#maybe i’ll delete idk

[pixiestein]

bigstupid ramble/rant incoming feel free to ignore//cursing cw

it’s actually very disturbing to me how many people in the monster high fandom think it’s ok to say that abbey & twylas g1 sculpts are “ugly” or “offputting” because they have strong/square jaws & the new molds are sooo much better bc they no longer have them. like i really really really try to be nice here & pardon my language but are you fucking stupid? did you miss literally everything monster high was trying to teach you? did you miss the whole “everyone is unique & beautiful in their own way” thing? or did you just forget that the features you’re calling ugly are features that real people have? genuinely asking because it’s baffling to me how many people who praise g3 for it’s body diversity are foaming at the mouth excited over characters’ unique features being replaced with conventionally attractive ones. u don’t like strong jawlines? awesome, people who have them still deserve to feel beautiful & have gorgeous dolls that look like them & the fact that mh had that & got rid of it is objectively bad. like first of all, a franchise that preaches accepting ppls differences SHOULD have characters with both body types & facial features that aren’t considered “conventionally attractive”. that was one of the issues w g1, their message was about everyone being different but everyone had the exact some skinny body type. & now g3 has greatly improved on body diversity (pls give us an actual plus sized doll tho) yet they’ve been removing diversity in facial features. it fucks me up bc WHY can’t we have rep for diverse body types AND rep for diverse facial features?? and second, bro they are literally monsters. they absolutely should have features that challenge traditional beauty standards because hello she’s a yeti, she needs jaw space to house those bigass tusks. and if those unconventional features look strange to you? GOOD. bask in their strange weird abnormal beauty!! i literally don’t care if u think abbeys new face is cuter & her old jaw was ugly, if you see a person with a prominent jawline & think “hm not aesthetically pleasing enough” unpack that with your therapist, don’t post it on the internet where impressionable kids with those exact features get to see it & gather more fuel for their insecurities. this goes for literally any facial feature or body part btw. basically, bottom line, if it’s a feature that real people have that they can’t control, don’t fucking say a WORD about how aesthetically unpleasant you find it. criticize the fashion, criticize the quality control & messed up face screenings, criticize the weird continuity errors & questionable representation, but if your issue with a doll is their body type/facial features look ugly to u, shut the fuck up!!!!!!

[pinkerthings]

just saw moot say that what if mike and will are trapped in a closet together in s5 and one of them has to cover the other one’s mouth bc they’re scared and making noises, & now i CANT STOP PICTURING this scene like omg I can SOOOO picture mike freaking out bc he arguably has less experience with the upside down creatures/demogorgons and such so he would probably be more scared than will, so will would have to be the one to whisper like “shut up!” and cover Mike’s mouth with his hand, and then they’d both wait for the monster to pass before breathing a sigh of relief. and then the TENSIONNNNNN afterwards would be so crazy and Mike would be like, “um, sorry” and will would be like “it’s okay” and then imagine mike starts bringing up the painting or something and then someone opens the door and is like 🤨 what r u two doing in here, and then they both blush & fanfics will come true and lives will be changed

[jujuscrolled]

love, actually

☆ in which if you look closely, you’ll find that love actually is all around (ft. toji, choso, yuta)

Toji

Toji had become increasingly worried about his son. Megumi had never been quite the talker - always resorting to a shrug, a nod or a side eye. Toji had become accustomed to their conversation (or lack there of) - so much so that he could read Megumi like a book. Their routine went like such: Megumi would come home, they’d have minimal conversation over how his school day had gone, he’d leave to do his homework and come out by dinner time (he’d complain about the taste or smell or anything else that didn’t meet his expectations), then they’d watch reruns of Crayon Shin-Chan and demolish exactly half of a large bucket of red vines. That was what Toji liked, it was a nice routine, he thought.

Until about a week ago - Megumi had eaten his dinner (without complaints!) and while they still had their nightly father-son bonding over Shin-chan Megumi had only eaten about a third of what he usually ate of red vines, and God forbid he tried asking about school.

Toji was at a bit of a loss considering he wasn’t much of a talk about your feelings kinda guy but that didn’t mean he wasn’t worried about his son. So, the obvious solution? Talk to the most emotionally available person he knew: you.

You were their neighbor and Toji’s close friend - though, really more of his only friend. You were the only one that would genuinely tolerate and even enjoy both his and his son’s emotional constipation.

“So, you’re worried about him… Because he’s not complaining about your food?” You asked as you sat at one of the barstools that faced his kitchen.

“There’s more to it. ‘Sides, i’m not worried i’m just…” Toji paused, thinking of a word to properly describe what he was feeling but his mind was far too jam packed with thoughts to formulate a proper word.

“It’s called being worried, Toj. And honestly? Considering you’re trying to make dinner with a chicken breast and a single carrot - i’m worried now too.” You mused, standing up and making your way over to him. (He had asked you to help him make dinner earlier but you had refused knowing that you’d end up doing most of the work.)

Toji watched you as you leaned onto the counter, back against the drawers as you looked at him curiously. He felt his hands get sweaty.

“Well, have you asked his teachers if he’s been off in class too?” You asked causing Toji to roll his eyes, “‘m not asking his teacher about my son.”

It was your turn to roll your eyes at him, “don’t be silly. They spend a lot of time with him - it’s not a bad thing to ask about your son as a concerned parent! Besides, you’re asking me about him and I’m just your neighbor.”

Toji scoffed at you, lifting his hand to flick your forehead.

“Don’t be stupid, you’re more than just our neighbor. ‘Sides, the brat likes you.” He looked away from you feeling uncharacteristically bashful as you grinned up at him.

“Awww, you guys like me?” You cooed, poking at his side making him swat your hand away. Toji was surprisingly ticklish for being such a burly man so you always found it funny to poke at the not so metaphorical bear.

“Well alright then, I’ll do what I can. Now please move, I doubt boiled chicken and half a carrot can hardly provide anyone with the necessary nutrients to survive.” You muttered pushing on his beefy shoulder so he could move.

“I put seasonings and shit in here too, don’t piss me off.” He muttered, but moved away from the stove regardless.

Four bowls of chicken noodle soup (Toji had seconds), a few episodes of Shin-Chan and three-fourths of a jar of red vines later Toji found himself in his room, mouth ajar as he stared at his phone.

From: Toji (don’t answer)

no fuckin’ way. he’s 6. u pullin my leg?

To: Y/n

you’ll never find me anywhere near ur nasty ass leg, old man. ur welcome btw !! xoxo

Toji deadpanned at your message before rubbing a hand over his face. He wasn’t even that much older than you. Shaking his head and focusing on the main topic; he supposed a crush wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.

The next day the three of you found yourselves walking down the street, per your suggestion of course. You’d thought the Christmas decorations would help get Megumi to talk about his crush. Some kid in his class that he refused to tell even you more about. Toji couldn’t lie, his interest was piqued. It wasn’t often that the Fushiguros were interested in people so clearly this kid has got to be something special.

“So, school got any fun things going on?” Toji asked awkwardly. Out of his peripheral he saw the way you had face palmed.

“Not really, no.” Megumi said, eyes not rising from where they’d been the entire walk; the floor.

“Right.” He muttered feeling dejected. As if sensing his father’s dissatisfaction, Megumi cleared his throat before shoving his hands in his pockets, “actually, there’s a play coming up. For Christmas and stuff.”

You and Toji looked at each other, eyes wide. “Oh! Are we invited?” You asked, only getting a shrug from Megumi.

“Well I’m in it so I have a few tickets if you want them.” He said nonchalantly, as if he hadn’t just dropped the most unexpected bomb on his father. “You’re in the play?” Toji asked, trying to keep his voice as neutral as possible so not to scare off Megumi’s invitation.

“Yeah. A friend of mine convinced me.” Toji glanced over at you, watching as your eyes sparkled.

“Cool, well we can help you practice, if you’d like.” You said, looking over at Toji who cleared his throat, “yeah, and I can help build stuff or whatever.” Toji kept his gaze in front of him, not wanting to scare the young boy off.

He pulled out his phone having felt it buzz and arched a brow at the message.

From: Y/n

wasn’t I the one that helped you build everything in ur house ? :p

Toji reached over, behind Megumi, to shove your shoulder surprisingly gently before texting you back.

From: Toji (don’t answer)

help me get the kid w his crush i’ll take u to dinner. on me

Toji stuffed his phone in his pocket, refusing to turn to look at you since that same damned warmth in his cheeks that you always seemed to cause was back and warmer than ever.

choso

Your fingers clicked against the keys on your keyboard, filing out yet another dreaded email. With the holidays coming up it seemed like less and less people were using their brains.

One of those people being your boss: Satoru Gojo. Who was currently standing beside you, the rolled up sheets of paper that he’d probably had some poor intern print out just to give them something to do, tapping against your head in attempts to get your attention - though really, he just found a wicked sense of pleasure in annoying you.

“Yes, Gojo?” You sighed, clicking send before turning to look at him.

“Come to my office please, I’d like to discuss a very important topic.” He said. Now, if Gojo was normal you’d be very concerned at his words. Thankfully (or not, depends who you ask, really) Gojo was far from normal and if the cheshire grin and the pure evil lurking behind his cerulean eyes were anything to go by; he was just playing on something else that would surely cause you a headache.

Sure enough, the second you were in his office he was grinning even wider at you.

“So. How’s my beloved friend doing today?” He asked, leaning forward onto his elbows, his head supported by his folded hands.

“What do you want from me, Satoru.” You sighed, patience unusually thin due to the long string of his emails that he’d tasked you with replying to claiming that you did all the “proper talk” better than he did.

“Okay fine, i’ll cut to the chase but only because I have last minute party planning to do; when are you gonna do something about your little problem?”

You only stared at him, unable to find it within you to somehow guess what the hell he was talking about this time.

“Pardon?”

“Sheesh, and you say i’m the childish one. Look, because you’re my friend and I love you; we have a bet going on and while I can afford lose a grand; I’m not about to let my best friend be alone on Christmas so if confess by tonight i’ll personally give you the thousand that I have riding on this.”

Satoru was insane, you knew this, but this was just far beyond insanity.

“Don’t look at me like that! I’ll even be your wingman!” You could only gape at his words, the rest of his speech finally processing in your mind and only humiliating you further.

“You said the entire office has a bet on this?!” You whispered shouted, feeling your cheeks heat up as you thought about all the times you’d caught people staring at you whenever you and Choso spoke. It all made sense now, though really, you had hoped you’d just been paranoid. The reality of it all was much more horrifying than your mind.

“Well… Yes… We weren’t aware that you were trying to keep it lowkey, sweets…” You groaned at his words, moving to slam your head onto his desk but his hand reached over blocking you from doing so.

“Does… Does he know?” You asked, unable to look at him in the eyes.

“I think you know the answer to that…”

“I’m putting my two weeks in.”

“Nonsense! Sweets, you have this in the bag alright? And especially if you have me as your wingman! So here’s the plan-“

And so you found yourself standing awkwardly in the corner of the stupid Christmas party Satoru had thrown to “boost morale”. You had to give him credit though, despite your sour mood - the rest of the office seemed to actually be having fun. The dance floor was filled with your coworkers dancing and talking together - Satoru in the middle of it all of course, eyes bright and santa hat tilted atop his head. The man didn’t even have to drink to have that much fun, you couldn’t help but smile at the realization.

“He seems to be enjoying his own party.” Your eyes widened at the all too familiar voice next to you, swallowing your drink harshly as you turned to look at him.

Kamo Choso. Looking devastatingly handsome in a white button up, sleeves rolled up and exposing his forearms. The black slacks he wore always were a joy to witness. And as if you needed any other reason to gawk at the gorgeous man in front of you, he had decided to wear his hair down. Oh, what a treat.

“Huh? Oh! Er.. Uhm, yeah, he’s quite the party enjoyer.” You inwardly cringed at yourself, party enjoyer?! Really?

Choso only laughed, looking back over at your friend who was now doing the sprinkler - Suguru and Shoko throwing confetti at him as if it was money.

“I take it you’re not?” He asked, looking back at you before taking a sip of his own drink. You could only shrug, “I guess I prefer a quiet night in…”

“Me too.” He said, nodding to himself.

“Y/n!” You felt your entire body tense at Satoru’s call, eyes closing in fear of what was to come.

Sure enough, an arm was thrown around your shoulder. “Oh, hello, Cho!”

“It’s Choso.”

“We’re all pals here are we not? Anyway! This is perfect, i’ve been trying to get Y/n on the dance floor all night but since we’re all paired up already, do you mind a few rounds with my good friend here?”

You felt like pinching yourself, wanting so desperately to wake up from this very obvious nightmare you were having.

Unfortunately, the pinch only added to your pain and suffering.

“Uhm…”

“You really don’t have to do that, Choso. Our boss here was unfortunately dropped far too often as a child and it clearly must have caused irreversible damage.” You said, glaring at Satoru who only let out a loud laugh before patting your back far too harshly causing you to stumble forward.

“Have fun! Not too much fun though.” He winked, walking away leaving you to clean up the mess he’d caused.

“I’m… So sorry…” You cringed out. Not having the heart to face the man next to you.

Much to your surprise, he only let out a chuckle.

“Don’t be - I’ve actually been meaning to ask you to dance but couldn’t figure out how to so I guess now I’ll just have to thank him later.. If you’ll have me of course…”

Yuta

“Yuji what the hell are these?” You asked as you stared down at the ridiculously bad pictures Yuji had taken on your phone. You had put your entire trust in him seeing as he had been bending down and allegedly breaking his back to take “the perfect photos” but as you stared at the blurry atrocities on your phone - it was clear that while he meant well, Yuji was far to hyperactive to take steady photos.

“Huh? whats wrong with them?” He asked, leaning over your shoulder to look at them with you.

“What do you mean what’s wrong with them?! Are these even of me? This is a blurry picture of a dog!” You whined, hearting the picture so it’d be put into your favorites folder - it was actually a pretty cute dog, blurry or not.

“Aw man! I must’ve accidentally had the one second delay on them, i’m sorry.” He said, grabbing your phone so he could get a closer look at the photos.

“It’s okay. I don’t even really need them anyway.” You sighed, patting his head. He only pouted, handing you your phone.

“Maybe you show up in Maki’s pictures? Or inumaki’s! He took some too!” Yuji said.

“What about my pictures?” Maki asked before you could say anything. You and Yuji looked over as she walked closer to you and Yuji, Inumaki and Megumi following behind her.

“I took crappy photos of Y/n so I was just talking about your photos and how you might have better pictures of everyone!” Yuji explained, sitting next to you.

“Why’d you take crappy photos?” Maki asked, frowning at Yuji who only let out an offended scoff.

“I didn’t do it on purpose!” He replied only causing them both to argue if it had been intentional or not.

“Guys! It’s fine, really, but if I happen to show up in the background of any of your guys’ pictures then send them my way please.” You begged, clicking off your phone before leaning back on the bench you were all squeezed onto.

The campus was abnormally empty, though with the temperature dropping you couldn’t say you were surprised. Sitting outside during the winter was not something any of the other students wanted to do so you guys chose to sit there to avoid the indoor crowds. Nobara, Yuta and Panda refused to go out in the cold if it could be helped so you all usually met in the library once Nobara sent you a text telling you that the crowds had dispersed.

“Oh! Wait, I’m pretty sure I remember Yuta taking photos of everyone.” Maki said causing you to look away from Megumi and Yuji who were debating if your professors Geto and Gojo were dating or not. They just seemed to have too much unspoken energy in the air around them.

“Yeah maybe of you guys.” You sighed. Maki rolled her eyes at you, “i’m serious. He’s the likely candidate for having pictures of you. Good ones too - you’ve seen his portfolio.”

You could only shrug at her words, unlocking your phone again to see if maybe you’d missed any hidden gems.

There was nothing.

“Just ask him, Y/n! Why are you so scared?” Maki sighed, grabbing your phone and forcing you to look at her.

Your only hope was Yuta Okkotsu - the guy who honestly would’ve been your first choice (aside from Megumi who was too busy with finals to join your group) but unfortunately for you, he hated your guts.

“Oh my Gods he does not hate you.” She groaned, as she scrolled through the pictures. You watched as she grimaced at them only furthering your feeling of despair.

“No, it’s fine. I don’t even need the pictures or anything.”

“Need them or not - Yuta will have some. So speak now or forever hold your peace.” Maki said handing you your phone back.

“Well, lucky for me I enjoy my peace quite a bit.”

The week had passed with you refusing to ask Yuta for pictures. Maybe he didn’t actually hate you but you highly doubted he liked you.

Every time you’d try to speak to him, he’d find an excuse to leave the conversation as soon as possible. If it was ever just the two of you waiting for the rest of the group, he’d miraculously always receive a silent phone call that he just had to answer. If you ever asked to hang out (though this had been closer to the beginning of your friendship with the group) he’d find an excuse for that too.

Overall, the guy avoided you like the plague and had never tried to get close to you despite the rest of the group being welcoming. You couldn’t help but let it bother you a little bit since you really didn’t think you’d done anything to start off on the wrong foot with him but at the end of the day - you also didn’t want to force a friendship with him if he wasn’t open to it.

You groaned into your pillow before pulling your phone out, your finger hovering over Yuta’s contact number.

You supposed it couldn’t hurt to just ask… Though as your luck would have it, your finger must’ve been hovering a little too close to the call button and now before you could even process it, the phone had started to dial his number making your eyes widen.

“Hello?” His voice sounded leaving you with your mouth wide open and your heart about to beat out of your chest.

“Uhm… Hello?” He asked again, making you sit up as you put the phone to your ear. “Oh! Uhm, hi, yes sorry! It’s Y/n…” You said, face palming.

“Yeah… I know…”

“R-right… Sorry, uhm, I was just calling because Maki had mentioned something about you taking photos the other day? Or, last week would be more accurate…” You let out an awkward chuckle as you were met with silence.

“Uhm, hello?” You asked after a moment. Had he hung up on you? You checked the screen only to see the call was still ongoing.

“Oh. Uhm. Yeah, I did but i’m not sure if they’re any good.” He muttered into the phone. Despite his tone, you couldn’t help the excitement that bubbled in your chest.

“Wait, really?! Wow! Is it okay if I stop by to see if-“

“Uhm, I don’t think… I mean, they’re not great. Probably too blurry - they won’t be any good.” He explained but you were far too excited.

“Trust me, anything will be better than Yuji’s blurry pictures.” You said, jumping off your bed and slipping on your shoes.

“I can be over in about ten minutes! Thank you so much!” You said, pulling your phone away from you so you could hang up.

You could’ve been at his dorm sooner but you figured you’d get him a coffee or something as both a peace offering and a thank you.

So with a coffee and a slice of pistachio cake you stood outside Yuta and Inumaki’s shared dorm room.

You heard shuffling on the other side of the door before it opened slowly. Yuta stood awkwardly, hands at his sides as he stared at you. You pushed through your discomfort and offered a smile before raising the treats towards him, “a small thank you - for your time and maybe for your photography skills as well.”

He only rubbed the back of his neck, glancing behind him before he cleared his throat, “uhm, look, I really don’t think you show up in any of the pictures or videos… So… Sorry to have wasted your time and stuff.” He muttered, not meeting your eyes.

You felt your eyes sting, hands lowering since he still hadn’t taken the cake or coffee from you. You were feeling rejected and embarrassed.

“Oh… Well, since i’m already here… Do you mind if I still look through? I’m sure they’re lovely regardless…” You asked, trying to keep face as you smiled up at him through teary eyes.

“I-… Uhm…” He sighed before moving sideways allowing you into his room.

You’d been in the dorm before, though it was the first time he had also been in there with you considering every time Inumaki invited you over Yuta was always suspiciously gone.

He was slow to pull out his laptop, clicking through files before he placed it down in front of you.

“These are the only ones that were salvageable.” He muttered, allowing you to click through.

Sure enough, they were gorgeous. Yuta was the only one in your group with a professional grade camera and a certain eye for photography as well so it really was a no-brainer that they’d be perfect. You couldn’t help but smile at the photos of your friends. Small ache in your chest as you realized that he had taken special care in not including you in any of them. He’d even gotten some of Yuji, who had been glued to your side the entire day, and managed to not even have a finger of yours in frame. Truly talented he was.

As you clicked through, you couldn’t help but let your eyes wander to the recently opened file, your eyes landing on a file with your name on it, excitement filling your chest.

Figuring they’d probably just be the non-cropped versions of what you had already seen, you clicked on the file without really giving it a second thought.

Instead of that though, you were met with an entire portfolio of just you. Pictures of you smiling, closeups of your hands and eyes, videos of you just existing loading onto the screen.

“Oh…” Was the only thing you were able to whisper. “They’re… They’re beautiful, Yuta... But I- I thought you hated me?”

He stayed quiet, not meeting your eyes that had once again filled with tears. Happy ones this time.

“Yeah, well… Hopefully those work for you… I’ll uhm… I have to go but send yourself whichever ones you want.” He said, grabbing his backpack before darting out the door, leaving you with far too much to process.

a/n; tysm for reading <3 comments n reblogs always welcome ! oh and yes ! this is very much based on the movie love actually ! :3

[cactusisconfused]

I’m having ✨thoughts✨

Aroace(?) Soap

-

Soap doesn’t understand why he feels this way for Ghost- he’s never felt this way before. Not for anyone. No woman, no man- no one.

Yet when Soap is around Simon, his mind swarms with thoughts he’s never had before. Thoughts of wanting to hold the man close. To listen to his deep, gravely, stupidly handsome British accent.

He’s so scared that it’s love- romantic love.

Soap isn’t emotionless, he loves with his whole mind and heart to the point it’s fucked him over in more ways than one- but never has he felt this.

He’s dated of course, because that’s what you’re supposed to be doing growing up. He’d dated a few girls. They were pretty, but that idea only rendered as a fact, with no emotion behind it. Like how a sunset can be beautiful but you wouldn’t take a sunset out on a date.

His relationship started when he was fourteen. A girl confessed her love, and Soap thought that’s all it took to be in love, for someone to say a ‘magic’ word. He didn’t understand that he was supposed to feel something.

She would try to kiss him, hug him, and he would give it back but it was never honest. Kissing felt wrong, felt nothing like how it seemed in the movies. They only lasted a few weeks.

He dated another girl a year later, his older sister Leah, had put them on a blind date. The girl was sweet, and again objectively pretty, but he felt…nothing.

He’s heard people talk about love, about the butterflies in one’s stomach, how everything would seem to zero in on one person. But as he looked at her from across the table, he felt nothing. He tried again, thinking that he just needed to wait for something to click.

She tried to advance things, Soap couldn’t get past taking his shirt off before making a piss poor excuse to leave. He doesn’t know why he felt like he needed to leave- why his skin was crawling at the thought of being intimate. But he did, and when he got an earful the next day from her, he had no good argument.

The girl had looked at Soap for a long moment before gently asking if Soap was gay. If that’s why his kisses never felt true, why there was no love- romantic love.

Soap at the time agreed with her, one for an out and two as it felt like a solid explanation for the way he was acting. He’d never felt anything towards guys, but maybe that’s because he’s never tried, he had never thought about it.

Soap had just turned seventeen when a guy friend of his admitted his attraction to Soap. Again, Soap looked at the man, dark brown hair, decent build, a kind man. Soap agreed regardless, already hating himself for going through with it. But maybe- maybe he is into guys and just…needs to get to know him more.

The two go on many dates and they last for almost a year. Soap could almost convince himself that he was truly in love.

Looking back, he wonders if he only felt that way because this man was the only one who saw Soap for who he was, and not the face he puts on for everyone else.

But Soap knows he was pushing his luck, knows he was leading the man on. The guilt had eaten him whole.

Three good people, all gave their undying love to Soap, and he gave nothing in return.

He doesn’t know why he doesn’t feel how they felt- doesn’t know whats wrong with him. Why he can’t feel romance, why he’s never wanted sex.

He joins the military the next year, and he forgets about those feelings. Relationships aren’t meant to happen between soldiers and the one night stands are easy enough to dodge- both from men and women.

He had completely forgotten about all of it.

He had.

He really had.

Until Simon fucking Riley.

Until he saw that beast of a man dressed as the fucking grim reaper.

It wasn’t in an instant that he felt these new emotions. It was well after Las Almas and well after they catch Makarov.

Throughout that time, Soap and Simon got close, closer than either had truly expected. They flirted, though it was all banter of course.

Until it wasn’t.

Until Soap realized as he watched Ghost move through a warehouse through a sniper optic, that he found he meant it.

Then he started thinking and thinking. He couldn’t stop.

He couldn’t stop himself from getting jealous when anyone else looked at Simon with a suggestive glance. How he couldn’t stop thinking about holding him close, closer than Soap had let anyone before. How he had thought about pulling Simon close and have his lips meet the other’s.

It scares him.

Even if this is love- romantic love- he doesn’t feel like it’s enough. That he wouldn’t be a good enough partner, like how he was with the others in the past. What if these thoughts are the same as the last guy’s, he’s just going through some mental hoops to make him think it’s romantic?

Not to mention, Simon is his fucking superior- and his closest friend.

If he admitted his ‘love’ and for some reason Simon agreed, what if it goes away? What if he can’t recuperate once more? He’ll ruin their friendship and Soap can’t bare the thought of seeing Ghost take place of Simon.

He’s in turmoil and has no idea what to do with it.

He can’t tell gaz, he wouldn’t understand why Soap feels like he’s going crazy for feeling romantic for the first time. And like hell can he tell price, for the same reasons, plus insubordination. Price is a chill man, Soap knows that, but why stir a pot that’s already way past boiling.

So he’s stuck, with nothing but his journal and swarming feelings that make no sense.

-

Lmao, imagine identifying as aro ace for years and then boom, nada. Hahhahahahha. Definitely not projecting on him.

Definitely.

Anyway.

Have a good day (●’◡’●)ﾉ

[bullseyelover]

i want to talk about this scene briefly, it’s such a short scene only being about two minutes in length but this scene here is what sets dex completely on the path to becoming bullseye. no matter what, dex was going to become bullseye. nothing would’ve changed that. but this scene he completely falls into fisk’s grasp and manipulations, which sets him on a path he cannot turn back from.

the scene after when matt and ray break into his apartment, the first thing dex does is burn his therapy tapes. the therapy tapes are something that were vital to dex the majority of his life, he always kept them at arms reach to keep him in line. they were his emotional coping mechanism. so him burning them here is another crucial moment into his descent into bullseye, a destruction of his past life and coping strategies and another thing that makes the primal scream scene with fisk being something dex gives into so easily because he has nothing else. the one friend he thought he had, ray, had just lied to his face about being there for him and broken into his apartment and stolen his therapy tapes (even though matt stole them, dex didn’t know that.) matt and ray breaking into his apartment shattered the remaining sense of self he had left, in his eyes they completely violated his sense of self. his gun safe was the “real” him he kept from the world, but was something he cherished because they defined him. they had his coping mechanisms within them, the tapes being his emotional support and his weapons being his physical control. so matt and ray just breaking into his space, defiling it by listening to his therapy tapes without him knowing and then stealing them was a breaking point for him.

and fisk picks up these shattered pieces, and quite literally picking dex up from the ground in this scene and pulls him into his arms, are said pieces that will eventually build dex into the bullseye persona that he is in the comics. because that’s all he has left. dex already had these parts of bullseye within him, but he was also capable of genuine kindess and other good traits, and fisk made sure when picking up the pieces of dex to pick up the ones that would benefit only fisk, and leave out the potential goodness dex had within him. everything that fisk leaves him with by the end of the season are his negative traits and negative thoughts, which will make his volatility and instability as bullseye on another level. it’s just masterful writing i could go on and on for hours but i’ll stop myself here lol.

[sunsetsandsunshine]

Having the guts to show my art agaaaain

April O’Neil ✌🏾☺️💖🩷💕💞💘

Although no reblogs please let’s keep this on my blog 😅🙏🏾

[peteytheparrot]

Don’t know if I’m gonna finish this today so here’s the sketch now lol

[tokruta]

I can’t explain why, but this is my favorite hilson edit ever and I can/will watch it on loop for an uncountable amount of times

[rockoblanco]

been sober for 4 days so far & it’s been hard but slowly falling in love w/ my sober mind and excited to see how far i can go ❤️

[bitchslapblastoids]

dumb fic thoughts that are going to sound whiney and like personal complaints but i promise are really me talking big picture about the state of fic engagement on ao3. and i know i've been on this soapbox before and I KNOW everyone who follows me is a homie so i’m really just old man yells at skying about this again, but just let me say all the quiet parts out loud please. I do not wish to be aloof and demure.

1. hits to kudos ratios are so fucking bleak. and i don't mean wrt my own fics, i mean in general, the two numbers side by side is always so dismal to see. hits are kind of a meaningless metric, esp for chaptered fics and for fics that people return to to reread, so i wish ao3 just wouldn't publish them, because it sets up this weird pair of numbers for people to compare and jump to conclusions based upon, even though they aren't actually informative for anyone. Why do I want to know how many people clicked on something? That doesn’t tell me anything.

2. That being said (to make it about me now), I know I’m a good fic writer. and while obviously my fic isn’t going to be to everyone’s taste (puppet smut isn’t a crowdpleaser wym??), I feel pretty confident that out of the 250+ people who have clicked on my brand new fic so far, more than just 17 of them must’ve liked it. which brings me to…

3. people can get so cagey about leaving kudos on explicit fics. this is a time-tested truth. let's let go of this phenomenon! I promise no one's stalking where you've left kudos. if they are, they're a freak. and if they're judging you, they're especially a freak because HEY LOOK, they wouldn’t have seen it if they weren’t on that fic too lol! let's all try and shake off these fucking shackles of sexual shame and stigma.

4. similarly, the # of bookmarks that i can see on an explicit fic i've posted vs the # of bookmarks the public can see is so funny. This one makes more sense to me and I can understand why bookmark choices feel more private. But i will say again, people aren't judging your bookmarks. even if it's smut! no one cares what you get horny about and probably the only reason they'd be looking is bc they trust your judgment and they'd like to get horny about it too lol.

5. lack of feedback/interaction is such a scourge. We all gotta fucking engage with the writers we like! it means so much and it's such a great way to build a mutually supportive community. Also, people who have left comments on my fic and vice versa are the people i became most immediately PALS with on here. It’s a lovely thing to do and it’s not time intensive I promise! Authors don’t seek comments for validation but more because publishing fic is sharing this thing this offering that you became so obsessive and giddy about that you had to literally create it and once it’s out you just want to be giddy and obsessive with others about it.

6. Obvs no one should feel obligated to leave kudos or bookmark or comment on anything they don’t like. Be a discerning reader and engage with what brings you joy! There’s a ton of shlock out there. No one has to pretend to like it all. But societally I feel like we’ve become such selfish consumers - I see it in streaming our favorite music for .0000000000000000000000000000002 cents, in the erosion of concert etiquette, in the rabid sense of entitlement towards celebrities’ attention and time, in the uncredited circulation of other people’s art without a second thought, and in the way apparently only ~10% of readers leave kudos, which are a paltry way for an author to get a sense if someone liked something enough to take the most bare bones possible step of simply tapping a button (you don't even have to have an account! you can leave kudos as a guest!). that's a bummer. I don’t want fandom to be a selfish one-sided space where we’re just taking what we want instead of connecting or building together.

Ok, that’s all ✌️✌️✌️

[rainedroptalks]

Hot take but Teen Titans vol 3 era Cassie wasn’t that bad. Her designs were kinda terrible yes, BUT. It did have some interesting characterization and I feel like people wanna ignore that completely because they gave her lipstick?? Like how can you ignore her arc around the grief of losing her basically sister just cuz she kissed some boys or whatever. Ttvol3 Cassie definitely could’ve been better, like, leagues better, but still. It’s important to her story and it’s weird when people try to ignore it entirely

ALSO without ttvol3 we wouldn’t have had the mess that is Rose and Cassie. This is the price we have to pay for toxic yuri

[artheresy]

No but I don’t think anyone understands how deeply I need to witness Blade identity crisis content like, the focus on identity usually with the HCQ and the struggles usually centers around Dan Heng because of course! We get the content in canon touched upon, expanding on it with your own view is so much fun and I want to do it myself at some point.

But the potential of Blade? And exploring his fucked relationship with his identity and with Yingxing? MWAH, delicious, and not done enough compared to something I do see a bit whenever the topic comes up which no hate to anyone for but I have my own opinions on it

Like, shit Blade has HUGE issues with dehumanizing himself as a result of Jingliu’s teaching in which she projected her own self dehumanization onto him and taught him to turn his body into a weapon and remember the feeling of death. He doesn’t view himself as being a person, he is nothing more than a sword for slaying, a weapon whose path is soaked in the blood of both his victims and himself. And UGH listen, I’ve already ranted about this so many times that y’all are probably tired of hearing me talk about it.. it truly is one of my favorite topics, the disconnection between Yingxing and Blade that does exist in canon to certain extent. Though he takes on the weight of his sin as his own and his duty to repay it (and make sure Dan Heng repays it too), the ways in which he doesn’t connect to Yingxing in other matters is used in such a tragic way when you peel back the layers upon layers that can relate to the simplest things. Like fucking hell, not to mention it again but the use of craftsmanship between the two of them is heartbreaking as crafting represents not only what he happened to do as apart of the HCQ and in the end his legacy, but how it is used as a representation of his passion that Blade does not share, how it represents the revenge that dominated his life as Yingxing built on the pain and trauma of losing his entire family and home while still such a young child which Blade probably doesn’t even fully remember anymore let alone connect with. I swear, that hurts, it hurts me every time I think about it.

I also just have a lot of my own headcanons that I firmly don’t think are canon, but are things I instead sprinkle in like finishing salt into my wounds to make myself even more sad. Like thinking about Blade in a way constantly being in mourning, not solely for Baiheng, but genuinely in mourning for Yingxing as well. Although he used to be Yingxing, that man is still dead and gone and never coming back, never in a way that will actually be Yingxing. So I like to imagine he mourns for him as well. Not just his death but mourns the severed connection between them. The passions he cannot submerge himself in, the pure dedication he cannot fathom, the love and happiness he cannot even begin to imagine the feeling of. Or at least not the warmth of them, he only feels the bitter shards of those feelings left within him, making his hatred all the more agonizing and deep set.

Hm… I wonder how we’re going to see Blade progress as the story keeps going on. I do truly hope we get more of an exploration of this. I need to see what happens to him. I need to see how his mindset ends up evolving or instead of evolving, the sheer amount of shit it ends up getting him into. God do I love this man, sorry that my love manifests in needing to see him suffering. It just comes with the territory

[thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls]

I AM EXCITED FOR FRANCIS’S STORY!!! I WANT HIM TO GET WORSE PERSONALLY!!!

[miralines]

Don’t mind me I’m just romanticizing the fathomless intimacy that exists between the mechs… they’ve known each other for millennia, even at the best of times they hate each other at least a little, and yet… how do you know a person that long without knowing a thousand little details. They know the telltale sounds for when Nastya is crawling in the vents near them, and she knows the sounds of their footsteps and the timbre of their half-heard voices outside. They know which buttons to steal for the Toy Soldier to delight it, they know Ashes will never ask for it but that they love to be touched, they know that the surest way to make Jonny grin in that real, genuine, bright way he claims to not be capable of is to laugh at one of his puns, or better yet, to respond in kind… and they know, too, how to push each other over the edge, the quickest way to pick fights and hurt each other… but that, too, is a kind of intimacy, and nothing but a sign of how deeply they know each other. How, for better or worse, they are together forever, and that is a bond beyond mortal comprehension

[mattstoneenjoyer]

it’s interesting to me that a lot of ppl see that commentary clip of trey talking abt how shelley used to beat the shit out of him as him joking

[mysicklove]

delete in a bit, but i am indecisive so help me