#maybe a seahorse bc I remember him being long

[newts-and-sharks]

Yo I just had a dream where I was an under water temple explorer and I was inside one and I found two relics and somehow they opened up and the first one was a water dragon Sun and I was terrified but he was so sweet and then moon popped out and he was such a grumpy sleepy boy and they were treating me like they already knew me and eventually the temple was under attack I think and sun grew to be so big and slipped out and destroyed all the threats, he was pissed, and I think eventually there were baby sun and moons, but I’m not sure how that happened-

[mcalhenwrites]

So in preparation for moving, I'm going through all my stuff. I have a donation box, I have stuff I need to mail people (esp if I can get to some WIPs of gifts I have)... It's a bit overwhelming, bc health is so bad that getting everything done is hard. (That's also why I started packing last week. I know I can't do it at once with my low spoons.)

The elephant was made for a friend but I haven't talked to him in a long while (we just fell out of touch) and the poor thing is homeless, and this baby blanket continues to be unsold. I really wish I could place them somewhere and actually make some money (which would help, bc moving + S&H of some of the gifts I want to finish and send). But yeah. (Also, I hate etsy, I only use it to shop, and a lot of the artists I was buying from are begging for people to use their shops from their own websites due to the cut etsy takes these days. I don't have resources or web know-how, so... yeah. Whatever. haha.) Also, I miss my gremlin cat, she fucked up these (seahorse is mine iirc, but she got the cat charm's ear)... I really think the cat charm isn't too bad, maybe it could have a home someday too.

Then there's my collection of shit that I just... have either finished or is nearly finished or just needs a little more work?

I don't remember what stitch I was even USING on that baby blanket. The bunny just needs sewn. (Hate.) Same with the fucking pumpkin, that square bit of orange ombre. XD ACE FLAG TURTLE... That was supposed to be for a friend. Appa??? (I have yet to watch Avatar, meant to and never did, but I THINK that's the name) TEEPO (for myself) (I might be able to salvage it?) Um... Tikki from Miraculous Butterfly bc I wanted to make her, but never fucking finished... A PIG? A BUNNY? DUMPLING? CAT? I don't know. It's a fucking graveyard. This is only a dent in my WIPs, bc I still have Willow, Tessa, Lester (all OCs)... I packed Tessa and Lester away though. They'll wait till after the move. I want Willow done... if I can settle on his design finally LOL I also found a friend who runs a studio who'll take a bit of yarn I don't want off my hands. (Same one that Appa??? is meant for, actually, so maybe I can send it all together???) AND I FOUND IGNIS I WILL FINISH HIM FOR LATT I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD I WILL NOT LET THAT POOR MAN GO UNFINISHED (plus he can be sent with other stuff) And I know I have a sore spot about people always interacting with my crochet but ignoring my writing especially when I said, "I'm quitting crochet bc of fibro and to focus on my writing" and people reacted badly to the news, as if I wasn't posting shit like this years before I quit:

Yeah. Not sad that's behind me. ;A; Especially when I'm posting stuff like this and still wholly feel this sentiment:

And never had time to do it. And it felt like no one cared, and only recently does it feel like finally people do want my writing. IDK it's painful. It's a mess. I don't know if I can easily go back to crochet. If I do, I have to be so fucking careful to never fall into this pit, and I honestly am anxious about this post bc it's clear I do want to make gifts... but that attracted so many bad characters into my life. The free pattern demands, the free gift demands, some people being one week into trying to be my friend and thinking they're being crafty sending me amigurumi pictures of their favorite characters and going "I wish I had this" COOL GO LEARN TO CROCHET :) And people seeing what I did and never even commenting on my work, just going "pattern?!" or going "how did you do such and such and such" as if I am an instructor with all the free time in the world.

So that's why I only post OCs, and why I have told people not to share their gifts if they do get them... or to just simply not credit me if they post them. Do not leave a trail back to me. XD So yeah, weird history with crochet, but... maybe I'll get some OCs done after I clear stuff out. Focus on myself, bc I never do, despite saying I will. I seldom make myself the things I want to. And it's my time, materials, and spoons! Also, no, if I finish stuff, I'm not posting images unless it is OC related, unless it's a rare time like now that I'm okay with displaying a few projects. Which is nearly never. I have my writing back. I'm still depressed af, but mental health is still tons better bc I stopped guilting myself that my writing time needed to be crochet time. I missed it so bad. Not crying bc I am relieved, nope. :') (I'm crying.)

[starkeaton]

the adventure zone: graduation character list

Well, i accidentally deleted the original graduation character list post, so here i am making another one. Oops. And as always, if anyone has important details i should add then feel free to suggest them!

Here are all the characters introduced in episodes 1-25. Named characters only!

Also i can’t hide spoilers! So, um..... I can’t put spoilers on this one. If you need the version with spoilers try this version of the post that i made on the adventure zone subreddit but youre not missing out on much.

# -EPISODE 1- (19 characters)

Hieronymous Wiggenstaff (he/him): Head of the Hero/Villain school. at least 400 years old. wears shining blue armor with gold accents. also an elf. according to Tomas, he led the charge at the "battle of blood valley", brought the Kingdoms of Rickart and Dawnbreak to a peace treaty, and founded the school. a little boastful, a little prideful, [SPOILERS OMITTED], and overall a pretty good dude.

Higglemas Wiggenstaff (he/him): Head of the Sidekick/Henchperson annex, cranky old elf. has a dog named hero who shows no signs of anything strange at all, ever. 

Gary (he/him): friendly room gargoyle. pseudo-hivemind.

Groundsy (he/him): the groundskeeper. a pretty nice fellow. don't go in his shed.

Hernandez (he/him): beautiful centaur professor of animal handling.

Jimson (he/him): human battlegrounds trainer for sidekicks/henchpeople, world famous featherweight champion, wields a staff. married to crushman.

Crushman (he/him): silver dragonborn with a sickle, and self-described beefy boy! heavyweight blood champion married to jimson. never lost a match for 8 years. full name Frostus Crushman.

Rolandus Fontaine (he/him): former prince, son of deposed king, kind of an asshole, maybe. wears a cape (important detail)

Zana (she/her): "terrifying" tiefling villain sorcerer, friend of rolandus. barkept the test tavern in ep2

Rhodes (she/her): hero ranger, friend of rolandus.

Buckminster Eden (he/him): hero guy. son of "The Iron Lord". their dad is stronger than rolandus's dad. his wiki page says rogue so i think hes a rogue? i never caught that and ive listened more times than i wish i did

Leon (he/him): softspoken buff, bald "fighter" (although i dont remember any clarification on how exactly he fights), sidekick of buckminster, around 28. anyone else keep forgetting he's bald? i keep forgetting it. >!gets sorta-drafted into becoming a falcon for higglemas and so far hasn't done much else.!<

Rainer Michelle (she/her): cheerful villainous necromancer with a floating chair. also, her name is pronounced "rainier" despite not being confirmed as such? travis ships her with fitzroy.

Tomas (he/him): human man with "kind eyes" and a good (psychic???) memory. guidance counselor.

Stewart LeBoeuf (he/him): brawny human man. serves food. there is no joke here, i promise

Mulligan (he/him): teaches potions. mentioned but doesn't appear yet. and we're like 25 episodes in. maybe we'll see him someday

Germaine, Victoria, Rattles (he/him,she/her,???/???): Skeleton crew. They live in the training room i guess, and as a result can never die, because "no one dies in the training room!" (note: someone now HAS to die in the training room). also their races are never explicitly stated but i guess they're probably human? in episode 3 travis brings up something about how many bones are in "the human body" and at this point i think i'm looking too deep into this so i'll just forget about it and you probably should too.

# -EPISODE 2- (9 characters)

Riveau (he/him): halfling, blame-taking teacher.

Mimi (they/them): gnome sidekick who builds cool robot prosthetics

Bartholemus (he/him): owl aarakocra accountant teacher, known for being the best accountant in the land and having a face some might describe as "smoochable". very pro capitalist :’( hope he gets better

Ramos (she/her): goliath teacher of shieldwork. *

Dip (she/her): sidekick, half-orc twin of pip

Pip (she/her): hero, half-orc twin of dip

Festo (they/them): fairy with "beautiful gossamer wings", independent study teacher of magic, loves to party

Snippers (he/him?): Let me tell you my story about Snippers the magic crab. When Travis gave the list of animals that Griffin could choose as Fitzroy's familiar's current form, he listed crab near the start, and this gave me excitement. Now i knew that crab was pretty unlikely but god i hoped that he would choose it. When the list went on- Bat, Cat, Crab, Frog, Hawk, Lizard, Owl, Poisonous Snake, Fish, Rat, Raven, Seahorse, Spider or Weasel- I nearly lost hope. I was hoping so hard that Griffin would choose the crab, but i was ready to accept a non-crab familiar. It was just buried in that list. It wasn't the most useful animal and it was an obscure pick. And as Travis informed him that it didn't have to keep the form for the whole campaign, Griffin said those five words i wanted to hear so, so badly. "Well then it's a crab." Folks, I do not often react physically when something happens in media. But in that moment, i remember very clearly, i fist-pumped and yelled, "YES!!!!!!"

so anyway, Fitzroy has a crab.

Jackle (he/him): kenku teacher of sneakery. creepy dude. apparently knows something about argo? also his name is not spelled "jackal" for some reason. Also in later episodes theyve started calling him "The Jackle" for some reason??? *

# -EPISODE 3- (1 character)

Dakota (they/them): tavern instructor, clad in black/red leather. no race stated? probably human. *

# -EPISODE 4- (6 characters)

Gerry & Tom (she/her, he/him): shopkeepers at barns and nobles who seem to have very bad names. also constantly competing for customers? these guys got dropped faster than the heathcliff quests, which is honestly just sad.

Barb (she/her): the bartender. runs Springs Eternal in Last Hope. has a sweet seeing-eye hawk familiar. 

Jaryd Reginald (he/him): owner of Reginald Ore. Wants the workers to be held responsible for the damage caused by the xorn. (fun fact: originally i wrote down "Jerrod" because i wanted it to sound like a fantasy name, then realized it was probably "Jared" because theyre named after listeners, but i was pleased to find it confirmed that it's actually "Jaryd")

Candice (she/her): A Miner. thought those werent allowed in bars but, i guess not. Wants the mine owner to be held responsible for the xorn's damage.

Jade Johnson Esq. (she/her): lawyer.

# -EPISODE 5- (1 character)

Xorn: a big hungry gem eating guy from the plane of earth Low-Down Deep with 3 arms and 3 legs. why did travis just say "multi-armed" instead of specifying it was 3? who knows! Anyway it leaves

# -EPISODE 6- (3 characters)

Osric (he/him): the man, the myth, the bursar. finally shows up after being mentioned in episodes 2 and 4. he's an elf. 

breeze through the willows (she/her): Pegasus attacked by demons, lost her parents. introduced in ep1 but gets a name here so fuck it. also in ep>!16!< we find out shes a "white arabian pegasus" and i dont think thats a spoiler bc we shouldve really known it from the beginning

Sabor (he/him): Librarian/research teacher. also a TORTLE. Really good at recalling stuff, i guess. kinda reminds me of Tomas's memory thing but i'm sure that's just a coincidence... *

# -EPISODE 7- (1 character)

Mosh (he/him): The goliath blacksmith who welcomes argo into the unbroken chain. Also, and this is specific to the tumblr version of this post, all the characters with an * at the end of their descriptions are also members of the unbroken chain. if someone knows how to do spoilers on tumblr please tell me

# -EPISODE 8-

:)

# -EPISODE 9- (2 characters)

Eeiïäá#æ&éñn (pronounced like "Ian") (he/him?): an imp but without a shitty voice. also happens to not be violent. what a coincidence?

Terence (he/him): a chain devil with a real demonic name. minor boss of the imps. very convincing and very threatening. has the frightening ability to make you zone out during his fight

# -EPISODE 10- (2 characters)

Althea Song (she/her): elf with autumn-orange hair. representative from heroic oversight guild. i'd like to personally thank travis for spelling her name out.

Crabtree (she/her): Artificing teacher. Long gray hair with a long grey beard. no mentioned race, one might guess dwarf but that would be an assumption i suppose. also unbroken chain member, presumably the dwarf argo didn't recognize in episode 7.

# -EPISODE 11- (3 characters)

Marie (she/her): Grey-haired elf woman. She's the school's physician, i guess. Member of the unbroken chain.

Dendra Maplecourt (she/her): Fitzroy's mom. Has hot mint gum, i guess. She was mentioned earlier but i wasn't convinced she was a real person until this episode

Cool Gary (he/him): AYY ITS ME GARYR

# -EPISODE 12-

no new characters again!

# -EPISODE 13- (7 characters hhhyyyuu)

Kale (???/???): Head of the Placement Department, in charge of real world assignments. First mentioned in Ep4 but i missed that the last few times bc it is so brief. Gives exposition about missions i guess????? is that the only reason this chara cter exists

satyr thief (unnamed) (he/him): tries to rob thundermen, dies instantly

Ogre (he/him): teamed up with the satyr. his name is ogre.

Moon (he/him): A Sidekick. small pale sullen guy. no mentioned race. Why is there another FUCKING sidekick WE HAD ENOUGH hhhyuuuuuu

Deanna (she/her): A bigoted centaur with an obnoxious voice. Malwin the Strong's second in command.

Malwin the Strong (she/her): Leader of the centaurs of the scarlet woods. Wants to appease the spirit of the scarlet woods so that thecentaurs of the scarlet woods will be protected in the scarlet woods. Had a relationship with Arturas in the past but their clashes are currently known to get pretty heated.

Arturas (he/him): Leader of the Centaurs of the Valley, i guess. Had a relationship with Malwin. Centaur. Did i mention centaur? i cant think of anything else about this character

# -EPISODE 14- (2 characters)

Calhain (he/him): Human wizard, Malwin's magical advisor. Kind of an amateur wizard in a job high above his skill level. Graduated Wigginstaff's as a hero.

Spirit of the Scarlet Woods: A spirit who requires sacrifice in order to keep Malwin's herd safe and prosperous. Not keen on dubiously canonical combos, i guess. i wouldnt be either. also apparently the sacrifice depends on personal value, not how much value it has to the spirit.

# -EPISODE 15- (2 characters)

Sylvia Nite (she/her): Fitzroy's magic theory teacher at knight night school, who he turned into a catfish by accident. oops!

Chaos (they/them, maybe more): Presumably a deity, gave Fitz his powers and wants him to give in to his chaotic desires. (physical desc: 9 foot tall, iridescent 'mother of pearl' skin, pure white eyes, fine burgundy cloak with gold/onyx lining. their physical form beyond that seems to change every time they show up.)

# -EPISODE 16-

none -w-

# -EPISODE 17-

some demins happened. the big dudes are called "Pit Fiends" and the armored demon ladies are called "Erinyes", by the way. that was incredibly hard for me to figure out the first time, especially without headphones, i thought travis was saying "pig feet" and i just could not discern what the other things were

# -EPISODE 18- (6 characters)

snow on the mountain: shire horse pegasus

storm at sea: peruvian paso pegasus, vehement defender of The Guardian. doesn't have a goofy voice.. but he could have....

thaw of the spring: a winged horse

night of no clouds: a winged hhorse

The Guardian: "An ancient and powerful being that guards the unknown forest." Has protected the flock from demons for many many years. apparently is the voice that was talking to our firbolg in episode 1?

Grey, the Demon Prince (he/him): wants to cause a war, originally wanted to kill hiero and higgs, forces the heroes to build an army to fight his. As "Fauxronimous", he has skin the *color and pattern of* (but not necessarily made of) slate splashed with liquid, pointed ears, sharp teeth, shining eyes, horns of unspecified shape. 12 fucking feet tall. wonder if the slate-looking skin is related to garys. plot twist detected? Also i recently looked at the episode descriptions and found out his name is spelled "Gray", but really does it truly matter?

# -EPISODE 19- (2 characters)

Shabree Keene (she/her): Argo's mom, killed on the Mariah, possibly by the Commodore. Long auburn hair, green eyes. Mentioned earlier but described here, so fuck it.

**Thomas** (he/him): Argo's first mate on the Mariah, as the Kraken, in his chaos-dream. may or may not actually exist.

# -EPISODE 20- (1 character)

The Commodore (he/him): Reknowned hero of the seas, military regalia, great naval hero, presumably responsible for the death of Shabree Keene. No mentioned race. Seriously, they never mention this guy's race. The only thing described about him is how he's dressed and his evil smile. Does that mean he's human? Elf? Dwarf??? Who knows! maybe it just doesnt matter. 

# -EPISODE 21-

none

# -EPISODE 22-

not any of them. not any.

# -EPISODE 23- (1 character)

Ozymondelius (sp???) (it/its): A warforged teacher who just so happens to like war or something? i guess its in the name. only mentioned in this episode, doesnt show up yet.

# -EPISODE 24-

they have a fight in the training room but nobody dies :\\ maybe next time. also no new characters. pog

# -EPISODE 25- (4 characters)

Gherkin (he/him): Tall lankier skeleton, has a scimitar and a merkin, which is a pubic wig... and he wears a jerkin? which i guess is a kind of coat? also i think hes mute 

Tibia (she/her?) : Shorter skeleton with gold teeth, and long canines. i think both of the skeletons are mute actually.

The Lich King aka Gordy (he/him): Rainer's dad. Commands armies of the undead. lives in The Crypt. described as a hooded, skull-faced man with intricate black lines on his face, but changes to a shaved-head man with dark skin and vetiligo. Abandoned as a babby, raised by traveling parents, had necromancy powers, took Rainier in. Not actually very scary at all i don't know why he did the creepy laugh. Kind of a warm fatherly figure actually. hm. also people are speculating Gordy might be short for Gordita and his parents are maybe supposed to be lup and barry but THAT S JUST A THEORY.

our firbolg's father (he/him): A firbolg who lived by the code and was there when our firbolg was banished. Came to respect our firbolg's interest in a new way of life, in his final moments.

TOTAL: 72 NPCS! (well, including 2 extra PCs, i guess.)

Average: 2.88 NPCs per episode.

i was gonna not include the bone-PCs and have it be 69 but our firbolg's dad was just too important to not respect with a spot on the list.

anyway as always make sure to smack me with a blunt object if i forgot any characters!!!!!

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #034

“this city is a prostitute”

Has anyone ever tried to ruin a relationship you were in? Yup, and it worked, and sometimes I think she mighta saved my life by it lmao and we're friends now. Have you ever watched a whole hour long infomercial? Ha ha yes, on a vacuum w/ Girt. He'll make fun outta anything. Which one of your exes do you feel like you have the most chemistry with? Jason. I think, anyway. I don't know how much he's changed. Have you ever personally known a pair of conjoined twins? No. What was the most disturbing thing you have ever heard your mother say? This was many years ago, but it was something along the lines of, "You being in here is the only reason I don't drive this car into a tree," which she said in a BIG fight we were having while driving what, 70 mph? It upset the hell out of me, and even remembering she said that stresses me out. I don't want to know if she meant it or not. Is there something in particular you like to look at photos of? What is it? Meerkats, Rammstein, and Mark bc they bring me such immense joy. ;__; Do you think your grandmother is/was beautiful? In all honesty I don't even remember how Dad's mom looked, but my mom's mother was very pretty. She was very attentive to her appearance. When was the last time you got all dolled up? Oh jeez, I have NO idea. Do you have a criminal record? Nope. Last person you took a nap with? Girt. Does seeing your mother cry automatically make you feel sad as well? OHHHHHHH, YES. I naturally get EXTREMELY upset, extremely quickly when my mom is crying. It feels almost like a role switch, like I'm a mother protecting her like a child. I immediately want to no less than obliterate what's causing her to hurt. It's why I hate my fucking uncle as much as I do, because I CAN'T do anything. Do you think someone likes the same person you like? I mean maybe, he's not at all hard to like, but I trust him with my life so it's not something I worry about. Have you ever been to craigslist.com? Yep, I've even adopted (out) pets from and through there. What about eBay? Yes, I've also bought games via eBay. Have you ever used Nair? Yes, because of how difficult shaving is for me. Turns out, it's just as fucking painful and time-consuming with all the bending and twisting and shit. Have you ever stolen/borrowed clothes from an ex? Borrowed, yes, unintentionally "stole" ig cuz they just... stayed in my dresser. They're still there, lmfao, they just sure as hell won't fit me. Could you make a statement about anything political? HI could we please like let people who have uteruses control whatever the fuck goes on in them thanks p.s. fuck the supreme court Do you enjoy romantic movies, even when they’re cliche? Haha yeeeaaah, I do. Have you been to McDonald’s in the past month? Yes. Have you ever slept over at your best friend’s house? Not yet, no. Last time you were in an apartment? Oh WOW, probably not since Colleen lived in one and I was visiting. Have you ever seen a live seahorse? At aquariums, yes. <3 Has a stranger ever offered to buy you a drink? No, ew. What kind of music does your significant other/crush like to listen to? Pretty much the same stuff as me: metal, rock, indie, etc. Who did you have your first kiss with? Do you remember what colour his/her eyes were? Jason, first real boyfriend, blah blah, his eyes are brown. What is your favorite messaging program? Discord. What’s the scariest living animal that you’ve petted? I mean, I suppose a tarantula, even though they're not that "scary" to me. I should mention though you're not supposed to "pet" a tarantula, some (like the one I held) have irritating hairs on their abdomens that will rub off and lodge into your skin and cause an itchy rash. Which I got. It wasn't fun, lol. Choose one - Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers: Oh, EASILY Milky Ways. Butterfingers are only okay, and I don't like Snickers. Who is your favorite person to hug? omg Girt, BEST hugs Have you ever had to have a mug shot? No. Have you ever seen an alligator in person? Yeah! The alligator exhibit at our zoo is actually pretty cool. Are you good at ping pong? Absolutely not, no. I don't have that quick hand-eye coordination for it. Does it annoy you when people’s eyebrows are a different color than hair? I don't care, dude. Have you ever seen a snake in the road? Yes actually, me and a friend TRIED herding it off the path (I lived in the woods at the time, down a path practically no one touched), but it was tooootally unfazed, and I wasn't entirely confident in what species it was so I wasn't going to touch it. I didn't want to scare it either. We got someone to go around it, but when we came back later, the little guy was dead/run over, AHHHHHHHHHHHH Have you ever heard a wolf howl? Not irl, no. Do you get sleepy when you ride in the car? Yes. Have you ever thought about joining a nunnery/monastery? That's a very passionate "hell no," I am Lil Nas giving Satan a lapdance Whose birthday is coming up soon? My nephew's!! :') Do you know anyone who lives in Hawaii? I actually have a cousin that lives there, but I don't even remember her name/I've definitely never met her. Do you delete people from Facebook if their views are vastly different than yours? Yup, in most cases, if they're truly offensive beliefs. I don't go on Facebook to get angry at dumbasses that can't seem the grasp the concept of equality, get off my feed. Who’s your favorite director? Tim Burton. What would you do if you accidentally got pregnant? Tell solely Girt and my mom and quietly get an abortion as well as almost certainly ramping my therapy visit frequency WAY the fuck up because with how my anxiety and self-esteem work I am QUITE CERTAIN I'd feel like a fucking monster even when I am strictly pro-choice; I wasn't always that way and i KNOW it would try to creep back in and convince me I did something horrible. What was the last thing you had the urge to do? Uhhh... I'm not sure, if we're talking an urge I had but didn't do. Is there anyone you feel that takes you for granted? I don't, no. Do you ever read the comments on social media posts? Not usually, but sometimes I get curious. What was the last thing you felt like you wasted money on? Well, the movie tickets to The Black Phone considering the, uh, "event." We probably didn't even see half the movie. I'm not bitter about the lost money though, it feels good to just know I tried treating my boyfriend to something and not the other way around for once. What was the last thing you wanted to buy, but couldn’t afford? Haha okay so Girt mentioned recently how much he wants a physical, unpatched copy of Xenoblade 2 PURELY to experience the game's meme that is OBNOOOOXIOUS spamming of battle lines (that's the shit that humors this man). I pretty much knew I wouldn't have the money for it, but regardless, I did a lil Google search and yeah babe I'm sorry I physically Can't I am Poor Are you friends with your family members on any social media platforms? Facebook, yeah. Are there any TV shows you constantly quote or know almost every line to? I don't think so. What do you think about lizards? Oh goodness guys, I love lizards. They're usually so goofy-looking and walk like fucking idiots and I simply adore them. I want to get a few lizards. :( What is your goal in life? I don't really enjoy thinking about this because I WANT to do SOMETHING meaningful and decently impressive with this short lil life, but I don't think it's gonna happen. I guess I kinda live now with the idea of wanting to be an example of love and what it means to live a life by love. Even if I don't accomplish much, I want to make good people happy and let them know they're valued. Who is your hero and why? I have a few, really. The ones that immediately come to mind are Markiplier and Rhett & Link/GMM, as they LITERALLY got my ass through 2016 in particular. I, I shit you the actual fuck not, was almost ALWAYS watching them/had them on while I just laid in bed wanting to die. They made me chuckle and smile when nothing else could. So I actually owe my life to them, and I think that's a hero. I also consider my former psychiatrist a hero for being the one motherfucker who knew how to configure my medications. He, genuinely, felt like a dad to me over the years he treated me. I miss him. Then of course there's obviously my mother, who I also wouldn't be here without. She has physically held me down from trying to kill myself and A L W A Y S has been by my side. No matter what stupid thing I did, she would hold my hand through it. She continues to. I don't like to imagine where the HELL I would be if it weren't for her. Probably dead, really. Can you write any HTML? Nooo. Trying certain things while making DP made me realize JUST how shit I am at coding stuff. Like fr my greatest achievement with HTML is probably just properly inputting a fucking banner on my Tumblr page, sobbing emoji. How do you feel about religion? It's one of the largest sources of hate and violence and I wish it was never a conceived idea. Where is your favorite place to shop for clothes? Rebel's Market and Hot Topic. Do you feel like you have to be in a relationship to be happy? No, but I do know I'm happier in one, as much as I wish that wasn't the case. I wish it had zero effect on my happiness. What’s the nicest thing you’ve done for someone? I don't know. I mean I guess you could consider me donating at least 8+ inches of my hair when I chopped it all off to be nice, but I didn't do it JUST to be nice - the leading motivation was I just simply wanted it gone. Getting that little certificate in the mail informing me it helped a child though FUCKED ME UPPPPPPP. Are you a racist person? If you are genuinely racist in 20fucking22, wake the actual fuck up. Can you sleep with your eyes open? No, that shit creeps me out. Is there anything you’re excited for right now? Girt is gonna be here TOMORROWWWWWWW Who said "I love you" first in your current/last relationship? I did. What was the last thing you said? "What was THAT?" to my mom when I went to go get a drink. Cookie did this weird gag noise. Do you have bad vision? It's absolutely atrocious; I need new glasses like NOW, but not 'til I believe next month... What song speaks to you the most? I feel like "False Flags" by Massive Attack with my political stance/disgust over this country and really everywhere else, too. Every single fucking line, and there's A LOT, is a disguised sigh at the world. I don't even LIKE politics and yet this song just lights a fire in me. There are lots of other songs too, like I'm thinking and more are coming to me, BUT I don't wanna ramble on this question forever, so we'll just go with my first instinct. Do you like French toast? So last time at the hospital, the only other person in my hall (til the last day) once traded all her French toast for my what, eggs? Yeah yeah I remember she really liked their eggs, which were pretty good if you added salt and pepper, and this MADWOMAN didn't want ANY of her French toast. Safe to say a bitch had herself a lot of carbs that morning but idgaf best bargain of my life. I hope that woman's doing well, she had some MEGA family and relationship problems, and she was capable of being incredibly rude and pushy with the nurses and doctor, but to BOTH of us that place felt like a goddamn prison. I honestly probably wouldn't have befriended her in normal circumstances, but for real, I fucking promise you when you're in a VERY poor-quality mental hospital, you and your wingmates are in that shit together. You support each other. And it was just us two for a long time. ... WOW this was a question about French toast. Do you own an engagement ring? No. What do you want for Christmas this year? Oh, wow... it's over halfway through the year. I was gonna make a comment about how it's pretty early but um what the fuck happened to 2022?????? Anyway idk, probably my Teddy tattoo over Sara's handwriting because I just want that gone and it's been too long since Teddy's passed. I wanna be able to look down and smile at his face. Do you understand Chuck Norris jokes? HAHAHA yes, but I think most people do. Though every time I see/hear one, I just think of WoW and the Barrens zone in the game's original incarnation because for some fucking reason I either don't remember or never learned, telling Chuck Norris jokes in chat became this.......... thing. And so so so many years later, whenever I fly over the Northern Barrens to get somewhere for whatever reason, I just autopilot and watch the fucking chatbox like "where's chuck norris jokes where's chuck norris jokes wh-" aND SURE ENOUGH SEEING ONE ISN'T RARE. Maaaaan now I feel like playing it again. Do you like the color pink? bitch I BREATHE pink Are you afraid of stink bugs? Ehhhh I'm not "afraid" of them, but I'm not a fan, either. Do you not agree that gas prices are ridiculous? Of course I do, but can we please stop fucking blaming Biden for a G L O B A L problem, gas has increased EVERYWHERE. Name one event that made you happy today. :) I FINALLY got my fucking hair trimmed. Got quite a bit done today, actually. What song represents your life the best? I resonate most with "Get Up" by Mother Mother. Do you prefer day over night? Yes; it being light outside helps keep my depression at bay. What is your worst feature? You're talking to a person that hates like... everything about her body. I mean, I guess I can list one hated feature that reaches back before I gained a shitload of weight, and that is how very dark my body hair is. PITCH black. I want laser hair removal on my legs SO fucking bad. What is the last thing you’ve eaten? Oh god, I went real unhealthy and got a burger from Sonic + their new Sour Patch Kids Slush Float and I found god again through that fuckling slushy lmfaoooo even my mom, who had "a sip," nearly turned the fuckin car around to get one herself like, twice, haha. It was DELICIOUS. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed awake for? Like, three days? Around that? Do you still like to take naps? Absolutely, but I have been taking them less since I now always sit in the spare room versus lay in my bed. I've stopped experiencing edema in my legs from sitting at the desk so progress, baby. :') Do you watch the Disney Channel? Nope. I did growing up, though.

[lovelikeelena]

Song of the Sirenas Review- Part 1/4

Firstly, I wanna say muchas gracias to my best friend, Becca, along with DisneyNerd, DisPrincess3 and others for helping me with some of the visual aspects of this awesome, incredible and amazing movie!

  As many of you know who read my tumblr, I’m almost blind.  That means this review will be unique.  While I’ll be touching on some important visual aspects, I’ll mostly be focusing on storyline and the friendships formed and established bonds between our favorite characters throughout the movie.  There will also be some shipping as well, just so you guys who aren’t Elenaomi shippers know ahead of time.  One more thing before we officially get started:  How cool was it that this movie premiered on international peace day?  This makes it even more timely and relevant than ever!  Okay, let’s dive in!  Pun intended wholeheartedly.

  We open with a spectacular view of the Turner’s boat skimming through the water.  The royal familia, royal guard Gabe and Naomi , along with her parents Captains Scarlet and Daniel Turner, are heading somewhere.  Hmmm?  Where could they be going?  Maybe they’re dropping the douche of Avalor, Esteban off on a deserted island and continuing without him.  Only one can hope.  (I DID NOT come up with that nickname for the chancellor.) Oh yeah, Mateo’s there too.  Well, Esteban isn’t being dropped off anywhere.  No such fortune is shining upon us.  Instead, Elena is stuck with her cousin for the entire journey.  It’s not long into her magical bow and arrow practice that Naomi gets Esteban right in the butt!  Elena giggles, even though she tries to remain stern.  Oops, Sorry!  never mind.  That’s my fanfic version of events.  Back to the actual movie. 

  As I was saying, it’s not long before we find out Scarlet doesn’t take any crap from anyone-including her husband!  She finds Daniel standing, using a barrel as a table.  Poor Daniel just wants to eat a sandwich, but instead he’s told to trim the sail.  He tries to get out of it by assuming bc his wife is captaining the voyage that he would get a well-deserved brake.  No such luck buddy.  Say adios to that break you were hoping for.  Turning, Daniel goes to complete the task.  Before leaving his post, he snatches up his sandwich, knowing his daughter too well, not to mention the fact that there are two hungry teen boys on the ship.  It’s then that Isa answers the question that’s been on our minds since the movie started-especially if you haven’t read the book companion that was released in June or kept up with spoilers before the movie premiered.  The royal familia is on their way to Nueva Vista on the west coast of Avalor.  Isa is excited to get there and her abuela feels the same way.  Louisa mentions sitting on the terrace of the summer palace and napping in the sun.  Esteban puts his two cents in, commenting that Francisco has gotten a head start, indicating him sleeping on a chair.  On another part of the ship, Elena is hanging out with Naomi and Gabe, practicing with her scepter.  Elena demonstrates a few powers we’ve seen in the past-including envision and glow.  Then she shows off a newly acquired power, which is making objects invisible by saying the word vanish.  She uses Naomi’s lasso for this test.  It works and Elena beams.  Gabe asks how many powers the scepter has.  Naomi chimes in by requesting teasingly if her girlfriend can test them on something else bc she wants her lasso back.  Unfortunately, this is the last time in the movie that we see Elena and Naomi treating each other with the love and respect we’ve come to know they possess.  Just knowing this makes me sad.  Hopefully, they’ll resolve things fully in Snow Place Like Home.  I love how Isa comes up to them and is fully welcome by Elena and not told to go away like most older siblings say to the younger ones when with their friends and significant others.  Isa tells them that Scarlet said they’re almost there.  Elena starts to reminisce about her and Isa’s first paternal cousin, Christobal, telling everyone how she remembers going fishing with him every summer.  Gabe is puzzled and says he thought Esteban  was the girls’ only cousin.  Naomi throws her usual jab at the Chancellor by stating “Leave it to Esteban to exaggerate.”  She lays a hand on Elena’s shoulder, initiating the only loving contact they have for the rest of the movie.    In making that jab at the douche, she exemplifies why I love her so much!  Mateo, yup, he’s there, tells Elena she’ll have plenty of time to reminisce when they arrive and it’s time to get back to practicing.  Come on, dude, give Elena a break!  Mateo encourages her to try to make herself vanish.  Elena protests that she only knows how to make objects vanish.  Mateo is insistent, so our favorite future Avaloran ruler obeys.  Elena, there’s no law that says you must listen to him!  You make the laws or will be doing so in three years!  After trying the power, Elena mildly succeeds.  Her body disappears, but her head is still visible.  Mateo makes a lame joke that doesn’t even make any sense by saying “You’re headed in the right direction.”  Leave the quips to Naomi, por favor.  Elena reforms just as all five of them hear a bell ring, followed by Scarlet yelling about approaching sirenas.  All four young adults have different reactions to Scarlet’s announcement.  Elena is confused, while Mateo is all excited and looking every which way like a puppy who is trying to find his new bone.  Apparently, he’s never seen a sirena before.  Gabe is also curious.  Naomi is ready to obey her parents’ instructions at a second’s notice.  Scarlet commands her to take the wheel, calling Naomi Nomes, which I despise!  Naomi does so while her parents ready the crossbows.  Elena shakes her head upon hearing this and asks why they need the weapons?  And this is where I get a little irritated with Naomi.  I know she’s panicking, but still.  She whirls around and snaps at her girlfriend for no reason.  “Sirenas are dangerous!  Everyone knows that!”  Excuse me, Naomi, everyone knows that?  Not everyone has traveled as extensively or has the knowledge you do.  Especially your girlfriend who was trapped in an amulet for 41 years!  Daniel explains to Elena that sirenas sing a song that put sailors into a trance, crashing their ships.  Even though he too is panicking, he doesn’t snap at her.  Take a lesson from your Dad, Naomi.  Elena points out the sirenas aren’t even singing and Mateo chimes in that he can’t remember the last time sirenas caused a ship wreck.  Still, the Turners go through with their defense plan.  Glancing down into the water, Elena locks eyes with a female sirena.  We later learn her name is Marisa.  In the moment their eyes meet, Elena is captivated in wonderment-never having seen a sirena before this.  I’d like to think  she’s also silently assuring Marisa that she knows Marisa isn’t doing anything wrong and that she, Elena, won’t let any harm come to her.  Meanwhile, Scarlet commands Gabe to get everyone below deck, which he does immediately.  Elena commands Scarlet to stop firing.  Instead of listening, Scarlet fires anyway.  Correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s grounds for treason.  Scarlet defied Elena’s direct command.  Eighteen or not, Elena is in charge.  If she says stop firing, you stop firing-no questions asked.  Scarlet, you just keep slipping further and further down my like meter.  It looks like there’s one more in Esteban’s party on that deserted island if they find one.  Elena keeps her silent promise to Marisa and fires her scepter, knocking Scarlet’s crossbow out of her hands.  This affectively saves Marisa and her male companion from injury.  We switch points of view and see Marisa, her friend and seahorse dude in the water.  We discover that the male friend is actually Marisa’s twin brother.  Marisa is just as amazed by Elena.  She asked if her brother saw what Elena did, then must keep him from retaliating.  She calls him Marzel and tells him to stop!  Marzel argues that the people on the ship tried to fillet them to which Marisa points out,  “But the princesa stopped them with that magic thingy.”  Marzel advises they better leave before she decides to use it on them.  Their seahorse friend agrees, and they dive beneath the waves.  Meanwhile, back on the Turners boat, Naomi again turns on her girlfriend, demanding,  “Why did you do that!”  Elena doesn’t take her crap and shoots back with,  “I’m not going to attack someone who hasn’t attacked me first!”  As much as I love watching Elena stand up for herself, my heart breaks a little more.  I don’t like it when Elena and her future wife fight.  I know it happens in every friendship-whether it’s destined for romance or not.  Even so, it’s still hard for me to watch when it's Elena and Naomi. Meanwhile, under the sea, Marisa and Marzel are swimming towards the palace they share with their parents.  Marzel points out that “Sirenas haven’t sunken a ship since before we were born.  And still Humans come after us.”  Marisa counters with,  “That’s because no one has told them we’ve changed.”  Marzel doubts they would listen.  “Maybe the princess would.  You saw what she did.”  Marzel disagrees.  He shakes his head when he sees an all too familiar look in his Hermana’s eyes.  “I hate that look!”  Marisa ignores him.  “We can tell her, then she can spread the word to the rest of the Humans.”  Their friend tells her to keep dreaming.  Marzel reminds him that’s what Marisa does best.  Marisa declares she’s going to talk to their father.  Marzel tells her she’s wasting her time while watching her swim off.

And that’s where I leave everyone off for now!  Part 2 is coming in a few days!  Feel free to leave comments or send me asks!

[danisnotofire]

Squip Squad at hogwarts. Jere is slytherin (ambitious, wants to be more chill ;))) Michael is literally the textbook definition of hufflepuff (loyal to a fault, even when jere is maybe not the most considerate dude) Squip is a slytherin (stereotypical "bad guy is a slytherin" but I like the idea of the squip being an older kid that Jeremy looks up to, and the Squip showing Jeremy some dark magic that maybe He Shouldn't Be Doing. And jere just goes along with it bc "hes so cool, Michael") -🌳 1/?

okay. i have,,,, so much to say about this. here’s everything i have on the Hogwarts!BMC au (and i have,,,, a lot) (all of this @adrienagrestte and i worked on together so also please go check out her fic on ao3 that is solely about a hogwarts au) 

(i’m a gryffindor lmao and my patronus is a capuchin monkey) (i’m aware what joe tracz has said about everyone being in hufflepuff but LMAO that’s wrong so here’s an essay on this au) (i also disagree with u on some of ur house choices, but I HAVE REASONING SO HEAR ME OUT!!!)

FIRST OFF, THEIR HOUSES, separated by house: 

slytherin:

jeremy.

 this is easy because jeremy values his morals above all else and will do anything to achieve his goals (i.e, taking the squip, hurting his friend, this is clear i dont think anyone will fight me no this)

chloe 

this is also easy

jenna 

she does what she’s gotta do. i know you said she has a thirst for knowledge, but i don’t think that was her reasoning behind the gossip?? i think she liked having that power over people. i think she enjoyed making people care about her. did you see her down that squip without any questions?? c’mon son

gryffindor

michael 

I KNOW, I KNOW, CONTROVERSIAL- BUT THINK ABOUT IT. HE HOLDS HIS FRIENDS IN SUCH HIGH ESTEEM BUT IS NOT AFRAID TO CALL THEM OUT ON THEIR BULLSHIT. and i know you say he’s loyal, but remember, michael was deadass burning the shit jeremy had given him over the years. michael was just as ready to throw in the towel and accept the bitter end. it was mr heere who convinced him to get over himself.

he also saves the day in the end, (not because hufflepuffs can’t, but because gyrffindors value courage and bravery. there is nothing more brave than 1) staying true to who you are in the face of adversity (ie, the constant bullying) and 2) going out of your way to save the day even for someone who doesn’t necessarily deserve it (ie, jeremy after what he did to michael). so, gryffindor michael. hufflepuff michael is amazing too. but. gryffindor michael.). 

HOWEVER. i hc that everyone always thinks michael would be a hufflepuff. you know how everyone thinks neville should’ve been a hufflepuff?? kinda like that. michael isnt a hufflepuff though, just a gryffindor who has discovered pot. 

also…. slytherin/gryffindor best friendship??? sign me tf up

jake 

he does everything all the time. he does his very best to make sure everybody sees him as the golden boy with no problems. (except my son,,,, definitely has his problems) 

ravenclaw

christine

“jeremy…. having someone make your choices FOR you?? that sounds TERRIBLE” 

her reaction to having the squip make her into her dreams is like “what’s wrong me now??” which is very rational and in tune with herself. i think christine also adores the idea of POSSIBILITY and LEARNING and exploring all these different paths and that’s very ravenclaw. curiosity and creativity. 

hufflepuff

rich

“the ladies are gonna love the REAL richard goranski” just like. c’mon. he apologized for hurting jeremy while under the squip.

brooke

“I mean, I was never into him because he was like, super old and kinda mean to women, but I know you liked him, so” 

“you’re so much better off without madeleine, jeremy” 

“i like gay people!” 

PATRONUSES (patroni?) 

jeremy’s is a hummingbird. small and beautiful and delicate, but also pretty badass and unique (the only bird to hover?? definitely jeremy. also?? they are so fast. jeremy is so anxious. you know that bird moves as fast as jeremy’s brain works) 

christine: dolphin

michael’s patronus is a badger. this further plays into the “everybody thinks michael is a hufflepuff” hc. michael thinks it’s fucking hilarious. 

rich’s patronus is a groundhog. 

jake: koala

brooke: a white rabbit 

chloe: a canadian goose. at first, people make fun of her for it, and she just raises and eyebrow and drags a finger down her wand and is like “are you making fun of my goose?” and the person freezes and is like “n-no no.” and she smirks and is like “good. i wouldn’t want to say anything about your non-corporeal mess you call a patronus.”

jenna: seahorse. 

HOW IT ALL GOES DOWN

michael and christine are both animaguses (animagi??). michael’s animagus is a big fluffy dog. christine’s is a stoat. this isn’t really relevant to the plot lol but i love the idea of them being animagi together. 

mr heere is a muggle, but he supports jeremy as a wizard the best he can. he just doesn’t really understand it. jeremy feels kind of awkward and isolated from his dad bc of it. he lives in the suburbs, so he never really knew anybody magical.

this also plays into jeremy’s insecurity and anxiety. he doesn’t feel accepted by either community and struggles really really deeply with it

michael grew up in a city. his mom is super into the magic community, so michael went to a muggle school but had been growing up around magic. his mom and her friends would always teach him tiny spells, so by the time he gets his letter he knows a thing or two about a thing or two.

he and jeremy meet briefly while jeremy is buying school supplies. his dad has no idea what’s up, so jeremy’s mostly on his own to buy his books and things. michael runs into him on the street while jeremy is looking terrified, and he drags him to his favorite food place and splits a snack with him. michael’s mom eventually finds them, and after jeremy explains his situation she takes him and his dad and leads them around, helping them figure things out. 

michael’s chattering all the way, because he’s really met anyone like jeremy before. “i’ve got a lot of muggle friends, you know, and your culture isn’t exactly a walk in the park to figure out. i was no better when i first moved to the city. honestly. self-checkouts?? coinstar machines?? those are a whole different kind of magic.” 

they meet for real on the train to hogwarts. jeremy is looking lost again, so michael latches onto him bc he’s lonely and he misses his mom and jeremy is Familiar and Nice. jeremy buys candy. michael shows jeremy the bits of magic he’s picked up over the years. 

michael’s heard about hogwarts from his mom, from his aunts and uncles and his mom’s friends. but jeremy…. whoo boy. jeremy gets off the train and stands slack-jawed. it’s beautiful. it’s magic. his whole body sings, and for the first time he feels like he maybe sort of belongs to something.

michael takes like, twenty minutes to sort. everyone is staring at him. he is fuckin SWEATING. the hat CANNOT decide between hufflepuff or gryffindor. michael spends ten minutes arguing at it for taking so long in his head, so his stubbornness and forced indifference but simultaneous constant questioning is what ultimately lands him in gryffindor. 

jeremy and michael wear each other’s clothes all. the. time. they’re always getting point deductions bc one of them accidentally wears the wrong tie or something. this happens even before they start dating. it actually takes people a little while to figure out they’ve started dating bc they already always look like two fucking messes wearing each others clothes, and they already spend as much time together as possible. 

michael is one of the first people to stop eating with his house. of course, this is probably a year or two into hogwarts, after he’s better friends with jeremy, but he’s still pretty young. it kinda hits him one day, that jeremy’s the only one he really wants to be eating with. so he takes his plate and walks across the hall and plops himself at the slytherin table. 

jeremy’s like “what are you doing here you’re gonna get in trouble??” michael just takes bite of his sandwich and shrugs and is like “there’s no rule against eating without your table, jeremy.” 

people make fun of him for this move, though. but he doesn’t get up. jeremy really really likes the fact that michael chooses to sit with him even though it kinda socially ostracizes him, but he’ll never say how much it means to him. he just scoots a little closer, laughs a little louder. 

michael’s not really the best wizard school-wise, but he tries really hard. obviously he passes and all, but he doesn’t really think he’ll ever be great or anything. he’s made his peace with this. jeremy has a similar skill-level, but he’s never really content with it.

because they can’t really hang out in each other’s common rooms, they find other places to chill. curled up in the massive stone windowsills. studying in corners of the library. laying out on the great lawn. empty classrooms. study rooms. the back booths in various places at hogsmeade. it’s actually how they stumble upon the room of requirement. 

these hidden places sure do come in handy later, when they do start dating (wink wink) 

as much as i love older student slytherin squip, (because, god. an older, cooler, better student finally noticing jeremy and promising to help him get everything he’s ever wanted? also, a physical form for michael to punch after this is all over? sign me UP). 

but also, I SEE YOU SQUIP!SLYTHERIN AND RAISE YOU- TOM RIDDLE’S DIARY SQUIP. THINK ABOUT IT: jeremy finds this thing that seems to help him and he accepts it eagerly. (i’m also gonna toss in some elements of the half-blood prince into this lol) 

jeremy shows it to michael, and he’s super excited. “look! it talks back!! it has a name, it’s called the squip!” “it can finally teach me how to be a good and cool wizard, michael!” 

maybe some smaller part of him whispers... it’ll show me how to be someone. someone people care about, instead of split between so many different things. 

it’s cool at first. but once the whole idea of ‘WHOA AN INANIMATE OBJECT WITH SENTIENCE’ wears off, michael is unsure. he’s more in tune with how his magic feels when its exposed to different things, and he doesn’t like the way the diary feels when he writes in it. something about it’s slick and slimy response feels wrong. he tells jeremy this, but jeremy shrugs him off. “if it was wrong, why would it be at hogwarts?”

except then slowly starts showing him things. asking him to do things that he wouldn’t normally do. but…. it’s helped him before. why would it hurt him?? magic can’t be evil, right? 

but jeremy is stubborn, and the diary’s telling him that michael’s just jealous. jealous that even though he grew up with magic he’s never been very good at it, school-wise. jealous that jeremy’s finally becoming something more. 

jeremy listens reluctantly, but it eventually works his way under his skin. and so he stops entertaining what michael’s saying, starts blowing him off. until they’re in the dining hall one day. 

michael’s being slightly more enthusiastic about the squip today. a little louder. people are staring, giving them strange looks. jeremy’s burning with embarassment, but michael just keeps getting more animated. 

finally, he snaps. jeremy rockets up, his knuckles white as he grips the diary. “shut up,” he hisses. 

michael falls silent. “dude, what?”

“you’re wrong,” jeremy insists, packing up his stuff to leave. more people are staring now, he can feel their eyes on his skin. “you’re just jealous. because i can finally be something i’ve always wanted, and you don’t even know what you want at all.”  

“what?” michael says, incredulous, ignoring the way his mind whispers i want you. “jeremy, that’s not true! this thing is evil. you have to get rid of it before you get hurt.”

jeremy sneers. “see? you won’t shut up about it because you wish you had it. guess what! you don’t.”

jeremy gets up and pushes out of the dining hall. 

michael scrambles after him, but it’s too late. jeremy’s gone. 

the diary starts teaches him things. illegal incantations that jeremy’s only ever heard in his history of magic classes. spells with vague descriptions (“to be used on enemies”). darker magic. magic that makes jeremy uncomfortable but he does it anyway, because he’s already made his choice. 

the worst part is that jeremy gets better at magic. he can conjure a full patronus before anybody else in his grade can even get the fake wispy smoke. for the first time, jeremy is good at something. actually, he’s better than good- he’s the best. he’s cool. 

meanwhile, michael’s left behind to watch. and no matter how hard he tries, he can’t get jeremy away from that diary. it’s like he can’t even see him, anymore. 

cue michael moping until christine comes along and asks him what’s going on with jeremy. now, all of michael’s/jeremy’s “study spots” are being put to another use entirely, that is, How To Defeat A Sentient Book That Is Also The World’s Evilest Asshole. 

and thus ensues Michael and Christine working together in order to save jeremy, who’s being used by the squip to doing something very dangerous and horrifyingly awful. maybe cue their animagi being used in some crazy way.

(god you could really get as angsty or as action-y as you wanted. would jeremy use any of those evil spells? if so, on who?? would the squip convince him to use sectumsempra on michael, only to have rich or someone come in and save him because maybe rich went through the same thing? or would it be more banter-y? newfound friends christine and michael trying to save someone they both care about? sneaking through hogwarts grounds in their animagus forms? chloe and jake being the ghosts in the hogsmeade shed because that’s where they would sneak off to hook up and everyone just heard them? SO MANY OPTIONS, TREENON!!!)

cue the basilisk fang and jeremy passing out on top of michael, and cue reunion scene in the hospital wing. 

i dont wanna actually write the fic, but lol would u look at that, i basically did anyway. 

ANYWAY YES I LOVE AND SUPPORT A BMC HOGWARTS AU!!!!! PLS TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS!!! 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #45

“i want blood, guts, and chocolate cake.”

how many keys are on your key chain? what do they go to? two; one goes to each lock in my house. have you ever taken a pregnancy test? nah. what is something that always makes you feel pretty? eye liner. does the thought of moving out from home scare you? yeah... i'm totally ill-prepared for life on my own. have you taken anyone’s virginity? no. on average, how many pizza slices do you eat in one sitting? four, 'cuz i'm a fatass. have you ever gotten a matching piercing or tattoo with someone? yes, "ohana" tat with my best friend. ever made out in a pool? not sure actually. own bright colored underwear? no. do you have a leather jacket? no, but i've wanted one for years. :( do you have weak upper body strength? yes. what movie did you last watch with someone? the new "tarzan" do you think people are intimidated by you? hell no. do you often take painkillers? no. do you wish you were in a relationship? fuckin' tired of being alone. do you ever feel guilty eating meat?  not really. what are you listening to at the moment? "think twice" by eve 6 have you fallen asleep in school? nope have you ever been hospitalized?  yeah do you eat when you’re upset? YEP what sort of music were you brought up on?  classic metal and rock is it hard to make you laugh? very. nothing's funny when you're a depressed fuck. is there a member of the opposite gender on your mind? fucking always what would you do if your ex called you? answer in a damn heartbeat while fangirling on the inside and probably having an anxiety attack is there anyone you hate? merely "hate" is too weak what is your background on your phone? lock screen is the bogeyman from "silent hill: downpour," but the artwork is from anne's comic. my home screen is pyramid head from white hunter have you ever taken a nap with a member of the opposite sex? i miss our naps... is there anything that you and your friends simply can’t agree on? sure. think about your ex, your crush, or the person you’re currently dating. were you attracted to that person as soon as you met them, or did the attraction develop over time? i thought he was a bit weird-looking but handsome at the same time??? it's weird. as far as personality goes, wow. i liked him so quickly. which do you use the most, smiley faces, kisses or hearts? smilies what’s the last thing you said to the last person you kissed? via writing, "because i promised." via actual words, i don't recall. would you feel okay about going to your parents for advice about sex and contraception? mom, totally. dad, no. has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you didn’t say it back? yup. no regrets though, 'cuz if i don't love you, i don't love you. what did you do on your latest birthday? went to texas steakhouse with family and friends favorite dog breed? beagles, shiba inus, chow-chows... what is your favorite not-so-famous band/artist? otep have you ever had any teeth pulled? no have you ever seen two movies at the theater in a row?  no do you own a nightgown?  no have you ever actually been stuffed into a locker?  no. thought that was going to be a much bigger problem as a kid. how many teenagers do you know who have babies?  too many to count. do you get your surveys from your subscriptions page or do you actually go to specific sites and search for them?  i get most of them from fellow survey-takers on tumblr. do you want to get pregnant right now?  omg how funny, i actually had a dream i was in labor with a baby girl last night. jason was the dad somehow. but anyway, no, i do not. have you ever housed a friend for a long period of time because they had no place to live?  nope. if you have younger siblings, are you very protective of them?  hurt her and i swear to christ you die. if you have older siblings, are they very protective of you? i mean, i guess she somewhat is? like she worries about me, so does that count? have you ever wanted to be in a band?  ha ha yup. the song you’re listening to right now?  "teen idle" by marina and the diamonds have you ever had a concussion?  ugh, yeah. have you seen the movie the dark knight?  yeah. joker made me love it. can't even watch it anymore tho... ptsd trigger. guys with six packs, yes or no?  sure? cool if you have one, cool if you don't. do you know anyone who has a pet gecko? yep. would you ever go bear hunting? no, nor would i go hunting in general. describe one of your most emotional farewells. he just... fucking left. we were talking on facebook; he was hanging out with dillon, talking about our relationship, then he said he wanted to end it because he couldn't handle me anymore. i can't remember what i said, but i guess it was cryptic or dangerous enough for him to wind up at my door, because i'd charged into the kitchen to slit my throat, but i ended up on the couch sobbing to my mom. i just screamed at him when he got here, shrieked through tears. he said we could still be friends. liar. then he left. still hasn't come back. how have your tastebuds changed since you were a child? uhhh. i liked peas as a kid. can't stand them now. did you find it difficult to learn how to drive? if you do not know how to drive, would you ever like to learn? yes, it's hard, imo. mostly due to my anxiety, though, i over-exaggerate every driving situation that presents itself to me. do you own plants? if so, what kind of plants? if not, would you like to grow any? not anymore, and no, because i'm too fucking depressed to take care of them. when was the last time you felt at peace? i'm pretty sure the answer's never. what’s one thing that's heavily weighing on your mind? just one? psh. are you self conscious? holy fuck yeah. but then again, no? and by that i mean, like, i barely put any effort into my appearance. for example, i only get dressed in actual clothes if i have to go somewhere and i like NEVER wear makeup. yet simultaneously, i care very much what people think about me, particularly when it comes down to my weight. do you think of others before yourself? it depends on the situation, really. i have to start thinking of myself sometimes. what are your plans for your next birthday? eat out for dinner with friends and family, maybe get tipsy enough to not care about life, get a tattoo. are you friends with your neighbors? nope. what’s your favorite planet? saturn! do you sing in the shower? no what's your favorite disney movie?  tlk what do you do when you can't sleep?  get back on the laptop, usually... do you know anyone who is blind? in one eye, yes. do you have a good singing voice? nope do you ever listen to music in languages besides english? german, yes. when you're sad do you prefer sad music or happy music? SAD. happy music will make me angry. do you have a favorite type of bird? owls did you have a webkinz when you were younger?  FUCK YEAH I DID would you rather go to japan or greece? wow that's hard. uhhhh... greece? why is the world still existing?   god doesn't want it to end yet? did america really put a man on the moon?   i think so. are there any television shows you’re looking forward to in the next few months?  no, i don't watch tv. when it’s time to dress up for a special occasion, are you more likely to wear a dress, a skirt, or dress pants?   dress, i guess. what band/celebrity/etc do you know the most information about? who would you like to learn more about?   i know a bit too much about ozzy osbourne lmao the last news you got that shocked you, what was it, and was it good news or bad news?   bad. if you have pets, who normally puts food and water in their dish?  depends on the pet have you ever taken a "break" of any sort in a relationship?   no, i don't believe in taking breaks. do you organize the pictures on your computer into different folders or are they all just under "my pictures"?   in my old laptop, they were organized.  new one, nah, 'cuz i don't have many pictures. do you think if someone is in a relationship, that it is acceptable to have sleepovers with other people of their preferred sex?   sure, so long they're not doing sexual things. do you feel uncomfortable sharing things like artwork or poetry you've written? Is it because you don't think it's good enough to show off or because it's too personal?  FUCKING YES BC IT'S PERSONAL have you ever played a drinking game? which ones?   i have not. do you like word or picture tattoos better?   pictures, generally. have you ever tasted goat’s milk?   no. have you cried in the past week?   yeah do you think you could handle having an autistic or mentally disabled child?   i sure would hope so. if you were given the chance to go scuba diving, would you?   hell yeah! have you ever seen a live seahorse?   yep. what color did you first ever dye your hair?  i got purple highlights sour skittles or regular?   sour when did you last visit a tattoo parlor? what were you in there for? do you often go into tattoo parlors?  some months ago when i had to photograph a person who works with their hands doing their work.  it was cool.  i don't go to tat parlors often, though.  i wish! in the past year, have you lost weight or gained weight? how much?   don't wanna go into how much i gained... is there a specific time you eat lunch every day, or is it always different?   i eat at exactly 12 PM