#maybe it isn't cheap
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okay so after Tales of the Jedi we're getting Tales of the Empire and on a complete non-squitur, in TBB episode 3x10 Hemlock says the other operatives aren't ready yet, which means there're more clone assassins in the making my bet is still on clone x (or the current assassin clone or whatever you call him) being Tech, because him being Cody just wouldn't be the same, it wouldn't be as emotionally devastating for Omega and the Bad Batch as the clone being Tech would be and I saw a theory that maybe Cody is one of the other operatives whose brainwashing just isn't done yet instead so hear me out, hear me out after Tales of the Empire, we could get Tales of the Clones, right? and in Tales of the Clones we could get the story of what happened to Cody, that maybe Cody tried to escape the Empire in TBB 2x03, but he was caught and sent to Hemlock's sick assassin clone program, but the badass he is he's resisting the brainwashing and he maybe escapes??? MAYBE WE COULD GET THAT STORY OR SOMETHING??? WHERE HE ENDS UP ON TATOOINE LIKE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO IN THE OG KENOBI SHOW SCRIPT???? I'D BE SO UP FOR IT OKAY???
#tbb s3 spoilers#tbb spoilers#tales of the empire#tales of the jedi#tales of the clones#MAYBE#star wars#give me tales of the clones#they deserve their own season#if we're going with jedi and the empire for now#they should be next RIGHT??#PLEASE I'm begging you to give Cody his own proper story#he's such a beloved character by the fans and he deserves as much hype and love from the show creators as Rex gets#at least he deserves his own story where he's not just a sidekick or used for someone else's character growth#if he dies in TBB s3 it's for cheap shockvalue and to advance the plot or the bad batch's character growths and I'll fucking scream#because that would be such a waste for such a great beloved character#commander cody#the og Kenobi show script is my Roman Empire#even if there isn't a story about Cody just give me tales of the clones anyway#I need all the clone content in my life#text post#I'm rambling#but I have a lot of feelings about Cody#tatooine husbands maybe?
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dishes are forever
#I MISSED HAVING A TABLET!!!!#ht papyrus#a gentle touch when you're sad#a menacing touch when it would be funny#he can do it all#LITTLE PRO TIP LIFE HACK THOUGH: IF WASHING DISHES MAKES YOU WANT TO LIVE ON A DIFFERENT PLANET#MAYBE YOU HAVE TOO MANY DANG DISHES#BEING IN A SITUATION WHERE I HAVE 80% FEWER DISHES THAN BEFORE MEANS I DO DISHES MORE OFTEN BUT IT'S SO EASY#AND NOT SOUL SUCKING AT ALL#JUST MY EXPERIENCE!!!!!! THAT'S ALL#I'm sure when i am reunited with my other dishes i will languish in bed staring at this psyching myself up to the task#but i like keeping random jars from food i bought and dishes that i picked up in different places.#they physically remind me of everywhere I've been and sometimes i just look at them and remember where I've been#my favorite is the old ratatouille jar i bought at carrefour in Chengdu#that jarred ratatouille was the nastiest food to grace this earth#i bought it in case it would make a quick easy meal (you don't really find those at the grocery store in China at least not back then)#but even my cheap lazy self couldn't eat it#so no one ever consumed that ratatouille but the jar was pretty big so i put other stuff in it and now it's my dish#and somehow the label is glued on PERMANENTLY it has never washed off after all these years#actually idk maybe it eventually did it isn't here for me to look at but it lasted a long time i know that
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Listen I can't make a coherent point rn for various reasons but the fact that Trump picked out Haitian immigrants in particular rings SEVERAL alarm bells in my head going back to the 80s and I am aware that that's bc I did more AIDS research than the average person but. The "original" 4H of "AIDS transmitters" were "Hookers", ""Homosexuals", "Heroin users" and "Haitians". I feel picking out Haitian immigrants for his scaremongering and lying seems sort of random to many but Trump remembers the 80s and a lot of voters remember the 80s and he is re-hashing old talking points from AIDS, which should be worrying because the stigma formed back then is STILL carrying into so many aspects of life.
#man this isn't a coherent string#maybe i am missing important cultural knowledge.#but i know my 4h when i see them#historically the logic was AIDS is from Africa so are Haitians so they got it there and then gays go there to have cheap sex and bring it#back to the US or Haitians immigrate#it's a worrying and powerful combination of racism and homophobia (+ transphobia)#ok done with whatever this is
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do you have any thoughts on the story of abraham and isaac? my parents talk about it and praise abraham for being willing to kill his son which..... scares me to say the least, and i'd love to hear your perspective as someone who seems more well-adjusted
Where I am now, it disgusts me more than anything. The interpretation of "I'm willing to sacrifice your life if I was told to" feels like the step before "I put you into this world and I can take you out of it." It's entitlement to a child, who is an independent individual, just because they are dependent on you for survival. I prefer the interpretation of understanding the actions you're taking and the reasons why (like how there's multiple religions that don't eat pork because it was so unsafe to eat at the time), especially if it's at someone else's expense.
Where I was in the thick of it all, it gave me morbid comfort that scares me now. I had fantasies of being a martyr for the church and the idea of being the next Isaac was just so appealing. Being a hand-selected sacrifice chosen by the Good Lord Himself? Sign me the fuck up, babey!
I think if I admitted that to my family, they'd be horrified.
It's another one of those stories or beliefs where I think the majority of christians just regurgitate what they've heard. It's a point of pride and devotion, but there's no personal reflection or cross-cultural awareness of it. Lean not unto your own understanding and whatnot. It's the potential that scares me the most, like the Quiverfull movement with the Duggars or Turpins. I'm sure there's stories now, but I can't remember them off the top of my head
(Also I will be telling my therapist someone on Tumblr called me "more well-adjusted" thank you anon)
#My therapist has called me 'surprisingly well-adjusted' before#He has since retracted that title and given it back multiple times#I don't know if you relate more to the 'Scared of my parents for praising that' or the 'Scared that I was okay with that' part#maybe both#either way the cycle ends here with you#No more bible quips and quotes that harm you and others. You find your own understanding and eventually it feels nice#It doesn't at first I will admit that. At first it feels like you're gonna go to Hell Right Here Right Now#But eventually you learn to trust yourself. It's a slow process. I've been in therapy for a good 6-7 years now#But one day you wake up and notice life feels more authentic. You feel like your values matter (and they actually do!)#And again it's slow. It's in bits and piece and back and forth. My worst habit is switching something from religious to moral#I highly recommend this type of therapy called ACT it's a CBT subtype#I'm usually not a fan of cbt so u know it helps if I recommend a subtype of it#CBT shit is so cheap I got a workbook from the library#this isnt relevant to the post but#my cat is trying to steal my burger king rn#it gets better (I have a cat) but progress isn't linear (eating burger king)#ex christian#religious trauma#anon tag
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I have found a beautiful perfect humble rock specimen that is light yellow with a weird dark yellowy brown lining, somewhat resembling a chunk of smoked gouda cheese... effervescent
#I am still very into trash collecting at the moment and even went out and got one of those grabby sticks for cheap and a little#bucket I can carry around and put trash in. so I am going on walks in nature a bit more (not really to enjoy nature but more to play the#very fun Real Life Hidden Object Point And Click Game that is 'hunt for bottle caps and cans' .. but eh.. whatever gets me out of the#house lol).. anyway.. some nature places near water will have cool rocks#Which I know you're not supposed to take them and I MOSTLY dont.. but every once in a while it's like... when else will I ever find a#gouda rock... I have cleaned up 4 buckets of trash today.. I have helped the environment.. mayhaps.. i could take a One Single Rocke as a#treate... ANYWAY. but yeah. I don't know the names of rocks but there's a rock that's a matte muted marigold yellow sort of#color and I call them 'cheese rock'. I'm pretty sure this one is of the 'cheese rock' species but it just has weird brown coloration#like maybe it got stained or something on one side of it. Most of the other cheese rocks have no markings. though sometimes there will be a#auburn reddish sort of hue on a corner or something.. hrmm.. curious. I also got a Beginner's Hobby rock tumbler and some supplies#so I might try polishing some of the rocks from my enormous rock collection. even though they're all street rocks I picked up from sidewalk#and stuff. I saw a video where someone put random gravel and stuff in a rock tumbler and none of them were Stunning Gems or whatver#but some still turned out cool enough that I would be pleased with the result... OUgh.. I want to post more I need to like do costumes and#sculptures and stuff and be Active On Social Media and think about my Future and Career and how it always benefits artists to keep an#active social media or etc. but I just feel so tired and bad lately. I think the summer heat waves have really exhausted me. I also have#been trying to make new friends + on a weird schedule so I've been socializing and also watching media too much. I notice I always start#to feel this kind of unsettled stress of not making any forward progress in my life if I do that for too long. like 'Okay this week I've#done nothing but meet up with two friends & watch like 10 episodes of tv and only worked on a few projects on the side.. this is HORRIBLE!'#(ppl who follow me here that I talk to on discord: this isn't about you! Im specifically just referencing being tired of introductory talks#with a new round of random strangers during my Friend Hunt. Just clarifying so it couldn't be misinterpreted as vaguepost implying that I'm#secretly bothered by talking to you or etc. lol.. anyway) . Which I know to MOST people 'I talked to a lot of friends and watched some cool#stuff!' sounds like a GOOD relaxing time but.. to me it is not ghhj.. Those are 'external' focuses on things outside myself which bothers#me if not moderated. Like.. i MUST retreat internally to work on my worldbuilding and my own thoughts and etc. at very regular intervals or#it will really start to bear on me too much. Brain Mandated Hermit Isolation lol. Just being too detached from my world and stuff for#too long feels increasingly bad. PLUS. every day I don't make tangible progress towards my goals is a day wasted that I could have been#investing in my future by working on novels/games/sculptures/actual career relevant stuff. Not even in a Capitalism way i just genuinely#enjoy Completing Tasks & feel miserable if I don't for too long. EVEN the media I'm watching I turn into A Task since I rank in a detailed#google doc list after viewing lol.. Like EW movie too boring on it's own. NEED to turn it into something I can categorize and analyze ghghj#LOVE to make things more complicated than they need to be. like YAAAY organizational tasks! yaay meticulous sorting!! BOO ''mindless fun''!
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sometimes wonder if people consider that, decades ago, the "cheapest" and "lowest quality" stuff generally cost more (adjusted) and was higher quality than the cheapest, lowest quality stuff available now
(I said generally)
#sun set malibu barbie cost $5 in the early 1970s#that's easily equivalent to $25 now#malibu barbie is not high quality but does have click legs and a fabric swimsuit#modern $5 swimsuit barbies have painted suits and straight legs#but yeah this is overall related to that post about how craft materials have gotten low quality#because i feel like it isn't exploring just how much *cheaper* 'cheap' is these days#with the corollary that if the equivalent of old 'cheap' prices were paid then maybe the materials *might* be better#so that's why second hand stuff is good because even older and cheaper stuff that's still around is gonna be nicer than modern cheap stuff
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entertaining the fantasy of getting out of bed extra early tomorrow to go to the nearest bakery and buy some croissants or other little treats to have for breakfast.........
#too bad the bakery down the road closed years ago#and the nearest one is almost all the way in the city center...#buying the kinda cheap mass manufactured stuff at the grocery stores' bake stations just isn't the same#maybe one day i'll try my hand at making croissants from scratch 🤔
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Are there any others you’re missing for moriiquest other than those promo pikachus?
Its those 5 promo Pikachus, Squirtle and Bulbasaur from the same promotional set, a promo Treecko, and Piloswine from Skyridge. That's all I have left 😭
#not tcg#so close but so expensive#its hard to find a piloswine that isn't holofoil and the holofoils are not cheap#the treecko is around $80-90 pretty consistently#squirtle and bulba turn up on ebay pretty often but its hard to get them in a way thats not an auction#or a set#and i got the charmander cheap and a little damaged#maybe ill buy a set and i can give the charmander to someone else doing a morii collection because the dp promos are a PAIN
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I kinda wanna make a "Manga Reader" tablet but it has to have just the right size for it
#I have like 2 cheap tablets I think I bought off a supermarket which tbh are very slow#most tablets are either too big or too weak the WiFi connection is the worst thing there in my experience#I should see maybe to download and sort manga on my laptop then have a SD card to store it#I dunno how long I'll be good with money but I'd like to buy a 12 inch tablet that Isn't Shit and can run Aniyomi (yes I'd still use that)
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me watching sab season 2, just mentally repeating to myself: it's not an adaptation it's high budget fanfiction, it's not an adaptation it's high budget fanfiction
#YOU CAN'T JUST PUT THE BATHROOM SCENE THERE#AND THEN TRY AND CRAM EVERY GOOD KANEJ LINE INTO IT BC YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN THE SPACE FOR THEM ALL TO COME OUT NATURALLY#YOU WERE GIVEN MORE TIME THAN YOU NEEDED TO TELL A STORY AND YOU'VE *COMPACTED* IT#like don't get me wrong i love a lot of what they've done here!#but like. s1 was mirroring the soc plot. so i assumed s2 would mirror crooked kingdom#but like. s1 was MUCH lower stakes than soc and gave room for it to build from there#it was a believable prequel even with the changes made#but s2 just feels like they've tried to fit every good ck moment in here#except they've allowed no buildup whatsoever#so every good moment from the books just feels cheap as hell#and i can't imagine how they could ever try to do the book plots in a future season when they've already sucked them dry#like im only on episode 3 maybe it'll change and im still for the most part enjoying watching it#but. [internal screaming]#like what is the point of this scene if kaz isn't running on 3 days no sleep and planning to walk to his death#what is especially the point of this scene if INEJ HAS YET TO SEE HIS TRAUMA AFFECT HIM#sab spoilers#six of crows#shadow and bone s2
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honestly ships that aren't necessarily romantic are sooooo much more fun than ones that are
#my favourite ships are typically ones with no feelings involved and they're both using eachother as a distraction/letting themself indulge#in cheap pleasure. in order to hide from or attempt to move on from something else#OR#the ones where the love is bitter bloody intense devouring and it consumes EVERYTHING and theres never going to be a happy ending but they#loved eachother. maybe. and isn't that what matters?#the more tragic the better for me tbh
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apartment hunting is making me sick to my stomach with dread and anxiety. not that there's nothing out there, but for the first time since moving to a new state I'll truly be alone. where to live, what to focus on when picking a ppace, time management, what listing to trust, how to handle this all alone while working nearly fulltime - it's a lot, but most worrying of all is how it'll really just be me. and that's great, that's exciting, I've wanted that - but it's also so lonely and frightening. especially since im used to living right in the middle of the city. houses on the outskirts may be cheaper and bigger, but not having a car in a neighborhood with no subway and barely any bus stops really freaks me out. for all I said I wanted greenery, it sounds like I'll need a car to even come close....the isolation and silence is a lot more intimidating than the busyness of the city I've come to expect and even find comfort it. it's great when there's people around!
#MAN. i hate change. I could cry. maybe giving up a great location in a safe and cheap neighborhood with all my needs within walking distance#ISN'T the best idea#but they always have private convos in the living room so I always feel like a third wheel in my own apartment#ugh. there's a few places very similar to the one I'm leaving. they're half as large and three times as expensive#but they're in a good place#im so glad im seeing my dad tomorrow this has just been so intimidating and overwhelming#cor.txt
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So in September we hired my friend’s now-ex partner to do some house sitting while we were gone for a week. Went Fine. Though eventually said ex turned out to be a Douche Canoe and my friend broke up with them.
This week I (finally) notice this bizarre fucking spike in our water bill...from September. And only September. Like catastrophic levels of water usage. Like roughly 6000 gallons of water over our normal. But it came back down immediately after..so it’s not like a busted pipe or anything.
Called about it, no, not a misread. We didn’t have any flooding anywhere, so it had to have been going down a drain. No running toilets for the month or anything like that, hell it should’ve been low since we were out of town for a week!- Wait a sec...
So now i want to ask my friend if their ex was some sort of deranged bath fiend but my friend is still in a rough spot from relationship drama and don’t want them to feel guilty for suggesting the ex lmao. It wasn’t too expensive, and honestly if their ex was just taking like 3 baths a day and apparently having a one person fucking slip’n’slide party or some shit while house sitting that is JUST deranged enough to be fucking hilarious...?
Normal house sitter horror stories: “They fed the Doggo Contraband and he had to go to the VET” “They spilled red wine on the carpet!” “I think they Stole Something!”
My house sitter horror story: “I think they may have somehow used 6000 gallons of water in one week.”
#honestly don't think our water heater could keep up with 3 baths a day lmao#and our bath tub isn't that big it wouldn't make any sense#fucking mysterious#luckily water is cheap AF here apparently#the bill wasn't too heinous#obviously since it took me this long to notice...#a rate increase happened around the same time so if I did notice i just wrote it off as that lmao#maybe it was something more mundane but fuck if I have any idea what it could have been...
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First thing I've bought myself in like months (other than snacks)
#maja talks#and the were cheap too#so maybe the quality isn't the best but we'll have to wait and see lol#*crochet tag
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Evaluating spend casi $800 pesos en una (otra) cartuchera de tres pisos just to organise my (over 100) pencil colours to separate them from all my others (graphite, charcoal, oil pastel, markers) art supplies cause im a organization and categorising lover (is the best thing in the world) and I love I having all in little compartiments despite not having the money for it + I'm avoiding starting my thesis and organising shit is always a good get out out of it
#should i make a tradition out of spending part of my december scholarship money in art supplies as a gift and reward from myself to myself?#maybe#like i did do like a hundred shit this year#like getting three jobs and making my academic CV go from one page to 4 aldbslfbs#AND it's December -the make the worst decision ever month- isn't it?#ya me compré a cheap fountain pen to draw and s1 got me some markers i can pretend those r my others art supplies brought for this (they re)
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ummmm
#oh mika there is beauty in life~ look at your future! everything will be worth it in the end~#my favorite image on this device btw ^#cw negative#cw vent#you know where this is going. apologies my mind is a mess and i really just need to get it out because i find its better than-#-writing a semi formal email to that One (1) emotional support organization and i’m afraid to make a call so#but i just genuinely believe things would be better off if i weren’t alive. a bit of a silly thing to jump to i know but#my tuition fees aren't cheap and i'm not even that great of a student or a daughter or a sister and i-#-have no talents or remarkable feats. i’m not impressive in any way. and i hate hearing shit about how ^_^ its okay! we all have something-#-special about ourselves! for example maybe you have really good hand writing and thats good enough ~ but that doesn't work for me because-#-i have nothing. my handwriting isn't good my singing isn't good i'm not artistically gifted i don't have some random affinity for puzzles-#-i'm not charming or somehow really good at calculation or super creative or a really comforting friend i really have nothing at all#i don’t want to die. i have no plans on doing that sort of thing anytime soon— don’t misunderstand me#i just wholeheartedly believe i don’t deserve to be here anymore not because i’m not loved. i just can’t stand myself and my teenage years-#-feel so long and i'm so fragile how much longer do i have to tolerate. i'm contributing nothing. why should my family have to feed and-#-clothe a burden like me who provides nothing. why should my friends care for someone like me. i’m not really that funny or sweet or great-#-with advice giving or pretty or helpful in any way. why is it that life is genuinely easier for others. what did i do? what can i do?#how much longer must i tolerate this? would you believe me if i said i really did try to change my mindset this time?#i have no one in real life to talk to. therapists are pricey and i don’t think mine was helping me in any way anyways. she was nice though#so every night i sleep hoping i wake up somewhere else. somewhere where i'm happier and i can live all my silly fantasies where i'm a fun-#-and lovely person who has everything she wants and nothing goes wrong ever!!#how much longer must i hang onto the little things. i’m in such an exruciating amount of pain that i want to kill myself without dying? lol#everyone repeats the same stuff. get bit#i can't rely on the joy of having coffee every morning or persevere for the sake of seeing cute cats on insta. nothing will ease the burden
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