And.. Long gone was your insecurity.

When he started to undress you, all you could think about was him.

"You are so beautiful and my heart is aching," Chris said against your skin before he latched his mouth on your nipple. He took his time to suck and lick your tits, leaving reddish marks all over your chest.

"You are the prettiest and you are mine," he continued with a smirk as he buried his face between your legs. He teasingly nuzzled the bridge of his nose against your folds before he spoiled your dripping cunt with wet kisses and delicate touches of his skillful fingers.

"I love you, baby. So, so fucking much," those words escaped his mouth as he glanced up to lock his eyes with you while rubbing your swollen clit with his thumb. "The only workout you need is this. Got it?"

#skz smut #bang chan smut #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfiction #skz fanfiction #chan smut #bang chan x reader

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