#love him for taking the steps a lot of people of his time would have been afraid to

[gguk-n]

Hello there! Love your work on the Max Verstappen x reader fiction. If it isn't too much, can I request an angst based on the song " All I wanted was a coffee" by Samantha Ebert? You can decide the ending but, a gut wrenching angst with kelly is appreciated. Thank you!

I hope you like this, I tried to use the song in the way that I saw fit. The reader has many insecurities and bit of mommy issues. Mention of cuts and bleeding.

I wish you loved me

{Reader’s POV}

Max and I started dating soon after he got out of a really long relationship with his ex. With Max being a Formula One driver; the details of his past were general knowledge, did I wish I didn’t know? Yes. Because in the pictures of Max and Kelly, you could see his eyes sparkled and he would smile so bright sometimes and I felt like I never got to know that Max. But every relationship is different; I couldn’t compare it, could I?

Max was loving, I mean every boyfriend is. He would sometimes forget important stuff but he was a busy man with an even busier job.

But it hurt when I saw Max with P or Kelly for that matter. His eyes would light up; I just felt like crap every time he met them, but Max never noticed. At the end of the day, Max was always around P while she was growing up, it was a given she missed him, right?

It got worse when Kelly started coming to races and meeting Max. The worst was yet to come; the other girlfriends started to side eye me whenever me and Max would interacted as if Max was Kelly’s boyfriend.

I was in the bathroom when I heard them; they were talking about how Max and Kelly looked cute together, they were the model family, that Max deserved better. Kelly even talked about all the gifts he got her and P recently. I just sat there in the cubical for a very long time.

I waited, I was dumb I know but no one’s loved me before and the fact that Max was willing to love me even for a moment felt like relief. I didn't want to let him go, I could not when there was a chance he would come back.

I waited like always, Max was always away having dinner with P since she missed him. She missed him a lot ever since we started dating. I never said anything since Max was like her father figure but it hurt.

One of those nights, I was sat drinking whiskey, it was in Max’s alcohol cabinet. The bottle was almost over. The snacks dried up soon after the third glass. I was sat on the floor, glass in hand when Max walked in. “World’s best dad everyone” I sang. “How much did you drink?” He laughed. He laughed at me. “You know my mother was right” I said, trying to get up. “She wasn’t really the best mom, now was she” Max commented. “Yeah but she was right about a lot of things and she was right about how difficult to love I was” I laughed. Max looked at me with sadness in his eyes, “don’t pity me Max.... How could Kelly steal you from me?” I cried. Max said nothing. “No no sorry sorry, how can something be stolen from me when it was never mine to begin with.” I laughed bitterly taking the last swig from my glass. “The alcohol’s gone Max, just like your feelings for me or did you ever have them to begin with?” I slurred.

“Y/N I” Max began. “No Max, you’re not at fault. It’s my fault for coming between 2 lovers. You should’ve told me that you loved her, I would’ve never dated you” I cried for the first time tonight in front of Max. As I steadied myself, the whiskey bottle fell and broke, and I tried to pick up the pieces but ended up cutting myself. “Hehe look Max I’m bleeding” I giggled holding up my hand. “Y/N let’s clean that up” Max said trying to hold my hand. “NO, Kelly won’t like it. I’m not a home wrecker...or maybe I am” I laughed bitterly. “Let me help you” Max pleaded. “You look at me with so much concern for the first time since we started dating” I pointed out. Max’s eyes bore into mine. I tried to walk away but ended up stepping on the glass. “Look I’m bleeding from my foot now too. At least now people can see that I’m hurting since I’ll have bandages all over me. My heart ache gets missed every time, you know. Maybe now, they might see my hurt, for once” I said with fresh tears forming.

“Mothers are always right. I’m unlovable, always been. If only I was pretty, if only I was a model, if only I was thinner, if only I was….Kelly Piquet, then you would’ve loved me. But I’m me, I’m plain old difficult to love, Y/N that’s why I’m unlovable” I chuckled. “Let’s go to the hospital” he pleaded again. “No, I’ll take care of myself. Don’t worry about me anymore. I’ll be out of your hair before you know it. Then you can have your happy ever after with Kelly” I laughed bitterly. “Did you ever love me?” I asked. Max was quiet. “I was just a rebound wasn’t I. Tell me you really loved me even for a second” I begged. “I’m sorry.” He said.

I grabbed my phone with my other hand while bleeding on to the floor; “don’t worry. I’ll clean your place before I leave” I said looking at the trail of blood I was leaving and dialled my phone calling the only person I knew in Monaco, the only person who didn’t hate me or talk badly about me, Lewis. “Lewis, Hi....I need to go to the hospital. I’m bleeding” I giggled. “Are you drunk? How did you hurt your self? Where are you?” He asked concerned. “Yes, yes, home no wait, Max’s home” I answered. I heard him sigh. “Where Max?” He asked. “He’s here” I said looking up at Max. “Ask him to take you now?” Lewis suggested. “NO, we broke up, and ex-boyfriend’s don’t take their ex-girlfriend’s to the doctor” I explained. “What?” He asked shocked. “Please Lewis, it hurts. Can you come soon?” I asked. “I’ll be there soon” Lewis said and cut the call. I sat there and looked at Max, “The whiskey tasted sweet as always and you sobered me up so fast” I sighed looking at the mess I had made.

Lewis came to take me to the hospital; he did not speak to Max. I guess even he knew what was going on. I didn’t see Max again after that either.

[gremlinmodetweeker]

König's Kids Headcanons

I think König, when he's there, would be a great dad. He's a bit of a gremlin, but this just makes him a better dad. He's also a bit of a menace at parent teacher meetings.

Anyways, have some silly headcanons

Art from This Post

König is a surprisingly good father (when he’s there). He’s strict, but also knows how to relax and let things slide. He will play-wrestle with his kids and make sure they have plenty of time to run around in nature and read books. He’s passionate about his kids’ hobbies and encourages them to learn and explore what they love.

He’s the type of dad to teach them how to fight but also play pretend games with them

He does not like having tea parties, but he will endure for his children. He will endure great hardship and pain for them, and if this includes sipping water from a plastic teacup while sitting on a tiny stool, so be it. He can endure. However, he draws the line at makeup. He can’t endure (nor can he sit still long enough)

When König is home from work, he drops his military titles at the door and focuses entirely on being an important part of their lives. The sad part is that you can see he’s actively trying to make up for time he’s lost. This is part of what leads to him retiring early to a local security job.

Without a steady father figure in their lives, his kids do grow up to struggle with certain things. However, all things considered, they turn out pretty well adjusted and healthy. Honestly, pretty solid people. They turn out to be the kind of people you feel like you can respect and appreciate.

But when they’re young his kids are little shits. They’re the type to break stuff for fun. They also will run and hide from you. At a certain point, you’ll have to resort to using child leashes because they will run away from you in public. So when they’re young, they’re terrors in your house. When they get older, they have their father’s streak of intelligence and are snarky assholes. They have brutal teenage years.

This is exacerbated by the fact that for the first ten years of his youngest kid’s life, he’s still in a PMC and going on military contracts, so the kids have large periods of time where they’re missing their father.

König realizes too late that he missed a lot of his kids’ development and chooses to retire to a more local security job to spend more time at home. It’s a big change in the household, but not an unwelcome one. His older kids struggle the most, but they do grow to form strong bonds with him because of his choice to stay home

König makes a good deal of money early on so he can go on to take a lower paying job later in life. His kids never have to worry about if they have money. They have to worry about whether or not their parents will say yes.

König is a pretty strict father. He’s a military man, a former colonel. He’s not going to be a horrible abusive father, but he will be a bit much sometimes. You might find yourself stepping in to defuse the tension sometimes.

Thankfully, König doesn’t yell at his kids (unless it’s something stupid and it’s pretty obviously a joke) or hit them. He’s actually pretty bad about disciplining his kids. You might have to take over in that department. Having been in the military for so long, König’s terrified of going overkill on his kids and doesn’t want to risk hurting them. He can dish it out, yes, but he’s extremely cautious when doing so.

He’s also quite fair. He does his best to treat his children equally. He’s surprisingly good. He focuses on encouraging their individual hobbies and finding their own personalities. They do grow up to be quite self-confident with their father’s teachings in their heads. They’re not arrogant, but they’re confident and assertive

They’re not popular in school, but not hated. They do pretty decently. Academics are a bit too easy for them, so König has to step in to teach them study habits and keep their passion for learning. Thankfully, his father was a professor, so he’s pretty good at this.

That said, König will sometimes be pretty silly when disciplining. Sometimes, you can hear his full colonel voice booming from outside about someone pulling some silly prank on him as he’s mowing the lawn. He’s not the type to pull pranks on his kids (but he’ll happily torment you) but he will play silly games with them. I think his kids learn that when he’s yelling, he’s not actually that angry, he’s just playing around. It still scares the shit out of your kids’ friends when he does it when they’re over

König has a tendency to scare children in public. He tries really hard to not make them nervous, but with the hood and the height and the tired look in his eyes? Nah he’s terrifying.

König’s kids grow up not being afraid of anyone because nobody’s as scary as their dad. This also means all the kids know that those kids have the scariest dad.

When your kids’ friends come over, they’re terrified of König. Unfortunately, he finds this slightly funny and takes advantage of this. You might have to step in and diffuse the tension to help those poor children realize that when König is yelling about things, he’s not actually mad. Maybe make cookies with him or something, it’ll help break the ice.

Your kids and their friends are all taken under König’s wings for protection. He’ll go up to bat for any of those kids. He genuinely cares so much about them. Having very select few friendships as a child himself, he’ll go out of his way to ensure his children have healthy social lives.

Sometimes the parents are unsettled by him. This is König’s unsettling form of social anxiety at play, so you’ll have to mediate between other parents and König to make sure they realize that no, he’s not an abusive monster, he just makes horrible jokes about his children. He has very dark humor but plays it straight, which is a horrible combination.

He has had a teacher call CPS on him before, but it was quickly resolved. However, most people are frightened by König when he steps into a room and it’s no different at parent-teacher interviews

He always blows teachers out of the water for how much he cares about his kids getting a quality education. He’s also quite receptive to their advice (if it’s good) and is willing to step in when needed. Teachers also typically find that he’s quite a fun parent volunteer to have on field trips (he is extremely popular)

Some of the more timid kids grow to like König because he tries to ensure all children are included when he’s around. He’s good at making sure everyone feels noticed.

Of course, as said, in the beginning everyone is terrified of the giant foreign soldier man. His kids have to teach their friends to not be afraid of their dad when he’s home.

Later on, this means in late high school his kids' friends consider him a DILF. He’s horrified. Flattered, but horrified. He has a serious talk with you about how to not be a DILF. He genuinely is so upset by the concept. His kids laugh at him all the time because he’s miserable about it.

Konig Dump

Konig Headcanons

[multific]

Two Pieces of a Puzzle

Simon "Ghost Riley x Reader

Summary: You are sent on a mission with the infamous LT, but you might have just as many talents as he does, if not more.

When you found yourself on a mission with a military man, Lieutenant Ghost, you knew you were in for a treat. 

He was a tall, rugged man with an attitude and a sharp wit that kept you on your toes. 

As you set out on your mission, you were quick to realize that you were in for an adventure unlike any other.

The Lieutenant was a seasoned soldier, and his experience showed in every move he made. 

He led you with precision and confidence, never hesitating to make tough decisions or take risks when necessary. 

You found yourself in awe of his leadership skills and his ability to think quickly on his feet.

He was impressive, you weren't going to lie about that.

As you navigated through the treacherous terrain of the dense forest and faced unexpected challenges, Ghost remained calm and collected, always finding a way to overcome whatever obstacles stood in your way.

A rescue mission.

The children and wife of an important politician were kidnapped and you received intel that they were in a hidden house in the middle of a dense forest up in the mountains. 

Of course, your way to the forest was an entire mission on it's own, but you heard the tales of the infamous Ghost.

His determination was infectious, and you found yourself pushing harder and digging deeper than you ever thought possible.

Every second you spent with him, you felt your movements sharpen.

It was inspirational.

But it wasn't just Ghost's military prowess that impressed you. 

On no.

The mystery. 

The secrets he held inside himself.

The mask.

That damned mask.

He also had a wicked sense of humour that kept your spirits high even in the darkest of moments. His jokes and witty remarks never failed to bring a smile to your face, even when the situation seemed dire. 

His jokes, even if they were tired and mostly military-related, did help your mood a lot. 

Despite the dangers you faced and the odds stacked against you, Ghost never wavered in his commitment to completing the mission. 

His unwavering dedication inspired me to do the same, and together we forged ahead, determined to succeed no matter what.

You got to the house, just the two of you, hiding behind trees as you assessed the situation.

"You take the back door, I take the front." he said.

"With all due respect, Sir, I believe Captain was clear, you get me here, I get in and them out. I'm called Shadow for a reason." you smirked and put your gun down.

Your time to shine.

You were a specialist in kidnapping and hostage situations. They always got you as you were quiet on your feet and you always got to the point fast. 

You always rescued the person or people and no one ever saw you coming.

In the end, your mission was a success.

As always.

The happy family was back together as you and Ghost walked back into base.

"That was impressive." you heard him say.

"Thank you, Sir. I do live to impress." you said with a smile.

As you celebrated our victory, you couldn't help but feel grateful for the opportunity to work alongside such a remarkable man. 

And as you parted ways, you knew that you would always carry with you the lessons from your time together on that unforgettable mission.

Or so you thought.

You would say you were tipsy, others would call it drunk.

Ghost called it sexy.

You loved to see how his scary mask fell from his face. How his walls crumbled as you climbed into his lap and kissed him.

It was dark in the alley you followed him for a smoke.

He sat down on the steps and you followed suit.

"How did you do that? How did you get in and out without anyone seeing you?"

"The same way you got us through that block on the road or how you made me crawl on my stomach under a car so they wouldn't see us enter the woods. Skills, Sir. Years of training and skill."

It might have been your fault that you leaned in too close.

It might have been him when he looked at your lips. You weren't sure. But you were sure about one thing.

The way he kissed you spoke volumes.

He was touch starved and scared at the same time. 

But you did like the thrill of it.

And also because you were the same.

You two fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. 

Taglist: 

@castellandiangelo @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @manduse @jacalineiscomingforyou 

@mandoloriancookie @deliciousfestsalad @lilliumrorum

@asgards-princess-of-mischief @fallout-girl219 @dracaryxzs @snowtargaryen 

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

/YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO TRANSLATE, OR TO STEAL ANY OF MY WORKS TO THIS OR OTHER PLATFORMS/

[aviiarie]

cws & notes: reader (and kaveh) are VERY implied to be aromantic or on the aromantic spectrum. mentions of kissing. lots of platonic affection. platonic kaveh & gn!reader. 1.1k words. wrote this for myself tbh

“So are you two dating?”

You wish you could say it's the first time you've heard the question. And you wish you could bring yourself to be annoyed about hearing it again, but you know there's no malice or spite in the words. Only a polite sort of curiousity, unaware of the way your stomach turns at the thought.

And maybe you wish you could tell Nilou 'no, we're not, why would you think that?' but you know your hand is intertwined with his, and his knee is touching yours, and you have his cheek leaning against the top of your head. You know how it looks, but that never mattered. It felt comfortable, like you fit together just right. Affectionate, with no strings attached.

That was the part that no one seemed to get. You and him were at an understanding that seemed to make sense to no one but yourselves; the squeezing hugs, and nicknames, and nights spent staying up until 3am didn't mean a thing. When you fell asleep on his shoulder, when he chastely kissed you goodbye before leaving on a work trip, it wasn't because you both harboured a secret love you were too shy to say out loud.

You adored him, of course. He was your best friend. But that was it; no strings.

There were always those who couldn't wrap their heads around the thought, the ones who insisted that they had to be at least into each other a little bit. So much time spent being friends, such closeness had to speak to a blossoming romance that just hadn't quiet bloomed yet, right?

What they didn't know was you had tried, your senior year at the Akademiya. It was after all of the comments about how odd it was that they were so close without being a couple finally started to get to them. During a party hosted by a classmate you don't remember the name of, when the teasing and jabs had gotten a little too much, you had found him taking a breather out on the front steps.

Conversation came easily, comfort came quietly, and soon the topic shifted to what people were saying. It was always talk, rumours, gossip. But he could see how they were weighing on you. He could see the look of doubt in your eyes, wondering if this was something you were supposed to want.

If you can't bring yourself to fall for the most important person in your life, then what was wrong with you? Was love a prize that you were never going to win, a lock that you're never going to find the key for?

“Will you kiss me?” You blurted out, and his eyebrows raise. “J-Just once. I just... everyone keeps telling me I'm supposed to like you, and you're supposed to like me, but I just...”

“You want to see?” Kaveh asked hesitantly. You swallow, and nod. “I don't want to do something you don't want to do.”

“I want to. Please, I... I don't want to ask anyone else.” You paused, before quietly adding on, “If there's truly something wrong with me, I want to know now.”

The pinch between Kaveh's eyebrows deepened, but there was a flicker of vulnerability behind his eyes. Some part of him was flashing with the same fear, wondering if there was something wrong with him too, all because he couldn't muster up enough emotion to see you in a romantic light.

Carefully, he placed his hand on your cheek, bringing your face closer to his. There was a pause, before he met your lips in an awkward kiss. There were no sparks that crackled against your mouth, no butterflies in your stomach. It was a unpleasant clashing of teeth together, with your cracked lips pressing against his soft ones for a second too long.

You pull away, face flushed with embarrassment more than anything. “I... I don't think I want to do that again.”

“Me neither.” Kaveh grimaced. He sighed, leaning back to give you a bit more space. “Why do you worry so much about what they say?”

“Because! I'm supposed to enjoy it, aren't I?” There were tears in your eyes, but you didn't care. If there was one person you could cry around, it was him. “What is wrong with me? Why can't I even fake it?”

“You don't need to!” Kaveh said quickly. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration. “Maybe... maybe some people just don't like that sort of love. I know I sure don't, and I've known you long enough to figure out you don't either. We don't have to be a couple to care about each other, right?”

You stared at him, slightly dazed. “...I guess not.”

And since that night, you've never been able to forget his words, and the way he said them. It was like your world got shifted around, and nothing seemed quite the same. All the stress about love, all the worry about whether people thought you were a couple seemed so insignificant all of a sudden.

Yet, your new lighter worldview never stopped that burning question, that followed the pair of you like a shadow.

“So, are you two dating?”

The question echoes in your head, sounding over and over. Nilou is still staring at you, waiting for an answer, although her gaze occasionally flicks to your linked hands resting on his lap.

“We're just friends,” Kaveh responds smoothly. He lets go of your hand long enough to wave away the question, laughing lightly. “Honestly, the amount of times I've been asked that...”

“O-Oh!” Nilou's eyes widen, and her cheeks turn pink. Part of you feels bad for making her look so flustered, but the uncomfortable twist in your gut reminds you that it was her question that started it in the first place. “I didn't mean to assume... you just look so close!”

“We are.” He smiles gently. “But I can assure you we are very happy as friends. Neither of us are interested in that sort of relationship, much less with each other.”

She nods, as if she understands, but there's still confusion behind her expression.

It didn't matter. People didn't have to get what was so special about the two of you. They didn't have to understand what you had, and what you lacked, and why it didn't make much of a difference at all.

You were friends, best friends. And that was plenty enough love for the both of you.

© aviiarie 2024. do not copy, repost, translate or use my work to train ai

[redflagshipwriter]

Red Hot Ghouls 14 part 2/2

Masterpost 

Danny had kind of ignored the most important part of that initial message. Crud. Of course the poor bastard wanted to know about the progress on their spiritual separation. Danny cringed. He typed fast to send a new message before Jason could ask again.

It did not come out easily. He wrote and deleted two drafts before he groaned aloud. “I am not prepared to tell him that the options so far are either to marry and divorce me or to get his ass banished from the ghost dimension.” Danny spent a moment pitying himself. “I just have to say the truth.”

Cringe. Cringe so hard. 

I have two possible solutions but they both suck really hard. :/ Suck so hard you’d be shook. The suckage would change your life.

Jason sent back ellipses. It belatedly occurred to Danny that it might have looked like he was making a blowjob joke. He put the phone back on his chest and stared at the ceiling for a while, wondering why he was this way.

“Jason didn’t see that,” Danny told himself. “Jason is a professional. A professional something. I don't know what.” 

He wanted to believe it so badly that he just decided not to be mortified. Danny lifted the burner phone back up and painstakingly assembled a shrug emoji from symbols. 

Honestly they’re such bad options that I don’t even wanna tell you. Can we change the subject? : (

Jason sent back a series of laughing and crying emojis and then, Fine. Let’s talk about all the other stuff we have in common.

Danny pursed his lips. “...Do we have anything in common?” It wasn’t like he knew much about the guy, but he presumed Jason kept himself busy with some boring adult job, building muscle, and biking around looking hot. Danny crossed his legs at the knee and tried not to think of what a twig he looked like in comparison to Jason. He didn’t feel bad about it, honestly. Danny was too busy to make fitness a part of his personality and he had nothing to prove.

I’m illiterate, he settled on as a response. They definitely did not have a love of literature in common. What else did people do? I uh…. Watched a movie two years back.

Any good?

T’was shit, Danny admitted. Hm. He frowned. “I’m not sure where to take this conversation,” he said aloud.

I’m so hungry. Just got off work and I’m trying to decide what to do.

“Oh, I can do something with that.” Danny felt better. Yeah me too, I would kill for an enchilada. He tried to send a ghost emoji and groaned when he remembered that this was a shitty burner phone with no keyboard downloaded and apparently no access to the app store. Jason had already responded by the time that he gave up.

Ghosts eat Mexican food?

They would if they have human zone money, Danny sent back morosely. Oh no, it wasn’t fun anymore. Ya boy can’t pay in the tears of the damned anywhere on this plane of existence smh. His stomach growled with obnoxious timing. He groaned. The last thing he’d eaten had been that sandwich with Jazz. He could cook… He really should cook. 

Ugh. Effort. 

Danny tried to motivate himself up to the kitchen. “It’s four steps,” he said aloud, trying to be encouraging. “I can make it.”

Ah. No. That was actually kind of depressing. He lived in a shoebox with a monthly grocery budget that was just pitiful.

Haha ur broke, Jason sent, because he was a massive bitch. Danny felt a lot better about flipping him off. But then Jason followed it up with an obviously insincere, I’d get you enchiladas if you were in Gotham. Sucks to suck.

Danny sensed weakness to exploit.

“You’re going to regret that,” Danny grimly promised, and hit the call button.

Jason picked up on the second ring, sounding confused and electronic. “Hey?”

“I can be in Gotham for enchiladas,” Danny threatened. His stomach growled again. “You feeling brave? Huh? Huh?” He punched a finger at the air in accusation. “I’m not scared of you or your dank gargoyles, leatherboy.”

There was a weird mechanical sound. Maybe a snort? A laugh? “I’ll send you a GPS point, if you’re there in ten I’ll buy you all you can eat.”

Danny went still like the predator he was. “Bring your life savings.” He hit the end call button and launched himself off the couch to go stuff his feet into his shoes. He let his apartment door slam shut behind him carelessly. He’d made it to the ground level before the pin point landed.

“Fuck, it’s even in my neighborhood.” Danny laughed, flush with petty victory. He looked left, right, and went invisible before he went ghost. There was no one around at this late hour to see him drop off the visible spectrum.

[fp-am]

Ok I normally don’t write lazy oneshots in Tumblr posts but I had this idea

What if, during Green’s little evil arc, the gang just talked to Alan?

(And Green and Alan have to have a talk)

Lazy Oneshot under the cut.

*Green walks into Alan’s drawing program. It’s pretty awkward after the CG told him off. Alan is animating.*

Alan: Hey, Green.

Green (awkwardly): ..hey.

Alan: Have a seat.

*hesitantly, Green sits.*

Alan: So, you have a YouTube channel now. Is that correct?

Green: ..yeah?

Alan: That’s great! How’s it been doing?

Green (a bit surprised): It’s been really good! I’ve been gaining a lot of traction recently! I’m surprised you haven’t heard of it yet.

Alan: I see. Well, I’ve been watching your videos.

Green: Really?! They’re great, right?! I already know they are..

Alan: ..I’ve been watching your videos, and I have to say that your more recent ones are.. *he wholeheartedly chuckles, then laughs*.. they’re terrible!

Green(shocked): W-WHAT?!

Alan: Yeah! They’re bad! I can barely get through one. Too much editing, too much energy, it’s overwhelming.

Green (defensive): W-Well! That’s just you! My viewers love it! I know it! I read my comments!

Alan: Really now? Let’s go through them together then.

*Alan pulls up a tab with one of Green’s recent videos, pauses the video, and scrolls down to the comments. They appear positive.*

Green: Hah! See? They love me and the videos I put out!

Alan: Mhm. Let’s go a little further.

*as he scrolls, the comments get more negative and get more criticism”

Alan: There.

Green: Well.. there’s a reason they’re at the bottom! They’re wrong. Haters!

Alan: They’re not hating. They’re giving you feedback. Here’s a good one. Ahem.. “Green, good video, but everything seems a little off. All the extra editing is really headache inducing, and your friends seem distant. Can you please go back to real moments with your friends?”

Green: They’re just being negative to be negative.

Alan: They’re giving you advice and recommendations. I can tell, just by your attitude, that you avoid these on purpose, and that’s not a good thing to be doing.

Green: …

Alan: Not to mention, the only reason you’re doing YouTube is for the traction your videos bring in. That’s not what this job is about.

Green: Then what is it about, huh? How would you know?!

Alan: It’s about doing what you like. I would know, because I have 28 million subscribers.

Green: We- WHAT?! No you don’t! You’re lying!

*Nonchalantly, Alan pulls up his channel.*

Green: ALAN? WH- Why have you never brought this up before?!

Alan: Because I don’t feel the need to brag, which is apparently something you do a lot, according to your friends.

Green: But.. I don’t.. I’m..

Alan: Listen, Green. I get it. YouTube is exciting, don’t get me wrong, it can lead you to some pretty exciting places. But, when you start doing YouTube for the sake of fame, it loses its meaning.

A lot of YouTubers I’ve witnessed the growth of over the years have taken the route you’re going down right now. Exploiting their audiences and staff to produce cheap videos that get them views, likes, and money. That’s all this platform is to them. A way to get eyes on you. A lot of times? That leads to controversy, injury, and a terrible life.

I saw your earlier videos. They were good, Green! You put love into them. That’s the most important thing that your new videos lack. You’re trying to produce content that catches people’s attention, flashy meaningless junk that’s soulless. I would be a bad caretaker and fellow content creator if I just let you go down that route. So I have to tell you to take a step back.

In sorry for being harsh, but if I wasn’t, you wouldn’t listen. The thing is, the people that genuinely like the real content you put out will stay. The rest won’t, and that’s life. You just have to find those people.

Do you understand?

Green: I’m.. yeah. ..yeah. Thank you, Alan. And.. I’m sorry.

Alan: You’re alright. Now, go talk to your friends. I’m sure an apology is way overdue.

:3

[orangelovesyoumore]

𐙚CATERINA LORE DUMP! 𐙚 (*´∀`)♪

AughGahh pre-Randal owner ship Cat!!!! Prepare for a lot of text (*´▽｀)v

Caterina has really hazy memories of her old owners, it's been a lot of years since she's been in their ownership so she doesn't remember nor talk a lot about them, add to that she hasn't always had this level of councioussness nor this level of control of her body, but here they are!

OWNER #1 (That she can recall) AMÉLIE!

Amélie Von Dutch was one of the first people to take care of Caterina, she doesn't recall a lot about this little gal, as she was just gaining bits of conciousness, but she remembers that Amélie took great care of her, even into her teens. She loved playing with her but as all kids do, they grow up and lose interest, now giving Caterina away to an antique shop for someone else to take, wich would take a few years.

OWNER #2 BENJAMIN

Benjamin Winchester, such a sweet kid! Caterina's youngest owner, his sister was the one who bought him a doll for his birthday (much to his parents dismay). He really enjoyed his time with Cat, even if it was cut short by his parents wich deemed it unbelievable that he could enjoy what is considered a "girls toy", after a fight between the family about it , they gave her away to one of their cousins much to both Benjamin and Caterina's dismay.

OWNER #3 CAROL

Carol Winchester‐Anderson, Benjamin's cousin and Caterina's last kid owner. Caterina remembers her time with her a lot more than she remembers the last kids ownership, maybe because here she was a lot more lucid and well, alive! Carol was a bit of a problem child, she wasn't allowed a lot of dolls due to her uuh—destructive tendencies! More rough than the average child and an affinity for scissors, when she saw that there wasn't much else to do with Caterina, she left her aside to be then donated again to an antique shop.

In this period of her dollhood, Caterina still didn't understand a lot of what surrounded her or what it meant to be something, she spent years in the antique shop there without knowing what's next with little to no interactions (that explains why she's kind of an airhead too, she's still figuring out what makes her her. Even if it makes her seem dumb). It had been years of sitting on a cluttered shelf collecting dust when she looked up to find someone new already staring at her, the collector.

A mortician and an amateur doll collector, the collector stepped in as Caterina's first proper owner in years. He at first was a little startled at the fact that she stared back up at him in the store, but that solidified his need to take her and fix her up. He was the one who embroidered the flowers on her dress and veil! Along with doing her face up again and adding the black ribbons to her dress was previously all white and in his words "It needs contrast!", he fixed her previously choppy and irregular hair, is shorter than she would have liked but she' glad she looks decent now. He could be an aloof and weird guy but the time he spent with Caterina is cherished. But if they got along so well, how did she end up with Randal? Well, being a mortician is a busy and distant job, he didn't know if he could take her of a living doll who still couldn't decipher the why's of life full-time and give her the attention she deserved so, even if he didn't want to let her go, he did, because that's what people who care for eachother do, right?

So he drove her to a new antique shop, this one located inside a mall and dropped her off, wishing her the best and for her to find someone who could take her of her properly and sped away.

This time, Caterina didn't have to wait a lot for a new owner, Luther finding her and thinking she would be a great gift for Randal behaving so well recently, he bought her (with a bit of resistance from the shopkeeper, that had grown fond of the doll the months she was there) and took her back to the Ivory household, what a surprise it was to see that this doll was pretty much moving and speaking, usually when Randal said his dolls spoke he meant creepy murmurs and whispers, not human-like speech! Well, not that he can take her back, his little brother is already attached to his new doll, it would break his heart if he were separate them!

Sorry for the long dump, thank you so much for reading! I'm so sorry if there are any typos or sentences that don't make sense, english isn't my first language but I still hope you enjoy!!!!!! (*´∀｀)ﾉ♡♡♡♡♡♡ I love yapping about Cat (*´Д`) </33

@wilhelmina1233 hehehehh3hHehehhehs POW BOOM LORE BOMB ON YA!!!!! (*｀▽´*)

[triannel]

HI!!! I adore how you write bill, an my own birthday is tomorrow an im ✨Terrified✨✨,, n was wondering ifff. You could do a sorta angst-fluff where its the readers birthday, but every single one of his birthdays has been awful. And like, now that bills here with the reader he feels like maybe he wont have to Just survive his birthday? That even with his god awful family, it might be ok. Like yeah the meds help, but it doesnt fix anything if the people youre with are why youre fucked yknow? IDK and maybe bill decides to take it upon himself to remove the readers family😋 cant be a neglected middle child w all the responsibilities of the eldest if youre an orphan/J AN I DONT MIND HOW CLOSE YOU STAY TO THIS I LOVE YOUR WRITING ANYWAYS!!

(,,,o n also the reader maybe be a grungey scene kid kinda guy? Lots of piercings, an is more feminine than his parents think he should be, especially as a trans guy, So thats smth. Love bones n bugs and shinies an is like if a dog n crow were a guy,, n supr srry if this is a bad req!! Im jus excited cus i love bill, and im also stressy out cus of my burthdayy >_<“) SO NO PRESSURE TO RESPOND ESPECIALLY IF THIS IS TOO LONG OR ANYTHIMG!!!/gen

-🌙

Hello and Happy Birthday 🌙 anon! I've managed to whip this up and I hope it gives you at least some sort of comfort for today. I really do hope you're situation gets better soon, take care of yourself and have a great day! (Also, don't worry, I never really do mind long asks.)

BirthDate

Oneshot | Bill Cipher x Reader | Fluff/Comfort?

Warnings: Mention of Death, Implied Abuse, Implied Trauma, Implied Bad Birthdays, Bill Cipher lol

Quickly stepping upstairs, you lock yourself in your bedroom, blocking all the noise emenating from downstairs. Exhaling, you drop to your bed, letting yourself relax into comfort of the soft mattress and fluffy pillows.

Only needing rest by this point, you close your eyes. Wanting nothing more than to leave this place behind.

"WHOA, DIDN'T EXPECT TO SEE YOU SO EARLY!" A voice suddenly spoke, booming loudly for you to hear.

Ah yes, there he is. You can't exactly say he's your best pal, but right this moment, you truly do feel more at ease with him than being back there.

"It's honestly been a long day so..." You shrugged for a moment before continuing, "Does it bother you?" You ask, giving a lighthearted smile.

"NOT AT ALL, I WOULDN'T BLAME ANYONE BY WANTING TO MEET YOURS TRULY," he spoke, blinking slowly in a dramatic way to show off his 'impressive looks'.

You chuckle slightly, shaking your head, "I mean, I don't think I'm exactly the one to choose to be here..." speaking your thought aloud just to perhaps tease him a little as you glance at him for a moment before slightly chuckling once more.

You never really did know how you even get to meet him to be honest, he somewhat always manages to show up in your dreams, so overtime you guessed that he might be the one approaching you...That, or it might be because of something else entirely.

For a moment, you thought you saw him become nervous for a second, but maybe it didn't happen at all as you only saw it for less than a second.

"WELL, JUST WANTED TO CHECK HOW YOU'RE DEALING WITH KNOWING YOU'RE ONE YEAR CLOSER TO YOUR DEATH," he flatly said, in a weird, eerie way. He always did love being weird so this type of behaviour wouldn't be uncommon by this point.

"Right... Well, what's the agenda for this time then? Or are you busy?" You ask, avoiding your 'birthday' in question. You'd much rather not talk about your birthday at all to be honest. Not a single one ever went well...

Adjusting his bowtie, he started to speak, "WELL..."

Snapping his fingers, your surroundings completely change.

The rest of your 'dream' went on a relatively good note. Having a cup of tea, playing chess, you both did the usual activities you both would do when meeting in your subconscious mind. But the only thing is that, he seemed to be more...well a bit more charming and noticeably, but only slightly more open to your suggestions on what else to spend time on.

He'd usually take the wheel and drag you through any activity he wants, but this time though, this time he was a bit more...considerate.

Now playing a board game with him, you take the dice and roll it. Getting one, Bill chuckles slightly at your misfortune for a second before taking the dice from you.

He might be treating you like this because it's your birthday, but you'd doubt it... Well at least for now-

"EY, IT'S YOUR TURN TOOTS," he snapped his finger a few times in front of your face.

Chuckling, you mutter an apology before taking the dice. Rolling it in your hands, you then let it go. As the dice lands on the floor, it lands on a six, letting you be the winner for the match.

"Yess, I won!" You raise your arms, smiling back at him.

"CHECK AGAIN." Bill spoke, pointing at your piece. Looking down at the board, you see a newly added tile in front of your piece, moving the finish line out of reach. You raise your eyebrow, giving him the side eye.

"WHAT? I DON'T MAKE THE RULES," he raised his shoulders, smiling mischievously with his eye.

Shaking your head, you chuckled at his silly banter while giving him the dice for his turn.

It's unexpected but, this dorito triangle man truly has made a significance on making your birthday much more bearable. Be it his choice to do it or not, you're honestly just glad to at least have some semblance of joy sprout on this day.

I haven't been able to post for a week because unfortunately I became rlly busy at the moment and it isn't helping that I do tend to procrastinate at times. I'll post more regularly later, but for now at least, I'll post this here. Once again, happy birthday 🌙 anon!

[hurtspideyparker]

Emotional Support Intern Peter Parker

Tony and Peter finally arrive in the large room, polished leather Oxfords and stained-lace Converse making their way through the crowd of professionals. Tony has a hand on Peter's back guiding him, because no matter how many meetings, conferences, and office buildings they traverse together, Peter always manages to get lost the second Tony lets go. 

Thankfully Pepper is easy to spot, shaking hands with some blah blah from wee woo Industries. Her hair is the only splash of colour in the constant white black grey of everyone's pencil skirts and collared shirts. 

"Hi Ms. Potts!" Peter greets as soon as the woman turns and spots them. 

"Hi Peter—Tony. I told you to stop bringing the kid to these things. No offense Peter."

"None taken! You look lovely, did you get your hair done?"

Pepper's hair cascades over her shoulder in perfect curls, splayed out over her white button-up. 

"Yes actually, a trim and some highlights. I think she went shorter than I asked though, because I always get half an inch, and this does not look like half an inch."

Peter steps a bit closer and squints at the piece of copper hair she's holding out. 

"I think it's just because she curled it. You usually get it blow dried after."

"Hm. I think you're right actually."

Tony rolls his eyes, "I'm so glad you guys are having such a great slumber party. C'mon kid I have to avoid that senator and he's starting to glance this way." He tries to head over to some tall plants that happen to be great blind spots. 

"Ah ah ah Tony! We are talking about this. I told you to stop dragging Peter to all of your work responsibilities. I'm sure he's bored to death with these meetings and work events."

"Pep, he's an intern, he's supposed to be bored and taken advantage of. Besides, if you take away my emotional support intern then I simply wouldn't show up! So."

"You aren't even paying him for his time!" Pepper says at the same time Peter mumbles "emotional support intern?"

"Um excuse me, that 3 million dollar suit he stuffs between his math homework and Go-Gurt begs to differ. And anyways, I pay him with experience. I brought him to that seminar in LA on Saturday, and he's following me to Tokyo for that week long conference in July. I highly doubt he's complaining," he squeezes the boy's shoulders, Peter looking up and beaming at him and Pepper. 

"I'm really fine with it Ms. Potts. Besides, the more of these things I go to the more lab time I get!" Peter pipes in.

Pepper glares at Tony. "Really, bribery?" 

"Okay well, if us grown adults don't want to be here how else am I supposed to get a 15 year old to talk about environmental reform to people who don't even believe in climate change." 

Pepper and Tony hold each other's stares.

"You mean he spoke to Mr. Ellis about the generator you designed for his carbon plant, and it didn't end with him calling us a pansy corporation and you calling him a decrepit geezer who's business is the only thing that's going to die quicker than he is?"

There's barely stiffled hope supressed under Pepper's professionalism. 

Tony smirks. "Yep, I think Mr. Ellis even smiled. The kid's got charm! Who knew."

Pepper glances at Peter in consideration. 

"Peter have you ever considered pursuing anything further in business? Engineering is great, but if you really want to be successful it's incredibly important to build interpersonal skills, leadership, and even current market and finance knowledge. I mean you might want to sell your designs one day, or start a company." 

"Oh, I haven't really-"

"You could shadow me! I mean interning with a CEO is a once in a lifetime opportunity, it would give you a glowing resume, and I know a lot more about this stuff than Tony. He didn't even perform his executive duties when he actually was the CEO."

Pepper has that gleam in her eyes, the one she gets when men call her sweetheart, or when Tony isn't even dressed for their reservation that started ten minutes ago. 

It means she's already had the argument in her head. 

Peter is still stuttering, flustered with this side of Pepper. Her business face isn't usually directed at him, and it's a far cry from the woman who sends him home with leftovers from dinner. 

"Wait wait wait, are you trying to steal my intern?" Tony asks incredulously. 

"If anyone even needs an intern Tony it would be me. I have to babysit you and the company, meanwhile you just need him to hand you wrenches. Competent help is hard to find these days and you're wasting his talents." 

"Um, excuse me, he's the only thing keeping me together. You already have your fancy day planner and Excel spreadsheets, I need him to get me out of the house. He's the only thing keeping me a responsible adult, if you take away my emotional support intern then I will not attend a single meeting for the rest of the quarter." 

"You are such a man child!"

"La la la la can't hear youuu," Tony says with his fingers in his ears.

"Um, guys, I think people are staring."

Peter tugs on the corner of Tony's sleeve to get him to unplug his ears, glancing nervously at the groups of people sending them judgemental stares. The three of them give a wave and pleasant smile, most of the crowd continuing to move along on the grey carpet at the sight of their unsettling synchronicity and false turn of the lips. 

Pepper speaks through her teeth, a grin still presented at passers-by. "Fine, you can keep him, but only because he's doing half my job for me. The only person you can emotionally regulate around and it's a teenager. I'm glad you finally found someone who can keep you entertained." 

"Love you too honey," Tony says while putting a hand on the small of her back and kissing her cheek. He sighs, looking around the room at all the government officials who think these tech companies are spying on them. 

Apparently a surveillance state is only cool when they do it to manipulate their incarceration numbers, rig elections and lobby votes, and not for data mining and targeted ads. 

"I say we hit the cheese and crackers, take an awkward amount of sips from those tiny water bottles, and then speak to some old ladies till we have to do our presentation."

"Sounds great Mr. Stark. Will you make sure they don't grab my face again? I smelled like old lady perfume at school and Flash started making fun of me for stealing people's grandmas."

Tony looks into Peter's eyes questioningly and finds nothing but sincerity and resignation in them. 

"Well. Not my fault your cheeks are so gosh darn cute. But I'll do my best," he wraps an arm around the shorter and starts heading through the room again. 

The weight is comforting. Peter used to get anxious at these events, but Tony never leaves his side and is always looking at him like he's the Michaelangelo in the center of every room. He became accustomed to being Mr. Stark's favourite part of the event. While that may not seem difficult, especially considering the droning lectures and snooty company, it always feels special making jokes about people's ridiculous work jargon, and comparing the staleness of crackers at conferences. 

"Emotional support intern huh?" he says smugly. 

Tony glances at him, but instead of scoffing or denying anything, he just speaks with honesty. "You and Pepper are the best, most important things to this company. And to me. I'm really glad you're here kid."

Peter doesn't know what to say. The words stick in his throat while Tony hands him a water bottle with the lid already cracked. 

Peter has super strength; It's completely unnecessary to open his bottle for him. He doesn't point this out. Tony will do it at the next meeting, just like he did at the last one, and Peter will never mention it.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

Doctor who question here, how do you feel about rose and the metacrisis doctor? What do you think their life would have been like, now that the doctor isn’t “the doctor” anymore?

You know interesting question for an interesting pair of people.

How Do I Feel?

To me, Rose and the Metacrisis Doctor was one of those gut punches of "oh, Doctor, no, you didn't, no".

The whole thing was that Rose's relationship, Rose's life, the person Rose was so desperately trying to reach and had lost so much of herself to save was the Doctor.

Metacrisis not only isn't him, but he's a mixture of the Doctor and a woman she's only met briefly: Donna Noble, who was one of her many replacements.

She's then told "Isn't this great, Rose? Now you can be with your One True Love: guy who looks like me but a little more ginger! It's what you always wanted" and she's expected to have her problems all solved and get to live happily ever after with this stranger who has his own ridiculous amount of baggage of being the Almost-Sort-Of-Doctor-And-Or-Donna-But-No-That's-Not-it-Either.

I love it, because it is so awful and is one of the many steps of awful of the tenth doctor journey (which is one from "I'M SO OPTIMISTIC AGAIN" to "OH GOD, THIS IS HORRIBLE").

What Is Their Life Like

Deeply uncomfortable.

See, both of them know the Doctor isn't the one Rose wants, and that Rose perhaps isn't what this Doctor who isn't the Doctor wants. Of course, Rose has to support him because what the fuck is he supposed to do sans TARDIS/place in the world, but it's like they're playing house together and they both know it.

(And sure, they're growing a new TARDIS, but that's going to take, you know, time, a lot of time and they're not exactly immortal.)

Neither can exactly blame the other, especially when the Doctor is the one who shoulders most of the blame there, but it would be remarkably painful to look at one another and know that things aren't quite right (Rose isn't to the Metacrisis Doctor what she was to the Doctor and similarly Metacrisis Doctor isn't the Doctor and never will be).

Maybe they get over this and they can forge their own new relationship, but it'd be very difficult, especially as the whole premise was supposed to be that Rose gets a Doctor who won't run off on her.

Hooray.

[veronicaphoenix]

IKIGAI — ADDITIONAL CHAPTER

Pairing: Noah Sebastian x Lia Parker

Summary: Lia tells Noah she had sex for the first time, and the news doesn't sit right with him. She doesn't feel very thrilled about it either.

Word count: 2.7k | Reading time: 10mins aprox | Series masterpost ✨

Tags & trigger warnings: best friends to lovers trope, lia has a boyfriend, talks about sex, about lia's first time, disappointment, lia being infatuated with noah, mentions of noah having had sexual encounters before but still being a virgin, sexual innuendos, noah feeling jealous and confused.

This chapter takes place between chapter 13 and chapter 14 of Ikigai (part one of The Inevitability of Love at Second Sight Series). Lia and Noah are 21/22.

The moment his phone started ringing and the screen lit up with Lia’s name, Noah paused mid-typing, slipped off his headphones, and answered. Her hurried voice hit his ears before he could say anything.

“Noah, are you home? Is anyone else there?”

Noah frowned, taken aback by her urgency. 

“Hello to you, too, Gremlin. Yeah, I’m home. Why?”

“Are the boys around? Jolly, Jesse?”

“No, I’m alone. What’s up?”

“Good. I’m coming over.”

Noah’s eyebrows shot up. The way she spoke—it almost sounded like she was asking for permission to come back to her own home. 

“Lia, what’s going on?”

“I’ll tell you when I get there.”

Lia disconected the call. Noah remained frozen in place, still perched on his studio chair, staring at his iPhone as if expecting the screen to offer some explanation. 

It didn’t. 

This was Lia’s house, too. They’d been living together since she’d turned eighteen, so why was she acting like a stranger? She hadn’t been home last night, though. She’d gone out with friends, said she’d stay over at Emery’s. Now it was barely eleven in the morning, and this call felt... strange. Something was off, and the knot of unease tightening in Noah’s stomach told him whatever it was, he wouldn’t like it.

Twenty minutes later, the front door burst open. Lia stormed in, her backpack slung over one shoulder, her hair tied in a very messy bun, her face set in agitation—not fear, not hurt, just stress. As soon as her eyes landed on Noah, standing in sweats and a t-shirt in the middle of the living room, her expression shifted to disappointment.

He raised his arms, wordlessly asking what the hell is happening? She didn’t answer right away. Instead, she dropped her bag and rushed to him, wrapping her arms around his chest with a sigh, melting against him as though she’d been holding her breath for hours.

“Lia, are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

It took her a moment before she spoke. 

“I slept with Leon last night.”

Noah’s blood ran cold. He pulled back, grabbing her shoulders, but she clung to his shirt, refusing to let go.

“Lia,” he said, his voice strained. “You...” His head shook. He blinked rapidly. “You had your first time with Leon?”

She nodded, avoiding his eyes now.

His mind reeled, thoguhts scrambling in every direction. 

“Lia—We said we’d do it together. That we’d have our first time at the same time.”

Lia sighed, already anticipating his reaction. It wasn’t like she hadn’t thought about it, too—their weird, half-serious pact, made when they were younger, with all the naivety and awkwardness of two people trying to make sense of their feelings. But now, standing here, it felt like a relic of something neither of them could hold onto. How could that have ever worked, anyway?

She took one step back to look him in the eyes, trying to be practical.

“Noah, how did you think that would go? You in one room with some random chick and me on the other side of the wall?”

“No, but—” He ran a hand through his hair, pacing. He hadn’t been expecting his quiet Sunday morning to turn into this; whatever this was. “Fuck, Lia.”

It hurt. It hurt a lot. But why? Was it just because she’d had sex? Because she did it before him? Or because she’d done it with someone who wasn’t him?

Lia sighed again and walked to the open kitchen, reaching for the kettle. She hadn’t eaten breakfast and was starving. The subtle ache between her legs didn’t help her mood, either. She reached for the kettle, filling it with water. Behind her, she could hear Noah collapse onto the couch.

“I’m sorry,” she muttered, fingers drumming on the counter as she waited for the water to boil.

Noah stared blankly ahead, his thoughts a mess. The idea that Lia wasn’t a virgin anymore—it didn’t sit right. It felt like a puzzle piece has been shoved into the wrong place, forced, stuck forever. His jealousy, or whatever it was, mixed with confusion. But then, an uneasy thought surfaced, shifting everything inside him. 

He stood up abruplty, the sudden clarity jolting him.

“Shit. Lia, did he hurt you?”

She whipped around, startled by the sudden sharpness in his voice, kettle in hand, steam rising.  

“No,” she said flatly. “He didn’t hurt me.”

Noah studied her face, unsure if he believed her. Whether or not she was telling the truth, one thing was certain—he would have never let that happen. He would’ve made sure she felt safe, cared for. Even if they were both inexperienced, they would’ve figured it out together. They always trusted each other like that, in ways that seemed to run deeper than words.

“Then what?” he asked, his voice softer now but still loaded with confusion. “Why do you look like this?”

She turned back to the kettle, her movements robotic, avoiding his gaze. 

“He just... finished, and that was it.” she said, pouring the water into a mug, her tone hollow. “I’m not hurt. I’m disappointed. I didn’t know it would be like that. I thought it’d be more... exciting. There was some thrill at first, but then it just... faded into nothing. And...” She bit her lips, her cheeks flushed a little. She was glad Noah couldn’t see. “I didn’t come,” she added quietly.

Noah stood frozen a few feet away, his mind scrambling to process what she was saying.

“He didn’t notice. Or maybe he didn’t care.” Her voice cracked with frustration. “He just thought it was over.”

Before he could react, she crossed the room, collapsing against him again, her forehead resting against his chest. Her arms hung limp at her sides.

“Oh, God. Noah, it was so disappointing,” she said. “You wouldn’t let a girl feel like that, would you?”

Noah stiffened. He wasn’t sure how to answer.

“I know you wouldn’t,” Lia murmured softly, her voice thick with a mix of frustration and resignation.

“Lia, I...” Noah began, but the words faltered. He had no idea what to say. He wasn’t much more experienced than she was. Sure, he’d gone down on a few girls, fumbled with his fingers and his mouth. Some cheeky girls had touched him, but that was it.

“You don’t have to be experienced for that,” she interrupted, looking up at him with a spark of hope in her big brown eyes. Noah felt a familiar weight press against his chest. Lia had always seen something in him, something pure, as if he were some kind of angel or hero, when in reality, he was full of flaws, just like anyone else. If she was so infatuated with him because of how he treated her, she should know by now—that kind of treatment was reserved for her.

“You just need to be considerate,” she continued. “You are considerate.”

“Lia,” he said, his voice firm as he gently grabbed her shoulders and pushed her back again, creating a bit of distance. She frowned at his authoritative tone.

“Promise me,” she blurted, before he could say more.

“Promise you what?”

“That you’ll be considerate. That you’ll make her come—whoever she is. Any girl. Every time. Always.”

“Jesus Christ, Lia,” Noah groaned, turning away and heading back to the couch, rubbing his forehead in frustration. 

Lia trailed after him, relentless as she picked up her cup of tea and sat next to him on the couch, close enough that their legs touched.

“You can’t just ask me that,” he muttered, snatching the cup from her without asking and taking a sip. The hot liquid burned his tongue, but he didn’t care.

“Why not?” she pressed. “It’s advice. It’ll be good for you.”

“Maybe I don’t need advice,” he snapped, a bit sharper than he intended.

Lia raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. 

“Your ego is showing, Sebastian.”

Noah rolled his eyes and handed back the cup. 

“It’s not about ego. I’m just saying maybe it’ll go fine without us having to talk about it like this.”

Lia sighed, slumping slightly against the cushions, conceding the point, though she wasn’t fully convinced.

“Maybe,” she mumbled, her voice quieter.

She hadn’t expected him to feel uncomfortable discussing this—especially with her. But his attitude suggested otherwise. She bit her lip, a twinge of regret flickering across her face.

“I just needed to talk to you,” she said a bit ashamed, and the tenderness in her voice caught him off guard.

Without thinking, he placed a hand on her knee, squeezing lightly through the fabric of her black leggings. His head lolled back against the sofa, eyes locking on hers. Once again, it hit him—how beautiful she had always been. As a kid, she’d been cute and full of energy. Now, as an adult, she was the prettiest girl he’d ever seen.

“I know,” he said, voice low. “I know.”

“I just got worried. I don’t want other girls to go through that disappointment. I know, sometimes, it’s part of the experience, of growing up, learning, but...” She hesitated, searching for the right words. “I don’t want it to happen when they’re with you. You can’t be a disappointment, Noah.”

“You’re setting the bar really high, Lia. I don’t know if I’ll ever reach it.”

“You’d never let me leave the room like that, would you?”

Noah let out a heavy huff, shaking his head.

“Lia, I’ve already warned you. Don’t make this weird, please.” 

“It’s only a question. You can just answer it. Or don’t. I know the answer. You wouldn’t leave me unfinished.”

He gave her an exasperated look, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes.

“You’re so much trouble, Lia Parker.”

"I’m not, I promise. I’m just a girl asking for equality,” she replied, a playful smirk tugging at her lips. “But if you have your doubts, I could give you more... detailed advice, if you want.”

“No. Absolutely not.”

“All right, your loss,” she concluded, raising a hand in mock surrender.

Noah couldn’t help but laugh, rolling his eyes. He gave her knee a light pat. 

“You’re so dramatic. You know that?”

“I’m not. I’m just... unsatisfied,” she admitted, shaking her head at the memory of how disappointment last night had been. “I need release,” she uttered before she could stop herself. 

His eyes widened as he processed her words. She wasn’t playing around—this wasn’t some offhand joke or a ploy to shock him. She was genuinely frustrated, still reeling from the lack of fulfillment the night before. For a brief moment, a flood of inappropriate thoughts ran through his mind—ways he could help her, ways he could get involved. But he quickly pushed them aside.

“I’m breaking up with him,” she declared, her voice decisive as she lifted the cup of tea to her lips and taking a slow sip. “I don’t care if he thinks I just wanted him for sex. I definitely don’t want him for sex after that.”

Noah could have told her it was only her first time, that things could get better with practice. She could talk to Leon, communicate, learn together like couples were supposed to. They’d only been together for a few months, after all. But deep down, Noah felt a sense of relief. He didn’t want to give her advice on how to fix things with her boyfriend. He was content with her decision, and he wasn’t going to argue with it.

It might’ve been selfish, but single Lia meant more of her at home, more of her for him. Leon could learn how to get a woman to orgasm with someone else.

“Can we spend the day watching movies and eating junk food?” Lia asked, her big puppy-dog eyes making it impossible to say no. She was the queen of that look, and she knew exactly how to use it on him.

Of course they could. He would never deny her anything. But where was the fun in giving in so easily? He leaned back, a smirk curling at the edge of his lips.

“Didn’t you say you needed... release? Don’t you wanna go to your bedroom first?”

“Oh, Noah!” she gasped, giving him a playful punch on the shoulder, her laughter tangling with his. “You’ll never know when I’m doing it. I’m very quiet.”

She was, indeed. He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t strained his ears a few times, hoping to catch something from her bedroom at night.

“Really? So, when you get wet, you don’t go full Gremlin mode?”

“I swear, Sebastian, if you don’t shut up, I’m spilling this tea all over you.”

“I’m already hot enough, thanks.”

She narrowed her eyes at him.

“You’re pushing it.”

“Says the one who barged in talking about sex and orgasms.”

“Ugh, you might be right, but—”

“I am right.”

“All right, fine.” She paused, then leveled him with a serious look. “You have to promise me, though, that you’ll think about them—not just yourself—when it happens.”

“Ooookay.” He lifted his pinky finger toward her, the smirk still lingering. “I promise.”

She laced her pinky with his, sealing the deal. 

“Happy now?” He asked. 

“Not really. It’s still weird thinking about you with other girls, but yeah, better than I was thirty minutes ago.”

Noah narrowed his eyes, studying her face, trying to read her thoughts. There was something unspoken between them, an invisible thread that always seemed to pull tighter the closer they got. 

He let out a breath, feeling the subtle shift between them. It wasn’t the tension that was there earlier; it was something softer, more familiar. With Lia, things never stayed too heavy for long. It was one of the things he loved about her—things could be strange, awkward, but they never broke.

Lia settled next to him, nudging her shoulder against his as Noah turned on the TV. He suggested they play some video games instead of watching a movie, and she agreed, completely unaware of the storm brewing in his mind. Inappropriate images flashed through his thoughts—images of them together, naked, her soft commands in his ear as he obeyed, eager to make her feel as good as she deserved. He wondered what it would be like if she said the words, if she let him, if they crossed that line. How much would he give to her? Everything, if she asked.

Not long after that day, Noah lost his virginity. It was with a girl he’d met at a friend’s house—a black-haired girl who had sparked some fleeting interest in him. He hadn’t thought much of the girl at first, but when they started dancing together, he felt… attraction. 

The night they had sex, they had all been out at a club, Noah, Lia, Matt, Jolly, and their usual group of friends. 

Lia had seen them on the dancefloor—caught a glimpse of the girl kissing Noah’s neck, her lips lingering too long. Something twisted inside her, an unwelcome feeling she didn’t quite understand. She told herself to get a grip and finished her beer in one quick gulp. When Noah and his new girlfriend passed by her on their way out, Lia winked at him, already tipsy, her face flushed from the alcohol.

Noah hesitated. He wanted to stay, to make sure Lia got home safely like he always did, but the girl tugged on his arm, pulling him away. He found himself torn between the pull of his present and the weight of his responsibility to Lia. But for the first time, he didn’t stay.

Later that night, with the black-haired girl in his bed, all Noah could think of was Lia. He tried to focus, to be in the moment, but her presence was a ghost in the room. Every girl after that night would carry the same haunting thread—because every time he had sex, Lia was there. Her promise, her words, lingered in his mind.

He had sworn to her that he’d be considerate, that he’d make every girl feel special, and he did. But what Lia didn’t know was that every girl he touched, every one he pleased, was just a stand-in. No matter whose legs he was between, no matter who whispered his name, his thoughts always circled back to her. Lia was always in his head. The promise he’d made to her—it was her name, her face, her pleasure, that guided every move.

And that secret was one he’d carry with him, long after the girls were gone.

🔖 The Inevitability of Love at Second Sight taglist:

@somebodyels3 | @respectfulrebel | @thecoyotescry | @bluestdai | @lma1986

@sweetwombatpizza | @missduffsblog | @shilohrosechicken | @jilliemiw86 | @alwaysfightforwhoyouare

[dragon-kazansky]

The song in our hearts

Lestat De Lioncourt x Female Reader

A musician with a heart that sings and an admirer who wishes to see his songbird thrive. Two beings in different worlds get caught up in each other when someone threatens to steal his songbird's spotlight. Loving Lestat isn't simple, and your life will never be the same again. What is eternity without chaos?

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Chapter Eight - Deep into the hole

“I can't believe this is happening. What do you think happened to him?” Amelie asks, looking more than a little worked up.

“I really don't know…” You lie. It feels awful lying to her, but telling her the truth would be far worse. Why did you ever have to cross paths with Lestat?

“I can't believe it.” She says again.

You focus on making the coffee. There was very little chance of you getting any sleep right now anyway. You pour two cups and hand one to Amelie. She takes it with a soft ‘thank you.’

“You know… you were the last person I saw him with…”

You look at her. “Please tell me you're not accusing me of anything. Amelie, I don't know where he is.” 

“I know. I was just saying…” The tone of her voice leaves you a little unconvinced. There's doubt lingering in your mind and for the first time ever you're left wondering who your real friends might be.

“I'm a lot of things, but a murderer ain't one.”

Amelie seems to realize how her words had sounded and moves closer to you. She reaches out for your hand and sighs loudly. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. I've just been thinking too much.”

“I know. I'm sorry. Please don't let whatever is happening come between us. You're one of the few people I have.”

Amelie puts down her coffee so she can hug you. You return the gesture, but doubt is still eating away at your mind.

‘Come to me, Chéri.’

You hear him in your head. He was probably disappointed you had left. You needed time to think before you went back. There was too much going on.

You wake suddenly. Light is illuminating your room through your curtains. Amelie is fast asleep on your couch and you're curled up in a chair beside her. Two forgotten cups of coffee sit on the table.

Your head pounds as you get up out of the chair. You take a few moments to gather yourself and then start cleaning up. Amelie only stirs after you start filling the sink with water to wash up with.

“What time is it?” She asks, stretching.

“Noon.”

“Oh no! I'm supposed to be at the theater to answer questions about Noah. Damn it. I have to go.” She scrambles to get up.

“Wait a minute.” You wipe your hands and walk over to her. “What do you mean?”

“The police were going to go back to the theater today to ask questions. I promised Jack I'd be there.”

You feel an uneasy feeling in your body. “I'll take you.”

Arriving at the theater, you only see one police car parked outside. It gives you a feeling of dread as you look at it. Amelie leads the way inside.

All the performers are gathered in the lobby. They're all talking amongst each other. Through the commotion you can see Jack talking to two officers. After a few moments he turns to everyone and steps up on a chair.

“Quiet!”

Everyone falls silent. Jack turns to the officers. The tallest of the two steps forward. “We're here to enquire about Noah. It would seem his disappearance holds more questions than answers. One by one we're going to take you into the theater and ask you questions. If anyone knows anything about where he may be, dead or alive, please come forward.”

It feels like it gets harder to breathe.

The shorter officer steps forward and calls the first name. While they go inside, the rest of the crew all begin talking again. They're all trying to figure out what's happening. Jack gets bombarded with questions.

You take a seat on one of the small couches in the lobby. Amelie turns and looks at you quietly. She walks over and takes a seat beside you. “You okay?” 

“Yeah, just… can't believe this is happening. Do they really think something happened to Noah?”

“His sister certainly thinks so. She went to his place and all his stuff was still there, but the door was locked. Reckon he was taken or something before he even got home.”

Shit. Shit. Shit.

Was Lestat even going to do anything about all of this? He knows what's happening. He surely knows how much trouble you're in. Then again, can the police even connect you with Noah's disappearance. No one actually saw you with him alone. Lestat came in quick at the time and took him just as fast.

There's no evidence you were with him after the show.

One by one more performers were called into the theater. The ones who have been questioned already get asked to leave immediately. You watch each of them head on home.

Jack comes over to you after half the lobby is empty. He sees you with Amelie.

“I didn't realize you were. You don't need to be here.”

You look up at him. “Don't they want to question everyone?”

“Yes, but you're clear.”

You furrow your brows at him. “What do you mean I'm clear?”

“I already told the police that after the incident on stage, you left and Noah came to me. You were gone before the end of the show.”

“What?”

“Noah came to talk to me after you left the stage that night. I don't know where he went after, but when I came to your room, you were already gone.”

Jack doesn't know about the brief altercation in your dressing room. It really did happen too quickly for anyone to notice.

“Oh, I see.”

Jack places a hand on your shoulder in support. “You look tired. Go home.”

“No, let me stay.”

The short officer comes out to call for the next person when he sees you and Jack. He walks over and checks his list. “You're the pianist.”

“That's right.”

“Jack has already cleared up your whereabouts, but may we ask you some questions?”

Jack goes to interfere, but you're faster. “Of course. I'll come with you now.”

Jack looks at you with a column expression and watches you go with the officer.

Amelie looks up at him. “She'll be fine. She always is.”

“I know.”

Inside the theater you make your way to where the tall officer is. He's writing some things down. As you approach he looks up.

“This is the pianist Jack mentioned,” the other officer said.

“Oh. Wasn't expecting you here today.”

“I want to help if I can.” You tell him.

He nods. “I'm officer Michaels. That's officer Jackson. Take a seat, ma'am.”

You sit down beside him.

“Did you know Noah?” He asks.

“Not very well. He came to the theater to perform. Jack had suggested we do a duet, but I declined.”

“Yes, I heard as much. May we ask why?”

“I perform alone. I play solo.”

Michaels nods and makes a note of that. He looks at you again. “What happened that night?”

“I was performing. Same as I do every Friday. I was only just into my first song when Noah stormed the stage singing his heart out. I was furious, but only because he ruined my music. Not that he was a bad singer, just that I like my music to speak without the need for words.”

Michaels nods again. “Then what happened?”

Lestat happened. But you can't tell him that.

“I left the stage, ending my performance early. I was not in much mood to be made a fool of. I retreated to my dressing room to gather my things.”

“And then?”

“I went home. I was too embarrassed and furious to talk to anyone. I was gone before the show was over. Didn't even say bye to Jack.”

It wasn't a complete lie. It wasn't the whole truth either.

“I see. Jack said as much. He spoke to Noah briefly and then went to check on you after he had the next performer on stage. Your dressing room was empty. No sign of Noah either. You did not leave with him that night?”

“Not at all.”

Michaels makes a note. “Understood. Thank you for your time, ma'am.”

You nod and rise from the seat. However, before you get too far, you turn. “May I ask, what do you think happened to him?”

“I can't say for certain, but it is likely he disappeared after leaving the theater, but before reaching his home. Rest assured, We will find our answers.”

You nod and leave quietly.

By the time you're leaving the theater, Amelie is going in for questioning. You don't stop to talk to anyone, just like the others did before you. You're on your way home when someone comes up beside you.

“Hey there.”

You turn and see Eleanor has joined you. You had just wanted to go home.

“Hello.”

“May I join you for a moment?” She asks kindly.

“Sure.”

You walk in silence for a few moments before she talks. “My brother wrote about you in his letter to me.”

“He did?” You ask, almost worried about what he had said. You felt too involved in something you didn't actually do.

“He said he had the most beautiful piano piece he had ever heard in his life. He had said to me that he was going to sing to that piano one day.”

You look at her. “He really wanted that?”

“Yes. My brother is an admirer of the arts. Music is his passion.” She smiles. “He used to sing to me all the time.

“I see…”

“It's a shame I didn't get to see him sing with you. You'd make a good pair.”

Her comment makes you feel rather sick. You can feel your stomach turning as you walk. You just wanted to go home and disappear for a few days.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just… tired.”

She seems to fall for your lie and loops her arm around yours. “Let me walk you home.”

You decide to just let her.

As you walk you drift away with your thoughts. It's still day, so Lestat will be asleep. Should you go visit him at nightfall? Should you just leave him be? Lestat seems like more trouble than he's worth.

Yet, the way he looks at you. The way he held you in his arms and kissed you. You can't deny your attraction to him. Lestat was like a drug you couldn't get enough of. You wanted to see him again.

Though he is still the reason this whole mess has happened.

You were confused on what to do.

Before you know it you're standing on your doorstep. Eleanor lets go of your arm and smiles kindly at you.

“Take care.”

You find yourself smiling softly. “I'll try.”

She walks away slowly, clearly lost in her own thoughts. You can't help watching her go. She shouldn't have come here. Everything would have been fine had she simply not come here.

Too late to do anything about it now.

@awanderingghost @theprettiesthead @cosmixstar @theblueslytherin @katherine2098 @sawendel @floofdeloop @sitkafay @bigbaddie45 @bluscryn

@secretisme4 @darkqueen1995 @bridkesby @caribbeangal @sarcasticandfangirl @missjadesfics @kaybart19 @whereismymindnow @chauchirem @angelrenee239 @ppureheroiine

[dollystuartwrites]

Stray Gods - Chapter 49

Pairing: Gods!OT8 x !F!Reader Genre: romance, friends to lovers, polyamory, mystery, supernatural, angst, fluff, smut Wordcount: 5112 Chapters:  [1] - [2] - [3] - [4] - [5] - [6] - [7] - [8] - [9] - [10] [11] - [12] - [13] - [14] - [15] - [16] - [17] - [18] - [19] - [20] [21] - [22] - [23] - [24] - [25] - [26] - [27] - [28] - [29] - [30] [31] - [32] - [33] - [34] - [35] - [36] - [37] - [38] - [39] - [40] [41] - [42] - [43] - [44] - [45] - [46] - [47] - [48] - [49] - [?] MASTERLIST Summary: With no memory of who you were, you wake up in the woods, only to be found by eight unusually handsome men. With no information of the past, the guys decide to take you in and take care of you for the time being. But that time becomes years, and as time passes, you start to notice that there is something different about them... and something different about you... Warnings: angst, praise, thigh riding, kissing, fingering, overstimulation, lovebites, bad/miscommunication, low self-esteem, swearing, name-calling, dry humping, college, degradation, gods, special powers, vaginal sex, oral sex (f&m), mentions of contraception (condoms&thepill), injuries, mentions of death (but no character deaths), virgin!reader, teasing, orgasms, poly relationship, semi-public sex, daddy kink, strength kink, grinding, I've probably forgotten some, so let me know if I did and I will add more as the story progresses.

Taglist: @eastleighsblog​​​​ @tangerminie​​​​ @swittyregan​​​​ @septicrebel​​​​ @jiimout​​​​ @zandra-42​​​​​​@julciaqwerty​​​​ @vampcharxter​​​​ @mercurezed​​ @thatgirlangelb​ @cookiemonstermusic258​​ @stayconnecteed​​ @bubblelixie​​ @smilingtokki@hash2013 @juskz Want to be added or did I miss you? Just send me an ASK or DM

Lots of love and many thanks to my current beta’s from Wattpad: rocker7898 and sydneye2411. You guys made my writing so much better <3

'Hey, look at me,' Felix spoke. You looked over at him, your hands still fidgeting with the straps of your bag sitting on your lap.

Felix had insisted on taking you to school today, as Minho had already left, having to arrive early to be on time to prepare for the lessons he had to teach that day. Minho hadn't said much, and you were sure he was the only one who was as doubtful about the entire situation as you were. When Hyunjin had left your room, he had returned to Han, continuing to monitor him and relieving Felix from his post. You had gotten ready far too slowly, your head still going back and forth between believing and trusting in Hyunjin and the urge to run back into Han's room. By the time you were done, Minho had already left. You knew you had been slow on purpose, hoping that being unable to catch a ride with Minho would give you the excuse to stay home. Somewhere you suspected that that was why Minho hadn't announced his departure, nor given you a heads-up and final call like he usually did. You suspected he too would prefer it if you were to stay home with Han, even if it would hinder your academic success. But Han wouldn't have it. When Felix had left his room it seemed like Han had given him a mission of making sure you would get to school today. After checking your bag for the umpteenth time, pretending you weren't sure if you had packed your favorite pen, notebook, and charger, Felix was starting to lose his patience and urged you out of the house. For the entire drive to school, you sat beside him silently, fiddling with your bag nervously as you kept imagining Han's pale and sick face.

Felix gave you a kind smile.

'We've arrived,' he said simply. You looked out the window again, seeing the familiar building, with many people coming and going to and from the entrance.

'Right,' you said, quickly opening the door and jumping from your seat.

You heard the other car door open and close, and as you were about to take a step towards the school, Felix halted you. He rested his hands upon your shoulders and turned you to face him, hands not leaving you.

'He'll be alright by the time you get home,' Felix assured you, repeating Hyunjin's words.

'How do you know?' You asked, insecurity lacing your tone. Felix sighed.

'Trust Hyunjin. He knows what he's talking about. I know it's scary and all, one of us being sick for the first time, but I'm sure he is right. There is no doubt in my heart that his diagnosis is incorrect. So trust him,' Felix urged.

'I do but…' you began, hesitating for a moment, 'but how can he look like that, be so sick… just because of.. love… is it… it's… because of me, right?'

'Oh baby,' he said with a chuckle, taking you into his arms and hugging you tightly.

'None of this is your fault, and no one could've ever seen this coming. We only just found out too, even Hyunjin had a hard time placing his finger on it,' Felix said in a comforting tone.

'But how can he be that sick?' you pressed on worriedly. Felix let go of you, putting his hands on your shoulders once more and looking at you warmly.

'We might be gods, but we don't know everything, you know,' he said with a chuckle. 'Honestly, I don't know why he is as sick as he is, and why he is the only one,' Felix admitted truthfully, looking thoughtful, 'but I know illnesses and I know they can affect different beings in very different ways, even if they are the same species. Besides, it's what Hyunjin always says; the power love holds over all things is severely underestimated. I've seen many pets miraculously cured of diseases that I personally had diagnosed and pronounced terminal, just because of the love they got from their humans. Mind you, of course, that's not for every pet, and that doesn't mean they don't get enough love but-' he added, but seeing your face he quickly stopped and cleared his throat. 'Anyhow, what I was saying is that, as Jinnie always persists, love has more power than we realize and works in mysterious ways.' Felix ended.

'He will get better,' you said, stating it to convince yourself.

'He will get better,' Felix said definitely. 'And he is already getting better as a matter of fact. Just when you left I noticed his heartbeat seemed to be getting back to normal and even his color and scent seemed to be slowly returning to its original state,' Felix said seriously but with a smile.

You nodded.

'Now, no more dawdling because Han will give me an earful, as soon as his voice is recovered, if I do not get you to your next lesson on time,' he laughed. You couldn't help but chuckle a bit at his remark. He let go of your shoulders, and one of his hands took hold of your chin.

'Can I see your pretty smile one more time before you leave?' he asked sweetly. You smiled for him, a real smile and a bit of warmth seemed to return to your insides. 'That's my baby,' he grinned. He bent towards you, planting a soft kiss on your lips before withdrawing again. You could instantly feel yourself blushing. 'Just making sure I won't get sick as well,' he teased. You pouted at him and he winked, letting go of your face and waving you goodbye as you walked up to the school.

'WHYYYYYY are you not just addicted to your phone like the rest of us,' an irritated voice spoke. Before you could look around, you were being jumped, an arm around your neck pulling you into a headlock.

'Sera!' you said her name, laughing but trying to get free.

'No! I told you I would kill you when you'd get back, so get it girl,' she laughed, rubbing her hand over your hair and messing it up. You squealed and giggled, trying to get loose but she wouldn't let go until she was satisfied.

'There,' she said huffing as she let go of you, putting her hands on her hips and looking at your messed up hair proudly, 'totally killed your vibe.'

'I guess I had it coming,' you chuckled, trying to flatten your hair again with your hands.

'Yes, you did. And after my lecture yesterday, you still didn't react to my messages this morning,' Sera said, tutting and shaking her head like a disappointed parent.

'Oh, shit, Sera I'm sorry,' you said, quickly pulling out your phone and checking it. You indeed had quite a few unread messages. Sera sighed but smiled.

'It's fine,' she said, waving her hand dismissively. 'I'm just happy you're here and you're fine. Wanna have lunch then?' she asked, pointing with her thumb over her shoulder in the direction of the cafeteria. You nodded.

'Where's Adam? You asked her, looking around but not spotting his blonde hair anywhere.

'Class,' Sera said simply, pulling up her nose and shrugging.

The two of you made your way to the cafeteria, chatting about her weekend. By the time you got seated and started eating, the conversation slowly shifted to your weekend.

'So erm, how did your weekend end?' Sera asked, suddenly sounding apprehensive. You looked up, a feeling of suspicion instantly upon you.

'Why do you ask?' You said, slightly sharper than you had intended to. Sera looked away for a second. You could see her chewing the inside of her cheek thoughtfully for a second, an expression on her face that seemed almost doubtful.

'I…' she began, pausing for a moment, then hesitantly continuing as she straightened her back, 'I incidentally saw you arriving this morning. My class was boring and you just happened to be right outside of my window,' she added quickly, hesitating and pausing again. 'I saw you with some guy- a different one I mean,' she said meaningfully, 'Don't get me wrong,' she quickly added, putting her hands up. 'I mean, I just,' she said, her face suddenly becoming quite pink. 'I'm a curious person, okay?' she insisted, her cheeks blushing and nervously scooting over the bench. You could feel yourself holding your breath. 'It's just- I'm normally very good at reading people, but you… You're different. Good different though! Not like I think you're an alien or something,' she giggled nervously. You had never seen Sera like this before. You knew her to be a confident person, resolute. But you wouldn't be thrown off by her behavior, holding your mouth shut and keeping a face of steel. 'It's just, you're a bit unlike other girls our age you know. As I said, for one, you're not addicted to your phone and stuff,' she said, smiling awkwardly and pausing again. Then she suddenly sighed. 'Uhg okay, I'mma just come out with it,' she said suddenly. Your heart felt like it stopped.

'Are you poly?'

'Wh-What?' you asked, blinking.

'You know, polyamourous. In more than one relationship. Like multiple boyfriends,' she pressed on, looking eager now. You scanned her face. This was what she had known, what she had been asking about, hinting at, fishing for. It hadn't been about you, or your divinity, nor the boys or their powers. This was all.

You suddenly started to laugh, unable to help yourself. The apprehension, caution, and fear instantly slipped away from you. She could be trusted. It was safe. You knew. Your Goddess knew.

Sera looked at you uncomfortably, probably slightly startled by your burst of laughter and still waiting anxiously for you to respond.

'I'm sorry,' you chuckled, seeing her stressed face, 'I know what it means, it was just really unexpected that you asked,' you began.

'I'm so sorry,' Sera said quickly. 'I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions, it's just, people and relationships really interest me and I might've watched just one too many dramas and-,' she rattled but you quickly cut her off.

'No Sera, it's fine,' you said as you stopped chuckling and gave her a reassuring smile. You were sure you could tell her. You could see her light now. See it was dim like the other humans, but pure and safe. 'Yes. Yes, you're right,' you answered her question.

Sera looked at you with big eyes and slowly a smug smile appeared on her face.

'I knew it! I swear I fucking knew it. Adam wouldn't listen to me. I mean he doesn't know, I didn't tell him, I was just fishing for information, but that boy can't take a hint,' she said, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. 'But ever since I saw you with Mr. Hwang and then when you left with the other guy at that birthday party,' she said, giving you a meaningful look that told you she had known what you and Minho had been up to back then, 'and then the others. I mean I swear every single time was coincidental okay. It's not like I'm some weird creep who's spying on you, but it just turned out that way, honestly. I wasn't sure if I should say anything because you weren't saying anything and-' Sera babbled on. Clearly, she was completely in her element.

'Well, it is kind of an awkward topic to talk about I guess,' you said truthfully. She instantly shut her mouth and looked at you.

'Oh shit, sorry. You want me to shut up?' she asked quickly. You shook your head smiling.

'Nah, it's fine. Actually, I think it would be nice finally being able to talk to someone about it, to be honest,' you said truthfully.

'Oh thank god, good. Okay,' she said, bending over to you eagerly, 'gimme all the deets.'

'Well, erm, I don't know where to start,' you said, frowning, thinking.

'Okay, so I figured it's at least four or something right?' she said eagerly.

'Erm, eight actually,' you admitted.

'EIGHT?' she exclaimed loudly, her eyes growing big. You kicked her under the table.

'Shut it!' you hissed but giggled, 'I mean I'm fine with you knowing but I don't need the whole school to know.'

'Right, right, right, sorry,' she said, rubbing her painful shin but still looking eager. 'So I guess that means it's all of your roommates then, isn't it?' she asked. You nodded. Sera mouthed a silent "Wow".

'But eight? Really? Isn't that like,' she raised her eyebrows meaningfully and continued in a whisper, 'a lot of work.' You felt yourself blush and she wiggled her eyebrows, leaning back in her seat, your change of color apparently giving her enough of an answer.

'You know, good for you,' she said, putting her hand up in an okay sign and looking smug. 'I mean I can't even deal with one knucklehead now and then, but eight… Pfft kudos to you,' she chuckled.

'Don't you… find it weird?' you asked, feeling awkward yourself now as well. Sera raised her brows and this time it was her turn to laugh at your question.

'Honey, you're asking an adopted pansexual girl with an interracial lesbian immigrant couple as parents. Nothing is weird to me,' she shrugged.

It was hard to believe she really didn't think it was weird, but she seemed to be more curious than judgemental regarding the situation.

The rest of the break she spent bombarding you with eager questions about your relationship with the boys and the dynamics in the house.

By the time the bell rang for your next class, Sera wasn't done asking questions yet.

'I really have to go to class now,' you laughed as you saw Sera racking her brain for another question she could ask quickly before you'd go. Sera pouted.

'You know you can always text me, right?' you chuckled as you got up from your seat and gathered your belongings.

'It's not like you'd answer anyways,' Sera said sticking her tongue out at you playfully. You laughed and were just about to turn around when she grabbed your arm.

'Wait!' She said quickly, sounding eager.

'Wha-hat? I have to goooo,' you said impatiently as many others were leaving.

'Let's go on a double date!' Sera suggested enthusiastically.

'I-what?' you said, taken aback by her question.

'A double date. Or, wait, what do you call it when it's with multiple people? Okay never mind,' she said quickly when she saw your face. 'But please, let's do it. I swear it'll be fun! We can get to know each other, make friends,' she suggested. When she saw your doubtful face she continued. 'Come on, I bet you've never been able to go somewhere on a date with all of them. I promise we'll pick somewhere busy, that way you won't stand out too much.'

You hesitated. You had been to places with all of them, of course. But never really on a date…

'We could do the funfair! It's always super crowded and no one will notice, trust me. The weekend after next? Saturday at eight. We'll meet you at the entrance.'

Before you could object, Sera grabbed your hand and shook it before running off with the leaving masses, leaving you behind slightly bewildered.

You blinked a few times and then chuckled. Sera was unlike anyone you had ever met. But it was nice having a human friend with whom you could be more open and trusting. It'd be nice to feel normal for a bit.

Minho was already standing by the car, waiting to take you home from school. Seeing him from a distance made your heart pound faster. Not just because he always looked so dashing in his brown suit, gray hair, and glasses, but because you were a little scared. He had been sweet to you this morning like he always was, but you had failed him as a goddess. You know how much he treasured you and knew how much you being his goddess meant to him, and you were scared he'd be mad at you for what you had done, or more so the lack thereof. You also knew how much Han meant to him and what it would do to him to see Han so sickly. With all of these thoughts swirling in your head, you took a deep breath and walked up to him.

You were slightly surprised to see that the dark circles around his eyes seemed to have almost disappeared. He looked healthier somehow, even though he'd had a long day of working.

'Hi Lino,' you said with a small voice as you approached him. He gave you a smile and a curt nod, holding the door open for you as you got into the car, but he didn't say anything.

During most of the drive, he was silent, and your heart started to sink again, lower and lower with every silent minute that passed by.

You were just about to say something, anything to break the silence. An apology or any words that could comfort him, tell him you were sorry and would never forgive yourself for what you had done when he suddenly spoke.

'It's not your fault you know,' he said suddenly and softly. You looked over at him somewhat startled. This was the last thing you expected him to say.

'I-what?' you said, feeling dumbstruck.

'You know it's not your fault right?' Minho repeated. 'None of us could've ever seen this coming,' he elaborated. You were silent for a second.

'But it is my fault,' you whispered, looking down at your lap, your heart sinking once more. Minho clicked his tongue.

'If you really wanna blame yourself, go ahead, but know that we don't,' he said simply. 'Honestly, we blame ourselves for not realizing what a mess we are without you,' he added softly. You weren't sure how to respond. You felt quite sheepish, staring out of the window, looking at the streets you passed by. 'We should've known we can't be without you anymore... And we should've called you to come back,' he said, then suddenly he clicked his tongue angrily, smacking his hands irritably against the steering wheel. 'I should've never listened to him!' He said with a sudden intensity, his eyes straight on the road. 'I begged him to call you, but he wouldn't let me. I could barely convince him to let Felix check him out. I don't know how Felix managed to convince him to let Hyunjin check on him as well…' Minho said, grabbing the steering wheel hard until his knuckles went white. You looked at him in shock. You couldn't remember if you had ever seen him so angry. 'He should've just let me call you,' he repeated with clenched teeth. 'It would've never gotten as far as it had. I know he's fine now, but he looked like dog shit,' he grumbled. His anger seemed to die down and he sighed, putting on his blinker and taking a right turn.

You were surprised with Minho's anger, which seemed to be directed at himself. This was not what you expected. You suddenly realized that the look on his face was nothing but a mirror of your own feelings; disappointment, annoyance, and anger, all directed at himself. You wanted to help him, to comfort him, but how could you, as you had no way of stopping yourself from feeling the same way.

'He's doing better now?' you repeated with a small voice, a lame attempt at making him feel better even though you barely did.

'Yeah, he is,' Minho said with a nod. He sounded calm again. You could see him straightening his shoulders and letting out a quiet sigh, as if to breathe out his feelings, before he started speaking again. 'He called me during the break and he seems to be back to normal again,' he said.

'He called you?' you asked, feeling hurt that Han hadn't contacted you in any way.

'Yeah, video call. He looked quite normal again, so don't worry about it, okay? It really wasn't your fault,' Minho said once more. But his words simply made you feel shittier. The fact that Han hadn't contacted you broke your heart. Was he angry with you? But Minho said they didn't blame you, even though you did yourself. Why hadn't he called you? Why?

'Han?' You knocked on his door softly, but there was no response. You knocked again, calling louder this time. Still, no response. You sighed, withdrawing your hand from the door and turning around. But just when you were about to take another step, you changed your mind. You knew Han was in there. You were sure. And according to all the other guys, he was doing fine now, almost like nothing ever happened. And Minho had assured you he wasn't mad at you, although you were mad at yourself. But you knew your heart would not be at ease until you saw him.

You turned around to face the door again. Maybe he was asleep. Maybe that's why he hadn't answered. You could imagine he hadn't slept too well for several days and now that he was better, it might've finally caught up to him.

You weren't one to go into other's rooms if they weren't there. You never really snooped, nor entered without their permission. But this time you didn't care. You had to see him for yourself. You had to be sure he was doing alright.

Slowly and quietly you turned the handle, opening the door to peek inside.

Han was sitting on his bed, his back turned to you as he seemed to be staring out of the window.

'Hannie?' you said his name softly, scared to startle him. He turned his head towards your voice but stopped halfway, showing he was listening but not responding, nor looking at you.

You bit your lip and walked over to him, but as soon as you got close to him he turned his face away from you. You stopped in your tracks, hesitating for a moment. No, you need to talk to him. Pushing through your anxiety you went to sit next to him on the bed.

'Hannie?' you said, repeating his name in a steadier voice this time. He still didn't look at you. You needed to make contact. You could feel your inner Goddess, like she was tapping you on the shoulder, asking you to give her space. You took a deep breath, in and out, and opened your mind.

Although his light shone bright, there was a certain dimness to it. Carefully, you took his hand into yours, caressing it with your thumb.

'I am sorry, Hannie,' you spoke softly, 'for letting you down. For not being there, and not doing my duty properly as your goddess.'

Finally, he turned his face to yours. His green eyes looked at you incredulously.

'How could you say such a thing?' he whispered, shaking his head and frowning. He grabbed the hand that you had used to stroke his tightly with both of his hands. 'Don't you ever say that again,' he said almost angrily. 'Don't you know how it hurts us when you are hurting?' he spoke.

You gave him a sad smile, squeezing his hands for a moment. As Minho had said, he hadn't blamed you for a second.

Suddenly he let go of your hands and turned his face away from yours again.

'It's me…' he whispered suddenly. 'I am the problem… I am… weak.' He said the words painfully, clearly disgusted with himself. It broke your heart. Tears welled up in your eyes.

'Don't you ever say that again,' you repeated his words back to him, your voice trembling with the pain you felt for him.

Han simply huffed, his eyes still locked on the floor. 'You know it's true y/n,' he said bitterly. 'I am weak. I was the only one who got sick, the only one affected so ridiculously. None of the other boys were even close to… my state of being,'

'But they were all sick,' you stopped him before he could continue. 'They told me none of them were feeling right. Everyone was unwell in their own way. Maybe you just didn't see because-'

'-Because I was the sickest of them all?' Han interrupted you. He scoffed. 'Yeah, like I said, none of them were close to being as "lovesick" as I was. Clearly, I am the weakest of the bunch,' he said angrily. 'I mean, I guess I've always known it. I mean look at them, look at their cool powers. Lino being time itself, Chan taking care of souls, Seungmin making this planet liveable, Hyunjin making life worth living. I mean I could go on, but it's clear all their powers are way cooler and way more important than mine. I mean what do I do? I talk to plants. So what? Big deal. Nothing cool or sexy about it. I should just-'

'Han Jisung!' You said his name so loudly and suddenly that he jumped. He instantly turned his head to face you once more, looking at you with big watery green eyes. You had never used his first name with him. From day one he had always been "Han" by his own request or "Hannie" since it sounded like the pet name "Honey" which he enjoyed. 'I won't allow you to talk about yourself like that,' you said sternly. Han simply scowled and was about to look away again when you grabbed both of his hands tightly and continued talking.

'You are everything,' you said to him slowly in a lowered voice, the words now coming from your heart. A small crease appeared between his brows and you continued. 'You are every breath we inhale and exhale. You are the light that keeps us warm and the shade that shelters us. You are the water we drink and the blue skies that we see. You are life,' you said insistently and seriously. You could see Han's jaw tightening, a habit he adopted from Chan. 'You are all of the others, as they are you. And without you, they wouldn't and couldn't be.' Your voice almost turned into a whisper and you paused for a second. You knew he was listening. Not just him, but his aethereal self. You could see how his light responded to your words. But his pained expression and self-doubt weren't gone yet.

'Without you, I wouldn't be,' you whispered to him, softly squeezing his hands. His face started to relax somewhat now. The painful knot in your chest that seemed to mirror his own lessened, even though your watery eyes weren’t dry just yet.

'Hannie,' you said his name once more, his sweet name that you loved to speak so much. His lips quivered for a moment. 'I can still remember back when I wasn't aware yet… The first time I saw your gift…' you said, the words suddenly feeling so emotional that they were hard to speak. 'I remember seeing you, just through the crack of the door, seeing you make that beautiful flower bloom,' you pointed over your shoulder at the plant on his drawers next to the door. 'It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen,' you whispered as a tear rolled down your face. Han looked at you, his brows slightly raised now, as his eyes were filling with tears too.

'You give life, Hannie,' you said, letting go of his hands and catching a tear on his cheek with your pinky finger. 'How can you forget that?'

'I-I haven't, I just-,' Han stammered as more tears fell from his face.

'You don't have to be cool or sexy. You don't have to be strong either,' you added. 'You just have to be you. You have to remember who you are, what you are. Don't let those human emotions get in your way of knowing how special you are,' you said, shaking your head.

Han nodded in response. The tears that were falling from his face seemed to contain the darkness that was covering his light. You looked into him, seeing his light shining brighter than ever as he softly smiled at you. You smiled back at him and sighed deeply. Your goddess retreated into the shadows once more, knowing that the job was done. You lean over to him, putting your forehead against his, noses aligned and touching. You felt yourself breathing in his scent, and the tears in your eyes finally seemed to dry.

'I've been such a fool, my love,' Han whispered. You smiled softly, your heads still touching. 'I let envy and frustration overtake me. You're right. I guess I forgot who I was there for a moment.'

You slowly withdrew your face from his, smiling at him and seeing him smile at you.

'It's okay Hannie, that's what I'm here for,' you said kindly to him.

'I know, but still, I was acting a little dramatic I guess,' Han said with a sheepish grin, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. 'Having a human part of us sometimes is a little-' he spoke, but suddenly stopped. He turned his head away from you, looked at the door, and frowned. He blinked a few times, then turned his head again, looking at the wall that was separating his room from Minho's. Han raised an eyebrow.

'Han? What is happening?' You asked, feeling apprehensive. Han put up a hand to silence you as he stared at the wall for another second before he looked down at the floor. He scoffed for a moment and then suddenly started laughing.

'Han what-?' you asked again, getting kind of concerned now. But he wasn't listening.

'No way,' he whispered to himself, getting up from the bed, and, for a moment, totally seeming to forget you. He walked a few paces, still looking down, before stopping again and chuckling once more. 'No way!' he laughed before looking at you again with a wide grin.

Startled by his unexpected reaction, you pulled at your goddess for help, but you instantly felt that it would be no use as if you had used up all of your credits for the day. You got up too now.

'Han, what-?' you repeated taking a few steps before it suddenly dawned on you. Han still didn't respond but simply grinned at you. 'Oh,' you breathed. Han simply nodded, understanding that you understood.

WRITERS NOTE

Thank you all so much for your continuous support. I understand that you had to wait for a long time but I simply have too little time to write. 

I try my best to write when I can, and your encouragement, kind words, and fun reactions really make me happy<3

However, I'd like to ask some of you to please understand that rushing or pushing me won't make things go faster and will only make me feel bad :(

I have been working on this series for over two years already, and I am currently working on Chapter 50 (!).

Although I really do love this story, it has been quite difficult, tiring, and time-consuming work (for me as well as for my lovely editors) at some times. I love writing a lot and I post this story for free on multiple platforms because I want everyone to be able to enjoy reading this for free as I too know all too well what it's like to have no money to spare for your hobby or favorite artist (life is expensive ya'll, I know that)

So please, if you enjoy my story, give it a vote or a nice comment, and trust that I will come back with a new chapter for you to love, even though it might take longer than you'd like (trust me, it takes me longer than I would like as well). 

Please remember, that creativity cannot be forced or rushed.

Once again, thank you all so much for all the love, votes and comments, and trust that I will be back with more. I appreciate every single one of you <3

Lots of Love

Dolly

[winepresswrath]

hi! i always love your MDZS/CQL takes; can i ask what are the questions you think CQL is asking, as compared to MDZS?

I haven't actually revisited either canon in ages, which is making me nervous. what questions the novel is interested in can be pretty contentious all on its own! @mikkeneko has an excellent answer in the notes here which I reccomend to everyone. My own thoughts are honestly pretty scattered- I keep on deleting things and going hm, that's not quite right.

So, for the obvious-to-me example, people reasonably zero in on the creation of innocent doctors/radish farmers who Wen Ruohan is holding hostage. In CQL it's easy to infer that Wen Qing and Wen Ning are maybe the only cultivators and almost certainly the only combatants among the Wen remnants, and their status is much more ambiguous in the novel, which I personally think is asking, essentially, "and so what? were they wrong to run, when they had a chance? Do they deserve what Jin Guangshan will do to them if they go back? Aren't they just people, actually?" Whereas the question that CQL is asking is more to the effect of "What does Wen Qing owe these people, when she is their only defence? What is she entitled to do to save them, at other people's expense? If she fucks up that moral calculus, what then? Does it matter if she's personally fond of some of the outsiders who are going to get hurt? If one of them saved her brother? Later, this question will flip to what Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng, and the parallel to Jiang Cheng's situation in particular is, I think, genuinely pretty fun. You're giving up the Wen as soldiers who've laid down their arms in exchange for Wen Qing also grappling with leadership and the question of how many horrors she can stand to look the other way on to protect her own people. one reason I keep deleting so much is that a lot cql's changes were motivated at least in part by censorship, which I think we mostly share a general and justified distaste for! but I also think that within the bounds of that censorship the creative team put a lot of work into actually doing something interesting with those changes. Or, for another example- nieyao! There's a much greater emphasis on the nmj-jgy relationship, it's unambiguously very close and they are clearly extremely important to one another, and I think that's because the cql team has a lot to say about love, trust, power, and the ways those things interact, and that reflects back on all of the other relationships in play, including Wangxian. Almost every time, when CQL chooses change a relationship they make the characters in question closer- that's true for Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, for Wen Qing and the Yunmeng contingent, for Zixuan and Mianmian, and Huaisang and Meng Yao. It's even true for Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, who have a close and trusting relationship in first life! CQL puts a much greater emphasis on "all right, so you care, what next?" How do you choose someone and then choose to be good to them? What if there's a massive power disparity between you? What if you seriously disagree about your priorities and morals? How do you trust someone who's betrayed you? When is it a stupid choice to trust at all? How do you have faith that you know someone well enough for that trust to be meaningful?

for legal reasons i would like to specify that it's not that mdzs isn't interested in these problems. i do remember wangxian's literal trust fall. cql is asking these questions all the time about everyone. also for legal purposes i'm not suggesting that cql lwj and jc love each other. but! they establish a three month wartime partnership looking for wwx and then jc immediately drops him on wwx's say-so despite apparently having a positive enough opinion of him to tell wwx he thinks they should make up twice. lan wangji will later tell wwx he thinks he should loop jc in on the second flautist! these are people trying to navigate some kind of relationship/shared interest/community, as opposed to a hateful void. cql wants to say hey, how do you go about this? while I'm here and rambling cql also puts a lot of emphasis on wwx's connection to yunmeng and changes things up so instead of feeling alienated right before he leaves our last glimpse of him there is happily picking lotuses and playing with a kid! in both stories the narrative is asking who do you protect? who do you leave behind? can you ever get it back? but the angles are very different.

[sskk-manifesto]

(´･ᴗ･ ` )

[aro-ortega]

i think it would be funny if in the future daniel + julia try to convince sasja to give polyamory/them as a throuple a shot