#lowkey this is just an excuse for me to rant about how much it fucking hurts when i accidentally hit it tho

[halfbit]

some brief advice for characters with small scars from a head injury (from my specific experience) since i do see people give these types of scars to characters sometimes

mine is like this for reference:

specific info:

i didn't receive in-hospital treatment for it even though i lost consciousness i was kicked by a horse, the metal horseshoe is what did it it was a long time ago (over a decade now)

it doesn't effect me much day to day, it is always visible but it has become less prominent over time. certain expressions (anything eyebrow raising especially) make it very obvious.

it is physically raised and lacks pigment.

sensation wise, it used to itch but i haven't felt that for awhile now. if i pay attention when touching it, there's a slight difference in temperature from the rest of my skin. if i scrape it (even just lightly, like scratching with a fingernail) it feels like its bleeding even when its not.

if i accidentally hit it (i dont like doorways), it is extremely painful, it burns, my vision flashes white and i see stars, and it feels like its bleeding all over again of course. it feels like the irl equivalent of being stunned by an electric arrow. if your character has a scar like this, having them get hit on it in a fight is a good way to make them go down for a bit. the sensation also lingers for a decent amount of time afterwards, depending on how hard the hit was. the lingering feels like a heavy pulsing/throbbing, similar to a strong headache but localized on the scar. personally, it feels like even minor impacts can have a really strong effect still as long as its a pretty direct hit.

so yeah just my personal experience having a scar like this! i like seeing characters with similar scars but it often feels like it was just a cosmetic choice to show that they're tough. it's not something that is super high-impact for me, but it still has its effects, and when you aggravate them you can't really focus on anything else until it goes away.

[inmydr3amz]

I REALLY freaking enjoyed the benj Neilson one that you wrote... Is there any chance... Where benj Neilson's mom made dinner and the reader, her sister, and everyone else is there (pause for dramatic effect) and Bailey is flirting with benj (but lowkey subtle) and like improv from there😈😈😈 PRETTY PLEASE. 🥹

✮ THAT BOY IS MINE ✮ ​​

​🇧​​🇪​​🇳​​🇯​ ​🇳​​🇮​​🇪​​🇱​​🇸​​🇪​​🇳​

✦ synopsis: in which bailey crosses a line at dinner

⟡ content warnings: none just fluff!

✦ word count: 1343

✮⋆ a/n: I'm literally just using these as excuses to unleash my inner Bailey hater ⋆✮

p.1

Bailey has some fucking nerve. Her audacity honestly astounds you sometimes.

Here you are, sitting at the Nielsens' dinner table, and she, your fucking sister, is shamelessly flirting with your fucking boyfriend.

Granted, she doesn't actually know that Benj is your boyfriend because it literally only happened today. Like, your whole confessional make out session and "we should be boyfriend and gilrfriend" conversation happened a half-hour before Ms. Nielsen invited you to stay for dinner.

But whatever. You still think you have every right to be upset that she's so brazenly flirting with your boyfriend right in front of you. So what if she doesn't know you're dating now? It's still a shitty thing to do. She won't give him the time of day but she'll flirt with him shamelessly? Fuck off.

You're glaring daggers at her and you're pretty sure if you clench your jaw any tighter you'll break a tooth. Bailey is being all bashful and giggling like a fucking pick-me and it makes you sick.

"Oh, come on, Benj," she says all pouty, "don't quit musical theater. You were always so good."

You could deck her in the fucking mouth, the fucking bitch. The only reason Benj even considered quitting musical theater was because he thought it'd make him cooler and Bailey would be less embarrassed by him.

Benj shrugs, picking at his food. He's starting to get a little uncomfortable with her flirting but he doesn't know how to shoot her down now after years of reciprocating. "Maybe I won't, actually," he says because his mom was the one who brought up the fact that he was thinking about quitting. "The only reason I wanted to quit was because I thought it'd make me cooler or whatever. So, yeah, maybe I won't."

Bailey dismisses him with a wave of her hand, cutting into her chicken. "Don't worry too much about that. The nerdy thing is cute."

Oh. OK.

So the girl who's been embarrassed of being seen with him his whole life thinks his nerdiness is cute?

Even Benj is surprised. "You think so?" he asks, raising his eyebrows.

You swallow your anger and take his free hand in yours, resting them on the table so she can see. "Yeah, it is cute. I've always thought so."

Now he's blushing a little and you feel a swell of pride because you made him blush and she didn't. You give his hand a squeeze. She glances down and her expression turns sour.

Alyssa snorts. "You're both insane if you think Benj's nerdiness is cute."

Bailey laughs a little and shakes her head, amused, bur you scoff at Alyssa's comment, and you're pretty sure that's the difference between you and her.

"No, it's cute," she reassures him. "Honestly, you've always been cute, Benj. You're a total catch. Any girl would be lucky to have you."

Benj has to hold you down from fucking losing it on her. He caresses your hand with his thumb and leans over to whisper in your ear, "Just calm down, ok? Calm down . . . she doesn't know; you can't blame her."

You could go on a half-hour rant about the fact that you're not fucking fuming just because she's blatantly flirting with your boyfriend right in front of you but because she has the damn nerve to manipulate him and lead him in like this when she's just gonna toss him away after, but you hold your tongue and take a deep breath.

And then you fucking snap because she starts running her foot up Benj's pant leg and playing footsies with him. He jolts and chokes on his food.

His mom looks up. "Are you OK, sweetie?" she asks.

Benj is coughing and clearing his throat. You squeeze his hand. Well, more like death grip it.

"Could you stop?" you ask Bailey, staring through her. Your voice is even but anger drips off of every word.

"Stop what?" your sister asks innocently, taking a bite of her food.

"Flirting with my boyfriend. Could you stop please?"

And there it is.

Ms. Nielsen drops her fork and it clatters against her plate. Benj finally clears his throat and looks at with wide eyes because you agreed to tell everyone the news later, maybe during desert, and he definitely didn't want it out because of a fight between you and your sister.

Alyssa laughs, a shocked yet amused kind of laugh because what do you mean he's got two girls fighting over him right now? Two girls with eyes. And who are relatively intelligent. And know Benj.

The color drains from Bailey's face.

"Boyfriend?" she asks, and she sounds horrified. And pissed. A little betrayed, even though she has no right to feel that way.

"Boyfriend?" Ms. Nielsen asks, excited.

"Boyfriend?" Alyssa asks, laughing, disbelieving. "Really? You're choosing to date that? You?"

Benj rolls his eyes. "Oh, fuck off, Alyssa!"

"Benj, language!" his mom scolds. He turns red and sinks back in his seat. She turns to you and smiles. "So, boyfriend?"

You shrug, a shy but proud grin on your face. "It happened earlier today."

Bailey scoffs. "You're dating Benj?"

He squeezes your hand again, silently asking you to stay calm.

You push your food around on your plate. "Yeah, I am. So I'd really appreciate it if you would stop flirting with him."

"He was mine first!" Bailey blurts out. It's quick and she doesn't think it through. An uncomfortable silence falls over the table. The color drains from her face again. Benj's hand goes limp in yours.

You laugh. A cruel, bitter, humorless laugh. "He was 'yours first'? Are you fucking kidding me? Sorry, Ms. Nielsen," you add, giving her a quick glance. "He was never 'yours'. You never wanted him! You never liked him! You liked the attention he gave you! You lead him on and treated him like shit! Sorry again, Ms. Nielsen. You could've had him, but you didn't want him. That was your own decision. You're only upset because you don't have anyone to give you attention whenever you want it, anymore, not because you value him, even as just a person."

Bailey tongues the inside of her cheek. She's tense. "Mom and dad aren't home tonight. I'm in charge. When we get home, you're grounded," she says calmly.

Wow. OK. She's playing that card.

You pull your hand away from Benj's and stand. "Thank you for dinner, Ms. Nielsen. It was delicious. But I need a minute," you breathe, walking out onto the porch through the side kitchen door.

"You're grounding her over a boy? Not even a boy—Benj?" Alyssa almost laughs. "A little harsh, dude."

Bailey sucks her teeth and rolls her eyes. "Whatever. She had attitude."

Ms. Nielsen sighs. "She didn't have attitude, sweetie," she says softly, like she's talking to a child. "She's just upset that you're flirting with her boyfriend. It's . . . a little unfair to ground her for that."

Bailey just sulks in her chair.

"I'm . . . gonna go check on Y/N," Benj announces, desperate to get out of there and avoiding Bailey's eyes the entire time. He could not step out and close the door behind him quicker.

You're standing under the porch roof, watching the rain pour down in sheets, hands tucked into the pocket pouch of Benj's hoodie you're still wearing. When you hear the door creak open and shut close, you turn around, ready to keep arguing with Bailry, but soften up when you see him.

"I'm sorry. I ruined dinner," you start. "She was just pissing me off so much and I couldn't—"

Benj cuts you off with a kiss, hands holding your face. You're shocked at first but melt into it, hands going around his waist.

When he pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours and sighs dreamily against your lips. "No one's ever defended me like that," he whispers. "You're incredible."

You're dazed and a little lightheaded. "You're not mad?"

He laughs breathlessly, shaking his head. "I could never be mad at you."

He kisses you again.

[laceymorganwrites]

Small boob enjoyers

JJK edition

Megumi

he´s not really one to care for looks

but when it comes to you he really does become a pervert

is embarrassed about it and would never admit it to you though

especially in the beginning of your relationship he was so shy and couldn´t really help himself

you were so beautiful to him but your boobs...he hated guys who always stared at tits but how could he not?

he tried to do it secretly, so that you wouldn´t catch him but he was completely in his own head, just admiring the view

it made you shy as well, you thought he disapproved of the size of them and started hiding them

he gets very grumpy when you do that, he loves nothing more than to just watch you go about your every day, being so aware of the thing you´re most insecure about, that most people completely disregarded

he felt like he was the only one who truly appreciated your boobs and he revelled in it

when your relationship progresses further and you´re in private he will literally hold speeches about how beautiful you are, but you always have to laugh because he is a tad bit too serious about it

if you want to make him stop functioning just ´accidentally´ press against him from behind, you will see the way his hands twitch, in desperate need to touch and worship them

Getou

listen, listen. while we´re on the topic of worshipping this man takes the crown

Sugu isn´t only an average small tiddies enjoyer, he started the fucking fanclub for it

feels like a teenager again whenever you undress in front of him

gets so pouty when you tell him not to touch 

he doesn´t like it when you get too shy or embarrassed about your insecurities, it bores him

however he is understanding of it and helps you build confidence

but it backfires for him because you become way too fucking powerful

´you really should stop teasing me like this if you wanna walk tomorrow´

loves all the little things you do to drive him wild but will never admit that, his pride just gets in the way

while we´re on that

he´s fucking possessive, he loves your boobs because they´re his

he loves how he can just clasp them in one of his hands, the perfect size, he keeps repeating that

when he´s in a lovey mood he will whisper it in your ear all over and mark your chest

lowkey has a size kink so seeing how big his hands are in comparison to your tits makes him hard in an embarrassing short amount of time

loves to hug you from behind and just hold your tits

or whenever you´re cuddling, he will always play with them

literally will find any and every excuse to go shower with you

Gojo

ahahahahahhahaahahahahhahah

he´s such a fucking clown when it comes to tits

because he´s the guy who always boasts about how he´s a tits guy, the bigger the better

and he also is the annoying guy to rant about push up bras because ´it´s like a bag of crisps, half empty and full of air.´

´did you just call small tits disappointing?´ Sugu says and he´s never been so offended in his life

Satoru always made fun of Sugu because he adored small boobs so much and Gojo thought it was stupid

I mean he´s the strongest so he has to have the hottest girlfriend in the world

and surprise, he gets her 

just not in the way he would´ve thought

you´re not like that at all but why the fuck are you better than everything he could´ve ever hoped for? you throw him for a loop because this isn´t supposed to be like this

literally has his mouth open the first time he sees you naked

´you´re an angel´ he whispers, more to himself really

the best fucking thing is that he can rest his head comfortably without anything getting in the way

I mean he´s the clingiest bitch ever so he will use them as pillows all the damn time 

purrs like a cat and has this stupid grin on all the time

literally if you want to embarrass him just bring up the fact he thought small tits sucked at one point

Choso

´if I do not have a tiddie in my mouth at all times I will simply starve´

very adamant about his love for small boobs

lowkey overstimulates you a lot cause he can´t stop playing with them

loves to see how you react to his touch, he´s a fucking addict

also has an oral fixation so he will suck on and bite on your nipples a lot, like a lot lot 

definitely his favorite place to kiss after your lips

the type of guy to be a bit too informed about women´s health (but can one ever be too informed rlly?) and be super proud when you don´t have back problems because of your boobs

´you can jump around all you want, nothing ever gets in the way, isn´t that great?´

and honestly it´s so cute how excited he gets that your insecurities are out the window immediately

he was so shy and overexcited when you first got intimate that he almost passed out from touching your tits underneath your shirt

´they´re so soft...´ 

his eyes go so wide and loving whenever he gets to hold them and worship them

I hc that he loves playing video games after Yuuji got him into it and his favorite way to play is when you´re on his lap and he can rest his head on your shoulder, his hands will always touch your boobs in some way shape or form and for him there is nothing better

[crystallinestars]

Hello! I'm back for another rant :)

I was still thinking about Mihoyo's tendency to pair characters and play the ambiguity game to make more money and something I've noticed is that people will jump through sooo many hoops to defend the company. ''oh they can't be explicit because of censorship'', ''oh it's China, their culture is different!'' or even ''stupid entitled westerners always complaining about things they don't even try to understand smh 🙄''

Now, while I can agree that censorship and culture should be taken into account when talking about these games, I also feel like it's a bit disingenuous and lowkey patronising to chalk it all up to ''the Chinese are just all like that lol''

Like, why are we so vehemently defending a company that makes millions (if not billions) through ship teasing, as you've put before? Censorship does not change the fact that the development that characters get in these games (especially Genshin) goes out the window every other event or as soon as the main story is finished. And whenever I hear someone talk about censorship, I always think about Mo Dao Zu Shi (granted, the situation was different in its case so we should take it with a grain of salt) where its donghua and drama adaptations where indeed censored (but they were much more explicit than whatever's going on in Hoyoverse), yet the novel (the source material) had many MANY chapters with its two male leads going at it

I admit that I've been feeling a bit salty recently (because I feel like people only care about coding when it comes to the 'great' questions of ''OK but do these two men FUCK? How many times a day do they go at it and who's the woman in this ship??'' Meanwhile nobody ever talks about different dynamics, asexuality and aromanticism are seen as boring, and oh lord does bisexuality seem to be often treated as a trump card to say ''ok but this character is at least 50% gay'') and I also don't know that much about how everything works in China, but idk, I guess my point is that if they wanted to make ships canon, they WOULD (or could) find a way to do so

Anyway, your recent posts and asks also got me thinking and I guess I wanted to show you some support! I've seen your bio and I think it's a really smart move on your part to be clear on what you don't feel comfortable with from the get go. It can definitely be awkward when you have to tell someone that's just really excited to share their thoughts on something they enjoy that you're not interested and you'd rather not talk about this AT ALL. And it really does not help that popular ships tend to attract a lot of unhinged behaviour 😑 It's really refreshing to come across content creators like you, who are very clear in their boundaries and write such thoughtful fics

Once again, I hope you will be left to do your own thing in peace and that you'll keep finding ways and solutions for you to enjoy your favourite works without feeling alienated 💜

(And hopefully one day I will learn how to type short rants 😅)

Haha, short rants don't exist, Anon! It's perfectly okay to type long rants to me, I don't mind. If anything, I relish in them. As someone who rants and complains a lot myself, I welcome it when someone else does it. 😊 (I mean, just look at the length of my reply. I am not any better than you, dear Anon)

Lord, the "Mihoyo can't show explicit gay ships because of the CCP censorship" excuse grates on my nerves, as well. Censorship of homosexuality is definitely a thing in China, and it can sometimes be very horrible, but that's not what's stopping Mihoyo from making certain ships canon. They got way with a lot of lesbian ships in Honkai 3rd (though admittedly they had to tone it down once new laws were implemented, but the fact remains that at some point they were able to be blatant about their ships), and if we're talking actual coding, then Jeht being lesbian-coded is a thing that exists! If it was such a huge deal, I feel like Mihoyo would have either been way more subtle about it or not included these things at all.

It's just my personal opinion, but I'm certain that the reason Mihoyo doesn't make any ship canon is for the sake of making money. They need to sell characters, and the best way to do that is to allow players to enjoy characters the way they want. Assigning a specific sexuality or canon ship will crush the interpretations some players have about a character, and make that character unappealing. It would negatively impact their sales. Keeping things vague and only giving teases of the most popular ships seems to be the ideal marketing tactic for them. It panders to a lot more people this way and keeps most of them happy (however, the fact remains that they ignore a particular demographic of women, though that's a story for another time).

Regarding your reasons why people whip out the "coding" card... YOU ARE SO RIGHT! People only use sexuality coding as a way to "prove" their gay ship is canon and discredit any BG pairing. And they focus on things like one guy being muscular and the other more slender, and then assigning traditionally masculine and feminine traits to them, respectively. I could go on a whole separate rant about this topic, but I'll spare you the wall of text. Feminizing one of the guys in a gay ship is one of my biggest pet peeves, especially when it's OOC for the character.

One thing I noticed is that sexuality often gets used as a convenient tool to suit the needs of certain shippers instead of being used for actual diversity.

I can't tell you the amount of times I saw a sexuality tier list where the aromantic and asexual rows were treated as trash bins where people tossed the characters they didn't care about. There's no actual thought put into the sorting, and that's very unfair to actual aro and ace persons.

As for bisexuality... it's such a polarizing topic in fandoms. It's seen as a good thing when you have a canonical BG pairing, because then you can claim one or both are bi and therefore are also attracted to the same sex (as you said, they're "at last 50% gay" and can be shipped in gay pairings). However, if you have a non-canon BL or GL ship, saying one or both characters are bi is tantamount to treason. How dare you suggest they can be attracted to the opposite sex? That's erasing the gay representation!

Basically, bisexuality, much like the term "coding", gets treated like a tool that's allowed to exist only when it's convenient to a person, instead of as an actual sexuality real people have. I feel like bi, aroace, and pansexual people get shafted hard in fandoms in general.

Anyways, thank you for your support, Anon! I mentioned it in another post, but putting your likes and dislikes in the bio is a common practice in the Eastern part of the world, and I chose to copy that. I think it's a good way to meet people with similar interests while also letting those who have opposite interests avoid you. If the BL Anon had checked my bio first before following me, he could have spared himself some trouble haha. Sadly, it seems that many don't look at bios 😢

Thank you for your nice sentiments! I'm fairly confident that I won't be harassed, especially not in the reader-insert community, but I appreciate the thought! And hopefully I can find a way to combat the alienation... If not, then I'll simply uninstall both HSR and Genshin and find games that actually pander to me 😅

May you stay happy and free of harassment as well, dear Anon! 💚

[sillybloodyr4t]

hi yes hello I am back from the pits of hell

gonna yap a bit since I feel like yall might like to know where I've been

short explanation: at my aunts house and she wouldn't let me get on my laptop bc I was up at 2am on it and also I fucking hate it here

So erm. My aunt got upset with me bc I was up at 2am on my laptop. It was understandable I guess, but everyone usually goes to bed at midnight like what-

The next morning she told me to get off it, but then said "You know what? Let me see something real quick 😊😊😊" ...what kind of teenager who spends a shit ton of time on devices wouldn't be freaked out by that?? So I was like Ok... what do you want to see...

This BITCH. OH MY GOD. She kept gatekeeping what she was going to do, so OF FUCKING COURSE I was scared. I kept asking what she wanted to do with my laptop bc I kind of have trust issues with my devices (I dont trust people with my devices bc there is a high chance theyre going to see something and think its weird or whatever), and when I said that I had trust issues with this kind of thing she got OFFENDED because I didn't trust my 'dear aunt' who totally wouldn't take a look at just my pfp and ask me a million god damn questions. If she found out about this place she'd be 'concernend' and whatnot (She has a 'problem' with the LGBTQ+ pretty much).

She then said that the way I was acting was like someone who has an ADDICTION. She then ranted and shit about how heartbroken she was that I didn't trust her enough to randomly take my laptop and do whatever the hell she wanted with it. She said she "was just going to look at the clock." Yk she sure as hell wasn't acting like that was what she was going to do.

Not only did she do that shit, she's been making me stress the fuck out about school next year.

Basically, she's been saying "if you dont change this you're going to get bullied". I already know that I'm an ugly and wretched little human. MUST you rub it in??

She has also been commenting that the shit I wear AND WORE FOR A GOOD PORTION OF LAST YEAR made me look like a lesbian. This is the same woman who said an outfit I picked out for a dance made me look like an 'adult lesbian'. She has also said that "Lesbians don't like it when you dress like them, They will make you cry" BITCHHHHH DO YOU EVEN KNOW ANY LESBIANS??? TF??

ANDDD She even said at one point that I need to 'tone down my stomach'. EXCUSE ME?? I have woken up several times feeling nauseous because I haven't been eating breakfast. I HARDLY EVEN EAT BETWEEN MEALS HERE. I am LITERALLY not eating as much as I usually do!! What the fuck do you mean??

This isn't even the first time she's basically body shamed me.

My cousin did say that my aunt believes that all girls in high school need to be skinny because my cousin didn't really eat much and had some health issues when she was in high school. (she's a college graduate btw).

Might add more to this if I can remember what else she did so far bc Im lowkey lazy and I dont want to yap anymore

[typekiku]

TSUKIHIME FASHION REVIEW 4!!!!

hello hello everyone

*insert applause here*

i totally haven't been dealing with some severe writers block for this relatively improvised series of rants no way i just been uhh climbing a.... spiritual mountain! yes! that is it!

i strongly suggest everyone climb their own spiritual mountains it really helps clear *things* up

uh yea whatever

so today we will be returning to the much awaited tsukihime fashion review with the one and only CIEL so go whip up some good ole curry and read along for this rant breakdown of ciel's designs evolution throughout the years.

CIEL

just look at her for a second and reconsider your life choices? have you done your homework today? (if not please go do it thats very uncool) have you returned your library books? have you tied your shoe laces? thats the vibe im getting from her in this pic

suddenly she hits you with this look and its like ugh i could go to war for much less. i could take on maybe a dead apostle or two or even a dead apostle ancestor. sure i'd die but what is death in front of curry senpai amirite? im suuuuuuure she would appreciate that sentiment

on a serious note tho she actually is adorable as hell and i can't believe i only literally just noticed that. the hair especially is to die for.

Takeuchi bless his heart really nailed that cute older student vibe he so sought for

wait wrong pic

now THIS is raw as hell. pure peak 90s edge. i imagine takeuchi was literally sitting on the edge of a blade on the edge of a cliff on the edge of the world.... well theres one more edge joke here but ill leave it be point is this is edgy and i lowkey love it.

i used to feel somewhat indifferent to the design here especially concerning the tattoos which i think i still am. the biggest issue with the tattoos for me specifically the angel wings is simply they aren't symmetrical and thus look bad according to me but everything else is chefs kiss

i talked about this in the roa post but like wtf is wrong with roa man... first thing he does is strip down is bro ok? why does he do this? what does he gain? freak.

CIEL REMAKE

excuse the border im literally copy pastin here ANYWAYs yea idk how i feel about the remake ciel at all tbh to the point that i considered accidentally forgetting this section

its like they brought up her cuteness factor by 100 points in exchange of any edge whatsoever

she got sanitized damn it

SANITIZED

don't get me wrong i still find her cute but GODDAMN where is the edge? where is the allure? i bet she wouldn't ask "Glasses or no glasses" OH WAIT THEY TOOK THAT TOO!! why can't ciel have a good thing in peace... they took away the roa boner yall...

its kinda meh to me overall

again ignore the large size i cba to find a smaller pic rn

yk what she looks dope here so ill allow it. i may be feeling things rn actually its weird because i have never really been a ciel fan but now im gushing over her... huh strange

no comment besides omg hot

ANYWAYS thats all i have to say about ciel

i like her og design much better then the remake because i feel it was very hmmm distinctive is the word i would use.

the remake makes her look much more generic in a sense especially concerning the hair

overall i would say the remake really went for a slightly more generic look in the hair department and i aint really a tm boomer or anything but it is such a shame

thats all i have again so cya folks

remember to read tsukihime right the fuck now or else....

[forcebookish]

hello bestie, i'm trying my best to stay away from twt fights so i had to come rant to you since you're the only one who really #getsit. oh i hate the way things were dealt with in this episode like... i want to scream and punch a wall. it's actually for the best that mew acted the way he did with ray bc he would be in their stans' mouths forever if he didn't but i HATE IT SO MUCH. first of all, i genuinely hate ray so much. the way he treats EVERYONE is so horrible. it's nothing new that he knows no boundaries, but to keep seeing him crossing everyone's and no one ever calling him out makes me so fucking crazy - and then you see people calling out the others characters for less. wasn't people acting like top was the worst just two days ago for going after mew? what the fuck was that scene of ray invading sand's space and "oh just punch me" his self deprecating excuses pisses me off so bad it's unreal he really needs to be clocked. and then, the way he YELLED at mew for not wanting to have sex? oh we'd never hear the end of it if top had done that, by the way they still talk as if that first time they had sex he was manipulating mew somehow. like literally what the fuck was that?? mew should've knocked him down but i guess he's too good of a friend for that. and then he simply FORGIVES HIM and says what he was doing was just like top when EXCUSE YOU IT WAS NOT????? if we don't even touch the subject of that being AN ASSAULT, what happened between top and boston would never be similar to what ray was doing with mew and sand. he was purposefully going after sand and not giving a fuck about mew's feelings. and also the way he just showed up uninvited at sand's trailer like FUCK OFFFFF BROOO I WANNA SCREAM I HATE HIM SO MUCHHHHH HE'S GENUINELY THE WORST CHARACTER EVER AND THE WAY I KNOW PEOPLE WILL IGNORE EVERYTHING AND THINK THE SR SCENES ARE CUTE AND OH HE'S LOOKING FOR HELP 🥰🤩 oh my god i'm so stressed he once again got away with whining and saying oh im sorry and crossing everyone's boundaries and the writing lowkey just brushed this off again... imagine how tired we are imagine

oof i think i could go on like this for hours but that's a long message already sorry to vent at you but i had to put it out there... mwah

hi, friend!!! YEAH THAT WAS A LOT and i mean the episode, not you because you're RIGHT. you said everything on my mind oh my god. that was sooooooooo annoying.

and i really thought that top explained everything to cheum and she heard him out? i can't believe she's still pissed at him after he helped mew and bailed them out.

i guess the drama really is just going to gloss over the fact that top was assaulted and coerced??? while ray gets off scot-free despite going out of his way to sleep with someone else? after SHOUTING at mew for not sleeping with him? i can't even IMAGINE top ever doing that!!! did ray even apologize?

ray is such a fucking dirtbag!!! and we had to see mew apologize for something that was ray's fault AGAIN, forgive him AGAIN. it's fucking infuriating!!!!!!!

just

AND ALL THAT ONLY TO TAKE AWAY A TOPMEW RECONCILIATION WITH STUPID FUCKING BOEING

thanks for stopping by!!! i hope it helped you keep from twitter fights haha💗💗

[rens-denn]

Heeeeeeey~

Hi.

Not me sulking around in headspace whenever I was mentioned >:/

I was basically assigned to complain about last night and the shit that happened =_=

I'll still do it though, even if like. It's interrupted or whatever. Or uncomfortable because motherfucker is here because ✨weekend✨

So the essay will be under the cut :/

Motherfuckers wanted to try and rewrite the memories, btw. Which kinda goes against our instinct to preserve and archive shit, but ig that's why I'm here to rant and rave and riot >:/ Idk we write shit down a lot if it's important to us.

So yeahh! Time to fucking spill the bullshit.

Who really cares if it's unreasonable or not, bitch it's called fucking unhealed trauma.

So. B asked us if we want to go out to the store. Cool, right? Like, yeah sure fuck it, I don't have anything much going on. We were watching S and his friend (R at this point bc he's a recurring side character) play Sekiro before but ended up leaving to do some shit on the comp, so not like we were really doing much.

Told us to put on smth warm. First reaction: literally most if not all of our clothes need to be washed. But sure bud, I have *something* warm. So grabbed our secondary sweater, and then jacket from the cat-invaded room (plus anything else might've wanted or needed, like our wallet despite never using it :/)

Motherfucker was in call with his community friends and gf a while before wanting to go out, and we got ignored from small things to ask or mention or joke. Ok, cool... /s. Then the fucker says after like 5-10min of talking "btw I'm gonna reconnect on my phone" meaning he's STILL gonna talk to em when we leave!

Ok. Fuck you? MOTHERFUCKER WAS STILL IGNORING US AND HE TOOK SO LONG TO GET UP TO GO BECAUSE OF THEM!! LIKE BITCH YOU'RE THE ONE WHO INVITED US TO GO OUT. YOU'D THINK YOU'D TRY A LITTLE HARDER??? {Me when the narcissistic traits act up /silly/j}

Then it was little things for a bad start: couldn't find our earbuds (found after the whole fiasco/debacle/whatever); didn't know for sure where our gloves were and they werent in our jacket pockets (couldve been in our room and frankly I dont fucking like going in there with the cats so I wouldnt go back in if I could help it); and then B started to command us. EXCUSE YOU??

Honestly the commanding shit is the most infuriating fucking thing. Motherfucker is barely acknowledging we exist AT ALL, yet he acts like he has a right to tell us what the fuck to do? Mf when u say ur diagnosed bpd maybe you also have some other cluster b shit goin on (which might influence yk the reason for some of his panic attacks recently considering what he's said during em :/)(not that its like inherently a bad thing, I(we) probably got shit too; but like FUCK, lowkey kinda worried about how that shit would affect him without a therapist or smth to aid him through it for recovery)(if bro doesnt want to get better is a problem but like the panic attacks can induce/worsen his epileptic seizures for him. So I'd like for him to have less panic attacks? I'm sure he would too :/ I just don't know how the fuck he would want me/us to help through the panic. We don't want to fuck up more and hurt him or risk his health for this shit.) <-the excessive parentheses text was not intentional but like this is a rant and a vent and I can do whatever the fuck I want so fuck you.

Anyways. Yeah uh he told us to do shit as if it was our fucking job. As if he expects us to obey completely, to comply with that shit. Fucker is also autistic so like tone is hard for him and I'm just gonna assume thats for both speaking and listening. So yk when he says it how he does, it pisses me off! :)

Grabbed the fucking umbrella because we have to comply >:( and we dont know if it's raining or not. I didnt care to want the umbrella but he cared a lot. The umbrellas will cause issue later. When we went to put our shoes on he was ALREADY OUTSIDE OF THE APARTMENT!! DUDE WAS FUCKING TALKING TO THEM THE WHOLE TIME!! Ok!? So not only was he commanding us, BUT THAT WAS THE ONLY TIME HE SPOKE TO US OR ACKNOWLEDGED US AT ALL‼️

Shit's fucked up dude! He was already all the way down the stairs when we went out!! HE ALSO FORGOT THE KEYS AND FULLY EXPECTED US TO BOTH GET THEM AND HAVE THEM??? Bitch. This will also come to bite us both in the ass later. So I closed the door, no lock bc no key and also S and R were still home playing the game, they'd probably let us in. In hindsight I probably should've realized we couldn't get back in the building without the other key, but I was pissed off, you expect me to be rational when I'm being fucking ignored??? No, I'm a petty bitch >:/

The entire walk TO AND FROM THE STORE. WAS SHIT.

Motherfucker talked to his friends the ENTIRE time, and had his umbrella like he didn't care at all. Only time he seemed actually present irl was crosswalks, otherwise he was just enough to keep walking along like a fucking drone.

I either tailed him or was beside him when we were going TO the store, and any mix of front, behind, and beside when heading back. Mostly front because I did not like tailing him anymore, and being beside was HARD because UMBRELLAS. God, it was so FUCKING annoying because of the mandated spacing of it. That shit would hit trees, fencing, and (rarely) other people. More commonly our umbrellas would brush together which was annoying as FUCK.

IN store was also not great. Didnt know what we were getting, but it kinda felt like (and often feels like) he was being inconsiderate anyway. Because yeah he'll get smth with us in mind, but more in a both of us and not singular us way (him and I, not solely me (us)).

The reality is there's kinda no winning usually because either he asks us and we get pressured into a yes or no, or he asks us to pick something and just WATCHES, which has sent us into panic multiple times. // Ideally we would be able to get something by ourself, while he's looking away, but we also stress over the price of things, even if its just one single item we want--especially because HE is ALSO very conscious of how much things cost, especially since he's usually paying for it. Even if we could get something ourself, which is basically never gonna happen, we won't be guaranteed to ACTUALLY get it.

Skipping past the fact that even in store was annoying as fuck (walking simulator)(+ having to hold shit occasionally besides our umbrella :/), the no keys? Yeah that's next pretty much. B called S to get let in, only to find out the dude left with R to go somewhere (later found out is was apparently a restaurant; reason is probably related to their friend's wedding that they went to earlier in the day {congrats to them!!}).

Backdoor was the option to get in. I was basically trying to lead B, who had fucking ignored me to see if S would explain instead. Bullshit. Then he fucking TURNED TO GO TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BUILDING THAT DIDNT HAVE A KEYPAD TO GET IN??? Fucker ignored me!? He's so fucking lucky someone left the building on that side, because we were able to get in far quicker + easier. I'm lowkey pissed off about that now but whatever. We got in.

To make this section a *tad* shorter: Apartment was also locked, naturally. B proceeded to continue spouting commands, asking if my data was decent and then telling me to install Uber, and to give him my fucking passcode. I was beyond frustrated and we broke down, which he was trying to get me to suppress essentially, which is COMMON AND STILL BULLSHIT!! Fucker has no regard for my feelings and would rather I didn't have them, I swear. Need to take a cleaver to his throat.

He took my phone and went to get keys from S, and left his phone that was at 3%. All I could do was check the time (and answer one call from him) so safe to say it was a hell of a lot of nothing to do.

This is when talk of rewriting memories happened, by the way. We'll say whoever is 'host' or the mask or whatever, which is probably NOT 🌼, is the one who suggested it. We needed to bide our time and, frankly, wanted to just be done with everything. It started with just. "Internal conversation with a blank slate fragment" type shit. Which, frankly, NOT GOOD? Like I get you desperately do not want to have these feelings and experiences affecting you right now, but maybe don't try and intentionally split or force shit on an unsuspecting fragment??? [memory alteration convo was trying to make it so we actually just went out alone and did stuff, to help feel more independent. Which has plot holes because nothing would be in character for B, but the decision with that was "ah well just forget about that," just act like we did it solo and were fine. Dumbasses, honestly.]

👑 was mentioned at one point, and he was kinda just in his study ig??? It was thought up and therefore made as a place for him to sit and read or write or whatever. To exist. I was mentioned too, and nearby, and was told to essentially go away (it was nicer than that because we're trying NOT to be assholes to ourself; to me especially. Just a "we need space" thing, which is true.) I know it was just so we didn't dwell on the issues that afternoon, btw. Eventually 🌼 was being brought to front, anyways, because. Well. Could use some positivity. I was the one who got off call with B afterall, when he mentioned he got hurt, so the idea was "he's gonna be in a worse state than he was before, and it probably isn't good to still hold a grudge and be mad/bitter when he's here and hurt, so if we can just. Pretend things are fine, then it'll be easier." That was the thought process, essentially, so they were in front (and *sorta* regressed?) and trying to be alone. Couldn't afford emotional bleed, so they tried grounding themself more. I left pretty much, because my memory of it is pretty damn fuzzy for some stuff (atleast offhand?). Like ALMOST blackout levels of fuzzy.

We kept note of the time, and it took about an hour, as opposed to a possible two or more hours, and we finally got inside. Put away the stuff he bought. Did have to help him up the stairs (atleast to stand) and had him using the umbrella(s) as a cane so he would have an easier time moving around when he did. Stuff immediately after that is pretty... wiped, for me. I know it wasn't ME acting anyways so meh. Makes sense. I know we made a burrito tho, or one for us both since he couldnt get up.

Blah blah, blurry time-space, eventually R and S got back to playing their game and we watched. Mainly spent a lot (and I mean a LOT) of time helping B through his epilepsy/seizures and stuff. We ended up having multiple panic attacks past halfway through it, which sucked ASS. Atleast it got us sympathy from B (who wanted to try and help us through but really we can regulate on our own fairly well so it was kinda pointless).

^ This is what was mentioned on collective main btw ^

SO YEAH YESTERDAY WAS PRETTY FUCKING SHITTY AND WE GOT REALLY FUCKIN HURT EMOTIONALLY AND MENTALLY AND SHIT BUT YKW ITS FINE BECAUSE NOW I'VE WRITTEN IT DOWN AND WE CAN LET OUR BRAIN FORGET IT NATURALLY IG IDFK

We end up forgetting a lot of events and details but not the hurt as it piles up. Sometimes specific details can be recalled. But overall we just remember "you hurt me multiple times" p much. It's whatever. The good thing about journaling and shit is that we have a record of it somewhere, atleast.

Ok, I've said my piece, I did the stupid fucking intentional rant/vent thing that was asked of me. Praying we dont get a headache, and that it isn't bad if we do.

[nsk96]

Rant:

Lowkey feel like I'm watching my body slowly deteriorate because I'm getting increasing muscle weakness after 4 years of not working out (weight-lifting included). So much muscle weakness that I feel like my legs can barely carry me across a 10-minute walk; and my bag with my laptop and lunch weighs down my shoulder, my upper-body muscles can barely hold it up. Not to mention the muscle soreness I get at the end of each day now while I'm at this rotation.

And it's not like I haven't been active. I've been on my feet everyday since May, throughout my compounding rotation and retail rotation. I even felt like I was getting stronger at some point, but my health seems to have plummeted recently.

What bothers me even more is that I wouldn't be in this predicament if my mom let me go to a gym. Our deal when we decided to move here was that we get rid of our weight-lifting station (because it won't fit in the new house. I used it back in 2019. I became strong enough to lift heavy boxes during the move) and to make up for it, we'd join a gym and go for walks. Surprise, surprise, promises were broken.

We didn't do the gym because she deemed it "unsafe" (we just made it barely halfway through the parking lot. Didn't even go in before she backed out). And well, because I'm dependent on her financially I couldn't go, despite asking so many times the past 4 years. She'd make excuses like "you don't have the time" and emphasize how unsafe it is. But when it comes to other things that she deems important, she tells me "you need to make the time"...make it make sense. "It's not safe" and "you don't have time" seems to be her arguments for every time she doesn't want me to leave the house (like when I want to go to the school library to study over the weekend).

It's interesting though that she was actually opposed to me weight-lifting because she thinks bulking up would make me look too masculine and she would say that muscles don't look good on women, and go on to say my shoulders are already really "broad like a football player".

Today, I mentioned how much pain I'm in and said I need to workout. She said, "what's stopping you from working out?" What a fucking joke. All we have is that glider thing and a treadmill which won't do anything for my muscles. I'm already walking a bunch everyday, up and down stairs, between the pharmacy and the residents' room for daily rounds. To the outpatient pharmacist's office downstairs. If cardio was what I needed, I get enough of it.

She loves saying that I need to use the glider because it "works out the whole body." Trust me, it doesn't. It works for her, because she sits for her job all day...at home. Then when she's done with work, she puts her feet up to watch tv. She does chores intermittently. I told her the glider wasn't going to work and she said, "how is the treadmill going to help?" I didn't even mention the treadmill but she felt the need to bring it up because I always preferred the treadmill for my cardio (by the way I can't use either of them because they're set up in the garage; a one-way ticket to heat exhaustion). I told her I need to work out my upper body, especially work on the muscles for posture, and she finally said to go to a gym if that's what I need. tf. Then she goes on to say, maybe the one in ___ if it's safe.

"If it's safe". I'm so fucking done, because I know nowhere is safe in her eyes, and I'll just be stuck at home and become her. I'm convinced she wants me to become her, projecting her own insecurities on me all the time, and trying to keep me home. Her telling me to workout is just a mockery.

Well, it seems to be working. The negative voice in my head is hers. She's that voice. Imagine being your own kid's first and only bully.

Also, just a side note: the way she talks about other women is disgusting to me. Talking shit about how they're dressed, or what kind of plastic surgery they got, or judging their confidence like "she thinks she's all that". I know it's her own insecurities showing up, but I hate it so much, because it was because of her saying those things that I viewed myself and other girls negatively growing up. It took me so long to rewire my brain to think positively of other women who look/dress "better" than me. Undo the negativity she instilled in me, and still tries to instill in me. My own friends, she talks shit about. I become more of a girls' girl every day, but I know my mom will never be one. Maybe it's because of my narc dad, or maybe it's her own internal misogyny. I'm still working on viewing myself better but she's made that difficult my whole life. The part that kills me is that I don't think she even realizes what she's been doing to me, but if I were to point it out, she'd just get defensive and/or deny it.

[lqfiles]

girl… wtf… wtf… wtf… wtf… wtf… wtf…

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK DUDE CAN YALL HEAR ME YELLING AT HAECHAN TO STFU OR ELSE I’LL KISS HIM? CAN YOU GUYS HEAR ME ROOTING FOR THE TWO OF THEM TO KISS AGAIN LIKE MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT? yeah, yeahhhh

what is wrong with you? 😭 WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? (i so needed this)

i needed haechan so down bad he’s questioning HIS WORTH AS A MAN (no but his little rants were funny lmaooo) because he’s writing y/n a letter and doing some arts and crafts 😭 this man is not even just down bad but he’s horrendously down bad and guess what? i support ✊🏼

UGHHH LEMME GIVE YOU A SMOOCH ON THE FOREHEAD BC BEST SMAU WRITERRR right here! lemme re-read the new update again and I’ll come back to freak out hehehehe

BUT AGAIN DUDE SO GOOD imma need to freak out about this to my bf bc haechan remembers 😭😭

- 🫧

(also, do not worry 🫡 i did take off so much time off social media and grieving with my family. it’s been a hard couple of days, but we feel much better knowing that hey, we loved bella a lot, we gave her a good life, and yes, it sucks she left the world in a manner we didn’t expect her to, but she was enough. and we’re just happy to be able to share our memories with that stinky with others so thank you to you and if any other anons read the updates, thank you for reading. we will get her ashes tomorrow 🥲 and i just hope wherever she is, she’s biting me and napping next to me while i read the new updates)

(another also, my mom is still in contact with bella’s mom’s owner and the owner bella was supposed to go to (IDK if i shared the story, but bella wasn’t supposed to be ours 😭 her brother was. bella was supposed to go to owners in mexico, but my mom got the wrong dog when she went to go pick bella’s brother, and we got bella instead), and they are kind enough to come to our house with bella’s family)

(we also found out!! bella’s sister’s owner IS OUR NEIGHBOR? so my mom has been in contact with her too and we’ve been getting a lot of support. we will eventually get another dog, not rn, but when we’ve healed and we know what to do and what not to do now. bella really was a treasure and thank you for reading her stories 🤍)

(WOAH THAT WAS A LOT EXCUSE MEEEE)

LMFAOOOO YESS LETS GO FOR THAT SECOND KISS!!!

this haechan is desperate LOWKEY like he’s not admitting it in front of anyone yet, just wait till he loses his girl fr fr and is begging her to talk to him again ON MAIN (i have a thing for pathetic men) like him going out of his way to decorate the letter and all and even getting paper cuts, HE WANTS HER….

i’m happy to know that you’re rather focusing on the nice times with her instead of the grief you’re experiencing, she was such a silly cute dog i loved her even if i never met her irl!!! AAAAAHHH that’s honestly so nice of them i can’t believe you’re only meeting them now 😭 i bet they’re just as silly as bella awww. and that’s a crazy ass coincidence HOW DID YOU GIYS NOT KNOW OMGG like her sister was across the street the whole time plss 😭 i agree btw!! take your time healing first instead of rushing, you don’t want it to feel like you’re attempting to replace her!!! AGAIN TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER RN MY LOVE <333

[legendoftherisingtide]

Let me bring a different perspective. (This is me recontextulizing an old rant)

I didn't like Tallulah at first. (I have warmed up to her since, but this is why | didn't/perspective of why many don't)

She was just there so Wilbur didn’t fuck off because he has other things to do. She is literally Wilbur but as an egg. She looks like him. She likes music because Wilbur likes music. She is just pandering for him and his fans.

She is overly wholesome and cutesy because if she had even an ounce of interesting traits, Wilbur would just leave her behind. She has kind of developed more depth as of late and actually felt more like an actual human but before she had to stay in this uninteresting role because if she wasn't this perfect cutesy baby, Wilbur wouldn't care.

She puts signs down that's says all the right things and only tells him how much he loves him or how much she wants him to stay with her or how he shouldn't leave her for others.

Like holy shit that isn't interesting and is such bait. And lowkey manipulative.

And everyone got caught in it.

(NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT THOUGH IF YOU LIKE SOMETHING DO NOT LET ME TAKE THAT AWAY FROM YOU, SHE IS LITERALLY MEANT TO BE ENDEARING AND LOVED SO DONT LET A RANDO ON THE INTERNET MAKE YOU FEEL BAD.)

I don't much care for the lore of Talullah be like I said before, I didn't care much for her, but ig yeah it is ableist in that context. But tbh it's for fun. This is all for fun. And I don't care about this aspect. I have asthma and I like that they used that as an excuse for why she lags but I don't think people who have a problem with her aren't looking at her as a child but an adult with an admin who is trying to make you feel sorry for her.

Using disability as a tool to make you feel bad when in reality it's a girl on a laptop.

My problem is that because these eggs have communication on their first day (the signs), it makes the endearment to them easier and fast.

But with, for example, Bobby or Juanaflippa, they became fan favourites because their personalities shined through even without communication. We fell in love with them because they had to show us who they really were.

Talullah's admin(s) can speak freely and benefit from updates but in retrospective, it hinders the special bond that became of parent and child. Before, it was a relationship where the parents had to really try to understand their egg and the egg had to show who they were despite the language barrier, that barrier being nonverbal.

Talullah basically guilt trips Wilbur (and his audience) into keeping her and then has to continue this by constantly trying to be endearing.

Like imagine being guilt tripped into staying in a server even though you already have plans doing what you love. And now your entire fandom calls you a deadbeat dad and is upset you don't care for your egg child when you ALREADY HAD PLANS and everyone KNEW THAT and they STILL chose to give him an egg he clearly didn't want but loves anyway. And Tallulah's admin knows all that and still chooses to make Wilbur feel bad for her even though it is literally not Wilbur's fault.

The other eggs, by the time they get signs, are now bonded to their parent and have a dynamic with people. So they can then be funny and be interesting and the signs allow them depth for the actions from before. Now that nonverbal communication is the baseline and when they need to speak, they can.

Tilin for example could now have emotional moments with characters because these people have cared for her even before she could actually tell them that she loved them. They gave flowers to those they loved. He communicated that love without saying a word. And people loved them for them, not because they told you their tragic backstory and constantly told you that they loved you.

They had an uncle and loving caretakers. They had a single parent that didn't seem to care for them. It sounds like a very familiar character.

However, Tilin worked for that. She was interesting and funny through nonverbal communication but also sweet and affectionate. She had bombs and hilarious moments with Quackity and Juanaflippa.

Everything that they put on signs exemplifies these connections she already has. This fits far better and aides the storytelling. Tilin has context to why he says the things he says and when he does say sweet or cute things, they mean far more and actually feel earned.

Dapper is my favourite example of signs done right.

That egg says the funniest things and has an amazing dynamic with their parent. They are not over the top, unless it is appropriate, and you can tell that that egg has characteristics outside of being whatever flat, boring and unrealistic thing everyone wants them to be. Like them and Bobby are probably my favourite sign users because the stuff they say fits into the character they played before they could speak.

l've said it before as a joke but I really mean it, Juanaflippa made her way into her hearts with backflips and water buckets. She didn't need a sign to be fun. She didn't need to talk to be interesting. She could be nonverbal and be loved. I have bias towards her in a way but I also love all of the eggs. They all had their "thing" ya know? Something memorable and unlike anyone else. Like Leo has their camera and building and being a nepo baby, Bobby has their painting and violence, and even Trump got to have characterization before his untimely death. And Tallulah is a carbon copy of Wilbur.

Like Chayanne has their best moments when they're just being themselves which is protecting and prior to that arc, having funny chaotic moments with parents who want to protect him. And they have become such a fan favourite as they've chosen a strong interesting character path to go on.

I really don't like Tallulah's sometimes because she kind of wants to make you to feel bad ya know? Like I remember watching Wilbur's introduction to Tallulah and him continually saying that he can't have time for her and then her insisting that he needs to be her parent and him cracking because of how cute and helpless she is.

However I think she has gotten the nonverbal communication down now. I see clips and her body language is great. I think the initial way she approached people to be endeared to her was... yeah kinda over the top, but I can say she is doing an amazing job with the subtleties now. And l've warmed up to her.

But it just took a while. Just like with the regular eggs.

She falls back into those 'feel bad for me moments’ from time to time: I personally didn't like that she made Forever cry on stream and everyone clipped it and started shouting from the rooftops his own personal story. I don't know if she knew how close to home her lore would be for him but I think it was really upsetting to see someone's pain and past be dredged up like that. Especially since he wasn't comfortable showing it on stream.

I like that Tallulah has started moving away from centering her life around Wilbur because in a lore perspective, it's growth and in a meta perspective, it's taking the burden off of Wilbur and allowing her to move away from making everyone feel bad for her all the time.

I don't care that they have to make accommodations for her. If she was disabled in real life, those accommodations are deserved and rightfully hers just as they are in canon. But what I do care about is the way she makes people feel bad for her for a situation she canonically made. I know I keep coming back to the signs but she literally guilt tripped him into adopting her even though he said she should go with someone else. And now she's sad that he isn't there.

I hate that.

I dislike that they made her look exactly like him. I dislike that she picked the exact interests of Wilbur to make connection. I dislike that she tried so hard to make Wilbur like her. I dislike that she was meant to keep Wilbur on the server when he had important things planned doing what he was passionate about. I dislike that every single thing about her is to make you feel bad or say aww.

Because she doesn't need to do that. Because she can be loved and cared about without that.

I watched her play her flute to blue lobsters and it was the cutest thing. I watched her listen to people talk while she crouches in front. I watched so many cute moments and interactions that weren't pushing in your face how cute or sweet it was. It just was. Which is how actual humans act; how children's cute moments actually are.

Her candidly being her is all she ever needed to be loved.

And there's a reason she wasn't that at the beginning.

i noticed that some ppl in the fandom dislike Tallulah. Which lead me to analyzing that tallulah’s the kind of character that a lot of viewers get annoyed with because she is too nice.

like if I were to give another example of a character like Tallulah, I would say she’s like Tohru Honda from Fruits Basket. And Tohru is a character that was often disliked in the early days of the fandom series bc she was said to be too much of a Mary Sue Character, when in reality her character has just a lot of empathy, and her morals always aligned with actively choosing to be kind to everyone, regardless of their background.

I think it’s interesting that this is a pattern in a lot of media, and it’s so interesting to see when people dislike the nice characters.

[l0sercat]

Slashers with a S/o who is a metalhead/gothic who enjoys horror and true crime

Ngl I kinda inserted myself into this a bit. I just relate lmao :v

@raven-the-cryptid I saw the one post and I had motivation to write lmao 💀 I gift you this mess 😻 (Lowkey kinda proud of myself for writing this in a few split up hours, kinda pulled these out if my ass :p)

Bo Sinclair

A fucking prick I'll tell you that, he'll tease you soon much. He'll make fun of you and say he's joking. He doesn't really mean anything by it but he just can't help it. He thinks your love for true crime is weird but hey like he has room to talk. He enjoys seeing your face light up talking about it. He will never admit it but likes the way you dress.

Vincent Sinclair

He enjoys your aesthetic. If he could he'd dress in a similar way. He enjoys the metal music and will let you listen to it if you guys are chilling in the basement together. He just loves to draw and has a full sketchbook dedicated to you. He never gets bored of drawing you because your just so fun.

Brahms Heelshire

He's a little intimated by you. At first he's weary and a bit judgemental but warms up. He hates scary movies but since it's an excuse to cling onto you he'll push through it. He loves to hear you talk about your love for horror and music and can and will fall asleep during your rant not because he's bored but because your voice soothes him.

Billy Lenz

A bit curious but thinks your the prettiest piggy he's ever seen. (Please don't take offense to that)

He loves/likes you regardless but your music...yeah maybe make sure your keep it low. He's very sensitive to sound and doesn't like the loud music. Don't get me wrong he isn't judging you but with how loud and all the screaming reminds him of his past. Now your love for horror doesn't faze him and will listen to podcast of crime with you if you either play with his hair or let him play with your hair.

Bubba Sawyer

He loves it!! It's just so different than what's he is used to and fucking loves it! He only See's the regular country get up but seeing someone dress like that makes him squeal in excitement. Please do her makeup and dress them up like you please! He wants you to paint his nails like yours and generally wants to dress like you. It's not all the time because your in Texas and it's hot as hell and he has work. Since his brother listen to similar music he likes metal as well and will gladly listen to it. As ironic as it is he isn't that big fan of horror. He jumps a bit at the scares but will sit threw it.

Michael Myers

Bro is the embodiment of evil and has been through hell. So he isn't fazed nor has the time to care. Your music doesn't faze him he actually enjoys it and if he zones out and you catch him off guard you'll see him nodding his head. He watches horror movies with you and will silently judge the 'survivors' with you.

Charles Lee Ray

He dated Tiffany before soooo. He finds it hot and loves it and will slap your ass. He wants you to be his partner in crime since you know so much. If your uncomfortable or don't want to then that's fine but expect to see a ton of photos of the crime. He loves your taste in music and while you have a smoke sesh he will blast the music.

[hanji-is-life]

before I disappear and start working on my pieces—

just thinking about toxic Bakugou after chiyo sent me this song a few weeks ago.

Toxic Bakugou who’s literally a walking piece of shit with a dick that could make a girl go crazy

Lowkey doesn’t give a flying fuck about your feelings at times, especially when he thinks you’re overreacting. will not hesitate to tell you that you’re overreacting, either.

Thinks it’s hot when you get mad or jealous. so he flirts with other girls, meaninglessly since he really doesn’t want shit to do with other people that aren’t you. it’s just fun seeing you get all pissy and cuss both him and the girl out before stomping away. also an excuse to watch how your ass jiggles with every stomp.

Don’t even attempt to make him jealous, though. It’s literally hell on fucking earth.

“Thought that shit was fuckin’ cute, hah? Rubbin’ all up on him, like I’m not fucking standing here? I’ll show your slut ass fuckin’ cute.”

You two are breaking up literally every other week. Well, you’re breaking up with him every other week. To him, y’all have never broken up once in this 4 year long relationship. Just some ups and downs, that he likes to call them. Piece of shit—

The moment you send him a long ass paragraph explaining why you guys are toxic for each other, he turns his read receipt on and leaves it open for five minutes, before sending,

“you’re fuckin rapping. I’ll be over in 5. get naked.”

Again, a piece of shit. You listen and get naked—but not without a fight first!

He loves it, though. Loves when you snatch the door open with a scowl and your mouth already running. How easy it is to just push past you into your place, grab a beer and plop down on the couch like he owns the place. Loves how you stand over him and berate him and talk all exaggeratedly with your hands and expressions and tones. Loves how all he has to do is stand, back you into a corner, let that lil rant die in your throat, before he has you right where he wants to.

No matter how much you two break up, everyone knows not to believe it. But god help anyone who tries to talk to either of you when you’re broken up having your ups and downs

The makeup sex is always more than worth it. It’s something about toxic dick that gives you the best orgasms and highs you’ve ever had.

“I wanna break up with you. For real this time, Katsuki. We’re not healthy for each other.”

“Just got my dick pierced. Wanna come see it and take care of me?”

Finally; he’s a piece of shit. if that wasn’t clear already.

[isa-ghost]

How do you hold onto hope that anything will be done with Anti or any of Sean's Egos? I fell out of love for JSE and his content about three years ago due to.. I guess just growing up? But I used to check back in from time to time because he used to promise that "Big Thing's" we're coming for his Egos. (Mind you this was before the pandemic took full effect so there wasn't that as an excuse.) I just recently checked his channel and saw he has taken a step back (Good for him and his mental health if he needs that!) from making content. Did he burn out? Is he ever going to do anything with the Ego's? I don't even know why I care at this point? I guess I just want logical answers and you are the smartest JSE fan I know? Anywho. Sorry for the rant. I'll get out of your asks. 🌶

Oookay unpacking this ask time.

Anon thanks in advance for sending this because as feisty as I felt at first, it helped me get out a lot of things I've wanted to say in this regard for a Long Long Time so, yeah. Thank you.

1. Personally I don't like the term "grew up" in reference to CCs or much of anything tbh, because you're rarely too old to enjoy the things you love. But I get what you mean regardless. Just wanted to plop out my take on that topic in general. Never think you're too old to enjoy something harmless though. :)

2. I've been shaky on hope lately, to be honest. He's not been doing a ton of videos in general lately, minus some strays and the Deltarune Chapter 2 series (I genuinely didnt expect him to play it bc he hadnt played another recently released big game I wanted to see him play but he did, and I'm super grateful bc it was killing me lowkey). Which obviously the decision not to make a ton of content at the moment is okay. He's very burnt out, he's been having severe health issues both physically and on/off mentally. The lack of content and low energy he's had lately is just disheartening if that's the right word idk. BUT!! We DO have a MASSIVE Thankmas stream coming in December to look forward to!

I miss him and some days I get kinda,, idk, bitter? About the radio silence. But unlike a lot of people that have been in and out of the JSE Community between 2018 to now, I respect his health and the fact that he's a whole ass human being and has a life and other things he is more than free to do instead whenever the fuck he wants. TLDR I think have better critical thinking skills than some people on here and Twitter lmao. And the last few years have been shit, both in the world and- at least on here -in the community (dare I mention the t*ablogs). Though lately the community is quiet and very very peaceful and enjoyable again. At least in my corner here.

The thing is, I'm not and was never here ONLY for egos. I love Sean and everything about him to bits. He made one of the worst few years I had in the 2010s infinitely more bearable and gave me an explosive amount of inspiration for creativity that I'd not really experienced before. And friends I'll never let go of.

I miss ego content. I want it to keep going. I'm extremely sad it might not continue. But as an artist, I know why he was promising big things once upon a time. When you're a creator and you have a story like this, you want to flesh it out. The motivation and muse is high. People are excited and you want to deliver. The difference with Sean is that he wanted it to be as high in quality as he could push for after all our excitement and incessant thirst for more. And his plans involved a budget and more than just himself and none of it was his main focus. It was a fun side project.

HOWEVER, big projects like this get interrupted by life, smaller projects, distractions and other things. Sean got SLAMMED by all of the above non-stop these last few years and then hit a bad burnout. I think that through it all, he hit that dreaded wall some artists with big, long term plans like the egos story hit and lost motivation. It got overhyped. Pressure got too crushing. Any plans he made to FINALLY continue the ego storyline got murdered by Covid more than once (which.. personally the term "excuse" sounds kinda shitty in reference to that imo but I digress). Making promises only to have outside variables beyond his control break them was killing him, so he just stopped promising. And people who have no respect or patience got annoying and some got straight up inexcusably vulgar, immature and hateful before dramatically fleeing the community in a tantrum like he'd personally come to their house and betrayed them. It was infuriating to watch go down.

But no matter how much it might hurt or be disappointing to see it die out, I'm here for Sean and his journey no matter where it takes him. I'm not sitting here being a stubborn beacon of anything. And I also recognize and (no matter how reluctantly) respect that we aren't OWED ego content. Never were. It was not an obligation no matter how many promises he made or how much hype he stirred up. And to be fair? We drove the hype a million miles further than he EVER did and we can't blame him for that. I hate the people who do. I'm grateful for the ego content we got and I'll cry if we ever get more. But if it's done, it's done and we just have to accept it. I, as sad as I am to, accept it. And we can always make our own.

And finally- thanks for the compliment. Idk if I'd say I'm the SMARTEST but that means a lot either way. :')

I hope this gave some answers even though it came out more of a vent/rant and PSA??

Obviously any JSE followers and mutuals please feel free to reblog this. But don't start any fights, not that I really expect there to be any?

[marvelouspeterparker]

tom making you wear have a vibrator in all day

this was lowkey inspired by this audio as well 

at first you thought it would fun to try this out with tom, a little sexy you know...sneaking around in front of everyone. but this—this was just torture. and tom had no mercy for you whatsoever.

you had just sat down for dinner after an entire day of tom messing with the settings on your vibrator. your panties were soaked, you were so horny you could barely focus your eyes and yet tom didn’t seem to care. in fact, he was enjoying this. way too much.

“let’s see,” he said, half of his face hidden by the menu in front of him. “hm how about this one...”

before he even finished his sentence you felt the toy’s setting jump by one level. you pressed your thighs together and took a deep breath, trying your best to compose yourself.

he glanced over at you, setting the menu down and putting the controller down on the table for anyone to see. your eyes widened and you felt your face heat up at the thought that anyone could see what you were up to if they simply glanced over and recognized the device. but you hate to admit that it also turned you on.

tom raised his brows, looking oh so innocent, “not feeling well, darling?”

you bit back a snare, “i’m great, thanks.”

“you sure? you seem a little bothered, honestly.”

you stared at him silently. 

he smiled sweetly at you, “well that’s good. only want the best for my girl.” he licked his lips as he looked you over, his fingers mindlessly grazing the toy in front of you, teasing you.

your eyes were barely taking in the words on the menu and food was the last thing on your mind. you felt hot all over, especially between your legs. you just wanted to get home as soon as possible.

tom interrupted your mental rant to tell you that the waiter was on his way back. just as he arrived at your table, tom slipped the controller into his lap. you felt your heartbeat quicken when his hand stayed hidden under the table.

“i’ll let you order first, love.” he winked and it took everything in you not to kick him under the table.

you closed the menu and stared up at the waiter. you cleared your throat and started out strong, but as soon as the vibrations accelerated you gasped and you swear you saw tom bite back a smile from the corner of your eye. you excused yourself and rushed out your order as fast as you could, leaving tom to order his meal and the waiter was on his way.

you took a sip of your water as you glared at tom across the table. “you’re enjoying this far too much.”

he licked his teeth as he stared you down—he was looking at you as if you were his prey. “don’t pretend like you don’t like this too, princess.” he leaned forward, “don’t act all high and mighty when you’re the one with a toy shoved up her pretty little pussy, pulsing and wetting her panties while all these lovely people eat their meals around us.” you held your breath at his words and he sat back, tutting teasingly, “naughty little thing you are.”

you straightened up in your chair and set your water down as you looked anywhere but at him, “whatever...” you muttered.

tom laughed menacingly and your eyes shot right back up at him, pleading for him to be nice. “let’s see... let’s try number five maybe? i know that’d be skipping two levels but it just seems like it could be fun, don’t you think?”

you shook your head slightly but before you could get a word out, he pressed the button. you gripped the table and bit your lip as you tried your best not to moan, “fuck—“

“careful, love. people can hear you, you know.” he smirked, “wouldn’t want them to know how much of a desperate little whore you are for me.”

you groaned quietly at his words, biting your lip again.

he flipped the remote in his hands, fiddling with it, practically mocking you. “might need to put something on that,” he pointed to his lips, “the way you’re biting into it, that’s bound to leave a mark, you know.” he raised it to the next level and you bit even harder, “really should be more careful.”

soon but not soon enough, the waiter came back with your meals and tom thanked him for the both of you, seeing as you were preoccupied trying not to scream out loud.

it had been several minutes and you still hadn’t taken a bite of your food. tom of course, noticed. he turned the toy off and you released a relieved sigh. you looked up at him and he almost melted on the spot at the pleading look in your eyes. “eat, love.”

you took a deep breath and reached for your fork hesitantly, eyeing tom suspiciously and he laughed, raising both his hands in the air. “m’not doing anything right now, promise.” he took your hand and kissed your knuckles, “still have to make sure my girl eats. you know that.”

you took a bite of your food and you were almost shocked at how hungry you were. you took two, three more bites and you were soon fully immersed in your meal, enjoying every bite. you were now more than halfway through your plate, and you didn’t notice the small smile stretched out on tom’s face––you should have been paying more attention. 

just as you were about bring the fork back to your mouth, you felt the vibrations once again at the same level they’d stopped, and you almost slammed your hand down on the table in surprise. 

tom chuckled, “go on, finish up.” he pointed to the rest of the food on your plate. 

“fuck you.”

he pouted in false sympathy, “aww i know you want to, darling, but maybe later, yeah?”

you struggled to take a few more bites and set your fork down when you noticed tom’s attention had shifted to the device in his hand. he was scanning it, looking at it thoughtfully, “hmm...well there’s ten levels so we’ll just have to make our way up to ten won’t we?”

you shook your head, “n––no please...”

he looked up at you, tilting his head. “did you say no?” you gulped. “well you see darling, i payed for ten levels, so i’m going to try all ten of them. understand?”

you nodded, wide eyed and tom couldn’t help but smile. “such an obedient little slut, aren’t you?” he looked back to the device, “let’s see we’re on six right now. should we jump to eight so soon?” he looked to his plate and shrugged, “well i’m almost done so we better hurry it up.” he pressed the button, “might as well.” 

you bit your lip again, and how it wasn’t bleeding already was beyond you. both your hands gripped the table and you couldn’t stop yourself from letting a small whimper out. tom’s eyes darkened as soon as he heard it and you sighed, thinking he would finally call it a night and head home. 

“you’re really struggling, aren’t you?”

you nodded helplessly and his jaw clenched. he called the waiter over and you let out a breath of relief, a small smile on your face. just as he approached the table, a small smirk appeared on tom’s face and you felt your stomach drop as the vibrations increased. 

he glanced over at you before facing the waiter, “could we get the dessert menu?”

[leyyvi]

LEY HONEY!!! I’ve been putting off sending something for some hours now cause every time I think of something, I see someone else asked it or mentioned it and my questions are answered aisknfjd BUT NEVERTHELESS I HAVE SOME THINGS I WANNA SAY

1. I wanna thank you for making this sugar daddy Levi as he now just haunts my mind 24/7 alongside Liv’s percolate Levi and have combined together when I think about my fwb who reminds me so much of Levi to begin with?? like this is all my stupid little mind can think about and both of you spoon feed it repeatedly and it doesn’t help that this little fwb of mine decided he wanted to give a relationship a try because it’s me ?? LIKE SOME OF THE THINGS HE SAYS I SAEAR IVE READ THEM IN BOTH OF YALLS FICS AND I CANT HELP BIT THINK “does he read them too? or does he listen to me so well when I talk to him about these fics because he actually cares??” OTS UNHEALTHY HOW MY THOUGHTS ARE JUMBLED UP AT THE MOMENT BECAUSE OF THIS (sorry for this little rant, I had to get it out)

2. Now for the good part, HOLY SHIT LEy the TALKING OF THE TOYS ??? If you do one of those where he has full control of it and they’re somewhere like say the event that he was going to ask her to join him to (was it a ball of sorts?? I already forgot!!) but I’m just thinking of them doing this there and him watching her lose her mind while she’s trying to manage a conversation with maybe Erwin or even Hange or just anyone!! and he’s watching from afar until she just excuses herself and he follows in pursuit and when he catches up to her tells her something like, “who said you could just leave when I’m having fun?” (IDK MY MIND ISNT GREAT AT THINKINN OF LEVI THIS WAY BUT I CANT STOP THEM)

3. If it is someone else who said hello upon answering the phone call, i won’t hate you and I’m sure none of us will (it’s your story, you do with what you will!!) BUT OMG THE AGONY ILNGOING TO FEEL !!! unless it is Levi and he said it in a question because they haven’t talked in like a week and she’s suddenly calling so he’s confused and worried ??! (I know my comment on ao3 showed a different perspective on this but I’ve had time to think okay??!) if I knew how to hack your computer, I would just so I could see what you have planned out next for these idiots!! I JUST NEED LEVI TO GET HIS SHIT TOGETHER AND KISS HER OR FOR HER TO JUST SUDDENLY KISS HIM AND WHEN SHES ANOUT TO LULL AWAH FOR JIM TO GRAB HER AND KEEP IT GOING !!!!

4. I forgot what else I wanted to say/had in mind so uh, I’ll leave it here and just tell you to have a good day!! You deserve it!! Take your time with the next chapter/s, we’ll all be patiently waiting for whatever you’ve got up your sleeve!! 🤧💕 I just hope my heart won’t be broken 🥲💔

ALEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX GODDD YOUR THOUGHTS i LIVE FOR YOUR THOUGHTS PLEASE.

god okay let me just say Liv's percolate Levi...i am both intimidated but also in love with him. i am so fucking in love with her depiction of him bc it's very similar to how i view him actually shhh don't tell her. or do idk djkfhsdk

also her moodboard for him i have not forgotten and fdhfjkhs i lowkey had some of the same pics for reference in my pinterest for paychecks levi uwu

YOUR FWB WTF omg I'm?! VERY HAPPY FOR YOU WHATG THE HELL IF HE'S TAKING NOTES IM-GIIIIRL he better treat you right <3 you deserve it <3333 PLEASE IM LIVING FOR THIS I truly love that for you :')))

oh my god i--i have IDEAS. WAY TOO MANY FUCKING IDEAS and it's gonna be so hard to weed them out. i honestly might have to just make oneshots after paychecks ends because of the possibilities jfkhsdfjkh "who said you could leave" GOD PLEASE you're only feeding more into my ideas holy shit.

I CAN'T WITH THE PHONE THING LMAOOO i really don't know how to respond to it when you guys bring it up but i will just casually slip in the reminder that there is a light angst tag on this story (tho idk how accurate it is anymore) and a happy ending tag so :) take that as you will <3

and not to sound ominous but next chapter is another one i've been looking forward to working on so much, it's probably one of the more cathartic ones that i've written so far. <333 i love the change in your perspective though!!! it's so interesting to see how just a little bit of time can shift things sdfjhksdkj

BESTIE if you SAW the draft it's a complete MESS BUT bc i love you im going to offer the smallest of crumbs and to any1 who bothered to click the readmore HAHA (ill put it at the end in case you don't wanna read it)

bb as always thank you for reading and offering me such wonderful input and your thoughts, truly live for them bc the same way HAHA GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR MANS BTW OMG dsjhkf ROUTING FOR YOU<3

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It’s loud. Unbearably loud. Levi has Hange to thank for that. They’re rambling at an unnecessary noise level, completely inappropriate for the setting that they’re in.