All the people who actually do research on seizures and what to do if someone is having a seizure before putting it in their mh fanfics are going to heaven btw. Just because I said so.
grace is still in the shuttered palace but twitch just got to the point in bag a legend where you can run into the palace and punch people to raise suspicion
i like to think they've crossed paths and grace is trying really hard to avoid them bc his scandal is high enough as it is. please stop asking him the fastest way to get arrested
FRIDAY'S FEATURE STREAM: monkey balls to the walls, almost literally – i'm playing through some custom levels that my brother and i made over 15 years ago for an obscure Wii marble roller called Marble Saga: Kororinpa. my wrist hurts just thinking about it
this unassuming looking marble game features not only a full 3D level editor, but even the ability to roll up walls by tilting the Wii remote sideways. you bet your ass we abused the hell out of this mechanic in our levels… and every other mechanic in the game too.
7PM Central tomorrow @ https://twitch.tv/skysometric
I really appreciated the video Julien Solomita posted recently (an edited part of one of his Twitch streams) where he talked about online creators leaving the public eye. Specifically these bits really struck me:
"I think it's hard for some people to imagine what a person goes through with years kind of compounded of doing something like that in such a public way. You see a little bit of it, right? Like you see videos, and you see posts, and you see some appearances and it's the tip of the iceberg, but not only are you not seeing the other things that happen that make that machine run and that make it all possible, but...you also aren't experiencing the toll that someone has to pay."
"There's always a cost... I think what people are starting to realize when they see creators leave is what that cost looks like. For different people it is a different cost...but there's like...an overarching similarity with that cost. There's like a common denominator, which is like it's kind of part of your soul. You're kind of giving a part of yourself to make yourself available in content for the world, and after doing that for a long time it can sometimes, I think, feel like you've forgotten what it feels like to just be a person."
It reminded me of a lot of things currently on my mind, including the post John Green made a while ago about what he gained and what he lost as a successful author and YouTuber.
More and more I feel like the creative people I admire most all end up feeling this way, and it has me so conflicted and stuck.
I used to think what would ultimately hold me back creatively would be fears that I'm not good enough, or that no one would care what I have to say or share, but that's not it. I mean, those are worries, sure, but they aren't enough to stop me.
No, what stops me is wondering if I am good enough. If people would care about what I say or share. Because then I would have to pay that toll. Something equal to what I gained would be taken from me, and I would never be able to undo it.
I would never stop being The Person Who Did That. I will have no choice but to live with all positives and negatives that unfurl as a result. I would have to continue to do it to maintain the income and the success.
Parts of me would not be mine anymore, and what happens to them out in the world would be out of my control forever after. There's something much more terrifying and haunting in that potential outcome.
I just still deeply do not know how to reconcile the desire to make a creative, meaningful impact on the world, and the desire to protect what matters to me.
It doesn't feel like these should be the only two options. I wish there were more.
It's Marbles Tournament Night! Join me on twitch at 8pm est for fun, chaos and voice changing shenanigans! Who will become the champion!? Tune in and find out!