#maybe someday it will be coherent
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*throws a dozen dress up clowns at your head* Character design!!! murder puppet apologism!!! chemicals turning frogs gay!!! its kero kero time!!!! i dont know how to type up a real bio so im just throwing tidbits fullspeed at your window and also partially me spitballing speghetti against the wall
✨ their name is kero pierrot ofc, and they are a funny little frog clown married to arlequino hehe. keeping with the theme of commedia dell'arte their name is based off the character of the pierrot (and it's also a pun on keroppi since theyre my favorite sanrio character waha)
✨ the Pierrot was a tragic and lovesick figure, portrayed as naïve but endearing, often hiding their true feelings behind their jokes, and was a popular choice for romantic artists
✨ kero is a widdle bit fucked up in the brain zone but its FIIINE just slap a coat of face paint on there and ur good 8) Do not perceive the crushing mental illness behind the curtain
✨ grew up in america ofc, came to japan for reasons that turned out to be highly fallible (they maybe trust people a little too easily), refuses 2 talk abt this, they are however lacking in places to stay and money to spend so start of everything theyre Struggling A Little
✨ at this point they arent even kero really just Person...pathetic sopping wet frog you find under a rock. they had a special interest in clownery but always sort of put those kinds of thoughts to the side as more of a silly daydream than a goal they could achieve
✨ a clown without its nose have you ever seen anything so sad
✨ they first see masaru and the rest of the nakamichi circus when they saw them perform their street show (starting here), they just happened to be in the park at the time, and it's honestly the first time kero has felt happy since they Arrived in japan
✨ magic of the circus
✨ they spend the next few weeks going to the park and sorta following the nakamichi circus around to see more of their street shows, they don't really have much else to do anyway, they might as well spend some time having fun watching a circus act
✨ they attend so many that they actually start getting recognized by some of the circus members, especially masaru and shirogane since theyre very Perceptive. not a lot of details on those thoughts currently but masaru probably does his Main Protag/Therapist thing and gets to know kero
✨ BUT the way they actually join the nakamichi circus is during the performers meetup (starting here), kero goes to see their show again, but then things start Going Very Wrong and masaru's left by himself with no one to perform with. Little guy problems
✨ they've seen how much masaru and the others have been working and struggling in the past weeks, improving their street show, their cooperation with each other, and even if masaru hadn't talked to them they couldn't stand seeing something that made them so happy go down in flames like this
✨ SO! they hop in with vilma naota and mitsuushi to save the act! they don't have circus training like them so they can't do any fancy acts, but kero knows how to improv and roll with the punches, so they play off of the others as second zanni to liven up the show
✨ after that, i think they'd try to slip away quietly (kind of cant believe they did that) but masaru goes after them and asks them to join the circus!
✨ he knows that they wanted to be a clown, and even without formal training, he thinks having a western style clown will help the nakamichi circus stand out from the crowd! (also a call back to this moment in the manga when they went to see the straw circus)
✨ this is when they actually introduce themselves as Kero Pierrot to the others. there is no other name only Clown
✨ this has been a lot of masaru talk so far sorry he's my little buddy inflicted with main character disease. also i dont get a chance to meet my husband until like chapter 380 so i gotta be doin smth in the mean time
✨ from here on, kero sticks with the nakamichi circus as their new home :) they already knew a lot about clowning, but they really throw themselves into studying it as best they can (usually by spending hours at a library computer since most don't really have a textbook on clowns) and also training with the other members to sorta expand their repertoire. they get a lot better at the classic clown skills, your juggling, your balloon animals, what have you, BUT they also start to learn the cyr wheel!
✨ kero and masaru bond over doing circus training together. i give him a little noogie.
✨ they become pretty close with ryouko and lise too !! i jus love all my circus family i get them to play board games with me
✨ Peaceful Life (Until Its Not)
✨ this post as already gotten so long (and also i wanna reread some parts of the manga to refresh my mindself) so at some point i will expand on kero's feelings irt masaru running away and narumi joining nakamichi circus, but theres a couple other important points i want to make :V
✨ kero sorta takes a back seat with the rest of the nakamichi gang until they show up at kuroga village
✨ Specifically they join lise heima and ryouko in going to mont-saint-michel to follow masaru (they are NOT!!! letting these children go off on their own to fight!!!!)
💕 this is when they meet arlequino hehe 💕
✨ they stay by ryouko's side while they fucking Book It form the shirogane-o, and that's when they run into arle
💕 sorry ryouko but I'M the one who smiles at him 💕
✨ i should make a separate post of the manga panels i'm def in. and/or rewrite the scene as a fic which i might do at some point but just wait
💕 anyway this post is long enough so all you have to know is we get married and now hes my malewife Arlequino Pierrot 💕
💕 tagging my karakuri buddies @dissonantyote @lameassboyfriend (i hope dats oke)
#this is UNGODLY long im so sowwy#this is just a long list of hand wavy ideas and vague shit but hey at least its kind of lore right#maybe someday it will be coherent#si; karakuri circus#selfship#selfshipping#self ship#self insert#frog croak#flash tw#for the blinkie
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I will never, ever be over the way Shepard and Kaidan are so comfortable in each other’s space. They don’t need dramatic declarations of love; the way they are just existing together in these intimate moments shows you just how much they adore each other. They’re literally soulmates 🥺
#mass effect#kaidan alenko#shenko#oc: tara shepard#otp: you make me feel human#female shepard#commander shepard#i love them i love them i love them#the way she touches his face in the last one#tilting his head up to kiss him#the utter adoration in his eyes oh my GOD they make me feral#will I ever be able to get my thoughts into a coherent meta#maybe someday idk
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I said this way back when but I do genuinely think Badboyhalo is one of the most authentically funny Minecraft streamers out there. I think we all joke about him for being a bit ridiculous but I don't think I've ever found another streamer who is so endlessly amusing. He's endearing, he's a menace, everyone wants him, everyone hates him. He's just like... the perfect specimen of a character that can entertain absolutely anyone. What a guy.
#qsmp#badboyhalo#i could makw a more coherent thing abt him and maybe someday I will but I genuinely respect that guy so much#cellu writes
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rip to the people who literally only just followed me this morning and then subsequently unfollowed me the very same day amidst my grief, honestly guys i don't even blame you 😂
#this made me laugh because i get it i'd unfollow me too maybe we'll meet again someday#some of you survived so thanks for that and i will get back to a somewhat coherent gif posting schedule i hope...
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i wanted to ramble about how much i love fes emukasa (like the outfits) together but in the middle of it i realized how stupid it sounds so now it's probably going to rot in my drafts for the rest of my life rip
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me trying to explain why i think mike is gay and is aware that he’s not in love with el cause he has feelings for someone else since atleast the end of season 3, but he also doesn’t know the feelings attached to the painting are will’s yet and he was consciously lying in the monologue by trying to follow what will told him in the van (giving el the courage to fight on by emphasizing her abilities as a superhero, something that makes her different and “better” apparently!) cause he thinks that’s the only way to save el...so the painting is a plot device for byler to get together (and mlvn bones cause it made mike misunderstand what el truly needed, leading to his words not being enough for el to win and save max in time) but not in the sense that mike fell in love with will’s feelings for him or the person behind the painting, just that it was used to show who’s always been the right person for mike based on compatibility and understanding and true unconditional love, and for him to realize that things aren’t hopeless and his feelings are requited once he finds out the full truth behind the painting cause without it he would’ve continued forcibly conforming due to societal expectations and pressure, and trapping himself in a loveless relationship because of his fear of losing el and hurting her
#so im finally coming out as a full fledged gay mike truther 🙏#but there are certain things im not in agreement with when it comes to how gay mike truthers commonly perceive the narrative#like mike figuring out will in the van scene...cause i dont think hes there just yet#hes still too wrapped up in low self worth to ever comprehend that someone loves him the way will does#but i do agree that he’s self aware of his own feelings for will and has been struggling/dealing with it#i think s5 will reveal all his internal conflicts surround it#so i dont think hes gonna have a “feelings realization” in s5 but rather come to terms with/accept said feelings#the reason i believe this is bc if s5 is when he’ll figure out his own feelings#i dont think there would be enough time to depict his internal struggles/conflicts with it#as a lot of people have said...it would look like mike realizes hes in love with will then just#immediately jumps into a relationship with him without any internal struggles in between#i dont think thats what theyre trying to convey storytelling wise#i have more thoughts on why i believe in gay mike now but i still dont know how to piece them together in a coherent analysis yet#maybe i’ll post about it someday but for now take this 👍#byler#byler analysis
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Thoughts on chidori and strega in general?
like most ppl, i love chidori so much & definitely a lot more than the other two… BUT! for a while now, jin has been growing on me… as for takaya, i never disliked him really but i didn’t particularly care for him. However… the stage play changed me … i definitely still dont love takaya or anything & maybe it’s something to do with behind the scenes and his actor, but after watching the play i like him a bit too lmfaooo
i think it interests me the most to see mitsurus interactions with strega, since they’re obviously her enemies and yet her family/grandpa is the reason they even exist. especially seeing her interact with takaya. sorry to bring up the stage play again but it rly got me when mitsuru got down on her hands and knees to apologize to takaya and jin… hit me in the chest like a bullet…
i find myself sort of separating chidori from them often, but i enjoy how they’re found family in their own fucked up kind of way. i understand that they Need her (as she’s their “navigator”) but i’ve always thought they did care about her. to an extent obviously, since takaya is very ready to just write her off the moment he sees she cares about junpei. i know the game isnt about strega and all, but id have liked to see jin and chidori interact more even despite the fact they both believe they owe takaya everything
omg i should also mention that i love the weird mutual respect strega and shinji have with each other. like they dont really bother each other, dont like each other, but they obviously talk to each other
#ask#p3ask#i dont think about strega enough to form a completely coherent thought#i definitely appreciate them & i actually enjoyed the content they got in reload#takaya “my coat is invisible to fools” sakaki#reload sort of went in one ear and out the other so i cant properly form a reload takaya thought off dome#but i will say i liked his odd obsession with minato#maybe someday i’ll sit down for reload again & be able to properly form a thought on reload strega#but for now… this
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Writing and suddenly realizing I have unwittingly established a coherent metaphor that ties several plotlines together thematically COMPLETELY by accident
#That's pretty much always how it is for me like any metaphors/other symbolic structures I set out with INTENTIONALLY usually end up being#shitty or irrelevant meanwhile stuff that just manifests on its own is actually coherent and solid#It's awesome. Love to share someday if I were not terminally self-conscious about writing#I think I'm like.... technically competent (not great but not bad) and maybe notably decent at being funny but any time I have to share#anything publicly it's like DON'T FUCKING LOOK AT ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#Creative writing classes were hell for me#I did share some stuff here on my prev account but it was straight up bad I'm better now
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The Dragons Of Sodor: Lore Drop
Recently got some more interest in this. So I'm dumping a bunch of lore notes here. Lol. @hkpika07, I got some Gordon Lore here if you look carefully. ;)
A couple quick things. 1) Diesel 10 is called Lord Draavil in this. And 2) The Diesels are called Clan Iron Hide. Also, the first lore drop is here, if you want to read.
Oh, and there's a lot of out of context stuff here, so if you have questions, feel free to ask. :)
#ttte#ttte gordon#ttte edward#ttte james#ttte thomas#ttte dragon au#ttte henry#ttte sonny#ttte rosie#ttte lady#ttte rusty#ttte rebecca#ttte percy#ttte victor#ttte diesel 10#ttte emily#Ugh. My notes are messy. Lol.😂#Apologies. This is just random stuff I have. Maybe I'll put together a more coherent post someday.
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ok one of the things that i really dislike about booktok and similar online book communities at least from like. my experience with them because i avoid them most of the time now. is the thing where there's one half that doesn't really care and is usually the "let people enjoy things" group and will read sjm and colleen hoover or like all of the popular problematic booktok books or whatever. and then there's the other side that is a lot better about reading diversely and social justice issues in general which is great in theory and certainly has a positive effect to whatever extent but like. it all seems so weird to me because the point of all of these communities doesn't seem to be to just like talk to other people about your love of a book or even use it as a public reading journal it mostly seems to be about having a platform. and then whatever book you read and talk about on your platform you're either endorsing or condemning. so at some point it just feels like a huge percentage of it is just virtue signaling? like i'm sorry but i'd rather talk to an sjm reader who checked acotar out from the library and can acknowledge that a lot of it is shitty while still enjoying it for the escapism or whatever than someone who's bought and read every single book on whatever booktok list of new releases by queer and bipoc authors and took nothing away from any of the books. like ok great thank you so much for that list of x type of books written by authors from x marginalized group can you actually tell me what the book is about and what you got from it or is the most meaningful thing about it to you the fact that you read it which means you can now recommend me a book written by an author from [insert marginalized group here]? and this isn't every single person who has one of those platforms like there are definitely people who genuinely care it just seems so widespread and it's so fucking weird. like i have personally tried to find representation for myself by looking at these lists and i'm disappointed almost every time because believe it or not! a book having representation doesn't make it good or make the representation good or make it something you would actually enjoy reading!
then also like. sure yes. half of the issue is that on an individual level people need to do more to support marginalized authors and read things outside of their experience because that is a thing you should do because obviously (though i don't think it's going to do much if you're not willing to develop the reading comprehension to actually take anything away from it). but also. publishing companies are absolutely horrible and from my understanding booktok certainly is not making it any better, especially for marginalized authors. authors should not have to be able to sell a persona on fucking tiktok and be conventionally attractive enough for people to watch your tiktoks to be able to get published. not every book should need to be consumable to a large audience and incorporate whatever fucking tiktok trope is currently trending to sell. and if you genuinely want to help marginalized authors and are building a platform for yourself in an online book community why the fuck are you promoting and partnering with and doing free marketing for deeply bigotted publishing companies that pose systemic barriers to marginalized authors that are arguably much more of a threat than some allocishet white girl at barnes and noble who only reads colleen hoover books. and i don't know what the solution to this is but jesus christ this is driving me insane. like oh? you read one of the three new releases x publishing company was willing to publish despite their quota on the number of books they're willing to publish each year with a protagonist from x marginalized group? and they even gave you a free copy?? to promote it for them!! for free?!? wow. congratulations. would you like a free sticker. that also promotes their publishing company. so you can do more free advertising for them. instead of them actually giving enough of a shit about marginalized authors to put effort into promoting them that goes beyond free advertising on fucking tiktok and like. a post that features authors from x marginalized group on their instagram once a year.
#lenore rant#someday i will maybe have a more coherent better phrased less ranty version of this but.
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there’s nothing wrong plot-wise with the horizon conversation actually. y’all are just babies who don’t understand kaidan’s character or the purpose of conflict in a story lol
#mass effect#kaidan alenko#fandom critical#tell me how tf you think Kaidan is supposed to react to his dead girlfriend/friend appearing out of the blue working with terrorists#tell me what tf you think Shepard could POSSIBLY say that would justify their actions to him/convince him to abandon the alliance#i’ll be waiting.#real life is messy. people miscommunicate and say the wrong things. they hurt each other and have to work to repair the damage.#that’s what makes a story INTERESTING. the CONFLICT#if you think he should just go AWOL (which is illegal btw) so he can kiss your Shepard’s ass 24/7 you can just say that.#and don’t get it twisted: this also applies to people who claim to love Kaidan but then read his motivations on horizon in the worst light#or throw the entire confrontation out of ‘tHeiR cAnOn’ bc it makes their Shepard’s tummy hurt :(#that’s the whole point l m a o anyway#maybe someday I’ll manage to turn my Horizon Thoughts into a coherent meta but for now: you all are Incorrect
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What is your current brain rot? What is itching the back of your brain but you just can’t write it out?
I would like to give a shout out to the Baki men because ideas for them usually come to me pretty easily. Sometimes I get in ruts with my Baki stories, as is prone to happen, but those ruts usually resolve themselves pretty quickly and for that I am very thankful. ✧˚·.*˚✦
HOWEVER. THAT IS NOT THE CASE FOR EVERY FANDOM. ᗜ˰ᗜ
Ever since I started reading Vinland Saga my mind has been consumed with thoughts of writing a reader x Askeladd story. I have the plot and progression and all that shit up in my brain but when I go to write it, it's just... so overwhelming. I know I just gotta devote the time, but I think I am still worn out after writing two longer fics that my brain is still cringing at the thought of truly having at it. ( ̄  ̄|| )
Anyway, he vexes and mocks me and it pisses me off. >:(
And if any of the rest of you are struggling (you included, miss Momo) with any writing issue BS know you got this and you are wonderful and that shit is gonna get written and be amazing regardless of if it is fighting you the whole damn time or not!!!
─=≡Σ((( つ•̀ω•́)つ LET'S GO!
Here's a visual representation of me rooting for you all, btw:
(__/) (_(\ (>。<)💦 ٩(•o• ) < you can do it! (ა🪨 ( )
#thank you for letting me mini rant lol#someday... I will get his story out#but who knows when my darlings (─.─||)#sometimes the hardest part is finding the time and energy to get it all down in a coherent matter ya know?#thats why fanfic authors and writers are all incredible and ILU all you all inspire me so much and keep me going <3#answers#...do I use to many kaomojis? maybe but that will also never stop me from using them heh heh heh ( ‾ʖ̫‾) they are my little friends
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i headcanon donnie as being a late talker who became a person who almost never shuts up(affectionate)
i think he started being proficient maybe a year or 2 before meeting april. im certain he designed his own AAC app that uses his own voice for days when he cant talk. and the family absolutely also has TSL too!
but i made this post about that episode where he gets frustrated that his brothers dont understand things like he does (i think Mind Meld was the name) and he throws crayons at the table and starts yelling and then mumbling about his brothers being 'dumbs-dumbs'. that scene distinctly reminds me of throwing 'tantrums'(sorry dont know what to call them? fits maybe? i dont look positively at them) in middle school about my classmates 'being stupid and not following rules'.
i dont look negatively on the scene (its more of just personal bad experience lol. this is why im in therapy). i in fact adore the autism rep so much! even tho donnie is someone w low empathy and im too-high empathy, i feel like ive never seen a character who i understand so well. this scene reminds me SO much of being frustrated that other kids didnt think like me and didnt care about the same things and etc. i use to throw anything, i use to scream and yell, i use to cry and stomp. everyone told me i had anger issues and i didnt think so at the time and im still not certain if it was just struggling to regulate emotionally. i think it was so cool to see donnie do the same there. i love the scenes that show that he struggles w emotional regulation (prolly especially since he struggles to recognize the emotions as well)
ANYWAY what this headcanon post was supposed to be about was that i think some of donnies first words that he repeated like echolalia was 'dumbs-dumb'. the way he kept muttering it in that scene reminds me of being too mad to speak and getting stuck w easy/familiar words. i can easily see a little donnie in the middle of diy speech therapy w splinter walking around and calling everything dumbdumbs.
#rottmnt#rottmnt donnie#boop.txt#autism#i should write an essay about him someday i think#i havent posted coherent hc posts in so damn long. maybe i should add the turtles to the old goog doc 🤔#autistic representation#tmnt#i shouldnalso write something about the ep where mikey tries to teach don how to treat shelldon better#and donnie says 'ah yes. feelings like 😋🥱🔥❄️#that was so good
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thinking about demon/angel crazy:b au. demon rinne, angel/fallen angel niki, ??? kohaku (demon hunter maybe??) and himeru is a demon pretending to be an angel (kaname is/was an angel)
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I didn’t want to talk about the reboot, because I don’t wanna sound like a hater, but unfortunately I didn’t like it. It was a mess of a story that tried to do too much all at once.
#i tried to like it but it’s Not Great#maybe someday i’ll write my thoughts on it in a coherent way but rn i just wanted to get this off my chest#i was excited to see elyon have a big role and i was left disappointed#and dont get me started on taranee cause im going to start biting
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here’s the thing. my experience of compulsory heterosexuality was based entirely around a childhood & adolescence ruled by doing what i was Supposed To. i was always too something to fit in—too young, too smart, too weird, but i didn’t know why. i didn’t know how to be whatever it was a girl was supposed to be at any given time. and i thought if i could just figure out what i was supposed to do and be, i could just do and be that and i would stop being so different and wrong. but i could never get it right and i didn’t know why. i chafed at every attempt to Do It Right. because i’m gay, because i’m weird, because i’m opinionated, whatever. but here was the common ground: teen tv. from my eldest sister’s early tweendom in the late 90s through my late teendom in the early 10s. that era??? that is a set of rules, a normalcy, a heterosexuality, that i never chafed at. i watch teen tv circa 1995-2010 and i feel exactly what i’m supposed to feel, without having to try. anyway, once i get some sleep i’ll be normal about felicity, i prommy
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