#man mail

[puppppppppy]

littlest furth shop

@laikascomet

[haleyusesherwords]

I appreciate that everyone thought Tango would take its easy this season after Decked Out. Go full grumpy old man, murdering anyone who bothered him. Yet here he is… building a redstone mail delivery service with dynamic chunk loading while still in his starter base.

Meanwhile, TCG mastermind and map connoisseur VintageBeef is *this* close murdering Iskall for touching his farmhouse walls.

[nvuy]

im like itching for a boothill x single parent romance. LIKE WHAT IF they moved in next to boothill and everyones like "naww dont go near that guy hes scary and shit" but when kid sees boothill they get so intrigued by boothill they try to get close to him every time they see and hes just... scared? or paranoid, so he doesnt let them close. and then one time kid was still asking questions to boothill and stuff, parent was rushing looking for them, they see them, and then goes like "omf sir im so sorry my kid bothered you" and then boothill is like "nah its ok id do anyt- no what i mean we just met its cool btw lmao"

yk that one scene in a goofy movie where max get laughed at on the bleachers and then roxanne comes and picks him up and asks if he’s alright and then max starts babbling absolute gibberish yep

“So, how strong are you, mister?”

Boothill’s fingers are pressed against the girl’s tiny tiny hands. So small and little and squishy, and he seriously contemplated squishing her until she popped. His palm is cold against hers, and she giggles at the difference in size.

“Hmm…” He leans back on his heels in his squatting position in the front garden. He taps his chin in thought. “Don’t gotta clue. Anythin’ you need me to pick up?”

The girl gasps and there’s stars in her eyes. “Can you pick me up?” She stretches out her arms towards him.

He cracks a grin at her and ruffles her hair. “I dunno. You might be a bit heavy.” He’s teasing her, of course, but she pouts.

“At least try.”

“Alright, little lady.” He hooks his arms underneath hers and hoists her up easily, hands locked at her ribs. “How’s that? Good enough for ya?”

She hums thoughtfully, a cheeky smile on her face as she, too, taps her chin. “Now you gotta carry me for the entire day.”

It was his turn to pout. “N’aw. That’s no fair.”

“There you are!” There’s a rustle of footsteps and the jangling of keys to his left that made him stiffen for a moment, before your familiar face comes into view. Your eyes flit from him to your daughter. “I’ve been calling you for lunch.”

Oh, great Heavens.

“Hi, gorg– uh…” The ranger stumbles over his tongue and zips his lips shut when a small smile stretches into your lips. “We were– I was just– uh…”

Your daughter looks upset when Boothill gently places her back down in the grass.

“Just horsin’ ‘round,” he finishes. “I was just passin’ by, y’see? And your lil’ princess chased me down.”

You clear your throat, staring down at your shoes for a moment and trying to hide the heat rising from your neck to your face.

“I’m sorry about her,” you say to him. “She’s, um… hard to control.”

“That’s a good thing,” he whispers down to your daughter. “Means you got a free spirit.” He pokes her in the side and she giggles.

You give him another look and his eyes snap to the left, and a casual tune leaves his lips in the form of a whistle.

You offer a hand to the girl. “I made pasta.”

Your daughter practically barrels into your side, almost knocking you over with how her small arms wrap around your hips—she used to only be able to reach your knees. God, time flies.

Your eyes flit to the ranger once more. “Um… I made a lot so… if you’re hungry…” Your eyes trail down to his stomach before you swallow. “Do you get hungry?”

He studies your face for a moment with a pensive look.

Then, Boothill snorts. “Nah, sugar.”

Your face is burning. “Right. Well, you’re welcome to come in, anyway.”

“Oh, please have lunch with us!” your daughter all but begs. Her hands have now interlocked in front of her in a pleading gesture, and she’s offering him her most intense puppy eyes. “I can show you my room.”

He’s immediately swayed. “Well, it’s hard to say no to a cute thing like you.” He reaches down and pinches her cheek.

He watches you blink, perhaps taken aback for a moment.

He thinks you’re so beautiful, even if the apron you’re wearing is covered in sauce stains.

He almost starts cheering when you visibly perk up. “You’ll join us?”

“’Course! I’d do anythin’ for y–” He stops himself by digging his teeth into his tongue. “I mean… if ya insist.”

He can tell you’re biting the inside of your cheeks to keep yourself from smiling too wide. You pucker your lips and look elsewhere, face dark with blood.

Your daughter is strangely silent. He notices she’s enamoured with a bright blue butterfly floating along one of the bushes nearby.

“Cool.” You can’t think of anything else to really say. You rock on your heels absentmindedly. “I’d like that.”

His smile grows impossibly wider. “Would ya now?” He taps your nose once before he bends down to greet your daughter again. “Lead the way, little lady.”

“One sec,” you mumble, digging in your pockets.

You fumble for your ring of keys before you throw them quite badly at the cyborg. He manages to catch them well enough, fingers frozen over the steel.

Huh?

“It’s, um… the purple key. For the front door.”

Sure enough, one of the keys was coated in a deep purple.

Your daughter has already begun sprinting towards the front door. You’re half keeping a close eye on her through your peripherals, but your gaze wanders from her to watch him closely.

“I have a spare so… you can have it,” you continue slowly. Was this… too forward?

Boothill eyes you for a moment. A hand moves to his hips.

Then, in a flash, he pulls the purple key off of the ring it’s attached to and gently tosses it back at you. You struggle to catch them, but you manage with shaky hands and stuff them back into your pocket.

“‘Ppreciate it, pretty thing. You know just how to make a man swoon.”

He blows you a kiss with the steel to his lips and then tips his hat. He catches up with your daughter in no time, sweeping her off her feet and letting her slot the key in the lock to open the door.

You realise when he’s staring at you, one hand holding your own front door open expectantly, that you’re standing out in your front garden gawking at him like an idiot.

You quickly follow him inside, and he closes the door behind you. He’s quick to swing an arm around your waist when you guide him into the kitchen.

[bella-babyy]

Percy Jackson is a golden retriever boyfriend

Leo Valdez is a chihuahua boyfriend

Jason Grace is a boy cat boyfriend

[eightspringdays]

The Boys

[somedancingdoodles]

my insane immediate post vengeance saga thoughts got peer reviewed by my friends so uh- here

[iliothermia]

(tries thinking of horror oc) (it's still romantic)

[lale-txt]

god take all my period cramps and give them to atsumu miya

[lurkinginnernarrator]

au where SQQ does undergo the 'qi-deviation' and is 'changed' but in reality the twin of Shen Jiu, Shen Yuan made a comment one day about how all Shen Jiu did was bitch about his martial siblings. Never one to turn down a golden opportunity,

Shen Jiu: bet

And so the twins decided to switch lives!

The qi-deviation is just so they can explain away any differences of temperament and so sj can hightail away easier.

Shen Yuan: this is going to be so easy

(spoiler. it wasn't)

Between useless sect meetings that could've been not even an email but a text message, reading fifteen different preteens attempts to sneak in dick jokes into their poetry assignments, the head cook alerting him to the fact that they've somehow run out of rice??? They're the greatest cultivation sect??? How does that happen???

Anyway, two of his Hall masters eloping together and taking an extended honeymoon (he's happy for them, but. Who's going to teach those classes now??? Him. Apparently.), sect politics and his 'martial siblings' barely even attempting a farce of civility or courtesy AND his guqin strings needing to be replaced and restrung ?

Shen Yuan is sorry 🙏🙏please come back🙏🙏🙏

Cue the allotted period of switching ending and Shen Yuan dramatically throwing the fan on the ground as Shen Jiu rolls up and goes "thanks for the vacation didi"

[raileurta]

My human!

Bots can be pretty overprotective and possessive over their human(s). Especially when being given affection or being cleaned. For example like this person with her lion.

I imagine one day Sam is giving Bumblebee a car wash when Barricade shows up.

The war is over in this au and he's reformed so he's not going to be blasted. Anyways he's got to talk with Sam about something but Bee is having none of that. He revva his engines, threatens him with a blaster, etc. Sam is like calm your maggy ass down. Doesn't work. So he has to finish the wash before he can talk to Barricade.

Another idea is one day Optimus gets hit with something that makes him revert to a feral thing using only his base coding for logic. The autobots are all there when it happens. At first it's kinda fine he's just acting like an overgrown puppy. Then the former decepticon barricade drives over to them with Sam inside to be dropped off. Optimus sees this then absolutely loses it and flings himself at them.

He flees very scared/confused, with Optimus in hot pursuit. The autobots explain through comm links what is happening with him. Eventually Optimus reaches them so Barricade has to transform to protect himself plus the human. When the prime sees Sam plopped out on the grass he immediately goes to grab him. Scared as hell Sam dodges the hand then books it to a little cave nearby. Barricade tries to fend off Optimus as long as he can but he's only one bot. When the prime beats him he runs after Sam trying to grab him again. Sam just in time manages to make it into the cave. The feral transformer desperately claws at the ground trying all he can to get him out. After a few minutes of frantic digging the human hears a kind old microwave type of noise that somehow is soothing? Sam takes a peak to see that Optimus was making the noise; with some of the most heartbroken eyes he's ever seen. When the autobots catch up they recognize the sound that's being made. Creators would use it to call for their sparklings. Finally knowing that Optimus didn't actually want to hurt Sam he comes out (I'm gay) of the cave. Big ole bot grabs him asap and affectionately nuzzles him, scent, hug, etc him.

It takes two days for the effects to wear off so Sam and Bee have to deal with a lot of mother heaning. He's protective of the other bots too but these two are his fragile babies!

[iamderp07]

Mama's Little Mailman 💌 (WIP)

[the-evermore-willow]

One of my favourite things about Lord Huron's music is how there's often a guy who straight up refuses to die/pass on because of how much he loves being alive. Implying that the laws of nature are helplesss in face of his love of this world. Maybe *you* have to die eventually, but he's built different. He ain't going nowhere, he likes it here!

I said we're all gonna die but I'll never believe it, I love this world and I don't wanna leave it. Said that death is a deal that you cannot refuse, but I love you, girl, and I don't wanna lose you. -The Man Who Lives Forever

I stared right into the endless void and I ain't going back if I got any choice. I know how to live, I don't know how to die and there ain't no thrills in the afterlife. So lift me up out of here, my friend, and I'll wander the night 'til the ages end. - Dead Man's Hand

Die if I must, let my bones turn to dust, I'm the lord of the lake and I don't want to leave it. All who sail off the coast evermore will remember the tale of the ghost on the shore. -Ghost On The Shore

What is life? Only visions. When I die, I'm coming right on back for you. -Hurricane (Johnnie's Song)

All of the joy I've known, the ways I've grown, the loves I've shown my heart to. I'm gonna get it together and live forever. -What Do It Mean

I just think it's such a wholesome sentiment and I love that for them.

[baynetta]

asking miguel to give you a back massage because your lower back has be killing you! and he starts getting distracted (y’all r in backshots position)

every single day i think about what would be to have a beast of a man always touch starved. let’s picture it, miguel is the type of guy no matter how angry, stressing or even on the edge of a mental breakdown, that man it’s always down bad for you. so when you ask him to do an subtle act like a back massage, how could he say no?. what kind of boyfriend he would be to negate such a innocent act?. the truth is that that never ends up well for you, like let’s be real why you even got that back pain in the first place. “ya mi chiquita, where it hurts?” he casually comes from behind, slowly sliding his hands from the sides of your hips. his fingertips gently carresing your curvy hips, as you throw your head back, resting your head on his solidly built chest. you close your eyes just enjoying whatever he was trying to do with you. then you feel him kissing you in the forehead. this love gestures is what send tickles down, you often love when he’s rough on you but when he’s like this, taking extra care of you makes you want to melt right there. “no te hagas la bonita, where it hurts?”. as you open your eyes, you see him looking right down at you, his stare, god how long he has been hungirly creeping at you?. “more in the center, like in the low back” you said slightly annoyed that he’s playing too much. “mmh i see..” now you have his full focus in your back, tbh the man was fully cheeking your ass, how the bum gently moves up when he drags the palm of his hands in circles, in the exact right place that you wanted. you were wearing that tight pijamas that left little to the imagination, so he’s fucking holding back like craaazy.

he use his knuckles to press it on your center and then go up throughyour spine and then down, reaching a little lower from your low back. he then uses his free hand to grab on your hip. his grip start to become tidder once a soft moan scape from your pretty dirty mouth, “te gusta así?” he asked as you can feel his lips near your left ear, the tip of his nose smelling your sweet aroma, going from your hair to your neck, that man was savoring every single of inch of you (he likes to play with his meal before eating it so 🤭), you just nod impatiently for more. now he just couldn’t take it anymore, and fully pressed down his painful erection on your beautiful plump ass, now holding both of your hips, guiding your ass to fully grind on his long hard shaft. it was still and even with the light fabric covering it with the friction you can feel every angry vein of his cock. that shit is just mouth watering to you. “miguel.. que pesado eres” you said annoyed and you kinda were, that man is going to end up breaking you in half. but with your ungrateful attitude you just earn a hard and loud spank from him, making you gasp out of the surprise and the sting that made your bum burn like crazy. god you’re just causing him to be more frustrated “who did this you?”, “who hurt that pretty back of you, huh?” he asked while forcing you to look up at him, his eyes where so lustful like he hasn’t been touched in months, “mm?” he asked again while playing with your lips with his fat thumb. you just bat your eyes at him giving him that inocent look, those bambi “fuck me” eyes that you know it makes him go insane, you’re such a fucking tease. the way he quickly pull down your shorts and panties, just enough so he can fully see that piece of ass he loves to use it to get himself off, like whenever you’re bending down he would not wait to play with it, to make it bounce on his cock until he pleases. but now he was tired of just pressing it down, he needed more. “miguel, can you..” you said as you tried to face him, “shut up” he spits as he push your back on to the kitchen counter, you try to protest but he keeps forcing you to stay still, you know that he doesn’t play, if he wants to be brutal it’s up to you. suddenly he lifts your mini top so your soft nipples are touching the freezing ceramic, you whine, you want to be his good fuck-toy and not protest but you just can’t help it. it’s humiliating, he’s just torturing you at this point. the way you know that tomorrow it’s gonna hurt even more. “now do me a favour, stay still y callada o te irá peor”

(pd: i definitely can do a part 2 of this one 🤭)

trad:

okay tiny

stop acting dumb

like that?

miguel you’re so annoying

and shut up or it’s gonna be worse

[wammyhoe]

Liking Mello is not enough, I need to join the mob

[wammypilled]

The name may not make sense but the face??

[dearest-painter]

Oooo Yandere platonic Batfam x neglected and abused batsib reader with spider powers x Yandere platonic Miguel, Jess, Peter B and spider-society!?! Reader finally done with the abuse runs away and gets found by Miguel all beaten and bruised and takes them in and him and the others raise them? (Batsib is 12 at this point when Miguel takes them in). Years later Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian find reader with Gwen, Miles and Hobie fighting an anomaly when things get out of hand and Reader calls Miguel, Jess and Peter B for back up!?! Oh the chaos!!

Yeah, they call Miguel dad when they become 14. Miguel is so happy to be called dad, Lyla is Titi Lyla, Jessica is Auntie Jess, and Peter B is Uncle Pet. When the batfam sees Spider-Bat!Reader(aka abused and neglected reader bc it helps sort my stuff) fighting with three other teenagers they feel so happy to see them…until Bruce hears “TITI LYLA! PLEASE GET DAD AND THE OTHERS! SHITS GOING SOUTH!” You..replaced him…Jason is happy you replaced him as your in a good happy family. He knows he doesn’t deserve your forgiveness as he didn’t help you but it’s good to see you happy.

Soon Miguel and Jessica and Peter B arrive, they help you all out. Once it’s done you see your family…bio family, you grabbed Miguel’s hand scared, your supposed to be tough but seeing your bio family scares you. Miguel saw your family and immediately hands you to Jessica so she can calm you down. Bruce and Miguel get into a screaming match, your Bio brothers are blocked by Gwen, Hobie, and Miles as they know all about your history with them. Only Alfred is allowed to see yoy. Bruce wants you back but Miguel is plotting to murder him.