#lunch lady Belinda

[sailoreddy]

[oyaapeach]

im watching dimension 20 and i keep calling lunch lady doreen lunch lady belinda (from mpgis)

[goblinbabe666]

“i’ve had a few miscarriages myself, before yknow” “yeah i can fuckin tell” THIS WHOLE SERIES IS GOLD.

[esparia]

The Saison Margeurite Puzzle

I have a lot of thoughts about MPGIS (most popular girls in school) but Saison is one that after S5 I have crafted a theory for. Or at least an explanation to the best of my vague ability. ( @ifrickupmywords I tried to condense it but...)

The Main Questions I'm trying to answer:

Pretends she’s French when she’s Canadian. Why?

A.) Could be master manipulator, points are showing this.

B.) Could be trolling, evidence doesn’t fully back this but it could have started as such.

C.) Could be a power trip. She obviously likes fucking with people but this point could go to either A or B.

Why France?

A.) Greater popularity points to be an exchange student than a “new student”.

B.) Being French would be easier to fake if she already knew French bc she’s from Montreal and grew up in Quebec which has a close tie to French as a language.

Why not Canadian?

A.) Doesn’t score cool points. Not an exchange if she just moved. Lacks “cool” accent and experiences.

B.) Could be past related. Past unknown.

Thus, Popularity Aim Theory.

If she’s aiming to be popular why the route she’s taking? It seems convoluted and uncertain.

What she has done so far is make her position un-topple-able by not staking her popularity on what she is but herself. So here's the timeline of events.

Starting point. “French Student”, grabs everyone’s attention immediately. Gets interest from the social hubs and is thus introduced to many of their connections bc she needs to be “shown around”. Is thus labeled a non threat to their hierarchy and they will only help her instead of try to pull her down from her “fumbling climb up the social ladder”.

Taking French as a class. Perhaps she “misunderstood” what French was, just like how English is, as a class. It would give her an easy passing grade and raise her GPA. Some classes give the opportunity to have a France trip (when that opportunity falls through she joins the French club which gets her that trip)

Her introduction. A “Good but Confused Student”. Goes to the “wrong” class but is earnest and obviously just turned around and is directed back by a teacher and likely got a tardy pass so she could make it to her other class and get her book and still make it in time. Endears her to the staff. They are likelier to be softer on her bc of it. (added bonus, she gains Blaine)

Blaine is a football player. Perfect for a least a romp which would earn her points with him an gain his ear. A connection to the male side of the popularity royalty would gain elevate her but he proves beyond perfect.

-Blain is naive and bc of that easily lied to. Anything odd she can pass of as her being “French” and not understanding. He’d believe her. He’d also tell her what he hears readily enough if she is his girlfriend and prom date.

Prom is easy to get into bc of Blaine and she is sure to be featured in at least the yearbook’s prom section bc of Blaine’s football status. Everyone will see her with him there and those not at prom will see her as the gf of a football player. Status instantly on par with the cheerleaders.

Baby Brittany. Saison is not stupid and would use protection if she wanted to avoid a baby. However I believe Lunch Lady Belinda got her thinking with her comment “the babies you two make tonight are going to be so stupid”. What gets the whole school talking about you, class and status regardless? A pregnant girl. Add in that she is the exchange student, the gf of Blaine, and kind but dumb? Everyone will want to support her. Again, she is zero threat.

Flashing forward she names Brittany after the one person who is most vocal against her. Making her a god parent. Tying the cheer squad to her and neutralizing or at least making peace with an actual threat. BUT only announces it after the stage is set.

She, whether planned or not, takes her pregnancy and uses it to it’s full potential. She’s amazing at grabbing opportunities when she gets them. Sure fire way to get the school to know she’s pregnant? Leaving the tests behind instead of hiding them. We know theres more than one bc Desmond (the janitor) says “and people be leaving these (positive pregnancy test) all over the gd floor” implying more than one all over the place. Someone and likely more than one will find them the rumor mill will start and speculation will rise. Thus building it up to a bigger reveal. Mackenzie was going to spread it around and ridicule whoever it was when she found out. (the confrontation between the squad and her is very interesting if you think about it)

But that’s not enough for the long haul. She needs a support system that can’t be rocked. She needs to cement her position thus “Babes having Babies”, it falls through but it connects her to Brittany for a while and its shown she already has a connection with Shay “practically royalty”. The whole school is basically beneath her now that she has a reality show and wants the influence she has. Even Brittany. It falls through yes but it’s what she wants. If the nation sees it it’s likelier for her parents to see or someone to recognize her and fake claim her. It cancelling is perfect bc it served her purpose and she can move on.

She has grown her connections and anything added is a cake walk. Her school image of being really tolerant of Brittany’s hostility also cemented the illusion of a “friendly and forgiving” nature. Again lowering her threat level and being welcomed by just about everyone.

Being added then removed from the cheer squad was pretty solid strategy wise. She got in for Cheer Nationals, a place she doesn’t have to act just dance and be on TV. It doesn’t have the risk of getting her fake claimed like BhB. But it guaranteed that she wouldn’t fall into obscurity. She kept part of the status boost her own reality show would have given her. She got kicked off after but that worked in her favor as it left the opening and she was known to be an ok cheer leader.

She left before it tanked on the social ladder and made connections with the outcasts (public image aiding this no doubt) and was eventually accepted back on the squad bc she used that easy opening to get onto what she knew would end up victorious. Fads come and go and she used it to build that network but she guaranteed a future when the fad died.

She does manage to keep her oblivious status or ditzy look when her water breaks in the lunch room. Either it happened really fast and she was caught unaware or she has balls of steel and timed it to deliver in the lunch room or at least start labor there. Deandra being a midwife could have thrown plans to go to the hospital out the window but she rolled with it. Either way, she rolled with it and is now legendary amongst the students.

All in all, junior year has her in a nice gray neutral zone escaping most of the drama that could tear her down. Keeping her good natured persona lets her keep all her connections and general popularity without risk now it's about maintenance. Which she does perfectly in s4. The exception is getting in the gun fight which couldn't have been foreseen at all. It does however prove the level of danger Brittany is and the importance to get her to fully believe Saison's act. Which I personally started fully suspecting because of Baby Brittany's weird ability to understand what Saison is saying. Dumb + Naive could make Genius but if Saison is brilliant enough to manipulate her surroundings to come out on top why not be able to pass it on?

Either way s5 shows how desperate she is to get Brittany off her back and neutralize that threat she poses.

That trip finally comes up and it'll either be a way to familiarize herself with France but Paris in particular to gain credit for the backstory she's fabricated and/or learn the french accent/dialect and drop the Canadian french. This is why she could have originally planed to go. (However if her parents were already in France at that time, the opportunity to show Rachel and Judith was there which would get back to Brittany eventually.)

She could also use it to “visit” her parents. Not inviting Blaine along with the excuse that it was a club activity. Speculation about how deep her knowledge and strings go it could be a complete spider web of strings she's pulling or she could simply be reacting to circumstances and taking advantage of it.

I fully believe she knew that Rachel and Judith followed her around and likely was testing that exactly bc she knew Brittany's tendency to... go to extremes. She just got confirmation at the drunken party about the Brittany bit. This is when I think she for sure made plans to show off her parents. That laugh and confidence just scream security.

The reveal doesn't exactly add much to it but it does show how she flips between to states relatively easily. In the end Brittany “came around” and with her in her corner there's little to no way her position will be shakable.

[rebuke-me]

so i was listening to the first two episodes of fantasy high while painting a garage yesterday bc I needed entertainment. but bc my phone was in my pocket, I couldn't see any of the character art. which meant that I was making up what they looked like in my mind (I knew what the leads looked like, at least vaguely, so those were all close to canon.)

however. I never saw what lunch lady doreen looked like.

so the whole time I was just imagining lunch lady belinda from most popular girls in school.

[themostpopulargreasersintulsa]

[the-aqua-fangirl]

Honestly I’ve had this idea stuck in my when I started watching Most Popular Girls in School not long ago.

I finally did it.

[mpgis-moments]

[incorrect-mpgis-quotes-inactive]

Lunch Lady Belinda: you are, without a doubt, the queen of toilet humor

Deandra: that's all I've ever wanted to be

[aestheticsyoutubers]

lunch lady belinda, most popular girls in school ↳ cheer tryouts (season 2, episode 13)

[haonsnow]

Christ, this is too accurate

[feverinfeveroutfic]

chapter twenty-six: rain on me

a/n: not gonna lie, this one was a little hard to write. yeah, i’m almost numb to bad things happening in the world, but i found this exceptionally difficult for some reason.

It would be another couple of months before any of them heard a peep from Metallica once more, and the whole entire span of the spring time, Sam yearned to see Cliff yet again: she never did give him the hat back to him following that show. She still wore it every day as she walked on to the subway and onward to her first class, but she always took it off after school let out and she took the subway back home, or she rode home with Charlie and Marla. It started on that first day after they had returned home from Syracuse and she took off the hat on the last hour of the ride home and she set it upon her lap. That manifested into a habit when she took the subway to and from school the day after: hat atop her head on the way day and all throughout the school day, but she took it off once she stepped onto the subway. She held it close to her chest when she stood next to the pole and she rested it upon her lap when she took a seat.

All the while, the bitter cold and the snows waned away from the Northeast and gave way to fresh new leaves upon the trees. The brim of his hat protected her eyes from the blinding sun as the spring term made its way forth.

It was a warm afternoon near the tail end of May following her introduction to stained glass class, which she continued to get the hang of, especially since it was only a single class during the week and Belinda wasn't too proud of that fact, either. Marla had asked her as to why that was the case and Belinda had no idea about it, and the little glass splinters in the girls' fingers only made the whole thing unappetizing. The whole thing was bittersweet to think about, especially since there was one week left before finals.

Meanwhile, she walked along the sidewalk with the brim of that dark hat held up high: she adjusted the brim with two fingers, the same ones with a bandage on either one. Perhaps it was the feeling of the sun to her back, but the hat upon her head made the crown feel hot to the touch. She strode past a ground level window and she stopped for a second to better adjust the hat for a bit of relief on her head. She gazed on at her face, which had grown rounder from the winter having gone by, and her body, slightly heavier and rounder.

Cliff and Joey's words to her rang through her mind whenever she saw her own reflection. Maybe they were enabling it. Maybe they were sincere with it. She had no idea as to what to think with it in mind.

Sam sighed through her nose and then she pressed onward to her building.

She made her way inside of the foyer and she spotted Aurora in the doorway of Emile's apartment. She giggled at something he had said to her, and Sam wandered closer to her. Aurora turned her head and her face lit up at the sight of her.

“Hey, Sam! How was school?”

“Good—what's going on?”

“Emile was just telling me something about something that happened to him down in New Orleans before he moved up here.”

“I should give you some of my Mardi Gras beads,” Emile himself called from inside of the apartment. “Both of you ladies, actually—”

“He has to find them first,” Aurora explained, and Sam wondered what was happening there between the two of them.

“I have to check my mail, anyways,” she gingerly added. “It is Wednesday, after all.” Sam scurried away from there and towards the metal mailboxes on the wall. She opened the little door, and in turn revealed three envelopes: a white one, which she assumed was from the school; a yellow one, which she knew was for her rent; and a soft pink one, which she wondered where it came from. She took them out of their hiding place and she examined the pink one first.

It took her a second to recognize Cliff's name scrawled on the front in blue ink. She peered over her shoulder, and Aurora had gone into Emile's apartment. She shut the mailbox door and doubled back down the corridor; she ducked past the door and she darted up the stairs to her place.

She couldn't open the door and take off that hat fast enough. She shook her dark hair about and left the door slightly ajar so a bit of a flow came in from the corridor behind her. She took her seat on the couch and, careful not to tear that soft pink paper, she opened the envelope and she took out his letter, which he wrote on a sheet of plain white paper. She had to read it twice given she wasn't familiar with his penmanship.

“Sam—dearest Samantha—

I'm writing to you from a little hotel room in Chicago. We're going out to Des Moines in about an hour, right before we go play at the Iowa State Fairgrounds, so I'm going to make this quick. Legacy are here right now, having flown out last night to see us at both shows. Given it's Memorial Day and school is almost out, Alex is sitting right next to me right now. Yeah, believe it or not, he's sitting right next to me and he's looking a little rounder than he was before when I got that little piece of rice paper from him—I'm thinking he ate pretty well over Christmas break, which makes me feel better about the way in which he's living well here. But I'm not here to tell you about him: I'm here to tell you how I feel about you.

The sun is shining right over me. It's going to be the Summer Solstice soon. And I think about the way in which you looked in the shrub there next to the bus, the way your hair seemed to shine even in the shadow. You are so beautiful and so gentle that I need to have you with me. What the hell was I thinking, not trusting you?

I need to be around you. I need to be closer to you. This is coming hot off the heels of my eavesdropping on Lars and James having a conversation about something, and then Kirk and James having a discussion about firing Lars. Alex and I both heard it loud and clear—but I guess Dave knows about it more than I do, too.

I'm a little worried about things coming to a head soon following the European stint of the tour. We're leaving for a couple of dates in over Europe right before Fourth of July weekend and then we come back to the Midwest about a week later—I don't get it, either. We come back to New York in August and then we leave for Europe for real after Labor Day weekend. I know that date in New York will be the last I see you for a while so I'm going to relish every second you and I are together there. It's the last date on the North American stint, too, so we can go and do something after the show. I can show you some of Canada if you wish—you'll love it up in Quebec.

I trust you with my life, Sam. As I'm writing this to you, I already feel empowered to stand up to James and Kirk. And I feel empowered to talk and rekindle things with Lars again. Even just on paper, you make me feel more of a man. You make me feel like a better man. Take that back: you make me a better man.

If nothing, I can do something beyond that. The power is in my hands. It's all within my hands if nothing else.

I had lunch with Chuck and Eric just a little bit ago and I spotted a bouquet of yellow tulips on the way there. I have another idea than that, though—another better idea that's bloomed out from the yellow tulips. I'll leave that little surprise for when we return to New York in August.

All my love,

Cliff.”

Her heart skipped a bit and she wondered what he had in store for her. A knock on the door caught her attention and Aurora poked her head into the apartment: Sam caught the sound of beads tinkling together behind the panel. Aurora showed her a series of hot pink and golden Mardi Gras beads.

“Party,” she said.

“Party indeed,” Sam echoed as she slipped the letter back into the envelope and she set it on the table next to her, even though she remembered that Aurora had seen them by the shrub. “By the way—are you and Emile friends to each other?”

“Yes!” she replied with a grin on her face, and she slipped the beads over Sam's head. She herself set her wounded fingers on the golden beads, which were all in the shape of fish. Her fingers ached from the glass splinters and those painful little wounds. Aurora frowned at the bandages.

“Scars from being around Belinda,” Sam replied with a shrug of her shoulders, and that made her chuckle. She nibbled on her bottom lip and Aurora shifted her weight a bit.

“Is there something you wanna tell me?” Sam asked her, as she glanced over at the pink envelope right next to her knee.

“Is there something you wanna tell me?” Aurora echoed her. She nibbled on her bottom lip and she lowered her gaze to the beads around her neck.

“Promise not to tell anyone?” Sam asked her in a low voice, and without a moment's hesitation, Aurora stuck out her pinky finger. They linked fingers to bond it together; Sam then fetched up a sigh.

“Okay. I've been seeing Cliff.”

“I had a feeling that was the case,” Aurora confessed with a nod of her head.

“It's long distance, though,” Sam continued as she reached for the pink envelope. “He and I hung out together over Christmas break at my parents' house. I also got to meet his parents and his sister, too. We even had our first fight.”

“Wow,” Aurora raised her eyebrows at that.

“Yeah. We're—pretty much a thing now.” She turned over the envelope so Aurora could see the scrawl inked on the front. “He just wrote a letter to me from Chicago. He just told me that I make him a better man.”

Aurora cocked her head to the side and brought a hand to her chest.

“Oh, my god,” she breathed out.

“Yeah. It's so sweet, isn't it?”

“That's so romantic.”

“He even gave me his hat!” Sam picked up the black hat from the couch cushion next to her.

“I was wondering where you got that!” Aurora confessed.

“He's just—he's been nothing to sweet to me. I think—I think he might be the one.”

Aurora took a seat on the arm of the couch, right next to her.

“Did Marla tell you we drew him in class?” Sam asked her.

“No!” Aurora's face turned bright pink at the sound of that.

“Yeah. He came into our drawing class back in January after his date had been pushed back a couple of times, and—let's just say I have yet to show it to him.” Sam flashed her a wink.

“Boyfriend and muse,” Aurora concluded.

“Boyfriend and muse...” Sam's voice trailed off at that and she lay the envelope upon her lap. She imagined Cliff himself right next to her. Her dark prince upon his black horse. She turned her head into Aurora's direction.

“What's going on with you and Emile?” She cleared her throat.

“Same story there,” Aurora confessed.

“Really?” Sam gaped at that.

“Yeah. I showed up here some time ago and I asked him where your apartment is. It was raining that day, too, and I didn't know it was going to, either, so he let me into his place for a cup of tea and he also offered to help me dry off. Apparently, he and his wife are separated—” Aurora shifted her weight on the arm of the couch and she grimaced a little bit at the sound of that. “But same story there, too: he's been nothing but sweet to me. One of the first genuinely lovely things he told me was he loves how I'm vegetarian. He's such a kind person, and you are lucky to have him for her landlord, Sam. That kind, genteel Southern politeness and everything...”

“Wait, back up.” Sam set a hand on her arm. “—he and his wife aren't fully divorced?”

“I don't think so. He hasn't told me anything about it outside of a flippant comment.”

Sam couldn't help but chuckle at that. Aurora's stoic expression broke into a chuckle as well.

“Oh, my god—Aurora!” Sam burst out laughing. “The power of the Korean peninsula!”

“The Korean peninsula plus the long time proximity to Mexico,” she added. “We've inadvertently become a couple of vixens.”

“Marla, Belinda, and Zelda are, too,” Sam pointed out.

“On the surface,” Aurora corrected her, “and as far as we know. We might be in a league of our own amongst the five of us.”

“Yeah, you're kind of the quiet workhorse. And I'm the fat artist.”

“Oh, come on, Sam—you've got lovely curves. You're a true vixen yourself!”

“And the quiet ones have the most cunning minds...” Sam then set her bandaged fingers on the beads once again. “Party,” she said.

“Party!” Aurora echoed, and they high fived each other.

“Care for a drink? I just have cream soda and some pho, interestingly enough.”

“Do you have ice cream? We can have cream soda floats with that nice soup.”

“Nah, just the soda. We're gonna have plenty of cream, anyways.”

* * * * *

The heat of the summer crept its way into the Bronx, but every so often, warm summer rain kept it at bay. Sam had no intent on taking summer school with Belinda and Marla, but she did take up the offer to work side by side with Aurora at the record label as her assistant. It was mostly sorting papers and fetching her drinks during work hours, but it was something and it got her out of the otherwise hot apartment. Meanwhile, at night, she returned home and worked on some drawings before she fell asleep. The main building itself felt so empty and hollow without Anthrax there with them: she also hadn't heard a peep from Dan Lilker in months, either, and thus she assumed that Nuclear Assault had gone on tour themselves.

She thought about Cliff and she even contemplated counting down the days to the end of August. He never wrote to her once again and thus she considered writing back to him. However, since Metallica switched labels, she had no idea as to how to write to him, and given they were on tour, there was no way she could call him up in one of their many hotel rooms. Aurora had too much on her plate to begin with and so she couldn't ask her about it.

“It is a pretty big network, though,” she pointed out to her one morning in late July. “If you ask around, you could probably find a lead of sorts. Maybe you can ask Zelda.”

“Why her? 'Cause she's with Louie?”

“No, 'cause she's within the whole pipeline of musicians as well as with Louie. He especially probably knows his way around the Bay Area and she probably has an idea herself.”

Sam sighed through her nose. That would mean she would have to make the drive out to Providence to their place.

The phone rang right then and Aurora picked up. Sam kept her eyes fixated on the floor before her. She thought about as to what to draw that evening as a relief of sorts when Aurora's concerned tone of voice caught her ear.

“Wow, really? How did he do that?”

Sam turned her head into her direction and she noticed the look of concern on Aurora's face.

“Uh huh—” She raised her gaze in Sam's direction, and they gazed at one another with wide eyes.

“Oh, my god,” Aurora muttered with a look of disgust on her face. “Oh. Okay. Okay, yes—”

Sam bowed her head a bit. She wished to know what her best friend was hearing.

“Okay,” Aurora continued. “Okay, thank you. I'll tell Jon and Marsha as soon as possible.” She hung up the phone right then.

“What happened?” Sam asked her.

“James broke his arm skate boarding. They might cancel part of the tour.”

Sam gaped at her.

“W-Where are they?” she stammered.

“Nashville. And he broke his arm two days ago while in Evansville. Over in Indiana. The person I just spoke to said they might do a couple more dates and then call it good for a bit before they go to Europe.”

“So—they're not gonna come to New York City again,” Sam concluded in a small voice, to which Aurora shrugged.

“I don't think so. She said he messed it up pretty bad. He might not even be able to play guitar for a time until he's fully healed. We're gonna have to tell Marla, Belinda, and Zelda, too—you know we all were gonna be there. All of us. Altogether, with Anthrax and another band called Armored Saint...”

Sam tiled her head back and closed her eyes.

“Fuck!” she declared.

“I know, right? They already had to cancel their Northwest dates back in June, too. But—so much for that, though.” Aurora's face fell at the thought of it.

“Well, what should we do now?” Sam asked her as she ran her fingers through her dark hair.

“Well—she said they plan on playing tonight down in Nashville, followed by tomorrow's date in Chattanooga, then Knoxville, and a couple more and then they go home for a month so James can recuperate. I guess the best thing to do is to call Cliff because she said he's kind of a wreck right now.”

“I would imagine...” Sam's voice trailed off as she remembered what Cliff had told her in his letter.

Indeed, when she returned home later that night, the very first thing she did was pick up the phone. She dialed his number, but she caught his answering machine instead. If they planned on playing a few more dates, then surely he could find her message once he stepped in through the door. The very first thing he would see was her message to him.

“Hi, Cliff—it's Sam. I'm just calling to say that—I heard the news. I heard about what happened to James and I'm just kinda—thinking of you guys right now. Give me a call back once you get this. I love you.”

Without another word, she hung up the phone.

Over the next week, she went off to work with the hot summer sun upon her head and yet that big black hat protected her every step of the way. By the beginning of August, and James' birthday on the third, she expected a call from him, but he never did.

She returned home and checked her machine for any sign of him. Nothing. It seemed so unlike him, especially after all he had said to her in his letter.

A thunderstorm rattled the Bronx on the day in which they were supposed to play there in New York City, and thus Sam got the idea to write back to him. He was back home and she remembered that they would leave for Europe soon enough. She had to make it quick.

She picked up the pencil and she scribbled all along the top line of the paper first. She had no idea as to how to write up that letter to him further than “my dear Cliff.” Sam leaned back and she gazed out the window in front of her, at the rain as it pattered on the window pane before her and the dark menacing clouds across the sky. Perhaps a piece of art could bring something out of him, and yet everything she had made up to that point had been in her journals or they were things she had planned for the autumn and her sophomore year of school. Perhaps a piece of erotic art could bring something out of him, given she sat there in nothing more than her bra and a small pair of shorts that fit her hips a bit more snugly than before.

She could lay on her side before a mirror and make a drawing of herself from the reflection for him. Show off her new curves to him.

But she had nothing to say to him, much to her surprise, and yet she had so much to say to him. She set down the pencil on the tray at the bottom of her desk when the phone rang. She was quick to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Sam.” That voice.

“Oh, my god, Cliff, I was just thinking of calling you.” She ran her fingers through her dark hair.

“I've been meaning to do so but—a bunch of things have happened this past month. First off—Lars and I have rekindled things between us.”

“Oh, good!”

“The day after James broke his arm, he cozied next to me on the bus and he confessed that he wanted someone to talk to about it. I guess James is kinda pissy when he's in pain. So we watched Blazing Saddles together and had some pizza and he shared with me one of his many Danish desserts—I can't remember what it's called but it was spectacular. I told him the two of us have to hang out with him and his whole Danish spiel more in the future. And we started talking again.”

“How're things between him and them?” she asked him as she set her free hand on her hip.

“No idea and I feel like James and Kirk are still track to do it after our European dates. But—oh my god, you're gonna love this. And—I have to keep my voice down because I'm in our rehearsal spot here in San Francisco. And I dunno... I don't think they're here right now, if I'm perfectly honest. But—still. Better I keep my voice low.”

“What's up?”

“Back in June, we played in San Diego and Legacy played the night before us, so the four of us got to see them. One of the guys from Armored Saint, the band who toured with us and the boys, started to come after Lars. I didn't even know what was going on, either—it was all right behind me. But I guess Dave was there with us. And this guy was—I think he was pissed at Lars for whatever reason. And he came after him and Dave caught him, took him outside, and just beat the absolute shit out of him. Protected Lars and none of us knew it had happened until Dave told me about it after the fact.”

“Wow,” she breathed out.

“Yeah. The guys up on stage didn't even see it and Chuck and Louie see everything up there—that's according to them, anyways.”

She chuckled at that. And then she remembered.

“By the way, what did you want to do with me? Given tonight you guys were supposed to be here and you had to pull out for the time being.”

“Oh, yeah. I was gonna ask you if we could make it official between us.”

“Officially boyfriend and girlfriend,” she followed along.

“Yeah. It just makes sense to me, even if it is long distance at this point.”

“Of course. I'd love to do that.”

“Then it's official, baby doll,” he declared in a soft whisper of a voice. “You have a boyfriend now.”

Voices in the background on his end cut him off.

“I gotta go. We're flying out to Wales in a couple of days. It's a whole two week affair just so we adjust and go through customs and all that jazz.”

“Right, right...”

“Kirk needs to use the phone, too.”

“By the way, Cliff?” she piped up again.

“Uh huh?”

“Call me when you get there,” she told him.

“Of course. You have a good night for me.”

“You, too.”

They hung up at the same time right as a clap of thunder caught her off guard. If she had to draw in the dark, she would.

And she was eager to start school again within a couple of weeks as well, and once again, the week following Labor Day. Fresh off the heels of her first year, she wished to see what that second year held for her given the cuts on her fingers had long healed and Belinda vowed that the next level up would be far more exciting. She already knew the basics and thus she could foresee a stained glass window much like the ones in that front hallway from her hung up there for the whole school and the world to see.

A drawing class, a watercolor class, stained glass, more art history, and algebra, the latter of which she needed to fill in one of her elective credits. That was according to Bill when she signed up for classes.

“Gonna be a lot more hectic this year,” he vowed to her with a cunning smile on his face, but she knew she would enjoy it especially when she knew she also kept the part time shift next to Aurora. Just a lot more to do but she knew she would enjoy it.

She stayed on her feet for the entirety of both of her drawing and watercolor classes and the whole entire first week, she envisioned Metallica, Anthrax, and Armored Saint in that concert hall in Wales. She tried to picture them all as she sketched out a series of faces similar to them on that large sheet of paper she had been asked to have for the former. Given part of their personal journal included wildlife studies, Marla suggested she draw plants around them given it was the United Kingdom, in all of its greenery and lushness. Sam also recalled that they had missed playing the Pacific Northwest as well.

Given the drawing itself was due at the end of the month, she gradually worked on it with a bit of colored pencil and only the hardest of her graphite pencils. She thought of giving it a splash of watercolor at some point, but she decided not to do it.

And she still hadn't shown Cliff the drawing of him. She itched to show it to him once she handed that large drawing by the end of that third week of school. She strode out of the classroom and up the street so as to start her short shift for the rest of that afternoon. It was a cool late autumn afternoon, and the gray clouds overhead beckoned a fresh round of rain. But when she reached the front step, she was met with Aurora herself, who looked as though she had seen a ghost.

“Um, Sam?” Aurora called to her once she came within earshot.

“Yeah?” She frowned at the grave look on her friend's face, and she glanced behind her, and there was Marla right behind her, who had one hand on her mouth as if she had something horrific.

“Is everything okay?” Sam asked them as she adjusted the brim of the hat: she picked up that earthy smell of rain. Marla fetched up a sigh and she doubled back for something. Sam halted in front of Aurora and butterflies emerged inside of her stomach.

“What's going on?” she asked her in a small voice, and Aurora's face fell. She swallowed and closed her eyes for a few seconds. Marla returned with a white cordless phone in hand.

“Something happened,” she replied in an equally small voice. “Something that you should know.”

She handed her the cordless with a solemn look on her face. Reluctant, Sam took the phone and then she brought it to her ear and the butterflies in her stomch kept on whirring about.

“Hello?” she started in a low voice.

“Sam!” Lars' voice crackled onto the other end. “Sam! Horrible! Things! Really bad things! Fucking—fucking hell!”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Sam interjected with a wave of her hand, “whoa, Lars. Lars, slow down! What happened?”

He sputtered and blithered a serious of things in Danish but then he gasped.

“Lars!” Sam cried out, and she held still right there when she was met with silence. “Lars? Are you there?”

“—yes?” he said in a broken voice.

“What happened?”

He let out a long low sigh.

“What happened?”

“I'm sorry,” he started and she could hear tears in his voice, “I just—I haven't been able to talk to James and Kirk about it. I needed someone to vent to.”

“What happened, Lars?” she asked him, gentle.

“There—There was an accident,” he sputtered. “A bus accident. Our bus went off the road—we were in Sweden. In the middle of the night. We were all asleep when it went off the road. We rolled over. Cliff—is gone.”

Sam's eyes widened and she almost dropped the phone itself. It was as if the rug had been yanked right out from right underneath her.

“What do you mean he's gone?” she asked him as she felt her stomach and her heart sink.

“He's gone. He was—crushed by the bus.”

Her stomach turned. Her knees quivered and quaked. She had to catch herself on the counter behind her. She thought about the letter Cliff had written to her. His words were set in stone at that moment. He never even called her when they got to Wales, either.

Lars' voice quivered and waved away with tears. The smell of rain grew stronger and Aurora stepped inside; Sam could make out the tears in her eyes.

“He's gone, Sam. He's—He's just—he's gone.”

[regrettablewritings]

Podcasts, Youtubes, and TV Shows to Distract Yourself With Because Why Not, and Also Because I Wanna Blab About Some of These

Since I can’t go to work and horrify my coworkers/make them realize I’m a mess and/or nerd by telling them about the type of media I’m into, I’m foisting my recommendations on all of y’all who choose to read this. I frankly do not care how many people have actually heard of these things because I’m also sure there’s plenty of people who, like me, are very slow and oblivious to entertainment, or who have heard of the property but were never that convinced.

Kipo and the Age of the Wonderbeasts

Type: TV series

200 years after a mysterious yet earth-shattering event, much of humanity has taken to living beneath the surface in communities called burrows, wherein life goes on, if effected somewhat by the bizarre fauna that exists above them (referred to as “mutes”, short for “mutant”). One burrow girl, Kipo, founds her world turned almost literally inside-out when she finds herself not only separated from her father and the only world she’s ever known, but on the surface, no less. What ensues is her trying to find her way back home with the help of a stony-faced little girl with a massive chip on her shoulder; a music enthusiast and his literal gadfly friend; and some . . . unusual allies that only an oblivious optimist like Kipo could make. All to a kickass soundtrack, a beautiful backdrop of art, and a world where animals have basically evolved into gangs under a looming threat known as Scarlemagne. If you can’t already tell, I love this series to bits and now is the perfect time for people to get into it and encourage another season of it. Just . . . don’t think too hard that whatever happened to cause the Event in the show happened in October 2020 . . .

Available on: Netflix

My Dad Wrote a Porno

Type: Podcast

This should go without saying, but this podcast is definitely meant for more mature audiences. Or somebody with a strong stomach. Not that it’ll always be easy to tell with the type of content this series gives. When Jamie Morton’s father handed him his manuscripts for his self-published books, he had no idea he was being given a pinnacle of a polished turd: It was erotica. Really, really, really bad erotica. But the ear’s trash is the heart’s pleasure with this bad girl, as Jamie enlists the company of friends Alice and James to provide commentary on “Rocky Flintstone”’s series Belinda Blinked, a drama chronicling the sexcapades of Belinda Blumenthal as she climbs the ladders (and men and women) both in and out of the cut-throat world of pots and pans sales. What follows is a goldmine of awkward metaphors, strange bedmates, and just an overall stampede of whiplashing events that somehow exceed expectations. Listen in if you dare . . . And make sure you’re in good company for it. Fun Fact, though: Daisy Ridley, Ben Barnes, Lin-Manuel Miranda, Michael Sheen, Mara Wilson, Elijah Wood are but a few well-known fans of this series! Nobody is safe . . .

Available on: Wherever podcasts can be found

Lore

Type: Podcast

Sometimes, truth is stranger than fiction. And what better way to be reminded of that, then to have the dulcet tones of Aaron Mahnke tell you about the lighthouse incident that the 2016 movie The Lighthouse was loosely inspired by? Suffice to say, this podcast could also be interpreted with some advised discretion, but definitely in a way that’s different from My Dad Wrote a Porno. In the centuries humankind has existed, we’ve managed to create a menagerie of beasts, both fictional and in ourselves. Lore explores all the many different kinds of events and persons and creatures we have to offer. In any given episode, we could be talking about anything from the bizarre story of a lady who convinced 18th century physicians that she was giving birth to rabbits, to something more disturbing like the life of H.H. Holmes. Or something as relatively innocuous as the relationship between gremlins and flight. Regardless of the subject, however, you’ll definitely walk away knowing something new, if bizarre. And perhaps slightly terrifying.

Available on: Wherever podcasts can be found

The Amelia Project

Type: Podcast

Congratulations: You have been made aware of The Amelia Project. If you’re not interested in this, exit the page. Now. If you continue, there’s no unhearing it. Good choice! A new interest awaits. If you don’t enjoy it, please consider the whole thing a hoax. Okay but in all seriousness, there’s no way to do The Amelia Project justice in just a simple description. The plot sounds quite simple, really: People want to disappear and start a new life, The Amelia Project is there to help – with a price. And that’s if you can actually get a hold of them! What really makes the show, however, are the people and the writing, and I’m not just talking about the almost childlike Interviewer with an obsession for hot cocoa. I’m talking about the clientele: I’m talking about the macabre-obsessed theme park owner who’s out for revenge; the cult leader who’s in way over his head; a Santa impersonator stuck in a miserable marriage with his own manager; an actual podcast character trying to outrun his creators. And obviously this would all be nowhere without the spectacular writing! I really can explain this series without blabbing on and potentially spoiling things; The Amelia Project is an experience!

Available on: Wherever podcasts can be found

LegalEagle

Type: Youtube channel

To be frank, I just like learning for the sake of learning, even if I may not always necessarily understand the topic or have any plans to use it in the foreseeable future. The big difference here being that at least this channel makes learning about the law fun and breaks it down. Headed by a certified lawyer (because what an age we live in, where professionals actually take time out of their lives to teach us common folk), there’s a multitude of series D.J. Stone uses to help break down the complex world of law, from reviewing the realism of procedural favorites (Law & Order, The Good Wife, HTGAWM, etc), to analyzing real-life situations, to even watching childhood media that has nothing to do with the law and determining how much money, say, Willy Wonka would owe in a lawsuit. In short, it is one of my worst subjects done in one of my favorite ways to learn! Plus, Stone hates business students and is perfectly willing to poke fun at law students so it’s all fun, frankly.

Available on: Youtube

Nando v Movies

Type: Youtube channel

Sometimes, movies are bad. Sometimes, they’re good. And sometimes, they could use a few adjustments in hindsight. Especially the nerdier movies where the directors may or may not have tried way too hard or way too little. And that’s where Nando comes in: Whether it’s explaining why a different villain might have worked better for a hero’s origin story movie, or analyzing how one seemingly small adjustment could’ve potentially made more sense in explaining characterization, this channel is always providing a new perspective on a movie or show you’ve probably seen and maybe weren’t necessarily too pleased with. (Or maybe you were – I enjoyed Justice League okay but I love the version he rewrote more.) Oh, yeah: Sometimes he does rewrites of movies or even series. So if you’re anything like me and you’re way into that, this is a channel you don’t want to miss out on.

Available on: Youtube

DEATH BATTLE!

Type: Youtube channel

Does anyone remember Deadliest Warrior? No? . . . How about that one time during lunch where you and your friend got into it over who would win in a death match between Superman and Goku? Good news: A buncha geeks did the math for you and have come out with the results! Specifically, hosts Wiz and Boomstick have analyzed the weapons, armor, and skills of each combatant in every episode, resulting in an ongoing series of absolute nonsense and satiation of bloodshed. The description is admittedly nothing crazy, but the amount of detail applied is honestly where it’s at: From calculating how loud Black Canary’s screams are to approximating Scrooge McDuck’s speed (I’m not kidding you), there’s actual thought put into the characters being assembled and how they might fair with their respective combatant. And it all comes together for an actual fight, often animated but always amazing. So if you’ve ever wondered if Thor could beat Wonder Woman, or if McGruff the Crime Dog stands a chance against Smokey the Bear (I’m…I’m being honest), then this is the show for you!

Available on: Youtube

Sideways

Type: Youtube channel

If there is music in that movie or show, it will be analyzed to a degree that, unless you’ve been trained in music, you would’ve probably never thought about. There isn’t necessarily much rhyme or reason to Sideways’ videos in terms of themes beyond music, but really, must they? Is it not enough that this man is screaming to the internet these wack and awesome trends he’s noticed in certain pieces associated with movies and musicals and the genius behind them? Could life not just be him explaining the symbolism of the instruments associated with the Crystal Gems of Steven Universe, or breaking down the cultures explored by way of the Black Panther soundtrack? Also, here’s a fun drinking game: Take a shot every time he mentions leitmotifs or the Dies Irae.

Available on: Youtube

Craig of the Creek

Type: TV show

In the woods of suburban Maryland, there exists a kid’s utopia: A place where horse girls are free to roam the fields, where a boy can be a king of garbage, and where children travel the sewers completely unsupervised. That is, until the dinner horn rings; then they have to go home until the next time they can return to The Creek. The show focuses on one specific trio (Craig, JP, and Kelsey) as every day, The Creek (and their own childish naivete) brings them new hijinks to experience. There’s a blissful lightheartedness to the show, in addition to a lot of creativity that feels like it was ripped straight out of your own imagination as a child (robots made from cardboard boxes, building portals using lights, etc). But beneath it all, there’s something just plain wild brewing. I don’t want to spoil anything, but CotC has some G-rated GOT shit going on the further along the series goes and I can’t wait to see how it all unfolds!

Available on: CN app, wcostream.com

And that’s probably enough for now, I think. Lemme know if you want any other suggestions, or how you’re findin’ ‘em if you take any of them up! Stay safe, stay healthy my dudes!

[dragonwarriorgal]

Fate: The Winx Saga episode 3. Heavy Mortal Hopes

Well this is the halfway point in this season, might as well have cryptic vision when Bloom was JUST BORN. Also, how the hell would this old lady (who I am assuming is Belinda) know that baby Bloom would have comprehended the ominous message?

Ah, yes, I have now made the connections based on the opening theme song that this show is very magical and whimsical and will rock you to sleep with soothing music...

These action/training sessions are starting earlier and earlier each episode... well time for some gay undertones and me yelling at the screen for River(high guy) and the new guy(don't care, he contributes nothing to this story other than being gay) to JUST FUCK ALREADY!

Riven: I'm just trying to figure out why the fuck you started things up with her again Me: THANK YOU! Show: FOR DRAMATIC REASONS!!!!

Ok, I gotta admit, hearing the words "It's butt stuff" coming from a show with fairies and witches got a chuckle out of me.

Are we actually having some development of their powers and be actual school instead of diet Sabrina?

"You cool?" Aisha: "Just tired of dealing with your shit all the time, now it is time for MY development you twat" I mean it came out of nowhere because this is THE THIRD EPISODE OF A SIX EPISODE SERIES and we are only NOW getting to know their characters and whatnot

Terra: "You can tell me what's wrong with Silva, Dad, I'm not a kid anymore" Me: "Yes, but you are an annoying blabber! I really don't think it is a good idea for your father to tell you about the infected teacher!"

Yes, let's talk about our evil plans between classes, it's not like those students who are WALKING RIGHT PAST YOU will hear anything RIGHT!?!?!?!?

"People talk" he says during lunch break in the STUDENTS CAFETERIA!!!!!!!

Bloom is so SELFISH!!!

If Silva starts to say "Braaaiiins" I will lose it.

How cool would it be if Silva had some gray hairs or completely gray hair, it would be badass to see him kicking ass but ever since Dalinar from the Stormlight Archive I have been finding old soldiers trope to be very cool.

Who the hell are they?

Well, that was a weird scene and pointless, the only thing it did was saying: "heads up, there's going to be a new character and he is hot!"

Good to know that there have been few weeks between episode 2&3

This show has the weirdest locations for important stuff. I mean are they SERIOUSLY having A BATTLE STRATEGY MEETING IN THE MAIN HALL?!!??!? Also "hot" Marco is not that hot and more bland.

I can smell the teen angst from this party

Pop song number 1 (there are like 10 songs in this party alone)

Ok, at first I was a bit "meh" of the whole Musa x Sam(Terra's brother) storyline, but this episode made it possible to grow on me.

Oh. No. Terra... do you really have to have a crush on the gay best friend

Wow. The sexual tension! I honestly thought that they were going to have m/m/f threesome! IN A SHOW ABOUT FAIRIES!

I feel like going to put up a cheerleading outfit to cheer Sky TO FINALLY HAVING THE BALLS TO STAND UP TO STELLA!!

Ah, so the grandma in the vision was Rosalind...

So you're planning on going to hunt down and fight this Burned One yourself... on the same night as the mandatory party in Teen TV drama... which you yourself had a quite a few beers during that beer pong scene?...sigh

W.O.W. That fight scene was so bad

And OF COURSE IT WAS THE EXACT BURNED ONE WHO INFECTED SILVA!

*crosses fingers* breakupbreakupbreakupbreakupBREAKUP!

He walked away! Hopefully it means he finally sees reason!

Oh, poor poor, CLUELESS Terra.

and yet another cliffhanger after Bloom being very selfish...

All in all, I am grateful for the character development episode, because there were absolutely nothing in the last episode except for maybe Musa and Sam (I really don’t care if that is not his name), it is understandable, this being a 6 episode series, but still. I am also hoping to see Sky grow some balls, but I think those balls went to Aisha instead with her confronting Bloom. But Aisha being all of a sudden horrible in her studies was a heel turn, came out of nowhere. And this series has almost no sense of time, they actually had to tell the audience “it has been few weeks”, “I had that vision a week ago”... I HAD NO IDEA!

Man, am I glad to be halfway through...

[themostpopulargreasersintulsa]

[writethehousedown]

And The Livin's Easy, Chapter Three (Multi) - Zyan

a/n: hello! welcome to chapter four of zyan tries her best to juggle all of the characters. i think we’re pretty much done as far as introductions go? so here’s where things start to get interesting. hope you enjoy! my sideblog is @chachkisalpaca - and frey is an angel for beta-ing.

“Is that a hickey?” Jan asks during their improvised breakfast.

It’s still early, so there aren’t many people at the beach just yet. The Sun is up and shining bright, and Gigi is so sleep deprived she forgot about the purple spot in the crook of her neck.

Gigi shakes off the tiredness and blinks repeatedly, her cheeks getting as red as a tomato when she notices all of her friends are staring at her. She decides that there’s no point in lying and sets down her plastic cup with steaming hot coffee Jackie somehow managed to prepare.

“I had sex with someone last night,” she simply says with a shrug. The screeches from her friends hurt her ears, but she had seen them coming.

“What? When did your hoe ass get a hook up?” Brita exclaims, “Did you download fucking Tinder again, sneaked out when we were all asleep, and came back?” Gigi laughs at Brita’s incredulous tone, though she’s nervous and her cheeks are still red.

“Ew, no, you know I don’t do dating apps. That’s how my ex happened,” Gigi says, matter-of-factly, “You see, Nicky was hoarding the tent with her inflatable mattress—”

“Hey! I did ask you if you wanted to sleep with me!” Nicky complains, folding her arms, though a laugh fights to escape her mouth.

“Yeah, and I told you my name’s not Jackie,” Gigi deadpans, and both Nicky and Jackie shut their mouths. She smiles cheekily and goes on. “Anyway, as I was saying; I left the tent, walked along the beach, found this girl all alone, talked a bit, and I guess it just happened.”

She purposely leaves out that the girl was no one other than Crystal, and they entered the sea, floating near the shore until, much like Gigi predicted it, she fell off the board and Crystal had to drag her back to the shore. The fabric of her tank top stuck to her skin, making her shiver like crazy, and Crystal tried to help her warm up, she really did — but one thing led to another, and before Gigi knew it, Crystal was sucking on her neck as her hands pinned her down.

The girls holler, not believing what they’re hearing. All of them say some sort of variation of there’s no way your game is that good, and Gigi just lets them talk as she sips on her coffee.

Her phone rings in her bag so she aims for it, juggling to unlock it. She bites back a smile when she sees the notification from Instagram.

@crystalandmeth has started following you.

Gigi wants to smack Crystal for having such a handle. No wonder she couldn’t find her when she searched her up after that night at the bar.

*

Scarlet vaguely scans the pool; it’s just opened and it’s still fairly early, but there are girls sunbathing, taking pictures, and some children playing by the edge of the tiny pool, splashing each other. She smiles at that. Sometimes she even likes the kids - when they’re not pushing each other into the big pool and Scarlet has to prevent a child from drowning, that is.

The hotel is medium sized, but since it’s the summer, there’s not a room that’s not booked. She knows. Her mothers have owned it for the last twenty years. She grew up running around the halls and with the noise of the tourists settling in their rooms, dragging their suitcases with big smiles plastered across their faces.

Though her mothers have insisted that she didn’t have to work at the hotel during the summer if she didn’t want to, Scarlet had decided to fill the position of lifeguard for the morning shift until they find someone else. It’s not as if she minds, anyway; she has nothing better to do, since all of her friends traveled outside the country for their vacations, leaving her stuck in the island. That’s the downside of being friends with stuck up rich kids, she supposes.

She tells a few kids to stop running, brings back a volleyball that ended up landing on the deep side of the pool, and that’s about it, for the most part. The morning shift is very laid back; the pool usually gets crowded during the afternoon, but that’s Adore and Courtney’s problem.

Lunch time rolls around before she notices it, and she closes the pool with a relieved sigh, immediately going to the cafeteria.

Scarlet picks a frozen burrito and asks one of the ladies working at the cafeteria if they can pretty please heat it up with the nice microwave they have in the kitchen. Belinda rolls her eyes with a playful smile and squeezes Scarlet’s cheek before complying with her wishes.

“Damn, I didn’t know we could ask to use the good microwave,” a voice pipes up from her side. Scarlet giggles and turns around to look at whoever said that.

She’s met with the sight of a gorgeous woman with pink wavy hair. Scarlet licks her lips before answering.

“Oh, no, that’s uh, that’s staff privilege.” She shrugs, and the woman clicks her tongue, visibly disappointed. Scarlet looks at her plate and cocks an amused brow when she sees the bland vegetarian sandwich. “I don’t think you’ll need the microwave now, though,” she points out, nudging at her plate, and the woman stifles a laugh.

“Ah, that, yeah. This is all my stomach can handle right now — one of my friends got a little too carried away doing the drinks last night,” she comments, shifting her weight from one foot to another. Scarlet chuckles, she knows the feeling.

“Hangover food? Been there. I’m a little bolder though, I prefer French fries with a lot of ketchup,” she replies, just when Belinda hands her back her burrito. Scarlet blows a kiss her way and turns her attention back to the woman, slightly biting her lip before speaking. “D’you wanna sit together? I mean, unless you’re waiting for your friends.”

“No, it’s fine, I’m not waiting for them, I’d be stuck here for hours if I was,” she dismisses it with a wave of her hand and laughs. Scarlet thinks she has a pretty laugh. “I’m Yvie.”

“I’m Scarlet,” she introduces herself with a shiny smile.

*

Crystal sighs as she juggles her phone, struggling to put it on speaker as she currently is trying to make a decent lunch — never mind the fact it’s four p.m. and she skipped breakfast to sleep in.

She finally manages to put it on speaker and Vanessa’s voice fills the room, her tone far too annoyed and one Crystal’s grown to know all too well.

“Can you believe it, Crys? She’s but a child, and the bitch is almost thirty! I’m disgusted,” Vanessa rants, and Crystal almost snaps her optic nerve with the way she rolls her eyes.

“Vanj, hold the fuck up. Plastique is twenty two, in case you didn’t know, and Brooke is still twenty seven; the gap isn’t that big,” Crystal says. “’Sides, you two broke up last year, it’s obvious that she has moved on. So why don’t you focus on your hot bodybuilder girlfriend before I steal her off you.” She smiles cheekily when Vanessa gasps offended on the other side of the line.

“Hey! Plastic, Plastique, or whatever her name is, looks like a fucking teenager. How was I supposed to know?” She defends herself; Crystal can almost see her folding her arms with a childish pout. “Kameron is doing some gigs in California, photographing for an ice skating tour or some shit. She’s busy, but I did invite her for the competition.”

“Ajá.” Crystal is more focused in her lunch, making sure to cut the pepper as thin as possible. She knows it would’ve been easier to just order takeout, buy a soda from the drugstore around the corner, and settle in the couch and watch some garbage TV, but sometimes she misses the taste of a home cooked meal.

Vanessa goes on, talking her ear off about Kameron and how happy she is with her. She rolls her eyes; for someone in a happy relationship she sure talks a lot about her ex.

“…But that’s enough ‘bout me. What happened with you last night? Jaida came back way before you, bitch, and you reeked of sex. Like, you could barely walk straight, and you weren’t that shit faced. Spill, Glass,” Vanessa changes the topic, and Crystal nearly cuts her finger with the knife.

Her cheeks heat up when she remembers what happened at the beach with Gigi. Crystal doesn’t know if telling her to take off her soaked clothes on a whim had been a good or a bad idea, but she doesn’t regret anything — even if she still has sand in her scalp.

She clears her throat before speaking, glad that Vanessa can’t see her awfully red cheeks.

“Well, uh, remember Smoothie Girl?” she begins, throwing the pepper in the cooking pot. Vanessa musters an affirmative response. Crystal breathes in deeply. “So, like, Jaida and I finish our thing, and she tells me we should stop sleeping around, and I got excited, thinking she wanted to go on a date or something like that. But no, she actually meant that in a literal way, and naturally, I had already embarrassed myself,” Crystal rants with a groan. Vanessa just listens, “So, she left and I just. Stared at the water I guess. Then Smoothie Girl appeared out of nowhere, shit happened, one thing led to another, and suddenly I was pinning her to the ground.”

There’s silence on Vanessa’s end for what seems like an eternity, and Crystal proceeds to cut the chicken in tiny cubes, trying to not let her nerves get the best of her. She expected Vanessa to screech so loud she’d end up deaf.

“So, what you’re tryin’ to tell me is that your cheesy ass got ditched, and instead of moping around for a week, you went and slept with someone else right after?” She inquires slowly, as if she’s talking to an infant. Crystal rolls her eyes.

“Yeah.”

“Bullshit, Glass,” Vanessa declares calmly, “There’s no way in hell. You’re bullshitting me. You’ve been chasing Jaida Eleanor Hall’s ass for two years now—”

“Hey! That’s not true. It’s been a year and a half,” Crystal defends herself.

“—a year and a half, and you didn’t feel the least bit heartbroken? Really?”

Crystal shrugs, but soon realizes that’s stupid; Vanessa can’t see her.

“Vanj, you act as if I was in love with Jaida, to begin with,” she points out, perching herself against the countertop for a moment. “The girl was hot, I won’t deny it, and the sex was great — but, like, I told you I didn’t think we’d ever be something serious. I don’t hold any grudges against her.” And it’s true. Crystal’s disappointment at the moment had been magnified by the fact she made a fool of herself by misunderstanding what Jaida meant, and the alcohol usually made her a more sensitive person, if that was even possible.

Vanessa stays silent for a moment yet again, until she hears a loud sigh and some rumbling. Crystal frowns as she throws the chicken to the cooking pot, turning up the flames.

“Alright, I believe you, Glass. Now tell me, you and Smoothie Girl…?” She leaves the sentence hanging, prompting Crystal to complete it.

She laughs shortly, before checking her phone and seeing a notification from Instagram. She grins cheekily, wondering if Gigi had waited so long to follow her on purpose.

*

Jaida takes a spoonful of ice cream, trying not to choke with laughter at Monique’s re-telling of the previous night. She’d been gone for a short while, though apparently that didn’t prevent shit from going down.

“You should’ve seen Vanessa’s face when Brooke left with Plastique, oh my God, it was priceless,” Monique tells her, as enthusiastic as ever. Her ice cream melts more and more with every second that passes, but she can’t bring herself to care. Except when Monét tries to steal some of it, apparently. “Girl, had I known the bitch was that bold, I wouldn’t have invited her. I’d like her to still be alive by the end of the week.”

“Hey now, it’s not her fault Vanessa isn’t over Brooke,” Monét cuts in, “Plastique hardly knew any of y’all. She may not even know Brooke is Vanessa’s ex.”

Jaida hums in agreement, her mouth still full of ice cream. The three of them are staying at the same hotel, and they’re lucky enough there’s a good ice cream shop around the corner, so they decided to take the day off and just hang out. Not that the hangover allowed them to do anything else in the first place.

“Also, Vanessa’s a grown woman; I don’t think she goes around pitching fights because her ex’s over her, she’s better than that,” Jaida adds, wiping the rests of ice cream off her face.

Monét and Monique agree with her, and the conversation drifts to various topics, though Jaida notices they’re making an effort not to bring Crystal up. She appreciates it, because right now that’s a can of worms she rather not open.

It’s not that she regrets being with her, it’s more like she hates herself for dragging their thing for so long, and by the way Crystal bit her tongue and nodded wordlessly when she told her she rather stop this, she can tell she hurt her — at least to some degree, because the rest of the night she’d acted as if nothing happened and everything was cool. Jaida doesn’t know if it was faked or not.

Monét and Monique start to argue about something, probably about how they’re not going to be easy on each other just because they’re girlfriends now; they go way too fast for her to catch up, especially since she’s still eating her frost mint ice cream and can’t be bothered about their relationship right now — she hears about it on the daily, anyway.

Jaida brings the spoon to her lips when she looks past Monique’s shoulder, looking at the entrance of shop, and she freezes for a moment. She blinks repeatedly, until she knows for real this is not her eyes deceiving her; the same woman as last night is seating near the entrance with someone else, chatting and laughing and looking even prettier in the daylight.

She squints, trying to remember her name; Jen, was it? She’s pretty sure she heard her friend say it, but she can’t remember that well.  

Jaida pulls her gaze away when she realizes she’s staring, and tries to focus on whatever Monét and Monique are talking about. But soon she feels someone looking at her, and she steals a glance at the girl out of the corner of her eye; she finds that she’s staring back at her, but she quickly withdraws her gaze.

Jaida smiles against the spoon. She doesn’t question how is it possible she ran into her again, especially considering the island is big and the chances of seeing her again were slim. Perhaps it’s a coincidence.

“I’m telling you, ‘Nét, this bitch had an edgy phase!” Monique exclaims, tugging at Jaida’s arm, causing her to accidentally throw a good chunk of ice cream on her blouse. Monique stays still for a moment as Jaida fumbles with the tissue paper. “I’m sorry, girl,” she says, with her tone so high pitched and full of regret, Jaida finds it hard to get mad at her.

She sighs dramatically, leaving the tissues aside and standing up. “Don’t worry, sis, it’s no big deal. I can wash this, anyway.” She shrugs. “Though I’m expecting you to buy me a pina colada next time we hit the bar,” she teasingly says before leaving to the bathroom.

She can hear Monét’s laugh and the smack Monique gives her on the arm, pitching the blame for Jaida’s ruined blouse on her. Sometimes Jaida swears neither one of them knows the volume of their own voices.

She wets a tissue and gets the ice cream off her skin before it gets sticky. The bathroom is tinier than she expected, but at least there’s no one else.

Or so she thought.

“Sweet baby Jesus, Nicole, how did you manage to burn the eggs?” a voice speaks from one of the stalls, and Jaida jumps a little.

A woman comes out from one the three stalls, holding her phone in the crook of her neck as she washes her hands. Jaida stiffs a little when she notices it’s the girl from the beach. Jen (or Jan), apparently, remembers her too, because she stops for a moment when she sees her, biting her lower lip before speaking again.

“Nicks, just, don’t touch anything else from the kitchen. Jackie and I will come back in a moment — please don’t listen neither Gigi nor Brita, they’re as bad cooks as you, 'kay?” She hangs up and sighs loudly, drying her hands before putting the phone back in the pocket of her shorts.

“That’s quite an interesting daycare you got there,” Jaida comments lightheartedly, throwing the tissues to the trash. The woman chuckles, turning to see her.

“Keeping toddlers in their twenties alive is my passion,” she deadpans, playing with the hem of her shirt. Jaida laughs shortly. “I’ve heard they’re easier to take care of once they’re thirty,” she comments with a cheeky smile, making Jaida laugh again.

“I wouldn’t have my hopes up if I were you,” Jaida replies, checking herself in the mirror and making sure she’s wiped off all the ice cream

She sucks in a quick breath, looking back at the woman, who’s perched against the sink, texting someone.

“Hey,” she says, catching her attention. “This probably sounds crazy, but is there any chance you were at O'Ahu beach last night, looking for a ball, maybe?” Jaida wonders, and almost right away she sees Jen (or Jan) cheeks lit up.

“Oh, Jesus, I was hoping you wouldn’t remember me. That was so embarrassing. I’m sorry.” She covers her face with her hands and Jaida laughs softly, coming some steps closer.

“Girl, it’s fine, for real,” she assures her, and Jen (or Jan) slowly uncovers her face. The rosy tone in her cheeks makes her look cute. She bites her lower lip before continuing. “I did mean it when I said I can’t be mad at a pretty girl.”

Jen (or Jan) smiles sheepishly and laugh, tucking a strand of lose hair behind her ear.

“Well, I meant it too when I said you’re not so bad yourself. I didn’t mean to finger gun you, though.”

Jaida laughs, and for a moment she forgets she has to go back to Monét and Monique. They strike up a conversation, and Jaida learns that her name is Jan and not Jen, and that she blushes a deep shade of red whenever she compliments her in any way. Jaida thinks she’s the cutest girl she’s ever met.