All of that right there.....above.....is something I wrote to my now ex as we were calmly discussing what happened between us and why I made the decision I did. And out of nowhere my mind goes in suuuuper deep and I came up with this metaphor to describe myself when it came to him. The more I go back and reread it the more it saddens me. And I feel depressed. Because it forces me to unintentionally think about my past relationships before him. And the fact this applies to AAAAALL my past relationships! This is how everyone treated me. I'm now believing that I was NOT cut out for the whole "so called love" thing because I see a pattern in all my relationships. Different faces, names, backgrounds childhood, life story and lifestyle....the end result once they became an adult remains the same. I was rejected by all of them regardless of how good I was to them. It wasn't enough, they were broken people. And acted like they didn't want the help to heal, they acted like they didn't want to get themselves right so they can be happy and enjoy life with me. So they ran. But I was the shiny new toy they didn't know how to take care of and handle properly. It's sad right?
It doesn’t matter who you are or what station in life you hold, there’s a pretty good chance you’ve felt the joy of finding love and the pain of losing it. Indeed, meeting someone new can be a great thing. It’s pretty exciting when the two of you hit it off right from the start. With a little luck, all of those good feelings could turn into love. Next, if you’re lucky, will come the whispering…
Separating our minds from our feelings is the hardest part. You have to accept that the person is not who you WANT them to be. #love #heal #healing #HealHealthy #movingon #moveon #losinglove #love #quote #quotes #relationships #true #truth #verytrue #meme #memes #quotesaboutlove https://www.instagram.com/p/CR1il5OJrBD/?utm_medium=tumblr
Tonight, I cried as much as I did that night. This time the pain was a little bit worse and a little bit different. Because I didn’t see you just yesterday. I didn’t tell you what I really wanted to say, and it is what it is I guess. But I loved you then and I love you still. I hope to see each other again if possible.
- When losing love you don't realise how desperate you've been trying to save it until you lose what could have only saved you the most. yourself. ---------------------------- Song recommendation: Fade away by Zack Hemsey • #zackhemsey #fadeaway #music #healing #artistsofig #poetsofinstagram #poetry #poems #suicide #gay #brokenheart #heartbroken #losinglove #sadness #feelingblue https://www.instagram.com/p/BosISBPgK4P/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=139uuw8x9wbkt
Never hand over your life for someone else to control. Once you lose your power, once you lose your control, you soon lose your happiness. You are no longer controlling your own life. You’re being controlled to provide happiness to those around you. They’ll start tearing you from your friends first. Soon after, you realize you don’t talk to your family as much. Before you know it...you are ALONE. You no longer wake up to your “best friend” in the morning. You wake up to the person in control of your happiness. Treat them right, keep them happy, care for them, support their crazy dreams. For what? To watch yours slip through your fingers. WE ALL HAVE ONLY ONE LIFE. STOP LIVING YOUR LIFE FOR OTHER PEOPLE. STOP HANDING OVER THE KEYS TO THE KINGDOM LIKE PAMPHLETS AT CHURCH. You have 1 life to get this right. Don’t prolong it. Don’t chance it. Don’t take it for granted.
Just steady your feet. Steady your feet and move on. That's all there's left to do. Keep your head up and walk straight...Just steady those feet and you'll be fine
I fought like hell to keep you, now the fighting hurts like hell, (coloringtheworldwithwords)
I started to work on a book, in which I draw all the BLACK TRUTHS. I process and recover some of my feelings cos I realized it is a good way to not go crazy. At least I hope so. I hope you will enjoy it, and I hope you feel you are not alone with your feelings, maybe you can gain something of it. It is a self therapy actually. I can feel it’s benefits. It is a good way to put down the burden and relieve the pain and it is a good way to recognize and identify feelings and situations.
Today, I broke down and wanted nothing more than to be in your arms once again. Knowing that you are moving forward with life, and do not want me to be any part of it, hurts. I am not sure if it was the feeling of hurt, or my soul simply died. You seemed so determined, so ready, so happy with the life excluding me. That was when I knew, I need to let go.