#macro micro i guess | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

aihoshiino · 2 months

Text

chapter 155 thoughts

Thanks for your patience! I had some stuff crop up IRL this week that kept getting in the way of my chapter review but we're so oshi no back

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 12

Aqua Hoshigan Status: White

i can't believe toxic yuri was the real core theme of this manga all along

With the long road to revenge seemingly conquered, Oshi no Ko eases us into a bit of a false high before the real finale comes barrelling in. As with 152, it feels like we're tying off a number of arcs that have lasted through the series, with certain characters getting what is clearly supposed to be their big emotional resolutions… and unfortunately, as with 153-4, while a lot of these beats are satisfying on paper, they suffer a lack of buildup that makes them ring a bit hollow. OnK's clumsy handling of certain characters during the Movie Arc has really come back to bite it during the finale, leaving me feeling like a lot of the emotional payoffs for them are undercut and the character work they're doing doesn't have the groundwork it needs to properly resonate. I defo didn't hate this chapter like some folks seemed to, but it has some pretty substantial issues in terms of micro and macro storytelling I am compelled to talk about. This is one of those chapter reviews I think comes across way more negative than it necessarily is lol but man did this one give me a headache…

To start things off, the thing that initially delayed this review: page fucking one!!! By total coincidence, this was the first chapter in basically forever where I didn't get a chance to look at the JP raws until like two days after it dropped and as such I was ripping my hair out trying to figure out who the narrator was on page one - the use of 'Mama' made me wonder if it was Ruby, but the visual flow of the page is much more biased in favor of Aqua and I probably don't need to tell you how fucking huge it would be for Aqua to have called Ai that for the first time!!! However, based on the speech patterns of the speaker in Japanese and the way subsequent pages flow from this intro, I'm pretty settled on it being Ruby - this chapter is a sort of closing of the book on her involvement in the revenge play or as my friend Mala put it, it's Ruby's homecoming so to speak. And like… honestly, thank god lol.

I get a lot of Ruby fans have wanted her to be more involved in this side of the story for a good while but I think the Black Hoshigan Ruby arc playing out like it did made it pretty clear that Ruby as a character is not super well suited to playing a role in the revenge half of OnK in the way that Akasaka wants it to be written. Not just that, but her actual post-BH characterization in relation to this arc has been such a wet fart that I really think it has taken away a lot more than it has added to her arc.

Not only that but… most of it didn't even happen onscreen lol! Not only did we get that absolutely baffling speech in 147 where she literally looked into the camera and Explained With Her Words the character arc she was supposedly having this whole time (just offscreen and nowhere the reader could see) but we now get Aqua going "well ruby decided to forgive him so it is what it is i guess". It feels so limp as a reason for him to have flipped on a dime like he did, especially when we still haven't fucking seen this supposedly lifechanging performance of Ruby's!!!! SO many characters have the resolutions to their Ai-adjacent arcs connected to how Ruby chose to play Ai in the movie but we're not actually seeing it. We're just sort of talking around it and having it exposited to us. I want to assume this is setup for us eventually seeing it ourselves but like… at this point, IS there any point to us revisiting the movie's content? Everything we might have learned from it has already been addressed by characters Telling Us To Our Faces How It Made Them Feel And Gave Them Therapy so it would ultimately be superfluous.

God. I hate still bitching about the Movie Arc now we're out of it, but it really is the albatross around the neck of this finale. So many of the issues littered through these last ten or so chapters are the result of the Movie Arc's fumbling and misuse of the cast and its failure to establish the emotional throughlines that should have been tied off by these chapters. I keep feeling like I'm repeating myself when I talk about XYZ Narrative Beat not being bad on paper but being less effective than it should do because of lacking underlying foundation but it really is the one central thing plaguing this arc right now.

i get what you guys are going for but. seeing aqua just let kamiki walk away when he has definitely killed people is really funny.

The twins' return to Miyako is another moment that I like in theory but honestly just feels frustrating. It's been over 25 chapters - a week short of an entire year since 125 came out where Miyako lamented her inability to reach the twins like a 'real' mother would and this thread was immediately dropped like a rock. She had zero involvement in the Movie Arc even during parts it was straight up absurd that she was not at least reacting to the events going on, didn't have any reaction to the movie or like… anything going on that could have more organically lead to this development.

I also have to say. The twins returning to Miyako performing this Snapshot of Aesthetic Motherhood (as u/DeliSoupItExplodes on the OnK sub put it) felt kind of. Weird and even a little icky to me in a way I've been struggling to articulate. Just that it felt extremely on the nose and kind of. eeeh.

that said. i won't pretend i'm not 4x critically weak to an 'okaeri' / 'tadaima' exchange at the end of a long quest or journey…

For all my complaints about the surrounding context, this scene in isolation is pretty much the one part of this chapter that just uncritically works. It's hard not to read it as a parallel to Miyako offering to adopt the kids in chapter 10 - except there, Aqua refuses to step into his new family. Here, Miyako pulls him into the embrace and the two of them finally engage not as peers but as a mother and son, as they've needed to do all this time. Her words here are so lovely and so, so sincere that it's really no wonder Aqua breaks down in tears. As much as I've bitched about the lacking work in his arc across the last major chunk of chapters, it's nevertheless been incredibly cathartic to see Aqua finally start letting down his walls, believing in his future and letting people love him. I just wish it had the buildup to really land.

also the twins just… still have not had a real conversation or interaction about literally anything lol.

Ichigo's back…! I already aired my major complaint about this scene vis-a-vis Ruby but I imagine this is the last time we're going to get a real Moment with Ichigo so I might as well get this off my chest now: it was and continues to be utterly bonkers to me that of the characters we saw having Feelings about the 15 Year Lie cast screening, Ichigo was not one of them. And it's even more bonkers that we got this whole bit waxing poetic about fucking Kaburagi and how he feels soooo bad about Ai when like… I'm sorry, but Kaburagi's feelings about Ai are so low on my list of priorities as to be functionally irrelevant. Quite frankly, he does not matter and it's INSANE that the story gave this misty-eyed moment to him and not Ichigo - you know, the agent of the industry that went on to exploit and kill her, her literal, actual dad whose guilt over what happened to her made him ghost his family for nearly twenty years? Can you imagine what an insanely powerful moment of resolution it would've been for that moment of Kaburagi addressing Ai through the 15YL poster to have gone to Ichigo instead?

I also have to note this weird ongoing thread of 'the Dome' being framed as Ai's dream that Ruby is inheriting when it, uh, patently was not! I'm sure she felt some pride in her success but all she herself said on the matter back when it came up was that she didn't get what a big deal it was but that since everyone else was happy, she'd be happy too. I initially took this to be laying the groundwork to disprove this idea and make the characters work out what Ai really wanted in her heart of hearts but now the narrative seems to just be uncritically treating this as a value neutral fact. So… who even knows lol.

Short hair Akane returns…! I don't imagine it was planned, but it's a cute coincidence that she cut her hair in the manga right around the time anime Akane grew hers out for season 2. I've always liked short hair Akane best so this was a nice surprise…

I have to say it was uh, really funny to see so many people get so shocked and mad when Akane talked about 'imitating Hoshino Ai' and screaming that this was a retcon or ruining Akane's character when like… was this really news to you guys??? Even before she grew her hair out, she flipped her bangs to go in the same direction as Ai's as soon as she started acting as her and she was popping hoshigans all over the place when she was getting her career off the ground… like, seriously, was this really a shock to people???

Anyway uh. Vindication for me from this scene!!! I've been pointing out for over a year now that we should be very cautious about taking it at face value that Hikaru killed Gorou and Yura because the story has been very delicately implying that to be the case while avoiding confirming it outright in a way that reeked of a red herring to me. That combined with his failure to even mention these two victims while 'fessing up to Aqua really raised some additional red flags for me and finally, we see Aqua confirming that no, Hikaru was not the one person behind everything, Light Yagami style and the final boss of the series seems set to be B-Komachi's former Queen of Smiles. Fuyuko Niino.

And Iiiiiiiii… feel very uneasy about this twist!

First of all; I have to acknowledge that nope, we have no fuckin clue how either Aqua or Akane figured this out but we'll probably get the exposition in that regard over and done with next chapter. Also something a lot of people caught is that Ryosuke is referred to with a different name here - Sugano vs Kaihara, which was used during the Movie Arc. I've heard this called out as a mistake/retcon and it could be, but tbh I'm inclined to think it's just that Ryosuke's name was changed for the movie, since a point is made about needing everyone's permission to include them in the movie and they, uh… can't exactly ask Ryosuke!

But… back to the real point here.

Nino has been one of my favourite OnK characters since I first read 45510 and every subsequent expansion on her character and her relationship with Ai has only made me more invested in her. But the story setting her up as the final villain here is… it leaves me feeling a little cold and very uncertain about how it'll go.

First off, the framing of Nino on these last two pages is just so overwrought that it's a little ridiculous lol. The image of her squatting in her filthy room, listening to old B-Komachi tracks and staring at a poster of the old group with all the other members but her and Ai aggressively scribbled out… it feels downright parodic to an extent that I think honestly makes Nino that much less nuanced and human by its inclusion alone.

Like… a big part of what I loved about Nino's inclusion in the story and how her relationship with Ai was framed was that it was messy and honest in a way that felt like it wasn't judging Nino herself or making her out to be a villain. Her and Ai's relationship breakdown was a two-sided failure of communication spurred on in large part by Ai's own avoidance and inability to have frank, sincere discussions with the people who cared about her. Nino's tangled up feelings of admiration and desire, envy and resentment, love and hate were not flattering but they felt so real and so human. She was a young girl put into an impossible situation and without the power to change the invisible dynamics of the systems around her, she lashed out at the person in front of her that she could see. The impression I always got was that part of what so deeply fucked up her feelings about Ai was her lack of closure - that she had never gotten to say sorry or patch things up. That she had screamed I wish you'd die at someone she loved and then she fucking died. No wonder she was a mess.

All this though… maybe I'm overreacting when we're just a page and a half into this reveal but again, the framing here really does feel so exaggerated and shallow. It feels like it's falling into the trap OnK previously fell into with the GRSR relationship where it attempts to amp up the drama by massively overexagerrating the emotions at play, blowing them up to their hugest possible extreme and letting all nuance and subtlety get lost in the noise. Ultimately, this will all come down to execution and while it's possible for AkaMengo to get us back on track with the Nino I already liked… idk. Like I said. I'm uneasy.

I also can't let it go unsaid - accidentally or otherwise, the framing of Nino here leans extremely hard into the stereotype of the 'psycho'/predatory lesbian and I don't think I need to explain why that sucks donkey nuts, especially in the midst of a manga that is so insufferably hetero at all other times.

at least she has good taste in b-komachi tracks.

#oshi no ko #oshi no posting #chapter reviews #onk spoilers

42 notes · View notes

fictionstudent · 2 months

Text

How to pull off "show not tell"

“Show, not tell” is a common advice that both emerging and emerged writers (lol) hear quite often. But most of us don’t really understand what it completely means, until really later.

Personally, I took the advice by heart. But I had the definition wrong. I thought the advice meant that you don’t write “he was angry” but rather “he frowned”, “he glared” or something like that. And it’s kinda right. But kinda. And you can really mess it up when you only half-know what it means—believe me, my first couple of novels were a mess.

So, you might ask what “show, not tell” even means—what it actually means. And I’m here to tell you everything I know about it.

***

What is “show, not tell”

Well, it’s actually a quite recent writing tool in the industry. I don’t really know how and where the term originated—and I’m too lazy to actually Google it—so I won’t get to that.

I’ve heard and read about this term a lot—right from the time I’ve begun writing. It’s quite famous. In fact, it’s a prerequisite these days. Many beginning writers would have heard this criticism that their prose doesn’t really show, it just tells. It’s filled with telling. You should show, not tell.

So, what does this “show, not tell” even mean? The advice is quite self-explanatory, you see. It’s when you show your characters doing or feeling something rather than just telling your readers what happened. So, on one aspect, it refrains you from narrating your story.

And by narrating your story, I mean the parts where the characters are not moving in real-time, but the writer is narrating what had happened. For example,

And we crossed the seas. The journey wasn’t long, but those days we had nothing to do. We were bored the heck out of our brains. Those days felt like an eternity. Until today, when we finally found what we were looking for—a piece of land in the middle of the Pacific. The Hirohoto Islands.

You don’t do this. It’s okay when a character is telling the story to another character. But a narrator should refrain from doing this.

According to this advice, you actually show scenes of the journey—maybe show that the MC was fiddling with stuff all day long, people were drinking booze or something day and night, and some just stared into the blue oceans day in and day out, until this one guy saw a green dot far away. In fact, whatever I just said can be used quite literally, if you don’t wanna go into the details of the scenes. Yeah, you can even go into more details and maybe write a little chapter filled with such scenes.

But, well, as you could have guessed, it’s on a macro-level. The advice can also be used on a micro-level.

For example, you don’t write,

I was angry at Sara. But she didn’t care.

Instead, you write,

I wanted to kill Sara on the spot. I wanted to choke her, I wanted to stab a knife in her chest. But Sara—the damn audacity! She just stood there, simply staring at me like nothing happened just now, like she never said anything to rage me up like this. She didn’t care about me, did she? She never cared.

The second one is filled with anger. And the dejection that the narrator feels, knowing that Sara doesn’t care about him anyway.

On micro-level, there are two actually two ways to imply this advice. And this is something that I had to figure out on my own—no one told me that there were two ways to do this, no article mentions this.

One way is to use visuals, the other monologues.

***

Visuals

Let me explain. When you see the movie, you don’t witness the inner monologues or thoughts of your narrators. You just experience the way the actors act—the way their gazes shift, their body movement changes, and all that. That’s using visuals. For example, read this scene where the character is just betrayed,

Her fists clenched hard. Her arms were trembling. And her eyes… They tried hard to fight back those tears. But the dam could break any moment now.

You get the feeling that the character was betrayed in some way, and that she was both angry and dejected at the situation. She wanted to cry. She wanted to punch.

But I never wrote,

She was so angry at them. She wanted to cry, but she controlled herself.

The second one doesn’t give us the same form of feeling as the first one. The first one obviously reads better, and everyone would prefer that.

***

Monologues

This is something that’s unique to the art of prose. It’s only in prose that you can witness the inner monologues of the characters, and use them to tell a story. Films, comics, and other visual media don’t do this.

And yes, that’s what I mean when I say monologues. Use these monologues to show what the characters feel, and how they react.

For example, let’s take the previous example where the character has just been betrayed,

She couldn’t believe this. Was this for real? Was this… really happening? Really?

How could someone do something like this? And… And to her? What had she done to be betrayed like this?

Again, you hear what the characters are feeling. You understand their tone. And you emphasize with them this way.

***

Visuals or Monologues - How to choose

Now, you might be wondering that if you can use the “show, not tell” in two ways, how do you choose which one to use and which one not, especially in a particular scene?

Well, for that, read the two examples above again—the ones about the betrayed character. Take about a minute to scroll up, c’mon.

You’d understand that on a subconscious level, there’s something oddly different between the two. It’s as if none of the two really give a complete picture of the scene. You get one aspect from the visuals, one from the monologue. But you don’t really get that the character is actually betrayed until I tell you that before you read the examples.

That’s the problem with using one over the other—you often miss out something or the other. In some scenes, maybe where you use stronger action verbs, the visuals might be enough, while in some scenes, visuals won’t really matter, but rather, the monologue will.

But in most scenes, you’d need to mix the two types. Read this,

She couldn’t believe this. Was this for real? Was this… really happening? Really?

Her fists clenched hard. Her arms were trembling. And her eyes… They tried hard to fight back those tears. But the dam could break any moment now.

How could someone do something like this? And… And to her? What had she done to be betrayed like this?

I simply mixed the two—both visuals and monologues. And now, the prose tells the whole story. It can stand on its own, without me telling the context. It feels complete.

See, visuals and monologues are not two ways to “show, not tell” technique, but rather, are two tools that complement each other. Yeah, you can always use one instead of both, but you don’t need to choose one over the other—choose both. Or rather, choose none, if you think that helps the scene better.

***

A common mistake to avoid

Some writers often make this mistake that you should try avoiding. This mistake is really hard to notice, sometimes, but with practice, maybe you can learn how to solve it.

And that mistake is that you often show and tell. For example,

She was angry. She glared at him, her fists clenched hard, like she’d just punch him in the face and get this crap done with.

It’s two sentences. Notice this—the first sentence clearly tells you that the character is angry. And then the second one shows it.

This way, you’re repeating the action twice. The reader would make one mental image in their head when they read the first sentence, and then you make it up for them, in which case, they’d need to adjust that image. That’s not how you make your prose flow.

Never repeat action. An action that happens once in the prose should be mentioned once. The later sentences can expand on it, but not mention the action again. Repeating actions happen a lot in “show, not tell”, and sometimes, it’s not so easy to point it out.

***

Solution

I’ve recently got a hold on this “show, not tell” advice too, to be honest. And as someone who’s recently cleared its basics, I’d admit it—it’s tough to just go and start implementing it.

Therefore, in my current WIP—in which I’m really making sure I follow this rule—I’ve developed a technique that might work for you too, for someone who’s just started out.

Don’t care about this rule in the first draft. You can tell as much as you want in your first draft—go for it. In fact, that’s what I’ve been doing currently too.

But when you’re done with the draft, mark all the places where you think you’ve told and not shown, and then when you’re writing the second draft, just replace all the telling parts with the showing parts. Simply replace them all, and rewrite.

It’s that simple, really.

Even if you’re far into your project and now feel you’ve not really stuck with the advice and messed up, don’t scrap the whole project. I’ve always scrapped projects because sometimes I felt I messed up quite hard, and that’s why I’d advise you not to. In your case, simply go for a re-read, mark the telling phrases, and re-write them. You’re done.

***

Conclusion

I hope this article will help you guys. I also wanted to talk about why you should follow this advice of “show, not tell”, why the readers today love it, and when to actually break this rule to tell stuff to the readers. But I thought that it’d deviate this article too much, so I stuck to the basics. I might talk about the other stuff in some other article.

Anyway, see you around!

#writers and poets #writing resources #writing help #writers #writerscommunity #writeblr #writing community #writers on tumblr

36 notes · View notes

midnight-talescape · 1 year

Text

𝒲𝑜𝓇𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 (𝒜𝓇𝒸𝑒𝓊𝓈 𝓍 𝑅𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇)

Kinktober Day 1: Macro/Micro

Guess who’s back? It's me, your favorite nut job! I’m your favorite I don’t care I don’t take objections So yep day 1 and I’m back to Poképhillia *sigh So yeah we're fucking god now, go big or go home I guess. There is a prequel for this smut, the question is will it happen? There's a plan to have it written on a different blog, if it happens I will stick a link somewhere.

Warning: Poképhillia, size differences, probably a lot of pain, also uh he called you child a few times because he’s like a god and all I’m not sure if I should put that in the warning but here it is, I have regrets, etc, etc you get the point not for kid

Genre: filthy filthy smut

Word Count: 1821

｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡+☆+｡･ﾟ･｡

You walked up the mountain and toward the temple of Sinnoh carrying a basket of berries in your hand.

A few months ago you met Arceus when you were lost in the forest.

Does that make any logical sense?

Absolutely not, but so does many things in this world. Also, the fact that after seeing the almighty god instead of running away, or idk try to catch him you choose to stay and have an in-depth discussion with him about why humanity kinda sucks, probably isn’t normal either.

But doesn’t matter after some offering and lack of self-preservation skills, you like to think of yourself as a friend of god. After all, he seems to be quite fond of you as well.

As you reached the top of the temple, you played the azure flute to summon him. After a few moments, a crack appeared in the air, as Arceus walked out greeting you with a nod.

“Hello, my child. How have you been?”

You hold the basket in front of you to show it to him before saying,

“I'm doing great! I brought you some berries I grew!”

Arceus let out a small laugh as he lowered his head towards you,

“I’m glad, and thank you for your offering. There's no need to do that for me.”

You put the berry basket on the ground, before gently holding Arceus's head in your arm and placing a kiss on his head.

Who would have known god was touch-starved? At least you certainly didn’t until you noticed how Arceus seemed to lean into your touch.

His whole body shuddered involuntarily and his eyes flashed red momentarily, as he felt you place a kiss on his head.

Noticing his strange reaction to your kiss, you ask worriedly,

“Are you okay, my lord?” he had never had such a strong reaction to your touch before,

Arceus looked at you a blush on his face as he unconsciously leaned into you more,

“Y-yes, your touch was merely a little…unexpected…”

You looked into his eyes which seemed to be flashing between red and green, before backing away slightly.

“I’m sorry, are you sure you’re okay, my lord? Your eyes are…different”

Arceus seeing you back away looked up almost frantically,

“Don’t… don’t apologize… don’t leave… come closer, my dear…”

Hesitantly you nodded before hugging Arceus's head in your arm.

“Is this better?”

Arceus groaned into your hug seemingly fighting an internal battle with himself. Struggling he pulled himself out of your arm before backing away, despite his heart telling him to never let go of you and demand/beg for more kisses.

“L-leave child, before-before I do something I regret and hurt you” Arceus panted out seemingly losing the battle,

You being a stubborn person, refused.

“I'm not leaving, my lord you’re not acting normally, is there anything I can do?”

Hearing your word Arceus's eyes went fully red, losing to the desire inside him. Tremblingly he walked toward you pushing his head in your arms again.

“I-I need to feel your touch, my dear. Your soft lip and your warm embrace. Pl-please, child. For the love of the god that you worship, please kiss me. I need you, (y/n)”

Hesitantly you hugged back. Placing several small kisses on his head as Arceus continued to tremble in your arm.

“I-i will do something unforgivable, my sweet child, I am not worthy of your praise or your love…” Arceus cried out as tears began to form in his eyes,

You kiss away his tears trying to comfort him as you get increasingly worried.

“Hey, it’s okay. Nothing you do can be unforgivable, please don’t cry.”

With a shudder Arceus pulled you into his chest(?) with his foreleg, don’t ask me how I don’t know the most powerful being in the universe having lost all control of himself because of you.

“My dear…my love…you are my angel. Please don’t forsake me, I need you. I need your touch, your kiss, and your everything. Please give me your heart and your soul. Let me be your god, let me be your love. Love me as much as I love you, my dear angel…”

Your eyes widen at his words, before giggling and standing on your tip-toe to place a kiss on his face (?) I don’t think he has a mouth? Trust me I have tried googling

“Then as you wish, my lord.”

You had no idea what you just agreed to…

Arceus pushed his leg in between your leg, grinding it against your clit. Gently poking it and pushing you down onto the ground.

You let out a loud whine as you felt the force pushing down at your sensitive fold. Your eyes teary and your face flushed as you let out a little moan. The pleasure was unlike anything you have felt before. You can feel your panties getting soaked as he grinds against your cunt with his foreleg. The cold metal on his leg grows warmer from your body heat.

Seeing your reaction Arceus let out a satisfied purr, glad that he can bring you this pleasure.

As you get closer to your release you can’t help but beg,

“F-faster…haaa… please, m-my lord… s-so close…”

Arceus was happy to comply, and within minutes you were brought to your first climax.

As your fluid splattered onto his foreleg, Arceus's eyes began to fill with an animalistic need and lust.

You panted on the ground, your eyes dazed and your mind blank from the high. Arceus ripped off your clothing and flipped you around to push you down on all fours.

I had to do some math and googling but yeah, someone's gonna be in a world of pain. And no I’m not proud of my search history right now

“W-wait, pause! Backtrack, backtrack!” you yelled hoarsely as you tried to back away once you saw his cock that's beginning to harden, it look about 2 feet long and it's getting bigger,

Arceus dragged you back forcefully, any emotion other than lust disappeared completely in his eyes, transforming him into a completely different Pokemon. One that is controlled by his animalistic desire.

“I will destroy you, my angel.”

Arceus said with a sinister tone, as he held you onto the ground.

You let out a scream as he begins to push inside you, your body shaking violently as it is forced to accommodate something it’s not supposed to take in.

With a snarl, he pushed your face into the ground as he forced himself into you, inch by painful inch.

“I-i will die! Please, f-fuck! Haaa…” you cried out your mind blank from the pain,

Hearing your cry of pain seems to bring back some clarity to his mind. Lowering his head and placing what will be the equivalent of a kiss on your back, Arceus begins to use his power to transform your body so it will be easier to accommodate his size. Or at least enough so that you don’t die in the process.

“You won't die, my angel. You belong to me and only me.”

With another growl he slammed his cock into your tiny body, shoving another half a foot of it into you. You let out a wail as your stomach bulges out, the head of his member can be seen through your stomach.

With each thrust, his member seems to grow larger inside you. You can no longer tell how much your body has taken in. Your mind is daze with pain and pleasure, as your body is pushed to the limit and then some more.

Every time you thought you had reached your limit and will surely die if he shoved more of his cock into your body, your body will stretch to accommodate it, because of his power.

You shake your head begging him to stop,

“N-no more! Full, so full!”

Ignoring your cry Arceus continues to thrust inside you roughly.

“You will be mine, angel. Just me and no one else!”

He was almost entirely inside you, was it 5 or 6 feet by this point? You honestly don’t know. Your visions are blurry and you can’t feel your legs anymore, how will you ever recover from this?

The pain and pleasure were overwhelming, every thrust seemed to bring you to another climax as well as another round of pain.

After who knows how long Arceus's thrust got sloppier and rougher as he began to reach his release. By this point, you couldn’t fight back or cry, your mind long past broken. You let out a silent scream and tears fell from your eyes. Arceus let out a roar before shooting his cum inside you, painting your wall white and filling you to the brim.

Your stomach is bloated and you whimper as you felt yourself being filled. After a while Arceus's cock soften and he finally pulled out with a pop, as an ocean of creamy white liquid came rushing out of you.

The red in Arceus's eyes faded and his eyes returned to his usual forest green. As Arceus returns to normal, he looks down at your battered and abused body with horror, finally realizing what he had done to you.

Shakily Arceus cradles your trembling body inside his arms.

“What have I done… my love… my sweet angel… please tell me you're alright…” Arceus pleaded as he began to use his power to heal you up,

After a few minutes, you finally gain back some of your consciousness and with a pained groan you look up at him.

“Y-you just shoved something that's basically bigger than me if you are taller than 6ft just ignore that, also please donate some of your height to me inside of me, I will say I’m a little broken…”

Arceus lowered his head to nuzzle your body to try and comfort you.

“I'm sorry, I’m so sorry… please forgive me, my love… I didn’t mean to hurt you…”

You wrap your arm around his head as you ask with a hoarse voice,

“At least you remember to change my body so I don’t die in the process… what came over you? That wasn’t normal…”

Arceus froze before hesitating and answering quietly,

“There's… there's a part of me… a different part of me that's more ruthless, more aggressive, and less caring… I try to repress it, but I can't and I lost control of you… I’m sorry, I will never let it happen again…”

You nodded your head before leaning on his head,

“That's good to know, I’m not sure how much more time can I take off this…”

You let out a yawn as your eyes get droopy, your body tired from the event that happened prior.

Arceus nodded and sensing your tiredness he wrapped himself around you protectively,

“Sleep, my dear angel. You have been through enough…”

With a nod, you slowly drifted off to sleep in the arms of god…

#kinktober #x reader #no i don’t have problems #reader insert #reader smut #pokephillia #pokemon x reader #arceus x reader #kinktober 2023

134 notes · View notes