#love it when we can impress Louis and his team
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🚁🇦🇷❤️ Steve loved the waving scarves fan project for Out of My System. He tweeted and posted on his IG story about it.
FITFWT Buenos Aires, 18 May 2024 x x
#aww#it is a cool project and I hope we can do it again#love it when we can impress Louis and his team#waving scarves#is there an official name for this activity#also were they all red too#Steve Durham#Louis Tomlinson#Out of My System#fan project#FITFWT Buenos Aires#18 May 2024#Louis vid#mine
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From 2010- Back On Tour
2012
Part 17 
3rd January 2012 Bournemouth
��How are you all doing tonight?” I ask grabbing my water bottle and taking a sip. The crowd all scream “good. Did you all have a good Christmas?” I ask putting my bottle down and one again everyone screams “ok. Now we thought it would be fun to play a game with you. I’m going to ask one of you to hum a tune, the boys are going to each have a buzzer and guess what song your humming. Sound good? Ok. To make this fair I have a bowl full of rows and seat numbers. Ok let’s start” I dip by hand into the bowl and pull out a piece of paper “row L seat 5” a member of our team make their way over to a girl who then hums a tune. Harry quickly presses the buzzer
“Easy, that’s Teenage Dream. YN loves that song”
“One point for Harry. Ok next… row A seat 9” again the member of our team takes a microphone to another girl who hums. This time Louis presses the buzzer
“She makes me wanna?” the girl shake her head and hums again Liam buzzes
“Yeahx3?” again the girl shakes her head
“We give up” Harry says
“It was Give Me Everything”
4th January 2012 Birmingham
“Hello Birmingham!” Harry says smiling “YN how does it feel to perform here?”
“Crazy. I saw my first ever concert here so it feels very surreal”
“YNs family are all here and once again cookie is sleeping in her dressing room” Louis says when the whole arena start saying ‘aww’ I turn around and see a photo of cookie asleep on the sofa “isn’t she sweet?”
“She’s an angel”
“We’ve got some tweets we want to go through with you. Ok first one is ‘what did you get for Christmas? YN did you get another dog?”
“No” I pout, “but I did get a painting of cookie. Zayn what did you get”
“Hulk boxers”
“And he’s wearing them tight now aren’t you!” Louis laughs
“Ok next question ‘did you get each other presents?’” Harry asks
“I am their present” Liam jokes and I roll my eyes
“Will cookie come with you for the whole of tour?” Zayn asks
“No she’s going to go stay with my best friend Emma so that my dad can fly out to us more”
“Who is messiest?”
“Harry” we all say and point at him. He holds both his hands up in the air in defence
“YNs no better. Have you seen her makeup area on the bus?” I again roll my eyes.
5th January 2012 Plymouth
During What Makes You Beautiful I have to run across the stage. Every night so far has go ok expect tonight. Earlier on in the night I spilt my water on stage and unfortunately I go flying landing on my butt making the boys all look at me. Harry and Louis look at one another then nod running towards me then ‘falling’ on the floor while Zayn and Liam laugh
“I’ve lost where we even are in the song” I say as Zayn helps me up. The fans then help us get back on track.
7th January 2012 Nottingham
During the Twitter segment someone asks if we can show everyone how to do the Macarena. I stand in between Zayn and Louis and we all do the Macarena while the fans sing for us. I turn to face Zayn and we both burst out laughing at one another
“Ok next question. Do an impression of each other” Louis says. Niall does his impression of Louis
“Alright lads and lass ayup I’m from Yorkshire Doncaster ya might know it I just like chillin” Zayn does an impression of Louis
“Err it’s me Zayn. Listen I don’t like dancing, but I do like singing” Liam does an impression of Niall. I do one of Liam and Harry does an impression of me
“Hi I’m YN” he says high pitched making me laugh “I sing really high and I can’t sleep unless I’ve hand a cup of tea and 2 biscuits. I also love my dog more than my bandmates”
“Not wrong” I joke making them all look offended “but Harry we can’t forget about you” I clear my throat “ m’Harry Styles and I annoy my housemates when I bring girls home” the truth is he doesn’t, or at least not like that. For some reason the label want him to basically be a womaniser, but that’s really not him. He’s the shy boy who actually gets nervous talking to girls. It’s actually really cute.
8th January 2012 Brighton
For the whole show so far I haven’t been able to hear myself once which means I’ve been off pitch the whole time
“I wanna dance with somebody feel the heat with somebody. Yeah dance with somebody, with somebody who loves me” I sing and sigh looking over at Niall who gives me a little smile. I walk back and look to the people who are stood in the side wings while the boys carry on singing. I point to my ears and shout at them that I can’t hear anything. Before we sing moments I decide to take my in ears out
“YN’s gonna be deaf by the end of the night” Liam sings
“I can’t bloody hear anything. I’ve been off pitch all night. I think my in ears are broke”
“How have you broken them?” Louis asks
“She throws them on the floor as soon as she gets in her dressing room” Alex shouts from side stage
“Alex just said that you throw them on the floor is that right?” Zayn points his mic to me as if this is an interview
“No… maybe ok moving on this next song is Moments”
11th January 2012 London
Back in London and for some weird reason the fans have took to throwing things on stage. Mainly bras and pants.
I’m stood next to Harry as we sing I Wish when a bottle comes flying at us. Harry places his hand in front of my face and bats the bottle away
“Guys let’s not throw full bottles at us” he says during the song
“Thanks” I reply and Harry smiles down at me. At the end of the song Harry takes his in ear out
“You ok?” he asks. I take mine out and reply
“Yeah I’m fine” while we’re stood talking Louis goes on to talk about how that could have really hurt one of us if it had hit us and that it’s a hazard to throw things on the stage incase we fall.

#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x you#harry styles x reader#harry styles x oc#harry styles fanfic rec#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles#6th one direction member#one direction x reader#one direction#sixth one direction member
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[Translated from Spanish]
Louis Tomlinson makes history in Mexico: this was his biggest solo concert
The British singer ended up sealing an unbreakable pact with his Mexican fans, in a historic show that impressed the whole world
by Luis Angel H Mora
Photo by marianaghoto
Last night, one of the most historic concerts recorded in Mexico City was held. Usually, it is said that fans surrender to their artist, but this time the dynamic turned out to be different: Louis Tomlinson surrendered to his Mexican fans.
The British singer who began his career in a British reality show, with the only dream of becoming an artist, gave the biggest show of his career in Mexico. There were approximately 70,000 attendees who gathered at the Autódromo Hermanos Rodríguez to consecrate Tomlinson as a soloist and to make it clear that Mexican fans are the best in the world.
Louis Tomlinson began his steps as part of the One Direction group, that boyband that left us for almost a decade, breaking the hearts of millions. Its members did not cease in their search for stardom and artistic expression. The aforementioned singer became a soloist, managing to win over his well-known followers, and many others.
Photo by Joshua Halling
Tomlinson has a special and important connection with Mexico. He has visited our country on several occasions, being part of something that we can call "The Mexican Dream". Louis has lived every possible Mexican experience: from taking a Tecate Light in a can, traveling in "combi" to transport himself from one place to another, or to stepping on the Mexa ground in the middle of the Dry Law and election season.
For Mexican Louises, the artist could well be their president. They constantly show an unconditional love for the native of Doncaster in the United Kingdom. From that time when he chose our country as part of his exclusive tour to present his documentary (there were only three nations), until when he first appeared at the Pepsi Center WTC in the capital with three dates declared sold out. A pact was sealed between Louis and the Mexicans.
The pact was sealed between Louis and the Mexicans
Photo by @marianagphoto
Now, Louis Tomlinson chose Mexico City to perform the biggest concert of his career, but not only that, but he also chose it as the indicated show to be filmed by an impressive production team, which would broadcast it live to all corners of the world.
After that livestreaming event was announced, all the eyes of the world were on Mexico and Mexican fans behaved to the height. Able to have an understanding and an overwhelming union on social networks, they also demonstrated this ability by being together in the same place.
The "Kill My Mind" moment was a proof of this. It was on that occasion that the fans showed an absolute synchronization with the culture of Louis Tomlinson. The lights of the cell phones of all the attendees shone up and down to the rhythm of the song. Although this practice was born in Chile and was transported to other countries, it was in Mexico that it reached its peak and its absolute resolution.
Photo: Veeps
Likewise, the Mexicans did not disappoint by singing loudly, clearly, and without forgetting the lyrics, the moment: "For every question why, you were my because" from the song "Walls". And that phrase gave the title to the worldwide broadcast event that took this concert to homes around the world.
On the other hand, Mexican fans organized to paint the sea of people with the colors of the flag of Mexico. Something that was achieved perfectly during the song "She Is Beauty We Are World Class". A sublime moment that managed to excite the singer: "That shit with the lights was fucking incredible, thank you for that, I will never, ever forget it, thank you."
The emotion of the British singer was totally noticeable. With his voice choppy, he confessed that he was nervous about this presentation, not only because it was something important in his career, but because for days he had been a little "croaky" in his throat.
Photo: Josh Halling
However, Louis Tomlinson gave everything on stage, singing his hymns as a soloist, such as "Holding On A Heartache", "Out of My System", "Night Changes" - a song by One Direction -, or "Bigger Than Me".
"You are something out of this world. I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground. Seriously, after all this. Thank you. I wish I had more words— well, I do, but right now I just want to keep singing before I burst into tears. Thank you, thank you, thank you, I love you," Tomlinson said.
Photo: Joshua Halling
In the end, Louis Tomlinson closed his concert of just over an hour and a half with "Silver Tongues" in the middle of fireworks and a rain of eye-catching papers that many fans desperately took to take home.
This concert left several unforgettable memories. 70,000 people in one place, all of them unconditional fans of the artist. A show that was broadcast live to everyone, the consecration of a fandom that conquered the media and social networks of many countries, but above all the confession of Louis Tomlinson in which he said that he will dream forever of tonight:
"I don't want this show to end. I'm giving it my all today. And I want to tell you that I'm going to dream about tonight, I'll never forget it. Thank you very, very much."
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IWTV S2 Ep3 Musings - Loumand
Last post, I promise; I needed another nap; this ep's a freaking rollercoaster. And these two queens nearly gave me a stress ulcer!
DEBATABLE, Louis. I can think of FAR worse vamps than you, love.
Why're y'all having this whole conversation where anyone can hear?
They got Sartre's wall-eyes down; good makeup this season, team! 👌
DreamStat's a Loumand bed-death truther, jfc. 😭
I wanna know EXACTLY what Armand sees--or "feels"--whenever DreamStat pops up in Lou's head. Cuz he clearly knows precisely where Les is; he looks right in his direction. But does he HEAR Les too? (God I hope not, this song would've had me SEETHING--Back to Hell with you! 😅)
"Oh dear" indeed; I was HOLLERING.
SAM WAS DEVOURING THIS SCENE HOLY GOD GO AWAY DEMON
Armand looked PISSED, I was scared for Louis' life! And he DOES know, actually, yes Lou. I can almost GUARANTEE that he knows PRECISELY where Lestat is AT THIS VERY MOMENT, yes Lou.
If only you knew.... 😬
Claudia's suffered more than Christ. And nice cut to Daniel sneaking around with Raglan James as Armand talks about Furies punishing "human wrongdoing." It's really interesting that Armand told the lawyer that LOUIS is the owner of the paintings. Is he the owner of the penthouse too? HOW MANY DEEDS DOES HE HAVE, ROLIN?
I wonder what AMC might be saying about Loumand's art collection, not just wrt what we know about art heist!Armand (which we'll likely see a nod to in Ep4 at the Louvre); but also wrt what we know about Dubai's godawful neocapitalist hellscape economy, and Loumand's "moralizing" about Parisian black markets in S01E02.
I wonder if that's the excuse Armand'll give the coven when Louis shows up for dinner in Ep4--very much NOT dead; and rips out Santiago's tongue.
WILD voice-over, cuz you KNOW that's what Santiago was thinking, too, LOL. (You wish, Francis.) But yes: Louis' finna end your whole career. XD
Another TERRIFYING jumpscare from the coven, like in Ep2 with Annika. Louis, I am shocked & appalled--can you not HEAR all these vamps planning your bloody murder around you? CLAUDIA! WTF!?
But this is how you know Armand's true personality--he hates getting his hands dirty. He kills all the time, but he makes his victims' deaths pretty. He'd rather sit back & let Lestat/Louis come in and wreck his whole coven, even though he has the power to just light those mofos up all on his own! I wish AMC emphasized a bit more that Armand not only writes/directs the plays--he's an ACTOR, too. And istg he's an expert at PRETENDING to be helpless, meanwhile he's the strongest vamp that's NOT one of the Children of the Millennia (thanks to how well Marius made him).
Armand, that is LOW; waiting until Claudia's stuck under the oaths b4 you tell her she's guilty of breaking Great Laws she doesn't even know about yet. WTF?
How TF you gon' hold Louis accountable for following the Laws when he wasn't even allowed to be in the effing room when they were read!? He's not even a member! WTF! (I get it--any rogue vampires are subject to death, yadayada; we know it's a stupid policy.)
I love how he plans to leave by himself here--it had nothing to do with picking "another one" over Claudia. He just didn't want to hold her back anymore. And his presence was causing problems. 😭 It's so cute that Louis' stipulation about London was that if it's "too large" he'd leave and go to Ireland (?!?)--he's become agoraphobic or something? He just wants to be alone in his hermit hole--MOOD. 😭
Good to get confirmation that the Fire Gift here is Armand and blessedly NOT Santiago--so why's he zooming around in the sewers?
Look, sometimes folks make terrible first impressions--Lestat was being hella racist, Louis' always playing defense, Armand was finna kill Louis in a gay public park. It happens.
Foreshadowing like crazy, as usual.
WILD thing to say. I'm gonna cry, please stop.
(What kinda hypocrisy is that, when you were made young your dang self!?) She's already 30+ years old--maybe she'll last a little longer if y'all (read: sexist, racist, ageist, ableist, etc society) don't eff around tryna make her life even harder! But AMC's deliberately cutting Claudia's life in half, compared to the books, cuz misogynoir's real and Claudia gets NOTHING out of vampirism, not even a fair chance. And y'all let her into the coven KNOWING how much she loves y'all, and KNOWING y'all were gonna kill her. EFF THIS WHOLE COVEN, ARMAND INCLUDED. (Lemme calm down--this kind of betrayal is exactly how Lestat must've felt in S01E07; I get it; they're getting a taste of their own medicine. But LESTAT EFFING HAD IT COMING. The coven should've just told them: y'all got til sunrise to GTFO our territory, you're not welcome here. This whole bit's unnecessary.)
THE PARALLELS ARE PARALLELING
SKILL ISSUE. Cuz Louis' got the least power, and he's finna clear that whole bish out in just a couple episodes. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Louis, love, ARMAND DON'T GIVE A EFF ABOUT RAISING SOME OTHER MAN'S OFFSPRING. This is the call of the wild, as Alphas KILL the children their stolen Omega brides had for other Alphas/Betas, so he can restart the gene pool with HIS DNA instead. I know y'all had National Geographic back then already--READ A BOOK, Louis, it's what you're best at.
Incredible. After all of that Louis said Lestat never broke him. BENT BUT NEVER BROKEN, that's right! 💪😤
Boy, we're not talking about some little (unrequited) CRUSH over a man you only knew for a few months (which you've CLEARLY not gotten over yet). Louis was MARRIED to the man for 30 YEARS. This is his MAKER. Lestat knew his whole family; went to the Black cookouts and everything! They literally built a home AND business together! They raised a child together! WHATCHU KNOW ABOUT THAT!?
And that's LESTAT'S DAUGHTER TOO--how much can you possibly love EITHER of them while planning to knock her off!? I can't listen to too much more of this. *hands Louis the torch and scythe*
Beautiful end of this STACKED episode. Incredible work, AMC! Jacob acted his PANTS off; he excels at the trembling voice, agonized facial expressions, and utter mental breakdowns. He's pulling DEEP within him, holy god; it's so raw, it's almost hard to watch. EMMY WHEN?!
#interview with the vampire#loumand#the vampire armand#iwtv tvc metas#must see tv#the hype is real#the feels#THE FEELS I TELL YOU
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Only Boo Ep 9 Stray Thoughts
Last week, we finished out the high school section of the series. All of our boys qualified for college, and our aspiring idols passed their second audition even if it seems like Jang is primarily interested in Payos. Payos expressed his feelings to Potae, and Moo finally had his first kiss with Kang. I’m excited to see what life after high school looks like for these boys.
Wow, we just started and I am reminded of how much I love Moo. I will have notes for this show, but I want to reiterate that I like the way this team writes gays who know themselves and aren’t shy about it.
Also, I’m very glad that Moo found someone who’s good at time management and planning details.
EP 9: Blank Letter
Oof, this is a #LipWatch2024 episode. Everyone needs to hydrate.
Aun’s torso doesn’t soften the blow of Potae not handling this confession well.
Why is he not taking that $500 bike he bought with him??
Suddenly, Shone.
So, the whole competing cousins thing is over because they talked it out? I guess!?! Sure.
I do love that Moo’s mom never taught him shame. Her stern warnings about keeping up his grades is also pragmatic.
Now, Kang, you are boyfriends who are living together. What made you nervous there? Ya’ll we at “take our time” kissing.
Alright, I’ll take negotiating intimacy and different sexual velocities.
Man, this show continues to walk a line somewhat unsuccessfully. I want this idol dating plotline to be handled well.
Sleeping on the couch when they have a king size bed? Kang, I am trying to be with you bro, but you are making this difficult.
I see what they did there with finding a comfortable position.
It’s always fun and games when you’re trying to Netflix and Chill until you find yourself engrossed by The Red Violin (1998) and now you can’t stop thinking about that film.
If they named the episode after this storytelling device, and fail to use it in this episode, I will be disappointed.
Moo flirts relentlessly, and I love him.
Potae about to learn a harsh lesson about asking your friend not to change when the way he’s always treated you has been grounded in how much he loves and desires you.
Damn, Moo let everyone know he’s seeing a dude as his first impression.
I can’t believe they have Louis out here ruining gays again.
Multiple people bodied Kang to be responsible for Moo. I hate that.
I’m not surprised Potae needs improvement, but what I’m hoping for is his ability to grow from the feedback.
I also like this boy beefing with them. I am curious if he also succeeds and they’re all forced to work together in a group.
Jang only glanced at Payos once this week, and didn’t insinuate anything about putting them in housing for the duration of their camp.
You can’t fall in love if you ain’t clumsy!
Not Moo pulling out the Seme Juice!
It’s really fascinating watching this show not want to put this show in a real gay context. Having the older characters talk around it as if they don’t want to inflict homophobia on Moo leads to some difficult conversations.
I don’t like Moo responding to the push to be discreet by blasting his boyfriend in front of all of his followers without consulting him. They’d just spoken about this. That’s not great. I really do get it, but hoo boy.
I am not interested in Potae jealousy next week.
Feeling a bit mild about the blank letter introduction and name of the episode only for it to be probably a seed for episode 11 breakup drama. I am trying to stick with this show’s goal to explicitly avoid mentioning the queer reality around its characters, especially Moo. I can see the desire to create a world around him where his queerness isn’t a problem he has to manage, but it’s also creating a painful dissonance for me.
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Hi Marte. So I'm probably completely wrong here but I'm just theorizing. Harry and Louis have talked about wanting kids since they were young and Harry mentioned it again in HH promo. If they had plans to eventually CO and start a family then would they get involved with beards who stipulate in a contract that they can't CO? Would they agree to that? Harry would be digging himself into a hole by adding more and more beards and making it increasingly harder for himself. There is probably something in the contract to say that either party can't CO until 5 or 10 years after the relationship ends, or that they have to keep up with the pretense that the relationship was real. But I can't imagine Harry would agree to a contract knowing he could never CO. So there are 2 options here. That they plan on never CO or they agree to a contract knowing that they will be able to CO at some point. The only thing is that I wonder if they were to CO if there were some grounds that the other party could sue them for damage to their image but maybe they can come up with a way that does minimum damage. In Leo and Bradley's case with Gigi, I don't get the impression that Leo and Bradley want to CO so it might not matter so much to them. But I can't imagine Harry and Louis wanting to be closeted forever. If that was the case then wouldn't they shut down any speculation about their sexuality? It would be so easily to do a written interview or in depth IG post talking about how harmful the speculation has been, or they even could get fake married. On the other hand, speculation about their sexuality is good publicity for them. But I'm not sure they would welcome the speculation if they planned on never CO. Wouldn't that be like queerbaiting? What do you think?
Hi, anon!
I don't think kids are a priority for them right now. They're a celebrity gay couple, kids will basically mean the end of both their careers. I don't see either of them wanting to be the primary care taker while the other one's on tour. That wouldn't be fair either. So they will both have to be there and be present for their kids. I think they'd both want that too, in 7-10 years or so.
I don't think H or L would go into a contract willingly with a beard, stipulating that they can't come out. But all this started in 1D when they were young and impressionable, and i'm not sure if they knew the consequences of what they were forced/pressured/convinced into by Sony. Bar TS or Kendall maybe, i think H's team has been the one in power and written the contract stipulations. I don't think H would have put himself in a situation where it would be neccessary to agree to such a term. So i don't think that's what's stopping him from coming out. Bg is a bigger hindrance for them.
I agree if they never plan to come out all the queercoding, fights with management and bargaining they've done have been pretty pointless. It doesn’t make sense as a theory based on all we've observed over the years. I'm pretty sure they both would come out this second if they could. H and L have always given attention to and praised people who have come out. Like L with the rainbow apple t-shirt for tim cook and H with the michael sam football shirt. They so badly wish it was them having that opportunity.
If they never plan to come out, because they can't or because they don't want to, we would have seen a totally different behaviour from them. What on earth is the point of singing i love him i hate it if you don’t want the world to know you're gay and in a relationship, because you'll never be out? It's not queerbaiting, it's queercoding and wanting people to see beyond the stunts and lies, and see the truth. Speculation about their sexuality isn't good publicity if you have to go on twitter and shut it down, making yourself look like a right douche and a homophobe by doing it. It's harmed Louis' image and popluarity immensely, both among fans, the gp and journalists.
Since they want out, there must be a way out. Louis wouldn't be all faith in the future if there never was a way out for them. Harry wouldn't be jumping from stunt to stunt if he's in this for life. He'd find a more permanent solution. If there weren't a way out they would have given up the fight long ago. They're still fighting.
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When I read that SHADE's twitter bio said "your new favorite band", it was a 'meh' for me. When I saw the way Oliver talked to the person in the DMs, it turned into a clear 'no' which was underlined when he basically said "We're sorry but we were sabotaged and also just so you know, Louis is behind us" in his non-apology. You can have great success being introduced to the fanbase - I LOVE Only The Poets for example - but if your behavior as a human sucks, not even being "hand-picked" by Louis will help you.
There’s a part in me that can absolutely see the human side of it all. It was only one member of a band so why punish them all, and it was a dick-move, yes, but that doesn’t mean they’re bad people.
Yet I wished the reaction would’ve been more humble, more like “we apologized to Louis” and not pushing back the way they did, telling the world they would ask Louis for advice and then coming back with an apology that states “we were sabotaged and Louis thinks so too”.
It gives me the impression they a) lied to Louis about the dms, b) have only talked to some of Louis’ team, c) did not receive any advice, and d) assumed Louis wasn’t mad at them because he probably acted totally normal towards them backstage, which e) turned into Louis must have their back. 😆
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Essential Avengers: Avengers West Coast #63: "When Lives the LIGHTNING"
October, 1990
The original HUMAN TORCH vs the LIVING LIGHTNING!
Living Lightning? Comic fans in 1990 probably were thinking 'who?' but fans of specifically 60s Hulk comics were like whaaaaaat?
I know this guy from the future. He sharked the Grandmaster at poker. He was revealed to be gay in an off-hand joke about how the Great Lakes Avengers have the same initials as the Gay/Lesbian Alliance. Fun guy.
And this is his debut, woo!
Not sure why he's gotta bully poor Jim Hammond when life already does that enough, shrug.
Last times: there was this whole thing with Immortus manipulating Wanda to turn her into a conduit for the Proper Timeline to flow through, or something. For some reason, this involved turning her into a racist. But then Wanda maximoffed Immortus so hard that his bosses came down and gave him a promotion to inanimate object.
Also, Terminus and Terminus bouncing baby boy Terminus combined into a bigger Terminus in San Francisco, then went to St Louis, and then went into space and imploded into a black hole. The West Coast team was around for that too.
IT HAS BEEN A BUSY WEEK.
See, Wanda is only now getting check up after everything she went through. That's how busy it's been.
"When lives the lightning" is such an odd way to phrase something. Is that a complete sentence?
The Avengers are going to arrange a nurse so Wanda can recover at home. Money is no object. Janet van Dyne and Iron Man are both in the room and they love throwing money at friends.
But for now, doctor's orders are for everyone to give Wanda some space to rest and everyone filters out. Except Wonder Man, who lingers.
There's weird romance subplot baggage between them. Which got even weirder when she was briefly evil because she taunted him about it.
But now that she's not evil, they have an awkward conversation.
Scarlet Witch: "Simon... wait... please... I... I guess we showed Immortus where he could get off, didn't we?" Wonder Man: "You showed him, Wanda... when you threw off all that excess power he'd secretly bred in you. The rest of us were mostly just along for the ride." Scarlet Witch: "Sometimes, Simon Williams, you can be so silly. Well... good night." Wonder Man: "Good night."
Please don't use the word bred in context of Wanda and Immortus, Simon.
Also, gosh I really can't get behind this awkward romance subplot. I'm too salty about how the marriage Wanda was already in was hit in the knees with a crowbar because John Byrne didn't like it.
Even given Wanda has been through a lot, I think it would take her a long time before she'd want to date again considering her husband dumped her and moved to the other cost while she was having an emotional breakdown.
Anyway. Well away from Wanda's room, Quicksilver asks if Wanda will get her powers back when she's rested from her ordeal.
The doctor answers that he can't say because he's no authority. Unfortunately, he says it in a way that notoriously prickly Quicksilver takes as mutantphobia.
Quicksilver: "I hesitated to ask this in front of my sister, doctor, but... Will her so-called hex power return, when she is stronger?" Dr Sanford: "I'm afraid I really couldn't say, Mr. Maximoff. Before tonight, I never before treated a -- well, you know -- a mutant." Quicksilver: "You speak the word 'mutant' -- as it it were something unclean! By all that is holy, I will--"
And then Hawkeye slides in and tells Quicksilver to calm his tits. For his own sake and for Wanda's try to not to be so touchy. Quicksilver apologizes and runs off.
Wasp is impressed that Hawkeye is acting the peacekeeper instead of the hothead but, geez. We've had this character beat from him already. At least before Byrne reset his character. When Wonder Man was chafing at the demands of being an Avenger and the glitzy life of starring in a Not-Conan movie, he started giving Hawkeye a lot of grief and Hawkeye realized 'wow, this is what I put Cap through, back in the day.'
Anyway, Wasp also remembers that the Tigra subplot has just been dangling like mad for so long. They need to do a Tigra hunt, find teeny tiny six inch tall feral Tigra somewhere in the compound grounds.
It's amazing how much stuff Byrne set up and then did nothing with but now has to be addressed.
Iron Man can't help with the Tigra Hunt right now because he's been blowing off corporate work to help with various Immortus and Terminus-related things. And Hawkeye is meeting estranged wife Mockingbird in Hollywood.
In the only bit of 'huh I wonder if Iron Man is Tony Stark' wheel spinning from the Avengers, Hawkeye cheekily tells Iron Man not to let Tony Stark yell at him too much for skipping work because "we all know what a hard case he can be" to which Iron Man Who Is Definitely Tony Stark can just awkwardly agree.
That was mean and funny, Clint Barton.
So how about this Living Lightning thing?
Well, a guy follows a map that was in his dead father's possessions out to the Santa Ana Mountains and finds the hidden and abandoned lair of the Legion of the Living Lightning.
image
Miguel Santos has a probably biased view on what went down and who the Legion of the Living Lightning were, because his dad was a member and Miguel heard from a surviving legionnaire what happened.
They were a group that tried to take over the US "for its own good."
Miguel Santos: "The Lightning Lord would've saved America from people who didn't love it as much as my father, who'd come here from Mexico -- if not for that green-skinned monster."
Miguel wants to revive the Legion's dream of abolishing war and hatred by taking over the country and so he tries to reactivate the Legion's lightning machine and gets electrocuted.
Whoopsiedoodle.
Back at the Avengers side of the plot, US Agent makes an earnest if awkward attempt to bond with the team.
He suggests to Wonder Man that they play a quick game of pool before starting the Tigra Hunt. But Wonder Man is preoccupied with his own thoughts and turns down the offer to go make a phone call.
US Agent: "The story of my life as an Avenger, West Coast variety. They resent the way Uncle Sam forced me down their throats. Maybe I should've tried to make myself easier to swallow. Well, maybe it's not too late, right? Pym and his ex-wife, over there talking to that witch-dame, Agatha Harkness... they haven't cold-shouldered me the way that bone-headed bowman did... The way even Wonder Man did just now."
US Agent: "Maybe I should just walk right up to them... Tell them how proud I am to be an Avenger... But, hey -- what am I doing kissing up to them? The government appointed me an Avenger, and that's good enough for Jack Daniels, a.k.a. U.S. Agent. Who do these bozos think they are, anyway, looking down their noses at me? Frag' em!"
I want to point out that US Agent was so offended about the thought that maybe his off-putting personality was why he doesn't have any friends, that he forgot his name is John Walker, not Jack Daniels. Dingus.
Also, he was so close to an epiphany and then pride got in the way. There's a lot of reasons why John Jack Daniels Walker could never be a good Captain America and that there is one reason.
Anyway, Hank has no idea why US Agent walked up to them and then shook his fist and walked away. So he just continues his conversation with Agatha Harkness and invites her to move in. It'd be good for Wanda to have her around, since she sees Agatha as family.
A feeling which is mutual, so Agatha decides to stay until Wanda is recovered.
She also offers to have her terrifyingly cute horrible monster cat familiar Ebony help with the Tigra Hunt.
Hank and Wasp are grateful for the help but decide to go check on the robot Human Torch before starting the Tigra Hunt.
(Aw, man, they're never going to get to the fireworks factory...)
Human Torch was revived from the Immortus stuff in the West Coast Avengers Annual but maybe people didn't see that. So Hank explains for the sake of the audience that Jim Hammond had to go into downtime to replenish his energy after the fight against Terminus and also Terminus.
As Hank and Jan wander through the halls of the Avengers Mansion, the West Coast One, they also wonder if Human Torch (robot) will ever adjust to being an Avenger and also in the present.
Hank thinks so but it took even Cap a while to adjust.
Then the two happen to amble past the room where Wonder Man is making his call. To Vision.
Wonder Man quickly recaps everything that's happened with 'we got her out of Magneto's and then Immortus' clutches, long story' and then asks if Vision can come visit. Because Wanda has been through hell and lost her powers. She could use some cheering up.
Vision repeats the same ol' emotionless robot bit. Since the memories up to Byrne's run were deleted, he doesn't consider himself the same synthezoid that married Wanda. Therefore, they are not. And Vision has decided that ghosting her, going completely no contact, is the best approach.
Geez, white Vision. I don't know how much I can call you a dick because you're operating on very limited information, you're basically a baby in terms of having less than a year's worth of memories, and you haven't relearned social nuance yet. But dick move!
Wonder Man says he understands but then he crushes the phone receiver, smashes through the window, and flies off into the night.
Wonder Man: "Oh, I understand, all right... You better believe I do! I'm in love with a woman who loves a husband who's dead to her, and always will be! So how do I fight -- a ghost?"
Completely unnecessary to smash the window like that. Some of your big Hollywood bucks better find their way into the repair fund.
But, like, I get it. I don't like it. I don't like this romance plot and it was been initially written in a way that makes Wonder Man look like an ass before course correction happened.
He loves Wanda. But he's (now) not a jerk that's going to make a move when she's messed up emotionally from her husband dying and then ditching. Simon wants Vision to come visit Wanda so they get back together and there's no possibility for him to agonize over or so they don't get back together and Wanda has closure and can date again. But as it is, all three of them are stuck in a terrible romantic limbo.
That's dramatic.
But I don't have to like it.
Also, even if Vision came and he and Wanda had a talk that gave her closure on their relationship, I think she'd still not be in the headspace to date for a while.
Meanwhile, back in the Santa Ana Mountains, Miguel Santos did not get electrocuted to death. It hurt like hell but he lives.
As often happens in comic books, instead of dying from something that should definitely have killed him, he gained superpowers.
Miguel realizes that he's glowing with an awesome power. When he tried to fix the lightning machine, instead of fixing the superweapon, he has become one.
Miguel Santos: "That felt great -- Maravilloso! If the Legion'd had a few vatos like me, instead of having to use missiles and -- the machine! It could've been anybody who got charged up like this -- even somebody who hated everything the Legion -- and my father -- stood for! Well -- not any more!" -blows up the machine- "I can see now -- it's better this way. From this night on -- there's only one Living Lightning -- and its name is Miguel Santos!"
Usually, these freak empowering accidents are one in a million flukes that can't be replicated to mass produce superpowers. And it was probably the case here too. But he wasn't taking the chance.
Anyway, back at the West Coast Avengers Mansion, Hank and Wasp reach his lab and finds that the place is trashed. The robot Human Torch's resting tube is all melted and there's a hole melted in the roof. And Ann Raymond, who is still here for some reason, is staring in a daze and a little charred.
She was watching the Human Torch as he, well, not slept but was dormant. She wanted to ask more questions about her dead husband Toro who is definitely dead when Jim Hammond woke up/booted up, but when he did, he got this weird look and suddenly flamed on bright enough that it temporarily blinded Ann.
Judging by a melted clock (Hank Pym: "Hello, Dali!"), they can estimate robot Human Torch Jim Hammond flew off hours ago. Probably very confused.
But thankfully, Hank Pym has Rover, the flying vehicle who loves Hank.
He never gets tired of showing it off and I'm always glad when he gets the chance.
We love Rover here.
Meanwhile, robot Human Torch flies off Orange County and muses about how much time has passed since the 50s. His robot brain may as well be trapped in a logic loop because all he really does in these Avengers West Coast comics is fly over stuff and muse about how much time has passed.
Writers really have no idea what to do with him.
Anyway, Jim worries that the world has passed him by. Is there a place in a world that already has a more popular Human Torch blazing around as part of the Fantastic Four?
Maybe. The one thing Jim is sure of is that he's lost. Whoops.
He stops by a donut shop to ask for directions (because he used to be a cop, you see. He even lampshades it) but gets distracted once again musing about how he doesn't fit into society, even back in the 40s and 50s.
I guess all of Vision's robo-angst has concentrated on just Jim Hammond now that Vision lacks the emotional depth to worry about existential things.
Jim happens to overhear a news report about a flying, glowing man causing fires and electrical damage over at Fullerton and goes 'this looks like a job for me, the robot Human Torch!'
Also, Jim doesn't know how to get to Fullerton. He just flies off and figures he'll figure it out.
Over in Rover, Hank, Jan, and Ann Raymond hear the same news report. Even though Ann affirms that Jim wouldn't be causing such a ruckus, the superheroes go to investigate anyway.
Which you'd hope that they would! So I'm glad that they do!
Robot Human Torch lucks out and spots a black-out while flying around and figures that's gotta be Fullerton and goes to investigate a bright glow in the middle of the blacked out area. Which happens to be a gas station fire.
A bunch of panicking civilians assume that Human Torch is whoever did this, back to cause more trouble. And they don't listen when he tells them he's a different guy.
He puts out the fire by absorbing the fire, as Human Torches are known to do, and then looks for anybody who can explain to him what's going on.
Nobody is willing to have a conversation with him but luckily, what's going on shows up to explain himself.
The Living Lightning throws some ball lightning at Human Torch, then claims he was just testing his powers. Jim goes huh ok, well, we have a lot in common, actually... but Living Lightning starts ranting that Human Torch won't stop him, like how the Hulk stopped the Legion!
Which confuses Human Torch more because he has zero context for any of this. He didn't see the subplot where the guy got powers or recapped that old Hulk story.
So Jim starts throwing fireballs back at Living Lightning. Only for his great balls of fire to bounce off an electrical field around Lightning.
When Lightning retaliates with ball lightning, he misses Jim but the electricity hits the road, blinds a driver, and causes them to drive into a tree.
Human Torch: "Good thing seat belts have caught on, the past few decades!"
But Living Lightning declares that next he wants to try his powers out on a living person and targets the teens from the car.
Human Torch intercepts the attack, seemingly with his crotch, falling right into Living Lightning's trap. He didn't care about the teens, he just wanted a free shot at the Human Torch.
The teens try to run to Hammond's aid but he tells them to clear out of the area so they run away.
Living Lightning is going to finish off Hammond when Rover, our beloved flying ant-brained airship, swoops between Lightning and the Torch.
Hank Pym: "Well, ladies, that solves the mystery of the 'flying, glowing man'! Looks like the Torch dropped by to investigate, too." Wasp: "And nearly got his head handed to him for his trouble!"
You don't have to be mean, Jan.
She flies out of Rover to check on Hammond, who is feeling equally dismissive of his performance, to be fair.
Wasp: "You all right?" Human Torch: "Oh, sure. I'm just great. My first solo outing since the Eisenhower administration -- and I wind up flat on my backside!"
Meanwhile, Hank is trying various things. Like. Acid spray. He just goes right to acid spray. He sprays acid at a man he doesn't know whether or not can survive acid.
He can. He even thanks Hank for confirming that for him since Living Lightning is still in the trying things out phase.
Wasp tries to talk the Torch into getting back into the fight but he's decided he's a no-good has-been. Until Living Lightning zaps Rover, sending it into a crash.
So alarmed that Mrs Raymond has been put in harm's way, Hammond FLAMEs ON and starts throwing fireballs at Living Lightning.
Hank comes up with a Plan and throws Torch a metal cable. Which he misses catching. But Wasp catches it and flies it up to him.
Teamwork. Makes the dream work.
Human Torch throws the cable to Living Lightning, who catches it without really thinking about it. But that was a grounding wire and it slurps Living Lightning into Rover's battery. Also, Rover blows up because the electrical charge sets off the fuel tanks.
;_;_\
Farewell, you beautiful ant-craft.
Also, bye, Living Lightning. You'll be back and at some point you'll mellow out. I mean, Hammond even lampshades that the guy will probably be back.
Good thing Hawkeye wasn't around. This would definitely have been a wrinkle in the 'Avengers don't kill' debate.
Was Hank's intention just to trap him, siphon away his power, or did he know that he'd get exploded?
Who can say.
But Jim Hammond's emotional crisis is resolved anyway with Hank (kinda lying) and saying that it was Hammond's years of fighting experience that ensured victory and truthfully saying that Torch has a place in the Avengers West Coast.
Wasp even points out that robot Human Torch Jim Hammond has quite a history as a team player with his sidekick Toro, with the Invaders, and with the All-Winners Squad.
Hammond admits he was confused when he woke up but that everything seems to be falling into place for the first time in a long time. Hooray.
Now to get back to the compound.
Wasp: "That could be awhile. Unless, of course, Hank's got a spare miniaturized Rover in his pocket." Hank Pym: "Not exactly, Jan... Will a Quinjet do?" Wasp: "You know, Hank, I can't always recall why I divorced you... but somehow I can usually remember why I married you!"
Because he struck you and then tried to kill all of your friends to prove that he was a good team player.
Look, I go back and forth on whether Hank and Jan could get back together. And writers have different opinions on it too. But if they do get back together, they'll end in the same ugly place unless they remember why the relationship didn't work the first time.
And by they I mean the characters and the writers.
I don't have faith that the writers remember because since Byrne started shipping the characters together again, Wasp has been regressed back to her old, clinging to Hank and being his ego booster characterization.
I can't really see the Wasp that led the Avengers in her recent appearances in this book. And that's disappointing. And seeing writers trying to shove the characters back into a relationship and ignoring rather than addressing why they aren't together anymore... well, that's disappointing too.
As for this issue... Eh, it's a good one-off. A nice little adventure to unwind and rerail after a big event.
If this was Living Lightning's only appearance, he'd be a waste of an interesting character. But it's not so I won't judge too harshly.
Next in Avengers West Coast, my goodness, some Great Lakes Avengers filler! But also, we're back to alternating so instead of that, next week is more East Coast Avengers and the introduction of Rage.
Follow @essential-avengers because why not? What do you have to lose? Or to gaiiiiiiiin? Like and reblog to find out.
#avengers#essential avengers#west coast avengers#living lightning#robot Human Torch#hank pym#dr pym#the wasp#hawkeye#US Agent#Wonder Man#Iron Man#Scarlet Witch#Quicksilver#Agatha Harkness#Vision#lightning man fights fire man#whoever wins Fullerton doesn't
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for the send you a character, louis? thank you!!
THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THANK YOU
first impression: louis my poor meow meow my first impression was Rat Pitt in the movie when i was 15 and i’m so sorry for it. i hated his guts im sorry to say. i was watching that movie like my god get this man off my screen i thought he was so boring i was in tears from his lack of acting. then. then i read the book and i was like oh……oh he’s actually a really interesting character he’s full of contradictions and pain and his misery and grief is completely justified oh…….there were of course times i got fed up with his narration which i think is a natural occurrence of reading interview and there’s the nasty shit anne put in with him for whatever reason but i was on the whole extremely moved by him
impression now: jacob anderson and the show’s writing team brought this character to the same level of adoration for me that i have for lestat which is an astronomical feat. the depth of his show’s character is unbelievable, the changes they made to him elevated him to heights not previously known to mankind, he is everything i adore in this world, he’s my best friend my girl my brother in arms my husband and when he lies or is crazy i think it’s sooooo sexy. show louis is one of the best characters ever created im 100% serious if all else failed with the show i would keep watching it just for him. i love him so fucking much man. the layers to him…..like i honestly can’t really put it to words there’s just . so MUCH to him you know?? like his book counterpart there are so many contradictions but….it’s different in the show. i think with the book, anne created him as a psychological box to hold all the grief of that period in her life, so when she came back to the series ten years later it was too difficult for her to write him. but the show doesn’t have that deeply personal issue, the show has perspective, and it allows louis to blossom and thrive and reach his full potential in a way he never ever could before. i’m so thankful for what they all did for him every day 🥹 as for book louis, i wish he was in it more, when he is it’s such a treat. i remember in a post someone said we ITCH for louis to show up in the vc so we get a taste of interview again, the feeling that the first book gives us, and i think that really nails it. i’m looking forward to reading the final trilogy so i can see him be important again. all i want is for the show to keep him implemented as a main character, and they’ve said not to worry about that so i’m fucking thrilled
favorite moment: my fave book louis moment is him beheading santiago with the scythe, it’s soooo cool of him 🥰 my fave show louis moment is his bambi eyes on the balcony with lestat before the dance bc he’s so so pretty, and when he kills the alderman 🥰🥰🥰
idea for a story: i think louis should be the main character of memnoch the devil and he should get to meet satan 🗣️
unpopular opinion: him finding out armand killed claudia in the show isn’t going to change much, just like the book. that’s NOT the reason he and armand break up. of course it’s all spec but i foresee the show encapsulating the book’s core emotional arc with them.
favorite relationship: sigh. loustat .
favorite headcanon: the scene with him and lestat at the end of the first book did actually happen but lestat doesn’t remember it, and louis feels too bad to tell him so he just pretends he made it up so lestat isn’t humiliated. in the show he and claudia had a little book club
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BERNARD for the ask game >:)
HELPPP ok
first impression: ok i got into comics right around the time tim came out so my first impression was very much the general publics of "robin has a boyfriend!" i read the urban legends story about that first and thought it was fine! i liked it well enough. then bc it mentioned that bernard was a friend was high school i went back and read his original appearences and idk i just loved him... he was silly and he was posturing and nobody really liked him except tim LOL. his friendship and crush on darla was also rlly rlly sweet and i got rlly attached to the trio of them. i also rlly liked his og design w the longer hair and sunglasses. i thought the conspiracy theorist thing was rlly fun esp w how close hed get to the truth and tim would have to be like "what ur so crazy hahaha where would batman get MULTIPLE robins".
impression now: im gonna be honest my peak bernard phase was before tim drake robin started when i was really really excited to see more of this character id gotten attached to... erm. in a post tdr world ive kind of distanced myself from him bc he feels like an entirely different guy. which is fine! presumably hes aged and i wouldnt want to live like my high school self forever. that being said, the ways that he is the same feel a bit like a parody now. his conspiracies r way more outlandish and supernaturally based than they used to be, and they way theyve kind of written it so seems like he knew he was gay/bi back in highschool which doesnt rlly read as true to me having read those highschool appearances. hes just tims boyfriend, who knew he was gay before tim did and was just kind of waiting for him, i guess. i do like the chaos cult, i like that in the unspecified time away from tim his life was like. completely fucked. but now that tim is there it feels like hes just been flattened back out. the last few issues of tdr actually started focusing more on his issues specifically w his parents and the cult but. you know. cancelled.
favorite moment: he was so so scared to talk to darla he was like "losers like us cant talk to cool girls like her tim... shes friends with jocks" and then tim goes up to her and the jocks are all nice and polite normal guys and darlas like yeah u guys seem fun. and its just like. he was completely overreacting. like so much for his claims of being a social chameleon 😭 and then next issue darlas just a part of their group and theyre acting like theyve been best friends forever. i think for as much as he pretends to be like. a cool guy who doesnt care that he has no friends. its a rlly nice moment of showing that hes actually really anxious and self conscious and he wishes he could reach out to people but once he has the opportunity he latches on to ppl and doesnt let go. and i also rlly like when darla comes back and he finds out she has powers and his first reaction is like. my life sucks so bad can i come and be ur sidekick. like man:-( he was funny for it though! shoot ur shot
idea for a story: ok this is for a hypothetical "possible in comics" story and not like. a fic. so its not super bernard focused BUT they need to bring darla back now im not joking anymore where is she. idk what the status of shadowpact is post rebirth i dont think it exists anymore? but whatever. tim gets a case that leads him back to louis grieve where we can get a recap for ppl who didnt read or dont remember what happened back then. he can be like heres where i met bernard^_^ also the horrors. anyway the case has smth to do w the mob&darlas family and so he manages to get in contact w her and obviously shes like. i have no connection to that life anymore im not helping and i dont want to remember this. but reluctant team up👍 anyway bernard plays into this bc i think tim keeps it from him whats going on in the case bc he doesnt know that bernard was actually the first to know when darla came back and he doesnt want to upset him by bringing up old memories bc they Never talk about the shooting. and laura obviously isnt telling bernard bc she has no idea he and tim r dating so hes kept completely out of the loop and tim and darla/laura r NOT getting along. he keeps calling her darla and hes whinier than she remembers and theyre getting nowhere in the case bc they dont work very well together. i would also rlly want an issue where it goes over how each of them experienced the day of the shooting and there r small differences in each one to highlight how time has warped their memories and how theyre all a little unreliable. and each of them would be done by different artists 👍 anyway eventually bernard stumbles upon the case and hes pissed off at tim for keeping from him "darla was my friend too" you know. and smth he remembers about that day but the others dont (too caught up in the gang war/being robin) helps solve the case^_^ and hes able to help tim and laura get along again and they part on good terms w bernard and laura staying in touch. and at some point while he and tim r fighting he confronts tim for fucking off after the shooting and not reaching out to bernard until years later, and how bernard was completely left alone after one his best friends died and the other immediately moved away.
unpopular opinion: whyyyy does he want to be a chef its stupid sorry. emt or nurse bernard is the most important thing in the world to me i have no idea why they chose "chef" for his career path but it annoys me to no end. its another thing that just feels flat about his new character. like even if instead of being motivated by his history with unable to save darla from the shooting+the cult he was scared of wounds and violence and avoided it... why chef? idk itd be fun if he wanted to be like a radio host or smth that actually fit his personality. i think money should also be a bigger motivater for him bc he always read as like. upper middle class new money to me whos parents cut him off when he came out. like maybe if they showed him working as a line cook or an actual job i could understand him growing a passion for it but hes just like. a rich foodie. like what.
favorite relationship: he and tim i guess LOL who else does he have. him and darla for friendship and also i think it wouldve been cute if they had dated for a bit in highschool<3
favorite headcanon: i think he should be angrier at tim. for missing dates, for not telling him hes robin, for everything. hes too nice. or if theyre set on the nice thing i think it should be framed as him being a bit of a people pleaser/pushover post cult bc hes scared of tim leaving him and either way tim should have to address being kind of a shitty boyfriend. a nicer one is i think duke would be his favorite of tims siblings:-) hes not weird to bernard like i think the others would kind of be (shovel talk from dick would make me kms) and bernard never had any siblings so he kind of treats duke like a younger brother and tries to like, help duke with his homework, despite the fact that duke is definitely doing better in school than bernard did. i dont know if duke like. likes bernard but hell actually respond to his attempts at bonding unlike damian who has him blocked.
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Once Upon a Time season 5A thoughts
I’m rewatching OUAT and I wanted to share some of my opinions on each season!
- The random girl shushing his ominous speech is so funny
- Wow he just poofed into dust
- Omg the end of excalibur is the dagger
- “Mate don’t” idk why but that is funny
- “We need someone wicked” yassss
- Omg the rose
- Wow iconic move to cut her hand off to remove the bracelet
- She is so good at manipulating everyone
- Gaslight gatekeep girlboss
- “Accent’s a bit much no?” Lol rumple
- “Out dwarves, adults only” Regina…
- “Well… you don’t look like a crocodile” why is this episode so funny
- Okay I remember really not liking Arthur and the whole Camelot plot line
- OUAT loves a memory loss plot
- Omg dark emma
- She’s got a cool look
- Not dopey turning into a tree
- OMG WHAT IS THAT THING???
- Hook: Emma look at me this isn’t you
- Of course she can’t dance
- Omg that guy is evil or something
- A demon sent from the underworld… hmmmm I feel like I know a hot guy from there
- I seriously can’t wait for 5b to see my man <3
- Omg Henry and Violet is so cute (I remember liking them together)
- He whips out the ipod lol
- This song is kind of a bop
- Omg she destroyed his village
- I guess there was a Robin fake out death before it actually happened
- Can you make the price like a dollar or something? Or does it have to be of equal value
- “WE’VE BEEN VIOLATED” lol
- “Have you thought about kissing it out?” Omg that’s so funny
- Regina is such a hypocrite
- She has done things just as bad if not worse than what Zelena did and yet she deserves redemption and Zelena doesn’t???
- “I wished him happy just not with my wife” lol
- “What’s that then” “It’s a picture from up inside Zelena” “Woah mate” I’M DYING
- Arthur is giving me Louis from Versailles vibes
- And if you’ve seen my Versailles thoughts, you know how I feel about Louis (I hate him)
- Noooo not on her birthday
- DAVID NO DON’T TRUST HIM
- Omg they kissed
- I mean, if you’re neglecting your wife it’s kinda understandable if she cheats
- “Well, there’s this girl” “Is there indeed?” Loved the delivery Killian
- “Is that your dad?” “No it’s my horse” lol
- That’s sinister, using magic to keep your wife from leaving you
- Arthur is such an asshole omg
- Omg Merida is back
- “I need you to make him brave” wow that’s what her movie is called
- Ooh that’s Merlin
- I’m pretty sure he was talking about Nimue (and she was the first dark one)
- Well that’s a way to meet the dad
- “When this kingdom is attacked by ogres” WHY IS IT ALWAYS OGRES???
- Awwww that’s cute a little date
- “Um hi milady” lol
- Not the friend zone
- This is giving me so much second hand embarrassment
- Taunting rumple with belle is the way to make him brave
- She is his courage… that’s so cute
- Love the arrow in the intro
- Wow I guess no one cares about rumple then
- Slay belle for standing up for him
- NO NOT THE CHIPPED CUP
- Please tell me they can fix it :(
- NOOOOO DON’T KILL BELLE
- I do like the idea of rumple being all heroic for her
- Omg I’m crying this is so sweet
- Zelena and Emma team up??? Iconic
- YASSSS RUMPLE
- “He’s not my sweetheart” I think he is belle ;)
- OMG SLAY RUMPLE
- “You saved me” “Actually I think you saved me” AWWWWWWWW
- “I would change everything for you” screaming
- YASSSSSS RUMPLE PULLING THE SWORD
- I’m a slut for good rumple (or just rumple in general lol)
- I do miss him having magic though
- Why is Zelena so slay all the time?
- The outfits, the acting, the trickery, 10/10
- Emma’s lucky she didn’t get the dark one skin condition
- She just got a bleach job and a new outfit
- Arthur is such a dickhead omg i can’t stand him
- Lol Rumple’s Merlin impression
- Zelena was like switched sides? Time for an outfit change
- Omg she’s going into labour
- Why does every evil person want a baby? How many dark spells require that?
- Omg the house that he picked
- “Did someone scream for a doctor?” Yasssss Dr Whale is back!
- Did he go to the same hair salon as Emma lol
- Yassss mulan is back!
- Mulan and Merida: iconic team up
- RUBY!
- So many characters I love are back this season :)
- OMG IT WAS ARTHUR
- Me anytime I see Arthur: “Dickhead”
- OMG RUMBELLE
- MY HEART
- THEY ARE SO CUTE
- Regina & co are actually so awful to Zelena about this whole baby thing
- Like I get that it’s Robin’s baby but it’s hers too
- And I’m pretty sure being away from the mother is bad for a baby’s development
- Like at least let her visit with supervision
- I guess when you become the dark one you immediately know how to use magic
- Ok I guess they are letting her see her baby
- SHE CAME TO THE WELL
- NOOOOOOOO
- Was not expecting the break up part 2 :(
- Me sobbing
- How is she pregnant in 5b though???
- They must get together by the end of 5a
- Catch me opening the underworld portal so I can see my man <3
- The visual of all the dark ones sitting in the boat together is so funny to me
- It’s giving summer camp vibes
- “The underworld is worse than you could possibly imagine” uhhhh no rumple my true love is there so I think it’s pretty great
- Awwww rumple sending her to see the world
- NOOOOOO RUMPLE IS MARKED
- That’s actually so vile to send her away so she literally CANNOT SEE HER BABY
- Slay move by hook
- Rip (until he gets resurrected)
- Belle didn’t leave!
- THEY’RE KISSING
- YASSSSSSS
- And the baby was conceived ;)
- Rumple being the dark one again, kinda slay
- Kind of bad for his redemption arc though
- “I will always find you” we love a good iconic line
- I am so excited to see Hades!!! Love of my life (and death)
How I feel about the characters this season
Love: RUMPLE (10/10 character development), Belle, Zelena, Dr Whale, Merida
Like: Emma, Hook, Mulan, Ruby, Nimue (idk she’s kinda cool)
Neutral: Snow, David, Merlin, Guinevere, Henry
Dislike: Regina, Robin
Hate: Arthur
Season rating: 6/10
Firstly, I HATE ARTHUR AND I CAN’T WAIT UNTIL HE’S DEAD. I don’t care for the Camelot arc, but I do like dark Emma and Rumple got some really good character development (even though he went back to being the dark one). I also like Merida and it was nice to see Ruby, Dr Whale, and Mulan again. Gets an extra 0.5 for setting up my absolute favourite arc in the show (the underworld)
#ouat thoughts#once upon a time season 5a#once upon a time#ouat 5a#once upon a time season 5#emma swan#zelena mills#zelena#zelena ouat#regina mills#killian jones#captain swan#rumplestiltskin#belle french#rumbelle#ruby lucas#ouat mulan#ouat merida#dr whale#outlaw queen#ouat camelot#dark swan#the dark one#henry mills
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DMA'S praise 'amazing' Louis Tomlinson: "He's really cool, we respect him a lot"
Louis previously cited DMA'S as a heavy influence on his second solo album Faith in the Future
OFFICIAL CHARTS
By Carl Smith | 5 April 2023
When we spoke to Louis Tomlinson ahead of the release of his Number 1 album Faith in the Future last year, he couldn't have been more complimentary about collaborators DMA'S.
The Sydney rock three-piece - comprising Johnny Took, Tommy O'Dell and Matt Mason - inspired tracks like All This Time on Louis' second solo record after striking up a relationship with the One Direction star back in 2019; and the band would 'love' to see a team-up soon.
Chatting exclusively to Official Charts around the release of their brand-new LP How Many Dreams?, DMA'S guitarist Johnny explains how Louis influenced a track on their 2020 album THE GLOW.
"We got in the studio with Louis the first time we met him," says Johnny. "We sat around playing music; we played him some tracks off THE GLOW and played him the demo of Cobracaine.
"He’s obviously got a really great ear for pop music – and music in general – and he was like ‘maybe you should get to the chorus quicker.’ Just a little comment like that really helped. It was a good call, as a structural thing. We thought ‘yeah, we should get to the chorus quicker,’ and it ended up sticking."
When we tell him we admire DMA'S openness to working with an artist like Louis where many rock bands might have pre-judged his pop beginnings, Johnny explains: "When you’ve reached the heights that Louis’ reached, you’d have to be a little bit ignorant or naïve not to realise how much amazing stuff he’s picked up along the way. That’s my favourite thing.
"If I get into the studio with somebody who’s 10 years younger or 10 years older than me, I learn something new every time. That’s the great thing about any musicians getting together in a room; you just start talking and discover things through that discussion.
"Louis’ an amazing guy. He put me on the door for his gig in Melbourne, and I went backstage. We’d just played that same venue a few months before, and it was great to see him in Sydney. He’s just such a good guy. I love the way he champions young musicians. I really respect that.
"Louis’ really cool, I don’t have a bad word to say about that guy. He’s an amazing songwriter, too."
And Louis isn't the only 1D lad to have impressed Johnny and his DMA'S bandmates. Liam Payne's also an artist the group admire.
"It was the same when I first met Liam," says Johnny. "He was the same as Louis; they’re these guys that are up on this level, but they love guitar music and music in general. They’re open to championing young bands, those bands that are smaller than them, and lifting them up. They’re passionate about the music and that’s what it’s all about; everyone lifting everyone up."
[The above text has been edited.]
“It was the same when I first met Liam Gallagher," says Johnny. "He was the same as Louis; they’re these guys that are up on this level, but they love guitar music and music in general. They’re open to championing young bands, those bands that are smaller than them, and lifting them up. They’re passionate about the music and that’s what it’s all about; everyone lifting everyone up."
So we can see a DMA'S and Louis collab at some point, right?
"I’d love to," beams Johnny. "That’d be awesome."
Speaking to Official Charts about his admiration of the Aussie trio last year, Louis said: "I loved DMA’s last album THE GLOW, which Stuart Price produced. That has dance elements in it but was done in a really authentic way.
"It doesn’t feel remotely contrived or like a f**king made-for-radio pop-dance hybrid. That was really food for thought for me throughout the process.
"They’re amazing. I’ve been lucky enough to meet them a few times. Johnny [Took] came to one of my shows in Australia. They’re just really f**king lovely lads, great blokes. They’re an amazing live band."
Catch DMA'S performing at Y Not? Festival in Pikehall, Derbyshire this July.
DMA'S new album How Many Dreams? is out now via I OH YOU/MUSHROOM GROUP.
[Johnny Took and Louis Tomlinson in Melbourne, 26.7.22]
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Hey I don't know if you've seen the discourse about Louis' image that's been happening lately but I wanted to get your thoughts. As usual with tumblr people see things in two extremes. On the one end louis' image is awful and toxic and on the other end there is absolutely nothing wrong with louis' image and it's his real self 100% and how dare you criticize anything about him. I guess I fall somewhere in the middle. For me it's how he's been presented during promo. What are your thoughts?
I would say that I also fall somewhere in the middle and I think people have lost a lot of nuance in the conversation over the past few days. I kinda summarized my thoughts on this discussion a couple of weeks ago with this post.
I think Louis likes beer and football and doesn’t like wine or really fancy restaurants. At the same time, I do think he sometimes leans so hard into his “laddy” image sometimes that you lose the complexity of who he is, and I think he can come across as unlikable when he’s railing about things that other people enjoy even if he himself does not enjoy them. I think both he and his team try very hard to contrast him with typical Hollywood/rich people and want to make him fit in with the indie/alternative scene, but in the process, they often fail to show how emotionally intelligent, delicate, and sweet he is.
When you’re a huge fan, you do catch glimpses of that side of Louis through long interviews, interactions with fans, and behind-the-scenes footage. For much of general public, however, they often just see a lot of negativity related to Louis, whether it be the constant smoking or unhappy-looking photoshoots, the constant commentary from both him and interviewers about his drinking and smoking habits, and the comments where he’s talking about how much he hates wine, sushi, nice restaurants, TikTok, and so on. Even if those things are true, they shouldn’t be central to his image when there are so many positive, interesting, and impressive things to learn and see about him.
I think that unfortunately, both the general public AND a significant portion of this fandom fails to recognize that Louis has as many stereotypically feminine traits as he does stereotypically masculine traits. I think Louis and his team are partially responsible for the one-dimensional view of him and that’s why I wish they’d be more creative in how they present him. However, I also think fandom is partially responsible for the one-dimensional view of him (and of Harry, actually), and unfortunately, particularly the Larrie part of the fandom because so many Larries really embrace old-fashioned gender stereotypes and want Harry and Louis to be opposites, with Harry as the feminine partner and Louis as the masculine partner. When you look beyond their surface level images, that categorization is not accurate and they both have plenty of stereotypically feminine and stereotypically masculine traits.
Harry dresses the same as Louis does when he’s off the clock, is obsessed with exercise and fitness, and loves sports as much as Louis, as he enjoys football, American football, AND golf, which are all stereotypically masculine sports (whereas Louis only really cares about football). Louis wears a lot of expensive clothes, is always in tune with his emotions and the emotions of others, and is naturally flamboyant whenever he lets his guard down. So much of the fandom won’t acknowledge these truths because they don’t fit with their one-dimensional view of the boys or their assumptions about what role they both play in their relationship, which is based more on fanfiction than reality.
So anyway, all this to say - I definitely fall in the middle. I don’t think Louis is displaying toxic masculinity because he doesn’t like wine, but I also wish that he and his team would choose to reflect the complexities of who he is because I think it would help expand his audience and make him more likable to people who don’t see as much of him as we do.
I also think the fandom needs to stop reducing both Louis and Harry to one-dimensional and old-fashioned caricatures based on gender stereotypes and their not-fully-accurate public images. I hope that all made sense!
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Immediately my thumb hovered over the 'block' button.
This kid, Dr. Kane, has stumbled over in his attempts to impress me in the year he's worked here. Unfortunately he is in my station and phone communication is required for optimal team respondence. I held in my hand an official NASA device meant only for this purpose, and it could not be turned off. To my ultimate displeasure.
My feet dug deeper into the sand, as if to keep me from being physically dragged away. The seagulls produced their usual cacophony, yet they sounded more mocking than ever. I did not disturb my sleeping partner in the wicker chair beside me and reluctantly dragged sand into the beach house. Rented of course, I did not get paid enough for that and even if I did I don't like the idea of paying for something you'll only use once. But after years of, admittedly difficult as all hell, work my partner did convince me to take one deserved vacation.
I opened a few drawers before finding a small crank radio, the static I found more soothing than the glare of the TV. And no, you are not allowed to make fun of me. I turned the dial until voices could be heard above the static.
'No official reports have been confirmed....swimming, yes swimming, its way to Earth....Mars rovers have spotted blurry footage of the creature....Pluto has certainly surprised us time and....posts of memes have already surfaced and gone viral over...'
Perhaps Dr. Kane is supplying correct information this time around...
My NASA phone buzzed with ajillion calls coming in at once. I declined them all and called only one person, my other colleague Dr. Lenson. I say colleague but I really mean best man, in friend and wedding terms, since high school. If anyone was going to convince me of such an event it would be him.
Ring ring...
"Winston? I know you're-" His voice came out breathless.
"Pluto hatched?"
There was a pause before, "Pluto hatched."
I grunted and hung up. My vacation lasted one day and seven hours, more than I'd gotten in ten years at least. My partner walked in and could immediately guess the situation, it was a familiar one.
"Listen, Lou-" I started.
He held a hand up, "just say where."
I smiled, another reason to love him. He was a test pilot and helicopter enthusiast. You can guess how we got here.
I explained the ridiculous situation as he hopped in his helicopter, paint a bit chipped but he liked it that way. It would take two hours to get back, in that time I hoped they'd learn this was all a fantasy but something told me to keep an open mind. My phone kept buzzing and as soon as we took off I threw it out the window.
---
When I arrived NASA was in shambles. Not literally torn into bits but everyone was acting like it was about to be. Me and Lou maneuvered through everyone's lunatic speed walking. We entered a main control room, at which point I realized we were still wearing our vacation shirts and looked like confused tourists. Dr. Kane and Dr. Lenson rushed over to us, Kane struggling with a large stack of papers and Lenson relieved beyond belief.
"Thank goodness you're here, hi Louis, we have more footage, Kane drop those papers already! Dr. Lenson spoke in a hurry and we all shuffled to the screens in the front of the room.
The screens were filled with one image. A giant chick floating in space.
I looked at Lenson like I was considering giving him a good bump on the head.
"Where's the footage?"
"Is this your wallpaper?" Lou asked.
Dr. Kane relieved his arms of the papers, looking incredibly hesitant to answer our questions.
"That....is the footage, sir."
Lou laughed. I lunged for those papers and shifted through them as quickly as a tornado topples a house. They were strings of code and back and forth messages between the rovers and us. I never accepted any records unless they were paper, and Kane had learned it well. The papers flew to the ground until I reached the last one, panting.
Lou placed a hand on my arm and I lifted the page with shaky hands. It had two lines.
Unidentified flying object Received: Got you
"This has got to be a joke."
"I think that's the point, sir." Said Dr. Kane.
I looked back up at the screen. A perfect replica of a baby chicken, bright yellow and as big as five semi trucks combined. Or perhaps three elephants. It was floating comfortably between Jupiter and Mars, making a squiggly beeline to Earth.
"Team K is working on sending a transmission back-" Said Dr. Lenson, typing on three computers at once. "-We don't know exactly where it is and teams A-J are busy within the chicken-"
"Back? Send back to who?" Don't say aliens...
"Aliens!" Exclaimed Kane with wide eyes. He was the type to believe in fantasies. He had a fake sword at his desk for Pluto's sake.
Lou laughed again, my first 'bring your partner to work day' was becoming a mockery.
He spoke up, "Well what are teams L-Z doing?"
Lenson scratched his five o' clock shadow. "Well they are..."
"Building the net." Kane finished.
---
We stood outside one of the many buildings at one of the launchpads. Except, instead of sending something off we were going to be receiving something. Teams A-J had calculated the chicks landing to exactly this spot, and now we were running around putting together a net like children. Or to be more fitting, headless chickens.
Lenson carried a laptop with footage of the floating chick, he never was without a screen. Me and Lou attempted to organize the plans, as everyone seemed to have a different idea on how nets were built. While Kane ran back inside to grab some more things. A rough estimate was that the chick would land in less than twenty minutes. The work was easier as the shadow of this beast reached us first. Whenever it quacked, and yes it quacked, a gust of wind would come through.
"Just like vacation Winst, shade and a breeze." Lou said in between pushing boxes of supplies around, while I scribbled and erased on a paper.
"Except the only foul I had to worry about were the seagulls."
"The world might end today, but I'm still having fun." Leave it to him to make light of things.
I scoffed. "Glad you're enjoying yourself."
"Come on winner, you work too hard." He wiped a bit of sweat off my brow. He always called me a winner, even when I failed. Especially when I failed.
"That doesn't exactly apply in an emergency."
He sighed, "I know. But we finally took a vacation and now here you are back at work."
"That's not fair."
"I mean-"
"I got it!" Interrupted Kane, waving his...oh no. Waving his sword, which he called ancient but was clearly made last year by the tag on the bottom.
"Kane, no offense, but you are an idiot." I said.
He ignored me. "We might have to fight Spartacus."
"Excuse me?" Said Lou as confused as I was.
"The chicken! He might be a mean chicken."
"You named it?!"
Lenson came up to us, "T-minus ten minutes until the chick-"
"Spartacus." Corrected Kane.
"-lands here, be ready and...do something? Just be useful."
We were all lost, (some more than others), and all we could do was stand and wait. In silence. Almost.
"What if the landing cooks Spartacus?"
"Shh!" I shushed him though there was no reason to be quiet.
"Lets not think of upsetting things." Added Lou.
---
As hoped, the giant chick landed safely in the net. Somehow not being affected by space's atmosphere or the heat that came with landing. There wasn't really much to say, it was a chick. A seemingly indestructible chick. I heard many rounds of conversation over cooking it or sending it to a zoo. Kane relented his sword and hugged it. I pulled him away. The chick stood there looking curiously at us all.
Lenson announced that team K had figured out where the alien aircraft was and was able to send messages back now.
"You should ask them what kind of sick joke this is." I said.
"We're aiming for a bit more professional than that." Lenson said typing furiously.
But what on earth do you say to aliens for the first time?
NASA headquarters Transmission: ???
"Is three too many?" Inquired Kane.
"I think it portrays our confusion quite well." I replied, though I would've preferred to cuss them out.
Soon a beep was heard around the time the chick was getting a bit too close to me.
Unidentified flying object Received: ;)
"Now this is really a joke."
I was expecting to hear Kane say his 'I told you's' but he didn't, instead there were cooing noise behind me.
"Not again-"
Not only was Kane petting the chick but Lou too.
"Lou don't touch it!"
"But he's nice! Come pet him."
The chick started down at me, standing closer than I'd like it to be.
Lou grabbed my hand to lead it up to the chicks feathers, so big I could probably use one as a blanket.
I protested. "We don't know what kind of diseases-"
"He's from Pluto! There's nothing to fear."
"That's a pretty good reason to fear-"
My hand pressed onto the chick and I felt its soft feathers. The chick quacked again and leaned its head down to my level.
"Oh no you don't!" My eyes widened as its shadow enveloped me. It nuzzled its beak against me, poking my sides in a ticklish manner.
"Spartacus likes you!" Said Kane.
Too much.
—-
There was more discussion on what to do with it. The aliens did not give much more explanation other than three condescending ‘hahaha’s.’
Kane kept petting it and I didn’t bother to stop him, he was an idiot. However my own partner betrayed me and showed a fondness for the creature, as the creature showed a fondness for me.
Lou practically begged me to not let NASA hurt it, and really I can’t say no to that face.
“We could take care of him!”
“We? I have work.”
He frowned, “that’s what you-“
“Always say, I know.”
I thought for a moment. Chicks didn’t eat more than grain, but how much would it need? And don’t even get me started on living space or the potential of it growing even larger or suddenly getting a taste for blood or-
Lenson interrupted my thoughts. “Winston, your team’s waiting for an answer.”
Sometimes I hated having power.
“We, me and Lou, could…take care of it?”
Lou brightened. Lenson raised his eyebrows.
“How would you even do that?” He questioned.
“Make it my new job.”
I’d had the same job for over fifteen years straight, ‘new’ wasn’t exactly a word an older man like me used. I didn’t regret it though.
Everyone agreed and a plan was set. NASA would provide a space for the chick to live and fundings as long as I studied and took care of him. Humane studies, only observations.
Lou was beyond happy and considered this a permanent vacation. He helped me of course.
Spartacus became a new part of our family.
You are a scientist working for NASA. In the middle of a well-deserved vacation, your relaxing week off is interrupted by a short, urgent text message from one of your colleages: “PLUTO HATCHED.”
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Nathan Forester and his team of Dan Aykroyd characters consisting of Elwood Blues (from the Blues Brothers), Ellis Fielding (from Loose Cannons), Grocer (from Grosse Pointe Blank), John Burns Jr (from The Couch Trip), Ray Stantz, Beldar, Ray Zalinski, Clifford Skridlow, Mike Webber, Irwin Mainway, Darren ‘Mother’ Roscow, and Frank Tree, were a crime-fighting team that fought villains and brought them to justice. Nathan himself had powers, he was a Were-Aykroyd who fought villains and lived a spectacular double life, which gave him the best of both, brains and brain at the same time.
He and his fellow Aykroydantaiums took down the dreaded Aykroydastians consisting of Vic Frohmeyer, the undead version of Elwood, Bob (from Susan’s Plan), Pa Tex, and Wade Motch, these Aykroydian trouble-makers were the ultimate in evil, always trying to ruin Nathan’s good time and trying to make his Were-Aykroyd side turn evil just like them. One afternoon, the Aykroydastaniums were sick of losing to Nathan and they gathered together at Pa Tex’s ranch
for a new evil plan.
“That Nathan is always ruining our plans.”
“Indeed he is, if only his were-aykroyd side wasn’t a hero.”
“That way we wouldn’t be grounded.”
‘It is indeed not fair in the slightest.’ Wade Motch added. ‘That we get grounded and we have to eat lumpy potatoes.’ ‘Yes, those potatoes are the real monsters, not us.’ ‘What if we actually did get the Were-Aykroyd side to turn evil and fully corrupted Nathan into becoming Aykroydian and forgetting who he is?’ ‘Oh yes, that sounds devious and I love it.’ ‘But how do we do that? We can’t sway that goodie two shoes Were-Aykroyd into being a villain, he is so heavily devoted to justice.’
‘Maybe there is a way.’ ‘Bob, are you pondering what i’m pondering?’ ‘I think so Frohmeyer, but if people celebrated Christmas all year, wouldn’t Christmas itself be pointless and just another day?’ ‘Time to use our dark powers to influence that Were-aykroyd.’ The group of evil Aykroyd characters laughed as they began to work on a special plan to get that were-aykroyd alter-ego of Nathan’s to be evil. Meanwhile at the appointment, Nathan and his Aykroydian brothers in the Aykroydantiums had just returned from battling villains and were looking forward to relaxing and hanging out together.
“We did it guys, we taught those demons a lesson.”
“Oh yes, we certainly did, well done to all of us.”
“Couldn’t have done it without you guys.”
“Aaaaw, do you really mean that?”
“Yes, you’re all my brothers and I love you.”
Nathan hugged Louis Winthorpe III, Elwood and Darren ‘Mother’ Roskow, as Grocer chuckled, happy that he was able to use his hitman skills for good. ‘Your were-aykroyd form also kicked some serious butt, pal and i’m very impressed.’ ‘I’ve been training a lot since we first met and i’ve learned that my were-aykroyd self isn’t too different from me, we both like horror, we like monsters, we like fighting evil, and we are both awesome.’
“I am glad he is on our side.’ ‘As I am. I never can imagine him being evil.’ ‘’Well come on, on boys, let’s just chill and hang out.’ That afternoon the team hung out together with Mel and That Werebelushi In The Shades, they listened to music and when the evening came around, everything was very eventful and they decided to take it easy.
When night-time came around they spent a lovely time together indoors watching all the movies they were from, after they all got ready for bed a couple of hours later, Nathan got into bed and he told the Aykroydantiums and Mel and Matthias to keep watch after he had brushed his teeth, he said good night to his brothers as he turned out the light and drifted off to sleep. While he slept, Vic Frohmeyer sent Wade Motch up to Nathan’s room to corrupt his dreams, which he did.
Nathan began to toss and turn as he began to have a nightmare, in his nightmare, he and his brothers were dealing with a dark presence that was trying to possess their friend the Were-Aykroyd. ‘No, don’t harm our brother.’ Ellis Fielding shouted. ‘Yes, Dan’s our beloved brother, and if you even think about harming him yet alone corrupting him, we are going to teach you a lesson you won’t forget.’ Ray Stantz pulled out his proton pack and began to fire at the demonic presence, the entity laughed evilly, as he floated over to Dan, the good-natured heroic Were-Aykroyd.
‘Don’t you dare, don’t you dare do this to me.’ Dan retorted, using his agility to dodge the dark energy bolts coming from the entity’s hands. ‘Oh but I must, I must use my powers to take over you.’ Mike Webber charged towards the evil entity and tried to prevent the entity from coming near his brother, using an exorcism spell to keep him from harming the others, of course all this did was provoke the entity further as he used his powers to keep the brothers in place, he hovered over Dan and then without hesitation, took on a misty form and entered the Were-Aykroyd’s body, possessing him in the process.
‘Aaaaah! Get out of me right now!’ ‘I’m going to be looking forward to using you.’ ‘No, no, don’t do this.’ ‘You can do this, you can fight his influence!’ Clifford Skridlow exclaimed. Dan convulsed and felt like he was going to be sick as the demonic entity had taken control of his body, his whole body convulsed and contorted.
‘Get Mel and Matthias, I need them to help me.’ ‘Right on it.’ Clifford and Elwood called up Mel and Matthias/That Werebelushi In The Shades.
Matthias and Mel came to the rescue as soon as they saw Dan was in trouble…’We’ve got to get that evil entity out of Dan before he corrupts him.’ ‘Thank goodness you two are here, would you please help me? Help me. I don’t want him to take over me.’ ‘Got it.’ The koala-girl used a power similar to Vyond logic to prevent the Were-Aykroyd from being possessed but her magic didn’t seem to be as effective.
Dan convulsed…’I don’t want to be evil like those Aykroydastians, I want to remain nice and good, i'm the hero not the villain. Please help.’ He convulsed and broke down in tears as he painfully transformed into an evil version of himself as the demonic entity possessed his body, making him a ‘Dark Were-Aykroyd’. ‘Eeek! Dan, is that you?’ ‘Dan isn’t here anymore, at least as the goodie two shoes he used to be, now he’s me and he’s bad and he likes it.’
“Our brother would never like being evil.”
“That’s right.”
The dark version of Dan floated over the group of Aykroyd characters and attempted to attack them, but Grocer dove in the way and protected his sibling. ‘I won’t let you do this to my brother, he’s not just a were-aykroyd, he’s our sibling, and he’s loyal to us, he won’t bend to your will.’ ‘Oh but he will. And I want him to turn Nathan for me.’ ‘Nathan will turn Aykroydian whenever he wants, and he won’t do it because you’ve told him to.’
“We’ll just see about that.”
Mel protested against this as she went out of her way to defend her friend, hulking out and roaring as she did so…’You make me so mad when you try to corrupt my friends like that, you are a sick disgusting monster, I hate you, and all you stand for! Mel doesn’t like it when you do that, it makes me want to smash you!’ She picked up a table and threw it at the demon possessed Dan, but the dark Were-Aykroyd chuckled with a smirk on his face. ‘You and that Werebelushi would make great Were-Aykroyds. I cannot wait to turn you two.’
“YOU…LEAVE MY FRIENDS OUT OF THIS, LEAVE THEM ALONE!’ Nathan shouted, his eyes glowing as he concentrated some of his Were-Aykroyd powers. It was clear that he didn’t want his normally good-hearted Were-Aykroyd to harm his friends. ‘You’re so loyal to your friends, I have been denied a chance to take control for so long and your friends are about to be part of the best show ever. Think about it Nathan, wouldn’t it be fun to turn them and watch them become like us?’ ‘No it wouldn't, Dan..whatever has gotten into you, should be let right the hell out right now. Evil spirit, whatever you are, get out of my Aykroydian alter-ego’s body or i’ll use my own were-aykroyd powers on you.’
Nathan tried to plead with the corrupted version of his friend but when that didn’t work, he decided to fight him, by turning into his Were-Aykroyd form in a way similar to when Tommy wolfed out on Big Wolf On Campus. ‘If you want Dan, evil spirit, you are going to get through me first and I warn you, I am much tougher than the average Were-Aykroyd tends to be.’
He leapt into the air, using his enhanced agility to dodge the attacks of Possessed/Dark Dan, if he couldn’t get through to his alter-ego, the best he could do was fight him. Which he did, he fought him with all his might and his powers. His Aykroydian brothers cheered him on and hguged him after he had taken down Dan in his possessed state. ‘Sorry that I had to do this to you, I mean me, I mean myself..but that entity took control of you and I had no other choice.’
Mike Webber performed an exorcism spell to try and get the demonic entity out of Dan’s body, the evil version of Dan chuckled as he thought of this was amusing. Luckily it didn’t take long for the demonic entity to exit Dan’s body and for Dan to return to his normal adorkable self. ‘Boys, i’m back!’ ‘Hurray! We did it.’ ‘Indeed we did. To paraphrase my fellow ghostbuster Peter Venkman, we came, we saw, we kicked his ass!’ ‘We did it.’
All of the Aykroydantiums cheered…and that nightmare was over, it was now a much nicer dream. Nathan awoke feeling much better than he did when he had the nightmare,but then he realized that it wasn’t done yet, as another nightmare was about to happen. In this new nightmare, Nathan was with Dan, his Were-Aykroyd alter-ego. His Aykroydian alter-ego was keeping watch for the night and checking up on him, when he sensed something odd in the air, he could hear the distant sound of sinister laughing as the evil/possessed version of himself materialized. ‘You? But I thought we defeated you, and got rid of you.’ ‘You think you can get rid of me? Ha, you cannot get rid of me, you never will be able to. I am you, I always will be you.’ ‘No you won’t, i’m good and you’re evil, I will never become like you.’
The evil version of Dan chuckled as he levitated around his counterpart, he thought that it was noble for his counterpart to be on the side of good but he thought it would be way more fun to manipulate him and control him, so he dove into Dan’s body, and Dan doubled over as he convulsed, shifting into his evil counterpart’s form. ‘Dan, are you okay?’ ‘I am more than alright, Nathan. Now, how about you come here? You want to be a Were-Aykroyd, don’t you? Let me help you.’
Nathan backed away, feeling afraid…’Dan, you look different, you sound different, you’re not the same adorable were-aykroyd you usually are, you have an evil aura.’ ‘But I feel so good, and you will too. If you just let me touch you.’ ‘No, don’t, don’t…’
He attempted to make a run for it and attempted to fight off the corrupted version of Dan, only for the corrupted version of Dan to touch him..causing Nathan to feel a surge of pain going through his body. ‘Owwww, owww…what’s happening? What’s going to happen to me?’ You are going to become the Were-Aykroyd I always know you’ve wanted to be.’ ‘I already am the best Were-Aykroyd I can be.’ ‘Oh but I can make you like Dan Aykroyd himself and I know how, just trust me.’
Nathan refused to listen to the evil Were-Aykroyd that was trying to manipulate him, he covered his ears and tried to think pleasant thoughts, only to feel a surge of pain jolting through his body as he began to feel like he was burning up…’Jesus christ! Aaaaaah! I’m burning up!’, there was a loud cracking and crunching sensation as his hand slowly began to enlarge and grow, the skin on his hands was maturing as well and brown hairs slowly grew on his hands.
“My hands, no…no…please, it hurts.”
“But it feels to transform doesn’t it? You’ve always wanted this, haven’t you, Dan?”
‘My name isn’t Dan, I am Nathan Forester, I am not Dan Aykroyd.’ ‘Oh but you will, you are a Were-Aykroyd, and you will become Dan Aykroyd and love it.’ ‘No I won’t..aaaaah!’ Nathan groaned as the pain surged through his body, he attempted to try and escape from the apartment, attempting to keep the transformation at bay.
‘Oh but you will, don’t think you can escape me, I am you, you are me.’ ‘No i’m not.’ ‘Oh yes you are, just look at you, you are changing, you’re becoming like me.’ Nathan objected to the very motion of becoming like this evil version of his Aykroydian alter-ego, he didn’t write the Were-Aykroyd stories to be like this, in his Were-Aykroyd stories the Were-Aykroyd was always good and wouldn’t harm anyone yet alone his friends. He wrote the Were-Aykroyd character to be charming and nice, not this malevolent monster. ‘I don’t want this, I don’t want to be like you, I just want to be a good were-aykroyd who fights villains, not to be a villain myself.’
“Oh but I am no villain, I am helping you.”
“Helping me? How is this helping? This is horrifying.”
‘Horrifying? I think you mean horrifying-ly good, because I am helping you unlock the you that is your true you, you act like you are anything but an Aykroyd, but you always will be one.’ ‘I may be a Were-Aykroyd but I will never be like you.’ ‘Oh but you are, just look at you, you’re going to become just like me and you will love it.’ ‘Nooo, noo, nooo.’ He groaned in pain as he pulled back his sleeve, just in time to see brown hair slowly growing on his arms which were broadening and growing with a sickening crunching sound.
“Dan, please don’t do this. The Were-Aykroyd I wrote wouldn’t do this.”
“But I am so much better than that, you wrote me to be perfect.”
‘But you’re evil, not what I imagined you to be.’ ‘Now now, don’t be like that.’ Nathan couldn’t believe what was happening, normally he would be in control of his Were-Aykroyd side and he could morph whenever he wanted but Dan had other plans for him, plans to warp him into the perfect Were-Aykroyd. Nathan’s torso and chest begin to broaden and grow, pushing against his shirt which was tightening and making it difficult for him.
“Dan, stop this, this isn’t you.”
“Oh but it is, and it will be you too.”
He felt sick, he felt like he was going to throw up and like he had eaten something bad, as his stomach began to growl and gurgle, as a hunger built up from within, he panicked, attempting to suppress the hunger but Dan’s hunger and presence were becoming more known, becoming one with his own one. ‘No, no…I must suppress it. I cannot become like you, this isn’t supposed to happen.’
Rushing into the kitchen of his apartment he went to grab something to eat, hoping anything would satiate the hunger of this Aykroydian monster that was forming within. Nathan’s shirt was getting increasingly tighter as he began to pull it off and attempted to tear it off, panting and groaning as a few buttons popped off it and flew off. ‘'I gotta get it off, gotta get it off..must stop the transformation, gotta get it off.’
“'I have your arm hair now, and your hands, and your skin.”
“Oh yes, you have them alright, and look at you.”
“This isn’t me, I have to get it off.”
He began to rip off parts of his shirt only for the rest to start ripping away to reveal his growing chest and torso, which were broadening and growing the same brown hairs on them, his stomach growling as it enlarged and developed brown hairs on it, he groaned, the pain was becoming unbearable and he desperately hoped this would just be a nightmare. He struggled to get the shirt off and he fell down onto his back, moaning in agony. ‘You won’t be needing that anymore. Now that I have your form, you have no idea how long I have always wanted to have control of your form like this.’ ‘No you haven’t, for the most part you always have to wait until nightfall to emerge, that is how it goes and how I wrote it to be. You are a Were-Aykroyd, and like me, you have to wait until nightfall.’
The hunger was starting to get to Nathan…’I must resist this, I am not you, I never will.’, he attempted to get up, which he did, but he felt disorientated…’Dan, please stop this, I feel disorientated, I feel like the room is shrinking.’ ‘You’re going to grow my friend, you’re going to grow into a big sexy Were-Aykroyd. That's why you feel disoriented. My hunger for food and everything else you have is your hunger now. You want to eat. You want to feed the ever-growing and ever-expanding me, do it Nathan. This were-aykroyd is hungry and he wants food to grow his power to even greater heights. That's the feeling you're having.’ ‘Dan, this is torture, please stop this.’ ‘Torture? Ha, this is fun.’
‘No no no…agh, it hurts me. Have you no idea how awful this is? I just want to be normal, to escape from your insidious grasp, but you're always there, mocking me, taunting me, you’re not the Dan I wrote about, you’re not the Dan I love, you are this twisted psychopathic version of him that wants to control me.’ ‘You are normal, Nathan. You are becoming what you must be. There is no longer a Nathan, he is dead. Accept your were-aykroyd transformation, accept your destiny. Why deny this, why deny your destiny? Give in.’ ‘Why would I want to do that? This isn’t my destiny, my destiny isn’t to become this monster.’ ‘Don't fight it, Nathan. We are almost close to achieving my goal of making you mine forever, almost there. Just a bit more and you will be Dan Aykroyd, and be a Were-Aykroyd forever. It's too late, to go back now. Please make this easy, Nathan, don't make this painful for yourself. Just give into it now, accept your destiny.’ ‘This isn’t my destiny.’ ‘Please stop this.’
‘I wrote the transformation to be shocking yet oddly soothing, yes I did write it to be entrancing half-way through the process but only because I start slipping in and out of trance. Yes, the transformation does become entrancing halfway through the process. I felt it myself as I was transforming you. It is why I will make this as easy as possible, why I will make this as painless as I can. We are almost at the halfway point, Nathan, just a little more. Don't fight it, give in now.’ ‘This isn’t how it is supposed to go, stop trying to control me, this isn’t nice, this isn’t you.’
“Oh but it is, and it is you as well…Dan.”
“My name isn’t Dan Aykroyd, it’s Nathan, Nathan.”
“You look like Dan to me, look at you.”
‘Why are you doing this to me, Dan? Please end this, please. This can’t be real, this cannot be happening.’ ‘It is happening, Nathan. You cannot avoid this anymore. Your transformation is progressing, it is happening, you know it. Embrace it now.’ ‘I will never embrace the changes you are forcing on me, I will never be like you. I don’t want to turn out the way you have.’ ‘And yet you're changing, Nathan. You're getting closer to me. You might not want to accept it, but it's true and you know it. You're becoming me, you're becoming Dan, and you're filling with me. You're growing in size as we speak, and I'm filling your mind with my thoughts and desires. Accept it, Nathan. Your body is becoming just like me now, becoming Dan. Matthias will be just like us. There's no one to fight us, no one to save you and Matthias from this fate.’
Nathan shook his head and objected to the Were-Aykroyd’s words. ‘No, he won’t, Matthias is my friend, and once he finds out what you have been doing to me he will unleash his John Goodman style fury on you and will kick your ass.’ ‘Oh but he’s no match for me.’ ‘He’s superhumanly strong and gets even stronger when he’s mad, you wouldn’t want to pick a fight with him and if you ever go so far as to hurt him I am breaking every part of your body.’ ‘Well then…I might just have to turn him.’ ‘I won't let you get him or turn him. You know how he feels about were-aykroyds, he already has one for a roommate who is very dubious, he doesn't need to experience the horrors of one.’ ‘Oh, but he will, Nathan. Once you, Nathan, turn into Dan, you'll have no issue convincing Matthias that it's okay to be with us, with the were-aykroyds. After all, Nathan, what are friends for if we can't fight your foes? Matthias will change his mind very quickly. And he'll be just like you, just like Dan. He'll be stronger than ever. Do you know what Matthias would do with just a small amount of your new power, Nathan? Do you know? He'd be unstoppable.’ ‘Yeah but the name of his show is That Werebelushi In The Shades, the title wouldn't make sense anymore if he wasn't welll…a Belushi-esque monster.’ ‘And yet you forget, Nathan, you forget…Once you turn into Dan, I take control of you. Once you're filled with me, you'll be able to convince Matthias of anything. That title will change, and he'll be happy as a were-aykroyd. The title shall be altered, and it shall be perfect that way. Don't deny what is meant to be, Nathan.’
‘He was born a Werebelushi and he is going to stay as one. You cannot change him other-wise. Besides, you cannot make me do everything as you. You cannot make me be like you, I refuse to turn out like you.’ ‘Don't you understand yet, Nathan? You must do it. I'm not asking you, Dan, I'm ordering you. The transformation will be complete soon, and you will see how right I am. Your friend Matthias will change, and he'll be Dan, just like you. No matter how much you try to fight it, it is inevitable. You are already Dan, and Matthias will be too. The title will be changed, and the name of the show will be perfected. Don't fight me anymore, don't fight your destiny.’ ‘'Dan, this isn't exactly playing fair. Besides, we can't all be Dan. That's you, and to a lesser extent, sort of me but it isn't me.' ‘It is fair, and you are Dan. You're becoming more like me, more like Dan. And you're being filled with me. It is meant to be this way. And with you, Matthias, soon enough there will be another Dan here, another true Dan. And even more will follow, spreading and filling everyone with the power of Dan. We were meant to be many. Don't fight it, Dan, accept what is destined to be.’
“No, it’’s not, I was not made for this, you cannot make me like this. You cannot make me assimilate others into being Aykroydian.”
“And why not, my friend?”
‘It is against what I stand for.’ ‘You will stand for something completely different when I am done with you, now let’s just relax, and enjoy your change, Dan.’ ‘This isn’t you, Dan, you’re supposed to be a good were-aykroyd and now this demonic entity has taken control of you and made you evil, you are corrupting me like this and I don’t like it.’ ‘Oh but you obviously do like it and you are destined for this, to be my good Were-Aykroyd, to serve me.’ ‘Not if Mel has anything to say about it, that koala-woman can kick some serious monster butt. And since you're going to be a full blown villain as opposed to me..’ ‘This isn't about the koala-woman Mel, Dan. It's about you and Matthias, your future, the future of our entire planet. Even Mel herself could be transformed with the power of Dan if we so wish. And we do wish to transform her, do we not? Do you and I not want to see this world taken over by Dan and filled with true were-aykroyds? It is how it is meant to be. Our true nature. Don't fight it, Dan, don't fight what you and I were meant to become. This is our destiny.’ ‘Leave so much as a scratch on my friends and you'll find that there is one thing a were-aykroyd like you cannot do.’ ‘"Oh, and what is that? What is it that I cannot do? If you're speaking of Mel, I assure you she could become a were-aykroyd too. Would you enjoy seeing that happen, Dan? Would you enjoy seeing your friend be with us? Would you enjoy seeing her embrace her destiny, to become one with us? With me? There is no fighting against what you've become, what this world was meant to be like. Don't deny it. Don't deny your true nature, Dan.’ ‘She's already turning into different species and she is my friend, she is a shapeshifter with a condition.’ ‘So, she's already becoming so many other creatures? Why would she want to stay human, when being an were-aykroyd could bring so much happiness to this world? I am the key to her happiness. Don't deny her of it. You must share the gift with her, let her become Dan, let her join us with all of our friends. The world needs to be changed, to be truly perfect, to be filled with us. Don't deny her this, and don't deny it for yourself too. Join us, Dan. Join the were-aykroyd legion.’ ‘'I don't want this and I am not Dan Aykroyd, I love him and always will but never will be him mentally. It's not how turning were-aykroyd works.’
‘There is no turning back, Dan. You don't have a choice anymore. You've changed too much now. Just give up and give in to your true nature. Accept who you are meant to be, Dan. You are an were-aykroyd. You are meant to transform others, including your friends. Including Matthias, including Mel the shapeshifter. Don't you wish to see your world become a perfect place? Don't you want everything to be the way you always wanted? It is possible, it is within your reach. Give in, Dan, and let everything be completed.’ Nathan tried to ignore the evil Were-Aykroyd’s words, he tried to suppress them but the words grew stronger and echoed into his mind. ‘No it’s not my destiny, stop this. You are normally very capable of being nice but now you’re evil, can’t be nice for even a minute, and are giving me my worst nightmare.’
“A nightmare? Oh this is no nightmare.”
‘Dan, this isn’t and never will be you. You weren’t made to assimilate and corrupt innocent people yet alone me and my friends, snap out of it.’ ‘Oh but I am and you are too, Dan, Danny Aykroyd, is that who you are? Yes, it is.’ ‘This is a nightmare, it cannot be happening.’ ‘Yes, it is happening now. The transformation won't stop once it hits the halfway point. You must realize this by now. All you need to do is give into it. Let it happen to you. Let yourself change into the true form you know yourself to be now. It is your destiny, Nathan. There is no going back anymore, you will always be a Were-Aykroyd.’ ‘True, but I will never be like you.’
“But I think you will be, look at you.”
“I know, I don't want to give in.”
‘Oh but you should, just look at you…isn’t it fun to become a were-aykroyd like me? You’re already coming along so well.’ ‘No, i' m not. You are not the were-aykroyd I imagined..I didn’t write you to be like this.’ ‘But, Dan, I am an were-aykroyd. You created me as one. You made me as a were-aykroyd. And don't you want to accept the transformation? Don't you want to be this amazing new being? Just give yourself over to me, Dan, and let me fully fill you. You can transform Matthias too, and he'll be just like us. And then Mel can become Dan too. And we can all be happy together. The world is within your grasp.’ ‘We cannot all be Aykroyds, I won't let you corrupt my friends. Brainwashing isn't nice.’ ‘But this isn't a normal brainwashing, this is your true destiny calling to you, Dan! Don't deny it! Don't deny us! We all can be Dan, we all can be happy and strong. Even Mel, and she will be even more powerful. You can transform them all, Dan, and they will be filled with you and with power. Don't fight it. Don't fight what is meant to be. I am your destiny. I am your one and only true purpose. Accept it. Become me. Become Dan Aykroyd.’
“No, I refuse to do that.”
Nathan groaned as he looked down at his stomach which was broadening and gaining weight, developing hair on on it as he instinctively started to stroke it, he wanted to fight his urges but he couldn't as he found himself becoming entranced, enjoying the change. But he then snapped out of it. ‘What was I doing? Why did I act like I enjoyed that?’ ‘You felt it, didn't you, Dan? You felt the transformation. You felt the change within you. You liked it, didn't you? You wanted this, you asked for it. Accept the were-aykroyd inside you. Embrace who you are meant to be.’ ‘No, you were messing with my head and making me think that I like it, stop it.’
It was that at this point Nathan was mad at Dan and he charged at him with superhuman strength, knocking him down. ‘You made me do this. You are in so much trouble.’ ‘Hehe, trouble? Me, in trouble? Now that's a funny joke! Now, come on, Dan. Don't fight your fate anymore. Don't fight what you always wanted to be. Why do you think you made me an were-aykroyd like you? It's because you are one! You can't deny it forever, Dan. This is inevitable, this is our destiny. Don't fight me anymore. Don't fight nature. And don't fight Mel, and Matthias. They'll be Dan's too one day. Give in.’
‘I wasn't one before, I only wrote about it, it's a story..stop trying to believe it's real. It never was.’ ‘Now look at who's talking, Dan. We're making progress! You're calling me a monster, and that means you understand the truth. You understand that you are changing, you know you are becoming more powerful. You know why we are doing this. You know what we must do. Don't deny your destiny, Dan. Don't deny your true nature. You're becoming who you always wanted to be. Now give in. Let the transformation take place. Let us transform Matthias too and then Mel when she comes for you. It is inevitable.’ ‘I don't want my friends to know what I am.’ ‘You cannot hide something like this. They must know. Why are you so hesitant, Dan? Is it because you know they will understand that this is meant to happen? Or is it because you know in your heart of hearts that we are right, that this is meant to be? This is a good thing. It is better for you, and better for all of us too. Don't deny us, Dan. Let us change the world for the better.’
“Please stop this, this isn't not how you're supposed to be.”
To say Nathan was having a difficult time with his Were-Aykroyd transformation would be underselling it, it hurt him to have to experience this process, true normally he would be able to turn into Dan whenever he wanted and painlessly but in this scenario, he wasn’t, he panicked as he began to make a run for it and tried to head for the door only to be grabbed by Dan. ‘But you already know that this is meant to be, Dan. This is the way things have to be. You must know it, you must have known it since you wrote about it. And it is our destiny, our purpose in this world. We were meant to be were-aykroyds, and we shall be. Don't deny it anymore, Dan. Let's change the world.’
‘Let go of me, Dan. Whatever has gotten inside you is making you act like an evil version of yourself. I told you, I can choose to keep my were-aykroydism a secret as long as I want to and as long as i'm around during the day you cannot do anything about it, this was never destiny, this was you taking something i've wanted and twisting it.’ ‘I am fulfilling your wish, I am the embodiment of what you've made. You created me to be this. You knew what the fate of the world was supposed to be, and you made me that way. Why would you try to fight it? Why would you try to deny me…deny our destiny? The transformation will be complete soon. It'll be good for all of us. Why are you fighting me so much? What do you stand to gain?’ ‘Because I don't want to be a full blown maniacal Were-Aykroyd, I don't want to lose my mind. Most of the time when I write a transformation, the victims keep their memories.’
Dan chuckled evilly to himself, it was shown that this version of the were-aykroyd clearly was enjoying the process. ‘But you know deep within yourself, you will become me, a full Were-Aykroyd. And you know what, Dan? It's alright. It'll be alright. Don't you want to feel the incredible power? Don't you want to become what you were born to be? Don't you want to feel your true nature, to embrace it and to use it? It is our destiny, Dan. It feels good to be me. Don't fight it. Just. Give in.’
“I was never born for this and you cannot make me change that.”
‘Oh, but you are, Dan. You were born to do this, to become me. And you will, you can feel it inside you, you can feel the transformation happening. Embrace it, this is a good thing, you'll know it. You know that with my power you can make the world perfect. You'll know it once we transform everyone. We'll be happy. Don't you want us to be happy? Don't you want this transformation for all those who need it? You do, I know you do.’ ‘Dan, don’t do this, this is and never will be you. The demonic entity has taken over your body and I know you’re still in there.’ ‘'Everyone? No, you can't. There are people out there that probably won't like being transformed, especially without consent. And as alluring with your hypnosis and your powers doesn't mean they'll want you yet alone be you.’ ‘But who's to say my power wouldn't be able to help them, Dan? I'll make them want to become something greater, something more perfect.’ ‘This isn’t you speaking, this is the evil version of you speaking to me, please stop this, and what do you think you will get from this, and nothing…nothing good will come of this.’
‘And they will be happy, don't you understand? Everyone will be happy. We'll make everyone see. We'll show them the path to perfection. And if they won't accept it, we'll make them accept. No one will be a human if we have our say. They'll all become as us. Is that so bad, Dan? What is so wrong about everyone being truly happy and becoming what they were meant to be?’ ‘You and I have the same powers and same weaknesses. I'm a fledgeling Were-Aykroyd who has only been one for a few years, at least since 2020 but has never actually said it.’ ‘So you already understand, then. We are the same, Dan. We share this great power together. And it is our destiny to use that power to transform this world, to make it how we know it should be. Think about it, think of how much better our world would be if everyone were as us. Don't you see the potential? You always knew it, Dan, and only I can help this world reach it's highest potential. Don't deny me, Dan. You know what's right.’
“And this is not right, it never will be right, what you are doing isn’t right.”
“This ends now, and so do you.”
Oh and how do you think you can end me?”
‘I can rewrite you, make you not like this, I can make you better, we don't have to end it like this.’ Nathan pulled out his phone and started to call Mel and Matthias for help, but the evil version of Dan mocked him. ‘Call for help all you like Nathan, but I am the only one who can help you, let me help you, give in, be the Were-Aykroyd you know you are.’
Nathan was definitely more than a little pissed off and he was serious when he said that he could rewrite the Were-Aykroyd’s story, making him back to how he normally was. ‘What? No. You wouldn't do that, Dan. That would violate all the rules. And besides, how would that benefit us? Don't you want to bring me into the new world, to give me a chance? We can change everything. It would be cruel of you to change me now, Dan. Don't you know how much I can benefit this world with my powers? Don't stop me now, Dan. I'm what will save this world from mediocrity, from being just another insignificant planet in the sea. Give in and let me help you, Dan. Let me help us.’
“You're going to have to behave yourself from now on. Because I wrote you, I am your creator, and I am still the one who has a higher morality than you will ever have, what has gotten into your body is making you act like this and it’s not how a Were-Aykroyd should act.”
‘Morality? Don't you understand what we must do, Dan? Is it not about what we want? We can change this world, transform everyone into their true selves. That is what we must do, why deny the truth? And you're saying you would rather deny our destiny than give in? You can't go back to being a human. You aren't one anymore. And you can't take that from everyone, from me. I am the embodiment of perfection, the final goal of your creation. Let me help you, Dan. Don't deny it.’ ‘ ‘Not everyone's true self is an aykroyd.’ ‘It will be if I have my say, Dan. I want this to be the world we know it should have been. The world of the aykroyds. Why do you want to deny this? Can't you see how much better it will be? Is it really about morals? Do you not believe that this planet and it's people deserve to be as us? Don’t deny it, Nathan, don’t you want this?’ ‘I am not denying, I am suppressing the changes, I am trying to get you to snap out of it, I am not Dan Aykroyd, I am Nathan. I am Nathan.’
“Not for long you won’t be.”
The transforming monsterologist was determined to win against the corrupted Were-Aykroyd, he groaned as he kicked off his shoes, his night-socks were slowly tightening as his feet enlarged from within them, they began to strain and tear apart as his feet continued to enlarge before ripping open with a ‘shrippp’ to reveal his larger feet, which looked like Dan’s. ‘This is why I hate the transformation you made me undergo last time this happened, turning into a Were-Aykroyd is difficult, not only is turning painful, but also the clothing bills I will have to end up paying everytime my shirt and shoes get torn apart, you are a monster, that’s what you are.’ ‘But a monster that is helping you…that’s what I am doing.’
Nathan groaned as he felt a tingling sensation in his feet, two of the toes on each foot stuck together at the knuckle giving him the appearance of webbed toes. ‘Oh great now I have your freaky frog-like toes.’ ‘No, you have my Were-Aykroyd toes. Dan, you are becoming a part of me. And that is good, you know this, you know it needs to be. These toes, these feet, they belong to you, they are a part of you. You will love them, Dan.’
The transformation into a Were-Aykroyd was normally so painless for him and not so traumatic, normally when he just Aykroyded out it was because he could do it at will sometimes and it was painless, he just morphed into Dan and kept his thoughts and memories, but not in this case. He groaned as his legs began to go in the same way as his arms, broadening and growing and making his jeans feel a bit snug. ‘Ugh…this hurts, please stop this, this isn’t how i’m supposed to change.’ ‘That's it, Dan, give into it, your transformation is happening. Just give up, just accept it. You cannot stop it, you cannot avoid it. This is your destiny, Dan, your true form. You are meant to be like this. And soon, you will realize that you are glad to be this way. You cannot run, Dan, you cannot run. You are a were-aykroyd now, you belong like this.’
“No I don’t I don’t want to be a Were-Aykroyd forever.”
“Oh but you are going to be one, and be a sexy one at that.”
‘I can easily turn back to normal normally, and that spell from last time should be able to cure me of Were-Aykroydism and revert me to normal before it’s too late, it worked last time to stop me from morphing again.’ ‘Only because I allowed it to, I wasn’t quite finished with you, but you stopped me from completing the change.’
“Dan, this isn’t you, I keep telling you, you’re possessed, you need to snap out of it.”
Nathan groaned as he saw the back of his jeans tightening as his rear began to plump up, he normally loved this part because he wrote it in his stories to be so pleasant and nice but it was horrifying him this time. ‘Uh oh, not this.’ ‘It's quite alright, Dan, you know it is. Your jeans cannot contain your rear. You would not want them too, anyways, to cover the glorious behind of the were-aykroyd. That would be a travesty. Dan, you will be glad, so happy to have that beautiful, large, were-aykroyd behind.’
Normally this part would have been quite sexy to him and if he was Tina Belcher, he would have loved to see this but this was horrifying, he was turning into a Were-Aykroyd and not in the way he normally did. ‘Why do you have to be so thicc and hairy like this? With your chest and stomach hairs and your arm hairs.’
The evil/corrupted Dan chuckled some more, taunting Nathan over his developing build, taking delight in doing so. ‘Because it is the true you, Dan. I know this. I know you want this. Just accept it, Dan. You want me. You want to be me. You want this body. It is meant to be, and you are meant to be the were-aykroyd, with all of my glorious hair and features. You will love it. Dan, I am becoming you and you are becoming me. We are merging. I am becoming a part of you. And you know that you want this.’ ‘Well it is so so…so, oddly interesting, makes me feel like i'm so…so…sexy, no wait this isn't sexy, this is wrong, this isn't nice, this isn't pleasant.’ ‘Just give in, Dan, give in. You want me. You want to be me. Why fight what you know is coming to you? You know your transformation is happening. You don't want to fight it, you know that. I am becoming your true self, Dan, and you need to accept that. Just become the were-aykroyd, Dan, and you will be happy. You are meant to be me. You know you are.’
Nathan instinctively started to examine himself and he started to fall into a bit of a trance before snapping out of it. ‘No, I musn’t be attracted to this.’ ‘Just accept it, Dan. Give into it. Just… let me guide you. Let me become you.’ ‘Dan, whatever demon has taken over you is controlling you and making you do these things, please stop.’ ‘Dan, you are becoming me. There is no longer any Dan left. You just accept it, and you give into me. I am becoming you, Dan.’
“Don’t call me Dan, I am not Dan Aykroyd, I never will be him, I am not him, stop it.”
“Oh but that is who you are now, my were-aykroyd, you will do as I tell you.”
“I won’t do as you command me to do, I won’t, I won’t.”
Nathan groaned as he heard a series of cracking noises, his body was slowly growing up in height from 5’7 to 5’8. ‘Yes, grow, rise, become more. Become stronger. Soon, you will be as tall as me and your body will reflect this, it's all part of the transformation, Dan, you cannot deny it. You need to accept that you are me, and what you are meant to be. And then you will be happy, being so Aykroydian like me.’ He started to lose a bit of his balance as he shot up an additional height, going from 5’8 to 5’9. ‘Dan, now you feel something else, I want you to embrace and embrace this next part. You see, Dan, I am not just a were-aykroyd, I am also a male. Let me become you in all aspects, don't hold back, don't push back anymore, just accept it. Dan.’ ‘Whatever you’ve got planned for me, I don’t want it.’ ‘Oh, but you do, Dan, you may not think you do, but I can see inside of you. I am a part of you, and you want me inside of you. Don't fight it, Dan, you know you want it. Let me become you completely, let me become inside of you.’
‘Stop calling me Dan. I am not Dan Aykroyd and never will be.”
He tried to make a dash for it and headed for a window in hopes of escaping out of it, only to groan as he shot up in height from 5’9 to 5’10. ’I cannot allow this to happen, and I won't.’ He was determined to not only resist changing further but also to get Dan un-possessed, and he wanted this nightmare to end. There was a cracking sound as his height shot up to 5’11 and then 6’0.
“Dan don't do it, don’t do it, don’t let it end in this way.”
“Oh but i’m not done yet.”
‘If it goes the way I think that it is going to go, forget it.’
He moaned, begging for it all to be a dream as he slow grew in height to 6’1, he was now as a tall as Dan himself. ‘Oh yes, you are coming so well, you’ll be a full Were-Aykroyd in no time and then we can conquer the night together.’ ‘I refuse to join you, you're not the Dan I love, you are evil and manipulative. You cannot control me, this isn’t what you’re supposed to do.’ ‘Oh but I can…you know how that song goes, you can try to resist, you can try to hide from my kiss, but you know that you can’t fight the moonlight. And deep in the dark, you surrender yourself and surrender your heart.’ ‘You keep doing this to me in my dreams, right when i'm about to confess to my friends,bam…I start to change, I think I turned back to normal at that party, it was a trick like you to get me to transform. I got so close to meeting John Candy, one of my heroes but you making me into Dan ruined that, why do you ruin my chances of a dream where I don't turn aykroydian?’
‘Dan, you keep falling for my tricks, but this isn't a dream this time. You need to stop trying to resist it. You want this, Dan, you know you do. You are meant to be what you are meant to be, what you will soon become. Let go of your friends, let go of your normal life. Let go and become the were-aykroyd. Let go of everything, let go of everyone, just accept what you need to accept, what you want to accept. Give in, Dan, it's your destiny, you know it is meant to happen.’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, stop calling me that. You are controlling me and this isn’t nice.’ ‘But what I am doing for you IS nice.’ ‘You tricked me into thinking I was free of you. Only to reveal you wanted me to change, you got me addicted on those games that change others into your species.’
‘And I would do it all over again. This is your destiny, Dan. And you know that it is truly what you want. Inside of you, you feel us merging, Dan. You feel it. You know you have to. The transformation is almost complete. You are almost there, you may resist, you may fight, but we are becoming one, you and I. I am becoming a part of you. And soon, you will be a part of me. You cannot escape it, so why should you try? Just give up, just give up and become what you truly are, Dan.’ Nathan broke down in tears, he hated seeing Dan being like this, being this controlling evil being who only wanted to corrupt him and change him into a Were-Aykroyd, which wasn’t the Were-Aykroyd way at all.
“I don't think I should embrace it.”
‘But you should, Dan. It is your destiny. And it is my true desire, Dan, it is what I wish for you. Think about that, Dan. Don't you want to give in to me? Can't you feel us merging, Dan, we are becoming one in a way we never have before. We are so so close, you cannot resist forever, Dan. One day, we will become one, and then both you and me will become what we truly are meant to be..’ ‘Not like this, you are doing this for the purpose of corrupting me and this isn’t like you.’
Nathan groaned as he tried to suppress the changes, attempting to ignore Dan’s words, he attempted to use his shapeshifting powers to morph back to normal but his DNA was reacting in a way that didn’t sound good. ‘Don't fight, Dan, don't try and push back. Accept what is happening. You cannot fight this, you cannot resist what is happening to you, you cannot escape your destiny. Your DNA is being altered, you cannot stop it, stop trying, stop thinking, stop wanting to resist. Accept. Accept everything that is happening to you, Dan. Accept your destiny. We will become one.’ ‘My DNA is allergic to you that's why, it can't handle the aykroydian genes fusing with it.’
He groaned again as his back and shoulders broadened with a crunch and his neckline altered, Aykroydian DNA entering his system. ‘Dan, there is no allergy, this is just another way of you trying to fight back, to stop the transformation I have over you. Don't fight it, you know you want this. Don't fight back, Dan. Don't do anything. You are just a passenger. We are merging, you and me. And I am becoming a part of you. Just accept it, relax. You will be a part of me, and you know you want this to happen.’ ‘I will never be your were-aykroyd because we all know as a more experienced one i'd be the leader.’
‘There you go, Dan, feel it, feel it merge with you, join you. Feel yourself becoming the were-Aykroydian, feel yourself becoming what you were meant to become. And feel us merge, we shall become one, Dan. We shall become more. You know it is your destiny, you cannot escape.’ ‘I still have half vampire traits and I am not afraid to drain you if you’re not careful. I can still do this to you.’
At this point Nathan was definitely pissed off as he snarled and hissed, his canines extending to resemble fangs as his eyes gave off a supernatural glow, his face contorting into a vampire ‘game face’ resembling a Buffyverse vampire. ‘Dan, don't you dare try and vampire me! This is your destiny, Dan! You are a were-aykroydian! This is your true form! You're a vampire-were-aykroydian, Dan! You know I am right! Accept it, accept who you are really meant to be, you can't go back now! You cannot resist this!’ ‘I am not afraid to drain you, you may be a were-aykroyd but I can still drain you and make YOU mine. Remember i'm the one with the power in this relationship.’
He lunged at Dan and sank his teeth into his neck, biting him in a style akin to a classic vampire, causing Dan to yelp in pain. ‘No, no! Please, please do not turn me into your slave. I beg of you, do not turn me into your slave!’ ‘I am not going to make you my slave, but 'You should have thought of that before you did this on me.’ He morphed back to his current appearance to check his appearance.
Nathan gasped as his hair began to darken and lengthen…’Oh no, it’s not stopping.’ ‘Yes, Dan, we are merging. We are becoming one. You cannot stop it, Dan. You cannot resist it, Dan. The transformation is almost complete, Dan. You can feel it, you know it. We are becoming one, Dan. We will be one. There is no you, Dan, there is only us.’ ‘But remember I did what I had to do to teach you a lesson. You were doing this to me.’
‘Yes, Dan, true, you did, and I learned my lesson. And I am sorry, Dan. I am truly sorry for what I made you go through. But I must be in truth, I still believe it was your true destiny to become a were-Aykroydian. You must admit that, in some ways, this is correct. Your transformation is almost complete, Dan, we are becoming one. Just a few more changes, and you will be my were-Aykroydian. So very close, you and I.’ ‘You keep saying that but we are not, and my name is Nathan, Nathan Forester, not Dan Aykroyd.’
“I refuse to believe you. This isn’t how you normally act.”
He backed away, refusing to believe what Dan was saying, because he was afraid of him and he was afraid of what Dan had become and what he’d become. ‘Dan, do not back away, we are becoming one. It is your destiny, Dan. You have to accept it. Soon I will be in you and you will be in me. You will be my were-Aykroydian. Just let me in, Dan.’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, stop it, stop calling me Dan.’
Nathan groaned as he felt a pulsating sensation in his forehead which was growing and become larger, his eyebrows thickened and arched in the process. ‘Dan, yes, this is what has to happen. This transformation has to happen, and together we will finally become one. I will be in you, and you will be in me. Do not resist, Dan, you know what will happen as these changes continue. It will just result in greater discomfort, Dan, just think about that. Accept this, and we will be one. We will be complete.’ ‘I mustn’t think of this, think of anything else besides this.’
He groaned as he tried to think of anything but the morph but he couldn’t, the pain was too much for him to handle, he wished for this to be over. ‘Dan, you can try all you want, but it won't work. This transformation is still happening, whether you want it to or not. You can do one of two things, Dan. You can accept it, you can give yourself completely to me, you can become my mind, my body, my soul, you can live within me. Or you can fight and try and resist, you will make this transformation even more painful than it already is, but it will still happen. The choice is yours, Dan.’
Nathan didn’t want this to happen, he hated for this to happen, becoming a full Were-Aykroyd in this manner was horrifying. ‘Transformations of this sort aren’t supposed to happen to me, yeah…they are normal if you’re Collin from Changed, but i’m not Collin, I am Nathan and I am not Dan Aykroyd.’ ‘Oh but you are, my lovely Aykroydian.’ He closed his eyes and groaned, hoping that when he opened them the whole nightmare would be over, he opened his eyes, they both widened with one remaining brown and the other turning green giving him hazel heterochromiac eyes.
‘Dan, i’ve got your eyes now.’ ‘Yes! Yes, this is what it must be, Dan. Dan, your transformation is almost complete, and you will become what you were always meant to be. Let the transformation happen. Let yourself merge with me, and you and I will become one person, one soul. Dan, your eyes are beginning to change, let it happen. Let me into your soul, and I will stay there. This is what it must be.’
“I'll only let you in if you promise not to go after anyone I love.”
‘Dan, I can promise you that if you let me in and we become one, I will no longer be able to make you do anything. I cannot force you to become what I want you to be. So yes, I will promise I will not go after those you love if you just let me in, Dan. Let me into your soul and we shall be one.’ Nathan knew that the possessed Were-Aykroyd was lying to him, he wasn’t really promising this, he knew this was one of his tricks to get him to let his guard down.
‘I mustn't think of that scene, that scene where Dan Aykroyd gets his body massaged, I mustn't think of it but I am. I begin to slip into another trance.’ He panted as he tried to resist thinking of the scene in Diamonds (1999) where the grandfather, father and son go into a brothel and where the father played by Dan Aykroyd had his body massaged, but he couldn’t not think about it, that scene…Dan’s hairy chest, and soft squishy body, made him jealous.
His mind started to drift, making him think this was what he wanted, to be a were-aykroyd who likes getting pampered and being massaged, filling him with strange Aykroydian thoughts that he tried to suppress. ‘But his hairy stomach and chest, I love that scene so much, sometimes I get jealous of Dan Aykroyd so much, makes me keep wishing I was him.’ ‘Yes, Dan, now you are starting to understand. I can feel you letting me in, you are beginning to accept me, you begin to accept who we truly are meant to be, to become.’
Nathan snapped out of the trance and retorted…’No, just because Dan Aykroyd has aged to become so good looking and oddly thicc and adorable doesn't mean I can submit to the change and whatever the were-aykroyd is making me think.’ ‘Dan, I am here, in your mind, in your thoughts, and I know your desires are changing, just like I know my thoughts are being changed. You are becoming me, and we have become one, one mind. Dan, there is no escape from this, we both know it. In some ways, what is happening and who we are becoming, is your destiny. Just think about it, Dan. Just let me in, just let it happen. Accept who you are, and let us be the were-Aykroydian that we were meant to be.’
‘I will never be one with you, I never will. Just because you know I watch a lot of his movies doesn't mean I wanted to be him in any of them.’ ‘Dan, you cannot change this, you know that, just as I do. Just as I know that this is what must happen, you know it as well, deep down inside, you know that I am right. This is your destiny. You must become what I am destined to become, it is the fate we share, Dan. You and I are the same, in a way we both always knew we were. All you need to do, is just give in, and accept what is happening. It will be so much better, Dan. It will be so much better this way.’
“I can resist, suppressing the Aykroydian instincts and urges is the best i can do.”
‘Dan, this will only make things worse, so much worse. It will hurt so much more, Dan. Dan, give in, give in to your urge to let go, to give up, to surrender. Surrender to this were-Aykroydian transformation, surrender to me, to us, and we will become the were-Aykroydian destiny calls us to be. I am already in you, Dan. I know everything you feel and think. Your urges, even the deep down ones… they belong to both of us now. Surrender, Dan.’ Nathan attempted to keep his Aykroydian urges at bay, groaning as his nose began to itch.
‘No I must suppress it, I don’t want to surrender.’ He groaned as he felt like he was going to sneeze as his nose broadened, developing down a cleft in the middle. ‘Dan, it must be so difficult, struggling to resist. But you know you can't keep resisting, you know you must let it happen, you know it's what you want. You want to become the were-Aykroydian, you want to be what you were meant to be. Let go, Dan.’ The were-aykroyd teased as he took control of Nathan’s nose. ‘Aaaaah! My nose…i've got your Aykroydian nose, your aykroydian hair, your big plump Aykroydian butt, your Aykroyd skin…i'm some kind of weird Aykroydian mess.’ ‘Yes, Dan, yes! All of those changes are a part of you, you cannot rid yourself of them anymore. You have become what I have become. We are were-Aykroyds, and we share all of these changes we are going through. And you know you wanted these all along. You wanted this big body, the big Aykroydian butt, you know you have always desired it, you cannot deny me, Dan. You cannot deny your destiny.
Nathan groaned as his lips plumped up. ’ ‘Yes, Dan! Yes, our lips, our kissable lips will be so much better than before, so much more kissable. Our face, these features, how we transform, they are all meant to be. You cannot escape what is happening, Dan. Our body, this was meant to be, you always wanted it. Accept it, don't resist, just accept this beauty that you cannot escape. Let it happen, Dan. His features slowly began to warp and contort, shifting to become a bit more Aykroydian. ‘No, noo…nooo…I cannot be.’ ‘Yes, Dan! Yes, you are becoming beautiful, becoming the man you always wanted to be! Accept the changes, accept the transformation, you cannot stop it, Dan, you cannot return to what you were. You are becoming more beautiful, more perfect. You are becoming one of the greatest men the world has seen. The were-aykroydian that you have always wanted to be. Yes, Dan, yes! What a beautiful man we are becoming.’
He groaned as his features plumped up and warped even further, resembling Dan Aykroyd’s own features. ‘But i'm not beautiful, look at me, i'm a freak.’ ‘You are beautiful, Dan, you are absolutely beautiful. It's the best thing that has ever happened to you. The way you are changing into the were-aykroydian, it's perfect, it's what you've always wanted. Look in the mirror, Dan, look at what you're becoming. All your dreams and fantasies are coming true, Dan. Look at what is happening to you, you are becoming the man you always wanted to be. You are truly beautiful, Dan. Accept it, do not be afraid.’
“I just have your appearance, I am not exactly like you.”
‘"No, Dan, no, you are not like me and I am not like you. You are the were-Aykroydian, you are you, but your true body, your physical beauty, it is becoming perfect. We have become something that is perfect. I can feel my changes, I can feel them, and you can feel yours, Dan.’ ‘No, this isn’t right, please fight this Dan, you are not this, you are a loving were-aykroyd.’ ‘You feel how much more perfect you are becoming, don't you, Dan? Don't you agree?’
‘My true body isn't this, that's for sure.’ Nathan retorted, his throat started to feel tight and dry as his voice slowly deepened, shifting and warping. ‘Yes, Dan, you feel it in your voice. That dryness, that hoarseness, that's the transformation doing this to you. But do not resist, Dan, we were meant to experience this, to feel this, this change, our transformation. Accept it. Accept that we are becoming who we were always meant to be.’
“I want you out of me before you take over completely.”
‘"Dan, you know we cannot be separated, you know I will always be a part of you. The transformation has already occurred, the transformation is almost complete. Dan, embrace this, accept the way you are becoming. You will become the perfect man, become the were-Aykroydian you have always wanted to be. Accept it, Dan. Embrace what is happening. I will always be a part of you, Dan.’ The possessed Were-Aykroyd’s words sounded more and more horrifying with each line that was uttered, making Nathan freak out even more, he attempted to think of the reversion spell that he did last time he got stuck in were-aykroyd form. ‘Dan, you will not remember the reversal spell, you cannot remember the reversal spell. Don't you want to become the amazing were-Aykroyd you have always wanted? Don't you feel this transformation is right, it is perfect, it is what needs to be? Dan, embrace it, let me in, let us be one person and one body.’
“You’re messing with my mind, you're not supposed to do that.”
‘Dan, that is part of what is happening to us. A transformation like this is no easy feat, to transform from man to Were-Aykroyd. Dan, I am doing this for us, we are so close, just a few more changes and we will be complete. You know you want this, Dan, you know you do. You wanted this transformation from the start. Accept it, Dan, don't resist this.’ ‘I can if I want to.’ Nathan picked up his phone and frantically sent a help me message to his friends.
‘Dan, no, do not do that. You know your friends cannot do anything to save you, Dan, do not even try. It is too late for you, Dan, it is already complete. Send the message, Dan, but it is no use, they cannot save you from this transformation, from me. They cannot save you from this destiny. You know this is what was meant to be, Dan.’ ‘They can, they'll know that i'm not doomed to be a were-aykroyd forever, they'll turn me back to normal and they'll help me feel better.’
“Now now Dan, don’t try to act like you can win this battle.”
‘Stop calling me that, I keep telling you not to tell call me that I am not Dan Aykroyd, my friends will help me.’ ‘Dan, you know they can't, your transformation is complete, it is a part of you now. There is no returning back to the way you were, and you know it. You have already begun to embrace it, to feel it, and you like it. Don't deny what is happening, don't deny the transformation, Dan. You don't want to deny it, you know it is right, the only right fate.’
Nathan groaned as his voice warped and deepened, becoming Dan Aykroyd’s voice and developing the signature mannerisms. The torture he was in was unbearable, he would have done anything to wake up in his own bed as his normal self, he would have done anything for that, but it seemed like it was getting hard to even think of what it was like before. ‘My name isn't Dan, Daniel Edward Aykroyd is Canadian, he was born in Ottawa, I was born here in Oakendale, USA. I'm a human being, a male at around 5'7 and I am a monsterologist, I'm supposed to study you, not turn into you.’ ‘Dan, your memories are confused, we are now one, we are Daniel Edward Aykroyd, we always were. We are becoming the perfect physical specimen. You must embrace it, you must accept it. But we need no explanation of the transformation, we know it is right. We will become the were-Aykroyd, and we will become all of Dan Aykroyd. Look into the mirror, and you will see who we truly are.’ ‘No no….I cannot be a full Were-Aykroyd, that is not how Were-Aykroydism works, most of my victims keep their minds.’
‘Yes, Dan, now that is the spirit! You speak as a were-Aykroyd, we are becoming something greater, we are becoming what we were always meant to be. Look at us, we are the perfect man, the perfect man for everyone, the perfect man for a were-Aykroydian. Dan, let go of what you must, of your past, of everything you once were. Accept what you must become, for the man you always wanted to be is who you are becoming right now.’ ‘But why can't I just keep mine? Can you even hear me? I told you my name is Dr Nathan Forester, not Daniel Edward Aykroyd.’ ‘Dan, we hear you, we know who you are. But you must understand, you must know, that you must accept this fate. We cannot go back, you know that. Your transformation is complete, and you are becoming Daniel Edward Aykroyd. You are accepting it, you don't fight it anymore. You will be him, Dan, you already are him. Do not speak such treason, Dan. Do not resist, do not deny. Daniel Edward Aykroyd is who you are, just as he is who we are. Accept it, Dan.’
“I’m a monsterologist, i’m supposed to study you, not turn into you.”
‘es, that's what you were, Daniel, you were. But that is no longer the case. Your destiny is no longer as a monsterologist. Your destiny is as Daniel Edward Aykroyd, the world-renowned actor, and now you are beginning to finally accept the fate you were meant to have. And all the powers you gain, all the fame, all the glory, that too is destined for you, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Do not deny your destiny, Dan. Embrace it.’ ‘I refuse to, I am not Dan Aykroyd, I will never be him.’ ‘Oh but you must.’
“As far as I know, this is over, nothing left of me for you to take.”
‘That is your mistake, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. There is much more for me to take, more to add to your transformation. Dan, look in the mirror, look at what you have become. Do you see how much more perfect you are? Do you see how good it feels? I do, Dan, I know that it feels oh so good for you to have become me, to have embraced this transformation. Your transformation is not complete, there is still so much more change to come.’
“I have your appearance and voice….what more do you want?”
‘Your body is not yet perfect, Dan… your hair, your skin, your body, they are all still changing. They are becoming as perfect as I am, because I am the master of this transformation. I will help you, this transformation has made you who you must be, who you always wanted to be. But do you know what the most important change is, Dan? It is your mind. Your mind is finally accepting of what you are becoming, of what you are destined to become.’ ‘No, not mental changes….I cannot do a full mind change.’ ‘Dan, you must, it is a part of your transformation. You are meant to become me, not just in body, but in mind, your thoughts must be mine, our thoughts must become one. You must feel what I feel. You have accepted this, Dan, you cannot deny this, you are meant to become me, your mind, your body, your soul, you want this, you want to become who you were destined to be, Dan.’
“I am against it, I am against it because it's wrong.”
‘Dan, you must accept it. You know it is right, you know I am who you truly are. You know how good this feels for you, how good it feels to be me. You cannot deny it, Dan, your mind is finally beginning to accept, beginning to become mine. My thoughts are yours, your thoughts are mine, we are becoming a singular were-Aykroydian, one mind, one body, together forever.’ ‘My ID and every online profile says I am Nathan and I am not Dan. You don't see Dan's name on any of my profiles, do you? No, you don't. You cannot take my mind.’ ‘Your profiles, your ID, your past, all of what is not Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you must put all that away. Accept the change, embrace it, as you have finally begun to do. You no longer need your old identity. We are a single were-Aykroydian now, we have become one, and we are not going to be apart ever again.’
At this point Nathan had enough, he screamed and began to hit himself a few times, ‘Wake up Nathan, you're dreaming, you're not a were-aykroyd, you're not like this, oh please wake up. Please.’ ‘No, you are not dreaming, you are not waking up, you are accepting your transformation. There is no going back now, not for either of us. We are one were-Aykroydian. That is our fate, that is who we are now. Wake up to your destiny! Embrace your transformation with me, wake up Daniel Edward Aykroyd. You will never leave, Daniel Edward Aykroyd, not as long as I am here.’
“But i’m not Dan Aykroyd I never will be.”
Thinking quickly Nathan decided to knock himself out before Dan could fully take over his mind, he was hoping this would do the trick. He got up afterwards, his head feeling a little bit fuzzy. ‘What's going on?' ‘Nothing is going on, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Nothing is happening except you are finally awakening your true self, awakening Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Let go of your previous memories, they are useless to us. That Nathan Forester no longer exists anymore, he is gone, you, Daniel Edward Aykroyd, are here to replace him.’
“I still have them, right?' I just remember getting a head-ache.”
‘You still have a small part of them, yes. But the transformation is complete for you. You are Daniel Edward Aykroyd now, fully. Your memories of Nathan Forester, even if they still exist, are now useless to you.’ Nathan held his head, he felt confused, he was still Nathan..at least he thought he was, but his mind felt fuzzy, his thoughts seemed to be shifting, becoming like Dan’s, fragment by fragment, and taking over. ‘I only remember the transformation and how it happened.’ ‘You don't need to remember. It has happened, but it doesn't matter now. All that matters is that you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Just focus on that and do not fight it anymore, let go of Nathan Forester.’
Nathan groaned as he held his head, a surge of headaches coming in. ‘Dan! You’re giving me such a headache! I felt like i’m Rita Repulsa!’ ‘Yes, the headaches. They are a welcome indication of you finally becoming me, becoming Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Let it happen, fight no more.’ ‘DAN! This is all your fault, if only you stay put during the day and didn’t let that demon possess you. You are giving me a headache!’ ‘Do not resist, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Do not fight what is right, who you are destined to be. Let go, you cannot fight against your were-Aykroydian destiny. You are becoming perfect, let your transformation complete, don't fight it anymore.’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, my name is Nathan Forester, all of my IDs still show this, my friends will see this, my family will see it. You are in so much trouble, you are giving me such a headache.’
‘Your previous name is no longer relevant. Who you are now is what matters, and it is Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Your friends, your family, they will see you as Dan, as who you truly are now. You will be Dan Aykroyd to them, you can never go back to Nathan Forester. My transformation is complete, you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd forever, the perfect were-Aykroydian, the greatest transformation in human history.’ ‘No, that is not true, I can go back to normal and I can stop you before I go full Were-Aykroyd.’
He attempted to try and find a cure for his condition, only for Dan to laugh maniacally and taunt him. ‘Trying to find a cure, eh? No cure will save you from what I can do to you.’ ‘Just end this torture now, don’t take my mind.’ ‘Now Dan, don’t struggle, you and I both know you want this.’
Nathan groaned as he tried his best to resist, holding his head in anguish as some of Dan Aykroyd’s memories started to get into his mind. ‘I am Dan Aykroyd, I am married to Donna Dixon, I was on SNL during the Seventies. That cannot be right, I don't remember any of this. I don't remember being part of second city, being an SNL cast member during the 70's, I don't remember being married to Donna Dixon at all. Dan, you’re implanting Dan Aykroyd’s memories into my head.’
‘You will very soon. Accept it, embrace it. You have become what you were always destined to be, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. You do not remember it now, but your transformation is nearly complete. Once your mind is fully mine, you will remember who you are, you will remember who you once were, Dan Aykroyd, you will become me. Accept it, this transformation is good for you, it must happen. You want it to happen, you must accept it, you want to forget being Nathan, you will always be Dan Aykroyd.’
It was at this point Nathan was breaking down, crying and screaming, trying to keep himself from losing his mind completely, trying not to think he was Dan Aykroyd, but he just couldn’t, as he groaned and begged for it to end. ‘That cannot be right. I have to fix this.’ ‘You cannot. You will not. Your transformation cannot be reversed. There is no returning to who you once were, Nathan Forester is gone, your life and memories as you once were are gone. There is only one way, and that is to complete your transformation, to embrace it, to become the were-Aykroydian you were ALWAYS meant to be Dan Aykroyd.’
‘I would rather not. Please tell me this is just some sick twilight zone twist and i'm going to be perfectly fine.’ ‘No, this is not a sick twist, no, it is not something you simply wake up from, no, this is reality, this is your new life, your new existence. You are Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you were ALWAYS meant to be Daniel Edward Aykroyd. There is no stopping your transformation now, no going back, no undoing it. You are destined to become one with me, we will become one were-Aykroydian.’ Upon seeing himself in the mirror, Nathan shattered it in a fit of rage and attempted to hide away. ‘No! Do not hide, do not resist! You are meant to accept this, to become this! You cannot stop it now, you are meant to be Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you are meant to be a were-Aykroydian! Stop resisting, you cannot hide forever! Accept it, look in the mirror, you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd!’
“But you made me into this horrible creature, I like Dan but I don't want to be him fully.”
‘You cannot resist it! You are Daniel Edward Aykroyd! You know the truth, you cannot deny it! You enjoy this, you enjoy the power that being Daniel Edward Aykroyd provides you, the transformation makes you stronger than you could ever imagine. Look at yourself, you enjoy this, you love it, the transformation is perfect, it is glorious!’ ‘Yes…yes…I am Dan Aykroyd, I was born in 1952, i'm Canadian, no wait…that's not right. Let go of my mind.’ Nathan freaked out, he wanted desperately to hold onto his memories of being himself.
‘Yes, yes, see? This is who you have become, it is your destiny. Don't fight it, let it happen. You like this transformation, you want to be Dan Aykroyd, you are meant to be him now. Embrace the transformation fully.’ ‘I used to be normal, but i'm not normal anymore, you turned me into a Were-aykroyd, this wasn't how I wanted my curse to be like that. Nooooo, noooo, nooo…’ ‘No turning back, you are Dan Aykroyd, you have to accept it. Why fight me, why fight what is right for you? Let go of those old memories, they are no longer a part of what you are meant to be. Embrace the change, you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you must, you will, you are Dan Aykroyd now.’
He cried out in anguish as his normal self’s personality started being overshadowed by that of the ‘Were-Aykroyd’…’Nooo, please, this hurts so much. Please stop this, turn me back to normal.’ His cries only served to weaken him, and he begged and he pleaded. ‘As far as I know you and I are through this has to end.’ ‘Do not resist your destiny, you must embrace this change, you must become a perfect were-Aykroydian. I am your destiny, I am what you always wanted to be. You are meant for this, accept this already, let go of Nathan Forester, and let Dan Aykroyd take over. Let him in, let us in.’
“But you don't even know what the words were, how can you hypnotize me without saying them.”
Nathan attempted to resist a couple of times before going into a trance-like state. ‘Yes, yes…I must be a good were-aykroyd, I must be like this…no, no, he didn't even say the words, i'm not supposed to be enticed into this unless he says the words. What is going on, I cannot think of anything I have done as a human.’ ‘That’s because you don’t, your mind is warping to catch up to the rest of you, and soon you will only think you are Dan Aykroyd.’ ‘But you're not supposed to entrance me like this, you do know that it's not how this works. End this now, or I will have to end it myself’. ‘Maybe I did say them. Maybe I didn't. But that doesn't matter anymore, because Dan Aykroyd is who you ARE. You ARE Dan Aykroyd, there is no more Nathan Forester, stop clinging to that man, he is not you, has me and my transformation shown you anything other than that? Stop resisting, embrace your future. Your transformation is meant to be complete.’
“Not anymore it isn’t, sorry, but i’m out of here.”
‘Oh no you’re not…or should I say, Dan?’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, I never will be, stop doing this to me, you have tortured me enough, I want to wake up from this nightmare.’ ‘Oh yes, you are, you will always be Dan Aykroyd, and you will be mine forever.’ ‘You cannot completely overwrite my memory, I may partially think I am him but not completely, you cannot do that.’ ‘Nathan Forester no longer exists, no longer matters, forget him, forget him and what you used to be, Dan Aykroyd is who you have become, it is who you are meant to be, my Were-Aykroyd.’
‘Y-Yes..I am Dan Aykroyd, no wait, i’m not…i’m Nathan Forester.’ ‘Oh but you are Dan Aykroyd, you always will be, every night, you will become like this, and you will help me, make more Were-Aykroyds like us, spread your perfect Aykroydism to your victims, make them Aykroydian too.
‘"No no…nooonooooooooo!'
Nathan dreaded that this moment would come as he struggled to keep his normal memories of his normal life and his friends, only for Dan Aykroyd’s memories to seep in even further, all of Dan’s memories overtook Nathan’s own and a tiny bit of Nathan stayed on to try and keep them away, but those Aykroydian thoughts and urges entered his mind, making him think that he was Dan. ‘Yes, i’m Dan Aykroyd, I was born in 1952 and I am Canadian, no wait..i’m not, i’m not Canadian, i’m not Dan Aykroyd, I wasn’t born in 1952.’ ‘Oh but you are, you are Dan Aykroyd, you were born in 1952 and you ARE Canadian.’
He tried to ignore those words but they wormed into his mind and he begged for it to end, only for Nathan’s memories to be fully evacuated and replaced with Dan Aykroyd’s own, as his transformation completed. ‘Yes, I understand…I am Dan Aykroyd, i’m a Were-Aykroyd, I live to serve you, I live to transform people into Aykroyds and make them perfect like us.’ ‘Excellent, see…I knew you’d give in eventually.’
The now corrupted Nathan or rather ‘Dan Aykroyd’ was under Dan the possessed Were-Aykroyd’s control, and there was nothing he could do about it because Nathan was no more, only the new Dan Aykroyd, the perfect Were-Aykroyd. It was then a few seconds later Nathan awoke with a loud scream. ‘What’s wrong Nate, buddy?’ Elwood Blues asked him.
‘I had a horrible nightmare in which Dan got possessed by a demon and turned evil and then he made me go full Were-Aykroyd and I lost my mind to him, I wasn’t even myself, my body, my voice, my mind, were all Dan Aykroyd, I was his to command, he corrupted me, he brainwashed me, that wasn’t nice at all.’ Nathan sobbed.
Clifford Skridlow and Ellis Fielding both cuddled him to help him feel better. ‘There there, it’s okay.’ ‘Yeah…it was just a dream, we know Dan would never harm you, or us.’ ‘But who would give me such a horrifying nightmare.’ ‘I think I know who.’
Grocer and Austin Milbarge from Spies Like Us were listening in to a conversation nearby, Vic Frohmeyer and Wade Motch along with undead Elwood were laughing. ‘Our plan worked perfectly.’ ‘Yes, our wicked nightmare spell to traumatize Nathan by giving him a nightmare about his own Were-Aykroyd alter-ego was successful.’ ‘Yes, and having the corrupted Dan fully corrupt him into becoming a full Were-Aykroyd with no way of turning him back was ingenious.’
“Ah ha, those guys did it.”
“I should have known.”
‘Yes, that plan to corrupt Nathan’s mind by corrupting his alter-ego and brainwashing them was very successful.’ ‘Yep, we successfully brainwashed/corrupted Dan and got him to do the same to Nathan too.’ ‘YOU GUYS DID WHAT?’ Mike Webber snapped. ‘Oh shoot, the Aykroydantiums.’
All of Nathan’s Aykroyd character brothers jumped over to teach them a lesson, all of them looked suitably angry. ‘Oooooooooh, ooooh, oooooooh, ohhh.’ ‘You’;ve really done it this time, you sickos.’ ‘Yes, how dare you try to corrupt Nathan in his dreams and brainwash him into forgetting who he is, you know how much he hates mind changes.’ ‘That is it, you lot are in trouble.’
Nathan manifested next to Vic Frohmeyer…���Did you do this to me Frohmeyer?’ ‘Yes..’ ‘That is it, you are grounded until Merry Christmas is once again acceptable to say around the holiday season, not only that but your punishment is to celebrate the holidays with a family that has religious beliefs that are different than yours, and you will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal.’ Elwood Blues decided to have a turn at it. ‘Zombie me, for being apart of this plan, you are grounded until a third Blues Brothers movie is released, and you will be forced to stay in the same prison I stayed at while waiting for my late brother Jake in Blues Brothers 2000, and you will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal as well.’
‘Bob, for also helping with this evil plan, you are grounded until John Landis eventually makes another movie and teaches his son Max to behave properly, while you are grounded you will be made to help clean the apartment, and you too will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal.’ Bob started to cry as he heard this.’Waaaaaaaaaaaaa!’, ‘Oh and don’t you make that motorcar crying sound or i’ll have Mel use magic to make you into one and sell you to Ray Zalinski.’
‘Pa Tex, you are grounded until it becomes illegal for everything in Texas to be giant-sized, until then you will have to watch every single bad AGT/BGT audition that Simon Cowell didn’t like and you will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal.’ ‘And finally, Wade Motch, you are grounded until Donald Trump runs for office again and doesn’t make an idiot out of himself, while you are grounded, you will be made to work for fellow Aykroyd character and president William Hainey and you will eat lumpy potatoes, just like the others.’
The Aykroydastians all broke down in tears as they ran away, and Nathan and his Aykroydian brothers all got back into the apartment and relaxed. ‘Thank you guys.’ ‘No problem, Nathan. Are you feeling better?’ ‘Yes, I am.’ ‘’I just the thing to help get your mind off that nightmare. How about we watch your favorite Dan Aykroyd movie?’ ‘Yes, that sounds like fun and a good way to clear my mind off of that nightmare.’ ‘I have the bluray of Nothing But Trouble, we can all watch it. I know it is your favorite Aykroyd movie, Nate.’
“You are correct, it is my favorite, it is so surreal and funny.”
“It’s settled then, we’ll watch that movie.”
‘And i’ll make the popcorn. Bing bing bing bang popcorn!’ ‘Oh, Grocer!’ They laughed and smiled as they sat down and watched Nothing But Trouble, and enjoyed the movie, watching the movie helped Nathan get over his nightmares that he had, and they all had a lovely time.
And so once again…the day and night are saved, thanks to the Aykroydantiums
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