#lust love and other liabilities

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Ok but what if

What if Ghost was a knight (again) and then there's a spoiled, presumptuous lady who's bored (again)

She's the kind of princess who was dearly loved because she was a girl. No one knows why, because everyone knows girls are a liability. But she has been treasured and sheltered all her life, she always got everything she wanted, and now she's stupid enough to fall for Simon who has lived a life full of war and torment and who is not the kind of stray dog you would want to feed.

Our poor lady doesn't know she's playing with fire when she's toying with her father's (Price?) most loyal soldier: a brooding, tall, broad man who got his knighthood after this campaign or that. This outlander, Simon, catches her attention because he rarely speaks and never smiles, but makes her smallclothes wet because he has an ill look about him: a broken nose and a thin lipped, downturned mouth. This sir is looking everyone from under his brow like they're mere children in his eyes. The only time she's heard him speak is when he's barking orders in the courtyard.

She teases and teases and teases him: flirting every chance she can get, giving him soft brushes that barely remain within the bounds of propriety. She bestows heated stares that linger a little too long, she licks and parts her lips when they walk past each other in the cold, dimly lit corridors of the castle. He never returns any of her flirts.

Except the stares.

She can feel his eyes on her even when she's not looking. That coal-like stare is fixed on her wherever she goes: it's hot and cold at the same time, like embers that are kindling under long-forgotten ashes.

He's interested… But only in a way that a hungry, beaten, suspicious dog is interested when it's staring at a meaty bone, trying to decode if it's a treat or a trap.

He finally has enough one day when she dares to smile at him: softly, knowingly, like a whore in a tavern.

The gauntlet closes around her neck like an iron collar. She can smell the horses and the sweat and the dirty leather as the man she has dreamed of seizes her and pushes her back against a wall.

"Is this what you want? Hm?"

She finally hears him speak: dark, gravelly, and borderline exhausted from all the games she plays. Were he to hold her a little more tightly, she would call it a choke, a soft and slow strangling. The intensity is enough to make her heart flutter and her stare escape somewhere to the grey stone wall. There's no way she can meet that heated stare, now filled with flames and lust.

The knight she used to fantasize about is about to snap. The stoic, cold man is about to lose control at any given moment, and she's about to lose her maidenhood along with that shattered self-control.

He presses his whole body against her: leather and steel and hardened muscle, all that rough, well fed, thick flesh forged in countless battles is pressed against her frame like she is nothing but a flower. Her woolen dress is a poor shield against all the hard ridges of his armour, the pommel of his sword digs into her side painfully, but she pays it no mind. There's something equally as hard and demanding pressed against the apex between her legs. She's forced to rise to her toes from the way he drives his swollen cock up her cunt, and even if there's layers and layers of clothing between them, she can feel the heat of him.

"'S not a good idea to tease a starved dog," he snarls while watching her lose her confidence. All of it, because it was only ever a charade. A silly daydream of a silly young woman, just an attempt to distract herself, a pastime game that happened to turn into a dangerous obsession.

And he growls. He actually growls like a hound when she's suddenly so weak she can't even provide him with an answer. It's a dark rumble that meets her chest, a hot, slow breath that passes across her frightened skin. She feels like floating: his cock raises her from the ground as he tries to fuck into her through their clothes. The ironclad hand has never even seen mercy as it turns her head to the side for him to have a good sniff of her neck and hair.

"Sir," her lips tremble; her whole jaw is making it clear that she's about to cry soon. There's not enough stones on the wall for her to count if he decides to take her here. "Simon…? Please, sir. I'm a virgin…"

[medra-gonbites]

Wounds of Love

A one shot chapter about Lae'zel's obsession for the wizard and her way of coping with it.

Pairing: Lae'zel x Gale

SFW - Fluff, Fighting

Words: 2028

She was truly thankful to have found Tav. That she would never admit either. Despite their lenience and their abhorrent preference for diplomacy over efficient offensive, they had proven time and time again to be an adequate leader. [...] Their traveling companions, however, were a liability to say the least. A bundle of weaklings, pernicious and lying to cover their own hind. Not a hint of bravery and battle prowess safe for the giant fiery Tiefling who despite her combat skills was too naive and kind for her own good. The worst of them being the wizard. Not able to lift a sword with his puny arms and constantly yapping about anything that flourished in his human head. It seemed to be flooded by never ending thoughts given how he would consistently share them with everyone. And yet that night, Lae’zel thoughts could not stray away from him.

Read the rest on A03 or below the cut!

I always thoughts that Gale and Lae'zel have great chemistry.

They talk a lot, ask each other questions. I think Lae'zel might be the only companion that does not roast him (might be wrong but if she does she does it significantly less). Gale is always very interested in her culture and curious to learn more.

I like to head canon that she initially despise him because of his gentle side and his tendency to yap endlessly but his power and intelligence won her over eventually (and she is mad about it!).

image source: my screenshot (they are so cuuuuuute).

Crèche K'liir was located in the darkness of the Realmspace floating among the tears of Selûne; this was an hostile and barren plane although not deprived of beauty. The rocky asteroids formed a constellation in its own way, a trail of coarse dust peppered across the void of the nightosphere. It was a brutal sight that awed anyone that could witness it.

Harsh. Unyielding. Magnificent. Lae’zel shared such traits with the environment she had evolved in.

She had followed a violent and unforgiving training that had seen most of her peers dead. She had herself slain several of her fellow trainees, githyanki warriors born from the same clutch of eggs as hers. “Siblings”? That’s how they would be referred to by the simple beings of Faerun. Tav had called them that. They had judged her for ending them. As it was some kind of immoral thing to do. It did not matter what they thought of her. Lae’zel did not expect such a fragile creature to understand the way of the Gith. She had unquestionably followed her schooling under the stern guidance and unwavering (“cruel”?) tutelage of her instructor and as a result had excelled.

Her thirst for knowledge only barely equaled her lust for blood and besides her intense and daily training, she found time and interest to roam her crèche’s library. She had read many books about the other planes, other races, other histories; there was no tomes left untouched, no page left unturned. By the time she had left her crèche she had been sure she knew enough about Ghaik, and the outside world to properly operate it.

She had been wrong; but no one would ever hear her admit to it.

She was truly thankful to have found Tav. That she would never admit either. Despite their lenience and their abhorrent preference for diplomacy over efficient offensive, they had proven time and time again to be an adequate leader. Without them, she would have probably struggled to navigate comfortably around the area. The tieflings would have been easy enough to handle but a waste of energy to deal with, especially given the presence of many other foes such as the goblins, gnolls and her own people who had turned on her.

Their traveling companions, however, were a liability to say the least. A bundle of weaklings, pernicious and lying to cover their own hind. Not a hint of bravery and battle prowess safe for the giant fiery Tiefling who despite her combat skills was too naive and kind for her own good.

The worst of them being the wizard. Not able to lift a sword with his puny arms and constantly yapping about anything that flourished in his human head. It seemed to be flooded by never ending thoughts given how he would consistently share them with everyone.

And yet that night, Lae’zel thoughts could not stray away from him.

She could not stop thinking about their last fight.

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In the early hours of the morning, the group entered the shadow-cursed lands, a territory more dire than Lae’zel had anticipated. Their exploration of the area led them to a secluded corner. The terrain was difficult, the vegetation, untamed and arid creeping and piercing soles and skin. Lae’zel froze an instant. She thought she saw one of the bushes move.

She did.

Fast and ferocious, a horde of shambling mounds and needle blights ambushed them. Isolated from the rest of the group as she often was, walking in the front line, Lae’zel fell at the mercy of the thorny and poisonous vines. Before she could draw her sword, a knotty branch struck her across the cheek, missing her eye by only a few millimeters. The whip of a vine seized her wrist as she was reaching for the pommel of her weapon. With great force, she was pulled to the ground. She hit her head hard. Prone on the floor for a second too long, the sharp and unforgiving thistle of a cursed sapling hung above her head, ready to pierce through her skull.

A booming voice broke through the never ending night of the cursed land.

A massive fire ball flew across the air, brushing past her, warming her skin in its path, before crashing in the enemies, set ablaze, growling and withering into piles of charcoal and ashes.

Lae’zel turned to see Gale. Eyes sharp and focused, brow furrowed, sweat pearling on his temple, hands and arms tight, finger dancing in the air. Pulling strands of weave he summoned the elements from the void of inexistence. A lighting bolt smited the foes down with a crack of thunder as low as his voice.

Lae’zel could not take her eyes off the wizard, awed by this vision of raw power and ruthlessness.

----------------------------------------------------------

The vision replayed in her head as she stirred in a bed roll. She tossed and turned until she couldn't take it any longer. She escaped the constraint of her sheets and furiously stomped towards the wizard’s tent. She entered the pavilion and paused to gaze at the man at her feet, his face serene, in deep slumber. How dared he sleep so peacefully when he had cast such a vicious spell on her.

She kneeled down and shook him indelicately. Gale woke up with a startled grunt and an alarmed expression etched on his face. His eyes darted around before they got used to the dark and settled on the githyanki bending over him.

“Lae’zel? What’s going on?” He asked puzzled, his voice hoarse from sleep.

“You have infected me wizard.�� She hissed.

At these words Gale looked even more confused than a moment ago. Lae’zel enraged as he laid his brown, warm eyes on her. She wanted to strangle the fool; maybe then she could graze her hands against the soft brush of his beard.

“You have invaded my thoughts. More than the ghaik parasite prowling around in my skull. More than the lich queen Vlaakith who shaped my mind and soul. I close my eyes and it is you that I can only ever see. It is your face that appears to me when my mind wanders.”

Gale's breath itched. His chest heaved with audible sighs betraying an elation that she desperately shared. A pink shade flushed his cheek and his mouth stretched into the faintest of smiles as he stared at Lae’zel expectantly. She wanted to bite these grotesque lips of his; she wondered how they would look moist and glistening in blood.

“I wish nothing more than to cure myself of this affliction you caused in me.” She continues.

She suddenly stood up, she towered over the mage, fist around her sword, the white of her knuckles a telltale of her determination. Gale recoiled and murmured something to himself. In a flash, a gleaming golden halo enveloped his body. Whether he knew where this was going or not, his first reflex had been to protect himself. Good. That would prove smart for him.

“Up!” Lae’zel ordered.

Hesitant and refusing to move, Gale was scrutinizing her, attentive to the slightest movement, the smallest twitch that could start it all. He reminded her of a deer caught in the eyes of a wolf. That such a tender man was at the heart of her obsession. Revolting.

“What are we doing exactly?” He cautiously asked.

Lae’zel rolled her eyes. Talking, explaining, devising. He would never leave things unspoken. She would indulge him this time. If only to hear the sound of his pathetic voice: a music that made her stomach jump.

“We fight. I test you in battle. Bruise me so that you can possess me.” She snarled.

The pair remained immobile for a few seconds, not daring to move. The tension was growing tangible in the small tent. Gale squinted at her.

“Quite the predicament you’ve put me in tonight…” He whispered.

With a speed she did not foresee, he reached for his quarterstaff by the side of his bedroll and raised his hand in front of him. Lae’zel did not get the chance to move and was swept out of the tent by a wave of weave that sent her toppling to the ground outside.

The combat had started.

As she was collecting herself, the wizard ran out of the tent, flinging a firebolt at her. Back on her feet, Lae’zel dodged the fiery projectile and ran towards her target, her blade in hand held behind her to give it momentum. The blade swung in the empty air, cutting through a cloud of mist as Gale appeared a few feet behind her, already signing the next spell he was going to cast.

Before he could utter the necessary incantation, the warrior focused her psionic powers and sprung in the air. An extraordinary jump distracted the mage. In awe of such athletics he failed to realize the gap between had been bridged. Lae’zel struck him on the shoulder with the edge of her blade. Blood splattered on the floor. Gale dropped his staff and fell to his knees with a pained groan.

Lae’zel prepared to strike again. victory seemed to be hers.

She seized her sword with two hands and raised it high above her head. With a swift swing, the blade began its baneful descent towards the wizard. And then nothing happened. Despite all the might and will she could conjure, her arms hung in the air uselessly, her sword fixed mid-blow, never to finish the strike she had started. Incapable of moving the rest of her limbs nor her head, her eyes glanced to her feet with difficulty. A purple square was encasing her, shining a bright hue on the ground. Gale got back to his feet, wheezing, holding the gushing wound in an attempt to prevent blood from flowing out of it.

“Apologies, my love.” He breathed.

As he articulated the next spell, Lae’zel heart pounded, admiration and apprehension thumping in her core in unission. She braced herself and welcomed with tensed muscles the deflagration that engulfed her. The full force of the explosion hit her with a bone shattering impact yet could not make her budge out of her weave prison. She felt the flame lick her skin and the heat burn her lungs. Through the dancing red curtain she could see Gale, hand raised dousing the fire, a fine pellicule of snow leaving his palm and taming the flames.

As he released her from her magic trap, Lae’zel fell to the ground, exhausted, barely conscious. Gale quickly retrieved a healing potion from the camp storage chest nearby and rushed to her side. He uncorked the vial with his teeth while holding her up, and poured its content into her open mouth. Lae’zel felt her body mend itself from the wounds of her fight.

She reached out to the wizard arm and brushed a few fingers to the fabric of his clothes, damp with blood. She looked up to his eyes. His warmth was flooding her with joy. She knew she should feel ashamed from such a blatant defeat, yet she could not resist the surge of adoration that was filling her heart, threatening to explode in her chest.

“Are you ok?” He wearily inquired.

“You were incredible…” She replied.

Her finger trailed their way up from his blood-stained shoulder to find the soft threads of his beard. With the pad of her thumb she gently brushed his lower lip.

“ ‘You are mine’. Say the words.” She demanded.

Gale swallowed. He caressed her cheek with the back of his hand, gently wiping the blood and sweat off her skin. He tucked a strand of her hair away. His fingers delicately traced the lines and curves of her ear.

“You are mine.” He whispered.

Their lips met, with a shudder of euphoria swelling from one to the other. Under the starless night of the shadow-cursed lands they sealed their promise. For the first time, shivering under the touch of her lover, Lae’zel felt more than a desire to dominate, more than greed, more than lust. In Gale’s arm she felt pleasure and warmth. Joy and affection. Safety and peace.

Is that what they called “love”?

[hottpinkpenguin]

I'm in desperate need of sub Thranduil × dom fem reader

Don't care what it is, but i need to see this man put into his place tbh

Slap him, pull his hair, peg him, sneak up on him, drag him away to a secluded area, make him get on his knees and beg. Literally anything 😭😩 Luv ur work

A/n: there's nothing here but toe-curling smut :) hope you love it. MINORS: THIS WORK IS NOT FOR YOU!! DO NOT INTERACT. 18+ only.

Crawl To Me

Sub!Thranduil X Dom!FemReader (gotta be honest, Daddy Thranduil doesn't stay sub forever)

Warnings: smut smut smut, absolutely not even a whisper of a plot, P in V, creampie, squirting, dom/sub vibes, smacking - Word Count: 3646

You jerked upright against the carved wood of the throne, catching yourself just before slipping into sleep. The council of advisors assembled around the dais stifled chuckles at your reaction. The bard from Lake Town who was serenading you and your husband, Thranduil, didn’t notice. He pressed on, his reedy voice warbling over the painfully mistuned notes of the cheap lyre he plucked. You’d appreciated the gesture of appreciation from the residents of Lake Town for the role your people had played in rescuing them from Smaug almost twenty years ago, but after a long and tedious day of presiding over the business of Mirkwood, you desperately needed some excitement in the throne room to grab your attention. Next to you, Thranduil watched the bard serenely, his expression hovering between interest and fondness. He didn’t react at all, although you knew that he had sensed your uncharacteristically obvious disruption. Although you knew you should have been paying studious attention to the performing bard - like your husband - you found your restless mind wandering to other distractions. His handsome side profile did nothing but further escalate your scheming mind. A wicked smirk spread across your face as a plan took shape. Get rid of the bard, and release some of this damn pent-up energy. 

As the plan took full form, you knew that Thranduil was tracing the direction of your thoughts. He could feel your eyes roaming across his face, lingering on his full mouth, remembering the feeling of his lips discovering every inch of your skin… down the long line of his throat and over those broad shoulders that you loved to cling to as his fingers and tongue and cock drove you wild with pleasure… drinking in the sight of his long, smooth hair, imagining how it would feel twined between your fingers. With a shudder, you dragged your distracted mind back to the throne room, uncrossing and recrossing your legs in the other direction, savoring the barest hint of friction in your legs. Thranduil marked the motion, his eyebrow raising imperceptibly. He knew you too well. It was almost a damn liability, and the knowledge that he could sense your awakening lust made it even harder to focus. You sensed his consent in the soft curl at the corner of his mouth and the way his long fingers ran over the smooth wood of the throne’s carved arm in languid, teasing circles. The image of his fingers sent a flicker of warmth curling up your spine from deep within your core. Biting down on the inside of your cheek, you forced your focus away from your husband and back to the crooning bard, resolved to wait until the two of you were alone later that night to see your plans fulfilled… 

**Three Hours Later**

“What do you think you’re doing?” You demanded, stepping into your bedchamber and closing the door behind you with confidence. You heard the guards outside quietly leave to reposition themselves further down the halls, granting you and Thranduil privacy.

Across the room from where you stood, Thranduil froze, his hand mere inches from the green velvet robe he’d been reaching for. You’d timed your entry well; you’d entered just in time to find him shirtless, stripped down to nothing but his soft linen trousers, moments away from covering his exquisite frame in the robe you’d gifted him at the celebration of your marriage anniversary the year prior. 

He heard the note of demand in your voice. He turned half to face you before you issued another command. “Don’t look at me,” you purred as you crossed the room to him. The muscles of his upper back flexed in anticipation as you approached. The sight of his body tensing in your presence was intoxicating. Your fingers came to rest gently on his muscled bicep, tracing a line along the ridge of his shoulder as you whispered in his ear. “Does my lord wish to be commanded, or take commands this night?”

You knew before he answered what he would say; the obsequious way he held his eyes from meeting yours told you that he was in no mood to make decisions. But, nevertheless, it was your practice as a couple to express your wishes in words, even if you were so attuned to one another that a mere glance could say more than your mouths ever could. 

“My wish is only to please,” he replied softly. His blue eyes burned as he turned halfway to face you. “I will do whatever my lady commands of me.”

Your blood sang at Thranduil’s concession. You felt your smirk deepen as the plans you’d been scheming of in the throne room clamored for your attention. Where to begin?

“As you wish,” you replied smugly. 

“Turn to face me.” You took a step back from Thranduil, allowing him to turn and face you fully. The candlelight danced across his muscled torso - a sight you drank in greedily. You kept your eyes glued to him, lingering on the trail of dark hair that started below his bellybutton, tracing a path downward to the part of him that you wanted the most. Your skin danced with heat as you undid the corseted laces at the small of your back, your dress loosening around your shoulders. You shimmied out of it, leaving the embossed black and silver fabric in a heap upon the floor. The cool of the night air mixing with your appetite for release made your skin pucker in goosebumps. You saw Thranduil’s gaze begin to move up the expanse of your bare legs before you issued your next command.

“I said, don’t look at me.” Your words burned with taunting, the feeling of power growing as you saw Thranduil’s expression crumble in disappointment. His eyes fell back to the floor. 

“Your job, right now, is to listen. Can you do that, my lord?” Confusion flashed across his face. This wasn’t your usual fare, but you were set on a path and wouldn’t be turned from it now. He nodded once, swallowing thickly. 

“I can’t hear you, Thranduil,” you continued seriously. He shifted with frustration as he replied, “Yes, my lady, I can listen.”

“Good,” you cooed, stepping back until you felt the bedframe connect with the backs of your legs. You sank onto the mattress, spreading your legs wide and displaying your naked pussy to him. Although his eyes never left the floor, you sensed that he knew what he was missing by the way he chewed his bottom lip, a large bulge beginning to form in his trousers, just below the flat planes of his lower stomach. His hands twitched aimlessly at his sides, almost as if asking your permission.

“You’re not to look, or to touch anything, without my permission,” you added, relishing in the way Thranduil, Elvenking of Mirkwood, the most powerful and regal being you’d ever seen, crumpled in begrudging submission at your words. He nodded, biting down harder on his lip, eyes glued obediently to the floor.

“I can’t hear you,” you said teasingly, one of your hands coming to cup your breast, the other snaking its way down between your legs. Wetness was beginning to accumulate at your center, and you ran your fingers through it. The soft, squelching noise was quiet, but you knew Thranduil heard it. His eyes widened, almost darting upwards before he caught himself, swallowing down a muted moan. 

“Yes, my queen,” he replied. 

“Good job. Kings who follow orders always get rewarded.” You let the promise drip sweetly off your tongue like thick honey. Thranduil shivered with restraint, his head tilting on his neck as his eyes bored holes in the wooden floor. The bulge in his pants grew as the V-shaped muscles atop his pelvis flexed. His fingers found the edge of the dressing table he was leaning against and curled under the edge, desperate for something to grab. You thought about correcting him - reminding him that he didn’t have your permission to touch the table - but your mind was easily distracted by the sight of him getting increasingly needy. Your breath quickened as your fingers found the sensitive bud at the top of your slit, tracing soft and teasing circles around it. The tantalizing sensation and the vision of your subservient king caused you to gasp softly. Thranduil heard the sound and shifted with discomfort. A small spot of moisture at the end of his erection had formed in his trousers, and his knuckles were turning white where his fingers gripped the dressing table.

“Get on your knees for me, my king,” you commanded. Thranduil knelt almost instantly, his desire to please you so consuming that the floorboards shook under his weight. His cock bounced eagerly in his pants, and the sight only tightened the hot coil that was beginning to build deep in your core. 

You shimmied yourself towards the edge of the bed until your pussy hovered right at the edge of the mattress, your feet flat on the floor and knees splayed wide. Thranduil still hadn’t lifted his gaze from the floor. 

“Crawl to me.” The command was so delicious that just hearing yourself say the words pitched you an inch closer to your own orgasm. Thranduil’s eyes flashed with blatant desire as he obeyed, dropping to his hands and knees and moving towards the sound of your voice. The sight of him - half undressed, a faint sheen of sweat dancing across his creamy skin, long hair the color of fresh butter gleaming in the candlelight - on his hands and knees at your command was intoxicating. The pace of your fingers sped up against your clit, and you had to fight the urge to close your knees and rub your thighs together. 

He closed the space between you quickly and hesitated. The sound of your wet fingers moving quickly against your slick center filled the room. 

“Take off your trousers.” Thranduil did as commanded, undoing the lacing of his trousers. His cock burst free from his pants with a satisfied groan from you. His length was impressive, and even after the countless times you’d taken him, you found yourself practically mewling for him to be inside you. But you were resolved to draw this out, to extend your pleasure, and undoubtedly his as well. 

“Kiss my thigh, Thranduil.” Your breathing was shallow, your command not quite so drawling as before. Thranduil lept at your words, his hand instinctively coming to grab your leg as he sat upright.

“Tsk tsk tsk,” you interrupted, momentarily moving your hand away from your clit to slap his arm down. “I said, kiss my thigh. Not touch.” 

Thranduil looked half-crestfallen, half-crazed as he nodded with a quiet murmur of “yes, my queen” before he pressed his lips to the inside of your knee, his hand returning to the floor. 

“Higher,” you ordered. “And close your eyes.” Thranduil did as commanded, his eyelids fluttering shut as he traced a line of kisses up the inside of your thigh. You brought your fingers back to your clit, letting your head fall back against the mattress. Your orgasm was close, and you had designs on how to get yourself there. 

“Keep going,” you murmured, your voice rising in pitch as you felt yourself climbing up one side of your climax. Thranduil’s lips were close to the seam of your thigh, so close you knew he could smell your sex, perhaps even taste you. 

“When I tell you to, I want your lips on my pussy,” you heaved out, eyelids fluttering closed as your fingers strummed needily against your clit. Your toes were curling under, your calf muscles clenching as your thighs began to shake. 

“Say the word, my queen.” Thranduil was so close to your center that you felt the deep baritone of his voice vibrating at your core. The sensation plucked just the chord you needed, and as you felt yourself beginning to come undone, you cried out. “Now!”

Thranduil’s mouth was on your pussy before the syllable had tumbled fully from your lips. He lapped and sucked and ran his tongue over and into you. Your orgasm crashed onto you like a thousand cresting waves, your ears filling with cotton as the earthly world fell away for a moment. You grasped at Thranduil’s head, pulling him harder against you as your walls fluttered and your thighs quaked. Your cries turned silent as Thranduil’s tongue sent you into bliss over and over again, the sounds of his slurping and groaning against your slit the only thing left tethering you to the moment. You drifted there for a while, catapulting from one trembling orgasm into another, until you didn’t recognize the words your lips were trying to form. Everything turned to a shimmering vapor except the mouth between your legs. 

You felt yourself beginning to fall back into your body, your legs collapsing in exhaustion. Thranduil, much to your delight, had stayed true to his orders and kept his eyes closed and his hands unencumbered. You propped yourself up on your elbows, enjoying the view as he lapped at your juices greedily. His mouth and chin were wet with your sex, his cock so swollen it looked painful. Gently, you pushed against his forehead, breaking the contact of his mouth with your pussy. He pushed back somewhat, but your insistence won out, and he eventually sat back on his haunches, chest heaving slightly with exertion and desire. 

“Well done, my king. I wonder, is it time to reward your obedience yet? Or should we play a bit longer?” Thranduil grimaced at the prospect of enduring more time without being given free reign to touch you and fuck you. You smirked, rising up from the bed on slightly quaking legs. 

“Lie down.” Thranduil hesitated briefly until he caught up with your plans. With an eager grin, he rose from the floor and got on the bed, lying on his back. His cock lay against his stomach, its veins engorged, a small drip of precum oozing from its head. You felt yourself clench automatically at the sight of him, your core desperate to feel his girth inside you, stretching you. 

You straddled him on the bed, deliberately letting your hair fall around your face and tickle his neck and shoulders. You hovered your pussy a hair’s width above his cock, letting the heat from your center dance across his member. He felt it too, because he jerked automatically at the faintest hint of contact. His cock twitched eagerly, barely grazing the moisture of your center. He hissed loudly, his hands balled into fists as he resisted the urge to grab you.

“Your eyes stay closed and your hands stay at your side,” you reminded him. He nodded, not bothering to answer you at this point. You weren’t sure if he could speak; he was straining not to break the rules and grab your hips to drive himself shaft deep into you. 

You sank slowly, not taking him into you, but letting your folds barely envelope his cock as you dragged your pussy up and down the length of his shaft, coating him in your juices. He groaned, the sound deep and feral. “You are cruel,” he protested darkly, bringing a fist up to his face so he could bite down on his knuckles. You laughed, thoroughly enjoying seeing him so utterly undone by the lightest touch. You sat back, your weight balancing on your knees, freeing your hands to come to your hardened nipples, rolling them between your fingers. The sensation caused you to gasp. Beneath you, Thranduil thrashed at the noise, a desperate growl emanating from his chest. 

“Stay still, my lord,” you told him, one hand reaching underneath you to grab the base of his member, holding it upright until he was positioned at your entrance. He froze, chest heaving in exertion. You let your hips sink slightly, the head of his cock beginning to penetrate your core. Your pussy trembled, aftershocks from your previous orgasms mixing with the shudders of more to come. 

Beneath you, Thranduil’s head was turned, his eyes glued to the wall. His face was contorted in focus and restraint, his brows knitted and his lips pursed. You reached down and cupped his cheek with your palm, gently but firmly turning his face towards you. “Look at me.”

Thranduil obeyed, his winter blue eyes locking with yours instantly. His gaze burned with an intensity you’d rarely seen from your husband. The neediness on his face matched yours, and it was almost enough to make you want to sink onto him. Just a little more play, you told yourself. 

“Tell me you want me,” you ordered. Thranduil groaned impatiently. 

“My queen, you cannot be ser-”

The slap surprised him. You struck him - not enough to damage, but enough to get his attention - squarely on the cheek. Without giving him time to recover, you grabbed his chin between your thumb and forefinger, jerking his head back squarely to face you. His eyes were wide with surprise, but beneath that shock you saw that the contact had stoked the flames of desire, just as you’d intended. 

“I said, tell me you want me.” 

“I want you,” he uttered breathlessly. You slapped him again, this time harder. His cheek reddened, but he smirked wickedly before bringing his eyes back to meet yours. You let yourself take him deeper, the head of his cock now entirely embedded in your pussy, your walls tightening around it. You gasped at the stretch, another orgasm beginning to tighten your core.

“Again.” Your lust for dominance was so thick it felt like honeyed wine in your veins. 

“I want you, my queen.” Thranduil’s voice was stronger this time, more insistent. “I want you so desperately I can’t think straight-” he paused to lift his head off the mattress, mouth connecting with one of your nipples. He nipped and sucked on it, quickly and roughly. You cried out, your head tossing back, composure and restraint crumbling. His mouth released your nipple to move to the other breast. “-I want you to scream for me-” Another rough nip dragged a cry of pleasure from your throat. He was gaining control over you, your body reacting to his touch and his words. And he knew it. His hands ran down your back until they locked over your hips, grabbing you so tightly you knew you’d have bruises there the next morning. “-I want you to cry out my name until your throat is raw.” Holding your hips exactly where they were, he drove himself with a hard jerk upwards until you felt his cock bottom out inside you. Your legs quivered, the sudden sensation of fullness extinguishing all semblance of control you had. You felt tears prick at the corner of your eyes. “-I want you to remember-” another hard thrust, your pussy trembling as you began to cum, crying out his name “-that you may command me-” you were coming undone, words turning to gibberish, legs trembling as your mind went white “-whenever you want-” your legs buckled, your weight coming down on top of him “-but I fucking own this pussy.” 

He stopped talking, his focus exclusively on driving himself up inside you, again and again. You couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak, couldn’t do anything except let him take you. He relentlessly pumped his cock in and out of your core, your pussy squirting each time he almost withdrew from your slit, the sensation driving him mad with lust. He roared with pleasure as he pounded, once, twice more, the third time slamming himself as deep as possible into you and stilling. His roaring turned to mewling. Somewhere in the haze of your own fucked out pleasure you became aware that his cock was pulsating as he emptied inside you. You felt boneless, entirely dependent on his arms to hold you up, his hands gripping your hips with delicious intensity. He gasped as the pulsing in your center slowed, his face smoothing from white-hot climax to the warmth of a hard come-down. He let you collapse on top of him, both of you sick with sweat and your wetness. Your breaths synced and slowly, inch by inch, you both began to soften. 

After a few moments, you felt his strong arms wrap around you. You lifted yourself off his still-twitching penis and lay on the bed beside him, your body pressed against his as you lay your head on his shoulder. From this angle, you could hear his heart beating against his ribs, and you counted each beat as the heaving of his chest gradually diminished. He turned his head, pressing a kiss into your hairline. He chuckled slightly. 

“You truly are wicked,” he murmured appreciatively. You lifted your head, feeling drunk from the aftershocks of your orgasm, and gave him a lopsided grin. 

“You don’t seem to mind, my king,” you shot back. He shook his head fervently.

“Quite the contrary,” he replied. After a few moments of silence, he added, “I think we should have that bard to court more often.” 

You only pretended to be offended as you playfully smacked his shoulder. He smiled, a dazzling sight, before he caught your head gently and connected your mouths for a deep kiss. Before you knew what was happening, you felt him roll you onto your back, his weight coming to press down on your body, his cock already beginning to stiffen again as his mouth set to work on the line of your throat. You were about to protest, unsure if you’d be able to handle any more of him, but he caught your mouth with his palm. He looked up from where he was nibbling on your earlobe, his eyes simmering with an emotion you could only describe as eagerness. 

“My turn.”

[a-d-nox]

what's a mars return?

did you know that you can check more than just your sun's return? any time a planet transits and becomes exactly conjunct your planet (it is in the exact sign and degree it was when you were born), you undergo a planetary return. mars returns happen roughly every 2 years (unless there is a retrograde too). my mars return is coming up this august and i couldn't be more thrilled to shed the lessons of my 2021 mars return chart and step onto a new battleground.

but what can a mars return chart show you?

what are you passion at / what you desire to do. your confidence and lack thereof. sex. what makes you angry / frustrated / aggressive / competitive. your impulsive behavior. where you are dominant / a leader. the challenge(s) you face.

sun

ego, leadership, self-confidence, sex life, focus, creative passions, authority, dominance, individuality, leadership development, dignity, awareness of other's intentions, and self-expression desires/passion.

moon

frustration, passion, desire, lust, anger, survival instincts, care for your unit/squad, where you feel most powerful, your blood family, passionate/lustful instincts, fertility, adaptability, relationship with your mother, menstruation, and habits.

mercury

communication about what you want, verbal inspiration of others, debates, arguments, how you antagonize others, the determination of your mind, physical health, perception, short trips, ground transportation, diplomatic mannerisms, aggressive mannerisms, and profanity.

venus

who you lust over, who you're attracted to, your reception of others' love, empathy/sympathy for others, pleasure, self-love/pleasure, compromise, values and moral drive, and possessions.

mars

passion, desire, confidence, ambition, lust, sexual desire, anger/combativeness, aggressiveness/competitiveness, athletics, temper, impulse, dominance over other, activity / physical energy, and violence.

jupiter

luck at pursuing your passions/desires, wins/successes, opportunity to move into leadership roles / win, who is willing to follow you, expansion of you empire, knowledge of the things you desire / are passionate about, wisdom gained from previous experiences, air travel, how you seek justice, exploration of foreign land, and spoils/profit/gains from what you win/achieve.

saturn

hard work, challenges/struggles, what the absence of your father/fatherly figure is like (mars has no father - read that myth here), lack of confidence, delays in you passions/desires, physical limitations, physical discipline, responsibility for others, physical effort, self-control, physical stability, endurance, emotional detachment (battle compartmentalization), and grudges.

uranus

allis, fluctuation in attitude/confidence, online arguments, physical uniqueness, rebellion, unplanned/sudden occurrences (surprise attacks), independence, freedom from others, p0rn0graphy, shock (usually of the traumatic variety), (battlefield) chaos, disasters scenarios, and fans/followers.

neptune

creative plans/strategies, camouflage and how you blend in, over-sensitivity, selflessness/egoism, retreating, intuition, deception/lies/manipulation, passionate inspiration, and fascination.

pluto

physical transformation, power, sex, 0rgasms, destruction of others, death, intensity, physical magnetism, physical regeneration, infatuation with other, obsession with others, seduction, manipulation of other, how you plans evolve and change, and the liabilities you remove from your life.

1h/asc

how you approach life, physical body, confidence, the initiative you take, your ambition, your behavior, physical alterations, individuality, and passion.

2h

impulse spending habits, passion projects / side hustles, your work ethic, material possessions (spoils), stability, giving/receiving, and resources.

3h

communication, your strategic mind, your perceptions, interests, ground transportation, social media (the arguments you get in and your followings), and short journeys.

4h/ic

homes/houses (raiding homes that aren't yours or location of your own home), family/family roots, and the foundation of your plans foundations.

5h

children, talent for arguing or your passions, creative plans, risk-taking activities, hookups, pleasures/desires, and strategy games you play

6h

physical health, fitness routine, your duties towards others, your hygiene, and analytics/strategy.

7h/dsc

long term relationships, physical attraction towards others, partnerships, allis, known enemies, and negotiations.

8h

major physical transformation, sex, death, changes of heart, your partners resources/assets, seduction, secrets, spiritual transformation, surgery/operations, and trauma (ptsd).

9h

(battle) wisdom, morality/ethics, foreign environments / long journeys, travel, and learning about leadership / your passion.

10h/mc

your legacy, your reputation, long-term goals/plans, mission, responsibilities towards others, authority, expertise, and leadership.

11h

allis, gains, desires, awareness of other's intentions towards you, groups you lead, politics, and interaction with others.

12h

mental healing/health, hidden weaknesses, hidden enemies, k!nks, fears, losses, closure from tense situations, repressed memory, past challenges, and mental restrictions that become physical restrictions.

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© a-d-nox 2023 all rights reserved

[hellsenthero]

Addicted

Joel X Reader

Warnings/themes: Smut, language, hint at an age gap, hint of past violence. (1K words.)

He wasn't good for you, but fuck, he was addicted to you.

MASTERLIST

Written by: hellsenthero

-----

He was bad for you. He was a dark storm cloud, a serpent in the garden. You were sunshine and orange blossoms. He was from another time, an older time. You were new, fresh to all the world had to offer. Your hands were well manicured, and his were covered in blood. He was every dark thing you weren't. You were every good and golden bit that he wasn't. 

He should have left you alone, stayed away. It's what the others whispered to each other when he had his back turned. He knew it, they knew it, but fuck… he was addicted. 

He was addicted to you. Your pretty voice and soft hands, your golden heart and open mind. When you said his name… when you moaned his name. 

He was an addict and you were his drug of choice. You consumed him.

You'd giggle whenever he'd tell you. A pretty sound. An addicting sound. And when he'd show you, his hips thrusting into your own… those giggles turned to moans. 

"Joel!" Fuck, he loved the sound of his name coming from your lips. 

"That's it baby, doin' so good for me." Your hips opened wider for him, taking everything he had to give you. 

"God, please Joel," he loved your begging, when you'd call out to him like he was your God. But you both knew, silently, that he was the real martyr. 

He was so dark and so bad for you, but you didn't care. When he came home from patrol you were always there, waiting to rush into his arms. When he turned his back on the whispering people of Jackson you'd stare them down, daring them, taunting them, all while holding onto his slippery, scarlet hand. 

Red suits him. It's what you'd say when he'd question you. Red's a colour of passion, a colour of courage and lust. He didn't love the idea of it, not until he found out red was also your favourite colour. 

Now he doesn't find red to be that bothersome. 

You're sweet, like honey. He's bitter, like dark coffee and black licorice. Funny enough, you like your coffee black. No cream, no sugar. He's a cup half empty, and you're a cup half full. 

He's tried to tell you to find someone else, someone good. But the words often die on his lips with a single look from you. Sometimes, he swears you're a mind reader. Or perhaps he's just an open book. 

"Don't gimme' that look Joel." 

"What look?" It wasn't like him to play dumb, but around you, he sometimes couldn't help himself. 

"Like you pity me for bein' with you." 

"Sorry baby."

His easy acceptance of your command was another thing that surprised the people of Jackson. Joel was the boss on patrol, the commander. People feared him in town, stepped on eggshells around him and ducked their heads. His hard glare could be felt by everyone. But then you'd run up next to him, grabbing his hand and steering him wherever you wished. You'd take his lead and he'd gladly follow, like a little puppy. His hard eyes went wide, his frown turning up and he'd follow you. 

God, he'd follow you anywhere. 

He never wanted to have someone again, not after Sarah. He never wanted another liability, another person he could lose. He couldn't open himself up to that kind of pain again. So when you met and he saw this bright, shining light of a person… he'd turned you away. Again and again, he turned you away. He was a fucking asshole. He wished he could punch his past self for the shit he'd pulled. Break his own fucking jaw. But despite all that shit, you stayed by his side and slowly, you wormed your way into his cold, dead heart. 

It wasn't until you nearly died one night that he'd finally admitted his feelings for you, it wasn't until that night that he accepted his feelings for you. 

He was on watch when he fell asleep, something he still blamed himself for. He'd fucking fell asleep on his watch and when he woke it was to the sound of your screams. Five raiders had gotten the drop on you, on him. Three men crowded him, grabbed him, while two held onto you. When he saw their hands on you, grabbing you, his rage wasn't hot and burning, it was cold, a frozen, deadly thing. 

You say what he did next was something unhinged, but he doesn't remember any of it. His memories of the night are scrambled. Raiders, darkness, you. You in his arms, you surrounding him, warming that frozen thing inside of him. 

"I'm okay," you'd told him once he had you in his arms. "You saved us. We're okay. I'm okay." He'd almost believed you, until he noticed your black eye. Then he was reaching for his gun, again. Shooting at the already dead bodies. "Hey, hey, stop that. It's okay, I'm okay." He only stopped shooting once you got the gun out of his hands, then you were pushing him down. His back met the cold earth and you stayed over him, filling his vision. 

Neither of you cared about the dead bodies around you when you'd shedded your clothing. You didn't seem to care about the blood covered earth as you fucked and Joel, well Joel enjoyed it. 

That was the night that Joel realized he was hooked on you, that he'd been hooked on you from the moment he'd met you. It was a night of revelations, of claiming, of bonding, and it was probably the darkest side of you Joel's ever seen. It was a possessive side of you that needed to claim him just as he needed to claim you. 

"Joel, baby," the sound of your voice was such a pretty sound and Joel found himself running his good ear towards you, waiting to hear more, needing to hear more. "Come to bed, it's late." With a creak of the floorboards he turned around and walked towards you. You had the covers of your bed already pulled back for him, an open invitation. "What's goin' on in that head of yours?" You asked once Joel was situated. His arms wrapped around you and he pulled you in tight.

"Just thinkin',"

"About?" 

Joel pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head. "About how fuckin' lucky I am to have you." 

Your laugh warmed him from the inside. "Don't you forget it." 

[gingergari]

Saw your Peach AU art and it got me wondering:

What was her reasoning for using the crown long term? Is it a secret that is revealed later? Or are mario and luigi told right away? Does bowser know? So many questions!!

Of course if anything I ask is a spoiler you don't have to answer!

oh my god i forgot to save my draft 😭 i’ll try to remember what i wrote

1. it really wasn’t her decision to use the crown but more of a tradition of the royal family that had gone on for some time. it’s something she learned how to properly use growing up, alongside toadette and toadiko :]

since the mushroom kingdom is rather prominent (major source of healing mushrooms, exporter of the main ? block material, and the transportation pipe hub), it has been the target of conquests before, especially when the ruler was perceived to be as weak as a toad. they aren’t very strong constitutionally, and the mushroom kingdom does not have the best military even in war time, so one of their ‘defenses’ is a ‘human’ with strong magic like peach.

i definitely think it’s not out of the question for there to have been an actual human ruler before the crown began to be used, but that would have been some time ago.

i’m still deciding on how much of a secret this is in the mushroom kingdom. i’m leaning more towards a forgotten fact among her people, as peach is never in public in her toad form but she is nonetheless accepted and beloved by her subjects.

(peasley knows on account of the beanbean kingdom’s relationship with the mushroom kingdom and an early hope that they could be betrothed. this obviously doesn’t happen but they are close regardless. i’m not sure if daisy knows, but i would like her to)

2. mario and luigi are not immediately told, and fairly so. though they had sought out and rescued the princess not long after arriving in the kingdom, the two are still strangers and liabilities that were attempting to return home to brooklyn anyway. toadsworth would’ve had a heart attack if she did 💀 it’s only after they settle and mario starts getting especially close with peach that this becomes an issue. since she’s perceived as the only human besides themselves and daisy, a bit of their relationship seems to be built on the two being alike.

peach waffles and stalls on telling him because of the obvious safety issue for herself but also her fear that she will lose everything with mario since she isn’t what he thinks she is.

and ofc, once mario knows, luigi will know as well.

they do find out, though! eventually! :D

3. bowser absolutely does not know, and it is peach’s imperative that it stays that way. bowser is the main threat to the mushroom kingdom and if there is anything that he can use to obtain victory, he will use it. he is also in love/lust with peach which doesn’t help matters. peach is terrified of the possibility that he finds out somehow, and believes if this ever happens he will kill her.

once the bros know, they pull out all the stops to keep this illusion up in the event that the four are interacting with each other, but this is rare.

(bowser has seen peach’s toad form, though! 🩵 he just doesn’t know it)

[themadisynhuang]

Task #001 — Personality

MBTI: ESTJ-A

Few personality types are as practical and strong-willed as ESTJs (Executives). Known for their reliability and administrative skills, they are good at creating and maintaining a secure and stable environment for themselves and their loved ones. Their dedication is invaluable in many areas, including their own personal growth. Yet ESTJs can be easily tripped up in areas where their rational and practical approach is more of a liability than an asset. Whether it is finding (or keeping) a partner, learning to relax or improvise, reaching dazzling heights on the career ladder, or managing their workload, ESTJs need to put in a conscious effort to develop their weaker traits and additional skills.

Enneagram: Eight

Eights are motivated by the desire to be independent and to take charge of themselves and others. They are assertive personalities and passionate about life, which they approach with vigor and confidence. Eights know how to look after themselves. They pursue their own destiny. These are the qualities of natural leaders, and whatever role they find themselves in, Eights have an imposing presence. They are action people, preferring to ‘do’ rather than conceptualize, and they are ready to make the difficult decisions and accept the consequences if things go wrong. At the same time, Eights believe that people should be encouraged to help themselves rather than relying on others for assistance. ‘Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime’ is a piece of proverbial wisdom that Eights wholeheartedly buy into.

Four Temperaments: Choleric

People with a choleric temperament are typically characterized as being decisive, focused, and goal-oriented. They have a strong drive to get things done and are often perceived as leaders due to their proactive nature and ability to take initiative. Choleric individuals tend to be highly practical, rational, and logical, often thriving in environments where systematic strategies and problem-solving abilities are required. They excel at seeing the bigger picture and setting long-term objectives, often making them excellent strategic planners. However, their high degree of ambition and determination can sometimes be perceived as aggressive or overbearing. They are often seen as domineering, and they may struggle with interpersonal relationships due to their strong will and desire for control. Choleric individuals can also struggle with empathy and may come across as unsympathetic or insensitive, as they tend to prioritize tasks and objectives over personal feelings. Their fast-paced nature and demand for high standards can lead them to be impatient and easily frustrated with others who do not share their sense of urgency or level of commitment. On the positive side, their energy and drive can be contagious, inspiring others to act and strive towards the established goals. Despite their potential to be seen as tough or stern, cholerics are usually incredibly dedicated, responsible, and reliable - when they set a goal, they will do whatever it takes to achieve it. Their decisiveness and ability to take charge make them natural leaders in the workplace, and their confidence and clear vision can help guide teams effectively towards objectives. With self-awareness and efforts to improve their interpersonal skills, cholerics can be highly successful and influential individuals.

The Allignment System: Chaotic Evil

A chaotic evil character does whatever his greed, hatred, and lust for destruction drive him to do. He is hot-tempered, vicious, arbitrarily violent, and unpredictable. If he is simply out for whatever he can get, he is ruthless and brutal. If he is committed to the spread of evil and chaos, he is even worse. Thankfully, his plans are haphazard, and any groups he joins or forms are poorly organized. Typically, chaotic evil people can be made to work together only by force, and their leader lasts only as long as he can thwart attempts to topple or assassinate him. Chaotic evil is sometimes called "demonic" because demons are the epitome of chaotic evil. Chaotic evil beings believe their alignment is the best because it combines self-interest and pure freedom. Chaotic evil is the most dangerous alignment because it represents the destruction not only of beauty and life but also of the order on which beauty and life depend.

Love Language: Receiving Gifts

Your Love Tank overflows with Receiving Gifts. You find deep connection in Receiving Gifts. Tokens of affection are a tangible expression of love. You cherish the time and effort someone put into selecting and presenting a gift to you. You'll likely remember even small gifts for years because of the emotion you attach to it.

Zodiac Sign: Capricorn

Capricorn is a sign that represents time and responsibility, and its representatives are traditional and often very serious by nature. These individuals possess an inner state of independence that enables significant progress both in their personal and professional lives. They are masters of self-control and have the ability to lead the way, make solid and realistic plans, and manage many people who work for them at any time. They will learn from their mistakes and get to the top based solely on their experience and expertise.

[sportsthoughts]

get to know you tag gaaaame

tagged by @timbitshockey <3

do you make your bed? I feel attacked sitting here on my unmade bed. I do try. I am very organised in other aspects of my life. I normally half heartedly fling the covers across the bed to cover it and call it a day. I am a never in the bedroom except to sleep person so I don't really see it until it's time for bed again. And when husband is home he makes the bed very very beautifully and precisely and my efforts are quite pathetic in comparison

what's your job? Professional Feelings Expert. More therapists are tumblr girlies than you'd think. Currently setting up my own practice and doing some various bits and bobs and agency therapy work on the side.

if you could go back to school, would you? Always always! I have to do a lot of ongoing training for work so I think my next thing will either be training in couples work or maybe some nutrition stuff because I'm very interested in the link between mental health and diet atm.

can you parallel park? I have a driving license that says yes but I have not sat behind the wheel of the car since... 2019? 2018? I am quite a liability on the road and have been Banned from driving Mr sportsthoughts' car because I have been known to crash quite a lot. Just as well I like being chauffeured/walking better anyway.

do you think aliens are real? I think there's some bacteria out there somewhere but I don't think it would be life as we'd recognise it.

can you drive a manual car? 99% of people in the UK learn to drive manual and take a manual driving test so they can do both! So technically, yes, I can. I'm not good at it though.

guilty pleasure? Not guilty about it ever but sports! Sports and sports fandom has always been my little 'me time' hobby.

tattoos? Nope! I can't think of anything that I'd like the look of so much I'd want to see it on my skin forever. My taste changes all the time so I would never be able to commit to a design.

favorite color? greens. neutrals. pastels!

favorite type of music? I like a lot of old stuff! 80s stuff, 70s stuff, also currently binge listening to miss swift ahead of the eras tour in London.

do you like puzzles? Jigsaw puzzles? Yes. I find them very soothing. Brain teaser puzzles? No!

any phobias? Spiders. So badly. Anything with lots of eyes. The dark.

favorite childhood sport? Sailing! I sailed competitively until I was about 15 and still get dragged out with my parents a lot. It was an all encompassing family activity that took over basically every weekend of my childhood.

do you talk to yourself? Yes, all the time. I like to narrate my life! Sometimes in conversation with people/myself/man in the sky etc. Often just me talking to me

tea or coffee? Both! One coffee in the morning and probably about 4-5 cups of tea throughout the day. Always English breakfast tea with milk, no sugar

first thing you wanted to be be when growing up? I have never had lofty career aspirations! I have always been quite interested to see where I would end up - and I had quite a roundabout journey getting to my current career! I think I went through the usual phases of wanting to be a popstar or a princess or a mermaid but I never really lusted after work or aspired to grow up and have a job. I still don't lol. I have a very good work life balance and even though I love my job and see it very much as a forever career it is probably the least important part of my life.

what movies do you adore? I have a running joke that I hate watching films I haven't seen before. I am a serial repeater and like to watch the same things over and over. A selection: Lord of the rings - especially the second one Twilight and New Moon Jackass - all of them - Rocky you reminded me of this and whenever people ask about my sense of humour I say "Jackass" and mean it. Live action Cinderella Oklahoma - the stage recording The first three Pirates of the Caribbean White Christmas - perhaps my favourite film ever? Shrek 1 & 2 - another contender for favourite film ever. Any 90s Disney. A Knight's Tale Ferris Bueller's Day Off Hairspray!!! Can't believe I nearly left out Justin Bieber Never Say Never. The first movie I binged watched. That and 1D this is us were on a constant loop when I was a teenager. My poor parents. Tagging @robindrake13 @prettyhockey @icedbatik @coffee-at-annies @cornerihaunt @reavenedges-lies and anyone else who fancies it - feel free to say I tagged you because truthfully I'm nosy and want to know you all

[captainkurosolaire]

Who Dunn It?

Losses and failure are often touted as big you make them. Many carry with them lessons of necessities. Others don't seem to have an end until the universe is done putting you on trial.

The aftermath of a brutal battle left emotions running rampant. A Pirate Captain missed out on several Sun's of the Living. Even the oldest magick of Era's thought loss, couldn't suddenly bring the Captain to a conscious state or functioning. Each night a new Crewmate of what was a promising band of gold, once visited their Seeker. Many emotions ran against him in bed-side as he was fully drowned under a coma.

Doubt crept, reality hit.

Things weren't going to get better, this fairy tale story had come to an end. Gloom rampantly grew, and with dreams on the line... That fact was just too much for many to handle. One dusk, Captain's estranged daughter walked into his cabin. Struggling to swallow as she saw her Father in a state that was ultimately, she felt a sense of responsibility. All that transpired in that dark-pit wouldn't have ever occurred if she didn't still own the bullet on the brother of the man, who her father fought to the brink. That silver-tongued pirate in her father, managed to turn a situation from a potential War of butchery, bloodshed, into a sacrificial battle, laying everything on the line. Her eye's heavy seeing continuous flow of aether flowing through machinery of magitek, pumping nutrients, breathing apparatuses bound to him. She hadn't gained the misfortune of witnessing this side, sure she met him with bandaged arms, unusable ones, but this was something far more critical and concerning. Walking to him with guilt in her quivering voice, "If I didn't act impulsively." She felt the unbridled guilt, falling to his bedside and wept trying to brave restraint. Yet showing an actual Father and Daughter closeness, that continuously was blooming in the most unlikely ways. Always showing glimmers of surpassing not just the Captain but her Grand Father compared to their own youth, their temperaments getting the better of them not recognizing it until things were too far gone, what they love, treasured most in the world drifted from their grasp... She still had a chance to grow beyond to take advantage of history. After settling her conscience she withdrew to her own quarters. While another matey aboard, their emotion was about to hit of dangerous conspiracy. When you witness the closest person you revere, fall in battle. It's personal, if you can't do anything about it that weaknesses seep into you sometimes, to rid it you feel a liability to have it eliminated. Or worse, yet that loss feels as your own. This felt eerily familiar before with the last time Captain was brought to a mutiny. Masked and gloved, a sneaky assailant joined forces with shadow, about to cause a full on betrayal. Taking ethanol fuel and leading a pathway to bed's rest. Before matching a lighter and setting ablaze. A fire broke out, heading and directly sent to extinguish the life of a Captain.

It seemed he was on the verge of really finding himself. Showing that nobody could halt him, he brought happiness to many aboard, got them closer to finding who they were on his own path. Guided the balance between shore and sea. Although there were promise's of ferrying them to their destination of greed they never questioned that he couldn't have gotten them there. Never once showing discrimination under his sail, there was trust and feeling of an actual home despite how diverse the wild personalities were, they were felt universally kindred under his leadership, he even began confronting forces larger than him.

None saw his overall results of change more than his mental-counselor and advisor aboard, Slafhota who continuously checked on him and was out for his well-being. The fact he chose her, over drinking out of the bottom of vices to numb out existence, or channel his self-dismay into lust and fuck it out of him, everything that resulted into temporal remedies that he did formerly, was proof he wasn't hopeless. Her eye's opened in explosiveness as she screamed and charged and shouted aboard, the cabin had a wall of fire. She saw in the corner of her sprint the ember slowly burning through the layers of blankets bundling him. shouted with a tear that fell between the lid's crest, "FIRE! CAPTAIN O' OUR CAPTAIN!" Only on the scene. She doused herself with her own aspect of water magic and without any footwear ran into the engulfing flames her large sea roe frame leapt forth and yanked him off his machinery and pulled him rampantly out of the seething fire and dragged him out against his slumping nature. Everyone accounted for got to the top of the decks and with real unity and a touching mankind's most amenable attribute despite many of them were atrocities, noted monsters hiding their teeth, or they didn't trust each-other none of that mattered in this test as they brought bucket to bucket, took places giving compressions and air to the Captain in this moment they were a fully-empowering Crew. ...But those fumes sizzled out and were doused. Their orbs needed to wander behind their skulls. If someone was willing to do this. How far would they go stuck in the midst of the sea? This was an organized attack of one of their own. Who could've done this? Perhaps taking out the Captain was botched, and ended unsuccessfully. But in this singular motion, whoever was the mastermind, had not only further envenomed doubt but broken everyone's trust. They brought chaos, the purest discord to the ship. An already uneasy atmosphere had taken over. They fought amongst one another after they put Captain back to rest. Questioning even the one who sprung to save him... As often the first on scene. That was curious. Then they even quizzed, his own fleshing-blood in Klethera the last who visited him in their many witness, and had threaten his life formerly, but truthfully this Crew had all partaken in some sort of dangerous accolades, they all could have a motive if one really thought it out. Their combined sense, and reasoning, was all being pin-pointed on one individual in-particular and singled out. Who has done this before? The important check-box in any investigation, History, Motive and Reason. Well, who other than, the right-hand man, the First Crewmate Judas wasn't just providing questioning but being the most-questioned with intent, after-all, a snake like him; the predator of deceit. This is a man who strategically lays plans ahead, at least that's what anyone's initial thoughts would have of him.

Sudden vocal skirmishes of shouts pierced through the veil. A mutiny was going to take place, but in that unexpected, instant after many Sun's escaped. Amber feline eye's awoke, with a dry, voice, "Can ye fucks keep it quiet? I'm tryna' rest." A painful chortle hitting his lungs as he coughed up some smoke. Signs of consciousness returned.

🌊 ♫Overdose♫ - Reference - Last Chapter🌊

[nanalacana]

Good Things Are Coming

She was happy they met again.

She knew it the moment she saw his kind eyes, his pleasant smile. He was more attractive than she remembered. It was late December, cold, and Amsterdam was dressed up and festive.

He evoked a special feeling in her—a mix of novelty and nostalgia. He reminded her of what she wanted to feel with a boy, of the fantasies she had as a young girl. It was the good kind of feeling: safe, child-like, adventurous, something that required hope.

She loved his space. She only wanted to lie naked on his carpet while he observed her. The view outside was beautiful: fireworks flickering and dancing above the buildings, sparkling in the water. But it remained silent in the appartement, as it was well insulated (Label A if you really want to know), with soft music filling the space.

She took drugs. It was that reckless part of her personality, pushing limits or perhaps an attempt at avoiding intimacy. She liked him, and it scared her—especially as he was about to leave.

He made her laugh. She loved that they could argue for fifteen minutes about something as trivial as pairing socks. She loved how he danced without a care for what others thought.

She admired his intelligence, his unique mix of logic and creativity, his sharp analytical talent paired with an inner storm. He was a keen observer, not just intellectually but emotionally. Perhaps that was why he sometimes seemed unsettled. He carried a hunger for life that sometimes seemed to exhaust him. She imagined he was yearning for something difficult to attain: greatness—in his path and in love. She admired his pursuit of his dreams, but she also saw how it at times challenged his desire to settle down. She recognized herself in his struggle and thought of the agony in the never ending lust for life. Maybe they both needed, as Siddhartha tried to teach them, that what is searched is not necessarily the same as is to be found. When we let go of the searching, we might start finding. But it is so hard.

He had so much love to give. Women who saw and felt it—in the way he made love, the way he kissed—fell for that warmth. She was certain of it. It was his gift and his liability. He was aware of his effect on them, and she had the idea he has learned the hard way to be careful about it.

She liked his touch, the tenderness of it. When he said, “We won’t have sex tonight,” she wondered if he pitied her or judged her. She reminded herself that when she feared a man thought her "cheap" or "too much," it was often her own projection—her fears, her demons, her trauma speaking and reenacting itself. Patterns.

Later, as fireworks lit up at hour zero, as she felt him in her mouth she felt happy. Thrilled, even. She wanted to suck his cock for the entire night. But she appreciated that he held himself. He slowed her down. Paused. They sat down, and hugged. She hadn’t expected it. She had estimated him to be more impulsive, but he had restrained himself. It felt like a compliment.

The couch spun slowly on its axis as they curled into each other. She was naked; he was dressed. They were lovers in that moment. But the looming goodbye weighed on her. She knew it would leave her with a small heart ache. Yet she allowed herself to fall in love for a moment. The best feeling. It was a sweet way to end the year.

She liked his taste in music. She didn’t like how he had disappeared last winter. It was an act of anxiety, stubbornness, self-preservation, or perhaps indifference. The truth likely lay somewhere in between.

When she told him about the bad men in her life he was kind. He told her she shouldn’t have any of those. She tried to explain, but she felt misunderstood—or perhaps she found it confrontational.

When he caressed her naked body on his living room carpet, she felt aroused. She held herself back from climaxing for two whole days. It was hard. She wanted her next release to be with him in his space. She touched herself gently. She was wet, both the drugs, and his presence.

He moved his hands down, she curved her body for him. Exposing herself, inviting him. When he slapped her after reading her body’s signals, she felt the familiar sensation go through her. He understood her desires, her perversions. He could be her "killer" too, she learned. He would please her in that way, from time to time.

He was careful, even hesitant. He admitted he feared where it might lead him, afraid of the Killer within. Yet, she could sense he liked it too. The taste of the forbidden was intoxicating—once discovered, it was hard to let go. She wanted to explain, to tell him that everyone carries both Cain and Abel within, but she struggled to articulate herself. She believed that by compassionately exploring those darker parts of oneself—and doing so with another, attentively and lovingly—one could ease the burden of suppressing them elsewhere. Perhaps, she thought, if humans could openly acknowledge and embrace their death drives and passions, they might draw peace closer, both within and among each other. It is in repression, after all, that demons transform into monsters capable of true destruction.

It was late. The new year was here. She felt excited. She liked her life. She loved living. 

Then he told her she has to go. The rejection was slightly painful, though she had anticipated it. She recognized this feeling—the ache of a goodbye with someone whose return was uncertain. All things are finite. Again. He had warned her, and she had listened, but the sting remained.

He needed to move away, to find his place in the world. She understood that well. But she felt so comfortable with him and her instinct drew her to him.

She hugged him and closed the door behind her. On her way home, she listened to Phoebe. Writers and musicians were her truest lovers after midnight. Fireworks illuminated the city sky, but the peak of the night—and her high—had faded. The hour was strange, stirring an uncanny sensation within her. The sights and sounds evoked fragments of both war and celebration, blurring the boundaries between joy and terror.

Her thoughts turned to her Afghan patient, likely huddled in the corner of his room in East Town—trembling, terrified, psychotic, and paranoid. For him, New Year's Eve was the worst night of the year. She had spent years assuring him that the Taliban would never knock on his door here, that bombs would not fall in Europe. But as she walked through the echoes of celebratory chaos, the fragility of her own words struck her. Four years had passed since she made that promise, and now, she was less sure of it's truth.

2024 had been a year of fear and pain. It lingered in the cracks of the world around her, in the uncertain futures of too many people, and in the quiet tremor of her own doubts.

Once home she lay on the couch. Her thoughts wandering back to the elusive lover she was falling for. She noticed even as time passed he kept reminding her of Siddhartha. She was naked again. This time, she caressed herself, her fingers trailing softly over her skin as memories surfaced. She recalled how, instead of fucking, they had shared their New Year's resolutions. It had felt strangely intimate—more revealing, in a way, than if they had given in to their desires.

“This year I’m getting married,” he said, so confidently that she didn’t know how to interpret it.

“This year I’ll pick someone too,” she replied with a smile.

He said they might stay in touch. She doubted it but a part of her hoped they would. But she understood his stance. When ones home is demolished by the evil and ignorance of the masses one must pursue a new place to settle. They knew that very well in the shared history they carried. It was the right and wise step for him.

She stared into the space of her own home. 2024 had been painful indeed, but it had also brought clarity. She felt gratitude. She always managed to land on her feet. But she didn’t want to keep landing alone. She wanted to share a life, intimately, relationally. She wanted love and a shared community.

2024 ended with an open heart. Grief found its place in her psyche. Pain slowly crystallized into a part of her she could reflect upon, rather than being suffocated by.

She could move beyond it. She was ready to love again.

Yes, it was time for good things to come. 

[angstyandromanticwriting]

Embry Hawthorn (an OC) X Fem!Reader Angsty, Cute, and Fluffy Prompt [Full Version]

• Embry’s face-claim is Margot Robbie as Allison Wells, altered using AI Mirror - Duty Calls filter

• This is the prompt in its entirety, as promised

• There will be more!

!TW: Implied suffering from PTSD + Anxiety + Separation Anxiety, mention of death (of loved ones + companions) + death in general/murder, supernatural element(s)/being stuck in an apocalypse, mention of being drugged + raped, implied suffering from depression, elements of self-doubt + self put-down(s), injury detail, presence of weaponry, insult, swearing, mention of previously being abused (by a family member + associate), mention of previously having a poor experience with family, mention of previous suicide attempts taking place + self-harm, jealousy, being ambushed + attacked/violence, near death experience(s), being unconscious, implied sexual occurrence - if I’ve missed any, let me know ❤️!

Embry was terrified; shaking, even, as she hastily walked down one of the brightly lit hallways of the Survivors’ base, her German Shepard Akaya trailing quietly beside her to provide comfort to her whenever she needed it to be given, ever since her father had been killed down in the mines he used to work within. Occasionally, her companion - when she sensed that Embry’s heart was beating too quickly, or her breathing pattern was staggered and uneven - tended to delicately nudge or lick at the palm of her right hand to remind her that she was there to support her, as well as protect her from some of the horrors awaiting the group outside - it hadn’t been too long ago now that the Apocalypse had officially begun, and the Skin-eaters had initiated their process of trying to take over the world by killing all the entities that seemed to be in its way, humans included especially.

She couldn’t even think as she turned a corner sharply, desperate to return to your and her quarters and make sure that you were okay ever since she had gone; she occasionally had to - like the others - go out searching for other possible survivors to make sure that there weren’t anymore out there in need of their assistance, only to find that there were constantly wounded bodies being brought back to their hideout. If it weren’t for you, the bodies would just have been shot; the injured wouldn’t be brought back to be treated, if the Survivors still didn’t know that the bites of the Skin-eaters didn’t actually infect those who were unlucky enough to be the recipients of it, but how you knew was still a mystery to them, including Embry; you were terrified of telling her, despite your and her recent situation.

Akaya whimpered beside Embry, prompting her companion to wince, before she anxiously looked around her to make sure that nobody was following her; she just didn’t want anyone to find out about you and her; your newly developing secret relationship for fear of them deeming you both to be a liability, somehow, to the group, considering the new atmosphere outside of the base was the most dangerous it had ever been, leaving no room for feelings like love or lust to be experienced, or even explored. Although, as she scowled, it didn’t seem to matter to some of the others, like Pedro who had decided to drug and rape you last week - he denied doing it, of course he did, but she knew that he had, and she despised him for it, alongside her closer friends.

“Kaya, stop it,” she commanded impatiently after her companion began to whine again for her owner’s attention and reassurance, “please, I - I need to think, and I can’t do that with you whining the way you are.” Akaya wouldn’t pay attention; she knew what her owner needed, and that was for her heart to stop pounding the way it was, so she continued to try and nudge at her palm, only irritating her even more. “I’m fine, okay?” She continued, her voice briefly trembling, before she turned one more corner, knowing she was closer now to making sure that you were still where she left you before she went out looking for more survivors earlier alongside some of the others. “Just - shut up, for once,” she uttered, though she felt bad for doing so shortly after, prompting her heart to sink whilst her eyes darkened a little, despite the small tears beginning to form within them. Even Akaya whined barely audibly in response to Embry’s remark, and her companion wouldn’t hesitate to crouch down in front of her, setting down her gun as she did to wrap her arms around her dog’s neck; she couldn’t leave such words hanging between them both, especially not after all they’d been through together recently even before the Apocalypse had begun the way it had, a few weeks ago, now. “I’m sorry, okay? I-.. I’m sorry,” she managed weakly, “I just-.. I need you to be quiet right now - you understand, right? I love you; you know I do, a-and you know Cynthia did, too, don’t you?” Akaya would innocently sniff Embry’s face, her kind eyes locking with her’s occasionally as if to reassure her that she understood her owner’s distress, before she tried to lick her tears off of her right cheek, only to have Embry giggle barely audibly whilst a faint smile played on her lips; she could never stay mad at her the way she had briefly been earlier for stressing her out even more than she already was not too long ago, now. “You’re adorable, you know that, right?” She cooed, prompting Akaya to begin wagging her tail, before she barked brightly in response to the compliment.

“Good,” she replied, “I’m glad you do, ‘cause you’re my good girl, aren’t you?” Akaya barked again, her tail somehow wagging even faster, now, before Embry pushed herself up off of the ground. “C’mon, let’s go and make sure Y/n’s okay,” she continued gently, before proceeding down the last hallway after clicking for her companion to follow beside her the way she had been, earlier, before their brief pit stop a few paces behind them, now. As soon as she got to the metal door sealing off her own quarters, opposite the one leading into your own, she faltered as soon as she heard crying behind the door, prompting her heart to sink as she slowly turned to face it, surprised; she didn’t think you’d want to move from where you had been, before, on your bed, shaking and crying, only to get up shortly after she’d gone to move into her own room, but she didn’t mind, why would she?

She only feared what you might think if you saw the pictures she had of her and Cynthia together; she’d kept them, even after her late fiancé had passed away at the hands of one of the Skin-eaters the night before their wedding was meant to take place; the very night that turned out to be the beginning of the end of the world she and the others used to know, and walk upon, now dominated by fleshy monsters and death wherever they went to try and get away from it. She drew in a shaky breath; she didn’t want to think about what happened that night anymore, reminding herself of you, and the delicate kiss you both shared beneath the stars the day before you were violated by Pedro. She couldn’t escape it, her heart sinking again, whilst Akaya eyed her skeptically; fearfully, as her owner warily slid the door open, her shaky fingers making it harder than usual for her to do so, but she wouldn’t stop until she’d finally done it, and her gaze could fall upon you stood in the corner of the room, in front of one of the shelves that contained some of the aforementioned pictures she’d saved from what remained of her probably now fallen home back where she used to live with Cynthia and her parents.

“Y/n?” She mustered up carefully in a voice close to a whisper, but she hadn’t needed to say anything - the opening of the door, as well as clicking of Akaya’s paws on the mental had already given away her presence as you hastily set the photo back down, and looked toward her fearfully, your eyes darker and redder than she’d ever seen them before.

“Ember,” you managed shakily, as if you were testing out the name on your tongue as if you’d not already done so for a little while, now, before your eyes seemed to glint a little, and she couldn’t help, but tilt her head whilst her heart skipped a beat, and a soft smile began to play on her lips again, “E-Ember, you’re - you’re back! I - I thought-..”

You then faltered, a pained expression on your face again, before you hastily shook your head, and ran up to her to throw your arms around her, surprising her, but she couldn’t help, but melt into your embrace whilst she carefully held you close to her in a way that wouldn’t startle you the way physical touch seemed to recently ever since Pedro had hurt you the way he had.

“Of course I am,” she cooed gently, soothing you even more somehow as you buried your face into the crook of her neck, revelling in how it felt to be within her arms again whilst her sweet scent filled your nostrils in the best way possible, “why wouldn’t I come back for you? Y/n-..”

“I - I know, I just-.. I-.. I’m sorry,” you murmured weakly, and she would frown, before carefully holding you at arm’s length so she could affectionately connect her forehead to your own in the best way possible, “I’m so sorry, Embry, I-.. I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” she began again softly, not wanting you to feel as if you had to apologise for anything like that, especially after all that you’d been through recently, prompting her to frown again; Pedro was probably the reason why you had changed the way you had; you’d broken down, all because of what he had done to you, and she couldn’t bear seeing you like this, but she was determined to bring you back to her somehow; determined to make you feel strong again the way she knew you were, before he’d tried, and failed - in her eyes - to break you by doing all that he had done to you recently, “you have nothing to be sorry for - don’t apologise when you’ve done nothing wrong, okay?”

You would appear puzzled by her response, your eyebrows furrowing a little whilst your eyes seemed to darken again, prompting her heart to sink whilst she carefully lifted her right hand up to your left cheek, prompting you to jump in response to the contact for a moment, before you melted into her touch, and smiled feebly over at her, until small tears began to cloud your vision again - you didn’t know why she seemed to care for you the way she did, and knew she always would, believing yourself to be nothing, compared to her, no matter what she tried to say or do in an attempt to prove otherwise following your change in demeanour as a result of Pedro’s raping and drugging you not too long ago, now.

“But-.. I-.. Ember,” you strained out weakly in a voice smaller than she’d ever heard before, and god did her heart ache, until she remembered what she’d been planning on asking you recently, leaving her feeling hopeful again as it skipped a beat within her chest, before blood began to rush up to her cheeks - you could easily say ‘no’, she knew you could, if she asked you to run away somewhere else with her, but she was determined to protect you to the best of her ability somehow, no matter what the cost, and she feared you weren’t safe here anymore after the whole Pedro situation had occurred, only fuelling her to try and get you to someplace she knew she could keep you safe from being hurt the way you had recently, the way she believed as well as hoped against hope that she could, somehow, without being taken away from you herself by the lingering Skin-eaters on the outside of the Survivors’ ‘Haven’ of a base.

“Let’s run away together, j-just the two of us,” she blurted out exasperatedly, unable to hold the question back anymore, prompting you to fall quiet, evidently surprised by the question as you didn’t think she’d want to do something like that with you, especially not considering the situation you both seemed to be finding yourselves in alongside the other survivors, “well..” As Akaya whined, and pawed at Embry’s trousers. “The three of us, including Kaya,” she added; she couldn’t leave her companion behind like that, though she did fear her safety, against the Skin-eaters waiting for them out there, “w-what do you say?”

You hesitated, a pained expression on your face, before you bowed your head a little - it wasn’t that you didn’t want to; you did, but you felt as if you weren’t enough for her, and felt as if you’d only get her hurt out there; you’d only burden her, somehow, even more than you felt you already were, and you couldn’t let the Skin-eaters get to her the way you believed you would if you went somewhere else with her.

“Ember,” you murmured dejectedly, and her heart would sink again whilst her expression faltered, and stunning icy blue eyes darkened alongside your own, “I-.. w-we-.. we can’t - I’m not-.. I’m not good for you.”

“W-What are you talking about? Y/n, you’re more than good enough for me-”

You scoffed, before pulling out of her embrace to take up the picture you’d been looking at earlier, prompting her to tense up for a moment whilst she subconsciously shook her head, and wished she could do more for you to prove to you somehow that you meant more to her than you ever believed you could, but she was terrified of driving you away from her by doing so, especially after Pedro had raped you, prompting her heart to somehow sink even more than it ever had, even after she’d lost Cynthia she was sure it was a feeling she’d never experienced before with her.

“C-Cynthia, she-.. she made you happy, right?” You managed weakly, whilst you walked slowly back up to her, the picture in your right hand, and she would hesitate, before nodding gravely - she couldn’t lie about her, knowing it would feel as if she were betraying her by doing so, though she were no longer here with her the way she used to be, before the Apocalypse had begun, and she had started feeling as if she had nothing left anymore, except for Akaya, before she found the Survivors, and then you alongside them shortly after the group had been formed. “Y-You were perfect together,” you continued dejectedly, knowing you’d never be able to make her happy the way Cynthia had, before she had lost her, “l-look at you.”

She faltered, before glancing down at the picture with a pained expression on her face; she and Cynthia were in the picture together, hugging each other close to one another lazily whilst they beamed over at each other, and she couldn’t bear to see it after all that had recently occurred, though she’d told herself it would be good to keep a reminder of the times she and her late fiancé had shared together.

“Y/n-”

You then shook your head, before picking up another picture, one similar to the other you were still holding, except in this one Cynthia was kissing Embry’s cheek, prompting the tears to begin leaking from your eyes even more; it was painful, knowing you could never make her as happy as her late partner had seemed to, especially after you’d felt as if your worth was littler than it ever had been after Pedro had violated you not too long ago, now.

“I - I could never be what she was to you,” you murmured weakly, your voice briefly trembling, whilst Embry hastily shook her head, before she carefully removed the photos from your fingers to set them down on the bed beside her gun, allowing her to carefully wrap her arms around your waist whilst she affectionately connected her forehead to your own again, prompting you to appear surprised as you glanced up at her, your eyes locking with hers instantly whilst a soft smile began to tug at your lips; you couldn’t help it, despite the situation; she made your soul brighter than it used to be; made you feel as if maybe things would be okay even after all that had happened to you even before Pedro had violated you, as well as the beginning of the Apocalypse

“You are more than what she was to me,” Embry contradicted gently, before smiling lovingly over at you, and slowly lifting her right hand up to the back of your head, prompting you to subconsciously melt into her touch whilst she buried her fingers blissfully within your hair, her eyes never leaving your’s to the point that you couldn’t help, but feel flustered as blood began to rush to your cheeks quite prominently, prompting her to smirk as she knew exactly what the look on your face meant, “is that a blush that I see? Are you - Y/n L/n - blushing? Because of me?”

You would scoff, before hastily shaking your head whilst you averted your gaze again, though she’d already seen that you had begun to blush before you could try and hide it from her, prompting you to wince whilst she raised her eyebrows, and a mischievous glint began to form in her eyes - she wouldn’t let this go, you knew that for a fact, now.

“I’m not blushing,” you claimed, much unconvincingly, and she couldn’t help, but giggle, before delicately as well as playfully brushing her nose against your own, prompting you to beam over at her whilst you revelled in her magical laugh; how it made your heart skip a beat whenever you heard it like you just had, only making your blush even more prominent than it ever had been before, “I don’t blush; you’re the one who blushes, not me-”

“Oh, please,” she interjected a little exasperatedly as she thought back to the kiss you and her shared a couple or so days ago, already making her feel warm and fuzzy all over - the moment had been more perfect than anything she’d ever imagined, something she didn’t think would ever be possible after she’d lost Cynthia the way she had, before the Apocalypse had officially begun, and she’d found herself becoming a part of the Survivors to try and find a way out of it somehow, “I’d never-”

You would raise your own eyebrows, before grinning over at her, and then leaning forward to delicately connect your lips to her soft and perfectly shaped ones, prompting her to falter in speech entirely whilst she melted into the kiss in the best way possible, her heart pounding alongside your own as she recalled in the moment, and found she could no longer think anymore again, her entire being wrapped up completely in you, and your presence before her, and she hoped it would stay this way forever, somehow, as long as your and her future allowed it after it had punished her the way it had regarding her loss of Cynthia before their wedding day.

Once the kiss had sadly ended, she found she could no longer breathe, her eyes fluttering open whilst they locked with your own, and you couldn’t help, but wonder what you’d done to deserve someone so perfect again, but before your heart could sink you noticed that her cheeks did appear somewhat redder than they were before, prompting you to smirk as you appeared elated at actually managing to get her to blush the way you had the night you and her had first kissed.

“You were saying-?” You teased, and she would roll her eyes playfully, before relocating her right hand to your left cheek, soothing you more than anything else ever had before.

“Shut up, you,” she replied, before timidly initiating another gentle kiss, once she knew that you were okay with her doing so as she didn’t want to scare you, or make you feel uncomfortable by doing so, “s-so, would you-.. wanna run away with me, somewhere, or-?”

You would hesitate, worried about her getting hurt again as you feared losing her somehow, knowing that the Skin-eaters were persistent, and wouldn’t be easy to take down or evade at all outside of the base, but you didn’t want to upset her by insisting that it was too dangerous for her and you to attempt to survive, so you thought better of it and instead blurted out a barely audible ‘sure’, but of course she picked up on your doubt, prompting her heart to sink again.

“L-Look, if you-.. if you don’t want to do this-”

“No-!” You interjected breathlessly, prompting her to fall quiet again whilst she intently locked eyes with you again blissfully, as if she were trying to read you; you didn’t doubt that she could - she knew more about you than you knew about yourself, somehow, without knowing everything, and that was terrifying in the best way possible. “I - I want to do this, Ember, I - I swear, I just-.. I can’t lose you,” you whined, “I just can’t-”

“Then you won’t, I promise,” she swore confidently, sure that she could do this for you, no matter what the cost, as she was determined more than she ever had been before to protect you, especially after all that had happened recently with you being raped by Pedro, “I’ll protect you, always, no matter what, and at the end of the day I’ll never stop, because I could never let the Skin-eaters take me away from you.” She then held your hands delicately within her own, whilst you tried desperately to believe her words, but it was still terrifying to you nonetheless; things could easily go wrong, if you and her tried to go anywhere without the others. “Y/n, I-.. we-.. we will always be together, I promise,” she concluded gently, before wincing upon hearing someone call for her outside, prompting her to grunt whilst you appeared disheartened at knowing that you would soon be separated from her again, no matter how brief the separation would probably turn out to be, “just - let me know, if, o-or when, even, you feel ready, and I won’t hesitate to up, and leave with you, okay?”

“Okay,” you answered faintly, before smiling timidly up at her whilst you nodded slowly to show her that you understood, soothing her, before she leaned forward to press a delicate kiss to your left cheek, not wanting to go back outside without doing so, and reminding you that she loved you more than anything, and always would, before she dragged herself out of her and your quarters, and began to feel empty again.

🜚

As soon as she had left the room, your smile dropped, and eyes seemed to darken again; you hated being away from her, but you knew why she didn’t want to tell anyone about you both, knowing it was an awkward situation with the whole Apocalypse going on around you both and whatever, so naturally you fought against questioning it, and pretended alongside her to just see her as an accomplice instead of the woman you found yourself hopelessly in love with. You sighed heavily, before sitting back down upon her bed, and faltering as soon as you noticed that she’d left her gun in the room with you - wouldn’t she need it?

You hesitated, finding yourself staring at it for a moment whilst you debated over whether you should take it out to her, just in case, especially after how Pedro had assaulted you. You tensed up; this place wasn’t as safe as it was being made out to be ever since you had first been brought here - what if he tried to hurt her, too? You couldn’t allow it - you hastily got up off of the bed, the gun in your right hand, before sliding the door open, and rushing down the hallway you hoped she’d taken, expressing relief as soon as you heard her voice nearby only to falter as soon as you saw her crouched down before Akaya, now whimpering as if she’d just been hurt by someone, or something.

“Ember!” You cried upon noticing her, before rushing up to her and Akaya, surprising her as she couldn’t help, but stare over at you for a moment not just out of disbelief, but admiration, but now wasn’t the time to get yourself flustered over such a look as you winced, and tried to hide that your cheeks were beginning to heat up again. “What happened? T-To Akaya?” You managed, and she would falter upon being reminded of the situation, your question breaking her out of the trance she had found herself in a brief moment ago.

“I - I don’t know,” she admitted dejectedly as she looked on helplessly at her companion, “she just-.. seemed to trip up, and doesn’t want to get up, now - I’m gonna take her back to our room-.. s-sorry, my room, I - I didn’t mean-..”

You then frowned, hastily averting your gaze to try and hide that her correction had disheartened you, though you couldn’t imagine why; why did she have to notice the flustered expression on your face the way that she had? You fought back a sigh, before forcing a smile over at her, and timidly placing your hand on top of her right one gently, soothing her as she smiled warmly back at you, her eyes glinting in the best way possible - god, it was so hard not to say ‘I love you’ whenever she looked and smiled at you the way she was, right now; it was killing you, but you couldn’t help, but think - she’s worth dying for, and it wasn’t as scary as it had felt before you’d begun to develop such feelings for her.

“It’s okay,” you reassured her, and she would express relief, an audible sigh escaping her lips, before she timidly inched closer to you, “I - I get it, Ember; I didn’t think-.. y’know-..”

“Well-”

“Hawthorn,” a gruff voice sounded out a few paces away, and you winced upon hearing it, whilst she grunted, and appeared disheartened at the interruption; you’d both not noticed one of the Commanders walking down the hallway, too immersed in each other’s presence to do so at the time, even now finding yourselves unable to unlock your gazes, and hands, until he got closer and you felt you should to respect her wishes, instead focusing on Akaya whilst you forced yourself to withdraw your hand from her right one.

“Commander,” Embry uttered impatiently, before she forced herself up off of the ground, trying not to think about how her heart had sank as soon as your hand had left her’s the way it had, whilst she also tried not to allow herself to think about how your gaze had been withdrawn from her own also - now was not the time for that, and there probably would never be time for that, at this rate, with all these interruptions from the higher ranks within the base taking place.

“I don’t much like your tone,” the man retorted whilst he grimaced over at her, paying no attention to you whatsoever as you tried to provide comfort to Akaya, even partially laying down beside her whilst you carefully wrapped your arms around her, allowing her to whine quietly against your right shoulder - you guessed she just needed to lie down here for a moment with you; that her leg might be paining her after she’d fallen over, as it didn’t look like she’d broken anything, and she didn’t react particularly badly to you examining each of her legs and paws whilst Embry and one of the Commanders were talking, “especially not after all I’ve done for you, allowing you to bring Y/n here back to our only safe place when she could very well have been infected-”

“Well she wasn’t, was she? Look at her,” Embry interjected, before gesticulating over to you using her head, “she’s perfectly healthy, don’t you think? And so are the other people we’ve been bringing in, so I don’t see what your problem is-”

“Then allow me to make it clearer for you,” he hissed, “you’re an ungrateful little wretch who should have been left to die the moment we found her - you’re relieved of your duties, and so is she; you can pack up, and leave tomorrow-”

“But-”

“You’re done, Hawthorn,” he insisted, “you’re a liability, and we can’t keep you here anymore, for all of our sakes; you could easily leave all of us to die, and the rest agree with me-”

“Then you’re all idiots,” she spat, “but I guess it’s fine by me; we were planning on leaving anyway, weren’t we, Y/n?”

You would tense up, appearing shocked by all that had just taken place before you; you didn’t think you and Embry would ever get kicked out of the group like that, especially during times like these - weren’t survivors meant to protect each other with the faintest chance of managing to see the end of an Apocalypse like this one?

“Er-.. I-”

“Good,” he hissed, “‘cause leave is exactly what you’re gonna do - right?”

“Right,” Embry answered confidently, before the Commander grinned over at her smugly, and she wished she could wipe the smile off of his face as he spat down at the ground before her feet, before making to walk back to the surveillance chambers within the base. “Asshole,” she uttered, before crouching down beside you again whilst you timidly glanced over at her, not sure what to say for a moment, “oh well - we don’t need them anyway, do we?”

“What if we do, Embry?” You questioned weakly, and she would falter, a pained expression on her face as she glanced over at you - why would they be needed when all they’d ever done was be cruel to her, and hurt you? Well, those who weren’t her friends, anyway - the others were the bad guys here, aside from the Skin-eaters they each awaited outside.

“Why would we? I thought you said-”

“Okay, maybe I did agree to run away with you at some point, but-…” You then fell quiet, before wincing, a hurt look on your face; you knew you’d messed up, but it wasn’t like you hadn’t thought at all about how perfect things could be if you and Embry both did run away together somehow without being killed in the process of doing so.

“You weren’t actually going to do it, were you?” She guessed, her gaze fixated upon the ground beneath her whilst you hesitated, small tears beginning to cloud your vision whilst you nodded gravely in response to her question. “Y/n-”

“I’m sorry,” you blurted out hastily, your voice briefly trembling, and she would falter, wondering why you were apologising as she glanced over at you, and it would hurt you even more to see that she was also trying not to cry alongside you, only making you feel worse for not telling her earlier that you thought it would be best if you both stayed here, instead, just so you didn’t have to see her get killed trying to fight for your life as well as Akaya’s, and her own, “I’m so sorry, Ember, I-”

“Hey,” she cooed gently whilst she carefully made to wrap her arms around you, before you broke down, and melted into her embrace whilst you cried and sobbed quietly into the crook of her neck; you’d never meant to hurt her the way you could tell you had a brief moment ago by lying the way you had, “it’s okay, Y/n; you don’t have to apologise, okay? I get it, I really do-”

“I just-.. w-wanted to keep you here, b-because I’m scared, okay? I - I can’t lose you; I can’t do this without you, I love-..” You hastily caught yourself before you could finish the sentence, whilst she fell quiet alongside you, her eyes glinting a little whilst she held you at arm’s length - neither of you had ever really dropped directly the love bomb yet, so of course it had to be you who messed up the way you thought you just had, worried about what it might do to your and her relationship; whether it would upset or overwhelm Embry to the point that she no longer wanted to be with you, but how could she ever think that way about you, or react like that when she’d been longing to share such words with you, too, recently?

You then appeared ashamed of yourself as you bowed your head, terrified of making eye contact with her again for fear of the doubt you assumed you’d see within her stunning icy blue orbs in response to your confession a brief moment ago, when really - unbeknownst to you - her eyes were filled instead with the love she held for you, and had always held for you ever since she and the others had first found you, bleeding out and shaking within an abandoned shack not too far away from here, the night you’d run away from your father and his abusive tendencies, if only you’d look up at her and see that she’d always feel the same way for you the way she knew she would, no matter what the future held for you both.

“I love you, too,” she returned gently, and you would appear taken aback, before glancing up at her whilst your eyes began to glint, and heart began to race blissfully alongside her own again; you didn’t think she’d ever feel the same way for a supposed nobody like you, the way she did, and always had, but you were too elated to pay attention to how your heart had sunk at the reminder of who you were, compared to her, before you leaned forward to timidly connect your lips to her own, and everything began to feel bright again around you both, as if the dangers around as well as inside the base were no longer there, as long as you both were holding each other close the way you were, now, focused on only each other again as if you were the last two people standing on earth, somehow, until Akaya whined again, and you were reminded of the situation, begrudgingly pulling away to look over at your and Embry’s companion.

“Shit,” you whispered, “w-what about Akaya?”

Embry would then wince, remembering you and her had practically been kicked out by the higher ranks of the group, whilst Akaya was still struggling to find it within her to get up, and continue alongside you both, not ready yet to go on moving after she’d fallen over a brief moment ago, until her companion got an idea, and smiled softly over at you.

“I guess we’ll just have to carry her, right?” She stated, and you would wince, wondering why you’d not thought of that before - she wasn’t too big, certainly making it easier for Embry to pick her up carefully off of the ground, before she and you made to hastily return to your and her quarters, determined somehow to find a way through this, with - or without - the Survivors’ help.

🜚

Eventually, Embry came to the decision of trying to talk to the other higher ranks within the group; she knew you were worried about her, and could tell that it hurt you to think that you could lose her if ever you both did take to running away, and it pained her to see you so panic as well as grief-stricken, to the point that she couldn’t allow you to go on worrying like that, if she could help it. Once she’d finished talking to them, she lingered in the doorway of her room, timidly watching you as you and Akaya were snuggled up together on her bed, prompting her to smile softly; she liked to see that you and her were getting along better than you had, before, the day she’d brought you into the base, wounded by the Skin-eater that had managed to attack you on your way out of the laboratory your father had been running ever since you were born, or maybe even before your birth - you couldn’t be sure; you only remembered it being active since then, only to create such a hostile atmosphere around you, Embry, and the others with the beginning of the Apocalypse.

“It’s done,” she mustered up in a voice barely audible, surprising you as you glanced over at her, your eyes widening as well as glinting as soon as your gaze fell upon her perfect frame, prompting blood to rush up to her cheeks as she cleared her throat, before taking a small step into the room, allowing the door to slide shut behind her, “they-.. they’re letting us stay, Y/n, l-like-.. like I asked them to.”

“They are?” You replied, genuinely surprised as you used your elbow to prop yourself up a little, allowing you to get a better view of your partner, a thought that unsurprisingly flustered you as you winced, and managed a timid smile back at her whilst you fondled Akaya’s ears using your left hand.

“On one condition,” she continued, and your heart seemed to sink, whilst your eyes darkened - this couldn’t be good, could it? “We don’t fuck anything up, this time,” she repeated, before rolling her eyes, “I didn’t even do anything wrong, and neither did you - they’re such-”

“Ember,” you warned gently, afraid of someone overhearing, and somehow taking her away from you as a result of doing so, and she would falter, a pained expression on her face, before she nodded gravely, and averted her gaze; she knew she should probably try better to watch her tongue, especially when you were both within the base, and could easily be caught by any of the Commanders doing something they considered to be wrong, like slagging them off, talking back, or being sarcastic, though it shouldn’t matter a great deal as sticking together should, especially during times like these where death could always possibly be imminent at the hands of the Skin-eaters outside, or even - not impossibly - rival and out of control groups on the outside who could also take any of your lives in a heartbeat. You then sighed, feeling bad for stopping her, though you knew it was for good reason as you timidly got up off of the bed to wrap your arms affectionately around her waist. “You’re right,” you stated, not wanting her to think that you thought otherwise when that was anything, but true, “Ember, they - they’re exactly what you and me think they are, but-.. there’s nothing we can do about them; we can’t call the police on them for misconduct; we can’t sue them - there’s nothing we can do. We just have to-..”

“Let them treat us like shit?” She guessed, and you would wince, before she scoffed, and escaped your embrace carefully to pour herself an alcoholic beverage, needing it more than anything right now. Well - the thought of your lips against her’s was appetising, too, but she didn’t want to do anything that might make you uncomfortable, especially if it’s a sudden movement like it would be, considering it would be unexpected - probably - to you, during a moment like this.

“I-.. I know how that sounds, Ember, but-.. just-.. hear me out, okay-”

“It’s not fair, Y/n,” she interjected gently, and you would nod gravely whilst she leaned against the alcohol cabinet, her glass in her right hand whilst her gun was still in her left - sometimes she felt uneasy when she didn’t have it with her, especially after Pedro had raped you in what she had thought was your and her safe space away from the monsters outside, only to become another risk factor in your and her lives. “None of this is fair,” she added dejectedly, and you would nod again, before sighing, and sitting down beside Akaya again; you didn’t know what to say, worried about only making the situation worse - you were terrified of upsetting her, somehow, knowing that you could lose her if you did, and to do so would break you, so what else could you do, but stay quiet the way you were, now, focusing on Akaya whilst you tended to her legs and ears. It soothed you; Akaya was showing signs of getting better, and Embry would appear surprised, as well as relieved, smiling softly over at you again whilst she thoughtfully as well as watched you in a crestfallen manner - maybe, if the Apocalypse hadn’t started - things might have been different, but at the same time she knew that she would have been with Cynthia, and not you, a thought that only dejected her even more somehow, though she knew she had truly loved her late fiancé in a way, but being with you had made her feel different, as if Cynthia was something more like a friend to her, except they would have been deemed something like ‘friends with benefits’, but she didn’t want to think that that meant she hadn’t felt anything like love for Cynthia because she had cared deeply for her more than she ever could anyone else, until she had met you. “Kaya, she-.. she’s really warming up to you,” she continued in a gentler and warmer voice, soothing you as you couldn’t help, but smile subconsciously over at her partner’s four legged companion, “i-it’s funny, because-.. it-.. it makes me think that you’d be a great mom.”

You would falter, appearing surprised by her remark as you glanced up at her, your eyes widening a little, and she then winced, assuming she’d said something wrong as she warily glanced down at the ground, and made to rub her neck with her left hand, until you smiled timidly up at her, and managed to muster up a response to soothe her instantly.

“I - I think you’d be a great mum, too,” you replied truthfully, your voice close to a whisper, and she would appear taken aback by your claim, before glancing up at you again, her eyes glinting whilst blood rushed up to her cheeks - a sight you would always believe to be adorable when she was flustered, the way she was, now, alongside you. “E-Ember, I-”

“Can - Can I kiss you, right now?” She inquired, the question slipping from her lips exasperatedly before she could even stop it, prompting you to raise your eyebrows whilst you couldn’t help, but smirk faintly up at her, a mischievous glint forming in your eyes; you’d never seen her like this before, but you liked it nonetheless - everything about her would always be perfect to you, no matter what. “O-Or, maybe, would - would you wanna grab lunch with me in the cafeteria? They’re probably serving, now-.. the food’s not great, n-not that you don’t already know that-”

“Baby-”

“O-Or we could watch a movie together on that screen thing they have downstairs, if you don’t fancy it, but-.. you know what - screw it,” you couldn’t help, but giggle in response to her flustered ramblings, finding it adorable that she was so shy, but excited right now by your presence, as nobody had ever seemed to feel such a way for you, and had never treated you as good as she always had, “let’s go on a date, somewhere; there’s a spare room here somewhere, I know there is, and I could set it up for us like we’re actually in a restaurant, or something; nobody’ll ever catch us there, I promise, I just-..” She then noticed the thoughtful expression on your face; the small tears that were lingering in the corners of your eyes - it was overwhelming, the feeling that someone cared about you the way that she did, when you felt as if you could never make her as happy as she’d made you ever since she’d first found you on the run from your father as well as the Skin-eaters. “You’re crying,” she mused dejectedly, a pained expression on her face whilst you winced, and hastily made to wipe the tears away before they could leak from your eyes the way they had been fighting to for a little while, now, “baby, what - what’s wrong? Talk to me-”

“It - It’s nothing, I promise,” you cooed whilst she cradled you close to her, her arms wrapped around you in the best way possible whilst you buried your face into the crook of her neck for a moment, trying to recompose yourself whilst you clung to her uniform, and wondered why she was still here with you; why she was taking care of you the way she was, as if you were, and forever would be, everything to her, no matter what, when you believed all you could ever do was burden her, only making your heart ache even more excruciatingly than it was, before, “y-you’re just-.. you’re adorable, you know that, right?”

She would appear taken aback by your comment, evidently not expecting it as she raised her eyebrows, and smirked down at you lovingly, as if you were her entire world, and god did such a look make you smile timidly back up at her despite your previous thoughts; she always knew what to do to make you feel whole again, just by being here with you, and loving you the way she was, and knew she always would, no matter what the future held for you both.

“Not as adorable as you,” she contradicted playfully, but before you could contradict her, she carefully picked you up off of the bed, prompting you to giggle uncontrollably after you’d squeaked into her right shoulder blissfully, clinging to her though you trusted her more than anything not to drop you, “and guess what? You’ll never be able to change my mind, ‘cause I’ll always see you to be as what you truly are - perfect, and that’s all that matters, always, no matter what.”

“Oh, well in that case,” you began timidly whilst you smirked up at her, and affectionately connected your forehead to her own, “shut up and kiss me, already, before I actually decide to try and change your mind.”

“Sure, m’lady,” she remarked whilst she carefully lowered you down upon the bed, flustering you as she timidly laid down beside you, her arms still around your waist to ease you closer to her slowly, but she knew - and didn’t intend - to let herself get too heated with you, knowing that if she tried anything like that she might scare you, especially after Pedro had harassed you the way he did recently, and she knew she’d never be able to forgive herself if she hurt you by losing control of yourself the way he had around you, as she smiled lovingly over at you, and breathlessly connected her forehead to your own, “with pleasure, but first-..” She carefully propped herself up upon her elbow to check on Akaya beside you, appearing to now be sleeping, before she smiled widely over at you, so many ideas flying through her mind to the point that it was overwhelming, until she started with one that was pressing her more than any of the others ever had previously throughout the entirety of the day. “What kinda birthday cake would you want me to make you for our date later?” She inquired, and you would appear taken aback by the question, evidently not expecting it - how did she find out that it was your birthday, today?

🜸

“It is your birthday today, right?” She inquired, her voice barely audible for a moment as you winced, and hastily pulled yourself out of your trance, smiling timidly over at her whilst you nodded hastily, and she would express relief, evidently worried that she had got the date wrong for a moment. 18th of July - a day, each year, that you often spent crying upon your bed, locked within your room, or in the bathroom, was about to be remade by Embry Hawthorn, the only woman you believed you could ever see as being the love of your life, and it still felt as if you didn’t deserve someone as perfect as her. “Good,” she replied exasperatedly, an audible sigh of relief slipping from her soft and perfectly shaped lips, prompting your heart to skip a beat, before you smiled faintly back at her, your eyes glinting a little - how could one person make you feel the way that she did, and always had ever since you’d first met, and fallen hopelessly in love with her? “I - I thought I’d got the date mixed up with something else, for a minute there,” she mused, and you would wince, before hastily shaking your head, and reassuringly holding her left hand within your right one, soothing her instantly as her eyes blissfully locked with your’s for a moment. “Did - Did you seriously forget that it was your birthday?” She asked, a mischievous glint in her stunning icy blue eyes, prompting you to begin standing a little whilst your body seemed to heat up; you’d never found yourself in such a flustered state before, especially not over something like this, probably because nobody has ever cared about you the way she did, and knew she always would, no matter what.

“N-No, of course not, I - I just-..” You then faltered, a pained expression on your face, prompting Embry’s smile to fade alongside your own; she hated seeing you like this, and she wondered what it must be that seemed to be plaguing your mind the way it was, as you’d not told her yet about how poorly your father had treated you ever since your mother had gone - she had often stopped him, or tried to, protect you from his antics, but her sudden and unexpected demise had allowed him to abuse you just as much as he liked to, in any way that he wished to, and he often spent your birthdays locking you away, and denying you any attention whilst he worked within his lab, creating the original Skin-eaters that were now doubled, and rearing to take over the world the way they were currently trying to outside the base, whilst you and her were together, and briefly denying their existences entirely. “Obviously I remembered, I mean,” you continued weakly, your gaze fixated upon your now trembling fingers, only worrying her even more as she tried to soothe you by gently squeezing your hands, encouraging you to continue without her even knowing that she had, “how could I ever forget my own birthday?”

“Good, so you do remember, but-.. then.. what’s wrong? W-Why are you sad? Don’t you like birthdays?” She asked, and you would hesitate, before shrugging; you’d not exactly had any good memories to connect to your previous birthdays, unbeknownst to her, prompting your heart to sink again - you’d missed out on so much, and it was excruciating - how could something so small and unknown be so painful, as it was now?

You drew in a barely audible shaky breath, before making to try and continue; to try and muster up some response to her, before you could lose her somehow; you feared she might think you strange if you didn’t respond soon, and explain why you’d had such a reaction to her question, not that she’d ever truly feel that way about you - how could she?

“I - I don’t know,” you managed faintly, and she would frown, feeling bad for asking now as she warily glanced down at her hands holding your’s; your fingers had ceased to shake, unbeknownst to you, ever since she’d held them within her own, prompting her to smile softly - at least there was that, as she revelled in the effect she seemed to have on you sometimes even without you knowing it, “I guess I’ve never really-.. had a true birthday; m-my mum never really-.. she was scared of what my dad might do, if she ever brought it up somehow, a-and he never really gave a shit, so-..” You then winced, warily glancing up at her, before you hastily stammered out a quiet ‘sorry’; you’d never intended to reveal as much as you had, worried about how it might make her feel if you did, as a pained expression crossed over Embry’s face - it all made sense, now, why you seemed to tense up whenever she asked you about your life before the Apocalypse had begun, as well as whenever she asked you or reflected upon stuff like Christmas and birthdays, like she had a brief moment ago, before you’d revealed as much to her regarding your father’s ability within your family’s household, before you had run away from him, and the monsters he was creating unbeknownst to the rest of the world outside of his laboratory.

Before you’d apologised for your revelation, Embry had found herself scowling subconsciously down at the duvet you and her were perched upon, whilst her blood began to boil - your father had no right to treat you the way he had, and that hurt as well as infuriated her more than anything ever had before, until she faltered upon hearing the most broken ‘sorry’ she’d ever heard before, prompting her heart to skip a beat, before she hastily shook her head, and held you at arm’s length confidently whilst small tears began to form within her stunning icy blue eyes.

“No,” she whined, a pained expression on her face whilst she affectionately connected her forehead to your own in the best way possible, “stop apologising for things that aren’t your fault, Y/n, it’s - it’s not-..” A strained sob then managed to escape her lips, surprising you as well as making your heart sink as you wrapped your arms around her tightly, unable to stop your tears as they began to stream down your own cheeks alongside her own; you couldn’t bear to hurt her the way you could see that you just had, telling her about what your father had been like toward you as well as your mother, before she had passed away, and you had managed to flee him before the apocalypse had officially managed to begin after the Skin-eaters had also managed to escape his lab, after brutally killing him, before they began their doubling process to ensure wider amounts of monsters being spread across the country, soon to reach wider parts of the world if the Survivors somehow didn’t manage to stop them before they could do so.

“Ember,” you cooed gently, your voice briefly trembling, but she would shake her head whilst she relocated her right hand delicately to your left cheek, prompting you to fall quiet instantly whilst your gaze locked with her own again blissfully, to the point that you found you could no longer focus on the pounding of your heart, just her, and how she was holding you right now whilst you held her back, and had just confessed partly to your father’s abusive tendencies, something you had never intended to share with anyone before the way you just had so indirectly and openly with her, if only she didn’t make it feel so easy to do so.

“I - I love you so much,” she expressed shakily, “you know that, right?”

“I - It’s okay, Embry, I swear-”

“No, it - it’s not,” she contradicted weakly, wishing you’d stop trying to act as if you were okay when she could tell exactly when you were anything, but - she knew you too well, even though you both hadn’t been together as long as she had been with Cynthia, yet, not that you thought she’d ever want you for as long as she’d had her late fiancé, prompting your heart to sink and ache all over again despite her previous words, and oftentimes insisting otherwise; that she’d always want you, no matter what the future held in store for you both after today, “Y/n, I-.. I’m so sorry-.. I should never have assumed anything like that, I just-..”

“Ember, please,” you pleaded feebly, “I-.. you don’t need to-”

“I will never let anyone ever hurt you again,” she interjected firmly, determined to protect you no matter what the cost, and she meant it more than she’d ever meant anything else before; she wouldn’t lose you, like she’d lost Cynthia, not this time, “now - what would you like me to make you for later?”

🜚

Whilst Embry was in the process of baking you a cake without the other’s knowing, you were warily looking around, evidently worried about being caught by the others again whenever you heard a sound unordinary, like someone or something was moving above the area you and her were currently in, as if the Skin-eaters outside were climbing all over the base, whilst the usual footfalls of other soldiers within the group sounded out distantly in the connected hallways; you just hoped they wouldn’t kick you both out again for using the utilities as well as some of the supplies without their permission.

Embry, on the other hand, couldn’t care less; she was sick of their rules, and formal surroundings; the atmosphere was more oppressive than anything she’d ever experienced before, though she guessed some of it was obviously necessary during an Apocalypse like this one. She just wanted to do all she could to make you happy, and a soft smile couldn’t help, but play on her lips whilst she carefully slid the baking tray into the oven (thank god there was still some power to keep it working via the backup generator the base seemed to have), before making to prepare a couple of plates for when it was finally ready, as well as some not-so-great coffee the group had left behind at the back of the cupboard - that was the best they could do, at least for now, as long as things continued to go their way the way it had been recently with the Skin-eaters as well as rival groups, not that they’d encountered many of those for a little while, now. Some just didn’t have the confidence to become the opponents of the Survivors, big as the group seemed to be, but those who did were persistent, and had already managed to kill or kidnap some of their soldiers - the thought of such a thing happening to either you or Embry made you shudder, and wince a little whilst you subconsciously glanced over at her to make sure that she was okay.

She was humming, now, prompting your eyes to widen a little whilst your eyebrows raised slightly - how could she be so calm, the way that she was, now? She could never cease to amaze you as you smiled timidly in her direction, finding yourself subconsciously admiring her for a moment whilst blood began to rush up to your cheeks all over again - what had you done to deserve someone as perfect as her? You tried not to sigh wonderingly, before forcing yourself out of the brief trance you had found yourself in to quietly get up out of your seat, finding yourself longing to embrace her again, though you were worried about upsetting her or scaring her somehow by doing so as your hands even began to shake a little.

“E-Ember,” you managed in a barely audible voice, surprising her as she hastily turned to face you, her heart skipping a beat whilst she did - for a moment she’d found herself panic-stricken, wondering why you sounded so scared, until she expressed relief upon noticing that you were okay, and that she and you were still alone in the room, and hadn’t been caught at all yet, though the thought of being kicked out didn’t scare her or perturb her the way it seemed to you, due to you believing that you could lose her if you and her were ever to run away together, away from the only group who could possibly protect the both of you from being mauled and taken over by the Skin-eaters outside.

“You okay?” She inquired, and you would wince, before timidly fidgeting with your fingers whilst you averted your gaze down to the ground, stammering more than you hoped you would, before, only making you feel weaker than you’d ever been before as you silently cursed yourself, and wondered why you were the way that you were, believing yourself to be a ‘freak’ again even after all that Embry had told you earlier, as well as before you’d both begun secretly dating without the others knowing that you were. “Hey, what - what’s wrong?” She asked, before carefully holding you close to her, soothing you instantly whilst you melted into her embrace, before burying your face into the crook of her neck blissfully; you just wished you could be stronger for her, whilst she - unbeknownst to you - saw you to be nothing less than perfect, and knew she always would; she loved everything about you, and that was something she was certain would never change, no matter what the future held for you both without you knowing what it was, or if you’d even be out of this Apocalypse by then.

“It - It’s nothing,” you managed timidly, before smiling faintly up at her whilst she held you at arm’s length, her stunning icy blue eyes never leaving your’s, “I just-.. I wanted-.. don’t worry about it, I - I feel much better, now, h-holding you.”

She couldn’t help, but smile lovingly over at you whilst she lifted her right hand up to the back of your head, allowing her to blissfully entangle her fingers within your hair whilst you both focused on nothing, but each other, revelling in how your foreheads were affectionately connected the way that they were, now, whilst the tip of your nose was barely brushing against her own - everything would have been perfect, if it weren’t for the Skin-eaters outside.

“I love you, you know that, right?” She cooed gently, and you would appear taken aback by her words, before nodding timidly whilst you grew to be even more flustered than you were before, somehow, just because of a few measly words like the ones she’d just shared with you - how was it that such a thing was even possible?

“I - I know,” you mustered faintly, your voice briefly trembling whilst your heart pounded overwhelmingly against your ribcage, and you were sure you were blushing quite prominently, now - great; you still thought yourself to be embarrassing, especially whilst you must be looking like a tomato from Italy (the especially red ones).

“Good, so you also know that you can tell me anything, too, don’t you?” She pried, and you realised you hadn’t been blinking, at all, immersed by her eyes, and the different specks and shades of blue within them, leaving you wondering what it would be like to swim within them if the ocean were the same colour as her eyes were, prompting your heart to skip a beat to the point that you found yourself wincing, and wondering if you were about to have a heart attack, right here, still in her arms the way you found yourself longing to be every minute of every day, and - to be honest - death didn’t seem as scary as it often seemed to be, as long as you were with her, and could admire her like you were, now, but of course the reminded of how - if you were dying - you’d never be able to see her again, made you hate death even more all over again.

“Y-Yeah,” you answered quietly, your voice faltering whilst you did, before you winced again, and cursed yourself once more for being so weak around her the way that you were, and had been ever since you’d first met her, somehow, before you both had even begun to realise and acknowledge your feelings for one another the way you had not too long ago, now. “O-Of course I do,” you added hastily, “why - why wouldn’t I? E-Ember, you-.. you’re my rock, my - my-.. safe space; you’re everything to me, and you always will be, I promise - I-.. I love you.”

“I’m glad,” she replied timidly whilst her eyes began to glint alongside your own, “b-because - you are everything to me, too - I love you so much.”

You then warily glanced down at her lips, finding yourself longing to feel them against your’s again, but you didn’t want to do anything without making sure that she was okay with you doing it, but you found you couldn’t muster up the question you longed to ask her during this moment in time, the words stuck in your throat. Embry would frown when she noticed the pained expression on your face; the way your eyes had darkened again, before she timidly relocated her right hand to your left cheek delicately, soothing you instantly as your heart skipped a beat again, before you hastily glanced up at her, your eyes locking with her’s again instantly.

“E-Ember, I-..” You whined, and she would nod slowly to show that she understood what seemed to be plaguing your mind, not wanting you to think otherwise, or to have to suffer the way that she could see that you currently were, small tears slowly trailing down your soft cheeks, only to be gently brushed away by the thumb of her right hand in the best way possible.

“Kiss me,” she cooed gently, and you would falter, your heart racing, but it didn’t take you long to recompose yourself, and she certainly didn’t have to ask you twice as you leaned forward to delicately connect your lips to her soft ones, positively melting what was left of your heart whilst you began to feel warm, fuzzy, and light all at the same time, your skin tingling all over. It didn’t take you long to carefully ease her back against the counter, questions flooding your mind the entire time as if you were terrified of what she might think of you if you did something too quickly; deepened the kiss too quickly, something you were trying hard not to do as your lips slowly and carefully clashed with her own, whilst Embry was also finding herself trying hard not to give into her own urges, her grip on your own green vest tightening in an attempt to try and keep herself focused for you so you could progress things all at your own pace, as she didn’t want to scare or hurt you like Pedro had not too long ago, now. However, as soon as the kiss began to deepen even more, she found herself struggling to fight back her heightened feelings, the adrenaline soon beginning to become too much for the both of you as she hastily pulled out of the kiss, and buried her face into the crook of your neck, breathing heavily alongside you whilst you both tried to recompose yourselves for one another, her arms around your waist still, and your own around her neck. “Shit,” she whispered shakily, “Y-Y/n, I - I’m so sorry, I-..”

Your blood ran cold as you wondered why she was apologising - had you hurt her? Your eyes widened, and a lump began to form in your throat - if you’d hurt her like Pedro had hurt you, you’d never be able to forgive yourself as you hastily shook your head, before carefully lifting her head up to your own whilst you hugged her tightly, and she would frown when she noticed that your entire body had begun to shake a little.

“No,” you whined feebly, your voice weaker than she’d ever heard it before, “I-.. I’m so sorry, Embry, I - I didn’t mean-.. whatever I did, I didn’t mean it, I swear, I-.. I love you, I-.. please don’t - don’t leave me-”

“Hey,” she cooed gently, whilst she held you at arm’s length, not wanting you to think that she’d ever leave you over something like that, especially when you’d not even done anything wrong, “it - it’s okay; you didn’t do anything wrong, a-and I could never leave you, regardless; I could never hurt you like that - hey, l-look at me.”

You then timidly glanced up at her, your eyes glistening again whilst she delicately caressed your left cheek once more.

“I just-.. don’t wanna hurt you,” you murmured dejectedly, “if - if I did, I’d-.. I’d never be able to forgive myself, I-”

“Y/n, you - you could never hurt me,” she reassured hastily, her voice briefly trembling; she just wished she could kill Pedro somehow for what he had done to you, making you the way that you were now; weakening you even more than your father had managed to all those years ago, before you’d run away from him, and found her in the process of doing so, “I only stopped b-because-.. y’know, I-.. I love you, and-.. and I don’t want to lose control around you; I only want to do things that you’re comfortable doing with me, okay? I guess I just-.. I thought-.. after-.. after Pedro, you - you wouldn’t want to-.. and so soon-.. god, I’m only making this worse, aren’t I? I’m so sorry-”

“N-No, Ember, you’re not making anything worse - I understand,” you reassured her, not wanting her to think that you’d be hurt by her assumption when you knew that it was hard, and that there were extra boundaries now given that Pedro had assaulted you the way he had, after your father - before you’d run away from him - had also abused you, just not in the way that the person who you’d thought was your friend had, recently, “I-.. I get it-.. I just-.. just know that I-.. I love you, and I-.. I’m ready, baby, for - for anything, as long as it’s with you, I promise.”

Embry would appear taken aback by your claim, her eyes glinting, before she held your hands within her own blissfully.

“You’re - You’re sure?” She inquired, wanting to make sure that you truly were ready, before she did anything you weren’t ready to do with her after Pedro had hurt you recently.

“Positive,” you answered timidly, before you warily wrapped your arms around her waist again, easing her closer to you to the point that her hips were against your own, prompting her to shudder, her heart skipping a beat again, before she glanced down at your lips timidly, her breathing pattern growing to be staggered and uneven once more, “b-because-.. I - I know you’d never hurt me, I-.. I feel safe with you, Embry, and I - I always will, no matter what, I promise, I-..”

“I love you so much,” she whispered shakily, before leaning forward to gently connect her lips to your’s, soothing you instantly whilst you melted into the kiss again, and wondered why she was so gentle with you; wondered why she cared about you the way she did, and had ever since she’d first met you, after you’d managed to run away from your father’s abusive tendencies, but before you could even voice such questions, she would rest her hands upon your sides, prompting you to jolt, and squeak unexpectedly as she’d managed to locate one of your ticklish spots. “Aww,” she cooed, whilst you blushed again, evidently flustered by her discovery, “I didn’t know you were ticklish - you’re adorable.”

“Ember,” you whined, your voice close to a whisper, whilst she grinned over at you, evidently amused by your response and reaction to her teasing you, “stop-”

“Never,” she replied confidently, as well as a little playfully, before she lovingly connected her lips to your own again, her forehead affectionately brushing against your own whilst you both clung to one another, and revelled in each other’s presence, “you’re everything to me, Y/n L/n, and if it takes me years to repay you for how happy you’ve made me, then I’ll willingly do everything I can to keep you happy, too, whilst also doing all I can just to see you blushing, somehow, and - oh, speaking of - I think you’ve already begun to blush even more, now, have you?”

“No-!” You contradicted, scoffing, before hastily averting your gaze, though it was evident that you’d already begun to blush quite prominently, just by cooing sweet nothings to you, and kissing you delicately as if you were fragile, and could easily be crushed somehow by a foot, or paw, like a flower could - something she was terrified of happening; she didn’t know what she’d do, without you, if ever the Skin-eaters got to you, the way they easily could if ever you and her decided to venture out of the base together, no matter how determined she was to protect you at all costs, if ever such an occurrence took place like she secretly feared it could, soon.

“Really?” She questioned, and you would hastily nod, as if you thought you’d convinced her, or at least could, that you weren’t blushing, when she’d already caught you doing so unbeknownst to you. “Oh, please - I know you, Y/n,” she stated, and you would wince - she did know you, too well - more than you could ever know yourself, “I just hope I know you enough to make sure you enjoy this cake; it’s great, especially for people who love anything to do with vanilla, and icing.”

🜚

The cake came out perfect; it was perfect - everything about it was, just as you’d thought it would be, but nothing could ever be as perfect as she was, and always would be, to you, ever since you’d first met her, and fallen hopelessly in love with her.

“What do you think?” She inquired, evidently nervous as she timidly leaned forward, awaiting your answer and hopefully approval after you’d spooned up and positively devoured the last small pieces that had remained upon your plate, leaving a few slices still left for later, only for you two, though, Embry specifically instructed, probably because she was still mad at how one of the Commanders had spoken to you both earlier, positively kicking you out only to be denounced by his counter-parts within the base, and group. “D-Do you like it, or - or should I be discarding the recipe for next year?” She pried, and you would appear taken aback, before hastily shaking your head, setting down your spoon, and instead holding her hands blissfully within your own in an attempt to try and provide comfort to her, soothing her instantly as she expressed relief, and couldn’t help, but smile softly over at you whilst blood rushed up to her cheeks, and her gaze locked with your’s again.

“I more than liked it, Ember,” you answered shyly, whilst you timidly brushed your thumbs over her knuckles, before briefly drawing circles upon the back of her hand, wondering how they were so soft and perfect like her lips were, whenever you mustered up the courage to kiss her the way you had earlier, “I loved it - honestly, it had to be the best thing that I’ve ever tasted; I appreciate everything that you do for me, you know that, right? No matter what.”

Embry gave your hands a reassuring squeeze, prompting your heart to skip a beat whilst you couldn’t help, but admire the blue sparks within her stunning orbs again, longing to remain within her eyes forever, somehow, as if her person and soul were the only safe space you could ever cope within; could ever survive in, as long as you both stuck together, no matter what the future might be holding for you, after today.

“I - I’m glad, I just-.. I guess I’m-.. I’m just scared,” she admitted dejectedly, prompting your heart to sink; you didn’t want her to ever feel that way around you, especially when you felt as if it should be you who should be scared of doing something wrong around her, “if I disappoint you somehow, w-who’s to say I won’t lose you?”

“Hey,” you replied firmly; determinedly, surprising her as she appeared taken aback by your demeanour, evidently not expecting it, especially so soon after Pedro had assaulted you - maybe the you she’d first met was finally coming back to her, slowly but surely, with every passing day she spent with you, loving you the way she’d longed to ever since she had first met you out in the forest, bloody and close to death, only to be revived somehow by her own confidence that she could save you, and keep you with her, somehow, and here you both were today, eating a vanilla-flavoured birthday cake whilst Skin-eaters and god knows what other rival groups were roaming around outside, waiting for their next opportunity to strike, and achieve another fresh kill before the other could rot over them. “You could never disappoint me, Ember,” you cooed, “I love you; e-everything about you just - makes me feel-.. complete, somehow, a-and I-.. I could never be driven away from you, so don’t ever think that you could do something to hurt me enough to make me not want you anymore, because there’s no way in hell that I’m ever gonna up and leave you like that - my feelings for you are too strong, and they’re certainly all I have, and want now, no matter what, I promise - d-don’t ever forget that, okay? P-Promise me that you won’t, even, o-or else I’ll-”

“I’ll never forget, I promise,” she cooed gently, soothing you instantly as you expressed relief alongside her, before smiling timidly over at her, and leaning forward a little over your plate, your lips longing to caress her own again, somehow, though you feared how she might react if you tried to kiss her once more for tonight, instead averting your gaze whilst you tried to think of a new topic of conversation, before blurting one out exasperatedly whilst she tilted her head partially in the best way possible, her eyes glinting somehow more than even the shiniest star ever could.

“H-How did you even remember that it was my birthday today, anyway? D-Did I ever just-.. tell you that it was, ‘cause I can’t remember, and it’s starting to scare me - I don’t know why,” you admitted feebly, surprising her as she raised her eyebrows partially, whilst a soft smile began to tug at her lips again, prompting your heart to skip a beat, before it began to race overwhelmingly alongside her own once more, as if it hadn’t been pounding against your ribcage already for a little while, now, ever since Embry had returned to you from her lookout for more possible survivors outside the base, if only you could join her, and make sure that you could never lose her, somehow, the thought of being eager to die for her if such an issue occurred even filling you up to the brim with further hints and spouts of determination as you timidly pushed yourself to continue, your voice briefly trembling as you did, “you - you just-.. know me, m-more than I could ever know myself, a-and-.. I don’t know how, b-but you do - care to tell me your secrets?”

Embry tensed up on the other side of the table, wincing, before she bowed her head - whatever she hadn’t yet told you, was evidently something she’d been hoping not to share, and boy were you eager to hear it, no matter what beautiful secrets her’s truly were, and would turn out to be, as soon as she mustered up enough the courage to share them.

🜸

She remembered the night you were first brought in; how she’d hastily carried you back to the base whilst you bled out within her arms, barely conscious, and crying quietly into her left arm; you couldn’t believe you weren’t dead, but the pain was enough to make you want to be dead, instead of being taken to wherever you were being brought to, of course that was before you first were able to see Embry clearly; before you’d first fallen hopelessly in love with her the way you had, that same night, the way she had with you, too, without realising it, at first, until you’d got better, and were able to spend more time with her outside of the medical quarters they had set up within the base, just a safety precaution, and all that jazz - a lot of people were being wounded out there, and were often in need of some medical attention, at least. The Skin-eaters’ bites were nasty, and so were their claws, especially when they tried to extend them within their prey - some weird thing they do which you hadn’t yet figured out why, yourself - all you knew was that they were your father’s creation, and seemed to double somehow by absorbing the bodies of those they did manage to kill, and extend themselves within, effectively taking over their bodies and therefore the power that used to be within them. It’s a shame for them that their bites couldn’t do that, but definitely some kinda benefit for you as well as the others, if you had any chance of survival at all, in the near future.

“Are you sure you wanna know? S-Some might be a little-.. creepy,” she murmured, her voice trailing off a little, surprising you, before you nodded hastily, squeezed her hands gently, and found your eyes widening - how exciting, your heart was even beginning to race again, “o-okay, well-.. I-.. t-the night you first joined us, I-.. I didn’t know what it was, o-or why I was doing it, but-.. I decided to take over the surveillance duty within the medical quarters that you were in - I guess I just wanted to make sure that you were okay, a-and I guess finding myself staring at you was doing that, right? Again, I don’t know why, but-”

“I’m just that irresistible, right?” You teased, prompting her to falter, evidently flustered by your remark as blood began to rush up to her cheeks, and she found herself stammering for a moment, whilst she briefly disconnected her right hand from your left one to rub at the back of her neck, prompting you to smirk over at her whilst you revelled in the feeling of being able to make her feel the way that you somehow could, though you believed yourself to be nothing, compared to her, and always had, making your heart drop all over again upon being reminded of who you were, compared to her; reminded of your little worth, and how you only felt dirtier after Pedro had violated you the way he had recently, if only she couldn’t notice such things about you more than you’d ever noticed anything about yourself.

“Hey,” she cooed, her heart sinking as soon as she noticed the pained expression on your face, “w-whatever you’re thinking right now, stop it - n-none of - none of what you believe about yourself is true. Y-Y/n, you - you’re perfect, and you always will be, I promise; nothing could ever change the way that I see you, I just wish-.. just wish that I could show you, somehow, h-how-.. how I see you - I love you, Y/n L/n, and I always will, no matter what, okay?”

You would hesitate, before smiling timidly over at her, and returning with a soft ‘okay’, before you shuffled your chair closer to her own, allowing you to rest your head blissfully upon her left shoulder whilst she held your hands within her’s again, wondering what she’d done to deserve someone as caring and perfect as you, whilst she also pondered upon how she could try and show you that you meant the world to her, and always would, no matter what the future held in store for you both.

“So - w-what are your other secrets? I wanna know everything about you, Ember,” you mused a little dreamily, before wincing, and remembering that you, too, held something you couldn’t tell her, yourself, prompting you to feel even worse for what you were doing, right now; she’d hate you, if you told her that it was your father who had created the Skin-eaters in the first place; if you told her that you felt as if you couldn’t stop him - that you were terrified, and had to get away, instead of trying to shut down his operation somehow, and that was a risk you couldn’t take.

“Well-.. I don’t have many others; you pretty much already know everything about me,” she answered, and you wondered why her cheeks seemed to grow even redder as she claimed as much, “t-they mostly - revolve around you.”

“Is that so?” You replied a little more brightly, whilst smiling softly up at her again, and finding yourself admiring her facial features whilst you both drew small designs on each other’s hands, again recalling in the perfect moment, away from the chaos most likely taking place outside of the base, as well as beyond this room you both were currently hiding in. “And what are they, exactly?” You pried, only flustering her even more as she tried to recompose herself, looking as if she were searching for the right words she could use to describe all the times she’d caught herself staring at you, even when you were across a room, and not beside her like you usually were, especially now, as well as all the times she’d caught herself thinking about you, and about if you maybe were thinking about her, too, like you often were, even when she wasn’t around, and was outside of the base looking for more survivors to join the crew. She’d even stopped dreaming of Cynthia after a little while, her head instead being preoccupied by you; your voice, your face, everything about you, and it had been more overwhelming than anything else ever had been, before, but she loved every second of every thought she had of you, and hoped that that would never change, no matter what the future held in store for you both.

“J-Just that-.. I-.. er-.. whenever-.. whenever you were around, and I wasn’t out with the others,” she began timidly, staring down at her fingers intertwined within your own, “I-.. o-often-.. shit, I didn’t realise this would be so hard, I-”

“It’s okay,” you reassured her gently, your voice soothing her instantly as she found herself subconsciously glancing over at you, her gaze drawn to your own in the best way possible, before she timidly glanced down at your lips, prompting you to raise your eyebrows, before you smirked, and timidly leaned closer, flustering her even more somehow as your lips were now inches away from her own, close enough for her to just lean forward, and-…

No, she wouldn’t do it - not without you asking her to. She drew in a barely audible shaky breath, before smiling weakly back at you, and lifting her right hand up to your left cheek.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” she managed, her voice close to a whisper, prompting you to falter yourself whilst your eyes locked with her’s again, and heart began to pound overwhelmingly against your ribcage, “c-couldn’t stop-.. just-.. wanting you, a-and wishing you were there with me, even when you were in the same room that I was. Y-Y/n, I-.. I love you, a-and I’m so glad that I know that, now, ‘c-cause if I-.. if I was still hung up on Cynthia I-”

“I love you so much,” you blurted out a little shakily, before you leaned forward to delicately connect your lips to her own, prompting her instantly to melt into the kiss whilst she intertwined the fingers of her right hand within your hair blissfully, prompting you to shudder a little upon feeling them whilst you wrapped your arms around her waist subconsciously for stability, evidently worried that you could somehow fall off of your chair if your body gave up on working properly, bringing her down with you, whilst you also feared that maybe she’d disappear, if you let go of her now, and the possibility of such a thing happening terrified you more than anything else ever had before.

Akaya then whined, wanting attention from her companions, prompting you both to hesitantly break the kiss, before you giggled feebly together, small tears clouding one another’s vision whilst Embry encouraged Akaya over to the table.

“C’mere, girl; we can’t have you being lonely over there, can we?” She cooed, and Akaya wouldn’t hesitate to bark, before she brightly trotted over to you both, and laid down at your and her feet whilst you both fussed over her ears, neck, and back, not once finding yourselves recovering from the exasperated fits of giggling you’d both been experiencing ever since the kiss had occurred, and sadly ended. However, once you had, it was when the knuckles of her left hand had brushed against the fingers of your right one, prompting you to falter, before you glanced up at her, and wondered why it felt like a wave of electricity had been sent through your arm just through such a small touch as the one you’d both just shared, a brief moment ago, now. “Shit, sorry, I - I didn’t mean-..” She then winced, the dazed expression on your face worrying her, for a moment; she’d feared that maybe - by accidentally having her hand brush against your’s - she’d scared you, or made you feel uncomfortable, before hastily bowing her head, until you shook your own, and carefully held her hand within your’s before she could withdraw it, soothing her instantly again whilst she shyly glanced up at you once more, her heart racing again alongside your own as if something were chasing it, but could never catch it during this moment in time, as you made her whole being soar with anticipation, and hope - maybe, as long as you both were together, nothing would ever be able to get to you, and you’d be able to take down the Skin-eaters, flee the country, and therefore be able to spend the rest of your lives as well as - hopefully - the rest of eternity, together, as if the Apocalypse had never taken place the way it had, and still was, but that didn’t matter right now, as long as you all were together, and they were where they couldn’t currently get to you - isn’t that beautiful? How you’d both forgotten all about them, again, just because of your souls being intertwined the way that they currently were? If only love by itself could truly destroy all threats around you both, but it seemed a lot more needed to be done, still, if the Survivors wanted to get the drop on the Skin-eaters as well as rival groups completely, just to try and take the world back from them before it could become too late to do so, and time was running out faster than any of them, including you and Embry, could ever expect, or want it to, ‘cause some of the others did seem to in hopes of just wanting to die to escape the situation entirely - the medical quarters saw a few patients who came in just to be found in the morning with new open wounds made by the small pen knives left on each of their bedsides as a safety precaution; you’d never understood that rule, and neither did those who were on surveillance duty who had to watch it all take place.

You remembered Embry telling you one time about how someone had - in the middle of the night, during her shift - taken up the pen-knife, before they made to dash it into their neck, prompting her to gasp, a strained sob escaping her lips - there was nothing she could have done; the Commanders certainly wouldn’t allow her to help the poor guy, but she couldn’t let it happen again, and that was why you were still alive, today. You’d tried, yourself, to take your life within the medical quarters, when Embry stopped you, and confiscated the pen-knife entirely, though you couldn’t imagine why she’d bother - you saw yourself as being a burden on her as well as the others, so why should she want to keep you alive? You never thought she’d ever end up feeling the same way for you, after you’d begun to fall for her yourself.

“It - It’s fine, I promise,” you reassured her gently, and she would express relief instantly, her eyes glinting as they locked with your’s in the best way possible, Akaya peacefully laying her head upon her paws whilst you both smiled lovingly over at one another for a moment, until you managed to muster up the courage to continue, though your heart pounding was making it hard for you to do so without stammering a little like she had been earlier, “don’t ever worry about hurting me, o-okay? ‘Cause you never will - I trust you, Ember, m-more than I could ever trust myself, or anyone else, and that’ll never change, I promise, n-no matter what.”

“Good,” she replied timidly, and you would nod slowly in agreement with her as well as to further clarify that that was the way you truly felt, and knew you always would, no matter what might happen after today, “I - I’m glad, I-.. ‘c-cause I trust you, too, a-and I always will, I promise - it’ll always be us against the world, right?”

“Always,” you agreed confidently, “n-no matter what, it’ll just be you, me, and Kaya - the others can’t hurt us, not when we’re together, as long as you answer just one more question for me, c-can you?”

“Of course I can,” she answered hastily, without even thinking about it - what kinda question was that, anyway?

“H-How’d you find out about it being my birthday today?” You pried, still nervous; you just couldn’t remember telling her, at all, and you feared that maybe - if she found out anything else about you, she’d discover the whole truth that you were terrified of her revealing, without finding herself feeling betrayed by you, and not wanting you anymore, and that was something you just knew you wouldn’t be able to take, without finding yourself ending up in a pool of your own blood again.

🜸

Embry would appear taken aback by the question - of course she was, but it wasn’t because its repetition had surprised her; it was more the tone - the hint of desperation, anxiety, and urgency that she heard within your voice as it was delivered again; why did you sound so scared, when she thought you had remembered that you’d told her yourself about it being your birthday? What had you to hide? She hoped that you weren’t keeping anything from her; you’d promised yourself never to do anything like that to her whilst she, too, had made the same promise to you, and though there was a lingering possibility nagging and burdening her brain, she tried to push it aside; all her suspicions, as if they were never there, before she returned her attention to you, and the question at hand that had just been posed upon her again.

“You’re still on that?” She mused, and you would wince, before nodding timidly, and rubbing at the back of your neck with your right hand, her eyes never leaving your’s as if your and her orbs were made to be stuck on one another, no matter what. Despite the moment, your gazes just couldn’t break away from each other, and you couldn’t help, but find yourself wishing she’d stop caring about you - why would she even want to? If the truth ever came out in the end that it was your father who’d created the monsters outside, what would they think of you? What would Embry think of you? She’d certainly be hurt by the revelation, and that just made your heart ache excruciatingly within your chest - you couldn’t let such a secret hurt her the way it would, especially when you knew you’d lose her, too, if ever she caught wind of it. However, you’d gladly take on any pain just to save her it if it meant that the secret would have to come out in the end, somehow, though you were sure (and silently hoping against hope) that your father and his worker goons were dead, now, as long as nobody found out about your association with them. “Why?” She inquired, whilst a soft smile couldn’t help, but tug on her lips; she couldn’t stop it - you’d always make her smile, no matter what, and that was all she was certain of, now, aside from the fact that she knew she’d always love you, even after the apocalypse hopefully came to an end at some point in the future, with whatever outcome it left behind for who still remained, of which she believed (on good days) that you both would be two of them, alongside Akaya.

“I - I don’t know, I just-.. y’know, I - I can’t remember, a-and I guess I just-.. want to make sure that - when I told you - I wasn’t doing anything embarrassing, o-or whatever,” you rambled, whilst blood began to rush to your cheeks, prompting her to raise her eyebrows, before she tilted her head partially, her smile turning into a smirk, now, whilst her eyes glinted a little mischievously as if she was delighting in flustering you all over again, “was I? I’m guessing I was drunk, o-or something - else I - I would have remembered when I told you, right?”

“Has anyone ever told you-” As she delicately traced the thumb of her right hand over the light and small freckle you’d had since you were quite young, right beside your left eyebrow, “t-that you’re the most - most beautiful and adorable woman to ever exist on what’s left of the earth, now?”

You would falter, beginning to feel warm and fuzzy again whilst your cheeks definitely grew redder, exactly what she’d been willing them to do as she grinned sheepishly over at you, and carefully tucked a stray few hairs behind your ear after they’d managed to block your left eye; it was annoyingly getting longer quite quickly, now, and you didn’t exactly feel confident yourself in trimming it back down to the way it was, before, especially what with everything going on, recently, and there no longer being any other safe spaces left beyond the base.

All the remaining safe houses and military bases had seemed to be taken down, meaning this was the last one, somehow - lord knows how it was still standing, against the Skin-eaters and rival groups out there.

“Ember,” you whined, your voice close to a whisper, prompting her heart to skip a beat; she loved the way you said her name, as well as her nickname ‘Ember’, and wondered subconsciously how she’d never felt this way for Cynthia, before she’d lost her, only making her feel guilty again as she timidly withdrew her hand, before smiling weakly over at you, and wincing; she had to stop somehow getting herself carried away by her intrusive thoughts regarding everything about you that was, and always would be stunning, to her, trying to remind herself of the question she still had yet to answer for you.

“R-Right, sorry,” she mustered up a little exasperatedly, before smiling faintly over at you again, and stretching within her chair, “you were drunk, at the time, but don’t worry - you weren’t doing anything embarrassing; we were just talking about stuff, a-and - and I remembered you told me that it was your birthday on the twenty-fifth of July, s-so I-.. y’know, I had to do something for you; I couldn’t let you go without having a little celebration of some kind, right? I love you, Y/n, and the Skin-eaters will never be able to stop me from doing all I can to make you happy, I promise.”

You didn’t know what to say, your voice failing you for a moment whilst small tears began to cloud your vision; you’d never had someone care about you the way that she did, and it was surprisingly painful. How could you mean so much to her? A supposed nobody like you? You drew in a barely audible shaky breath, before hastily bowing your head to try and hide that you were on the verge of breaking down all over again; you’d never get used to the way she made you feel, that was for sure.

“Embry,” you murmured dejectedly, your voice briefly trembling whilst she wondered why you were hiding your face from her the way that you currently were, “I-.. I have-.. I need to tell you something.”

🜚

You were sat upon the edge of her bed, anxiously fidgeting with your fingers whilst Embry was brushing her teeth within the bathroom. You couldn’t believe you’d almost told her about your association with the beginning of the Apocalypse, drawing in a barely audible shaky breath whilst Akaya eyed you suspiciously, tilting her head in your direction, as if she knew that you were hiding something, and was judging you for what you were doing to Embry. However, you didn’t exactly feel proud for diverting yourself; for instead telling her that you’d rather stay within her quarters tonight with her, and - although it was an ideal moment you’d always pictured within your head - not telling her about your father’s creation of the Skin-eaters currently taking over the world outside of the base, so you tried to tell yourself that you wouldn’t let it remain a secret much longer; you wouldn’t let anything happen, until she knew about all he had done; until she knew he was responsible for the world you both now knew, and could decide if she still wanted you, or not.

The possibility of her rejecting you prompted your heart to sink all over again - what if you lost her, after today? What if she hated you after you planned on telling her about your father’s creation of the Skin-eaters? What if-

“Are you okay? Y-You’re real quiet,” Embry spoke up, her voice thoughtful, and more gentle than you’d ever heard it before, prompting your heart to skip a beat, before you hastily glanced up at her, and managed a faint smile in her direction; you were terrified - she was everything to you, and she always would be, so how would you be supposed to fare without her, if you did lose her? “Hey,” she cooed, frowning when she noticed the pained expression on your face; you’d not felt it, until now - your heart had been overwhelming you enough for you to lose focus altogether, until she spoke up again, and sat down beside you, “what’s wrong?”

“It - It’s nothing, I just-..” You hastily shook your head, before bowing it whilst she timidly intertwined the fingers of her right hand with the shaky fingers of your left one, only making you feel even worse than you did, before, as you wondered what it would feel like to never be able to feel her hands holding your own. “I’m fine, Ember, don’t - don’t worry, about me,” you murmured, whilst small tears began to cloud your vision, but of course she didn’t believe you; she knew you too well to let your answer go unnoticed.

“No, Y/n, don’t give me that,” she interjected gently, a hurt look on her face; she wished you’d just tell her the truth; tell her that maybe you weren’t ready to do anything more with her, yet, as she feared that progressing with you the relationship too quickly would drive her away from you, and she couldn’t imagine a life without you in it, like that, so she wouldn’t allow it, if you were doubting doing anything more with her the way you’d claimed that you wanted to, earlier, whilst you both were hiding out within one of the only working kitchens in the base that seemed to have been forgotten about a lot of the time, “look, if - if you’re not ready to do this-”

“W-What? No!” You interrupted exasperatedly; you didn’t want her to think that you didn’t want to progress with her, because you did, more than anything, if only you could find it within you to tell her the truth about your father, and the Apocalypse going on around you both. “E-Ember, I - I want to do this, I-..” You then drew in another deep breath, before turning your body more to face her own, your eyes locking with her’s in the best way possible - thank god you’d managed to blink away most of your tears, though she did still notice that you were trying not to cry, making her heart ache more than it ever had before. “I love you,” you expressed feebly, your voice close to a whisper, and she would hesitate, the air seeming to grow thicker around you both whilst you found yourselves staring longingly over at one another for a moment, before she timidly leaned closer to you to delicately connect her lips to your’s, prompting you to falter as you instantly melted into the kiss, before you wrapped your arms around her waist, and subconsciously began to deepen it.

You wouldn’t have remembered your plan, if it weren’t for Akaya, who growled quietly whilst you both were kissing a little more passionately, prompting you to wince, before you hastily pulled away, and bowed your head again, worrying Embry who looked on at you with a pained as well as concerned expression on her face, wondering why you’d stopped so suddenly the way that you had, and if it was because of her; something she’d done, or said, a brief moment ago, before you both had begun to kiss the way you had not too long ago, now.

“Y/n? W-What’s-” She managed a little breathlessly, her voice barely audible whilst she eased you a little closer to her, cradling your body in an attempt to provide comfort to you as you clung to her, a guilty expression on your face.

“I - I think we should..” You then fell quiet again, wincing, before you timidly glanced up at her, and she understood exactly what you wanted her to do, nodding as she smiled lovingly down at you, relieving you in an instant; you couldn’t do this, not until you felt confident enough to tell her nothing, but the truth regarding your father, and the Skin-eaters, otherwise you’d never be able to forgive yourself, when you knew that - if she decided she didn’t want you anymore once she knew about his creating the world that you both were in, now - she’d be able to find someone better than you; someone who could actually make her happy, prompting your heart to sink again.

“Okay,” she replied softly, her voice soothing you as your heart skipped a beat, and you began to feel warm and fuzzy again, “that’s okay - we can wait; I won’t force you, you know that, right? I only want to progress when you’re ready to progress with me, okay?”

You would hesitate, before nodding whilst you smiled sadly up at her; you couldn’t stop thinking about how there was a possibility you’d never be able to spend the rest of eternity with her, no matter how much you longed to, and have dreamed of doing so, even before you’d both decided to get together in secret, behind the backs of the other Survivors you were currently working with to try and restore the world that you used to know by fighting against the Skin-eaters beyond the walls of the base.

“Okay,” you whispered, and she would lean down to gently press a kiss to your forehead, before you buried your face into the crook of her neck, her right hand blissfully resting upon the back of your head, allowing her to entangle her fingers within your hair in the best way possible, “m-maybe we - we could-.. try tomorrow?”

Embry would falter, a pained expression on her face, before she held you at arms length whilst you looked up at her warily, wondering why she seemed sad all of a sudden, as if she weren’t going to be around to be with you tomorrow for a reason currently unbeknownst to you, until she mustered up the answer you’d been fearing as soon as you noticed her stunning icy blue eyes darkening in response to your previous question.

“I - I can’t, tomorrow,” she answered dejectedly, and you would frown, before nodding gravely, and averting your gaze before she could see that more tears had begun to cloud your vision again; you weren’t sure how much more you could take of being away from her; of hiding your secret from her - it was painful, and you especially hated that - whilst she was often out with some of the others, looking for other survivors who weren’t rivals - you were waiting back at the base, and wondering if she would even end up coming back to you, or if you’d be faced with hearing from one of the Commanders that she had been lost during one of her shifts. “The commanders, they-.. they want me to start again,” she admitted begrudgingly, and you would realise, before nodding gravely again whilst you stared down at your hands, and wondered if things would ever be the same as they used to be, before; if the world would ever go back to normal, allowing you and her to be together freely, without threat of being taken away by the Skin-eaters outside, or rogue groups determined to kill those searching for an escape the way that you and the others were, “I’m so sorry-”

“N-No, Ember, it-.. it’s okay, I promise,” you reassured her gently, not wanting her to feel as if she had to apologise to you, especially not considering the situation, as well as the fact that you felt as if you should be the only one apologising to her, finding yourself struggling to tell her about your father’s association in the creation of the Apocalypse going on around you both, “I-.. I just-.. I love you, Embry, I-.. I can’t lose you, so - a-at least, promise me you’ll come back to me, if I can’t come with you-”

“Hey,” she interjected feebly, her voice cracking a little; it pained her to hear that you still feared that maybe you’d end up losing her, somehow, if she continued doing what she was doing with the others by going outside of the base, something you’d still never been able to do, considering the group didn’t seem to trust you as much as they did their other associates - you guessed your bite had just been a little nastier than the others had been, and the scratches certainly weren’t paid any attention by the Commanders. You’d tried - one time, or two, now - to get them to change their minds; get them to let you go out there with her, obviously without her knowing (she’d probably be against you going out there, herself, if she knew), only to be repeatedly turned down, and told that you couldn’t leave, as if you might burst out into the form of a Skin-eater any second now; they had to be the most stupid people you’d ever met, though you guessed they didn’t know as much as you did about these monsters that were roaming dangerously outside of the base, as well as across the country, now, evidently intending to try and take over the rest of the world as you and Embry grew to knew it, until now. “You’ll never lose me,” she cooed, “I promise; I could never let anything take me away from you, Y/n - it’ll only ever be you who I fight to return to, and I mean that, m-more than I could ever mean anything else. Besides, I have the others with me, don’t I? Erica’d never let anything happen to me, either; she knows what I mean to you, so-”

“Erica’s going with you?” You interrupted without thinking, your eyebrows subconsciously furrowing whilst she appeared taken aback by your interruption, tilting her head partially whilst she wondered why you were so down, all of a sudden, your eyes darkening as if a fire within your soul had just been extinguished as a result of her revelation regarding her shift tomorrow.

“Yeah,” she answered slowly, whilst you appeared thoughtful, and sad, for a reason unbeknownst to her; you just couldn’t help, but think about how close she and Erica seemed to be, even before Embry had first met, and fallen hopelessly in love with you, “why? What’s wrong? D-Did she do something to you-? Y/n-”

“N-No,” you interjected hastily, before wincing, and bowing your head again, “god, no, she - she just-.. I-.. I don’t know-.. I-.. it’s nothing, don’t worry about it, I-.. just wish I could go with you guys, I guess.”

Embry would raise her eyebrows, scoffing, before she held you at arm’s length again whilst you appeared ashamed of yourself, not daring to glance up at her again after you’d let yourself down the way you felt you had by being so weak when it came to you being terrified of losing her, somehow.

“Oh, please,” she remarked, “Y/n, I know you - are you jealous, baby? Of me and Erica?”

You would scoff, before hastily shaking your head, and then bowing it again whilst timidly fidgeting with your hands, your eyes glistening, and heart throbbing overwhelmingly as well as excruciatingly; you’d never get used to her teasing you, just like you’d never get used to being the way that you were, compared to her, only making you feel worse again as you frowned, and tried your best to blink the tears back.

“Jealous?” You uttered, and she would nod, whilst trying hard not to smirk over at you; she loved to see you flustered, whilst at the same time there was a lingering pain being emitted from her heart as a result of knowing that you still feared sometimes that you weren’t enough for her; that someone could take her away from you the way you believed Erica easily could, being supposedly more perfect than you could ever be - something she could never believe, herself, believing you to be the most perfect and caring woman she’d ever met - nothing could ever stop her from loving you the way she always had, and believed she always would, no matter what the future might be holding in store for you both after today. “God, no,” you claimed, “why - why would I be? Ember-”

“Are you sure? ‘Cause I could try and change which group I’m in tomorrow if you want me to-”

“No,” you blurted out exasperatedly, not wanting her to think that she had to do that whilst you timidly held her hands within your’s again delicately, your eyes locking with hers in the process in the best way possible, “d-don’t, I-.. I’d feel better, i-if you-.. if you stayed with Erica; you’re right, she’d-.. she’d take care of you, out there, s-so-..”

You then fell quiet again, your eyes darkening once more whilst you smiled weakly up at her, making her heart ache even more.

“Hey,” she cooed gently whilst she wrapped her arms around you, prompting your heart to skip a beat whilst you melted into her embrace, “you know I love you, don’t you, a-and that I always will, right?”

You would hesitate, trying not to allow a pained expression to cross your face whilst you nodded slowly, feeling emptier than you ever had before; you just hoped that - if you ever were to lose Embry to Erica - she would treat her the way a princess like her should be treated, only making you feel worse again; you just wished you could be enough for her, somehow.

“O-Of course I do, I-.. why wouldn’t I know?” You inquired, and Embry would frown, trying not to allow herself to blurt out her suspicions; she didn’t want to upset you anymore than she could tell she already had indirectly. “H-Hey, can we-..? I’m tired, a-and you probably need some sleep for tomorrow,” you suggested, and Embry would appear surprised, before she winced, and nodded hastily, not wanting to keep you up; your eyes were quite dark, and she did feel kinda tired after all you’d both found yourselves doing today, “I don’t wanna keep you up, e-especially not when your energy’s needed m-more than ever, right now, against the Skin-eaters.”

“Sure,” she replied kindly, before she shuffled down her bed, and lifted the duvet for you, “here - come join me.” You timidly glanced back at her, before you nodded, and tried to swallow back the lump in your throat; you weren’t sure why, but it still made you nervous nonetheless to be in a situation like this, still hiding your secret, and tormented by what Pedro had done to you, and your hesitation would worry Embry as well as dishearten her; she knew it must be hard for you, right now, to try and get used to being so close to her the way you would be, if you were to sleep within the bed, right beside her, but it wasn’t that you were scared of being with her, it was that you were scared of waking up, and finding her gone; scared of disappointing her somehow; scared of losing her somehow the next day. “O-Only if you feel like you can, though, okay? Do you? If - If not, I - I could - I could set up a bed on the floor that I could use, instead, and you can take the bed?”

“No, Ember, I - I can do this,” you reassured her timidly, before you smiled faintly over at her, and made to lay down beside her, and once you were in the bed, your heart seemed to skip a beat again whilst Embry carefully covered you with the duvet, before inching a little closer to you; she hated being away from you, but she made sure not to get too close, wanting to make sure that you felt comfortable, before she got any closer to you the way she longed to be able to. “Besides, I - I can’t let you banish yourself onto the floor, can I? You need sleep more than I do, right now,” you reminded her, and she would wince, before trying to think up an excuse; a reason why you might need more sleep than her, but before she could give one, you appearing a little dejected again overtook her train of thought as a worried look crossed her fade again; she hated seeing you like this, and wished she could do more for you somehow to make you happy, if only she knew a way to do so, especially during times like these.

“You okay?” She inquired, her voice softer than you’d ever heard it before as you timidly glanced over at her, your heart racing uncomfortably whilst you thought back to the night Pedro had raped you, after pinning you down onto his bed whilst you remembered crying for help; crying desperately for someone to find you, and take you away from him before he could go on hurting you, but Embry had been out at the time, only to discover you crying and sobbing uncontrollably within your quarters, and her heart had never hurt so much as it did that day, and remnants of such a pain still lingered excruciatingly within her chest, heightened now that she was reminded of it as you winced, and nodded hastily, trying to hide your pain from her again. “Hey, are you sure you don’t want me to move? ‘C-Cause I can, if you need more space-”

“No,” you whined, your eyes widening a little, “I - I’m okay, I promise; I - I need you here with me, Ember, I-..” Your voice then failed you whilst she carefully embraced you, and cradled your body close to her own, prompting your heart to skip a beat, and you to find yourself breaking down as you cried quietly into her chest, clinging to her as if your life depended on her being with you the way that she was, now. “Don’t leave me, please,” you whispered against the crook of her neck, and she would nod slowly, before lifting her right hand up to the back of your head again, soothing you instantly as you found yourself managing to fall quiet after a little while, half-asleep, and no longer shaking within her arms.

“I’ll never leave you, I promise,” she cooed gently, her voice close to a whisper, and you would express relief subconsciously, a soft smile even tugging at your lips - what had you done to deserve someone as perfect and caring as her? “Do you need anything, before we say goodnight, and I try and close my eyes for some shut-eye?” She inquired, and you would hesitate, before shyly glancing up at her again.

“C-Could you-.. give me some kisses, maybe? I’m-.. I’m needy,” you managed, your voice unusually small, before you perched yourself up a little upon your left eyebrow, prompting her heart to skip a beat whilst her eyes began to glint a little - how couldn’t she?

“Of course I can,” she replied, before leaning closer to you to delicately connect her lips to your own, soothing you even more somehow as you melted into the kiss, your heart already seeming to beat less uncomfortably now that your lips were against her’s again, though it still made your heart pound to be kissing her the way that you were, now, “better?”

“M-Much better,” you managed, before yawning uncontrollably, your eyelids drooping even more than they ever had, before, whilst you couldn’t help, but curse yourself for being so tired; you just wished you could stay awake for her, somehow, though at the same time you knew you’d be burdening her by doing so, or at least you assumed you would be, when the possibility of being able to stay awake with you made her happy, instead of concerned about her being, “t-thank you, Ember, for everything - goodnight.”

“Night,” she whispered gently, before she rested her head back down upon the pillow, your arms still around her waist, and own head still rested blissfully upon her chest - how could anything ever get any better than this?

🜸🜚🜸

The next morning, you found yourselves both waking up to the blaring of the alarm coming from her watch, prompting you both to groan whilst you stretched awake, and begrudgingly opened your eyes. Embry then remembered the situation, a pained expression on her face whilst her heart sank; she’d have to leave your side again, soon, as she took up her watch, and switched off the alarm - why did they have to have them, anyway? She knew the Skin-eaters probably wouldn’t be able to hear it; the walls were thick, here, but it was annoying, nonetheless, something she guessed the Commanders liked to impose upon those below them within the base.

“Ember,” you managed a little sleepily, and she would falter upon hearing your voice as she glanced over at you, her eyes glinting a little as soon as they locked with your’s in the best way possible, “you - you don’t have to leave yet, do you?”

Her heart dropped again, before she winced, and hesitantly averted her gaze, prompting your own heart to begin aching excruciatingly alongside her’s; you hated being away from her.

“I - I don’t know,” she mused, her voice barely audible, and you would frown, before nodding gravely, though you wished you both could spend some more time together before she had to depart from your side again; you hated whenever there were gaps between you both, and knew you still had to tell her about your father’s creating of the Skin-eaters now tormenting you both as well as the others, something that would further mentally burden you if you kept it hidden away from her any longer than you already had, “the shifts usually start quite early, so-.. I should probably get dressed, at least, just-.. just so I’m ready, y’know, but-..”

You would hesitate, the words sticking in your throat; you longed to ask her to stay with you; longed to try and prove to her that - though your father had done what he did - you loved her, and always would, no matter what; you’d never do anything to hurt her, if ever she assumed that maybe - being associated with the creator of the Apocalypse, you were just using her, when you could never do something like that to anyone, especially not her - you’d never be able to forgive yourself, if ever you tried, not that you ever would in any circumstance, as long as her life wasn’t on the line.

“Let’s-.. Let’s just stay in bed for five more minutes,” you managed a little exasperatedly, your voice briefly trembling, and she would falter, feeling even worse as she hated hurting you the way she could tell she just had, but she didn’t know what else to do; she knew the Commanders wouldn’t let her stay behind, without them discarding her and your second chance, and throwing you out of the base to fend for yourselves against the Skin-eaters, and rival groups beyond the walls of the last standing military base in the country, “Ember, please-”

“I’m sorry, baby, but - you know I can’t, right? The Commanders-”

“I need you,” you whined, sitting up alongside her as she made to get up off of the bed, knowing she had to get dressed, and fast, if she wanted to keep you and her safe with a roof over your heads of some strong kind, “please - Ember, I - I can’t do this without you; I know you’ll come back to me, but - but I-”

“Babe,” she cooed gently, her voice soothing you instantly as you fell quiet, revelling in how it felt to have her holding your hands blissfully within her own as your eyes locked with hers again, and heart seemed to synchronise with her own without you both even realising it, but you could feel something suggesting that it was happening, and it was something you’d never felt before, until now, “it’s okay; everything’s going to be okay, I promise - look, if you ever need me, just-..” She looked around for a moment, before taking up her black necklace, and carefully setting it down within your right palm, and you couldn’t help, but close your fingers around it subconsciously, feeling warm and fuzzy again whilst she smiled lovingly over at you, and delicately drew her thumb over the back of your hand, wondering how your skin was so soft, and beautiful, like you, the thought overwhelming her all over again as blood began to rush up to her cheeks; you’d never cease to make her blush, the way she always did whenever you both were together. “Hold this, and think of me,” she cooed, and you would nod, whilst your own cheeks began to heat up; she was too good to you, and you still couldn’t fathom why - no matter how much she told you, you’d never understand why she loved a supposed nobody like you.

“Always,” you whispered, before she leaned forward timidly, and lifted her right hand up to your left cheek, prompting you to melt into her touch instantly whilst you admired her eyes again; you’d never get enough of them, nor would you ever get enough of her, as you tried to fight back a dreamt sigh - this was all you’d ever wanted; being with her, if only your father had never created the Skin-eaters in the first place, maybe things would be even better, somehow.

“Before I go,” she began again timidly, “d-do you need anything? I want to make sure you’re comfortable, a-and, y’know, w-whilst I’m-..”

“There is-.. one thing,” you mused, whilst a soft smile began to tug at your lips again, “I’m in need of affection - e-even more of it.”

“I see,” Embry replied a little suggestively, flustering you even more as she raised her eyebrows a little, and smirked in your direction, “well? What do you want me to do for you?”

“C-Can we - Can we cuddle? Please?” You requested, your voice small, as if you were afraid that maybe she’d deny what you’d asked of her, when that was something she could never do to you, as she nodded, and slowly wrapped her arms around you, soothing you instantly as you returned the embrace, burying your face into the crook of her neck - why couldn’t you both just stay like this, forever? She was the only world you knew, now - you just wished you, her, and Akaya, could live far away from the mess your father had created, if only it could at least feel as if it were possible, somehow.

🜚

As soon as she’d gone, you found yourself full of dread. You paced around her room occasionally, not forgetting to gently squeeze her necklace every once in a while. It did make you feel better, until you were reminded of the Skin-eaters outside as you heard an occasional unnatural squeal, before a flurry of gunshots rang out, and your heart began to ache excruciatingly again. You just wished you could have gone with her, drawing in a barely audible shaky breath, before you hastily walked out of her quarters, and speed-walked toward the surveillance room - if you couldn’t be there with her, at least have them let you see that she was okay.

All the way, you gently squeezed the necklace within your right hand, trying to focus your mind on the task at hand. You would have made it sooner, if you’d not seen Pedro at the end of the hallway. As soon as you noticed him, you faltered, your eyes darkening, whilst your heart began to race overwhelmingly again. You couldn’t move, terrified; your mind brought you back to that night - how he’d forced you into his room, before he pinned you down onto his bed. You remembered staring over at the opposite, blank wall tearfully, unable to think whilst he violated you. Your tears began to glisten again, whilst your hands shook, and blood began to boil; he had no right to hurt you like that, did he?

You faltered again, bowing your head whilst small tears began to run slowly down your cheeks. Did you deserve it? You weren’t sure anymore. Your heart sank; you’d still not told Embry the truth about your father; you could have done something to stop this Apocalypse from happening. Maybe you did. God, that hurt, more than anything else had ever pained you before as you scowled down at the ground, before hastily dragging yourself away, turning a sharp corner into the next hallway whilst you tried to stop thinking about the hurt he’d caused you that night, before Embry had found you, and carried you back to your room, crying uncontrollably into her left shoulder.

You lingered by the door of the surveillance room for a moment, needing to hastily wipe your eyes, before you sucked in a breath, tried to recompose yourself, and pressed down the door handle.

“Y/n? What the hell are you doing in here?” Alexa questioned; she was often on surveillance duty, but you wouldn’t focus on her, at first, hastily walking up to the cameras that were pinned to the uniforms of those currently out looking for survivors, as well as to kill some of the surrounding Skin-eaters.

“Embry,” you began a little shakily, your voice barely audible, “w-which one is she?”

Alexa would hesitate, wondering why you seemed so jumpy; why your hands were shaking so much, but she thought better than to question it as she gesticulated to the feed in the top right hand corner of the screen, prompting your eyes to hastily lock onto it, and you to express relief - she was okay, that’s good; she’d just taken down another of the monsters, whilst Erica had taken down one that had tried to take her down from behind. You tried to ignore how your heart had sank upon noticing her - you could do what she was doing for Embry, of course you could; you were sure you could, so why wouldn’t they let you join her and the others out there?

“Hey,” Alexa began again gently, noticing that you were trying not to cry again, before she timidly made to hold your left hand within her right one, prompting you to jump back, subconsciously withdrawing your hand from her’s whilst your eyes widened a little, and you found yourselves forgetting how to breathe for a moment - you knew she didn’t mean to scare you like she had, it was just hard to stop yourself from panicking whenever someone touched you so unexpectedly the way she just had, especially after you’d seen Pedro again a brief moment ago, now, “shit, sorry, I - I didn’t mean-..” She sighed, and you would frown, feeling a little guilty for reacting the way you had as you bowed your head a little, your eyes darkening again. “Sorry,” she repeated a little quieter, remembering what had happened to you, and how Embry had told her not to do anything like what she’d just done after what Pedro had done to you shortly before that brief moment had occurred, “a-are you alright? Do you need anything, or-?”

“N-No, I’m fine, I just-.. I just wanted to make sure Ember-.. Embry was okay,” you answered, whilst wincing, and cursing yourself for accidentally blurting out her nickname the way you had, though Alexa already knew about you both unbeknownst to you; Embry had told her about your and her relationship not too long ago, now, feeling she could trust her friend to keep it a secret the way you’d both decided to do so, after you’d officially got together, “sorry.”

“It’s okay!” Alexa chimed, whilst beaming up at you, before she pat the seat beside her, prompting you to hesitate, before you sat down beside her, and fidgeted with your fingers. “I get it; y’all are close, right? It’s normal,” she reassured you gently, but you still seemed a little on edge, “hey - she’s gonna be okay, I promise. You can stay in here, if you want to? Keep an eye on her and the others with me? How does that sound?”

“Okay, I guess,” you mused, and Alexa would nod, before smiling kindly over at you, and looking over the feed again just to make sure nothing had changed whilst you both were talking the way you had been a brief moment ago, “I just-.. wish I could be out there with her.”

“Oh,” Alexa replied, before glancing over at you again, her eyes full of the sympathy she clearly was holding for you during this moment in time; she knew it was a hard situation, especially during times like these, “I see.”

“H-Hey, do you-.. know at all why they - they’re keeping me in here?” You inquired, and Alexa would falter, appearing reluctant, before she looked away again, prompting your heart to sink; she definitely knew something, it just seemed as if she felt she shouldn’t tell you, for a reason unbeknownst to you.

“S-Sorry, I-.. I don’t,” she claimed, her voice barely audible, full of guilt as well as nerves, “they just-.. said something about..” She sighed, before turning to face you fully again; she couldn’t lie to you; she just couldn’t, knowing it would only hurt you even more, and she could tell it had as you appeared dejected, staring down at your hands again. “They don’t trust you,” she admitted apologetically, prompting you to glance up at her hastily whilst your eyebrows furrowed again, and your heart sank once more - why wouldn’t they? You knew you’d been bitten by one of the Skin-eaters, but what was there to say that might suggest you could become one of them any minute now? You sighed heavily, before grunting barely audibly, and looking back up at Embry’s feed - she was hugging Erica, now, and you weren’t sure why, but the image made your blood boil a little, before the pain set in again. “But you’re lucky, y’know,” she added in a quieter voice, as if she’d be punished for telling you what she was about to say, next, directing your attention away from the feed again, and boy were you glad that she had, though the pain didn’t go away from when you’d caught them hugging on Embry’s feed, “they keep the others who got bites like your’s in the cellar, after they’re recovered - you would have been stuck down there with them, if they weren’t determined to keep an even closer eye on you, the way they kinda can if you’re up here, and not down there - you know what I mean?”

“I guess,” you murmured, before shrugging, and appearing a little puzzled, “but-.. it’s not like they can keep an eye on me all the time, though, can they? I mean-..”

“They can, if they have people reporting back to them about you,” she clarified, and you would falter, a pained expression on your face as you looked over at her again, prompting her to wince once more as she began to realise that she’d basically insinuated that Embry was only close to you to keep a report on you, when that was far from true, “b-but that doesn’t mean-”

“I know what it means,” you uttered, whilst you tried to ignore how excruciating the ache within your heart and chest was - why did you ever think that maybe Embry could feel the same way about you, when you were nothing, compared to her? You drew in a barely audible shaky breath, before you glanced tearfully up at Embry’s feed again; she was still holding Erica, as if she were wounded, whilst she shot down another of the Skin-eaters, but that didn’t stop them from surrounding them both. “Erica, she’s hurt,” you mused, and Alexa would hastily glance up to Erica’s own feed, faltering when she noticed that she and Embry were being surrounded by the Skin-eaters.

“Shit!” She hissed exasperatedly, before lifting up the glass screen covering the red buttons beneath it, all labelled with the names of those currently outside of the base, the number of their feeds beside each of their names just to make it easier, you guessed, to keep an eye on everyone who was still left out there, and hadn’t yet fallen to the monsters.

“I’m going out there,” you stated through gritted teeth, getting up whilst Alexa erratically pressed down upon the red buttons labelled ‘Embry’ and ‘Erica’, sounding out an alarm somewhere distant, as if she were calling back-up for the pair.

“What? Y/n, no,” you picked up one of the guns hanging up on the wall; they often kept some spare in the room for emergencies upon wherever they had situated the rest of their weapon racks, “you can’t-”

“I can, and I will,” you insisted determinedly, and Alexa would falter, the look in your eyes scaring her, “I have to save them, I-.. if anyone’s going down today, it’s going to be me, and not them, and none of you are gonna stop me, okay? So don’t you dare let them try - tell the Commanders I’ve gone back to my room, and then when, or if they see me on the cameras, they won’t have time to stop me, okay?”

Alexa wasn’t sure what to do, as she hesitated, before begrudgingly nodding, though she felt ashamed of herself for doing so, knowing what it was that you were intending to do; if you did die today, she would feel responsible for not stopping you as you hastily walked out of the room, and began to run as fast as you can down the hallway, not stopping for anyone, or anything, not until you were with Embry and Erica. Not even Pedro, and the traumatic memories he’d plagued you with recently, could stop you the way they had earlier, as you whizzed by him, shoving him out of your way before he could even spit a taunt out as you went, only briefly stopping to press - hard - upon one of the buttons, opening one of the exits which would allow you to get out there to where the others - including Embry and Erica - currently were, still clinging to one another whilst trying their best to fend for themselves against the monsters gradually getting closer and closer to them with each second that passed.

🜸

“We’re gonna be okay,” Embry stated, her voice a little breathless, and barely audible, whilst Erica shook within her embrace, tears clouding her vision; the scratch she’d received was painful, and it was something strange, as it began to feel like something had been released within her, like a foreign object embedding itself into skin, “I promise - someone’ll hear us, and we’ll get you back to the base to be treated, okay?”

Erica couldn’t speak, nodding hastily, as well as weakly, whilst she whimpered quietly, and the next Skin-eater hissed, before it lunged toward the pair, only to be downed by Embry before it could get any closer - they seemed to have a method of attack that was becoming obvious to her. They circled, before crying out a warning to their contemporaries, and then lunging, and - though it was getting easier, now, for Embry to therefore keep track of them, she couldn’t help, but wish she had taken more bullets with her, now. She only thanked God that you were still inside, and therefore the safety of the base away from the monsters, but - little did she know - you were still running, and using the pocket knife you’d managed to take up along the way - one of the soldiers who were now gone must have dropped it - to knock and slash at the plants that were blocking your way; everything had seemed to grow a little more, now, ever since the Apocalypse had begun - maybe the Skin-eaters had begun spreading their energy elsewhere, too. The thought prompted you to shudder, your blood running cold - could there be something even bigger, now, right beneath where you were standing.

There was no time for you to be thinking about that, as you pressed on, slashing one more of the hybrid or mutant plants out of your way, before you heard a nearby gunshot, followed by someone crying out a faint ‘no’.

“I have to do it, Erica,” Embry insisted, raising her gun up at the sky, “there’s someone here, and they’re either gonna help us, or kill us, but we still have your gun, right? So if anything happens-”

“You can’t do this,” Erica contradicted, “we need to focus on them-”

As if on cue, another of the Skin-eaters screeched, but Embry wouldn’t let it even begin its lunge as she hastily aimed her gun back down at it, before downing it smoothly, warily looking around at the remaining monsters, and aiming it high up again; the rest were still pursuing their circling and sizing up routine, claws seeming to strangely grow longer as they drew closer to initiating their attack.

“And I am, aren’t I? Just - try and stay calm, okay? I’m gonna get their attention; I know I will,” she continued, before pulling down on the trigger, and shooting up her last bullets into the sky, startling you as you almost dropped your own gun, looking toward the commotion.

“Shit,” you spat, before running toward them, and almost tripping up, allowing the knife to slip from your fingers, but you couldn’t waste anymore time - the noise would only agitate them even more, and if the Skin-eaters got anymore ferocious than they were, now, things would only get worse than they were, before.

“Fuck,” Erica whined feebly, before hastily raising her hands shakily up to her ears, and that was when Embry noticed the black markings on her hands, “E-Embry what the fuck did you do!?”

“Erica,” Embry spoke up warily, her eyes fixated upon the dark veins spreading across her hands, as if something was growing inside her, “shit, w-what’s-”

Another screech, and Embry was out of bullets. She made to reach for Erica’s gun, but something made her snatch it away, before she pressed Embry down upon the ground, and aimed her gun at her companion’s head, startling her as Embry’s breathing pattern grew to be staggered and uneven, the Skin-eaters seeming to still around the two, as if they were waiting for Erica to prove herself, a behaviour she’d never witnessed from them before, until now.

“Ember,” Erica mustered up in a voice weaker than she’d ever heard it before, and she frowned when she noticed that Erica was trying not to cry, her finger shaking on the trigger, “Ember, I - I can’t-”

“It’s okay,” Embry cooed gently, not wanting her friend to panic, especially not in a situation like this, “just-.. put down the gun, okay? You can fight this, I know you can, you just need to put the gun down, and try to stay calm for me, can you do that?”

Erica hesitated, her heart pounding unnaturally whilst her eyes seemed to darken a little, like the Skin-eaters eyes; she was changing, and Embry didn’t know what to do.

“I - I don’t know, I - I don’t know, okay!” She cried, a strained sob escaping her lips whilst Embry tensed up, glancing down at the trigger again - it was almost there; she’d be dead, soon, if it got pulled any further back. She could almost feel the release of the spring as she waited for the bang; waited for the bullet to end her life, and she couldn’t help, but think of you, where she left you back at the base, prompting a soft smile to tug at her lips, until she remembered she was about to be taken away from you, only making her feel worse as she subconsciously shook her head, and managed to - as she regained feeling within her hands - grab at the barrel of the gun, before she hastily directed it away from her face, and the bullet embedded itself into the ground to her left.

The next few moments seemed to go by in a blur. Embry was still on the ground, a strained and feeble cry escaping her lips whilst she clung to her ears, them ringing excruciatingly beneath her palms whilst Erica raised her gun back up to her companion’s forehead, only to have it shot from her hands, before she herself was shot in the neck, making a gurgling-like sound, before she lifted her left hand up to the wound you’d created within it.

“Embry!” You called, your eyes glinting a little as soon as they fell upon her, before you rushed up to her, and faltered as soon as you noticed the other Skin-eaters, still watching you both keenly, before they looked toward each other, and the one in the middle screeched, before lunging toward you. Your blood ran cold, and you found yourself unable to move for a moment, until it had managed to pin you upon the ground, and you were thrown back to that night again. Pedro chuckled wickedly above you whilst he held a knife to the side of your neck, and used his other hand to begin undressing you upon his bed.

You whimpered barely audibly, your body beginning to shake a little whilst the fingers of your right hand tried to cling onto the gun again, only for it to be kicked away by the monster who still had you pinned upon the ground. Embry then - once her hearing had begun to return to some form of normality - looked toward you, her eyelids heavy, and vision a little blurry, until she narrowed her eyes, and your voice began to ring out in her head again - you’d called for her. How had you called for her? You were meant to still be within the base; in her room, how could you be-?

Her vision began to clear, and her blood ran cold - you were there, a few paces away from her, and you had nothing to defend yourself with; this could be the day she lost you. Her heart skipped a beat, and her soul began to become full of dread - no, she couldn’t lose you; not like this.

“Y-Y/n!” She cried, her voice a little hoarse, and the Skin-eater above you stopped, before looking back at her sharply, and hissing again. “Run!” She instructed desperately, but you couldn’t move, still; you couldn’t leave her there, even as the Skin-eater let you go, and began to stalk toward her, instead of you.

“I’m not leaving you!” You retorted, before pushing yourself to get up off of the ground, picking up your gun again as you went; you wouldn’t let it hurt her; you couldn’t. You’d never be able to forgive yourself, if you lost her today, and were terrified of losing her, somehow, so you made it your mission not to do so, as you hastily lifted your gun, before shooting the monster in the back of the head, downing it instantly, before you had to hastily turn and take down the last of them who had previously been surrounding her and Erica. Once you’d downed them, you threw down your gun, and rushed over to her, before you fell upon your knees by her side, and cradled her body close to you. “I-.. I’m so sorry, Ember, I-.. I love you so much - I should - I should have come earlier; should have been here, I-”

“No, Y/n,” she cooed gently whilst she returned the embrace, clinging to you whilst you both revelled in the moment, and wondered why you were still alive; how you were still alive, but at the same time you were immensely grateful for the luck you’d seemed to encounter, still being here together, until you remembered what Alexa had told you, and your heart sank again, “hey-.. you shouldn’t be apologising for something like this; you didn’t even know what was gonna happen. However, I do deserve an apology regarding how I seem to recall telling you to stay inside, earlier, only for you to be out here, doing the opposite of what I told you to do?”

“I couldn’t let you get hurt,” you murmured dejectedly, “E-Ember, I-.. I’m sorry, n-not just for breaking my promise to stay inside, but-.. for-.. what I did, to Erica. She meant a lot to you, p-probably still does, and - and I-..”

“You did what you had to do,” she reassured you, but you couldn’t help, but shake your head gravely; you evidently thought otherwise, though you couldn’t imagine why - you just wanted to make Embry happy, but when you saw Erica threatening her life, you couldn’t do anything else, but shoot her down, and you hated yourself for it, “we-.. we couldn’t save her, Y/n; we just couldn’t, okay? Hey, look at me-” You faltered, feeling something stabbing into your back, before your eyes darkened a little, and you began to feel empty all of a sudden, your heart aching excruciatingly again; you didn’t want her to see this, as the monster - still looking quite like Erica - pulled you away from her, and flung you against a tree, before her attention was directed onto Embry, and you began to feel hopeless. “Shit!” She spat, her voice briefly trembling, before she looked around, and her gaze fell upon your gun. She bee-lined for it, thinking she’d be able to reach it, until Erica managed to grab at her, and bite at her left shoulder, prompting her to cry out in pain whilst she struggled against her ex-companion’s grasp, only to be roughly pinned down upon the ground beneath her, making her feel dizzy after the back of her head had seemed to collide with one of the rocks beneath it. Erica then turned back toward you, making a hissing sound, before she jumped up onto one of the branches above you, and then fell back down upon you, digging her claws into you, before she began to extend them whilst you began to lose consciousness, alongside Embry, still trying her best to stay strong for you, somehow, despite the situation you both found yourselves in. “No,” she whispered shakily, noticing Erica digging her talons into your chest, before your body began to shake a little, and Embry felt more hopeless and lost than she ever had before, until the other soldiers finally found you both, and shot down Erica before she could take your body over entirely like the previous Skin-eater had been doing to Erica, before this moment in time.

🜚

As soon as you came to, your eyelids fluttering open, you were stunned by the bright lights above you. You didn’t realise you’d fallen unconscious, until now; all you remembered was being picked up off of the ground, before everything seemed to go black around you. You groaned, tightly shutting your eyes again, until you felt someone holding your hand to your right, and they snapped open again, your body jolting in response to the feeling, until you noticed Embry was walking hastily beside the stretcher you were being transported upon toward the medical quarters within the base.

Your heart skipped a beat as soon as you saw her, whilst your eyes glinted a little, as if you’d not previously been in pain; she made you feel as if you were stronger than you believed yourself to be, as long as she were beside you the way that she was, now. You couldn’t help, but smile weakly up at her whilst she gently squeezed your hand, and you realised you couldn’t hear anything for a moment - her mouth was moving, but you couldn’t hear her voice, prompting your heart to sink, and smile to fade.

“E-” You began, before faltering upon there being no sound produced from your own mouth, either. Shit - could you be dreaming? Dead? Were you just imagining this moment in time? You didn’t know anymore, and it was terrifying, until you noticed the pained expression on her face, before she looked over at the other soldier to your left, but you found you couldn’t pry your gaze from her, silently begging her to help you; you didn’t know what to do, and it was starting to panic you more than anything else ever had before - what if you’d never be able to hear her voice again? What if you’d never be able to tell her the truth about your father? What if she’d let you go, and not want you anymore, seeing you as a burden even after all you both had already been through together? What if you-

That was when you heard it. It was barely audible, at first, but right next to your ear - a small clink of some strange tool you didn’t know the existence of, until now; until you felt a brief shock, winced, and were invaded by several voices all at once, including one dog barking. Akaya must be with you, too, prompting you to express relief, before you began to relax again, glancing timidly up at Embry whilst she looked back down at you, ignoring the other two that were currently arguing about whether the machine should have been used, or not, considering they had a limited amount of the tools that had just been used upon you to try and fix your hearing after Erica had attacked you the way she had not too long ago, now.

“Y/n?” You faltered upon hearing her voice, your heart racing again whilst you began to feel warm and fuzzy inside all over again. You couldn’t help, but will her to do it again, desperate to hear it just so you knew you weren’t dreaming; just so you knew that you were still alive, and hadn’t yet been taken away from her too soon the way you had feared you might had been, before this moment in time. “Y/n,” she repeated exasperatedly; desperate, “baby, please-.. say something; just-.. anything; I need to know you’re okay.”

“I-..” You began timidly, testing out your own voice again - you could hear it this time, good, but that didn’t make it any less raspier than it was, as if you’d almost had the whole of your life stolen from you by the Skin-eaters who had ambushed you both a brief moment ago. “I missed - missed you so much,” you managed weakly, and a strained sob escaped her lips, before she carefully wrapped her arms around you, though it was awkward for her to do so right now, “I thought I lost you, in - in there; in the dark, a-and-.. and I didn’t know what to do, I-..”

“You’ll never lose me,” she vowed, before carefully lifting her right hand up to your left cheek, soothing you instantly as you melted into her touch, and smiled lovingly up at her, “I love you so much.”

“I - I love you, too,” you replied a little shyly, forgetting that the other soldiers were in the room with you both, “I-.. I always have, a-and I always will, I promise.”

“We’re almost there, now,” Alexa informed, and you would frown subconsciously upon hearing her voice, remembering what she’d told you earlier.

‘They can, if they have people reporting back to them about you,’ her voice rang out in your head, and your heart sank even more; you’d completely forgotten about your and her conversation earlier, until now, and it made you wonder why Embry was here with you again - was she just here to watch you? Make sure that you didn’t hurt anyone within the base? You guessed it wouldn’t surprise you, as you averted your gaze down to your hands whilst your eyes began to darken again - you’d taken Erica away from her, and you couldn’t help, but think about how close they used to be, only making you feel worse; all you’d ever been was a burden on her, and that was all you knew, now.

“I’ll call you when she’s done, okay? Claire’ll probably not appreciate us allowing you in whilst she’s treating her, so-..” Embry would frown, before nodding gravely, and glancing down at you again; she didn’t like to think that she’d have to part from you all over again after she’d almost lost you like she had, or thought she might, earlier.

“Right,” she murmured, whilst you warily looked up at her, evidently nervous about being parted from her again despite your previous thoughts regarding your and Alexa’s previous conversation, implying that Embry didn’t actually feel the same way for you, when she - unbeknownst to you - had loved you ever since she had first met you, and was sure she always would, no matter what the future held for you both after today.

A metal door ahead of you both slowly opened, before Claire appeared behind it, urgently gesticulating for them to bring you in so she could hastily treat you, before you could bleed out anymore than you already had managed to before they had found you and Embry in the states that you were.

“Quick - bring her in here,” she demanded, and both Alexa and the other soldier, Shyro, made to stop you by the door, only making Claire even more impatient than she was, before, to get started on her treating of your wounds, “what the hell are you doing? She could die-”

“They need a moment,” Alexa retorted, silencing her friend, before Embry timidly turned to face you again, and you felt more vulnerable than you ever had before.

“Y-Y/n, I-..” She began in a voice smaller than you’d ever heard it before, whilst small tears began to cloud your vision; you couldn’t bear to see her like this, especially when you knew it was because of you.

“I’m going to be okay,” you promised, and she would falter, before smiling softly over at you, and nodding timidly whilst you both admired one another for a moment, “s-so-.. I guess we aren’t a-.. secret, anymore?”

Embry winced, before nodding faintly, and glancing up at the others for a brief moment; she’d not meant to blow your and her cover like that, but the dire situation had called for desperate measures that meant your and her exposure - it always would, she determined, if ever she came close to losing you again the way she did, not too long ago, now.

“I guess not,” she agreed, before giggling softly, and crouching down beside you, “but-.. I think, n-now that we aren’t, I - I’m glad, because-.. it was getting painful, not being able to kiss you in front of the others.”

“Right?” You chimed a little exasperatedly, your eyes glinting again whilst you giggled softly alongside her.

“H-Hey, erm-.. I-..” She drew in a shaky breath, before briefly averting her gaze for a moment as if she were terrified of something; of somehow losing you, if she ever said something wrong, and it made you grow nervous alongside her as you wondered why she was even shaking a little; why her eyes were refusing to meet your’s for a moment, until she spoke up again, and everything began to make sense regarding why she seemed so nervous the way she did, a brief moment ago. “When we were out there, a-and I saw you get-.. get impaled by Erica, I-.. I started thinking about things-.. things I’ve never-.. thought about before, the way that I did, when I thought I lost you-.. I felt-.. stuck, a-and I didn’t know what to do; I tried to get to you, but-.. it was like-.. something was holding me, o-or-.. I don’t know, and I - I’m so sorry, I-.. I should have done something, but-.. I-..”

“Ember,” you cooed gently, not wanting her to blame herself for what had happened to you both not too long ago, now, but before you could continue, and reassure her that it was okay; that you understood, she continued, desperate to try and find the right words she wanted to say, and share with you the way she had ever since that moment in time; ever since she’d thought she could lose you, until the other soldiers had found you the way they had, beyond the base walls.

“No, Y/n,” she interjected weakly, small tears beginning to leak from her eyes whilst she tried not to break down in front of you, especially not now - not when she was about to do something she’d dreamt of doing ever since the night she’d first found you, and nursed you back to health alongside her companions, “it’s not okay; I should have helped you, somehow, even - even if-.. even if it meant me losing my life, for you, b-because I owe you that much, and more, f-for making me happier than I’ve ever been, before, a-and I-.. I was hoping that - maybe, a-after I was thinking about-.. about how things would have been, if I did lose you, I-.. fuck, this is-.. I don’t know why this is so hard, but-.. Y/n, will - will you-.. will you honestly make me the happiest woman in the world, by - by becoming my wife?” You would appear taken aback, not realising you’d begun to cry alongside her, until you regained full consciousness, and closed your mouth.

“E-Ember, I-.. What?” You couldn’t believe it; couldn’t believe she’d actually want to ask you to marry her, especially after you’d been made to think that she didn’t actually love you, the way that you loved her, and had ever since you’d first met her. And it was definitely a surprise when you believed yourself to be nothing, compared to her, a pained expression on your face whilst you recalled what had happened to Cynthia, all because of your father’s creation of the Skin-eaters. That was another thing; you’d still not told her about how it was all his fault that the Apocalypse had started; how you could have put an end to it, somehow, the way you believed you could, even though you had been smaller, before you began to understand what he was doing, the time he began to abuse you more, and even torture you by locking you within the lab, when it was dark, and the Skin-eaters were all hissing at you from all around you, in their cages. The memory prompted a shiver to run through you again whilst your blood ran cold; you’d never forget those days, no matter how much you longed to do so. You couldn’t help, but think about the pictures in Embry’s room of her and Cynthia: how they hugged; smiled; cradled one another; how Cynthia kissed Embry on the cheek whilst she giggled, and tried to hide that she was blushing from the camera. Your heart sank; you’d never be able to make her happy, the way her previous fiancé had. “Embry,” you murmured dejectedly, and she would falter upon hearing how disheartened you sounded, making her heart ache excruciatingly all of a sudden, now that she began to recall that you rejecting her proposal had always been a possibility.

“You don’t have to say ‘yes’,” she reassured you, and god did her voice make your heart break right then and there; you didn’t want her to think that you didn’t love her enough to want to spend the rest of your life, and more by her side, when that was something you’d always dreamt of being able to do; you just wanted to make her happy, and you were terrified of fucking everything up again somehow in the future - hell, you knew you probably would as soon as you told her the truth about how the Apocalypse had started, “I just-.. you don’t have to say anything, even, I-.. shit, I - I’m so-.. I’m sorry, it - it was probably too soon, anyway, I-”

“Yes,” you blurted out, without even thinking again about the many ways you believed you could ruin everything, and she would falter, falling quiet as soon as she heard your voice again, prompting her eyes to widen a little, whilst her gaze locked with your own again in the best way possible.

“Yes?” She replied breathlessly, her voice briefly trembling whilst you couldn’t help, but smile warmly over at her, lifting your right hand up to her left cheek to delicately brush away her tears using your thumb. “Y-Yes as in, it - it was too soon? O-Or, y-yes as in - as in you do want to-?”

“I want to marry you,” you clarified a little shyly; it was your turn to grow a little flustered, now, as blood began to rush up to your cheeks alongside her own, “I-.. I love you, Embry, I-.. I’d do anything to become Mrs Hawthorn.”

“That’s - That’s good, because - because I’d do anything to become Mrs L/n, too,” she admitted, and your heart began to pound again; you just couldn’t help, but think: ‘why?’

The thought made your heart sink again; you knew you’d never believe yourself to be good enough for her, no matter what she said or tried to do to prove otherwise; to try and show you that you were more than enough for her, and always would be, no matter what the future held in store for you both, but you guessed you’d just have to try and live with it, and try to go on making up for it by doing all you possibly could to make her happy, so you also knew you should start by being fully honest with her, right, before you both could progress any further with your recent engagement.

Embry then made to take off the ring her mother had given her, prompting your heart to skip a beat, before you hastily shook your head, and held her hands within your’s, keeping the ring within her palm.

“E-Ember, don’t,” you managed exasperatedly, your voice close to a whisper, before she faltered again, and warily glanced up at you, her heart seeming to stop for a moment within her chest, “if - if we’re going to do this, I need you to know something about me; m-my father, I-..”

She would hesitate, before nodding timidly, and trying not to grit her teeth upon being reminded about your father, and all that he had done to you, not too long ago, now, before you had managed to run away from him, and he had been killed by the very monsters he had created.

“Okay,” she replied gently, before gently squeezing your right hand within her left one to provide you with encouragement, wanting you to feel as if you could tell her anything, no matter what it was you may be about to reveal to her, prompting her heart to skip a beat - what would your revelation do to you both? How would it change things? How would it make her, or even you, feel? She tried to push the questions aside, focusing instead on you, and the love she would forever hold for you, no matter what the cost of your words might be, once you felt able to reveal them to her.

“I-.. I was too scared to tell you this before, but-.. he-..” You sighed heavily, your voice barely audible for a moment, whilst she tried to soothe you by lifting your hand up to her lips, allowing her to delicately press a kiss to the back of it, comforting you more than anything else ever had before. You couldn’t help, but muster up a faint smile over at her whilst you revelled in how it felt to have had her lips against the back of your hand; you’d never get over the feeling; would never be able to get used to how she made you feel as if you were the strongest person on earth, as long as she were beside you the way she was, now, loving you the way you had always loved her, and knew you always would, even if she decided after today that she no longer wanted you, which you feared she most likely wouldn’t as soon as she found out about your father being the instigator of the Apocalypse itself as you both knew it, today, and were suffering under it for what felt like it could be almost forever, by now. “He started this, Ember,” you uttered dejectedly, and she would falter, her eyes narrowing a little whilst she tried to make sense of what you were trying to tell her, “it’s all his fault - he started it, and I could have stopped it.”

“W-Wait a minute,” she replied a little hastily, confused as ever, “what did he start?”

You would hesitate for a moment, your eyes darkening again whilst she tried to scan them for anything she could pick up on; she didn’t want to think that you meant exactly what she was beginning to assume, but it was starting to look like you were, especially when she noticed that tears were beginning to cloud your vision again.

“The beginning, Ember,” you clarified weakly, your voice briefly trembling; the tears were gradually managing to escape now, whilst you seemed to be growing a little paler - Claire needed to treat you, and fast, if you wanted to make it out of this alive, “he started the beginning of the end.”

🜸

Embry didn’t know what to say. What was there to say in response to a revelation like that? She couldn’t help, but stare a little blankly over at you, her eyebrows furrowing a little, but before she could blurt out anything whatsoever, Claire was dropping her bomb of impatience, and making to push the stretcher inside, before she found herself stuck on the outside of the metal door, a pained expression on her face.

“Ember,” Alexa began, once Shyro and Claire had disappeared inside, “are you-?”

“What - What did she mean by that?” She uttered through gritted teeth, her voice barely audible; she was still clinging to the last remains of her hope that maybe you were talking about something else, and not the Apocalypse that had seen some of her friends dying, as well as her ex-fiancé, Cynthia, before their wedding the next day.

“Embry-”

“Alexa,” she interjected feebly, her voice briefly trembling whilst she sharply turned to face her friend, who winced, and averted her gaze down to the ground, “what did she mean?”

“You know what she meant; we all do,” she murmured apologetically, “I’m sorry, Embry. I’m so sorry, but-”

“Her father started this? He killed Cynthia?” Embry continued dejectedly, and Alexa would fall quiet, not sure what to tell her companion after what had just occurred between you both, before you’d been taken in to be treated by Claire for your recent wounds. “If he hadn’t-” Her voice failed her, before a strained sob escaped her lips; she couldn’t believe it, as Alexa carefully wrapped her arms around her friend, trying her best to provide as much comfort to her as she possibly could, but she couldn’t be comforted, crying quietly into Alexa’s left shoulder. “We - We’d have been-” She faltered, trying to stifle another sob, before Alexa lifted her right hand up to the back of Embry’s head whilst she sniffled barely audibly, and tried to recompose herself, her teeth gritting again a little whilst she thought back to how you’d told her about all the times your father had abused you; she couldn’t blame you, she just couldn’t, though it pained her more than anything to know that you were associated with the person who began the supposed ‘beginning of the end’ of the world, as you all knew it, now, Skin-eaters and rival gangs crawling all over the place. “T-The shit he’s already done to Y/n,” she hissed, her voice dangerous though it was still shaky, “a-and he pulled that crap on her, too? On all of us? And for what? I-If I could-… If I could have been there with her, I - I would have-.. he wouldn’t be-..” She drew in a shaky breath, her eyes hard whilst she held Alexa at arm’s length for a moment. “I would have shot him on the spot,” she determined, certain more than anything that she would - how couldn’t she, after all she’d already heard about him from you?

Alexa nodded slowly, before smiling reassuringly over at her, but nothing could make Embry feel better; nothing, but seeing you, again, even after what she’d just found out from you.

“I know,” she replied gently, and Embry would nod faintly, a pained expression on her face, before she bowed her head for a moment, and distracted herself with Akaya as her four-legged companion nuzzled at the palm of her left hand, sensing that she was distressed more than she ever had been, before, during this moment in time. “Hey, you - you should try and get some rest,” Alexa suggested, and Embry would shrug; the last thing she wanted to do was sleep, when you were being treated, and were probably in pain, prompting her heart to sink - if only she could be in there with you, somehow, “you look tired, and it’s been a long day; Y/n’ll probably be right as rain in the morning.”

“I guess,” she agreed half-heartedly, before forcing a smile up at her friend, “call me as soon as you can, okay?”

“I will, don’t worry,” Alexa reassured her again, and Embry would nod hesitantly in response to her, before mustering up another faint smile, and gesticulating for Akaya to follow her down the hallway, back toward her and your quarters, after finally saying ‘goodnight’ to her companion, and trying her best not to think about you all bloody, and stuck in the medical quarters without her by your side; how scared you would be, but - no matter how hard she tried - you never left her mind, to the point she felt she couldn’t wait until the morning to see you, and a new plan began to form in her head.

🜚

Once she was sure the others were either in their rooms, or on surveillance duty, Embry carefully undid the screws of one of the air vents within the base, luckily within her own room; she doubted they’d be able to catch her, or stop her from reaching you if she took this route, so why not give it a try, regardless of the possible consequences that could await her? Once she had removed the cover, she sheathed back up her pocket knife, and glanced back at Akaya who was whining quietly, evidently not feeling good about not being able to be by her companion’s side the way she wouldn’t be, if Embry took such a stealthy precaution, but she couldn’t let anything, or anyone stop her from getting to you, especially not now.

“I’ll be back soon, Kaya, I promise,” she cooed, her voice close to a whisper, but Akaya would simply grunt, before turning away from her, prompting her to frown, feeling guilty all over again; she hated seeing Akaya like this, but she knew she couldn’t leave you to suffer alone within the medical quarters after all that you and her had both been through today. “I’m sorry, girl, but-.. I have to do this, you know I do,” she added, before hastily pulling herself up into the vent, and then closing it up again; she couldn’t let herself get sidetracked, though she also hated leaving Akaya alone the way she was, now. For a moment, it felt wrong - what if Akaya was hurt by someone? Or even something? Nothing’s to say that any of you are entirely safe here; Skin-eaters might find their way in someday, or if not them, the rivals could, somehow, and if they did Embry wouldn’t be there to defend Akaya, but at the same time she wouldn’t be there to protect you. Her heart sank, and she tried to push the thought out of her head. “She’ll take care of herself; she’s stronger than you think she is,” Embry told herself half-heartedly, before crawling through the vent slowly, trying to think about which way would be the best, considering all the vents were connected to each quarter within the Survivors’ base. Eventually, she found the lesser used Kitchen, where she’d baked you your first birthday cake, prompting her to smile subconsciously upon being reminded of that night, before she sighed, and wondered why her heart was aching again; she just wished you felt as if you could tell her about the Apocalypse, before; about how your father had started it; about how it could be put down before it could progress any further across the entire planet, but then - you’d not said it could be put down. She’d have to ask you, later, if you knew of such a way to tackle the situation you all found yourselves in, as long as you were ready to tell her, she added in her head. She then proceeded to crawl through to the surveillance room, prompting her to have to fight back a grunt; it was annoying, struggling to find where exactly she wanted to go. “Really, Alexa?” She uttered, upon noticing that her friend was still awake, and doodling on the back of her hand, not at all looking up at the cameras she was meant to be paying attention to, but she couldn’t worry about that right now, reminding herself of how you were waiting for her, and could be scared, or sad, making her feel worse as she reversed herself, hoping that she’d be by your side soon, especially after you’d both not been able to say ‘goodbye’ earlier, before you’d been taken in by Claire to be treated for your wounds you’d received not too long ago, now.

As soon as she finally seemed to make it, she warily looked through the gaps of the vent cover, expressing relief when she noticed Shyro; he’d let her in, or at least she hoped he would, without getting her into trouble. Good, she didn’t need the chloroform, then, as she stuffed the little bottle back into her pocket. She then made to remove the covering that was blocking her from you, immediately getting Shyro’s attention as he stood up, and warily lifted his gun, trying to stay quiet, until he noticed Embry, and expressed relief; he’d thought maybe one of the rival groups had managed to break in, or something, as he lowered his gun back down, and wiped the sweat off of his forehead.

“Jesus Christ, Embry,” he uttered, his voice close to a whisper; he didn’t want to attract Claire’s attention, knowing she’d be more than pissed off if she came into the room to find Embry within it, when she shouldn’t be there, especially when she’d broken in using the vent shaft, and not the door, “what the hell are you doing here? You aren’t supposed to be here right now, Claire would throw a fit if she saw you-”

“I know, calm down,” she reassured, before swiftly and quietly dropping down from the vent shaft, glancing around to see if she could catch sight of you, only to find herself unable to find you within the room, prompting instantly a sense of dread to wash over her, “where’s-”

“Through that door, to your left,” he answered, and she would express relief, before smiling her thanks to him, and nodding her head, “but don’t be long in there, okay? If Claire comes out, and catches you both together in there, she’ll-”

“Kill me, probably,” she stated, “I know, but I’m not scared of her anymore, especially not right now, so - see you around.” She then wouldn’t hesitate to walk hastily toward the door Shyro had directed her to, before she opened it, and would falter as soon as she noticed you laying upon the white bed Claire had set up for you. “Y/n?” She mustered up feebly, a pained expression on her face, before she timidly inched closer to you.

“Embry?” You began timidly, your voice briefly trembling; you’d evidently been crying, prompting her heart somehow to sink even more. “I - I thought-”

She hastily rushed up to you, before carefully throwing her arms around you, and burying her face into the crook of your neck.

“I missed you,” she expressed, her voice barely audible, and weaker than you’d ever heard it before, “I couldn’t stop thinking about you, I-..”

You would appear taken aback; you didn’t think she’d still want you, after you’d told her about your father being the instigator of the Apocalypse not too long ago, now.

“You-.. aren’t angry, with me? Disappointed?” You inquired a little exasperatedly, and she would frown, before hastily shaking her head, and holding you at arms length.

“How could I be? Y-Y/n, none - none of this was your fault,” she reminded you gently, and you would frown, before bowing your head a little; you clearly still believe that at least part of it was, regardless of you being terrified of what he might do to you, if you did try to stop his operation with the Skin-eaters, “it was him, not you, remember? He started this; you had nothing to do with it-”

“I could have stopped it, Ember,” you uttered dejectedly, a pained expression on your face, “I could have stopped him-”

“You didn’t know what to do, Y/n - none of us would,” she interjected, not wanting you to blame yourself for your father’s own decisions, especially after he’d abused you and your mother the way he had, “baby, look at me.”

You hesitated, before warily glancing up at her, and she would falter for a moment upon noticing that you were trying not to cry again, only making her heart ache more alongside your own; she hated seeing you upset, and wished she could do more, somehow, to make you happy again, the way she always dreamt about doing so, ever since she’d first met, and fallen hopelessly in love with you.

“E-Ember, please, just-.. hate me; shout at me; hit me - do something,” you begged her weakly, and she would frown, a hurt look on her face - how could she ever hurt you like that? Instead, she carefully lifted her right hand up to your left cheek whilst her eyes locked with your own again in the best way possible, prompting your heart to skip a beat, and you to forget how to breathe for a moment whilst you admired her again subconsciously, as if you’d never seen something or someone so beautiful, as she was, always had been, and always would be.

She wondered if she should kiss you, for a moment, glancing down timidly at your lips, a pained expression on her face again; she was terrified of hurting you, somehow; terrified of scaring you away from her, the way she feared she would after Pedro had assaulted you the way he had not too long ago, now - there were boundaries; there always would be, and it scared her to think that if she lost control of herself, she’d lose you alongside everything within her.

“I don’t wanna hurt you,” she managed, her breathing pattern seeming to grow a little staggered and uneven alongside your’s, as if you were both trying hard not to lose control of each other at the same time, struggling to fight back your feelings for each other that longed to be explored even further, somehow, even though you weren’t exactly in the best state to do so after recently being wounded, but you were hyper aware of how she was holding you; how she was practically on top of you - well, not physically, but-.. it was close enough to be like that. “I love you, Y/n, okay? I could never do something like that to you,” she insisted, and you would frown, before nodding gravely, and timidly connecting your forehead to her own; you knew you’d never be able to change her mind, though you knew - and it hurt you to think more than anything - that she’d be better off without you. “So-.. w-what if - what if I kissed you, instead?” She suggested, surprising you, and for a moment you had to fight back the urge to say ‘yes’, desperate to feel her lips against your’s again, but - as she drew a little closer, and her lips dangerously brushed against your’s, just delicately; she’d never do anything rough to you - at least, not until you asked her to, and were completely okay with it, it was just too hard to resist her as your heart began to pound overwhelmingly again, and you couldn’t help, but melt into her touch, pressing your lips to her’s in an instant.

She shuddered as soon as you kissed her, melting into the warmth of your embrace whilst she carefully cradled your body even closer to her, your eyelids fluttering shut; you’d never felt as safe as you did, now, wrapped up within her arms, whilst your own arms were wrapped around her waist. You then hastily pulled away, wincing; you’d not asked her, first, you realised, prompting your heart to sink; you didn’t intend to lose control like that, especially not the way you had, as you recalled how Pedro had done all those things to you without you giving him consent at all to do so.

“Shit, sorry,” you whispered shakily, and Embry would hastily shake her head, not wanting you to think you’d done anything wrong the way she could tell you were, “I - I didn’t mean-.. I should have asked you, I-”

“No, Y/n,” she cooed gently, her voice soothing you instantly as you expressed relief, and locked eyes with her again, “it’s okay; I understand, okay? Besides, I was the one coming onto you, m-maybe I was doing things too quickly-”

“You should just-.. go,” you murmured dejectedly, surprising her as she fell quiet, and her eyes darkened, “I’m not worthy of your time, Ember, I-.. I never was-”

“Y/n, stop,” she whined, and you would appear surprised upon hearing the pain within her voice, prompting you to glance up at her again only to find that small tears had begun to cloud her vision alongside your own, “I-.. you are worthy of my time; you’re worthy of all of it, okay? You always have been, and you always will be, so don’t ever go and think that you’re not good enough for me, because you are; you’re more than enough for me, even - I love you.”

“I just-.. don’t know why,” you murmured in a voice close to a whisper; broken, the way it used to be, after she’d first found you, and you had been violated by Pedro, “why would someone as perfect as you ever-.. ever want to waste their time on someone-.. someone like me?”

“Because you’re everything to me, Y/n,” she answered confidently, whilst you warily looked up at her, and tried not to glance down at her lips again, “you always have been - w-whenever you’ve walked into a room, and I’ve been there, I - I felt like-.. like maybe things would be okay, as long as you were there. As soon as I see you, I - I don’t know what it is, but-.. it’s like - something lights up, in me; my head’s clearer than it ever has been, before, a-and the world seems brighter, and like less of a bad place than I thought it was, just because-.. because of you, and then when you leave-.. it all just-.. gets dark, again, and I don’t know what to do with myself. It’s you, Y/n, it’s always been you, for me, and that will never change, I promise, no matter what.”

You couldn’t speak, for a moment, the tears that had been cloud in your vision now slowly running down your cheeks whilst you tried to recompose yourself, a lump forming within your throat; nothing had ever felt like this before, and you’d certainly never felt this vulnerable, yet sure, before, of all that you’d never understood, until you first met, and had fallen for her ever since your gaze had first been blessed by her presence, and frame - everything about her would forever be perfect to you, and you were willing more than anything just to protect, and treasure her with your life, too, no matter what the future held for you both after today.

“I love you so much,” you whispered shakily, before you buried your face into her left shoulder, and cried quietly against it, her rubbing your back to try and provide comfort to you whilst she herself was struggling not to cry alongside you.

“I - I love you, too, Y/n L/n, and I always will, I promise, no matter what,” she cooed, her voice briefly trembling, before you timidly smiled up at her, and she carefully brushed away your tears using the thumb of her right hand, only for you to melt into her touch whilst you both locked eyes again in the best way possible, feeling as if nothing could ever hurt you again - not even Claire’s ranting could reach you both, as long as you were together the way that you were, now.

“S-So-.. you-.. you probably - have a few questions you - you wanna ask me, right? A-About my dad, a-and the Skin-eaters?” You guessed timidly, evidently nervous, and she would hesitate; she couldn’t deny that she had thought of a few, but she didn’t want you to feel as if you had to answer any of them, yet - not until you were better, and felt as if you could again.

“There are-.. some, but-.. you need to rest, first,” she advised delicately, and you would appear taken aback by her suggestion, before hesitantly nodding, and smiling weakly over at her, “want me to stay with you, and keep you some company? T-That is, until Claire kicks me out, y’know-..”

“S-Sure,” you replied timidly, and she would smile softly over at you, glad that you’d accepted her request, before you carefully scooted over a little upon the bed for her, and continued before she could protest, not wanting to take up any space that you might need more than her, right now, “come on in.”

🜸

Embry felt luckier than she’d ever been, before, as she cradled you close to her, her arms around you, protectively stationed beneath your breasts (which she were sure, now, weren’t covered beneath your bandages), not that she had been looking (or had she?). She winced; she knew she shouldn’t be thinking about progressing like that with you yet, especially after what you’d been through with Pedro violating you, and you recently being wounded by a Skin-eater who used to be her companion, Erica. You timidly glanced back at her, before smiling softly in her direction, and affectionately connecting your forehead to her’s; you just missed staring into her eyes; being that close to her, though your bodies were already touching during this moment in time more than they ever had before.

“H-Hey, can I ask you something?” You inquired in a voice barely audible, and she would appear taken aback by your question, before nodding hastily, and smiling reassuringly over at you whilst her heart skipped a beat, and her eyes began to glint a little in response to your voice, no matter how small it was, the way it sounded right now, you fighting to stay awake for her the way that you were, and knew you always would.

“Of course,” she cooed, “you can ask me anything, Y/n.”

“D-Do you think it’s sexy, at all, m-me being associated with the whole Skin-eater thing?” You asked, and you would then wince, realising you probably sounded stupid whilst Embry raised her eyebrows, and couldn’t help, but grin over at you, even after all the Apocalypse had done to her and the others; she couldn’t spite you for your father’s actions; he was the one who killed Cynthia, not you.

“Why? Do you want me to think it’s sexy?” She questioned, curious, whilst you tried to think of an answer, blood rushing up to your cheeks; she loved flustering you; seeing you blushing the way that you were now whilst you tried to find the right words to share with her in response to her previous question.

“I - I don’t know,” you stammered out a little, your voice seeming a little quieter, “I-.. never-mind, it - it was probably a stupid question, I-”

“It would be too bad, if it was,” she claimed, and you would fall quiet, your eyes widening a little whilst they locked with her’s again, “because I do think it’s kinda sexy, actually - you’re my little earth-wrecker.”

“Little?” You pointed out in a soft whine, prompting her to smirk over at you whilst she tried to fight back a giggle, before nodding, and tilting her head partially whilst both your and her breathing patterns seemed to accelerate alongside your hearts.

“What? You’re kinda shorter than me,” she clarified, and you would raise your eyebrows, but before you could protest, she would continue, and practically make you gush even more than you already had, or were: “but I think it’s cute - m-more than cute, actually; I think it’s perfect; beautiful, even, like you - the best height difference I’ve ever seen.”

“Embry,” you whined, your voice close to a whisper again whilst it trembled a little, and she would timidly lean closer to you, the tip of her nose brushing against your’s in the best way possible, “can - can I-?”

You then glanced down at her lips, the words getting stuck in your throat; you still were afraid of doing something wrong; of scaring her away from you by treating her the way Pedro had treated you the night he raped you, but she understood as she smiled softly, and nodded, soothing you instantly as you timidly leaned even closer to her to delicately press your lips to her’s, prompting her heart to skip a beat whilst butterflies seemed to flutter around in the depths of her stomach; she’d never felt this way for anyone, before, not this intensely. Although Cynthia did seem to have a similar effect on her, her feelings were never this strong, as she slowly deepened the kiss, and lifted her right hand up to the back of your head whilst you carefully turned within her embrace to make it a more comfortable experience for her as well as you.

Eventually, you both decided to part just so you could prevent yourselves dying from a lack of oxygen, breathlessly giggling softly whilst you admired one another for a moment, just stunned by each other’s presence, and how it made each of you feel warm inside.

“So,” Embry began again timidly, whilst you were still trying to recompose yourself, “h-how are you feeling, after-? Y’know, just - in general, I guess.”

“Okay,” you managed, before shyly relocating a thin line of hair back behind your right ear, “still - surprised, I guess, that-.. y’know, you’re still here, with me, after-.. my - well, my surprise.”

“Why wouldn’t I be? Y/n, you - you know I love your surprises,” she reassured you, and you couldn’t help, but smile lovingly over at her, your heart positively soaring alongside her own, “I mean, c’mon - this is partly why I fell in love with you; you never cease to amaze me - where the heck did you come from, earlier? You were really brave, out there. Everything about you is just-” She tried not to allow a dreamy sigh to escape her lips whilst she found herself admiring your eyes again - how couldn’t she? “I love you so much,” she expressed gently, the words growing on her even more whilst a soft smile tugged at the corners of her lips again, “god, I love saying that, now, b-because - because it’s you, a-and it - it feels-.. amazing, r-real, and - and more right than anything else ever has before.”

“You-.. didn’t say the same to Cynthia?” You mused, your eyebrows furrowing a little, and Embry would falter, before wincing, and briefly averting her gaze; it didn’t surprise her to know that it would always hurt her somewhat to be reminded of Cynthia’s death, but she knew nothing would hurt her more, than losing you or Akaya would.

“Sure, I - I did, but-.. it never-..” She drew in a barely audible sharp breath, whilst you began to feel bad for bringing her up again; you hated hurting Embry the way you could tell you just had, a brief moment ago, by allowing her ex-fiancé’s name to slip from your lips again. “I don’t know, I guess it just never really stuck with her,” she stated, though it made her feel worse to claim that it didn’t, when it did, almost as much as it was with you, “n-not as much as-.. as it does when I say it to you.”

You faltered, noticing that she was trying not to cry again, making your heart ache excruciatingly alongside her own as you lifted your right hand up to her left cheek, prompting her heart to skip a beat whilst she tried not to break down in front of you; tried to stay strong for you, somehow, as she didn’t want to hurt you by crying again over Cynthia’s death, though it had been a little while, now, since such an event had occurred.

“Ember-”

“You own my heart, Y/n,” she expressed, and you would fall quiet for a moment, your eyes glinting again, and breath catching in your throat - how could something feel so beautiful as her words just did? “You’re the only person who I could ever want to make forever memories with,” she added delicately, “you know that, right?”

“O-Of course I do,” you answered, trying not to hesitate; you still doubted sometimes that you were enough for her, prompting your heart to sink a little; it just hurt, so much, to think that - if you’d stopped your father’s operation with the Skin-eaters - she would have been able to be, and spend the rest of her life, with Cynthia, instead of someone like you, “a-and you know that I could only ever want that with you, too, right?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” She replied, and you would express relief, glad that she did, because making her happy, and spending the rest of your life as well as eternity with her was all you’d ever wanted to do ever since you’d first met, and fallen deeply in love with her outside of the walls of the base.

“Good, I-.. I just wanted to make sure,” you explained, and she would nod slowly, before tangling her fingers within your hair again; she’d asked for the same reason, not wanting you to think that - if she could - she would choose to go wherever Cynthia was, instead of you, because - though she had been fond of Cynthia, she felt different with you, like she had been made for you, somehow; made to spend her life and eternity with you, as if you were soulmates even during times like these, with the Skin-eaters and rival gangs creating havoc beyond the walls of the Survivors’ base you were both currently situated within.

“So - w-what do you wanna do? You’re probably tired, right?” She guessed, and you would nod, begrudgingly, just because you were, until you felt bad for doing so; you just wished you could stay awake with her forever, somehow.

“A little, I guess,” you answered, and she would frown, before nodding gravely, before wrapping her arms around your waist again, “but-.. before-.. before I go to sleep, I have one request.”

“Sure,” she replied, curious to hear what it might be as she peacefully connected her forehead to your’s again, and admired your eyes whilst you tried to find the courage to muster up what you wanted to do again, “what is it?”

“C-Can you - Can you give me just - just one more kiss, before-?” You managed in a small voice, and she couldn’t help, but smirk again upon noticing that you had begun to blush all over again in response to the look on her face, as well as what you were asking her to do.

“What, like - like this?” She jokingly pressed a delicate kiss to your left cheek, prompting your heart to skip a beat whilst your lips made the shape of an ‘oh’, leaving you breathless for a moment whilst you revelled in how it felt to have her kissing your cheek the way she just had.

“Well, n-no, but - that was nice,” you murmured a little exasperatedly whilst she couldn’t help, but grin over at you, a giggle longing to escape her lips again; you were just so adorable when you were flustered the way that you were, now, prompting her to develop an urge to fluster you even more, somehow, as she thought about kissing the tip of your nose, something that had also flustered you before whenever she’d found herself subconsciously doing it to tease you, somehow, “b-basically, I - I meant - your lips, a-against mine, a-and then boom - kiss, y-y’know?”

She would raise her eyebrows, as if what you were asking her was confusing her somehow as you winced, and rubbed at the back of your neck to try and recompose yourself somehow, but the pounding of your heart wouldn’t stop, and she was determined to make you blush even more profusely than you were, now, somehow.

“Oh, I see what you mean, now,” she claimed, before acting as if she were about to connect her lips to your own, only to divert the last second by relocating the kiss to the tip of your nose, again leaving you speechless as well as breathless whilst you tried to recompose yourself again, feeling warm and fuzzy inside whilst your heart pounded even more overwhelmingly, somehow, as if it were determined to break through your rib-cage, and jump into her arms just to be closer to her own heart, something it had been longing to do ever since you first met, and fell in love with her the very second your gaze had fallen blissfully upon her in the best way possible, leaving you feeling hopeless, until she picked you up, and carried you hastily back toward the base to get you treated before she and the others could lose you to the Skin-eaters beyond the base walls. “Like that?” She asked, and you would wince, before trying to muster up a response again, but it was like your words were just getting stuck within your throat again, never to be heard as long as she kept on teasing you the way that she currently was. “Did I do it right, or-?” She pried, only flustering you even more, and - success, she could tell your cheeks were getting redder by the minute, prompting her heart to skip a beat whilst she subconsciously gushed internally again, revelling over the effect she had on you, and how adorable it made you look, something she still couldn’t believe to be possible as - even without her teasing - you were adorable, whatever mood you were in, so how the heck could she make you even more adorable by flustering you the way that she currently was, and seemed to every time you both found yourselves together, blissfully within each others arms, the way that you were, now, or even just whenever you both were in the same room. That was another thing; she was glad that she and you were no longer a secret, as it had been painful to not be able to kiss, or even cradle you close to her whenever she needed your warmth (the way she often did, every day, or was it - even - every second? At least preferably, though she knew that - sadly - it wouldn’t be possible for her and you to spend your lives as well as eternity within each other’s arms, especially not during times like these).

“Y-You’re teasing me again, aren’t you?” You managed in a voice close to a whisper, and she would try and appear none-the-wiser, though it was hard to hide the smirk that kept on trying to tug at her lips again.

“No?” She tried to claim, but you could tell - just by looking into her eyes, and the tone of her voice - that she was playing with you just to try and make you blush the way she liked to whenever you both were together, like this.

“Not fair,” you whined, and she couldn’t help it now as she grinned over at you sheepishly, her eyes glinting whilst a soft giggle slipped from her lips; it was overdue, her reaction, she knew that, especially after she’d messed up trying to hide that she was, in fact, intentionally just teasing you the way she had been a brief moment ago, now, “stop making me blush, Ember!”

“Never,” she remarked, and you would pout a little, before playfully punching her left shoulder, only making her giggle even more uncontrollably whilst you began to grin alongside her, amused by her reaction to your own response to her teasing you, clearly, “I love seeing you blush - you know I do-”

“Well, guess what? I love seeing you blush,” you corroborated, before leaning forward to press a kiss to her own cheek, before you also did her the favour of placing another on her own nose, flustering her as she appeared taken aback by your actions, but before you could do another, she couldn’t help, but lean forward, and delicately press a kiss to your lips, and you wouldn’t hesitate to melt into it, smiling softly against them, until she held you at arm’s length, and - in the sincerest voice you’d ever heard - she whispered another gentle ‘I love you’, making your heart skip a beat, and - before you even knew it, you were saying it back, before adding, between another soft kiss, the additional four words: ‘and I always will.’

🜸🜚🜸

As soon as you’d healed up relatively fully, and Claire had removed your bandages, you’d decided you should answer all of Embry’s questions, before you both agreed to officially get engaged, and once you’d told her everything you knew about the Skin-eaters doubling up the way they could, she slid the ring her mother had given her off of her finger, to instead slide it upon your wedding one to really make things official, as much as she possibly could, even during times like these. You then found yourselves gradually deciding you should progress your relationship, though you still felt nervous after what Pedro had done to you, even though you knew Embry could never hurt you the way he had that night.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this right now,” you mused subconsciously, whilst Embry was hovering above you carefully, her right hand drawing circles on your back beneath your vest; you were trying to stay calm to the best of your ability, but it was hard when all you could think about during this moment in time was Pedro raping you the way he did.

“Do you want me to stop? We don’t have to do this, baby, I promise,” she cooed, her eyes full of the concern she was holding for you; she was terrified of hurting you, somehow; terrified of knowing that she could lose you, if she did something wrong, or too quickly. She drew in a faint and sharp breath, barely audible; she didn’t want you to see that she was just as nervous as you were, wanting you to know that she was there for you; staying strong to prove to you that she could take care of you, and wouldn’t hurt you the way Pedro did not too long ago, now. “We could do something else? L-Like, read together, o-or just-”

“No,” you interjected timidly, “I - I just-.. I want to do this, Ember, I-..” You locked eyes with her again, trying to appear more confident than you had been, before. “I want you,” you stated, your voice close to a whisper, and she would raise her eyebrows, your words sending a shiver through her for a moment, before she affectionately connected her forehead to your’s.

“I want you, too,” she returned a little exasperatedly, your hearts pounding together, and breathing pattern becoming staggered and uneven whilst it accelerated at the same time, “Y/n, I - I’ve always wanted you, e-ever since I first-.. Do you trust me, baby?”

She fell quiet, appearing a little embarrassed as she averted her gaze, prompting you to smirk over at her after you’d briefly appeared surprised in response to her revelation - had she always been secretly fantasising about you, or-? ‘Cause you knew you always had, her, even after Pedro had violated you, surprisingly enough; the traumatic memory he’d created for you hadn’t affected the dreams you’d been having about her, but then again, you couldn’t think of anything else that ever could.

“Why wouldn’t I? I - I’m just - I’m glad, b-because I’ve always wanted you, too,” you admitted shyly, relieving her as she glanced up at you again, her eyes widening, “t-there was never a day that I didn’t think of-.. think of you, a-and all I wanted to do with you; e-everything I wanted to tell you, a-and-.. all I wanted to see with you, and always will, no matter what. I just - I want everything with you, Ember, including this - I-.. I love you, s-so much, a-and I trust you, I promise.”

“Good,” she cooed, “b-because I could never hurt you, you know that, right?”

“Of course,” you answered, “b-baby, I - I know you.”

“G-Good,” she returned, “I just - I wanted to make sure, before we-..” She cleared her throat, before timidly smiling lovingly over at you, her eyes glinting over at you whilst you warily smiled back at her, and then lifted your right hand up to her left cheek, prompting her to instantly melt into your touch whilst she wondered where you both should begin, until you glanced down at her lips, and she knew exactly what you wanted her to do.

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed it! ❤️

[harmonyvarnes]

Baby Girl ~ Isman x Female! Oc ( Song Of Crimson Nile/ Romance Club ) Sequel to my woman ( Part 3 )

Part 2 ------>

title - Baby Girl ( Isman x Female original character )

Fandom: Song Of Crimson Nile

Summary: After learning they will leave for thebes, harmony must prepare for the worst... But first, there is something she must tell Isman.

Warning: Mention of sexual content. Mention of pregnancy, etc.

Pairings: Isman x Fem!Oc, Ramesses x Eva, Dia x ???.

As a few days went by, Eva told their mentor Remmao about Dia leaving late at night. Harmony went rigid, if Eva knew Her and Isman were sneaking out late at night as well, it would end badly for everyone.

To be honest, Harmony did not like Dia at all.

The girl was a liability.

And she didn't trust her at all.

Eva was more of a friend to her.

She could remember the look Dia gave Eva. It took everything in her to not laugh.

After their lesson, Harmony, Dia and Eva went to take a bath. Right now she had a towel wrapped around her lower body with her long hair covering her hair.

She begin to apply milk and lavender to her body, Eva and Dia we're using different method for their bodies.

Lavender helps soothe the body and nerves.

She washed her face and listened as Dia and Eva talked. Something about Dia's past, someone she loved.

Ex.

Harmony didn't give them any mind, she rinsed all the liquid off her body, grabbed a towel, and wrapped it around her top.

She got out of the bathtub.

A few minutes later Dia and Eva followed behind her.

It was like she was the ring leader.

A smile spread across her face.

Maybe she was.

[~]

As the afternoon came, Harmony was on edge this was her first Necromancy / Oneiromancy trip. To say she was nervous, all the nerve in her body was rocking through her skin.

She took a deep breath and placed her hair in two long ponytail braids and put on her black cloak.

She placed her mask on, and it transformed. Now she was unrecognizable. No one would know it was her.

She met up with Eva.

The young woman was nervous, but they agreed with each other and met up with a woman named, Theonoe.

She held a jug of beer in her hand. Harmony snatched it from her and placed it in her bag.

No, just no.

The woman was nervous around them both.

Because their earlier conversation didn't end well.

< Earlier that day >

Eva and Harmony were looking out at the water, lost in thoughts just thinking about what would happen in the next few days.

That's when they heard footsteps.

Quickly they sat on their silk and faked a smile.

“ Oh, sorry. I was looking for lizard, I'm hunting them”.

The woman looked at them both with curious and different facial expressions. Harmony did not buy it.

She narrowed her eyes. “ Go on, we are not in your way”. The woman steps forward.

“ I'm sorry. You two are Shesmu aren't you?.”

Eva's nervousness went out of the soul of her body, while Harmony was ready to throw hands.

“ What a silly question. -” Eva started.

“ No” Harmony finished glaring at the woman.

“ Please! I'll pay you both more coins. Just make it stop”.

Both Harmony and Eva looked at each other. “ No, go bother someone else. Go use another Shesmu”.

They begin to walk away.

But the woman stopped them. She grabbed Eva by the arm and didn't let go. Harmony was furious, how dare the bitch grab her friend like that?.

She reached forward and snatched the woman's hair. “ Let.Her.Go....Now!” she snarled.

The woman let go.

“ Please, I just want you two help.”

They stopped to listen to her story, she was young and thought she was in love. But it was clearly passion and lust, not love.

They both agreed, but she would pay them extra.

After the woman left, both Eva and Harmony looked at each other.

Ohh, this was going to be hard.

Their work outfit was damaged from throwing it in the water.

They had work to do.

[ Time Skip ]

After successfully removing the energy from Theonoe, Both Eva and Harmony were about to walk back to their home.

But Harmony thought of something and told Eva she'll meet her later. She had something to do first. Hopefully it goes well and Eva doesn't get caught by the Epistates and his crew.

After making sure Eva got home safety, she ran into Amen and she had to lie her way of it, but this time Amen didn't believe her.

He told her he would take her with him, rather she liked it or not.

Harmony was sad, now her friend would leave her. Who would she talk to now?.

She wiped away a tear, she didn't know she was crying. Taking a deep breath, she decided to meet up with her boyfriend at their usual spot.

No one would come and no one knew this place exist.

After a few minutes, Isman came out of the tall plants. He smiled when he saw her and opened his arms for her.

“ Come here” he cooed.

Harmony didn't hesitate, she walked over to him and embraced him.

The two hug for a while, both showering each other with kisses, love and affection.

After a while Isman sat her down on a log and the two engage in a series conversation.

“ So I'm going to Thebes with the hunters ” he started.

Harmony was shocked, but before she could proceed it all in, her mouth moved before she could take it all in.

“ Oh, not you too”.

Isman looked at her with a confused facial expression. “ Hmm?”.

“ There's something I need to tell you, Isman” her words came out slowly.

Around them, there was the sound of the wind howling and bushes moving in the distance.

“ What is it love?” Isman asked, moving hair from her face.

Harmony bit her lip and took a deep breath, it was now or never. “ There are multiple things I need to tell you, but please believe me. You have to”.

Her boyfriend cooed and pulled her close, he tucked her head under his neck and kissed her forehead softly. “ I'm here tell me”.

She braced herself, it was time.

“ Well it started”....

[~]

The next morning Harmony was not dealing up to dealing with Remmao. It was the same thing every day, he taught them, one of them did something and at the end of the day they got scowled and repeated.

This particular morning would be different they would be leaving for Thebes.

And to say she was nervous.

What if something goes wrong?.

She was with child, she couldn't let anything happen to her family.

She placed her hand on her stomach and took a deep breath, she could do this.

This was what she was here for, this was her job.

She was the key to the future.

Standing to her feet, she placed her hand on her stomach and whispered a spell.

And it was done.

Harmony walked out of the room and down the corridors.

She walks until she nearly bumps into Ramesses. “ Hi,” he said cheerfully.

She blinked, what had gotten him in a good mood?.

“ Hi to yourself.”

He linked his arms with her and took her out of the room.

* * *

Just as they were about to leave, Milo came running at her, Harmony petted his ears as the dog licked her hand.

“ Who's a good boy?” she asked, the dog tail wagged more.

“ Woof” the dog barked.

She then moved back and the dog ran off, looking ahead she made eye contact with Isman.

He smiled, winked, and helped his dog inside.

Looking away, last night conversation was stuck in her mind.

Would she make it out alive?

With a sigh.

Harmony placed her items on the trolley and got inside the chariot.

No one was near her, so she was good.

But not before long.

Evthys came in with Dia.

Both females smiled at her and she returned a smile.

Oh, Anubis.

This was going to be a long ride.

[~]

To Be Continued.

[aahsokaatano]

hi. took ur survey, saw ur offerign drabbles. please don't stress urself but if u wanna - i'd love a drubble about any two artists/actors/political figures/famous ip characters (liek sherlock holmes etc, basically, anyone who is in the mainstream culture and known by general public) kicking each other asses in battlebots tournament. cheers

I had to sit on this for a few days before it finally came together, but here it is! I hope you enjoy, this is one of the strangest things I've ever written and I have no regrets lmao

also, uh, I know basically nothing about battlebots, so apologies for any inaccuracies

"I am going to destroy that jerk," he hissed, glaring across the ring at his biggest competitor.

"Calm down, Thomas," Abe rolled his eyes. "We're here to have fun, remember?"

"I am having fun!" he insisted. "And I'll have even more fun when I win, okay?"

"You would have thought that we learned our lesson last year and kicked him off the team," George sighed.

"He's the best at filling out the liability and insurance forms," Abe shrugged.

"And I think he's right!" Teddy jumped in. "It's a battle, where's your bloodlust?"

"Shouldn't it be oil-lust? The bots don't have blood."

"Shut up, George."

"UP NEXT," the announcer crowed over the shouts from the crowd. "FREEDOM FIGHTER, FROM TEAM RUSHMORE, VERSUS HONEYPOT, FROM TEAM HUNDRED ACRE!"

Thomas gave a manic grin, holding up the controller for their bot as the crowd cheered. On the other side of the ring, Winnie did the same.

The bots were released into the fighting space. Freedom Fighter was a tiny tank with a large pincer on the front, perfect for grabbing enemy bots. Honeypot, on the other hand, was almost a perfect sphere sitting atop its treads.

"BEGIN!"

Thomas sent Freedom Fighter hurtling forwards, pincer snapping menacingly, while Winnie held Honeypot where it was.

"Oh, this isn't going to be good, is it?" George sighed.

"Probably not," Abe shook his head.

Just as Thomas was about to close the pincers around Honeypot, several spikes shot out of the sides, digging into the pincer and preventing it from closing. Before Freedom Fighter could back up, an electrical current flowed out from the spikes, frying the circuits and leaving Freedom Fighter effectively dead.

Thomas dropped the controller with a curse, and Honeypot proceeded to roll over Freedom Fighter and take a victory lap around the ring.

"HONEYPOT FROM TEAM HUNDRED ACRE WINS!"

"I hate them all," Thomas snarled.

"We know," George shook his head, exchanging a look with Abe as Teddy patted Thomas's shoulder.

Across the ring, they watched as a tiger, a pig, and a kangaroo all celebrated wildly with the bear who had piloted their bot to victory.

[captainjimothy]

i think it's important to remember that kira grew up under the occupation, that she is still operating under the occupation in her mind, especially in the early seasons, that she experienced her family being torn apart and watched the same happen to so many others. having a family is a liability, to yourself and to them, and yet--life is all we have, life is hope, new life is hope is resistance is strength. but as a fighter, her priorities have always been to keep herself in top fighting form. and it's simpler not to have a family anyway.

learning how to live in peace time. forming complicated relationships with federation coworkers on a station thick with the ghosts of your own people, people who died instead of you. it's still not practical to start a family (and when is it ever?), but you're dating, you're trying to act like a normal person and not like a soldier. sometimes it feels like you still have to be a soldier, like maybe you'll never stop, like you're cursed to live in war forever. you're doing long distance with someone who should understand all of these things but he doesn't, there's some fundamental disconnect that wasn't there before, but you chalk it up to the distance and try to focus on your friends and maybe his/your life will settle down and you'll find your groove again.

you accept the baby because there are no other options. because if you don't, the baby will die. because keiko is your friend and she's nearly dead already and you can't let her wake up to the loss of her child. so you take the baby. everything changes, and somehow nothing changes. you're still you, though your body is strange and people look at you with a peculiar fond pity instead of the usual respect or lust or fear. but it's fine, even if you feel like you are hardly living in your body at all anymore, you have your friends--more than that, you have a new family that you didn't realize you were signing up for. but you love them. you can't help it. it feels wrong, it feels normal when you're alone but when you're around them it feels like your skin is falling off and your spirit is hovering about two feet behind you. maybe this is just what it's like to be pregnant. the only person who doesn't have this effect on you is molly.

after the baby is born, everything changes again, and it does not stop changing for even five minutes at a time. you stop dating for a while. you're still not sure whether your new family actually wants you to be part of them, you still feel that clawing shame of Difference at their dinner table. maybe it was more than the pregnancy. there's a war on again, you don't have time for this--it's never been practical to have a family, let alone have personal crises. you detach yourself less carefully than is perhaps polite, and ignore the regret.

you fall in love. no, that's not true. you start dating your best friend, who is in love with you, and you're happy because it's a much simpler thing to do than having someone else's baby. you do love odo, but it is not the way he loves you, but you can't say that to someone who is dying, so you don't. you convince yourself that your feelings are enough, and for a while, they are. he's your best friend, after all. you do love him. when he leaves, you grieve his absence, and hate yourself for feeling relieved.

there is only empty space, now, where your family used to be. there is empty space where half your friends used to be. you don't want to date anymore, not for a long time. you're beginning to face the fact that there is never going to be a convenient time to have your personal crisis, so you might as well get it over with, since it seems to be a common current beneath a lot of your problems. you experiment with long hair. you bribe quark to keep his mouth shut about the holosuite program in which you play as a man. you start going to bajor for your healthcare, because you'd rather step out an airlock than talk to julian about this. some time later he asks, politely, discreetly, with those eyes that have not smiled for too long, and you can tell that he knows. so you tell him anyway.

and it's fine. it's good, actually. it's weird. you look at your body differently. you feel a little less like it's going to fall off of you, and a little more like you're really living in it. you decide to tell one or two more people, and the rest can figure it out from there. you realize you hated some things about your body, and julian--who is surprisingly fine to talk to about this, actually--says it may take a while to figure out what the feelings mean, what you actually want. some things are easy to know: you get your top surgery on bajor. some things are harder: they ask if you want to trim your belly, repair the scarring and stretching. you say you'll think about it. you don't go back.

you think about keiko. the way she looked dying, and the way she looked living again. the way she looked at you. in hindsight, she had looked at you as if you held the moon in the palm of your hand.

thinking about transmasc kira nerys again. thinking about post-partum transmasc bodies. thinking about pre-transition pregnancy and how that would inform transmasc!kira's relationship to his body. thinking about grief and love and patience and love. thinking about how kira must have felt about parenthood before the pregnancy, and how that perspective must have changed.

[amlovelies]

somewhere between hope and pride

written for @wayhavenmonthly​‘s Fall for Unit Bravo

Day 18: Harvest

Pairing: Mason/F!oc (Serena Willis)

rating: M- strong language, sexual conversations and mention of alcohol and cigarettes

words: 1.7k

read on ao3

A/N this is another piece of my canon divergent as of yet untitled AU. 

               It’s exactly the sort of event I would have done anything to avoid back home. The community center is decorated with pumpkins, gourds, and leaves in the warm tones of fall. The last event of the annual harvest festival, the silent auction, is apparently the height of Wayhaven’s autumnal social calendar. Mayor Friedman had specially requested Unit Bravo’s presence. I’d considered telling Agent Greene that since I was not technically an agent that I must not be included in that mandate in order to escape attending.

               However, after weeks of what amounted to house arrest, I was more than happy for an opportunity to get out an about. We still had been unable to locate the party behind the bounty on Dinah. Without any real reason to leave the premises, I’d spent most of my days in the library, watching movies with Farah, and avoiding Mason.

               It’s been a little over two weeks since I ended things. That sounds like there was something to end. It’s been two weeks since I stopped hooking up with him, and it’s sucked. As much as I may know that I was making the right choice to protect myself, I miss spending time with him both in and out of the bedroom. But that was the whole reason why I had to stop it. My dumbass had caught feelings. If it was just fun then I wouldn’t miss him. Mason doesn’t do feelings.

               For all my grumbling, the event hasn’t been terrible. Nate and Farah are off going through the silent auction offerings. Adam has been dragged off to speak with the mayor and Agent Greene leaving Dinah, myself and Mason alone at our table.

               I’m nursing another glass of red wine and even without super senses I can hear the pretty brunette at the table behind us trying to work up the nerve to approach the brooding vampire sitting a few seats to my right. I have to remind myself that he was never mine to lose before I get too bitter.

               I steal a glance to see if he’s noticed, to see if I need to really start drinking in earnest.  I’ve never seen him in a button up before. It’s black and I can still see the chord of his crystal necklace poking out from where the last few buttons are undone. His hair is pulled back in a low ponytail with only a few strands falling out around his face. He looks sharp and devilishly handsome. As I look up, I find that his eyes are already on me. His brow is furrowed, but it smooths as he noticed me looking at him. I wonder how long he has been watching me, if he’s noticed how agitated I’ve become. I hope not.

               For once he looks away first. Without a word, he rises from the table and I notice him reaching for the pocket he always keeps his smokes in as he heads for the hallway. I surprised he is even bothering to leave; he usual lights up wherever he wants to, rules be damned. Maybe he needs a break from the overstimulation of the room. There are a lot of people here and it must be wreaking havoc on his nerves.

               “Well, that was interesting,” Dinah says off to my left.

               “Huh? What was interesting?” I ask as I turn to her.

               “I take it you still haven’t talked to him.”

               “There’s nothing to talk about.” I don’t want to have this argument again. She seems determined to try and make us out to be some great romance. Not everyone gets what she and Nate have.

               “How will you know if you don’t try?” she asks her voice soft as she places a soothing hand on my arm.

               I resist the urge to shake the hand off. I know she is trying to be helpful, and I don’t want to lash out at her. I’m just getting so tired of people encouraging me to do something I know will only hurt me. “Mason made it clear from the beginning that it was just fun. I don’t have a right to try and change the terms halfway through just because I’m stupid and caught feelings.”

               I already know how that conversation would go. At least this way my pride can stay intact.

               “Don’t look at me that way, Dinah. I’m fine.” I don’t want her pity. Not about this.

               She sighs and shakes her head, “and people say I’m stubborn.”

               “I’m not stubborn.” I say as I pour myself another glass of wine. “I’m just realistic.”

               We lapse into silence as I sip at the wine. After a minute or two, Nate slides into his seat next to Dinah. I’m thankful that they can keep each other company and just leave me to my wine.

               I hear a chair slide back from the table behind me, and watch as the brunette walks past me to the quieted cheers of her friends. Mason has reentered the hall, and apparently, she has finally found the nerve to make her move. She’s cute. Her low-cut dress much more flattering than the prim professional number I had borrowed from Dinah. I’m sure Mason will find her appealing enough. I knew he would find new people to take to bed; I just didn’t think I would be in the room when it happened.

               I see her reach out and place a hand on his arm. He hasn’t brushed her off and she hasn’t been scared off by his rudeness. I can’t do this. I want to leave, but they’re too close to the hallway. I glance around and see a smaller exit at the back.

               Adam will probably have my head, but I’d rather risk getting kidnapped than start crying in front of everyone here. In front of him.

               I think I hear Nate say my name as I go to leave, but I don’t turn around. I can feel tears welling up in my eyes and I need to get out now.

               The door leads to a small set of stairs. I’m alone. I walk to the edge of the landing and grab the metal railing for support. It’s freezing. Drawing in a deep breath I focus on the cold. I have no one to blame, but myself. I hate that I can feel tears escaping down my cheeks. Stupid, stupid Serena.

               At the sound of the door opening, I turn. I do my best to wipe away any trace of the tears before who ever it is can see.              

               Fuck. Why did it have to be him?

               “Though you were supposed to stay inside?” Mason growls at me as the door closes behind him leaving us alone on the stairs.

               “Well we both know that I don’t always follow the rules.” I say trying to be my usual snarky self.

               “You don’t have to babysit me.” I continue.  “I’d hate to ruin your fun.” It comes out with more bitterness than I meant.

               He looks confused for a moment, “oh that” he shrugs.

               “Yeah, so like I said, you don’t have to babysit me. I’ll go back inside in a minute. Go get your dick wet or whatever.” I cross my arms across my chest and roll my eyes. I’m shooting for nonchalance and indifferent, but I don’t know if I managed it.

               He looks at the door for a moment before looking back at me. “I don’t think I will.”

               “What, why not? She’s cute and seems into you. Isn’t that all you need?”

               He leans back against the wall and with a smirk says, “only one I want to have fun with here is you, Sweetheart.”

               I feel like all the air has been pulled out of my lungs. He’s a tempting vision and my body responds to the familiar pattern of banter. If it was only that it would be one thing, but there’s a flicker in my chest of something that feels suspiciously like hope. A vain hope that he means more with those words. That he means I’m the only one he wants beyond tonight.  

               “Too bad, because I’m not interested.”

               “you’re lying” he accuses me with narrowed eyes.

               “Is your ego really that fragile that you can’t handle a rejection.” I say with a scoff.

               He rolls his eyes. “I know you and you’re lying.” He smirks, “remember, your body gives you away.”

               Stupid vampire super senses.

               “Why do you care, Mason? We both know you were going to get bored sooner or later.” I turn away so he can’t see my eyes anymore. I can’t do anything about my heartrate, but I can get rid of at least one source of information.

               “Would I? I’m not bored yet.” I can’t tell if he’s asking me or if he’s asking himself. I feel him move closer so that he’s standing directly behind me. His hand ghost over my arm, not actually touching it. “I thought we were both having fun. I don’t see why it needs to stop.”

               “God damn it don’t make me say it!” I yell. I had hoped he would just let it go.

               “Heaven forbid I make you do something you don’t want to do, Sweetheart.” He says in a biting tone.

               “It wasn’t just fun for me.” I admit as I turn around to face him. “It was beginning to mean something to me, and I wanted it to mean something to you, but it doesn’t work that way for you.”

               There it is. Fuck my pride, I guess.

               “What if it did mean something?” he asks.

               My chest tightens as the little spark of hope flares within it, “Does it?”

               He closes the inches between us and kisses me. I don’t know if it’s an answer or a test, but at that moment I don’t care. His hands move to my hips and pull us flush together. God, I’ve missed this. My whole body feels like it ignites at his touch. Would it really be so terrible to believe in this? To believe he cares for me?

               This kiss breaks and I whisper, “I think I love you.”

               His hands drop from my hips as if he’d been burned.

               I nod and swallow all the emotions I’ll have to deal with later, “that’s what I thought.”

               I don’t give him a chance to respond before I’m through the door and back to the event.

               Stupid, stupid Serena. You knew how this would end.

tagging: @lord-king-saint, @morgans-ass-freckles, @agentnatesewell, @lilyoffandoms, @softforf and @bellarxse (If you would like to be tagged/not tagged/only tagged for certain pairings please let me know 💜)

[cammys-imagines24]

•Being in a Relationship with Desire•

It should come as no surprise that being with Desire is a handful.

What with their constant scheming and "up to no good" state of being.

They're the type to start filling you in on their devious, naughty plans over morning coffee and not stop until well into cocktail hour.

You knew what you signed up for though and it does please you how willingly they are to share every part of their ideas with you.

And they do fully. They will never lie to you or keep you out of the loop. You're their partner, in every way. From partner in life to partner in crime.

Can you imagine having Desire's full attention upon you? What it feels like to receive true, everlasting love from the anthropomorphic personification of desire?

They embody lust, craving, wanting and attraction so to have all those bewitching traits focused on you is like being put under a spell.

When Desire feels love and lust towards you, which is honestly all they feel besides a dash of trickery, it is an overwhelming experience.

There have been many times where a simple kiss from them brings you to your knees or a mere golden eyed glance has made you nearly faint.

Their voice makes your heart beat nearly out of your chest, their body makes you tremble and brings you the greatest form of pleasure anyone could ever know.

They are entirely devoted to you. At your beck and call. Making it their personal goal to get you anything and everything you could possibly desire.

You are spoiled rotten by them. They even created new rooms and places in the Threshold to suit your tastes, your fancies, your hobbies, etc.

They keep you close to them at all times and when you're within reach, they will be touching you in some way or another.

Softly running their manicured fingers through your hair, absently tracing any bare skin you may be showing, leaving little pecks here and there on your cheeks and neck, if only to mark you with their lipstick.

They like you on their lap, your body touching theirs so that they may see and feel the constant effect they have upon you.

So they can bear witness to the rhythm of your heart, the warmth of your skin, the color of your blush...

They are utterly faithful to you and attentive, knowing your wants and desires even before the thought occurs to you.

They are extremely protective, going as far as to not let you out of their sight unless absolutely necessary.

See, they know that because of how they interfere in their siblings lives that they are not popular amongst the Endless and should the others seek revenge, they know all too well how you are a liability.

Their eternal love for you could make you a target and they will not stand to have you be put in danger.

They will take you anywhere you want to go, in their realm, in the human world, in the universe so long as they are there beside you.

To have Desire's love feels like a never ending enchantment and the "honeymoon phase" never leaves.

Your days are filled with luxury, pleasure and allure.

It almost feels like a trance but with a life this good you hope never to awaken from this magic.

To have won Desire's heart is no mean feat and yet they have given it to you, figuratively and literally.

They are yours and you are forever and ever theirs.