#man im so excited for this scene and born again

[bullseyelover]

wilson bethel as benjamin “dex” poindexter aka bullseye on the set of daredevil born again

[ivy-diaries]

‎ ⁎ ‎ ‎ 𓍼 ‎ ‎ ๋ ‎ ◜ &.&. THE IVY INCIDENT S1 ep #2◞ ‎ ... ‎ ‎

˒ wc! 3k

˒ starring! Ivy Kang , Yeonjun Choi

˒ taglist! @stealanity @alixnsuperstxr @riikiblr @skz-libby @escapetheash (lmk if you wanna be added)

˒ desc! on this episode of "The Ivy Incident" ivy welcomes her husband, TXT'S Yeonjun as the first guest of the season where they talk about their relationship, wedding and much more!

The Ivy incident intro plays and ivy is once again seated in the same place as last episode but this time, the camera is just showing her instead of the whole setting. Ivy smiles and leans in so the mic can catch her voice nice and sound.

“Hey guys!! welcome or welcome back to the Ivy incident! if you didn't know already this is a podcast where I invite my friends and close people to come on and just have a good chat for sometime! if you guys haven't done all the basics about adding this pod to your favorites and giving it a review of your choice, do it right now and putting all of that aside, let's begin!” she grins, claps her hands together and looks at the camera. The grin is somewhat a naughty one. not the kind you think… get your mind off the gutter!

She chuckles and continues, “last week for our first episode, we had no guest and it was just me and Diane in the studio by ourselves but today, we have a very exciting and probably the most requested one after I asked who I should invite here. and probably I should mention this too, this person was the most excited to be here too!” There's a deep chuckle heard in the background and Ivy looks off camera and smiles. 

“So without further ado, let's have the first guest of the season introduce themselves!” she adds on and the camera pans out and TXT's Yeonjun comes into frame with an identical mic set up as ivy. He chuckles before speaking, “hi everyone. this is tomorrow by together's yeonjun or in this scenario jen's husband and just like she mentioned, im very excited to be here” 

A few claps are heard behind the camera, probably from the couple's staff members and the couple start laughing at that. “Thank you so much for that guys, we're honored to have that kind of a welcome” she laughs and the scene cuts to a small video of yeonjun just to introduce him and a small snippet of ivy and yeonjun’s wedding video.

“So! how does it feel to be here finally? and how have you been? update us on recent life happenings!” Ivy asks her husband and smiles lovingly at him as he stares at her with the same if not more affection than her stare.  

“So the first and obvious thing is that I got married to my beautiful wife and yes, married life is so great! And other than that, we’re preparing for a comeback as a group and for a tour if i can say that yet… and that has been hectic but it's fun to be back with the boys after a while.” he answers ivy with a smile. 

She smiles in return, “That's so nice to hear! Although it's not fun to watch you come home late and tired, it's nice to hear you're having fun with the guys! So we got a lot of questions from moas, soleils and the viewers of this pod who have subscribed to the email newsletter. There were a lot of repeated questions, I heard.. So we’re gonna do the ones that were frequently asked! Are you ready to begin this husband?” she asks him and smiles at him (for the millionth time) 

“Yup! I was born ready! Also, I love it when you call me your husband if I'm being honest.” he answers and gives her a lovesick smile which makes her giggle in return. 

“Okay! First question! This is too funny to not read it verbatim oh my god! It says, What was the man's first impression of Ivy? “ ivy reads it and laughs 

“Not the yeonjun slander again oh my god” yeonjun says and laughs with her but stops laughing eventually to answer the question 

“I think at first, I was just intimidated by her sheer talent and the fact that she was a senior. Like if we go back to the beginning and before we both met each other, she had already established a name for herself at what? The age of 14, 15? To think of it now is pure insanity! Wait.. i think i’ve gone off topic here, but yea, to me she was a cool senior and even though she was younger than me, she was the most talented person i’d ever seen. When I saw her on that monthly evaluation, I still remember the date by the way, I fell in love instantly. The way she carried herself was and is still mind blowing to me.” he concludes after yapping for a bit.

Ivy looks starstruck at his explanation and chuckles. “I knew you’d have stuff to say but I didn't know you’d say so much! And for the record, I do too remember the date of the day we first saw each other and actually it's more memorable because i had bought my polaroid camera with me that day and a few of the trainees asked me if they could take a picture with me and he was one of them and with him, we took two pictures and i took one polaroid with me and he took one with him. Mine is still in my photobook!” She tells the camera her side of the story and a few awws are heard from behind the camera and the couple just laugh.

“Okay, so I will read the next question! Who said "I love you" first? Oohh okay a classic question” yeonjun reads it off and looks at ivy

“He did. Although I felt that I loved him, it took me quite some time to say it out loud.. He said it to me when we were “cooking” ” she air quotes it and laughs “we were making a mess literally. And then we were suddenly slow dancing and then we started giggling and then through the giggles he suddenly goes oh my god i love you and i freeze. And then he realizes he's said it out loud and then he freezes but he’s quick to recover. He gives me a smile and says like it’s very true but like you don’t have to say it back just cause i've said it now.. Take your time and stuff and all of this is not going into my head” she laughs “it's just going in one ear and off the other. But like it took me a few more months to muster up the courage and finally say it. And when i did, he cried” yeonjun laughs at her words recounting the scene in his head 

The couple take a few moments to recover and then they're back with the third question. “Ooh this one’s a little spicy “Have you guys ever been caught in the act? What was your guys’ reaction?” ” she reads it out and looks at her husband.

They hold eye contact for a good 5 seconds before bursting out laughing. “Poor beomgyu has seen stuff way more times than he should've '' she says.

“But like yeah.. Like all couples, we’ve been caught doing some stuff a few times.. I mean thank god not in the middle of the act but like we’ve been caught by beomgyu i think thrice? And once by my mum and thankfully that's it.. I don’t wanna explain this any more than that since we have a lot of young viewers'' Ivy laughs before concluding

“Ok! Fourth question? “how did all your friends react when you told them you were engaged?” That is a great question cause we have footage for all of these! I filmed it and stay tuned for it guys, the wedding series will be posted soon! It's just that I'm having a hard time editing and working at the same time so I don't know how long it’ll take but I’ll try my best to finish them asap! But anyways back to the question..” 

“Okay for starters, they were really happy but they were all really reactions” yeonjun says and Ivy laughs remembering them. 

“To start with the boys, they were all very happy for us and you know since they’ve been with us ever since we started dating, they know everything that went down, they kept saying that we really belonged to each other and made each other the better version of ourselves. It was really nice to hear it actually” ivy says and yeonjun nods agreeing. 

“To say I received threats from all of her friends is an understatement. And to make matters worse, they're my friends too.” Ivy laughs at his words. 

“The pandora girlies were mostly really happy for us although some of them pretended to have a sob party over this” ivy laughs. 

“Lua, obviously, was very sweet about it, she congratulated us and wished us the best as always.. Jeongie however, was the one we were all looking out for you know, since i’ve known her for a pretty long time, and as i expected, she teared up making a few of us tear up as well.” she laughs at the memory. 

“The funny thing is, me and her were like hugging each other and crying and like that was it, and the next day i hear beomgyu going like “yeonjun hyung is gonna sleep with both eyes open cuz he made jeongie cry” and the even funny part is enha didn't even know why she cried but was like “hyung what did you do” and the whole time i was just on the floor laughing” ivy laughs. 

“My misery is so funny isn't it?” yeonjun asks and laughs “oh that wasn't even the bad ones, just you wait” he says looking directly into the camera making everyone laugh.

“Rin went absolutely wild. She was jumping, screaming one second and the next she was like all serious and was like “omg what would happen to your careers and stuff” and we had to remind her that like the public would not be mad if we got married but would absolutely come for our throats if we didn’t and then she was back to being unhinged and took like a million pictures of my ring in a million different angles.” ivy laughed and showed the camera her ring

“Can i just tell you how offended she got because i didn’t ask her for jens hand and like her opinion of the ring? She was out for my throat. And at one point she tried to drunk fight me.. Like actually throw hands and i'm not gonna like i was terrified” yeonjun says making everyone laugh 

“She threw me a party for like my promotion to fiance from girlfriend where she was just asking me every single detail of the proposal” ivy laughs

“Inka had almost the same reaction, she pushed me away to give jen a hug, again, threatened me with a "if you hurt her i'll kill you" look but to my surprise, by the end of it, she teared up and like genuinely congratulated us” yeonjun says smiling 

“The others were all really happy and like gave us the biggest hugs and like you could tell they were all really happy for us by their reactions.” Ivy says. 

“Okay, next question, what is this the fifth question? “Who first brought up the option of marriage? Was it an easy topic?” that's a great question”

“Hmmm… the first time I think we ever brought up marriage was when we were stuck in lockdown together and had nothing better to do..” ivy laughs “we had both agreed we were not ready yet and would wait a year or two more to even get engaged and that timeline worked perfectly i guess.. But surprisingly every now and then I get a few comments from people that I got married too young? I mean relatively i am young but i was not too young when i got married so i don't really understand their point” ivy says and yeonjun nods. 

“Next question, this question is really interesting “What made Ivy and and yeonjun realize that they're in love with each other and what was their big 'oh I want to marry this person' moment???” ” ivy reads of the question 

“Okay i’ll go first.. I think my big moment was, this is kinda bad if i say it out loud oh my god” yeonjun laughs but continues nonetheless and ivy just gives him a raised eyebrow

“This was on our second anniversary.. I had big plans for us not gonna lie.. Even if I think about it now, the eighteen year old me had some rizz.. So naturally I was very excited, but when I went to pick Jen up, she was as sick as sick could get. She was throwing up and stuff and I could not just stand there and watch it happen. I threw off my blazer - yes I wore a blazer.. I spent the night taking care of her and I actually liked it.. Like it made me realize that I'd give up on anything to make sure she was okay and I think that's when I realized I wanted to spend my life with her” he concludes with a soft smile. 

Ivy is seen with a smile and glossy eyes and she laughs when a few staff point it out. “I know this because he mentioned it when he was drunk once and I sobbed over it. But it never fails to make me tear up. Uhm.. it's kinda funny because my realization is the morning after this” ivy laughs as she dabs her eyes with a tissue her husband handed her. 

“I woke up the next morning and was obviously a lot better and just saw him on the side of my bed sitting on a stool sleeping.. And like for a moment i was very surprised and then it hit me that like i was sick on our anniversary and had ruined it… but when i looked around, i realized that he had taken care of me and i don't know how to describe this feeling but i was very grateful that he had done that for me and it was only after he left my place that day and after my schedules, i realized that i actually hated living alone and not coming home knowing he’d be there waiting or he’d come home to me as well.. Does that make any sense? We wouldn't live together for two more years but still.." Ivy says and turns to yeonjun and gives him a loving smile. 

“Seventh question! “Have you guys ever thought of having a family?” oohhh” yeonjun reads it and looks at ivy

“We have but not anytime soon…. I’d love to have a family one day but not now because truthfully i think we’re both doing really well career wise and we have a few more things we want to accomplish before you know, taking it slow and have a baby.. Plus, we’ve talked about it and we don't want to raise our child in the city because as much as i love the city vibes, it’s not my ideal place to start a family if it makes any sense” ivy replies

“Everything Jen said and like at the end of the day, it’s her body and just like Rachel Green said, no uterus no opinion.” yeonjun says and the staff bursts laughing. 

“Third to last question!! “Who cooks and who washes the dishes?” these questions are freaking everywhere omg” ivy laughs 

“Well it depends on who gets home first! If I get home first, I cook or if he does, he cooks! It's simple in the choi household!” ivy smiles 

“Second to last! “Who's the closest to their in-laws?” That is a good question isn't it?” yeonjun says. 

“Well we’re both very close to each other’s families so I wouldn't really compare who's closer.. But jun is very close to my brother cuz they're the same age and they match each others vibes and i’m pretty close to his mother and i'm so thankful for this but like she makes me vegetarian friendly dishes of like actual korean dishes so i can eat them too and it's soo sweet of her and i love her for it” she says giving the camera a hand heart knowing her mother-in-law watches her videos. 

“Last question “what were your vows? And how was your wedding day” oh no..” ivy laughs as she reads the question. 

“Okay we’re not gonna answer this right now because we have a video of it but we’ll give you like little insights of it” she says 

“I wrote stuff about our past and what we promised each other when we were young.. I mean we were and still are pretty young but we were just kids when we started dating. I mean she was 16, I was 17… and I mean we are still just 24 and 25 but we were literally just kids when we met and we had so many dreams and things we wanted to achieve individually and together and I think we are doing pretty fine compared to what we started..” yeonjun says smiling 

“I mean it was really emotional and we made almost everyone cry hearing it and we still cried looking at the video when we got it back from our photographer.. I’d say we had a pretty normal wedding for people who work in this industry. Because we had like a few ceremonies” ivy laughs 

“The first, we had it in Paris where we had a little private wedding and then we came back to korea and had, not a wedding but we had like a reception or a large dinner party you could say because most of our friends and jun’s family lives in korea. And then we had our final ceremony in the US because most of my family lives there. The one in Korea was somewhat public but the other two were not and I'm really thankful for it if I'm being honest. Because we know how some people are from just seeing airport footage of idols these days. So like I was saying.. Am I yapping now?” Ivy asked and it made yeonjun laugh. 

“No no you're fine go on” yeonjun laughs 

“As I was saying.. We had a really fun time at our wedding! Our vows were really emotional as we were saying in the beginning. I’ll try and tell you guys what they were because i don't think we have them right now” ivy looks at her husband and he nods in agreement. 

“So yea I guess that answers the question.. I don't even know what I said.. I think i was yapping mostly so im very sorry for that” she laughs 

“But that concludes today’s episode!” yeonjun groans at her words “he doesn’t wanna go home.. But please tell us your thoughts about how you felt today!” ivy laughs 

“I had soo much fun today.. I mean I always have the best time when you're around so this was the usual.. Okay okay i’ll stop flirting!” he laughs as ivy threatens to throw a pillow at him. “As I was saying, I had soo much fun and I hope I can come back one day! Thank you so much for having me here and this has been tomorrow by together’s yeonjun so far! Thank you!” he says and everyone claps

“That's it for this episode and I hope you guys enjoyed today where i had a great time talking with yeonjun and stay tuned for the upcoming episodes and this has been ivy so far and thank you for listening to the ivy incident! Have a great day or good night!! Byee!!” Ivy and yeonjun wave and the outro plays with clips of Ivy being cute throughout the episode.

˒ priya talks! the edit of the cover is not mine!! credits to the creator and pinterest where I found it!! if you've read this far, cuz this is pretty long, reblog with a 🧸!! let me know who you guys want to see next on the episode!! love ya!!

[howyouloveyourdragon]

alpha rhaenyra and omega aegon (platonic) headcanons. she along with daemon come back to the keep and find they need to protect aegon and possibly the other kids from otto and alicent if she won't listen. I imagine people like otto would not be okay with any of the boys being omega as it possibly lessens their claim so would be angry. (really fluffy but little angsty). possibly ends up with Jace or someone else if you want to put in romance.

thank you evattude my love for this request! it was very fun to explore :) i strayed a little bit because i wasn't entirely sure which timeline to go with so i hope that that is okay! i added some fluffy jace romance at the end because come on i can't ignore that boy, im sorry if i have not quite integrated a/b/o dynamics as well as you want, it has been awhile since i wrote for that universe so im a bit rusty <3

dividers by: firefly-graphics

all her life, Rhaenyra has been made to feel lesser than for her gender; by Otto, the men at court, possible intendeds, everyone

so when aegon is born she resents him

he will be everything that she was not for her father and she cannot ignore that

but everything changes when she presents for the first time, every feeling is heightened

she can feel the power rushing through her veins, the strength, everything is going to change

she's certain

but then everything falls apart

she needs to satisfy her newfound hunger and her uncle is eager to show her the ways of their world, being an alpha himself

excitement boils her blood even further, desperate, hungry and eager to feed her inner dragon

but he rejects her, abandoning her in a cold brothel for his brother to assume the worst

so she finds another outlet in Ser Criston Cole

and when her father finds out of her urges he has half a mind to disinherit her but she is future Queen

he knows it, he feels it

so he allows this slip so long as she marries Laenor Velaryon, another alpha and heir to the Driftmark throne

she fights and claws while still up to the brim with these changes, still unused to the growth in her muscle and discomfort in her joints

her uncle is her mate and she is being torn from him

but she has no choice

they are fated, she is sure that one day they will joing again

slowly she agrees but begrudging

Rhaenyra is merely glad that can convince Laenor to stay at the castle with her

the years pass and she has born three sons, all promising and with increasing strength

her heir Jacaerys even bares the traits she had upon the brink of her presentation, she could not be more proud until the event in which a pig aids the breakdown of a family

and then the incident with Vhagar occurs and they leave for Dragonstone after a rushed wedding

a mate is something sacred, someone to protect with your life and both the uncle and niece intend to

until she walks in on a scene she wishes she could forget

her brows furrow, ears overhearing Otto Hightower's scold but to whom?

she peeks through the open doorway and her heart sink to curn her stomach

"What would your mother say?" The older man hisses, grasping the pale boy's shoulder

"I-I-I cannot–it's not my fault!" Her brother's words stumble, her sympathy breaches

a lump forms in her throat as familiar words belt in her ears

"This is not what your mother needs right now, you are a disappointment to the throne and a disappointment to me." Aegon holds back his flinch

"I do everything you ask of me," His voice sounds so quiet, so fragile

"And yet you are still not enough." The grown man sneers. "You were supposed to marry your sister, child. Tell me how an omega could be King? Answer me!"

Silence locks them in time. Torturous time.

which is why Rhaenyra clears her throat and lets her presence be known

"Have you no shame?" She bellows, sharp and encompassing the regality of a Queen crowned

Otto doesn't back down, he only quirks a brow and bows shortly

"Princess," He greets, contempt seeping from his tongue

his gaze flickers to his grandson

"A pleasure to see you after all this time." Aegon doesn't look at her, his gaze stays firmly planted on his shoes

her own lilac sights narrow on him

"Aegon," she calls

his head snaps up at the acknowledgement and Otto's lips part in surprise

Aegon slowly turns around and she winces at the red in his face, his eyes are so bloodshot she would assume him drunk again but his pupils are surprisingly trained

"What is wrong, dear boy?" he hesitates even more at the sight of her

she should enjoy that but it makes her skin crawl

"It is nothing of your concern, princess." Otto sneers and although he stands in front of his grandson, it is not a shield of protection, instead it is one of shame

she takes a step closer and then she smell it

oh

a frown settles on her lips and an instinct to keep him protected emerges

"Come," she commands but neither move

Aegon stiffens and flickers his eyes between the two adults

"Aegon, come, I wish to speak with your mother. She will be pleased."

her hand outstretches and beckons him while Otto provides a firm look

he has always obeyed, he has always seeked approval and yet as he stands, on the verge of a whimper he considers the options

Rhaenyra has never cared much for him, he knows this but even if she were a wild boar, he would take his chances with her more than with his grandsire

he skitters over to her quickly so that Otto cannot argue with him and he takes her hand, suddenly feeling small

the journey is long and tense but she does not let go of his hand, rather she envelopes him into her side like she would Lucerys

"She will not be happy..." Aegon grumbles quietly, worry toiling in him

"Whom?" Rhaenyra's brows pinch

"My mother."

Rhaenyra hums at the clarity

"Then it is a good thing we are not seeing her."

shock engulf his pupils which flit up, his eyes widen

"Th-Then where are we–"

"Your father." She murmurs, bitterness tasting her teeth. "He owes a favour to me." She sighs. He stops instantly and shakes his head, trying to pull away from her.

"No. No. No. No." he refuses, sniffles bridling in his nose "No, he does not wish to see me, no."

"Do you wish for a change of environment or not?" That spins his mind. His breath hitches and he frowns

"What?" He asks in a quiet breath.

"Daemon and I have been lonely as of late," She murmurs despite them both knowing the blanket adjacent lie spilling from her mouth

perhaps it is even sweeter than the wine he loves

"You would...You would have me?" He returns in question. she scans over him, his feeble legs and downcast expression

"You are more than he thinks you are." She states and steps closer. "I did not ask for the crown brought to me and yet I have embraced it. Despite this I would not...I would not allow force to garner our actions. And besides, the boys love you, they would love to see their uncle at all hours."

a soft smile twitches at his lips

"They miss you," she assure, her hand resting on his shoulder

"Really?"

she smiles. "Really."

and so the arrangement is slowly built

he cannot always stay in Dragonstone but he may visit for as long as he wishes and vice verse

though he had to ignore the betrayal lingering in his family's eyeys from time to time, how the embarrassment creeps beneath his skin

and yet riding Sunfyre with Jacaerys at his back is the warmest he has ever felt

he never flushes near Helaena and yet when his nephew beams at him, something unknown stirs

it is not lust, it is warmth

Jacaerys is his warmth and finally Aegon understands why Rhaenyra took charge to dispel his engagement to Helaena so strongly

he has never been happier, never felt more complete

and then Jacaerys presents, an alpha too and eager to protect him too

when they are finally visiting King's Landing and he has never been more excited, sure it is to reaffirm Lucerys' claim to Driftmark but it is no less exciting

he cannot hope but pretend they are coming all this way for him despite his true mind

he prepares himself early, dresses, washes and keeps as well behaved as he's able

Alicent is shocked to say the least but it is pleasant

she thinks that perhaps he is finally ready to be king, perhaps responsibility has finally brought him peace

but alas she watches as he runs to embrace his elder sister and she hardens at the warmth between them

he disobeys her for a woman who would strike him dead at the hint of his claim

Aegon tries to take no notice when later that day, Alicent is digging her nails into his arm

he had beckoned the family over but at the pain twitching his features, Rhaenyra had declined, all too aware of Hightower priorities

Rhaenyra becomes distracted by the ferocity in which she defends her son's claim and Aegon can't help but admire her

it wounds Alicent deeper than any cut

because he cannot understand that she is doing the same

that she is protecting him

then the King seats the throne and Rhaenys confirms her support once Rhaena's betrothal to Lucerys is announced

a sly glimmer flashes in his other nephew's eye however which he cannot discern

and then it happens

his eyes widen and his lips part, a gasp erupting from between them

another betrothal

one for him

without his sister's name and in it's place is Jacaerys

and when they connect eyes, he knows

he knows

that also snaps up his family's attention

even his father's who considers it carefully before agreeing

and that turns a regular family dinner into a betrothal dinner

the first in a long which ends with both comfort and hurt

but it stops a war

Aegon does not need power in his veins to feel the warmth of a dragon and seat a throne

both siblings will have their turn to rule, those who call for bitterness will be removed and those who insult Aegon's status will be punished for questioning

RHAENYRA Taglist: (if your name is in italics and bold, that means i couldn't tag you, you will need to check your settings) @evattude

HOTD Taglist: (if your name is in italics and bold, that means i couldn't tag you, you will need to check your settings) @wrendermedone @hopelesswritergall @its-actually-minicika @gettheetoanunneryimmediatly @adelusionalwriter @cookielovesbook-akie

[eggtartz]

a/n : my baby fever is going insane 😭

masterlist

a morning with kakucho

"papa! papa wake up!" the small figure shooked the man who was snoring. kakucho opened his eyes to see his daughter still in her pyjamas looking excited as ever.

"papa! wake up! mama said she made breakfast and i only get to eat them if you're there!" his daughter pounced on his chest making kakucho groan, noting that her daughter is getting older and heavier everyday. "okay, okay princess im up. you go ahead first while papa go and wash his teeth okay?"

his daughter screeched an okay and ran down the hall to the kitchen while kakucho lazily woke up from the warm bed. it's been eight years into the marriage now and you two had your first daughter for almost seven years now. it's been a long time since kakucho retired from bonten that he wasted no time to propose to you and settled down. life was difficult for the two of you back then considering how kakucho was still paranoid of his surroundings but it became better.

so your first daughter was born.

kakucho washed his face with warm water and took his toothbrush. after that he went to the kitchen where he saw his wife standing at the counter, your daughter at her own chair giggling. kakucho sighed in happiness, at how you two have come a long way and became parents now.

"papa!" your daughter tried reaching out to him while being in her chair that restricted her movements. kakucho close the distance and touched her face, making her giggle more and happily swinging her arms and legs. "now, now settle down you two. let's eat breakfast then we'll go the-"

"park!" your daughter interrupted at the mid of your talk because she was excited to go out. kakucho smiled at his daughter's behavior and sat down at his seat while mumbling a thankyou at you. your baby was about it gobble up her meal until you stopped her. "hold on baby, what do you say to mama when she worked hard to make you breakfast?"

"oh! thankyou mama!" she said and ate her meal hurriedly like a starved man, dirtying her napkin. she finished her meal, well most of it in less than ten minutes. "what's with veggies baby? not gonna touch them?" kakucho gestured to the neglected broccoli on his daughter plate.

"no! veggie bad taste!"

"now, how are you gonna be strong and beat boys when you don't eat your veggies?" kakucho tilted his head while poking the vegetable on her plate. your daughter hesitantly scooped the vegetable and shoved it down her throat, chewing them slowly with a clear frown on her face. "that's my good girl now finish all of them okay?"

"im eating them just to be strong papa! if i eat all of them, i'll be stronger than you!" kakucho laughed at her words, you staring at their interactions in awe. your heart grew warm at this scene that you were blessed with everyday. "mama! today me and papa are gonna do the dirty plates!" your enthusiastic daughter jumped from her chair and dragged her father to the sink while her eyes are silently telling you to go out from the kitchen. "oh okay. i'll take a shower then you two because we'll go the park yes?"

"yup! now shoo mama, me and papa are going to be busy! right papa?" her eyes sparkled and kakucho nodded. your heart melted so you left the kitchen. "okay baby so papa would clean and you would dry. get that?"

"yes!"

"be careful and put the dry dishes here, in this basket okay?"

"yes!"

"are you listening to me baby?"

"yes!" no she wasn't. she was too focused on the bubbles the soap made and her attention was distracted. kakucho laughed again and blew more bubbles from the soap that one of the bubble popped at her nose, making her giggle. kakucho did the dishes and dried them and told her daughter to take a shower.

after an hour or so, you were already done wearing a sundress while kakucho helped your daughter (even though she insisted she wore her dress herself saying she's already grown up). so you three march to the park and your daughter gleefully went to the playground while you two sat on the grass nearby.

"say kakucho, you wanna try having sons after this?" kakucho snapped his head to look at you and blushed without him noticing. "o-oh i thought you're okay with one child?"

"oh it's just she asked me the other day for a brother because she was getting lonely" you reminisce the day your daughter who just came back from kindergarten was helping you with lunch.

"mama? can i ask you something?"

"yes baby what is it?"

"can i have a baby brother?"

"oh? why do say that?"

"oh it's just my friend said she's gonna have a baby brother and i don't know how they look like. so im curious! also, mama said not to waste the toys so if i have a baby brother to play with the toys with, it won't go to waste! right mama?"

you stared at her fidgeting in her special seat while she did her homework "but mama, her mom said that having another baby is painful. i don't want you to be in pain too so if mama doesn't want a baby brother, then it's okay!" she said that cheerfully but you knew your daughter too well and she was a terrible liar. she couldn't hide the disappoinment in her voice also she was averting her gaze, meaning that she doesn't want to cry.

"sure baby, if that's what you want" her teary eyes looked at you and she held a big smile.

"how could i refuse her if she's asks so sweetly like that kakucho?" you two were looking at your daughter who was talking to another kid in the neighborhood.

"okay y/n. i'll support you all the way okay love?" your husband patted your head and kissed your forehead lovingly. you three had a pleasant time that day and only came home when your daughter was knocked out in exhaustion.

[bookinit02]

just read the episode seven script. HOLY FUCKING SHIT DUDW

there is . so much. SO MUCH i want to say about it. so many great moments. oh my god. final girl karen wheeler my QUEEN. and the camp scene at the end, witg all the reunions- mr. clark!!! lucas and his parents!!! KALI!!! god im SO EXCITED to see what you do with kali man, i loved that part of season 2 and kind of hated how she was just...never mentioned again... and seeing her in your season 5 makes me so happy!!!!

and now to scream about byler.

*deep breath* .. ASJFBFKFNWIJDKDBFJFBIDBDJD DHHDJDVDJDBDJDHD HEHVDJDBDKDHDIDBJDBDJDBEJEHDJ

HOLY SHIT!!!! THE LETTERS. TYE FCUKGIN LETTERSSSSSZSSS. THAT. THE. MIKE. READING THE LETTER TO WILL. "i dont know how to love people without hurting them" DEAR GOD. AND THEY FINALLY KISSED!!!!!!! IN THE RUINS OF CASTLE BYERS!!!!! AND IT LITERALLY FUCKINNG RESTORES THE UPSIDE DOWN!!!!!! LIKE FUCKING MLP TWILIGHT SPARKLE MAGIC POWER STYLE!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!

also on that note . i loveloveLOVE how you did the hive mind flashback to before henry showed up, i LOVE the notion that the upside down wasnt always creepy and evil and thats all henry's doing, i LOVE the demodogs and demogorgons being real, sympathetic creatures rather than these mindless drones for the Good Guys to kill. doggie!!!! theyre just doggies!!!! im!!!!!!!!!

clears throat. anyways

YES final girl karen wheeler!! i am so glad everyone is starting to care about her as much as i do bc i have had this plotline in my head for over a year now🥹

actually. confession! karen’s plot was like 80% of the reason i decided to do a script at all, bc i had such a solid s5 vision in my head for her but i couldn’t figure out how to work it into a byler-pov fic. i was thinking about doing separate related ficlets originally, but then i got even more ideas, and the scripts were born!

and yeah, i’m super excited about all the reunions!! i was going to wait for the finale until some of them, like mr. clark, but i figured i’d just get them all done in one big reunion extravaganza. the plan was always to include kali somehow—i want to make sure i close out the arcs of all characters in the show, like terry and the police, etc! and el needs her sister back💗

i’m glad you liked the letter scene :) it’s one of my favorites, and i’m very happy with how it turned out.

thank you so so so much for the comment about the hive mind (and for your notes on the fic as well)! i know that understandably this chapter got overshadowed very much by byler, but the restoration/decolonization of the upside down is a really important theme to me, and i’m looking forward to writing it out. especially because (and i could be wrong about this) it’s not a route that i necessarily see the duffers taking, and i wanted to be able to do it justice.

thank you for the comment!!!! sorry for the long reply, i just woke up from a nap and apparently i had a lot to say😭

[euphoricfilter]

hi honeybun i’m back!! i’ve been on depression shit and i fucked up ny sleeping schedule again (only bc i’ve been getting high every day which i normally don’t to sigh) but just wanted to say hi to my fav<3 recently it became colder where i am and it’s just making me wanna cuddle with all seven gorgeous men, but hobi just would be the coziest <3 i saw a lil video promo for his doc and he just looked so fluffy and cute. wanna hold him !! you probs have already answered this but i’m a bit new so i wanna know, who’s ur bias in the group? for me it’s namjoonie but the rap line has my entire heart<333 ofc i luv all of them evenly but my babies :((( also i declared tae to be my twin flame only bc we are literally born a day apart (on a calendar basis he’s like a few years older than me lmao) but i just luv capricorn men so much and we have some sort of the same personality we r basically the same!!!! jk and jimin are my babygirls they r so cute :,))) and as for jin, the man is too beautiful i would just stare at him he intimidates me sm i would be like pls have mercy on me. i would literally be this emoji 😦 if i ever saw him !!!! gonna go dive into some fluff bc im feeling a bit down and then head to sleep soon bc it’s 5:20 am for me and i haven’t slept so gn/gm bae <333 luv u sm :D-🌙

omg you’re back!!!!! honestly me too 😭 since i’ve been visiting my friend i think my sleep schedule has been wonky but alas i’m still alive, i was slowly teetering on the edge of a depressive episode a couple of weeks and and i just 🧍‍♀️somehow pulled through and i’ve been doing okay recently

fave? babes you’ll give me a massive ego, i’m simply existing

koreas been colder than shanghai has been recently but it’s not unbearable so i don’t mind it, yesterday was pretty nice considering how cold it was when i first got here

i saw the documentary video teaser, hobi’s so cool i wanna levitate 🫶 i’m really excited to his creative process, and how he like organized the album, kept up with the schedules for it, just like a deeper dive into jack in the box and what happened behind the scenes, i always find stuff like that really interesting

noo it’s okay, i think i’ve only mentioned it once like ages ago, idk if it’s obvious by everything i reblog but i’m jungkook biased 🫶 that man can get it, there’s no way a man should be that pretty and get away with it, like i want to be him. i could write a whole thesis about why i love that man and why everyone in the world should love him too and he’s so pretty star cutie 🫶

namjoon is 100% my comfort person, i see him and i just ☹️ words aren’t enough to explain how much i adore his existence, if namjoon had to be an emotion then it would either be comfort or reassurance, simply having him there is reassuring enough that you’re doing okay, that simply living is enough and by some weird miracle, he doesn’t know what we all look like but you feel seen 🫶 anyways i love joonie too i just 🫶🫶🫶🫶 if i could only ever say one thing to him i think it would be thank you

idk which members count as compatible? is that the right word, with my star sign. i know me and hobi are both born in february but that’s it 😭

jungkook is the personification of the word baby girl, you can’t tell me otherwise, there’s just something in the way he holds himself that screams baby girl and i love him so much 😭

me if i ever happened to be in the same room as jin 🧍‍♀️

i literally wouldn’t even know what to do with myself except run in the opposite direction

i hope you feel a little better later!!! and have a good day <3

MWAH 🫂🫂 ily <3

[c0smiccom3t]

Ladies and gentlemen, it is by craft-tastic pleasure that i am gonna present to you all................ my Sackboy AU..........

SACKBOY & SACKGIRL: Adventures in Craftworld!

Now, before we get started, allow me to tell all of you something... which is...

THE STORY

The story takes place after the events of LBP and SABA, Where after getting the title as the protector of Craftworld and a knitted knight, Sackboy must face the challenges of being a knitted knight, with the help of his sister, Sackgirl! But the story... also foretells, The return of Vex. (That's right he's back and with a lair of his own and a crazy lovesick assistant, but also with the help of a familiar villain from LBP3...) It's up to the siblings to make sure they help everybody in need and stop Vex from taking over Craftworld and make it into a land of uproar!

THE CHARACTERS

Now that we know the story, it's time to meet the characters! The heroes AND the villains!

Everybody in Craftworld have got goals, some are craft-tastic and harmless, while other goals (The bad ones)... well, they can be VERY malicious and villainous. and our heroes' goal is to overcome the obstacles of knitted knights. While the villains try to make craftworld a land of uproar AND/OR absorve it's creativity and keep it for themself. Now, let's go meet our heroes, shall we?

SACKBOY

Sackboy is the protector of Craftworld and a Knitted Knight. This little autistic fellow is always up for adventure. But sometimes he can really use some help. He does not speak, however, he can speak sign language. When someone is in danger, you can count on him and his sister Sackgirl to save the day!

SACKGIRL

Sackgirl is Sackboy's sister and Knitted Knight sidekick. She's pretty smart and challenging. Always up for a challenge to foil Vex's plans and to drink some smoothies. She, with Sackboy, always try to find a way out of trouble and to solve problems all around Craftworld. She also tries to keep everybody (especially her brother) safe from evil. Even though she's just a knitted knight beginner, she has the dreams to become one just like her brother.

Headcanon Voice: Polly from Powerbirds (Voiced by Tara Strong)

Scarlet

Sackboy and Sackgirl's mentor. The last remaining knitted knight who is also a maternal figure to our heroes. she sometimes gets excited of telling stories, but she's also a very wise, confident and brave woman who always teaches the siblings on being a knitted knight. She plans to go on adventures on her own, but also going on expeditions with Sackboy and Sackgirl.

Voiced by: Dawn French (who also voices her in the original SABA game)

Now that we met the heroes, i think it's time we meet their adversaries... the VILLAINS! Starting from....

VEX

Oh, dont tell me you don't recognize him! You know, god of nightmares, master of the uproar, bringer of chaos, LIFE OF THE PARTY! the two heroes' arch-nemesis. This near-mythical being born of chaos and fear once turned Craftworld into a land of uproar but then Sackboy stopped him and turned everything back to normal. But now, he's BACK and even more evil than ever. This selfish, greedy, mean, narcissistic, regal and dastardly royal git plans to transform craftworld into a world of uproar. with new various inventions and a crazy assistant (and a scientific henchman), he is always up to destroy sackboy and take over as craftworld's new lord. Of course, he can be silly and a bit clumsy sometimes but he still has hopes to defeat his enemy and rule over craftworld.

Voiced by: Richard E. Grant (who also voices him in the original SABA game)

STITCHER

Stitcher is Vex's assistant of chaos. Was once a sackling living in the village of Loom. But once Vex showed up, he joined his side after he was defeated by Sackboy and changed into this crazy, diabolical, lovesick bad guy who loves Chaos, Destruction, and most importantly... VEX! (yes, he's got a huge crush on him.) he always helps Vex to destroy sackboy and sackgirl and turn craftworld into a land of uproar. He's always a fan of what Vex does and he sincerely admires him very much. He can build machines and uses his hammer "Slappy" as a weapon to use his attacks (especially bomb related ones). He can be very sassy, energetic, crazy and most importantly, mischevious. he can be nice sometimes but he refuses to give up his role in villainy. He has a big sister but he prefers not to talk about her much often. But either way, yes, he's crazy about Vex (and Vex has a secret huge crush on him too...) keep scrolling.

Headcanon voice: Junkrat from Overwatch (Voiced by Chris Parson)

NEWTON

Newton is Vex's new Scientist Henchman who works aside Stitcher as his P.I.U (Partner In Uproar). He was forced by Vex to join by his side to destroy sackboy. Despite many attempts of refusing. He gave up and got Vexed as he joined the villain team. He can be foolish and not very smart but is highly intelligent. Despite this, he tends to accept unearned credit and even comes off as a bit narcissistic. Especially when he's a bit jealous of Vex. But he's also a huge papa's boy and a crybaby who tried to impress his father by releasing the titans back then. But, he failed and in the end got... you know, some ouchies in his bum-bum. He sometimes hates Stitcher's guts when he is making fun of him and calling him: "Nerd-ton" and "Papa's boy". Despite working for Vex, his goal is to absorb all of Craftworld's creativity and become the imagisphere greatest creator. But that doesn't happen because how bratty Vex can be when it comes to conquer Craftworld. sometimes he can throw a few fits. But not as much as Vex does. But yeah, get ready imagisphere. NEWTON'S BACK AND lamer MORE BRILLIANT THAN EVER!

Voiced by: Hugh Laurie (who voices him in the original LBP 3 game)

Now that we have met the heroes and the villains, i think it's time we go for...

THE AU'S INSPIRATIONS

Remember one time i said that the au was gonna be like a preschool/saturday morning kids cartoon? Well, it's true! It is! So, here's some inspirations behind it. You might have watched or heard of these, if you havent watched them, please do.

Due to it's charming character designs and stories, Powerbirds is the AU's biggest inspiration. If you havent watched this already, please do, it's really good!

4 words. Brilliant action & comedy. plus, the fourth wall breaks in the show are absolutely amazing. To be honest im planning to watch this again in the future, but most of all, the villain scenes in this show are amazing and funny as well! (im looking at you, Dr. Eggman.)

sadly i cant add anymore images so allow me to put in a list.

-Starbeam

-LazyTown

-Onegai My Melody

-H.R PufnStuf

-Pac-Man and the Ghostly Adventures

and most importantly...

-OK KO LETS BE HEROES!

So yes. this is it for this master post. So, get ready for adventures full of suspense, surprises, uproar but most importantly, DREAMS!

BONUS: Theme songs

Sleepyhead - Passion Pit (from the LBP 2 soundtrack)

Living Island - Pogo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3HWG3h-IARU

[cazimagines]

After seeing @toobruhlforschool post the article, I had to translate it!

English translation by google translate below the cut

Daniel Brühl tried for the first time as a director - and he succeeds very well. His debut “next door” (in theaters July 15th) is full of black humor about how embarrassing, tricky and exhausting it can be to be a famous actor. Especially when you meet a neighbor in the corner bar in a Berlin neighborhood, played by Peter Kurth , who obviously hates you. The story is based on Brühl's idea, and very vaguely on his own experiences, from which the writer Daniel Kehlmann draws("Measuring the World") has made a script in which the price of fame is demonstrated with relish. In addition, allusions to Daniel Brühl himself are hidden in the film, who not only directed the film, but also plays the protagonist, a famous actor, in “next door”. Brühl, who last worked in the international Marvel series “The Falcon and the Winter Soldier” , speaks in an interview about what made him decide to make this story into a film and how to approach such a project.

Interview with Daniel Brühl: About the price of being in public and the success of projects

Mr. Brühl, in your directorial debut you investigate the price a successful actor pays for being in public. Why did you want to do this film?

One topic I've always been interested in is gentrification. The initial spark was an observation I made in Barcelona. That was about ten years ago. I moved to the city for a while. That made me very proud, because I've always felt very connected to Barcelona, ​​I was born there and finally wanted to say: “I'm a Barcelonian now”.

Instead, did you attract attention because the actor Daniel Brühl was recognized?

No, I just acted very silly, always walking through the streets with my key fob to show that I don't live in a hotel, I'm from here now, then I always talked loudly to the people in the market where Street, via FC Barcelona et cetera. Then I always enjoyed going to such a lunch spot and one day there was a crusher in front of me, such a real edge, and looked at me piercingly without blinking. Forever long. Like Clint Eastwood.

Just like in your film a man from the neighborhood, played by Peter Kurth, who takes on an actor who is very similar to you.

Yes, with the man in Barcelona back then, I immediately felt that he couldn't take me. As I sit there with my trolley suitcase, just flown in from Berlin. The jet set that somehow rattles around loudly with the waiters, makes each other mean and wants to please. That totally exposed me. Then my imagination started. I thought it was a scaffolding builder who had been able to look into our apartment from a construction site for months and now wants to confront me with everything he knows about me.

How do you relate this story to gentrification?

There is such a constant feeling that you are not to blame for gentrification but are part of the process. I've been dealing with this since I've lived in Berlin and I noticed it again in Barcelona. Then the mind game started that an actor, someone who is in public, offers a completely different surface to attack.

How do you translate that feeling into a project?

I enjoyed the way such a person was approached in a masochistic way. As he is told, “I found your film poop. I think you shit as an actor. " Then I moved the story to Berlin, the East-West topic was added, but at some point I realized that I couldn't write it alone and approached Daniel Kehlmann. He could do something with it immediately. While we were writing we noticed how much more was there. That was around the time some public careers were collapsing. That was an interesting component, people who outwardly have perfect lives, whose careers are ruined by rumors that come out about them.

Which personalities are you thinking of?

Well, of course the case of Kevin Spacey, the very different case of Harvey Weinstein. There have been many cases, some of them based on real crimes. It became an interesting topic for me because I wanted to play someone who would completely lose himself in his career and then be held up in the mirror.

If so much of you went into the script, why is Daniel Kehlmann the only one who has the credit and you don't?

There are so many Daniels. At some point I just felt uncomfortable reading my name so often. In addition, Daniel Kehlmann did the most on the script. I couldn't have made the film without him. That a Kammerspiel (From what I learnt in my film studies, Kammerspiel is a certain type of German cinema) remains exciting for over 90 minutes depends on the dialogues and they mainly come from him. I was a sparring partner who fed him ideas.

You have had a veritable career as an actor for over 25 years, appearing in blockbusters and playing a leading role in an international Netflix series. Then that's a fundamental step in deciding whether to direct. How do you manage to take such a new path?

You can't take a quick shot. I've been waiting for the right time, but you can't let it pass. That's what happens when you're too scared, too respectful. At some point you have to trust yourself. Now that I've done it for the first time, my humility towards directing is even greater. I consciously wanted to do something small. I would not have believed myself capable of certain other substances. Then I would have the feeling that I am falling out.

How do you know that you are on the right track and that you can get started with a project?

If an idea remains interesting for you after long deliberation and reflection, and does not suddenly become stupid or boring, you can ask yourself whether this idea is reasonable, i.e. whether you trust yourself to implement it. I knew this was a world and that there were characters - I just know my way around that. If you are also lucky enough to be able to set up a good team, then you are on the right track. It is of course a total luxury that someone like Daniel Kehlmann has promised me to write this. Peter Kurth replied with a handwritten letter within 24 hours. We met and hugged in his local pub.

The role actors and actresses play in public is not only the topic of your film, but was also discussed in the course of the #allesdichtmachen campaign, a campaign against the measures taken by the federal government to contain the corona pandemic. Were you also asked about this?

I was actually not asked, but I know many of those involved. I wanted to stay out of this heated Shitstorm number and clarified that privately with those I know. I not only found the action unsuccessful, but also the counter-action excessive and absurd. I can see that in many areas at the moment, how quickly such a thermal rises, which is toxic. That's a bit of the theme of the film.

Then again quickly an easier topic: What is the most absurd thing that has ever happened to you as a public person?

Haha, a scene that also made it into the movie. In Barcelona a couple came up to me in a park, two blondes, with a camera in their hand. It was immediately clear to me that they were Germans and they wanted a photo with me. I instinctively put my arm around the woman. They were Swedes, of course, who didn't recognize me at all, but wanted me to take a photo of them. It was so embarrassing and even more terrible than in the film because then I started to explain in English “You know, I'm a famous actor…” The way they looked at me! Haha, that was one of those moments when you notice how you blush. Well then I think I could tell you about embarrassment for an hour.

[l000ey]

mamas 2019, pt. 1 ━ venus

𝑷𝑨𝑰𝑹𝑰𝑵𝑮 ━ 𝗆𝗈𝗈𝗇 𝖽𝖺𝖾𝗌𝗈𝗎𝗅 𝗑 𝗂𝗆 𝗃𝖺𝖾𝖻𝗎𝗆 ( 𝖿𝗍. 𝗆𝖺𝗆𝖺𝗆𝗈𝗈, 𝖺𝗋𝖺𝖻𝖾𝗅𝗅𝖺 𝗅𝖾𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗋𝗈𝗌𝖾𝖺𝗇𝗇𝖾 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗄 )

𝑺𝑼𝑴𝑴𝑨𝑹𝒀 ━ 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝟤𝟢𝟣𝟫 𝗆𝖺𝗆𝖺𝗌 𝗐𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖺 𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝗓𝗒

𝑾𝑨𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺 ━ 𝗋𝗈𝗌𝖾́ 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺 𝗉𝗌𝗒𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖺𝗍𝗁 𝖻𝗂𝗍𝖼𝗁, 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗋𝗒 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗆, 𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗌𝖾𝗑

𝑨/𝑵 ━ 𝗂 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝖽 𝗂 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗀𝗈𝗇𝗇𝖺 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖿𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖽𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝖺𝗀𝗈, 𝗂'𝗆 𝗌𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝖺 𝖿𝖺𝗂𝗅𝗎𝗋𝖾 𝗈𝗆𝗀

𝒀𝑬𝑨𝑹 ━ 𝟤𝟢𝟣𝟫

• 𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘶𝘴’ 𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵

A feeling of excitement and euphoria ran through the place, the glitters of the idols' expensive clothes decorated the city of Nagoya, and the screams of the fans, excited to see their favorite artists perform. But Moon Daesoul didn't feel that but a great pressure and anxiety that made her hand tighten more and more against Hwasa's. She didn't want to attend the awards, but because she hadn't told anyone what happened that night she had no choice but to smile and nod like she was a sweet and silly girl.

She rolled her eyes, erasing her tight, fake smile as they escaped the flashes of the paparazzi on the carpet. Hwasa's hand was still trapped in her grip as they walked into the stadium ━rather laughing at the wig that Solar would have to wear for the performance━, she remained quiet until they reached their seats for the night watching the toes of her heels appear and disappear as they walked, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone.

She listened as Wheein thanked the staff girl who guided them as she sat down. She did a quick visual inspection and sighed in relief, at least Exo hadn't come. Her eyes met Storm's, who moved her eyebrows in her direction in a playful way at her making her eyes roll.

"Well, place your bets" Byul spoke attracting the attention of the four, who looked at her curiously although the curiosity faded as their eyes fell on Dae "Will something happen between JB and Vee or will they just look at each other like every damn event?" The tired and annoyed tone that she used to pronounce the last sentence made Wheein laugh, her laugh was accompanied by an exaggerated gesture that expressed the annoyance of the members every time the former couple starred for a moment from afar.

Immediately her body stiffened. They didn't know about Baekhyun, they didn't know that she was almost in a relationship with the Exo singer, but most of all, they didn't know about that night. Guilt returned to fill her body when the words and thoughts made a knot in her stomach and went up her throat wanting to come out of her in the form of vomit. She swallowed hard, diverting her gaze from her sisters, who were looking at her waiting for an answer.

“Maybe something will happen, but with someone else.” The leader's words reached her ears making her frown, but she still didn't look.

Hwasa gave her a light blow on the arm "Explain".

"I heard that a member of that new group, Ateez I think their name is, he is a very fan of our Venus" She raised her eyebrows and the girls laughed sounding like schoolgirls when they saw the boy they liked although to Dae they sounded more like old ladies bored with their husbands and gossiping about the misfortunes of others.

"Most of the members of that group were born in 99, I don't think Vee likes them so young." The other rapper denied skeptically, she was a fan of Jaedae.

Before any of them could answer the lights went out and the screaming increased. Venus smiled, she wouldn't have to hear them anymore until they had to go backstage or win an award.

Which happened eventually. She sighed before giving a staff boy a smile as he helped her down the stairs from the stage that led backstage. She looked at her groupmates before approaching Solar, touched her shoulder to get her attention.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom, see you in the dressing room" The leader nodded, checking her with a worried look.

"Are you okay?" Venus nodded and gave her a small smile before handing the headphones and microphone to the staff, she headed to the bathroom giving some smile and bows to the idols she was meeting on her way to her destiny.

Shit.

She froze when she saw Got7 coming in her way, she looked down at her shoes to avoid making eye contact with any of them. She smiled in relief as she managed to enter the bathroom, her smile growing even wider when she saw that it was empty. She went to a cubicle but before she could open it a hand of her pulled her, alarmed she turned around.

Double shit.

She almost fainted when she saw the boy in front of her, she opened her eyes and pushed him away from her body. Her eyes moved to the door before looking back at him "Are you an idiot?! What are you doing here? If anyone sees us━“.

"We have to talk, it will only be a second" He interrupted her. The girl began to move her leg up and down, nervous about the situation.

"I don't want to talk, Jaebum" She took his arm in her hands to start pushing him towards the door.

"We have to talk about what happened, Vee." He put his feet on the ground making it impossible for her to move him. She snorted moving behind him to push him by the back but still he didn't move, he was so much stronger than her.

"God, someday you're going to kill me" She clenched her jaw and frustrated she moved away from him, she had no choice but to listen to him. She would let him speak, he would leave, and she would empty her bladder.

"I-I have sent you messages and I have even called you" He turned around to see her better, she looked at him with no expression other than annoyance.

"I know".

"You have not answered".

"I know".

JB dropped his head in defeat, this girl really got on his nerves when she got stubborn.

"Is that all you had to say? Well goodbye!" She tried again to push him but, again, she failed.

The long-haired boy placed his hands over hers that were positioned on his chest, the rapper swallowed hard when he looked at her.

"I can't stop thinking about that night" That's it, he said it. An awkward silence entered the bathroom, both former lovers looked into each other's eyes without being able to move their gaze from each other. Without knowing how or when, Moon's back met the wall of one of the cubicles while her tongue fought against the Im, her legs were wrapped around his waist and his hands traveled all over her body in fast and clumsy movements, excited to get around every curve again.

He moaned into her mouth when her hands met his hair and she smiled, forgetting that they were in a public bathroom in a building with millions of cameras and eyes that would benefit quite a bit from the scene. They were so focused on each other that they didn't even realize that two more presences had entered the room.

"How many times do I have to tell you? It was just sex, for God's sake!" A raspy but feminine voice made both of them stop the kiss, still tangled they looked at each other in panic. Venus was grateful that they closed the cubicle door.

"But I love you, Arabella!" The girl widened her eyes when she heard the name of her friend while Jaebum raised an eyebrow, curious.

"Fucking hell, I don't want to have anything with you" The BTS member made a face of disgust when the other girl got too close to her, took a couple of steps back raising a hand to not hit the wall and be cornered but in instead she pushed the door of the same cubicle in which both lovers were hiding, let's say they had not closed the door very well since it was opened revealing the other two idols in a very compromising situation. Arabella frowned when she saw how Rosé's face twitched in shock "What now?."

"Bells" Hearing the new voice, the italian made a little jump in her place before turning and seeing her two friends.

She pressed her full lips together causing them to disappear into a fine line "Shit".

Before anyone could say or do anything a flash and the "click" of a camera echoed throughout the bathroom, panic quickly filled the former couple's body as Lee turned around again to look at Blackpink's singer smirking at her as she moved her phone in her hands.

"Rosé, give me the phone."

"Come back with me and I will not publish the photo" The little girl pointed to the two older people in the room, who had already separated and left the cubicle "You don't want your friends' lives to go to hell do you?"

"This happens to me for having sex with virgins" She murmured to herself before giving the girl a wry smile "Am i that good in bed? because jesus, I don't think you want to date someone like me. "

"One click and it will be all over Naver" She unlocked her phone causing Venus to raise her hands to stop her.

"No, please" She begged, kneeling before her, her tears threatening to fall from her eyes. Jaebum walked over to her to pick her up.

The other rapper tensed her jaw seeing how her friend began to cry in the man's arms, she sighed in defeat.

"Okay, okay, I'll do what you want but delete the fucking photo" The singer smiled widely, this time the smile was a happy one before approaching the tallest one and planting a kiss on her lips.

"I'll erase it when you take me on a date, babe." She giggled sweetly when Arabella tried to grab her arm but she was faster than her and managed to avoid her before leaving the bathroom.

"Fottuta puttana" She cursed in a murmur with her gaze still on the bathroom door.

On the other hand, the couple was still holding each other, Venus cried on JB's chest while he stroked her hair and murmured in her ear trying to calm her down.

The girl looked at them with pity, went over to the sink and washed her lips trying to remove any trace of that manipulative bitch. She made eye contact with the boy through the mirror, gave a quick look at the girl in his arms and sighed wiping hdf hands "Go, I'll call Hwasa and tell her that she feels bad, my manager will take her to my house and keep her company. When this shit is over go there, we will talk about this."

After thinking about it for a few seconds, the black-haired man nodded before making the girl in her arms look at him, he placed his hands on her cheeks and wiped the tears that slid down her cheeks with his thumbs. He gave her a sad smile "I'm so sorry, Vee."

He kissed her forehead before releasing her and leaving the room.

[percedurza]

I HAVE ALREADY SPOKE ON LENGTH ABOUT THE PRINCE OF EGYPT BUT NOT THE WHOLE THING ONLY THE PLAGUES AND MOSTLY PASSOVER. I JUST WATCHED THE FULL MOVIE FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE I WAS A KID IM GONNA TALK ABOUT IT AGAIN BECAUSE IT WAS SO GOOD. OKAY.

okay let me first say that i was in tears within the first ten minutes of the movie. deliver us was so powerful and heartbreaking i cried BEFORE THE TEN MINUTE MARK. yeah.

when moses' mother sang her final lullaby to her son and pushed him downstream in that (blessed and very fortunate) basket my heart hurt. i cried with her. that was the last time she would ever see her baby.

when his sister sang her prayer for her baby brother, wishing for him to come back to deliver them as well, that just drove the nail in harder.

in a later scene before the banquet you can hear moses humming that last lullaby and since deliver us was just maybe ten minutes prior you remember it and realize he really did keep that final song.

and the banquet oh yeah ramesses gets appointed this big title? and he names moses as the grand architect

and theres this captured hebrew lady brought in for ramesses but shes fierce (i would be too, she was captured and brought to the people she hates the most) and so ramesses orders her to be brought to moses' chambers instead

moses goes to his chambers and suprise! she escaped! moses chases after and sees her sneaking out with her camel and distracts some guards so she wont get caught and once the guards are gone he goes after her again aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand

miriam (moses' sister) meeting him in the city streets and recognizing him, telling him he's her family and him shutting her down and calling her a slave.... it hurt. when she hums that lullaby and he RECOGNIZES and then rushes back home to have a dream about that day he was sent away (in beautiful animation designed to look like the hieroglyphs on his wall) its all so painful to watch him be forced out of nowhere to realize his life is a LIE because hes not a true prince of egypt, he's born of the slaves, and then his father the pharaoh justifies the order to slaughter innocent babies by saying "they were just slaves" and OUGH

moses kills a man. unintentional but he killed a man while trying to stop him from beating a slave. oops.

he cant live with this so he runs away into the desert. theres this scene where he collapses to the ground and sheds all of the jewelry and adornments from his life as royalty but as he takes off the ring ramesses gives him, he looks at it. and slowly puts it back on. because no matter what, he still loves his brother, and he always will.

moses falls into a well. yeah. chases off some ruffians and then basically faints and falls in. these girls the ruffians were harassing started pulling him out and SURPRISE SURPRISE the captured lady from the banquet is there and she drops him back in when she recognizes him and walks away all smug and her name is tzipporah! just an fyi (very pretty name love it)

moses basically gets adopted into the group of hebrews and moses says something about not ever having done anything of worth and so tzipporah's father jethro sings a little tune to him!

through heavens eyes is a masterpiece. i really dont know what else to say also i want jethro to be my dad hes so nice

aaanyway moses and tzipporah get married during the through heavens eyes montage! i just think thats nice

OKAY now juicy stuff the BURNING BUSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the scene in which moses encounter the burning bush and god.

god claims that he has seen his people (the hebrew slaves) suffering and cannot stand for it any longer, so he wishes to send moses as a sort of ambassador of god

and moses doesnt think hes worthy of being god's messenger, which god quickly shuts up by pointing out how he's kind of, like, GOD

and he teaches moses those big old words, "LET MY PEOPLE GO" wahoo!!!!!!

he rushes home to tell tzipporah, and shes like "but ur just one dude" and hes like "well i kinda have to also the hebrews are suffering in slavery so :////"

tzipporah and moses head on over to meet ramesses and theyre all excited to see each other and then moses is like "behold the power of god!!!!!!" and his staff becomes a snake. pretty gnarly if i do say so myself

and then the high priests are like "ok" and start basically performing and rapping the names of the egyptian gods at moses in response i really dont know how to describe it but its basically a whole lotta smoke and mirrors. not actual miracles

moses talks to ramesses and asks him to let his people go, and instead doubles the slave's workload. the slaves basically hate moses now because yeah he technically is the reason theyre getting pushed harder and even his own brother aaron seems to loathe him. miriam talks to moses and he sees ramesses' ship gliding down the nile nearby

he calls out to ramesses and he just sends his guards after him. and so moses brings the staff down and turns the river to blood.

THEN THE REST OF THE PLAGUES ENSUE!!!

theres this specific part of the plagues scene in which ramesses stands between two statues of egyptian gods and glances at them as if to ask why the fuck arent they doing anything about the LITERAL hellfire and general havoc being brought down on the city. just thought that was a really cool detail.

AND OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH passover. i really shouldnt get excited about talking about an event that killed a whole heck ton of kids but its like fnaf at this point who cares ANYWAY THE DEAD KIDS

i already talked about the passover scene but what i didnt include (i think) is how when god's spirit or whatever idk enters the palace, it passes over a statue of ramesses and you just think, oh fuck wait RAMESSES HAD A SON.

and sure enough, that son is dead. moses walks in as ramesses pulls a sheet over his sons dead body and ramesses finally, after all of the plagues, tells moses he can take the hebrews and leave.

as moses walks away you can see ramesses glare at moses because he may have said he was done but. hes not. of course.

moses and the hebrews are leaving with yet another beautiful musical sequence (when you believe) and you can see the hordes of former slaves walking to the sea.

AAND just like i said RAMESSES WASNT FINISHED! he brings a whole bunch of soldiers on horseback and chases the hebrews, and god literally rains fire on them again this time in the form of a flaming tornado that sweeps across the sand, making a big old wall of fire that the egyptian soldiers cant get through

which gives moses the time to do the famous parting of the sea. he brings that staff down in the water and DOES GODS WONDERS!!! yay!!!

watching them walk on the seabed was beautiful. with some lightning strikes you could see the silhouette of some kind of shark swimming in the water (looked it up there are sometimes whale sharks in the red sea this is accurate)

and the fire tornado recedes into the earth, the fire fades, the soldiers chase on at ramesses' orders. the water sweeps them away just as the hebrews make it to the other side and it later cuts back to ramesses, alone on the rocky shore, screaming out at moses. hes completely alone, soldiers presumably dead, and no family to speak of. his side of the sea is cloudy and gloomy, still stormy, but when it jumps back to the hebrews in celebration, the sun shines bright and happy. the hebrews are free.

the movie ends with moses walking down the mountain sinai, ten commandments in hand, while the last snippet of deliver us plays once again.

only one other movie has evoked this much of this kind of emotion in me.(the one movie is klaus LMAO klaus made me ugly cry) there was not a single second of watching this that i didnt have goosebumps.

the movie itself just looks pretty. all of the characters have unique and neat designs. (its also nice to see a movie with only poc in it like im just saying)

the musical scores and numbers are so expertly made. my favorite has to be deliver us but through heavens eyes is a very close second. through heavens eyes made me feel better about myself, in a way. the entire movie was like some healing experience.

all in all, this is an S tier movie, and i BEG BEG BEG anyone who hasn't seen it to watch it. just pirate it or something (i did lol watched it on an illegal streaming site)

if you're not religious and havent seen it, think of it as a chance to learn more about abrahamic faiths. if you are religious and havent seen it, well hey! here you go!!

[mostlikelyshutup]

thoughts while watching the first harry potter:

listen i started this list a little late im ngl but notable thoughts so far are me thinking of dumbledore as a gay idiot and still loving hagrid

do you think hes speaking in parseltongue in the zoo when hes speaking to the snake

forgot boats existed

these idiots do scream a lot dont they

i forgot how light hearted this universe really is in the first couple movies

yer a wizard harry, okay hagrid maybe slide him into it a little better

we get it tuney you have fucking trauma, doesnt mean you should abuse a child

hasnt everyone had their name down since they were born, hagrid? theres a list

i like that his umbrella is pink

are you paying for those damages hargid? stop taking the door off the hinges

though, if the dursleys are, keep breaking shit

speaking about dragons on the the fucking tube, its a miracle harry didnt get in trouble with the ministry sooner

what is hagrid's usual? does anyone know???

fucking Quirrell, cant wait for your epic love story with the dark lord

maybe we should tell the 12 year old how the fuck everyone knows his name, just maybe

they do a great job of getting the wonder down pat

how much money and licensing do you think it took for them to get all these owls on set

ahh yes, antisemitism the bank

how many vaults are in gringotts?? also if harry's vault is the potters vault, a literal like sacred 28 family, one of the original families, and its number 600 something, how many were there before the potters?? did the potters get a vault recently? or is this james and lily's vault?? how rich were james and lily if so??

look at ollivander, crazy tinker uncle, love him

this might be the socialist in me but why do people have to pay for wands if everyone needs one??

why is the dark lords twin wand just sitting around on the shelf, ollie me boy??

do you think thats Harry's true wand or do you think thats because of the horcux thing?? do you harry had to get another wand after he died?? did he? i dont remember the last movie

is ollie me boys actor wearing contacts or are his eyes just like that??

thats a very weird way of showing Halloween 81, very misleading

hagrid said ill predict voldys rise in the first movie so we can have some plot development

hagrid is late to everything isnt he? i can feel it in my bones

i swear ive seen these movies, and ive even read the first book, i just dont remember shit

youd think theyd have someone in the know stationed close to the entrance for the platform, for any muggleborns

ginnys actress really had no fucking lines in this movie did she, just had to stand there

oh wait she said good luck

amazing work ginny

ooh a warm filter

can muggles see the express? like just running from london to scotland

wicked!

you didnt have to show the woman the sad sandwich ron

i think the trolly replenishes magically, i think thats how thats how that works, i want to believe that

god i cant tell if i would love or hate hermione, shes pretentious but so was i at that age

god dont fucking point your wand right in someones face mione

how does mione know who harry is?? why does she care?

look at the tiny first years, might just go and pinch theyre cheeks

MINNIEEEE i love you minnie

looking stunning minnie, the green brings out the sternness in your brow

you go minnie, give your speech, thats my head of house

shut up draco, youre not bond

you pretentious fuckwit, your hair is brassy anyways

if this is a class of kids born in the middle of a war, how big are the usual class sizes wtf

THE FUCKING CLAP

fucking propaganda ron, you slytherin hater

what order are these names going in, did they just randomized the list

oooh we get quiet for the boy who lived, jesus let him keep living

the fact that for the rest of these people its just silent is so fucking funny to me, Harry's just fucking whispering to himself

get their attention minnie

me dads a muggle, mums a witch, bit of a shock for him when he found out

NICK, love to see you buddy

i have no emotional attachment to peeves but i feel i should mention him here

the stairs still piss me off, why the fuck would you make moving stair cases

who sets out gloves for the next day? am i the weird one who doesnt??

Minnie, you are the love of my life

shut up snape you dramatic bloodpurist incel

i know theyre setting him up to be mistaken as the villain but jesus christ hes still an asshole

your robes Neville, you forgot your robes

its weird how they have to learn all these latin charms yet only have to say up to get their brooms to work

why wont you go after him, hes obviously not exactly in control, Hooch

does Hooch only teach first years? she is quite literally the equivalent of a history teacher who coaches football

what the fuck is Quirells classroom

they dont make the house teams because no first years can try out, Ron

MINNIE PLAYED QUIDDITCH?!?!? WHY DIDN'T I KNOW THIS

why didnt you speak up earlier Mione wtf

bc the fire wont give you away, harry, better hide

FLUFFY, WHOS A GOOD BOY

they have much worse things locked up in the school, Ron

Oliver wood is a bloody liar because i still dont fuckign understand quidditch, also theres like 500 rules, wtf

thats a shitty explanation of how the game works, Oliver

BLOW IT UP SEAMUS

SHES TWO FEET BEHIND YOU RON YOU IDIOT

carrot cake? on halloween?

dont shrug as if you didnt literally bully her ron

thought youd oughta know, bit of an understatement Quirell

no duh the trolls left the dungeon ron

lying: the best start to any friendship

we're at a net zero points for gryffindor for the year at the moment

the amount of interaction these kids have with professors is so weird to me, is this what small class size do to kids?? its weird

not comforting Oliver

Okay i understand Oliver simps now, I get it okay

are there no backups or subs for quidditch? feels like there should be, like of all the games

set him on fire mione, i know hes not the villain of the movie but god he sucks

fancy flying from harry fucking potter

okay but also i feel like there are some things we should not trust hagrid with, like hes not that great at keeping secrets

why is harry excited about christmas if he thinks hes not getting presents? i knw there are other aspects but like thats the only reasont o get up early

i always remember this scene at night for some reason??

not just an invisibility cloak, THE invisibility cloak ron

btw who gives it to harry? is it remus? is it dumbledore? is it like an inheritance thing? whats up with that?

there are jumpscares in harry potter

he very much can hide, filch

stop being a narc mrs norris

does harry even know what his parents look like at this point? how does he know who the fuck is in the mirror of erised?? he doesnt have that stupid scrapbook yet does he

oh they nod, sure lets clear up that plot hole

they shouldve put sirius and remus in the mirror in that scene, shown his whole family, wouldve been a nice setup

how does rupert grint already look so tired as a twelve year old

big speech to give to a twelve year old Dumbledore, when you wont even tell him what you see

Emma really does just slam that book on Daniels hand, thats mustve fucking sucked

the fact that ive watched two movies that had Nicholas Flamel in two very different roles this year is very strange to me

well thats probably on account of it being a fucking dragon egg hagrid, now isnt it?

was hagrid a hufflepuff? i think he was, maybe a ravenclaw

yes four, you blonde idiot

that shot is really nice, it sets them apart

what happened to filch to make him such a miserable man?

ooh mention of werewolves, awooo werewolves of london

yeah just dip your whole hand in hagrid, dont be scared of the strange liquid, take a nice little bath

i loev that dog, i want that dog, i want to hug that dog

god just the look of that forest is so bloody cool

wait so is that quirell walking fucking backwards?

maybe ask who the fuck youre talking to before asking other questions??? wtf harry

why are yout talking to the centaur like hes your old friend harry, youve literally never met him before

snape doesnt want the stone at all Harry

god hagrid you sweet stupid man

snape is completely valid for that, if a twelve year old ever looked at me like that i would punch them

Do you think people ever loose invisibility cloaks? like theyre invisible do you think they ever just never get found again

i hate the look of the dog spit, that is so gross

they really left everything in except for the fucking potions didnt they, damn

harry potter walked so queens gambit could run

hermione, posted up

rons stupid in the later movies because he got a concussion as a twelve year old

god harry really posted up to beat up snape in fucking khakis

"I knew you were a danger to me!" Hes twelve, Quirell

let me wait for this weird dude to unravel his head scarf instead of running away

the magic in this movie is real fucking conditional isnt it

just some casual necromancy for the stone? you sure about that voldy, you two faced bitch?

let me choke out this twelve year old real quick

oh yeah why is he able to just avengers endgame Quirell? is there an answer to that? like was that ever found out

do you think voldy passing by him while he hold the stone actually killed him but since he holds the stone hes functionally unkillable and then some magic gets put into him and thats why he can return to life later when he actually goes to the whole afterlife place?

ohhh we're vouching on the blood magic for the endgaming of Quirell

do you think dumbledore came across the vomit flavored bean before or after his sister died?

Mione's got a headband! Looking snazzy!

how did Hufflepuff only get 352 points? Gryffindor literally lost 150 points this year and they only beat them by 50, wtf, is it because they kept getting caught with weed

I wont even speak on the fucking outrage that is this point awarding, its already been spoken on. However, Neville shouldve gotten more points

What if someone just stood up and started challenging Dumbledores math, that would be so funny

some of these extras are really attractive

but james potter is somehow so fucking ugly why did they do that to my mans

hagrid deserves the last shot of this film, i love him, he deserves everything, that stupid sweet man

[tylerromeo]

I guess I kind of just had my egg cracking moment about 16 days ago

Did I use that right?

(Edit to add: last night I had 3 separate dreams after waking for toilet each time and in every one I was transitioning and was a boy

When I woke up i had to post something because I feel like I cant ignore it and push it away anymore)

I was talking with my partner about my childhood and how i remember certain things

Such as:

- I hated wearing anything girly dresses skirts or frills

- I never wanted to play with the girls I only ever had friends that were boys and

remember being SO jealous of them

- my one good friend Joshua gave me a pair of his batman jocks so that I could have some boy underwear to wear (I cherished them so much)

- i remember the first time my mum let me wear jeans and a button up shirt and converse to church and I was so elated and excited. I was running along the street, watching myself running in the windows of the shops and feeling like THATS ME!!!

- I distinctly remember at my friend's parents wedding i was so jealous of Joshua's suit/tux. I watched him and the other boys playing in their suit pants and shirts and bow ties feeling so ugly and stupid in my frilly dress

- as a teen I never got into the regular stuff girls liked make-up and boy bands and spice Girls etc

- I was into punk music and the pop punk scene and I loved dressing in that attire because it was so gender neutral and masc

- I remember when I went behind my mums back and cut my long hair off (it was down to my bum)

My mum was so angry at me but I was SO HAPPY I couldn't stop looking at myself with my short hair

- I remember praying every night that I'd wake up with a penis

- I uses to stand to pee ALWAYS when I was a kid

- whenever we would play pretend games I always played as a boy ALWAYS

- I used to get so.angry when I was told I was pretty or beautiful

- I had a flat chest for a long time and never wore a bra until I was bullied for it in year 8

I remember when I woke up and my chest had grown substantially and I cried and cried and refused to go to.school.

- I am very dysphoric about my chest but I thought it was okay with my downstairs parts but I was definitely asexual because yuck!

But now I believe i have bottom dysphoria and that's why the penetration part made me feel so gross all these years?

Being on the autism spectrum made growing up difficult because I learnt to mimic social things and realised ok i have to be more girly so I would force myself to be feminine but it made me so miserable

I thought I had to be a straight female as thats how I was born physically and the men I dated pushed for my femininity to be more prominent and so I did just that and I never felt happy.

I felt like an imposter in that costume.

I went through many transitions from femme to masc and back again throughout my young adult years settling somewhere in the NB spectrum

I've always stated to friends "I'm more masculine than feminine" as a way to establish my masc presence among the as "one of the boys" and I hate being singled out for example when they'd say "hey guys and Jess" or hey lads and girls just because I was in the chat on a game or whatever I HATE THAT

Never did I realise that these things could mean I'm trans until recently at 33 years old

I feel angry and upset that I have wasted all these years I guess?

I also keep talking myself out of it like im 33 I can't just realise now that I'm a trans man that's also gay, like how could I NOT know that?!

But I guess maybe I always did but no one heard me

I hope this can help someone else who is questioning and I guess I'm looking for advice if you have any?

peace and love

Tyler

[jimmymcgools]

If you're still up for the writing ask meme: the part in chapt 13 where Kim decides to take the phone call in *another* direction (like, WHY does she decide to do that?)

(thank you for letting me ignore this for a full week as i worked on chapter 4 of slip and fall season instead ♥️)

but yes i will do this forever!!! if anyone else has scenes they’d still like to hear my thoughts on 🙏hmu

fic commentary meme and my answers 

the boring doylist answer to your question is: because considering the 1x03 call i figured if i was gonna write mailroom mcwexler i’d be letting myself & everyone else down if i didn’t include a phone sex scene!

and “hold tight to the ropes” really hooked me on the idea of jimmy calling from cicero. so huge credit to that wonderful fic, i mention it in the chapter notes because i stole (and hopefully remixed?) so much of that set up. 

A click. “Hello?” “Hey,” Jimmy says. “Happy Thanksgiving.”  this made me think of mulder and scully when i wrote it and i thought of them reading it over again now. 

“A Thanksgiving classic,” Kim says dryly. “No Way Out.” Jimmy grins. “Nice. Costner at his best.” one of those movie picks where hopefully kim’s joke works just based on the title. jimmy’s dialogue could read ironic, but i do think this is one of costner’s best roles. 

Jimmy chuckles. “We played Monopoly.” mcgill bros monopoly! writing this chapter i learned that you’re supposed to auction off properties if you don’t choose to buy them when you land on them, apparently. #research  💀that’s right i researched monopoly “10 most common arguments people have over a game of Monopoly according to Hasbro” guess i should’ve credited more in my chapter notes huh

A scrap of paper reading That Hamilton Woman rests beneath the plastic but above the original cover for The Boys from Brazil. ruth mcgill playing favourites with laurence olivier movies

“Yeah,” Kim says. “Yeah, sometimes it would snow.” i think i looked this up as well and it only snows like one in 20 thanksgivings but, uh. fanfic.  

Flat white fields dotted with fence posts, like ellipses on a page, drifting into the distance i really like using “this thing looks like writing on a page” type metaphors for kim, but also the idea of endless ellipses seemed pretty perfect for red cloud. 

A little blue dot in the endless fields of white. He exhales. “Kim?” a strange thought process for jimmy here, but he gets to white sands from it somehow. it helps that kim had made the comparison herself, too, while they were at white sands. that it reminded her of winters back home. 

“Can we go back to White Sands?” he asks. i think/hope you can tell from the convo, but jimmy’s not asking for phone sex, he’s more asking for a return to that openness/vulnerability/intimacy. they’ve had a nice conversation so far, but it’s kind of the conversation two friends might have -- “yeah, family. we fought over monopoly. how are you?” -- and he wants more. 

A beat. “What, tonight? That might be pretty tricky.” kimberly #deflection wexler

“But scared of what I might do next. Scared to get too close, maybe.” i wanted there to be this real wariness in the family around jimmy at this point in his life. i didn’t have much to work with for the acb ruth relationship, other than knowing she had nobody by her deathbed but chuck and jimmy, and that she was still up in cicero/berwyn.  i liked the idea that, as much as ruth loves jimmy, in 1992 she’s starting to close herself off from him in that way mothers can do -- she pretends everything is good, she has innocent conversations about movies, she tells him she loves him. to protect/spare him? to protect the purity of the relationship so that she has an outlet where she can pretend nothing’s wrong for a while? i’m not sure. i don’t think it’s good for them. 

It’s like he can hear the connection between them, the long strands of copper wire humming over the country. little reference to chapter 5 when they’re watching born yesterday: “But this is as precious and as fragile to him as crystal, as a string wound to its snapping point, as small human breaths down copper wire.”

“Is there anything you can do?” Kim asks finally. kim the fixer 

staring up at the vine-patterned cornice. oh great jimmy’s looking at a ceiling again 

He counts the leaves, one-two-three, but his brain keeps racing okay whew, at least i only mentioned this one because i brought it up in the white sands chapter -- “His childhood bedroom back in Cicero used to have one, too, carved with vines or flowers or something” -- because he’s staring at the cornice in the motel room while he’s wondering what else he can do with his life. 

he still feels half a step behind something, like there’s something just around the next bend, like the top of a mountain that keeps vanishing into the distance,  two road trip references for the price of one in this paragraph -- them driving up the sandias out of abq, here

And then, as if she can feel the tension and wants to break it, Kim says, “You know, we could do more than just talk.” ayyy we made it, moment of truth!! so why does kim do it, in the fun, watsonian way? 

i think it’s largely what you’ve brought up before -- like she does in breathe, and elsewhere in acb -- i think it’s kim turning to sex when the emotions get too muddy. and you put it better than me! “Kim seems to go physical instead of talking about things”. and when they’re states apart on a phone call? close enough! 

it’s also fixer kim still, right? she can tell that she hasn’t really helped at all with her responses, that jimmy’s still hurting. so here’s take 2. and maybe it’s kim following her own advice she’s just given to jimmy: “is there anything you can do?” 

and there’s that “kim and jimmy giving the other person what they think they need” thing that we’ve all talked about before. and i can’t remember the origin of it now! some interview? 

also she’s definitely hungry for it right now, too. that, like, addictive connection after she’s walled herself off for so long. and after she’s had that “i should call jimmy--oh shit i can’t. huh. hm. this is fine.” moment earlier in the day, too. 

“I’m kidding,” Kim says quietly. “Don’t leave me hanging.” and yeah, with the jimmy pov im always worried about trying to show how much kim wants jimmy, too. i hoped to give the sense that she needed the connection in this scene, too. 

“I mean, I haven’t checked the window, so Gene Hackman might be out there with an audio dish, but—yeah.”  always time for a movie reference. a bit of an ironic one -- he’s referencing the conversation, and i’m pretty sure the chuck stuff in 3x10 is inspired by the scene at the end of that movie when hackman tears up his apartment hopelessly looking for a bug.  (also jeepers, second gene hackman movie of the phone call, he’s also in no way out)

“I miss touching you.” It’s the first time he’s really spoken out loud about that physical intimacy, and something unwinds in his stomach, something that’s been coiled there a long time. oh man, spoilers for safs chapter 4 -- but interesting to reread this part of the conversation in particular when i’ve just written a chapter trying to show a really comfortable physicality between them. aw man. 

He breathes out, tipping his head back against the cold door, eyes tracing over the bare basement ceiling. there he goes there he goes again.mp3

And Kim exhales, and it sounds heavier than it did earlier. “You know, I had bruises there after last time.” starting from jimmy’s “i miss touching you” and then this from kim, i wanted to play with this shift in excitement/energy in the phone sex that comes when they both start actually opening up about the specific emotions/fallout from white sands that’s otherwise mostly gone unsaid. it drifts into more of a pure fantasy scenario after this but i always liked that honesty being a catalyst  kim: “I thought you might notice somehow.” :( 

and then it also seemed very them that they’d end up going with this HHM fantasy with discovery stakes and everything 😂they love their hypotheticals. and also i kinda got to weave in mailroom sex to the fic, almost, sneakily! 

“Thank you yourself,” she says you’re welcome seriously

i hope that wasn’t just me repeating everything we’ve already talked about back at you! 😂

[randomsevans]

LAWYERS LIES part 4

you hadn't return to your office in 2 days  , your excuse  was that you were “sick “ , not like thats a lie , you have been sick , morning sickness but nothing you haven't dealt with for the last week or so . 

you was currently sitting on your coach watching an episode of Doctor Who which was just what you need , who said a madman running around the universe wasnt fun to watch no matter how old or young you are . Your inner geek was happy . With your tub of vanilla l ice cream in your hand , nearly gone but that didnt stop you adding more caramel syrup , . You had a throw over your legs as you back was again the arm of the couch , starring at the screen 

that was what you were doing starring to stuck in your own head , not paying attention and mindless scoppong up ice cream and eating it . Your mind was full of question and kept playing scene in your head over and over again 

“did he mean it ? “ does he really love me ? it was just another lie  . But why was he crying ? he looked broken   .Maybe its because he is scared you could end his marriage ? or that your leave the firm after all you are one of the top lawyers , but thats not enough to make him cry , right ?

The image of his tears and broken look , when you didn’t tell him you love him back , played over and over again in your head . It brought you to tears because , you wanted to say it , scream it back , you still do now , because you love him as much as you shouldnt you do , you love him .

But every time  you heard him say he loves you all you could see was him with his assistant Peggy . 

You know you shouldn't feel like this , like you have been cheated on when you were doing the cheating on Sharon but still .

“what type of man cheats on his wife with two other women tells one he loves and gets her pregnant “

oh yeah thats another thing your 3 month plan is out the window . You dont want to go back to work but you have to for now , in order to make sure you and your baby have a secure  future , you need to keep working at Rogers firm until you can find a different job

“maybe shield firm ? after all Nat works there “

it bring you comfort in knowing you dont have to face the future alone , as you rub your flat belly with a small on your face as you think about your little one , but then falls as more question pop up 

“ will he / she hate you for them not having a dad ? what if Steve found out ? would he tell you get ride off it ? what about if there born before he finds out , will he take them of you ? He wouldnt do that would he ?  he probable wouldn't care about them “ 

You took a deep breath , in an attempt to clear your mind .

        *************************************************************************

 A knock on your front door startled you as you your earring in getting ready for work , once it was placed safely in your ear , you made your way to the door 

“who could it be “ you thought 

once you reached the door and went to open it , you paused 

“what about its Steve ?”   “ oh what does it matter you are probably going to see him in work any way . 

you braced your self and open the door , to be meet with a blue eyed brunet , in a sharp suite

“oh so your alive then “ he said 

“What did you think i died ?” you chuckled 

“Nat said you were ill , and you might be going to work today , so i made my way here to see if you need anything from work in case you wanted to work form home .” James paused “but it looks like you are going to the office “

“ yep i am  “ you said nervously 

“would you like a lift ?”he asked 

“Nat put you up to this didnt she ?”

“what i cant look after a friend and co worker ?” he dramatically said 

“oh okay , i suppose a lift would be nice “ you rolled your eye as a joke 

“good !”

“youll have to give me a moment i need to finish getting ready “ Bucky just nodded his head “ come in “ 

he followed you in 

“just ... um “ you paused as you began to feel uneasy 

“um . just .. sit “ 

you couldn't finish the sentence you ran to the sink in your kitchen as your baby made its daily morning appearance 

“y/n !” was all you heard as Bucky made his way over to you rubbing your back 

after calming down and wiping your mouth , there was silents 

“are you sure , you can go back it work ,?” he asked 

“im sure “  

“but what about if  you pass the bug around ?”

“its not a bug “ you quickly said , before you could even think about what you were saying 

James was silent almost too silent , he took a step back with wide eyes 

“what do you mean are you .... “ 

oh he was going to find out soon enough , fuck it 

“ yes , im pregnant” you said 

Bucky face only showed joy and excitement , he even did this little jump thing 

“ really “ he asked with a wide smile 

“uh yeah ?” you showed a confused face why is he so exited  

“that why you havnt been at work ?” you just nodded 

“omg !” he quickly brought you into his arms 

“congrats . oh my god , i cant believe it “  he took a step back and looked you up and down “ your going to be an amazing mother “

you nervously giggles “thanks “ 

he laught with you 

“ill tell you , your reaction was  better then Natasha “

“wait Natasha knew “

“um yeah “ that said that quietly as if that was a bigger secrete 

“that little ...  wait what was her reaction “

“ummm she ... “ you began 

“wait! “ Buckys face went stern  “ how are you pregnant i didn know you were seeing anyone “ he said in his protective brotherly voice 

your face dropped , you really hoped he would ask 

“ i ... “

“y /n “ he warned 

you really had to think on your feet here 

“ it was just a one night , i cant even remember “ you said quickly and nervously 

he simple nodded , it seemed he brought it 

“okay “

“so you are going to do this by your self ?”

“well im not am , ill have you and nat “ that caused the smile to reappear on Buckys face 

“you sure will !” 

“ just “ you paused , taking a deep breath “just dont tell anyone okay please , i dont need this getting “ 

“okay , that fine , your secrete and little one is safe with me “ the smile never dropped on his face

“ i mean it i dont want anyone knowing “ you said sternly 

“okay ... you know Rogers is going to be upset that his best lawyer will be on maternity leave “ 

that caught you off guard why is he bring up Steve 

“well ... he will just have to stuck it up ...”

Tag list

@little-smurf

@patzammit

[adrunkgiraffe]

I have been through this journey before, so I get to be actually frustrated about it.

IUnder a read more because im not subjecting y’all to this. Also: I should caveat I haven’t watched the episode cause I’m waiting till its on Netflix but I have watched way too many other episodes of Supernatural so I have a right to say these things. 

TL;DR: I mean you all knew Cas’ confession was fucking bullshit and that SPN is...hm. But I’d like to actually express my genuine frustration, for a moment? I’m going to say things you already know, but I have too much knowledge of this show and too much stupid meta in my brain about a series I haven’t genuinely enjoyed for at least 5 years which makes this not just blandly bad but disgustingly insulting to me not even as a gay just as like. A writer?

Or, even shorter: Cas’ confession is just a Charlie Bradbury Speedrun 

So. As some of you may know if, for some reason, you followed me back in 2013 (and till...okay fine 2015), I used to be, uh. Really into SPN. Really, I was into Destiel. Like, as in, I slogged through seasons 1-3 to get to Cas and am also really vulnerable to the Sunk Cost Fallacy and projecting onto characters. (I was in 8th grade in 2013, okay? Get off my back)

Also, because I monopolised use of the TV, I kind of...also got my parents into it? In a “this is silly but fun” kind of way.

Over time, critiques of the show from viewers, learning what queerbaiting is at all, fatigue with how long it was going, and also fatigue from how characters I enjoyed, like Rufus, or Crowley, or Ellen, or Jo, or Kevin, or Charlie, or Cas a few times, kept getting killed off. As time went on, it didn’t escape my notice that, aside from Cas, all of these characters fit one or more of the following criteria:

They were a woman

They were a person of color

Were Queer or Queer-coded in some way (listen Crowley was bad rep but at least Mark Sheppard actually kissed a man on screen)

I also just...generally got tired of the way the show treats women and sidelines people of color. 

The final straw really came with Charlie’s death. It got us all excited, because she hadn’t been back in a bit! And it was interesting to see how reuniting with her dark side from Oz had changed her! (yeah remember the fucking Wizard of Oz storyline? The writers sure don’t!) And maybe she’d get developed! Because at this point, Charlie and the fairly good writing of her character was a major upside for the series! Charlie was cool, fun, gay, and morally complex in a way...none of the female characters had been before her, in large part because by definition, her relationship with the boys would always be platonic.

And then. Offscreen. She is violently murdered. For no damn good reason. Like, literally, her being brought back in this episode after fucking off to europe after having returned from fucking off to Oz seems to have filled two purposes in total. 

The codex is solved (but Sam doesn’t know till next episode)

Charlie is dead, which means Dean can be angry, specifically at Sam, and kill more people because he’s the big bad this season. 

That’s it. Two things. Twooooo whole reasons to do this episode. Whoopee. 

But you didn’t come here for this, you came here for me to rip this reveal to shreds. Don’t worry, I’ll get there. What I want in your minds is that Supernatural already had a really good anddynamic queer character. And then they killed her off to make Dean angry. No, it doesn’t matter that they brought her back in season 13 or whatever. They made that decision. 

After the rage this incited, I started realizing general flaws in the writing (I had probably already noticed them but now I was angry enough to complain.) Every conflict is born of Sam and Dean not communicating/taking on burdens and Dean being angry at Cas for reasons that ranged from good to ridiculous, but in a way that always went way too fucking long, (which...yes, does make the “you do it for love” gifs fucking hilarious). It didn’t help that seasons 11 and 12 were next, which meant Demon Dean and GOD’S FUCKING SISTER, plus the decision to resurrect Mary, which, while I do like her later scenes, as a season 12 finale it...well I’ll be honest it kinda sucked. It undercut the majority of the Winchester’s’ arcs and their slow and painful journey out of their father’s toxic vengeance quest and knowing Mary as a person when it’s too late to know her was one of the last semi-compelling grounders of the narrative. 

By this point it was a hate-watch for my parents and I.

So then, I’m at college, and I’m not watching anymore cause I don’t have the motivation or access to Hulu to continue, and SPN is bad. I watch the Scooby Doo crossover when it comes out and my friend and I make fun of it, and we also continue making jokes about Dean and Cas and queerbaiting because we’re queer, but I don’t keep up. My Dad does though, so when I return, I watch some with the fam and lads. It’s even more tiring without context. 

So flash forward to Quarantine, my sister, the only one with taste, has left, and we have run out of netflix to watch. So we return to the well, and seasons 13-14 are. I’m gonna say it. Bad. Really fucking bad. The cycle of bad communication continues, season 14 has like seven antagonists and the way it’s structured makes it so I literally cannot remember the timeline of a season I watched 3 months ago. Oh also, they have a queer coded cannibal snake monster for...well I guess Jack’s snake bud was cool but like. Huh wow it’s almost like these writers don’t handle queers well. 

Our one saving grace is Cas, but he’s barely in any episodes, though I did note that his deal with the empty, being happy completely for one moment killing him, that struck me as “this has potential and I know they’re gonna half-ass it somehow.” Also Jack and Mary, but then oh...plot….The most compelling it gets is literally the finale.

But then, 3 days later, the first half of season 15 comes out on Netflix and it’s...actually kind of acceptable. The new character they give Jack’s actor is fun to watch him play until they make him evil. Exploring just how toxic Chuck can be gave the series direction again. The alternate future was genuinely scarring, and Eileen’s return was genuinely moving. Most of all, though, Cas got the opportunity to tell Dean no, that Dean was being unfair to him, had always been unfair to him, and he was sick of it. I had no illusions, I knew Destiel was never gonna happen, and Cas was gonna die, but giving him that bit of agency, letting Cas grow and be self-sufficient, and be angry with Dean not for existential reasons but interpersonal ones, was such a good sign for me, and Dean grew too! Dean fucking apologized for being horrible and Jensen Ackles had a...yknow what, ill give it to him, he had a good acting moment. 

But the thing. About. The “I love you.” 

Let’s take it in parts.

What was good: I’m gonna admit it, lads, “Wanting what I can’t have” - AS A LINE - is good, and, structurally, there is something to the Empty Deal that could have been an interesting aspect of Cas’ arc when it comes to self actualization and being on even footing with Dean. The problem is, this is Supernatural, and that arc only comes up when I bring it up because character study, even in bad media, is fun for me. 

What was bad:

I mean. Like. All of it? All of it. 

Okay. Fine. I’ll be specific. 

Cas dies immediately when - possibly because- he is revealed as having feelings for Dean. They kill him as they queer him, that’s a Bury Your Gays Speedrun right there.

Like the least they could have done is have him mention it to someone in another scene or something to establish some romantic feelings on the part of canon a full episode beforehand. That would have been the literal bare minimum. 

When Cas starts praising Dean, for some reason both the writing and Misha’s acting take a bit of a downswing (from...where it already was). Cas, whose most powerful moment this season was acknowledging that Dean’s anger at him is cruel and unfair, flatly praises him for doing everything out of love and it reads with a misunderstanding of both Dean as a character and Cas’ understanding of Dean. Dean is angry! VERY ANGRY! And it’s a problem he needs to work on and rarely does. 

Talking out of my ass, a better speech would have been about how Dean is angry because of his love for Sam, family, and the people around him, how, for better or for worse, he can’t help but be angry on behalf of others, and that his journey of moving that tendency towards the better is what made Cas care so much. Guys this alteration to the metaphor took 2 minutes to write tops I am an Art History student and these are TV WRITERS WITH YEARS OF EXPERIENCE CAN YOU TELL THEYRE NOT TRYING YET? 

A better speech would, of course, have come out of a better series. My point: this part was half-assed. Poorly written. Wow it’s almost like the series is also poorly written. 

 Also, Misha is the better actor of the three(***OF THE THREE), but his choices in that scene are jarringly out of character which. Makes the bad writing worse. It doesn’t help that they cut to the same fucking shot of Dean 3 times. The chemistry in that scene makes it feel so fucking hackneyed. Because it is. 

This combines lead me to the point: (wait there was a point to this?)

As someone who does not have the luxury of watching this capsized ship fall into boiling seas from a distance, it is less insulting to me that they did this so last minute and then sent Cas to the Void than it is how they did it. They had ingredients for something that could have been compelling enough to me as a former fan of the show to think that they had put effort into it, that they had decided months, perhaps even years ago to do this, and had crafted a storyline around it. That this was an intentional decision they cared about. It wasn’t. It was barely even pandering, because it’s almost insultingly blatant. 

SPN kinda proved to me that it didn’t care about queers when Charlie was killed off. It proved it to me again when Cas, not only died in confessing his love for Dean but did it in the weakest result of what could have been a surprisingly strong story.

[artsybanchou]

I’m a big fan of 80s/90s anime and Ranma 1/2 played a big role in my childhood. The premise has sooooo much food for thought when it comes to looking at gender and specifically the performance of gender. I’m about to get INTO it, so, here’s your warning-- read more is a ramble. (LONG ramble)

Oh ho ho ho! WELCOME TO MY HELL!

Aight, so let me set the stage for you-->

Two people, who should not be parents, have a kid. The father, Genma, a fairly successful martial artist, takes their just-born son on a training journey without consulting the mother. By training journey, I mean that they travel all over the world with little to no money, either stealing from or scamming people in order to make sure they can eat, under the guise of training the son, Ranma, to become the greatest martial artist of the “Anything Goes” school of martial arts. One of the most frequent scams the father pulls is promising his son’s hand in marriage to various families in exchange for a dowry before running off with both his son and the dowry, never to be seen again. This-- inevitably-- comes back to bite them in the ass. But more on that later.

We don’t get to see a lot of Ranma’s childhood on the training journey, just the occasional incredibly horrific flashback to something that would become a national incident were it to happen in the real world. For example, at one point in time, his father finds a Chinese pamphlet of an ~ancient lost Chinese art~ that is INCREDIBLY POWERFUL!!!!! wow! It’s called Neko-ken. So he decides to teach his six-year-old this technique, although he can’t actually read Chinese so he does it based off the diagrams-- which detail a process of collecting a good number of cats, starving them for a few days straight, and then tossing his son, covered in fish sausages (possibly tied up, can’t remember), into the pit to fend for himself (and not be eaten alive) for hours on end. Surprise, surprise, Ranma comes out incredibly traumatized and with an intense fear of cats (something his father would’ve seen coming if he was able to read Chinese as the pamphlet says that someone would have to be crazy to try to teach someone this technique and that it causes severe psychological damage-- also could’ve been avoided if his father had any common sense or fatherly instincts, but hey that’s just asking too much of Genma). This is not the result his father wanted, so he tries to “fix” it by doing the exact same thing multiple times, just with different cat foods wrapped around his son because... I genuinely don’t know what his thought process was but yeah. So that’s just a tiny snapshot of what his childhood was like as well as how much of a massive idiot his father was. And since Ranma never interacted with his mother, guess who had the greatest influence in his development (yay........). (save him) (also this is based off my memory from watching the anime YEARS ago, so some small details might be wrong but the big, overarching “his dad is a terrible person” thing is still very much true even if some of these smaller details aren’t)

When Ranma is a teenager, his father brings him to a Chinese training ground full of cursed springs. The tour guide repeatedly tries to explain what exactly this place they’re visiting is, but the father and son pair are two hard-headed idiots and get right to sparring. Ranma knocks his father into a spring pretty quick only to be caught off guard when his father reemerges from said spring as a panda and grand slams our protagonist into another one of the cursed springs. Our manly man martial artist protagonist emerges from this spring as a dainty, busty teenage girl. /The horror./ The panic from both Ranma and his father’s deeply shaken fragile masculinities gives the tour guide enough time to reveal that they had fallen into the cursed springs of the drowned panda and the drowned girl (one guess who fell into which one) and that anyone who falls into a cursed spring will take on the form of the life form that drowned in it. They can return to their original bodies by being splashed with hot water but, from now on, every time they’re hit with cold (or even apparently lukewarm) water, they’ll change into these new cursed forms.

Now, I’m sure you all saw this coming from the type of man that Ranma’s father is based on everything I’ve said so far, but Genma is the worst(TM). So Genma is all, “no SON of MINE can be a GIRL! >:((((((” and Ranma, who has been raised for his entire conscious life by this man, and only this man, is also very much not Okay(TM) with this because he’s a man, a manly fighting man who was raised to be the manliest of fighting men who fight. He can’t be a GIRL. 

Except he totally can. Because these two start taking advantage of Ranma’s feminine body pretty much immediately in order to continue running scams so that they can eat and whatnot while traveling. Of course, Genma constantly shames Ranma by saying things like, “I can’t believe my son is such a failure of a martial artist, being a girl! I’m so ashamed!” and whatnot at every opportunity but especially when they are in an argument and Ranma is winning or if he needs Ranma to do something for him. He frequently manipulates his son by using this kind of guilt-tripping language as though it’s Ranma’s fault that his body is like this. Nevermind that they both frequently profit off of Ranma’s female body for scams, Genma still puts Ranma down for having it and Ranma internalizes that because he’s 15 and his father is the only person he’s ever known.

And I’m sure we all hate Genma now, as we should, because fuck Genma. What kind of woman would ever marry Genma? (And we assume a woman is married to Genma because how could a man this bigoted do anything other than marry a woman all traditional and whatnot). If only Ranma wasn’t taken from his mother so young. Maybe he would’ve turned out a better person~ Well, uh, bad news, lads :/  So, by the time we meet Ranma’s mom in the series, we’ve known most of these characters for a chunk of time. It’s already quite well established how terrible of a human being Genma is. Ranma may or may not have started the episode out admitting he doesn’t know much about his mom after being asked about her. A standard set-up. I don’t quite remember all the details of the episode, only the important things-- here’s the important thing: Genma’s wife, Nodoka, made Genma swear something to her before he took their toddler on a training journey all around the world. He had to raise Ranma to become “a Man among Men” (and we’ll talk about how she defines manliness) and, if he failed, then both he and Ranma must commit seppuku. 

Yeah, that's right. 

If her son isn’t enough of a man by her standards then he has to commit ritual suicide.

Her son who now transforms into a girl every time he is touched with at least a ladle’s worth water that isn’t steaming.

(hey have i mentioned save Ranma yet? save him seriously)

Her definition of manliness? All the shit the misandrists of tumblr swear is the inherent evils to all men. She thinks her son needs to be unapologetically forceful in /all/ he does. Especially in his romantic forays :///// (yeah this is going where you think it is)

When she does decide he isn’t manly enough (because Ranma was being sexually harassed by an old man who forcibly put him in a sailor outfit, no im not kidding, happosai, said old man, is a whole other element of the show that like holy shit) and tries to get him to commit seppuku, the solution the cast comes up with is to have Ranma “peek” at (his friend? girlfriend? fiance? frenemy? roommate? it’s weird-- technically they’re the two romantic leads but their chemistry is like -5 because she constantly physically hits him for things that really aren’t his fault and just ://) Akane while she is bathing and that will prove his manliness to his mother so that he doesn’t have to literally die. Will having Ranma be a fucking voyeur prove his manliness to his mother, you ask? Yep. This is Manly(TM) and so Ranma gets to live another day. Yay. Once again, molestation saves the day. (aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa) All of this is played off as a joke, for the record. No character is really acknowledged as being “a bad person” for any of this behavior-- not molester Happosai, not trying-to-kill-her-own-child Nodoka, etc. 

So these are the people who made Ranma. Who shaped this kid with the ability to spontaneously switch between male and female bodies (presuming he has water on hand). Also, obviously, Genma had more influence seeing as Ranma never saw his mother between the ages of two and (I think) 16(?), but. regardless, these are the people who shaped his understanding of gender. For all intents and purposes, our lad should be such a pressure cooker of toxic and fragile masculinity that he just about commits seppuku himself every time he ends up in his female body. 

But he doesn’t. In fact, Ranma is largely comfortable in his female body as long as his father isn’t trying to hold said body against him (wait did that come out wrong?). Ranma has no hesitations taking on his female form for something as little as a discount on ice cream. He makes the statement, “when it comes to eating out, being a girl is the only way to go”-- because he’s able to get an extra scoop for being “cute”

There’s a scene very early on in the series about exactly that which has always stuck with me. It opens with Ranma in his female body at a cafe with Akane and they both order fancy ice cream parfaits. Ranma is extremely excited and exclaims, “I’ve always wanted to try one of these!” 

Akane replies with, “don’t tell me you’ve never had ice cream before.”

And Ranma proceeds to explain that he’s never had ice cream like /this/ because it would be too embarrassing for a guy. When Akane asks if he isn’t embarrassed now, happily shoving huge spoonfuls of ice cream into his mouth, he responds with, “hey, I’m a girl now. It don’t count.” Akanes shoots back with a “REAL girls don’t eat like that” (because our lad is eating with such gusto-- he’s living, he’s thriving, he is demolishing that parfait and there is ice cream all over his face) 

He goes, “I’ll eat it however I want.” And then finishes the whole thing off and proclaims that he wants to order the chocolate one next.

Moments like that were the ones where I loved the show the most. We can see Ranma’s insecurities about his masculinity (thank you /soo/ much for that genma) in that he isn’t willing to perform an ‘unmanly’ action in public in his male body. He can’t be *seen* eating girly ice cream. But when he is admonished for not living up to feminine standards in his female body (eat more daintily), he just goes, ‘i’ll do what i want’. Young me really resonated with that, being born with a female assigned at birth body and growing up in Texas. 

It feels like there’s a trans narrative buried in the steaming hot mess that is this work by Takahashi Rumiko-- and it is abundantly clear that was never her intention so I wouldn’t exactly recommend trying to give her an award or anything. She said that she wanted to write a work with a male main character but was so worried about how many male readers she had, she made the decision to make (as she described) a half-male half-female main character (essentially so she could have her cake and eat it too if you will-- all the self aggrandizing fantasies of a male protagonist her male readers could imagine themselves as along with a copious amount of fan service-- the great majority of which was at Ranma’s unwilling expense in his female body which like ://////// (remember that old man I mentioned before??)--  with the female protagonist body). And, like, I’m not saying Takahashi Rumiko is a terrible person or anything-- I don’t know what her beliefs are, I only know her works which are quite old at this point. Takahashi Rumiko is a big deal in the mangaka world because she was one of the first big shonen mangakas who was openly a woman. Normally, men wrote shounen (which literally translates to boys) manga and women wrote shoujo (which literally translates to girls) manga-- the genres were literally divided along gender lines in terms of their intended audiences but also, to a certain extent, their creators. If a woman wanted to write/draw shounen, usually she had to use a pen name that sounded fairly masculine in order to not impact the perception of her work. Takahashi Rumiko was working in that environment so I would understand why she’d want to be careful but, at the same time, I still kind of hate a lot of the things that she normalizes in her works. Especially assault. Both physical and sexual assault she constantly used as a punchline. Not as much anymore. Her most recent work I’ve read was Rinne and the punchline with that one was that the male lead is super poor, literally penniless, and is constantly starving so hahahahha humor amirite? Pain being funny seems to be her through line now that assault is off the table. At least he isn’t constantly getting whole ass tables thrown at him by his love interest as though that’s supposed to be a cute relationship dynamic (Akaneeeeeeeee). I digress. Takahashi Rumiko’s works played a big fucking role in my childhood from Ranma to Inuyasha to Lum (which I encountered well into my teens and therefore didn’t jive with at all because I’d finally learned sexual assault =/= funny and this was one of her more dated works) and so on and just--  I don’t know if I can watch her older stuff the same way I used to. I’m scared to try, honestly. Because some of the ideas behind her works are so interesting-- like Ranma 1/2-- but then you have to sit through episode after episode of a teenage boy in a girl’s body being sexually assaulted by a remorseless old man only to try to fight back at which point he is physically assaulted but also he still has to grovel to and respect said old man because he’s his father’s master and therefore he has to learn martial arts from him but the old man is constantly wagering Ranma having to pose for him in incredibly skimpy outfits if Ranma wants to learn literally anything and alsso RANMA IS FUCKING FIFTEEN/SIXTEEN JESUS CHRIST IS THERE NO FUNCTIONING ADULT ANYWHERE IN THE VVICINITY SAVE HIM!

I NEED TO DIGRESS

It feels like there’s an unintentional trans narrative buried in this anime. It’s not a fun one (but most trans narratives aren’t either so). This is a boy who knows he’s a boy-- even when his body disagrees. He frequently asserts that “he’s a boy” even when in his female body because he is. He’s a boy. He’ll reference being a girl “in appearance” like with the ice cream parfait scene earlier, but when it comes to identity statements, he’s always a boy. This narrative is about him navigating gender presentation and societal assumptions in order to live however he wants. He’s constantly contending with his own forms of gender dysphoria, whether that be his own gripes about doing anything unmanly (eating ice cream) or the very real threat of his mother fucking killing him if he does anything unmanly (aaaaaaaaaaaa), and he navigates tons of threats by choosing how he presents himself.

There are characters that are in love with the male “version” of Ranma and want to kill the female “version” of Ranma (who, for the record, goes by the name Ranko) and vice versa. The Kuno siblings are a great example. Kodachi is in love with Ranma (and is not above literally fucking using date rape drugs on him to get to him) and wants to fucking kill Ranko whereas Tatewaki Kuno, her brother, is in love with Ranko (the lovely pigtailed girl, he calls her) and has literally sent assassins after Ranma. Ranma essentially has to choose between being sexually assaulted or physically assaulted every time he runs into either of them in terms of what body he is presenting. 

I feel like I should let you know, ye who have actually read this far, that Ranma is able to protect himself pretty well from the assault. Like, our boy ain’t dead. Later on he literally fucking kills a god because he’s really passionate about martial arts so he puts all of himself into it and god damnit does his effort show but, honestly, his ability to protect himself shouldn’t mean that it is okay to assault him. Assault is assault. And just because he can fight back doesn’t mean he always does. Akane, his main love interest, regularly sends him through roofs and across town with the force of her Up + B (aka magically appearing hammer), usually for things that aren’t his fault in any way. Akane actually came to the conclusion that Ranma was a pervert when she (fully dressed) walked in on him (naked because he was in the bath) even though the bathroom was obviously occupied. She constantly gets mad at him for things that are beyond his control and then takes her frustrations out on him by literally beating him up and he never fights back-- which is admirable of him but also made me never want to root for their relationship because that isn’t a red flag, my dude, that’s a red planet. the whole of mars is out here trying to warn everyone that this relationship is the most toxic thing since RoundUp.) 

Usually, when watching a show, you get really invested in the character’s aspirations. You want them to ‘get the girl’, ‘get the promotion’, ‘become the pokemon master’ and whatnot. All I ever wanted for Ranma was for him to fake his own death and run far, far away from everyone who ever knew him as “Ranma”. He’d have to fake his own death, obviously, because otherwise his father and Happosai would track him down because, for his father, Ranma is a walking meal ticket and, for Happosai, Ranma is a teenage girl he can sexually assault at any time. Those two would chase Ranma to the ends of the earth if they thought he was trying to get away from them so--

Ranma. Help him.

There’s so much more to dissect with this show. It’s kind of accidentally a great way to look at gender presentation, especially all the terrible negatives that come with constrained gender roles. I use He/Him pronouns when talking about Ranma because it is abundantly clear that he sees himself as a man and I respect that. Sometimes nonbinary-me is like, but think what a gender-fluid icon our boy would be-- literally switching perceived genders via fluids-- and I think that version of Ranma would be a lot happier than the canon one but, I think the canon Ranma is an important reflection of what a lot of people go through, cisgender, transgender, and beyond, when trying to parse what it means to present a gender and the roles you’re supposed to play. 

Maybe Ranma can go on a journey of self-discovery with his own gender after faking his death and escaping Nermina. 

I was all over the place writing this but this isn’t an essay and I’m not being graded so ha fuck you (excpet no not really fuck you because you either a) read this whole thing or b)scrolled down to the bottom to see if i’d get to the fucking point already-- which for the record, I don’t really-- and either way it means you were a little curious what I had to say so thanks I guess). None of this is exceptionally well-thought-out. I wouldn’t exactly stamp this with any kind of official gender discourse seal. It’s all just food for thought.