#louise b halfe

[hedgehog-moss]

Various ways in which I have underestimated my chickens (callout post to myself):

cognitive abilities (memory): I dropped some pasta while making a salad earlier and Louise was nearby so I opened the door and invited her into the kitchen to come clean up. At first she just meandered round the room glaring suspiciously at furniture because she's unfamiliar with the inside of my house, then I helped her locate the pasta and she pounced, but before she could eat all of them Morille came zooming across the room with Pandolf zooming behind her, which freaked out the hen who noisily flew-ran out of the room. She stayed away long enough that when I called her inside again I expected her to have forgotten all about the pasta, and that I would have to show it to her again, but instead she went straight for it, resolutely, having clearly kept this important goal in a corner of her teeny tiny mind this whole time.

hunting abilities: before getting chickens I didn't realise they actually hunted? (sometimes.) I pictured their search for food as quiet foraging, busily scratching the dirt for worms, but a) hens are never quiet they're always chattering to each other so already that part was wrong; b) when they find a worthy prey they hunt it with the fierce determination of a mountain lion. I once saw Dru chasing a grasshopper across half the pasture, running at full chicken speed and sometimes boosting herself with her wings Mario kart-style while the grasshopper desperately hopped for its life, until eventually she pounced with her beak wide open and managed to catch it mid-jump. With an action movie soundtrack this scene would have been every bit as intense and gripping as a cheetah hunting a gazelle in a wildlife documentary.

social abilities (empathy): one time Cordélia had a little bit of grass stuck in her eye and she kept rubbing her head with her claw to try and dislodge it unsuccessfully, and then she seemingly asked Dru for help, placing her face very close to the other hen's face like "see that stupid twig?" and Dru removed it with her beak. Again that's not something I would have expected from a hen... they're very disloyal creatures, so it was fascinating to see. They would stab their grandma for a dusty rigatoni but leaving a friend with something stuck in her eye is apparently a level of antisocial even chickens won't cross.

social abilities pt.2 (romantic sensibility): sometimes when the night sky is clear and you can see the Milky Way, instead of tucking themselves in at sundown like they usually do, they'll fly to the roof of their coop and sit there for a little while to watch the stars together. Okay this one may be a tiny bit less scientific an observation than the others but I don't have an explanation for this behaviour; I've never noticed anything wrong with their coop on these particular nights, the door is open, they can go in—and the girls don't seem stressed at all, if anything they look like they're having a nice peaceful moment and I feel bad for bothering them.

[and-claudia]

Yours pt. 2 (Paddy x reader) (Speak No Evil)

Okay for now I'm just calling this miniseries Yours until I find a title I actually like.

Warnings: Paddy (he is a warning himself), manipulation, age gap, mentions of death, controlling relatives, lies, lots of lies, mentions of p in v sex, morning after pill, you think Paddy is being sweet but its mostly all manipulating

This story will get dark. this is your warning, this part isn't really that dark

Word Count: 3200+

Taglist (Read the rules, follow them or I will remove your response)

I woke up at some point, feeling something on the inside of my leg. When my eyes slowly opened, the room was mostly dark with just a soft glow coming from the bathroom door that was half open.

“Sorry, darling. Didn’t mean to wake you. Just wanted to get you at least semi-cleaned up.” He said from where he was sitting beside me, gently wiping away the evidence of our time together earlier in the night. 

He had put on a pair of sweats, but I was still lying on top of the sheets, completely naked. A small shiver ran down my back, causing me to wrap my arms around myself. 

“Here, put this on.” He said, handing me what I could only assume was one of his shirts. 

“Thanks.” I said, sitting up as he finished wiping off part of my leg. 

I put the shirt on, relishing in how it smelt like him, before looking over at him, “What time is it?” 

“Early. You can go back to sleep.” He said. 

I nodded, “Imma go to the bathroom first.” I said, turning to get up off the bed. 

“Ciria’s makeup wipes are in there if you need some.” He said as I walked off, and I gave him a nod. 

I went and did my business. Honestly I was surprised and quite frankly curious as to how he had managed to clean me up so well without me waking up sooner, considering how much of a mess there was between my legs when I fell asleep. However, I was too tired to question it too much. Once I was done, I washed my hands and found the makeup wipes he had mentioned. I quickly wiped off whatever wake was left on my face from both sweating at the club and jumping into the pool. 

When I came back out, Paddy had moved from his spot on the bed to the chair in the corner. 

“There’s something on the side table for you.” He said, nodding to the one closer to me. 

On it sat a water bottle and a box of Plan B. 

“I know you said you were on birth control, but better to be safe than sorry.” He said. 

I nodded and grabbed the box, “No, I agree, thanks.” I said before taking it. 

The sheets had been pulled back, clearly indicating that he was okay with me sleeping under them rather than on top like I had been earlier. However, he wasn’t making any moves to join me. 

“Are you coming back to bed?” I asked. 

“I wasn’t sure if that would be okay with you… I didn’t want to cross any boundaries.” He said with what I would’ve sworn was a nervous laugh, but Paddy didn’t seem like the type of man to ever get nervous, especially in the bedroom. 

“Paddy, I am pretty fucking sure you bruised my cervix last night… I don’t think we have boundaries…” I said. 

He laughed a little at my comment but still stood from his chair and came to join me on the other side of the bed. Once he was settled in, I scooted over to him and looked up at him from where my head was resting on his chest. 

“I meant what I said… if you truly want me, I’m yours, Paddy.” I said. 

He didn’t respond verbally. Instead, he just leaned down and kissed me gently. I responded immediately, returning the kiss before a yawn forced me to pull away. Paddy laughed to himself and smiled at me. 

“Get some rest, baby.” He said gently. 

We finally woke up a few hours later. Our families had plans for brunch at a cafe a few blocks away and we both needed to get up and get ready for that. Paddy got up and got dressed fairly quickly after deciding to lie to Ben and Louise, saying that I had gotten sick on my dress and needed a change of clothes to get dressed over here. 

3rd person PoV

Paddy walked through the halls of the hotel until he got to the room where Yn’s aunt and uncle were staying. He knocked twice, then waited. Louise opened the door and was shocked to find Paddy there. 

“Hi, Paddy… where’s Yn?” She asked, clearly worried for his niece. 

“Oh, you fret far too much over her, Louise. Don’t worry, she and Ciria are back in our room. I think she was getting in the shower when I stopped by.” Paddy said. 

“Stopped by?” Louise asked, confused as she leaned against the doorframe. 

“Yes, when we got back, it was quite late. We didn’t want to bother you, so I let her and Cira take our room. It was a king-sized bed and the two of them seemed to really be hitting it off and didn’t seem to mind having to share. I slept on the floor in the room we got Ant.” 

“He has his own room?” She asked. 

“Yes, it’s across the hall. Kinda hard to enjoy certain aspects of your vacation with your kid 5 feet away from you, if you know what I mean.” He said with a laugh as Louise smiled politely, but it was clear she was uncomfortable, “Anyways… I came by to check that our brunch plans were still a go?” 

Lousie looked back into the room to Ben, who just shrugged. 

“Yeah, we’re just about to get ready.” She said after turning back to Paddy.

“Perfect! I also came by to get Yn’s clothes… she got a little sick on her dress. And so she asked me to come by and get her clothes for her. She wrote down what she needed on here.” He said, handing the note to her. 

Lousie looked at it and was a little confused. It listed the sundress she wanted, her makeup bag, what she needed to do her makeup, the jewelry she wanted and where it was in her bag, and what shoes she wanted… but that was it. It lacked any undergarments of any kind. 

“O-okay. One second…” She said, pushing the door shut. 

“What’s that?” Ben asked, seeing the note in her hand. 

“The clothes Yn needs… she threw up on her dress or something, so she’s going to get ready with Ciria in their room, I guess.” She said, walking past him to get to Yn’s suitcase. 

She collected everything that was requested but hesitated, seeing her undergarment bag… maybe she had just forgotten to write it down. The dress she was asked for wasn’t form-fitting; it was nice and flowy, so she shouldn’t have to worry about lines if she wore underwear. After some debate, she grabbed the first pair from the bag, not wanting to invade her privacy, and folded it up into the dress. She put everything into a small bag and went back to the door to Paddy. 

“Here, that’s everything she asked for… I put a few things she didn’t ask for as well, like her uh- her daily medications, purse, toothbrush, that type of stuff…I just figured she forgot to write that down.” Louse said, handing it to him. 

“Thank you. I will let her know. And I will see you lot later!” He said before walking off. 

He got back to his room just as Yn was getting out of the shower. He knocked on the bathroom door and handed her the bag, which she thanked him for with a small kiss. 

He then went and grabbed some clothes for Ciria before walking across the hall to give them to her. 

“Can’t I come back over and get ready with you?” Ciria asked as he handed her the clothes. 

“No, Yn is still there. Get ready here, and get the kid ready, too. We have brunch with the Daltons.” He said. 

“Why is she still there?” She pressed, a pang of jealousy laced in her voice. 

Paddy didn’t reply. He just sent her a look that warned her to quit asking questions. 

“Sorry, I’ll go get ready.” She said, and he nodded once in approval. 

“Remember, all three of us went out last night, and you and Yn slept in the other room. You go along with anything I or Yn say. She believes we do this all the time, I told her that you wanted me to have the night with her. You go along with that. Got it?” He asked, making sure she went along with the string of lies he told Ben and Louise. 

“Yes, sir.” She said before closing the door to get ready.

Yn’s PoV 

Soon, everyone was ready, and we were waiting for my aunt, uncle, and cousin. To tell the truth, I was sad when Ciria and Ant joined us. It was nice pretending it was just Paddy and I, but I had to remind myself that he had a wife and kid, I was just his fun vacation side piece for now. Then, when I saw my family, it felt like even that was ripped away. 

“Everyone ready?” Ciria asked, holding onto Paddy’s arm, to say I wasn’t a little jealous would be a lie. 

“Yeah, I think so.” Louise said, and we all began walking to the restaurant. 

“So, did you have fun last night, Yn?” Ben asked while we sat down waiting for our food.

“Yeah.” I said with a shrug. 

“Still a bit tired, I bet. We had a pretty crazy night.” Paddy said, “Right girls?” 

“Yes. Oh Yn was so much fun to dance with! I wish you all didn’t live so far. I would kill for girls' nights with her… and of course you, Louise.” Ciria said, much to my surprise. 

“I would love that.” I said with a smile over at her. 

Paddy was sat between us. Since it was a round table, there was no real way to separate the two families, not that I was complaining. His knee kept grazing mine under the table, and I was trying not to let myself wonder if it was on purpose or accident. It wasn’t until he leaned forward to tell my uncle something and his hand landed on my leg that I knew it was on purpose. I watched him as he spoke, unable to keep the smile from my face. Until a name brought my attention to my uncle. 

“Me and my brother Brandon used to work together years and years ago.” Ben said. 

“18 years ago.” I corrected him. 

He sighed, “Yeah, 18 years ago…” 

“Oh, what happened? Did you have a falling out?” Paddy asked, seemingly unaware of the tension building between my uncle and me.

“He died.” I said bluntly, “He and his wife, my mother. I was only three. They were in the car, heading to Ben’s place to meet his new girlfriend. I was staying with my grandparents. A drunk driver hit them head-on.” I said, staring at the mimosa I had ordered. 

I picked it up and downed it in one go before excusing myself from the table. Ben never talked about him around me. I wasn’t sad. I was pissed. Everytime he talked about my dad it was a slap in the face that he had actually got to remember him and have memories of him, and I didn’t. And it was his fault. 

I had left the restaurant and went and sat on a bench a little ways down the road. Even though Paddy was there and I wanted to spend as much time with him before our paths parted but I had zero intentions on going back to that brunch. 

“Can I sit?” I heard his voice say cautiously as if speaking to an injured wild animal. 

“Sure… sorry for storming off.” I said, not looking at him. 

“It’s okay… Ben explained.” He said and scoffed. 

“What’d he say? That I still wasn’t over the untimely death of my parents? That I was sent to live with my oh so loving godfather?” I asked sarcastically. 

“Yeah, that’s pretty much it. He said he and Louise raised you, tried to get you to go to therapy to work through you feelings about what happened.” He said. 

I shook my head, “I don’t need therapy, not now at least. Louise only wanted me to go because Agnes goes and she’s into all that new age parenting. But I know exactly how I feel about it, now, and I got there without a fucking therapist.” 

I took a deep breath before explaining what really happened, “I was at my grandparents. Ben had invited my dad and mom to his apartment to meet the girl he had been dating, Louise. On the drive over, they got into a car accident. No one survived… it was their fault. If they weren’t going to his apartment then my parents would still be here.” 

Deep down I knew I sounded crazy. But it was the only way I could rationalize their death. 

“I’m sorry, darling. Come here.” He said opening his arms for me. 

I hugged and he held me close. 

“Then when Agnes was born, I was pretty much cast aside. Everything was about her because she’s their really daughter. And I was left to the sideline to watch her get the childhood they took away from me…I’m sorry, I know that makes me sound crazy probably…” I said when I pulled away. 

“Not at all.” He said much to my surprise. 

“Really?” 

“Yeah, I’ve seen how they treat you now. I think they realized their fuck up and are trying to reverse it now but its too little too late to try and parent you. What’s been done is done and they can’t undo what they did to you. I’m so sorry you were treated like that.” He said. 

“Thank you, Paddy. I’ve never really told anyone all of this and I was sure if I did they would think I was insane… by the way I’m not going back to that brunch. Fuck him. Feel free to go back. I’ll be fine.” I said, secretly hoping he would stay. 

“Well I told them I would go find you… and I think it’s taking a lot longer to find you than I expected. Come on lets get get something to eat.” He said with a smirk. 

Although I really liked that idea, part of me felt guilty about keeping him from his family. 

“I can’t keep you from your family, Paddy.” I said. 

“You can if I’m the one offering. Besides we only have a couple more days together. I intended to use every excuse I can to spend time with you.” He said, leaning over to kiss me. 

A pang of sadness hit me suddenly at that. I knew it was the truth, but I didn’t want to think about that. I knew the likely hood of me seeing him after this vacation were slim. 

“However…” He drew out the word, catching my attention, “After Ben told explained everything about what happened to you and how you all ended up moving and everything. I suggested you all come out to our farm for a bit. Give you a break from the city, get a change of scenery. I told it may do you some good, being out there with the fresh air.” 

“Seriously, when?” I asked, admittedly a bit too excited. 

“Whenever!” He said smiling at my enthusiasm, “I just need your help convince them to come out and see… for you to come see me.” 

“I will.” I promised. 

“Good, now, how about that lunch, hm?” He asked raising an eyebrow and offering me his hand. I nodded with a smile and took his hand before we stood together and he walked us further away from where everyone else was having brunch as we went off to do our own thing. 

In the following days I spent as much time as I could with Paddy. Any excuse I could think of to get close to him I went with. At one point I even agreed to play chicken fight in the pool with Agnes on my shoulders while Paddy had Ant on his. But when the day came for us to leave I was overcome by sadness. Paddy made me feel seen and made me feel more alive that I’ve ever felt before. And now I was leaving that behind back to being the bane of my uncles existence. 

As we came down from our room with our bags, Paddy, Ciria and Ant were all there to see us off. I smiled when I saw him and his smile grew even more when they landed on me. I had secrently kept the shirt he had let me sleep in after the night at the club and I was wearing it right now. 

I waited as everyone else said bye to one another. I gave Ciria a hug telling her I hoped that we could visit soon and her and I could hang out more. I even gave Ant a small side hug telling him Agnes and I had fun playing with him and his dad in the pool. Then I got my turn with Paddy. 

“Oh come here.” He said, wrapping into a tight hug just had he had done with Louise. 

I hugged him back and took a long inhale of his scent knowing I wouldn’t be able to see him for awhile. 

“You look great wearing my clothes… god I’m going to miss you, and your perfect cunt.” He said quietly so no one else would hear. 

I sighed, “I’m going to miss you too… don’t forget, I’m yours.” I whispered back, before pulling away. 

He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to my forehead, which didn’t seem too suspicious considering he gave Lousie a small peck on the cheek as well. 

“Here, let me help.” Paddy said grabbing my bag along with Agnes’s before following Ben and Louise out to the car. 

We got loaded up and drove away as I sat in silence in the back seat. My only hope was that I could convince my aunt and uncle to actually go out to the farm so I could see him again. 

Taglist

@dreamygirli3 @comicbookslut @dianaxx99 @one-of-thewalkingdead @moist-for-xavier @myartistrash02 @fairy-cores-world d @mayamidge

[intergalacticfop]

Minoan Kilt

The large, structural skirt worn by Minoan women in art is instantly recognizable, and when I made my own I combined current best guesses with my own personal tastes.

My kilt shape follows the hypothesis laid out by Bernice Jones in her book Ariadne's Threads: The Construction and Significance of Clothes in the Aegean Bronze Age. She describes the shape of that of a labrys, a double-headed axe with apparent ceremonial significance in Ancient Minoan culture. This garment may be depicted in Linear-B logogram *166 + we, we-being the backwards-s-shaped squiggle in the center which identifies the piece as a garment.

See pages 336 and 341 in Marie-Louise B. Nosch, The Textile Logograms in the Linear B Tablets

Actual details on construction and materials below the cut:

Construction:

The top and bottom edges of the kilt are concave, so the sides are longer than the middle. This gives the chevron-shape seen on layered kilts in art. In addition, the curved top half makes the skirt flare out, accommodating the hips and giving more freedom of movement to the legs. My kilt measured from my waist to my anklebone at the longest point, and about 1.5 times around my waist.

I chose to make a flounced kilt, with smaller strips of fabric and trim applied to a large base piece, rather than a tiered kilt, in which multiple kilt shapes of varying length are layered one on top of the other, so you end up wrangling 3 layers of fabric around the waist. The flounced kilt saves fabric and gives you a lot more freedom with whatever trim you might want. Jones' diagram for a flounced kilt is seen below:

Unlike the version in the diagram above, I chose not to attach ties to the garment itself both because the linen I used was very heavy and I was concerned about weight, and also because folding the skirt and securing it with a separate tie worked just fine for my tastes. In total I had four flounces: 2 alternating rows each of fabric and fringe.

The vertical edges of most kilts are left plain, probably representing either the selvage or an edge otherwise finished off to prevent fraying. For my kilt, however, I ended up with a couple inches of self-fringe on either side as I adjusted the fabric to the correct width. At least three examples of kilts with fringed vertical edges are known, all three from the so-called "House of the Ladies" in Akrotiri

Photos from Wikimedia Commons. Image 1. Image 2.

The vertical edges of these kilts are reinforced with a colored band or tape, probably to keep the garment from unintentional further fraying. Accordingly, I did the same on my kilt. I also like that it gave a nice vertical diagonal to counterbalance the horizontal ones.

Materials

I tried to use mainly linen and wool, the fibers most available on Ancient Crete, but some of my trim was cotton because sometimes you just have to use what's cheap and available in the today times.

The base of my kilt is a heavy, patterned linen in what's called a diaper weave, meaning that a repeating diamond pattern is woven into the pattern itself. A lot of the Minoan textiles depicted in frescoes are characterized by repeating geometric patterns, likely woven into the fabric itself, and that was something I wanted to capture in my own piece. My linen is woven with both cream and natural colored threads. The heavy weight is important to give structure to the garment--otherwise it would be kind of limp. My linen was from Burnley & Trowbridge (shameless plug), as was the plain cotton twill tape I used to bind the top and bottom edges of the kilt, and the dark red wool twill tape I used along the vertical edges.

I bought my cotton fringe from a rug supply store. I had to search a while to find a fringe that would work for me, and I ultimately chose fringes with a woven header rather than the more common knotted one, so that it would lay flat against the kilt. I hid the woven header under a layer of cotton fringed trim from Michaels (yes, Michaels) with this really great diamond and dots pattern woven in black.

The blue layers are from a bolt of vintage wool Kimono fabric. Blue appears frequently in frescoes, likely achieved with indigo or woad dye, or even murex/mollusk dye. The fabric is printed with an imitation ikat pattern of diamonds and squares that made me think "the vibes seem right!" because quite frankly, you aren't going to get "historically accurate" Minoan textiles (which there probably isn't enough archaeological evidence to definitively describe) without, like, hand-weaving it yourself or paying someone hundreds of dollars to do it for you (and that price is if the weaver really likes you). Neither of which appealed to my desire to just make a fun, low stress project. Good enough is good enough.

The narrow trim on the bottom of the blue flounces is vintage cotton/poly woven trim. This trim, while narrow, was quite thick and stiff, which was great because it added more weight and structure to the end of my flounces since the wool fabric itself was quite thin.

The top layer is a custom tablet-woven wool trim that I commissioned from MAHTAVAhandicraft on Etsy. I imagined this as the "centerpiece" of my kilt, and I'd arrange everything to complement it.

It's a kivrim pattern, which has itself only been traced to 19th-century Anatolia, but I didn't care. The way it looks like waves reminded me of how central the sea was to life in the Ancient Aegean and Mediterranean and it captured the idea and aesthetic I was pursuing. I mean, doesn't it remind you of these dolphins?

(I like the dolphins)

The whole thing was machine sewn with the exception of hemming and adding trim to the blue flounces. If you were to look at it from the back, you'd see lots of zigzag stitches, because i wanted to be fast! and have fun! not chase some unreachable ideal of "accurate."

As for wearing it, I chose to wear it with the top part folded/rolled down over a belt, so I have a thick tube of fabric around my waist. Many images, like the frescoes above of women with fringed kilts, appear to just show the kilt being tied closed. Other images are so fragmented or stylized that it's unclear what kind of skirt closure was used. Sculptures and figurines definitely show some kind of SOMETHING around the waist, whether this is folded fabric or a kind of belt is unclear. Different art could show different things!

I think I see evidence of a continuous line from the skirt to the waist-roll on the figure on the left, found in Troas, which I think indicates some kind of skirt-folding situation. The woman on the right, found in Crete, looks more like she's wearing some kind of long coiled belt, or perhaps snakes. Who knows? I don't! For my own part, I found the combination of rolled waist + tie belt the most secure for doing things like kneeling, stomping around, and wading into rivers to rescue bees. I also liked that it gave me the bulk around the hips that gives Minoan figurines such a powerful silhouette, and proportionally gives more of an hourglass shape. If you wanted to do something more firmly grounded in the sources, stick just with the waist tie or belt, wrapped around a couple times and tied in back. If you want to be like me, just say "well we don't KNOW it didn't happen" and just do whatever you want. Have fun! Whatever happens, it should be fairly easy to move around in the kilt--this is not a restrictive garment, just a heavy one.

[jetskisonyourmoat]

Do you guys ever think about ‘Del Schwartz’

[Photo] [Interview]

I was watching this interview last night, purely for nostalgia and this part reminded me again of a few things. Firstly, Alex loves to tell half truths, he did in fact see the name ‘Schwartz’ on the back of an Alfa Romeo but didn’t elaborate on the fact that it was from Louise’s mv, which feels significant but maybe it was incidental. Secondly, the lack of B-sides this era and the mystery song ‘Del Schwartz’ will always haunt me. I desperately want to know what kind of vibe they were going for based on this bumper sticker on an old car. The whole thing feels like a missed opportunity to round off the era as a whole. ‘Anways’ felt like a perfect epilogue for TBHC and we didn’t get that this time around. But I’m hoping they prove me wrong and release something this year, because I really do miss the band 😞

[abbott976]

Take Her Name Out Of Your Mouth

Zeke sighed as he towelled off and began to dress. Wrestling practice had been brutal today. Coach was prepping them for their upcoming tournament on Kingshead Island and had been pushing them hard all week. But today was finally Friday which meant a much needed break and some time with his girl.

As Zeke began putting his dirty practice clothes into his duffel bag, his phone buzzed on his locker shelf with a text from Tina.

"Hey baby, are you still coming by the restaurant tonight after practice? I figured we could hang out after closing since it's Friday :)"

Zeke smiled as he punched out a quick reply, letting her know practice had just ended and he'd be heading over soon.

Just as he hit send, he felt one of his teammates approach him. Unfortunately it was Bradley, who was the biggest asshole Zeke had ever met. He was a bully at best and a borderline predator in how he treated the girls at school.

Zeke couldn't stand how misogynistic he was, with Bradley always talking about his latest conquest in the locker room. Zeke had told him on more than one occasion he needed to mind his manners and respect the girls he was with, but Bradley always shook him off.

Today, Bradley had decided to push Zeke's buttons once again.

"Ooh got your little girlfriend waiting for ya Zeke? Bet she'd love to see you after practice, huh?"

Zeke tried to ignore him. He knew he could easily take Bradley in a fight and didn't need to stir up trouble. But if he couldn't keep Tina's name out of his mouth, Zeke would make sure he'd regret it.

"You know Zeke, I kind of get what you see in her. I mean the quiet shy type are always the kinkiest in my experience. I bet she's a real freak in the sheets for you."

Without a seconds hesitation, Zeke turned and decked Bradley in the jaw. All Zeke saw was red as he threw Bradley against the lockers.

"You'd be wise to take my girls name outta yer fuckin mouth Bradley."

"Oh yeah? Or what?"

And with that, Zeke let loose.

-----------

"Hey Zeke, how was pract-- OH my God what happened to your face??" Linda all but screamed at him when he entered the restaurant.

"Hey Mrs. B. Don't worry I'm alright. Just busted my lip at practice. You know how Coach has been, what with the tournament coming up... He's been having us practice some new moves and one of the guys had me in a hold wrong, and I busted my lip on the way to the mat."

Linda studied him for a moment, and Zeke thought for sure she knew he was lying through his teeth. Zeke hated lying period, especially to the Belchers, but he hatrd the idea of Tina knowing what that jerk had said about her.

Just when he thought Linda was about to call him on his lie, she gave him a small half smile.

"Okay honey... how about you go into the kitchen with Bobby. Have him get you some ice for that lip, okay? I'll let Tina know you're here. She's upstairs helping Louise get ready for a date."

"Thanks Mrs. B"

Zeke knew that while Linda may have decided to believe his flimsy excuse, Bob would see right through him in a second. The moment Zeke entered the kitchen, Bob looked him up and down from the grill.

"So. I take it you got into a fight at practice huh?"

"....yeah."

"I got some ice on the counter for you. I set it out by the first aid kit. Looks like your knuckles could use some bandaging up."

"Thanks, Mr. B."

Zeke quietly washed his hands and began the process of bandaging his bloodied and bruised knuckles. Thankfully they weren't in too bad of shape. When he finished he put the first aid kit away and began to ice his lip, leaning against the prep station and waiting for the questions he knew Bob had for him.

"Do I even want to know what the fight was about, Zeke?"

"Probably not, considering it was about your daughter."

"You got into a fight over Tina at practice?? With who?"

Zeke sighed. "Remember that asshole I was tellin ya about last week? That Bradley kid who can't keep his damn mouth shut or respect any of the girls he runs around on?"

Bob stilled at this. "Yeah."

"Well let's just say he needed a lesson in keeping Tina's name out of his mouth. AndI made sure he learned it quick."

With that, Zeke turned, dropping his ice pack on the counter, and began to prep some tomatoes for tomorrow's special. Bob stood silent beside him for a long time as he grilled and plated burgers through the late dinner rush.

When Tina came downstairs a while later looking for Zeke, he turned to Bob, and quietly asked

"Mr. B...Think we can keep what I told you between us? I don't like lying to Tina but I don't want her to know what that ass said about her. I don't want to upset her over what he said about her."

Bob simply patted him on the shoulder, giving his silent nod of agreement. As Zeke began to walk out of the kitchen to greet his girlfriend, Bob called after him.

"Hey Zeke?"

"Yeah Mr. B?"

"Thanks for looking out for her."

[mediapen]

T H E E X T E N D E D M E T A P H O R .

agustín gómez-acros, the carnivorous lamb (trans. william rodarmor) // [x] // sam sax, ‘RIBS’ // [x] // [x] // louise glück, ‘persephone the wanderer’ // louise erdrich, 'fooling god' // [x] // b: william bearhart, ‘at the dinner table with god and my father’ // richard siken, ‘dr. jones, magical thinking, and the divine’ // margaret atwood, ‘half-hanged mary’ // jenny xie, ‘postmemory’ // akwaeke emezi, freshwater // connie voisine, '“the altar” by george herbert’ // traci brimhall, rookery // richard siken, 'hansel,' in kate bernheimer (ed.) brothers and beasts // ted hughes, 'being christlike.'

[mara-tevith-solo]

It Takes Two

This is my second failed attempt to do a short, simple one-shot for this guy, Jeez Louise. Enjoy! Part 1, Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Pairing: Eventual Miguel O’Hara x Enhanced ex-Avenger Reader

Warnings: They’re idiots, full dance around your feelings and gaslight yourself about them idiots, injury, blood, violence, mention of miscarriage, Concussion Confessions, Mayday being a cutie pie, Peter B being the Dad, use of Spanish as a none-native speaker but i tried finding actual Mexican Spanish terms 

Rated: PG-13 but still, please no minors

Words: 1.6k+

Miguel O'Hara was an enigma. At least to you he was. To everyone else he was stern, stoic, even unpleasant and harsh. To you he was... different. It's hard to ever imagine the man as soft, but with you he very much was. He was always making sure that you were alright, that your workload wasn't more than you could comfortably handle, that your mental and physical health stayed a priority to you. He even went out of his way to make sure you never skipped a meal, especially when you were so thrown into a project that you forgot what day it was.

You weren't even supposed to be there, in the Spider Society. You weren't a Spider-Person. You were an enhanced ex-Avenger from Earth-199999 that he'd... taken pity on? You weren't even sure why he'd initially invited you to join the Society. No one was, not even Lyla. You just knew that he had a habit of seeking out your proximity, even if neither of you said a word.

"Y/n! There you are! Get suited up! Boss man needs you on deck!" Peter B materialized in front of you as you worked on a random engine you'd found lying around, earning a small yip and a quick juggling of the wrench you'd been using. Mayday found it entertaining at least, giggling her cute little cheeks off and clapping her little hands.

"B, you're lucky I like your kid, 'cause sometimes I'd like to sucker punch you whenever you scare me." You were joking, of course, and he knew it too, chuckling as he stroked May's fiery mane.

"Oh no. Can't have me face the consequences of my own actions. That would end the world!" His sarcasm kept her little giggles going as he lifted her high in the air. You couldn't name the intense emotion blooming in your chest in that moment, it was consuming and aching, like a sailor's widow looking for him to return every day up on a windy cliff. It felt like something was getting sucked through your chest as your gaze on the little toddler turned melancholy. Peter B was many things, and surprisingly observant was definitely one of them, though he had more than enough practice when Mary Jane was pregnant. He knew longing when he saw it, and he'd seen it on you more than once when interacting with Mayday, though he could swear they were getting less frequent and less intense the more time you spent with his little bundle of joy. He knew your life hadn't been all sunshine and roses, he knew that you'd once been expectant of your own little bundle, but Thanos had brutally taken that from you to hurt your then husband. And when you thought no one was looking, he saw the glances you centered on Miguel. "They're gonna be ready to go here soon, so you should get a scuttle on." He hinted with a warm half-smile.

You snapped out of your daze with a solid nod, offering the Spider and Spiderling a warm smile before quickly making your way to Miguel's office, where you knew that the tall futuristic man liked to start from. It didn't take you long to get there, your mask in hand as his gaze found you over the heads of the others, warming to a garnet shade from its usual intense ruby "Now that we're all here, we need to get a move on. Remember, we're dealing with two different Doc Ocks this time." Everyone nodded to him in understanding, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer before a portal appeared with a deep thrum.

The city on the other side was in chaos, several flipped and destroyed cars on fire, people running and screaming in all directions, understandably so. Jess already had wheels on the ground, waiting for you as you hopped on the back and crouched, ready for her to slingshot you at the closest adversary. Your Volto mask suddenly felt claustrophobic, cutting off part of your peripheral vision, but right then wasn't the time to fix it. The click of the gearbox was your only warning that you were about to be catapulted, Jess bringing the bike down to neutral as she kicked out the backend right as you jumped, sending you sailing through the air and into an Ock who looked like he'd come straight from a silent hill horror film. He cried out in frustration as you latched onto him, immediately dodging his bladed mechanical arms, coated in fresh blood as you began scrambling to disable the arms. "Get off of me you halfwit!" He snarled at you with a voice like gravel and grit, the flash of his teeth reminding you of a shark's.

"Not until you stop rampaging in the wrong Universe, genius!" You snapped back, ducking wildly to avoid getting scalped. Other Spiders joined you, red and white webs trying to take control of his arms so that you could work in relative peace. You had the tip of your knife in the neural link, prying it out of his flesh as he began crying in pain and fear, his arms whirring and snapping frantically, trying to get to you. A strangled cry was your only warning before something solid hit you like a freight train, sending you flying away from the fight, a weird pressure just under your right collarbone, one that simultaneously stung and felt cold. You didn't have time to contemplate why as your back made hard contact with a concrete pillar, knocking the breath from your lungs without mercy as you fell the short distance to the ground.

Your ears were ringing so loudly you almost forgot what sounds were, your eyelids too heavy to work properly as you struggled for breath. You were in pain, bone deep, radiating pain that made you want to curl into a ball and sleep for a year as you laid there on your side in the dirt. You tried getting up on your hands and knees in a bid for air and to relieve some of the pain, your ears still ringing and your eyes barely opening, but blinding, shooting pain on the right side of your chest stopped you in your tracks. You could hear someone shouting, you couldn't hear what they were saying as your fight for air became more desperate, something rattling in your chest with every attempt. Your eyes finally opened fully as hands made contact, large warm hands that helped to center you against the pain. Miguel was crouched over you, his mask still in place but you could see the panic in the eyes of it "...'me on! You can do it, Y/n! Just one breath." You were shocked at how panicked he sounded as the ringing dissipated, but your body obeyed, sucking in a ragged, greedy lung full of air before repeating the process over and over. "Good, good. Buena chica."

You watched as he shrunk in on himself, taking big breathes of his own, his relief clear "Miguel..." You breathed, licking your lips under your mask "did we..."

"We got 'em." He nodded, one of his hands petting your hair "Let's get you back home." He was gentle as he picked you up, cradling you as close to his chest as he could, not letting anyone take you when they offered. He was adamant that none of them could see how afraid to lose you he'd suddenly been, how afraid that he had lost you he'd been. He couldn't stop that small vibrating purr he made as your head tucked itself in the crook of his neck, his hands clutching you closer in silent response. He felt guilty, like absolute shit, that you'd gotten hurt because his web had snapped, that little voice that liked to reside in the back of his mind telling him that you needed to go back to your Universe and stay there, that you'd be safer there. But the more rational part of him reasoned that at that moment, he needed to focus on getting you to medical, getting you better. He'd deal with the after later. "Stay awake, Cielo. Need you to stay awake right now." He could feel your breathes beginning to deepen, feel you relaxing into him more than you should have as he stepped through the portal.

"'M so tired, Mig." You mumbled your argument, nuzzling your masked face deeper into his neck "'N you're so comfy."

Any other situation he would have found somewhere comfortable for him and taken a nap with you, held you the entire time. But you were hurt, concussion was too heavy a possibility for him to just let you rest "No, come on, Y/n. You need to stay awake a bit longer. We're almost there." He let his concern and fear temper his tone, trying to get your hurt brain to understand the severity of the situation.

"You worry too much, Mig." You hummed softly, your filter long gone and your ability to worry about it gone with it "You should relax, you're so pretty when you smile." He couldn't feel your dopey little smile, but he could certainly hear it, feel how it made his heartrate spike wildly. His mind felt frozen, unable to fully process that you at the very least liked his smile.

"You're delirious." He huffed as he quickened his pace, trying to pass off your words as just concussed nonsense.

"Maybe," You conceded "but it doesn't change the fact that I've had the biggest crush on you this past year." He wondered, in his stuttering thoughts, if you realized that you were admitting all of that to him, if you were aware of what that mouth of yours was doing.

He was relieved as he passed the threshold of the Medical Wing, several Spider-Doctors rushing to take you from him "We'll talk about this when you're better, Cielo. Until then, survive." Without another word he was passing you to the nearest medical professional and watching as they whisked you away as quickly as possible, talking in medical jargon that he couldn't fully understand.

[ordinaryschmuck]

Bob's Burgers Halloween specials ranked

(Because screw it, why not?)

11. Tina and the Real Ghost--This one's more awkward than funny. I honestly feel bad for Tina for falling in love with an empty box...and grow to hate Tammy for being so petty to steal the box away from her. Even the B-Plot of ghost hunters in the restaurant isn't all that funny. Honestly, the funniest bit is when Bob's unexpectedly swarmed with bugs after a brief moment of cockiness. Other than that, pretty weak episode.

10. The Wolf of Wharf Street--PROBABLY the most irresponsible Linda's been with the kids and Bob believing Teddy's a werewolf was a bit of a stretch. Still, some spooky atmosphere carries this one a bit, so I can't hate it THAT much.

9. Apple Gore-chard! (But Not Gory)--There need to be more episodes with Louise and Jessica. Their friendship is easy and cute in a lot of moments. Anyways, as for the episode, it's pretty standard. Some REAL Halloween stuff doesn't happen until half way through and the jokes aren't all that funny. There's barely any attention on the lesson, making it feel more like a waste of time if anything else. It's just Louise and Jessica's friendship that carries things if anything else (Seriously, MORE of that)

8. Pig Trouble in Little Tina--A great episode about peer pressure and with a fun subplot about Bob's gross ear wax. It's just that none of it screams HALLOWEEN to me. There's some spooky imagery, but a lot of this episode feels like something that could happen in ANY episode, especially Bob's subplot. Great episode, but not so great of a Halloween special.

7. Heartbreak Hotel-oween--This one's cute. That's all I can say.

6. Teen-a Witch--Tina trying to be a witch is more cute than it should be, even if the jokes aren't strong with this one. Thankfully the subplot of Bob obsessing over who's stealing his jack-o-lanterns is funny enough to carry it.

5. The Pumpkinening--Weird title, but it's an episode with Gayle. They're naturally weird, and this one's no exception as Linda and Gayle hunting down who knows that they smashed pumpkins from a contest. Add that with a warm ending and a great subplot of Bob dealing with the stress of being a house with GOOD candy, and you got something fun.

4. Nightmare on Ocean Avenue Street--The kids hunting down a candy kidnapper is fun and Bob and Teddy trying to show up an impressive handyman has some good laughs to it. Solid special.

3. Full Bars--It's always fun seeing the Belcher kids use their brand of chaos to do something good. The only thing that drags it down is the guinea pig murder mystery. Some good jokes are there, but I can't help but cringe as Teddy ruins his own party and the payoff isn't all that funny. That credit scene where Bob danced in the fat suit for Linda was cute as shit, though.

2. Fort Night--The introduction to Millie, and a great one at that as she tortures the kids who are in a situation that's...way more dangerous than you think in hindsight. They really were that close to death, huh? Still, a pretty empathetic episode as we all know there's no worse fate for a kid than missing Halloween and you REALLY want them to get out. And I'm sure some parents can relate to Bob and Linda's plight to make a costume for their kids and the payoff for this one is pretty good.

1. The Hauntening--A genuinely creepy and intense special for this show, where the jokes don't take away from the scares but add to them. This really feels like how these characters would react to a horrifying situation, making you fear for their lives even more. And even the big twist in the end doesn't ruin the episode, but adds to it, showing how much this family cares for each other and how much they'll do to make one of them happy. They might have gone a LITTLE far, but it's in that gray area where you can accept it. Being sweet and spooky is no other combination you can get from any other show except for this one, and I love it.

And that's all. Well, for now. Season 14 hasn't had its Halloween special yet. It's probably pulling a Simpsons and waiting until November for some reason. And I'm not waiting until then. This is the Halloween Special on MY blog, so there. Happy Halloween.

[ltwharfy]

"Bob's Burgers" Season 10 Episode Ranking Rewatch (Long Post)

So, I've been rewatching "Bob's Burgers" from the beginning and ranking the episodes using the spreadsheet that @babsvibes created! If you want to know why I'm doing this or how I view the 1-5 rating scale, you can check out my Season 1 post! If you want to check out any of the other seasons, I've been using the "bob's burgers episode ranking rewatch" tag for all of them.

Now, on to Season 10:

Average (Mean) Score: 4.27

Mode (Most Common) Ranking: 4

Ranking Breakdown: 7 5s 14 4s 1 3

Season as whole thoughts:

This is the lowest average score for a season since Season 2, and that seems about right to me. Season 2 and Season 10 are kind of bookends for my personal Golden Age of "Bob's Burgers".

In my experience, all long running sitcoms (and I'd define long running as maybe more than 5 seasons), eventually undergo a transition where I stop seeing them as "one of the funniest things on TV!" and, if I continue watching them it's more because I like hanging out in their world with their characters, even if they don't make me laugh quite as hard as they used to on a regular basis. And a lot of shows don't make that transition successfully- I just stop watching them because they don't make me laugh as much and I realize I don't really care about the characters. Or I stick around but then retroactively realize I only like about half the episodes of the show.

I still enjoyed Season 10 and beyond of "Bob's Burgers", but (as the numbers for this silly project will likely show), I found Season 10 and onward to have a lot more episodes where my reaction was "that's good" or "that's nice" or "that was kinda boring but it was still nice to be with the Belchers" rather than "that episode was amazing!"

One caveat I will add to that is: I have noticed that some of the later season episodes tend to grow on me upon rewatching them- which honestly is great and one of the things that makes this project fun!

Some thoughts on specific episodes (and feel free to ask if you want my thoughts on an episode I didn't comment on):

"Pig Trouble in Little Tina": This was definitely an episode that grew on me. When I first watched it, I mainly found it weird and kinda gross (the pig's guts spilling out in Tina's dream.) And it is both those things! But it is also really funny and kind of touching. So, a great "Bob's Burgers" Halloween episode. I love the "skeletons doing helpful things around the farm" hayride, and the bit where Louise can't draw blood from Tina is a fun reminder that for all Louise's bluster she's just a kid. And the Fiona Apple end credits song lives in my head rent free now. "But you kissed a fetal pig and now you two are boyfriend-girlfriend" is a lyric for the ages.

"Legends of the Mall": I talk a lot about how Rudy's stories remind me of myself as a kid, but Bob and Bosco's story here reminds me of myself now. "Middle-aged man is confused and frustrated by buying pants" is the story of my life now. Well, not THE story, but a plotline. I definitely do think the phrase, "they're call pants, not can'ts" pretty often.

"The Hawkening: Look Who's Hawking Now!": Koji is a fun character and I am glad they found a story to bring him back in. And I think the story structure is really interesting in this episode: there is an A and B plot, but they both center around Louise, with the resolution of the one informing the resolution of the other. Also, the Zeke and Rudy interaction at the beginning of this episode is one of my favorite things ever. Also also, this episode led to the creation of what may be the fic I've reread the most: "I know I believe it, and so do my bones" by CourtneyCourtney (@daddygrandpaandthebeaver) which is one of those episode tag fics that is so good it has merged with the episode itself in my mind. (What? You don't remember the scene in this episode with Louise and Rudy at the frozen yogurt shop?!)

"Now We're Not Cooking With Gas": This has enough good things (especially the Riverbrook Lake Farms Heritage Turkey song) that I gave it a 4, but it's probably one of my last favorite Thanksgiving episodes. I know Bob's always kind of a jerk in Thanksgiving episodes, but the bit where the kids are so proud to have brought him that giant log for his fire and he rejects it really bothers me. It's possible I'm repressing a similar memory from my childhood or something.

"A Fish Called Tina": Yes, this episode introduces one of my favorite minor characters, Kaylee Morganstern. Yes, we get another Louise and Tammy story and I always love that dynamic. But the real highlight of this episode is Madison, Tina's old big fish, who has an incredibly high ratio of really funny lines to total number of lines. "Welcome to Caboose Kabob, what can I put in your caboose?" and "Order 71, Baba Ghanoush Caboose and a cup of juice!" always crack me up. Sorry, but caboose is just an inherently funny word.

"Three Girls and a Little Wharfy": The episode that helped inspire my confusing username here and on AO3! Just an all around fun episode- Fifth Grade Megan was a fun new character, as is April Busby (her line about studying for the bar exam "soap not the other one" and including the Madonna/Sean Penn divorce in her Wharfy scrapbook both crack me up). And Louise just has a lot of fun little moments in this one- I particularly love her mimicking Linda when borrowing the laptop from her parents, also her response to Megan's comment about not talking to the cat on her block ("I mean, I'll try, but if he talks to me I'm not going to be rude...")

"Wag the Song": The most I've ever related to Zeke and J-Ju. If me and my grade school best friends would've had the chance to write the school song, it would've absolutely turned out along the lines of their song. (And all the kids and the songs are a hoot!)

"Tappy Tappy Tappy Tap Tap Tap": A pretty meh episode. Personally, I didn't really need to revisit Josh. On the plus side, it gave us the phrase "Rudy's ballet fight", which will live in my mind forever.

"Poops!...I Didn't Do It Again": This is another episode that grew on me. Similar to "Pig Trouble", I initially found it weird/gross but now find it funny and touching. And the theme about parents trying not to pass their fears/insecurities along to their kids is an important one that I don't often see expressed in pop culture. On a lighter/weirder note, "I'm thinking animatronic doves with human private parts" is probably a top 10 Gene line for me. (However, I am annoyed that this episode basically forgets about Jezebel from "Synchronized Swimming".)

"Prank You for Being A Friend": This is the story that makes Kaylee one of the most interesting recurring characters to me. While I never tried to get kicked out of school because I couldn't find my people, I can certainly understand the motivation (I would've been more likely to do that in high school than 4th grade.) Also, this newspaper joke at the end of this episode basically inspired Rudlee, the Rudy/Kaylee ship aka my second favorite ship for of both those characters! (Please don't judge me for having multiple Kaylee Morganstern ships...)

Random thoughts (stuff that doesn't affect the ratings):

-What's the best use of a recurring character in "Bob's Burgers"? What's the best delivery of a single word in "Bob's Burgers"? The answer to both questions can be found in "Local She-ro" when Gus appears only to say the line "Chumbawamba!" in his Gus voice.

On that note, I get knocked down, but I get up again. You are never gonna keep me down.

Which is a weirdly defiant way to say that I'll see you (theoretical readers of these crazy long posts) in Season 11!

[pmdaumountainluxio]

Mountain Luxio 3-24

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[Main Cover] [Chapter Cover] [Previous] [Next]

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You're expecting a zonked Louise. But it was ME! NONSLEEPER IQ SKILL!!

In case you might ask: What is Nonsleeper Skill, it's an IQ skill from the Explorers games where a Pokémon would be permanently immune to sleep-inducing moves, items and traps. Nonsleeper is part of IQ Group A, B and C, the lattermost which Luxio (and its familia) belongs to. This Skill can be attained at 160 points or 2 Stars IQ (she basically has the first half of the entire Group C skill pre-climb up to Concentrator).

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You can follow the comic series in the ff:

[Comicfury] [Ko-fi] [Patreon] [Itaku]

You can also leave a tip / support in Ko-fi and Patreon.

Mountain Luxio is a Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Explorers AU comic series inspired by the game Celeste. Pokémon and Celeste: (c) respective owners.

Comic drawn by me. Do not repost elsewhere, alter or copy.

[odettecarotte]

Louise Glück, NYT

Louise Glück, photo by Charles S. Hertz

b. 1943

The Nobel-winning poet was pitiless to herself, yet fiercely generous toward her students.

By Amy X. Wang The New York Times

She stood barely five feet tall — slight, unassuming, you had to stoop low to kiss her cheek — but whenever Louise Glück stepped into a classroom, she shot a current through it. Students stiffened their spines, though what they feared was not wrath but her searing rigor: Even in her late 70s, after she won the Pulitzer and the National Humanities Medal and the Nobel, she always spoke to young writers with complete seriousness, as if they were her equals. “My first poem, she ripped apart,��� says Sun Paik, who took Glück’s poetry class as a Stanford undergraduate. “She’s the first person whom I ever received such a brutal critique from.” Mark Doty, a National Book Award-winning poet who studied under Glück in the 1970s at Goddard College, felt that she “represented total authenticity and complete honesty.” This, he recalls, “pretty much scared me half to death.”

Spare, merciless, laser-precise: Glück’s signature style as a writer. It was there from an early age. Born in 1943 to a New York family of tactile pragmatists (her father helped invent the X-Acto knife), Glück, a preternaturally self-competitive child, was constantly trying to whittle away at her own perceived shortcomings. When she was a teenager, she developed anorexia — that pulverizing, paradoxical battle with both helplessness and self-control — and dropped to 75 pounds at 16. The disorder prevented her from completing a college degree. Many of the poems Glück wrote in her early 20s flog her own obsessions with, and failures in, control and exactitude. Her narrators are habitués of a kind of limitless wanting; her language, a study in ruthless austerity. (A piano-wire-taut line tucked in her 1968 debut, “Firstborn”: “Today my meatman turns his trained knife/On veal, your favorite. I pay with my life.”) In her late 20s, Glück grew frustrated with writing and was prepared to renounce it entirely.

So she took, in 1971, a teaching job at Goddard College. To her astonishment, being a teacher unwrapped the world — it bloomed anew with possibility. “The minute I started teaching — the minute I had obligations in the world — I started to write again,” Glück would confess in a 2014 interview. Working with young minds quickly became a sort of nourishment. “She was profoundly interested in people,” says Anita Sokolsky, a friend and colleague from Williams College, where Glück began teaching in 1984. “She had a vivid and unstinting interest in others’ lives that teaching helped focus for her. Teaching was very generative to her writing, but it was also a kind of counter to the intensity and isolation of her writing.”

Glück’s own poems became funnier and more colloquial, marrying the control she earlier perfected with a new, unexpected levity (in her 1996 poem “Parable of the Hostages”: “What if war/is just a male version of dressing up”), and it is her later books, like the lauded “The Wild Iris” from 1992, that made her a landmark literary figure. Teaching also coaxed out a new facet in Glück herself: that of a devoutly unselfish mentor, a tutor of unbridled kindness.

A less fastidious writer and thinker may have made their teaching duties rote — proffering uniformly encouraging feedback or reheating a syllabus year after year. Glück, though, threw herself into guiding pupils with the same care and intimacy she gave to her own verses. “There was just this voraciousness, this generosity,” says Sally Ball, who met Glück while studying with her at Williams and remained close with her for the three decades until her death. “Every time I moved, she put me in touch with people in that new place. She enjoyed bringing people to know each other and sharing the things she loved.” And as a teacher, Ball says, “Louise was really clear that you have to make yourself change. You can’t just keep doing the same things over and over again.” In that spirit of boundless self-advancement, Glück also taught herself to love cooking and eating. She once hand-annotated a Marcella Hazan recipe and mailed it to Ball, with sprawling commentary on how best to prepare rosemary. “She’s very beautiful and elegant, right,” Ball says, but “we’d go to Chez Panisse and sit down and she eats with gusto. It’s messy, she’s mopping her hands around on the plate.”

Paik recalls spending hours each week decoding Glück’s dense, cursive comments on her work. “I was 19 or 20,” she says, “writing these scrappy, honestly pretty bad poems, and to have them be received with such care and detail — it pushed me to become a better writer because it set a standard of respect.”

“She was 78, and whenever she talked about poetry, it felt like the first time she’d encountered poetry,” says Shangyang Fang, who met Glück when he was at Stanford on a writing fellowship. Glück offered to edit his first poetry collection, and the pair became close friends. “She would talk about a single word in my poem for 10 minutes with me,” Fang says. Evenings would go late. They cooked for each other sometimes, spending hours talking vegetables and spices, poetry and idle gossip. “By the end, I couldn’t thank her enough, and she said: ‘Stop thanking me! I am a predator, feeding on your brain!’”

[houseofbrat]

Did you see that two deranged cambridge stans on your post? They're right on schedule like markle stans lol

Oh, I see all the comments on my posts, even though I usually don't comment.

People are losing their minds over this without thinking any of this through. Mostly because they don't understand the situation or Charles. Instead they're resorting to apocalyptic thinking that would never happen, e.g. Sussex balcony appearances, Archie & Lilibet attending the coronation, etc.

Basically everyone freaking out about this demonstrates that they don't know anything about Charles or his plans to slim the monarchy. Instead, someone who does understand the immediate situation would be River on YouTube. I don't watch River's videos, but someone posted a summary of it on reddit:

In this video River says the following:

Duke and Duchess of South Park were very angry that Archie was not styled a prince when he was born. They refused to acknowledge that letters patent only styles grandchildren of the monarch gets those titles, and at the time the queen was still alive.

Duke and Duchess of South Park refused to use the title Earl of Dumbarton, which is Harry´s secondary title.

Then the Oprah interview happened, where they claimed Archie was not given a title because of racism.

When the queen died, Harry wanted KC to change the letters patent to validate their racism story.

KC did not do so, but did not announce the children´s titles.

And here we are - Duke and Duchess of South Park had to make their royal title announcement via People magazine, and not via a court circular, which is the normal way.

Duke and Duchess were panicking and paranoid, expecting the titles to be taken away.

Harry's wife is panicking. She is not even being photographed with him. He was at a BetterUp event this week. She's been avoiding getting photographed for months, and now she suddenly gets papped and has her lapdog Scobie release photos of her at a charity. Someone is DESPERATE, and it isn't The King.

Everyone freaking out about the titles--and I mean EVERYONE who is acting as if this is the end of the world--is proving that they a) don't understand Charles and b) do not understand the British monarchy.

Twenty years ago, Charles would have been perfectly fine with Beatrice & Eugenie to have been downgraded to daughters of a peer. The person who wasn't down with that change was Queen Elizabeth II.

Guess what? Charles is in charge now. Not QEII.

I'm sure Charles thought the will Louise choose to use her princess title when she turns 18 drama was real cute. Likewise, I doubt he's going to endure that pr drama again in another two and a half years when James turns 18.

I'm sure when Charles issues his letters patent some of the same people whining about the situation now will be whining about how mean Charles is about taking James & Louise's title & styles away. And likely Beatrice & Eugenie's titles & styles as well.

Neither of those four will ever be working royals. Ever.

Does it make sense for Beatrice or Eugenie to be princesses twenty five years from now? When they were never working royals? When they are the first cousin once removed of King George VII? No, it doesn't.

Does it make sense for James or Louise to have the ability to choose to use an HRH style and prince titles 30 years from now either? Or whenever it suits them in the future? No, it doesn't.

This is why the letters patent that Charles will issue will be a big deal. It was never going to solely revolve around the Sussex kids.

But the people whining over the last two days aren't smart enough to realize that.

[thanksforthedinosaur]

august 2024

lunar vacation - sick

sydney sprague - tell me

esme emerson - fade out

brye - chasm

illuminati hotties - power

chloe lilac - supermoon

orla gartland - the hit

rainbow frog biscuits - forget about you

beeson - swimmer

allie - radio shower

alix page - girlfriend

tokyo tea room - no rush

taska black - walk away

kississippi - smaller half

soccer mommy - m

michelle - mentos and coke

kenzie - face to face

clairo - add up my love

towa bird - ew

remi wolf - frog rock

tiffany day - kansas

tiffi - hell

abby holliday - steve martin

hannah cole - massachusetts

tilly louise - restart

hippo campus - paranoid

toe - close to you

options - had my share

i love your lifestyle - fickle minds

gulfer - cursed

jack m. senff - snake

haley heynderickx - seed of a seed

hannah cottrell - ~palmtrees~

teen daze - in the rain

silas - love line(s) ii

sumin - why, why, why

hailey knox - innocence

frey - just sad

jewel owusu - b-day

thủy - hair down

newjeans - right now

maya randle - set me free

slumberjunkie - teach me how to fly

kučka - cry cry cry

baobei - how you like me now

jessica hammond - lonely

sophi - bestie

take van - if we had another day

ceci - rocket

ariia rose - retrograde

edizzy - hiding

klurax - pretend

sycco - monkey madness

annie-dog - violence'66

vi0let - blue blood

tominthechamber - rollercoastering

kelz - guitar + peaches - mkstn remix

bcee - makes me feel alive

nude - maybe

lava la rue - second hand sadness

sudley - exhale

jon santana - where did you go

charlotte plank - nightshift

ema sakura - tell me

earth to emily - she kinda looks like me - elio x billy lemos remix

blondeting - control (watch me)

snoozegod - gave it all

wenszy - 5am

kruu - caramel

fuvk - handlebars

hkfiftyone - my purgatory

janghoon - moss

ilykimchi - lol

vally.exe - the rest

gaburyu - summonsense

porter robinson - is there really no happiness?

shiori novella - sirens

hakos baelz - 818

[annieeats]

Curried Lentil and Coconut Soup by Ottolenghi

Yotam Ottolenghi's curried lentil and coconut soup. Photograph: Louise Hagger/The Guardian. Food styling: Emily Kydd. Prop Styling: Jennifer Kay.

Click here for the recipe on The Guardian website

One of my favorite soups ever. What makes it a winner for me is its simplicity - no need for an overnight lentil soak, and the ingredients are mostly staples found in the pantry. I always ensure my pantry is stocked with these items, just in case I need a reliable Plan B. When I plan my meals in advance, I like to opt for some fresh ripe tomatoes instead of the canned ones. But, moreover the taste of this soup is just amazing.  

Throwing in some leftover carrots or green onions doesn't compromise the taste at all. A dollop of sour cream adds a festive touch, perfect for weekends or when entertaining guests. Ottolenghi's recipe doesn't include broth or stock, so I skip the salt and instead use chicken or vegetable tablets (1 per half a liter) to give the soup more substance. Additionally, I personally find the soup tastes better without the ginger the recipe calls for – a choice you can make for yourself.

For those looking to elevate the dish, try using coarsely or partly ground curry (Madras is my favorite) powder, or make your own blend. Adding some coriander, cumin, and fenugreek seeds to your existing curry spice blend makes a difference already! This adds a delightful complexity to the soup, creating subtle flavor variations as you enjoy each spoonful.

Furthermore, finding the red variety lentils can be challenging but Sprouts offers them both prepackaged and in bulk. Nevertheless, any lentil is okay! Here's a parting thought: imagine reducing the water, skipping the blending altogether, and serving it with potatoes or rice and some lush green beans? I'll keep you posted once I give it a try!

[fancoloredglasses]

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (Making it fun to yell at the movie since 1975), Part 1

[All images are owned by 20th Century Fox Disney....wait, really?! Anyway, please don't sue, kill, eat, or...whatever they did to everyone at the end...me]

WARNING: This review is NSFW, as it deals with sexual themes. You’ve been warned.

Are you OK with this? Good, then let’s continue.

(Thanks to 20th Century Studios)

In 1973 a little-known actor named Richard O’Brien decided to write and compose a musical stage production as a way to explore his own questions about his sexuality. Two years later, it was adapted for a movie…and late-night movies (especially around Halloween) haven’t been the same since.

While the movie wasn’t well-received as far as ticket sales went, when theaters started doing midnight showings of the film it developed a cult following, as well as becoming a banner for the queer community, with patrons of both genders dressing as the cast, as well as in their best feminine intimate wear…

(Thanks to Liverpool Echo)

…and talking back to/over the movie (a la MST3K) and bring props to display/throw (much to the employees’ chagrin. After all, they have to clean it all up after the movie’s over). Most theater-goers have a “script” of how they choose to do so (of course, if everyone has a different script in their head it can get very chaotic) If you’re curious, there are several versions online. Here’s one such example.

This review is going to be done slightly different than most, even the one that was essentially a musical in that I will be going over the songs after the clips (as most of the plot is driven through them) and will be including audience partici…

SAY IT!

…pation lines (at least the ones I do) on occasion. These will be done in chat font, as above.

(Word of warning, despite whatever I may say at the movie, it’s not intended to be mean-spirited. I’m just going along with the show)

So, without further ado, let’s get on with the show! If you would like to watch the film, it's behind your favorite paywall, or if you want the full experience, find out which of your local theaters is showing it on Halloween!

(Thanks to Dr. Frank-N-Furter)

So just whose lips are those? Well, scuttlebutt says that Mick Jagger volunteered his, but was turned down. Instead, those belong to Patricia Quinn (who plays Magenta). However, the voice is not Quinn’s, but O’Brien’s. Now, if you actually paid attention to the opening credits instead of just responding to the song, you’ll know exactly who is playing what. However, I will clue you in when they make their first appearance anyway.

Now, back to the movie as we dissolve to a church…

These lips died for your sins!

…where a wedding has just transpired (This is where the audience should start throwing rice at the screen). The photographer gets a photo of the happy couple and the family.

Now I have their souls!

The groom has a quick chat with his best man, Brad Majors, ...

ASSHOLE!

...played by Barry Bostwick (who was the mayor in Spin City) as the bride throws the bouquet

Hey, who has herpes?

…where it’s caught by Brad’s girlfriend, Janet Weiss, ...

SLUT!

...played by Susan Sarandon (who was half of Thelma and Louise)

This inspires Brad to sing to her. Before we get to the song, I have to wonder…

…who the hell puts a billboard in the middle of a cemetery? OK, on to the song!

(Thanks to Goldie McDuck)

OK, that’s an efficient church!

Those who are observant will recognize the church workers as O’Brien, Quinn, and Nell Campbell (AKA “Little Nell”). We’ll be discussing them later. For now, we go to the expository section of the film, narrated by “the Criminologist” (played by Charles Gray, who played Blofeld in a number of James Bond films)

…and has no fucking neck!

The Criminologist explains that, after getting engaged, Brad...

ASSHOLE!

...and Janet...

SLUT!

...decided to visit their old friend and former professor Dr. Everett Scott. He then foreshadows that the night is going to be memorable, but not in the way they’d hoped.

Speaking of the lovebirds, they’ve gotten hopelessly lost. Even worse, Brad’s car gets a blowout! Brad remembers passing a castle.

Castles don’t have phones, asshole!

Brad and Janet trudge through the rain to the castle. As the weather worsens, music starts to swell…

(Thanks to Gothic Witch Chick)

(Quick note: Susan Sarandon had pneumonia during filming. Props to her for doing this number in the rain in her condition)

Does the castle have what they need or is this the end for the happy couple? Tune in for Part 2 and find out!

[sixcostumerefs]

Performance Stats: 2022 (mainland edition)

Alright, it’s (no longer) that time of year again! Summary of all 2022 calendar year performances stats!! - This was a CRAZY year full of cross-production covers + emergency cover chaos so very fun to write up. It also made it a bit of a challenge with organization. If an actor was primarily with one production but served as an emergency cover for another, I listed them with their primary or initial production. - Yearly disclaimer that some errors and/or disparities could exist. - And as always, if you repost/use these stats anywhere, please credit me @sixcostumerefs (or six.costume.refs on Insta) And as always....a shoutout to Dionne Ward-Anderson, who featured in the largest number of performances this year, at a whopping 353 shows! Runner up is Andrea Macasaet at 327 shows, with Brittney Mack a very close third with 322! Most performing Aragon was Phoenix Jackson Mendoza (270), Seymour was Claudia Kariuki (293), Howard was Samantha Pauly (314.5), and Parr was Meesha Turner (267.5, but Alana Robinson was at 267). 2021-22 West End Amy di Bartolomeo: 242 performances Amanda Lindgren 255 performances Tsemaye Bob-Egbe: 233 performances Meesha Turner: 267.5 performances Paisley Billings: 114.5 performances (55 A, 44.5 C, 14 P) 2022-23 West End Rhianne-Louise McCaulsky: 81 performances Baylie Carson: 78 performances Koko Basigara: 65 performances Monique Ashe-Palmer: 14 performances (7 A, 1 B, 6 C) Leah Vassell: 40 performances (20 S, 1 C, 19 P) 2021-22 UK Tour Lauren Drew: 71 performances Maddison Bulleyment: 62 performances Caitlin Tipping: 68 performances Shekinah McFarlane: 60 performances Vicki Manser: 63 performances Elena Gyasi: 66 performances (61 regular prior to cast change + 5 emergency cover post-CC) Cassy Lee: 22 performances (8 A, 14 C) Cherelle Jay: 7 performances (1 B, 1 S, 2 C, 3 P) 2022-23 UK Tour Chloe Hart: 269 performances Casey Al-Shaqsy: 252 performances total (249 on UKT + 3 as E/C for WE) Aiesha Pease: 7 performances Jessica Niles: 237-245 performances total (19-27 performances with Breakaway 2.0, 218 performances with UKT) Jaina Brock-Patel: 110 performances Rebecca Wickes: 72 performances Alana M Robinson: 267 performances Harriet Caplan-Dean: 72 performances (10 A, 9 B, 13 S, 7 C, 18 H, 15 P) Grace Melville: 153 performances total w/ 151 performances on UKT (55 A, 4 B, 91 C with 60 of those performances as T/R, 1 P) + 2 as E/C for WE (2 C) Leesa Tulley: 186 performances (1 A, 35 B, 11 S, 137 H with 57 of those performances as T/R, 2 P) 2021-22 Broadway (+ Aug replacements) Adrianna Hicks: 202 performances Bre Jackson: 123 performances (two of these were half shows) Andrea Macasaet: 327 performances Abby Mueller: 117 performances Keri Rene Fuller: 183 performances (59 as T/R, 1 as early debut, the rest as principal) Brittney Mack: 322 performances Samantha Pauly: 314.5 performances Anna Uzele: 97 performances Joy Woods: 146 performances Brennyn Lark: 85 performances Mallory Maedke: 67.5 performances (16.5 A, 47 S, 4 H) Nicole Kyoung-Mi Lambert: 95 performances (39 A, 26 B, 30 C; two A were half-shows) Courtney Mack: 99.5 performances (25 B, 57.5 H, 17 P) Keirsten Hodgens: 107 performances total. 104 on Bway + 3 as emergency cover for Aragon Tour (Bway was 33 S, 25 C, 46 P; Tour was 3 C). Ayla Ciccone-Burton: 20 performances total. 12 pre-CC + 8 post-CC (pre-CC was 2 B, 3 C, 7 P; post-CC was 2 B, 3 C, 3 P) Holli’ Conway: 18 performances total. 9 pre-CC + 9 post-CC (pre-CC 3 C, 6 H; post-CC 5 A, 4 H) Hana Stewart: 2 performances (1 A, 1 P) 2022-23 Broadway Hailee Kaleem Wright: 27 performances Leandra Ellis-Gaston: 30 performances Bella Coppola: 30 performances Nasia Thomas: 29 performances Zoe Jensen: 19 performances Taylor Iman Jones: 29 performances Kristina Leopold: 2 performances (all as S) Aubrey Matalon: 9 performances (all as H) Aragon Tour Khaila Wilcoxon: 258 performances Storm Lever: 267 performances Jasmine Forsberg: 267 performances Olivia Donalson: 263 performances Didi Romero: 261 performances Gabriela Francesca Carrillo: 257 performances Cassie Silva: 41 performances total. 4 with Broadway + 37 with Aragon Tour (Broadway 3 B, 1 H; Aragon Tour 10 B, 13 C, 14 H) Kelly Denice Taylor: 29 performances total. 3 with Boy + 26 with Aragon Tour (Bway 3 S; Aragon Tour was 12 A, 7 S, 7 C) Kelsey Kimmel: 43 performances (16 A, 12 S, 15 P) Erin Ramirez: 34 performances (9 B, 11 H, 14 P) Boleyn Tour Gerianne Perez: 95 performances Zan Berube: 96 performances Amina Faye: 89 performances Terica Marie: 93 performances Aline Mayagoitia: 91 performances Sydney Parra: 96 performances Cecilia Snow: 18 performances (4 A, 11 S, 3 C) Tay Pearlstein: 13 performances (5 B, 7 H, 1 P) Jana Larell Glover: 20 performances (5 A, 8 C, 7 P) Aryn Bohannon: 13 performances (3 B, 4 S, 6 H) Australia Tour Phoenix Jackson Mendoza: 270 performances Kala Gare: 283 performances Loren Hunter: 291 performances Kiana Daniele: 269 performances Chelsea Dawson: 267 performances Video Makan: 254.5 performances Karis Oka: 137 performances (13 A, 28 B, 1 S, 26 C, 38 H, 31 P) Shannen Alyce Quan: 86 performances (9 A, 14 B, 30 S, 2 C, 6 H, 25 P) Chiara Assetta: 93 performances (29.5 A, 3 B, 3 S, 32 C, 18 H, 6.5 P) Cristina D’Agostino: 7 performances (all as P) Madeline Fansler: performances (with Breakaway 3.0: . 16 with Aus Tour: 7 A, 4 S, 5 P) Actors who primarily continued with their initial productions: Claudia Kariuki: 293 performances - 231 pre-CC - 62 post-CC Dionne Ward-Anderson: 353 performances - 269 pre-CC - 84 post-CC Roxanne Couch: 178 performances - Totalling 1 A, 5 B, 61 S, 13 H, 98 P - 122 pre-CC (1 A, 5 B, 61 S, 13 H, 42 P; two of the P were half performances) - 56 post-CC as principal Parr Rachel Rawlinson: 166 performances - Totalling 44 A, 13 B, 51 S, 29 C, 16 H, 13 P - 142 pre-CC (40 A, 12 B, 37 S, 29 C, 13 H, 11 P; 1 C + 1 S were mid-show swing-ons) - 24 post-CC (4 A, 1 B, 14 S, 3 H, 2 P) Esme Rothero: 153 performances - Totalling 19 A, 32 B, 19 S, 16 C, 27 H, 40 P - 129 pre-CC (17 A, 31 B, 19 S, 16 C, 19 H, 27 P) - 24 post-CC (2 A, 1 B, 8 H, 13 P) Danielle Rose: 192 performances - 152 pre-CC (6 A, 51 B, 4 S, 3 C, 87 H, 1 P) - 40 post-CC (15 B, 21 H, 4 P) Jennifer Caldwell: 289 performances total - Totalling 296 as B, 11 H, 3 P - 21 pre-CC as alt (7 B, 11 H, 3 P) - 287 post-CC as principal Boleyn - 2 as E/C Boleyn for West End Natalie Pilkington: 142 performances total - Totalling 8 A, 3 B, 65 S, 12 C, 2 H, 52 P - 130 performances with 22-23 UKT (2 A, 3 B, 64 S, 12 C, 1 H, 48 P) - 3 performances w 21-22 UKT (1 A, 1 H, 1 P) - 9 performances as E/C for WE (5 A, 1 S, 3 P) Standby swings: Harriet Watson: 78 performances total - Totalling 2 A, 19 B, 21 S, 14 C, 6 H, 14 P - 42 performances as alt for the 21-22 UKT (10 B, 11 S, 4 C, 5 H, 12 P) - 3 performances as E/C on the UKT (3 C) - 17 performances as E/C for the WE (6 B, 6 S, 2 C, 1 P) - 6 performances as standby swing for 21-22 WE (2 B, 3 S, 1 H) - 10 performances as standby swing for 22-23 WE (2 A, 1 B, 1 S, 5 C, 1 P) Marilyn Caserta: 5-7 performances total - all as Aragon - 2-4 Bliss 3.0 (all as A) - 3 Bway (all E/C as A) Emergency Covers Courtney Bowman: 1 performance (WE)