#maybe she isn’t dead but I have the feeling she is
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Kyra Cooney-Cross x Reader Part 4
The atmosphere at training was tense, even more so after your confrontation with Jonas. The promise of your return was overshadowed by the coach’s harsh words and his unsettling presence. You tried to shake off the dread as you prepared for practice, focusing on the support of your teammates, especially Kyra. But as soon as you stepped onto the field, you could feel Jonas’s eyes boring into you like daggers.
Midway through the session, you were engaged in a passing drill when you felt Jonas’s looming presence behind you. He called out to you sharply, “Hey! focus! You’re not just here to take up space.”
You turned, heart racing. “I am focused! I’m trying my best!” you replied, a mix of frustration and defensiveness creeping into your voice.
“Your best isn’t cutting it,” he snapped back, moving closer, his posture intimidating. “If you’re not ready to be back, maybe you should reconsider if you even belong here.”
The biting words stung, but before you could respond, Jonas stepped forward and shoved you—not hard enough to knock you down, but enough to rattle you. You stumbled back a couple of steps, shock coursing through you as you regained your footing.
“Jonas, you can’t just—” you started, but he cut you off, his expression darkening.
“Don’t push me. You think this is a game? If you can’t keep up, I’ll make the decision for you,” he threatened, his voice low and menacing. The tension hung heavy in the air, and you could feel your teammates’ eyes on you, unsure of how to react.
“Back off, Jonas,” a voice called out. It was Leah, stepping forward with an air of defiance. “You can’t treat her like that. This isn’t right.”
Jonas shot her a glare, but Leah stood her ground. “She’s been through enough. We all have. Don’t you dare think you can intimidate her into quitting.”
You felt a rush of gratitude toward Leah, but Jonas’s anger only seemed to intensify. “I’ll handle my players the way I see fit, Leah. If you don’t like it, maybe you should think about where you stand as well.”
A chill ran down your spine at his threat. The confrontation left you feeling small, overwhelmed by the aggressive energy swirling around you. You turned away from Jonas, feeling a mix of anger and fear, and walked to the edge of the practice area, trying to collect your thoughts.
Team Bonding Night:
Later, after the intensity of practice had simmered down, the team gathered for Kyra’s planned bonding night at a cozy café downtown. The place was warm and inviting, with the smell of coffee wafting through the air, but the atmosphere was still charged with the events of the day.
As everyone settled in, you could feel the weight of the earlier confrontation hanging over you. The teammates chatted and laughed, but you found it hard to engage. You felt Kyra’s presence beside you, her hand slipping into yours under the table—a small gesture of comfort that calmed your racing heart.
After a few rounds of icebreaker games, Kyra stood up, her gaze sweeping across the room. “Hey everyone, can I have your attention for a minute?” she asked, her voice clear and strong.
The noise quieted down as all eyes turned to her. “I know this season has been tough for many of us, but I want to address something that happened in practice today.”
You felt your heart race again, but Kyra’s eyes found yours, giving you a nod of encouragement. “I want to talk about how Jonas has been treating [Your Name]. What happened today was unacceptable.”
A murmur of agreement rippled through the group, and Leah chimed in, her voice fierce. “He shouldn’t be pushing her around like that. It’s not right, and we all saw it. We’re a team, and we need to support each other.”
Alessia, sitting across the table, added, “Exactly! If he thinks he can intimidate [Your Name] into leaving, he’s dead wrong. We all need to stand together.”
The room buzzed with energy as more teammates voiced their support, expressing frustration over Jonas’s behavior. It was overwhelming but also incredibly uplifting to hear everyone rallying behind you.
“We need to figure out how to address this,” Kyra continued, her tone firm but compassionate. “We can’t let him get away with treating anyone like this, especially after everything [Your Name] has gone through.”
“What do you suggest?” Lotte asked, her brows furrowing in thought. “Do we go to management? He shouldn’t be allowed to get away with this.”
“I think we should bring it up collectively,” Leah suggested. “If we all go together, it will show that we’re serious about this. Jonas needs to know that he can’t bully us or anyone on this team.”
“I agree,” Kyra said. “We can’t allow him to manipulate the situation to his advantage. [Your Name] has every right to be here, and we need to support that.”
The energy in the room shifted, becoming something more powerful, a collective commitment to stand against the toxicity Jonas had created. You felt a swell of pride in your chest, realizing how much your teammates cared.
As the discussions continued, you excused yourself for a moment, needing to catch your breath. You stepped outside onto the patio, leaning against the cool railing as you stared into the distance. The stars twinkled overhead, and you felt a sense of peace settle over you—until Kyra stepped outside, joining you under the night sky.
“Hey,” she said softly, leaning beside you. “How are you holding up?”
You sighed, the tension of the day crashing down on you. “I’m just scared, Kyra. What if Jonas tries to push me out of the team? What if this doesn’t work?”
Kyra turned to face you fully, her expression serious. “He doesn’t have the power to dictate your worth. You’re strong, and you’ve proven that time and time again. Don’t let him intimidate you. We’re all behind you, and I’m going to make sure he knows he can’t get away with this.”
You looked into her eyes, feeling the strength radiating from her. “Thank you for being so supportive. I don’t know how I would get through this without you.”
Kyra stepped closer, the space between you shrinking as she placed her hand on your cheek. “You’re never alone in this, I promise.” Her thumb brushed against your skin, sending a rush of warmth through you.
In that moment, you felt an undeniable pull, and you leaned into her touch, your heart racing as she moved closer. “Kyra…”
And then she kissed you, her lips soft against yours, igniting a fire within you that chased away the lingering fears. The world around you faded as you melted into the kiss, savoring the moment, the connection, the comfort of knowing you weren’t alone.
When you finally pulled away, breathless, Kyra rested her forehead against yours, her eyes searching yours. “I care about you so much. I’m not going to let anything happen to you, I swear.”
You nodded, feeling a sense of hope blossom within you. “Together, then.”
“Together,” she echoed, a soft smile breaking across her face.
And with that, as you stood beneath the stars, you felt a renewed sense of strength. Whatever challenges lay ahead, you were ready to face them—because you weren’t just fighting for your place on the team; you were fighting for your future, your happiness, and the love that had grown between you and Kyra.
The team bond was stronger than ever, and you knew that together, you could take on Jonas and the uncertainty of the future, no matter how daunting it seemed.
#arsenal wfc#woso#arsenal#kyra cooney cross#woso x reader#alessia russo#leah williamson#vivianne miedema#lucy bronze x reader
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“Will my practicing demonolatry affect my loved ones and friends?”
This is one of the most common questions I hear from beginners, especially from those who are still in the broom closet and live with conservative or religious people. Will reaching out to Lucifer or Bune affect the people around you, either negatively or positively?
The simple answer is yes. The complicated answer is still yes but not in the way you think.
Although it is probably very possible, I’ve never had anyone close to me report having dreams about or seeing my demons/deities when I work with them. Your demons for the most part will not make their relationship with you known to outsiders. People have however, parroted direct quotes from my demons, or acted in accordance to what they say.
Is it a coincidence that my partner is suddenly obsessed with me and wants to be intimate after I invite Lilith or Astaroth into my space? Is it a coincidence that he suddenly wants to talk about music theory after Prince Cerberus asks me to study the power of sound?
When Leviathan tells me the winds are changing, and my partner absent mindedly says he feels like starting a new project, I can silently affirm that message.
Demons more often than not, communicate with us through our mundane lives. The people around you will not know that they are being used to deliver messages and lessons to you. My roommate isn’t aware that Lucifer is teaching me the power of empathy when she suddenly comes to me with her problems and needs a friendly ear or support. When I go to my altar and express to Lucifer that I feel ugly and unloved, and my boyfriend comes home with a bouquet of roses and tells me how beautiful I am, he doesn’t know that Lucifer is working through him, but I do.
Likewise, if my parent is being abusive or mean to me, I can’t say that my demons won’t cause some misfortune upon them. If my coworker is giving me a hard time, I won’t be too surprised if Lucifer reports that they’ve been fired or got demoted. The people who interact with you will be interacting with your demons as well, and because those demons are there to protect you first and foremost, it is very possible that those people will be seen as a threat or obstacle and dealt with or removed.
Sometimes demons give us adversaries to push us towards action. My boss being a major dick while quoting Belial: “If the work must be done, it should be done now”. Might just be the push I need to quit this dead end job and find something better. When that toxic family member is parroting every intrusive thought Lucifer told me not to listen to, maybe it’s time cut them off and find a better family.
Now, this doesn’t mean that you have to live in fear that every negative interaction you have with people will result in their lives being ruined. Demons aren’t here to destroy all of your relationships. But it also shouldn’t be too surprising when things do happen.
If you’re looking for signs that your demon is near you, pay attention to the subtle signs that show up through your interactions with others.
#luciferian witch#luciferism#luciferian#lucifer devotee#theistic luciferianism#lucifer deity#lord lucifer#pagan#paganism#demonology#demonolatry#goetia#goetic demons#demons#witchcraft#magick#occultism#grimoire#deity work#deity witchcraft
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America is turning into the Handmaids tale. That sentence has been thrown around a lot the past couple years and I think I’m actually starting to believe it. Are we gonna have to go full handmaids tale before you guys start to WAKE UP. What’s it’s going to take for you trump supporters to finally say I’m sorry you told me so to finally feel remorse?
is it?? Perhaps when all immigrants are deported? is it when queer people what? Reform? go to church camps? Get “cured?” or how about when all trans children have committed suicide? How about when every single indigenous person and families have been eradicated? When doctors life saving doctors are being arrested for performing medical procedures? When your diabetic grandmother can no longer afford her insulin because of inflation and she looses a limb?? A world where Palestine isn’t even on a map? how about getting rid of every single Jewish, Muslim non Christian person and religion because “Trump is for Jesus?” Or maybe when states like Florida and California are all underwater for not taking climate change seriously? How about all the black Americans that the cops will and HAVE turned their backs on and will continue doing so? How about when the grocery prices start going up so severely and the stock market crashes again and we will be forced to into another Depression?? When so many forced births are happening more children being born dead? More children being born of rape and incest being put into foster care and the influx of children going into foster care with no where to go and no family. When all the black women you know go missing? When gun violence is so out of control people don’t even feel safe leaving their own houses or going to work or children going to school? What is it going to take for you people to feel empathy? To feel bad about what’ve you’ve done. To feel regret.
I’m going to compare it personally because it seems the only CHANCE of yall feeling remorse is when it has to be affecting you, personally.
when your own happily pregnant daughter has a miscarriage and she’s charged with second degree murder? And her doctor is arrested.
when your five year old son gets shot and killed by a new gun law YOU voted
when your child is going through a vitamin deficiency for your inability to pay for groceries and they start loosing teeth?
When your daughters rapist gets child support
when your retired elderly parents are forced to start working again because of the housing crisis
what needs to happen for yall to wake up and realize what will happen or at the very least what COULD happen.
(I’m sorry with how vulgar and blunt this post is but I just can’t help put it out there HOW and WHAT could happen without pg-ing it sanitizing it better for them to consume and be comfortable with reading. I don’t give a shit, be uncomfortable)
#kamala 2024#donald trump#us politics#destiel#2024 election#november 5th#election 2024#presidential election#american elections
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𝓓𝓪𝔂 7
𝓓𝓪𝔂 8
ⁿⁱᵏᵒˡᵃⁱ/ᵖʳⁱᶜᵉ ˣ ʳᵉᵃᵈᵉʳ
Info: Fem!Reader, cussing, probably shit but I’m trying to get everyone introduced by day 10 so then I can start all the fun chapters so please bear with me
———👗 🛍️ ———
The next few days pass by in a blur. Lots of medicine induced sleep made it feel like a second in your life rather than 72 hours stuck in the same bed. The nurses were obviously upset with your trying to leave while not being discharged but they didn’t say much. At least not to you but you did hear some murmuring behinds closed doors between Gaz and them so maybe something was said. That’s didn’t matter much now seeing as you’re finally free to hobble your way back onto base.
You insisted you get yourself back alone after being discharged, much to the disappointment of your seven new and self identified “besties” as Soap said. They didn’t like the idea of you walking around alone and obviously injured but it was only a mile and half away so they couldn’t come up with any good reasons to stop you.
The walk back to the base was a welcome distraction, save for the stares you got of course. The hospital was practically in the bases backyard, separated by a Main Street sort of situation. Little shops lined the street with displays of different items catching your eyes as you passed.
Laughing families and cuddling couples surrounded you as you walked. It was 6pm on a Saturday so it’s not a surprising crowd. You watch a little girl with pigtails sprints into the local pet store, much to her parent’s dismay and chuckle as they chase her.
You pause your walk as you look across the street, an open sigh sits in the window of your favorite vintage clothing store. They typically close at 4 so you have no idea why they’re open now, but you aren’t going to question it.
Cool air snacks your face as you push the door open and greet the store owner. It takes a couple minutes to explain the unfortunate history behind your injuries but she eventually concedes when you tell her you just got out of the hospital and are doing a-ok.
When you ask, she lets you know that’s it’s the monthly family night where all the stores stay open so that military families can go and shop around together. Almost every store and restaurant stays open till 11pm so you’re told to go crazy and try-on as many things on as you want.
Twenty items later you finally check out, purchasing the two dresses, pants, and sweater that you liked. It’s nearing 10pm as you resume your way back home. Almost all the families with kids have already left for the night but there’s still some eating at the restaurants in the open air.
You can finally see the base past all the buildings as you stand, waiting for the signal to cross the road. It finally turns green and right as you’re about to cross and car screeches to a halt 5ft in-front of you. The glare melts off your face as you make eye contact with the driver of said car. Captain Price. And he looks pissed the fuck off.
The sounds of locks clicking and his glare tells you enough, so you climb into the back seat. He waits for you to buckle before driving off towards the base. Now that you’re in the car you also notice a man in the passenger seat, another new man. This man though, isn’t wearing a mask and looks quite nice.
‘We thought’ you wer’ dead.’
‘Why would I be dead? All I was doing was shoppin-‘
‘It’s almos’ 11 at nigh’ and you wer’ discharged at 5:30. So nearly 6 hour’ without any sign of you when the walk was less than 2 miles. Tha’s why.’
‘I was just shopping, maybe if someone tried to call me then I could have to you that Mr.Price. It’s not my fault non of your-‘
‘Ꭵ’Ꮄ ᎤᏬᎥᏖ ᏇᏂᎥᏝᏋ Ꭵ ᏇᏗᏕ ᏗᏂᏋᏗᎴ ᎥᎦ Ꭵ ᏇᏋᏒᏋ ᎩᎧᏬ ᏦᏒᏗᏕᎧᏖᏦᏗ. ᏁᎧ ᎷᏗᏖᏖᏋᏒ ᏇᏂᏗᏖ ᎩᎧᏬ ᏕᏗᎩ, ᎩᎧᏬ ᏇᎧᏁ’Ꮦ ᏇᎥᏁ.’
‘Accordin’ to Soap, she has a hard time understanding accents. Maybe-‘
‘That fucking narc! Who else did he tell about it? I was doing perfectly fucking fine when it was just Gaz and Chase that knew. Now it’s everyone’s fucking business?? What an assholse! I can’t bel-‘
‘ᎧᏦ ᏦᏒᏗᏕᎧᏖᏦᏗ, ᏂᏋ ፈᏝᏋᏗᏒᏝᎩ ᎴᎥᎴᏁ’Ꮦ ᏖᏋᏝᏝ ᏋᏉᏋᏒᎩᎧᏁᏋ ᏰᏋፈᏗᏬᏕᏋ ᏖᏂᎥᏕ ᎥᏕ ᏖᏂᏋ ᎦᎥᏒᏕᏖ Ꭵ’Ꮇ ᏂᏋᏗᏒᎥᏁᎶ ᎧᎦ ᎥᏖ.’
The glare you send him is deadly but it also says “what the fuck did you just say?”
‘Ꭵ ᏕᏗᎥᎴ, ҭᾄќἔ ᾄ в︎ʀἔᾄҭђ︎, ђ︎ἔ’ṩ ῥʀὄв︎ᾄв︎ł︎ẏ ὄᾗł︎ẏ ҭὄł︎ḋ ᾄ ғἔᾧ ῥἔὄῥł︎ἔ ṩὄ ḋὄᾗ’ҭ ᾧὄʀʀẏ ҭὄὄ м︎ὗƈђ︎. Ṃᾄẏв︎ἔ ҭʀẏ ҭὄᾗἷᾗʛ ḋὄᾧᾗ ҭђ︎ἔ ƈὗṩṩἷᾗʛ ᾧђ︎ἷł︎ἔ ẏὄὗ’ʀἔ ᾄҭ ἷҭ, м︎ᾄќἔṩ ẏὄὗ ł︎ὄὄќ ł︎ἷќἔ ᾄ ḋἔł︎ἷᾗqὗἔᾗҭ ᾧἷҭђ︎ ҭђ︎ἔ в︎ʀὗἷṩἔṩ ᾄᾗḋ ᾄł︎ł︎.’
‘Oh I fucking look like a delinquent do I? Welllll pardon me-‘
The radio goes up in volume as Price rolls his eyes. This 2 minute drive is starting to feel a hell of a lot longer.
———👗 🛍️ ———
Hope yall enjoy!
#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x fem!reader#poly 141#cod x reader#nikolai x reader#cod nikolai#cod price#john price x reader#kyle gaz x reader#gaz cod
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A character I deeply hate in *Game of Thrones* and *A Song of Ice and Fire* isn’t Daenerys, nor Cersei, nor even Sansa (and that’s saying something, as she annoys me quite a bit). No, the character I truly despise is Robert Baratheon.
Robert embodies all the traits that make me think: "I hate men" or "Men disgust me." His entire personality revolves around being a womaniser, a drunk, an overweight man obsessed with the ghost of a dead woman. Lyanna Stark has been in her grave for nearly twenty years, and she still can’t rest in peace because of his sick fixation.
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. While Robert wasn’t the mastermind of the Rebellion, he was certainly the one who fuelled it. He didn’t do it for the good of the realm or out of any sense of justice; he did it because he couldn’t accept that maybe Lyanna didn’t want to marry him. She preferred to be another man’s lover rather than his wife, and instead of accepting that, he unleashed a war. Lyanna, though raised as a noble lady of the North, had a will of iron and wouldn’t have allowed herself to be kidnapped without a fight (not that she really had a chance to avoid it—after all, she was a fifteen or sixteen-year-old girl facing Rhaegar, a twenty-four-year-old trained warrior—but I think you get my point).
And let’s not even talk about his reaction to the murder and rape of Elia Martell and her children. Robert laughed cruelly when he heard that innocent children, some barely toddlers, had been brutally killed and celebrated that a helpless woman had been raped and murdered. He was happy about it.
Of course, I’m not idealising characters like Lyanna, Elia, or Rhaegar. We can’t sanctify or demonise them because we don’t truly know them. Everything we know about them is filtered through the perspectives of others, some positive, some negative. They’re “told” characters, like Lily and James Potter in Harry Potter, whose backstories depend entirely on others’ memories. But who do we actually know enough about? Robert Baratheon. We know he’s the kind of man who would order the murder of a pregnant girl across the sea—a girl who’d already lost her family and home because of his rebellion. Robert did all this, not because Aerys was a tyrant, but because he was obsessed with the memory of a woman who never loved him.
As for his supposed "love" for Lyanna, he never showed any intention of respecting her, being faithful to her, or actually loving her. He was only in love with the idea of having a beautiful, strong, wild wife he could mould and subdue to his will. Before he was even engaged to Lyanna, he’d already fathered a bastard daughter; and only a few weeks after her death, he had Gendry. So much for his “great” love for Lyanna—he was already fathering children with other women within weeks.
What’s worse is that half the story seems determined to paint him as "the good guy." Give me a break. The realm didn’t entirely collapse during his reign only because of Tywin Lannister’s ambition and the competence of the royal council, who worked tirelessly to maintain stability. None of this was thanks to Robert Baratheon, who barely managed his responsibilities while the realm barely kept itself afloat despite him.
For all these reasons and more, I deeply hate Robert Baratheon.
Edit: I'll stand corrected, because a comment corrected me and they's right. The real hero who kept King Landing stable enough for there to still be a King Landing was Jon Arryn, that man deserved a raise and the biggest statue in the world, as well as putting up with his idiot king.
Edit 2: Re-reading my post, I realized that I made a somewhat fatphobic comment when I talked about Robert's physique and if anyone feels hurt, I truly apologize. I will not delete it, because it will be evident and give me a reason to improve, we are in constant deconstruction and I do not want to delete something bad that I could have said and pretend it never happened, how will I learn if I do that?
#game of thrones#a song of ice and fire#robert baratheon#lyanna stark#elia martell#rhaegar targaryen#I hate you Robert Baratheon#Nothing and no one will make me love you Robert Baratheon
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okay there’s like a million things my brain is latching to after finishing Nona but I just keep thinking about how goddamn tragic it is. all of these characters are tragedies of agency, of their struggles for agency and agency being ripped from them, of fates they did not ask or plan for. but Nona—Nona was this beautiful thing, this sliver between alecto’s soul and harrow’s body, and whatever bits of harrow and gideon’s souls that were left behind. Like everyone else in the book she is an amalgamation of bodies and souls that broke the meaning of living, but good lord she lived!! she loved!!! and all wanted at the end was to die as herself, and not the someone else who lived more like a shadow over her life, a promise of all too soon end. Nona was not Harrow. Nona was not Alecto. But she had to die in a space that was not her own, in a tomb for someone else, in a body for someone else
#nona the ninth#ntn#tlt#tlt spoilers#ntn spoilers#ANYWAY#maybe she isn’t dead but I have the feeling she is#idk I suppose it depends what that bit of soul that’s HERS is ya know#that piece she talked about as her middle brain#if that has its own soul at all#ACK and don’t even get me started on the tragedy of Pyrhha#who has gained so much family and loved so brilliantly and loses so fucking much of it#or sees it radically transformed behind recognition#because at least Paul also loves Harrow in their own deeply specific way#but Pyrhha loved Nona#and Palamedes#and Cam#and they’re all gone#and transformed#tamsyn muir you ruin me
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okay but once AGAIN: the Bennet sisters are not actually a united front, nor do they share a close bond. It’s shocking how divided and splintered they are (symptom of the house they grew up in.)
#I never stop beating this dead horse I’m so sorry.#but it’s just like. yeah that’s sweet that Rosamund pike enjoyed playing a bunch of sisters she was close to.#but literally …… not …… canon ……. behavior.#Lizzy and Jane are friends. Kitty and Lydia are inseparable.#when Lydia separates herself Kitty gets sort of adopted#and Mary is unfortunately the odd duck out#and that’s just the way it is. (also I refuse to feel false sympathy for Mary.) (a sentimentality beyond my powers or desire)!#‘I want to hear more about Mary Bennet! what’s her story!’ is an insane take to me#Mary is a silly (and stubborn in her silliness) side character. maybe she grows up one day maybe she doesn’t#it isn’t my business nor the readers#I do think it’s funny and yes a little cruel how Mr. Bennet insists on including her in his list of silly daughters#it’s a failing on his part. as is his disdain/amusement at any of his daughters#but you know WHAT. he isn’t wrong#Mary wished to say something sensible but knew not how Bennet is not a tortured side character with a lonely soul.#she’s a 19 year old in a very foolish stage#she’s also vain!#like girl. literally no one wants your concertos here#sorry you have such unhelpful parents but like …
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anyway shri’iia’s epilogue outfit which is a mix of 1900s male stage costumes and also that one camp outfit mod. look at the ring hehe 🤭
#it’s so whimsical I love it ….. the silhouette is based on the stage costumes#where they have like the cinched waist poofy bottoms and then stockings#but in her case it’s boots but she’s wearing these particular boots that I think fits with the whimsy elements the fit has#and the top is like a reconstructed coat but off the shoulders with the poofy sleeves bc I want to give her that rapunzel / tangled vibe#since her backstory was inspired by rapunzel ofc …!!!!#and it still has that sexy element drow fits are known to have … but this one isn’t like outright naked sexy it’s more of a teasing kind#which fits her..!! like this is her whole personality turned into an outfit I really like it 🤭🤭🤭🤭#and it’s the personality that she slowly regains when she becomes more genuine … and she’s finding herself more (via the oathbreaking route#unlike before the clothes she wore were like costumes bc she’s trying to project a certain image. now it’s her actual authentic self#character building through fashion and wear? maybe so!#as for the stage inspo I think her own style would lean that way bc a) she prob has been influenced by astarion who I think has a more#theatrical style and since she’s new to the fashion in the surface she’ll probably ask him a lot#b) it’s a whimsical style!! and fun!! very bard like tbh but I think that’s what she’ll end up liking. it��s different from the tight#fitting/see through/sleek outfits that drow fashion favours and I think she’ll want to experiment w a different style than she’s used to#and also as for the ring. it’s a promise ring hehehe I talked abt it before but I like the idea that at some point they give each other#promise rings bc marriage!!! or anything of the sort!!! feels too big and too daunting currently and they’re probably taking it slow like#they’re elves they have all the time in the world quite literally for him he’s a vampire but I like the idea they have something that#reminds them or gives them that possibility of like something more 👁️ and the promise rings are just that. also they probably stole the#rings or looted it off a dead body somewhere lmfao#anyway…… Some Thoughts. !
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Idk if this is controversial, but studying for a English/writing degree at university shouldn’t make you NOT want to engage with writing or literature. Just a thought.
#the amount of times one of my literature professors presented us with the worst reading or interpretation (some of which were just plain#revolting) of a piece of literature almost as if she were expecting us to like it just because it was sensational and me and everyone else#going ‘um. no. sorry. not only does that make no sense but now I kind of want to throw up’#I just came here to read some gothic lit and honestly I’m feeling so attacked right now. (my fault for signing up for gothic lit I suppose)#her English survey class made me never want to look at the written word again#however I know this isn’t me having an issue with survey classes (although the rate they make you read at is kind of ridiculous and I read#fast: case in point for one of them I had to read Huck Finn in 9 days)#because I took American Survey from another professor and it was really challenging but probably the best course I ever took at university#I was not expecting to develop such a distaste for the academic world at uni but maybe that’s just my university (whenever I complain about#this my mom always tells me I need to watch Dead Poet’s Society lol)#siggggghhh anyway. hoping for some better classes with my exchange program (although none of them are writing/English as I’m almost#finished with my degree)#english lit#university#english#college
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2 hour rough drawing of Ehuang, my precious Green Opal child who I don’t draw nearly enough <3
#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#original character#ehuang beifong#<— finally. a new OC with a proper tag#tbh it is much easier to tag characters who have last names#and we’ve never discussed it but I do think Ehuang carries the Beifong last name. whether or not she uses it is a different matter#I feel like she’s a Beifong officially she never puts much emphasis on it. she prefers the other side of her family anyway#okay moving on from that#next gens for next gens. quite a deep niche in reaching here#but I don’t care. I love Ehuang as a representation of everything good and pure in the world too much to object to her existence#baby girl. sweet girl#and yeah I’ve drawn her with Midori Opal and Suiren before so I thought I’d try something else#and while Kuvira isn’t actually shown here. just know that she’s absolutely tearing up off screen#you can pull the idea of Kuvira absolutely adoring her little niece out of my cold dead hands#wait omg I never posted my earlier art of Ehuang on here have I#okay once I’m done with my current projects I’ll refine and post those#the world deserves to see more of Ehuang#I feel like this particular scenario also hits some spot in Kuvira bc she knows who Ehuang’s bio dad is#and Ehuang looks just enough like him. despite being very similar to Midori. that imagining her with a beauty mark under her eye…#it brings Certain Ideas to mind. very fleeting and eliciting a ‘imagine that. I love this girl to bits but I’m sure glad I’m not her mom’#kind of response. but overall no one really lingers on that fact. I feel. her parents are Midori and Opal#Bataar’s just the donor. no one calls him her bio dad. he doesn’t see her as his daughter. probs Suyin is the only one who puts up a fuss#like not letting up about Ehuang being his kid even though he’s told her countless times that his involvement is irrelevant#he doesn’t wish to be ehuang’s dad. that wasn’t why he helped create her.#he did so because he loves his sister and SIL. because he knew they wanted a baby. not because he wanted a child himself#he’s quite content being her uncle thank you very much. and idk why I just went on this ramble lmao#maybe I should try to write something Ehuang related. explore all these relationships and whatever. we’ll see
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babbling about potential fragaria memories worldbuilding (of course, it is made up <3)
Essentially, the concept of a “castle” is a kingdom’s lifeblood and creates the entire kingdom in the first place. It originates from the “Lord” who creates the castle and shares both a physical and mental connection to the Lord.
(The castle creates the castle itself and is a literal and symbolic heart of the kingdom) (Potentially creates the walls that protect/surround the kingdom, and might have the power to erect entire buildings) (Technically, a castle can expand its borders but expending too much power might strain the lord who creates the castle(?)) (Can only create buildings within the boundary of the walls)
(I like the idea that SEEDs are naturally attracted to castles because of the high density of magic surrounding these areas(?)) But also because the existence of a lord is essential to the kingdoms since they’re highly exalted and revered, taking them down would mean taking down the whole kingdom.
If the lord is damaged in any way, the castle itself will be vulnerable to attacks depending on the severity.
Relying on the idea that magic doesn’t come naturally to faeries (or whatever the people in fragaria are), I describe it as more “communal” if that makes sense? Castles provide unlimited magic to all citizens for public and daily use. Everyone has access to magic but is limited if too many are using magic at the same time. Communal magic can only be used within the bounds of the kingdom.
Using communal magic in an attempt to harm the castle is possible, but barely damages the castle. I imagine foreign magic or attacks by SEEDs are the only ways of directly harming the castle without attacking the Lord themselves(?)
Maybe the idea of “communal magic” can only be used through special wands(?)
If a castle undergoes damage, it can heal but requires the concentration of the lord to perform the healing.
Alternatively, everyone can use magic but has a limited use of it per month. The wand thing still applies. (Perhaps you can buy extra chargers for magic, but maybe it is a bit costly(?)) (Technically you can probably hoard magic, but maybe a heavy tax is placed to prevent people from hoarding magic(?)) (<- I kinda forgot, but I remember the initial idea was that hoarding magic is bad since it is considered a precious source and it would be preferred if it can be used for more important and practical matters rather than being stored and saved up(?))
Technically “communal magic” comes from the lord but are still vulnerable to others using their power against them(?)
(i like the idea of castles being a physical and mental representation of the lord)
(something similar to brainless witch but less depressing) (…or would it be just as depressing?)
(creating a castle doesn’t require a constant maintenance of power, but for things like “communal magic,” it does)
(i like to think of castles as an extension of the lords)
Knights of Fragaria require a lot of power to form contracts and may deplete the kingdom’s defenses. They’re considered great assets for their loyalty and ability to act around as they please. Unlike normal faeries, they’ve been granted the ability to use magic as they please and more capable than the average faerie. It can be risky to have two knights of fragaria since it may endanger the defenses of the kingdom.
(Maybe Knights of Fragaria have an intrinsic connection to their lords and the castle themselves(?))
(I find it more instinctive rather than all-knowing(?))
A SEED that takes over a castle will absorb immense magic power for their own and may become unstoppable. Their abilities are heighten but are bound within the castle until it stops possession for whatever reason. A SEED possessing a castle may also strengthen SEEDs within the vicinity and birth new SEEDs. (Maybe they drain the castle themselves until it disappears for good(?))
“Purification” is the magical defeat against a SEED.
“Banishment” is the physical defeat against a SEED.
Music is something culturally significant in the world of Fragaria, especially during the SEEDs crisis. I might not explain this idea well, but imagine playing songs and trying to soothe a loved one while trying to remove the SEED from them? Even melancholic music being used to attract SEEDs.
Imagine singing being an important song to a loved one, hoping they turn back to normal? or maybe this is just me trying to make the fragaria memories music videos have lore significance aha
Maybe I haven’t seen a lot of others write about lore, but have you ever thought about the implications of forgetting someone because of a SEED?
Imagine looking at old photos, but suddenly recognizing someone you once knew as a stranger? Imagine having decorated rooms meant for someone, but not remembering who these rooms are for? Imagine finding old letters and notes you’ve lovingly written to others or have been written to, but not knowing the context or the people behind these letters.
Imagine someone sacrificing themselves under the brave act of protecting people from SEEDs but only to be forgotten.
What is the pain of wanting to desperately remember someone? Do you even want to remember anyway? Should we forget the people we can’t even remember? Maybe there are memorials or murals that honor these people, how would kingdoms honor those who are forgotten?
Maybe they don’t in the first place? Who knows?
But I’m more curious about the nature of SEEDs themselves? Are they a species that is controlled or are they animalistic and feed off a person’s negative energy for survival?
Do SEEDs have some level of intelligence? If they do, I imagine it isn’t too comparable to a human’s. I feel like it’s similar to the demons in Frieren in the Funeral(?)
In my opinion, I think SEEDs can discern if emotions are “negative” but are unable to truly understand the essence of negative emotions. They see it as a source of food. I mentioned melancholic music as bait for SEEDs, but I wonder about the idea of "manufactured negativity," if that makes sense? Imagine the sounds of crying children being used to attract SEEDs themselves. Imagine trying to purposefully invoke the saddest moments in life just to see if you can use that negative energy to attract a SEED?
I find it more meaningful that SEEDs have always existed as a consequence of the world. In Twisted Wonderland, using magic produces a pollution known as blot. But if Fragaria Memories was once a world that relied on magic but never thought of the consequences of producing its own blot?
So basically: "SEEDs are the consequence of using magic."
what if SEEDs is like the original sin if you get me...?
What was the world like before the arrival of the Strawberry King? Before the idea of lords and their kingdoms existed?
#fragaria memories#you don’t have to read the tags this is just me rambling to myself as i compare fragaria memories to other media…#in a good way i have a lot of things to love about fragaria memories especially tuxam#i love brainless witch the protagonist literally removes her brain in order to not feel sad anymore#but she also has to eat her brain i think but it regenerates(?)#these aren’t really big spoilers but i recommend reading it if you’re ready to read a depressing story#i think the fun thing about writing is trying to relate it to other stories and making up your own ideas#like a lot of this reminds me of blot in twisted wonderland or the rukh in magi the labyrinth of magic#i think its more fun to think how such ideas can be twisted and used#imagination is a purely beautiful thing isn’t it? i get to think about the useless and the useful#what a blast… i get to daydream in a lonely world and isn’t this fun?#but like how come no one has thought about kingdom hearts heartless/shadow parallels with SEEDs its right there#maybe someone has but im relying on what i see on social media like tumblr or twitter#imagine SEEDs swarming around a dead body like maggots to a corpse#ill see myself out
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also regis swearing at stygga is so meaningful to me because he swore over milva’s dead body and also in front of angoulême (and assumedly cahir too)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#txt#especially because milva was like… not only his friend but he cared for her medically…#i mean he did for everyone (including cahir and dandelion’s head injuries) but#idk regis seeing her dead when he had saved her life under the bridge and counselled her about pregnancy and abortion#and (i guess it’s headcanon but) when her ribs were broken by the druids and she was healing from that he was there for her#milva was beat up by the narrative but regis was always there with bandages lol#so to see her DEAD completely DEAD with no possibility of healing her#also because *he was off* and he paused for a drink (or two—who knows how many)#of course he’s like ‘fuck this place. i’m going to fuck this shit up’ because how shitty of a surgeon must he feel right now#and if he can’t protect his friends now with medicine well the only other option in his arsenal is Fucking Shit Up#his NOSEDIVE begins early in the halls of stygga castle and he just starts losing it#milva: dies | me: oh… oh they’re *all* gonna die huh…#who knows if regis had returned to the rest of the company and milva was still alive. who knows. maybe he wouldn’t have continued to drink#and maybe he wouldn’t have made that suicidal leap towards vilgefortz in the end#i think that in the loss of the rest of the company regis had nothing left to live for#both from an in-universe POV and from a narrative writing POV#because remember that there were previously written versions in which regis survived and lived#so paying attention to not just when he dies but when he starts to go on this downward trajectory is relevant#because sapkowski intentionally devised a way in which he would die that would be plausible for his character#which means that his death isn’t just random. this version was a specially crafted version to ‘allow’ for his death#i love how AS was like well yeah of course milva and cahir are going to die. but yeah i admit angouleme and regis are just stupid#(to clarify he said angouleme dies stupidly)#but i think saying ‘there were other versions in which the vampire survived’ = this is the version where he is stupid#c: regis#analysis#IN THE TAGS lol#book: lady of the lake
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much to consider about jordan not drinking alcohol but liking something in her hand. about her calling nick an accessory as well. therefore heavily implying her preference for woman and lack of romantic and sexual interest in men
and then after myrtle is killed and she invites nick in for a birthday drink, he says ‘you don’t drink’ and she replies ‘well maybe i should start!’
interesting
#while jordan isn’t explicitly a lesbian she does end up dancing w more fem presenting ensemble than masc so it’s a bit of an assumption#that plus the accessory line#so in this moment where she’s FRANTICALLY trying to hold it together (as narrator of the Old Money and parties and rumors and whatnot)#it feels like she’s grasping at anything stable. and she knows nick. and heterosexuality is safe#she saw a woman dead. nick said he’d explain to her earlier that day and im sure he did#she knows who myrtle is. she understands what happened even if she thinks gatsby was driving. she sees everything imploding#and a lot of it already had. she’s a bystander having fun and enabling people and taking advantage but she doesn’t want things CHANGING#nick come in and have a drink! he doesn’t want to hang out with these people anymore. what people. me? you? we’re just like them.#what is there to celebrate nick asks? there’s never BEEN anything to celebrate they’re just AT these parties#nick is trying to leave. maybe she wonders if she can keep things the same by being acceptably heterosexual#i don’t know i just suddenly found this very interesting it hasn’t marinated in my brain yet#not pjo#chitter chatter#all the worlds a stage#gaam#gonna go back and add this tag to all posts eventually
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Lmaoooo when the only characters you even vaguely like (Karen, Mickey and Doris) are all dead by the fifth ep so you already know you’re gonna hate the RT final episode
#everyone sucks this season#Austin is okay but I don’t feel anything particular about him#none of the villains have any charm#I hate literally everyone#maybe the chemist can sway me in the last ep cause I don’t have any pushed opinions on her#but harry. alma. Belle and Ursula can all just rot#epsieclaky the first two and Ursula#Belle sucks but she has a bit of charm thanks to the icon that is Frances Conroy#ahs#american horror story#ahs double feature#ahs red tide#also I know Doris technically isn’t dead but she’s as good as dead
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idk what to do here folks im out of colors
#have one for enjolras and that’s it 😭 i need one for grantaire and probably combeferre too#leigh reads les mis#actually blue might be free i was using it for fantine and then cosette but fantine is dead now obviously and cosette idk if she’s even in#this volume or if she is if it warrants her having a color dedicated to her#probably not? ushhrf#javert is purple and i think im going to double up on it w eponine since ik there are a lot of parallels btwn rhem#ig i should probably have a color for marius 😮💨 maybe i’ll add him to blue w cosette#but this still leaves nothing for grantaire and/or combeferre 😭#WAIT actually. i have a light pink i could use for one of them#it feels so wrong to not make grantaire green but green is for themes … altho i do have a second green highlighter that’s lighter so maybe#could work since the themes one is like. neon#jvj is bright orange and enjolras is a lighter orange and that seems to be working so#hot pink it for fave quotes and then yellow. technically isn’t anything specific but that’s mostly bc i know for a fact it will completely#fade so i don’t want to assign it anything of importance#okay ig. so blue for marius purple for eponine light orange for enjolras light green for grantaire and if combeferre sticks around in terms#of significance light pink for him#<- for all the new characters getting introduced#im a little iffy abt that tho bc the light orange and light pink are rlly similar and enjolras & combeferre are complements like that feels.#whatever i don’t want to think abt this anymore wtdjmg i’ll figure out combeferre later
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Do I have to start saying not that anyone would care in that super duper passive aggressive way to guilt people into caring or what
#dora daily#I’m so tired#the one thing I’ve consistently wanted since I was a kid was to be cared about and seen 😜#yet I can’t even seem to get that ☠️ I honest to god am so tired like every day is another futile attempt to try to engineer what I say#specifically for the purpose of me hoping someone ANYONE would care#how I used to be sick when I was younger because I saw that the kids who would get sick or would get sad would get sm care and love but#I was stupid because I didn’t account for the fact that when I was sick I had to just suck it up or when I was sad I need to stop being such#a crybaby and get over it#what if I say I’ve had enough of just being shamelessly used by others for me to comfort them through their problems#but I always have everything thrown back at my face because somehow when it’s my turn my problems are uncomfortable or awkward#I don’t have energy for a single thing yet I force myself to talk to at least one person and trying to fix my relationship with just#literally talking it shouldn’t be that hard but I feel so worthless that even speech is impossible and makes me feel like I will literally#die. it’s been working kinda but now I just can’t help but feel so sick to my stomach about all this my head hurts really bad and I’m trying#not to cry and trying my hardest to make peace with the fact that in truth nobody will ever like me enough to care at all ever#not my mum not my dad or my siblings and certainly not my friends either#I’m so tired of always begging and pleading for someone to just notice I’m here too#or maybe it’s specific people#it’s so cruel to say all those overly nice things to me and not act on them#why else was I so psychotic about that girl ? obviously because she would shower me with the nicest things I’ve ever heard#but she says that to everyone she’s not consistent with me and we aren’t really friends#ik it wasn’t her intention but it doesn’t change the fact I have wanted to and I’m not even over exaggerating but actually off myself#because this is just proof I’m around to serve people’s dirty work and clean messes when I can’t even stand on my two feet anyways#isn’t it so stupid I’m just talking to myself here and most likely nobody will ever see it meaning this was just useless yet again#and the fact i can’t be free ever nor can i do anything about this to permanently end things because i am a coward and because the worst#part is that even after death I shall be tormented anyways#and let’s say I somehow survive an attempt I will literally be scarred for life and then I’d rlly want to be dead#it’s the way not even death can be a solace for this because there would only be more torture#I can’t leave this religion because leaving won’t change the truth but I’m so tired and worn thin of every single responsibility in my life#even tho I don’t have much the few I do have feel excruciating#life is too much and death is worse so why couldn’t my mum who’s strong willed said no to my dads family and not gotten married period 🧍♀️
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