#lost in my drafts but I love them sm

[seduceme-lovestruck-thearcana]

Found in my drafts and I feel you AFK/ALK MC. If I’m being angsty, don’t stop me.

[causenessus]

more than anything else. | akaashi k.

I LOST THE REQUEST BC I TRIED TO SAVE YOUR ASK AS A DRAFT I'M SO SORRY ANON </3 (i just wanted to do a fancy title color </3333 which thank u wyr for teaching me how!! i finally did it!!) they asked for a drabble with akaashi about a reader struggling in med school who isn't doing as well as she wants to but tries to keep it hidden but ends up breaking down in front of akaashi </3 i hope that's an acceptable synopsis of ur amazing idea anon </3 thank you sm for your request i loved writing this!!

akaashi x f!reader

written in 3rd pov

dialogue prompt from 1k followers event: ❤️‍🩹 -> "you deserve more"

"but still i'm alone, and that's what scares me the most. forgetting myself, forgetting what i said i would be." from clown car by lowertown

word count: 1.9k words

lots of hurt/comfort </33 akaashi and y/n are already in an established relationship

thank u to my very cool sister in med school whose experiences very heavily influenced this entire story which might very well be me tomorrow when i get my college test scores xx

NOT edited esp after i lost my draft the first time. tumblr, i have words to speak to u. the tumblr hq complaint list ree and me have formed gets longer everyday.

tokyo’s medical school program had been no joke. for as long as she could remember, she had wanted to be a nurse. she'd dreamed of it for so long that even when she didn’t initially pass the entry exam, she kept trying. it took her four times to finally get accepted. keiji had told her she was resilient, and their low acceptance rate was nothing she could control.

he was right, but she couldn’t help feeling worn down a little. she had known people who’d passed the exam on their first try, yet all her work up until that fourth retake hadn’t been enough. although they were in completely different majors, she subconsciously compared herself to keiji, as well. it made her sick to think that she was being left behind. while he had already finished his first year of university, she’d spent the twelve months completing prerequisites and working in a hospital, unable to do anything else.

she knew she couldn’t give up after coming so far, but things didn’t get easier once she made it into the program. keiji had already been busy enough with his own school work, but with the both of them trying to balance their classes, they didn’t find much time to do things outside of studying together. their daily routine became one of them buying coffee and meeting up at the library, staying there until it closed, and then walking home to collapse in bed together, falling asleep in each other’s arms.

the familiarity of their schedule was a stable anchor in both of their lives; neither of them minded daily study dates. it had always been this way since they met–being together was enough for both of them, they didn't need anything fancy. they showed their love for each other through looks from behind a computer screen and cold coffees with extra shots.

yet despite how hard she studied, she couldn’t help but feel like she was falling behind her peers. some of her classes she had passed by the skin of her teeth and when she compared that to her outstanding grades throughout all of high school, seeing even a B was enough to make her heart drop. even worse were C’s and D’s. although a part of her was just thankful to have passed all of her classes, she wanted to do better. she knew plenty of classmates who were struggling just as much as her–these classes weren’t meant to be easy, but when she continued to do worse than she wanted to, that didn’t stop her from feeling like a failure.

it was affecting her entire being; how confident she felt in her competency as a person and how much she was even contributing to the world. was it even worth it for her to continue studying medicine? was she worth all the money her friends and family had spent on her? worth the love keiji gave her? what if he found someone better?

one particular night in the library, her worries had overwhelmed her to the point of tears, and keiji had paused what he was doing to help her.

“i’m sorry, i'm distracting you from your work,” she had cried, trying to stop her tears, “you don’t have to help me or anything, i’m okay.”

“i’m not going to ignore you when you're crying, y/n,” he had said, voice filled with nothing but care and worry. “tell me what’s wrong,” he urged, moving around the table to sit next to her.

she’d explained her anxieties to him briefly that night, but she never wanted to inconvenience him again. even when she felt like she was drowning in her stress, she made sure to keep up a front around him. she could never erase the thought of how much better he deserved, despite his continued reassurance that there was no one better fit for him than her. 

their study dates had returned back to normal after that night. frequent trips to a coffee shop for another coffee resumed, and their stolen glances across the tables continued. she was currently working on a large presentation–an insurance project that would boost her grade if she was able to score at least an 80 on her upcoming final.

she felt good about the material; the project helped her study the chapters on top of the cramming she was already doing. her test scores in the class had averaged around somewhere in the 80s anyway and she felt confident she’d end the class with a good grade. keiji had reminded her of bokuto, who had barely gotten by in his high school classes, yet still graduated and made it out to be a talented volleyball player. although it was a completely different field from her, thinking about bokuto had helped her worry less about perfect grades. she wasn’t content with bare minimum grades that meant she was only just barely passing, but she’d been reminded that As weren't the standard and plenty of people had had successful careers despite struggling with school.

but perhaps she had got her hopes up too high, and everything seemed to fall apart when the notification popped up on her screen. 

not even an 80.

when keiji got home, the lights were off. his mentor at his internship had asked him to stay late and help with their current big project. it was a good opportunity and chance for experience, and he had texted her that he wouldn’t be coming home until later that day in order to keep working. she'd replied, telling him to be safe but had said nothing about a night shift at the hospital; she should've been home.

when he called for her, he didn’t get a response, and he was quick to put away his shoes before making his way to their bedroom. he didn’t think she’d be sleeping so early into the night, but perhaps she’d had a rough day.

then he remembered that her test score for her final exam was supposed to come out today.

the light pattering of rain on their roof was almost loud enough to mask the sniffle he heard, but the moonlight peaking through the curtain of their window illuminated her silhouette.

she was curled up on the wooden floor of their bedroom, leaning against the bed, and when he came around the side of the bed, he saw her tear-stained face, looking forward blankly.

“oh, my love—” his heart twisted at the sight of her, his chest tightening with nausea and guilt thinking about how he’d left her alone on the night she’d needed him the most. “did it not go well?” he asked softly, kneeling next to her with a hand on her back.

at the mention of the test, she choked out a sob as she shook her head and tried to hide her face, “no. i failed it, keiji. i failed the entire class.” through the hand on her back, he could feel the way her body was shaking as she tried to keep in her cries.

“let it out, love,” he whispered, encasing her in his arms and squeezing his own eyes shut. his heart hurt for her, imagining the pain she was going through. he heard it in the hiccups and whimpers that escaped her. she’d probably been here all night, and the thought only made him hug her all the more tightly. “they won’t kick you out of the program, right?” he asked.

“no, i get one strike. i’ll have to retake the class, but if i fail another one—” she didn’t finish, only letting out a shaky breath but he understood and he pulled away to hold her face, brushing away the tears that fell from her eyes with his thumbs.

“then it’ll be okay,” he tried to reassure her, “you have a second chance, and you’re going to do great. plenty of other people have failed, too. it’ll be okay. you’ll be okay, and i’ll be here to help you with whatever you need.”

she placed a hand over one of his own that was still on the side of her face, trying her best to calm her breathing down. “keiji,” she whispered, her lips trembling as she tried to hold back another sob that escaped her anyway.

“yes, dear?” he answered, trying to comfort her with a small smile, letting her know he was there and listening.

“why are you even with me?” her voice broke, as if it physically pained her to even say it. her hand dropped back down to the ground as her tears started falling again. “you deserve more. you deserve someone smarter. and better. i can’t even pass my class, what made me think i could do this? i wasn’t resilient for retaking the entrance exam, i was just being stubborn. i should never have been let in. i don’t deserve to be here.” she pressed her palms into her eyes, letting out ragged breaths that turned back into sobs when she pull herself back together.

her words hurt him even more than it hurt her to say. it pained him to hear how lowly she thought of herself when he thought she was the most admirable person he’d ever seen. he could tell the thoughts had been weighing heavily down on her for long–this was the result of pent up emotions she’d been stuffing down ever since that night she cried in the library. he knew that she hadn’t told him everything, but he had trusted that she would open up to him when she was ready.

he moved to grab hold of her hands, gently pulling them away from her face, “i’m with you because of your passion for this career, y/n.” he feels the way her hands start to relax in his hold and keeps going, “just because a test is difficult doesn’t mean you’re not right for this job, y/n. if you enjoy it and you’re passionate about it, that’s all that matters. the rest will come with time. and i know you’re passionate about this. i’ve seen how you treat others, you have so much kindness in your heart. you want to help others and that’s enough. a grade doesn’t define you or your future. i’m with you because you’re so much more than just a grade. i’m with you because i love you, i love your dreams, i’ve loved watching you work towards them, and i’ll be here to continue supporting you every step of the way.”

his words seem to get through to her and her tears start to dry, “do you really mean it?” her voice is just barely above a whisper.

“every single word, love. i love you more than i can put into words and i think everything about you is beautiful. your passion and spirit and the way you carry yourself. i'm the one who doesn't deserve you, i look up to you so much," he tells her, shifting to sit against the bed next to her.

she laughs, pushing at him playfully, “don’t start turning this around to criticize yourself. here, how about we make a deal: if i deserve you, then you deserve me.”

“deal,” he agrees, grabbing her hand to hold it between his, rubbing it gently, “as long as i get to be with you for the rest of my life.”

she sighs, looking up towards the ceiling, “if that’s what you want.”

“it is,” he tells her, turning her head gently to face him as he presses a kiss to her lips, “i want you more than anything else.”

[anthonys237thfreckle]

I've been NEEDING some Javi & Scott angst, like the first night when Javi and Kate didn't set up the panel? (feel free to do romantic or platonic 🙏🙏)

I WROTE THIS BUT I DIDNT SAVE THE DRAFT

anyways here it is! i dont really write for scott but after a lot of research, i finally did! i rly hope this is okay lmao. Not the best at character x character, but theres a first time for everything!

i’m pretty inspired so i’ll write some javi x reader angst after this lol (i have sm free time until august 12th guys KEEP EM COMING)

please read the plot modification below, enjoy!

I love you, it’s ruining my life - Javier ‘Javi’ Rivera x Scott

prompt: Javi and Scott get into a heated argument

plot modification: Javi and Scott are still dating here!

TW: argument, mention of PTSD, getting shamed for PSTD, an explicit hand gesture, swearing

On the way to meeting Marshall Riggs, Javi and Scott’s investor, the tension in the car was thicker than the humid air in Oklahoma this summer. Neither said a word, Javi had his jaw clenched as he gripped the steering wheel, tight as a vice, his veins on his forearms showing. Scott looked out the window, chewing on his bottom lip, fiddling with the sunglasses in his hand, trying not to snap them out of pure impulse.

Scott’s mood was as sour as the unripe blueberries he’d grow to resent at the supermarket, chiding Javi for not being able to pick out produce; it was these little things that made him toxic - Javi was growing irritated.

Though, he was no saint either. Often biting back in arguments on how Scott grew to despise homosexual couples who lived perfect, happy lives with accepting parents in an accepting environment, how he can ‘never truly be happy for people who deserve it’.

Their relationship was hanging by a thread, and it was being teased by a razor.

Kate Carter.

“I still think we should head to El Reno” Javi said, shattering the silence “You know, Kate and I were talking-”

“Oh my god, do you ever shut up about her?” Scott snapped, turning his head sharply to meet his even sharper gaze. Javi looked at him with bewilderment, and Scott rolled his eyes

“You really trust her word after she lost that picture perfect storm, Javi?” Scott said bitterly

“It wasn’t her fault” Javi said firmly, turning to meet Scotts gaze with his own equally sharp one.

“She got super overwhelmed, that storm brought out some bad memories for her” Javi explained for what felt like the hundredth time for him. He was tired of having to defend his best friend from his boyfriend, and Scott had been getting on his nerves more than he cared to admit. Just as he thought Scott was done being a prick, he only proved he wasn’t.

“Well, someone should keep their emotions in check” He scoffed, rolling his eyes. Javi looked at him, a storm in his eyes.

“Okay, Scott, what the fuck.” Javi said, having enough of him. The anger and hurt was coursing through his veins, slipping into his tone.

“She has no goddamn ‘instincts’” Scott said with air quotes “She used a god damned dandelion to track our first storm.” He said, Kate’s more traditional ways clearly being judged by his more scientific ones.

“She grew up here, she knows what she’s doing” Javi defended “You know, Scott, you’re being a dick to her” Javi said, unimpressed. he turned his attention back to the road.

“We were real close in college. I know Kate, she has a god awful lot of potential” Javi said in a low tone, his message almost a threat.

“You should just date her at this point” Scott replied coldly. Javi was hot with rage. “Why is it whenever some straight, pretty girl comes along in my life you get so goddamn jealous?!” Javi snapped “She’s my best friend for god’s sake. We’ve been through some serious shit together” “So you think she’s pretty?!” Scott said, equally mad now.

“You know what?” Javi yelled, in a dangerous fury “Fuck you, Scott. I’m done. With you, with Storm Par, with exploiting innocent lives and being unethical.” He slammed on the breaks, unbuckled his seatbelt and left the car, not sparing a glance at Scott, who was surprised, but didn’t fight it. The relationship wasn’t worth fighting anymore.

It was ruining their lives

“Yeah, go run off to your girlfriend!” Scott yelled back at Javi, who winced. He wanted to say that his relationship with Kate was purely platonic, but he didn’t want to give Scott the satisfaction of pissing him off with his remark. But then again, by yelling back, he’d get the satisfaction of making Javi defensive.

So without looking back, Javi raised his fist, lifted his middle finger, and held it out for Scott, walking away on the dirt road in the opposite direction. He didn’t know where, he didn’t know for how long, he just knew he needed the air.

[miloxo]

why i should win lasko's #1 fan award :3 @plaqying

1. lasko LOVER since 2021

2. first redacted audio was a lasko audio ^o^

3. certified lasko YAPPER

me in my old 2021-2023 private server

me in @sereh624 's server

me in my irl friend group's gc (all of them r not redacted fans..)

4. got back into drawing after a multiple year long hiatus to bring my 3 year old lasko design to life... pretty.....

5. im married to him

6. personality-wise, i am literally him irl ask any of my friends

7. this post i found in my drafts from 2022

(translation: i love lasko sm like my god hes so pretty in fanart???? and his voice?,,???? hes so cute)

8. a couple days ago i couldnt do anything for like 4 hours my brain was plagued with lasko and i couldnt think of anything else.

9. related to 4, i lost interest in redacted for over a year and got back into it because of lasko

10. lasko is one of my favorite characters in ALL of the media ive ever been interested in (hes top 5)

11. for probably 2 weeks straight i fell asleep to "your submissive boyfriend steps up to comfort you during a storm". i woke up energized and happy everyday.

12. i love lasko more than i love my boyfriend (not really but almost)

if lasko was real and i had a chance id leave my bf for him (boyfriend said this)

13. someone posted a tiktok ranking each character's usefulness during the inversion with lasko at #9 and in reaction i left 6 comments with 3 of them explanations of why he was one of few reasons everyone didnt die during that series

14. ilove lasko..... i love lasko!!!!

15. right before making this i had a crisis questioning if i even deserved beong nominated for this award and how lasko deserves better and more active fans. really shows my love for him

16. this...

17. when i first made my ao3 account , my username was laskosbitch (#freak)

18. moots with one of my competition for a while now i think. looking at u @morgansplace

19. the SINGLE fandom fic ive written is a lasko fic

20. ???,!,!??!,!?!,!??! i DO love lasko more than my boyfriend

+5 in our discord dm and another +4 on tumblr, totalling to 211 lasko mentions while talking to my bf

21. "leader of laskonation" role in @/sereh624 's server

that concludes my presentation . PLEASE CONSIDER!!!!!

[imthetunnelunderoceanblvd]

can you do a noncon threesome with Lyle, Quaritch, and a human!fem!reader where she begs them not to cum inside her but no. they have to fill her up with their cum. a lot of teasing and praise/degradation too?? ty!! I love ur writing

milk without the honey.

ִֶָ 𖥔ﾟ— synposis : getting cornered in a dark room was something you didnt wish for; you wonder why it happened to you, you wonder why they chose to do that to you, questions swam in your head as you struggled and screamed and wriggled around trying to get them off of you, one of them put his hand on your mouth in order to muffle your screams.

ִִֶֶָ 𖥔ﾟ— warnings : cnc, degrading, p in v, double penetration, oral (fem rec.), praising, threesome (m/m/f), no plot, no mentions of y/n, no proof reading.

ִִֶ 𖥔ﾟ— pairing : lyle x reader x quaritch

ִֶָ 𖥔ﾟ— a/n : CNC??? I HAD TO WRITE IT. also im so sorry i didnt reply faster.. ive been busy with life sm happened and i forgot everything about my requests and my drafts imma try to finish as much as i can today. tysm for requesting !! <3. also !!! comments are highly appreciated unless theyre bad ones... keep em for urself >< !! have fun reading! i hope you enjoy ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

"you like that? you like being touched by us? hmm? tell me, baby, do you like the way we touch you?" lyle said from behind you, his cock thrusting inside your walls, his breath hot on your neck as he held you close to him to keep you balanced with his fingers in your mouth muffling your screams.

"she sure does…" quaritch said from between your legs, breathing on your cunt the lifting his hand to collect your wetness.

"look how wet she is, just like a little whore;" lyle smirked.

"that right princess? youre a whore for us, yeah?"

you had tears running down your face;

you were trying to fight back at first, tried to scream, cried for someone to help you but you were in an isolated room, you knew it was impossible for anyone to hear you but you tried, now you gave up, you let them use you however they want, became their experimental game.

your face twitched as your felt your orgasm approaching, quaritch felt your pussy throbbing as he lapped at your clit, without a warning, he slipped a finger inside of your vagina, his finger deep down to the knuckle inside of you, the act was excruciating for you but you liked it and you let out a soft muffled moan.

quaritch pulled away right before you climaxed. "get ready, imma gonna put my cock inside your tiny cunt, you g'na like it,"

you were too tired to argue back and just sat there waiting as lyles fingers left your mouth to play with your tits, pinching and rolling your nipple between his fingers as he sucked on the flesh of your neck.

"you gonna let everybody know that i fucked you? gonna let em know you belong to daddy? hm?" lyle talked to you while quaritch slammed his cock inside of you and you moaned loudly.

you had quaritchs and lyles cocks inside of you, both cocks rubbing on each other making them twitch inside of you, quaritchs hand went to your neck, choking you til your eyes widened and your lips went blue in color.

"p – plea – hh – se.. plea–!

s–top"

quaritch was amused by your beggings and after a few seconds of holding you there, he withdrew his hand from your neck.

lyle was groaning like a wild animal and quaritch gave him a knowing look. "gonna let us cum inside your tiny cunt?" quaritch said and your eyes widened as you shook your head 'no'.

"no – please s – stop – no.. please

pleasepleasepleaseplease.. dont please.." you had started crying and quaritch just smirked while lyle was lost in the feeling of your cunt tightening around both cocks.

"gonna pump my seed right inside of you, baby," quaritch said with a groan.

"wanna have our kids inside of ya?"

"she sure — she sure does!"

you closed your eyes and cried. "please no please stop please stop please stop.." you started rambling as your thighs started to shake and your muscles spasm and just like that you release on quaritchs pubic region.

"what a good bitch… coating me with your pretty fluids,"

"ha.. see colonel, told ya she a catch,"

both men smirked as they twitched inside your body.. once… twice…

they released inside of you, one after the other, and you were left alone in that room, laying down on the floor feeling useless and disgusting.

you were disgusted with yourself. disgusted with the idea of you enjoying it. and that was true, you were disgusting because you liked every bit of it, so laying down with your legs shaking, with spit and cum drying on your pussy, you reached down to touch yourself.

[cumulo-ghoulll]

Copia HC 🔵🔴🟢

(ft. Mary Goore and Doyle Wolfgang Von Frankenstein)

Copia, Doyle, and Mary being the ultimate trio of friends? Methinks so!

Mary initially friends with both Copia and Doyle separately but introduced the two to each other.

Alternately, they've all been friends since they were kids and have watched each others personalities and musical careers grow

Mary and Doyle getting on like a house on fire (with a few houses actually being set on fire along the way)

Mary and Doyle writing songs about dead people and being unstoppable forces and Copia proudly showing them his song about his favourite animal

Mary and Doyle going to watch Copia sing and getting front row seats so Copia can see them

The trio wearing each other's merch

Doyle sharing stories about being in Misfits while Copia and Mary laugh at his funny anecdotes

Doyle and Mary talking about guitars and Copia pretending to have any idea what they're on about

Mary and Doyle getting drunk on cheap beer and Copia looking around Mary's flat for some well aged wine (he learns to bring his own next time)

Doyle and Copia watching Mary play their first gig in some dingy bar, only getting payed $20, and still hyping them up after the show

Copia taking his jacket back to one of the ministry tailors because Doyle ripped a seam in the arms when he tried it on

Doyle and Copia poking fun at Mary for being so skinny

Copia taking Mary clothes shopping to expand their wardrobe past old band shirts and skinny jeans

Doyle and Mary trying to convince Copia to go the Grammys. "You never know, you might win something!" "For once."

Mary and Doyle being the first people Copia called after his plastic surgery, not Seestor.

Copia sending Mary and Doyle pictures of his new stage outfits to get their opinion

Doyle taking Copia and Mary to the gym. Mary who's surprisingly strong and Copia who only just manages to squeak Doyle's name for help after picking up a weight way too heavy for him

Copia taking Doyle and Mary back to the ministry to meet the pack. Mary who's secretly terrified of the ghouls and Doyle who immediately becomes best friends with Aether and Swiss

Mary and Doyle sneaking in to the church to see Copia's papal anointment

Doyle helping to look after the ghoul kits on the weekends

The trio having movie nights together

Doyle who lights Mary's cigarette and Copia who snatches it out their mouth. "Those things can kill you you know." "I'm already dead!"

The trio who swap paint designs and dress up as eachother for Halloween

The trio going to build a bear together and picking out the dumbest matching names for their stuffies

The trio who go on vacation together. Mary who insists on doing pub crawls, Copia who drives them round the whole of Sweden insisting he knows the perfect place to get coffee, and Doyle who's incharge of taking pictures, holding the map, and keeping the money safe

UGH I LOVE THEM SM!! I could literally write about them forever. They're all my babygirls!!

(also I had so many more ideas but i forgot to save it in my drafts properly so I lost a lot of them 😭😭)

[imagionationstation]

Heyya! I hope your break from social media was nice! :D

I just wanted to say I love your writing both on here and ao3, and find myself looking through your character and episode analysis on here a lot when I need inspiration.

I drew some art of your separated feral donnie au and i hope you like it. Hope ya doing well! :D

Okay, hear me out, I saw your post and I made a response and then Tumblr deleted it so I got upset and walked away with the intent to come back and reblog it later and totally forgot.

There is a reason that I never get to Asks even though I spent all day thinking of how I'll respond until one thing interrupts and now that Ask is lost to my drafts until I stumble upon it months later-

The memory loss is strong with this one.

Also, thank you sm. I adore when people can use my random stuff to positively influence their writing/art. That's literally why I write them, because I fully realize that there's a lot that can go under the radar and it's not fair of me to wonder why people only notice the bad when I have never stepped out to share the good.

THE PUBLIC DESERVES TO KNOW.

Plus, there's not nearly enough 2012 Donnie fanfiction out there, so I do my absolute best to fill that hole. I love to make converts. CONVERTS TO THE DONNIE FANCLUB CAUSE.

Because I like him and all that he does a normal amount <3

BUT ANYWAY LOOK AT HIM- THE FERAL CHILD!

He. Is. So. Realistic. I CAN'T EVEN BECAUSE THAT'S HIM.

The little gap- the big brown eyes- the cracked plastron and the scarring around his throat and the symbol on his chest- MAN.

HE'S SO ABUSED AND HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW IT.

Like I look at him and his little crouch and his squinty glare that looks like this boi needs glasses because he doesn't know how to properly glare or even have a mean bone in his body my gosh his big brown eyes are right from my brain he's so innocent I CAN'T-

YOU GUYS ARE MAKING ME EVEN MORE NUTS OVER MY OWN AU AND I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT'S POSSIBLE-

NOW DON'T GET ME STARTED AT HIS LITTLE HISS.

Honestly, this kid wouldn't hurt so much as a cockroach, but if that monitor even considers shocking his Friend again he will learn to change his ways, so help him-

[kimdokjas]

tag games! 💌

i'm so late and i'm 100% sure i missed several of these because tumblr only keeps notifications for the last ??? who knows how many months. so sorry for the delay! i promise i wasn't ignoring them i genuinely just forgot 😭

edit: i had this drafted since january 18 and i forgot to post it. again 💀 i'm leaving it exactly as it was as a capsule in time for myself though

~~

tagged by @orviposition @karura @misakarose @hansooyung @milaghoul - thank you for the tag mira, may, tay, roy, and mila! 💕💕 these were actually three separate tag games but since they were really similar i decided to combine them!

tag someone you want to know AND/OR some of your besties

favorite color: blue!

3 ships: yoohankim (orv), llojavi (tged), shiguang (sgdr)

first ship ever: merthur (? genuinely can't remember sorry my liege)

last song: IS - sue

currently listening to: dizzy bezerko album by unlike pluto (nothing but bangers it's insane)

last movie: children who chase lost voices (2011)

currently watching: sabikui bisco, a sign of affection, cherry magic, mr. villain's day off, solo leveling, 7th time loop, dungeon meshi

other stuff I watched this last year: my main obsessions were buddy daddies, trigun stampede, moriarty the patriot

shows I dropped this last year/didn't finish: i rarely drop shows but i had to pause to your eternity bc it was making me cry too hard lmaoo

currently reading: the greatest estate developer, sabikui bisco, lord of the mysteries, thriller trainee, and a bunch of manhwa/manhua

currently consuming: coffee (decaf bc caffeine is now poison to me)

currently craving: idk i think a cinnamon roll could fix me actually

currently working on: crocheting a snoopy-themed gift for my mom's bday!

current obsession: tged brainrot babeyyy

sweet/spicy/savory? savory!

relationship status: happily single amen

last thing I googled: ranjatai

~~

tagged by @aomitois thank you tem! 💞

Which feeling that has no name are you?

~~

tagged by @userfrieren thank you sm for tagging me jenna! 💖

alias/name: gaby

birthday: sep 3

zodiac: virgo

height: too tall

hobbies: reading novels, playing video games, making gifs

favourite colour: blue

favourite book: omniscient reader's viewpoint !!!!! it changed my life please read it i am on my knees

last song: 云与海 - 阿YueYue

last movie/show: the middle

recent read: i think the last thing i finished was mdzs (i say this when i haven't even managed to finish the extras lol)

inspiration: finding something that hits like orv is what keeps me going ngl

story behind url: idc if i have a kim dokja url i WILL beat the kdj kinnie allegations 💪

fun fact: i know at least the basics of 11 languages!

what’s the colour palette of your name?

(duplicated image for sizing) i actually love this! these are all colors that i would normally wear bc i'm a big fan of subdued shades with a slight touch of earth tones!

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tagged by @sugaaz and @hansooyung to do this picrew! thank you moon and roy 💕

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tagged by @koushuwu to do this picrew! tysm mica this was so cool! 💖

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tagged by @sawaisanna to post a wip - thank you malina! 💞

i don't have any edits in the works atm, but here's a wip from a fic i'll likely never post.

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top six reads of 2023

tagged by @tls123 - tysm francesca! 💖

global examination by 木苏里 *

devil venerable also wants to know by 青色羽翼

thriller trainee by 妄鸦 *

the book of disquiet by fernando pessoa

mist unlimited by 微风几许

camera lucida by roland barthes

(*) haven't finished these yet

first things first can i just point out how fucking funny it looks to list danmei and philosophical books together bc it's sending me 😭

i read relatively "few" books in 2023 but that's only because i spent the most time reading two monstrous books that unfortunately didn't make it to my top 6 :/ (iykyk)

it seems like 2023 was the year of narratives that break out of their confines, self-awareness, and deconstructing paradigms <3

~~

💫 preference 💫

tagged by @aomitois - tysm tem!

ancient or modern

bitter or sweet

chocolate or vanilla

coffee or tea

create or destroy

day or night

early bird or night owl

freckles or dimples

gold or silver

greek mythology or egyptian mythology

macarons or eclairs

hot or cold

thunder or lightning

typewritten or handwritten

secret garden or secret library

spicy or mild

dark magic or light magic

virtue or vice

ocean or desert

moon or stars

rough or smooth

mermaids or sirens

known or unknown

rain or snow

~~

tagging for any of these: (no pressure!) @icythot-bakubitch @ruanbaijie @feitanporter @itoshisae @dokjaism

@mudanonaito @himawaari @aroacehirano @mauxanhduong @apparently-artless

@72g @miyamiwu @focryst @justapieceintheirgames @smol-ackerman + anyone else who wants to join!

[dizzythegreat]

Keeper of the Lost Cities meta: a hopefully-not-too-critical analysis

Starting off by saying that this whole thing is a just little too pretentious and a just little too fueled by irritation so don't take everything I say as fact! I'm just kind of ranting about things that I feel like most people are annoyed with (?) please share your thoughts with me! I think it's important for discourse like this to happen to keep fandoms alive!! non-Keeper mutuals feel free to DISREGARD!

First of all Keeper has such a special place in my heart, I started reading the series when I was 12 and I'm 16 now, so I really did kind of grow up with the books. I LOVED the series as a kid and hyperfixated on it for a really long time. As the series progresses and as I read it from a different lens, I'm seeing all of the flaws so much more clearly, so this whole rant basically stems from realizing something so special to me is flawed media and wanting to get my thoughts somewhere. All of this comes from a loving place! I'm just putting down my top few issues with the series and my opinions on a lot of different elements <3

DISCLAIMER I'm doing a reread but I'm only on book 1 and my memory is shit. Any false information is literally not my fault leave me alone

1. Length, redundancy, and predictability

This one really starts in Flashback #7 for me. It will always, always evade me why that book contains ~300 straight pages of Sophitz fluff and fucking around in the healing center. I know that a lot of people enjoyed those parts, which is totally valid! Shipping is a cornerstone of this series! But for me it felt so pointless and fan servicey, idk. And this is maybe my biggest problem with the books: they drag. We're at 9 and a half books now, each spanning like 500-800 pages, and the plot drags and drags and drags. I don't know if Shannon's publisher makes her fill a certain number of pages or what, but I feel like at least 100 pages of bullshit could be cut from each book and nothing would change. They start to almost follow a formula: 200 or so pages of figuring out the Neverseen's plan of the hour, another 200-ish to plan how to defeat them, and then finally we learn that the Neverseen is actually always one step ahead and the crew gets crushed oh my god tragic!! It worked as a subversion of expectations the first couple times but by now I feel like most people could basically just predict what's going to happen in any given book. Sometimes I wonder got left on the cutting room floor because it feels like SM wrote a first draft, barely trimmed it down, and published just that. The plot spins in circles, the protagonists are confused yet again, I am pulling my hair out in chunks.

It's a huge turn-off to a lot of new readers seeing these super thick books, and it's even a turn-off to me when I do rereads because surprise surprise, I don't actually really give a fuck if Fitz likes Sophie back, or at least not enough to read 300 pages on it per book. If the books were more concise, not only would that fix a lot of the plot and character development issues, it would also make them way more digestible because to be honest with you I probably couldn't remember half of what happens in most of them.

2. Sophie...

I think this is a very polarizing opinion but I just kind of don't like Sophie as a main character? I honestly think she's fallen victim to becoming a Mary Sue and not even in a "wehhh powerful woman make me mad" type way! It's just that Sophie at her fullest power is undeniably the most powerful elf in a battle, so to counteract this, Shannon has to keep finding ways for the Neverseen to take away Sophie's power. Whether through the whole "she can only inflict everyone at once" thing or breaking every bone in her hand or creating forcefields or literally fucking anything to stop this kid with five million superpowers, they have to find a way to effectively tie her down so the battles seem somewhat realistic. This then creates a weird pattern where every battle goes one of two ways: Neverseen finds a way to effectively debilitate Sophie and all her friends, or she just goes fucking sicko mode and destroys everyone. You just can't have a main character who's this much ahead of everyone else in terms of raw power.

For me, I think the biggest issue with Sophie is she's not relatable to the average reader. The age demographic for Keeper is preteens and teens. How many 13 year olds are the most powerful, unstoppable person in their friend group, in which three hot guys are head-over-heels in love with them, living in very comfortable conditions, with like five hundred friends? If you were that fucking baller at 13 then go fuck yourself that's super cool for you! But the core pillars of Sophie's life, disregarding the all the magical stuff (which obviously requires some suspension of disbelief) are simply not relatable or recognizable to the average reader. So how are we as readers supposed to feel connected to Sophie's life and situation if we never have (and let's face it, never will) experience anything close to the more realistically human parts of her life?

3. Character development (and the lack thereof)

Say what you will but to me the character development is so pale and arguably just doesn't exist. It feels like everyone has become so one-dimensional, so predictable, and so limp. Sophie has it the worst because we read from her POV, so all of her quirks and thoughts become really fucking annoying to read over and over again. For example, The whole oblivious "omg does Dex like me? does Keefe like me? DO I LIKE FITZ???" thing was cute when she was 12 back in book one but by now I am genuinely tearing my hair out when I have to read "Sophie blushed" every two pages. The whole "I'm a freak and nothing I do ever works and all is hopeless" thing was easy to feel sympathy for the first few times, but by now it's just kind of... exhausting? It feels like the naïve, oblivious Sophie from book 1 is exactly the same person as Stellarlune Sophie, no matter how many hideouts SM makes her burn down to prove she's ruthless or something. At this point, I feel like Sophie's choices throughout the series end up either being really predictable or wildly out of left field.

Every character other than Fitz, Keefe, and Sophie (and you could make a case for the three of them too) have become a shadow of themselves and they all get at most two conversations worth of pagetime. This can be attributed to a lot of things that I don't feel like talking about so here they are in point form: excessive focus on the main "love triangle", overloaded cast of protagonists, too much emphasis on A) furthering the plot and B) Sophie's inner thoughts instead of character relationships and found family. I think the books have lost sight of the original love, trust, and bond created by the five mains, and those super interesting dynamics between the different sets of friends that were so abundant in the first few installements have become few and far between. When I was a kid, I loved the books for the warm friendships and soft moments between Sophie and Dex, and now we're lucky if they even really talk to each other if not to push the plot. Biana barely exists, Marella and Linh show up every once in a while to be gay as fuck and then leave, Stina turned nice and then immediately went back to being a bitch because SM, for some reason, un-did all her redemption, and everyone else fucks around until they're plot-relevant. Where's the squad where's the crew where's the homoerotic undertones?!

4. Miscellaneous whining

Fitz's character is wildly inconsistent imo. I love you Sophie but I'm going to consistently get mad at you over irrelevant things and ice you out even though you need my support! Your boyfriend is for the streets girl

Fuck this whole half-book thing I'm sorry. Understandably, things have slowed down now that SM has two kids and I'm really truly happy for her and I'm glad she's taking time out of her work for herself and her family. But when she keeps releasing these weird novellas every year as some kind of "solution", it really just seems like a cop-out or a cash grab. I wish we could tell Shannon that we don't necessarily need a 700+ page novel to consider it a book! I personally would love if book 10 was more concise!! Let's just get this plot moving a bit!!

Sophie burning Gisela's book BURNS MY BLOOD. SM just had no fucking idea what she wanted that book to say + it would probably end the series too quick so she got Sophie to burn the most crucial piece of information they could have ever used under pretense of "refusing to follow Gisela's trap" or whatever OH MY GOD

Sooo many dropped plot lines/plot holes there is no way this shit is being resolved in the next 1 and a half books. See you all in 2034 for book 13.125

Sokeefe endgame was great but so predictable. Half the reason most people read this series is for the will-they-won't-they thing with Sophie, Fitz, and Keefe (justice for Dex!), and I think it was executed very badly. You could predict that Sophie and Fitz would burn out, you could predict that she would end up with Keefe, there was net 0 suspense by the time Fitz made his 500th dick move. I know I just complained about things being stretched out for so long but this one could have done with some taking it slow without making it obvious what was going to happen

Can Marella and Linh just kiss already

Anyways this all comes from a place of loving frustration. Oh Keeper my love, look what has become of you. Ultimately, SM started a fantasy series without knowing the ending, and it's spun out of control, but what can you do? I appreciate the series for what it is, I wish it was better, but I'll always love it. Through all my bitching and moaning I'm still rereading it to this day so who's really winning here? Please rb and comment and dm I love discussing Keeper!!! If you think I'm an idiot tell me!!! If you agree with me tell me!!! Don't be a dick!! Thanks for making it this far! Don't forget to like and subscribe and smash that bell

[spacehostilityy]

rewatch nnt with me s2ep13-18

Hey boiz this is a draft from the summer but i want to enjoy interests again so it's getting published (ps i have an even cringier sideblog now @sillyspacehostilityy where i can rb things and not clog up y'all's feeds heehee)

it’s going by so fast 😭 BUT im gonna reread/actually finish the manga so it’s fine

“what do you think youre doing with her???” he’s making out with her Jericho, it’s kinda obvious

“I don’t think i like you. 😕” kwjfnlfsfighskfgl lollll

NEW INTROOOOO my second fave theme song too hehe

also the angst on this one is so good

there goes ban’s shirt. again

I honestly love Elaine’s rage, i wish they had left her just a tiny bit more fucked up. bc he exploding like that makes sense after all that she’s been through

cat fightttt. this does NOT pass the bechdel test

“asleep or awake, you’re the only thing that man thinks about” ouchie

mmm mind control anguish delicious

ban hearing that meliodas is the “traitor of the demon race” and just rolling with it<3

“Oh wait that was two! sorryyy i lost count” such a sassy little man i love him

ban has a pure and beautiful soul🥺

catch me crying over melban hahahaaaa

hendy looks cute in the tavern uniform tho haha

:(

im just glad they kill galand quick so zhivago can return to his son in a peaceful death

the “dad” KILLS MEEEE

im in love with deldry. which i guess is her whole thing

deldry and arden tho... 👀👀👀

actually so impressed with Jericho

galand liking golf is canon. do with this information what you will

IM SO EXCITED FOR ESCANOR HEEHEE

wait how did i forget Escanor’s tavern is called my sweet glutton thats so cute🥺🥺

escanor is so babygirl i love him so fucking much

i love them so much too

IN ENGLISH ESCANOR SAYS HE’S FEELING CHARITABLE FOR LETTING MELASCULA GO BUT IN SPANISH HE SAYS HES FEELING FEMINIST LOLLLL

Ban and King brother in law relationship is actually the funniest possible relationship in this show

Diane constantly wanting to eat hawk sparks joy

gilfrost kinda hot, sad that hes literally just vivian :/

howzer saying “that’s our diane” after she uses double hammer and she winks at him...

theyre just rlly cute im sorrry

no bc why does sir nanashi seem like a western portrayed japanese stereotype in japanese media?

arthur and meliodas are so cute i want to see them interact more !!

I LOVE MELIODAS AND BAN SM their funny little deranged rituals are so cute 🤪

rip to arthur tho he looked terrified lol

im going to cry like a bitch when they get reunited in purgatory

why does meliodas call Hawk “bovine bastard”? Bovine means cow or beef. As someone from Texas, i am intimately familiar with livestock classifications and i am CONFUSED. it should be porcine

tiny griamore is so fucking cute on hendy’s back😭

but ban looks fucking terrifying what is up with his face lol

I cant believe escanor almost got fucking taken out by gloxinia lol hes so much stronger than him

the start of arthur and nanashi’s friendship !!

gloxinia’s substitute looking like gerheade 😭

shes so beautiful 🥺

I love the implication that Elaine WAS in fact going to kill them lol

Ban: I KNOW you didn’t just call me a baby *hand gets torn off*

Meliodas: uhh Ban, what just happened to your hand??

Ban: don’t you change the subject >:/

king is about to die from being too horny damn

bro why is dreyfus so fucking ripped bitch got me blushing like DAMN

[thatswhatsushesaid]

tagged (kinda) by @mingguangsword!

i lost my first draft of this post 😭 let's try again.

1. why did you choose your url? because i am weak for puns, and because i am actually su she. weepy yet defensive lestat de lioncourt at the end of s2 voice, i am him, he is me.

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them. a whole whack of them:

@dailyayao which is just daily screenshots and scans of jin guangyao from all versions of the mdzs canon

@yaozongzhupressoffice my neglected satire blog where i answer asks and reblog stuff in-character as yao-zongzhu. occasionally will make references to his entirely heterosexual feelings for his very good friend ouyang-zongzhu in the tags.

@itwasabeautifulwebbing my minthara baenre from baldur's gate 3 simping blog lol. it's also turning into a catch-all for various video game nonsense, tho i'm definitely not as active there as i am here.

@fakerashid same deal as above, just for armand from amc's interview with the vampire.

3. how long have you been on tumblr? i first joined back in 2011 with a different username back in the migration of the dragon age fandom from livejournal to tumblr, and have been kicking around in some form or another ever since.

4. do you have a queue tag? sure do! 'moling queue' because, as i said, i'm weak for puns.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? originally this blog had a different username, and i started it with the intention of cross-posting very serious horror fiction thinkpieces from a wordpress site. obviously i stopped doing that and have been enjoying myself a lot more here since i stopped taking myself so seriously lmao.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp? i don't understand the question, that's literally me, su-zongzhu. (please god recognize this is a joke)

7. why did you choose your header? i just think jgy and sms look very powerful and dapper together in that scene. 😌

8. what’s your post with the most notes? some unfortunate ides of march shitpost that broke containment within an hour, i have it muted and hope to never think about it again.

9. how many mutuals do you have? no idea. lots? lots and lots?

10. how many followers do you have? 1271 as of this morning.

11. how many people do you follow? apparently 400 on the nose

12. have you ever made a shitpost? absolutely not, i don't have a sense of humour or believe in laughter.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? every time my attention wanders pretty much lmfao (despondent)

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? never!!!! 😬

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts? i ignore them.

16. do you like tag games? yes!

17. do you like ask games? "i love them, but i don't like chain asks" <- same hat

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? "probably ray" <- oh no oh dear 😬 i think if i qualify as tumblr famous (doubt.jpeg) then probably a bunch of my mutuals are, too.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? i am boring and married so no.

20. what is the last song you listened to? this performance of the famous "flowing water" composition for the guqin.

21. what are you currently watching? nirvana in fire, and it's consumed my soul. mei changsu 👀...... /clenches my fist

22. sweet/ savoury/ spicy? "savory"! <- correct!!!

23. what is your current relationship status? "literally on my way to break up with someone T_T i'll be single in a few hours!!!" <- omg fennel!!??? um, as i said above, i'm married! no plans to divorce mr. sushesaid, he surprised me with flowers and takeout from my favourite indian restaurant yesterday because i was having a rough day.

24. what is your current obsession? jin guangyao. it's still jin guangyao. it's probably going to be jin guangyao this time next year too.

25. what are nine albums/ songs you've been listening to lately?

it's not an album, but basically all of the ensemble and solo performances by zi de guqin studio on youtube.

return to cookie mountain, tv on the radio

the wellermen's album of shanties and other arranged covers

the hades 2 videogame soundtrack

the baldur's gate 3 videogame soundtrack

the chain, fleetwood mac

all of the lyrical ballads from the kentucky route zero videogame soundtrack (are u noticing a pattern, because i am)

the haven videogame soundtrack

the assassin's creed valhalla videogame soundtrack

tagging: @ratheralark @holy--milk @carnivorous-horses-lover @sunriseverse @watertightvines @frodo-of-the-nine-fingers @confusion-and-more @occasionalinanity @varethinsilico @thepurplewombat @peacocksdance and anyone else who puts eyes on this thing and feels moved to complete it.

[pinkwinesupernovas]

(this is a lot of yapping sorry in advance babe)

dear zel,

i miss you rn so i'm writing this for you in english class and probably the class afterwards knowing me, (edit in printmaking period two, yes i am still writing this hehe)

i'm gonna be totally honest i'm literally writing my english assesment about you bc i was lost for inspiration and the promt fit soooo it's about our freindship hehe ily. i'm not totally sure if i'll submit this one for the final thing but writing about you makes me happy which is sappy as hell but i don't feel embarassed abt it bc you make me feel very safe to be embarrassingly sappy with you <3 i will send you the thing eventually even if i don't hand it in for marking but i don't think i'm allowed to post it cause it's school related so i'll send it on discord when i finish the first draft hehe <3 (i wrote 600 words about you in one hour that is lowkey scary)

also i'm going to yap about you nowww because i love youuuu mwah <3

i'm literally so glad we're friends, i'm not sure what our first interaction was but i think it was for your event?? and i am forever grateful for it i'm so glad we're friends you're literally one of my fav people i've met on this app i love you with my whole heartttt

one thing i loveee abt you is that i don't feel scared to spam your asks or tag you in one million things, idek what it is but you make me feel very safe to be sappy and clingy and i love that bc with most people i overthink whether i should send them things but with you i don't even hesitate bc ik you'll respond well and i love thatttt <3 you also match my enthusiasm and send lots of asks back and i love that sm <3

i literally adore talking to you bc you're such a sweet and kind person i'm lowkey in awe of it like how is one person so lovely you just light up the world ugh i love you sm, you're so fun to talk to and i just love you smmm (i hate timezones but six hours will not seperate us i love yapping with you too much)

alsooo just so you know, in my mind we're in a field of flowers together picking flowers and yapping while we eat pastries from a cute little bakery and drink like iced matcha or something that's my dream <333 i wish we could live closer bc i just know i'd love baking with you and stargazing and just dong cute little things whenever we wanted, just know that whenever i like your posts thats actually me mentally giving you a flower or two bc ily <3

also what i feel for you can be kind of wrapped up with a few songs so here: birds of a feather by billie, glue song by bea and clairo, the last one by maisie, feels like by gracie, and lots more but those are the songs that i can't listen to without thinking of you <3

ahhhhhh i'm still at school and stupid school wifi blocks tumblr AND discord (i've tried literally EVERY vpn i can it's so annoying ughhh) so i'll have to send this when i get home but just know i was thinking of you allllllll day at school and i miss you and i love you sm <3

okayyy this is written proof that i'm literally a proffessional yapper i've been adding to this on my notesapp throughout the day so i'm going to shut up now byeee i love you i'll send this when i get homeee <3

don't apologize oml

ALSO ARE YOU KIDDING ME IM GOING TO CRY LUCY THIS ACTUALLY MEANS SO MUCH TO ME you're not real

omg you wrote about us??? i would love love love to read it 🥹

you're right our first interaction literally was for my event which im so grateful for omg!!! cause we'd been moots for a while but i was very scared to interact w you but you engaged w my event and it made soooo happy

you're adorable and this right here made my whole day, i was feeling very sick in the morning and throughout the afternoon which HAS NOW DISAPPEARED SEEING ALL YOUR NOTIFS literally beaming w happiness rn

i love you so much, wayyy more than how much words can convey <333

[runningfrom2am]

Hi do you still write for obx I loved ur hunger games fic for rafeand then ur jj Jennifer bodies one and I can’t remember if your still finishing ur rafe one or ur jj one I remember you said you were going to do a part two to your jj fic but that was so long ago and I had to make a new tumblr 😭😭😭 so I don’t know if it’s still the same or not anyways I love ur obx fics sm also I hope this doesn’t seem Rude or mean

i would love to keep writing for them, but i lost the draft for the next part of the rafe hunger games one at 12k words so i’ve been VERY slowly rebuilding it. i’d really like to finish that one day.

jj x jennifer’s body au i’m not gonna do a part two of. i really wanted to try because people were hounding me about it but i think that story is better as is. same as the movie. i just couldn’t come up with a good direction to take it and i figured i wouldn’t beat a dead horse lol

i’ve been less motivated to write for obx for quite some time bc honestly the rafe fandom on tumblr has been kind of driving me up the wall. like,, love yall but the only thing anyone wants to read for him (and jj for that matter) is smut and that’s not what we do over here on runningfrom2am. i always got so many inbox messages or comments being like “um where’s the smut” and it was disheartening honestly so i’m just taking an extended break from them, but i’d love to come back to it one day bc those characters have such a special place in my heart.

[glitchyvoice]

Do you have any blorbos or ideas to share?

floodgates: open

yes!! i have a bunch of aus im working on though im assuming u mean cotl specific (the others are undertale/deltarune and homestuck related if theres any interest)

the main one im working on right now is fates twine, (which ill explain in more detail in a second) but i have two others. a pirate esque essentially dnd campaign au story which ive named tears in a bottle. im still figuring out designs for that one but nari is a critter the size of the lambs hand so thats funny. its called tears in a bottle cuz the lamb and the others in the pirate crew go to raid a lost city, and the statue in the middle of said city (which is of shamura. the bishops are all archfey in this au so theyre cool) is weeping golden tears into a bottle which contains nari. only the lamb can see these god tears and nari.

i also have ideas for a madoka magica x cotl au but i have no designs and not enough ideas to talk about it currently.

but then theres fates twine. fates twine ("fates twine binds the hearts of you and i" is the full name, fates twine is my shorthand) is a prequel au which starts when the old gods are still around, and out of the bishops only shamura has their crown. it explores what would happen if the lamb (who is named mara) found the red crown before nari could, and fought against their ascension. they actually meet nari when hes still a mortal because of this and they become friends. shenanigans ensue. (narinders name as a mortal here is paean. i thought it would be cool to link him to the demon he always becomes in game) i have a bunch planned and have like 4,000 words worth of scenes written for it. but they're all for different parts of the fic so it's not currently postable. the closest image i have for mara around the time they find the crown is this little sketch for a scene i made

they dont typically wear the crown they usually have it as a ring on their finger to hide they have it but for that scene they do.

this is a bit of an older design and artstyle but this is mara when theyre a bit older. this is. the only coloured drawing i have of them rn but im gonna work on more soon.

this is their current design at that age. the other lamb there is omen, their little sister. i have a whole page of doodles of her that im gonna post tomorrow probably. shes one of my favourite fates twine characters i love her sm lolol

and these are sketches of mara post them becoming a cult leader!! so yeah nari does still get the crown and ascend instead of them eventually and they become the last lamb and all that but its about the interesting things that them being the true god of death causes. so yeah. you also get one (1) paragraph draft snippet of the first chapter bc im feeling silly

so yeah!! yap over

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

This is just a thought but…. How do u think stsg would react to u getting into a fight? Maybe just idk… some creep who tried getting too close or some old ex friend that picked the fight first. :3 like no SERIOUS injuries more of a bloody nose + bruised knuckles kinda thing…. (forgive me 4 not being more dramatic I’m v v squeamish when it comes to violence) I feel like you’ve mentioned this before but idk my memory isn’t the best </3 like. I’m sort of imaging u come home a little later sorta roughed up and they’re just. Immediately like what the fuck?? I don’t see them as the type to go out and beat the person up (toru maybe…… /hj I think they’d both be tempted but that would just be a heat of the moment urge I think…) I’m gonna be honest the whole reason I even thought of this was for the idea of sugu tending to ur wounds… maybe scolding u a little for getting into a fight with someone… toru not smiling for once in his life and instead just. Kissing ur forehead trying not to let it show how pissed off he is (not at u ofc !!!). hehe idk this was just a little brain thing,,!! I hope ur doing well thoooo !! — stsg anon :>

STSG ANON THE LOMLLLL I’VE MISSED YOU 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 it’s been so long since you sent this i’m so sorry for the wait!!!! it got lost in my drafts and i only found it just now T_T

BUT AAAAA I’VE MISSED YOUR STSG THOUGHTS….. this scenario appeals to me soso much!!!!!!! AND DWWWW i’m a big ol sensitive baby when it comes to violence/gore so 😭😭 that’s perfect!!!! they would be so worried and so protective….. definitely pissed off too. like. the kind of anger that just boils under their skin yk?? i agree with you that they aren’t the type to instantly go the violent revenge route tho!!! their priority is just to make sure you’re okay :((( they’re absolutely seething w anger and just . twitching bc they’re so upset on your behalf LMAOO but i think they’d put it aside to care for you!!!!

and as always i agree w you completely <33 sugu is tending to your wounds and scolding you the slightest bit….. but i think he’d be a little too worried and guilty to really sound convincing. i just see sugu as being soooo empathetic :(((( he sees you all bruised up and it physically hurts him. he just wants you to be okay!!!! and then toru…. him not smiling and kissing your forehead instead <///3 he’s sooo so precious and so worried . i think he’d also feel a little ashamed!!! stsg are just sooo protective of you that i feel like they’d blame themselves for not being there yk?? :’3 so they make it up by being extra sweet. sniffle… i love them sm……

BUT honestly. when they’ve taken care of you properly and heard your explanation…… i think they get to Work 💀💀 NOW I DON’T. think. they’d get into a physical fight….. there’s a chance but it depends on the circumstance. at the very least they’re making their way over to whoever hurt you and making sure they Know you have two guard dogs protecting you <33333 they may or may not rough said person up too idk honestly. i just think they’d find it hard to control themselves around someone who Actually hurt you 😭😭 (if it’s a creep then they’re def Resorting to Violence but maybe not if it’s old friend...) they’re a littleeeeee scary but so sweet.

protective stsg my beloveds…. tysm for the good food stsg anon <3333 i rlly did miss you so much!! i hope you’re doing well!!!! and having a super lovely day or night :3 sending you lots of kissies + these stsg plushies…… they love you Very Much <33

[florence-is-gay]

hiii!!! im a fan of your work and was wondering of you could write some hcs of the mercs with an autistic s/o?? i struggle with autism and reading these things kinda helps. thx sm!!! :ooo

Absolutely!! I'm so glad you enjoy my headcanons, i haven't written any for quite a while lmao

--EDIT FROM YEARS LATER OML-- I had this sitting in my drafts completed with all mercs except for the last 3 listed, between procrastination and life and falling out of the fandom I guess I just eventually forgot... Once in a blue moon I'd come back to this post and think... "I'm sorry tomatosoopp... I will finish this for you one day. Maybe not now, or later, maybe not even soon... but... eventually. I promise." I hope things are going well for you, you've probably long forgotten your ask but I genuinely hope seeing this finally answered will bring you joy and make your day <3

I know it's late to say it, but Merry Christmas and Happy New year! Perhaps you can consider this as a long overdue gift, from me to you! I hope this year will bring you lots of wonderful and amazing things &lt;3 Love, Flo (P.S., I also added a bit to the shorter blurbs at the beginning... To make up for all that time! Now enjoy your long awaited post, my friend! <3)

SCOUT

Scout is pretty ADHD, and we all know how that's the peanut butter to his S/O's jelly. He gets excited with you about the things you love! And stims? Oh yeah. Leg bouncing, pen chewing, and the likes. So he won't judge you when you excitedly flap your hands or smack your thighs/any available surface. In fact, he'll share his fidgets with you when he notices you're feeling nervous or stressed. Sometimes he forgets you are extremely empathetic and sensitive to high energy or strong moods, so if he gets too excited or angry or anything of the sort he will do his best to calm himself as to not overwhelm or overstimulate you!

SNIPER

Sniper's not much of a talker, but he loves to listen to you ramble! Sometimes just the sound of your voice makes him smile! Also since he knows how tactile you are, he doesn't mind letting you feel his scars, tracing your fingers along and across them. He also lets you scritch his stubble, and he finds your reaction both amusing and adorable! Also, if you love nature, Sniper is your perfect guy! He'll take you for long walks in the woods or along hiking trails, not minding if you are slow or simply taking your time to stop and observe every little detail <3

ENGINEER

Engie loves all your little quirks!! He thinks you're the cutest darn thing on the planet! He'll definitely build you some fun fidgets and stimmy things! He also has earmuffs for when he's working with machinery, if you're feeling overstimulated he'll let you borrow them! Additionally, he enjoys relaxing with you by a fire just to chill out and play his instruments! He knows you have a fondness for music, so he tries to learn your favorite songs! He is also the type to always check on you to make sure you eat and drink <3

HEAVY

Like Sniper, Heavy isn't much for words. He doesn't mind silence, so he's perfectly okay with you zoning out, staring into space, or just lost in your thoughts. He also understands when you have a hard time wording things. He still struggles with English. And if you're feeling anxious or overwhelmed, he'll scoop you up in his big arms and hold you like a lil baby, and gently whisper words of praise and comfort. He'll also let you take naps in his arms <3 Like Engineer, he likes to make sure you don't skip meals. He doesn't always understand that some food textures are unpleasant, but he tries his best to find something you like!

DEMOMAN

Demo LOVES cuddles. He won't admit it to the other guys, but he finds it soothing. He knows you love to lay your head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat. He also gives great hugs! You told him once that you enjoy physical pressure on your body, so he'll give you extra-firm hugs, and sometimes he'll lay right on top of you to take a nap! He definitely will gift you some weighted blankets, along with some fun beanbags just to mess with. He also makes sure any touch on you is firm and grounding. Additionally, if you have a habit of sleeping a lot, it's no worry for this man! He's perfectly happy to pass out with you for 12+ hours and STILL have room for naps! As long as they are with you, he is happy <3

PYRO

Pyro themselves are nonverbal autistic, so honestly to them, you are the most normal person out there! They have hyperactive tendencies and struggle to pay attention to anything too long, but when it comes to you, you have their full attention! (To the best of their ability, anyway!) They will happily share their love for fire and cute things with you, though they also love when you share your hyperfixations with them! Not only that, but they will often bring you gifts relating to the things they know you love! Should you ever feel sad, touch-starved, or understimulated, just know Pyro will always be by your side to give you the best cuddles and hugs you could ask for!

MEDIC

If you are someone who is always psyched to learn new things, Medic is your perfect guy! He knows a lot about physical and psychological health, including autism! He will take time out of his day to educate you on your brain and why it works the way it does! He will do his absolute best to keep you informed so you can better understand yourself! (Even if at times you get tired of his lecturing) He also knows that you are very hands-on when it comes to many projects, so he will allow you to assist with simple tasks in his lab! He also knows you struggle with your health habits, aka hygiene, sleeping, eating, drinking, etc., so expect this man to be on your back! He wants to make sure you take good care of yourself <3

SPY

Spy is a bit of a tricky one. He seems completely unbothered by all of your quirks, almost to the point where you wonder if he even notices them. Rest assured, he certainly does! But he does his best not to bring attention to it unless you are the first to bring it up. He wants you to feel as though your autism doesn't define you, after all, you are more than your disability! At times he may challenge you to break from any bad or unhelpful habits, such as nail biting and pulling hair, or more serious matters like harmful stims when you get upset. Unrelated, he knows you are a person of the senses. So any gift to you is always a high-quality item: scented soaps and lovely colognes/perfumes, clothing that is soft and pleasant to touch, weighted blankets, and any type of small heavy object that may be grounding. Not to mention foods he knows you'll eat, since taste and texture can sometimes be an issue. Of course there is more, and if you don't like scented things and find soft textures on your body displeasing like some, he will accommodate for that as well! And lastly: Don't let him catch ANYONE making fun of you! They may not live to see the sun tomorrow.

SOLDIER

Honestly... He might also be autistic. No one knows for sure, but even if he was, he would loudly and proudly deny it. Loudly seems to be something the two of you do well-- you may find yourself struggling to control your volume in your excitement, but that's okay! He does too! Though he may also partly be hard of hearing from all of those rocket blasts... Regardless, the two of you seem to match each other's energy to near perfection- Yelling and screaming about nonsense, singing loud and off-key, even just making animal sounds or random noises incomparable to anything on this planet... Still he enjoys your company, neither of you really seem to be able to get a handle on social cues, but to heck with those! They're all confusing anyway! At least you understand each other! Additionally, the two of you may also struggle to remember things, especially short-term. But you're a good dynamic, always reminding each other what was forgotten! (...Just don't act surprised when he wants to recite to you the Declaration of Independence by heart for the 5th time that day.) And lastly, if you ever tell him you're autistic, surely he will tell you that you are American. And should you attempt to explain what autism is, more than likely he will assure you that you aren't (even if you clearly are-) and that you're perfect! He sees a lot of himself in you and he thinks you are the best thing since the birth of America <3