#loveiswork

[girltalkcollectives]

Why Most Relationships End at Stage 3 (And What Comes After)

Nobody tells you there are five stages of love. Or maybe they do, but we're too caught up in stage one to listen.

Stage 1: Falling in Love

God, isn't this part beautiful? Everything is perfect and new and exciting. The butterflies, the constant texting, the way they can do no wrong. Their jokes are always funny. Their little quirks are adorable. The way they breathe is somehow fascinating.

You stay up until 4AM talking about nothing and everything. Every song on the radio suddenly makes sense. You plan your entire day around the chance of seeing them. Even sitting in silence feels magical.

I remember thinking "this is it." Like I had somehow cracked the code to perfect love. Spoiler alert: I hadn't.

Stage 2: Getting Serious

This is when reality starts to blend with the magic. You're still in love, but now you're also building something. Meeting families. Planning futures. Moving in together. Making joint Netflix accounts (because that's basically marriage in 2024).

You start saying "we" instead of "I." You have inside jokes. You know their coffee order by heart. You can read their moods. You're a team. Or at least, you think you are.

The butterflies might fade a bit, but they're replaced by something deeper. Something real. You're not just in love anymore - you're choosing each other, every day.

Stage 3: What Happened?

And then... something shifts.

Suddenly their quirks aren't cute anymore. The way they chew is annoying. Their jokes aren't funny. The silence isn't comfortable - it's heavy. You start wondering if this is all there is.

This is where most relationships end. Right here. In this messy, uncomfortable space where the fairytale crashes into reality.

Their pedestal starts crumbling. You realize they're human. They make mistakes. They have flaws. They disappoint you. And worst of all? You disappoint them too.

Most people panic here. They think the relationship is broken. They think love is dead. They run.

I did. Multiple times.

But here's the thing about Stage 3 - it's not the end. It's the middle. It's the growing pains. It's the part where real love has a chance to begin.

Stage 4: Climbing Down from the Pedestal

If you're brave enough to stay, if you're willing to do the work, you reach Stage 4. This is where you both climb down from your pedestals and meet in the middle.

You see each other clearly for the first time. Not as perfect beings. Not as disappointments. Just as humans, trying their best.

You learn that love isn't about butterflies or grand gestures. It's about choosing each other, especially when it's hard. It's about seeing someone's flaws and loving them anyway.

Stage 5: Working Together as a Team

This is where real love lives. This is what all those romantic comedies don't show you.

It's not perfect. It's not always exciting. But it's real.

It's working through problems instead of running from them. It's knowing when to fight and when to let go. It's building something together, brick by brick, day by day.

It's understanding that love isn't something that happens to you - it's something you build together.

But here's why most people never make it past Stage 3:

1. We think the end of the honeymoon phase means the end of love

2. We're addicted to the high of Stage 1

3. We don't know how to love real, flawed humans

4. We're scared of doing the work

5. Nobody told us what comes after the fairytale

The truth is, Stages 4 and 5 aren't as glamorous as the first three. They don't make good movies. They don't inspire pop songs.

But they're where real love lives. In the mundane moments. In the hard conversations. In the choice to stay even when it's not perfect.

To anyone stuck in Stage 3: it's okay. It's normal. It's not the end unless you choose it to be.

The most beautiful love stories aren't about perfect people having a perfect romance.

They're about real people choosing each other. Again and again. Through the hard parts. Through the boring parts. Through all of it.

[keerawrrr]

arts & crafts on my day off, 1st attempt at cutting a shirt ✂🙌; also individual time spent between pets n the bestie; Lady is usually always under me n Sissy keeps to herself but they switched up on us 😍😍 . . . . . #mydayoff #readyfortheweekend #austinbound #roadtrip #petsofinstagram #qualitytime #terriermix #straycat #furmom #diyshirt #artsandcrafts #doggrooming #bff #drseuss #thriftstorefinds #summerfun #verycontent #friendshipgoals #getknockeddowngetbackup #loveiswork #420 #smokesomething (at San Antonio, Texas)

[farsigraph]

درد داره وقتي ميره و همه ميگن: #دوستت_نداشت و تو نميتوني ثابت كني كه هرشب با #عاشقانه_ها ش خوابت ميكرد.. خودت را از کسی پس نگیر شاید این تنها چیزیست که او دارد ، وقتی میگویی #دوستت_دارم اول روی این جمله فکر کن، شاید نوری را روشن کنی که خاموش کردن آن به خاموش کردن او ختم شود... راهایش کن رهایش کن، تا که روح ت نیز رهایی یابد... #Digitalpaiting #Digitaldrawing #surfacedesign #surfacepainting #Digitalpen #Surfacepen #Illustrator #Photoshop #photoshopeffect #wobderfull_girl ##digigirls ##digitalgirls #loveiswork https://www.instagram.com/p/B_QJb4PDPaP/?igshid=wu5dg4xnxp6f

[aarpoetry241]

A bit of a #waybackwednesday I found a love that heals my soul and pushes me passed the limitations I set for myself. Love is work, but it is the only work worth doing. #AshleyAnne #aarpoetry #instagood #indiepoetry #lit #love #loveishard #loveiswork #worthwhile #poetess #truth #genuine #ifoundalove #ache #heartache #holidayseason #throwback #wednesdayvibes #poetry #poetrycommunity #publishedauthor #selfpublished #mywords #spilledink #wisdom https://www.instagram.com/p/B5XiCBqBWVc/?igshid=1izt3jszx1pz6

[highheelhierarchy]

A strong marriage requires two people who choose to love each other even on those days when they struggle to like each other ♥️ #marriagequotes #marriage #husbandandwife #wifeysworld #wifeknowsbest #loveforever #togetherforever #loveiswork #weareateam #lifequotes #fashionnova #lux #familyiseverything #highheelhierarchy #bossbabe https://www.instagram.com/p/ByCurkRJF5z/?igshid=12g13xai87fml

[empathyundertow]

“I Love You” Sent Ten Years From Now

I opened a letter that was sent to me from the future and it validated my doubts from my pasts Honestly as much I’ve been hurt and scared as of right now Maybe I can trust this one cherishing vow of a letter The beginning was merely kisses and comfort As time went on, it wasn’t that these were meaningless as some worry but it becomes a necessity and needed to overcome pain around you From either the world or the pain that comes from loving someone I live on an island Famished with no clean water must I wait for rain and fish to survive Only by the teeth of my skin I sleep warmly at night when a heart washes to the shore and sleep with an empty feeling in my body and mind when I hear nothing From whenever and wherever this person is, I’m sorry It is so difficult and hard to stomach and deal with this pain It isn’t your fault and I could never swim from this island in fear of drowning As you need me alive I have to wait for rescue, a change of circumstance or to train to swim for an eternity of ocean All I will deal with without a second thought I’m just having this same nightmare of swimming for so long and I come onto the beach with you waiting for me to only discover you weren’t and never were waiting “It’s not true. I love you so much.” I believe that to the death of me It’s just that I don’t know the mind and the body from miles away The trust of others from beyond this vast sea The understanding of a rational future The trust in lacking of the self and the inability to do anything This island is going to be the death of me No, that isn’t right It keeps me alive Your love and my love for you will be the one to kill me in my sleep What is love without communication or reminder For... if you love someone and they never are there or say anything Although not the case It will appear just as always of only being by yourself Fear not I am a resilient man Though weak at times, wondering if sleeping on the shore and drifting away Was better than the days of isolation I will sit here and work my body and mind to the bone Eat sand if I must to push forward because this letter was sent from you on a February night Years from now An older you still loves me from what I know Which is all I can really ask for to put my life and the meaning there of on the line Because, honestly, I’m a pretty simple person All I need is water, food, a place to sleep and sometimes a hope to hold someone in particular for even a second

[chesnunez-blog]

16 years with my best friend & Soul Mate!!! #wecelebratefirstdateandweddinganniversary #16yearstogether #3yearsmarried #soulmate #loveiswork #God #Godhasaplanforus #godislove #Godislife #happiness #hope #blessed #grateful

[raenneday-blog]

[natty373]

Om Our Goodness #ganesh #omshanti #lovetheskinyourein #begrateful #lifeiswork #loveiswork #beinterstellar #liferefinementtherapies #creativesmentor (at Bangkok, Thailand) https://www.instagram.com/p/BoraEosAMOv3XrqZ411q_VfAi4WvmFEiTyZBBQ0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=gwbjo56zo88v

[kinaole01]

@bellaroseaz #WeddingSeasonstartshere! @heidisevents #11years #lovewhatyoudo #love #promisesofforever #loveiswork #seatingassignments #homemadeisperfect (at Bella Rose Estate) https://www.instagram.com/p/BoD2MyGFsmAS_Mrw2btCYeaQ_19jLegJ4tNb740/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1ga5xql8u4f60

[missgriffinsfinishingschool]

What a week it has been. I’m constantly amazed by this man’s capacity for hard work. This past weekend in New Orleans was the first time in a month that he didn’t have to work - a perfect few days relaxing and playing with friends. Then it was back to real life where he’s working 10-12 hour days and still offers to make dinner because I’m over here trying to grow my own business. In case anyone was wondering, that’s what Love looks like. ❤️ . 📷 by @asgoodasitgoetz . . . . #travelusa #neworleans #frenchquarter #satchmo #truelove #louisiana #exploremore #NOLA #armywifelife #exploreneworleans #southernliving #thehappynow #liveauthentic #downtownneworleans #historyiseverywhere #traveltheworld #roadtrip #loveiswork #armylife #besthusbandever #🇺🇸 #travellouisiana #adventureawaits #agoodman #southernstyle #jumpsuits (at French Market (New Orleans))

[charmconyc]

Life can be puzzling but one thing is clear #iloveyou . . . . . #charmco #lovequotes #loveher #puzzle #goldcharms #loveiswork #lovecharms #theone #oneandonly #otherhalf #lovelovelove #twinflame #soulmates #kindredspirits #jewelrylover #charms

[dzdjewelry]

💗 Love is a Splendid Thing but you gotta WORK at it! #lovequotes #loveiswork #loveislearned #allyouneedislove #dzdjewelry #lifelesson (at Evanston, Illinois)

[graceydotleonor]

sunday monday TUESDAY! Me and My Mukluk inspired combat shoes is ready for action👊👊👊 #mukluks #mamasgirl #loveiswork #shoesislife #instaoftheday #instame #love #freedom #lovelovelove #greatmorning

[narcichondriac]

Grateful for my self love crew. . . . 💕🌓🔥✨🌱☀️🙏🏾🕺🏽💚🤘🏾💫 . . . #SELFCARE #selflove #nourishthyself #icannotpourfromanemptycup #loveyourself #feedyoursoul #selflovesept #selflovestories #selfloveseptember #gohome #knowthyself #assertyourself #assertionNOTaggression #loveiswork #selfloveallowsustogivemore #selfloveallowsloveforothers #selfloveallowshappiness #nurturethyself #grow (at Fairfield, Iowa)

[be-selfish-with-your-heart]

It's not easy to stay in love. You have to work at it every single day. You cherish it because love isn't something that you can buy or toss around. Love is real. Love is pure.