#love possessive male leads and female leads that reciprocate

[yandrness]

I love my yanderes insane, feral, cold, murderous, psychotic, apathetic, trigger happy – you name it. The reddest red flag on the field. But the condition to me liking that is that they have this tiny, tiny, TINY little permanent spot for their S/O that absolutely no one is allowed to touch, not even themselves.

I don’t want abusive assholes who claim they love S/O but do nothing but physically assault them. Ew no. I want an insane man who is softly, crazily, utterly obsessed over this significant other and loves them till it makes them physically nauseous. They try in their own way to love their S/O and sometimes they don’t even know it’s love, but they want everything that is their S/O – their tears, their blood, their sadness, their happiness. They will swallow and devour anything they can see. 

And as it turns out, their S/O’s smile and happiness is more intoxicating than anything else (like poison, like fungus, it latches into their insides and consumes them with a need for more more more MORE-).

[animeyanderelover]

Request: For my second request I would like for Haruhi (OHSHC), Misa (Death Note), Asa (Chainsaw Man), Uruaka (MHA), Kiyoko and Hinata (Haikyu), Rin and Bachira (Blue Lock), Illumi and Pokkle (HXH) where their darling is confessing to the yandere that they feel the same as them and return their feelings for them, but says they can't be together because they are both the same gender? and tells the yanderes “I wish you were a boy/girl?”

Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional behavior, manipulation, blackmailing, abduction, isolation, murder, female reader with female character, male reader with male character

Tags: @jamayah @chxxz @leveyani @hyakki-yosai @shenryu-sama @maggiequinn59 @killuagirly

I wish you were a boy/girl

Illumi Zoldyck

🤎​All you receive from Illumi after you have told him that the two of you can't be together because he is a man is that long and blank stare accompanied with the wonderful awkward silence that disables you to speak up. Frankly spoken, Illumi doesn't care too much about the fact that he has fallen in love with another man. No, he is quite confused instead as he doesn't understand why you instead reject him despite feeling the same. The way he tilts his head would be almost cute if his eyes wouldn't pierce your very soul at the moment. When he eventually asks you if you could explain it to him all whilst he finally blinks threateningly slow the tension in the air is so thick that you could cut it with a knife. No matter how you explain it to him though, your words hold no weight in his mind. The only thing that matters to him is the fact that you reciprocate his emotions and if someone within your surroundings stops the two of you, he will kill them. It's as simple as that. Once you are within the walls of the Zoldyck mansion Illumi will make sure that no one questions the two of you. As long as he fucks someone and has some heirs he is free to love whoever he wants after all.

Pokkle

🏹​Pokkle goes through the five stages of grief only that he never arrives at the stage of acceptance. He's in denial at the beginning because within all of his infatuation and all the insecurities somehow he never once considered that maybe you wouldn't feel attracted to him simply because he is of the same sex as you are. After the denial follows immediately the depression as he retreats from your sight. By no means is he avoiding you though, still stalking behind you though with a lot more grief within his heart. It's very likely that he is soon going to reach a breaking point though. You see, Pokkle is very much dependent on attention and love from his darling which will ultimately lead his mind to be able to only repeat one thing. That you still love him. Love conquers anything after all so why would you let yourself be stopped just because he is biologically a man? As soon as he starts drifting into that thought process it is over for you as that is the moment Pokkle will turn densely delusional out of desperation. An abduction will follow soon after as Pokkle is convinced that you just need to realise that it doesn't matter that the two of you are both men as he will prove to you that he is better than a woman.

Amane Misa

💄​Whatever it is that you say to her it all becomes irrelevant in her mind the moment you make the mistake of confessing to her that you feel the same as she does. Misa immediately latches on to those words as they are the only words she hears. Misa is awfully possessive of her darling and delusional to top it all which is a dangerous combination. The first thing that she does as soon as you have ended your speech is just give you a long and giddy kiss as she decides to ignore whatever it was you spoke after admitting to her that you love her too. Why, you may ask? Because it doesn't matter to her. You return her feelings and that is all that she really needs to hear and know. Still, it is not like she is completely oblivious as you notice that she is so much clingier and affectionate whenever the two of you are around other men. Her facade is still all cute smiles but there is that dangerous look in her eyes. Jealousy is as natural as breathing for Misa and if she believes that someone is threatening your relationship, she will write his name down in her Death Note. So even if you try to get together with a man, she will ensure that he is going to drop dead in the most gruesome way possible.

Uraraka Ochaco

🎈​Ochaco considered the two of you to be a wonderful match. You have known each other for so long after all. In her mind there has never been a question about who she would end up with later on in her life but she realises that she has been too optimistic when you tell her that you cannot see yourself with her because she is also a girl. She swallows it all down though and only gives you a weak smile, assuring you that it's alright. Obviously the relationship takes a turn for the worse between the two of you and she can't accept that. Something has to be done or else she is going to lose you completely. Obviously she will feel guilty the moment she starts subtly sabotaging and manipulating you but whenever she meets a guy you like, she is hard-wired to notice everything about him that you wouldn't like later on because she knows you too well. Small mistakes like inviting you to food that you don't like are already enough to have her doubt that you will be happy with him. She starts pointing out everything about appearance or personality on a guy that she knows you don't like and always speaks up when he does something you don't like to show you that she knows you best after all.

Hinata Shoyo

☀️​Being heavily delusional by nature, someone like Hinata is going to be difficult to handle when it comes to any type of rejection in general. All of it is made much worse though when you foolishly confess to feeling the same way as he does though. Even as you tell him that the two of you can't be together and even if his heart is hurting, Hinata doesn't feel any despair. How could he after all? If the love between the two of you is mutual after all then there is nothing he has to be worried about. That settles it in Shoyo's mind. The two of you are a couple and the very next morning he is totally going to act his part of it. He's elated, a bright grin on his face as he tells all his friends that you reciprocate his feelings. He's affectionate, grabs your hands and hugs you from behind. Rumors quickly spread which leave you no choice but to confront him, absolutely flabbergasted and in shock from what he has done. If you are going to get angry with him be prepared for the waterworks though as Hinata will just yell back that you told him that you loved him. Why does sex even matter then when the both of you feel the same? You... you wouldn't drop him only to be together with a girl after all, would you?

Shimizu Kiyoko

🖤​Kiyoko keeps a stoic expression when you admit to her your inner conflict before just giving you a curt nod and leaving. She is not someone who openly reveals her affection for you as she is for starters aware that her feelings aren't exactly your typical highschool romance and additionally she prefers observation as she would never confess mindlessly only to get her feelings hurt. In that moment she is glad that she has never revealed just how much you mean to her as otherwise things between the two of you would have been much more awkward. However, she is not completely hurt as the fact remains that you still love her too. That is something that she can work with. There is after all a path that can be taken in this situation and all she has to do is build it now. Perhaps it is time to step out of her shell and show you just how much she cares about you and how well she knows you. She will swiftly and bluntly point out everything at fault within a guy when you introduce him to her the moment she notices that he says or does something you are uncomfortable with all whilst she herself inserts herself more into your life, providing the support and assistance that you need in that moment.

Fujioka Haruhi

👑​Haruhi is to her defence not going to be your biggest worry that you have in the beginning. I would consider Tamaki to be the bigger menace at first when he finds out that Haruhi has been dumped by you because she is a girl. He's extremely protective of her and is most likely going to tell you multiple sob stories in the hope that you may reconsider your words. To Haruhi herself gender has never really mattered that much as she doesn't think that it should restrict someone within society, a very open-minded opinion that you don't seem to share. To her it has never mattered that you are a girl but it matters to you and a part of her understands where those prejudices may come from. It is not within Haruhi's assets to beat around the bush though, she is going to be very straightforward and ask you soon for a clearer reason for why exactly you can't be together with her. If you wouldn't be into girls it would be one thing but since you have confessed to her that you return her love she knows that this isn't the case which is why she is unwilling to give up. She's still friendly and welcoming but Haruhi is very stubborn and the topic will come up in conversations since she doesn't see the need to lie.

Mikata Asa

▪️​Asa isn't in general known as someone who deals with failure or anything that doesn't go her way very well so this is initially not going to end up any better. The moment you tell her that you can't be together with you her initial reaction is to simply insult you and everyone she knows you have a friendly relationship with. All of her pain is buried deep within as she exposes her mean-spirited side before she walks away with her chin held high. Her meltdown only happens once she is all alone and has no one to project her pain on anymore, spiralling down into her hole of insecurity and self-hatred. She wants to prove herself as worthy, she wants you to choose her but she lacks any comprehension of social skills to do so. However, if there is one thing that she latches on to it is the fact that you admitted that you still love her even though you can't be with her. That has to mean something, doesn't it? It's those words she clings to, it's those words that push her to go on with a constant mixture of anger, jealousy and hope within her. She stalks you everywhere you go, she insults every man that gets too close with you all whilst she tries in a severely wrong attempt to show you her worth.

Bachira Meguru

💛​I'll just be honest and say right away that he is not going to care about what you have to say. Bachira gladly allows his delusional streak to solve all problems for him which allows for such an unmatched level of optimism which you would better not break. You just have to make it worse by admitting to him your own feelings which only solidifies everything within Bachira's thoughts as his actions from that day on are justified. You love him so there should be no problem at all for any of his actions after all. If you try to avoid him the best of luck because this guy is going to pop up everywhere where you are. Not to mention the lovely surprise visits that he likes to do, appearing unannounced in front of your door and asking to be let in with a grin on his face. He's so handsy with you, it is almost maddening. Meguru is constantly touching you somehow. He jumps on your back from behind, he tugs at your sleeves when he wants attention, he grabs your hand in his and drags you away from someone that he finds annoying. You're not going to be able to shake him off as Meguru is the human definition of a leech who won't let go. His behavior is very risky to be honest.

Itoshi Rin

🩵​Differently from Bachira Rin is much more subtle with everything though perhaps that is going to make him more dangerous than disturbing. He leaves you alone after your rejection but you would misjudge the situation severely if you were to believe that he is trying to accept everything. It's actually the complete opposite as Rin tries to tame his own demons and think of a way to get you back to his side. He can't let things slip through his hands, he can't let every single person leave him in the dust just because he isn't enough, isn't what others want him to be. It's that desperation that drives him quite far in any attempt to assure that you don't get any saying. What I'm trying to say is that after having watched the second season and having seen his flow that I believe Rin to get very destructive when he snaps which then puts everyone around you at a risk because his sole drive then is to destroy everyone who stands in his way. He starts blackmailing all sorts of people and he won't even have enough care left to spare your closed ones and you yourself get a very good slice of this ugly side of his that contrasts his normal stoic behavior on every single level.

[somerandomdere]

Yan! reader x second female lead! darling

warnings: implications of suicide, slight angst, mentions of reader's obsessive behaviour, worried its too long so I split it into 2 parts I know I'm supposed to be working on requests but I can't get this idea out of my mind :(

You have reincarnated into a world of your comfort otome game, The Wind Falls. You played this game over and over in your previous life, not because the storyline was great or anything, but because of your favourite character, the second female lead, Aleena.

She's everything you'd dream to have in a girlfriend. Kind, diligent, loyal and warm. You just couldn't understand why the main character never chose her. However, no matter what choice you pick, you never ended up with her.

This caused you to obsess over her, filling your bedroom with her pics from ceiling to the floor, praised her in every forum you are in, psycho analysing her personality and micro expressions to everything about her. She was your comfort character, your warm home, everything to you. You wish someone like her will come to you in real life, so you could escape from this hell.

Every time you went home and got beaten up, you played your favourite scenes of her. Every time you got bullied at your school, watching her made you forget about your bruises and pain. On your darkest days, she was your light.

But you know she will never appear in real life, for such an angel does not exist in this society.

So you decided to go to her.

By jumping in front of a speeding truck.

"Fuck..." You opened your eyes, and found yourself in a classroom. The sun was blazing, the rays blinding your eyes. Your skin was sticky, and you were sweating all over. You feel your muscles aching, did this body run a thousand miles or something?

You lent another student's pocket mirror to take a good look at your appearance. You possessed the body of an athletic student. No wonder you were sweating so much. Fit, slim and muscular, this was the body type you were constantly praying to have in your previous life.

Maybe you can start over.

After returning the pocket mirror, you scanned the people in your class. When your eyes landed on Aleena, it felt like the world slowly came to a stop. Your angel was in the same universe as you, and she was even more beautiful than in the game! Dark, cascading curls fell over her shoulders and her long eyelashes fluttered as she revises her homework she had to hand up later on. You were in ecstasy, even drugs could never replicate this happiness and love you felt for her.

"Quiet down class! I have an important announcement to make. We have a new student who came all the way from the UK! Please introduce yourself!" You snapped out of it and returned your attention to the teacher, even though your heart was thumping.

A boy about the same height as you, wears a frown on his face as he introduced himself as Elias. He was dark, brooding, mysterious, definitely would be male lead of any novel he's in. And as you guessed, his name sounded very familiar. Elias, the male lead of The Wind Falls, also the character you play when playing the game. To be honest, to you, he looked really overrated. Your heart only belongs to Aleena and no one else.

Looking at Aleena, you could already tell she was smitten by him. Her pupils turned into a heart like something out of a cartoon, and she was blushing intensely.

But of course, as the second female lead, she never had a chance with him. His assigned seat was beside the snobbish, rich and tsundere girl, Angela, also known as the female lead of the game.

You realised you never had a chance with Aleena as you were just a mob in this game realm. Yet you wanted to see her smile. you didn't need her to reciprocate your feelings, as long she's happy, you're happy. And you will do anything to achieve this.

A few days later, Aleena tries to win Elias over with some home cooked food, but unluckily for her, Angela thought of the same idea. When Aleena was trying to muster up the courage to give Elias the lunch, Angela cuts in and with her usual arrogant look, sets down her 9 tier lunch in front of him.

Watching from afar, you could tell Aleena felt defeated looking at that glamorous lunchbox. You honestly wanted to permanently get rid of Angela so Aleena and Elias could have their happy ending. Elias, opens the glamorous lunchbox, and the food inside...was so unlike the outside. Burnt to a crisp, the food didn't look appetising at all. Nevertheless, Elias told Aleena he will eat hers another day and chose Angela.

You were boiling mad. Doesn't he see how much effort Aleena had put for him? Didn't he see her hands that were covered in band aids? Doesn't he know how early she must have woken up to prepare the lunchbox for him? While Angela dared to feed the one she supposedly loved with burnt food that was pretty much charred and could possibly cause food poisoning, Aleena gave her all and only gave the best to him. Yet he chose Angela over Aleena. He doesn't deserve her, you thought.

At this moment, Aleena runs out of the classroom, and Elias didn't even glance at her. Worried about Aleena, you chased after her.

"Hey...your lunchbox looked pretty good. You don't mind if I finish it for you right? It's bad to let food go to waste. Besides, I forgot my wallet today and I'm pretty hungry." You pretended to nonchalantly start a conversation with her.

Targeting her kind heart was foul play, but it worked. She gave her lunchbox to you her hand her hand her hand and both of you headed up to the roof together. As you ate her lunchbox, you could feel the warmth and love she had for Elias. All of Elias's favourite food, nice prepared in an elegant manner he would love you wish it was for you. As Aleena cried about how Elias will never look her way, you didn't want to discourage Aleena and wanted to resist the temptation to kill Elias, came up with a plan. You will set Aleena up with Elias.

There's a reason why you're a yandere. Anything for your darling

reference from the manga oneshot Make Heroine wo Katasetai! taglist: @suiana @forbidden-sunlight @allurilove @mightypossibly @hana-no-seiiki @yxami @maleyanderecafe @moyazaika @losersiren @faux-ecrivain @oct0bra1ns @lizzaneia-elizalde @misstycloud @purerae @puripurin @darling--core @heartfullofleeches @godnectar @yandere-writer-momo @lovverletters @loveydoveysunray also tell me if you want to be tagged. I got this idea from other writers :)

Guys, I'm working on part 2 of yandere actor x crew reader and some requests so don't worry! It's my break now, I finally have time to write.

Also, notice how I bolded every mention of Aleena because reader is obsessed with her. And they never bolded their own name because Aleena is much more important to them than anything else.

Also, I appreciate feedback! PLS PLS PLS GV FEEDBACK

[slytherintrikru]

|| First Time || (‘It Wasn’t A Dream’  part 2)

— Part 2 —

Pairing: Severus Snape x gryffindor!student!reader (SHE’S OF AGE) 

Word Count: 5206

Warnings: SMUT, NSFW, 16+, dry humping, fingering, clit rubbing, cock in Vigina, male and female, adult content, adult language, cuss words, cum swallowing, fluff, out of character snape, newly graduated student, professor, younger woman with older man, first time, first kiss, kissing, hickeys, both are virgins. (SHE IS OF AGE) 

Summary: Y/N and Severus have been dating for three months. She has just found out she graduated Hogwarts, will Severus and her celebrate in a special way? Read to find out. (SHE’S OF AGE)

Requested: by no one this is my idea 

A/N: Hello, my fellow Dreamers, hope you like part 2 of ‘It Wasn’t A Dream’. This part might have smut, but you have to read to find out..😏 BTW I also already posted this on my AO3 account @ slytherintrikru. ( PS: hope you don’t mind I called you guys dreamers. I wanted my readers to have a name instead of being just ‘readers’ or followers’)

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Y/N's heart raced with excitement as she dashed down the corridors of Hogwarts, her footsteps echoing through the ancient stone walls. Passing her 8th year was an incredible achievement, especially considering the tumultuous years when Voldemort had threatened the school and everyone in the wizarding and muggle world. A mixture of disbelief and pride surged within her; she couldn't believe she had not only survived but thrived in the magical world. With the recent defeat of Voldemort by Harry Potter, a renewed sense of hope permeated the air. Y/N's destination was the dungeons, where Severus Snape, her devoted boyfriend, resided. The thought of seeing him made her steps quicken even more. She couldn't wait to share her accomplishment with him, someone who understood her struggles and dreams. As she hurried towards his private chambers, she imagined how they would celebrate her graduation from Hogwarts together, cherishing the moments that lay ahead.

She’s hoping to Merlin that they could celebrate by taking things further in their relationship.

Y/N and Severus had been entwined in a love that felt as though it had existed for far longer than three months. Despite the simplicity of their interactions—conversations that danced between intellect and laughter, and passionate moments that left them breathless—they couldn't quench their thirst for one another. It was a love born of mutual admiration and deep understanding. Y/N was wholeheartedly enamored by Severus, his every word and touch etching deeper into her heart. Her desire to build a life with him, to be his partner in every sense of the word, consumed her thoughts. With every tender kiss and whispered confession, he reciprocated her feelings, the unspoken understanding between them affirming their connection. Y/N longed to make him see himself through her eyes, to recognize the extraordinary beauty he possessed, both inside and out. Their love was a tapestry woven with unwavering devotion, a promise of forever that left them yearning for nothing more than each other's embrace.

In those transformative three months, their connection deepened immeasurably, leading to revelations that brought them closer than ever. With a profound sense of vulnerability, they confessed that they were both virgins, their body’s unclaimed by anyone before. Y/N, despite her curiosity, had never allowed herself the exploration of pleasure, each attempt leaving her searching for something more profound. Severus, too, had kept his desires in check, his solitary moments reserved for relief rather than intimacy. But as their love flourished, so did their longing to bridge the gap between them physically. Today held the promise of a change they both yearned for desperately, the culmination of their shared desires and the day Y/N had eagerly anticipated since the moment her feelings were laid bare. 

She just hopes that it’s the day where she and him could make love. She's been daydreaming about it for a while and each time she created scenarios her body and mind would scream for to go to him.

Y/N's heart raced as she finally reached his chambers, her anticipation pulsating with each breath. With an eager hand, she swiftly opened the door, her eagerness spilling into the room. The door closed with a resounding thud, and her voice burst forth, calling out for her beloved Severus. "Severus!" she exclaimed, her voice filled with a mixture of longing and excitement, the sound of her own voice echoing off the walls of his private haven.

“Sev! Severus!” She yelled for him again, waiting with intensity as she heard his bedroom door open abruptly. He stepped out of the room and before he could even get a word in, Y/N ran and flung her arms around Severus, almost knocking both of them over in the process. Luckily Severus caught himself and instantly wrapped his arms immediately. 

“Hi, love.” He whispered for only her to hear, as if there was no else in the world but them, her smile widened even more hearing his rough, sexy voice in her ear. “I take it you’ve seen your grades?”

“Yes! I graduated, Severus. I did it Sev!” She happily said. She pulled back looking into his dark chocolate brown eyes. She saw as his smile widened across his face and his eyes twinkled with love and admiration as he looked at her.

“I’m proud of you, my little one.”  He whispered for only her to hear. His smile was as bright as hers while saying this. His hands were rubbing her softly on her back up and down. She felt relaxed with him doing that, she loved this side of him so very much.

“I couldn’t have passed my exams if it wasn't for your encouragement, Severus. You helped me a lot!” She said, letting her hands slide up and around his neck and through his shoulder-length ink black hair. Severus sighed at the feeling at her soft and gentle touch before speaking again.

“It was all you, little one, I merely helped. You’re the one who studied and successfully passed. You did all the work, little love.” He said, pulling her as close as he possibly could while tightening his grip almost as if she was going to disappear at any moment and never return to him again.

Without realizing what she was saying she spoke the three words neither of them had spoken, “I love you.” She muttered, she stopped with what she was doing and froze looking shocked as ever, scared to stare into his eyes. This is the first time I ever spoke that out loud, she thought. After a few moments she finally looked at Severus, his smile was gone, he had the same expression as hers on his face. oh no I ruined the moment. She thought. “I’m s-“ she started to speak but was cut off by him.

“I love you too, my precious one.” He said, now smiling again. Kissing the top of her head.

“Really?” She happily questioned. Staring into his dark brown eyes trying to find an answer for her simple question.

“Yes really, I have been meaning to tell you, but you’ve beat me to it.” He muttered, leaning in kissing her lips softly, the kiss was so soft it was as if he was making a wish with a dandelion, before pulling away. His hands moved from her back and found a place on her hips, squeezing lightly.

Time seemed to stand still as Y/N and Severus locked eyes, a silent exchange of emotions passing between them in those fleeting moments. The air was charged with an unspoken understanding, their gazes speaking volumes that words could never capture. In the hushed intensity of their connection, Severus leaned towards her once more, their lips meeting in a kiss that held the promise of countless unspoken desires. The touch was gentle yet electric, a fusion of tenderness and urgency that encapsulated their longing. 

The kiss became more and more needy by the second, it started to become needy in a sexual way, it wasn’t just a normal snogging session. As he finally surrendered to the pull that had drawn them together, the world around them faded, leaving only the exquisite sensation of their lips meeting in a union of shared affection. 

Y/N was flushed, she was more flushed than she was when they shared their first kiss a few months ago, “I want to have sex with you.” She bluntly told him. She looks away embarrassed about her outburst of words.

Severus grabs her chin gently, making her look at him. 

“You do? Do you want to take this further, my baby girl?” He asked, smirking.

“Yes please make me feel good, Sev.” She muttered honestly, looking lovely at him. 

“Ok, my little butterfly, but if you start to feel uneasy just tell me and I’ll stop.” She nodded in response.

Her gaze shifted between his lips and his eyes, a magnetic pull drawing her back and forth. Without hesitation, she crushed her lips against his once more, the kiss ignited with an insatiable fervor. In response, he met her passion with an intensity that mirrored her own, his lips moving in perfect harmony with hers. A hand slid to the back of her head, pulling her closer, while the other found its way to her ass, the heat of his touch electrifying her senses. Stepping backward, he guided her until her back met the cool solidity of the wall, the embrace intensifying their connection. His tongue traced the contour of her lower lip, a silent request for entry that she willingly granted, allowing him to explore the depths of her mouth. A subtle struggle for dominance unfolded as their tongues danced, an unspoken battle that she ultimately relinquished to him. Slowly, his lips embarked on a journey downward, leaving a trail of heated, moist sensations along her jawline, inching closer to the tender spot at her throat that begged to be found.

She moaned, he smirked knowing that he has found the spot that makes her whimper for him and only him. Her hands moved towards his hair and she tightened her grip in his soft and fluffy hair causing the man to growl in response, he slapped her ass. A whine left her lips, making him smirk.

“My eager little princess, moaning for me and only me. Now be my good little angel girl and take what you want.” He hissed into her ear seductively. The hand that he had in her hair moved from her head, and made its way down towards her shorts, pulling them back quickly, before sticking his hand completely into her shorts and underwear. His thumb found its way to her clit, rubbing her bundle of nerves slowly causing her to let out a soft moan. “Yes, my darling little one. Moan for me. Just for me, ONLY for me.” He said tighten his hold on her with his other arm.

He pushed his thumb harder into Y/N’s clit, rubbing tight and slow circles as he kissed and nipped at her neck, making her feel pleasure she has never felt a day in her life. She lifted one of her legs and tightly wrapped it around his waist bucking her hips into his hand so she could get as much pressure on her clit as possible. Y/N wanted his mouth on her neck again, kissing her skin, so she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling slightly, causing his face to fall forward burying it on the side of her neck. Severus growled again, getting the jester, her lover attached his lips to her neck sucking on her neck.

“Please Sev! Please.” She gasped, as she moans at the new feeling he was making her feel.

“Does this feel good my angel? Does this make you want to cum? Hmm?” Speeding his thumb up more as his middle finger made its way to her opening, entering her swiftly yet softly, making her jump a little from the new pressure, his middle finger stilled for a moment and then he started to move in a come here motion. When he felt Y/N start to move her hips into his hand faster, his middle finger sped up. He spoke again, “That’s it, my sweet sweet love, move your hips and rub that pussy on my hand, take what you want from me. My little angel, your pussy feels so fucking good and my cock hasn’t even entered you yet.” 

She did as he told her and started moving even faster, moaning and panting at the way he was making her feel. Y/N moved harder when she felt this odd sensation in her abdomen. It felt like her insides was doing flips, she likes that feeling. He felt her velvety walls squeezed around his finger and he sped up his pace in her tight, soft, wet hole while he added more pressure to her clit making sure her pussy throbbed for him more. This is the first time she has felt like this down there and it feels so good. She wants more. She continued to rub her pussy on his hand making sure to add pressure to her bundle of nerves so she’ll be able to feel that pleasure in her abdomen again. FUCK! fuck, want more of him, just him, only him. Feels so good. He makes me feel so good, so wet. Her thoughts were cut by the sound of her own moans. Her mind spinning in circles while pussy was pulsing around his thick finger and it felt spectacular.

“Yes! Oh Merlin, yes. Severus don’t stop I- you feel so- awh.“ she pulled him tightly against as she was stopped by her own cry of pleasure, she felt a hot liquid spill from her pussy all over his hand and her underwear. I came already? She thought. Her face turned a bright shade of red, she felt embarrassed that she couldn’t hold it in and that she came that quickly.

Instead of moving his hand he let out a deep groan while she was cumming all over his hand as he continued to add even more pleasure to her clit so she’ll be able to ride out her high, which he caused. He started to kiss and bite at her neck while making his way down her chest leaving hickies so everyone will know she belongs to him and him only. His arm around her squeezed her delicately as he held her body to him not wanting to move.

Finally, removed his hand and pulled back just enough so she’ll be able to see him stick his fingers in his mouth, tasting her juices while moaning and groaning as he did so. He quickly pulled his fingers out of his mouth and kissed her passionately letting her know she did good for him. He finally pulled away looking at her beautiful face, smirking at the way her eyes was barely open and mouth agape. Knowing it was him who did this to her made him brim with pride. So fucking beautiful. He thought.

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen and heard.” He breathed out, her eyes opened fully and she saw his pupils was dilated. Y/N could hardly see his brown onyx eyes anymore. When her eyes met his that was when he saw the look in her beautiful eyes, he instantly knew what she was feeling and said, “Don’t second guess yourself, little one, what you just did was dangerously sexy.” He kissed her lips again. 

She felt the weight on her chest lift at his words.

“That felt so amazing, Severus I never felt like that in my lifetime and I want more Sev, please give me more. Please.” She begged almost moaning in the process. “Make me yours completely Sev. Fuck me hard and fast into the bed.” 

In a moment of involuntary movement, her hips shifted forward against his hard clothed cock, causing him to let out a suppressed moan. Her own nervousness showed as she tentatively pressed closer, her breath catching at the sensation. Amidst the uncertainty, her body's response had soaked through her underwear and shorts, revealing her arousal. Severus leaned his head back, absorbing the overwhelming sensations, letting a hint of pleasure course through him. He proceeded cautiously, wanting to ease her into the experience without causing any pain. Their hips began to sway together, a mixture of curiosity and excitement in the air as they both emitted soft, unsure sounds. The rhythm intensified, and he pushed against her a bit more urgently, feeling the tension build. Their movements became faster, though they retained a degree of innocence in their exploration. They moan loudly at the new feeling. Gently, he held her hips to still their motion, preparing for the next step. With a nervous yet determined resolve, he lifted her and guided her towards the bedroom, laying her down as he hovered above. In the safety of that private space, they continued their intimate movements, her legs wrapping around his hips to bring him closer, both of them navigating new territory with a mix of apprehension and anticipation.

He battles with the urge to halt, recognizing the need for restraint, even as the tantalizing sensation of her moist core against him remains irresistible. Pausing for a brief moment, he hurriedly removes his own clothes, seeking her permission with an inquisitive glance. With an eager nod, she signals her consent. Swiftly, he undresses her, mindful of her comfort, and then he grasps his firm, long, thick, & hard cock. Gently inserting himself between her folds, they resume their rhythm of gentle grinding. He pays careful attention to ensure the tip of his shaft presses against her sensitive areas, particularly her clit, generating pleasurable pressure against her bundle of nerves. Y/N becomes captivated by the sensations, as if she's been transported to an ethereal realm she never wishes to depart from. The seamless glide of his impressive length along her folds, the precise alignment that brings the tip of his member into contact with her clit, all contribute to her enchantment. Amidst her heightened arousal, her moans escape once more, and she clings tightly to him, wrapping her legs around his form in a blend of desire and trepidation.

“Feels. So. Good.” With each word he said he thrusted harder than the last causing her to moan into his ear. The bed started to shake at how hard and fast he was pushing into her. His cock sliding and pushing against her whole pussy that has become wetter than before letting him easily move against her folds. The veins on his cock were becoming more evident. He loudly moaned into her ear feeling so much pleasure from the way they were rubbing together. She loves that sound.

He bucked his hips into her, rubbing his already hard cock against her humping as fast and as hard as he could. He slipped his hand between them, opening her pussy lips so she could feel his cock on her throbbing core. She moaned. The way he made sure his cock was hitting her clit every time he moved his dick into her was making her see stars in her eyes. Her eyes disappeared into the back of her head at how good he was making her feel. She couldn’t get enough and wanted more so she started moving her hips as well adding on to the pleasure. Her nails dug into his back making Severus hiss in pleasure and pain. Even dry humping feels good to her. Fuck her cunt feels so amazing against me. His eyes slowly closed from the pleasure as he just lived in the moment feeling so good at what he was receiving and loving ever second of it.

“Awh, fuck, fuck, fuck. That’s it, baby harder.” She moaned, coping him by pushing harder and faster into him when she said each word.

He pressed into her with force, a fervent desire to draw as close as physically possible evident in his movements. His weight bore down on her as he thrust, the pulsating ache of his erection yearning for fullness within her, though restraint held him back. His primary focus lay in preparing her for the impending connection. Unrestrained, he persisted in their dry humping, the friction intensifying as he pressed firmly against her, attuned to her moans that seemed to implore him for equal pleasure. Encouraged by her engagement, she matched his rhythm, enhancing their mutual experience with the urgency of her own movements.

“Do. You. Like. The. Way. My. Cock. Feels.” He said thrusting a lot faster with each word he spoke, putting as much weight on her cunt as he possibly could, making her bundle of nerves throb and tingle even more. She moaned out a ‘yes’ feeling intoxicated by his big cock. He moved back slightly before thrusting hard towards her causing her to whine out. He growled back in return.

Before words could escape either of them, a shared moan erupted as they reached a climax in tandem. As the echoes of their orgasms subsided, she resumed her movements against him, driven by an unquenchable desire. Clinging tightly with her legs, she intensified her grinding, an urgent determination guiding her actions. She seemed possessed by an insatiable craving for him, an overwhelming force that resisted any attempt to halt. Each motion was driven by an unyielding need for more, a single focus on him alone. Her attentiveness to his pleasure remained evident as she maneuvered, ensuring his substantial length struck precisely against her bundle of nerves. The fervor of her actions escalated, pressing him further against her in a testament to her yearning. Her hand ventured downwards to the point of connection, exerting pressure upon him that elicited twin whimpers of shared longing. Progressing with unabated eagerness, her fingers encircled him, stimulating the head of his erection with unrelenting intensity against her clit.

“Love, you have to stop so I can continue getting you ready to take my cock in your tight cunt.” He muttered, while breathily moans escaped his lips and filled her ears turning her on even more. Her pussy feels so good on my cock though, he thought. He moaned lowly again feeling her pussy heat on him when she pushed his whole dick against her wetness.

“No! No! Please more, I don’t wanna stop. I want to feel good again, Sev. I want to cum again, please keep going.” She begged “Please, so good, almost there,

your cock feels so damn good on my cunt.”

“I will make you cum again, love,  but you have to stop for a second.” Her hips stilled waiting for his next move she felt him lift her up so he could sit on the bed this time, his hand moving towards her clit to rub circles again. Y/N moans loudly, making Severus smirk and speed up his movements with his hand. She felt the familiar feeling in the pit of her stomach again, Severus noticed and stopped his movements. She whines at the loss. 

“W-W-Why did you stop!” She whimpers, trying to get more friction on her clit, but he held Y/N still and flipped her over on the bed. He was on top of her now, between her legs. Severus smirked at how eager she was.

“I’m not even close at being done with you, my slutty princess. This time, I’m burying my big cock inside of your wet tight little cunt. I want you to moan my name as you squeeze me and milk my cock with your cum until you go dry. My beautiful horny girl. Are you ready to take my cock, love?” He questioned in a low yet deep dark voice. Almost growling like a wild animal in the process. He looks into her beautiful E/C eyes. She nods eagerly. “I need you to use your words, my beautiful queen.” 

She blushed, “Yes, please, I need you in me!”

“Ok, my sweet, but if you feel uncomfortable in any way just like me know and I’ll stop.” He said, she nods in response. 

He resumed a trail of kisses, traveling along her neck before descending toward her breasts. As he reached them, his lips enclosed around one, sucking with a purposeful intensity on the erect bud while manipulating and fondling the other. The sensation drew her body upward, arching off the bed to amplify the friction between them. A sharp hiss of discomfort escaped her lips when he bit down on her nipple, momentarily shifting her focus. Simultaneously, his other hand ventured downward, finding its destination at her soaked entrance. Though she winced at the heightened sensitivity from her twice-repeated climax, he collected the evidence of her pleasure on his hand, then brought it to her mouth, prompting her to taste herself. In response, her moans of mingled vulnerability and desire filled the air.

One of his hands was placed by her head, while the other moved its way down toward his cock, grabbing it. His lips moved from her chest making their way towards her neck again, kissing and sucking feverishly.

He started to rub the red swollen tip of his cock on her pussy getting ready to fuck get into the bed. He groaned loudly while he rubbed his dick against her, feeling pleasure in doing so. Moving his cock up and down her soft pussy. He circled his cock around her opening before moving toward her sensitive clit. He has never expressed this desire before nor has she and it felt like he was on cloud 20 not 9, 20. It felt almost like a dream he never wanted to wake up from. A dream where they fuck for infinity and never stop no matter how much it hurts. He rubbed harder as his pre- cum started to drip and cover her pussy with his arousal.

“Do you want me to go slow and easy or do you want me to slam into you hard and fast to get the pain over with as soon as possible?”

“Start off slow, then slam into me hard and fast. I can take it, Sev.” He nodded.

Moving his cock towards her wet entrance he slowly let the tip of his dick slide in. After he slid in a bit he pulled back out and then pushed back in not going all the way in just enough so she’ll be able to feel what he’s about to do. He continued that for a while making her a moaning and squirming mess underneath him before she was begging for more.

Without warning he pulled back a little than harshly slammed back into hard making her yelp in pain but pleasure as well his hips stilled for a moment. Damn she’s so fucking tight and wet. Calm down Severus it’s her first time as well as yours but this hurts her more than me don’t fuck it up, his thoughts ran wild.

As the discomfort subsided, she initiated a gentle rotation of her hips, an act that symbolized her gradual acceptance of him, and only him. Sensing the opportune moment, he withdrew and reentered with an intensified force, evoking harmonized moans from both of them. Sustaining his vigorous rhythm, he maintained a powerful and relentless pace, delving as deeply as the confines of her tightness would allow. Every thrust conveyed an unspoken connection, a tangible presence of his entirety within her. She feels so fucking warm, fuck, her pussy is squeezing me so tight my dick might fall off. Her velvety walls feel like heaven, He thought. He moans loudly in Y/N ear, making her even more wetter.

In that intimate moment, she experienced the sensation of his pulsating presence brushing against her moist core, moving with urgency and intensity. Her impassioned cries resonated loudly, resembling almost a scream, matched by his deep groans and primal responses to the symphony of her pleasure. The connection they shared overwhelmed them, a profound sense of affection enveloping them both.

So good this feels even better than the other. “Awh- oh fucking hell- sev.” She uttered out breathlessly.

“My sweet girl, your pussy feels so good it makes me want to stay inside you forever. You’re squeezing me so tight I can tell you’re close to my little love bug. Release for me, angel.” He moaned out, he thrusted into her deeper with each word.

He accelerated his rhythm, pushing himself to the limits, relentlessly thrusting into her with an intensity that made both them and the bed quiver. The sensation of her enveloping him so snugly heightened his pleasure, and although this was unfamiliar territory for him, the connection between them felt instinctive and seamless. Even Lily paled in comparison to the depth of emotion he shared with Y/N, rendering those memories insignificant in comparison. Lily was nothing compared to Y/N, he thought.

“I love you, S-Sev! I love you so much!” She moaned breathlessly in his ear.

“I love you too, my little darling.” He responded, thrusting faster into her pussy. Her eyes roll to the back of her head as she moans.

They both experienced a blazing sensation of pleasure, as if their insides were ablaze. He intensified his movements, going deeper and more vigorously, causing their moans to become louder and more intense. He was aware that their sounds probably echoed throughout the entire castle, but he paid no attention. He quickened the rhythm of his thrusts, feeling the ebb and flow of his body against hers, ensuring his movements hit just the right spot. His abdomen was rubbing against her swollen clit. Despite any discomfort, she was resolute in her desire for this connection, wanting to be with him in this way indefinitely.

He entered her with a newfound intensity, thrusting deeper and quicker than before. It was as though his body was moving beyond his control, like the effects of the Imperius Curse. His desire for more was insatiable—he craved a union so passionate that they would be left exquisitely sensitive and spent. His wish was to continue until both were thoroughly exhausted from their shared climax. He longed for his essence to spill into her, finding its way to her womb, leading to the possibility of her carrying his child and her abdomen swelling with the promise of new life.

“Feels so good. Can’t stop. Can’t st-“ He caught his breath, a gasp lodged in his throat, and nuzzled his face into the curve of her neck, gently nipping it as a deep, guttural groan escaped him. His hips moved erratically as he released thick ribbons of his cum into her, and in response, Y/N climaxed as well, coaxing every last drop from him. Her pussy embrace held him so snugly that his movements were almost restrained.

He eased his full weight onto her as they both took a moment to catch their breath after their passionate encounter. A serene relaxation enveloped them, making the idea of moving seem undesirable to both. However, Severus recognized the necessity of tending to their cleanliness and preparing for sleep. He began to shift and rise, only for Y/N to emit a plaintive whimper, her grip on him tight.

“Where are you going?” She quipped.

“I’m just going to get a rag to clean us up, my lovely girl.” She nodded letting him go.

He swiftly rose and retrieved a damp cloth, using it to gently cleanse her pussy. She winced as he touched her oversensitive and swollen clit. "I know, my love. You're alright," he reassured her. He then flipped the cloth to its other side, cleaning his softened cock before discarding the cloth onto the floor. Once he finished, he returned to bed to join her.

He drew her near, her head finding a comfortable spot on his chest. As she began to drift into slumber, the sound of his heartbeat echoed in her ears. He tucked them both under a blanket, whispering, "Sweet dreams, my love." He muttered. With a sense of profound relaxation, he too succumbed to sleep, feeling a tranquility he had never experienced before.

[sanctissimx]

get to know the mun ! repost, don’t reblog.

——— BASICS ! ♡

NICKNAME : Saint !

PRONOUNS : they/them !

ZODIAC SIGN : Cancer sun, Aquarius Moon, Gemini rising

TAKEN OR SINGLE : single parent to a sweet himbo cat, adopted parent to Hawk's shitty cat son and adorable booger princess daughter

ANYTHING ELSE? : uppity Southeast Asian danger queer who talks too much shit for someone wearing pastels, except I can fight. And bake.

——— THREE SERIOUS FACTS ! ♡

Quality of writing is all I really care about, so if I followed you, it's because I want your writing on my dash !

I am not here to be normal about ur muse. I want to know everything about them, I need to know them profoundly so I can love them in the waythey deserve !

I don't require constant activity of my partners in terms of replies. Sometimes life is too much to be able to get in a writing headspace, and that's totally fine! I love talking about our muses even when we can't write, and I have no problem writing drabbles or fics whenever I can for my partners, just so we can have content !

——— THREE RANDOM FACTS ! ♡

I can sing in like ... 20 languages?

I am obsessed with stars and moons, and got stars tattoed on my hands for my birthday IT SUCKED

I once picked up a huge dirt disc that looked like it had constellation patterns in it and held it up for my classmates to see. My chem teacher said, "that's a cow pie," and I got so flustered i dropped it on my foot and it shattered

——— EXPERIENCE ! ♡

I got into RP because my best friend wanted a dedicated RP partner on tumblr, and I decided to do it with zero writing experience. I've been stuck here ever since.

I'm really blessed to have writing partners I've been mutuals with for years (momo is the longest at 8 at this point). I'm pretty loyal to writing partners, so if we connect once, we connect like through time and space and beyond the confines of mortal comprehension, so I'm never forgetting you, sorry

Plotting is a must on this blog, unfortunately. I struggle to just wing it, and do need some basis of understanding about your muse's personality and motivations in order to feel comfy about writing something successful for you.

Please also do not feel shy about plotting ! I like to think I'm good at leading the plotting if you're not comfortable with it. I'll always ask clarifying questions about your muse, and offer suggestions for a plot/verse,etc. I just need you to be open to communicating answers !

I've had extremely possessive RP partners in the past who have been emotionally abusive to me on personal levels, and I can be quick to nope out if I feel like people are getting weird, even just postig on dash

I have no issue approaching first for interaction, but if there's no reciprocation, I'll probably never approach again LKSJDHFLJSDF my anxiety will just assume you're not interested

——— MUSE PREFERENCE ! ♡

My muse type is typically "chaotic bisexual who loves their wife of any gender" and that's really the only fact anyone needs to know about me

I also generally love writing emotionally intelligent characters, and conversely the worst people you've ever met?? The psychological aspect of writing is arguably one of the reasons I love writing, so I'm ready to yap about any of these muses

Like 85% of my muse lists end up being male muses, but I really love writing female muses and especially wlw !

I write top-leaning switches and am rabid about writing with other switches. Share the love, you know? Battle for dominance with ur mouths and whatnot ... throw each other around ....

I do tend to take up characters for friends, so that's also the reason for the stupid range of idiots I take up

——— FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT ! ♡

FLUFF : I love fluff! But there has to be a balance, as with anything. Fluff is great because it's usually vulnerability between two people who trust each other enough to be soft ! But building up to that trust is important ( and challenging that trust ...)

ANGST : I adore angst but I need to build up to it— set the stage, watch it crash, pick up the pieces, then aftercare. For the muses. And me lskdjhflksjhdljsf I'M SENSITIVE

SMUT : I fucking love smut in the sense that it's an expression of muse chemistry and history, but I don't do it often only because it requires way too much brain power and life's got me fatigued. Unfortunately, I'm a bit of a sloot when I get comfortable enough to smut, so I probably go a little overboard, and you're not allowed to look at me or perceive me when I do lkjsdhflksjhdljshf

PLOT / MEMES : PLOTTING, PLEASE! I like to get comfortable with my knowledge of your muse, but more importantly, I want to lose my mind over them. As for memes, I tend to go overboard with memes, and everyone's free to continue them or not. I'll say I write my best memes with at least a little discussion beforehand. I generally don't send memes in unless I have a decent idea of who you'd want to interact with because I'm weirdly anxious about it

TAGGED BY : idr, it's been in my drafts for a hot minute ... TAGGING : (my mains and newest mutuals) @telndas ! @infernaelis! @tearenola ! @tragedicn ! @xianqu ! @morrias ! @bearratic ! @kaerinio ! @yishuns ! @sil3nth1lls !

[irrelevantwriter]

No Questions, No Lies

Pairing: Rio (Good Girls) x Female Reader/You

Rating: Explicit, NSFW

Warnings: Language, oral sex (male receiving), unprotected vaginal sex, mention of bodily fluids, angst, characters who refuse to say how they feel, asshole Rio (low key loves it)

Word Count: 4.7K

Summary: Part 4. Riding a high, you decide to invite Rio over. But things don’t go as planned.

A/N: Once again, I am here, standing in front of you lovely people and saying thank you for all the love and support this series has gotten. It means the world. And then some. Onto the good shit...this part has lots of feelings, not all of them good. Angst is heavy towards the end, but first...smut. We love some toxic ass yearning, don't we? Also, we get some Rio POV in the first half. I’ve got two more parts planned so as always, stay tuned. I hope you guys like it. Feedback is that good shit. 💗

*Read Part 1 here

*Read Part 2 here

*Read Part 3 here

*Read Part 5 here

*Give and Take series masterlist

*Masterlist in bio.

*********************

He shifted in his seat, eyes glancing in the rearview mirror. He caught a glimpse of you as you handed off the bag of cash to Mick. Your gaze tried to find his through the blackened windows, searching for his presence in the front seat of the Mercedes SUV. It was no use. The tint was as dark as he could get it without drawing attention. Not that it mattered. The cops were always sniffing around...waiting for him to slip up. They were going to be waiting a long time.

He rubbed his chin as you rounded the vehicle and opened the passenger door. A cool breeze carrying the scent of your perfume swept in as you settled into the seat. He took you in slowly, gaze sweeping over your body as it often did when in your company. The sweater and jeans you wore were nondescript enough, but the hint of cleavage was obvious. And because you wanted to draw his attention, he gave you what you wanted and admired the area he’d been up close with only weeks before.

“Hi.” You greeted somewhat shyly, the gesture making him smirk. Even after the sex, you still got nervous around him. It had lessened tremendously since he’d first fucked you on your kitchen counter, but it wasn’t gone completely. And he had to admit that he liked that. Liked that he had such an effect on you.

“Sup, mama…” He replied, licking his lips as you averted your eyes from his.

It’d been three weeks since he’d shown up at your house in the early morning hours, announcing his return. He’d be lying to himself if he said he didn’t miss being inside you. Now that he’d gotten a taste, it was difficult to manage without it. But you both had tedious schedules. He had several businesses. You had your kids. It didn’t always line up. And for three weeks it hadn’t. But seeing you now...he’d happily fuck you into the expensive leather of his seats if you’d let him.

“Everything good?” He prompted, noticing that you were fidgeting with your hands. You seemed worried, like something was weighing heavy on your mind. That wasn’t good.

“Yeah, yeah...of course.” You replied unconvincingly.

Rio leaned forward across the seat and placed a hand over both of yours, stilling the anxious movement of your fingers. Your eyes finally met his, a smile gracing your lips.

“What’s wrong?” He gruffly demanded, more out of concern for his operation than your personal feelings.

Your response surprised him.

“I need you to come over tonight.”

He took a long moment to silently take you and your words in. There was a softness in your features. It was unlike the expression of stress he’d seen you wear before. This wasn’t about business. This was personal.

“For what?” He asked, releasing your hand and sitting back to face you.

You bit your bottom lip and he watched as the appendage came away glossy and begging to be touched. His hand itched to reach out, but he stopped himself. Eager to see where you were taking this. Because he already had an idea.

“I...I need you.” You whispered, your gaze sliding to the deserted streets just beyond the windshield. You were hesitant. And that wasn’t going to work. He was going to have to teach you to take. In this world, there was no room for hesitation. You had to have the confidence to demand. If you didn’t, the weight of those around you who did would crush you.

Despite your timidness, his body hummed at your breathy confession. His blood pumped wildly in his veins while deep male satisfaction filled his chest. Inwardly, he was gloating. Outwardly, he was calm and nonchalant.

He shook his head and angled his ear towards you, as if signaling he couldn’t hear. “You gotta speak up.”

There was no humor in his tone. He wasn’t trying to tease you. He was acting as your instructor. Forcing you to be real about what you wanted.

He heard you scoff and as he turned to face you once again, he could see your hand reach out for the door handle. He stopped you with an outstretched arm, making sure to brush against your chest as he did.

“Just tell me what you want, darling.” He rasped, coercing your eyes to meet his.

You sighed, seemingly frustrated with yourself. He lifted his arm from across your body and instead let his fingertips trail down the side of your face. He watched from his peripheral as your chest expanded with a heavy breath, your breasts straining against the fabric of your sweater.

“You. I need you.” You repeated, the conviction clear in your voice this time.

He nodded, his thumb tracing the pout of your bottom lip. “That’s what I thought you said.”

Rio leaned in close, his mouth hovering dangerously over yours. You licked your lips in preparation for the action, the motion momentarily hypnotizing him. His eyes swept over your face, taking in every detail. His intense study made you shift in your seat. Maybe it was unease. He hoped it was arousal.

“I’ll be there.” He replied, pulling away and settling back into his own seat.

You blinked and nodded, still seemingly dazed by his proximity.

He hadn’t kissed you. And it was intentional. The constant push and pull of your relationship was maddening on most days. There was always an aspect of it that needed attention. Whether it was business or personal. It was always work. But times like these were what made it worth it. The teasing. The buildup. The attraction. It was so palpable he could practically taste it against his tongue. You were as frustrating as you were alluring and he was going to indulge in that combination until there was nothing left.

He wanted it all.

************

You smoothed out the fabric of your dress for the umpteenth time as you scrutinized your reflection. Nerves knotted in your stomach as you struggled to maintain some form of composure. Rio had texted you ten minutes before to say he was on his way. You didn’t know how much time that gave you, but it didn’t matter. It wouldn’t be enough.

You’d regretted your desperate demand of him the instant you’d left his car earlier that day. The cool air had pulled you from the fog of your lust and threw you back into reality. And it wasn’t good. You’d made a fool of yourself. You were better than that. You could form full sentences and express thoughts. You were confident and fully capable of telling a man to come over so that you could sleep with him. Especially one you’d already slept with.

You tried to find the courage that had consumed you the last time you’d slept with him. You’d taken without asking and he’d happily reciprocated. It was the very definition of raw desire and you had every intention of recreating it tonight.

Which is why you were taking extra care to make sure your dress was perfect, along with your hair and makeup. Not that it truly mattered. He’d already seen you practically fresh out of bed in cotton panties.

A knock at the front door made you jump in surprise, the knots in your stomach now turning to butterflies. You took one last look at yourself before you made your way towards the entryway, your bare feet soundless along the cool hardwood floors.

You opened the door, seeing Rio on the other side. He looked good. He always looked good. Dark shirt, dark jeans. And that unwavering look of smugness he so often wore. He was expressive without having to do or say much. He was self-assured. Arrogant even. The calm intensity he possessed was almost a magical power, holding you captive. It had a dual effect on your body. You were afraid. But it paled in comparison to your insistent arousal.

“Hi,” You greeted, gesturing for him to come in.

He did so wordlessly, eyes taking in your form as he moved. He let you lead him through the house and towards the kitchen and you swore you could feel his gaze blazing across your back, leaving a mark. He was good at that. He was good at making you feel seen. The rush of having someone pay attention to you in the way that Rio did was utterly seductive. It was addictive. And you wanted it for as long as he was willing to give it to you.

“You want something to drink?” You asked over your shoulder, heading towards the cabinet that housed the whiskey.

Rio’s voice stopped you.

“Nah, I’m good.”

You faltered and turned to see him leaning against the wall, watching you with an amused expression. Your insides heated with every silent second that passed between you. Looking at him made you remember why you’d asked him over. It wasn’t for a drink and it definitely wasn’t for small talk. Primal need began to swell within you as you stepped towards him. He was going to make you see your desperation through.

He straightened as you approached and invaded his space. You reached a hand out to trace the buttons of his shirt, gently tugging at the end of the fabric as you did.

“Come on,” You whispered, nodding your head in the direction of your bedroom. Any form of pretense was gone. You both knew why he was there...why he’d actually shown up.

You prayed he followed as you walked down the hall and into a space he had yet to be invited into. Until now. His footsteps echoed behind you, entering the bedroom and taking in his surroundings. You swallowed and turned to face him, pure want reflecting in his eyes. It urged you forward.

“Sit on the bed.” You commanded, voice surprisingly steady.

The corner of Rio’s lips edged upwards, but he did as you said. It appeared as if he was humoring you, expecting that you’d back out and end the night before it even began. But you were far past that. He’d made it clear, without words, that he wasn’t going to make this easy for you. He was going to make you work for everything. Whether that be his money or his affection. So you’d do it. You’d put in the work. And he’d reward you.

You reached for the zipper on the back of your dress, but it was too high. You stepped between his legs and faced away from him, motioning to the metal teeth that held the garment together.

“You mind?” You asked, waiting in anticipation. It was only a second later when you felt the brush of his finger against your back as he lowered the zipper. He made sure to drag his skin across yours, slowly and feather-light. It was almost non-existent, yet it pulled a shiver from you anyway.

You caught the loosened fabric before it fell, holding it to your chest. You turned and met his hooded gaze, noting the way his jaw was clenched. You let the dress fall to the floor, revealing the black lace you wore underneath. His eyes scanned your body like a predator stalking its prey, your nipples hardening in response. The sheer material of the bra barely concealed your body’s reaction. He took notice.

“That new?” He asked, chin jutting out and gesturing to the lace that adorned your body.

You stepped out of the dress and back between the space of his thighs, forcing him to look up at you. That familiar spicy scent filled your nostrils. It was his scent. And it lured you in further to his body’s warmth.

“If you want to think that highly of yourself.” You quipped with a coquettish smile, hands resting on his shoulders. His own hands remained on his thighs; not showing any indication that he was going to reach out and touch you.

His question had been spot on though. You had in fact went out and bought new lingerie. Several things in fact. And you might’ve bought them in black. A color that reminded you of only one person.

Rio chuckled lowly at your answer, licking his lips as you eased your breasts near his face. “You can’t let me have an inch, can you?” He challenged, an eyebrow raised in question as he looked up at you.

“If I give you an inch, you’ll take a mile.” You retorted, hands skimming along the back of his scalp. His fingers twitched against your legs at the motion, so you made sure to do it again.

Again he laughed. Humorless and patronizing.

“I can’t take what’s already mine.”

He said the words with so much confidence that you had to pause. You stilled your hands and for once stared right back into the depthless pools of his eyes. You predictably got lost in them, as you so often did with anything involving the man. His declarations of ownership should’ve scared you. They should’ve made you turn and run away. Instead, you went headlong into the storm.

“Pretty confident in yourself.” You replied, lowering yourself to your knees. He let his thighs fall open to make room for you, his expression showing just how pleased he was with your change in position.

“I’m not the one on my knees.” He threw back, hand finally reaching out to caress your cheek. His thumb swiped at your lips as his eyes zeroed in on them, no doubt picturing them wrapped around him.

“Touché.” You teased, kissing his thumb as it slid across your mouth.

You ran your hands up his thighs and towards his belt buckle. He let you, posture relaxing as he allowed you to do as you pleased. You shifted his pants and underwear out of the way as you pulled him free, your mouth already salivating at the sight. He was hardening with every second, veins and ridges calling to your womb like an old friend. You could feel him watching you as you leaned forward and placed a soft lick to the head of his cock. He tasted salty, but clean, and you wanted more.

You suckled at the tip of him while your hand worked the saliva around his length. He was long and pulsing with yearning in your palm. You let your mouth water around him, the sound of skin sliding against slickened skin now filling the room. The sound aided you in your efforts. You opened your throat to take him in, swallowing and savoring the low groan he expelled. It was music to your ears.

You listened to his reactions, catching every twitch of his cock along your tongue. You mercilessly teased him as you licked long strips along his flesh before you suctioned your cheeks and tightened around him. Your hands worked in tandem. Stroking what you couldn’t fit in your mouth while traveling down to caress his sac. He grunted and jerked with the action, causing him to slip further down your throat. Tears filled your eyes, but you kept going.

Moisture touched your tongue and you knew he was close. You chanced a glance up and was rewarded with a blissed out Rio. His head was angled back, his adam’s apple bobbing deliciously behind inked flesh as his hand made it to the back of your head. He didn’t push, but he didn’t have to. You happily gagged on his cock.

“That’s enough.” He commanded, voice low and tinged with barely contained control. He pushed your hands off of him and angled your chin up to him, his mouth descending on yours without a second thought.

You let him taste himself. Tongues intertwined in a show of eroticism that mimicked what your bodies longed to do. You steadied yourself on your knees as you grabbed at his shirt while his hands cradled your face. You wanted him to touch you...to explore your body in every way possible. It felt like your entire being was on fire and only he could soothe the ache. You needed him...badly.

“Touch me...please.” You pleaded once you’d broken apart.

He began to unbutton his shirt, discarding the piece of clothing easily as you waited. “Stand up.”

You did as he said, standing on shaky legs between his own. He reached out and smoothed his palms over your thighs and around to your ass, grasping the flesh and kneading. Your eyes closed in blessed relief, a moan just on the tip of your tongue. You jerked in his arms when you felt the wet heat of his mouth against your stomach, his lips trailing kisses along the flesh. Your hands held his head steady as he gave you what you craved. His fingers slid under the band of your panties, shifting the material up and down on your hips.

Impatience drove you to reach around and unclasp your bra, baring your breasts to his hungry kisses. He didn’t miss a beat. He mouthed at the underside of your breasts while his hands cupped them, massaging the sensitive mounds with skillful touches. Your panties felt too restrictive and uncomfortable. Wetness pooled in them as Rio’s touch urged more from you.

“The bed.” You gasped, feeling him pinch a nipple. The sensation made you shudder.

His presence disappeared from your body as he stood, pushing his jeans and underwear down. They fell to the floor as he stepped out of them, his shoes already off. You took him in for the first time. Took in the scarred flesh and lines of ink that ran along sinewy muscles. He was lean, but beautifully toned. All male.

You followed his lead and pushed the last scrap of clothing you wore down. The material fell easily to your feet and you kicked them away. You reveled in the way he looked at you. Untamed and feral. Like you were sin incarnate. It made your pussy clench in urgency.

Your palms glided up his firm chest as you reached forward to kiss him. He reciprocated, insistent hands guiding you to the bed. You let yourself fall to the mattress, his body following yours. Your mouths didn’t separate. You both savored the moment of finally being bare and pressed so closely to one another. You relished the flavors that sat on your tongues as you kissed, barely able to take in a breath. Hands roamed without barriers as he wedged himself between your thighs. You accommodated him, pushing your hips up to entice him inside you. A finger found its way there instead, dragging along your walls and collecting the moisture that had settled within.

“You ready?” He whispered into your ear, his finger now strumming at your swollen clit.

You nodded and moaned, hoping that was answer enough. Your back arched into his chest when he pressed the head of his cock at your entrance, lathering himself in you. Your nails dug into his back, your legs tightening around him. He showered you with tender kisses along your neck as his hips rutted against yours, not yet slipping into the place you both desperately needed him to be.  

“Look at me.”

You obeyed, locking gazes with him as he hovered over you. The moment lasted only a second before he was pushing forward. He was fully sheathed and throbbing within you as you clung to him, mouth open but no sound coming out. His face was buried into your neck as you both became reacquainted with the other. You felt deliciously full. Overwhelmingly so as his cock nudged the natural barrier within you. He was as far as he could go, and yet you wanted him closer.

“Move.” You said with a whimper, shifting your hips so that his cock dragged along your velvet walls.

Rio obliged, a prisoner to the cyclone of sensations that had swept you both up. He set a steady pace, his strokes deep and thorough. You cried out when he thrust so hard that you edged up the bed, the headboard rattling against the wall. Beams of light glowed behind your eyelids as he hit every spot as if he was made to. You clung to the silver chain that hung from his neck as he grunted in your ear, each pass of him stealing your breath.

“This what you wanted? Hmm?” He punctuated his question with a bruising drive of his hips forward, making your toes curl.

“Fuck, yes…” You moaned, disoriented by it all. The feel of him atop you. The rhythm of his hot breaths against your neck. The growls that rumbled from his throat. The sting of being stretched as he fucked you. It was enough to have you succumbing to your climax before you were even ready.

You slipped a hand between your bodies and rubbed at your clit, increasing the intensity of your impending release. You locked your legs around his waist and scratched at the sheets as ecstasy washed over you. Your pussy contracted with earth-shattering tremors as you flooded Rio’s cock with your spendings. A litany of moans and gasps accompanied your free fall into space. The man above you stilled as you rode out the waves of orgasm and clenched around him in almost painful spasms. And then, your entire body went limp.

The headboard resumed its melody against the wall as Rio chased his own end. He maneuvered onto his knees, his cock never leaving the confines of your body. He watched you from this new vantage point, taking in the expression of euphoria you wore. Your hands trailed up your abdomen and across your breasts, cupping them for him. His hips picked up speed, his body slapping against yours and creating an echo. You accepted it all as he finally came, filling you full with every drive of his hips. He held you firm as he emptied himself within you, ensuring not a drop was wasted. You hummed at the feel of it, warm and thick and possessing you.

His fingers loosened their hold on your thighs as he came down, the flesh already sore from his grip. He soothed the area, the motion making your eyes feel heavy with sleep instead of lust. You met his gaze and let out a breathless laugh, feeling your limbs already beginning to ache with overuse. He slowly retreated from your body and settled beside you, his back pressed against the headboard as the comforter shielded his lower half from view. You eased into a sitting position, bringing the sheet with you. The act of modesty was unnecessary, but you did so anyway.

“You good?” He asked, face turning serious.

You nodded, the mess between your legs proof of just how good you really were.

“We gotta talk.”

His words made you stiffen. The post-coitus high now tainted.

“About what?” You asked, attempting casualness as you faced him.

“You’re gonna have a new contact from now on. Someone besides me.” He explained. His tone was succinct and to the point. He wasn’t interested in making this a discussion. And that annoyed you. Because it deserved one, whether he thought so or not.

“What does that mean?”

“Means I’m moving on to something else. Something different. So now you gotta deal with someone else.”

You shook your head, desperately wishing you now had clothes on. “I don’t understand.”

“There’s nothing to understand. It’s how it has to be.” He stated cooly, features schooled into an expression of professionalism, despite his own state of undress.

“Why?” You asked, still struggling to comprehend what he meant. Because it sounded like he was pawning you off to someone else right after he’d fucked you.

“I’m flipping my game. Nothing can be permanent. You get caught if you get comfortable.”

“Don’t I get a say in this?”

“No. You don’t.” He retorted dryly. The quickness of his reply threw you, the coldness in it obvious.

“I don’t trust anyone else.” You said, standing up and wrapping yourself in the sheet. Your thoughts were running wild, the disbelief you felt clearly written all over your face.

“I trust him. He’ll handle shit.” Rio reassured you, though it didn’t translate. He sighed and stood from the bed, searching for his underwear and pants.

Anger flared inside of you as he got dressed. He was going to drop a bomb on you and then leave? The notion made blind fury replace the satiation of sex within you.

“I barely trust you.” You threw back, watching as he buttoned his shirt. He shook his head and laughed, apparently finding your statement funny. “Why are you doing this?” You asked, trying to keep the shakiness out of your voice but failing.

He moved towards you and cradled your cheek, a gesture you were starting to loathe. He didn’t have to say anything to be condescending. The intent was clear. That familiar pit formed in your stomach as he stared at you, licking his lips.

“It’s business. This isn't personal. Don’t make it that way, yeah?”

You twisted away from his touch, gritting your teeth in irritation. “So you coming over to fuck me when you want is business?” You challenged, wrapping the sheet tighter around your chest.

“I gave you a choice.” He replied, voice raising slightly. His face hardened, his eyes narrowing and spine straightening as you fought against him.

“And what choice was that? To fuck you or die?” You questioned hotly, seeing him take a step towards you.

“You don’t make the rules. This isn’t a fucking partnership, darling. You work for me. You listen to me.” He argued, matching your aggression.

An iota of fear crept up your spine, but you ignored it. You shook your head and turned to leave, but he caught you, holding your arm with a firm grip. It wasn’t painful, but it wasn’t comfortable either.

“Don’t. Do. That.” He warned, pulling you to face him once again. He was pissed. His temper barely under control as he pinned you with an icy glare.

“Fine....” You acquiesced, jerking your arm free. “Leave me in the able hands of someone else. I’ll make sure and show them the same kind of attention I showed you.” You goaded, seeing the vein in his neck pulse.

“Why do you gotta make shit difficult?” He asked, choosing to ignore your remarks. Rio didn’t wear jealousy well and it was obvious.

“You were the one that came to me, remember? You were the one that spouted that bullshit about trust.” You threw back, uncaring of the consequences.

“That's right.” He confirmed, stepping in your direction and crowding your space. You were both practically breathing the same tension-filled air. “And you went along with it. So go along with this. If not, arrangements can be made.”

You blinked, willing the man before you to disappear. You shouldn’t be surprised that things took such a left turn. They were bound to. And Rio was nothing if not an entrepreneur first. You knew that. Didn’t mean it stung any less.

“Leave.” You demanded, not meeting his gaze.

“I’ll be in touch.” He said before he was walking past you and out of the room.

The slamming of the front door echoed throughout the house when he left and you released the breath you’d been holding. Tears welled in your eyes, but you forced them back. The relationship between you and Rio was doomed from the beginning. You were both operating on borrowed time. No matter how much he acted as if he cared, he didn’t. You were a means to an end. That was blatantly apparent now. You were to fall in line and operate under his orders. That was it. But you couldn’t do that. Not when your entire life was at stake. You’d made the mistake of trusting him and he decided to throw it all away. All the progress made...for naught.

Rio would always want his money more than you. It made no difference if you finally offered yourself up on a silver platter, promising to run off with him. He’d surely laugh and pat your cheek, amused by your offer. He’d only been telling you what you wanted to hear. And wasn’t that what you wanted anyway? Wasn’t he just enough for a good time and an even better fuck?

Yeah. He was.

So then why did it hurt so goddamn much?

[leportraitducadavre]

On Itachi, his fandom, and moral standpoints

Once again I come back with a meta, unsurprisingly, of Naruto’s manga and, more specifically, about a character in particular, Uchiha Itachi, his fandom and what it entails and represents. My decision to make him the primary focus of this meta is just to bring light (open the door for more in depth debates) of a deeper, much more complicated problem that Itachi represents, but undoubtedly surpasses him and the Naruto manga as a whole.

Be warned, my take on Itachi’s fandom does not contemplate those fans who merely enjoy him but do not negate important parts of his character, if that’s your particular case, then be assured that I did not have you in my mind when writing this. This is about, let’s say, the hardcore fandom he possesses, that justifies (and to some extent, celebrates) his implications in the UCM and blindfold loyalty to Konoha and its system.

How can I even begin to introduce Itachi’s character? What he was supposed to be and what he surprisingly became? How to start to explain his fenomenon? Itachi was not supposed to be good, from his introduction he was a manipulative, dark character that tortured physically and mentally Sasuke and was a threat to Naruto’s (the protagonist) life. At no point during the first part of the manga were we able to see glimpses of a “good” Itachi that the narrative later on tried to establish, and yet, there were three (conected) factors of imperative importance to understand the raise of his character from the first part of the manga to the other. 

The first one was, let’s call it, his intrinsecal persona's appeal (and everything it encompases).

Itachi’s not the first cryptic male character that gets favored by a large part of the fandom for that mere trait (look at any shönen or show and see how many characters whose sole trait is to be mysterious becomes the fandom’s favorite), added to the fact that he’s powerful enough to subdue men who’s status of geniuses are often highlighted in the manga (Orochimaru and Kakashi), and his... physical charm, you have a powerful combo to make readers incline more and more on his favor. Itachi had sparked their interest. 

There are boxes to fill to attract the public interest to a character, and Itachi filled in all of them. 

The Power-Mystery-Beauty triangle is not an unknown formula (Christian Gray, Edward Cullen, to name characters from mainstream, from other manga there is Light, now surprisingly, Dabi) and in every fiction work it has appeared, it worked to lure the (female) public towards it.

But is that enough? For some, yes, for most, Itachi represents something that they desired profoundly, and that’s entirely attached to Sasuke’s character.

Even back in the first part of the manga, Sasuke’s character was received mixedly, there were people who saw his personality as too abrasive (similar to Itachi’s but because Sasuke was supposed to be with the nice guys, this aspect of him clashed rather harshly with his position on the narrative) and considered him a mere emo who believed himself to be better than Naruto and Sakura (he was, but he also acknowledged this fact, which make some readers disapprove of him even more). 

Itachi challenged that “so-called” superiority, additionally downgrading and humiliating him in a way readers felt he, to some extent, deserved. The dislike of part of the fandom of Sasuke’s character found a way of purchase inside the manga. Naruto wasn’t strong enough (and eventually cared too much) to subdue Sasuke, Sakura was too in awe with him to “stand up against him”, Kakashi saw his greatness and taught him powerful jutsus while paying zero attention to his other students. Until Itachi, no other character seemed to put Sasuke “in his place”, because even the villains of each arc seemed particularly obsessed with Sasuke and Sasuke only, elevating even more his importance and status and sidelining Naruto and (of course), Sakura, who were left with mere participations in what seemed a Sasuke-focused plot. Up at this point, Sasuke was far more important than the actual protagonist of the manga but Itachi, who was actually Sasuke’s goal, who was actually the person Sasuke aspired to surpass, abused him, manipulated him and -more importantly- seemed more focused on getting Naruto -hence, retribution: the only person Sasuke seemed to care about didn’t seem care about him at all.

Itachi’s coolness, strength and mature handsomeness (that Sasuke did not present until Shippuden, but Itachi was literally introduced with), plus the dislike of Sasuke’s character and the belief that he needed to be rectified, the reason of which will be brought up next, appealed the teenage fandom in a way strong enough to catapult him inside the popularity polls just right after his presentation. 

The Self-inserts inside Itachi’s fandom

As I introduced, a large part of the fandom back in the first part already, and in Shippuden particularly, had a deep dislike of Sasuke’s character and wanted him to suffer -to be beaten, to be “owned”, Itachi’s character fulfilled that wish, which takes me to the second factor. 

You can’t explain this point in particular without adding the “self-insert” and “reader-insert” notions that often gets attached to Itachi (Sakura, Naruto and Hinata) fans, 

“Self-insertion is a practice by authors of writing themselves into their own stories, either explicitly or in thinly-disguised form; in a fannish context this most often means fan writers writing themselves into their favorite source material so that they can interact with canon or its characters” (X)

Whilst

“Reader-Insert is a type of fanfiction, almost always written in 2nd person Point of View; the protagonist is always the reader, and is usually paired with one of the canon characters. "Reader-insert" typically has a hyphen hyphen, but is also known as Canon X Reader (sometimes CanonXReader).” (X)

In this particular case, many readers had succumbed to something slightly in between. The manga doesn’t belong to them, so the only one in position to literally self-insert is Kishimoto (canonically), so they are left with the option of attaching themselves personally to a pre-existed character with whom they feel somewhat represented. If not, then at least they attach emotionally to a character because it represents what they desire (this can be more observed in the shipping part of the fandom). Meaning, they use a canon established character that is not literally the reader, but who clearly represents them or represents what they want in their significant (romantical) other. 

Sakura was the only female lead who had a crush on the cool guy, readers (particular female ones) didn’t need much to feel a connection with her (during the first part, Kishimoto didn’t even give them much to do so, but they still attached to her with the prospect of what she might become), while Naruto was the dead last, it appealed to those who also felt that they weren’t popular or were mistreated by their peers.

But what the self-inserts of Sakura or even Naruto had to do with the increasing love for Itachi? 

To explain this in a way that can be understandable: Sakura fans who believed Sasuke disrespected her when not acknowledging her feelings or when downgrading her skills often turned their attention to the man of similar physique and strength to fulfill their fantasies of reciprocation -because canonically, Itachi had neither rejected, nor downgraded her character. In the same fashion, Naruto fans who believe Sasuke is egotistical by not caring for/acknowledging Naruto in the same manner he does (hence, not deserving him), tend to also indulge in the same type of behavior previously mentioned. 

Later on, when the narrative introduces the idea that Itachi stands alongside Konoha (Naruto and Sakura), thus, against Sasuke (from an idealistic standpoint), this particular practice deepens, grows. They feel validated on their idea that Itachi will treat  their favorite character (them) better, while at the same time punishing Sasuke for rejecting them.

There are not many cases of Itachi self-inserts, I’m not denying their existence however because he did fulfilled a wish many readers had (against Sasuke), but Itachi’s self-insert part of the fandom seems to be more in terms of female character fans that desire their favorite kunoichi to be loved/desired/respected? by a powerful, handsome, mysterious character. 

Sasuke’s importance in the narrative (and character growth)

Sasuke escaping Konoha to get to Orochimaru, train, and become strong enough to defeat Itachi and avenge his clan won’t hold up for the four hundred or so chapters Naruto Shippuden lasts. After Itachi’s defeat at his hands, Sasuke had no reason not to return to Konoha, more importantly, he had no reason to fight Naruto as it was the intention and ultimate and most important clash in the manga since the introduction of their rivalry. 

Sasuke’s growth as a character (that I spoke more detailed in this post) was tied to the introduction of a deeper, more important problem: Konoha’s involvement in the UCM. It wasn’t new in Naruto to present the dichotomy and harsh truths of the shinobi system (Hyuga clan, Haku, Jinchurikis), and the intervention of Konoha’s government in the massacre of the Uchiha clan provided the narrative with a reason to have both Sasuke and Naruto fighting in different sides of the battlefield, but also presented a deeper problem: Itachi couldn’t be bad.

He couldn’t stand in the “bad” side of the field because both, that would put Naruto (the hero) in the same morally bad position, and Itachi's fandom (which was massive), was eager for redemption, they demanded it, and Naruto is not a manga that doesn’t get influenced by what its purchasers want. In consequence, they needed to justify Itachi’s actions. We can talk about how abysmally bad they did it, we can talk about how much better this problem could have been sorted out, but that is not the core of this post. 

Kishimoto loved Sasuke, I have said this before, despite the fandom wishes, he stood his ground when it came to Sasuke and his revolutionary position until the very end. Maintaining that ideal as just, put Naruto (hence, Itachi) in the wrong. But because the narrative needed Naruto to be good and in the right, he ended up justifying genocide by justifying Itachi.

Consequently, and with the appeal he earned with his introduction and the Sasuke-hate (self-inserts), Itachi became a favorite character amongst favorite characters despite being a plot holes with legs. Readers eagerly consumed whatever panel proved that Itachi was not the bad guy he was previously believed to be. (proved or at least didn’t show, Itachi still commited genocide, but we don’t get to see such attrocities so its easier to forget he slaughtered innocent people, children amongst them). Readers who liked him were desperate for the narrative’s validation.

Core of the issue

Which brings me to the core of the post and in retrospection, I have already presented it: moral standpoints. This is not new, I’m not introducing any new idea, and this is hardly something that happens solely in the Naruto’s (and most specifically Itachi’s) fandom. Liking or not a character is tied to so many subjective variables that it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what makes a character desirable or despicable despite solid traits being commonly shared on particular troups. And yet, liking or not a character became a moral standpoint for which people judged each other on a personal level. It has happened since always, but the internet did nothing but make more accessible and public this type of clashes. Therefore, Redemption Arcs became the most precious gem inside fictional works and Naruto fell for it, and fell hard. 

It’s almost mandatory to have the narrative’s validation in order to enjoy a character freely and Naruto provided it to Itachi’s fandom. His actions were justified by the manga and the most important (and beloved) characters stood by his side, even those who were victims of him forgave his actions because there was someone (with less appeal and more morally questionable actions under his belt) to blame further. Having the narrative’s moral validation is more important than actually being in the right. 

Itachi was manipulated by the Will of Fire who he learned from Hiruzen who was passed to him by Tobirama who created it because he was raised during the Warring States Period, so his apprehension to the Uchiha was justified. It’s a train of justifications that ultimately holds no one responsible for the genocide of an entire clan/race which then becomes something bound to happen. So to save face, they use an escape goat: Danzo and the Curse of Hatred. They put the blame of the massacre to a single character and the actual victims because, well, they were genetically prone to disaster and killing them was the only way to ensure (temporary) peace.

Liking a character doesn’t automatically mean condoning its actions but because that subjective appeal became more and more the reflection of the reader’s ideals (for some reason I’m not here to trace), those two actions merged, which translated consequently into demanding the narrative’s validation of our tastes. There’s no denial of the pleasing sensation that comes with having the plot’s endorsement for liking a complex/morally gray or even dark character, but that approval turned to be the most important/valuable requirement, which, in turn, made readers justificate (supported by the narrative) despicable actions, such as genocide. 

Let’s go back to the second bullet point, self- inserts, as to discern more in depth their reasons to look for a justification on Itachi’s character: Itachi (an Uchiha that was not affected by the Curse, as his peers were) who the narrative proclaims wanted his brother’s safety and happiness above all things, stands morally with Konoha (hence, the readers’ favorite character). Therefore, justifying his actions is justifying Sakura and Naruto’s actions against Sasuke (manipulation is alright because Itachi did it, trying to kill Sasuke because he didn’t want to bend to their will is alright because Itachi did it), it gives them reasons to believe that they are on the right side of the battlefield, it gives them moral superiority. They’re in the right, they are good people, Sasuke was too deep in his hatred to either see it or correspond their feelings and that’s why he needs to be saved, and who more appropriate to do so than the two characters that were mocked by him during the first part of the manga? Even in the end, Itachi still gives them the retribution they still feel deserve and that Sasuke -still- didn’t give. 

[seattlesea]

Why Percabeth Isn’t a Good Ship (Sorry 2x)

I’m definitely getting cancelled- 

1. Annabeth is physically abusive. The fandom makes this point seem controversial and debatable, but it’s really not. The definition of abuse is hitting someone. Annabeth hit Percy. Therefore, Annabeth abused Percy. Is that really that hard to understand? Annabeth hit Percy for the first time in The Titan’s Curse when she, Percy, and Thalia were looking for the di Angelo siblings. She punched him in the gut when he asked her who he should ask to dance with him. Annabeth knows that Percy can be oblivious at times...but punishes him when it benefits her? The second time was in The Mark of Athena, when she judo-flipped him because she missed him. That’s...what?? Usually when people are worried about someone else, they hug or kiss them, not flip them over their shoulder. And yes Annabeth kissed him first, but the judo-flip was completely unnecessary. Annabeth punished Percy for ‘leaving’ her despite him being kidnapped and his memory wiped. And everyone’s like ‘But Percy didn’t feel any pain!!11!!1!’ The chapter wasn’t in his point of view, so that claim is a guess. Just cause he didn’t say ‘Ow’ doesn’t mean he wasn’t in pain. Also- Annabeth slammed him on a stone pavement on his back. That definitely hurts, even if Percy is a demigod, physically strong, and has gotten hurt a lot. There’s a difference between ‘playful hitting’ and actually hurting someone. Yes they trained a lot, but this isn’t training. This is Annabeth punishing Percy for being traumatized with yet another life-threatening quest and being kidnapped. I don’t remember Percy judo-flipping Annabeth after he saw her again when she got kidnapped in TTC. Besides, the Romans were about to take out their weapons when they saw Annabeth attack Percy, so if all of them thought it was an attack...it was most likely an attack. Even Annabeth said herself “I only attack my boyfriend like that”. The thing is, if it was Percy who flipped Annabeth over his shoulder and slammed her on her back or punched her in the gut, all the fans immediately would’ve freaked out and cancelled him, calling him a horrible and abusive boyfriend, but because it’s the girl hitting the guy, it’s fine apparently. Nothing wrong with it, right? And then Riordan (and the fandom) had the audacity to romanticize that abuse. Abuse isn’t a sweet, romantic gesture. Stop making it seem like it is. That’s disgusting. 

2. Annabeth is also verbally abusive and toxic. Annabeth canonically lowered Percy’s self-esteem, constantly insulted him and his intelligence despite knowing he was insecure about it and always getting kicked out of schools and getting bad grades (even with her so-called ‘endearing’ name for him ‘Seaweed Brain’), and the overall idea of Percabeth is a super smart, pretty girl making a guy with below average intelligence feel insecure about himself. Percy’s self-esteem has plummeted since he met Annabeth and her behavior is never called out or even noticed, which implies some manipulation going on. Annabeth is shown to be extremely capable of manipulating her enemies and anyone else she pleases, and there are quite a few signs she’s using it against Percy (his feelings of obligation, fear, and guilt of and over her, questioning himself, having strings attached, always only thinking of her and no one else in his life, etc.), especially since Percy begins to gradually stop noticing Annabeth’s wrong and toxic behavior as the story progresses. 

3. Annabeth only likes Percy cause he’s the chosen one. Annabeth only hung around Percy since The Lightning Thief cause she thought he was ‘the one’ and so she could finally go on a quest. She literally used Percy to go out to the mortal world and ‘prove herself’ cause really, all she cares about is glory, which is shown multiple times throughout the series with all her pride and ambitions. Plus the fact that Chiron made Annabeth swear on the River Styx that she would keep Percy from danger is a pretty clear sign she didn’t stick around him just cause she wanted to, but because she felt obligated to and cause it would benefit her. Take all of this and it’s kind of obvious Annabeth only hung around Percy cause he was the chosen one of the prophecy, a son of one of the Big Three, and was destined to go on multiple quests and play a big part in the mythological world, which is what she always wanted since book one.

4. It was forced. Since the beginning of book one, it was so obvious that Percy and Annabeth were going to get together that their relationship ended up being boring, dull, and flat. Riordan made it so obvious they were going to be a couple that nothing that happened to their relationship really mattered, cause everyone knew it would work out in the end (which is probably why everyone *wrongly* hated on Rachel) so what happened in between didn’t matter. Their relationship was the typical ‘male lead and female lead’, ‘bad boy trouble-maker skater and nerdy good girl’ power couple that was way too clear. And Riordan made it worse by pushing their relationship and shoving it into the readers’ faces way too much. In MoA Annabeth states that she’s always had a crush on Percy (since they were twelve) which immediately rips all the development their relationship (which was supposedly ‘friends to lovers’, but not anymore) had away. Riordan made up a bunch of honestly dumb scenarios that were legit cringe to make Percabeth seem like ‘OTP’ that really didn’t make sense.

5. It ruined their characters. Percy and Annabeth would’ve been way better off as just friends. After they got together in HoO, all their personality and everything else that made them independent was destroyed to make room for more ‘Percabeth’. All of Annabeth’s skills, bravery, intelligence, pride, ferocity, judgmentalism, and all the other traits and flaws that made her a well-written character were never utilized or even mentioned. All she thought about was Percy, and the same goes for him. His loyalty, sarcasm, humor, obliviousness, etc. disappeared to make room for arrogant Annabeth fanboy. In PJO, they were amazingly well-written and great role models for younger readers (especially Annabeth), but in HoO their characters were exclusively ‘Annabeth’s boyfriend’ and ‘Percy’s girlfriend’. Their characters were completely dependent on each other, and they were way better off as just friends. 

6. Annabeth is way too possessive. And creepy. It’s fine and honestly normal for people to get jealous when another person likes someone they do, but Annabeth’s jealousy was downright creepy. Not only did she not know if her feelings for Percy were reciprocated or not, but she also didn’t know if Percy and Rachel liked each other, either. The very first time she met Rachel she immediately hated her. That’s not ‘I’m jealous cause this girl likes the guy I do’, that’s ‘I’m jealous cause the guy I like has another female friend’. She had no reason to believe that Rachel and Percy liked each other and has no say in who they can like, either. She thought that she and Percy absolutely had to be in a relationship and that he couldn’t even have friends with different genitals than him. And remember when Annabeth literally stalked Percy in The Sea of Monsters? Like when she creeped by his window, constantly watched him, and kept tabs on him just cause she ‘couldn’t find the right time’ to tell him something cause he was ‘never alone’ despite him being alone multiple times and despite the fact that she literally could’ve just knocked on his door like a normal person instead of creeping around his cabin and staring at him through the windows? Again- switch the roles. If it was Percy who was stalking Annabeth, everyone would’ve immediately called him a creep. If- according to Tumblr and almost everyone who read Twilight- Edward is a creep for stalking Bella, then Annabeth is a creep for stalking Percy. 

7. It’s mostly fan love. Honestly, the fandom is the only thing that fuels Percabeth. Riordan just destroys it. He shoved it down the readers’ throats, forced it way too much with really dumb and honestly unrealistic scenarios, and made it abusive and toxic. On its own, Percabeth freaking sucks. The fandom’s version of Percabeth is 1000x better than whatever the hell Riordan was doing, but even that version is toxic. Like, I’ve seen way too many jokes about Annabeth hitting Percy (as if abuse is hilarious and amazing meme fuel and not an extremely sensitive topic that triggers multiple people who actually went through it). Half the time, the fandom fixes Percabeth and the other half of the time they over-glorify and ruin it. The fandom over exaggerates and over glorifies it way too much. It’s not that great of a relationship, to be honest. Most of y’all only like it in the first place cause Riordan made it canon.

8. It was cringey. Like I said above, Riordan wrote some really dumb scenes for Percabeth. I mean- the matching gray streaks in their hair despite Atlas and Artemis not getting any? Percy’s tie to the mortal world while bathing in the River Styx being Annabeth and not his mom, Grover, etc.? Percy only remembering Annabeth, the girl he’s only known for four years and not his mom, the only woman who actually cared for and took care of him or Grover, his best friend who protected and continuously cared about him? Percy turning down immortality only for Annabeth and not even bothering to mention the pain of leaving behind his life, friends, family, memories, etc. behind if he accepted it? The romanticized judo-flip? The whole ‘dark-haired rebellious bad boy/nerdy blonde good girl who can be bad’ trope? Even the boring predictability of Percabeth is cringe. 

9. It’s a bad influence on younger readers. Basically the lesson of Percabeth is ‘Once you get a love interest nothing else in your life matters’. Besides that one single scene that took like three lines in The Son of Neptune, Percy never even thought of his own mom, nor did he think about any of his friends or passed allies like his dad, Rachel, Grover, Paul, Silena, Luke, Ethan, Bob/Iapetus, Tyson, Calypso, Charles, Michael (whose death he accidentally caused), Bianca, Zoë, etc. Even when in Tartarus with the curse of the Arai being forced to remember all the people he forgot and feeling guilty about abandoning Bob and Calypso, all he thought about was Annabeth. Even when faced with the man who broke the heart of the girl who sacrificed herself for him, Percy didn’t even think of her, only his jealousy of Jason. Same thing with Annabeth. She never thought about her mom, Luke, Thalia, her step-mom or step-brothers, etc. It was all about Percy. Cause yes, Riordan, that’s exactly the lesson you should teach your younger readers- forget everyone you ever knew the moment you get a partner. Besides that, it also teaches readers that being rude to people who like the same person as you is completely okay cause no one will care and once you start being rude, bitter, and possessive you’ll get exactly what you want (that’s literally what happened, with Annabeth and with Calypso, too). He also teaches that after you get a partner, everything that makes you you will disappear and you’ll be completely dependent on them and nothing in your life will matter, even your own independent life and personality. 

10. The fandom tries to excuse and explain Annabeth’s behavior??? What??? Since when does explaining and excusing hitting people put you in the right again? And the excuses aren’t even good, too! Percabeth fans use-  Annabeth was full of emotions/mad and doesn’t know how to deal with emotions. Annabeth really loved Percy. It was only one time. Annabeth was worried about Percy and mad that she left him. Annabeth didn’t mean to hurt him. Annabeth didn’t know what she was doing cause she was full of emotions. ??? Annabeth was full of emotions/mad and doesn’t know how to deal with emotions- Annabeth was seventeen years old, the daughter of the wisdom goddess, and is supposedly the smartest character in the series who is shown to be extremely good at reading people and their emotions. And y’all are really trying to say she doesn’t know how to deal with her emotions?  Annabeth really loved Percy- SO? A mother might really love her child, does that excuse her for hitting them for dumb reasons? It was only one time- actually, it was twice, and so what? If someone was slapped across the face ‘only one time’, does that mean they weren’t abused? ‘Abuse’ doesn’t mean ‘hit constantly’, it means ‘hit’. If someone was hit, they were abused. Is that really not a known fact in this fandom? Annabeth was worried about Percy and mad that she left him- last time I checked, people didn’t hit others when they were worried about them. If I was worried that my friend was going to get hurt, I wouldn’t hurt them myself. That literally makes no sense. And again- Percy didn’t leave Annabeth. He was kidnapped. Do y’all not know the definition of that, either? Annabeth didn’t mean to hurt him- yes, cause that’s why she decided to flip him over her shoulder, slam him on a stone pavement on his back, and punish him for ‘leaving her’.  Annabeth didn’t know what she was doing cause she was full of emotions- Annabeth??? the daughter of the wisdom goddess??? not knowing what she’s doing??? huh??? I mean, would any of you really, legitimately try to use any of these dumb excuses to excuse a man from hitting his wife? Hopefully not. And if you did, you would immediately get hated on and legit cancelled. So what makes this any different? Also- I see the excuse ‘Annabeth didn’t know Percy lost his Achilles Heel and thought he was still invincible’. Under different circumstances I’d accept that, but Annabeth knew that Percy’s Achilles Heel was on the small of his back...BUT SHE SLAMMED HIM ON HIS BACK. If Percy hadn’t lost the Achilles Heel, Annabeth literally would’ve killed him. Abusive enough for y’all? Or is attempted murder excusable and still ‘OTP’? 

11. They had no chemistry whatsoever. Was I the only one who felt...absolutely no chemistry between Percy and Annabeth? Like some of their moments were cute, their friendship was really good, and they had a lot of potential, but they didn’t feel right for each other. Remember- opposites don’t attract (they just argue, and no one has ‘another half’ that needs to ‘complete them’, everyone is their own person), they cancel each other out. I mean, Reyna and Annabeth had more chemistry in that one chapter of the New Rome tour in MoA than Percy and Annabeth had in 12+ books. They’re just...not right for each other, I guess. 

I’m definitely getting cancelled-

Edit 2: Sorry if I offended anyone with that last note. Just wanted to let y’all know that I am not here to start any drama, hurt anyone, or disrespect any Percabeth shippers. I respect your opinions 100% and only ask you do the same for me. Like I literally only wrote this at 12 am when I was bored and had nothing else to do and couldn’t sleep (same goes for pretty much everything else I write about PJ). Besides, why argue and start drama over dumb stuff like that when we can just find something we agree on? Don’t like Piper McLean? Let’s talk about that. Think Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano is a queen? Let’s talk about that. Think Nico di Angelo is freaking amazing? Let’s talk about that. Think Theyna would be adorable? Let’s talk about that. Want someone to vent to about writer’s block? Why the hell not? Want random writing advice and tips for writer’s block? Sure, I got plenty. Instead of arguing and starting beef over trivial fictional ships. 

[prince-of-elsinore]

Maybe I'm about to stir the pot but whatever here goes: idk why some (obviously not all) Sam stans get so defensive about the insinuation that Dean might be female-coded in some ways (well, actually I do but I don't wanna get into that 😂), but it got me thinking about what it is that some fans see in Dean, and for some female or gnc fans, what it is in Dean that we relate to. (Just for the record, none of this has any bearing on how female-coded Sam is--it's so not a competition lol. I think Sam can be considered very female-coded. Also, for the record--although this really ought to be self-evident--I don't equate female-coding with feminization, woobification, or even softness necessarily, nor innate relatability/sympathy.) Anyway, it led to some Dean meta thoughts:

First, I think a big part of it has to do with emotional labor, particularly within the John-Dean-Sam dynamic. We know that from a young age, Dean was aware of what his father did and was performing emotional labor in caring for his father when he was tired after a hunt (like the "It's okay, Dad" anecdote), or drinking too hard--and being practically the only such emotional support John had/would allow himself. Also, having your sibling's life placed in your hands, being repeatedly told it is your responsibility, is certainly emotional labor. And being in a household with two strong clashing personalities, being forced into the peacekeeper role (as we see echoes of in s1), is emotional labor.

Another obvious aspect (though for some reason an especially contentious one in fandom it seems?) relates to Dean's domesticity and role as a nurturer. I really don't care to argue here about how domestic and nurturing Dean is or isn't, because I think for purposes of this post, it's actually sort of irrelevant. The point isn't that Dean was the best homemaker ever; what's much more interesting to consider is how, in the absence of a female presence, typically "feminine" tasks fell to Dean, whether he was willing or not. Dean says it plain as can be in 12.22 Who We Are: "I had to be... more than just a brother. I had to be a father and I had to be a mother, to keep him safe. And that wasn't fair. And I couldn't do it." Of course he couldn't, because he was just a kid only four years older than Sam. But that doesn't mean that the burden of expectation, that that role was his to fill, wasn't there.

Related to the last point is how Dean suppressed personal desires for the sake of family, which is so often expected of women. It's an extension of the caretaker role; anything he may have wanted must come second to his duty to family. The shapeshifter in 1.06 Skin has access to Dean's thoughts and says: "You got to go to college. He had to stay home. I mean, I had to stay home. With Dad. You don’t think I had dreams of my own? But Dad needed me." In fact, you could easily argue that the only desire Dean ever really allows himself to have or express is family. Opinions on Lebanon may vary, but I don't think it's at all out of character that Dean's greatest wish was for his family to be all together.

I also think that Dean's brand of vulnerability is something that some female fans would find relatable. I don't want to sound gender-essentialist about it and I don't think I would call this female-coding, because it's not necessarily a universal female experience (not that anything that could be considered female-coding needs to be universal--that would be impossible), but I can say that it's probably the primary characteristic that drew me to Dean. Dean's insecurity is rooted in his fear of his emotional needs being too great. He is insecure about how much he needs his family, and worries that that need is not reciprocated (whether it is or not isn't the point--this is about Dean's perception). In season 1, it's his feeling that John and Sam care more about killing the demon than they care about him. For many more seasons, it's his fear that Sam will leave him. He's terrified of being needy, of his emotions and his love being too much. I would venture a guess that within family structures, this is a trait most commonly associated with mothers/wives.

I'm sure there are some more points that could be made (something about performative gender that I'm too brain-tired to write out atm?) but these are what occur to me off the top of my head. I don't think it should be surprising to anybody that both male leads of a show with a large female fanbase have aspects of their characters that could easily be considered female-coded, nor that different fans identify more with one or the other (which may or may not have to do with their individual brands of female-coding. In many cases, I think it does.) Personally, I also think that both Sam and Dean fans sometimes exaggerate these traits to the point of being OOC--and I think that's their prerogative, enjoying fandom as they wish to, though it can be frustrating when it seems like that fan version of the character is conflated with the canon character. But it is silly to think that only one brother can be female-coded or relatable--and for that matter, it's silly to equate female-coding with sympathy points. For some people, female-coding may make a male character more relatable, but female-coding and relatability or sympathy are not directly correlated. In fact, some discussions around female-coding are a little off-putting to me for the implication that any sort of relatable trait in a male character must be be female-coded, or that possessing/showing emotions at all is innately feminine. To me, it's just interesting to observe narrative and characterization trends in a cultural context. But that's a more complex discussion for another time!

[hieranarchy]

The Women of Sherlock

4 years late to this masterpiece. Sherlock is just the most well-written TV show i have ever come across. Everything is perfectly finessed and crafted with so much care and flair, from script to dialogue to cinematography to plot pacing (I need to rest after one episode), I find no words for higher praise. Perhaps the pompous english delivery and tendency for grandoise flourishes might not be for everyone, but it is definitely my kind of show. 

I remember the part where Mycroft told John, "you are not traumatized by the war. You miss it." was precisely the point I got hooked. I felt that.

So in a bid to enshrine my love for the show (4 seasons of which i binged over two weeks), I shall make a post of the excellent portrayal of female characters (in the same unrelentingly verbose, highfalutin style), that no one asked for and with no new information provided.

MARY ELIZABETH WATSON

The poised and sensible wife and woman behind every good man (wait sorry, why still behind?) that can probably mother anything in her path. Except when she is in assassin-killer mode, she is able to detach her emotions to the point where she can coldly calculate exactly where to shoot you so you might just not die.John just couldn't pick ordinary, blessedly mundane partners, can he?Deadly sharp and sweet, with a deep, prescient wisdom and perception that can probably only be acquired from having killed many and needing to cover your arse about it, Mary is the typical femme fatale character. Unfortunately, she lived up to that name, when, out of fatally unconditional love and loyalty, she fatally took a bullet for the one time our dear Sherly failed, and died.

MRS HUDSON

your sweet, shrivelled grandma-next-door with a whole lot of sass, probably a saucier history of debauchery than you, plus guts of steel belied by her diminutive frame, because which other landlord will stand frequently finding various kinds of human remains stashed in the fridge for lab analysis and the occasional cracks of gunshots in her daintily-wallpapered walls when Sherlock expresses frustration at not being able to crack a case?yes, she isn't a simple woman.  the widow of a depraved and philandering cartel druglord whose death by decapitation was in part precipitated by none other than herself, and therefore inheriting his house and BMW, Mrs Hudson was able to quick-wittedly conceal Sherlock's critical possessions at gunpoint, while engendering sympathy from her captors as a hapless, frightened old lady.

"Mrs Hudson leave Baker Street? England will fall."-Sherlock

EURUS HOLMES

They say women are crazy, and you should be afraid of Eurus Holmes. Sherlock's impressive, Mycroft's prodigious, and Eurus is diabolic. Long-lost, locked up sister of the Holmes trinity, her cleverness proved too dangerous to contain even as a toddler.Her crime? Leading Sherlock's playmate to his death so Sherlock will play with her. Whoops.Might be the best rendition of a villain I've ever seen. One colder, crueller and cocksurer than any male fiend has ever displayed. Beating them at their own game, feeding their ego, making negotiations to get exactly what she wants.However it is revealed her distended intellectual abilities result in feelings of extreme isolation, as if she is 'trapped in a flying plane in which everyone's asleep.' At the end of the day, for all her acerbic appraisals on people and the world, Eurus remains mentally as a little girl pining for her brother to play with her. A light illuminating too brightly that extinguishes just as quickly. Nevertheless, an intriguing freak of nature indeed.

Amazing the number of times a man doesn’t really look at your face. Oh, you can hide behind a sexy smile, or a walking cane ... or just be a therapist, talking about yourself all the time.

IRENE ADLER

What does it mean when a female, self-professed homosexual professional dominatrix and a male, most-likely asexual high-functioning sociopathic detective seem to have an undeniable electrifying attraction to each other? Both recognise the inner freak of a genius in each other that is now, two-of-a-kind.We are shown a woman who relishes and maintains power in every respect, from the bedroom to her personal wealth and even securing underworld invincibility, who, in her own words: 'makes her way in the world'.

 She has no qualms using the power of female sexuality to surprise, subdue and siphon what she seeks, but towards the end we see her falter and thwarted by yet another typically female inclination of emotions and sentiment. (She sardonically or rather affectionately, if her multiple texts to Sherlock in an avant garde display of female-initiated wooing is any indicator) sets the passcode to her phone as I AM SHER-LOCKED)  

Yet she is literally saved by this lapse in affection, from Iranian terrorists, when it moved our utterly self-possessed and honestly also self-obsessed secret softie Sherlock, who reciprocated coolly with rare cliche of a hero-saves-the-damsel-in-distress moment, thus showing us love can be both a formidable weakness and strength.

MOLLY HOOPER

Finally, a character we can relate to. Depicted as an unassuming, babbling and bumbling side character, but  also possesses the ultimate superpower of being able to slap Sherlock in the face without facing resistance or retaliation. Because if she does so, then he deserves it.

JOHN WATSON

Sorry not a woman, I emasculated him. Just balancing out the status quo. He is almost like Sherlock's unappreciated wife in the shadows / and full-time child handler (and I mean this in terms of relationship dynamic, nothing sexual, go away shippers and fic writers) A complete danger-addict and badass packaged in fun-sized, cute, wrinkly dad material. Aw.

https://moonlitthoughts.medium.com/the-women-of-sherlock-3c3437c6f93e

[comrade-meow]

The conflation of paraphilias with healthy sexuality, is a dangerous one and it is a conflation that is happening under the “gender identity” umbrella. It is posing as a human rights movement but, it is dehumanizing. This is not an accident. “Gender identity,” driven by elites invested in normalizing transsexualism and transhumanism are part of a techno-medical complex, using the internet to drive their ideology.

The main engines normalizing paraphilias are the internet, bio phobia and by extension, woman hatred. The internet, the beating heart of the techno dystopia we are entering is changing our cultures, our thoughts, our world and what it means to be human, faster than we could have imagined. This apparatus is wedded to the industries that have formed around the sexual objectification of women for profit: Porn, prostitution, surrogacy, and now “gender identity.” They are driving these industries faster than we can resist them.

The internet is not a tool developed so we can all hang out in one big global coffee shop having conversations. It was an instrument used by the military for spying and is now a vehicle for driving the propaganda of the state, into our homes, businesses and into our consciousness. It is being used to control us.

The more we move away from who and what we are, organically, as parts of a living system, the more we become entrenched in technology, the more of our lives we trade off. This process is one of embracing necrophilia, the first and last paraphilia, one that eroticizes death over life, of which all the other paraphilias are offshoots. More and more often, we choose sexual objectification over desire for connection, dead machines over living entities, robots and artificial intelligence over living consciousness and sex robots over women who are alive.  We celebrate our own dissociation as progressive.  We have become compulsively addicted to that which does not reciprocate.

Sexuality is a word used for sexual attraction and sexual orientation, toward another person, either of the same sex, the opposite sex, or both sexes. It is based in connection, attraction, desire, mutuality and embodiment.

Paraphilias are something different, usually referred to as perversions or psychosexual disorders, in which sexual gratification is obtained through practices or fantasies involving a bizarre, deviant, or highly unusual source of sexual arousal such as an animal or an object,

which may prevent or hinder one's ability to receive reciprocal love.

What makes paraphilias bizarre or deviant is not some prudish resistance by the majority of society, but their obsessive, dissociating, compulsive and objectifying qualities as they pertain to one’s erotic arousal. These elements of paraphilias are what prevent intimacy and connection with others.  Sexual compulsions, like addictions, center those with paraphilias in desperation, a desperation they inflict on others, because others can never satisfy the longing for connection those with paraphilias and addictions need but simultaneously repel.

The further we get from sexual attraction based in connection to others, based in embodiment, the more we insist that paraphilias should be socially normalized, as in the current “gender-identity,” or anti-reality movement, which is a sexually dissociative and objectifying expression.

Sex and sexual attraction are being deconstructed for profiteering, eugenics and social engineering, a means toward forcing our evolution away from life, and melding us with machines. These experiences are being driven by technologies developing much faster than they can be harnessed, which are controlled by elites who, satiated by the things that money can buy, and driven by addiction, thrive on an ability to control others to satisfy their desperation.

Life is connection. Sex is connection. Paraphilias are addiction, obsessiveness, rumination, control, objectification and they destroy connection. They are anti-life.

As the profiteering off women, and technological developments advance, escalated by a totalitarian market that feeds off human suffering, animal torture and the ravaging of our planet, we swerve out of control like addicts, headed into the long, dark night.  We are possessed and cannot see the forest through the trees, or where all this dissociation is leading.

“Gender Identity,” deconstructing sex, by violating the boundary between male and female with surgeries and chemicals and treating this endeavor as treatment for people with dysphoria related to sex, or as expression, is to invest in the complete undermining of reality. It invests in the death spiral we are in as a species. It is the pinnacle expression of necrophilia - the eroticization of death. It is the religion of those who are driving us into the techno dystopia we are on the brink of.

We must look deeper at what is transpiring. We must fight for and choose life. We must regard paraphilias as the addictions born of disconnection that they are if we wish to pull out of this death spiral.

[monkey-network]

Why EVE is The Best

Heads up. I’m basically gonna sperg about this whole film, so spoilers for this twelve year old film. Enjoy!

Wall-E is one of my favorite films; I would gladly kill and extort to bring the sequel I had in mind to life in any way; animatics would pleased me if nothing else but anyways. I love this film and one of the biggest reasons for that is the character EVE, a character that stuck in my mind longer than most if you can believe. So, better time than any, Imma just ramble about why I love this character. And, before we begin, I’m gonna say EVE is a girl, Wall-E is a boy due to my brain believing they were respectively female- and male-coded for most of my life but do NOT let this stop you from envisioning them however you please. If they’re both girls or boys to you, all power to you. With that said, here we go...

The Design

Now I’m not saying she has the greatest robot design ever; I don’t look at eggs and remember better days when I got to watch that film for the first time in my old house. But Pixar certainly knew how to make simplicity work to perfection. Simple shape, simple mechanics, simple movements. All feeling right at home with her coming from the more advanced future, especially compared to Wall-E where he’s literally a more grounded looking robot. Thematically, this design is fucking genius. A scouter robot with the ability to fly with ease and yet carries a literal arm cannon with incredible fire power. Both expressing how she can have her head in the clouds, observational when necessary, and yet trigger happy amidst the slightest inconvenience or surprise. *MWAH* What the fuck? It’s a great duality where the hard, more logical exterior possesses a sweet and approachable core just waiting to be shown and it’s wonderful seeing Wall-E, this literal block head, fumble his way into having a simple conversation with her. Now I can’t really disassemble how the programming in Wall-E works where they can behave like humans but follow objectives like a machine... but, I can try. With this scene.

Now take this with a grain of salt, the inferencing is more to the imagination otherwise the fun of this movie is tarnished. But from this scene, it’s clear that in this universe robots can show feelings for one another but can’t be romantic with humans because they can recognize human emotions and reactions but do so in an automated sense. The film expresses their curiousity just enough to where their reactions to human things and functions are within reason and yet doesn’t toy with the viewer’s believability. EVE is capable of responding to Wall-E’s advances but doesn’t 100% reciprocate his feelings because Wall-E isn’t her directive (least not yet, that’s for later). Not to mention, she isn’t that adept at romance unlike Wall-E who, by being alone with Earth’s technology, was able to learn and process human romance through the Hello Dolly VHS and potentially other things over the years. So this conversation works with the two having their limited knowledge, we don’t know how much they know, and the film keeps focus on having a balance between somewhat logical reactions and minor impulsive humane reactions that makes them alive but only just enough so it doesn’t feel like them being robots is pointless... Phew. Speaking of which, you know what isn’t pointless? Her motherfucking buster cannon.

Her whole ass arm houses a gun capable of nuking an entire cargo ship in a matter of seconds and it makes sense that she’d have it cuz how can a scouter robot defend themselves but beyond that, it’s just so goddamn cool. Like yeah, I can express how this symbolizes about America and... how they want to fuck their guns or something but who cares. She has a FUCKING ARM CANNON and it’s badass, end of discussion.

The Hanger Moment

Much as I love the moment where the two are in space flying, I honestly say that this moment where the two are in Wall-E’s house during the darude sandstorm is incredibly important. EVE is reasonably taken to his home and naturally, when the lights come on, she looks through the stuff he gives to her. She gets to take it easy for once, things can be quiet after she blew up a whole ship, have a giggle or two at the trinkets he’s collected, with the cigarette lighter being a good tool that’ll be used for later.

She’s curious, bouncy, still a bit quick on the draw, but is nonetheless taking in a lot this robot on Earth has to offer. It’s this and the small 1v1 they had before that is a lovely seedling to not only their connection but EVE’s development on her own, where we hardly need dialogue to show how she’s feeling about it all. And yeah, I’m with plenty of people to say that if this movie was just about the two of them being on Earth it probably would’ve been the greatest Pixar film of all time for many. Fortunately the plot kicks in when Wall-E shows EVE the plant, forcing her to go dormant, thus pulling Wall-E into an adventure on the Axiom ship. And I say fortunately cuz this is where EVE goes from good to great as a character.

The Axiom

While it’s something where we all wish that this film wasn’t the densly plotted, society driven second half, I say the second half on the Axiom carries the film’s themes and character building for EVE to good heights. We enter EVE’s territory, the slick, iPhoney synthetic world where humans have become literal potatoes and everything’s more or less automated. For EVE, the first half of the film lets us see the more playful side of her and doesn’t mind being around Wall-E, but isn’t immediately won over with the concept of love. She’s still goal-oriented and trying to keep the two stuck on Earth would’ve made her arc as open-ended and ambiguous as The Good Dinosaur. Time on the axiom puts her original sense of thinking to the test when Wall-E tags along.

To share the bigger picture real quick, the human element of Wall-E is complimentary to Wall-E and EVE’s humane behavior. To quote RealJims’ honestly flawless analysis, “What better way to show the humanity in a robot than to be among humans that act like robots?” For Wall-E the robot, this works perfectly as a fish out of water story. His time on Earth affects not only a few humans, but other robots like MO and the secretary machine, as minor as it seems.

So when Wall-E seemingly fucks things up, EVE is rightfully peeved. His slip ups especially with the Diagnostics scene tests her goal-oriented nature and patience, to a tasteful comedic strength. Doesn’t mean they now turned Wall-E stupid, the film makes sure the monkey wrenches are only accidents from someone severely out of the loop of things. This leads them and us well into

The Depths of Space

The scene where Wall-E gets launched in the escape pod thrills me with joyfully painful suspense every time. EVE making a mad dash to him as Wall-E madly tries to get out of the soon exploding pod, leading to it exploding and we get this from EVE. The wide eyes of terror followed by the whispering “No”s gives me shivers every time I see it in full. 

Now one could argue her concern was more for the plant getting destroyed, but I say she was more frightened at the idea of both Wall-E and the plant getting nuked. While Wall-E did make her mad, she nonetheless cared about him and wasn’t expecting the tiny bot asshole to send him to death. So it’s like, “Oh no, both my purpose and the one that helped me are both gone.” 

Luckily, thanks to some foreshadowing, Wall-E made it out alive with the plant in safe keeping and EVE seeing Wall-E actually care about her goal makes her beam with joy, being that reasonable spark that brings the two closer together. I mean if your love interest cheated death to help you out, why wouldn’t it? Everything about this moment is what made EVE stick with me long after I watched the film; the emotional journey the director was able to convey with her is so well-built to this point, it’s still amazing how they were able to do it with little dialogue or facial expressions. I especially love the emptiness we get of the two of them in space, where it adds focus to the two of them especially. But my god, that’s only half of it...

The space dance sequence between the two is still one of Pixar’s most gorgeous scenes. The way Wall-E is able to keep up with the fire extinguisher after having trouble in the film’s beginning, the wide shots of space, the lovely glow of the engines, the music. I especially like to think of this scene as a parallel to EVE’s initial flight on Earth. For her, it was that rite of passage after the touchdown and now she gets to share that same moment with someone she’s grown to like or appreciate. Then again, this isn’t the moment where EVE loves Wall-E. We’re close, but we need that one inch to finally show her the truth. That’s when she sees

The Recordings

The moment where EVE gets to see the memories of her time on Earth, including her dormant stasis, is where shit finally clicks. She essentially gets to know how Wall-E felt not only about her, but about love. Even when she couldn’t be there, she sees now that Wall-E cared about her and is able to process what Wall-E processed when he looked at Hello Dolly at one point. Scene also works because getting her directive, or the plant, was generally done and done with, she finally gets time to focus on something else, on her feelings for someone else. This leads well into... the well that leads to...

The Dumpster Moment

The scene with the recordings is where things finally click, but the moment with EVE and Wall-E in the ship’s dump is where it comes together. After getting betrayed yet again by AUTO, EVE’s concerns are now less with the plant and more for Wall-E and thanks to the moment previous, I can totally buy this. It’s teeth gritting seeing her try to rescue a now broken Wall-E from getting ejected into space and losing his energy thanks to a destroyed chip. So when we see her finally toss the plant aside and says Wall-E is her directive now, I tear up. It feels like a genuine, built up declaration on her part; the moment where EVE can rationally return his feelings ten-fold and truly be there for him. But that isn’t all to it, because Wall-E reasonably struggles his way to the plant to show that to save him, they need to get to Earth which means getting the plant back to the core of the ship.

This gives EVE newfound resolve and puts that to the test, where she has to basically defect against AUTO who’s become the physical antagonist of the film. The escape sequence is a bit of a step down since putting humans in danger doesn’t really affect the film’s themes all that well, but I can’t argue that pitting the captain against AUTO is a bad climax. 

The Death to Wall-E

Thinking about this film after so long, it is still pretty fucking shocking to realize how punishing they treat Wall-E in the final act. It’s even more shocking when you realize how the roles have reversed, where Wall-E focuses more on EVE’s goal with the plant instead of EVE herself and vice versa. Then again, I say it’s fair that they did this, to show how much Wall-E was willing to sacrifice for the one he loves which makes the painful wails we hear from EVE feel all the more impactful. Like you’re serious with her as she struggles to accept his death before they reach Earth. And speaking of Earth...

The Finale

Now, I can’t help but argue it’s an unfortunate plothole that EVE is somehow able to fully repair Wall-E in spite of never fixing anything else in the film. Then again, it’s fucking pumping seeing her move quick to put him back together and it’s that final stomp on the heart when, even when he’s fully restored, Wall-E bares no memories of her or anything. You see her desperately try to get him to remember anything only to be met with an emotionless, reset shell. In finally understanding Wall-E’s feelings of love, she can’t really be with him. Until...

True Love’s Kiss Saves the day

I can get scientific with how getting his memories back was possible, but I won’t because the scene just works. It’s quiet, takes it time, and that last eureka moment with the two truly get to hold hands makes up for any scattered logistics. I’d say this is where Wall-E finally gets the love, but the same can be said for EVE, after everything she went through. I’ve admittedly seen a few talk about how the female lead is only valid through the love of another, typically male, but I believe what works 120% here is that the two characters basically have themselves figured out, Wall-E more than EVE, and EVE’s journey is never hindered for a sudden realization to love. She still succeeds in her mission, but the stakes for her have risen once she comes to terms with her newfound feelings and these feelings aren’t out of pocket. Wall-E has his feelings for EVE from the getgo, but dedicates to helping EVE with the goal, even if it means death. The connection they get to have is earned and is what drives the plot. EVE earns what she realizes she wants and that makes her a great female protagonist in my eye.

The Conclusion

Wall-E is a pretty warm movie; a film how the love of two brings humanity to salvation and vice versa. How EVE and Wall-E’s love is synonymous to the intertwining of modern and older technology to shape the world. But honestly, that probably wouldn’t have worked as well without how great they made EVE as a character. Wall-E is great too, but it’s astonishing to see EVE’s journey with Wall-E and show her natural growth of understanding something as warm as romance. Her journey is pretty synonymous to how I feel with the movie overall. The time we get of them on Earth is symbiotic to the time we get in space; we get an intimate journey that expands to a film about society but remains personal and intimate nonetheless. And with EVE, we get this superbly fleshed out character that’s emotive, understanding, and above all gets a resolves that’s awesome to see every time I catch or just think about this film. What else is there to say?

They’re the Best.

[raisondetempete]

Monochrome Obsession (Yandere Wu Chang x Female Reader) Part II

Link to Part I

Link to Part III

If you like my writing, check this out

Story under line

(y/n) - your name

(o/c) - outfit of choice

(h/s) - hairstyle of choice

Character Index:

Wu Chang - Black and White

Fan Wujiu - Black

Xie Bi’an- White

Fiona - Priestess

Kreacher - Thief

Eli - Seer

Naib - Mercenary

Mike - Acrobat

Martha - Coordinator

Norton - Prospector

Patricia - Enchantress

Servais - Magician

William - Forward

Tracy - Mechanic

William - Forward

Emma - Gardener

Helena - The Mind’s Eye

Aesop - Embalmer

Emily - Doctor

Kurt - Explorer

You don’t know how long its been since you were imprisoned. The only way you could keep track of the days when you were in the Survivor’s side of the manor was that there was a match every day, so you could just the count the number of matches there’s been. However, as Black and White weren’t the hunters in every match, you have no way to keep track of how long its been.

As for how the two hunters were treating you, it’s been as if you were a high-security prisoner at a very luxurious resort. There are two conjoined rooms that make up Wu Chang’s sleeping quarters as there are two hunters in one body. It was decided when you first were imprisoned that White’s room was to become the bedroom while Black’s room was to become the living room as both men were sleeping with you.

Originally, you were accompanied everywhere by at least one of the two men, always having a hand on you. The only time they would not have a hold on you was when you used the bathroom. However, much to your protesting and extreme embarrassment, one of them had to present in the bathroom with you (with their back turned of course).

When they were in a match, you were chained up by your hands and legs to the bed, barely able to move an inch, until they returned. Along with the discomfort of being tied up, you were incredibly bored.

Your head wound from where Black hit you needed stitches, which were provided by an apologetic Black. It’s mostly healed but it’ll likely leave a scar on your temple.

You haven’t tried to escape while you were imprisoned. Even if you could move while Wu Chang was in a match, that would leave twelve hunters (eleven if there was a 2v8 match). It’s impossible for one person to be able to escape undetected by themselves.

You are waken up by the feeling of two harsh stares on you. You open your eyes only to let out a surprised gasp. Black and White are both staring down at you, White on the left and Black on the right, love shining in both of their eyes

“Sorry, darling, for scaring you,” White apologizes.

“We just thought you would be excited to hear what we have to say to you,” Black continues.

“What is it?” you cautiously ask.

“As you’ve been so good,” Black begins.

“We’ve decided to let you have more freedom,” White finishes.

“Really?!!” you exclaim, almost not believing your ears. Black lowly laughs while White beams at your excited face.

“We have a match today,” White starts.

“And we know how bored you’ve been…” Black trails off.

“And?” You were practically dying from suspense.

“Why don’t you get changed first, angel,” Black replies as both males get off the bed. You leap out of bed, dash over to your dresser filled to the brim with clothes that perfectly fit you. It always disturbs you that they knew your exact size. Pulling out an (o/c), you sprint to the bathroom.

You close the door and lock it.

‘I wonder why they didn’t follow me? Well, I’m not complaining,’ you think to yourself. You pull on your clothes before hurridly into a (h/s) (Ignore this if you don’t want to put up your hair or don’t have long enough hair). Unlocking the door, you step out to see Black and White perching eagerly on the bed. You put your pyjamas down on the dresser before walking over to the duo.

“What is it?” you question.

“You’ve been so good since we started dating,” Black begins. You internally cringe at the last part of the sentence.

“We thought that you must’ve been bored while we’re away,” White continues.

“We’ve decided to let you be free to walk around while we’re gone,” they conclude in unison. Standing in awed silence, you say,

“Really?!!” Thank you!” Not being able to control yourself, you hug both of the taller men in appreciation. When you did so, you’re unable to see the deep blush that appears on both of their faces. You’ve never reciprocated any of their acts of love, much less initiated one yourself. It’s a pleasant surprise for them.

“There’s one condition, however,” White says. You pull away from the hug, much to the dismay of the two hunters.

“What’s the condition?” you nervously question. Black only gives you a smirk before walking over to the closet both males shared. You eye him as he shuffles around in the closet before grabbing something and turning towards you. Eyes widening, you shudder as Black approaches you with a long chain.

“W-What’s that for?” you splutter.

“You’ll be chained to the leg of the bed while we’re in matches. The chain will be long enough for you to be able to go to the living room and the bathroom,” Black answers you. He walks over to the corner of the bed closest to the living room and leans down to put one end of the chain around the leg. Black stands up and advances towards you. Crawling backward on the bed, you keep your eyes on Black. A sense of déjà vu hits you as White grabs you, more specifically your left leg. Continuing to struggle, you push your hands against White’s firm chest, but to no avail. 

“Do you want to be chained up to the bed that badly? How lewd of you,” Black smirks before cuffing your ankle to the bedpost. Once he does so, White releases you.

“We have a match in about five minutes so that gives us a few minutes to see if the chain fits you,” White explains.

“It should. We had it custom made for you,” Black replies. This creeps you out even more. You walk away from the two hunters into the living room—not bothering to close the door due to the chain— and sit down on the grey sofa with a huff. You fiddle with your hands in your lap, thinking. Yes, your situation now was breed than your original situation, but that doesn’t mean you like still being chained up.

White and Black come into the room and sit themselves on either side of you, Black on your right and White on your left. Noting your anxious form, White reassuringly pets the top of your head.

“Love, we’re sorry. We want to let you be free but we can’t trust you not to escape,” White soothingly whispers into your ear. In response, you move your head away from him.

“Looks like she likes me more than you Xie,” Black smirks. White shoots him a murderous look. It isn’t joking.

“It was a joke for fuck’s sake!” Black says, putting his hands up. Hugging you possessively, White scowls at him. 

“Umm… don’t you have a match today?” You question. Both men sneer at the thought.

“Well, I suppose we should be going. Fan, let’s get this over with,” White sighs. Black groans.

“I guess we should. Bye then, doll,” Black says. Both men kiss you on either cheek, with White on the left cheek and Black on the right cheek, like they always do before leaving for a match. You blink once, acknowledging their affection. Black and White frown at your lackluster reaction, before leaving the room through the living room door that leads to the rest of the mansion. You hear a click come from the door behind them and footsteps to the bedroom door before another click is heard. You’re locked in.

With a growl of frustration, you stalk over to one of the bookshelves and grab a random book, not really caring what the book is about. You sit back down on the couch with a groan before opening the book.

You try reading the book for a minute but one thought keeps reoccurring in your mind.

‘What if the doors aren’t locked? Maybe they were trying to trick me,’ holding your chin in your hand, you ponder. ‘It doesn’t hurt to try…’ You walk over to the living room door only to be stopped a yard away from the door by the chain around your right ankle. You strain your arm out to reach the doorknob. However, no matter how much you reach, you can’t reach the doorknob. You run over to the bedroom door and try reaching for the doorknob, but you still can’t reach it.

You growl and stomp your right foot in anger, ignoring the harsh tug of the chain. Those damn hunters! Always one step ahead of you. You stomp back into the living room and collapse into a heap onto the sofa, hitting your head on the book abandoned on the sofa.

“Oww…” you moan as you clutch your head. Luckily, it’s the back of your head you hit and not the gash on the left side of your forehead.

That’s when you get an odd feeling, like a calling throughout your body. It feels familiar, reminding you of someone. You walk over to the nearest wall and touch it. As soon as you touch it, a faint blue outline of a circle appears. You take a step backward and wait for the portal to finish forming. After a couple of seconds, the portal turns mostly navy except for a glowing cyan eye.

Fiona emerges from the portal, clutching her metal ring close to her chest. When she sees you, a triumphant smile appears on her face.

“It worked!” she cheers. “Wait here for a second.” Fiona turns around and goes back into the portal, leaving a faint white outline of herself. She quickly returns again, but this time she’s with others.

Kreacher is the first to emerge, his shifty eyes darting anxiously around the room as if he expects all the hunters in the mansion to suddenly burst into the room. Eli’s next, blindfolded face staring towards you.

“Hi (y/n),” Eli greets, putting his hand up as his owl, perching on his shoulder, hoots softly. Naib appears behind him, deep eyes peering suspiciously at his surroundings. Mike is the second to last person to come out. He shoots you a grin before heading to both doors leading to the rest of the manor to set up his muck bombs. Martha is the last to appear, twirling a flair gun in each hand as she casually saunters into the room.

“How did you get two flair guns?” you question.

“Wu Chang breaks the rules, I break the rules,” Martha replies with a smirk. Turning to the chain around your ankle, she orders,

“Kreacher, pick the lock and quick! We don’t know how long everyone can keep them occupied.” Kreacher grumbles as he crouches down by your ankle.

“Margaretha, Norton, Patricia, and Servaisare keeping them occupied,” Mike explains to you.

“I’ve been sending my owl to keep an eye on you since you’ve been captured. When I saw they relaxed on your security, I knew it was time to strike,” Eli continues. A clicking sound is heard as the shackle around your ankle falls off.

“Thanks, Kreacher,” you beam at him. Kreacher only mutters before turning away from you. You, however, glimpse his burning red cheeks before his face is fully turned.

“Let’s get through the portal before-” “Before what?” An angry voice cuts Fiona off. You all wheel around to see a very pissed White appear from a shadowy corner, rage flaring through his eyes. Naib instantly reacts, putting himself between you and the White Guard.

“How are you here? You’re supposed to be in the match?” A very confused Norton asks.

“Fan is in the match. We had a feeling something like this would happen,” White sneers.

“This is no time for dawdling!” (y/n), get through the portal! Now!” Matha yells before pointing one of her flair guns at White. White only tsks as a glowing turquoise ring appears around the room before Martha could shoot him. Everyone is replaced by Whites, all coming closer to you. You make a dash for the portal, only to find you can’t go through with your soul siphoned.

You’re grabbed from behind as White hauls you into his arms.

“Tsk-tsk, darling. Did you really think you could get away that easily?” White coos.

“(y/n)! Duck!” Martha shouts before a flair gun collides with White’s body. He lets a groan of pain as he drops you. Mike throws a firebomb at the hunter as Eli’s owl hovers protectively in front of you. Naib harshly grabs your arm and throws you into the portal.

You fall through the portal and collapse onto the floor on the survivor’s side of the mansion. You look up to see all of the rest of the survivors looking down at you.

“(y/n), are you okay?” Tracy’s shy voice asks you as William hoists you up from the ground.

“I-I think so. Just shaken up,” you reply, fatigue evident in your voice. You take a step away from the portal just as a panic stricken Kreacher and Fiona appear. Kreacher dashes away, obviously spooked.

“Is everyone okay?” you whisper, afraid of the answer. Fiona nods.

“I think so. They should be through in a second,” Fiona reassuringly smiles, yet there’s a hint of fear in her eyes. You reach out to hug her but she’s suddenly pushed to the ground as Naib, Marth, Eli, and Mike sprint through the portal.

“Ouch!” Fiona moans under the pile of survivors.

“Sorry,” they all murmur as they get off of her. Fiona stands up and rubs her head. It’s then that the portal disappears with a hiss.

“What happened?” Emma asks, curiosity glittering in her eyes. Eli lets out a sigh.

“When we got into Wu Chang’s room, (y/n)’s ankle was chained to the bed. Kreacher was able to pick the lock but White interrupted us before we could leave.”

“White? He’s supposed to be in the match,” Helena’s shocked voice speaks.

“He can separate,” you explain.

“I knew that he could separate, but I thought they would both be in the match. I’m so stupid,” Eli groans.

“It’s okay. You had no way of knowing,” you pat his shoulder. He in return smiles at you.

“Anyways, White siphoned all of souls and picked (y/n) up.

“But I shot him,” Martha proudly beams.

“Naib threw (y/n) through the portal. That really made White mad. It was terrifying,” Fiona shudders at the memory. “Kreacher and I knew we wouldn’t be much help so we left.”

“White tried killing us,” Naib simply says. Guilt instantly floods your system.

“Are you okay? You shouldn’t have come to save me,” you babble. Martha shoots you a smile.

“It’s fine. We were worried about you,” Martha reassures. You shoot her a dubious glare, making her laugh.

“I used an mud bomb to slow down his movements,” Mike cheerfully grins.

“I shot him with my remaining flare gun, giving Naib time to grab me and Eli and elbow padded us through the portal,” Martha continues.

“I guess Naib doesn’t care about me,” Mike pouts.

“I don’t,” Naib deadpans. Martha and Eli restrain Mike from launching onto the Mercenary, much to the amusement to everyone else. Your eyes scan the group to find someone, only to find them absent.

“Umm, where’s Aesop?” you question. The laughter dies down as everyone becomes grim-faced again.

“...He’s in a coma,” Emily sighs. Your eyes widen as your mouth goes agape.

“Oh god… this is all my fault,” you murmur, clutching your head in your hands. “Where is he?”

“He’s in the infirmary. I can…” But you aren’t able to hear the last part of Emily’s sentence as you’re already sprinting in the direction of the infirmary

When you reach the infirmary, you practically break the door down with how fast you’re going. Looking around, you see a pale Aesop lying on a hospital bed. He had a wide gash on his forehead that looked like it was made by the end of a pole. Multiple bruises and cuts are all over the visible parts of his body. Wu Chang seems to have hit Aesop over the head and beaten him into a state of unconsciousness if he wasn’t unconscious already. Someone had removed Aesop’s surgical mask, making him look even more broken.

You crouch down by his bedside and clutch his right hand, before resting your head on his barely-moving chest. Feeling helpless, you begin softly sobbing. A hand on your shoulder interrupts your wallowing.

“It’s not your fault,” Emily whispers into your ear.

“What d-do you mean? It’s all been m-my fault,” you cry, hiccupping as you speak.

“No, it’s not,” Emily soothes you, rubbing your back tenderly. “You didn’t choose to be targeted by Wu Chang.” You numbly nod, not knowing what else to do. That’s Patricia bursts through the doorway.

“Emily! Wu Chang surrendered! We need to get (y/n) before- Oh,” Patricia cuts off her rant when she sees you. ‘That’s odd’ you think. ‘Black doesn’t know what happened... unless they can communicate while separated!’ Your heart stops and, judging by Emily’s suddenly tense body, she came to the same conclusion.

“Patricia! Tell everyone that Wu Chang is coming! (y/n), come with me. We need to find somewhere for you to hide,” Emily commands.

“What’s going on?” A very confused Patricia asks.

“Everyone else will fill you in,” Emily hurriedly responds. Patricia nods, knowing not to question Emily’s authoritative behavior. Patricia rushes out of the room while Emily turns to you.

“(y/n), do you have your book? It’ll be helpful for knowing Wu Chang’s future actions,” Emily questions. Sadly, you shake your head.

“When they first kidnapped me, they took away my book and destroyed it in front of me,” you sigh, remembering how they tore it to shreds before burning it, saying that there was no longer a need for it when you had them. Emily groans.

“Let’s go find Kurt. You can use his book to hide,” Emily suggests. You nod your head in agreement and you both go to try and find the Explorer.

When you find Kurt a minute later, you find him and the rest of the survivors in the entrance hall, the farthest point in the survivors’ side of the mansion from the hunters’ side. Martha and Naib are barking orders at everyone while everyone else solemnly listens. Emily quickly finds Kurt in the crowd.

“Kurt, may we borrow your book?” Emily asks. Kurt looks uncertain. He usually hides with his book from the hunters the second he gets a heartbeat.

“We thought we could use it to hide (y/n),” Emily continues. Kurt sighs, the kind side of him winning over his scared side.

“Sure. Keep it as long as you need it,” Kurt replies, handing you his book.

“Now, to decide where to hide,” you mutter. Emily puts her hand up to her chin and hums in concentration

“Why don’t you hide in the infirmary’s closet. That way I can keep an eye on you without looking suspicious,” Emily suggests. “I can be ‘healing’ Patricia so she can guard you.”

“That’s a great idea!” you beam. Emily offers a small smile before turning to Martha and Naib and tells them her plan. Martha nods before sending Patricia to assist you.

The three of you return to the silent infirmary. Aesop hasn’t moved an inch since you left.

“(y/n), go into the closet and hide somewhere. We’ll be right outside,” Patricia orders. You nod nervously. Emily shoots you a calming smile.

“Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. They won’t find you,” she soothes, but the uncertainty in her eyes says otherwise. You turn and go into the closet. It isn’t that big, just slightly bigger than a broom closet. Stacks of medical equipment and boxes of medicine are on the shelves and in piles on the floor, making the already small closet smaller.

You decide to hide in the far left corner behind a stack of boxes containing who knows what. You open the book and immediately feel yourself shrink. Easily maneuvering through the small crooks and crannies between the boxes, you reach the corner of the wall. Sighing, you lean against the wall, waiting to see what the future holds.

You wait in silent darkness for what feels like hours before a feminine scream pierces through the night.

‘Tracy!’ you internally shout. There is silence before there is a sound of slow footsteps echoing in the hallways.

“(y/n), where are you?” Black coos. “I won’t punish you that much if you come out now.” You let out a small whimper as you press yourself further against the wall. There is a minute of tense quiet with the only sound being agonizingly slow footfalls. Suddenly, the infirmary door slams open.

“Where is she?” an angry Black growls. Even though you’re certain that he doesn’t know where you are, you still that you’re going to be discovered at any moment.

“She’s not here,” Patricia drawls.

“That’s odd. I thought I felt her presence here,” Black cooly responds.

“You’ve must have been mistaken then,” Emily replies. Although her voice is steady, it’s obvious that she’s nervous.There’s the sound of footsteps coming to the closet door before it’s slammed open, dousing the dank room in light. You don’t dare to even move a muscle. There is a tense moment of silence.

“Tch,” Black clicks before the closet door is shut with a bang. You inwardly let out a sigh of relief. There are more footsteps leading away from the door.

“W-What are you doing?” Emily stammers, the weak facade of calmness gone.

“Just getting rid of a pest while I’m here,” Black hums. There is the sound of a long object scraping against the floor.

“Don’t hurt him!” Patricia shouts. Your mind quickly puts the pieces together. Aesop! You grow big before bursting out of the door.

“Get away from him!” you scream. Black smirks down as you as Emily’s eyes widen while Patricia glares at the tall hunter.

“Knew it~” Black purrs. He rings his bell, making everyone fall to the ground before stabbing Aesop through the chest with his umbrella. Blood blossoms from his chest like a crimson flower opening its petals as scarlet trickles down from his mouth, creating a red river of death. Aesop exhales sharply, then falls still

“NO!!” Emily cries out.

“You bastard!” Patricia snarls as long stuns him, too angry to move from where she’s rooted in place. You fall to the floor in agony, tears seeping from your eyes. No. Not Aesop. Not your best friend. No. It’s not true. No. Black laughs cruelly, the stun already over, as he walks over to your fallen form.

“Oh no you- AHHH!!!” Patricia screams as a loud crack rings through the room. A menacingly smiling White grips on the Enchantress’ arm, forcing it to bend it at an impossible angle, rendering it useless. Her monkey skull falls from her grasp and rolls to the side.

“Good job, Xie,” Black smirks as he scoops you up. Emily tries to come to your aid, but White stabs her in the left leg before she could do so. She falls to the ground with a cry. 

“Please! Let them go! You have what you want,” you beg.

“Darling, although I adore seeing your begging face, you didn’t come out when we called for you, so you need to be punished.”

“Plus, you only came out when I threatened that embalmer, Black snarls. Both men’s eyes darken.

“Hold her for a second, Xie,” Black requests. White nods and you’re put in his arms. Black cackles as he walks over to the fallen Patricia.

“You’ve had this coming for a long time, bitch,” Black spits before positioning his blood-soaked umbrella over Patricia’s head. Aesop’s blood drips onto her sweaty face as she closes her eyes in defeat.

“No!” Surprisingly, White accompanies Emily and your cries of protest. 

“Fan,” White continues. “The owner said we can only kill the embalmer as punishment for the survivors coming to the hunter’s side of the manor. If we kill another, we can’t keep (y/n).” Black growls before stabbing Patricia in the right leg. A loud crunch sounds as he stabs straight through the bone as blood spurts like a geyser from the crater in her leg. Patricia lets out a blood-curdling scream. 

She’ll never be able to use that leg again.

You resist the urge to throw up as Emily limps over to help the fallen Enchantress. Black and White sadistically grin at the sight.

“Shall we leave with our love?” White beams.

“I believe we should,” Black agrees.

“I’m sorry. This is all my fault,” you sob as you’re carried away from the two women and the corpse of Aesop.

“Shh,” White breathes into your ear. “It’s their fault for taking you.”

“We knew something like this would happen, so we took precautions,” Black explains from his position on the right side of you. “They’ll never be able to steal you away from us,” they say in unison. You cry harder at the thought. They both try to comfort you as you’re carried to the other side of the mansion, but to no avail. You quickly fall asleep in White’s arms from fatigue and see your best friend’s life taken in front of you.

You awake to heavy breaths hitting your face. Your eyes shoot open before they widen. Black and White have their faces inches from you, intentently observing you.

“W-What are you doing?” you stutter. You try to push them away, only to realize your arms are chained to the headboard of the bed. Scared, you try to kick them but they’re also chained wide open to the bed. Both of the hunters chuckle at your panic-stricken face.

“You tried to run from us,” White coos, his eyes glowing sinerstily despite the sympathetic look on his face.

“Plus, you didn’t come out when we called for you,” Black purrs with a sadistic grin, not even pretending to be sorry for your current predicament.

“Your punishment will be harsh so that it will forever be ingrained in your mind that you’re forever be ours,” they hum as they grab at your clothes. You weep as one thought echoes in your mind.

You will never escape this living hell.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

AU where Rachel acquires a female red tailed hawk and gets stuck to be with Tobias, instead of begging him to get stuck as a human

Answered here!

Anon, yours just happens to be the ~10,000th comment in this general motif, so congratulations, you’re a winner!  You get to hear my thoughts about my slight but nagging frustration with this general trend even though there is nothing whatsoever wrong with this specific ask.

I get a LOT of asks about “improving” or “fixing” Rachel’s and Tobias’s relationship, or else making Tobias “healthier” or “better off” — through changing Rachel’s behavior.  I don’t believe anyone’s ever asked me about what Tobias could have done to be better to Rachel, in [checks blog stats] 4 years, ~2000 followers, and more unanswered than answered asks.  For that matter, the Jake/Cassie questions tend to be more neutral (or low-key racist, but that crap gets deleted immediately) like “what if they’d never broken up” or “what if they’d had a threesome with Ax” BUT I’ve still received one or two “what if Cassie had done better by Jake” and zero “what if Jake had done better by Cassie” at last count.  Because gender.

To give credit where it’s due: Rachel’s not great to Tobias in several instances.  She does a crappy job of expressing her worry that he’s going to die young in the opening of #33 (although I would argue against the interpretation that she’s deliberately trying to trap him in morph), she snaps at him in #37, and she inadvertently pressures him to fake good in #13.  However, she also listens to him and supports him when he’s trying to figure out his life in #13, when acknowledging that he does actually want to quit the war in #23, when struggling with the aftermath of Taylor’s crap in #33 and #40, and when being righteously pissed at Loren in #49.  She brings him food (#23), books (MM1), and company (#7).  She defends him from Marco’s bullying in the first several books, and from Jake’s impulse toward pity in the back half of the series. She makes him laugh, snaps him out of his own head, and bodily throws herself between him and danger time and again.

To give credit where it’s due: Tobias is not great to Rachel in several instances.  He tends to deal with problems in their relationship (most notably thinking that she’s Doing It Wrong when she tries to lead in #29 and #37) by muttering passive-aggressively and then going with the “oh, nothing, it’s all fine” routine when asked directly what’s wrong.  He makes her come to him 90% of the time when they’re hanging out, even though she’s a lot easier to find and access at home than he is.  He knows that she’s spiraling in #51 and #52, but mostly fails to reciprocate her support when he could instead go hang out with Marco and Ax.  However, he also loves Rachel and supports her through the extreme weirdness of her crisis in #32, snaps at Marco to get off her back any time Marco’s teasing goes too far (#12, #35, #43), responds to The Other Guy with amusement rather than possessiveness (#32, MM4), and helps bring out her softer side (#12, #33).

Anyway, those two don’t have a perfect relationship, and I think it’s up to debate whether they have a healthy relationship.  I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with speculating about how Rachel could have played a different role in Tobias’s life.  I do think that there’s something wrong with the way that normativity causes all of us (INCLUDING ME) to prioritize discussions of women’s obligation to provide support for male partners over men’s obligation to provide their support for partners of any gender.

[theblankgarden]

Dear Christa,

This story seems to have had many lives. It started as a play, first performed in 1930, in Leipzig, as Ritter Nérestan (“Knight Nérestan”), and later retitled as Gestern und heute (“Then and Now”, “Yesterday and Today”) for its premiere in Berlin. Its success led to a film adaptation in 1931, Mädchen in Uniform (“Girl in Uniform”, IMDb), directed by Leontine Sagan, and then to an English adaptation by Barbara Burnham, in 1932, performed as Children in Uniform, at the Duchess Theatre in London, starring Jessica Tandy as the protagonist Manuela.nThe story was then expanded and adapted into a novel, published in 1933, as Das Mädchen Manuela (“The Child Manuela”), and later it was once again made into a movie, in 1958, as Mädchen in Uniform (“Girl in Uniform”,  IMDb), directed by Géza von Radványi, starring Romy Schneider.

The story centres on Manuela von Meinhardis, a teenager who is sent to a strict Prussian boarding school for military officer’s daughters, and falls in love with one of her teachers, Fräulein Elisabeth von Bernburg. However, while the play and the two movie adaptations start with Manuela arriving at the boarding school, the novel starts with her birth and provides her backstory. We learn about her parents’ fraught marriage, which culminates with her mother’s death.

Throughout the novel, we are given hints of Manuela’s lesbianism: as a child, she feels strongly attracted to a somewhat cruel classmate, Eva, and later falls madly in love with the mother of Fritz, a boy who had a crush on her. Mistakenly believing that Manuela likes Fritz, her widowed father decides to send her to the boarding school. Unlike the play (and the two movie adaptations), it’s only halfway through the novel that Manuela arrives at the school.

We are then given a grim description of the girls’ lives at school – deprived of their personal possessions, uniformized in their appearance and behaviour, forbidden of developing affection for their peers, curtailed in their freedom to communicate with their parents, and even lacking enough food and proper heating. Except for one beloved teacher, Elisabeth von Bernburg, the rest of the staff is stern and indifferent to the girls’ predicament.

At the headmistress’s birthday party, the girls put on a play, and Manuela’s performance at the leading male role is a success. After the play, excited by the impact of her performance on her beloved teacher, Manuela gets drunk and yells her love for Bernburg. The revelation comes as a shock for the headmistress as well as for the schoolgirls: Manuela is punished with strict isolation, and Bernburg is dismissed.

The play and the novel end on a darker note than the two movie adaptations. Whereas in the novel Bernburg capitulates to the headmistress’ decision and tells Manuela to stop loving her (“You must be cured of loving me“), in the film she dares to side with Manuela and challenges the headmistress’ authority (“What you call sin I call the great spirit of love, which has a thousand forms“). While, in the play as in the novel, Manuela makes a tragic decision, the two movie adaptations end on a more positive note with a victory of love and transgression over indifference and order.

In the novel as in the play, the homoerotic atmosphere is at the foreground, while in the movie adaptations this aspect is downplayed as a teenage crush on the part of Manuela and as a motherly affection on the part of the teacher. In the novel, however, Manuela repeatedly rejects femininity and wishes to have been born a boy; after the play at the headmistress’ party, her classmates even proclaim that she is a ‘half a boy’.

1931 movie adaptation

1931 movie adaptation

1958 movie adaptation

1931 movie adaptation: on the left, Erika Mann as one of the teachers

1932 British theatre adaptation with Jessica Tandy as Manuela

The homoeroticism is expressed in the novel by the sexual tension between Manuela and Eva, as well as by the fact that the boarding-school classmates are constantly shown holding hands, dancing in each other’s’ arms, and passing love notes. Differently from the movies, in the book, Oda, one of Manuela’s classmates, even touches her body with admiration and tries to kiss her.

In the novel, Manuela’s feelings for Bernburg are more openly reciprocated. Moreover, in the scene where the teacher gives the girl one of her chemises, this is more clearly depicted as an erotic token – as if, in a game of seduction, Bernburg were simultaneously nourishing and discouraging the girl’s affection: “I think of you, too, Manuela. But you know I can’t make exceptions. The others would be jealous.”

While in the novel the role played by the teacher is less ambiguous, in the movie adaptations she is depicted as a motherly figure whose tenderness may have been misunderstood by Manuela. Whereas in the movies Bernburg is a transgressive character and a humanist, in the play she is seen in a less optimistic light, as a woman who nurtures the girls’ feelings simply because she longs to be the headmistress herself – and we are then led to question the nature of student-teacher dynamic.

In the play as in the novel, Bernburg does not resign in the final confrontation with the headmistress, but rather conforms to her final decision. In the two movie adaptations, Bernburg is depicted as an embodiment of the criticism against the Prussian militaristic order: she is an antiauthoritarian figure who, by resigning from her job in the end, repudiates her role as an agent of the repressive order at the school.

In the novel and in the play, however, her stance is more ambiguous and less simplistic. Rather than a woman coming out to oppose oppression and embrace love, Bernburg is an agent of oppression in disguise: “You mustn’t persuade yourself it isn’t nice here”, she says to Manuela at one point. Rather than transgressing order, Bernburg is the agent who enforces it by making the oppression bearable – and she does so, by creating and being the centrepiece of a highly charged, homoerotic atmosphere.

In the novel, the story is told from different perspectives (particularly in the first half) through short sentences – which not only mimics a child’s point of view, but also prevents the narrative from slipping into melodrama. Although I love Therese Giehse’s brilliant take on the headmistress’ role in the 1958 movie adaptation, I prefer the 1931 more symbolic, less didactic ending: as the schoolgirls disobey the headmistress order and come to Manuela’s rescue, they stay in the light, grouped together with Fräulein von Bernburg, while the headmistress, defeated, retreats down the hall into the shadows. The silence is broken by the rhythmic sound of her cane tapping on the floor and the clanging of bells in the distance, pointing perhaps to the beginning of a new order, in which Fräulein von Bernburg wins ascendancy precisely by rejecting her old role as an enforcer of oppression.

As I’ve said at the beginning, this story has had many lives, and they seem, at the same time, to complement and to contradict one another. While the novel and the play are more consistently darker, I like the fact that, in the movies (and, in particular, in the 1931 adaptation), affection and love (and, in this case, homosexual love) are shown to pose a powerful threat to an oppressive order where girls are brought up for obedience and procreation: “You are all soldiers’ daughters and, God willing, you will all be soldiers’ mothers“, says the headmistress at one point.

Although the school is an all-woman environment, it is definitely not a space defined by female authority. Your girls in uniform are not only trapped within the school’s high walls and barred windows, but also within very confining, uniformed roles, set in iron by a will that lies outside their cage. Manuela may well be able to break it, but she will have to break her body, too, against its bars.

Yours truly,

J.

Aleksander Augustynowicz. Artist’s Daughters. 1907

About the book

Play: Gestern und Heute (1930, also known as Ritter Nérestan)

Adapted as Children in Uniform, by Barbara Burnham (1932)

Novel: Das Mädchen Manuela (1933 also known as Mädchen in Uniform).

Translated as The Child Manuela, tr. Agnes Neill Scott (Virago, 1994, Goodreads)

My rating: 4 stars

I read this book for German Lit Month

My thoughts on Mädchen in Uniform (“Girl in Uniform"), by Christa Winsloe (1933) #queerlit #germanlitmonth Dear Christa, This story seems to have had many lives. It started as a play, first performed in 1930, in Leipzig, as…

[whipped-for-kpop-fics]

Once Upon a Time

Sicheng(WinWin) x female (Y/n) fluff oneshot

Once upon a time, a girl and a boy met and were so painfully clueless that they spent months hopelessly pining after one another.

Approximately seven months, three weeks and two days ago, you fell in love for the first time. Not like you were counting or anything...no way.

Ever since you were little, you had loved fairytales and the idea of love at first sight, true love's kiss, being swept off your feet by prince charming. You had always dreamed of meeting someone and falling in love, spending happily ever after with them.

From the first moment your eyes met Sicheng's from across the room of the little cafe, you knew he was the one. The one you were going to spend your life with. The one you could grow old with. The one you would love unconditionally until you had no more love to give.

Exactly seven months, three weeks and two days ago, you had bravely approached Sicheng and offered a sweet smile around the syllables of your name. He jumped up from his seat to greet you politely with an innocent, beautiful smile of his own. His friends noticed how you looked at him and pretty much barred him from the table to make him find a new place with you, they weren't even subtle about it either. But you didn't care, you weren't even embarrassed that your intentions were blindingly obvious, not if it meant you had the handsome stranger to yourself for a while.

A while stretched into all day as the pair of you sat in the cafe, sharing plates of cake and various sweet treats and sipping on drinks until the staff told you it was closing time. Even then, the two of you talked animatedly as you walked side by side all the way back to your dorm building as Sicheng was too much of a gentleman to let you walk home alone.

Upon stopping at the entrance door of your building, you turned to Sicheng, anticipating a goodbye kiss after what was the best date you had ever been on. Your heart thrummed excitedly in your chest when he stepped closer and leant in. But then his face completely passed yours to swoop in and hug you warmly. The words he spoke next shattered the illusion of the romantic rose hue you had painted across the whole day. "I've never had a female friend before, I'm glad we met, Y/N." You couldn't even respond, feeling like he had ripped your heart from your body and gripped it tight to deflation.

Then he backed off and waved goodbye, promising to text you in the morning before leaving with a clueless smile on his face and your heart broken in his hands.

Ever since, you had grown to accept the role of Sicheng's best friend, his only female friend. Upon realising that he could hang out with girls as easily as guys, Sicheng no longer shied away from the advances of females, innocently not realising they wanted a little more than friendship from him. At first, you would glare at every girl that got to close to your best friend but slowly, you gave up realising he wouldn't notice their flirtations unless they stuck their naked breasts in his face.

Everyone but Sicheng knew you had approached him with romantic interests in mind and even though he showed literally no interest to you in the months since your feelings hadn't lessened. Annoyingly, they had grown bigger the more you got to know him until every glance of his eyes to you sent your heart thumping and begging to be loosened in his grasp so you could love him to your hearts full extent. But, you couldn't and you never would unless he let your heart go. How was he supposed to free your heart when he wasn't even aware he had it in the first place? Many times you had pondered just confessing to him but you didn't see the point, he clearly didn't reciprocate your feelings so it would only make your relationship needlessly awkward inevitably leading to your bond breaking and Sicheng leaving you alone with the battered remains of your heart. How could a heart that only knew his clueless touch beat within his presence?  You feared it couldn't so you stayed quiet and suffered alone.

Though now and then, you would lose your cool when he'd let another girl get even a little of his interest and forget that you were trying to protect yourself by keeping your feelings to yourself. In the time you had known Sicheng, he had never had any romantic interest in anyone but you had seen his eyes shimmer with the start of lust when he saw an attractive girl. You knew he was capable of feeling at least sexual attraction if not romantic so, on times when your jealousy and possessiveness over him would surface, you'd use that fact to your advantage.

It was one of these times, one of these times that you decided to reveal a little more skin than usual, put on the beginnings of a seductive act, that things changed drastically.

"Wow, Y/N-" Jaehyun whistled lowly when you entered the lounge of Sicheng's dorm building. Jaehyun happened to be one of Sicheng's closest friends and there the day you tried to win over Sicheng's attraction and he certainly knew all about your feelings for the other male. In fact, Jaehyun seemed to want your relationship with Sicheng to develop almost as much as you. He certainly always pointed out your positives to Sicheng and made an effort to bring attention to your beauty and sex appeal whenever possible. Honestly, you were beginning to debate just jumping onto Jaehyun's lap and using him to relieve some of your sexual frustrations that Sicheng caused. You had even voiced the thought to Jaehyun one day and he was genuinely tempted to drag you onto his lap himself but, it was clear to him that Sicheng was the man you truly needed. He didn't want to do anything to risk that.

A seductive grin stretched your lips as you walked over to stand in the centre of the room and twirl, allowing everyone in the room to take in your entire outfit. Not that there was a lot to it, you had really gone all out this time. A little skin tight black dress that left none of your curves to the imagination. The neckline was so low that almost half of your breasts were on view but thankfully, it stopped before you could have a fatal nipple slip. Though you did debate "accidentally" letting one slide out just to give Sicheng glimpse at what he was missing by not claiming you as his own. On your feet you wore simple black three-inch heels, the perfect height to leave your lips level with Sicheng if you stood before him, not like you had meticulously measured your heights subtly and sat doing simple math that left your mind fogged with the possibilities this little height change could lead to.

"Hm, you like Jaehyunie?" You purred, stopping when you were facing him, purposely not giving Sicheng attention but whether it be fate or a happy little coincidence, Sicheng was sat on the couch directly opposite Jaehyun meaning your back was to him. Jeahyun raised his eyebrows at you with a flirty expression. His eyes flickered behind you to check Sicheng's reaction. Upon his gaze returning to once again meet yours, the smirk on his face told you it all. Sicheng was definitely looking at you and that gave you the perfect opportunity to step closer to Jaehyun and lean over to "fix his shit collar". Really, you were just taking the chance to give Sicheng view of the lacy red lingerie you wore under your dress that left very little to the imagination indeed.

"Yah!" Sicheng's yell made you jolt, not expecting him to raise his voice. Suddenly, he was turning you upright. A smirk twitched your lips as his chest pressed to your back and for a moment, you thought you had finally gotten to him but then his fingers were working to tug the hem of your dress down a little further to cover more of your skin and you groaned in defeat, dropping your head back against his shoulder. "Do you want everyone to see under your dress?" Sicheng scolded, eyes sliding to look at you sternly. He himself was affectionate so having your bodies pressed together and your head reclined against him didn't phase him in the slightest bit.

"You were the only one behind me." You pointed out. He blushed realising you knew he had seen under your dress. "Do you like my underwear, they're new." You purred and he suddenly pulled away to stalk across the room. His abrupt absence made you stumble, almost falling but luckily Jaehyun had been paying close attention and grabbed your wrists to steady you. Without thought, he pulled you down, spinning your body as you got closer until you plonked onto his lap, back facing him. A heavy sigh left your lips as you settled back against him, a pout on both of your lips at Sicheng's ability to be so fucking blind.

"I'm starting to think he's never going to get the hint." Jaehyun's voice rumbled sulkily next to your ear when he chin rested on your shoulder, arms wrapping tight around your waist to keep you as close as possible.

"Maybe we should just fuck." You voiced and he chuckled, chest vibrating against your back.

"I'm already finding it hard enough to not pop a boner from the sight of you alone, don't say those things especially not when your perfect little arse is pressing on my dick."

Ever since you first formally met Jaehyun, the pair of you were close. It started with him simply telling you he knew you liked Sicheng and he was going to help you win his attention and affection. Then somehow you two grew even closer to the point where he was always the one you called when your feelings got too much to handle. Many times you had returned to your dorm to find him already on your bed in a mock-seductive pose surrounded by your favourite snacks and DVDs. And honestly, sometimes, you really wished you had fallen for Jaehyun, he would be such an amazing, loving, attentive boyfriend but no, you had to fall for the clueless innocent one that didn't seem to know a play date from a real date.

"Then let's go back to your room and fuck. The guys wouldn't mind if we skip the club tonight, they'll have fun without us."

"Ugh, don't tempt me, Y/N." He warned with a groan that really did sound like he was fighting with everything in him not to take you up on your offer. "You two are pretty much perfect for each other, he's just too fucking dumb to realise. I'll happily fuck you if you can say 100% you believe that you won't regret it and it won't ruin chances of you two getting together." You only pouted again, knowing you couldn't say that. Something in you knew that if anything happened between you and Jaehyun, Sicheng would never want to date you, he wouldn't want to get involved with a friend's ex-anything even if it was meaningless. Some stupid bro-code or whatever. Sicheng was incredibly loyal and sometimes you hated how much you loved it. "We can keep trying to make him jealous though, I've been looking forward to tonight all week."

"You just love fucking with people." You snorted.

"I do but I also love flirting with you and tonight I get to take it further and grind with you."

"Oh, really?" He hummed and nuzzled your neck making you giggle.

Right then, Sicheng returned back to his usual calm, carefree self but then his eyes landed on your giggling form writhing on Jaehyun's lap as he nipped your skin playfully and his body grew tense, all light in his eyes extinguishing.

"The taxi is here, stop fucking about." He glared at you both then stalked off to the exit to meet the car waiting for the three of you.

"Well shit, he swore." You noted. As a general rule, Sicheng didn't swear. You had only heard him swear a handful of times and never at people, only when he accidentally hurt himself or was incredibly stressed with his school work.

"I think it's finally working," Jaehyun spoke gleefully. You could only smile softly. You wanted Sicheng to finally notice you as girlfriend potential but not if it meant he got hurt first.

"What if it doesn't work?" you mumbled getting up and straightening your dress. Jaehyun scoffed.

"It will trust me, Princess." He mocked the pet name Sicheng had you saved as in his phone. You don't know when he did it, you hadn't been aware until Jaehyun had spotted it one day and teased Sicheng in front of the entire friendship group. It had made you cheek achingly happy to know he had you saved as such an endearing term. He had, of course, rushed to try and explain the name, reminding the group of your love of fairy tales and your wish to live in one yourself. Following that day, he had always been saved as Prince on your phone which made him beam when you showed him to stop him feeling so embarrassed about your own ID in his phone.

***

The night was not going at all how either you or Jaehyun had hoped. From the moment the three of you stepped into the bustling club, Sicheng had rushed off to find your group without even a backwards glance to check you were still there. In a huff, you had grabbed Jaehyun's hand and dragged him straight to the bar. Both of you consumed just enough to have a pleasant buzz running through your veins before making your way onto the dance floor. Your moves were innocent enough for a good few hours even as more people filled the space and your bodies were forced to grow closer as to not lose one another in the crowd.

"Let's just give up." You spoke defeatedly when the pair of you had plopped down at the large booth style table your group had been occupying the whole night. At the moment, the table was empty bar from Yuta sat around the other side with one girl on his lap, another by his side. He was lip-locked with the girl by his side while the girl on his lap working his neck so he didn't notice his friends return.

"Nooo, we can't," Jaehyun whined, picking up the bottle of champagne from the bucket to drink directly from it. Honestly, you couldn't even remember who decided that your group of university students should drink champagne on a night out but looking at the bottle still made you smile in amusement. Plus, it actually tasted really good which surprised you as usually you hated champagne so you didn't complain. "It'll work, trust me."

"You just want to grind on me." You scoffed taking the bottle from his hands to gulp down a generous swig yourself. When Jaehyun didn't respond, you side-eyed him to find him grinning at you in such an over the top perverted way you choked on the liquid with laughter.

"Can you two just fuck already and get it over with?" Yuta sighed dramatically from across the table. You had no idea when he had pulled away from the girls but didn't question it, looking across at him as Jaehyun rubbed your back to calm your breaths while laughing himself as alcohol dribbled down your chin. "Or if you're not going to fuck him, my lap is always available for you, Y/N." He winked with a grin.

"You look like you have your hands full already." You noted when you could talk, motioning to the girls that then sat either side of him, almost glaring at you for taking the attention of the beautiful man away from them.

"They can have my hands, you can have my dick-"

"Alright, enough hyung." Jaehyun sighed, wanting to cut the elder off before he went into graphic detail of his plans for you. "Just go back to your playthings."

"The offer is always on the table...if that's where you want it," Yuta smirked at you one more time before leaning back and turning his head to an intense kiss with the girl on his left that had previously been on his lap.

"He's shameless, he really is." You made a face of disgust. Yuta's behaviour was not at all new, he loved sex and didn't care who knew it. You kind of respected him for not letting anyone deter his passions but you really wished he wouldn't turn his lust to you every time you wore something a little more revealing than jeans and a hoodie.

"Yep but, it works for him." Jaehyun mused, looking at you with a grin at the same time you turned your gaze to him. "Maybe I should act like him, think it'll get me some action, huh?"

"Your face alone can get you action." You replied honestly and he giggled. "You know you could be in the exact same position as Yuta right now if you weren't insistent on being by my side."

"We need to get Princess her Prince." With that, he slid out of the booth and held his hand out to you. "Let's step this up a notch."

"Whatever." You didn't have it in you to argue knowing that at the end of the day, you always had fun with Jaehyun. So you allowed him to pull you up out of your seat and behind him back on the dance floor.

It took no time at all for Jaehyun to change the innocent dancing the pair of you had been doing all night into something a little more intimate. His hands grasped your hips to pull your body close enough that your chests touched. You had to part your legs to allow his own to fit between yours, his thigh almost touching your core but thankfully, he didn't get close enough. If he did, you were certain you'd give up entirely on Sicheng and drag Jaehyun back to your bed.

At some point, you gave up entirely with trying to hold back your movements, afraid of how they'd seem to onlookers and danced without a care, hips rolling and swaying with the music. Soon, you turned around to press you back to his chest, curving your arse out to grind against him shamelessly. Jaehyung didn't complain at all, in fact, he encouraged your movements, hands pulling your hips flush to his and grinding back against you.

Your eyes had been lazily roaming the crowd as your hands lifted behind you to lace together behind Jaehyun's neck, pulling his head next to your own to get closer. Still, he didn't complain but your eyes happened to land on someone that certainly did not look happy.

Sicheng was no more than six metres away, a girl trying to grind up against him but his body was hard as stone, and not in the way she wanted, dark eyes narrowed on you and jaw clenched tight.

"He's looking at us." You spoke, not bothering to lower your voice knowing that only Jaehyun could hear you due to proximity, the bounding bass too loud for anyone further away to make out your words.

"Good." Jaehyun's voice was deep and husky and as it vibrated directly into your ear shivers danced down your body making you shudder. His nose traced the curve of your neck slowly and you tilted your head to the other side, giving him all the space he wanted. All the while, your eyes stayed locked with Sicheng's. He knew you had noticed him but you didn't seem to care. His jaw grew even more defined and he gritted his teeth as tight as possible without breaking them.

Something in you was working harder than your usual bravery that had you slinking one hand down from Jaehyun's neck, trailing your fingers over your own shoulder and down through the valley of your breasts. Even with the distance between you, it was clear that Sicheng's eyes followed the path your hand took. Gaining confidence in the interest you had never seen in him before, you kept lowering your hand down to the hem of your dress, teasing your fingers under the fabric slightly. Sicheng swallowed visibly and licked his lips. Upwards your hand returned until it was over Jaehyun's on your hip. He allowed you to lead it wherever you wanted, which happened to be your thigh. That seemed to snap Sicheng out of his daze and the next thing you knew, he was in front of you. Roughly, he pulled you from Jaehyun's arms, swapping your body with the girl that had been dancing with him, or on him really as he didn't reciprocate.

"Hey!" Jaehyun pretended to argue but you could see the smirk threatening to break his facade. "We were dancing!"

"We're swapping." Sicheng stated firmly, giving Jaehyun a hard look and leaving no room for discussion.

The girl looked as if she was about to argue but then Jaehyun placed his hands on her arms gaining her attention. One look at his handsome features staring down at her and she was putty in his hands.

Sicheng gripped your hand tight and lead you out of the club. He didn't speak or let go even as you complained that you were having fun. Even once he had successfully flagged down a taxi and climbed into the back, holding you close on the seat beside him, he still didn't talk to you. In fact, he only told the driver the campus both of your buildings resided on then fell into tense silent, staring darkly forwards. You gave up then, he wasn't going to say anything until he wanted to, you had learned that about Sicheng very quickly. If he didn't want to talk, he wouldn't.

The drive seemed to take too long, the air in the vehicle growing stuffy and suffocating. As soon as the car stopped you threw open the door and jumped out to suck in all the air your lungs could candle. Sicheng paid the driver before climbing out calmly and starting to walk along the path. After a handful of steps, he realised he couldn't hear yours so he stopped and turned to look at you.

"Come on." He urged but you still stood in the same spot that your feet landed upon exiting the taxi. You crossed your arms stubbornly over your chest showing you had no intention of moving. "Y/N." He sighed impatiently. "It's too cold to stand around outside being stubborn, I'm trying to walk you home."

"I said I didn't want to leave. I was having fun with Jae-"

"Don't!" He hissed, looking at you menacingly and you actually fell silent, jaw dropping slightly at his expression and tone. You had never seen him like that and it kind of scared you. Never in all the time that you had known Sicheng would you thought he could be intimidating but here he was, making your legs feel weak. Admittedly, you suspected it wasn't entirely fear, certain there was at least a slither of excitement sending tremors into your legs lead by arousal. "I saw what you were doing, you don't need to remind me." You could only stare at him with wide, unblinking eyes, waiting for him to say more. "Please, come on." His tone was no longer harsh but pleading and desperate as if he was trying to avoid the conversation you wanted. Still, you said nothing. He stalked over to you and took your hands into his own gently. "Please, let's just get you home, yeah, we can talk in the morning. Let's not do this now."

"You can't drag me away from Jae and expect me to just go along with it, Sicheng."

"I couldn't just stand there and let you practically have sex in the middle of the club, Y/N!"

"What?" You laughed. "I know you're inexperienced with sex, I'm equally as inexperienced but you seriously can't tell me that's what it looked like." His jaw was tight, refusing to open and indulge you but then his eyes widened as he took note of what you said.

"You're as inexperienced as me?" He muttered.

"Yeah, you know this."

"But...Jaehyun..."

"Wait, you think Jae and I have fucked?" He nodded, cheeks flushing when you burst into laughter. "No, Sicheng, we've never done anything at all. He and I only touch in the ways you and I do."

"That's not going to change, is it?" You paused in your response spotting his nervous expression and you replied before you could stop yourself.

"With me and him or with me and you?" Sicheng chewed on his lip and lowered his head to stare at his shoes as he toed the pavement anxiously. "Chengie." You begged. "Please, tell me what you want."

"You, I want you." He didn't lift his head which you were grateful for because you were certain that your dumbfounded expression was not an attractive one. "I've always wanted you, ever since you approached me in the cafe but I knew a girl like you could never want a guy like me so I pretended that I just wanted to be friends with you-"

"Are you serious?" He nodded and glanced at you through his lashes. "We're so fucking stupid."

"What?" His eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he allowed his neck to straighten so his head was once again upright and looking at you, at least mostly upright. Whenever he thought or was confused, Sicheng always tilted his head slightly to the left and it was so unbelievably cute. Even now, still kind of mad that he dragged you away so rudely from the club without even asking if you wanted to leave, you felt your lips starting to curve up seeing the adorable action.

"I thought you didn't like me, that you never would."

"Oh...yeah you are stupid." He mumbled, not at all intending to offend you and honestly, you weren't because he was equally as stupid in this situation.

"And you're just as bad." His confusion returned tenfold. "I approached you because I liked you."

"What?!" He shrieked making you giggle in amusement at his blown eyes and high pitch. "You liked me?!" You nodded. "Do you still like me?" You shook your head and his body slumped. "Oh...okay....that...it's okay... I missed my chance-"

"I love you." He perked back up and looked at you with disbelief smothering his features, hope lurking in the back of his eyes.

"Like...as friends?"

"No as in I'm in love with you, Sicheng." In an instant, he was in front of you and lifting you up into his arms, burying his face into your neck as he twirled happily all while you giggled.

"I love you I love you I love you." He repeated until he stopped and put you back down, both swaying on your feet. You couldn't tell if it was entirely down to the spinning or the confessions sending euphoria buzzing through your bodies and hearts fluttering. "I love you, Y/N. I want to be with you forever. I want to you be my girlfriend now and wife later."

"Is this you asking or stating a fact?"

"Both?" He offered with a cheeky grin.

"Ah well, I can't say no to a promise of forever from my Prince Charming." He beamed and gingerly leant forward until your lips pressed together in a short simple kiss that was still somehow full of love and promises of a wonderful future together.

"So, do you think true loves kiss is real?" He asked almost as soon as his lips no longer touched your own.

"Hmm, I don't know, maybe we should try that again." You giggled and he didn't hesitate to fulfil your wishes.

Once upon a time, a girl and a boy met and were so painfully clueless that they spent months hopelessly pining after one another. Eventually, they reach the end of their ropes and the boy confesses his feelings to the girl. She, of course, confesses her undying love back without hesitation. In return, he promises her a love-fuelled, happy future together and he never once breaks that promise.

Thank you for your request anon! I actually really enjoyed writing this one, both NCT requests I’ve wrote so far have felt new and exciting, kind of like a breath of fresh air at the same time

I really hope you liked it!

Requests are open!

Masterlist

~Chee