#low effort analysis lol

[crowfromfoggyforest]

I've seen people say "hell in hazbin doesn't even seem that bad..."

Sure, hellaverse hell isn't torture in a traditional way, but it's a place that pushes you to continue your miserable life and constantly give in to the darkest temptations because they're all around you. It's a place where you can never get better, where you can never escape the cycle you got stuck in during your life.

[madockisser]

Hi, I just finished reading Queen of nothing and I was looking through the books again.

The scene with the faerie fruit in TCP Carden throws the salt away (the antidote), I find that quite odd

Although as he's returned human servants before pricking their fingers seems like an easier thing than making them eat something salted?

Maybe there's no significance to it, it's just something that sticks in my mind for that scene and wondered if you had any thoughts on it

short cardan analysis / why did cardan throw the salt

hi! i am not sure i understand the question completely, so feel free to send another ask abt this, but i assume that you’re wondering why he threw the salt in the first place? i doubled this as a short cardan analysis/ scene analysis! hope u don’t mind!

if you’re asking: why bother with the salt at all, when jude has salt in her blood? not sure, but salting food destroys ensorcellment on that food, so she has to keep it on her anyway, opposed to pricking her finger and putting her blood on her food lol, BUT as for cardan..

at the faerie fruit scene, cardan does not yet recognize his feelings for jude as anything that isn’t hatred.

since jude is consuming his every thought, he’s frustrated, and eager to make her obey him, because he thinks that when she submits to him, stops opposing him, that he can finally stop thinking of her.

and so, he pushes valerian off when he’s atop her, choking her, bc he never wanted her to die. that is very clear to him from the start, he never wants to be like dain. but it’s unclear to jude bc she’s biased.

holly states that if cardan were a better person that he would’ve found a way to stop his friends sooner, which is true, but unfortunately, because of his upbringing, he is not.

now, he throws the salt in the air scattering it among the grass, because finally, he thinks that under influence of the faerie fruit, jude is going to submit to him.

in part, he does want to see her humiliated, brought down low, for bringing him down low with her. another part of him does want to see her hurt.

which is obvious. cardan hurts and humiliates faeries throughout the high and low courts. it’s just what he does.

but as the events progress, as nicasia makes her undress and humiliates her further, cardan finds himself irrationally upset.

because it turns out that cardan does not in fact like seeing jude hurt or like seeing her humiliated as he thought.

bc he hadn’t recognized his feelings for her yet. until i suspect, now, due to this scene.

anyway, i must sum up cardans character to help ppl understand, prince cardan acted as though he had no heart for a long time, to protect himself. because when he did act like he had a heart, ppl hurt him. his mother, dain, balekin, nicasia, locke even.

and so by pretending to not feel for jude made things easier, but when they both clashed and fought, he realized more and more how jude takes up his every thought, even when she shouldn’t. even when he was w nicasia.

and when jude was hurt and humiliated, he realized not just the surface level feelings of desrire, but how much he cared for her. how much he didn’t want to see her hurt, see her humiliated.

opposed to the many folk he hurt and humiliated and cast from court. bc jude was different. she wasn’t a courtier that bowed and smiled and faked at flattery, which he grew to find insufferable and angering.

she found him undeserving of princely treatment, and tried her hardest at fitting in, even when she very clearly was human. even when he thought that it was pointless and ridiculous.

cardan finds jude fascinating for many of her qualities, but as we see in htkoelths, this is one of them. and one of the first qualities in her that catches his eye. her determination. her unwillingness to give up and to submit.

which he didn’t understand, bc he’s fae and a prince and he doesn’t have to fit in, and she was a human and a bastard, so why put any effort into anything at all? why work hard for a short life? cardan does not understand humans, he’s a child, and he only interacted w glamoured humans before her and val moren.

anyway, it seems that jude and taryn were mostly left alone in gentry classes by cardan specifically, while valerian would harass jude himself (ex: when he stole her pen and madoc replaced it w a ruby one). until taryn started seeing locke which made nicasia upset.

that is when they full on started harassing them.

at this point cardan cared for nicasia(despite the cheating) which he admitted he hurt jude and taryn for her sake when he was kidnapped by jude,, but as a facade he pretended at wanting to hurt the twins just for funsies.

until he didn’t anymore, and it was fueled by jude’s “audacity” to fight back, and his hatred-desire for her.

meanwhile, valerian was struggling w the same hatred desire. except like 1000x more twisted and sick. bc he truly wanted to hurt and kill her. he is very unseelie.

and nicasia is searching for any opportunity to bring the twins low for taking locke from her.

and locke wants to make a game out of hurting taryn and jude and nicasia AND cardan (LOL) bc he knows that cardan wants jude, so he starts “seeing her” which drives literally everyone; taryn, nicasia, cardan, and perhaps even valerian mad (LOL) bc he’s a cunt

BUT the point i’m trying to make is that cardans friends ARE NOT really his friends bc they all wanna hurt him. intentionally or not. if it sates their desires then they’ll take it.

if cardan had started showing his care for jude.. i mean. it would be over. they already want an excuse to hurt jude as is, cardans just a bonus. and locke was actively already doing that, since he was the only one who had yet realized how cardan felt for her. if nicasia and valerian had realized?

i don’t think jude would’ve survived. but i do think that valerian did sorta know that cardan wanted her, but i think when he realized it was more than lust was when he crashed out and went to kill her.

why? bc, jude had always payed singular attention to cardan when they were harassing jude and taryn as a group, but to jude it was all “i hate cardan i hate cardan” and for cardan it was all “i hate jude i hate jude”

and valerian wanted jude, he wanted her to be as affected by his hurting her as it did when cardan hurt her. but it never did.

i think he realized this and crashed out and got high and tried to kill her.

so in short, i think he threw the salt as a guise to his buddies, to 1, appear as though he didn’t have a heart (like usual) so that they wouldn’t realize he cared for her and hurt her more bc of it, and 2, he knew jude’s blood has salt content, so he could always (and did) resort to that, and 3 bc he thought that he wanted jude hurt and humiliated, but as it was happening, he didn’t like it and began realizing how he truly felt for her

below are holly blacks official annotations, which are canon, so pls read the pen markings!! very important!!

this was SUPER messy i literally just threw this together the second i saw it so i’m sorry! hope this helped tho!! 🫶🫶🫶 feel free to add on!

[furiousgoldfish]

How do I decide a career field?

I mean my entire self esteem, self worth and self confidence is destroyed. I hate myself. I don’t think I’m capable of doing anything. I like art, even though it’s very hard for me to do I’m pushing myself to explore as much as I can. I am thinking of going into data analysis but it’s so overwhelmingly scary for me.

I have an MD, but i can’t pursue it because of my mental health issues.

Okay so I might not be the best person to talk about this, because I figured out that career just isn't important to me when I'm just trying to survive, so I don't think any field is worth chasing or putting effort into, for me at least! Job is just something that gives you the means to get survival resources and that is it.

Otherwise I really relate to what you're saying, I also don't feel like I'd be good at any field, don't feel like I'm made for anything and can't see myself doing anything specialized seriously. It's also very difficult to choose a field when you've never gotten to try bunch of things, never had experience doing stuff and you don't really know what you'd enjoy, what you like, or at least what doesn't feel too stressful, overwhelming and impossible.

It's incredibly impressive that you have a MD, that alone signifies great endurance, persistence and intelligence on your part, and it's awful that mental health issues prevent you from doing anything related to it (I feel the same tho, my degree is in the closet, never seen or used at all lol)

I think the best way to decide is to talk to people who work in various fields and ask them what their day-to-day work is like, and figure out where you see yourself, where you fall in easily, or at least what seems doable, not too stressful, not overwhelming. What doesn't make you hate yourself. I'm just doing cleaning but I couldn't be more pleased because it's very obvious when I've done well and it's so low stakes that pretty much nothing can go wrong. Nobody ever complains either. In fact yesterday I got a text message from a client saying I did amazing, I mean that kind of stuff is ideal to my mental state.

I think we're raised to believe that our career needs to be something very significant, something that creates a place for us in the world, the proof that we're useful to society and that we made something out of ourselves! We need to show off our success and our identity needs to be tied to what we do. And we need to be good at it and make a difference in the world with it.

Well in the current capitalistic climate, this is bullshit. The only socially useful jobs are the ones which get no recognition, no social acceptance, no praise, no acknowledgment, in fact you're looked down upon if you just do manual jobs that are incredibly necessary to keep the society going.

The jobs where you can reach high success and high paycheck - are the ones that make rich people richer, and that is not what I'm about. I mean it's not what anyone really wants to do, but it's the only thing that is considered successful and admirable, and I hate it, don't want to participate in it, makes me want to run away from capitalism.

And also it's a myth that you need to be really good at your job because people do bad jobs constantly and get paid and they don't feel bad at all, lots are bad on purpose and use their jobs to do evil, and get away with it, so there's no pressure to be perfect at your job. If it gets done thats all that matters.

So if you can find anything that just fulfills the purpose of getting your survival resources to you, go for it. If you feel like data analysis is what makes you pleased and happy, go for that. If art makes you feel good, you can do that too! You don't have to have only one job, you can change jobs multiple times during your life, it doesn't need to define who you are, you are not here to serve the society, you're here to survive and you can do your job for yourself only. It's supposed to serve you, not the other way around. You don't exist only to do your job. You exist to be safe, and happy, and fulfilled, and safe. A job is supposed to do this for you, and it doesn't matter which one, as long as you're not being tormented by stress and fear, it's fine.

So what I'm trying to say, the world should not pressure you into making a quick decision, you should take your time trying out stuff and finding what works for you, and what doesn't make you feel awful about yourself. And also if it helps, everyone has a sort of a low confidence when only starting! Everyone is bad at everything when they're starting. Confidence will come with experience, when you see yourself getting better at something trough the years, you will get a chance to gather some faith in yourself and know you're doing well. You can follow any interest you have, regardless of how well or bad you're at it, as long as it can secure you some income. It's okay to be bad at first too because everyone is kinda bad at first.

Also, I've seen some people incredibly confident in their work while doing an awful job at it, it was pretty scary. Like they were doing active harm to society and didn't understand how anything actually worked but boasted about how capable they are because they were picking up a high paycheck. When I think there's people like that, and then others are worried about not being good at anything, it makes me stunned. I truly believe that no matter what you do, you'll never do as much harm as some high-paid people out there.

I hope you don't have a horrible time deciding anon! It's a difficult spot in life for anyone, so don't worry if it takes a bit of time or if you choose something and then quit, it just brings you a step closer to what you actually like doing, and it's a good thing to try things out and pick out the one that works best for you.

[blockgamepirate]

(that post was so banger it finally made me register an alt) Honestly, you are so correct about L'Manberg

I remember regularly lurking around mcytblr and reading analysis and I think I only saw coherent L'Manberg nationalism analysis from, like, Xephyr and a c!Dream blogger/fan. Which is crazy in retrospect, because the ease with which most of the fandom leaned into fictional country hardcore patriotism was/is kinda insane

And the ensuing anti Doomsday stance -- like we all know that terrorism is bad and shit, but absolute refusal to acknowledge that maybe Doomsday trio and co were not punished by the narrative for having done that was because they were right was. sure something!

omg that's very flattering thank you :D

By Xephyr I assume you mean @considermygenderminecrafted ? Because yes, xe has some of the best L'Manburg critique out there, as well as some of the best c!Wilbur critique, everybody should absolutely check it out immediately (altho frustratingly, I just tried to find some of their posts as an example but Tumblr's search function is still absolute garbage (Xeph, do you have some of your great posts at hand and if so, can you just link some of them in the reblogs or something?))

And yes. There are valid criticisms that can be made of the Doomsday Trio's tactics (which even Techno himself sort of acknowledged later), but at the end of the day, they were on the right side of history

(Well Dream's character less so, but I can't even be bothered to try to analyse him at this point because none of his plans make sense to me)

Also nobody ever seems to acknowledge that Doomsday Trio were acting in self-defence, since L'Manburg had already gone after both Techno and Phil, and was at the time trying to kill Dream as well, although he kinda beat them to the punch (possibly because he already knew they were planning to kill him? idk, I'm not sure if that was ever confirmed or not)

But yeah, the argument about them needing to be punished by the narrative was always absurd to me, and it just betrays the fandom's belief that L'Manburg was supposed to be objectively good, despite all the evidence that it very much was not, not even to its own citizens! And possibly also the unquestioned assumption of "state good, anarchy bad"

Meanwhile the actual narrative repeatedly shows that L'Manburg always ends up becoming toxic, corrupt and ultimately oppressive, even under the Good President, while on the other hand the anarchist commune eventually turns into a sanctuary for all sorts of people who need a safe place to stay (even arguably the aforementioned former Good President when he needs somewhere to hide his son from kidnappers)

And yeah, this is why I did get pretty heated about some of the debates at the time, and I kinda still do, because in the process of assuming that L'Manburg was always the good guys, they ended up repeatedly justifying just absolutely horrific state violence as well as excusing early L'Manburg's xenophobia (as comedic as it initially was), which unfortunately mirrors a lot of real world authoritarianism and xenophobia

To be fair a lot of this was probably also protagonist-centric morality, since most of these people also saw the L'Manburg side as the main characters, but then again what is nationalism if not a form of protagonist-centric morality where you see your own country as the protagonist of the world lol

I might actually need to make a proper post now since multiple people have shown interest, unfortunately I'm also very lazy and kinda made my main points in that low effort post already

Which would mean that it would actually have to be a high effort post to justify its existence

[melrosing]

As your not a big fan of fantasy books in general. What drew you into loving asoiaf? What got you hooked?

now that I'm invested in asoiaf I do genuinely like the fantasy elements of the story, but the stuff that really pulled me in was the human drama and political intrigue etc. I love the character work, almost all of the POVs feel fully realised and subvert typical tropes in really interesting ways (imo). I like the inter-generational drama (the reasons I like succession are v similar to the reasons I like the Lannisters), like if I want to understand Jaime and Cersei and Tyrion I can look to Tywin, and if I want to understand Tywin I can look to Tytos, and if I was to understand Tytos I can look to Gerold, like it's a russian doll of intergenerational trauma what more could a girl want.

and on that note I really like the scope! GRRM obviously feels this need to account for all details minor and major, so that even with everything that's already on the page there's room to extrapolate so much more. i mean here I am writing who knows how many words about a fake 20-episode long robert's rebellion tv series lol like this all happened before the series even starts and yet I hardly need to make anything up bc there is so much to draw on just based on all the random little details we've got here and there from characters reflecting on the same events from different angles, and trying to piece together portraits of the people who died based on the recollections of those on the page who remember them..... it is so fun)

and yeah usually I prefer to read about that kind of thing on a smaller scale but the drama that plays out in AGOT is so engaging that upon initiation I didn't find it so much of a chore to keep track of all the various houses and lands etc in order to understand the full implications of each thing that happened - it felt like it was worth the effort. generally it's the 'keeping track' of it all that I find grating about fantasy bc I really want to just get on with the story rather than keep on top of a hundred magic systems and sub-species of pixie.

and obvs asoiaf is low fantasy rather than high fantasy, i.e. there aren't intricate systems to the magic and or complicated genus for each of the creatures, so that made it feel a lot more accessible for me as someone who just isn't very interested in those kinds of details. Dany's magic is made up as she goes along, it's never explained, and that's the same for pretty much all the fantastical elements - it's very show don't tell. and even though when you count it all up there are quite a lot of fantastical features and subplots, taken together with the rest of the story it's more like.... seasonings I wouldn't usually choose but ended up liking just fine in this overall dish lol

and finally asoiaf just really appealed to me from a fannish perspective! I really hate when you're trying to dig deeper with a work and you quickly start to realise that the writer(s) just weren't thinking that hard. it feels like striking concrete with a spade, like it's a one-sided conversation rather than something both the writer and the reader are participating in. I think some fans are perfectly fine with that and good for them - who cares if the author built the work to sustain your analysis if you're just having fun doing it - but for me it's a complete killjoy, I end up v frustrated and like the work isn't worth my time

so here's GRRM who is so fixated on the finer details that he's churned out a history book like 700 pages long and a bunch of short stories and also another history book just to add a bit more texture to the main story. and I don't have to worry about network input or co-writers or actors' intentions or whatever other external conflict or influence cos for better or worse it's all his story. and that just suits me better lol, it's one guy and his shitty computer, and me reading the shit he wrote with it. pure and simple living in the moment no phones in sight

also jaime and brienne are everything to me xo

[familyabolisher]

I'm very curious about any more in depth thoughts you have on It Came From The Closet! It's been on my radar and I'd been planning to check it out soon as my next read, and this is the first opinion I've seen on it that isn't part of what feels like marketing reviews almost. Is it the analysis of the horror movies and themes that feels off or the way the essays are written? I'm a huge horror fan and I've definitely seen a...few queer horror takes that felt either like reaches or just "off" to me, but it's always hard to put my finger on it

i’ve only read the first few essays so it’s entirely possible that the volume will improve from here on out (though i … haven’t gotten my hopes up), but my impression so far is that it’s a series of schlocky, surface-level analyses providing a veneer of pop talking points around “horror” and “queerness” over what are often frankly uninteresting personal essays. v little insight and v little desire to bring anything new to the table; frankly, v little interest in the films they purport to be writing on beyond shallow rhetorical vehicles for personal reflection. my patience for The Personal Essay is vvv low at the best of times, but like, i can appreciate a work from which i can glean some compelling insights and articulate a thoughtful response. and, god, none of these pieces have crossed that hurdle so far.

like, if it’s not a long string of appeals to buzzwords like “queerbaiting” and “bury your gays” or v poorly substantiated appeals to "subversion" then it's incorrectly defined “reparative reading” or one writer citing that stupid mary oliver soft animal of your body whatever line out of literally nowhere. it’s just not insightful or imaginative. at its worst it does just read like an annoying tumblr post circa 2017. carmen maria machado writes an essay on jennifer’s body as articulating something essential to her bisexuality such that efforts to talk about the way in which it marketed itself via appealing to the homophobic cultural currency of teen lesbian eroticism somehow constitutes “gatekeeping.” this is not compelling or original critical writing, people.

almost every essay seems to fall back on the same base claim: that what makes horror horrifying relies on a currency of alterity which discursively constructs the “other” and that queer people can & will identify with the “other”—the monster in the horror film—in order to make sense of themselves & overturn the hegemony that the film may well seek to affirm. cool, awesome—this is not new analysis. i would not expect this kind of thing to be churned out in a book published in 2022; we know this already. i worry that overleaning into this idea of a “reclamation” of sorts a) risks forfeiting the language we have available to us to actually talk about the sort of bigotry which can fuel these kinds of stories; how many people talk about le fanu’s carmilla as a stunning depiction of erotic lesbian vampires and lose sight of its having been a v homophobic, colonialist text in their doing so?; and b) neglects the tradition of horror within alterity; horror being made not out of a conservative ethos that we seek to critically remould into a kind of limp simulacrum of a “radical” one, but one born out of a desire to tell a story against heteronormative social imaginaries in the first place. it’s all well and good to identify with regan from the exorcist and cite your poor understanding of reparative readings (not a critical framework i subscribe to anyway, but like, at least get it right?) in doing so, but do we have to keep limiting our discourse to this back-and-forth about whether or not we can salvage obviously homophobic/misogynistic/ableist/racist stories forever? lol. i watched Hellraiser for the first time the other day and that was queer horror that could be met with on far more compelling terms than whatever all this is.

[loser-female]

A couple of notes on resumes, employment, job interviews from an actual employed person

(true in Western Europe, IT related)

I might be unpopular but DO NOT LIE on the things you know. Especially if you are doing a particular job like mine, you will look like an idiot and lose a potential job you could have gotten if you were honest.

But! Send the resumes even if you miss some of the requirements. I send mine at 70%. It works. This is how I got my actual job. This is why lying is useless - you don't need to. Just stick to what you know, show interest in learning something new and it will go your way.

(True for IT might be for other professions) a lot of the times you're not being judged for the things you know but how you reach to the knowledge and how you climb the mirror when answering a question. "I don't know but I would do this" is what they want to hear (granted that the reasoning behind is correct).

I got my job after the worst interview I've ever done - I even ended up crying afterwards. But while I answered wrong I showed that I use my brain when in trouble. This is what my manager wanted to see.

Only include hobbies if you can use the skills on the job, otherwise you're just wasting space. I like reading (=analysis), I like writing (=I can bullshit my way in a report), I play soccer in my free time (I'm a team worker).

While you might not be in search of besties, really make some effort to be civil and cordial to the people around you. Even if they are annoying, but shutting everyone off as I keep seeing as an advice how to be a "girlboss" is not it. (I said annoying, if there is bullying, discrimination and a terrible environment that's another thing)

In Psychology of Intelligence Analysis, the author noted that the creative being put in a bad environment performs less and worse than the least innovative person in a good environment. Furthermore, he also explains that if you stay in a job because you think you can change the environment you will be proven wrong. Do what you want with this information.

Show some personality. I've been told multiple times that people remember me after I meet them because I'm myself. I'm not pretending to be someone else, even though I'm not the most likeable person (I'm a GNC nerd and I have a strong personality and I have no problem in showing it). Guess who gets called at the end of the day.

You should practice how to answer basic and difficult questions. You should.

Also HR is not your friend, as in, they're not being paid to listen to your personal problems. They don't care and it only shows you have no boundaries in the workplace (which would be true and you should work on keeping your mouth shut). With personal problems I mean disclosing diagnosis (unless you're legally disabled or you're being asked due to some affirmative action law), sources of stress, low income (like,this will just mean you will be underpaid)... Same with demands.

Also there are some things your employer should not be asking for privacy reasons. This is different for every country and you should check it out. If someone asks you if you are planning to be pregnant you will be discriminated against.

That's what I can remember lol. Yes, I've had to deal with people advising to tell their employers about their ADHD and autism - in my country this is just asking to be discriminated against, but I've been told that in other places this would be the right thing to do because they are considered legally disabilities (what's legally considered a disability varies by country) and there is some affirmative actions going on.

On the specifics on how to make something out of your interest in IT I'm writing another post. That being said, take everything with a grain of salt. I'm only one person living probably in a different place than you do.

[genericpuff]

Same anon as before talking about writing stuff and worrying about if people will find it (but not the same anon as the other asks before that) - I think many people who are budding writers and artists have these concerns and bring them to you because you A). Are a creator yourself so you know what you're talking about in a verified sense and B). Idk about other anons but some of us (like me) take your reasoning (and critique) in regard to writing seriously because of your experience and how you analyze stuff such as LO.

I think at least some of us (again I can't speak for everyone nor can I or should I) wants to make sure they're not making mistakes such as the ones RS does in writing.

Also I might just take you up on your offer of Zelda fanfic - I do so love LoZ 😅.

ugh god, am I y'all's role model now or smthing? why would you do that to yourself (ㆆ_ㆆ)

okay but jokes aside, obviously people can't help who they look up to and I'm not gonna be a dick if y'all look up to my work and what I do here, just remember also that you're not obligated to agree with everything I say or take it to heart, you also shouldn't take my analysis of LO and how it's written/drawn personally because so much of that analysis is within the VERY specific definitions in which LO exists, definitions that don't really apply to many other webtoons on the platform. If there's anything I say or criticize LO for that speaks to you and your own work on a certain level, try not to take it as a direct personal attack towards you and more just like... if the things I'm saying about LO feel like they apply to your work, take it as advice for improving your own craft.

Or don't! You can literally ignore me and do what you were gonna do anyways. I literally cannot take that away from you and you absolutely shouldn't let me. I have no real power over anyone here, that's what I mean when I say I'm just a guy participating in their hyperfixation so don't feel like you gotta take me too seriously lmao

Also, yeah, okay, I'm a webcomic creator myself, but to put myself on the cross for once - I've never succeeded at this gig. Rekindled is the most consistent audience I've had in years, I think the last time my work was in a banner rotation was in 2015 (and it wasn't on WT), and I somehow make something like $20/month off Patreon. I've had small victories along the way, it hasn't been all bad, but this isn't my living and chances are low I'll ever find mass success with it. Everything I said about not taking my opinion too seriously because I'm just a random Internet guy applies to people like Rachel as well, while I criticize her work on the basis of it being a commercial product that should know better and I DEFINITELY harp on her for a lot of shit, at the end of the day she's in no way obligated to pay even a second of attention to me because she's made way more money in webcomics in the last 2-3 years than I could ever dream of making in the 10 years I've been doing this, that's something I can't take away from her and that was never the goal when it came to discussing her work. All I have to show for my own efforts is experience and rhetoric, and a few odd readers who have been around so long I wonder why they even still follow me LOL I am your typical "can never live up to the success of those who they criticize" chronically online shitposter. I don't think I should have to be on Rachel's level to be able to discuss her work, mind you, that's half the function of an audience to begin with, but it's not like I have any real legitimacy in this industry that you should worry about what I have to say. It's not like I'm capable of robbing Rachel of her awards or the money she's made lol

And by all means, go ahead and look for my fanfiction stuff, but I'm not providing any eye bleach because I wrote it when I was like, 13 years old, so search at your own risk lmao

(and if you do find it, no you didn't （︶^︶）/hj)

[carchaseonacarchase]

𝙲𝙰𝚁𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚂𝙴 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽𝚂!

k so i wanted to create some headcanons for our favourite unpopular ship lol, enjoy :3

carmen carries old pictures of them of their time together as detectives, well hided on the bottom of her luggage bag, but she'll never admit it

chase does the same

carmen has huge many skills, the languages, mathematics, analysis of art and science, she's good with technology, an almost photographic memory and also has the talent to frustrate chase with the low effort

chase considers himself a self-controlled man (at least when carmen sandiego is not around)

carmen absolutely loves competition and chase enjoys so much teasing her even with the littlest thing

phoenix (chase's falcon) actually dislikes carmen, way more when she's crossing the 4.99 meter chase's security perimeter, the bird is their anti shipper no. 1

always in the mood for a playful mockery, in the rooftop of a building, on the polar artic circle or in the middle of the desert

chaotic alliance

more chaotic enmity

chase prefers do the field work by himself, and as a special agent, he works alone, just to make sure that no one will interrupt if something else happens between them

every time they accidentally touch they try to stay close as long as possible, even if it's just seconds

chase likes to enclose carmen in every chance he has, for her side, sometimes carmen is slower on purpose just to have him over her and enjoy the view

they love whispering passive aggressive words to each other

carmen is great for stealing monuments but better stealing kisses ^^

chase would never admit, but he loves when carmen visits him at night at ACME just to "make fun of his incompetence to bring her to justice" he knows she's actually here because she misses him

during this night visits he offers her a drink then sit together and chat; forgetting about the law business and just sharing a nice moment as friends

carmen likes to steal things like his wallet, watch, or anything else, just as an excuse to see him again, chase secretly finds it adorable

she can ask chase to random reunions with her and he'll just go, no questions, same for her

if it doesn't break the law, chase hardly can say no to her

sometimes the tension is too much to hold and they just need it, so, when chase reports "she's out of reach" actually means that they had a quick encounter (the lipstick stains on his skin is something he has been learnt well to hide over the years)

he would give her some seconds ahead, he thinks he will reach her anyways (we all know he won't)

when she lows the guard, chase is faster than her and kisses her, after that he let her go with a smile in her blushed and confused face, as a little revenge to all the times she did the same to him

they have been good friends for a long time, even if they are not longer on the same side, the respect and love remains between them

"i'm marrying her to make sure she won't steal anything else for life duh"

so, what do you think? let me know ^^ if you want me to write more headcanons give me ideas to do and I will work on it :3

[beevean]

The post SOTN stories (except OOE and maybe PoR) have the nasty issue of wanting to look more story driven but without putting in the effort

Yeah sure the characters talk more, we have an official timeline detailing canon down to a t, but the actual story beats were almost always the same just presented in a bit of a different light

Oh no the good guy has turned bad except not really he was being controlled!

Oh no the local Belmont is unavailable!

Oh no my wife died and this gives me motivation to do the things I do!

The actual stories, when you go beyond the interesting ideas and premises, were pretty damn paper thin and CoD is the worst offender of this because 90% of the backstory is secluded to 2 pretty obscure mangas that are so different in general writing style when compared to the game itself that I find it pretty much impossible to connect the two, if not downright dishonest to, say, call Hector a compelling character beyond his general idea because the manga did this and that while the game itself aka the main material

It would be like Sega releasing a Mephiles centered side manga that miraculously does a great job with him, but with there being such a huge disconnect between the 2 medias and their respective interpretations can you really make a generalizing judgement on the character which includes his secondary yet superior iteration? Or isn't it better to just consider them 2 different versions of the character that, while officially canon to each other, might as well be two different versions of the same character?

You really come into my house to stab me like this :P

I agree that the stories in the games are paper thin, and rely on clichés. There is a lot of work that you have to put in when it comes to interpreting characters and finding parallels. Sara is maybe the most blatant example of this: I see how her fans go insane over the idea of her becoming unhinged with hatred when stuck in the VK, forced to kill demons for a millenium and feeding on their dark force, holding a grudge over Mathias/Dracula. Which is great! What an interesting idea, the holy weapon being powered by a woman's rage, herself being the driving force of the Belmont who cursed his descendants to hunt the night for the rest of time! But then in canon she's just the girl you have to save and then the girl who died to make Leon angry - somehow she's both the Damsel in Distress and the Dead Motivational Wife. So yeah. There is a shitton of potential for analysis, but canon only gives you the barest hints. And if you're here only to play as the badass protagonist and don't really want to put in the work, yeah the plots are weak at best and annoying at worst.

As for CoD... I half agree. I can't say that the mangas don't count only because they are separate, but I wish they were more easily available, because without them, the story in the game doesn't have the proper emotional impact. Both LoI and CoD are so obviously rushed and low-budget for their scope, and I guess the mangas were the easiest solution to include stuff the devs couldn't in the game proper (I still believe Joachim was meant to be much more than a mere boss). LoI is even worse because its prequel is pretty much lost, which shows why these mangas should have been preserved better.

I don't really understand what you mean with the writing style being too disconnected. I think the worst part of the mangas (aside from their obscurity lol) is that, while they overlap in the general sequence of events, they're obviously written by two different people and so the shades of the characters' personalities are different. Was Isaac a smug BDSM king with one hell of an inferiority complex? Or was he more levelheaded and proper before losing his mind? You decide which version is your favorite one, because we don't know which version is "more" canon. You can mix and match if you want, but again, that's you putting in the work.

And well, I am super biased but I do see a connection between the Hector of both mangas and the one from the game ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ both of them, especially the PtR one, flow nicely into what we see on screen. I just wish the game was a little clearer on how Hector is normally vs. the effect that the Curse has on him. I can infere that his real personality is how politely he speaks to Julia... but was it intended, or am I once again working for the writing?

[istumpysk]

I posted 6,125 times in 2022

That's 662 more posts than 2021!

1,173 posts created (19%)

4,952 posts reblogged (81%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@agentrouka-blog

@esther-dot

@aegor-bamfsteel

@catelynhightower

@ladyqueenofwinter

I tagged 1,977 of my posts in 2022

#stumpy ask - 890 posts

#anon - 711 posts

#operation stumpy re-read - 248 posts

#asos - 82 posts

#affc - 46 posts

#adwd - 40 posts

#jonsa - 34 posts

#please-dot - 31 posts

#lol - 29 posts

#sansa stark - 27 posts

Longest Tag: 108 characters

#i was wondering if the whole uncle killing a nephew thing might also be pointing to daenerys and her nephews

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Operation Stumpy Re-Read

ACOK: Daenerys IV (Chapter 48)

First and foremost, let me credit @shieldofrohan​ and @agentrouka-blog​ for helping guiding me through this. A lot of what you'll read are their ideas, and I would have been hopelessly lost without them.

@shieldofrohan​ is planning her own chapter analysis, and I'll be sure to include it here when it's finished, because I guarantee it will far exceed my own effort. Edit: It's here, and it's fabulous. Bravo!

Second, let me point you all towards @ladyqueenofwinter​'s two brilliants posts on the chapter transition preceding this one: here & here. Looking forward to her thoughts on the actual chapter, which I'll include when it's finished. Edit: Delivered! And worth the wait. :)

Alright, here we go.

ACOK: Daenerys IV (Chapter 48)

Long and low, without towers or windows, it coiled like a stone serpent through a grove of black-barked trees whose inky blue leaves made the stuff of the sorcerous drink the Qartheen called shade of the evening.

Hey look! Black bark, blue leaves -> the inverse of a weirwood tree. Not to mention that shade of the evening sounds a lot like weirwood paste to me.

What does it mean? Shit, I don't know, but I definitely wouldn't want to be Bran Stark's foil.

+.+.+

"When you enter, you will find yourself in a room with four doors: the one you have come through and three others. Take the door to your right. Each time, the door to your right. If you should come upon a stairwell, climb. Never go down, and never take any door but the first door to your right."

(...)

Dany raised the glass to her lips. The first sip tasted like ink and spoiled meat, foul, but when she swallowed it seemed to come to life within her. She could feel tendrils spreading through her chest, like fingers of fire coiling around her heart, and on her tongue was a taste like honey and anise and cream, like mother's milk and Drogo's seed, like red meat and hot blood and molten gold.

(...)

When they reached the door—a tall oval mouth, set in a wall fashioned in the likeness of a human face—the smallest dwarf Dany had ever seen was waiting on the threshold.

(...)

She found herself in a stone anteroom with four doors, one on each wall. With never a hesitation, she went to the door on her right and stepped through. The second room was a twin to the first. Again she turned to the right-hand door. When she pushed it open she faced yet another small antechamber with four doors.

(...)

The fourth room was oval rather than square and walled in worm-eaten wood in place of stone. Six passages led out from it in place of four. Dany chose the rightmost, and entered a long, dim, high-ceilinged hall.

(...)

The mold-eaten carpet under her feet had once been gorgeously colored, and whorls of gold could still be seen in the fabric, glinting broken amidst the faded grey and mottled green. What remained served to muffle her footfalls, but that was not all to the good. Dany could hear sounds within the walls, a faint scurrying and scrabbling that made her think of rats.

(...)

The long hall went on and on and on, with endless doors to her left and only torches to her right. She ran past more doors than she could count, closed doors and open ones, doors of wood and doors of iron, carved doors and plain ones, doors with pulls and doors with locks and doors with knockers.

(...)

Finally a great pair of bronze doors appeared to her left, grander than the rest. They swung open as she neared, and she had to stop and look. Beyond loomed a cavernous stone hall, the largest she had ever seen.

(...)

Could there be a secret door, a door I cannot see? Another torch went out. Another. The first door on the right, he said, always the first door on the right. The first door on the right . . .

It came to her suddenly. . . . is the last door on the left!

She flung herself through. Beyond was another small room with four doors. To the right she went, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right, until she was dizzy and out of breath once more.

See the full post

135 notes - Posted January 21, 2022

#4

Ned, the man Who can't play the game, didn't trust LF at all. It took his beloved wife vouching for him to make Ned trust him.

Tyrion knows that LF framed him for Bran's attempted murder. He knows he is bankrupting the crown. Yet he sends him as an envoy to the Tyrells.

And they call him a smart man and good player of the game.

Sorry but no. Ned is better than Tyrion at the game.

Nothing you read below is exaggerated.

Ned doesn't trust Varys. Keeps his distance.

Tyrion doesn't trust Varys. Ignores that instinct, and puts entirely too much faith in him anyway.

x

Varys implicates Littlefinger in the murder of Jon Arryn. Ned's too slow to connect the dots.

Varys implicates Littlefinger in the murder of Ned Stark. Tyrion's too slow to connect the dots. Believes he's being complimented.

x

Ned believes Cersei and/or Jaime killed Jon Arryn. Wrong, but reasonable conclusion.

Tyrion believes Pycelle killed Jon Arryn. Wrong, dumbass.

x

At first, Ned can't see Cersei and Jaime are screwing. Manages to figure it out on his own.

At first, Tyrion can't see Cersei and Lancel are screwing. Needs to be told.

x

Ned sends away the Stark household guard at a time when he's extremely vulnerable.

Tyrion sends away the Lannister household guard in the middle of a war.

x

n/a

Must be included, because funny: Tyrion pays a sex worker to be his girlfriend. Despite ample evidence, he can't see he's nothing more than a client to her.

x

Ned sends Littlefinger to negotiate with the City Watch. Yikes.

Tyrion send Littlefinger to negotiate with the Tyrells. How stupid are you?

x

Varys warns Ned there’s a plot to kill Robert. He takes no action. Robert is murdered.

On several occasions Varys warns Tyrion that Joffrey could be killed. He takes no action. Joffrey is murdered. Tyrion will be the accused.

x

Ned doesn't like Littlefinger, begrudgingly accepts his help, because he doesn't know any better.

See the full post

140 notes - Posted February 20, 2022

#3

This is so funny.

She could feel her heart pounding. There was snow in her hair and her right shoe was missing. It must have fallen. She shuddered, and hugged the pillar tighter. - Sansa VII, ASOS

x

Irri slid the slippers onto Dany's feet. They were gilded leather, decorated with green freshwater pearls. Does the butcher king believe a pair of pretty slippers will win my hand? "King Cleon is most generous. You may thank him for his lovely gift." Lovely, but made for a child. Dany had small feet, yet the pointed slippers mashed her toes together. - Daenerys I, ADWD

👏 @agentrouka-blog

142 notes - Posted June 23, 2022

#2

Public Service Announcement

We have arrived at Daenerys IV, ACOK (Chapter 48), otherwise known as the House of the Undying chapter.

I regret to inform you, the likelihood of me posting the chapter summary on time is low. This might take several days.

I’ll do my best fam, but please, let’s keep expectations low. Lol

154 notes - Posted January 4, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

It wasn't fair. Sansa had everything.

- Sansa Antis

Haha.

Meanwhile, she's barely a warg, is the least connected to magic, has zero ability to fight or physically defend herself, has no survival skills in a natural environment, and she won't play the central role in stopping Daenerys or the Others (she gets the political Big Boss instead).

And you know what? Nobody cares. Nobody is trying to make Sansa Stark into something she's not.

170 notes - Posted June 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[catdemontraphouse]

Note: referenced a post by @thedarkestcrow several times which I think is a really interesting one. Can’t seem to paste in the link🤨🙄 it was an ask answer about Sebastian’s contract

Hey also if anyone can tell me how to do “read more”on mobile… please tell me 😂🤦‍♀️

Just some character uh, idk analysis/hypothesis??

The more I think about it, the more I reckon Sebastian’s problem is that he has an unfortunate mother hen syndrome which he either isn’t fully aware of OR, more likely, is aware of but actively tries to deny. This is of course going off the assumption there is no governing body for demons like there is for reapers since we’ve never seen anything like that? And that Sebastian’s contract is something he made up for himself with no actual consequences outside his own judgement.

Sebastian goes above and beyond to critique and perfect the conduct of other people who are under his authority. His contract (which I won’t even get into atm lol) only states the following stipulations as far as I recall:

Yet he goes out of his way to not just keep OCiel alive but to rear him as he sees fit. He tries to feed him balanced meals and regulate his sugar intake, he demands the child brush his teeth well, instructs him diligently in various academic subjects etc.

Some of this you could argue is for the sake of the mission, i.e. making OCiel as versatile and cultured as possible in order to maintain social connections necessary for revenge. But I kind of have to wonder, is it even necessary? Like is that degree of adhering to societal expectations really required to reach the end goal? I mean maybe I’m wrong here but I feel like there’s other cheaper, quicker ways they could investigate who’s behind the cult than making alliances with other nobility and whatnot. 🤷‍♀️ Sebastian seems to spend more time teaching OCiel dancing or Latin than bloodily interrogating suspicious people who might be connected to the cult.

Same could be said for how Sebastian treats the servants. He praises them when they manage to or at least make good efforts at upholding high standards of etiquette and efficiency in their roles as housekeepers, even though he knows that isn’t really what they’re useful for. They were hired to be bodyguards in essence. I get that they want housekeepers around to make it look “normal” so people won’t question the Phantomhive household but I just find Sebastian’s dedication to molding them into proper servants a little more intense than is probably necessary? Could be he is just tired of doing everything alone but also this guy built a wholeass mansion in a night alone with magic. He could magically clean the whole house alone if he really wanted to, probably? Or maybe he’s running low on MP from not eating lol. Idk I’m just saying he seems to almost enjoy being a teacher even if his students piss him off.

He tells Will he’s “tired of messily sampling every dish available to him” and how that’s his reason for basically starving himself. I guess it would be like… idk a farmer raising a single giant pumpkin and waiting to eat that instead of growing lots of crops and eating regularly? An obsession with cultivation at the expense of well-being.

At one point the reaper says this about Sebastian compared to other demons:

This suggest you don’t *need* to make a contract to eat a soul, which would mean Sebastian’s suffering is self-inflicted. Because he’s obsessed with rearing and tending to things.

He says he enjoys “playing butler” and what that behavior translates to in Sebastian’s day-to-day life is essentially being a care giver. He enjoys raising and caring for things weaker than himself.

We see a similar behavior when it comes to cats. The main difference here I think is that cats dont seem to be considered demon food as far as we can tell. He doesn’t ever try to write off or hide his love of cats. Keep that in mind for later.

He also mentions that there are pets in his world but he basically indicates that he finds them ugly and unappealing. So having affection for other beings doesn’t seem to be an unusual thing for his species per say? It’s just what they find cute is very different from Sebastian.

There is no discussion of the demonic world other than this, Sebastian never returns there or mentions having friends or something akin to family there etc. He never spends time with other demons in the manga canon even though this panel kind of implies they have some sort of world or society? He seems oddly divorced from his own kind, doesn’t he? Or is that just me that thinks so idk

I think ultimately Sebastian finds what is, for his own kind, considered probably ugly and stupid livestock somehow endearing and cannot really cope with that. He is probably considered weird or creepy by members of his own species, and while he’s aptly aware of that he can’t help but be amused by humans and want to impress them. He doesn’t just fulfill the contract he goes out of his way to do it in a fashion that makes humans go “oh wow.” It’s not for the sake of impressing other demons!! They’re not watching. He doesn’t associate with other demons, ever. Only reapers, who I might add were once human dunno if that matters tho. He wants humans to *like him* he goes out of his way to charm humans that will do nothing for him except satiate his own ego and attention span.

But he eats them to survive. And also as a demon, he isn’t supposed to grow attached to humans. So he’s battling with this cognitive dissonance constantly, I theorize. Like he kills and eats people but at the same time, he likes raising them like pets? He loves teaching them things and is proud when he cultivates a human that really stands out among other humans. I have reason to believe he is an outcast in his own society and part of him is pained by that? Idk it’s all speculation but I’m fuckin autistic and stuff so I have to write essays about it.

I can’t find the damn video but there was this one VA live reading of a hypothetical scene where OCiel is dead after Sebastian ate him and he’s still going thru the motions of celebrating the kids birthday like… WTF? This man ate his pet and realized it was a mistake major wtf moment

Sebastian is like one of those Karens that breeds exotic cats and gets competitive at CFA shows…my human is a prime specimen give me an award

[nancydrewwouldnever]

Well, lol, we have to make sure people understand history!// I’m just so completely bored with current happenings. I ignored all the SM analysis last night, cause it’s just not worth the time. I love your history posts and dredging up of older interviews, those are always fun jaunts down memory lane, so thank you for putting in the effort. 😊

I am as well, to the point where I'd rather help a stranger plan a trip in Belgium!

I'm just at a really low ebb with fandom interest at the moment. It's tough when you feel like you're caught in a stupid game.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Omg megumi and Yuta are my favs after Inumaki LMAO (I’m Lowk salty that we did not get ANY lore exploration of Inumaki but maybe it’s better that way so he stays alive atp)

No the hating mainstream things to be “unique” is so eugh honestly like just because somethings mainstream doesn’t mean it’s basic…but exactly I’ve definitely lost the spark with jjk I think it just got too confusing? And I was losing the essence of the story and idk I know geges said before that that they’ve wanted to end jjk earlier but something about the editor saying no…? I feel like sometimes the lack of motivation kinda peeks through with how the story was done….which I get because writers block/art block and just burn out in general is so real I just wish circumstances were different lmao…

Also yeah the “jjk has the best female characters” ideation…hmm..it’s def better than the blatantly sexualized ones but at this point it kinda feels like a bare minimum/low standard thing that they ARENT sexualized like in most shounen content that makes people say this (i agree like wtf happened with yuki we barely saw her honestly?? Don’t get me started on tsumiki i was expecting them to take a route where maybe she’d actually wake up and play a more conscious role but what the hell was that)

NO LITERALLY im all for analysis and leaving some things open ended but idk in jjk it was just excessive that it turned into confusion like…the constant guessing and insane analysis that needed to be done to clarify things or try to parse things together is not my favorite…agreed that the story should not have to rely on deep level analysis to be understood!

Yeah I’ve definitely lost my emotional ties with jjk its just like well I got this far i might as well see how it ends

LMAO WIGGLY that made me think of a worm on a string but I see what you mean! One track soccer mind doesn’t give much room to explore lolll but it was executed very well hehe

LMAOO it’s the pipeline of shitting on side characters to loving them but I can’t with his hair cut…also don’t think he’s ugly like I guess he’s objectively relatively good looking? But yeah I never fully saw the appeal (it’s funny because I know a good amount of people who prefer him to Rin when I’m the opposite lol) and the Gojo aura LOL

THE ACCURACY IS INSANE the way I would have never known if you didn’t mention it (I don’t think I would’ve even noticed if I wrote it) the fact checking goes crazy LMAO but I love it honestly the research def gives the story more depth and feel to it rather than just a one shot/story that kinda just floats in the void of the universe or something…gives it ties to reality and an actual grounding in the world! (This was worded so badly lmao)

It’s always Karasu….I think it’s partially also because some manga scenes of him are a little goofy because they give him that smile that almost cuts across his entire face to give him that kinda evil looking smirk….and the anime style kinda striking that awkward balance of maintaining those features but not putting enough detail to go full asshole def makes it a little goofy LOL (but in art they put more effort into like the S2 trailer/teaser visual he looks great with all the shading)

And LMAOO IKR!!! I always think back to that I’m like KURONA WAS 4??? Bro wasn’t even on the field in the u20 match so I was Lowk a bit shocked haha, iirc Kiyora was also 5?? Like the discrepancy makes me laugh ik people probably developed during the second selection but the drastic change always gets me

Your tag with the arrow has me feeling idk why I found that so funny LOL

Also SHSHS drowsy allergy medicine is the worst…I hope you weren’t having a severe reaction or anything and also that you feel better soon!!!

-Karasu anon

there’s def a lot of areas where there could be more lore (rika’s character page is so odd??) just because of how many characters there are i think!! but i do feel like the story is wrapping up so some things might just be left as questions. or not, who knows!!

yeah there’s def a cycle of like thing gets popular -> everyone loves it -> it becomes so over saturated that people start hating on it to be different -> it becomes overhated -> in a few years everyone realizes it wasn’t that bad. the biggest problem w the “hating as a trend” is that it takes away from legitimate criticisms of the work, as fans will lump it into general hating for no reason.

besides just analyses being so important for even basic comprehension of the plot, i’ve noticed a lot of the storyline is dependent on random interviews gege has done. like nobara’s death only being confirmed because of an interview years after it was written is RIDICULOUS to me (even though i already thought she was dead tbh but there was enough speculation in the fandom that it obviously wasn’t clear enough in-story). things like interviews and character pages should give you fun additional information that can help you expand on a character (oh rin likes horror games!! karasu is scared of the water!! etc etc) but it shouldn’t be the MAIN source of KEY info on a character. idk i think a lot of people love what jjk could be at this point and not necessarily what it is.

YESS i honestly was not super pleased by the female characters in jjk!! they are cool, and they COULD be well written, but they aren’t. i think in terms of its contemporaries, demon slayer does female characters better than jjk (again, not saying they’re perfect because they aren’t, but, say, shinobu is a stronger character to me than even maki).

jjk is a sunk cost fallacy for me HAHA i’ve been into it for over 2.5 years now so i have to see how it ends but i don’t really care atp what happens 😭 i’m like an unbiased outsider…idk it’s sad i wish i could’ve stayed invested but i only even know leaks are dropping because my social media blows up whenever they do.

OMG i also think rin is better looking than sae but i find sae easier to write for some reason?? idk why 😫 like sae is canonically only interested in soccer at least rin likes horror stuff but honestly between the two of them it feels easier to separate sae from soccer than rin?? if only marginally so hahaha. sae occasionally expresses regret at only knowing abt soccer so i feel like he’d be more willing to open himself to new experiences if sufficiently prodded whereas rin is SO invested in soccer (because soccer = his relationship w his brother) that he doesn’t even seem like he could have a proper friendship w someone let alone an actual relationship 😔

it really is always karasu…i do think manga can get away w exaggerating certain features (ex karasu’s smirk) that anime can’t so they have to figure out a way to balance it — maybe it’s the static nature of manga vs the motion of anime?? although karasu hasn’t been smirking much in pxg vs bm 😕 give my boy his swag otoya back!! HAHA but i also think he was such a background character in that one scene of season one that they just didn’t gaf abt him. he’s looked really good in all of the s2 promotional material so i have faith he will be done well!!

KURONA AND KIYORA MY RANDOM AHH KINGS 🙏🏻 they came outta nowhere but they’re slaying atm…ig the hundred goal thing only tested a very specific aspect of playing soccer?? like shooting without anyone on you which doesn’t really translate to an actual game 🤔 like in bllk vs u20 they needed defenders and midfielders who wouldn’t necessarily score but were integral to the game 👆🏻 plus they didn’t all go in at the same time so better players like tabieitaken and shidou were ranked lower than randoms like tokimitsu probably just because they entered later 🤷🏻‍♀️

it wasn’t that bad!! i just got like overwhelmingly sleepy because i haven’t taken any in forever so i just crashed instead of staying up longer like i usually so haha. but i’m hoping to get the one shot out soon!! it’s pretty dumb but more karasu content is more karasu content 🤩

[mrnostalgic3]

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[lavender-annd-lilac]

Lloyd rolls his eyes at the choice of music playing quietly from your room, wondering how anyone could stand listening to it

Me too bro. Like, people have entire CAREERS based on xmas music. *cough*Michael Bublé. And Mariah Carey could prob live off the royalties from her xmas songs for the rest of her life and her next 4-6 reincarnations!! 🤑

He strolls to your room, his little legs making him slower

I’m curious about the layout of this house. Like, where is the point of entry? Are they coming in through the mail slot? How far do they have to walk to get to her room? I feel like Lee had an easier journey bc he only had to walk to the living room.

hearing what the others had done made Lloyd jealous

So do they just casually talk about this at work or

the boss needed him

For what🤨??? Maybe the boss should like, stop lurking in the shadows and do some actual work himself for once smh.

Gripping the sheets, he pulls himself up. Ignoring the pain in his muscles from the extreme activity

I’m disappointed at his lack of athleticism and low pain tolerance tbh. I expected better.

sauntered over to where you rest

My brain for no reason: I feel like this mattress is a 7-10 on the firmness scale - a medium firm to very firm rating

Me: why

Brain: ok bc like,

they are just walking on her bed over to her body like it’s flat terrain, no issues

If the mattress was memory foam or super soft, it would be like walking through a swamp, very difficult, a lot of resistance.

If it was really bouncy, it would be like walking across a trampoline - not exactly strenuous, but it would take some effort to balance and not fall over.

Me: u know what that makes a lot of sense. This was one of ur better TED talks I have to say.

needing to know why Jake kept talking about it as though it was the most delicious thing in the world

Lmao he’s like, Jake has the unsophisticated, trash palate of a feral raccoon 😒. His opinion means dick to me when it comes to taste. I’ve seen him eat peanut butter, mayonnaise and lettuce sandwiches 🤢 I need to sample this for myself

as for now, Lloyd wanted to do what he came here for. 

My brain: Ok so he’s the only one other than Johnny who came in with a plan. But, he has the added benefit of extra intel from the other elves so, I’m expecting a higher level of preparation.

Me: why can’t we apply this level of analysis to our own life??? 😩

Deciding to pull his hat and sweater off, he presses his bare body against you

If this mf-er also goes cave diving without an anchor line I’m going to be PISSED.

Lloyd huffs, annoyed some woman is making him seem weak and like he has no self-control

Dude… u did this to yourself lmao

Finally having enough with the child’s play

Whoa ok idk what ur childhood was like buddy, but I hope u never have a kid lol

Wondering how a little slut like you had this hold on them all

Men: yeah, we’re so strong and tough! We can hunt! We can fight! We’re smarter, faster, and more athletic than women! We are the superior gender!!! ��😤😤💪💪💪

Also men: oh no! I am aroused!! I have a boner!!! Omg a WOMAN did this to me! I had no control of the situation! This is a personal ATTACK!! There is literally nothing I could do to protect myself. She needs to shut herself away and wear a potato sack instead of aggressively living her own life like it doesn’t have a direct effect on me, an innocent male bystander 🥺🥺🥺

Hating how he’s become weak for your cunt, hating that he has no power

YIKES dude needs rehab, this is like some Trainspotting/Requiem for a Dream drug dependency talk 😩

The vibrations from his groans cause you to stir in your sleep slightly

He’s like the size of a baby carrot, how is his voice vibrating anything 🤨 like, a gerbil can squeak all day and it wouldn’t even shake a leaf

“This pussy is mine! You stupid little bitch!”

Me stealing rescuing a cat from the pet store and rollerblading away as the security guard chases after me

“Think you have power over us?! You don’t! You’re just some whore who likes being used by a bunch of elves!”

Pls get this man a padded cell the delusion is unreal 😵‍💫

his pointed ears twitch as he snarls

Pls take this man out of the padded cell bc this is cute 🥺

Lloyd decides to sneak a look at you, wanting to take in your peaceful form

Aaand show’s over. We can put him back in that cell now

quickly clearing his throat and acting as though he wasn’t caught

Honestly, this kind of behaviour has worked for every single US president in the past so there must be something to it 🤷‍♀️

Deny till u die lol

keeping eye contact as he begins to redress, making sure his pointed hat is on correctly.

The AUDACITY 😱 imagine like, trashing your entire workplace bc u didn’t get an xmas bonus, and then when the cops get there u just stare them dead in the eyes as u call an Uber and then waltz on outta there 🙃

Lloyd smirks, giving you a wink before turning, jumping off the bed, and disappearing into the night.

This is very cat woman tbh. I can see Selina Kyle doing this after she robs entire house and hops out the window 😼

not knowing why these tiny men kept choosing you out of the many women in the world

Haha imagine she slept through an entire zombie apocalypse or something and she’s literally the last woman on earth

You are so deep in thought that you don’t see the large man sitting in a chair in the corner of your room, a plate of biscuits in one hand and a glass of milk in the other.

Ok but did Lloyd not see him either or…. lmao 😂

He is thinking of ways to punish his workers for getting caught

So obvi I’m not a lawyer, but I’ve watched Legally Blonde so I’m basically like an unlicensed lawyer

OBJECTION your honour!!

This seems like a situation where boss man shouldn’t be able to bring charges against his employees without also implicating himself tbh. 🧐

Dude can’t just say “aha! I saw you at the devil’s black mass you heathen!!“ bc like bitch, what were u doing at the black mass huh??? Why were u there in the first place Karen???🤨🤨🤨

Also, what exactly is the charge here?😧

𝒋𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒍𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒔

🎄christmas masterlist🎄

warning - smut, slight somno, tiny elf male, human reader, stalker behaviour.

18+ only please, the gif and header aren't mine.

Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.

‘Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way’

Lloyd rolls his eyes at the choice of music playing quietly from your room, wondering how anyone could stand listening to it. He strolls to your room, his little legs making him slower, but he brushes that off, knowing that once he enters your space, he’ll get his prize.

A smirk appears on Lloyd’s face when he enters, eyes landing on your naked, unconscious form. He quickly jogs over to your bed, his mouth salivating at the thought of finally getting to have you and hearing what the others had done made Lloyd jealous. He wanted to have the first taste and feel of you, but sadly, the boss needed him. 

Gripping the sheets, he pulls himself up. Ignoring the pain in his muscles from the extreme activity, the thought of being inside you was too strong. Once Lloyd reached the top, he excitedly smugly sauntered over to where you rest. He drools when his eyes land on your glistening cunt. His pants are tight as his vast member strains against them, balls aching to fill you with his cum. 

Once he gets close enough to smell your sweet cunt, Lloyd quickly strips from his pants. Being eye level with the best thing he’s ever seen felt like heaven. He leans forward and pokes his tongue out, needing to know why Jake kept talking about it as though it was the most delicious thing in the world. The moment his tongue connects with your soaking core, his eyes widen, and Lloyd quickly jerks back. You taste so sweet as if you were made for them. If he didn’t pull back, he’d end up devouring you, which could wait for later. Because, as for now, Lloyd wanted to do what he came here for. 

Deciding to pull his hat and sweater off, he presses his bare body against you. His impressive length pushed between your lips, thrusting against you. Lloyd huffs, annoyed some woman is making him seem weak and like he has no self-control.

Finally having enough with the child’s play, he grabs hold of his throbbing base, lining his red mushroom tip with your hole before sliding in. The feel of your warmth and wetness causes his eyes to roll back. Wondering how a little slut like you had this hold on them all, irritating Lloyd to the point where he snaps his hips in and out of you. Hating how he’s become weak for your cunt, hating that he has no power. 

He leans forward, sucking your swollen clit into his mouth as he slams into you. The vibrations from his groans cause you to stir in your sleep slightly, and arousal begins to leak out of your tight hole. Lloyd’s little hips move faster, head tilting back as his mind becomes fuzzy from the pleasure. 

“This pussy is mine! You stupid little bitch!” An angry grunt leaves his lips as he continues to slam into you. “Think you have power over us?! You don’t! You’re just some whore who likes being used by a bunch of elves!” Lloyd shakes his head as his eyes become cross-eyed, his pointed ears twitch as he snarls, taking your clit into his mouth again. His little moustache brushes against you as he starts to suck your button. Lloyd’s hands grip wherever he can as his pace becomes too much.

He feels his body tense. His cock throbs rapidly from between your walls, twitching and pulsating madly as his end approaches in an incredible time, a feral groan escaping his mouth as his balls tighten. His hips jerked harshly into your weeping cunt, his sweet cream shooting out of his tip and directly into your awaiting hole. 

Taking his time to catch his breath whilst his cock softens inside you, Lloyd decides to sneak a look at you, wanting to take in your peaceful form. He opens his eyes and looks up from where the two of you are connected. His eyes widen when he notices you staring down at him before quickly clearing his throat and acting as though he wasn’t caught. He pulls his cock out of you, keeping eye contact as he begins to redress, making sure his pointed hat is on correctly.

Lloyd smirks, giving you a wink before turning, jumping off the bed, and disappearing into the night. Leaving you to blink as you continue to stare at the spot he was last at, your brows furrow in confusion and wonder, not knowing why these tiny men kept choosing you out of the many women in the world.

You are so deep in thought that you don’t see the large man sitting in a chair in the corner of your room, a plate of biscuits in one hand and a glass of milk in the other. A dark look casts his face as he stares at your defiled nude form. He is thinking of ways to punish his workers for getting caught. Luckily he knew about this before you began to ask questions. A smirk forms on his face when he thinks of finally getting his turn.

thank you for reading!

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