#love that this is my bare minimum now
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'mons
#pokemon#pokemon art#alolan vulpix#poochyena#wurmple#noctowl#art#my art#fanart#pokemon fanart#ink#watercolor#traditional art#artists on tumblr#described art#love that this is my bare minimum now
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UGHHHHHHHH
Currently writing a fic that's basically just- "Emmrich has reached a level of besotted fool that even he can't handle because Rook gives him a hug and kiss every morning and night, and often gives him flowers and just thinking about that gets him hard and makes him pre because he's imagining married life already Send Help".
Like??? There's not even any dialog really it's just Emmrich being like- "he gives me kisses and hugs every day and gifts me flowers and alchemical ingredients 🥺🥺🥺" and fantasizing about being married to him and waking up next to him every morning like DAMN. Emmrich you got it bad. You're down horrendous.
#emmrich volkarin#Datv#In his defense Nehnlan is just as down bad he just seems more lowkey because he's not very expressive#Nehnlan “Rook” Lavellan#I can't write any more of this tonight it's past midnight and I hate how it's just like. This. No plot.#It's just Emmrich being in his feelings because no one else has ever treated him like this and like. It makes him wanna cry#Because he's usually the one giving everything and getting barely anything back and now? Now he's receiving so much#It doesn't even seem like much to Nehnlan either like to him this is the bare minimum#Then again Nehnlan doesn't really like. This is technically his first actual relationship hfjfidjdndkddj rip him he's 33 yrs old and like-#This. This is his first romantic relationship. Everyone else were just like. Friends with benefits#Part of his actions are what he thinks those should look like but mostly cause he wants to do this#Because he wants to show Emmrich how much he loves and treasures him. He thinks he has to make up for how expressionless he often is#Meanwhile Emmrich can read every micro expression he makes and the love in Nehnlan's eyes make him need to sit for a while#Lucanis (qpp with Nehnlan) is watching like- 🥺🥺🥺 Romance🥺🥺🥺 when will it be my turn?#(Because Neve and Bellara are smooching in my Nehnlan verse hfjdidjdjxkdkddj Lucanis I'm so sorry)
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Odypen fanart where Queen Penelope's hands are bloody from ripping apart the monster shell to reveal the husband beneath
#female rage Spartan portrayal too please#I've been made aware Sparta taught their women to fight after Penelope's time#but let me have this lol#let me see fanart where Odysseus resists Penelope's hands because he doesn't want to taint them#in contrast to Penelope who attacks like a rabid animal clawing her husband out#it's giving “I will save you from yourself you stupid fool”#it's giving “I didn't survive the last twenty years to get the bare minimum now. give me my husband”#yuh YUH 💅#epic the ithaca saga#epic the musical#epic odysseus#epic penelope#would you fall in love with me again
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Damn...I kind of love everything lately 🥹
#been taking major steps forward w/ health & just valuing myself and believing I deserve better than the bare minimum#haircut was a huge deal mentally and I look stupid cute now too. I got my eyes checked for the first time in years#I'm working out consistently and prioritizing feeding myself well and work is okay not great but okay. and I just submitted a really#promising job app and the weather is beautiful & I love knitting & going to my volunteer things & being in the world more than I have been!
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Thinking abt writing a one-shot for the zaundads showing the next couple of hours once Felicia leaves and both of them have a LOT of discussing/ plans to talk about but it quickly turns into an argument showing off the first hints of where they politically diverge. But all in some weird subtext style like 'Hills like white elephants' just to practice/build up my pastiche
#🍊.txt#arcane#zaundads#fanfiction#fanfiction prompt for myself later#ernest hemingway#i usually hate his style#but im coming around to it#i used to be a really long winded highly detailed writer#but now i love the sharp only include what is needed subtext style he has#i want to mimic it so i can creat deep contrast in my own work when usingbhighly detailed for slower moments#and fast paced bare minimum when dialogue or something intense is going on#writing#pastiche practice
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Whitney with tongue piercing y/y
#degrees of lewdity#dol#dol whitney#artists on tumblr#fanart#ok so I wasn’t all that into him#at first#but then he starts acting cute and soft#and I appreciate bare minimum apparently#LMAO I love this lil shit#marriage with my pc when#also did you know he’s going to be a neurosurgeon#he has brain underneath the pretty package?#yeah he’s my fav now#whitney the bully
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hoyo music casually being masterpieces is hardly a rare occurence BUT YOURE FUCKING KIDDING MEEE WITH THE NATLAN LIVE SYMPHONY HOLYSHIT 😭 I fanboyed. no other way to describe my excitement and giddyness. ITS SO FUCKING COOL ARE YOU SEEING THIS??? THE LYRICS THE MELODY THE SOULFULNESS 😭 my heart is so full...
I havent felt this way since I first heard Port Ormos theme (literally sounds like coming home. like songs from my childhood) and Sumeru's live symphony where I saw instruments from my culture 🥹 I can only imagine the same euphoria from other ppl who can relate to the culture presented in Natlan's live symphony will feel..
"In the end, you rekindle in ashes because of a dream."
BARSSSSS
#fuck the colorism in the character designs but goddamn they never miss with everything else#i was already incredibly happy they didnt go with the 'undeveloped savage tribalism' angle for Natlans worldbuilding (bare minimum)#and enviro#but the music... this is my first taste of it and holy frickkk ur kidding me#theyre peaking so hard#now if only the characters didnt look like that... though i have a sneaking suspicion theyre gona make me love them anyway :(#like how i warmed up to Nilou and Sumeru characters#despite them not looking like my people :'(#aishi.txt#anyway my heart is still pounding#the Natlan music is so goooood holy shit😭#hoyo always makes me conflicted arghhh#im gonna take inspo from redesigns if i ever make Natlan fanart mhdmhffm i was so set to skip this patch but 😭#they seem to be going all in for Natlan so i might as well stick around while its still summer break for me :')))
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He woke up in this bed. Or did he? It’s fuzzy now. He was somewhere before he was here. In an empty void. Dark. Infinite. Gorgug died. He knows he died.
He can’t be sure…
He can’t be sure he came back.
a sort of coda to sophomore year, gorgug-death-trauma style
#gorgug thistlespring#kristen applebees#dimension 20#d20#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year#fhsy#fantasy high fanfic#the bad kids#hiiiiii twirls hair around finger hiiii dimension 20 fandom here's my entry for d20 fic hope you like ittttt#i feel slightly insane rn because i just napped for like an hour 15 but at like 9pm and im still like half not really awake#and need to stay awake until i leave to catch my 5am train#and i have not packed and am sitting here at the kitchen table with a cup of tea at 10:30 pm posting fanfic instead#and trying to link ao3 on tumblr isnt actually even working right now so there's a good chance this goes in the drafts and i post it later#my hands feel like they specifically didnt fully wake up#anyway!#stuff#fic#my fic#d20 fic#fh fic#EDIT BEFORE POSTING: WOWWW FUCKING FINALLY!!!! FINALLY A PREVIEW!!!!! GO GIRL GIVE US THE BARE MINIMUM!!!!!#ok posting this finally. peace n love <333
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erm…..posting about an OC via a rushed shitpost was not on my 2025 bingo card!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂get it??? 😂😂😂because his name is bingo??(GETS SHOT)
these are all things he has done or has attempted to do so consider this the full intro post for that freak for now. he’s still too undercooked to fully introduce but damn I love him
#pdbc#I love him. he’s the sole descendant of a royal family and. if you’ll pardon the pun. is royally fucking things up for himself#he could do so much in life and instead decides to be the next Gordon Ramsay……..such wasted potential#did. did I ever mention that part of him. his clan is called the Ramsay clan after all#he wants to be Gordon Ramsay sooooo fucking bad…….#big theater kid gone wrong energy from him#so many of my posts this year have been pdbc related. it Will happen again.#< (in my defense I’m working on other non-pdbc stuff !! but pdbc stuff is easy to make because I don’t have to think about it)#once I’m not so burnt out I’m really excited to design bingo….not even going to attempt to rn#I hate designing outfits but I’m actually looking forward to his bc he has a horrid mix of royal garments and astereotypical butcher outfit#speaking of butchers. butcher vanity? great song absolutely fits him. cannot stop listening to it#surprisingly him being like. a literal cannibal isn’t even all he does. that’s just a…little quirk of his#like ya’d think him eating people would be more important but nah. he’s a POET and a MAGICIAN 😤😤#I’d say he’s one of the most evil characters but…..kinda all of my characters are#sure bingo tries to eat people and bomb people’s homes but there are side characters who put acid in the water supply and aren’t punished#so bingo’s just par for the course honestly#the best thing he’s ever done is install an air conditioning unit. there wasn’t one before bc Mole (his mom) didn’t like them—#—which resulted in people keeling over from heat exhaustion a lot so. good job for fixing that bingo#it’s the bare minimum but that’s pretty good for him so he can have a round of applause for that#I think I might have mentioned Gerbombs in passing but I love them sm#they’re gerbils genetically engineered to blow up when pressure is placed on them#they’re adorable. thankfully they have no concept of death so they’re just chilling with no worries in the world#before you get sad. Sushi rescued most of the Gerbombs and now cares for them so happy ending#no Gerbombs shall die under her watch. I don’t think I could deal with it if too many Gerbombs died#although they’re called Gerbombs they’re actually more physically close to jerboas#they’re so cute. I should draw a Gerbomb sometime#(I should also probably rename them jerbombs considering they’re not gerbils but ehhhhhhhhhhhhh)
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tooth pain will make u want to kys
#ive had it for up to seven months now and my dentist thinks it's bc of stress and clenching my jaw#its true im extremely tense#but i fear that coupled with my head bite malocclusion it has caused a fracture#idk what to do or how to check bc apparently fractures arent visible on xray#i dont wanna eat at all the whole day i just drink water then when i come home n try to eat the pain flares up n i lose all appetite#ive been crying about it every day for the past two weeks i feel like im losing my mind#like my dad cooked rice today i was so hungry i took two bites bit down on a seed or kernel and my chest immediately caved in#when i see my brother doing the bare minimum dental care no flossing nothing drinking only soda every day#not having been to the dentist in years never having had braces i want to cry even more#i love my teeth so much the way they look everything i cant stand that theres smth wrong with them
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i just need to ??? about a man
#today i had work coffee w [musician guy]#and we were v profesh/cordial to start#understandably it was awkward-- our first 1:1 convo#in like almost 3 years#and then we were talking about when i was so sick#and he said by the way sry about my dog he loved that died#and i kinda brushed it off like 'yea thank you'#and he got v teary and was like#'no i'm so sorry i'm really so sorry'#so here i am sipping my drink you know#and he's like 'i loved you so much. i was so scared. i'm sorry'#and i said 'it's okay [blond man]'#and i meant it???#and i recognize that this is the bare minimum#and that it took-- again-- almost 3 years#but he was actively hostile towards me for so long#that i feel like now at least we can exist in the same downtown#it was not a super personal convo! we don't need to ever have another super personal convo!#we don't even need to be friends!#but idk idk relief for me to be done with#i didn't even have to mention his wife having my face??#LONG DAY TBH!!!!!#tbd tbd tbd
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Magenta 😟
#I've had cognitive impairment from covid before but not to where i feel intellectually dumb when i write#my college papers and my writing projects dont sound like “me” as of late#its very bare bones and doesn't have the descriptiveness or humanity i normally give#like i see the scenes or what i want to say in my head#but what i type aint matching up#and yeah i naturally get into slumps like that but this is like that slump x 9000#I'm kinda scared this round might've given me brain damage#havent been feeling all the way like myself#but i also know too that covid takes a while to heal from and of course theres long covid shit which ive dealt with before#im just frustrated guys#i feel like within the last 3 to 4 months i finally healed from my last bout of rona#and i get it again and im back to square one#i just want to write and feel okay with it and not feel so stuck just trying to come up with a basic sentence#seriously even writing basic shit is hard right now#it took me a week to get 5 pages on duality#and im used to churning out at least 10 pages on my projects at minimum every couple days to a week#man give me chronic pain anyday but don't take away my mind and the freedom that comes with that#sorry guys im feeling sad#i know i gotta give myself time but im impatient#i hate how right before i caught covid again i was gonna get my flu shot and an updated covid vax#wish i could've avoided this crud#having weird chest shit too#was a heart thing now its gerd now its potentially back to a heart thing#im tired#i need a hug#i love you 🫂💙#magenta is my vent word
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Terribly upset that I am willing to put so much love and effort into a relationship and people aren't willing to put in slightly more than the bare minimum for me
#just salty about it. do people still say salty. thats the first time ive said it in quite awhile#anyway#i have problems with my body. my body is thr equivalent of a house that someone wanted to save money on#so they had their second cousin do the wiring. and now an actual electrician is walking around just shaking their head#the actual electrician is my doctors who are horrified at whats going on in there#but because i have shoddy wiring. people have to put a little more effort in than the bare minimum. its crazy#tmi sex mention ahead#there are various things that make it slightly different for me to have sex. not impossible. not even difficult really. just different#but do you think people are willing to work with those differences? nope. again its not impossible or even really difficult#but also one of the issues technically could be fixed. i dont want to fix it. it would be painful and difficult and i dont mind the issue#but people im with all want me to fix the issue. 'just fix the issue' no this is my body and i am not changing it for a 2 month relationship#also i got that long covid which drains my energy. stamina and endurance dont exist. so if i go on a walk or whatever#i need to rest more often than most people. again i can walk or be out. i just cant stand very long and need to take more breaks#it doesnt make things impossible or even too difficult. just different#am i crazy? am i asking for too much? for someone to love me enough to put in the effort to work with my differences?#i feel crazy considering why most of my exes have left#first- cuz im trans second- i left him we just werent a good match#third-cuz im trans fourth- changed her mind about a lot of shit really suddenly so ee no longer aligned#fifth- started as a long distnace relationship. knew that was the deal. decided she didnt like it#but tbh i wanted to leave her bcuz she didnt put any love care or effort into the relationship and i hated it#i think im going to become a nun actually. i think legally god has to love me no matter what#and he is in fact the electrician that fucked up the house of my body so it only seems fair#im realizing my explanation of my 4th ex doesnt explain it all. literally very siddenly she said she felt trapped#she said she didnt see a future with me and when i moved she wanted to open up the relationship#and another part of her wanting to open it was bcuz my body doesnt work the way she wanted it to for sex#so after literally three years after saying she wanted to marry me and such. literally a couple months after we discussed marriage#she dropped all of that shit on me. so i wasted three years there. im tired of relationships#im tired of this grandpa!#my exes and future partners: thats too damn bad!!
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I will be forever grateful i can be on this new med. it's one a lot of folks also need and can struggle to have access to! It's important i be on it, especially if i start doing any vid collabs
(some of which, really, all of which, i unfortunately actually need to cancel that were in the preplanning stages, bc the election results have me wanting to wait and see how the general atmosphere of the country is before i agree to meet up with anyone. I feel bad for cancelling, but also i just can't know for sure how safe things are/might be going forward and I'd rather avoid the potential of. ya know. various not great things that could happen at a meet up, tho i would certainly hope they wouldn't. i don't feel like actually addressing them rn, u guys know what i mean)
That said, if the truvada initial side effects could fuck off asap would be so lovely. three weeks at worst, then they should be gone/much better or so i am told. really hope that's true bc losing my mornings to being dizzy and nauseous is Not Working for me lmao. im on week two, and now understand why my new doc said to call if i needed any 'cheerleading' and support to get thru the side effects, bc apparently she's done that for several ppl to make sure they actually make it thru the three weeks and keep on it (lovely of her!!)
#text post#not going to get into the other painful smack of this morning#suffice to say that medicaid does not in fact fully cover vocal therapy/training for trans ppl#even if ur docs feel incredibly certain it is#if i was making a decent bit over minimum wage at consistent hours and already had my current debts paid off mostly#then I'd happily consider paying the chunk Medicaid won't cover but as of now#it would literally be basically two paychecks if not three to cover the estimate for this first visit#and that's only if the poll would have us polling every week like we did before the election#otherwise we're guesstimating it would be upwards of 4 paychecks to cover it#I'm actually gonna get into in here bc nobody reads all my tag essays (fair valid and correct)#im really sad abt this. my voice gets me clocked a lot and while i can mostly handle like. visually being clocked#my voice giving me away genuinely makes me feel a pain in my chest. i can't get my customer service voice to go lower yet#and even if it's my usual voice I've made minimal progress on my own self done vocal study stuff#so like. no one knows how high it was compared to how it is now tho so no one actually hears it as anything near deep#which it isn't but like. there's been a slightly barely there drop of it per at least a couple ppl in my life#i was probably going to be able to learn how to sing again and find my new range. I'd fix my customer service voice#even if it would only ever be a teeny bit lower than how it is now. it would be lovely#im not gonna get too down tho bc someday hopefully I'll be able to make it happen/afford it#and for now...im doing the bad thing of not cancelling the appt yet#i will bc they're booking out for months and it isn't right of me to take a spot i know i can't keep#but. let me pretend i can for another day or two. maybe until monday. then I'll call or msg them on mychart#and let them know i just don't have the funds rn tho i do deeply appreciate that Medicaid at least pays part of it#im just not at a point where i can cover the rest but that I'll reschedule/have a new referral sent whenever that changes#...and hopefully things in this country will be of such a state that such care is still available to ppl like me.#but that's all we're saying on that bc im already having a pathetic little cry over this#(im fine the med side effects have me crying over everything lol i see a sad commercial and Instant Tears like someone died lmaooo)
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loveee when a character is crushed under the weight of someone elses expectations for them love when a character dedicates their entire life to something they never even wanted for themself love when the only reason a character keeps going is because theyre Supposed to and bc theyre supposed to make another person happy/proud. YES !!! CLAPPING !!! YES !!!!!!!!
#this isnt rly related to any character in particular i just thought abt this and it made me scream.#flirting at a bar Damn girl you look like youre trapped in a life you built to please someone else. and then i kneel down and pull out a 💍#sry i ran out of space for the full word ring. also why when i type 💍 Ohh theyre hiding it. bc now the emoji is 💍 Oh they changed it again#pox on their home..originally it was 🔐 sughested emoji#but then the second time it was 😭.... very anti marriage. well ig maybe the sob could be like OMG... YES!!!!! I WILL MARRY YOU!!!!!!#ngl getting proposed to is such a big fear of mine like. i dont think id ever be able to propose to someone so id have to be proposed to i#suppose but it makes me quite nervous not bc im like ohh nooo dont propose i just rly worry ill react the wrong way and theyll change their#mind. like its a very high emotion moment so ik i would be supposed to be emotional And i would be but idk if id do it in the right way . y#idk. what if my autism looms and i end up just being like 😐 on accident. fuckkk. what if i say somethinf dumb. like i try to be like YES !#but instead im like YEP! god. can you imagine. id have to just bury myself at that point. so embarassing. or like what if i get excited and#flap my hands but it was supposed to be more of a like. joyful crying type of thing... or what if im supposed to just be shocked and like .#Oh my god ....#and am I supposed to run at them and sweep them into a hug or do they do thst to me. UGH. ITS SO STRESSFUL. i suppose ill just remain alone#forever so I never have to confront any difficult situations ever again . Joke .#idk it just makes me nervous. but i suppose hopefully the person proposing to me will love me . that would be nice so hopefully they wont#mind if i dont respond the right way . and they wont be upset with me bc they love me eversomuch. a girl can dream i suppose... my head lik#is pounding sry. i need to sleep probably.. stayed up too late again -_- 8am -_- and im sposed to do laundry today But i dont want to . and#since im gonna fall asleep i fear it shant happen. UGHHH#wtvr. idk what my ideal proposal would be likeee. i don't want to be blindsided ig#i like surprises but Obviously im too worried abt like. my immediate reaction#+ i think its important to talk abt marriage Before proposing just so everybodys like#on the same page and such. Obvs... but ya. i dont think id want a super public proposal like. id like it to be somewhere nice with maybs#significance to our relationship and such. and its fine if theres like Some passersby but id hate for it 2 be like. somewhere crowded. or i#a restaurant or something#Altho if it was in a restaurant maybe we could get free food..#but maybe that can be just fake proposals later on. and our real proposal can be somewhere else. YIPPEEE. me and my imaginary future spouse#who is To be honest rather bare minimum#normal girl will be like Wistful sigh maybe my future spouse will even love me and wont scream at me and will like to listen to me speak 😍#but anywyas. my beddybye time. SURPRISE GN POST#woahhthis got off topic i forgot what the original post was this always happens. i do love characters like that
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google search how do i stop missing her so much i can't breathe
#she's literally not all that. i am 100% out of her league.#i cannot stress how much this girl does not deserve to have me pining over her and missing her and crying about her months after the fact#my standards are SO low and she did not fucking meet bare fucking minimum#and yet i'm still like. she could call me and ask me to take her back and i'd do it in a heartbeat#anyway lol i had a dream about my ex girlfriend ibn which we were back together (and also both working at an aquarium?? idk)#and now i'm like. ugh.#also imagine asking out a kind loving girl who is head over heels in love with you and would do anything for you#treating her awfully and breaking her heart AND NOT EVEN GIVING BACK THE FUCKING BOOKS YOU BORROWED!#i'm just saying lol. i wish someone felt about me the way i feel about her#and i wish she wasn't so unbelievably fucking immature#and i wish i had better taste in women#and i wish i didn't still think about her alll the time#okay i'm done i swear i'm so done#talking to strangers on foreign phones
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