#marauders as things my friends have said

[florence-not-italy]

random pictures (taken by me) or screenshots i found saved in my media roll that i think align with the marauders!

☆ james

he would def go out in random outfits and be shameless about it too 😭

☆ sirius

sirius 100% gifted harry inappropriate toys or made them do stuff like this and make innocent animals fight to the death

☆ remus

welsh remus is literally the best hc for him. i bet him and james would mess stuff up when drunk like this and steal a traffic cone off the street.

☆ peter

(they say money don't grow on trees but i got rich off weed)

idk i just think this is the sort of "inspirational quote" that peter would write in the margins of his books lol

☆ marlene

marls and her... odd crushes against the world (minnie and effie) 💪

☆ lily

"lily evans would be a swiftie!" I scream as people throw rocks at me (i will not be taking arguments at this time)

☆ mary

uhhh yeah. do i need to explain? i think she'd have fun terrorising lily with twisted muggle stories if it was modern day.

☆ barty

first things first.. second hand only fans merch... i reckon barty would take a screenshot of this and send it to evan whilst LAUGHING his head off

☆ regulus

he's such a sour pickle :( but it's alright that's why we love him

☆ evan

evan is the sanest person in slytherin, between regulus' depression and pessimism, and barty's batshit craziness, he really needs to smile thru the pain hahah

[genderflouiid]

marauders as things my friends have said

barty: do you think that i’m a sunrise or a sunset?

regulus: i think that you’re a bitch

[muggleborn-slytherpuff]

Marauders Era as stuff my friends & I said

*After The Prank*

Remus: Don't worry, I won't get back with my ex

Lily: You better not!

*Literally a few hours later*

Marlene: Do you want to tell Lily what you did?

Remus: ...

Remus, looking at the ground in shame: I got back with my ex...

[that-bitch-kat3]

sirius: i cant shag remus! itd be like shagging james!

marlene: so saying that you cant shag remus because it’d be like shaggings someone else in your incestuous polycule of a friend group doesn’t actually help your case

[accio-sriracha]

Sirius: *pins a parchment to the wall that says "signups for Remus' Hate Club"*

Everyone: ????

Remus: *exasperated* Oh for fuck's sake Sirius, WE LITERALLY CAN'T!

James: *walking into the room* What's going on?

Sirius: REMUS SAID HE WON'T HAVE A CHILD WITH ME!

Remus: WE'RE GAY!

Sirius: BUT WE'RE WIZARDS!

Remus: BUT WE'RE LITERALLY SEVENTEEN???

Peter:

Lily:

James:

Sirius: FUCK YOU. YOU DON'T EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE.

Remus: *facepalms*

[marauders-quotes-bymyfriends]

The emeralds casually chatting about something incredibly unhinged

my friends had this conversation at lunch and I just-

Dorcas: *pretending to hold out a microphone* so do you take the 16 STDs or double it and give it to the next person?

Pandora: I take the 16 STDs!

Evan: nooo, I wanted 32 STDs....

Barty: *waggling his eyebrows suggestively* I'll give you 32 STDs-

Regulus: *hits barty over the head with his school bag*

[ttroubledwaters]

marauders as things my friends and I have said pt 1

all parts

barty: what if I stuck it in your ear

evan: kinky?

regulus: no, emergency room

Remus: you're a switch?

Sirius: yeah?

James: AND you're bisexual?

Sirius: yes..?

Remus: AND you use all pronouns?

Sirius: uh-huh.....?

Peter: so were you just born indecisive as fuck?

Pandora: regulus is going through some things with his family, he needs space

Barty: aren't we all? fuck his space

Sirius: I FOUND MY TOP!

James: is it Remus... Is Remus the top...

rando: what's masochist?

Barty: finding pleasure in pain inflicted by your partner when intimate.

Evan: id let Barty stab me during sex.

Remus: YOU TOLD ME TO FUCK YOU SO I DID. YOURE FUCKED

Peter: just lost my virginity

James: oh...

Sirius: HUH

Peter: I'm jp I just needed y'all to answer

Sirius: *sends a screenshot of $$ balance*

Remus: want some head?

Barty: he's just listening to whimper audios again

Evan: I'm actually sobbing why is it so creamy

Evan: ugh y'all distracted me I was supposed to be reading

Regulus: YOU WERE LISTENING TO ASMR??

Barty: no need, I like it raw

Pandora: hey kids! This is a perfect example of unsafe sex! Now let's go through unplanned parenthood!

James: Regulus this was YOUR fault

Regulus: shut up I'll fuck you again

[turnin9pag3]

Marauders as things me and my friends have said:

Part 50

James: *whispers* lily…

Lily: yeah?

James: i just wanted to see if you were still in here because im scaredd😣😣

Lily: why are you always scared 😭

James: because its scary out here man the real world is scary

Lily: you arnt in the real world youre in your bedroom with a pink princess lamp watching bojack horseman

James: AND ITS SCARY

[justasinglegaygirl]

Marauders as thing my frinds said pt.2

Sirius:*is sitting on james's lap* i can't believe people ship us. I mean we're clearly brothers.

James: *is feeding sirius from his plate* yeah pads. Like we're just best mates.

Peter & remus: um should we tell them or...

[regulus-smith]

The Marauders era as conversations I've had with my friends

Barty: *sends tiktok that has Blood//Water playing in the background*

Evan: WELL NEVER GET FREE

Evan: LAND TO THE SLAUGHTER

Marlene: that song is ass

Evan: GOOD!

Marlene: and it's lamb, not land.

Evan: what.

Marlene: yep

Evan: how.

Evan: I've been lied to.

[hotdamnitsmoony]

the marauders as conversations i’ve had with my friends pt7

sirius: anyone wanna go stand out in that little play park and look creepy?

remus: yeah, alright

james: nah, it’s kinda cold

peter: yeah, we’ll stay here

sirius: ok! *grabs remus by the wrist and drags him outside*

james: they’re totally gonna shag

peter: in a children’s play park?

james: you think that matters to them?

[florence-not-italy]

(playing scrabble)

remus: that's not word! james, tell him!

sirius: what, twatbag? absolutely a word

remus: james!!

james, *backing away slowly* : i want to be excluded from this narrative

remus: sirius, you have to play another word. that doesn't count.

sirius: well i'm sorry mr dEoXyRiBonUclEiC aCiD, we can't all be like you! so leave me and twatbag alone.

remus: *sighs*

[genderflouiid]

marauders as things my friends have said

james: what’s your red flag?

regulus: um, i don’t kno—

james: i think you’re mean

[your-neighbourhood-antisocial]

Marauders as shit my friends have said

James : it is near Paris, in France

Remus : and where exactly did you think Paris was?

James : *whisper* in France?

Remus : ofc we knew it, idiot. You didn't have to specify the country

Sirius : he was js trying to help!

[that-bitch-kat3]

james after walking in on remus and sirius right after they got together: that took years off of my life

sirius still salty because james HAD THE FUCKING MAP: not enough of them

[accio-sriracha]

Sirius: *staying up to work on something*

Coffee Pot: *starts rumbling*

Sirius: For fuck's sake, Remus, it's ONE IN THE MORNING.

Remus: *shaking, already filled with caffiene* Don't judge me.

Sirius: ....