#malex-sorta

[burntotears]

Fanfic Origin Story

Tagged by @bekkachaos 💕

What was your first fandom (reading and/or writing)?

Popslash RPF - NSYNC

What was first story you ever wrote.

My main ship was Lance/Chris (Trickyfish), so it was most likely one for them. I wrote some Justin/Chris (Timbertrick) and Justin/Lance (Lamblove) too. I was 12 and everything I wrote was basically crack-fic or dark-fic where people were dying and shit. It was awful.

What's a piece of advice you would give your younger fic writing self?

Everything doesn't have to be devastating to be interesting. You can write something with a happy ending and it can still be interesting. But also, keep writing, because you'll get better.

What’s an early fandom interaction that stuck with you (be it a nice comment, a friend you made, a fic that got a lot of feedback)

Back in the Merlin, Legend of the Seeker, Lord of the Rings days I met this one Australian graphic artist who was super sweet and made a TON of stuff for me. She did all the banner work for us in the Merlin Slash Awards (which I ran), made us little banners when we participated in the fun little team contests for Disney, LotS, and LotR AND made me banners for my LiveJournal accounts. Just unbelievably kind and I am so sad that we fell out of touch.

The one amazing thing that really blew me away was the cover art she made me for my first multi-chapter long fic, Unsuitable, for the Merlin fandom. She's soooo talented and I still think about her.

Post a sentence or two from an older fic and a sentence or two from a newer one (if you want).

My first Sterek (and TW) fic, Be the Overflow

“A guy like you? That’s a load of bullshit and you know it. Erica said she had a crush on you for quite a while and you never even noticed her until she turned. For someone who knows what it feels like, Stiles, you sure are a huge fucking hypocrite. There are plenty of people who--” but Derek didn’t finish that sentence. Whatever it was he was about to say, he no longer wanted to say it.

“People who what? Who want to be my friend? Who want to laugh at my jokes but make out with the guy who’s hotter and a lot more mysterious? Someone more like Scott? Yeah, I know all about that, Derek, and I’d rather you didn’t call me a hypocrite before having all the facts, alright? How’s about we all just shut the hell up and stop talking about my non-existent love life because that would be really fucking swell right about now,” Stiles spat with a bit more venom than even he knew he possessed. He looked back down at the pipe and the rope and decided the task definitely needed his undivided attention now.

“You are completely full of it. You’re going to keep blaming other people for the fact that you can’t see the things that are right in front of your own goddamn face, so you know what? You deserve what you get, Stiles.” There was a hardness in Derek’s voice that Stiles couldn’t really place.

The Teen Malex AU, The Answer is Always "Okay."

Michael seemed better when Alex glanced up again. “Guerin… you wanna tell me what the fuck just happened?” Alex held up his wrist to indicate.

“I don’t - I don’t even know how to do that,” Michael said. He was afraid. Terrified, even. Alex couldn’t just see it on his face, though—it was something viscous seeping into his veins from inside Michael. He could feel it.

Alex stood up, moving the short distance across the shed. “Oh-okay, Guerin, you need to start talking. I know you’re freaked out or whatever, but so am I.”

Michael blinked and looked up at Alex as though he just realized he was there. “Oh shit.”

“Yeah, oh shit.” Alex rolled his eyes. “Rationally, I understand that my wrist is fixed. I get that you did something. So what I’m sorta gonna need you to fill me in on is how the fuck that is.”

Tagging these lovely folks if they would like 💕

@portraitofemmy @haloud @jule1122 @im-the-punk-who @angrycowboy @beautifulcheat @thesquidkid @bydayornight

[lambourngb]

First sentence: "There is no right answer here."

A million years later - so I ended up using this line in my big bang and 50K won’t fit in this box, so I had to write something else. [Set early season 3]

“There is no right answer here,” Alex replied, peering closely into the mirror as he delicately pinched the cut on his head closed with a fresh butterfly bandage. He caught Forrest’s unamused look in the reflection and sighed. “All I can say is it’s classified.”

“Classified? That’s the story you want to use? You left our date at 11 pm on a Friday night to handle some software emergency, yet here you are, covered in dirt the next day bleeding from your head. So classified is your answer?“

Alex turned the sink taps on midway through, letting the sound of the water drown out the rest of Forrest’s incredulous response. He cupped his hands in the water, to splash his face, letting the shock of the cold chase away the fatigue. He had received Michael’s text after dinner, just as they had arrived at the club for dancing, or rather Alex was ready to be a good spectator while Forrest danced. The simple words “Be careful. He’s dangerous. I’m sorry.” were enough to have Alex out the door with a flimsy excuse. With his head buried in phone as he left the club while he attempted to locate Michael, he had missed the shadow stepping out from the building to intercept his path to the parked Explorer.

One single blow had him incapacitated. The worst case of déjà vu . To have fallen prey yet again was embarrassing. But he had learned long ago, his higher brain functions often went off-line around Michael Guerin to say nothing of his sense of self-preservation.

Thankfully when he had resumed consciousness, he had recognized his surroundings, and by default, his attacker. Three glowing pods, and an empty cave meant he had just been a diverting plaything for Mr. Jones. There was no way to explain that to his boyfriend without revealing the alien secret.

Hiking in the dark through the desert to the access road, using only the faint light from his cell phone, was it’s own version of hell. His leg was a not-quiet agony of pain, radiating into his hip after he had finally made it the mile-marker and was able to call Kyle for help.

Alex leaned on the sink to relieve some of the pressure on the painful cup of his prosthesis, and opened his mouth to reply- except before he could, his front door burst open with a racket.

“ALEX!” Michael shouted, the clatter of his boots through the entry way toward the bedroom.

He pushed away from the sink, brushing past a stunned Forrest, and met Michael in the hallway. Before he could process it, Michael’s arms wrapped around him, pulling him off his feet in a tight hug. “Michael-”

“You’re okay, oh thank god, you’re okay,” Michael muttered quietly into Alex’s throat, his arms still clinging to Alex. The movement of Michael’s lips against his skin as he spoke sent a shiver of pleasure down Alex’s exhausted nerves. That fierce grip, tight enough to leave bruises, was strong enough to support the axis of the planet. Gravitation and orbital spins. “He said it was easy, to take you, and he said he just left you in the desert to die.”

“He?” That was Forrest.

Alex ignored the question as he soaked up Michael’s touch and tried to soothe the anxiety still radiating from him. There would be time enough for half-explanations and fictional accounts to Forrest, this was more important. “He did catch me by surprise,” Alex left out how the faked text from Michael was the effective lure, and continued, ”but he didn’t leave me to die. He left me in a place I had been before, with my phone. I’m fine, just a little tired, okay?“

“I’m sick of his fucking games.”

“Me too, but he’s just trying to drive us apart. Trying to prove some sort of point about weaknesses and attachment.” The superiority of the alien race over the humans was a frequent subject early on with Mr. Jones, before he realized just how deep-seeded the connections were between Max, Isobel and Michael to Earth and their human friends like, Maria, Kyle, Cam, and but especially Michael’s friendship with Alex.

Close, hard-fought, friendship.

Michael pulled back, to look in Alex’s face directly. His honey-dark eyes were blood-shot with worry and lack of sleep, but warm with resolve. “Well he won’t, and he’s wrong. You’re my strength.”

Before Alex could reply, he heard the front door again. This time it was slamming shut. He winced in acknowledgement, the small amount of patience Forrest had was gone and so was the man himself. That would require some damage control of all kinds, but first, Alex allowed himself to be fussed over by Michael, who ushered him back into the bathroom for more first aid. 

[Dedicated to @adiwriting, @haloud, @christchex today ]

[angrycowboy]

i just need to flail for a moment about this.

because it’s making me think of 1x06. and malex in the shed. malex nervous and excited and just connecting in this indescribable way. and we see them smiling and laughing and kissing. and it’s light and it’s happy.

and they’re in this safe space of alex’s. the place that alex goes to get away from everything bad in his house. the space that he has tried to carve out for himself in the world. and he’d decided that day behind the bleachers that he was going to invite michael into it. he was going to open up this safe space he’d made for himself and let someone in.

and alex’s house. it’s the adult form of the shed, right. it’s his safe space. we saw in s2 that with his father still alive, he didn’t trust that jesse wouldn’t try and invade that safe space again. alex had cameras all over for this reason. and jesse still waltzed right in and snooped around after he and flint kidnapped alex. because alex’s fears were correct - his father couldn’t be trusted.

but jesse is gone. jesse is dead. he’s never going to hurt him or michael again.

and there’s this moment we see, right? and alex is just... that smile! that laugh! it just reminds me of 1x06 and two giddy seventeen year old boys who are finding each other and exploring this connection they have and radiating happiness. they can be together now, and there’s nothing that’s going to walk through that door and stop them now. now they can take a moment and just be together, the outside world be damned. 

and i think that’s really beautiful.

[djchika]

Burn the World Down, a new action thriller starring Tyler Blackburn and Michael Vlamis.

Rated R-13 for violence. (tbh I don’t know ratings we’re just gonna use that to be safe)

[priceysdaman]

It’s the way that Vlam and Tyler talk about each other for me🥰 I adore their friendship SO MUCH! ❤️

A couple other parts I liked from some of the interviews including vlam teasing about guerin in s4 and malex

And I liked what chris answered here

And here

Just a couple of things that stand out to me and I can’t wait to see what happens with s4! :)

[queermil]

I used to move in fast to erase my past But it never works, no, it never lasts, no In my mind, I gotta get things right Take it slow before I jump this time

[bestillmyslashyheart]

2x13 Revision/Coda

Maria couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing. She’d heard Alex sing before but not in years and not like this. This wasn’t jamming out in the car. This was something more. Something real. 

And he was singing straight to Michael.

She didn’t understand the lyrics at first but she saw the way Michael stopped, the way he turned, the way he stared. Like Alex was something holy. Like Alex’s lyrics were the gospel of his soul.

Maria watched and listened. She listened to the heartache and the fight. And finally she understood. She may love Michael and he may love her but what they share was nothing compared to what Michael and Alex felt for each other. They were simply on an entirely different level. In front of her, Michael looked away from Alex and his body started to collapse in on itself. 

Another moment and Michael turned to go. Isobel tried to stop him but he wouldn’t be deterred. 

Maria darted around the edge of the bar and grabbed Michael’s jacket as he started down the hallway.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” She hissed.

Michael shook his head. “I shouldn’t be here.” Next to him, Isobel rolled her eyes.

Maria stepped up into his space and stared him in the eyes. “Alex is pouring his heart out to you right now and you want to leave?”

“He’s not singing to me.” He nodded behind her. Maria turned to see Forrest Long gazing adoringly at Alex, a wide smile on his face. On the stage, Alex’s eyes were searching the crowd.

She turned back to Michael. “If you honestly think for one single second that Alex could sing that song to anyone but you, you’re out of your mind. And you don’t deserve him.” Michael looked away and Maria grabbed his chin. “Listen to the damn song, Michael.”

“Michael,” Isobel prodded. “He’s singing to you. The song is about you.”

Michael didn’t quite look like he believed them but he did come back into the room so Maria didn’t say anything more. She let Michael stand on his own and leaned her weight against Isobel. The two of them watched as Alex’s eyes found Michael’s. For the rest of the song, neither one of them looked away. 

“I didn’t see it,” Maria muttered as the song came to an end. She cheered with the rest of the bar even as she wiped a tear out from under her eye. 

“They didn’t want you to,” Isobel answered. 

Across the room, Alex walked over to Forrest and said a few words, all the while his eyes were glued to Michael’s. The second he turned away, Michael was pushing his way past Isobel. Both women tried to stop him but he just shook them off.

“Where-?” Alex was in front of them, confusion writ on his face. 

“He went that way,” Maria and Isobel replied in unison, both of them pointing behind them at the door. 

Alex looked at the door then at Maria, his easy confidence from onstage fleeing him already. “That was beautiful, Alex,” Maria told him honestly. “Now go get him.”

“Maria-”

“Go Alex,” she urged gently.

“Idiot thought you were singing to that other guy,” Isobel added.

Alex blinked at her in surprise. “What? Forrest?”

When neither contradicted him he shook his head and pushed past them. Just before the door closed behind him, they heard him yell, “Guerin!”

Maria and Isobel shared commiserating looks, Maria’s a touch sadder than Isobel’s. “So,” Greg sidled up to them, a smile playing at his lips. “You two on board?”

“On board?” Isobel arched an eyebrow.

Greg nodded. “The get-Alex-and-Michael-to-pull-their-heads-out-of-their-asses club.”

Isobel barked a sharp laugh and nodded. “Count me in.”

“Maria?” Greg’s smile gentled.

She nodded. “Lord knows they won’t do it themselves.”

[powderseal]

i genuinely don’t understand why michael hasn’t been allowed to talk about his feelings for alex with ANY of the other main characters this season... like he went 10 years without being able to talk to anyone about it, and then finally last year he was able to talk to max and isobel (and even kyle a little!) about it, and then this season when he’s clearly going through a lot neither of his siblings, his friend, nor his girlfriend EVER think to bring it up or check in on how he’s doing?? and yet somehow every member of alex’s estranged family, despite having no interactions with him, knows that michael still loves alex more than anything in the world??

like the writers would literally rather show michael having (pretending to have?) a super fun time with his friends/sibs/gf at a bar/carnival with no apparent ongoing concerns for alex despite having just left alex chained to a radiator in the custody of a kidnapper who threatened to murder him, all to keep alex safe from a bomb that michael built (against his will, to SAVE ALEX) that is targeted against alex’s family’s dna, than to allow michael to express in front of said friends/sibs/gf that nothing is more important to him than alex’s safety, including the SURVIVAL OF MICHAEL’S OWN SPECIES, or y’know, literally any sign that he’s thinking about alex at all

and i just... it makes michael look bad and it makes everyone around him who is supposed to care about him look worse, and i genuinely cannot tell if the show is telling a story about homophobia or a homophobic story but either way they’re doing a frustratingly terrible job

[el-gilliath]

A Not So Easy Choice

Welcome to the kidnapping fic I’ve been teasing. Thank you to @winged-fool and @bestillmyslashyheart for holding my hand, reading and looking this over, as well as telling me no, you are not allowed to kill any more people.

Part 2 Ao3

WARNING: Implied minor character death (Mimi)

He feels everything in him go cold when he gets the texts. Opening them and seeing pictures of Mimi and Alex, bound with the words If you could only save one, who would you choose? Decide quickly, you only have two hours.

He knows instinctively who’s behind it, there’s only one person who would willingly use a woman like Mimi and his own son to try and get to him. He also knows without a shadow of a doubt that Jesse is one hundred percent sure Michael is going to come to the rescue.

A petty part of him doesn’t want to prove him right. But there’s no way he can leave them in Jesse’s clutches. But if he can only save one of them… How does he choose between his girlfriend's mother and the man he’s loved since he was 17. It’s an impossible choice, which means he needs help. He needs Isobel.

He throws himself into his truck and drives to Izzy’s house. She still lives in the house she owned with Noah, since ‘it’s a perfectly good house’. He doesn’t understand how she can handle it, but then again he never understood Isobel’s overbearing stubbornness. But it has saved her thus far, so he will continue to not say anything. But the day she’s ready to move he’ll be there.

But until then he has other things to think about. Like the fact that Jesse is a torturous madman. The drive from Sander’s to Isobel’s normally takes him 20 minutes. He manages it in 10.

He launches himself out of the car as soon as he’s stopped, making sure the doors are closed with his telekinesis as he runs into the house.

“Isobel! Isobel!”

“Why are you shouting, Michael?” She’s her usual haughty self as she comes into the hall from the living room, looking perfectly put together the way she always does.

“Jesse Manes has Mimi and-”

“Slow down, Michael. What do you mean Jesse Manes has Mimi?”

“I got a text. It has a picture of Mimi tied to a chair but it’s not… It’s not just Mimi.”

Isobel gives him a look he recognizes instantly. She’s given him the look many times over the year he’s been dating Maria. It’s a look she started giving him after the first time she watched him interact with Alex. After the first time she felt what he himself feels every time Alex is around. She doesn’t need to hear his name to know who else Jesse has, she can probably feel it through their bond.

“He told me I can only save one of them. And I only have two hours to decide.”

“How do you know he’s telling the truth?”

“It’s Jesse Manes,” he replies. “There’s no reason to doubt it. And as I said. Pictures.”

“Show me.”

He does, handing his phone over. He watches as Isobel looks at the text, scrolling through the pictures. He feels the deep sigh she releases as she hands back his phone in his gut.

“You need to tell Maria.”

“How the fuck do I tell her, Iz?”

“You just do.”

He doesn’t want to, but he knows Izzy is right. He also knows Maria is at the Pony, doing paperwork. He doesn’t want to tell her, but he knows that he has to.

“Okay. I guess we’re going now.”

-----

He gets another text on route. Who’s it gonna be, alien? The mother or the ex? 60 minutes left with another picture of the two tied to chairs.

He grits his teeth, inhaling and exhaling sharply as he tries to calm down. He’s mad, worried, shaking. Why is it always him?

Isobel takes the phone from his hand, replacing it with her own hand and holding him tightly. She knows exactly what he needs, his sister, she always does. And with Max still being dead… It’s just the two of them. Even if they are coming closer to the answer to that riddle.

“It’ll be fine, Michael, she’ll understand.”

“Understand what, Iz?” he asks.

“That you have to save Alex.”

He very much doubts that Maria will understand that, her mother is her whole world. And Alex. Alex is more competent than Mimi is, especially now with her confused state of mind. He doesn’t know what he’s gonna do if Maria wants him to save her mother instead of Alex. He doesn’t want to think about it.

But it doesn’t matter, he thinks to himself as he parks in front of the Pony and gets out of the truck. He’ll decide soon.

He strides inside the Pony, opening the door telekinetically as he nears it. He knows Maria doesn’t mind now that she knows about his powers.

“Maria?” he asks loudly just in case, he doesn’t want to scare her atop the shitty news he comes bearing.

“Inventory!” She yells back. He still hesitates in walking forward, hesitates enough that Isobel takes his hand and gives him another reassuring squeeze, their connection radiating with calmness. He squeezes back quickly in thanks before he gathers his everything and walks forward.

Maria is exactly where she said, behind the bar doing inventory. She grins widely, putting down her clipboard and getting out from the bar to greet him. She stops when she sees Isobel, their relations might be better but they’re not even close to friends yet, before visibly steeling herself and continuing to give him a kiss. He turns away slightly, so her kiss lands on his cheek and not on his mouth. He just can’t, right now.

“Hey,” Maria asks, brow furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

He doesn’t want to tell her. He doesn’t want to see her face. He doesn’t want to-

“Jesse Manes has your mom.” He blurts it out, no softening, no censoring. Just blurts it out.

“What do you mean Jesse has Mom?” her voice is hard now, the furrowing of her brow deepening.

“I mean he has her hostage. And he’s giving me 45 minutes to decide-”

“Decide? Decide what, to save her? To go get her?”

He looks over at Isobel, just a glance to ask for help but Maria moves her head so he can’t really focus on her. He still sees Isobel mouth ‘Tell her’.

“Michael, wh- why are you even here if Jesse has Mom!” Maria’s voice is rising, panic setting in as she picks up on the fact that he’s completely serious. “If this is true you have to go!”

“It’s true, I have proof,” he says, and tries to show her the pictures. But Maria shuts her eyes, turns away and hides her face. He gives Isobel a helpless look, but Isobel just sucks her teeth before mouthing ‘Tell her’ again. Her face is a harder mask now, her annoyance not showing but still felt by Michael.

“I don’t want to see, I can’t see her like that! She’s already so vulnerable, I just can’t!”

“Okay, I won’t show you but Maria, I have to tell you-”

“No!” Her voice is pitching into screams now. “Just go and get my mom! She doesn’t deserve this!”

He wishes he could close his eyes and not be in this situation, not be in this predicament, not be in this place.

He doesn’t know how to choose, doesn’t know if he can. How do people make choices, like these, and live with them.

“Michael, you have to go save my mom!” Maria screams at him. “Please!”

But it’s not that simple. She doesn’t know that Jesse has another hostage. He doesn’t want to know what she would ask of him if she knew that Alex is also in his father's hand. Considering she knows one hell of a lot of what happened in the Manes household when he grew up.

He knows he should save Mimi, save his girlfriend’s mother. After all, Alex is an Air Force Captain, he’s gotten himself out of worse jams than this and Michael knows he’s probably capable of whatever he needs to do to get himself out.

But the thought of leaving him. Of letting him feel alone and abandoned. It reminds him too much of how he felt when Alex had to leave. So how can he leave him when he had the chance not to.

“What are you waiting for, Michael?! My mom needs you!”

Maria is getting decidedly more frustrated, the anger and fear in her voice clear as she yells. She doesn’t understand, he gets that. He might not have a mom anymore but he gets it.

“It’s not that-“

“If you try to tell me it’s not that simple I’m gonna hit you. My mom is in the hands of Jesse fucking Manes, the reason she’s like this, and you’re hesitating when you can go save her!” she seethes. “I know how he treated Alex growing up, I can’t let her stay in his clutches! It’s my mom, Michael!”

He shares another look with Isobel as Maria mentions Alex. Their relationship is not the best since he started dating Maria, though thankfully he and Maria managed to spare their friendship even if his spiral tried to fuck with that too. But Alex will always come if anyone needs him. And he knows, intimately, just how good Alex is at getting himself out of tricky situations. But leaving him with Jesse when he has no idea if Jesse would keep him alive or not, it shakes him to his very core, like acid burning through the inside of his stomach, like holding your hand over a fire as it slowly burns.

“Maria… I-”

“I’ve done a lot of shit, Guerin. Hurt people that I shouldn’t have, for you. I’m begging you, go get my mom. She doesn’t deserve any of this!”

He looks at Maria who’s watching him with tears rolling silently down her cheek. He doesn’t say anything, just swallows hard as he bites his tongue.

“You owe me.”

And he does. For the shit he put her through, for being stupid enough to try to ruin her friendship with Alex when he pursued her without even thinking about that, for all the times he hasn’t paid at the Pony, for all the times he’s taken it out on her and been in a mood when he’s fought with Alex. He loves her, he adores her. He can do this for her. Alex can get himself out, and he has to believe Jesse wouldn’t hurt him. He can do this to make up for the fact that he will always love Alex more.

“Okay. Okay,” he says, a grimace in the shape of a smile on his face as she throws herself in his arms, sobbing and whispering ‘Thank you’ over and over again. Isobel walks into his line of sight behind her, her patented ‘You’re an idiot’ mask firmly on. He knows he should’ve told Maria that it’s not just her mother that’s at stake, but he can’t. He has to keep her happy if he wants to keep her. She deserves to be happy with what she gave up for him.

He extracts herself from her grip a few minutes later, giving her a smile he hopes looks slightly more genuine, but probably doesn’t with the way she frowns.

“I have to go if I’m gonna do this. I need to get the location.” He kisses her on the forehead, cradling her face sweetly in his hands. “Stay with Isobel, you’ll be safe with her. I’ll be back as soon as I have her.”

He nods at Isobel, waiting for her nod back before he lets go of Maria and walks out of there. He ignores the thought of her frown as he texts the unknown number back, writing simply ‘Mimi Deluca’. He ignores it still when he gets a set of directions in reply. Maybe if he can ignore Maria’s frown, he can ignore how much it’ll hurt knowing that he’s leaving Alex to fend for himself. Even though he doesn’t deserve it, even though Alex always comes through for everyone else. He’ll do what Maria asked him to do and get her mom. It’s the right thing to do.

He wishes he could believe it himself.

-----

Maria watches Michael leave with a sour taste rising in her mouth. She was, she is, distressed, but now that he’s gone she knows there’s something he didn’t tell her. Her psychic sense is tingling, has been tingling since he came in but she ignored it when he started talking about her mom. But now she can’t anymore. Not with that grimace Michael had on his face as he left.

“Why did Michael have that look on his face?” she asks as she turns around to face Isobel. Isobel, who always looks impeccable in both manner and clothes, but right now looks a little nauseous as she looks down on the floor.

“What do you mean?”

It pisses her off that Isobel doesn’t even consider that she can see straight through her bullshit. That’s the thing with Isobel Evans, they might not be each other's biggest fan, but they’re far too similar not to know when the other is trying to lie or deflect.

“What aren’t you telling me?”

“Maria-“

“Isobel. What. Aren’t. You. Telling. Me,” she says. The edge in her tone is hard, and she narrows her eyes as Isobel sighs irritably. But she knows she’s won when Isobel opens her mouth.

“Jesse Manes might have your mother behind one door,” Isobel replies. “But he has Alex behind the other. And by begging Michael to save your mom, you might just have killed Alex.”

The room is silent for a minute, long enough for Isobel to get worried.

She’s deeply relieved that Michael’s already left when Maria lets out an anguished scream shortly after, screaming in anger and grief.

“Why didn’t he tell me?” she yells in between the tears.

“You didn’t give him a chance,” Isobel answers. And she didn’t, with her demands as soon as she heard Michael mention her mother. She still regrets being quite so straightforward when Maria bursts into tears. The only thing she can do is hug her close and let her cling to her as she cries. She just hopes Michael hasn’t lost the love of his life because he thinks he has to do everything Maria asks him to, just because he feels guilty that she almost threw away a friendship for her brother and because he still can’t stop loving Alex, regardless of his feelings for Maria. But Isobel also knows it’s not that easy.

She still really hopes Michael returns with Alex and not Mimi, cruel though it may be. She doesn’t think Michael will survive if he doesn’t.

-----

His heart beats fast as he nears the directions from the text. He can feel it racing in his chest, his breath quickening as he sees the old, decrepit house on the side of the road. He hates that his mind is telling him not to stop, to drive on. To send a text and ask for Alex’s location instead. He hates that he’s unable to let it go, even if he promised Maria.

He wants to go get Alex. He wants, he wants, he wants. But he won’t. Alex can get himself out, he has to. Jesse won’t hurt his son. He really hopes he won’t.

He forces himself to stop in front of the house, getting out of his truck slowly while he listens to his surroundings, listens in a way that Alex taught him to try and make sure nothing bad is hiding around him. He reaches out with his powers too, tries to feel if there’s anything around. But there’s not; as far as he can tell he’s alone. He still approaches the house slowly, carefully, but nothing stops him. Nothing jumps out, nothing seems weird. It’s just an old house on the side of the road, close to falling apart and decrepit as all hells.

It’s creepy. It’s also perfect for Jesse Manes and his own brand of torture.

He opens the, admittedly shabby, front door and looks inside. There’s nothing there. Nothing besides a door to a room that seems to have been switched out lately. The pounding of his heart intensifies, though it’s more of a hard beat than a race now. A hard beat of regret. He pushes onward still, walking over to the door and taking deep breaths. One. Two. Three. The handle is in his hand, and he wrenches it open before he can second guess himself, his telekinesis at the ready. He moves into the room and stops. He can’t help but feel a deep relief course through him.

“Alex.”

The sight of Alex sitting tied up in the chair in front of him makes him want to weep tears of joy. It makes him want to jump in joy and take his face between his hands and kiss him, deeply, truly, as he runs his fingers through Alex’s hair. It makes him want to love him forever.

It makes him the happiest he has ever been before. Before he remembers Mimi. The person he was meant to save. The person he promised to save. Who is now most likely dead. A part of him cries out in fear of what will happen with Maria, now. Now that he’s failed her too.

But Alex is here. Alex is alive. He can’t help but be grateful. It’s who he wanted to save all along.

Alex looks at him with an unreadable look on his face, before he looks down and a soft, sob like sound leaves him. Michael rushes over, talking nonsense as he unties him from the chair.

“Hey, Alex, hey, I’m gonna get you out of here, I swear,” he babbles, helping Alex stand, letting him lean on him as he groans when he puts weight on the prosthetic. Alex doesn’t really say anything, just lets Michael lead him to the car, lets him help him into the car and close the door. He doesn’t say anything as Michael gets into the truck himself and drives away from the old house. Doesn’t say anything as Michael asks him if he’s hurt, or okay, or in pain, just shakes his head or nods where he needs to. It makes Michael feel unsure, makes the grief of Mimi linger in his head because in many ways Alex doesn’t seem happy to see him, just blank. He doesn’t want to know what happened to him before he got there.

“Alex, I-”

“Where are you going?” Alex finally asks.

“I need to go to the Pony. I need to tell-”

“You need to tell Maria about Mimi. Yeah, Guerin, I know it was either me or Mimi. My dad likes to torture me, you should know that by now.” Alex shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “Let’s just… Let’s just go.”

Michael can’t really do much more than nod, especially as Alex turns away to stare out of the window of the truck. He wants to console him, wants to hold his hand and make him feel better. He doesn’t feel like he’s allowed to, given that he didn’t actually pick him.

-----

They get to the Pony half an hour later. Half an hour in awkward silence that Michael can’t seem to break, a silence that Alex won’t break. He’s tried, asking him if he needs food or water or if he would prefer Michael to drive him home. Alex has just shaken his head every time. No answer, no noise, just a shake of his head. Michael is worried, so very worried. But he doesn’t want to pry.

“You don’t have to come in if you don’t want to,” he tries to offer. The derisive snort Alex releases tells him all he needs to know about that suggestion, so he just nods and gets out. Alex is just getting out of the car when the front door bangs open. Maria runs out, tears and hope on her face. She freezes as she sees Michael, as she sees Alex. Michael can see the way her teeth clench, how her hands tighten into fists, how she starts to slightly shake from trying to hold herself together. So Isobel told her then.

“Of course you picked him,” she bites out. “Of course Alex was more important than my mother.”

He looks at her, doesn’t know how to tell her that Jesse gave him the wrong coordinates. If he tells her Alex will hear, Alex knowing he didn’t pick him would be worse than Maria thinking he decided to leave her mother. He won’t think about why that is yet.

“And my mother is left in the hands of Jesse fucking Manes. How the fuck could you leave her with him, Guerin!”

She rages. He lets her. Lets her curse him to kingdom come, lets her yell all her hatred at Jesse and sorrow over her mom at him. He let her down, he knows what. He still can’t help but feel happy that Alex is alive.

“I should’ve known.” Her eyes fill with tears, her clenched hands releasing, her jaw softening. “I knew the second Isobel told me that you would show up with Alex. And I guess I can’t blame you, I know you still love him, after all.”

He opens his mouth to answer, but stops when Alex walks closer to Maria, taking her hands between his. She’s crying openly, big fat tears running in rivulets down her face. But the happy smile she gives him through her tears, her relief to see him makes Michael feel marginally better. Especially when she lifts his hands to her face and lays small kisses on them.

But Alex doesn’t look relieved, nor happy. He just looks full of sorrow and pain. Michael doesn’t understand, especially when a tear slowly rolls down Alex’s cheek as well. He doesn’t know what’s going to come out of Alex’s mouth as he opens his mouth to speak.

"He chose her," Alex answers for him. "He just didn't know Dad switched who was behind which door.”

All the air in Michael’s body stops circulating at that point. His heart beats faster in response, his hands start sweating, his nerves tick behind his eyes. No, no, no no nononononononono.

Alex scoffs. He extracts his hands from Maria’s, whose eyes are wide, shocked and distraught. Just like Michael feels to his very core. “I’m sorry about your mom, Maria. But I’m not sorry I’m alive.”

Michael can only watch in horrified shock as Alex turns and walks away. All thoughts of Maria are gone.

“The worst part is, I would’ve picked you,” Alex says as he stops a few feet off and looks back at Michael. “I always pick you.”

Michael doesn’t think he could feel worse if he tried.

[captainsassmanes]

Any thoughts on how the Michael/Maria breakup will go? I think we’re somewhat in agreement that they’ll be together in season 2 (although what a trip if that’s wrong) but I dunno how they’ll ultimately end.

I’m not a Maria fan at all but, personally, I wouldn’t mind her realizing Michael’s not actually over Alex and second to break it off. I have no idea how they’ll realistically salvage the Alex and Maria friendship otherwise.

Full disclosure: this is for theorizing and fun but also cause I need break up ideas for fics LOL

[lire-casander]

i’ve been working, as you may know by now, on my @alterarnm fics, and being the overachiever that i am, i’ve been trying to write tons of fics for this event. i’mnot sure if this isn’t going to backfire on me. but whatever. 

please find below the cut the beginning of my third western au, although with a twist.

Michael can’t believe his good luck, for once. After a time of failure after failure — of becoming the familyʼs disappointment, some sort of a joke to tell during gatherings — heʼs finally hit the jackpot. He tells himself that itʼs because he deserves good things coming his way, but heʼs also aware that Maxʼs downfall has had something to do with Michael’s sudden rise in the family business. 

He rubs a hand over his face, the other trying to tame a wild curl that often falls into his eye. He doesn’t want to think about how Max had gone awry, choosing an Earthling over his own family, betraying their legacy, and then dying in an attempt to bring some human back to life. It isn’t lost on Michael that Max had fallen in love, Max had made a decision with his heart and not with his head for once, but itʼs also not lost on Michael that he wouldn’t have had this chance had Max been alive. And it doesn’t say much about Michael’s ability to keep his head above the water — nor about his familyʼs non-existent faith in him. 

But now heʼs finally made good on his promise to rise from his own ashes. He’s finally done something that would make Max proud of him. And Michael still craves his brotherʼs approval, even from beyond the grave. He dreams of what Max would say if he saw him now, standing tall against the light of the bridge of his own ship, sailing the universe chasing the bad guys and bringing them to justice. 

“You’re giving me a headache,” Isobel tells him from behind, a sudden presence that makes him flinch. “All this overthinking, it’s going to kill you.” 

“If Karantian booze didn’t kill me, I donʼt think overthinking will.” 

“You were younger back in Karans,” Isobel points out, stepping forward and placing a hand on Michaelʼs arm. He stops fiddling with his own hair and allows his hand to fall to his side, guided by Isobelʼs strong grip. “We hadnʼt really found you in Karans. This is different.” 

“You say that as though I was lost.” 

“Werenʼt you, Michael?” she says softly, squeezing his arm. A silence falls upon them for a few minutes before Isobel sighs and turns away, back to her chambers.

[roswellprompts]

Prompt: Michael is a mechanical engineering grad student on work placement at the VA while Alex is in the process of being assessed and fitted for his prosthetic.

[lexicorn2]

Okay so Rosewell New Mexico gave me some feels especially Malex (I mean who didn’t get some feels right??) and I’ve just been kinda analysing stuff and I have a question. Does Maria actually know Alex and Michael have been together since high school? Or does she think it ended after high school and the reunion brought back memories and they’ve been talking and maybe getting back together. Alex felt hopeful for the first time since high school and maybe she interepreted that as him and Michael getting back together but then Michael says it’s over 1000%. I’m not trying to justify the finale but more question it. We the audience know about Malex and their history and (some of) their story but does everyone?? Max knows Michael had feelings but could’ve assumed it was like him and Liz. Isobel didn’t know. Liz didn’t know. Kyle figured it out but he was around them together the most out of everyone. I dunno I feel like the list of things the whole group doesn’t know about each other or the story as a whole is a big thing. Like did Max and Isobel ever know Michael lived in his truck? Did everyone know how truly awful Jesse manes was? Does everyone know about Noah? Does everyone know that the aliens killed Rosa or that they thought it was Michael/Isobel for years? That Rosa is Kyles sister? The many secret bunkers? Or even their abilities? The atrocities at Caulfield? A large part of the show was the fact that no one talked to everyone. Some people know some stuff but others don’t. Which is again my point with the Maria stuff. Yeah it’s a real shitty thing regardless of when Malex were together or not but maybe the next season opens with Maria having a conversation with Alex that’s basically “hey so I’m into your ex from high school and you guys are 100% over and have been for years so is it cool??” And Alex is like “um we were literally together on and off for 10years and are more going through a rough patch as far as I’m aware?????” And Maria is all “oh well Guerin said you guys were over and I thought you broke up years ago and didn’t really pick up again at all but did not know any of that I’m gonna kill him 1000% shitty friend so sorry” Yeah that was a long rant but I just have questions and I kinda don’t wanna see everyone especially Alex get super hurt by stupid love triangles. Which are stupid and useless and not something grown adults who are 30 years old do.

[angrycowboy]

I've been trying to sort thru my feelings on this messy CW show about alien cowboys that I adore so much. Fair warning, this is literally just my ranting and my thoughts on Malex and Miluca as I try to work through them.

Post-season finale there have been a bunch of interviews with Carina. But there is one that stuck out to me. In it, Carina talked about not falling into harmful stereotypes regarding queer characters, but also making sure to make those characters flawed and human. And in regards to Michael and Alex, as well as Isobel, I believe she has truly suceeded. RNM has three queer main characters with different life experiences, that make them relatable in different ways, and are nuanced enough that no one person is ever going to relate 100% to them. And that part of the show makes my queer heart so fucking happy.

This of course got me thinking about and talking to others about harmful stereotypes surrounding black characters, and in the case of RNM - black women. Because where RNM succeeds with it's queer characters, it fails with Maria DeLuca. The show, I believe, had a great opportunity to take the stereotypical "strong black woman" trope and turn it on it's head. And for almost two seasons, it seemed like it could very well head in that direction. Specifically when the show introduced the idea of "Maria DeLuca is her own savior" in 1x09.

I am definitely all for the idea of needing characters to grow, and learn, but the execution here was bad. Mainly because of the uneven attention paid to Malex vs Maria, and by extension, her relationship with Michael. Because it's important to remember that just because Miluca was a straight-passing ship, that does not make it "just another m/f relationship." Not when Michael is a bisexual man, and Maria is a black woman. And asking that Miluca (or even any relationship Maria enters into) be given the same depth shouldn't be a controversial statement that puts people on the defensive. Fans should not have to constantly demand better treatment of the show's only black character. Making Maria half-alien should make her integral to the plot, and we should have seen her alongside Michael, Alex, and Isobel as they went about discovering their shared family history. Instead, it’s felt like the show has dragged it’s feet in including Maria into the main plot. 

Given the uneven pacing of the show, which leaves less room to develop it's character beats, you do have to pay a little bit more attention to truly get at the depth of the relationships between characters on the show. And make no mistake, Miluca had build up, and Michael has genuine feelings for her. But the show failed in several places with them. To make it believable that Miluca was more than just a stepping stone for Michael, Miluca should have been given more emotional beats the same way Malex is built up. Because now the show has played into the stereotype that the black woman is nothing more than a helping hand.

One thing that the show could have done differently was the handling of the Miluca break-up. Some knew it was coming, specifically because of Carina's loud support for Malex (something also understandable at the same time as a relationship she created), but it directly conflicted interviews where fans should see Miluca as it's own relationship separate from Malex. How do viewers and fans do that when 2x13 ended with showing that Miluca was in service to Malex all along? You can't. It's made worse by removing Maria as a love interest and not giving any inclination that she'll have another any time soon. Because while there is a popular idea that the aliens imprint (something that we see with Nora/Tripp, Louise/Bronson, Max/Liz, and Michael/Alex), we've also been told that Isobel is getting another love interest in her arc, and it can be assumed that Isobel will eventually find her "person" in the same way. So the question remains is, given Maria is now established as half-alien, does this aspect apply to her? Because it's a bad look if it doesn't. And so far, the show has given no indication that Maria, Mimi, and Patricia have existed for any reason other than to be in service of white characters.

I've watched a lot of bad shows over the years, and I am still constantly frustrated by some portrayals of queer characters in the media, but as a white woman, I have no idea what it is like to be a black woman (to say nothing of black queer women) who constantly sees black female characters relegated to nothing more than a stereotype, as well as to deal with fandom racism when they dare speak up for better writing, and better representation of themselves in media. It is understandable to me, why so many Maria/Miluca fans have left the fandom, or stopped watching the show completely. Black fans should not have to constantly settle for mediocre portrayals of themselves in media. And more people need to speak up and understand why these stereotypes that are rooted in systemic racism continue to exist so that change can happen.

The Malex fandom also needs to acknowledge it’s role in this as well. It’s hypocritical to blame it all on the writing, and then constantly engage in ship wars - particularly when the argument then centers around understanding which couple is “endgame” or that Michael & Maria are “better as friends.” Because if fans of the “endgame” ship are certain, there should be absolutely no need to attack, harass, or even engage with, fans of a different ship. And in the case of Malex and Miluca, Malex fans should never have been resorting to the degrading racist insults that were constantly thrown around because Maria was being seen as a threat to a “queer ship.” Insults that also sought to erase Michael’s established bisexuality because Maria is a woman. (Sidenote: I’m mostly referring to tumblr here, as I don’t really pay attention to fandom on twitter/FB/IG.)

[djchika]

I was playing around with animation assist on procreate and this happened... 😭

[djchika]

Yes! Michael and Alex being at peace does not require that they end up together. They’re each their own person with their own journeys qnd I’m here for all of it. However, my little shipper heart is also grateful that the story is unraveling in a way that suggests the peace they’re looking for is in the vicinity of each other and always has been.

“Malex deserves peace ❤️“