#mandrill-based

[lines-and-lies]

Canta !

[mechawolfie]

trying to figure out orrin's colors

[directdogman]

PLEASE I NEED TO KNOW how did you come up with Roger's desktop??? Like... it's just... THERES SO MUCH ON IT LMAO I remember seeing it for the first time and being so flabbergasted.. truly emitted Roger energy though!!

Oh, it's based on my own desktop. For quite a chunk of Roger's route development, I had a mandrill as my own desktop background. it's similarly full to the brim with unnamed folders only i can navigate + strange icons too.

This might give you an idea of what I'm talking about.

[idcallmyselfhuman]

XiaoAether Masterlist 👹⛅

Edit: version 2.0 here

Or, every XiaoAether moment that I can remember (and an attempt to organize them)

Starting this off with the one scene that made us all go "wait a fucking minute" at the very start of the game,

Battle of Osial

Aether's feet were already steadied. Xiao could've let go, or let him fall as gracefully as Mountain Shaper did to that guard (I would've hated him forever) but considering that he insists that being near mortals is such a biiiig no-no, he could have, but he didn't. No, even more, he fucking tightened his hold.

-

Teyvat Food Notes (Sweet Dream, Adeptus' Temptation and Satisfying Salad)

Next! The promotionals during Xiao's release as a playable character. Specifically, Teyvat Food Notes. To celebrate his release, they made an Almond Tofu + Sweet Dream Food blog.

Note: Both google translate and Papago seem to use Mandrill instead of Xiao, so... just know that's who it's talking about.

This is where we learn that Xiao didn't even make "Sweet Dream"; this dish was Aether's thank you gift to him. Xiao's specialty dish is a gift from Aether. I'm- agh. ANYWAY.

We actually also see Sweet Dream in Childe's birthday art. And I'm really sorry to Tartaglia but seeing it stole all his thunder. I could not get over it.

I like to think Aether was so busy making Childe food that he absentmindedly started preparing Almond Tofu in the way he's used to (because of how often Xiao requests it :'> ).

Just when I thought that was it for the Teyvat Food Notes and I could've moved on, I found this in the Adeptus' Temptation food note; the one they made for the first Lantern Rite.

Note: "Fairy/Buddha Jump over the Wall" is apparently an actual Chinese delicacy that the Adeptus' Temptation is based on!

I found this part really cute, especially right now because of the poetry event. Since the beginning, Aether's always known that Xiao was capable of being poetic, it just took them being close and his encouragement for Xiao to actually make a poem.

Lastly, Aether's Satisfying Salad. This isn't connected to the food blog this time (since that one's for Mona), but rather, this and Almond Tofu are the first dishes Aether has ever given Xiao in the game. I included this despite it being pretty minor because in Moonlight Merriment, Smiley Yanxiao actually brings this up again.

Smiley Yanxiao: The boss told me to take care of him, but this guy, let me tell you - he is one tough nut to crack. He usually turns his nose up at everything that isn't Almond Tofu.

Xiao willingly ate something that wasn't Almond Tofu because... because what, it was given to him by a cute blonde traveler? The jury's still out on that one.

-

Lantern Rite 1.3, Baizhu Story Quest

I'm sure we're already familiar with this scene, right?

The very first time Xiao promised Aether that no matter what, as long as he calls his name, he'll be there. Right after that was Moonlight Merriment, where the game literally specifies that Xiao made that promise just for Aether. Way to make your commitment subtle.

Ah, Xiao, you're so easy... Of course, this wouldn't be the last time that Aether calls for him and Xiao arrives immediately. This also happened during Baizhu's story quest to, yet again, the astonishment of everyone around excluding these two. (Xiao's dedication is one of a kind)

Xiao worries over Aether often, despite knowing that they're both formidable in their own right. I also think it's sweet how every time they meet, Xiao's departing words are always a reminder to call for him whenever needed, to the point where there are times that Aether just goes "Yeah, we know." before he can even finish the sentence.

Unfortunately, though, there is one time where Xiao failed to reach Aether when he called him, but only because he physically wasn't able to.

-

Perilous Trail (Interlude)

The only thing that prevented this man from getting to Aether like always was being in a different plane of existence. Romeo and Juliet wish they were this romantic istfg

Aether: Come find us.

Xiao: No.

Yanfei: But Aether's in trouble!

Xiao: How do we meet?

Now where else did someone pull this tactic recently-

...Again, XIAO YOU ARE SO EASY. But anyway, back to the Chasm bc I wasn't quite done with that-

As soon as Yanfei tells Aether that Xiao is awake, Ae comes running. Just full on "stop saying you're fine i'll be the judge of that"

And he looks so angry when Xiao brings up writing a will. augguh they are sooooo- (i would put a reaction pic here if i didn't have an IMAGE LIMIT fuck tumblr bro)

To finish off the Chasm Interlude on a more serious note, this entire conversation was really touching, and I love seeing the progress these two have made over the years. Xiao letting himself open up with Aether's help year by year is one of my favorite things about this game.

-

Teapot and Character Voice Lines + Birthday Letters

For the first and second Lantern Rite, Xiao was still adamant on not even stepping foot in Liyue Harbor, declining every invitation to go there because of how much he disliked being near mortals.

Yet in his teapot voicelines, once you reach a high enough friendship with him, Xiao actually takes the initiative to invite Aether to go to the city, if only to understand him better. Xiao explicitly says that his willingness to go to the harbor was for him.

More About Xiao I: I'm willing to protect you.But don't think about getting close, and stay out of my way, or all that awaits you is regret.

More About Xiao V: It's too late. The connection between us is too strong. Even if you wanted to, it's too late to sever it. Hm? You've never thought to sever it?

About Shenhe: It seems Shenhe places a great deal of trust in you. Well, how could she not. There are few people in the world as kind and good-natured as you.

Shenhe, About Xiao: My first impression of him was that he's not one to smile. After meeting him again more recently, however, he's still as reserved as ever, but… he seems a lot more relaxed now. Maybe he… met someone special.

That line by Shenhe made me happy. Aether's effect on Xiao benefitted not only him, but the people surrounding Xiao as well. We even see that in his birthday letters, where at the most recent one, he follows Ae's advice and goes to spend time with old friends.

They're also all just insanely romantic, I feel like that goes without saying. Every year, I wonder how Genshin would possibly top the one before it that isn't just an explicit confession of undying love.

-

Lantern Rite '23

I'm here to remind you all of a beautiful scene that should never be forgotten for years to come.

Regardless of Genshin trying to be mysterious and making us guess who saved Aether, the fact that they both came rushing over is incredible on its own. They know that Aether isn't a damsel in distress, and Paimon's acting was so on the nose, but they still couldn't allow even the slightest possibility of harm to come to him.

Xiao looking away and talking in circles just to say he really was worried is the funniest fucking thing.

For the Lantern Rite event itself, if you've read this far in, you're probably already familiar. I really wish there wasn't an image limit because I have so many screenshots I want to put in here. If you want a refresher, watch this and start around the 2-hour mark

I wanted to put my own video in the post but you can only put one :/// I'm fist fighting whoever put these limits. 1 video file and 30 images? who are you

BACK TO THE TOPIC

There really isn't much I could say that I haven't already said before. For XiaoAether shippers, this was hoyo spoonfeeding content on a silver spoon. It's Aether and Xiao at their most comfortable with each other, talking and spending time with the people they care about. It's Aether fulfilling his end of the bargain of bailing Xiao out of uncomfortable social situations, because if you haven't noticed throughout all of these examples (or even outside of that), Aether is so perceptive when it comes to the comfort of the people around him.

This was also the event where we find out that for Xiao, the most distinguished guest in his eyes was Aether (Even though Ae thought he was going to say Zhongli..)

I have a lot of love for this event. But since this isn't just a lantern rite post, I'll move on.

-

Waterborne Poetry

The catalyst for this post. The reminder of how lovely this ship is, and how far these two have come.

As we have all learned from Xiangling, Yanfei, Venti and Hu Tao, you only need to mention Aether's name to convince Xiao of whatever it is you're planning. The part where Aether and Team Chongyun were trying to convince him to come with them and touch some fucking grass was really cute.

This event and the previous Lantern Rite also had Aether and Xiao talking privately, only to get interrupted by Paimon/Xiangling (as well as calling them out lmao)

And, of course, the scene that everyone freaked out over,

This. I don't think I'll ever get over this.

The fact that they had Zach voice this- A short, but sweet moment where Aether looks at Xiao from afar and immediately gets inspired, performing a poem where the real meaning is shared only between the two of them...

And Xiao's smile.

An expression that Aether had done so well to bring out.

2023 was the year of XiaoAether. Thank you, Hoyo.

-

Done! I HAVE SO MANY SCREENSHOTS AND I COULDN'T EVEN USE MOST OF THEM ToT. I actually had clips that I edited but Tumblr said no. Good thing there's YouTube.

Another reason as to why I made this was because some shippers said that XiaoAe didn't make sense because it lacked depth and I was so affronted by it that I did all this out of spite (and love for these characters. mostly love.)

[gynandromorph]

god this shit took forever to sketch. another NofNA emulation comic. it reminds me of the midterms in secretary, for obvious reasons, but Legend is sort of an inverse secretary situation, where she is exceptional at fighting, but wants to write.

let me see what i can remember...

PS, the blue-eyed black lemur, has been friends with Legend since their mutual first season at college, as mentioned above her reference sketch... they probably became more friendly after being paired up to peer edit each others' work. PS has since graduated from college and works as a markscraft. Legend frequently commissions PS to scribe for her, not only because they are friends, but because PS is one of the few markscrafts in the area who isn't a rodent. many primates go into law or medicine. mainly Legend commissions notetaking in classes -- she is too insecure to share her stories. PS has a more relaxed, informal personality, and i tried to get that across -- i think it's relevant to why she decided to become a markscraft instead of pursuing more intense study. still, i also tried to get across that they are good friends, not just scribe and customer, particularly with the amount of touching that PS does. the impulse to touch and groom is probably innate for her as a primate. there isn't as much information about her species, but in ring-tailed lemurs, lemurs usually only groom based on the strongest bonds, rather than more communal aggregate grooming as a sort of social currency. i honestly don't know what PS would need to note during finals, but i think Legend just Wanted her there anyway.

the bird, DL, fighting the squirrel, GG, is a grey shrike. i imagine him as an average student in the middle of his education, but i think he is in the class for combat purposes, because pressure point manipulation can be incredibly powerful, more so if from a less expected species like a bird.

mr. deciding is a much more serious, no-nonsense teacher, possibly due to his specialty. when you're teaching students how to explode a kidney with a handshake, you probably just play it safe and try to put the fear of god into them before any kidneys get exploded. i wanted this class to have a much heavier emphasis on safety of the participants than the class in secretary, with a more focused goal than "who can beat the shit out of each other better." i think the goal of fighting to show off knowledge here is still Fucking Insane, but it's just. their culture, i guess. you can technically "move" your pressure points, so being able to defend yourself by utilizing this knowledge can also show off what you've retained. the mouse next to him is a proctor, who is an extra teacher brought in to judge and often write for another teacher, but primarily as a peacekeeper and bouncer. in classes where a student can theoretically totally disable a teacher by just touching them once, the precaution is seen as necessary. the mouse is probably a combat-oriented point invocation instructor.

the mandrill, MK, is a first-season or first-year student -- i assume that one class, from midterms to finals, is a season, as secretary seems to start near autumn. midterms have snow, and finals are during early spring. anyway, that's tangential. i think he's very new to the educational system. i pictured him as a medical student. in his fighting style, i made him more defensive; he doesn't really know nearly as much about attacking an opponent in a fight. he does think at least about his opponent's most immediate reactions, but doesn't have enough experience with fighting to think ahead to the degree that Legend does. you can see him make the same mistake that Legend did against Machinations, which disables his non-dominant hand. needless to say, he will probably always be aware of headbutt proximity now. he attempts to use two factures in the fight within a style meant to evoke debilitating vertigo by manipulating the connection between the occular, vestibular, and proprioceptive systems. it's obvious that he created the style from his medical classes. it is fairly empty as far as styles go. interrupted facture: nystagmus, which causes the world to spin around the opponent by involuntarily twitching the eyes back and forth. second facture: strabismus, which misaligns the pupils, primarily impeding aim. denied by Legend because a honey badger does not rely on vision or a vestibular system as much as a primate does -- not something he really considered when making the style. factures that never ended up being used: pursuit, which forces the target to follow a spinning image of themselves instead of looking where they should; and mask's lasting, which forcibly initiates saccadic masking, suppressing the intake of new visual information altogether.

the large bird is a bateleur. the mouse is just a regular house mouse. the lizard is an ornate sandveld lizard. the opponent of the lizard is a common mole-rat, also called an african mole-rat (even though most species of mole-rats live in africa). the monkey god i'm not super sure but i believe it's just a vervet monkey. the other mouse is also a common house mouse.

GG is a second-year student, which is the last year for a rodent. i think she's been kind of aimless -- she thinks incredibly fast as a squirrel, and finds solving problems in the moment to be a much more successful endeavor than trying to plan ahead. she doesn't worry about the future and doesn't ruminate on the past much. she's aware that she isn't the best ever and doesn't apply herself as much as others, but it also doesn't particularly bother her. kind of ironic, given the aesop she slops onto Legend after the fight. i imagine that she will eventually choose the name Serendipity. i tried to write her lack of foresight, but compensatory quick thinking in both fights. like the shrike, GG is a combat-oriented student. the style she briefly introduces at the beginning is called fanciful flower's delightful blight. it is based on the deadly nightshade flower and its berries -- which are toxic, obviously, and a hallucinogenic. squirrels flick their tails for many reasons, and the most common reason is simply a default flicking to attract predators. their tails are designed to "deglove" easily; if a predator lunges for their tail, which is the moving part of them, the skin and fur will tear off, and the squirrel can escape. delightful blight utilizes the attention-grabbing flicking of the squirrel's tail as a nightshade plant to induce a trance-like state. the berries represent temptations so much more pleasing than what you ought to focus on. a nice berry and a flower to smell are so much nicer than struggling in a fight. even when you resist them, they linger in your mind, and "plant seeds" when the berry falls as self-restraint is worn down over repeated abstinence from the temptation. factures induce hallucinations and nausea. she primarily uses the base rodent style to fight Legend here, but also uses base squirrel style twists, which include more acrobatics, backflipping, and contortions.

the two things that really catch Legend off-guard use limbs that she doesn't have, and most opponents don't have -- elbows long enough to use defensively, and a long, rope-like tail. she is otherwise supposed to be fairly adept at analyzing what an opponent will do, usually a few steps ahead, related to her ability to fabricate narratives quickly. you can see her also come up with a lie for kicking GG fairly quickly... she was going to say the impulse was in her legs because she was trying to move away from GG's strike.

anyway if any part of this fight is like... unfathomable i can probably explain. i've already been typing for way too long, lmfao

[shannonsketches]

but just like...What If, you know??

Geets/Ego is based on a Mandrill, the monkey I personally fear most

Goku/Instinct is based mmmostly on a lemur because I like the idea of him being very long and agile

I kept his legs funky to nod to angelic influence. Also because Lemur feet weird me out! So I made them Worse.

teeny freeza for size reference

[spinnysocks]

TLG Outlanders Jumanji AU that i have suddenly become obsessed with :) buckle up

i'm mainly basing this off of the 2017 movie, with elements of the 2019 one too

wema, tunu, dogo and kijana are playing when they find a hidden cave, they go in and they find lots of weird paintings on the wall and the floor. ever the inquisitive one, dogo steps into a circle in the middle and they all get sucked into... Jumanji?? or maybe in the TLG universe it's called Mchezo

the adults look for them. the leaders (plus kenge and sumu) and the idiots (plus mwoga, nne, tano and neema) go in two groups to search since the kids were missing for a while. the leaders find the hidden cave first as sumu noticed it in his small size. they get sucked in, and eventually the idiots find it after them

they turn into human versions upon entering the world. yeah they're pretty freaked out lmao

the premise is that they go through trials to "prove" themselves, at the risk of their 3 lives, to get to the final task of saving the kiddos. i'm thinking each of them get a task focused on their skills but all of them are at the will of it, aka any of them could lose a life in any trial

i think the Strengths & Weaknesses bit would be funny. kiburi has no weaknesses, he says smth like "I'm too good to be weak 😏" and then 'Pride' pops up hfgdhdh. tamka's weakness would be cake because i think it'd be funny. nduli's is picking up cool rocks. i would say goigoi's would be sleeping but he'd lose all 3 in an instant. the list goes on

reirei is mad because she gets the boring map-reader job lol, despite that she saves everyone's asses so

i imagine sumu is like Milo, he gives them the information in a really deadpan tone lmao. it's like "... Oh no..." "Spit it out, will you?!" "... Mandrills. We should go" and he just continues spilling knowledge while they're running for their lives lmao

you know how in the second movie Bethany/Milo is a horse? yeah nne and tano are straight up just themselves- they're hyenas but realistic, like they didn't change 💀 they're just there doing hyena laughs and absolutely savaging people in the fights

the ostrich scene from the second movie would be funny. maybe the hyenas are the drivers 👀 NONE of them trust their lives with janja, chungu or cheezi but somefuckinghow.. they don't die

in a trial where the leaders are really trapped, guess who sneaks in and saves them? Ushari!!! that was actually all of their reactions as soon as he spoke and they knew it was him. shupavu hugs him on impulse and then gets awkward about it lol, they're happy to see him

ushari explains how he didn't actually die when scar was destroyed but he escaped the volcano and happened across the hidden cave. he's been trapped ever since and obviously presumed dead. he's been stuck with 1 life because he needed the others to complete the rest of the trials :(

there's a dance fight where kiburi has to defeat the guards without being all guns blazing about it. literally the same as the scene with Martha. it's so funny at first bc he doesn't know what the fuck to do - i hc him as demi, he can't flirt with someone he doesn't know😭 - but when a song (prolly rap?) starts playing he beats their asses easy

little did they know the exact same thing was happening on the opposite side of the building, just with the idiots. tamka, nduli and neema also get their cool moment of beating people up, dance fight style! it's mainly tamka because he actually DOES have a strength in acting :)

the leaders and the idiots enter the building at the same time and it's an "Oh Shit!" spiderman pointing meme moment lmao. from this point on they do the trials together

the vultures fly the helicopters. you can imagine how well that goes. it's just like in the movie where something immediately breaks 😭 i think it'd be cool if kenge was the one to fix the helicopter, giving him a hero moment! imagine it

"Kenge, you did it! :D"

"Guess I did"

"Um... Oops"

"What Janja?"

"I dropped the jewel 😶"

"YOU WHAT?!?!"

janja loses a life in that scene from the rhinos 😭 do i wanna traumatise mzingo that much? idk. i just feel like that is such a janja thing to happen. fridge's character is janja-coded lmfao

"YOU PUSHED ME OUT THE HELICOPTER! >:("

that scene where fridge pushes spencer off a cliff? yeah that obviously happens. i'm thinking reirei and janja squabbling. would be funny if janja pushes reirei off impulsively and he just stands there, in shock, waiting to get yelled at when she respawns 😭

there's one of those Step On The Right Pieces trials. kiburi is being all cocky, steps on the wrong one and loses a life- bro gets absolutely humbled lmao. i think the skinks would be good at that trial for some reason

some random trial ideas: a "sleeping lions" type trial for goigoi. a "follow (copy) the leader" trial for mzingo. a food temptation one for the idiots??

jasiri definitely has a trial where she helps someone or shows that the "bad guy" NPCs can be good or somethin. that's probably the last trial before the finale

at the last trial they all work together to save the kiddos! it's really wholesome at the end because they saved the kids, they actually achieved something, they worked together, AND they got ushari back! :)

bonus:

based on the second movie, i was considering a different version of this au where janja purposefully enters the game to prove himself and it's more of a lesson of how it's not just about his strength, but the strength of all of them

janja just thinks he ain't good enough, especially not being leader of his clan anymore, but it's through working together when the others come after him that he realises that ain't true. just an extra thought i had :)

might make a follow up post because i came up with this in an afternoon just for fun 😭

[violetjedisylveon]

Older gay monkeys*

*i know one of them is an ape

Tongbei Yuanhou(left) and Chikao Mahou(right) are the first celestial primates.

They are much older than Wukong and Macaque. And they're just a gay but much healthier about it.

When the pillar of creation first broke, all the chaos that flooded into the realm needed to go somewhere so boom, you got a gibbon made from the waters flooding the realm and a mandrill made from fires. They literally popped into the end of the world and had to deal with that on their first day of existing.

They are much less problematic than their youngers, they're still nuisances, but they aren't nearly as destructive about it. And they have more useful powers.

Mahou did a lot of work in the underworld cause they're powers are basically being socially aware and a good judge of people. And not dying.

Has knowledge of yin and yang, Understands human affairs, Is adept in its daily life And able to avoid death and lengthen its life.

Yuanhou did work in the celestial realm as basically a glorified moving man, he just moved shit around.

Seize the sun and the moon, Shorten a thousand mountains, Distinguish the auspicious from the inauspicious, And manipulate planets and stars

They knew each other before they started their respective jobs because they came into existence the same day and immediately clocked that they're a pair. Somewhere along the line they found themselves in a romantic relationship don't ask them how, neither of them know.

They are on good terms with most people, mostly because they aren't nearly as annoying as their disaster gay youngers, and they like to hang with Buddha cause they don't got much to do that often, their nominal bosses would like to have a word about that but never get their attention long enough.

Buddha sent them to oversee Macaque after his fight with Wukong during the journey, they were basically his parole officers guiding him away from revenge and towards self improvement. Cause they ship the disaster monkeys and need them to talk shit out. It worked and they get a niece out it.

They've been chilling since they let their kids take over their duties, their kids are better at it than they are anyway(cause they actually do it). And now they spend their time hanging with their buds, making Mount Everest taller, and watching their favorite gay monkeys be not disasters and functional for once. (they'll be back to disaster gay status soon enough)

They show up in chapter 13 of Little Star, and I finally got character art done before the chapter they first appear in.

I based Mahou's design on a mandrill even though most of what I've seen is him as a baboon, because mandrills have brighter colored face masks in the references I was looking through. Yuanhou's mask is an upside down five points star because of his whole moving celestial bodies thing.

Yuanhou is also the only one who is not a monkey, he's an ape and therefore the reason why they are celestial primates and not just celestial monkeys.

Cracked Family AU Masterpost

[the-real-jojo]

Slides this guy over to you discreetly,,,,, this is canta he's a Saiyan I based vaguely off of mandrills bc. Like. If I found a "I ❤️ MANDRILLS" T-shirt I would wear it every day bro

tee hee .... hayyyyy hii canta hi !!!!!!!!!!

HERE YOU GOOOOOOOO

[mjrtaurus]

Let’s assume that the Monkey D clan was founded on and well established in Zou in the 200 years before the Void Century. There were a lot of different simian (monkeys and apes both) species represented in the Monkey D clan, and if the genetics is anything as wild as the Fish-men’s are, the current Monkey D men could have their few mink traits come from different simian species.

Again, we’re basing this off of Fish-men genetics, so this is a scientific garbage fire.

Garp is a Gorilla Mink. He’s big. He’s burly. He’s top heavy. He’s fuzzy. He’s a roughhousing machine. Tough guy posturing will get you thrown into the next Blue because them’s fightn’ words.

Dragon is a Mandrill Mink. Teeth. Big fucking teeth. Sharp, too. He has the patience of a monk, but if you somehow manage to piss him off (why would you do that), he’ll show them to you.

Luffy is a Spider Monkey Mink. Kid was climbing about the same time he started walking. Has sharper than average canines and will bare them if given good reason to. Obnoxiously loud, especially with friends around.

[captmickey]

Escape from Monkey Island: ReWrite a.k.a Mickey's MI4A

Soooo yeah, it's not exactly a secret that I very strongly dislike Escape From Monkey Island as part of the series as a whole.

From the overabundance reliance of pop culture reference and perpetually beating the players over the head of "DO YOU GET IT? DO YOU GET THE REFERENCE TO THE PREVIOUS GAMES?!", the ever so infamous Random Number Generator also known as Monkey Kombat, to the absolute out of characterization of Guybrush, Elaine, and LeChuck....

I'm not a big fan of MI4. In fact, I kinda hate it. It doesn't mean it's ENTIRELY flawed, there are some good aspects to it, but it's too far buried and ignored for the more glaring negative aspects.

So of course, being a totally rational fan that I am - I thought of a rewrite. One that I went back and forth with with friends and kinda went about thinking of "what I would change/fix".

I not only doodled a few ideas, but I initially started a fanfic rewrite, but I don't have the time/energy to do it. At least, not right now.

So I'm gonna post a beat by beat of what I would change because dammit, brain is finally back and while I have that steam I'm going to use it.

Here we go!

Starting strong: The Plot... You Know, That Thing.

Gonna start with saying that in this hypothetical rewrite, I'd go ahead and keep the main plot of an evil land developer buying out the Caribbean for his own selfish gains and having Elaine try to reclaim her title as Governor, but with the aforementioned changes as said above.

So the plot would look like this:

Ozzie, being the greedy corporate monster that he is, is in the process of buying out the Caribbean in favor of making it more profitable and safe, removing all things about what makes piracy grand in the world of MI. Instead of using some stupid "Insult [Insert Game Here]", he would use the Ultimate Insult in a weaken state, and "purchase" the land to the confusion of other pirates.

Basically bring about this air of mystery of how could someone as strong as Smirk or something hand over their business prior to realizing it's the Ultimate Insult.

(I dare ya'll to look me in the eye and try to say "Yes, Smirk who went on record to say he fought guards in Port Royal alongside Carla would hand over the deed to his business because of a game of Insult Gin Runny" convincingly without second guessing. Go on. I dare you.)

Guybrush and Elaine, who had recently came back from their Honeymoon, gets the notice that Elaine was "dead at sea" (and it was a declaration from one Ozzie Mandrill because he's an evil corporate man who has funds and can easily bribe a lawyer to write such declaration). Realizing that Melee is, essentially, under a timer of sorts before it gets completely destroyed in favor of Ozzie's image, the two work together to try and stop what's happening: Elaine reclaiming Melee and Guybrush figuring out how Ozzie is able to grab so much land so quickly.

Along the way, Guybrush and Elaine are able to rally the pirates together because there is strength in numbers, but it's inevitably Guybrush that does final strike on Ozzie.... and not with giant statues or giant monkey robots but I'll get to that in just a bit.

Next on the rewriting block: The Villain in this New Rewrite.

I would go ahead and remove LeChuck entirely as the villain in favor of really focusing on Ozzie as the Lead Villain.

Blasphemous, I know, but hear me out.

In the Mysteries of Monkey Island, because yes I'm gonna pull references shut up, the director of the game initially wrote the plot of EMI based on how he was feeling with Lucasart's shift from being a studio of ingenuity and creativity to just hashing out endless Star Wars titles because it was easy to commercialized.

Which, with Ozzie's plan in the base game of taking over the Caribbean in favor of commercialized eased and removing any and all originality and essentially being expy of sorts to both Lucasarts and George Lucas, it makes a lot of sense... everything else, however, does not.

So instead of Ozzie taking over the Caribbean and helping LeChuck steal Elaine by making her submissive because he owes him a solid, I'd keep the land-development plot, because I would rather Ozzie be THE focus, and to really put forth that underlying message of feeling angry at the shift of the company.

Have it be Guybrush unifying other pirates against Ozzie, too to show that he is getting more and more confident in his skills as a pirate because we're four games in and while he does occasionally bumble, he is a lot more confident in himself... especially so by Tales. But I'll get more to how Guybrush kicks butt later down, for now it's just focusing on why I want it to be Ozzie and Ozzie only.

The Ultimate Insult can still be in play to add to the risk, but we really and truly don't need LeChuck for that. If anything, he can be an acknowledgement of how Ozzie even first heard of the Ultimate Insult from legends of how the Evil Ghost Pirate LeChuck once searched for it but failed or something.

....I just really don't want LeChuck in because having him in feels horribly shoehorned and pointless.

---

Next! Guybrush and Elaine (and why they deserve better)!

I would absolutely burn, trash, and obliterate the nagging sitcom wife persona the game decided on Elaine. Not to say she wouldn't be headstrong and straightforward and occasionally curt, but she would not be anywhere near as mean to Guybrush as she is in the base game. So instead of quiet, under-the-breath remarks about how he does useless things and is an idiot cry baby (and that god forsaken stupid montage of a punch she did ONCE. AFTER BEING UNCURSED WHILE SHE WAS ALREADY IN MID-SWING BECAUSE HE MESSED UP), she would be encouraging, understanding, and be someone to help ground Guybrush back into reality because Guybrush does tend to veer off-topic into ramblings.

Not only that, but Guybrush and Elaine would have a more open communication, expressing thoughts, plans, and ideas as well as being each other's cheerleaders (Guybrush if he hit a snag during his adventures and Elaine if she hits a wall during her campaign for re-election). They'd offer one another support and find that second wind with each other because, again, these are a newly wed power couple.... SHOW IT.

Guybrush can keep some of his flirtation that he does... but no... no deep voice. If he does, it's the way he does so in Tales where it's lower, but not creepy low. More to that, reserving his genuine flirts and innuendos to Elaine because, again, this is a newly wed to someone he considers the love of his life.... why the hell would he go and flirt with other women? Stop that.

(And before you all come at me with "But he does so in Tales" yes. Yes. he does. As a puzzle to move Elaine and Morgan. Sit down.)

Let him still be very much in his Honeymoon Phase with Elaine because in the beginning of the game, he is VERY much still in it. The game just hates him and bullies him for it.

Which, while we're focusing on the main lead: Stop. Insisting. That. He's. Stupid! He's not! And I will never fucking forgive Escape for selling that nonsense and fans taking it as fact. He's a goof that bumbles, but the man is clever and thinks outside the box and quicker than most according to the game, even others acknowledged it... others INCLUDING LeChuck, no less. His methods are unorthodox and he says the occasional wrong thing, but stupid he is not.

Which, speaking of others, the occasional bullying from an NPC isn't out of the realms of possibilities, in fact, some of them are genuinely funny interactions because they're written with the initial insult and Guybrush either mocking them right back or being so oblivious to it that it makes the NPC annoyed which adds to the joke. Escape's bullying is just mean spirited and a constant punch down on Guybrush.

So obviously for the rewrite, scrapping the really harsh punch downs and if there has to be bullying, let Guybrush match them or be even meaner... he has done so in MI2 where he was arguably at his meanest.

But at the end of the day, what matters the most, is that Guybrush and Elaine being the power couple that they are. Flaws and all. An occasional disagreement or a quip here and there doesn't hurt, but not resorting them flanderized to being an idiot and nag. They're both clever and loving and try to be better... even if they don't say it out loud.

---

Moving on! The Side Characters!

As mentioned before, I would totally rewrite the mockery the characters do. Some of them are genuinely funny but most are just mean for the sake of being mean. And Monkey Island, for all the snark and quips and everything in-between it has going, is not a mean game for the sake of being mean.

That being said, I love the Dainty Lady and she is THE exception of the mean jokes for the sake of being mean because she's hilarious in that she mocks *everyone*. But I would change some of the more insensitive jokes, or at the very least have her say them, Guybrush calling her out on it, and her muttering a sorry for them with Guybrush asking her to repeat that (either because he misheard or he's "bullying" back) before she gets mad and ends up going "SHUTUP". Small changes like that, y'know?

The Voodoo Lady/Corina obviously stays, as she's the one that helps point Guybrush and Elaine what to do. Firstly giving them a congrats on the marriage, but also has to tell them that for things to be saved, they'll each need to go through two separate routes. It doesn't matter WHO goes, just that they do, and she'll help whichever way she can.

(And she's the one that sort of spells out the Ultimate Insult to the two of them, explaining that right now, it's in its weaken state... Ozzie intends to bring it to its True State and only the two of them can stop him.)

Now for the crew... I'd LOVE to scrap Otis because he adds nothing and he annoys the ever loving crap out of me, however... he is annoyingly needed for this character rewrite: Carla.

And because I want to make that bridge between EMI to how she became her true badass self in Return.

With Carla, I'd keep her grudge and anger at Guybrush. She is 100% valid in her anger with him for essentially ruining her business, taking her to Monkey Island, MAROONING HER, and then having the audacity to act as though they're still friends.

More to that, I'd keep the interaction of Guybrush promising Carla the "cushion-y government job" for her help and Otis piggybacking off of that offer, because the new rewrite plot for her would change from being just another alcoholic that is promised a life of luxury to someone who initially starts that way, but as the adventure keeps going and the more damage she's seeing Ozzie is inflicting to the Caribbean, not just Melee.... the more she "sobers up".

Carla, realizing that her way of life of being a fierce swordfighter and a life of adventure is about to be destroyed and vanished, understands that this is something personal to her. She may have complained in the past about would-be pirates being in her face to swordfight her because of the trials and people like the Shopkeep and Smirk irritating her, but she loved being a pirate, she loved the adventures and the rivalries she formed... she won't say it outright, but it's apparent to us/Guybrush that what Ozzie is doing sits wrong with her.

And Otis will try to insist that a life of doing nothing and relaxing is better. Who needs to work or lift a finger? Have some shmuck like Guybrush do all the work.

She would agree... except that annoying like voice of a conscious is saying otherwise. And she grows slowly during the course of the story of being more and more helpful to Guybrush, becoming sober and better and mending that friendship the two have with Guybrush, genuinely, apologizing for what he did in the past. And its a relationship (a platonic one, I should stress) that could and should be worked on. Of course, it's said in a Guybrush and Carla kind of way. Goofs and all.

It'll end with Carla essentially telling Otis to either help or sit down and shut up, that even Elaine notices the change in behavior in a good way because, well, Carla is one of her citizens and friends. And because Carla is a badass and I will, once again, never forgive EMI for what they did to her.

Ignatius Cheese stays the same, maybe even be the Winslow to Carla during the adventure where he helps her get that spark of adventure back. An angel to Otis's devil, so to speak. Because he's driven to do what's right (even for his own self gain) and isn't about to take the easy way out... and even for someone who owns a bar, he wants to see that Famous Carla the Swordmaster again.

(It ends with Elaine deciding Carla as the new Governor because she has that drive and strength to lead... Guybrush is the one that asks for the only condition that Carla goes completely sober. Carla, grinning, going "that's too easy of a challenge", essentially proclaiming she's done with drinking and a life of no risks and rewards.)

I forgot to mention, that throughout this adventure, Guybrush and Elaine have been seeing weird "landmarks" and tall cranes, and characters like Murray and Stan point it out, with Murray claiming its "unnatural", even for the likes of him and how he'd love to see it burn to the ground and Stan, ever the business man, admitting he wished he thought of that con-- idea first. But as it stands, it's ruining his own business and he's not the biggest fan of it.

And a side tangent, though it's more of who I'd scrap because I have no where else to place said tangent, I say this with my full chest: FUCK. TIMMY.

No Timmy! Timmy is written out, screw that monkey I hate that monkey, we stan Jacques and Sam from the scrapped movie.

---

The Big One: The Final Act's Ultimate Rewrite.

For this rewrite, let's talk third act:

The reason Guybrush gets marooned on Monkey Island again, is because Ozzie heard of the island... the one that LeChuck used to rule and one that Guybrush escaped from. Three freaking times. So after a confrontation between Guybrush and Ozzie, with Guybrush saying he and Elaine are going to expose his plans to use the Ultimate Insult on everyone in the Caribbean, Ozzie knocks him out and has his Ultimate Insulted 'goons' take Guybrush there because if it's one thing Ozzie knows from all those stories, is that Guybrush can and will find a way to screw up his plans.

As for Elaine, currently dealing with trying to find the supposed final piece of the Ultimate Insult to have it be it's strong/true self. And yes, she and Guybrush are on the same page... Guybrush was just trying to buy time for Elaine.

So now we're back on Monkey Island!

..And now... we talk about him.

Herman Toothrot.

Herman. Freaking. Toothrot.

Thankfully, blessedly, Ron Gilbert fixed that retcon of Herman being Elaine's grandfather so it goes without saying yes, I too will not have that in this re-write because it's dumb. And I hate it. I hate it so much.

Here Herman is peeved at all the "junk and litter" that is on the island because if you're going to trash the place, at least give him a heads up so he and his new friend, Jojo Junior (who, for the record does NOT talk and it's more of a LeChimp situation) can relocate to a better home.

Guybrush is confused, what junk? And he looks to see a bunch of primal-esque looking cranes and constructions... something he saw once or twice during his adventure but didn't pay much mind to it.

Now that he sees it all together, it clicks for Guybrush: Ozzie is trying to build something akin to high-rises and shopping complexes (bringing back that commercialized message from earlier) and this will undoubtedly destroy life as a pirate.

And that's bad.

So now Guybrush has to figure out how to get off the island to stop Ozzie and his schemes so he can save Elaine. And all lives on the Caribbean too, he guesses.

(Here I'll admit that I'm still tilting my head to and fro with but so far, the not robot option of how he gets off is because of his "resourcefulness", Guybrush is able to flag down a ship with using the crane as a giant waving flail. A ship being charted by Ignatius and the Dainty Lady no less.)

The ending is the biggest change up, as ya'll can see, but it keeps going.

I still like the original game's idea that Elaine, inadvertently, gave Ozzie the final piece for the Ultimate Insult which is the Gubernatorial Seal. So for the re-write, as she is once again captured and Ozzie takes the piece, threatening to finally use it, Carla comes to help because she's on a redemption arc and the two are ready to overpower Ozzie.

But Ozzie being Ozzie, sends his own people after the two so he can and use the Ultimate Insult to wipe the minds off of everyone.

(Why not use it on the girls, you ask? Because Ozzie is a corporate man and corporate men don't think highly of women ergo, he doesn't see them as much of a threat because he's a misogynistic ass. Tell me I'm wrong.)

Guybrush, making it back to the island and reunited with Elaine and Carla who had rallied the remaining unaffected pirates to go against those that were, sees the giant towering device that would get the Ultimate Insult to hit everyone in the Caribbean. He's not big enough to destroy it or stop it and Elaine and Carla aren't fast enough to catch up to Ozzie at this rate.

Guybrush then sees the aforementioned tall cranes and landmarks and realizes he has a plan, tells the two of them as such and asks them to trust him since there is some doubt with a Guybrush-esque plan.

But they trust him. He proved he could be trusted.

So here we change the giant robot vs. statue to makeshift cruddy crane vs. giant speaker thingie.

Ozzie, naturally, is pissed because how could some backwater pirate ruin his plan? He threatens to use the Ultimate Insult on Guybrush and Guybrush only (cue in a puzzle of avoiding the blasts while also trying to flail the crane like he did to flag down the boat or something of the sort). Guybrush, with luck for once on his side, uses it to whack the tower into nothing... and with it, Ozzie and the Ultimate Insult.

With Melee and the Caribbean saved, and a whole adventure ahead... Elaine realizes that she and Guybrush should explore, not be landlocked.... Guybrush recalls the Government job he offered Carla and that's when the two give her that position, which she takes happily.

---

And THAT'S how I would fix Escape from Monkey Island!

And anything in-between, well, that's nitpicky small details. What's written above is the more important pieces to me~

[realareturns]

A bunch of smaller/miscellaneous NiGHTS findings using the Free Look Camera under the read more

(Sorry if this is kind of disorganized— it was originally a thread on Twitter lol, also this might be part 1 of these because I forgot there’s a photo limit here lol)

The doors in the Dream Gate have little lions on them— kind of hard to see with the game’s usual quality lol

Bomamba’s boss area has some hidden cats that are hard to see normally. There are also fish bones on the ground 😟

The buildings in Bella’s boss area have eyes on them (???)

Chamelan’s boss area— not as interesting as I had hoped but still looks kinda cool from above

This sign in the background of Delight City seems to show some very very simplified pictures of NiGHTS and Reala along with Nightopians

Before the Nightopians appear in this cutscene, they bunch together off camera

If you zoom out during a loading screen, you can see that the regular purple void is contained inside of a larger black void

When NiGHTS gets a key, their hand doesn’t change to show them holding it. Instead it just pokes through their hand (FIRMLY GRASP IT)

Reala’s eyelids are black in cutscenes, but turn blue during his battles or in 2P mode

Most of Lost Park’s rides are very detailed, but you usually can’t see them through the clouds. You can also see inside the blimps for some reason

Also the roller coaster starts violently spinning after a few laps on the track

The 2P race mode has this cool color-changing Ideya icon (orange, purple, and pink Ideya confirmed 👀)

Not a camera thing but still kind of interesting: like the bosses, the enemies also have different file names. Most just state the animal the Nightmaren is based on, but there isn’t a bat enemy in the game, and its files correspond to attacks and features of the moth Nightmaren. Might be a remnant of an earlier idea?

Speaking of bats, the pattern on the train carts in Lost Park kind of look like bats… but the faces remind me of mandrills 😟 bat monkey Nightmaren confirmed

Also a Goodle jumpscare

When NiGHTS takes off their Persona in the intro cutscene for Crystal Castle, they remove it so hard that it goes underground twice

(Sorry this photo is really small) The glass patterns on the windows are probably just random but this one kind of looks like Jackle a little?

You can also mess with the camera to the point their eyelashes fall off :(

Icons from 2P battle mode (also used in JoD’s display at TGS 2007, with what might be a slightly earlier design)

And finally spinning 🫵 That’s all for now lol

[tomibellum]

Here's my new OC his called Manfred his based off a Mandrill.

Armless Ver. & Tailless Ver.

[silverhart-makes-art]

This week's Bestiary Posting is a whole menagerie of mammals. Again, labeled version and short descriptions of my thoughts below.

Shmeashagg - needed to be mottled, I also gave it giant claws on it's forepaws so it can "kill at a single bound". Trying to make it look like it could be the parent of a leopard while trying to make it less lion-like. Goggaerker - a bit more of a dynamic pose of it being stuck in a bush; saw-tooth horns, and big fuzzy ears. Brotkarske - a tiny goat with a markhor-style horn, and long legs Revklogwat - I decided to draw a bird since it's feathered and has wings, but I turned it's wings into forelegs. I also gave it ear tufts like a praire chicken, because they're one of my favorites. Shrobshong - was trying to think how horns are supposed to protect you from falling. I went with big curling ibex horns so the animal can never land on it's head and die. Rest of the animal was a combo of a bull and a takin, with a big nose to warm the air up in it's mountain home. Biklanokyo - this one really turned out looking like an alien. Went with a pose/body reminiscent of a horse. Since it needed to carry a huge horn it needed a think neck, and of course, elephant feet and a deer tail Nutogsheag - I don't know where I was going with this one. Just slapped all the mentioned features on it and gave it a long neck for fun. It's got weird protruding cheek bones like an entelodont, or a warthog, but I don't know why - that's just what I was feeling. Raenwegguk - when I thought of animals that embody wildness to me, especially those found in forests, I thought of wild boar and wolves. Smush the two together and add some extra tusks and you get this noble fellow. Klosweisht - originally meant it to be a sort of hyena-like beast, and some of that is still there, but the mention of horns made me redraw the head and legs as more gazelle-like. It's terrifying when it opens it's mouth and I love it. Kregichmon - pouring through the 'what animal groups haven't I drawn' I happened on 'giraffe-moose with bull horns'. Thokragosk - just a puny little friend. Based on a rodent, but the face turned out a little more like a raccoon, which is cute. Kamyaweneg - just a weird little mole. I had the marsupial mole in mind with their weird fleshy snout and sort of extended it into a helmet for this little guy. I know it doesn't have eyes, but I put a dot where I thought an eye would be, because otherwise it's hard to even figure out what this thing is. Moles are just weird. Extremely successful, but weird. Ghrastasag - so the rest of these are primates and I'm gonna be honest: I don't like drawing non-human primates. Even humans-primates tend to be low on the 'things i love to draw' list. So we're gonna have a lot of sketchy stuff heavily relying on references for these last critters. The lack of real description beyond 'ape' for these also is not helping. Ghrastasag is just a fuzzy baboon. Rigfengtog - another baboon, but this one's showing off it's fangs and is significantly less fuzzy. Ngibealgul - a shaggy gorilla creature. This one looks very thoughtful and solemn for some reason. Gerskatrea - these apes are said to have attractive faces, and the two most attractive primates I thought of off the top of my head, are the mandrill and the emperor tamarin. Hence, mandrill with a mustache. No one can resist a curly mustache. Maerdradli - I was pretty burned out at this point so... more of a doodle then anything, but it's an ape, and it's got a beard, and a fat tail, and I also gave it a droopy mustache because I felt bad for it.

[lmk-monkiesibs-au]

AGES later, here's the rest of the design of the stalwart four. here are the generals!

marshals here

more on them under the cut!

first up, Beng!

he is the oldest of the generals, although no one really knows how long he's been around, and he won't tell either. he's based off a mandrill, and his main color is lilac! no metals for him because he does not care for them.

personality-wise, beng appears to be very aloof and uncaring at a first glance. although when the situation calls for it, he is quick to prove why is that he is a general of huaguoshan; beng is the most experienced of the lot, and is a fantastic magic user... to the point he doesn't use weapons at all, instead sticking to magic alone. which type of magic? shadow magic, which he taught mihou how to wield properly. unlike the prince's, his magic is not purely intrinsic, but bestow-inherited (see note*) — which means he's made a deal for it not unlike xiangliu implied macaque's magic had been acquired in s5 *hint hint*

he is not the most touchy-feely of the bunch, and most certainly gets awkward in any situations involving feelings. he is shit with kids also, but a great teacher. this is the only reason why he gets a 6/10 in mihou's scale. his score would be a lot lower otherwise.

next up, Ba!

ba is the second oldest, tallest and physically strongest of the generals. based off an orangutan, their main color is red, and metals are gold! they are the only one of the stalwart four to use armor besides Liu.

personality-wise, ba is the biggest softie around. seriously. they're rated a 8/10 in mihou's scale for that honestly. at first, there was questioning why they were even selected as a general, but time showed their true value. ba is a skilled fighter, and great with magic too — although not as confident/arrogant about it as beng) — going to great lengths to be of service to anyone who needs it. extremely humble, all ba wants to do is to help the monkeys of Huaguoshan in any way they can. they are almost as much of an optimist as ma, and pretty informal as well.

their weapon of choice is the meteor hammer — it is heavier than most can handle, and fairly hard to use... making it perfect for ba, really.

also i am aware that ba looks WILDY different and more detailed but that is because my art has evolved a lot from the time i drew liu/ma/beng for the first time lmao

*i'm treating magic based on this magic class analysis by @/that-guy-sleepy-miles. they are of course being adapted by the resolutions i already had for this au. in beng's case, im thinking his magic was bestowed by whatever the "him" was that xiangliu implied the deal had to be made with, and that is behind all the chaos business from s5. i am not fully commiting to explaining what beng would have to do with that until we get a better explanation hopefully in s6. just know that he made a deal or whatever, and mihou didn't (though he did cultivate upon his intrinsic magic)

[docgold13]

Profiles in Villainy 

Scarlemange

Heralding from the post-apocalyptic realm of the Age of Wonderbeasts, Hugo Oak was a mutated mandrill possessing pheromone-based mind-control powers. With his abilities and enhanced intellect, sat at the very top of Las Vistas's food chain ruling the land with an iron fist.  

Hugo was originally a normal primate that was mutated and raised by Lio and Song. The cruel treatment he endured under the human scientists who commissioned his mutation, and the eventual perceived desertion of his adoptive family, left Hugo with a lasting grudge against the human race. Upon acclimating to the surface world and weaponizing his coercive pheromones, he rechristened himself 'Scarlemagne' and crusaded to reunite the surface under his banner.

A despotic ruler who championed his fellow primates through intimidation and mind-control, Scarlemange was feared across the surface for the reach and scope of his power. He sought to build a golden city from which he could rule over his fellow mutes, and very nearly succeeded before Kipo and her allies were able to depose him at his own coronation, costing him his captive army in the process. Shortly afterwards, Scarlemagne was captured and imprisoned by the Timbercats.

After his reformation he joined Kipo in the fight against Emilia. In the final battle, he sacrificed himself to save his adoptive sister, Kipo.

Actor Dan Stevens provided the voice for the villain, first appearing in the sixth episode of Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts, airing on January 14th, 2020.