#maybe i'll do this for other things as well?

[valenteal]

Alright I see what you’re saying about the headcanons (which are not head canons so much a inferences from the information we have) BUT I have to clarify that multiple psychologists have explained that yes Anakin Skywalker has bpd. He has enough prominently visible symptoms to be clinically diagnosed if he were a real person. This is a fact.

Yes, some Jedi get glimpses of the future, or the past, but that is in no way the same thing as fully experiencing time in a non linear fashion.

I didn’t say that Jedi had ready access to that 4th dimensional view of reality, I said that the Force gives them a glimpse of what it could be like. we literally used the same word to describe it. I’m getting this from Yoda’s lines about how Jedi are luminous beings. But I'm also not just using the movies. (I'll get into my view on Clone wars in canon shortly.) It can be inferred also from everything we know about the Cosmic Force. Basically the Cosmic Force is that fourth time dimensional view of the universe while the Living Force is the fourth SPACE dimensional view of the universe. Sorry I’ve been being a physics nerd for the past few days all this is fresh in my head right now. Point is, the Jedi truly don’t see time as a linear thing even if they are for the most part confined to the present. They see something having existed in the past as never disappearing because the past is fixed and nothing can change that. The past still exists and thus everything that existed in the past will always exist and that is how they justify not feeling grief over loss.

And I want to be clear on something: I do consider the majority of Clone Wars to be canon and I do take quite a bit from Legends as well so not everything I say comes from the movies. But as a writer I do not see Clone Wars Anakin’s characterization as faithful due to stupid things like pandering to the audience who didn’t want to confront things like the complexity an nuance of mental health and toxic environments and relationships. Everything else, the characterization of others like Obi-Wan, Yoda, and Windu? The characters who didn’t get a ton of hate after the prequels were released? That’s all fine. It’s just Padmé and Anakin who suffered from deliberately butchering their character.

So all the Mortis arc, Yoda’s season 6 adventure to become one with the cosmic force and all the implications that go with it? Canon. The Jedi Council’s treatment of Anakin? Canon.

Exactly one Jedi made a big deal about Anakin being the Chosen One: Qui-Gon. That's it. The Jedi don't treat Anakin any different than any other member of their order.

This is patently false. His admission into the order was debated by the full council in front of him. That is extremely irregular. and even once he was admitted into the order he was at the level of Palawan at a young age and skipping the initiate phase. He grew up knowing that most of the council didn't want him there. Mace in particular made it pretty damn clear he didn't like Anakin.

We also know that Anakin was powerful beyond anything the Jedi had ever seen. it can be inferred that they would react more strongly to his emotional volatility than they do with other Jedi who aren't already seen as dangerous.

...I'm not sure what you expect the Jedi to do about that? Qui-Gon died, and Padme was a Queen who had to go back to her own planet.

Well they certainly could have handled it better than they did! Maybe it wasn't their fault but it was their responsibility to help him learn to properly cope. And it wasn't just that Padmé had to return to Naboo, Anakin literally wasn't allowed to be in communication with her, which I'm pretty sure was explicitly stated in Queen's Shadow.

That was a choice that Anakin made. Sidious didn't force his hand. Anakin made the decision that the chance of saving Padme - from a fate he didn't know for sure she'd experience! - was worth betraying the Jedi, worth murdering younglings, worth overthrowing the Republic and turning it into an Empire.

Now this. This is complicated. Because on a certain level you are correct. But he also wasn't in his right mind. He'd been fighting a war for months, hadn't slept in days, was being heavily manipulated, his entire support system was absent, and he was splitting all at the same time. and if you pay attention you'll notice that he resisted very very well. it was not easy for Palpatine to manipulate him into that situation. to even get Anakin to the point where he was mentally unstable enough to turn to the dark side took over TEN YEARS of manipulation. And after that it was actually the Jedi who played the ground work for him to continue making those choices after he became Vader. because the Jedi teach that once you fall theirs no going back, which is provably false but Anakin didn't know that. you may also notice that it didn't actually take much for Vader to return to the light side. Simply having one person believe in him was enough.

Addressing the bit about him not knowing for sure Padmé would die, I have to point out that even from Phantom Menace Anakin shows extreme reliability when predicting the near future. and he touted the dreams about his mother and as a result she died. If he'd responded to this vision just a few days, heck even hours, earlier Shmi could have survived.

That's why I call Anakin selfish and possessive. Because ultimately, he didn't care about Padme's feelings or opinions.

And this is where we come back to the BPD, which again is NOT a head canon but the opinion of multiple psychologists and people with BPD.

Anakin greatly values Padmé's feelings and opinions most of the time. to an unhealthy degree. to the point where his self-image is reliant on her opinion of him.

He was in the midst of a splitting episode. Here's a definition:

Splitting is a symptom of BPD. It occurs when a person sees everything as black or white, good or bad, or best or worst. Splitting is a defense mechanism people living with BPD use to deal with emotions (such as the fear of abandonment) that they cannot handle.

That's what was going on. He was unable to reconcile Padmé being against the side he'd chosen and thus could only see it as a betrayal. I also have to point out that he didn't actually choke her that hard or for that long. Her struggles weren't nearly as frantic as the could've been and later the medical droid made it clear that the was nothing physically wrong with her. There didn't even seem to be any bruising. Padmé shouldn't have died. And Anakin shouldn't have survived. And the Force can be used to drain life energy and transfer it to another person. Palpatine wanted Anakin alive and isolated, so killing Padmé to keep him alive would have been the perfect strategy. Anyway that's getting into theory territory so I digress. The Point is Anakin didn't choose to disregard Padmé or her beliefs, I don't even know if he was cognizant at all of Sidious's plans or what they meant. All he could really see was a black and white view of his side vs. the Jedi.

As for the unconditional love you say he needed? Padme did love him unconditionally.

Which is exactly why he was so desperate to protect her. Even beyond the fact that he loved her she was literally the only person who gave him what he needed. She was his entire support system. If the Jedi had supported him the way he needed things might have turned out differently. If he'd felt safe actually asking for help and being open about the details of the situation the Jedi might actually have been able to do something about it. But when he did go and ask for help he was chastised for caring and wanting to save someone from a possibly preventable death. Which is so messed up. Yoda didn't even press for details about the nature of the death to determine the risk of doing something. just claimed that sometimes the harder you fight the future the more likely it becomes or something. I don't see how Padmé potentially seeing a Jedi healer could have made things worse.

In conclusion the Jedi Order and its Council made a Buch of huge screw up when it came to raising Anakin and it ended up killing them and literally driving him insane. His mental health was their responsibility and they didn't just drop the ball, they threw it.

"no attachments" in SW literally just means "don't be selfish and possessive". that's it. that's all there is. doesn't mean jedi can't have friends and loved ones. they can. just. don't be possessive and selfish about it. don't murder thousands of people in an effort to save one.

[theoccultz]

How will your future spouse pursue you ?

Ok you guys the series is finally here

All of my pacs are queer friendly

It can be anyone, your s/o or your longterm connection

Pics and dividers not mine , credits to their rightful owners @/saradika

Apologies for any mistakes

Let me know which pile you picked and don't be afraid to express your thoughts (:

Pile l . Pile ll. Pile lll.

🫀 Pile l.

For this series if you have any topic suggestion let me know I'll include it

>>> | Queen of swords , 4of wands , 5 of cups |

This person is gonna be competitive for your attention , they dont fall in love easily and when they do its ride or die , they are your typical bad boy stereotype that you see in the movies , they are someone who knows they are the best in the room this person's self esteem & self concept is amazing, their confidence speak for itself, they are someone who has seen a lot of things in life and their way of getting to you is very simple and straightforward, maybe in the past people weren't as actively pursuing you as you would love them too but this person is not like this , they are on your face they know they want you and they're gonna be sincere & upfront about it , this person is generally very quiet and people have a lot of ridiculous assumptions about them like they're a player etc etc but best believe me they're really not what others think of him , this person is hot asf , you could be a very stubborn person who takes decision carefully about their life and this will stress them out n,ot in a way to deceit anyone but they know they have to prove everyone wrong so that you see them truly for who they are awww:(

Anyways this person is very masculine in nature , they are gonna act as a mentor and a caregiver, you want this ? I got it , you need this ? Its on me ....and you're like wtf i can do that myself but its just their way to make you feel special , this person does not do that for everyone if they are doing 50% for you then they are gonna do 20% for their friends its like they value your connection a lot and they don't want you to feel like you're just like everyone else in their life , this person is gonna defend you in every situation be it with their family or friends they dont give a shit , this person is also very keen on you they notice everything about you , how you care for people what you like to wear so their another hobby will be gift giving they are very thoughtful and they'd love to make you smile . The four of wands with the five of cups rx is very much i don't want to see them sad , i don't want them to doubt our connection, i want to put efforts for them , i want to do SO much that this person never feel less about themselves, i feel like being with this person , one of the best things about them ...that you're gonna like is they are deadly whatever they do its 100% efforts they dont like to tease their partner even in a slightest way because they know words can stick with a person forever so they're very mindful ,people can envy this the most about you guys its like no one can say anything bad abt my partner if you're gonna be passive then i might play this game as well , they could have a scorpio mercury or virgo so whatever they say is gonna hurt the other person because scorpions and virgos are known for their details , they study people very deeply , whatever they say hold meaning.

This person is definately that cold hearted girl/ guy or you are because i'm picking up on this black cat energy from you and cats do not chose their owners instantly neither do they love everyone. I Also picked up on a very rockstar appearance like long hairs , leather jacket, ripped jeans , its so cool , they remind me of early 2000's era

How will they pursue you : competitively , your friends post you every week ?? ...i'm gonna post you everyday its that kind of person lol , the back of the deck I usually take that as an overall energy is ace of pentacle which is a very stable and set energy in its own so whatever they do , they do it to achieve victory , to be recognised, to show you that they are the shit (;

Channelled song :

Thank you for reading!!

🫀Pile ll .

For this series if you have any topic suggestion let me know I'll include it

| 10 of cups , strength, four of swords |

Ok so this is our cool guy /girl lmao

Even though they will be putting in efforts to pursue you , you shouldn't know that they are doing that , i feel like they will be pursuing you from the get go like this person on a random monday evening will just accept i have feelings for this person and i want them , now this person will try to make it seem like its all a coincidence, this could be a leo mercury or gemini they try to entertain people with their words but their words hold honesty which people cant always catch so they will try to make you feel comfortable like you should feel happy in their presence and it will satisfy them and they will replay this in their mind at night like oh this person laughed at my joke they touched me i made them happy and it brings a smile on their face , they might say or do things which will make you laugh take a scenario like OH ...and you're like what happened and this person is like deja vu darling i think we belong together the universe knows and its so cheesy but its also so cute , they like to break this barrier between you guys , this person will be friendly towards you , they will flirt with you , they're also very spontaneous and a little bit tricky they love to play with you , lets say you guys have a dinner plan and you're excited you're dressed up you have already reached the venue but they will purposefully show up late and when you text them they're like WHAT...? We had plans ? but they are just joking they are alrdy at the venue waiting for you to see them , they might even joke with you like oh i have 5 kids to feed ofcourse i'm late & its a very playfully banter , you play along like YOU match their freak ... its ridiculous you wanna be mad at them but you can't but i understand your feelings pile 2 and i validate 🙂‍↔️✋🏽

I really think this person is gonna steal your parents love like 😭✋🏽they are the favourite child now , this person has a tendency to play cool like they dont wanna give in first..... they want you to give in first its kind of a cute ego idk , let's take a scenario they say "love you " and you're like where's my " I LOVE YOU " and they're like yes "I LOVE YOU TOO" so petty 😭 they have this natural ability to piss you off , this is the type of person when someone would ask you guys ..."so who confessed first ??...they're gonna jump in like ofcourse it was them , they were crazy about me like you dont know i had to give in but its not true its the opposite. So as you can already guess their ass ? Dramatic ...but you cant say they are dramatic because they are gonna be MORE dramatic about it .

How will they pursue you ? With fear because i feel like they will mask their desire to make you theirs with humour you could start off as friends or colleagues so they cant be very open about their feelings because they feel like you are not focused on love and you might reject them so it's their little cute tactics to get to your heart yeah but they are gonna be very anxious about it they could even suffer from inferiority complex.

Channelled song:

Thank you for reading!!

🫀Pile lll.

For this series if you have any topic suggestion let me know I'll include it

• 3ofcoins, wheel of fortune rx , seven of swords rx •

This person will absolutely be focused on providing comfort to you whether it be emotional or sexual , they love to do things with you they love to hang out with you , they creatively express themselves, they are someone who's gonna listen to your rants they are gonna embrace every flaw & every good thing about you , you are gonna feel exposed in their presence there's something about this person knowing you more than you know them , they really love to spend time with you , i'm seeing this person pushing you towards better goals like your life is gonna improve being with them ,this person will be very happy for your success, they are gonna put you on pedestal they think you are more lovable than them and you deserve more than them and i can confidently say they'll always love you more than you love them its very sweet but also sad , they have insecurities yet they are here trying to soothe your heart, they are gonna apologise first its like they dont wanna lose you they know how to keep a connection you wouldn't need to worry this is a connection where you can let yourself just be you aint gonna walk on eggshells, they are mature , i feel like this person cannot express themselves through words so they prefer to write to you , take you to places with them , praise you infornt of others , make you something, i feel like this persons love is comforting and sweet , you are their equal and they want you to feel like that.

This person will definately engage more in your life , they are gonna be supportive towards you like a best friend, they will overgive to you , they can even say stuff like ...." as long as i'm here i'm gonna be there for you ".....they will hold your hand while you walk they will listen to your problems, they will embrace your silly nature , take you out , spend time with you " i'm getting this line you came and the other one is like you called " it went viral on tiktok i think its from a movie but yeah the energy is very much sweet

Oh you guys this is so sweet , you guys dont speak the same language? They're gonna learn for you we have that kind of person here , you know when they are in love they get hearty eyes it shows on their face and in their behaviour, those sneaky eye contacts , those blush when you are mentioned, the sincerity in their words ,its all there .

How they're gonna pursue you ? Its very passionate and being Passionate does not mean always having hots for each other and that is exactly how they will make you feel , you feel this wholeness i'm having a hard time describing it...its so divine...you know just so grateful and lucky to have a connection like this in this day n age , Yeah 😭this is sooooooo damnnn cuteee i'm scared of this person's energy its very intense , i mean your partner is into worshipping & if you like this then this is definitely your pile (:

Channelled song:

Thanks for reading!!

[mapis-putellas]

𝑾𝒉𝒐 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖?

Pairing: Alexia Putellas x reader

Words: 1600+

Warnings: none

Summary: You prank on Alexia by pretending to lose your memory. Her reaction was…well, way more adorable than you were expecting.

While biking with Alexia was always a blast, you had an extra plan for this sunny afternoon. You'd decided that today was the perfect day for a little prank — nothing too mean, just something to mess with her. You grinned to yourself as you watched her up ahead, pedaling easily and glancing back to make sure you were keeping up. You pedaled harder to catch up, laughing to yourself at what was about to go down.

Suddenly, you pretended to lose control and threw yourself to the ground with an exaggerated groan.

"Ahhh!" you cried dramatically, flopping onto the grass by the side of the trail. Alexia, as you expected, immediately stopped her bike, worry flashing across her face.

"Mi amor!" she called, practically jumping off her bike and sprinting over to you. She knelt by your side, her hands gentle as she brushed the hair from your face. "Are you okay? Did you... hurt? Show me!"

You blinked a few times, looking up at her with a dazed expression. "Um... sorry, who are you?" You made sure to sound confused, biting back a laugh at her shocked expression.

Her eyes widened in panic. "Que?" She put a hand on your shoulder, her gaze searching your face with concern. "Amor, it's me! Alexia."

You blinked again, trying to look utterly bewildered. "Alexia? Sorry, I... I don't really know who that is."

She froze, her eyes growing huge. "No... no, no, no," she muttered, now kneeling down so that her face was inches from yours. "I'm... I'm Alexia. Your novia. Your... your girlfriend?"

You tilted your head, looking at her curiously. "You're my... girlfriend?" You let out a surprised chuckle, trying to make it sound half-nervous. "You're sure about that?"

"Si, yes!" She nodded vigorously, grabbing your hands. "We live together. We... we love each other."

You furrowed your brows as if trying to piece things together. "So... you and I are a couple?" You tried to hold back your amusement as she stared at you, looking absolutely devastated.

"Yes, yes, we are a couple." Her voice softened, her grip on your hands tightening. "Don't... don't you remember me?"

You shook your head slowly, giving her an exaggeratedly pitiful look. "I... I'm really sorry, but no."

The panic in her eyes was almost too much. She squeezed your hands, bringing them to her chest. "I'm your Alexia, mi amor. We met at a game! You... you don't remember this?"

You shook your head, biting back laughter. "A game? Are you... famous or something?"

Her face turned a little pink, and she gave a shy, frustrated nod. "Sí, um, yes. I play football. For Barcelona. And, um... Spain." She said this as if hoping it would jog your memory. "And... you... you make fun of my English sometimes. You... you laugh at me, remember?"

You blinked at her, trying to keep up the confused act. "I make fun of your English?" You let out a tiny chuckle. "Why would I do that?"

She sighed, glancing away briefly before meeting your gaze again, her face soft and concerned. "Because... because you love me. And you say it's cute. My English."

"Oh... really?" You tilted your head, taking in her flustered expression. "Well, you do have a cute accent, I'll give you that." You winked, and she let out a relieved little laugh, squeezing your hands.

"See? I am cute." She tried a smile, though her worry hadn't faded. "And... I love you, a lot. So you must remember, sí?"

You pretended to think hard, then shook your head, looking up at her with a small frown. "I... I don't remember. But you do seem nice. And pretty.”

Her cheeks turned pink again, but she gave you a nervous smile. "Thank you," she murmured, glancing down at your hands in hers. "Maybe... maybe it's, how you say, temporary? Like in movies?" She perked up a bit. "You... you hit your head?"

You nodded thoughtfully, trying to keep a serious face. "Maybe? I mean, everything's a bit foggy..."

She nodded back, visibly gathering herself. "Okay. We... we can fix this," she muttered, more to herself than to you. Then she took a deep breath, looking at you with that determined, captain-like gaze. "I tell you about us, okay? You will remember."

You shrugged, letting her go on. "Alright. Tell me about... us."

She took a deep breath, her face now slightly pink. "Well... we met one year ago. You came to a game, Barcelona against Atletico." Her eyes lit up a bit, a small smile appearing. "You told me you didn't know football very much, but you... you liked watching us play."

You squinted at her as if trying to remember, though you were honestly just mesmerized by how passionate she was getting. "Did I say that?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "Yes! You said... how do you say... that we were... inspiring?" She looked at you, hopeful. "You say that, yes?"

"Hmm... that does sound like something I'd say," you mused, nodding.

"Good!" She smiled in relief. "And then we went to... um, what's the place? With the..." She made a motion of eating, clearly struggling to remember the English word.

"A restaurant?" you offered, keeping up the act but feeling a bit guilty at how invested she was in telling the story.

"Yes! A restaurant!" She nodded quickly. "And you told me... you like my smile. And... and I like yours. I think you are very beautiful." Her voice softened at the end, her eyes warm as she looked at you.

You pretended to blush, looking away for a moment before glancing back at her with a shy smile. "You really thought that?"

She nodded, her face lighting up with the sweetest, most genuine smile. "Sí. Very much. And... we laughed, a lot." She squeezed your hands again. "You laugh at my English. And you teach me new words."

"Oh, like what?" you asked, tilting your head with a smirk.

Her cheeks flushed. "Um... cheeky. You say I am cheeky." She grinned, clearly pleased with herself. "And... um, you call me... 'cute'... and sometimes, um, 'lovebug'?"

You couldn't help but smile at that. "I call you lovebug?"

She nodded, her eyes filled with hope and affection. "Sí, it's my... nickname." She reached up, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "And you... you say you love my... 'determination'? Yes, that word."

You had to bite your lip to keep from laughing, trying to stay in character. "And... you're sure we're a couple?"

Her face grew serious as she leaned closer. "I am sure. We are... very in love, you and me. And... and you even say I am 'the love of your life.'" Her cheeks turned red again, but she didn't break eye contact.

Your heart melted a bit at her words, feeling a sudden pang of guilt for messing with her so thoroughly. But you decided to push just a little further, if only to see that flustered look one more time.

"Hmm... that does sound familiar," you murmured, reaching out to brush a thumb over her cheek, making her blush deepen. "But... maybe I need one more thing to really jog my memory."

She blinked, tilting her head in confusion. "What... what do you need?"

You gave her a playful grin. "Maybe... a kiss?"

Her eyes went wide for a moment, and she glanced around, as if wondering if anyone could see you two by the side of the trail. But then she gave you a soft smile, her eyes filled with warmth and love. "Sí... of course."

She leaned in, her lips meeting yours in the softest, sweetest kiss. You could feel the sincerity and tenderness in every moment, the way she cupped your face as if she was afraid you'd disappear. When she finally pulled back, her cheeks were red, but she looked at you with a spark of hope.

"Did it... did it work?" she whispered, her voice barely above a breath.

You smiled, letting out a quiet laugh. "Yeah... I think it worked." You couldn't keep up the act any longer, the warmth in her eyes making your heart feel like it could burst. "How could I forget you, lovebug?"

For a moment, she just stared at you, her face a mix of relief and realization. And then her eyes narrowed, her hands still holding yours, but her grip tightening just a bit.

"Wait..." She gave you a suspicious look. "You... you remember me all the time?"

You couldn't help but let out a laugh, sheepishly nodding. "Maybe..."

Her mouth fell open, and she stared at you in disbelief. "You... you lie to me?" She slapped your arm lightly, half-annoyed but clearly relieved. "I think you... you forget me! You... you are so mean!"

You laughed, reaching out to pull her into a hug, grinning as she half-heartedly pushed you away. "I'm sorry! I just wanted to see what you'd say!"

She let out an exasperated sigh, though you could see the smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "Ay, you make me so worried!" But she couldn't stay mad, and a small smile finally broke through. "You are lucky I love you, sí?"

You grinned, leaning in to kiss her cheek. "I know. And for the record, I remember every little detail about you. I just love hearing you talk about us.”

She huffed, crossing her arms but looking a little pleased. "I am glad you... like my English. Even if you laugh at me."

You wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close as you both sat back down in the grass. "Laughing is just my way of loving you, you know that."

Her face softened as she leaned into you, resting her head on your shoulder. "Sí... I know. But next time, I prank you. This... is promise.

You chuckled, squeezing her hand. "I'd love to see you try, lovebug."

**

Tags:

@ceesimz @marysfics @girlgenius1111 @codiemarin @silentwolfsstuff @goldenempyrean @xxnaiaxx @liloandstitchstan

[cheeseceli]

The Night We Met

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin x Gn!reader

Genre: fluff, angst, strangers to lovers, second chance, fic (2.8k words)

Prompt: “I had all and then most of you, some and now none of you. Take me back to the night we met."

Warnings: both of them cry at some point, heartbreak, insecurities, party (?), Han makes a cameo, happy ending

A/n: when the hardest part of writing is finding the right layout | daily click

I had all

Hyunjin knew more than to trust Han Jisung. Of course, he loved Han as one would love a brother, and he would trust his life to his friend if needed, but he should've known to not trust Han to stay put during the party. Simply because Jisung was nowhere to be found and Hyunjin was now holding two glasses of drink in the middle of unknown faces.

Great.

Trying to get a hold of his friend, Hyunjin navigated the sea of strangers. "I'll stay with you all the time. It will be fun." Honestly, how did he even believe his friend at all? Throughout all the time he looked for him, he made a mental note of never going out with Han again.

Finding a balcony, Hyunjin thought his friend could be there. He probably ran out of social battery and ran away from the crowd. Yeah, that could be it. Even better, as Hyunjin himself couldn't stand being in that party anymore. Maybe they both could just put an end to the night and finally go home.

Hyunjin even smiled at the thought, only to see an empty balcony when he opened the door. He was not going home any time soon apparently.

With the not so optimistic thought, he leaned on the wall and sat down, sighing. That was not how he thought his night was going to look like. Now he was with two cups of a horrible drink, sitting on the dirty floor, shivering because of the cold breeze and -

"There are some blankets in the sofa if you want."

He turned his head quite fast, almost dripping the liquid on the cup into his clothes, to the direction of the voice. You were sitting in the corner of the balcony, where the lights couldn't reach properly. He couldn't see your figure, but as he didn't recognise your voice, he probably didn't even know you to begin with.

"Uh... Thank you" he got up off his spot and went in the direction of the said couch, which was fairly close to where you were sat. There were some blankets in there, and they were surprisingly clean. Hyunjin glanced at you only to see you weren't looking at him anymore, instead facing the view and covering your body with a fabric he believes you took from the couch. "What are you doing?"

You looked at him again. He didn't recognise your face, which proves the fact that he really didn't know you before, but he's sure he won't ever forget you after tonight. You were unfairly beautiful.

"I'm just taking a break from the party" you say nonchalantly "Things can get overwhelming rather quickly there."

Hyunjin chuckled; he knew the feeling very well. Actually, he was drowned in the sensation of "overwhelm" just five minutes before. Funnily enough, he was feeling way better now. Refreshed, even. He sat on the floor, back on the sofa, while he covered his legs with one of the blankets "I know what you mean. The ambience was... Chaotic, to say the least. I'm Hyunjin, by the way."

You smiled and God, he wished he could be the reason to so many of your future smiles. And he was, in fact. That night was only the beginning of a "you" that meant two. The only difference would be that instead of finding yourselves in boring parties, you'd purposely go to each other every cold night, just so you could share a blanket under the starry night.

You would admire the view, he would look at you, and he felt like he had it all right there.

And some of you

But not every night was about staying awake under the moon. Some were actually used to sleep, and how Hyunjin despised those were inexplicable.

At the beginning, he thought he just didn't want to close his eyes when he could be with you instead. That stopped when he convinced you of sharing a bed almost every night. Then he would hug your figure and sleep with a smile on his lips. Sweet dreams would fill his brain until he had to wake up, only to find you in his arms and have the first smile of his day.

However, at some point, the night became full of terrors. Maybe it was that one night where he had a bad dream, where he could feel you slipping away from his fingers. Where no "I'm sorry" or "I love you" convinced you to stay. Where your eyes were still filled with love and admiration, yet you turned your back and went away. Amidst his tears and the dreadful pain in his chest, he felt realisation. The moment he completely lost you. And to wake up to an empty bed was not the confirmation he needed.

"Y/n?" he whispered his voice still too weak to actually speak. That could not be it. He repeated himself, louder. "Y/n?"

He felt his lungs unable to breathe. No no no no no no. There was no way he lost you that easily, that he lost you at all. The moment he tried to get out of bed in a failed attempt to go after you, he shattered down into the floor. It all felt too dark. Too real.

"Hyune?" he heard your voice on the doorstep, now your footsteps coming closer. Thank God. "Hyune, look at me."

You kneeled down next to him, holding his face. Your touch immediately melted him down and he had no other reaction than to hold you as close as he could, like his life depended on that. He could feel your heart beat and your fingers caressing his hair. He could hear your reassuring voice and how your breathing was calming him down. You were there. No matter what was going on inside his head, you were there. With him. Nowhere else. And Hyunjin really swears he did his best to focus on that, but it didn't completely work.

Somewhere in his being, he didn't feel you as completely as he used to. Maybe it was just his inner voice, but, since that night, he was affirmative that he could feel you slipping away. Even if you reassured him of your love, he was still scared. You still looked at him with love when you left on that cursed night after all. Which made him think that maybe it would be his fault. So he really tried as much as he possibly could, and even more. He said "I love you more". He never hesitated on apologising after a fight. He didn't even dream of losing an opportunity to kiss or hug you, especially at night. Especially when he closed his eyes to sleep and he knew he wouldn't be able to do anything if you decided to just leave.

In those moments, his dreams became prayers, asking God to let him be with you. If not forever, at least for most of it.

Some

He tried to convince himself that it wasn't his fault. It was his first time being in love, it was the first time he ever lived for love. He was still learning. At least he was willing to understand and improve, his friends said, so that should mean something. But none of those things helped him forgive himself.

He couldn't, not when he saw you crying. It wasn't the first time that the both of you argued, not the first time he made you stressed, nor the first time you made him want to rip his hair out. But it was mostly certain the first time he made you cry. And with your eyes filled with tears in front of him, he found himself lost. What on earth was he supposed to do?

He'd love to become a time traveler and just go back to where he hadn't screwed everything up. But that was impossible, wasn't it?

Hyunjin was in shock like he had never been before. What had he said? He doesn't even remember, and he doesn't think something that cruel could've come out of his lips. At least not something that he actually meant. So what did he say? Why did he say it?

Maybe he could've kneeled down next to you, just like you did for him that one night where he had a nightmare. But he remembers that, after falling to the ground, he kept on searching for you. He still wanted you to find him, he needed you to come to him. Would you want him to come any closer? Would you want him to hold you? Would you want him?

He didn't know. And in no part of his being he found the strength to find out. Maybe the fear of being rejected, even if temporarily, scared him the most. He hurt you. You had every single reason to want to scream at him, fight him, even run from him. Would Hyunjin be able to take it? If you were to break his heart, would you just scratch it or would you destroy it? Either way, he couldn't take it.

So he just stood there. He watched as you started to seek comfort in the sweater you were wearing, the one that was originally his. He saw your tears falling in the same rhythm of his unsteady breathing. And he doesn't know when his knees failed him and he just fell down to the ground, helplessly, but he felt it alongside with his heart aching.

We'll be alright, he tried to say. Mostly he tried to convince himself of that matter, but he felt nothing but disappointment the moment he saw your face again. He failed you. As your friend, as your lover. And maybe he could try to say it was his first time being in love, but that doesn't take away the guilt that consumes his brain right now.

Maybe he could say that with some more effort, that could be forgotten in the past and he'd love you better, but he didn't know if you could endure more "some" with him.

And now none of you

Maybe that was the worst that ever happened to him. The punishment of feeling your weight in the bed, of feeling your warmth not too far away, but not feeling your touch. Because that was what was happening. And it hurts.

He could only see the back of your body, as you refused to face him during the night. The bed wasn't even that large, but it seemed like there was an entire ocean separating the both of you. It was unfamiliar, so wrong to not have you attached to him. It felt like what he feared the most. And what's possibly worst is that he should've been used to that now as the past nights were like that too. You were still in his sight, but not where he could reach you.

He tries to think of where he failed and how he can turn back. You never showed sighs of going away until he convinced himself you were. He just didn't want to take you for granted. Did he self sabotage instead? All he ever wanted was to love you. How did he miss himself between the lines?

He hears your soothing breathing and he feels like he could cry. When thinking about losing you, he felt like his world was collapsing. He used to do his best to try to keep you by his side. But now he just feels lost, filled with regrets. Simply because he was dumb enough to lose you for nothing. When did it go wrong?

At that moment, he wondered why you were still there. Obviously, he appreciated it more than he could ever explain, but he couldn't understand. Maybe you just wanted to find something, a single reason, that would be able to explain your permanence. After all, he loved you. You loved him just as much. But maybe, because it was your first time being in love, none of you knew that just love wasn't enough. You can adore someone and maybe even then it won't be enough. Merely because it isn't.

Although you wished to stay, maybe it just wasn't correct for you to do so.

That night, Hyunjin finally came to terms with it. Nothing would stop you from leaving. Not even him, not even you, not even love.

Just like he once prayed to have most of forever with you, now he prays that this will not be your last goodbye. Maybe a "see you soon". Maybe a "we will find each other when we're both ready". Anything along these lines. Just not, for God's sake, a final goodbye. Anything but that.

You're a little bit confused when you wake up being held by Hyunjin. Considering how you made sure to have some distance for the night, hoping that would make things easier, it was a shock to find your entire being intertwined with his. He was hugging you like he would never let go and you were counting on that. You almost complied. But when you felt his tears falling on your shirt, right where Hyunjin laid his head, you knew that he knew it too.

That was not how any of you expected it to go, but none of that mattered in the moment. Not when it was already decided. You hugged him closer, in hopes of stopping the inevitable. When it didn't work, you just wished you'd have more opportunities to hug him again.

Take me to the night we met

It was funny, to say the least. The one time Han didn't forget about Hyunjin in a party was because Hyunjin decided to run away himself this time. At least Jisung improved since the last time they partied together.

But right now, all Hyunjin could think of was to breathe. Breathe in, breathe out. Again. The mood inside the party was suffocating: way too many people doing everything at once. It was chaotic, really. So that's how he found himself in the balcony of the hosting house, breathing in every time the cold air touched his face.

When the door opened, he felt the bit of sanity he had left disappearing. No way he could talk or interact with someone without losing his mind; there was a reason he was running away.

He genuinely thought of just asking the person to go away, claiming he needed some space. But when he glanced at the stranger, he realised that he actually knew the person quite well. He promised himself that he would never forget your face after all.

You haven't perceived him just yet,you were too busy looking at the view. Just like the night he met you. He has always thought it was beautiful how you looked at the dark sky. It was almost as if you had a connection to the stars, like you're one of them who got lost in Earth. You for sure looked as dazzling as one.

"There are no blankets this time. I checked."

It was almost comic how fast you turned your head towards him. You didn't believe your ears when you heard his voice, and you now didn't believe your eyes. It was amazing how you always found your way to him whenever you needed a break from the world. Even after going almost no-contact with him, in a way or another you'd always find him. Or perhaps he is the one who'd always meet you.

"I actually needed one right now." you chuckled, feeling yourself a bit vulnerable to the cold breeze. However, your focus was in Hyunjin and how he looked at you in the same way he did before... everything. You probably looked at him just the same. "Do you mind if I stay? Just for a bit, inside there is quite..."

"Chaotic?" He smiled, emanating this huge feeling of peace.

"To say the least." You watched him move a little to the left, leaving you a spot to sit. And so you did.

Although you were both shivering by being exposed to the outside weather, it felt surprisingly warm being next to each other. It still felt comfortable.

He remembers how he once prayed he'd see you again. He did. He also remembers how he wanted to stay the most part of forever with you. Now that he spent some time without you, he wonders if that means that from now on it will be different. He hopes so.

Hyunjin smiled to himself and looked to the sky just in time to see that the moon seemed to smile right back at him. At you both. And he has a feeling that his prayers were heard after all.

Masterlist | you'll probably like: hold me

Reminder that this is all fiction, this does not represent the members in real life!

Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans @dandelions-143 @sleepyleeji @jinnie-ret

Dividers by @thecutestgrotto | images 1, 2 and 3

[bubbarnes]

oh my god bella, i was scared and was about to say that i didn't read the first part and then found out i actually did it, rambling as fucking always and even said she was trick and treated with some good dick, what the hell? lmao

anyways, this was... an experience? like, i know you say it's more personal and all but baby, at least for me it was so close to home, i don't even know if that makes sense.

i know she is having the best boyfriend and everything but my god, those feelings? the whole "i can't fit no matter what I do"? that was so fucking good and so well written that i feel it in my heart and soul and felt like crying and that hollow, you know?

and then you go and punch me some more with bucky's sweetness, showing me I'll never have him and oh, how obsessed he is with her? i live for that shit.

i love how much he loves her. and in my mind, obviously you know them better but like, bucky fell first and harder, you know? of course they're crazy for each other but i just know he loves her so much he would do anything for his woman, no matter how difficult, hard and/or impossible that is.

i love them and i just know the moment she's saying yes to marry him, he's gonna be like "you want to get married like, right now? maybe tomorrow, so you can get your hair and make up done" lmaooo

i cannot believe once again, i am leaving a whole ass boring thing here but it's totally your fault. can't believe you made me feel sad and happy and envious of what they have and everything else. i love youuuu.

with you

part one

pairing: bucky barnes x curvy!reader

warnings: 18+ only. established relationship from everybody talks - but can be read as a standalone! feelings of loneliness. some angst. unprotected sex. squirting. use of pet names (sweetheart, doll, baby). dirty talk. heaps and heaps of fluff. if something needs to be tagged, pls lmk!

words: just about 8.5k

notes: a huge thank you to @whatever-lmaoo for beta-ing for me yet again! i appreciate you so much!! and i know, i know, a little late for a halloween fic- but i guess it’s okay bc this isn’t really all that halloweeney lol. honestly a little more personal than usual but i hope you all enjoy it anyway. please let me know what you think and thank you in advance for taking the time to read! 🩵

You’re pushing the basket, weaving your way through the aisles full of other semi last minute shoppers in search of their own Halloween costumes. You can’t get past a family spread out in the middle of the aisle as they contemplate their options aloud, no concern for the other people around them trying to shop. You suppress your eye roll but not the sigh of slight annoyance as you back up and move to the next aisle over, thankfully empty.

There aren’t many options here, but maybe something will give you an idea of what to dress up as. A couple minutes pass as you peruse the random assortment of costume accessories. Your mind is fully in idea mode as you try to piece something wearable together in your mind… you have that black maxi dress hanging in your closet, that could probably work as a good base.

You’re not paying attention to your surroundings as you nudge the basket further down the aisle while you examine two different pairs of long black gloves in your hands and take a step down the aisle to see the witch hats.

But do you really wanna be a witch? You purse your lips in thought before tossing the sets of gloves back into the big green cauldron you got them from. Your eyes linger on the witch section as you grasp the handle of the cart and start to push.

Before you set your head straight, you’re stopped in your path as you find yourself crashing into something. Oh gosh…

Someone.

Your apology is sputtering out past your lips before you can even turn to see the injured party, but once you do, and your eyes meet with sparkling blues, you stop your fumbling and sigh heavily in your relief.

“Oh, thank god,” you breathe as your shoulders relax. “I thought I actually hit someone.”

“Am I not someone?” Bucky scoffs with a hint of a smile on his lips.

“No, you are,” you assure him as you leave the basket and walk toward him, “but you’re my someone, so it’s okay and you have to forgive me.”

“Oh, I see,” he nods, eyeing you in your approach. You double check the aisle is still clear before kissing him, soft and fleeting.

“Did you find it?”

“Out of stock,” he frowns.

“Damn. We’ve looked everywhere, what now?”

“I don’t think ghosts lining the grass are gonna do much more than the full out display you’ve already set up, sweetheart. I think we’ll be okay,” he laughs.

“Yeah,” you sigh, a soft pout still on your lips, “you’re right. I just…”, a tight, heavy sigh leaves you as you shake your head, trailing off.

Bucky steps closer, his hand coming to rest on your waist, squeezing lightly.

“I know,” he says, softly.

You force a smile, taking his hand to hold in yours. “Alright, well, we got the candy and the groceries and the toothpaste,” you list aloud, trying to think if you’re forgetting anything.

“Toilet paper,” Bucky supplies, pushing the cart backwards before turning it to push it himself.

“Toilet paper! Who needs a list when I have you,” you lean into him as you walk before heading to the aisle ahead of him.

—

“Sweetheart?” Bucky calls from the kitchen as you wipe at the stray tear falling down your cheek. You blow your nose gently and close out of the app.

Another post of fall fun your nieces are having, and right below it another post from another costume party you weren’t invited to.

Don't let it get to you, you chide yourself. It's just the fomo sinking in. Nothing more.

You wipe at your cheeks before grabbing the door handle, calling down the stairs, "I'm coming!"

You make your way down the steps and are met at the bottom with Bucky, smiling like a schoolboy.

In his hands he holds a singular Halloween decoration.

"It's not light up ghosts, but,"

"It's perfect," you cut him off, smiling softly as you take the familiar ghost cutout from his hands.

You can't help but grin at the memory of your first Halloween with Bucky. Your first date. First meeting! God, it's been a whirlwind of a year.

Your eyes flicker to his and you immediately meet his stunning gaze; his already set on you.

"Just like you," he simpers.

You groan in jest, setting the cutout to rest along the stairs before you wrap your arms around him, leaning into his warm, solid hold. You sigh as he rubs your back comfortingly.

"Hey," he calls gently, causing you to pick up your head to look at him. "Talk to me. Please," he adds as your pout grows. "You've been off all week, what's going on?"

Your gaze drops to his chest as your arms drop from around him. He doesn't let you slip away as he takes your hand in his and leads you to the couch, pushing you down before he follows suit, wasting no time in getting you back in his hold once you're both comfortable. You let your head rest on his chest as he holds you.

"I miss my family," you say simply with a shrug.

He waits for more, but when he realizes you're done talking, he speaks himself.

"You've been missing them since we moved here," he presses, "I know it's not just that."

You mindlessly play with the buttons on his shirt, not able to make eye contact right now.

You swallow hard.

You know the truth, and you know Bucky deserves to know what you're thinking. After all, he did uproot his entire life for you after only knowing you five months...

"I just...I don't know."

You glance up at him, his eyes soft and gaze patient.

"I... What if this was just a huge mistake?" You ask. "Moving here. Just another stupid, selfish idea that I'm gonna regret by next year."

"Living your life away from your family isn't stupid or selfish," he says, no judgement in his soothing voice. "And, you know what we talked about before we moved here. No regrets. And if you decide you want to go back,"

"We go back," you nod. "I know."

"Well," he starts, "do you?"

"No," you answer right away. It's the truth. You don't. But still, that fear. The unknown, it nips at you. What if? "I knew this wasn't gonna be easy, but," you sigh, "what if I just don't belong here?"

His brows furrow, "Why wouldn't you?"

"It's been, what, seven months? And what do I have to show for it? And it's not just work-" you stop yourself before you start to rambling, taking a deep breath. "I haven't even made a single friend yet. All those sets and events and all those people I've met, and I just. I haven't fit in anywhere. No one...likes me," you trail off so quietly, not really wanting him to hear.

"Sweetheart, that is not true."

"You don't know that, Buck,"

"Oh, and you do?"

"I do. That gig on Monday," you stammer, embarrassed, "it's stupid," you try to brush off, not wanting to have to explain the memory.

He doesn't have to say a word with the look on his face.

You sigh, but continue.

"We were in between takes and everyone was talking, like, to each other in a group. And I was there, but like, I wasn't there. I was standing with everyone else and trying to be...engaging. But," you purse your lips as the embarrassment burns you anew. "And, they were talking about their plans for Halloween, and this girl said she was throwing a party, and she invited everyone, asked for their numbers so she could send them the information, and she got everyone's number. Except for mine. And I was just standing there, like, probably looking so lame," you try to laugh as your eyes sting, "pretending like I didn't notice, nonchalant," you breathe tightly, pulling at a loose thread on the little V of his henley.

"I followed some of the other people online for like, 'connections', ya know, for future work, and one of them posted pictures from the party, and like, everybody from that set was there. And it looked like so much fun. And, you know I don't even like parties," you throw out, "but...why wasn't I invited? Why," you pause, biting your tongue, "why didn't they like me?"

"Baby," Bucky coos, his touch featherlight and yet so stabilizing, "those are just a few people,"

"That wasn't an isolated incident, Bucky. That has been my entire life. I try not to let it bother me, but I try. So hard, I try to be...normal. Likeable. Friendly. And no matter what I do, or how well I think I play the part, I'm just a mess of introversion and social anxiety."

You can see how badly he wants to interrupt you and reassure you of your so-called perfection, but he doesn't. He lets you talk; he wants to hear you.

"You know how many parties I was invited to in school?" you ask rhetorically. "Not a single one. And the people I thought were my friends wer-" you shake your head. "I'd always try to console myself with the thought that it would get better as I got older, but I think...I think it actually hurts more now than it ever did back then. The nerds were friends with the nerds, and the popular kids were friends with the popular kids, and everybody had their group. But even in my 'group', I was just kinda there. Not alone, but alone. Fading into the background. Into the gray."

You sit in quiet for a long moment before continuing.

"But then I'd get home. And I'd be with my sisters, and all of a sudden I wasn't alone. And I was, like, really me. For forever, they were the only people who ever really, truly saw me. Who I was comfortable enough with to be myself," you turn into Bucky further, your hand still on his chest.

"Then I met you," you smile. "And I don't know how or why, but you see me."

"In technicolor," he whispers as he lets his knuckles brush your cheek. You close your eyes at his soft touch, melting further into him.

"I've just been feeling excluded, and then I start missing my sisters even more, and you know I love you, so much, but this job is just constant rejection and it all just piles on and I keep trying to get by without having to dwell on it all, but I know I can't keep doing that. I know I want to be here. And I can do this. It just, gets hard sometimes. And I've been getting in my head. And I'm sorry I haven't talked about it sooner. I don't want it to seem like I regret moving here, and I really don't want it to seem like I'm not so grateful that you're here with me. That you came all this way for me. It means the world; you mean the world to me."

"The feeling is mutual," Bucky simpers, the corner of his lips turning up as he watches you, his hand aimlessly wandering up and down your side. "I'd go anywhere with you, sweetheart. I know it's not the same, but for what it's worth, I like you. I'd want you at every party."

You smile at him as he cuddles you and can't help the fit of laughter that erupts from you as he squeezes you, nuzzling into your neck and peppering kisses along your delicate skin.

You catch your breath as he finally lets up and pulls away, only to lean his face closer to yours, kissing you softly.

"I'm really proud of you, you know. You're a lot stronger, and a lot braver than you give yourself credit for. And anyone would be lucky to be able to have you in their life, let alone to call you their friend. As your best friend, I should know," he adds playfully.

"You're my best friend?"

"And you're mine," he nods, eyes gleaming with that look that sends butterflies a flight in your tummy. Your eyes flick down to his lips for less than a second before he's kissing you again; just as soft, and twice as sweet.

"I love you," he murmurs.

"Iloveyou," you mumble back, just a little dumb from the depth of his kiss. You give yourselves a moment in your shared embrace before you speak again. "Okay," you sigh, "we gotta finish the yard so I can facetime the girls before they head out for trick or treating."

Bucky rolls off the couch before pulling you up after him as you extend your arm expectantly.

You’re surprised as Bucky’s hold doesn’t let up and he tugs you into him. You stare at him, eyes wide and curious.

“I’m sorry you’ve been feeling bad lately. Whatever you wanna do tonight, and tomorrow,” he emphasizes as you smile demurely, “you got it.”

“Because that wasn’t gonna happen anyway?” You tease, earning a smirk from him as you reach for his hand to drag him to the front of the house.

You pause in your path and spin to go grab your favorite little ghost decoration from the steps.

“I know exactly where this is going.”

—

The familiar ring of the Facetime call has you growing more and more giddy with anticipation as you wait your sister's answer.

But the longer you wait, the more fallen your smile becomes.

Your FaceTime isn't answered, but not too long after, your phone dings with a text.

The girls went trick or treating early, no connection. Sorry! Try to call you back later. But send pics of the yard whenever! We need to see!

You deflate at the news. You guys had planned this, they knew how excited you were to show the girls the house yourself - or as close as you could get. Stuff happens, and by now you've come to accept that when it comes to kids, plans rarely ever play out the way you'd like. But still.

You sigh as Bucky watches you intently, noticing your shift in mood instantly. You can already see how the rest of the night will go. They'll get back from trick or treating and try to call, but you'll inevitably miss it, and once you do get another moment to call back, the girls will already be asleep. Pics will be it.

And that's...okay. You're disappointed, of course, but really, it's okay. You’re sure had you not talked to Bucky about how you’d been feeling lately, you’d be in tears right about now. But having gotten some of your frustration and anxiety out has helped. Just being around him has helped. You didn’t realize before that you’d been in and out of the house all week with classes and work and now that you think about it, this is the first day you’ve been able to spend actual time with Bucky, too. No wonder you were feeling so isolated.

"Can't talk right now?" Bucky asks as he steps closer to you in the front yard.

"Nope," you pop the 'p'. "Trick or treating early. I'm just gonna send 'em some pictures I guess."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," he tries to comfort you, pulling you into his side as you both look on at the Halloween decorations littering the yard. "I know you wanted to share it with them."

"'S'okay," you smile a small smile, leaning into him. "I still had fun doing this with you. Thank you for your assistance," you add, fluttering your gaze up to meet his.

"Anytime. Anything to see that smile,” he adds, leaning in to place a quick kiss on your cheek, sending warmth through you at the affection.

“Guess we should get the candy ready,” you muse.

“And your costume on.”

“I didn’t pick anything,” you frown. “I don’t really feel like dressing up anyway. Besides,” you turn into him, “all the kids, and moms, are coming to see you,” you nudge him with a smirk on your lips.

He shakes his head, trying to fight his blush as he rolls his eyes at you. “You’re never gonna let me live that down, are you?”

You laugh at the memory of your first week here; everyday was a new woman coming over under the guise of welcoming the new neighbors to the neighborhood. You knew after the second platter of unexpected cookies that word was spreading fast about a certain super soldier taking up residence in their lovely - and expensive - neighborhood; you had sworn to Bucky you didn’t need to move into a place so big, and a part of you was worried you wouldn’t be able to pull your weight financially if you did, but he swore he would prefer it. You didn’t necessarily believe that was his only reason for wanting to spend more on a nicer place, but how could you argue? Especially after he made it clear that he wouldn’t be accepting any money from you for rent. He let you connect your card for the monthly water bill, but that has been it. And you’re absolutely not complaining! But you don’t know you ever imagined this kind of thing would happen.

Until the very day you moved in, you were constantly thinking you were dreaming. But when you noticed the watchful eyes of the neighbors as you brought your boxes in, you realized it couldn’t be.

This was real.

You couldn’t blame their curiosity, but you could blame their forwardness. The way they fawned over Bucky in front of you - all the while ignoring your eye when they’d come over to introduce themselves - was both irksome and, kind of funny.

You only really started to get annoyed when you noticed how uncomfortable it was making Bucky. At the first sign of his discomfort, you found yourself ushering the door shut with a new, outlandish lie every time. But always thanking them for their treats, of course, as you’d close the door.

It’s been almost seven months since you moved in, and the fascination with Bucky has waned slightly, but has yet to fade completely.

“Never,” you laugh. “But it’s not like it’s a bad thing. You, my love," you take his face in your hands, his stubble rough against your palms, "are very, very handsome,” you murmur. “And mysterious, and brooding to the outside eye. It’s hard to ignore you. You're like a magnet of intrigue. It's sexy.”

“Sexy?” He huffs. “I’m not brooding.”

You scoff, “Hah, I wish you could see your face right now,” you say disbelieving; the irony of his words obvious as the furrow of his brows and his frown cause your lips to twitch in a soft smirk.

He fixes his face at your laugh, eyeing you with that ever familiar glimmer of growing want. His hands cover yours as he walks you back, closer to the house.

"So, you think I'm sexy?" he speaks lowly, his grip on you firm as he slides your hands from his face to his chest, down his thick torso as you watch him - your eyes growing heavy as you watch him. It's like you're in a trance.

Your back suddenly hits the front door and you're snapped out of your state, surprised by the contact and even more by the distance you've walked in what felt like a second.

"Yes," you utter after a second, Bucky pressing closer. "I do." Your fingers flex against his abdomen as he leans into you. His nose brushes yours as he teases you with the prospect of his kiss until the door unexpectedly opens behind you; Bucky having turned the knob with his metal hand from around you.

You gasp at the loss of contact with the door, inching back despite yourself - worrying for a split second you were about to find yourself on your ass. But in the same instant, Bucky's hands are around you, keeping you in place.

"I got you," he reassures you; voice deeper now than it was a second ago.

You can only nod as you’re caught once again in his crystal blue gaze.

You really should expect it when he picks you up, but you gasp anyway at his easy display of strength when he takes you off your feet and carries you inside.

“It’s a good thing you don’t have a costume, actually,” he says as he walks past the couch toward the stairs. “No need for you to be dressed.”

You nearly scream as Bucky bounds up the steps, holding you securely with a grin plastered on his face as you cling to him. Not a second later he’s walking you into the bedroom and setting you down carefully to sit on the bed.

“If we’re handing out candy, I’m gonna need to be dressed,” you point out the obvious, trying your best to not look so flustered as he stands in front of you. Tall, strong, and imposing; his eyes darkened as he holds your gaze. You take in a nervous breath as you look up at him and he takes a step closer. You lean back on your arms and wait for his next move.

Bucky slows gets to his knees before you and just as he reaches for your hips to pull you closer to him - there’s a knock on the front door.

He squeezes his eyes shut in his temporary disappointment, grimacing before he shoots up. “I knew that was gonna happen,” he sighs, earning a breathy laugh from you.

“Already got a better turnout than last year,” you offer despite your own momentary disappointment.

He shakes his head with a soft smile as he takes you in. “Nothing could ever beat the turnout last year,” he says thoughtfully, “not by a long shot.”

You smile softly at his meaning as he turns to head back downstairs and get the door.

You hear him open the kitchen cabinet where the candy bars are and then hear his ‘Happy Halloween’ greeting. By the sounds of it, there must be a group or two of trick or treaters already out there.

You ponder your options for a quick second before deciding to go with your gut. You know he won’t mind having to get the door himself tonight for all the trick or treaters - especially if you’re not dressed to do so yourself.

You open the middle drawer of your dresser and spot the red lingerie set instantly. It is your anniversary after all…

You and Bucky agreed to call November 1st your anniversary, just for celebration sake, but you know the truth.

Your thoughts catch up with you as you quickly strip and mindlessly slide on the lacy underwear and bra.

Your anniversary. Duh! You wondered why you hadn’t seen much of Bucky this week! He’s usually so attentive and when he’s not working on his bike or car or catching up on the many items of his list to read/watch/listen to, he’s wrapped up in you. Retiree life has been good to him, and you’ve never had to vie for his attention or affection. This week though, he has clearly been preoccupied. And now you realize why. He’s up to something…

You drag the stockings up your legs and pray they stay up your thick thighs for long enough as you hear the door downstairs shut. You curse under your breath but are quickly saved by another knock at the door before Bucky even heads back up the steps. You forget looking for the straps that connect the faux garter to the underwear and head for the bathroom to make sure you don’t look insane.

You fix your hair a bit, but the worn look suits the occasion and the slightly smudged liner adds to the sex appeal. You adjust the bra strap on your shoulder and a flicker of a smile forms on your lips. You look good. A renewed sense of giddy finds you as you spin to the door and walk back into the room. You listen for Bucky downstairs and are satisfied as you hear the last “thank you!” from the kids at the door.

You walk out into the hall and stop at the top of the staircase. You can see Bucky from where you stand and he’s able to see you from downstairs, too. You put a hand on the banister, posing just a bit as you wait patiently for him to turn around. You watch as he sets the bowl on the entryway table and turns quickly to get back upstairs.

He stops dead in his tracks the second he spots you. His mouth parting as he stares at your chest, slowly letting his eyes rove over your scantily clad curves and down your legs before he looks back up and meets your wanton gaze. The look of faux innocence playing on your face only riling him up more.

It feels like a play of cat and mouse as you stand at the top of the stairs and he stands at the bottom. His gaze heated, eyes hungry.

“You coming back up or should I meet you down there?” you ask demurely.

He’s cut off from answering you with a new knock on the door. He nearly growls and you could laugh at how differently his experience with trick or treaters - or lack there of - was last year.

Bucky turns back to get the door, putting on a smile as he greets the new group of kids and lets them choose what candy bar they’d like. For his part, he really is happy the neighborhood kids aren’t scared of him here! But at the same time, it’s technically his anniversary; and the love of his life is dressed in nothing more than his favorite lingerie, waiting for him so fucking prettily right up those stairs.

He doesn’t think much before making his decision. The last kid makes their choice and the group is on their way as he shuts the door. He heads into the kitchen, feeling you watch him quizzically. He tears a piece of paper off of the notepad on the counter and gets a sharpie from the kitchen drawer.

PLEASE TAKE ONE

He writes it in all caps and heads back to the door.

You lean more onto the banister to see what he’s doing from where you stand. You raise a brow as he moves the entryway table closer to the door before he opens it and sets it outside with the candy bowl sitting on top of it. That’s one way to do it, you think with a smile tugging at your lips.

Bucky slips the piece of paper under the edge of the bowl so it’s visible and then comes right back inside. He’s coming up the stairs within seconds and heading right for you.

You laugh in surprise as Bucky grabs you by the waist, pulling you close to him. His eyes are heavy as his hands squeeze you, wandering your curves. You almost moan when he grabs your ass, pulling you into him fully as you brace against his solid chest.

You’ll never get over how good it feels to be felt by him. His strength evident in his every touch, and yet so soft as he caresses you. His lips ghost your cheek and your ear as he breathes you in and you arch into him, wanting - needing more.

His fingers begin to play with the lace of your bra band, tickling you as he does. “My favorite,” he husks lowly, kissing your neck and sending a shiver through you as you pull at his shirt. “Special occasion?” he asks with a smirk.

Your hands find the waist of his pants, “None that I can think of,” you pretend to ponder.

You moan into him as Bucky suddenly kisses you hard. What you expect to be hot and fervent slows to something deeper and more intimate as you melt into him.

You inevitably have to pull away for air after a bit and murmur against his lips as he holds you, “Oh, right,” you breathe, “we have our anniversary.”

“Thought you wanted to call it tomorrow,” he smiles.

You lick your lip lightly with a shrug, “Couldn’t wait.”

His answer is another searing kiss as he walks you back toward the room. You’re pushed onto the bed and find yourself in the same position you were earlier, leaning back on your hands as you watch Bucky watching you.

He reaches down with one hand and undoes his belt effortlessly, popping his button and sliding down the zipper before he pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it aside, kicking off his boots right after. His pants are next before he closes in on you, crawling on top of you as you lay back on the bed, eyes still locked and dark with your mutual desire.

His hands trail from your hips, up the curve of your waist as he positions himself between your spread thighs.

“You’re so perfect,” he murmurs, more to himself than to you as he lets his eyes wander your body once more. He leans down and earns a breathy gasp from you as he starts placing soft kisses down your neck, your chest, over the tops of your breasts before he takes hold of the clasp of the bra sitting on your sternum.

He undoes it easy and pushes the cups to the side, revealing you to him. You sit up a bit to shimmy out of the garment and throw it off the bed. His large hands hold your breasts and he plays with you, squeezing and running his thumbs over your already peaked nipples - earning a pathetic mewl from you at the sensation it send through you. His lips wrap around your tit, tongue swirling around your sensitive nipple as he sucks at you, sending your eyes back and your hands grasping his grown out hair. Your lips parting in a silent gasp.

He licks and sucks at your tit, big hand playing with the other until he switches his attentions. All the while, your moans and tugs at his hair have him growing impossibly harder as his cock strains against his briefs.

He mindlessly grinds his hips against you and you whimper. “Please, Bucky,” you whine, trying to roll your hips against him in turn.

He sucks a little more on your tit before he moves down your body, leaving a trail of kisses in his wake. You’re partly surprised he listened to your ambiguous plea without teasing you just a little longer, but as his fingers pull at the band of your underwear, you realize he’s just as desperate as you.

It has been a long week; the longest you’ve gone without each other in the year you’ve been together.

Bucky pulls away to rid himself of his briefs, his thick cock hard and angry. You can practically feel your mouth salivate as the slickness between your thighs grows. Fuck, he’s perfect.

“Need it, Buck. Need you,” you plead, spreading your thighs even further as he leans back into you.

“I know, sweetheart,” he teases his cock head along your slit, “gonna give it to you, baby. Gonna give you what you need,” he promises.

He lines himself up to your entrance, pushing his tip just inside of you as you moan on a heavy breath.

You hum your pleasure, a delighted smile gracing your lips as he slowly pushes further in; his deep, heady breaths turning you on even more as his hands grip your hips.

“Feel good, doll?” He husks. “You’re squeezin’ me so tight,” he grunts. “Perfect fuckin fit,” he grits through his clenched jaw as he fucks you, his thickness stretching you with every thrust of his cock. Your walls clench his length as you moan - the feeling of being full of him, of his heavy balls slapping against your skin, the way his dirty words always set you off more than you’d ever expect… This is pure fucking heaven. You can’t help yourself. It's not very long before you find yourself already feeling so dangerously close to your undoing.

“Like you were made for me,” he growls, “made to take my fat fuckin cock just. like. this.” He punctuates each of his last few words with a hard thrust, hitting so deep you swear you’re seeing stars. You can do nothing but babble your agreement as your hands wander his body, one wandering back into the dark strands of his hair.

As much as you love holding him, you know how much he likes the feeling of you tugging at his growing strands, too; so you do just that.

His lips brush along your jaw as you tilt your head for him. His stubble tickling you in the best way.

“Never gonna get over how fucking good you feel wrapped around me. How goddamn beautiful you look under me. Fucked out and cock drunk the minute I get my dick inside your tight little pussy. Always so fucking wet for me, desperate for it.”

You swear you’re on the verge of tears as the coil in your tummy tightens more and more with his every word. Your legs are around him as he rolls his hips into you, his cock brushing all the right spots as he finds your lips. You’re moaning into his hot mouth as he kisses you. In sharp contrast to his words, it’s soft and sweet, his nose rubbing against yours as he moves his tongue expertly. His teeth gently nip at your lips as he pulls his face away for a second before pressing his forehead to yours. His hands are tight on your hips as he tries to control himself from getting carried away. A week is just too long and you’re both already reaching closer and closer to your ends.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he groans, sounding almost pained as his eyes squeeze shut, his thrusts growing the slightest bit erratic as you feel him tense above you.

“Come inside me,” you beg on a whimper. “Please, please,” you mewl. “Wanna feel you. Need it.”

The growl of curses that leave him as he fucks you deeper have your muscles tensing, your velvety walls clenching down around his length as the hair on his pelvis stimulates your sensitive clit with every roll of his hips. You’re a mess of moans and heady gasps as you cling to him, your body tight in the impossibly building pleasure as your toes curl and that coil finally snaps; white hot heat and sparks of overwhelming pleasure taking over you as you cum.

“Fuck,” Bucky moans, “that’s it, baby. So fuckin’ good. Look at you, so pretty coming for me,” he kisses you sloppily as your skin burns and your pussy flutters.

Your orgasm seems never ending as Bucky works you through it. His hands grasp at you, feeling your softness and bringing him closer to his own orgasm as your walls squeeze his cock while you cum.

His lips press to yours as he swallows your wanton sounds, kissing you hotly before licking into your mouth sensually. He keeps one hand on your hip to hold you where he needs you and brings the other to hold your face. He can’t get enough of your lips, your kiss, your taste. All the while rocking his hips into yours, his cock moving in and out of your slick, tight hole.

The pulsing of your sensitive walls around his length finally have him cumming hard. His seed hot and thick, spurting along your walls as he fills you up. Your name is both a curse and a prayer as it falls from his lips amidst sweet praises and filthy words. You’re panting and smiling through the growing overstimulation as Bucky’s thrusts slow but don’t completely stop just yet. His thumb brushes your cheek as he presses his forehead to yours again, his brilliant blue eyes glued to you before he leans in to brush his lips against yours.

You kiss him back, holding him to you with a hand still in his hair. Your kiss grows deeper as he thrust just once or twice more before stilling; his lips so soft as he slowly pulls away, breathing heavily.

He hisses so quietly you almost don’t hear it while he slides out of you at last, leaving you a dripping mess in his wake.

You stare at him as he looks entranced by the sight of your orgasms smeared all over you. You take a sharp breath as he gingerly brings two fingers to your cunt, slipping inside you easily and fucking what he can of his excess back into you. You expect him to stop but he just doesn’t.

He works his thick digits in and out, his mouth parted open and his eyes set on the way you suck him in so easily. You whine at the building pressure as he finger fucks you, already too close to another orgasm. Your hand is holding his strong arm as your eyes threaten to roll back.

“Bucky,” you whimper, “fuck, I’m gonna come again.”

Your words spur him on as he moves more precisely, hitting exactly where he knows you need him to. With his free hand, he brings his thumb to your clit and rubs in tight circles as your voice peaks and your legs shake. You’re nearly blinded by the orgasm as it hits you and the sound of Bucky cursing makes its way to your ears. You weren’t expecting it but as Bucky shakes his fingers inside you, prolonging your high like it’s the only thing in the world he’s concerned with - your pleasure, you - you realize you’re practically gushing as you squirt all over his fingers. You hear his voice but not his words as Bucky talks you through it.

It’s not the first time you’ve come so hard at his whim, but fuck, you’re exhausted as you slowly come down. You whimpered despite yourself as you open your eyes and Bucky gently slips out of you. He leans over you again as you gaze dizzily at him before he kisses you delicately.

“Did so good, sweetheart,” he mumbles against your skin, planting a sweet kiss on your cheek before he gets up off the bed completely.

You lie there, trying to recoup and catch your breath until he comes back not long after, a pair of his sweats low on his hips and a damp cloth in his hand, a glass of water in the other.

He sets the glass down on the bedside table before tending to you. He wipes gently at the mess between your legs, cleaning you up with the warm cloth before discarding it with the clothes and coming to sit next to where you lay.

“You okay?” He asks, that ever present concern evident in his voice as his hands gently start to wander your soft body.

You smile and nod at him, taking one of his hands in yours. “Better than okay,” you simper. “Was not expecting that,” you add, “but god.” You sit up and cling to him, resting your head on his shoulder. “That’s one way to celebrate a year.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” he laughs, turning to stand and pull you off the bed with him, “that wasn’t even the celebration.”

You smile and walk slowly to the closet to grab a night shirt, slipping it on before grabbing a pair of panties from your drawer. “I knew you were planning something,” you eye him playfully, coming up to wrap your arms around him.

He smirks, hugging you back for a second before just deciding to lift you up. “You get so cuddly after sex,” he laughs.

“Me?!” you laugh out, hugging onto him as he walks toward the door of your bedroom, “take a look in the mirror, buddy.”

“Fine,” he agrees, starting down the steps, “you’re right, we both do.”

“That’s just good compatibility,” you muse as he walks you into the den.

“Great compatibility,” he one ups. “It’s almost like,” he pauses a second, setting you down on the oversized sleeper chaise before he leans down to you, “we were made for each other.”

You lean up to meet his lips in a quick, gentle kiss. “Yeah,” you agree softly, a smile beginning to form on your lips. You bite your lip as you watch him go back out toward the front living room. He peeks out the window to make sure no one’s out there before he opens the door.

There's a pause as he takes in the scene outside...or lack thereof. “The candy’s gone!” He yells to you in disbelief.

You can’t help your snicker as he turns to look at you across the way, empty bowl in hand. He waves it, still seeming in shock; like this possibility never crossed his mind.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” you laugh, “but good thing you have like twelve more cases,” you remind him. He licks his lips as he stares at the empty bowl, shaking his head slightly. A second later, you see his brow raise as he starts to straighten up, but you aren't sure what he's reacting to until you hear her voice.

“Trick or treat,” a sultry voice comes from behind Bucky as he still stands at the open door. His eyes widen before he sighs, slowly turning to face the most persistent of his neighborly admirers.

You quirk a brow at her lack of company and strain to hear better.

“Sorry to bother,” she smiles, eyes dragging down Bucky’s solid - still shirtless - chest before she manages to rein herself in and snap her gaze back up to his. “I’m in the middle of mixing up some cookie dough but I ran out of flour. Paul and Michael are busy running their fun house or I’d have them go grab me a bag. Do you think you’d be able to lend me a cup?” You are slightly irked at the change of tone in her last question. She sounds flirty and though Bucky is mostly blocking her from your view, from what you can see, it seems like she’s leaning in closer to him. “We just had a rush of trick or treaters but it’s so quiet around here now. Paul’s so preoccupied with that set up though, I don’t even think he’d notice if I went missing,” she laughs, her toothy grin rubbing you the wrong way as her lashes flutter.

“Uh,” Bucky clears his throat awkwardly, “yeah, we probably have some flour we can spare. Give me a minute.”

“Oh, yo-“ she takes a step forward with her words but is cut off by the closing of the door.

You get up with a tilt of your head and follow Bucky into the kitchen quickly. “Did she just hit on you?” you ask incredulously.

Bucky eyes you as he sets the empty bowl on the counter and walks to the cabinet. “I could see how you could think that,” he avoids a real answer through his embarrassment.

You huff a laugh, walking to the drawer you keep the measuring cups in, grabbing the cup, smirking. “She is somethin’ else.” You sidle up to Bucky as he opens the jar of flour. You lean into him, holding out the cup for him to take, “But, I guess, who can blame her? You know what they say, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

Bucky chuckles with a roll of his eyes as he grabs it from you, scooping up the cup of flour. You’re confused as he tries to hand the cup back to you.

“What?”

“Go give it to her,” he nudges you.

“I’m not wearing pants,” you state the obvious.

“I don’t have a shirt on,” he argues.

“She already saw you,” you nudge him back with a titter.

“Please,” he breathes a light laugh, but you see the seriousness of his request in his eyes. His discomfort is evident, and you don’t know how you didn’t recognize it earlier.

You don’t know everything he went through, but you know enough to know how important Bucky’s privacy is to him - and that includes physically. He is the only one who should be able to decide who sees him, when, and how much of him they see. Of course, no one should be treated like an object, but you get the feeling it can feel a lot worse for Bucky than it can for the typical person.

You take the cup with a soft smile, “Okay, yeah,” you acquiesce. “You should open another box while you’re at it,” you nod toward the cabinet where the boxes of candy bars are before turning around to get the door.

You open it with a smile, trying to hide your bare legs with the door as you hold out the cup of flour. “There you go,” you offer.

“Oh! I didn’t, ha-“ she laughs lightly, “didn’t even realize you were home.” She looks down, moving some hair behind her ears before she reaches for the cup.

You smile brighter as you take a step from behind the door. “Yeah,” you say simply. What the hell does she mean she didn't think you were home?

“Well, thank you,” she smiles tightly, trying to not look at your bare legs. The implication of your and Bucky’s lack of clothing, his messed hair, and your smudged makeup all hanging in the air. “Happy Halloween,” she adds before turning around and heading back down the path.

“Mhm, Happy Halloween,” you return before shutting the door. Unbelievable. But you know you have less than nothing to worry about, so you let it go. Hopefully this interaction will finally be the one to get her off of Bucky's back.

You spin around and find Bucky behind you, eyes having been set on your ass as he holds the newly filled bowl of candy. His eyes shoot up to meet yours as you deprive him of the view. That heated gaze back in his ice blue eyes as he trails up and down your body again.

“See something you like?” You ask teasingly, popping a hip as you cross one leg in front of the other.

“Not something,” he swipes his tongue against his bottom lip unthinking, “everything.”

You go closer to him, a soft, flattered smile in place as you take the bowl of candy from him. “Why don’t you go pick a movie, and I’ll start on dinner in a minute.”

“I already ordered delivery, should be here in about half an hour.”

“Oh?” you raise a brow, reaching back to the door to put out the candy again.

“Mhm,” he hums, his hand in his pocket as he leans, watching you as you close the door shut and turn back to him.

“I thought you said we’d do whatever I wanna do tonight?”

“‘M sorry, doll,” he reaches a hand to you that you take, letting him tug you into him and walk you back into the den. “What do you wanna do?”

You try to bite down your smile as you get to the chaise, Bucky turning to look at you as he waits for your answer. You take the opportunity to slowly push him back, essentially guiding him down as your push had no real physical effect. He watches you with curious, patient eyes as he lets you lead until you bring yourself up to straddle him; his gaze darkening instantly as his hands find your waist, slowly feeling you down, fingers kneading your soft, plushy curves as he wanders down your hips, making his way to grabbing your ass.

You settle a little more comfortably on top of him, your hands on his chest before letting your fingers dance all over his thick torso. You smile, letting yourself answer simply and honestly.

“You.”

—

You’re cuddled up to Bucky as you lay on the chaise, bellies full and feeling satiated and satisfied - in every way. The blanket keeps you warm, but being this close to Bucky keeps you even warmer. You’ve run out of candy, and the porch lights are out as the Halloween classic plays on the screen before you - volume low as you and Bucky talk more than you watch the film.

“It’s kinda crazy when you think about it,” you say. “We’ve been together for essentially the entire time we’ve known each other. I’m surprised you haven’t gotten tired of me yet,” you laugh a little at yourself.

He looks you deep in the eye, a confused half smile on his lips as his brows furrow ever so slightly. “How could I ever get tired of you? You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, doll.”

You are taken aback, despite the commonplace of his adamant affection and feelings, at the intense sincerity of his words, the way he’s looking at you. Like he sees you.

Really see you.

Because he does. And somehow, for whatever reason…

“I love you,” he whispers, completing your thought without knowing it as he leans in to kiss you. Your noses brush as he kisses you softly, slow and delicate before it grows just that much deeper. You slow again and with a few lighter kisses, finally part to breathe properly, though you never leave his embrace.

“I’ve had a year with you,” he speaks softly, running his fingers up and down your arm, “and it’s been one of the best years of my life,” he measures his words before finishing his thought as you gaze up at him, “because of you. And I think I’m gonna need a lifetime more,” he decides, “at least.”

You can’t help your smile at his words as you nuzzle into him. “A lifetime, huh? ...I think I could be okay with that,” you say lowly, a teasing tone edging in your words.

You know you’d be okay with that.

Bucky’s heart skips a beat at your agreement and he grows a bit more excited for what he has planned for tomorrow. It all starts with breakfast, and if things go right, it’ll end with one very important question.

“Happy anniversary, Bucky,” you mumble into him as your eyes grow heavy. “I love you. So much. This has been a really perfect night,” you smile softly.

“Happy anniversary, sweetheart,” he kisses your head, holding you closer as you slowly drift off in his loving embrace.

Your gentle breathing calms the butterflies in his stomach at the thought of tomorrow. Any nerves can wait until then.

It’s been a year, and now he can’t wait for the rest of his life.

With you.

—-

a/n that no one asked for: thank you so much for reading! getting ahead of this now - there will not be a part three. this took so long to get through and i just can’t commit to any more sequels of anything. 😭 you are, of course, free to head canon what comes next however you’d like! though if you’re curious, in my mind these two get engaged the next day and idk maybe sometime around Christmas they find out they’re pregnant? but babies or no babies, work works out for reader and everything is good and lovely and they make friends and are able to see family more often and blah blah blah they live happily ever after! lol again, thank you very much for reading!🥰 let me know if you enjoyed it, feel free to share your thoughts. <3

[arjudy224]

Chemical Valley

(The Intern x Red Hood)

After the unsettling reminder of her past, Y/N has been avoiding vigilantes for the last few months. However, Dr. Harris has requested backup in the form of Gotham's newest crime lord. What could go wrong?

The Intern Collection:

Prequel: Death of a family

The Intern: Day one

The Intern: The Laughing Fish

The Intern: Busy Work

The Intern: Outreach Gala

The Intern: Visiting an old friend

The Intern: Chemical Valley

The Intern: Billionaire Boys Club

I'm getting real sick of risking my life for a minimum-wage job. Driving around with Dr. Harris is one thing, but since when did the job description list teaming up with crime lords? I mean it's the Red Hood for Christ's sake. Dr. Harris gives me a protective smile from the driver's seat.

"Don't worry about Red Hood. He knows what he's doing." He starts sensing my apprehension. "Besides, he owes me a favor."

I nod with a nervous smile. Red Hood is the only vigilante that I've never interacted with. He only recently appeared in Gotham. From what I've heard on the streets, he isn't exactly on great terms with Batman.

"All due respect... hasn't he killed people? " I question glancing around the lonely alleyway.

Growing silent, Harris contemplates his response.

"Not recently." He says with what is supposed to be a comforting pat on the shoulder.

Trying to ignore the anxiety creating knots across my gut, I reply with more enthusiasm than I feel.

"Oh well... that's progress."

Harris laughs.

"It's Gotham dear. It's hard to find someone who hasn't committed murder. I wouldn't worry too much about the Hood though. If you can befriend Waylon, a little boy in a helmet is the least of your worries. "

I raise an eyebrow.

"You wanna elaborate?"

He smiles sweetly. I narrow my eyes.

"Don't ask questions that you don't want to know the answers to."

That shuts me up. We sit in silence for a few minutes while I contemplate what he just said. Dr. Harris isn't exactly wrong... Glancing at the time clock on the dashboard, I frown. I guess vigilantes aren't known for being punctual, but at least Nightwing was on time. Considering our history, maybe we were both eager to see each other again. I try to focus on the cool air dusting across my face.

A swift knock causes me to jump. The infamous Red Hood almost cartoonishly waves at me from the outside the window. My nervous heart patters like a hummingbird. Eyeing his bike, I sigh. It was silent... Of course, it was silent. What kind of muffler does he have on that thing?

Harris rolls down the window.

"Good morning. Thank you for meeting us."

Leaning on the car door, Red Hood asks in a deep voice

"What do you have for me Dr.?"

"Routine inspection of Ace chemicals. Normally, I wouldn't worry about having a backup, but with an uptick in Joker sightings... I figured it would be better to be safe than sorry."

Hood nods, then glances in my direction.

"I'll keep an eye out."

"Y/N L/N," I say introducing myself, "But most people call me L/N."

"Weren't you the one who convinced the Riddler to let you go in exchange for inspecting his lair for asbestos?" Hood asks with a tone of pride.

I smile while shaking his hand. Word must get around quick.

"Yeah, that's me. He didn't even ask me any riddles. The poor man was terrified."

Dr. Harris whips his head around.

"Why haven't I heard about this?" He demands.

I flash him a shit-eating grin.

"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to Dr. Maybe Metropolis hasn't made me so soft after all."

Before he can start lecturing me, I step out of the car to face my new bodyguard. Keeping my eyes trained on the ground. I sidestep the hulking mammoth of a man.

"Thank you for dropping me off Dr., but I'm sure "Little" Red and I can take it from here."

From the Driver's seat, Harris watches me with a hint of pride.

"This is not the last time we will be discussing this."

"I look forward to the debrief," I remark as he pulls away.

The ACE chemicals manufacturing plant towers over the surrounding buildings. The smoke stacks excrete a dark sticky aerosol that trickles down from above. Its gothic structure makes it look like something out of a Tim Burton film. Taking a step near the external shutter, I drag my index finger across. My glove smears a damp power off revealing the old white paint. An uncomfortable sensation settles in my chest.

There is no way this amount of air pollution is legal.

After my second round of coughing, Red Hood offers me a disposable face mask. I gratefully take it. The neon green sign serves as a haunting reminder that somehow this has passed inspection. My eyebrows narrow. We passed several kids on the way here. What does that do to someone? No wonder Dr. Harris mentioned childhood asthma. I'm more concerned about the long-term exposure to industrial solvents.

Glancing at Red Hood, I state

"There is no way this is legal."

Red Hood stays quiet for a moment. Adjusting his helmet, he replies

"The law can be anything you want as long as you kill the inspectors who challenge you."

My mouth falls open. A thousand questions flood my mind.

"Somebody must have tried."

Hood tilts his head while glancing between us and the doors.

"Somebody did try."

Tossing me a key card over his shoulder, he continues, "You can visit them in Arkham if you want."

I flounder to catch the key card. It takes a few moments to register his words. Them as in more than one? Or is he concealing their identity? By the time my brain focuses, I stand in the alley alone staring up at a sign for a trading card company.

Isn't that where the Joker.... Oh hell no...

Stumbling through the stained doors, a bubbly man contrasts the bleak external welcome. As he rambles, I analyze the faded posters nailed to the wall. Dr. Harris briefly mentioned the factory's history of producing bioweapons during the Second World War. Hazardous feels like an understatement. I nodd along with the pleasant man, yet something in my gut tells me to keep my eyes and ears open.

Walking past a dust cloud, my lungs contract. Unable to steady myself, I sneak down a back hall to take my inhaler. The rambling man continues down the other hallway completely oblivious to my absence. I tear the disposable mask off my face. Searching my pockets for the familiar medication, my heart drops. Of course, I left it in the car.

I sink into a seated position once the dizziness sets in. Do. Not. Panic. We cannot do that again. No more emergency room trips. A pair of boots emerges from the shadows.

"Are you alright?"

I nodd while focusing on each labored breath.

"Sometimes, I really hate this city." I wheeze clutching my chest.

Red Hood lets out a dry laugh before taking a seat next to me.

"I have something that might help, but you have to trust me."

A small inhaler makes its way into my left hand. Squinting, a small Bat engraving stares up at me. I give him an incredulous glance. There is no fucking way that Batman has a pharmacy.

"It works. I promise."

Reluctantly, I take two puffs. We sit in silence for a few minutes. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. I relish the first full breath of air in days. My lungs expand completely. It is glorious.

"How is your friendship with Killer Croc?"

The immense pain that weighs on my chest lessens slightly.

"I'm sure Waylon wouldn't use the word friend. "

I open my eyes to look at him. Spots litter my vision. The sticky residue has left grime all over his mask. I hesitate.

"Waylon has lost everything... Everyone really. All he really needed was a friend."

Hood stays silent weighing out my words.

"What factory did they make you in?" He questions.

I can almost hear a smile in his voice.

"The same one that kicked you out for defects." I retort staring at the white paint peeling on the far left wall.

Considering the age of this building, I really hope that's not lead paint.

"Touché, Ms. Friendship. Touché"

I give him a friendly shove.

"You know, you aren't as bad as your reputation suggests."

He laughs climbing to his feet.

"I wouldn't go that far. Usually, I'm a dick."

"Better a dick than a sociopath," I say dusting off the black power on my pants.

"Damn Metropolis. Who have you been talking to?"

I shrug.

"It's Gotham. "

After a few moments of friendly silence, he asks

"You ready to find Mr. Optimistic?"

I nodd allowing him to pull me to my feet. Enjoying the comfortable silence, I open the door for him once we make it down the hall. To my surprise, Red Hood slams me against a wall before covering my mouth. Paralyzed in shock, I don't fight him. The Red Bat insignia stares at me. The soft aroma of his cologne catches me off guard. It's nice. Very musky. There's something so... familiar about it. I suddenly feel my face go red. There is no way I am evaluating how good a CRIMINAL smells. Get a grip girl.

Ignoring my mental crisis, Red Hood leads the two of us out the back door. Stumbling out the door behind him, I bend over holding my knees for stability. This is a lot of cardio for a regular inspection.

"What the hell was that about dude?" I hiss in between breaths.

Red Hood doesn't say anything.

"I know you are trying for the strong and silent type, but I think this partnership would benefit from open communication."

Standing up tall, a gunman aims a pistol directly at my temple.

Oh.. That's why.

Tag list: @nosyrobin, @jjsmeowthie, @epicy0n,@gaychaosgremlin, @rory-cakes, @luna-zendra-star

[leclarifies]

off the grid - IV

✰ max verstappen x !driver reader ✰

summary: you strived for nothing but perfection. nothing less was expected from you. being a female formula one driver made it even harder for you to make mistakes. you figured that dating max, your biggest rival yet, wasn't a mistake...right...?

genre: kinda slow-burn? mostly angst, eventual fluff at the end.

wc: 3k

a/n: short chapter bc i wanna focus on the pure fluff in the next chapter, this is just an insight on what happened between the two of them and how they reconciled, hope you like it!!!!! mixed a lil smau in there too

PREVIOUS PART ✰ NEXT PART MASTERLIST ✰ ASK ME ANYTHING ✰ REQUEST A FIC!

"i don't know what to do, i'm stuck in a loop, stuck in a loop. i don't know what to do, 'cause i fell in love with you." - chase atlantic, 'you'

"you look like shit," was the first thing lando said when he saw you, you blow him a raspberry and a stink-eye. you raked your hand through your hair as you exit your apartment, he had asked you to go to dinner with him with the other drivers and somehow, even with your big wage, you still didn't have a car so you needed to catch a ride with someone.

"thanks, i think the lack of sleep is finally getting to me," you say as you turn around and close the door behind you, locking the apartment door.

"you haven't been sleeping well?" lando asked curiously, now piqued by interest when you talked about your lack of sleep.

"no, i've been sleeping like shit and my performance is like shit and everything is like shit and all i want to do is sleep but i can't sleep. so cheers to me being a female formula one driver, right?" you asked lando sarcastically as you both started walking to the elevator.

"okay well... before the sleep problem, you've been doing well right? so why don't you go to the doctor and get some... sleeping pills or whatever?" lando asked as he pressed the button to the elevator, putting his hands in his pockets once he was done.

"mate, what the hell do you think i've been doing? i've been popping those pills like it's candy. it's not working," you huff, tonight was not something you were looking forward to. human interaction with more than one person drained your limited energy.

"maybe it's anxiety then?" lando suggested as you shrug, you didn't know what it was. you knew the root of the problem though, but you weren't going to share that with lando.

"fred is going to fire me at the end of this season, i can feel it," you heard the elevator ding and the doors open, it was an empty elevator thankfully.

"that's not fair though, checo's been having two shit seasons in a row but he's not getting fired by red bull," lando commented as both of you get in the elevator, and you shrug once again.

"ferrari is not red bull and checo isn't a female driver—"

a hand stops the elevator doors from closing and you see a familiar dutchman emerge from the doors opening.

"ah max! you live in the same building as y/n?" lando smiles politely at max, those two don't have the friendliest relationship but since the fiascos that happened in 2024.

max smiled at lando and flashed you a quick but polite smile as well, "ah yeah, i live across from her. did she not tell you that?" max asked as he entered the elevator doors as it finally closed, you didn't say anything. your eyes not even on the dutchman but on the doors behind him.

"well she never mentioned it, you're invited to the dinner as well right?" lando perked up when he realized that max did in fact live across from you, you just wanted out of this elevator for once.

"yes, which is why i'm also in this elevator with you, lando," max laughed before the three of you settled in, the elevator ride was short as you reached the basement floor where lando's car was parked and you assumed that max's was there as well.

after a moment of silence and exiting the elevator, max speaks up again, "why don't you guys ride with me? save some gas. i'll drive you home lando."

fuck.

lando had taken the back of max's valkyrie, wanting you to feel comfortable in the front, but what he was oblivious to was the tension between the two of you.

thank god the ride was quite short, you could've died from the tension if that car ride was any longer than ten minutes.

exiting the car was easier than getting inside of it, max's car keys was handed off to valet as the three of you walked inside of the restaurant.

"i think i'm gonna go to the toilet first, you guys go right ahead," lando announced, quickly rushing over to the toilet before you could protest.

your timing is so shit, lando...

max took the opportunity to talk to you, grabbing your hand before you had the chance of even entering the private room the drivers booked.

"can we talk?"

you turned to look at max who was holding your wrist gently, his blue orbs were clouded with something— you couldn't put your finger on it. he just looked so pitiful and sad.

"talk about what?" you ask as you gently tugged your wrist from his grip, crossing your arms in front of your chest. you were full expecting him to rub the issue in your face, that you needed him somehow to keep with your performance.

"you know what i'm talking about, don't act dumb," max looked away and glanced at the private room, knowing that this conversation will soon end after lando rejoins the two of you.

"i don't know what you're talking about," you shrug, feigning stupidity as you turn back around. thankfully max lets it go for now and lets you both enter the room with no more interruptions.

you're met with a table filled with energy, drivers, wives and girlfriends alike cheered as you guys entered the room, all with smiles and greetings.

you smiled politely and greeted everyone as best you could even with your limited energy and conversed with the others.

you were bracing yourself for a eventful night.

you had told everyone that you would retire early and max piped up if you wanted a drive home, but you opted for a walk instead. you wanted to clear your head. then again, the streets of monaco was quiet in the middle of the night.

somehow you found yourself at the start of where the track would've been if it was race week.

you imagined the race cars, the grumble, the cheers, the noise from all the things happening when it was race week.

you remembered the way people screamed when they found out you started on pole that week, the way the headlines wrote itself when you fought hard to get where you were. after two hard and long years in f1, you finally found your breakthrough.

"first woman to win a driver's championship with ferrari"

"first woman to take pole in formula one"

"first woman to score points in formula one"

"first woman to lead a championship"

first woman.

it was etched into your soul.

that monaco win was much needed for your self-esteem. you finally told yourself that maybe you deserved the ferrari, that you clawed your way to the top and you were deserving of all of these titles the fans gave you.

it was short-lived of course, all the other races afterwards were all individual pieces of shit that you couldn't control. whether it was having to do lico because of your overheating engine, or your inability to focus because you felt so tired, everything was going to shit as you reached the end of the season.

you knew the reason why, it was the night terrors that couldn't seem to stop and it made you be too scared to sleep, even with how tired you were.

you just couldn't bring yourself to fall back asleep.

but you knew that if you had just spent one night sleeping at max's—

no he's mad at you. you can't find comfort in him anymore.

your feet naturally followed the track, turn 1, turn 2, turn 3, before you knew it, you were almost back where you started.

it was a good walk, reminiscing of your win in monaco. it was an exhilarating experience, you would've retired right then and there if you could.

suddenly you feel someone following you, but you were too scared to turn around, to look at who it was. it was a bad idea walking the streets along at night, but you didn't particularly care at the moment.

"it's not good walking alone at night, especially if you're a woman," a familiar dutchman's voice rung behind you, you didn't turn around to look. you knew exactly who it was.

you wanted to chuckle at the irony, here you were being scared that a creepy old man wanted a piece of you, but it was the person that gave you the most comfort.

"i think it's creepier that you've been following me around," you say as you continue walking, not wanting to give him time of day, not wanting to hear what he had to say about you or your relationship together.

"i haven't, you didn't notice my car but i saw you walking around aimlessly and i decided to stop and catch you, i just finished dropping lando off," max tells you as he catches up next to you, walking alongside, "can we please talk?"

"i wasn't walking around aimlessly and like i said earlier, there's nothing to talk about," you scoff but that's where max grabs your arm, forcing you to look him in the eye.

you missed him, that was for sure. you didn't fight it this time, just letting him grab your arm as he wanted.

"you haven't been sleeping well," you didn't know how but he made that observation, you didn't want to have this conversation right now.

maybe it was the eyebags underneath your eyes, or maybe it was your performance. you were too scared to confront your feelings and actually say what you felt in front of him. it wasn't the fear that he didn't feel the same way, but what baggage expressing those same feelings would bring.

you were shifting from foot to foot, your eyes were nowhere near max, and then he did the thing.

"look at me when i'm talking to you, y/n," max said softly as he pulled you closer by the arm, hooking his finger underneath your chin to make you look at him, he often did that before when you straight up refused to look at him, "why didn't you come to me?"

"how could i come to you after breaking your heart like that?"

"i still care for you as a friend—"

"so you shut out friends like you did to me?" you ask, your eyes glassy now, tears were threatening to fall.

you were really scared now. you felt like shit after rejecting him like that even when you felt the same way. maybe you couldn't sleep because the fact of the matter was, you caused him heartbreak.

another burden for him to bare, another burden that you gave to him. you hated feeling like a burden to someone else and this was it, you gave that to him. you made him feel like shit and you knew it.

max sighed before looking away then back at you, "i was wrong for that, i just felt hurt. i thought you felt the same way and when monaco happened and you told me you didn't feel the same way, i was crushed."

you felt a drop in your stomach.

you did that to him.

you did that to a person that you cared about deeply.

then you told yourself,

maybe it's alright. maybe i should tell him i felt the same way.

what more pain could i bring other than indirectly telling him that i didn't feel the same way?

what more burden could i possibly bear to give him?

"who told you that i didn't feel the same way?"

"what?"

"i never said i didn't feel the same way, i just told you i was bad with words. i didn't know how to express myself and it hurt seeing you walk away like that when i didn't know what right words to say," you admitted those feelings from all those weeks ago, "i just didn't want to hurt you by the things i couldn't say."

max had that look you knew all to well, relief, excitement almost. he was happy, he thought for all these weeks that you genuinely didn't love him the way he loved you.

he beat himself up for those weeks, putting all of his soul into racing. never resting, never giving him time to think about what happened with you. he didn't want to think about it.

he put all of his energy into his races, making him win back to back to back, even with a "shitbox" (his words not mine). he didn't want to think about you, because if he did, he might've broken down mid-race.

"there were no bad things to say in that situation, you could've just told me how you felt," max breathed out, he was holding his breath before encasing you in a big hug, as if his worries were washed away by the excessive stress you have been giving him.

you stood there, arms gently wrapping around max, melting into the hug, you felt safe in his presence. he was someone that you could be quiet or loud with, someone who could just laugh together along with you over something stupid.

you missed this.

you missed him.

the way he smelt, the way he would touch you, the way he would treat you so gently, as if you could break if he was any rougher.

he took both of his hands and placed them— into your soul.

he was in love with you and he didn't want this night to end.

you placed a gentle kiss on his lips, "can you just take me home? i'm so tired, max."

"i'll take you home, schatje."

when you came to, you were in a pile of tangled limbs, your arms and legs entwined with max's. you spent the night at his, not wanting to return back to your mess of an apartment. you were greeted with polite meows when you did get back to his apartment, the cats happy to see you after so long even though you realistically weren't that far, only barriered between a few steps and a door.

you were the only one awake in his apartment, his cats happily snoozing at the end of the bed with max's face buried in your chest. he was holding you tightly, like you were going to disappear if he let go.

you wanted to chuckle at the thought of that.

you never felt like you meant this much to anyone, and now with max's admission of how he felt for you, you felt at peace for the first time in your life.

last night, he peppered you with kisses until you fell asleep in his arms, not wanting to let him go either. he was a precious man, and you needed to keep him safe at all costs.

your life had been so turbulent, all of the pushing for you to reach the top, all of the abuse you had to go through at home, all of the words you had to hear just because you were a woman when you were racing.

it felt nice to just have to worry about staying at the top.

then you realized, it was the first night you had experienced in the past few weeks that you didn't have a night terror, you slept like a sweet little baby.

your train of thoughts were stopped by a certain sleepy max waking up though.

"when did you wake up, schatje?" max asked, sleep still laced within his voice, you looked down to see a very sleepy max, his cats were starting to wake up too.

"just a few minutes ago, did you sleep well?" you asked max as he laughed before burying his face into your chest again, he shook his head.

"i think i should be asking you that, how do you feel?" max asked as he looked back up, cats now crawling and pawing at max for him to feed them you assumed, but you just planted a kiss on his forehead.

"i slept like a baby, it's the first time i didn't have to worry about night terrors," you told him before he gently untangled his limbs from yours, a soft meow came from sassy, a hungry one.

"we have break for the next three weeks, what do you want to do?" max asked as he sat up from his previous position, tousling with his hair as he always did.

you shrug, sitting up in a similar fashion, not really knowing what you wanted to do. three weeks of absolute freedom accompanied by max sounded like a beautiful experience, but you were just thinking about how well you could sleep, "i don't know, all i can think about is how i'm going to sleep in this bed for the next couple of weeks, i'm not going back to my apartment. maybe it's time for me to change my matress..."

you felt a shove from max, that's when you laughed.

"you slept like a baby thanks to me!" he huffed before pouting, you wished you could take a picture of his dumb face.

you continued laughing as you watch him exit his room and lead his cats to feed them some breakfast, you were surprised you woke up in a timely manner considering that you haven't slept well in weeks.

you decide to get up and start your day, there's isn't a day without starting, right?

max decides on a whim that he wants to plan an impromptu getaway in italy.

"why italy?"

"reminds me of your shit team."

"thanks for reminding me that i have a shit car this season."

yes, that was his reasoning. did you want to smack him? probably.

that's how you were on a jet with max, snoozing happily.

you've realized you haven't really checked your social media recently, you decide to open it up despite a lot of people telling you not to.

that's not good.

liked by 79,000 people.

f1gossip paparazzi pictures from italy has appeared, is that y/n with max verstappen? 0.o

click to view comments.

user1: do my eyes deceive me or is that actually y/n

user2: what are they doing in italy though?

user3: probably enjoying a vacation, why are we speculating their relationship tho,,,,?

user4: did you not slide to the second picture????

user3: yep, i just did. my bad

user5: they look kinda cute together, but do the fia not have regulations for workplace relationships???

user6: i wouldn't think of it if i were them ngl, no other woman has been on the grid before

user7: okay but max looks happy, what is the issue??

user8: yeah some people are in over their heads for no reason

user9: y/nstappen shippers, this is your time to rise.

user10: been here since day 1, they're late

user11: being late to your own ship is crazy

being called by ferrari and red bull simultaneously was a lot to handle.

"you guys have two options, either deny it and not show up in public or announce it," your pr manager had called you the first second you touched down in monaco, you were rubbing your temples and seeing max pace back and forth in the balcony, on a similar call with red bull pr relations.

"or i can just not address it you know, isn't that a good plan?" you scoff sarcastically as jessica tells you that it's a hard no. she tells you further that she wants this issue resolved tomorrow.

you end the call the same time max re-enters the apartment.

"so i think... i was given an ultimatum," max says, he looked a bit sheepish, scared even. you raise an eyebrow.

"announce it or deny right?"

"how'd you know?"

"jessica told me to do the same exact thing, she wants me to die," you groan and bury your head in the sofa throwpillows, you could feel max sit next to you and pat your head.

"well, what do you want to do now?" he asked as he softly gave you reassuring pats, as if to tell you, 'it's okay, i'm here'.

"die."

"y/n."

"BUT THAT'S WHAT I WANNA DO!" you fake-cry as you sit back up right and stare at him, "imagine, the first date we go on, we get caught by paps by me staring lovingly into your pretty blue eyes! kill me!"

"you have pretty eyes too, in your defense—"

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT MAX EMILIAN VERSTAPPEN!"

max holds his hands up in the air in defense before you groan back into your throwpillow, "can't i catch a break? my shitty car with my shittier personal life."

your voice was muffled against the throwpillow, max laughed before speaking up, "so you're saying i'm shitty?"

"no i'm saying my life is going shittily and there's nothing i can do about it," you continue burying your face into the pillow, only releasing yourself from the suffocating position when you needed air.

"you're fine. anyways, do you want me to do it or you do it?"

"ARE YOU CRAZY?"

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc, alexandrasaintmleux and 987,000 others!

yourusername this is me neither confirming nor denying to the allegations (also my pr manager forced me to do this!!!!!!!!!!) tagged: maxverstappen1

click to view comments.

maxverstappen1: I did not agree to this.

yourusername: do you want to die?

charles_leclerc: chat are we surprised?

user11: WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT?

georgerussell: um, yes we are!!!!!!

alexandrasaintmleux: i think you're the only one not surprised hun

alexandrasaintmleux: congrats love!

user12: the caption is crazy

user13: so the paps caught them when they didn't wanna be caught? that's so sad...

user14: i'm actually so happy for you!

oscarpiastri: Not something I expected for my 2025 bingo, but here we are.

user15: WHY DO YOU HAVE A BINGO IN THE FIRST PLACE?????

user16: can we please talk about this comment?

landonorris: So happy for you mate, was that what the tension was in the car? Sexual tension?

maxverstappen1: I know where you live :D

landonorris: That sounds like a vaguely worded threat.

user17: DHUAWHDNAHD???????/

user18: well good morning to you too y/n

yourusername: you think i wanted to do this??

user18: YOU REPLY???

yourusername: WHEN I AM FRUSTRATED, YES.

user18: i think i might die

yourusername: that's what i said to max when my pr manager called me to tell me to announce or deny the relationship.

user19: CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS PLEAAAAASSSSSEEEE>>>?<>?>?>

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 890,039 others.

maxverstappen1 Cheers to being exposed by paparazzi when we weren't ready, schatje. tagged: yourusername

click to view more comments.

yourusername: i look ugly in the second pic, pls delet :(

maxverstappen1: You look beautiful in every angle, please be quiet

yourusername: ???????

yourusername: ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH ME ON THE TIMELINE RN?

maxverstappen1: What are you gonna do about it?

yourusername: ??????????????????????

yourusername: 24 year old f1 driver, FOUND DEAD IN THE COMMENTS SECTION OF MAX VERSTAPPEN'S POST

landonorris: I wasn't expecting this

maxverstappen1: I still know where you live.

landonorris: Cheers mate!!

user20: oh my god my 433 crumbs

charles_leclerc: the fans can stop the allegations that you're in love with me now

maxverstappen1: Who said I can't love more than one driver?

charles_leclerc: this is where i run

alexandrasaintmleux: @/yourusername your boyfriend is flirting with mine again

yourusername: STOP FLIRTING IN THE COMMENTS SECTION

user21: this is so sweet :(

user22: they really love eachother, huh?

user23: plithhhh, i love the y/nstappen posts, keep em coming T___T

yourusername: i'll try!!!!!

user24: almost all the posts are of them kissing, god when is it my turn?

user25: I'M JEALOUS PLEASE Y/N DATE ME INSTEAD

yourusername: just pick a time and a place baby

user25: Y/N IS FLIRTING WITH ME OH YM GOF

maxverstappen1: Mine >:[

user25: OH MY OFD IM CRYUGN

taglist: @aadu2173 @chelseyyouraverageluigi thank you for enjoying this fic as much as i do writing it :3 just drop a comment if you want to be added to the taglist

[yayll]

15!Dazai gives me cute aggression 😔😔 i wanna give him kisses and hug him allll the time and watch as his brain just blue screens because he isn’t to affectionate like that or the fact anyone wants to give him affection lime that anyway 💔

this is sooooooo true anon and you SHOULD say it

here at yayll we like to recognize the touch starved wet cat this man is and 15!Dazai not only is that but when faced with genuine affection has no other concept of what to do with it than to mimic it back to you in odd ways should he ever feel the same way. and if he does? it's over for you.

you gave him an unexpected hug? he'll try and give you one back, only for it to be unreasonablly tight and awkward, almost like he's trying to strangle you (he isn't, but he is.)

one day you patted him on the shoulder and he never felt such sweet validation that went beyond verbal acknowledgement... so to show you his appreciation, he patted you as well! on your head... like a dog...

my fav is when you both are clearly aware of each other's feelings and are a thing because then it turns up his cute aggression by a LOT. after that he just does things. he rolls his eyes and huffs like he's soooo annoyed and self sufficient but is secretly smiling to himself (he's so dramatic and needy) he also touches and overall invades your personal space WAYYY more now. it's still awkward and oddly interpreted! but it has purpose, it has heart, and it also has you wondering how could Dazai POSSIBLY get worse than what he already was?

"Okay, I really have to go and report now! I'll get chewed out if I miss another meeting."

he just tightens his grip on your wrist and swings it around like you're both skipping across a field and totally not at mafia headquarters. He smirks as he dismissively croons.

"... Awww, look who's so punctual. I'm an executive, they'll be fine with it. Besides! the timer's not up yet."

(yes he has a timer that you force him to set up when you both cuddle otherwise he will NOT let you go the entire day. BOUNDARIES OR WHATEVER.)

"Er, actually the timer went off 5 minutes ago... you just snoozed it."

He glares at you, and shrugs.

"Oh, that timer? I thought you meant the other one."

"What other one, Osamu?"

"Did you just say my name? Ugh, that's so formal and so uncalled for. I'm adding 5 more minutes to the timer~"

he's secretly blushing so hard every time you address him so casually and directly, he'll think abt it alllll day and night.

it seems you truly created a monster, or maybe you created a safe space for him to be one. either way, he's yours! <3

[empressdrusilla]

‘Holy shit,’ you thought, ‘That’s a big fucking dog.’

KEE-RUNCH

You'd just gone around a blind curve maybe a little faster than you should've, and now you've immediately learned why you aren't supposed to do that, especially in the middle of the night.

You'd gotten about one second of time to process the canine form in the headlights of your Dodge Dakota, and recognize that it was, in fact, larger than most, before plowing into it and sending it skidding a few feet across the asphalt.

After a few seconds taken to make sure you weren't injured, you unbuckled your seatbelt and hopped out of the truck, crossing your fingers that whatever you'd just hit was somehow okay.

The creature that was laid out on the asphalt before you was, to your estimation, probably a wolf. You weren't an expert, and a couple things about it seemed... off, but mostly it looked like a wolf. It was massive, sure, and it sure looked like it was grinning at you, yeah, but it was grey and white and looked like pictures you'd seen of wolves, so. Probably. You didn't know any wolves lived here. Like. Anywhere near here. It must be lost. Oh boy.

It wasn't moving except for a little bit of breathing. It wasn't even whimpering or twitching or anything, so you probably had knocked it out cold. You check your phone, thinking you should probably call... somebody? A vet maybe? Animal control? You figured you'd look it up, but. No service. Okay. Shit. Well, you thought, I'll just bring it home, and put it in the garage or something, and give it some water, and then figure out what to do from there. Easy. Fine. It turns out, wolves that are larger than you are pretty heavy. Some part of you swears you almost hear it giggling at you as you struggle to lift it up, before resigning yourself to getting back in the truck (Which thankfully was still running seemingly fine enough), driving in front of it, putting a couple boards you had in the back down as a ramp, and sort of... rolling it up. You manage it, eventually, with some muscle, and some leverage from a third board.

There's something distinctly novel about the drive home. The circumstances aren't exactly fun, you're not happy about it, but you have to admit it's at least new to be driving home with a fucking wolf in the back of your truck. So at least a part of you is getting some entertainment from this. The sun is just starting to rise as you turn onto the road that leads to your place, lighting up the sky all pale orange. It was pretty, which only added to the odd ambiance. By the time you've pulled into your driveway, and put the truck in park, you've formulated a decently solid plan. You're gonna keep it in the back of your truck, since you're not gonna do all that again. You're gonna go inside, and get a bowl of water, and put it in with it. You don't expect it to wake up, but just in case. Then, once you've done that, you're gonna call an emergency vet that should be open at dawn, and ask what they can do about a wolf. Then, just do whatever they say. Easy. Simple. Everything was gonna be okay. What was distinctly not included in the plan was, upon exiting your truck and turning towards the back to check on your cargo, for there to be a naked middle-aged woman sitting there instead. She's leaning up against the side wall, with a mischievous grin on her face.

The woman has mostly-greyed hair, that'd maybe once been auburn, that falls around her shoulders. Weathered skin, like someone who spends a lot of time outside, deep brown eyes, and teeth that are just a little sharper-looking than most peoples'. For a second your heart skips a beat out of something other than surprise, seeing the gorgeous little crow's feet at the corners of her eyes as she grins at you. You open your mouth as if to speak, but nothing readily comes to mind. This is not helped when the woman vaults over the side of your truck, revealing to you her full body, landing solidly on her feet. She's very solidly built, a little shorter than you, but you'd wager a thousand times that she could beat you in any contest of strength you could think of. She also has a lot of body hair, all over. Chest, stomach, bush, leg, arm, a little facial, you name it. She was, in short, stunning. And your mind was going blank, because where the fuck did she come from?

"Well?" Says the woman, her voice warm and wonderfully deep, with a light Midwestern, maybe Minnesotan brogue to it. "You gonna invite your guest in? Could use a coat. You brought me home, after all." You are, quite frankly, too shocked to say no. There was no more wolf in the back of your truck. So you walked to your door, pushed in your keys, and opened.

werewolf who you hit with your pickup truck on a back road and you have no idea what the fuck they are but they seem pretty hurt so you get them into the truck bed to bring them home until you can figure out who the fuck you call in this situation

(they’re literally fine, they just think you’re cute and want to come home with you and pretending to be unconscious usually works when this happens)

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Pull the Thread

Fandom: Marvel (Mob Boss AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Summary: You and Bucky used to be so in love and so… ignorant of the roles you had to play, which lead to you breaking up. But that didn’t seem to keep you away from each other since you now act as Bucky’s nurse whenever he gets hurt. Based off my mini fic here.

Warnings: mentions of child death

Stitched Together | Bucky Barnes Masterlist

When you wake the next morning, Bucky and Sam are gone. Their sleeping areas are made up and a note is left on your kitchen counter.

Thanks again.

See you around.

-B

PS. call me if you ever need anything

Beside it is a cup of coffee and a stack of bills. You count it out and chuckle in disbelief. Bucky left you two hundred dollars for helping him out.

You grab your phone and type in Bucky's number. You insert a picture of the money along with the text:

You: you didn't have to pay me.

Bucky: I wanted to. For disturbing your night and for your work.

You: It's fine, but thanks anyway.

Bucky: Hope you have a good day, sweetheart. :)

You pause. Sweetheart. You can't help the way your heart beats a little faster when you read that word. He used to call you that when you two were dating. It was never "babe" or "honey". Always "sweetheart".

You feel conflicted. You want to scold him for calling you that...but you also really miss being called that by him.

You decide to not respond back at all, since you still need to eat before you head into work.

_____________

Bucky shows up at your place again a few nights later. This time, he's alone and with a bullet graze on his side.

You frown at him as you let him into your apartment, "Is this going to be a habit of yours?"

He snorts, "You think I purposely get hurt just to come and see you?"

You shrug, "I don't know, Buck! We don't really know each other anymore, so I'm not sure what you'd do!" you snap at him. He looks at you with surprise and you sigh, "Sorry. It's been a long day and I wasn't expecting you."

"I can go. I'll-I can find someone else to help me."

"No. You're here already. Might as well get it over with." You gesture to the couch and he sits down as he waits for you to come back with your first aid kit.

Bucky starts to rethink things. It's true that he didn't purposefully get shot at so he can see you. But he definitely didn't hesitate to start heading to your place as soon as things were handled. He just misses you.

You come back with gloves on. You have Bucky take off his shirt so you can fully assess the wound. Just a bullet graze. He lays on his other side as you clean his wound.

Again, you work in silence. You're focused on getting this done quickly and efficiently so you can go to sleep.

As you dress his wound, you say, "You should get some antibiotics or pain relievers so it doesn't get infected or if the pain becomes too much. Change the dressing often. Make sure there's minimal movement."

He nods, "Alright. I can do that."

You help him sit up and pull his shirt back on.

Once he's dressed, Bucky looks up at you, "Maybe you and I could make an arrangement."

You look at him with a cocked brow and he stammers “Not that kind of arrangement! Business! Strict-Strictly business. You take care of me and my people when we get hurt. I pay you for your efforts and we’re out of your hair until the next time.”

"...I don't know, Bucky."

"We'll be discreet. I promise. I'll make sure everyone knows not to blab about you and to only come if it's an absolute emergency."

"I'm sure you can find an actual doctor or something to help you. Why me?"

"Because I trust you."

"Bucky, my dad is the chief of police. You shouldn't trust me."

"I know you wouldn't tell your dad. Because despite how long it's been, I still know you care about me."

You cross your arms over your chest and look at him defensively, "And how do you know that?"

He gives you a cocky grin, "Because you wouldn't have helped me that first night."

"I was doing my civic duty. I'm in the healthcare field. It's my job to help people no matter where they come from."

"Okay. Fine. All I'm saying is that you do good work and I don't want anyone else fixing me and my guys up, but you. And, of course," he pauses to pull out his money clip, picking out a few hundred dollar bills. He holds it out to you, waiting.

You weigh out your options and then take the money. You agree, because, despite what your father tells you and how Bucky treated you in the past, a part of you still loves him and will always love him.

"Alright. I'll do it. Just let me know when you're coming just so I'm not surprised every time there's a knock at my door."

"Will do," he mumbles, grunting as he stands to his feet, "Get some rest. I'm sorry you had a shitty day."

"It-It's fine. I just-" you pause and start feeling choked up. You let out a sob and you lean forward, burying your face into Bucky's shirt.

His arms immediately wrap around you in a protective, comforting hug, "I got you, sweetheart. It's okay. Let it out." His heart breaks when he hears your muffled cries.

"We lost a patient today. He had cancer. He was only eleven," you mumbled into Bucky.

His arms around you tighten, "I'm sorry, sweetheart. That's heartbreaking. But I'm sure you did everything you could to make sure his last moments were good, right?"

You slowly nod and step away from him. You wipe at your eyes, "Shit, sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay, Y/N. Cry on me whenever you like," he gives you a soft smile, "You gonna be okay?"

"Yeah. I've just been keeping that in all day. Thanks, Bucky."

"No problem. You're a great nurse, Y/N. I just know that those kids are lucky to have you take care of them. I know I am." He kisses your forehead, "'Til next time." He murmurs before heading to the door.

"Hopefully, not any time soon."

He shoots you a grin, "No promises." With a wink, he's out the door. You go over and lock it in place. You lean against it and let out a long sigh. Your heart is beating fast again.

_________________________

It's one of those nights where you dad comes over after a shift and you two have dinner. Neither of you felt like cooking, so you ordered takeout instead. You eat out of the styrofoam containers at your small dining table, pausing in-between bites to chat.

"Work's been okay?" your dad asks before shoveling food into his mouth.

You swallow your food, washing it down with water, "Yeah. We lost a patient earlier this week and I-I can't seem to shake it."

Your dad nods in understanding, "I get it. It's never easy and it never gets easy. And you can't even do anything but continue working after it happens. You gotta push through it. In our line of work, it's important to care for others, but also important to care for yourself too. Got that, bug?"

"I know, dad. Thanks. What about you? You said earlier that work's been super stressful lately?"

Your dad gives an exhausted sigh and leans back in his chair, "Yeah. Been working closely with different units. For years there's been word that the Barnes Family has been the head of several crime operations happening around the city. They've been good about keeping their tracks covered, but since George Barnes' passing, I'm hoping to see his son slip up." Your dad gives a disappointed shake of his head, "Still can't believe you were friends and dated his son."

"He wasn't a bad kid, dad."

"Yeah, up until he started being a prick to you. Good thing you broke things off with him when you did."

You slowly nod, "Yeah. Good thing."

___________________________

You hadn't seen Bucky for two weeks, but he'd been texting you here and there during that time.

He sent you pictures of dogs he'd seen while out and about, would ask about your dad, even ordered food for you when you said you were too tired to eat. It was really sweet and kind of him, but you couldn't help but still have your reservations about Bucky.

Did your heart skip a beat every time you received a message from him? Absolutely. But were you still anticipating on the day he'd turn around on you again? Yup.

You kept things friendly, but also not too friendly. You didn't indulge in anything too personal or detailed. For all you knew, Bucky could be using you to get information about what your dad had on him. As much as you wanted to think Bucky wouldn't do that, you had to keep yourself accountable and aware.

[alicewritez]

Sweater Weather - Aaron Hotchner

word count: 815

summary: you and Aaron have harboured feelings for each other for a while, the pair of you holding yourselves back for so long, until now. with many mishaps of the day, you both end up in the same room together with one bed. the atmosphere is calm and light, allowing the perfect time to admit your feelings.

Aaron Hotchner x Fem! Reader

authors note: fluff - lots of it, just a short one this time as I haven’t written anything in months and I’m finally starting to get my spark back so expect a lot more from me soon! Feel free to send any requests/ideas you may have. I hope you enjoy 🌸💕

The case was a rough one. You and the team had wrapped it up earlier that day, but there were some complications with the jet and the bad weather near home in Quantico, meaning you were stuck in a remote town of Alaska and everyone was forced to share a room - everyone except you and Aaron. However, even that didn't go as smoothly as what you had hoped; due to a water leak in your room, you and Aaron were forced to share his room. With one double bed.

"I know this is inconvenient", Aaron speaks up, stifling a yawn; his eyes tired. "I can take the floor. It's no issue, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable".

"No it's okay", you speak up, finally finding your voice as you set your bag down by the dressing table. "Well.. only if you.. you know.. are happy sharing..", you ramble. "I wouldn't want you to do your back in or do any damage.."

"Of course, I don't mind sharing. We're colleagues. Just promise me you won't try and take all the covers."

"I'm known for stealing the covers". You give him a playful look. Aaron chuckles, and it takes you by surprise as it's so rare for him to let his guard down, especially around you and the team. "I wouldn't expect anything less." A playful smirk tugs at his lips. "Well, just try not to.. please? I don't want to freeze to death through the night."

"Well we can't have you getting all cold, can we?" You tease further. He gives you an amused look and rolls his eyes. "I'll live".

"Your outfit says otherwise". You quip back, a grin on your face. He appears taken aback by your comment, but a small grin is creeping across his face. How do you do this to him? He thinks. How do you make him all.. soft? He crossed his arms. "Well, I think it looks quite professional".

"Professional? I'd disagree.. distracting however? Fits much better.."

Despite the blush that threatens to appear, Aaron is smiling wider now. "And what about my outfit is so distracting?"

"The quarter zip? You couldn't have chosen anything less.. attractive? Why must you make things difficult?"

"You think my sweater is attractive?" He questions with a lifted brow, oblivious to what it was you were trying to imply.

"Well no.. I think you look attractive in it.." you groan. "Ugh.. did I just say that out loud?.. you're my boss-". He takes a step closer to you, his voice barely above a whisper. "We're not at work.. right now, I'm just Aaron."

"Except you're not just Aaron..", you start. "You're handsome, kind, caring, funny - when you finally let your guard down - you're perfect even with your imperfections.. you're.. you..". And without thinking about it for once, he closes the gap between you both and presses his lips against yours, the hand that had once been still at his side moves to cup your jaw.

He pulls back for a moment, resting his forehead against yours. "Please, just.. say something."

"This makes things difficult.. but I love you anyway." You smile.

"I love you too, so much..", he kisses you once more, smiling against your lips.

"I think we should share rooms more often, in cases away from home, if this is the outcome.."

"I think I'm going to have to agree with you on that one. Maybe my quarter zips aren't so bad after all?" He grins teasingly.

You laugh. "I'll love you no matter what you wear."

"That's good, because I really love this sweater." He grins before pulling you back in, this time kissing you more passionately. You kiss him back, your hand instinctively moving to brush against his cheek. He presses a kiss to your nose before reluctantly pulling away. "As much as I'd love to stay like this all night, we do have to get up early tomorrow morning."

You hum disappointedly, "I suppose.."

"As soon as we get home, you're mine, okay?" He whispers against your lips before stealing a quick kiss.

You grin against his lips, "okay..". He reluctantly moves back and heads over to the bed. Aaron gets in and lays down, making himself comfortable, before holding his arm out to her. "Come on, I'll keep you warm and I promise I won't steal the covers."

You grin, getting under the covers beside him and snuggling up into his side. He shuts off the lamp before wrapping an arm around you, pulling you close and securing you in place. "Goodnight, Princess. I love you."

"Goodnight Aaron, I love you too." You sigh contentedly as you shift, resting your head against his chest. He kisses the top of your head before closing his eyes, easily falling asleep with you by his side.

And that was the first of many peaceful nights to come.

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is: thisapplepielife! @thisapplepielife has 37 works posted to AO3 in the Stranger Things fandom and 24 of them are in the Steddie tag!

Our anonymous nominator recommends the following works by @thisapplepielife:

Tuesday's Gone With the Wind

Take the Money and Run

You Oughta Know

Never Not Mine

Let the Boy Be Merry

"They are my favorite Corroded Coffin writer. I found by accident their fic “Tuesday's Gone With the Wind” and loved everything they wrote since!" -- Anonymous

Below the cut, @thisapplepielife answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

Steve Harrington. I found myself not connecting with S4 when it premiered, and decided that I probably just needed to rewatch the other three seasons again first, since it'd been a while between seasons. Well, Steve was always my favorite, but I left that re-watch with his voice fully lodged in my brain. So, I had to write something for him, just for myself. That was You Oughta Know. We all knew Eddie identified as a runner, and that just felt like the story to tell. Then somehow, for some unknown reason that I still cannot possibly explain, I decided to actually post it. I still don't know what possessed me to do that, honestly.

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

I love a good second chance fic: A divorced couple that eventually rekindles. A missed first chance that they get to take another crack at, later in life. I also like a good heartbreaker of a fic. I know, I know. Don't get me wrong, I still love happy endings, but I don't require them. Break my heart. Do it.

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

Slice of life? Is that considered a trope? I know I like to write about things we all deal with in real life, from the small and inconsequential: a mattress with a bad spring. The delight of clean sheets. Or the bigger: the real life heartbreak of unavoidable loss and grief.  And older Steddie is my favorite, I think. I love to spend time writing for them. These boys that turned into men, who made a full life together, and it's great. Maybe not perfect. But they wouldn't trade it for the world. That makes me happiest.

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

The One in Which a Time Loop is Fucking Exhausting by badpancake is the one I think of that grabbed me first, and did not let go. I still need to read the final part of the trilogy! My fic TBR is so, so long because I definitely struggle with writing and reading at the same time. I know there is amazing work out there that I've just never read yet. But I look forward to it, absolutely. It's just something I've never figured out how to manage well. Joining Tumblr has helped that immensely, though! Reading the shorter fics here has been wonderful, and I've enjoyed it so much. There are amazing things being posted every single day! And I gotta say that don't start (too late) by Ark is one of the best "first time" fics I've ever read in any fandom. Eddie's inner voice is wonderful. I believe every word he thinks while he experiences this brand new thing with Steve.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

It's not brand new to me, but there's a found family one that I've been tinkering with for a very long time, and that excites me.  And I do love events for tossing me situations or prompts to write for that I may not have thought of, independently. @steddiemicrofic especially has been so, so fun. I think it was the very first event I wrote for on Tumblr, and the challenge of having a very limited amount of words, but still trying to make it feel like a whole story has been told, has been a blast. Thanks to @wynnyfryd and @steddieas-shegoes for challenging us all each month!

What is your writing process like?

I don't outline or anything. I just write, and edit, as I go. And I'll edit obsessively. I'll tweak and change small things over and over, ad nauseam. And even then, I know I still miss mistakes. But my mistakes are my own, I have no beta, because I kind of like being solely responsible for anything I write. Right or wrong. Here it is, take it or leave it. I also talk things through things in my own head a lot, especially dialogue, or I'll open a document, and just see where that takes me. And if I'm writing a long fic, like Tuesday's, I write totally out of order when scenes come to me. I wrote on every single year of that fic all at once. Then kept writing until they'd stitched themselves together into a full story. That's my last part of writing. Putting in the transitions from one scene to the next, when needed.  Sometimes ideas are more fully formed before I start putting words to the page, and other times I literally just start and figure it out as I go. There's one fic I wrote for Steddiemas last year where I sat Steve down at a mall food court and then just started writing. I had no idea what that was going to be. (It was Eddie turning up as the Mall Santa.)  Also: Research, research, research. I love the research aspect of writing. I'm curious in general, and if I can even think to look something up to see if it's true, or of the right time period, I will. And I like to add mixed media to my fics. That was a huge part of Take the Money & Tuesday's. All the newspaper articles and such. I felt like they were needed to make it feel like this really happened to these characters we all love so much. I did newspaper articles all throughout writing Tuesday's. In fact, I think that main article, the one at the top, was written and designed very early on in the writing process. They weren't all done at the end, they were done as the story needed them.

Do you have any writing quirks?

Short paragraphs. I love 'em. You'll pry them from my cold, dead fingers. Also see: Long sentences.  Honestly, I do like to throw out the rules, a bit. I write by feel. How does it sound, to my own ear? If it works, for my character, my fic or just me in general, I'll use it. "Don't use two "ands" in a sentence." Okay, but sometimes I'm gonna when that flows the best. Or: "That's a run-on." Okay, but I like the way it reads. "You don't need a comma there." But, I like the way that it breathes, so it's getting one. All this is especially true if writing from someone's POV. I know I don't always think in proper grammar, and I don't expect them to either. I don't want things to feel hard to read, but I do want them to feel natural. If that makes sense. I walk around, pacing as I write or edit on my phone, as if the moving somehow lets me see it differently. I think it does! And I don't know if this is a quirk, but some of the characterizations formed while writing Tuesday's have stuck, hard. Gareth is Gareth Jones, and where you find him, you'll probably find Di. Freak is Goodie. Jeff is Jeff Williams. These things have been decided in my brain, and now I feel compelled to take them with me, fic-to-fic. I didn't intend to build a headcanon I wouldn't be able to shake, but here we are.  I feel like I can transplant Steve and Eddie anywhere, into anything, and be comfortable changing things up. But the Corroded Coffin boys are cemented, as they were created, for the most part. Maybe that's because I did have to do so much shaping for them. Steve and Eddie, we know. We're all working off a decent amount of canon content. Corroded Coffin only had a few moments on screen to help flesh any of us flesh them out into real characters. And now that I've made my choices, for good or bad, they're here to stay.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

Finished, definitely. My three long fics were all mostly written before I started posting, and I still struggled to get the last part of All of Across the Universe out in a timely fashion. Tuesday's was posted over one week, one chapter per day, and I really enjoyed that fast schedule. It didn't give me any extra time to overthink the finished product. It was going out, and that was that. I had to trust that I knew what I was doing when I deemed it finished.

Which fic are you most proud of?

Tuesday's Gone With the Wind. I truly thought I was done after Take the Money and Run. And then this idea slapped me in the face, and I spent five months just lost in their world. These versions of the characters came so naturally, and they are still with me today. I feel like most of what I've written since then is shaped by those versions. Also, that was the last fic I wrote without anything else coming down the pipe. The last one before I joined Tumblr. The last one that had my full, and utter, undivided attention. It's really special to me, and I'm beyond grateful to everyone that has embraced it and recommended it to friends. I know it's got some scary warnings, but for those that have dove in and let me know that it spoke to you in some way, you've made me so happy. It spoke to me, too.

How did you get the idea for Tuesday's Gone With the Wind?

By watching the documentary "If I Leave Here Tomorrow" about the band Lynyrd Skynyrd. As I was watching it, there was an interview section where one of the band members spoke about their assistant road manager, saying: "He was like a bartender roadie. Where he took care of us really good, you know? Anybody who was sick, or needed a little more attention, he was just there for you. He was like the big brother, and sister, and your mama and everything." My brain whispered, Steve Harrington.  And that was that. Corroded Coffin were going to get Road Manager Steve Harrington, and he was gonna take care of them as they headed towards this unavoidable disaster. I wrote like 5k words the first night. It was just in there, waiting to spill out, somehow. And I think it's also an anomaly for me, but I'm fairly certain I started that fic with what turned out to be the opening. That first bit of Eddie's first interview section. I think that's where I started telling the story, and it held throughout. That's pretty rare for me. (Fun fact: I wrote all the interview bits in a separate document, and then just fit and tweaked them into the story, as needed. But not that opening. That was the launch pad into everything else.)

When writing Tuesday's Gone With the Wind, what was something you didn’t expect?

It's not exactly a Steddie answer, but - Gareth! Gareth Jones, my beloved. I wasn't on Tumblr when I wrote Tuesday's or any other social media in a fandom way. I was in my own bubble, doing my own thing. So, I didn't know the fandom had given him a fanon surname. I chose my own, and now he's just Gareth Jones to me, and always will be. He's also Eddie's best friend. I've pondered on more than one occasion on if Take the Money and Run would be different if I knew that first, lol. Just exploring my version of a character that had so little screen time to work off was incredibly fun. And has remained fun. Gareth is definitely gonna show up again in my future works. He's to Eddie, as Robin is to Steve in my head now and forevermore.

What inspired Take the Money and Run?

These lyrics from the song "Me and Paul" by Willie Nelson: Almost busted in Laredo But for reasons that I'd rather not disclose But if you're staying in a motel there and leave Just don't leave nothing in your clothes I had a literal shower thought that made me laugh. And thought, well, why are they even in a motel? Oh, they must be on a road trip. So, I wrote that little scene mainly in my head, but jotted it down, just in case, and assumed that was the end of it. But then I just kept writing it. Until I was knee deep in maps and mileage and research trying to figure this road trip out from a logistics standpoint. All because I thought it'd be funny if Eddie left weed in his pants and Steve got all put upon because of it.

What was your favorite part to write from You Oughta Know?

I loved getting to include all the fun 90s things, since that's when I was a teen, and can remember a lot of it very distinctly, first-hand. And I loved getting to use El's powers to look in on Eddie, so while they might not know where he is, they did know that he seemed to be doing okay out there in the world. Also, if I could go back and change one thing about it, I'd fix that I said Eddie's never had an acoustic guitar. I didn't notice his acoustic in his room until my re-watch. Oh well. This version of Eddie didn't, I guess, lol. (This might be from the second part, Eddie's POV. But still. It's my Roman Empire. I think of this mistake at least once a week and beat myself up. If I'd been on Tumblr at the time, I feel this would have never happened, because someone would have blogged about it, drawing my attention to it, surely.)

How do/did you feel writing Never Not Mine?

This one is heavily inspired by the Taylor Swift song imgonnagetyouback. It was fun to dig into a slightly angstier world for a bit. Because things don't always work out, or if they do, not always the first time around. I like to think they'll find each other again, in any universe, but they might not take the easiest path. They aren't perfect, and that's realistic.

What was the most difficult part of writing Let the Boy Be Merry?

Crying while writing it. This one slapped me around a little while writing. Life isn't always as romantic as fic leads us all to believe which, the audacity, honestly, lol, but the kind of love and relationship in this fic? That feels real to me. Old, and familiar, and even as well as you know a person, you can't read their mind. You don't always get what the other needs immediately, you don't get how important things can be to them, but figuring out how to compromise is love. Real, lasting love.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

This question was hard! I'm gonna pick two from Tuesday's: For the first, I cried while writing and then cried again while editing the scene where Eddie and Steve hash out how serious their relationship is, and realize they've kind of been on different pages. There are two scenes in Tuesday's that got to me, and made me cry while writing them, over and over, and I don't even know why. (The other is Gareth picking that fight with Steve. Yeah, yeah, I know. Neither of these parts are the saddest parts of Tuesday's. But they stripped me raw, for whatever reason.) And a second, more fun, favorite: I'm gonna go with the scene where Eddie's naked and tripping on mushrooms in the backyard while Steve hangs out with him, and Eddie thinks they've written "Tom Sawyer" by Rush. That was so fun, and just a feel good write, if that makes sense. That whole summer they spent at the lake I look back on writing fondly. They are so in love there. They are all happy. And this scene is carefree in a way that they won't always be, due to circumstances coming down the pipe.

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

I run @corrodedcoffinfest and I've got a whole list of planned pop-up events coming up over the next few months for that. Steddie is absolutely welcome, so if anyone would like a little more Corroded Coffin works in their life, consider coming to join us! I also finally updated my masterlist, so everything I've written for Stranger Things is finally gathered together. There's a lot that's still only on Tumblr and not on Ao3 at this point.

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

Thanks so much for including me and my works in this! And to the person who nominated me, thank you, thank you! You really made my day. It was fun to think about these fics again, and answer these questions. I've really enjoyed writing for Steddie, and I've also enjoyed making friends in the fandom. Thanks for welcoming me. Thanks for showing my fics love, and commenting or leaving kudos or reblogging. Just, thank you all so much. And I'm sorry if these answers were too long, lol. As a habitual "end notes" kind of writer, that's just the way I roll. 

Thank you to our author, @thisapplepielife, and our anonymous nominator! See more of thisapplepielife's works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[chongoblog]

Sure!

For context first, I want to say that this was part of a fun challenge I had Red give me. Basically I wanted to cook more, so I had Red give me a Single Ingredient that I had to use for a meal, and then that day I'd get stuff for it. The ingredient in question was cheddar cheese

Biscuits: Found this one online, admittedly. Mostly because I'd never made biscuits before (hell I'd never made my own dough!!), so I found a recipe for Red Lobster cheddar biscuits. Here's a link to it. I followed it pretty closely (including the topping), with some exceptions, like subbing in garlic salt for the garlic powder and salt. I personally feel like I left it in the over for a little long, but they still turned out great, and I'm especially proud with how my very first biscuits turned out! And I managed to use the cheddar cheese that I needed to use!

Green Beans: So one thing you'll learn as I post these recipes (which, who knows, maybe I'll post these more regularly) is that I LOVE sautee-ing things. And these green beans are no exception. I put some spoonfuls of butter in a pan along with some garlic, salt, some pepper, heated it up, and just sauteed these bad boys for a while. I did forget to cut off the tips, which I won't forget next time. The big trick is to make sure that they soak up the flavor of that garlic and butter while still keeping that crunch. I feel like I could've kept em on longer, since they were still SUPER crunchy, but that might just be my sensitive teeth talking.

Shrimp: After the green beans are done, I covered em up with a paper towel to try and keep em warm, and I use the same pan I used for the beans to cook the shrimp. After all, the garlic and butter I figured would do WONDERS for the shrimp. I did add a hearty dose of lemon juice to the pan for cooking the shrimp in as well. I got the shrimp raw and already peeled, because frankly, I was already doing a bunch of stuff I hadn't done before, so I didn't wanna have to add a whole other step.

Something else to note is that after it was all said and done, there was a fun little mix of butter, garlic and lemon juice that the shrimp was cooking in, and I poured that shit on the green beans and shrimp. And if that wasn't good enough, some of it pooled up on my plate, and dipping the biscuit in that was NEXT LEVEL.

Anyway, glad I did this fun little challenge. I'll probably do it again and make more stuff. Hope you all enjoy me slowly turning into a cooking blog, I guess lmao.

Red Lobster ain’t got shit on me tbh

[noblehouseofgay]

Necklaces

Black Brothers angst

Hurt/no comfort

Oops all angst tm

Jegulus too but it's sad

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Regulus had been too afraid to give Sirius a present in person. So he did what any anxious and easily forgotten person would do; he left it at his dorm with a note, not signed though of course.

It was a small silver gift box with a folded note slipped into the bow.

Sirius,

I originally picked these out for us, but I decided to give them both to you. Let you decide who gets the other half.

Happy birthday

Inside were two necklaces, one with a guitar and one with headphones. They were a pair. They went together. Regulus knew his brother wanted a guitar, and Regulus wore headphones ninety percent of the time. He thought it fit well.

He could've just signed the note, so Sirius would know who to give the necklace to. But Regulus is a devious little bitch who loves to be his own worst enemy.

Hours passed and Regulus decided he'd make good on his promise to James and go to the party tonight. He did his best to look Sirius-approved. He wore a shirt that's a little more revealing and he wore extra rings. However, he wore no necklace. Not yet.

Into the party he went. It was loud and overwhelming, Gryffindors were always loud and overwhelming. He would be fine. He'd find James and eventually have the guts to go find Sirius. Maybe they could salvage things, maybe that would be Sirius' present from the universe.

Walking around, he spotted a head full of messy dark brown hair. James. He smiled slightly at the comfort of seeing him.

That was, until James turned around. A shining silver necklace sat just below his collar. Regulus' chest tightened, tears piercing the back of his eyes.

He gave it to James.

He gave their matching necklaces to James.

Regulus' boyfriend. The boy who had replaced him as Sirius' brother.

How could Regulus be so naive? So hopeful?

Almost tripping, Regulus ran back through the portrait. He held his hand over his mouth, not sure if he was stopping himself from crying or puking.

Everything felt wrong.

How could Sirius not recognize his handwriting?

Or worse. He did recognize it, and chose James anyways.

He'd always choose James.

Regulus would choose Sirius over anyone else on the planet.

Sirius would always choose James.

Regulus slid down a wall, sobbing into his hands. He was to stupid. Always the stupid naive child. Always letting hope slither it's way back in, only for it to be ripped and gutted each time.

He heard footsteps coming. He tried to silence himself, fighting against unstable breaths and pouring tears.

James stood in front of him. He was saying something. His mouth was moving but Regulus heard nothing except ringing in his ears. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the necklace. It was shiny and new, shimmering in the candlelight like a beacon. It was mocking him. Taunting Taunting. Look at what you'll never have. What you'll never be.

"Regulus?" James was on his knees now, a hand lightly on his arm pulling him back to the present.

"That's supposed to be mine..." was all Regulus could get out.

"What? Love, you're not making sense..."

Then James noticed his gaze. He looked down at the necklace, and then back at Regulus.

James was smarter than people gave him credit for. His eyes slowly turned to fear and sympathy. "He said....the note...it wasn't signed...oh gods, Regulus- I- I had no idea. If I'd known- here, Reg, I'll talk to him, ok? I'll-" He started to take it off.

"No," Regulus shook his head. "No, Jamie. Keep it...he chose you."

[epickiya722]

Sometimes, I forget that there are people who find protagonists like Izuku, Tanjiro and Yuji "boring" because "they exhibit typical shonen protagonist traits" and one of them woukd be "They're nice, they're kind, they're all sunshine".

Which, okay, have your tastes, that's fine.

But when it comes to characters who are kind and/or nice, there's layers to them.

Just because a character is nice, doesn't mean they're kind and vice versa.

A character can be the most evil one in that story and still show kindness to some people somehow. A nice character may be the one to do immoral things, Yuji being an example.

The reasons for why a character is nice and/or kind varies, too.

Some are just genuinely born that one. Some may be selective as to who they show those sides, too, because of their own morality. Maybe, a character is being kind or nice to also manipulate others. Some characters may choose to be kind because who will, despite the cruelty of the world?

Also, I feel like, even with people outside of a fandom, they hear or seen a character being nice and kind, they just stop at that and don't think they're capable of being ruthless.

Like, Tanjiro canonically has a pure soul, but multiple times he has shown he is not only a menace in a fight, but he has shown to be one in casual situations. Sometimes, he's not even aware he is because he is so nice.

Izuku, he's a sweetheart, too. But even he will just shut off that "sunshine" to literally tear into you. He has been told in canon to hold back his emotions, the most prominent one being his anger. When he's angry, go apologize!

Yuji, look, let's be real... he is sunshine and rainbows, but that boy is probably the least sweetest one out of these three examples. Hold back? Yuji don't know what that is. No, no, he really don't. I kid you not, this kid doesn't. You can't even use the fight against Junpei as one because he punched Junpei UP into a window. Had Junpei not have that shikigami, he would have gotten major injuries.

My point is!

Just because a character is kind or nice or both, it doesn't mean...

A) it's the only trait they have.

B) they're not capable of not being kind or nice.

I think some see nice and kind and associate it with being "soft" in a derogatory manner.

Which, first off, there's nothing wrong with being soft.

I'll be honest, it will sound silly (go ahead and laugh actually, I encourage it), but if you asked put a character like one of the mentioned protagonists in front of me along with their villain and asked me "who I'm more scared of" I'm pointing at the protagonist.

Listen to me. Don't let that cuteness fool you.

With a villain, I am well aware of that villain being evil and will hurt me no matter what I do.

With someone like Yuji or Tanjiro or Izuku, they look nice, they look kind but it's like you have to be careful to not to trigger them in a way to set them off. You're caught off guard but those sweet faces and then next thing you know, BOOM! You got knocked out.

If anything, as much as people like to clown on these characters, they're only just following the footsteps of the ones before them.

Just like those legends, they started from the bottom and grew stronger over time and even with being a chill person or don't want to do evil, that doesn't exempt them from being not "a sweetheart".

I said it before, but a sunshine character to me is a character who is warm but lethal, like sunlight.

[bluu3berry]

Flowering Heart.

{CW: Disease, Heartbreak, Graphic depiction, Hanahaki Disease.} Enjoy ~!

Please read, or atleast reblog I spent so much time on this...

Sans stared into the mirror… a new day in the underground. Today was special! No humans have fallen recently and I got closer to the lady behind the door. In Fact, he learned her name! Toriel. He was never one for lovey-dovey stuff but over the years of talking with her, he got to know her. She used to care for children, she loves cooking, she is a very clean person and other hobbies of hers! It grew to the point that surprisingly he found himself catching feelings for her… to the point he was able to get echo flowers from Waterfall just for this occasion!

He adjusted his red bowtie which was tied to his normal clothing, as he smiled a bit wider than his normal grin. He sighs as he stands up and “shortcut” from his room to the door of the ruin.. doing the secret knock which indicates who it is.. he hears Toriel coming quickly. 

“ Sans! Sans! Hah, I found a joke book and I have so many things to tell. However.. you came earlier than usual! Anything different?” The lady spoke softly with sweetness.. he thought of words to tell the monster behind the door for this occasion. “ Why yes Tori is uhh got some good news for ya- or well me. I think I got something for ya “Sans spoke back awkwardly as he grinned at the door awaiting the response.

“ Oh- wait what is it? A joke? Another one of your hotdogs, I do need to still try to make those don’t you agree? “ Toriel said giggling afterward as she finally sat down at the door… sans paused as he thought for a moment “Ehh nah… it's something more alive huh? I thought you would like your Into flowers right?” He said slightly nervous for her reaction.. he sat on the snow before grabbing the echo flowers and pushing them through the door.. a few petals being slightly shaved off due to the tight gap “Oh? Echo flowers.. sans I haven't seen these in such a long time! It's a wondrous gift! But why flowers, I never asked for these?” She spoke slightly confused as sans sighed and waited for the echo flower to speak for itself. “ You should. maybe listen to the plant, huh?” Sans said softly as Toriel nodded

Toriel picked up the flower and held it close to her floppy ears as the echo flower glowed whispering into her ear “ Could we go to Grillby’s… “ the echo ringed as another picked up the sentence. “ You are a good friend to me.. but.. “ it rang as Toriel knew what was to come.. she froze hearing the third one. “ Could… it be more. “ Toriel was shocked! The echo flowers glow went silent, as Sans on the other side of the door fidgeted quietly.

“ Sans... “ Toriel spoke in a slightly deep and upsetting tone.. sans paused listening to what Toriel had to say “ I am.. not ready for more than this. I haven't even seen your face. I'm sorry but I don't think I'm ready for a relationship. Besides, I don't think I could even live out of the ruins. Everything would be so new! I don't know how much it would have changed.“ She spoke softly to let him down easily.. Which didn't work. She slid the flowers back out a couple of the petals ripping off as the flower's glow slowly disappeared into nothing “.. heh- that's alright Tori ignored it, what was that book about anyways? “ Sans said awkwardly and distant but not to the point of tears.. But they started to roll. Why? He heard no response to his question.

It was just the soft padding of feet leaving the door. Toriel needed space after such a thing, knowing the monster beyond the door? Interested in her.. that changed how she viewed sans. But she was too kind to tell him that. He tapped the door on his knock again, listening for the feet to return. “ Eh? Toriel didn't know you were going somewhere. I'll wait for ya. “ He said softly as he pulled his bowtie off and wrapped it around his stitched jacket.. zipping up the coat and laying in the snow waiting for her to return.. after hours, and hours of waiting, no response. But he didn't leave, besides! He still had hope for Toriel to return. It was getting colder and colder on his bones.

What surprised him the most was the flowers blooming in his eye.. the echo flowers covered the left side of his face quickly. “ Hn.. eh? Ah, flowers? Wonder if I got seeds in my skull again hah.. "Sans spoke as his voice was weary.. his hand reached to his face grabbing a flower and pulling in it slightly.. usually they come out right? Nope.. he jolted out of the snow still tired but in a panic, shock of pain was sent throughout his head. "A-AGHH-!?" He *screamed as the pain bloomed from his eyesight. He clawed at the echo flower trying to rip the source of pain to subside. He was able to tear out a few strangling blue petals, which fell onto his fluffy coat rim and sleeves. He thrashed around trying to yank out more of the flowers, tossing and turning in the snow, causing more snow to pile on top of him. The cold slowly replaced the pain, numbing the harm caused as he curled into a ball. Watching as a snowstorm started to form in Snowdin.

“ I feel so.. wea-.. hah.. ah. “ His panicked voice was overtaken by an exhausted gaze and becoming too weak to move. His pupils disappeared from the only eye available as the echo petals slowly formed in between his hand.. and in the gaps of his neck, not being fully flowers yet but the petals sure didn't help with the cold.“ It's.. so.. chilly.. “ he spoke as the flowers and petals seemed to be feeding off his magical energy and his form… his eyes turned glassy his vision blurring all he could make out was the familiar red scarf of his brother quickly approaching as he slipped into unconsciousness. @anon-coke @scramble-eg @thelunarsystemwrites @superbfirnacho @the-second-reason < Thanks for pure review