#maybe that doesn't really make any sense idk
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Final actual thoughts on the Agatha All Along finale:
Good:
- Everything with Nicky. That flashback was really well done and the climatic building song at the end was just fantastic
- I had heard the "Billy is making the road" theory and am well aware it would make perfect sense with his character, but I never actually seriously believed it for some reason until the twist was happening and I was like "wait" lmao. So yeah, that was good and it fit a lot of things into place about Agatha's behaviour I should've honestly put together way sooner
- "Am I killing this boy so my brother can live!?" "Oh Billy, sometimes boys just die" bitch, I'm sobbing
Bad (personal opinion alert!!!!)
- Why is Agatha Billy's ghost sidekick now? Did they just wanna get rid of the threat she posed but keep Kathryn Hahn around?
- The emotional core of the show is the coven and their ties to each other, Rio included. This leads into a couple points:
1) I feel Rio could've been a bit softer to Alice. Even if she started off the interaction as cold, she could've had some warmness for her for even just a moment. More "like greeting an old friend" death than "cold unforgiving cruelty" death. Though Alice's death was supposed to represent the latter, so it works I guess (I am just in denial)
2) Agatha not caring about the rest of the coven members other than Billy right up to the end kind of breaks the illusion that the coven ever formed any real familial bond at all, which shits on the weight of Alice's and Lillia's deaths (and Lillia's whole arc), since they were about sacrificing themselves for the others. The road being a fabrication by Billy just made this feeling worse
- Rio and Agatha should've had some resolution, like??? The tension, as it's introduced to us, is that they both still love each other and are even good for each other. Rio had to fulfill her purpose even though she didn't want to, knowing she'd hurt Agatha. And Agatha hates her for it, despite knowing Rio had no say in the matter and even did her a great kindness letting Nicky stay for as long as he did. They have no reason to hate each other logically, only emotionally. Agatha was seemingly set up from the start to have to work through that grief, by the end of which the two could reconcile, and at that point Agatha could go to death willingly or whatever. But the show ended up not exploring this at all, portraying Rio as a kind of toxic ex out of nowhere in ep. 8, and Agatha's eventual kiss with Rio and subsequent death was fueled by an ultimatum rather than a fully free and intentional choice. And then Agatha dies and Rio doesn't even get to talk to her properly now that the tension is (maybe???) resolved (or maybe not considering it seems like ghost Agatha is still avoiding Rio). This was not a great character arc. And I can't help but feel a proper resolution wasn't reached—not because it was the best writing decision—but because she has to stick around as a ghost for a future show/movie and needs something to do
- Not enough Jen.
Neutral (aka Misc. Thoughts)
- I guess this kinda confirms Billy is both Billy and William? Like, I think it's sorta maybe implied Rio can't reap William's soul while Billy is in there, so he's sorta preventing both of them from dying? Or not? Idk?
-[If not, recall that Billy is technically only three years old in MCU canon, which is very weird]
- Episode 7 still the best episode, fight me
#agatha all along#agatha all along spoilers#marvel#wiccan#agatha harkness#william kaplan#billy maximoff#agathario
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did. did alyss think that red eyes would be perfect for cheshire because. those with red eyes are the only ones besides glen who can approach the core. and alyss is kind of half merged with/the spokesperson for the core. and cheshire is very dear to her. just like lacie was to the core---
#pandora hearts spoilers#tre reads#pandora hearts#intention of the abyss#alyss#cheshire cat#core of the abyss#lacie baskerville#just fic thoughts#h e l p#like obviously they don't like ALL children of ill omen#(see: her seething hatred of vincent and her general disregard for break's desire to keep his eyes)#but most of the people she sees are probably the illegal contractors who are gonna be doomed no matter what#maybe the core's influence makes her associate red eyes with happiness or something... man idk lol#maybe that doesn't really make any sense idk#but. maybe. -w- it's certainly fun to think about the possibilities anyways.
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while teen while goblin while aroace while injured while doing your best
#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#riz gukgak#figueroth faeth#sklonda gukgak#dimension 20#this. mmmmhhh this is so. I did Not know how to draw this really.#I am very normal about riz (<- lying)#it's a brennan-dm d20 campaign the bad guy is always capitalism (I am saying this with clenched teeth)#riz out of all of them being aroace fucks with me SO bad. bc its also established that elmsville specifically and probably the#majority of solace is not. made for goblins. and that becomes sklonda being worked to the bone and pok dying on the job#and riz spending all his time trying to keep his friends together. maybe to the point of it being injurous#like. do u get what I mean. its an economy of time it takes your time it eats up your time#not just the gukgaks but everyone you have to spend time to get to live and you don't have a lot of time left in a day#and you have to spend it carefully. you have to prioritize#you're somewhere without an established community and companionship is bought with your time spent working#this place doesn't take care of you. at the end of the day who do you have who'd prioritize you. do you understand me#the evolved aroace loathing where if your friends and family are granted more time nobody would have to choose. we live in a society#holds ur hand we live in a society. idk if Im making any sense#anyway . uhhh riz is my favourite that's my statement thank you for listening. au revoir
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unpopular opinion: there is no point in the show in which jeid would have made sense. jj never seemed interested in him, and his feelings always felt misconstrued and misplaced. they never had that kinda chemistry.
#r.text#unpopular opinion#jennifer jj jareau#jennifer jareau#spencer reid#anti jeid#furthermore i didn't even realize they were actually friends until jj made him henry's godfather#even that decision doesn't make sense to me#especially considering she didn't trust him alone w henry until he was like what 5 or 6??#what episode did they get drunk n hungover? y'all know the one#maybe that doesn't stand out to most ppl but idk#me? im not finna make someone my child's godparent if there's a point in time that i would b worried about them being alone together#like at any point#why would i make u a godparent when im worried bout if u can take care of them without me#the trust is the point n canonically it wasn't there#they always read as older sister/younger brother who love each other#are there for each other during hard dark times#but aren't really close cua they share no commonalities#i genuinely don't understand how ppl see anything but#that said yeah even jeid as best friends doesn't really make sense to me#she's never really interested in him enough for that to ever make sense#she doesn't even ever care to listen to his lil infodumps#which contrary to fandom beliefs she doesn't have to listen to him if she doesn't want to#her not wanting to doesn't make her a bitch either#criminal minds
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Mobgle what does it mean when your friend whom you have just known for a few days keep saying stuff like "I'm glad to have you around" and “You hold hope” to me?? Anyway I think Shou has a habit of showing genuine appreciation and love for Ritsu that leaves him confused every time about what it means <3 (I rambled more about this in the tag if you are curious hshhs)
Thank you Bones for giving them opposite torn sleeves so they can make a completed set when they are together 🙏
#mob psycho 100#mp100#ritshou#shouritsu#kageyama ritsu#suzuki shou#mp100 fanart#myart#couple sleeves <3#and then Ritsu concludes it as probably just a thing friends do#<- he has never had any friend of his own#tbf Shou doesn't think much about the implication of his words too#like he just appreciates and loves Ritsu so much that his word go out on its own because it feels right and he wants to say it#idk I will think about if this makes sense and change it later maybe#wait I just realized my rambles aren't really related to the drawing uhm#sorry I got lost in my love for them#was talking more about how he is so quick to show his appreciation for Ritsu in canon#the this guy holds hope is from a diagram on a magazine from season 2#I'm glad to have you around is from season 2#before Ritsu fight Shimazaki#I didn't even check I just literally remember it so clearly sob I'm crazy about shouritsu </3#I just checked and put the diagram one in the caption for anyone curious#I miss drawing and posting them aauugghhh#I have had this idea out in my sketchbook since 2019#but I didn't really like how it looked#redrew it a bunch of time and now we are here!#crazy to look back at its old versions and see how much it changed
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was having a 'meh' kind of day, so decided to just chill, play video games, work on some gifs
and as i was editing a gif, this sort of emptiness crept up on me and i just sat there like 'why am i even making this'
#life#genuinely realized that gif making went from a way to express myself and my ideas#to just uh.. a habit?#a lot of things i've been making in the past idk.. months? are mostly because i wanted to honour my ideas#i just have so so so many but it's like#it doesn't really feel rewarding#i guess it also comes from the fact that i want to be productive.. to feel like i'm not wasting my time#but maybe that's exactly what's wasting my time#i remember when i first quit tumblr i looked back at all the hundreds of gifs i've created#and how by the end of it it really didn't matter#people were stealing and reposting my stuff left and right on twitter on pinterest on uh.. was it weh*artit or whatever??#and i sort of thought to myself 'never again'#decided to focus on making things with more 'tangible' results if that makes any sense#and then hotd pulled me back in.. and then bg3 absolutely consumed my brain#and yet... we're back here again#how many of these 'oh it's just a bad day' do i have in me lmao#maybe i should go write 🤡
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when it's been so long since you've read a fic that you forget about it and you find it in the search tags and start reading it again
and it's great, if a little familiar, but you've read a lot of these sorts of fics bc you like this tag a lot, so you assume it's nothing
but then the deja vu starts adding up and you start to wonder
and then moments before the great big Plot Twist Reveal happens you're suddenly like ah hell this is the bloody sundial fic again isn't it
smh this has to be the fourth time yet
#not that I don't love that fic bc I do#but also this is quite funny to me#have I made this post already? I don't remember#mdzs fic#time travel fix it#I love that tag#iceberg tags under see all#bc sm of the fandoms I'm in have such messed-up backstories that it works#it's funny. like for the media that doesn't have as dark backstories ttfi doesn't really make sense (although time loop might!!)#mdzs and st go perfectly with it as does hp (ew)#pjo not as much bc the big bad stuff (for the most part) happens much further down the line in canon than in the first few chapters#like. b99 and idk descendants of the sun or haikyuu wouldn't really work#ik it doesn't HAVE TO but I've also noticed this trend where ttfi is more common in fandoms where it's somehow plausible by the magic syste#haikyuu just does not have that magic system lol (for example)#whereas jjk? maybe. aot? probably not physically/magically but it's got such a messy timeline that at this point why not honestly#tbf the second time I read that fic I did get legitimately surprised by the plot twist#pjo#percy jackson#stranger things#atla? maybe. like it would be weird but still sorta plausible using spirit shenanigans#hp and mdzs by way of their 'hard' magic system side - wards/arrays and the like#pjo by the gods ig?? so kinda like atla with the deus ex machina and not exactly soft nor hard side of their magic systems#cinematic universes? depends but for the marvel ones it's plausible for studio ghibli idek man for kpop music videos sometimes.#not tagging hp lol#terfs dni#like literally if you've made it this far down my notes already if you're a TERF please just fuck off or block me or smth#anyway anyone know about monsta x?#they have time travel literally baked into their concept so I bet there's time travel fix it tropes over in that fandom#I don't really touch rpf these days so idk#if you have any good recs you can argue for I'd be willing to try them ig?
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i will genuinely never understand my dad!!! and i feel guilty for being confused and angered by him!!!! i don't know what he wants and i doubt i ever will
i guess he's known that he's had cancer for over a month now but never told me. and i dont know if it's because he wanted me to reach out/pay attention to him, as he's done in the past or if he just didn't think to, or if it's some other third mysterious reason that i can't think up
we aren't close since he was rarely in my life but i feel like that's something you tell your kid.
and the only reason i found out is because i went to go check and see why he hadn't replied to my message about asking if he wanted to hang out for the thousandth time without getting a response
#[static]#he tells me 'kid im gonna change i miss you i love you we need to hang out more im sorry that i wasnt around'#and then when we try and make plans it's like pulling teeth to get him to follow through#and sure there's been a couple of times in my life where ive had to back out of plans with him but like .....#we're talking less times than i have fingers on one hand in 30 years lol meanwhile he disappears for years without a word regularly#i thought we got somewhere last year when i decided to reach out after i stopped talking to him#we're both adults and we're busy but i somehow manage to have regular scheduled dnd games with 4 other adults twice a month#and i cant get my biological father who claims to want to know me reply to a message#and i know i know i know he's got his own demons and battles but i s2g it's just Frustrating because i dont know what he wants from me#i dont fuck with indecision and i dont like not knowing where i stand with someone#i know that he wont reach out to people in hopes they 'care enough' about him to do it#but like dude .......... SHOW THAT YOU CARE ABOUT ME TOO WTF#i want to be unendingly compassionate to him since he's gotta figure out what he's gonna do regarding his throat cancer#but like ..... what am i supposed to do with this lmao he saw my message and didn't reply and maybe he's busy#but he also didnt reply to any of my other messages asking to make time to see each other#but then he called me this summer to see if i was in town when he was there (and i wasn't and it was out of the blue)#he also posted a lowkey transphobic comedy sketch on his page which is weird because that's not really his politics but also he's old#and i can just hear exactly what he'd say about it if i tried to even bring it up to him ever#idk what he wants from me but i sometimes think even he doesn't know#i think we missed our time to mend things into something that makes sense#anyways sorry for the vent into the void i just got new information and dealing with stuff about my dad is always difficult#i have rarely felt wanted by him and have never felt seen for who i am either
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#wait not rbing the post bc honestly i don't like stirring shit but. 'afag' is fucking awesome. afag kinda fucks#first impression anyway first feelings about it LMFAOO LIKE. a lot to be said about assigned gender at birth language#and how it only serves to uphold an oppressive status quo and also i always really don't like to hear#like. the sentiment that transmascs/men will 'fall back' on their agab to absolve themselves of anything#like... i esp have a hard time w it bc i have zero hint of woman in me. i got a funky presentation but an absolutely set in stone gender.#so like. those sentiments are esp bitter in my mouth bc like. that is the last thing i would ever want to fucking do.#but i do have an extremely complex relationship w my agab how i was raised and focally how i coped w it#maybe i'm misuing terms but i feel like 'socialization' language can be useful but ONLY. on that specific person's terms.#you shouldn't use it to 'make sense of' or describe someone else's experience.#and absolutely shouldn't be used to reinvent/reinforce the gender binary. that's stupid.#idk idk everybody who doesn't fit neatly into the cis status quo faces unique forms of bigotry based on whatever 'category' they 'slot into'#came free w being punished by a system that doesn't want you to exist the way you do.#any which way i do feel like an afag patch could serve cunt........... that's just how i feel atm though.#it does speak to me...
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just thinking about how there's no reality in which anyone but trump wins the presidency and wondering what america and the world is gonna look like when it's over
#maybe i'm selfish but i don't think putting this openly facist man is a good alternative like#idk it really doesn't make any sense to me when people say they're not voting for trump or biden#to prove a point i guess?#like you do realize the reality of the situation is that one of them becomes president right. like those are the two options.#we either have a country run by biden or by trump#i genuinely don't understand what people expect to achieve by letting trump win#like if you're one of these people please genuinely enlighten me about why you think not voting will help#how will it help palestinians?#am i just not getting something?#how will trump make lives better for palestinians?#if he would be an improvement over biden i would get it#but he's not like. he's more pro israel than biden is#i don't understand what the desired effect of not voting is#besides keeping your own conscience clear#idk i guess you can call me heartless and evil for saying biden is a better option than trump#when biden is himself a horrible and evil man#but i would like to know what you expect the next four years to look like
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lloyd saved the dad he got after transmigration from debt after kim suho lost his dad to debt, and rakiel saved the dad he got after transmigration from a stroke after lee han lost his dad to a stroke... parallels...
waiting to see what the twist on this novel is. what happened to og!rakiel that made someone with suspiciously appropriate abilities and trauma end up in his body. what twist of fate makes it so these people have the chance to save, if not the people they lost, the people they gained in their new lives.
but also i do think it's kinda funny how lloyd's conflict in with his parents was 'the count and countess are good people and i don't deserve to call them my parents even though i love them very much because they don't know i'm not their son' and right up until where i am in the novel rakiel's conflict with the emperor seems to be 'this bastard keeps wanting me to prove myself please i am so tired just help me out this time no don't be proud of me just let me help my patients dang it'
#hey i got an ask#Anonymous#tged#lloyd frontera#rakiel magentano#like they're similar but still completely different dynamics akjshdska#but i really want to see where this is going!!#i wonder if the difference is also that i get the feeling rakiel was older in his original life?? like he wasn't the same age as og!rakiel?#so he feels uncomfortable any time he thinks he's getting parented (which admittedly isn't very often the emperor is Harsh)#because he was already an adult. he'd graduated he'd opened his own clinic he had his own life when he died and got reincarnated#and meanwhile we don't get suho's age but he's still in college and he lost his parents as a young man in a very traumatizing way#so when he get isekai'd into lloyd's body who's maybe the same age as he is with parents who'd be around the same age as his own parents#and who are eager to reconnect with their son??? he's uncomfortable not because he doesn't want to receive their parenting but because#he thinks he doesn't deserve it#does that make any sense idk#crown prince sells medicine#cpsm
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are there any jewish orgs or synagogues hosting seders that are open to non members close to you? that’s the best recommendation i can think of
i’m sorry you’re in that situation though, that sucks
not that i'm aware of. maybe there are, but at this point i don't know of any, let alone if they won't be sold out (or prohibitively expensive to join) at this point
#my university doesn't really have any other jews so there's no hillel or chabad#other universities in the area do and would maybe take me if i reached out. but a. i don't know anyone so i'#i'd feel awkward showing up as a stranger#and b. those campuses are having. the usual antisemitism problems on them as of late. and i don't know if i feel entirely safe#if that makes sense#idk#at any rate the one synagogue i go to for HHDs doesn't seem to have a seder on their calendar so#that's about the only 'community' i've had any contact with here#and. no luck there...#sasha answers#anon
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woke up with the feeling that 'something has been irreversibly changed'
#just me hi#which doesn't make any sense because i didn't really do anything yesterday lol#but then i got hit with that very accepting 'so this must be' feeling so i have No idea what's going on with my internals hfvsfhaj#though i Have been feeling odd‚ maybe it's turned over#i dunno! feelings are like magic is so many ways#/maybe that's why people like to tie it to Actual magic. something physical#because it's a way to see it‚ to understand it‚ to prove to other people it's there#but real magic is very hard to understand and sometimes even to imitate and sometimes people don't like to see it at all#which is sad because it's so pretty‚ and when you feel it in like your actual Body it's wonderful#but it showed how Physically strong you were then you aren't being awful in some way. then you're Scary and Powerful#but that's just awful too. they don't realize it until someone awful does it but they forget everyone else is like that too#i'm having Just Woke Up thoughts bfhvsbhfv#i want to like. just Be but things are kinda complicated you know?#like magic..#lol!#//anyway#gotta finish this comic for REAL#truly really seriously !!#i'm almost done with the inks and i KNOW i can do it today i can do it i can do it !!#couldn't yesterday (idk why lol) but i Can today so i will :D#do i shall see you again soon! tooooodles
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you have an isekai story? can i read it somewhere?
one day, i hope! i'm currently attempting to get it trad-published, but if i don't have any success i'll self-publish. i've only been avoiding the self-publishing route thus far because you have to do so much of your own marketing and i'm pants at that.
#an agent mentioned to me that part of the difficulty i've been having is likely because it doesn't easily slot into a specific age bracket#which makes sense! and is fair! but i'm not entirely sure how to fix that#i've been pitching it as YA because the protagonist is a teenager but i don't know if it really feels like YA?#or at least it doesn't look like most of the stuff that's hot on the market right now#sighhhhh idk. maybe i'll get lucky and find an agent who wants to take a chance on it. we will see#also please feel free to ask me any questions you want about my writing projects lmao i luv to ramble
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talked to my mom about education again. mentioned dropping out. felt sad. downloaded renpy.
#maybe my therapist is right and i really do just have to. learn how to make games#i genuinely can't see myself graduating. i've never went to high school. i was slower than my classmates even in preschool.#i was like “haha idk maybe it'll get better after i graduate <3” and my therapist was like “do you really think something will change”#and i was like. damn.#idk. like i want my family to be proud but i also don't want to ruin my health.#and like. i want to do what i actually enjoy doing. i know im asking too much.#I WILL TAKE MY ANTIDEPRESSANTS LATER I PROMISE.#also my memory is really blurry lately and i think someone is co-fronting i apologize if what i say doesn't make any sense..#[ 💚 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐬 ]
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...
#so theres this terrible thing i do where i force myself to get up way too early and go into the lab before anyone else#bc i get overwhelmed when lots of ppl r around. its terrible bc if u do that over and over it kinda breaks ur brain#but there is something i like abt walking around while its still dark out and on ones on thr roads looking up at the stars and theyre all#haloed here bc theres actually moisture in thr air here. i feel. idk how i feel. more normal i guess. like neutral but in a negative way.#like i dont really care about anything. probably im just tired. i haven't been sleeping well. maybe its the birth control#which im still taking bc im too curious abt how my mood fluctuates when my hormones r controlled. or maybe its my mood. but ive been tired#and ive not been having fun. i just feel like im very no thoughts empty head. here's info do u have anything to say abt it? any observations#? no. no. cant read cant think cant talk in a way that makes may sense. what do we do abt it? i dunno. i dunno.#sleep maybe. stop taking the birth control maybe. talk to my councilor monday definitely. give her an insane rant abt how im definitely not#bipolar lol i think ive got a point. but i go back and forth idk. it doesn't really matter. i just find it interesting#sigh. remember when i had time to draw? remember when i wanted to draw? now im just tired#whatever. ill sleep and feel better. get my executives to function maybe. maybe. but probably not#i did cut off like 3 inches of hair on impulse. got that chin length depression haircut. classic#unrelated
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