#look if you don't like criticism of your ship this post is NOT for you

[cosmicredcadet]

All this aroace character shipcourse has proven to me that a majority of people that interact in fandom cannot actually interact with characters and media outside of shipping and genuinely I believe you need to learn how to interact with media outside of shipping.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Since you've mentioned Scarlet Lady in one of your posts, what's your opinion on it?

I've mentioned before that I'm a big Scarlet Lady fan, which is the only reason that I'm comfortable answering asks like this one. I don't publicly criticize the content of hobby creators. That's wildly inappropriate! Punch up, not down.

The linked post was a general discussion of the adaptation process and how @zoe-oneesama did a fantastic job, so for this one, I'm just going to do some general gushing because I do actually like praising and enjoying things!

Scarlet Lady's chosen format (comic) allows it to have this wonderful conversation with canon where it can rely on the framework of canon to tell it's own story while also using canon for jokes and meta commentary. This means that Scarlet Lady is about as close as fan content can get to a direct reboot because it's able to have moments like this one from the comic's first post:

[Image description: Adrien standing in his room after transforming into Chat Noir for the first time. He is beaming and his eyes are shining with excitement as he exclaims, "This is gonna be awesome!"]

A single picture that communicates everything we need to know about Adrien getting his miraculous. When I've done this same thing in fanfic, I had to write out the full scene because that's how novels work. You have to give the full picture. With a comic, you can just quickly acknowledge this thing that we all already know and then move on to the new stuff. A picture really is worth a thousand words! (Or, in my case, more like two thousand...)

This allows Zoe to keep the same akumas that we get in canon without her story feeling like a boring rehash because she can focus on what's different in her version. A novelization of the same content would have to show both the stuff that stays the same and the stuff that changes for it to be coherent. That's a lot less fun to read and write. It's why I basically never revisit canon akumas in my own stuff. It's just too derivative for the written word.

This is one of the big reasons that I loved Scarlet Lady. Because it was able to have that more directly conversation with canon, it was able to take canon and say, "hey, why don't we embrace the tone that you established in season one and retell the story with that vibe?" That's something that I desperately wanted to see, but that is totally unsuited to my chosen artistic form. It couldn't be a novel. It had to be a comic.

If you want to know what a true formula show version of Miraculous would look like, Scarlet Lady is it. It does everything that Miraculous should have done:

Sticks to a lighthearted tone where nothing is ever super serious

Keeps Gabriel entirely unsympathetic

Has slow character development and background hints at a bigger plot as the only serial elements, allowing the individual episodes to be their own story while never feeling incomplete or rushed

Allows characters other than Marinette to shine while keeping Marinette as the clear main character

Makes Adrien narratively important

MAKES THE LOVE SQUARE CUTE SO I CAN ACTUALLY SHIP IT

Understands that Lila and Chloe can't coexist as antagonists

Reverses the love square, which is the best way to tell their story. Yes, I will die on my "love diamond" hill. It's a good hill. Come join me. I'll bring cookies.

I could keep going, but you hopefully get my point. While Scarlet Lady is certainly not the only way to do a formula version of canon, it's proof that a formula version does work! You don't have to go the serious route for Miraculous to be successful.

I want to take some time to gush about the ending, but I don't want to spoil it, so I'll put that gushing under a "read more" in case anyone hasn't seen it. I'll finish out this less spoilerish section with this:

I feel like some people are surprised when they learn that I love Scarlet Lady because - as some of you have probably picked up - it is quite different from my ideal version of canon. I'm not sure why that would stop me from enjoying a thing, though. It's important to remember that our personal ideals are not the only way to tell a good story. There are lots of ways to take what canon gave us and make something wonderful! It's part of the reason that I enjoy being in a fandom.

If I only wanted to see my ideal take on canon, then I'd stick to writing/imagining my own stories. But I don't want that! I like seeing alternate takes, too. Scarlet Lady is one of my personal favorites. It's completely different from anything that I'd ever think to write and that's why I'm so glad that it exists! I like being entertained just as much as I like creating my own entertainment and I don't want to only read stories that look like something I'd write. That's boring!

Spoilers below:

I've mentioned before that there are many, many ways to properly handle Chloe's character and Zoe did such a good job with her take on that! Chloe isn't absolved of all the things she did wrong, but she's also treated as a young woman with the ability to change.

While the comic bares the name of Chloe's alter ego, she was the never the main character. She never went on a journey. The story kept her to her shallow season-one self: a petty brat who just wanted attention. It did this because that's who Chloe was in canon and who Chloe needed to be for the comic to work.

The first time we see any complexity from Chloe is in the comic's final few episodes, which was absolutely the right call for Zoe to make! In a recent post, I talked about how the end of a formula show is the only time when you can break the formula in catastrophic ways and that's what Zoe did. She kept Chloe static until it was time to end the story and that's when the formula breaks. That's when Chloe gets depth because, once she has depth, the formula doesn't work.

That depth is not used to redeem Chloe, but to show us that there's hope for Chloe. That this petty brat who we've been dealing with has some serious issues and needs help. Help that she's going to get far away from the people that she's hurt because her issues aren't an excuse for what she's done. They don't erase the harm that she caused. At the same time, understanding her issues makes us hope that she can be better now and Scarlet Lady took a moment to give us that hope. To show us the START of Chloe's true story.

That is the kind of ending that I have wanted to see in so many properties!!! It was so wonderful to finally get one that did this right. A story that understood that full redemption to the team and damnation to death/suffering are extremes on a scale of possibilities. You don't have to go to extremes! You can fall in the middle and the middle is a perfect, natural place for Chloe to land in this kind of story. Fully redeeming or even fully damning Chloe simply doesn't work in lighthearted formula content. It's too big a lift as canon has already demonstrated.

I also loved Zoe's take on Emilie. I've mentioned that I don't like evil Emilie in part because it makes her revival feel like the start of a new story. She's back and she'd bad, so we have to take her down now! But I don't want that. I want the story to end when Gabriel is stopped. Zoe does this by giving us an Emilie that is another perfect middle ground. She matches canon's uncomfortable implications without feeling like a true villain who is a threat to society.

[stromblessed]

jayvik shippers need to understand that non-jayvik shippers are annoyed with you not because of not shipping jayvik, but because there is no escaping you.

you clog every tag on every social media platform. want to look at caitvi? jayvik posts tagged as caitvi for some reason. want to look at viktor posts? jayvik. jayce posts? jayvik. want to look at mel posts? jayvik. anyone talking about mel and viktor in the same sentence is obviously secretly talking about jayvik. (and by the way here's why every mel scene is secretly about jayvik and every viktor scene is secretly about how all he thinks about is jayce and why mel is inferior and jayce was a good boy and was right all along). you dominate the discourse and don't give room for criticism of jayce or viktor's writing and don't tolerate other interpretations. every theme in the show was about jayvik all along.

on my main blog, i write fic and make arcane posts - not complaining, staying in my lane, making my own content for me and my friends - and my tags, comments, and replies are full of people talking about jayvik and asking about jayvik when the ship is not tagged or present in my posts or fics, and jayce usually isn't even tagged because i just don't have fun with him as a character right now, and all people want to talk about or comment on is him or jayvik. so here i am, venting on my sideblog

this is a curse i specifically bear and cannot escape because as a fan of the writing of these aforementioned characters SEPARATELY, any and every algorithm is gonna shovel piles of jayvik posts 10 feet deep right up against my front door, and everyone on tumblr is "tagging for visibility" or whatever so there's no escaping it here either. blocking and muting does not help because either jayvik isn't always tagged, or jayvik is tagged at random and i end up hiding swathes of posts i actually do want to see. and there is also the fact that i WOULD be into jayvik because i do think it's fun, i WOULD have more fun discussing jayce specifically as a character who i think is a very fun hot mess, if social media wasn't making me despise both with a burning passion right now, which sucks

the only haven is Ao3 because people are still slightly sane when tagging their fics - at least with the relationship tags. jayvik shippers you do need to stop tagging mel though along with any other character who doesn't affect the plot of your story and i am dead serious

this is a vent post but i am also declaring - the reason why people are frustrated and annoyed at jayvik at large, as a concept, even if you yourself are a chill shipper and you don't see why we all can't just get along, is because the collective has poisoned the well and it's not fun for other people to be in the same space as you right now. there are a lot of you - be glad of that and happy, not every fandom let alone ship gets this large and energetic a following - but don't be surprised that people like me are gonna be mad because. it is irritating. and you're everywhere. and unfortunately there's nothing that any one person can do about it. it is an environmental thing and you just. need to come to terms and be aware, idk

[ot3]

Just curious, what’s your opinions on Kristoph and Phoenix? I see you reblog ship posts about them sometimes and I’m really curious about your opinions on their dynamic both inside and outside of ship stuff, because I didn’t really know how to interpret Kristoph in particular. I think he’s one of the worse villains in AA tbh, it’s been a while so I may be misremembering, but I just didn’t… get that much substance from him?

kristoph is certainly a really hard character for me to fully develop an opinion on in isolation. i think the only area where i'm capable of saying anything about him i can back up with significant references to the text is in regard to his relationship with phoenix, because that's where the meat of his character interactions are. and more broadly because as a #phoenixhead my primary means of looking at the entire franchise is how things relate to phoenix. if you'd like to read about my interpretation of phoenix and kristoph's relationship more specifically i've got a post on that subject here. i think it's a character dynamic that has a TON going for it relative to the screentime if you're able to disregard fanon and look directly at what's in the text.

but more on kristoph individually

kristoph suffers from the same thing that all of aa4's major characters and plotlines do: not getting another game. there was clearly more to the gavin brothers' story we didn't get and will never get, and knowing that there's Something there we have absolutely no means of predicting or unraveling makes it hard to theorize. he kind of exists in a quantum state for me where i can see a ton of alternate perspectives on his character's complexities and just buy whichever one i'm feeling at a given moment. i personally wouldn't say he lacks substance because every interaction he has with any other character is, imo, very compelling and gives me a lot to chew on. but he's a character that's all questions and no real conclusions for sure.

i don't think he's a cackling machiavellian serial abuser. i think hes easily the kind of person who has the capacity to be emotionally abusive and manipulative to the people closest to him without being Pure Evil. because we have so little on him it's very easy to portray kristoph as the kind of sinister that provides whatever OP's favorite flavor of angst is. and i'm certainly no exception to that; i just happen to be a person who is into maybe some subtler flavors.

he's both one of ace attorney's most calculated villains, with poisoning vera's nailpolish being an incredibly cold maneuver that suggests a lot of foresight, and one of ace attorney's most brutal murderers, capable of getting aggressive enough in a moment to bludgeon a man to death with a bottle. i think kristoph can be understood as a character whose primary motivation is control, both over himself and others. there's that critical line in turnabout succession where he tells klavier he's out of control, and klavier says "whos control? mine, or yours?" his reputation is built on his ability to stay calm under pressure, and his ability to stay calm under pressure is built on his tendencies to preemptively engineer situations in his favor. the stuff with phoenix and the gramarye case represents what we can presume to be the biggest failure of his career.

i think this puts him very much in line with AA1's main villains. people like to compare him to dahlia a lot for obvious reasons and there's some fun to be had there but i think it lets people overlook how well he ties into AA1. redd white controlled the press and controlled the judges to get away with his blackmail ring. von karma controlled the witnesses to engineer his perfect cases. damon gant controlled the police and the evidence, and then controlled lana to control the prosecution. although those were all one-case villains i think kristoph justifies his larger scope in aa4 by the significant and longstanding personal connections he has to the rest of the main cast. kristoph represents the mirror image of those AA1 villains; aa1 shows the way the deck is stacked against the defense. kristoph shows what it looks like when someone tries to stack it in the other direction

i think kristoph plays an important part in the larger franchise by showing what corruption looks like from the defense's bench, and how this corruption takes a different cadence when it lacks the systemic power that the villains like gant had. i think his cold, calculated approach to defense works well as a foil to the type of defending we saw from phoenix who is all heart and charges in head first. i think apollo works well representing a sort of compromise between the two, being a little bit shrewder than phoenix but no less earnest. i think klavier, then, as a prosecutor who is much less aggressive than the previous 3 both personally and professional serves to further invert the expectations set by the trilogy in a way that's really satisfying.

is kristoph missing some pretty critical backstory that i would love to see? yeah. absolutely. but i think when you look at him as a story device rather than an underdeveloped character he adds a tonnnnn to the series. that said, i will die wondering.

[thewertsearch]

Alright, that’s barely wind-themed, and you know it.

John's powers have been getting awfully abstract lately. It almost feels like he's cutting out the air-flavored middleman, and simply charging this ship with the idea of Breath.

Back in my Aspect theory post, I postulated that Breath could represent a conceptual space that includes direction, destination and transportation. Perhaps, then, John is imbuing the ship with the raw concept of being a vehicle, allowing it to continue functioning as one without fuel.

You give your wallet to your loyal chauffeur familiar. He looks puzzled. You inform the party that you will not be going on this journey. You must remain behind and continue looking for your father. But you insist their mission is the most critical of all! You know they can handle it. You believe in them.

At this rate, I'm not even sure the Tumor is getting to Derse. WV's still destined to be Exiled, which means there's a decent chance he'll be ambushed by one of the Midnight Crew's competent members.

At least this means Jack won't be looting the wallet from John's corpse, as I previously theorized.

GG: john!!! i am worried about rose! GG: im pretty sure she is on her way there to look for jack! […] GG: also, um… GG: i guess you probably still dont know about your dad yet do you?

Fun's over.

I think this is going to hit John hard. He's been no-selling Sburb's emotional toll since back in Act 1, but I don't think even he could bottle up grief like this. This might hit him even harder than Rose.

And that’s saying something.

[blitzwhore]

I just saw Blitzø get called Stolas stockholm victim I can't with this fandom anymore😭

😂 As outrageously incorrect and stupid as that take is, I'm going to go on a tangent here. I hope you don't mind.

I think every fandom has annoying people with awfully terrible takes in it. People with zero media literacy. People who hatewatch. People who think they're entitled to the exact show they would've wanted, which has nothing to do with the actual, existing show.

This is especially true for queer media, and especially true for queer cartoons. (Hi, yes. I was active in the Adventure Time, Steven Universe, Voltron, and She-Ra fandoms when those shows were airing, respectively. I've seen some stuff). Some people just can't handle queer cartoons, period. If the queer characters/ships are soft and wholesome, they're infantilising and boring, and if they're complex and nuanced and actually have conflict, they're abusive and problematic. You'll hear the same recycled arguments over and over again. Like, the shit some people are saying about Blitz and Stolas after The Full Moon? Is literally almost word-for-word what they said about Catra and Adora post-season 3 of She-Ra (and even at the end of the show).

Here's the thing, though! Those people and their bad takes are not what I want to think about what I think about a fandom. Those aren't the people I want to call the fans. They don't deserve that title. Not when so many other people are out there dedicating their time to making gifs and art and meta posts, and writing fic, and commenting/reblogging to show support, and sliding into people's DMs to scream and squee together about a thing they love.

At the end of the day, "fandom" is just a lot of people each doing their own thing. Which people you engage with and allow to stay within your line of sight will determine your fandom experience. Fandom can be a huge, convoluted, online space full of people who are constantly arguing with one another and whose takes make you unfathomably angry... Or it can be you and your 5 friends and mutuals who scream gleefully at one another in 2-note posts. You can't control what others post online, but you can control your engagement with it.

How? Well, here's what I personally do to avoid getting upset by people's stupid opinions online:

Filter 'critical' and 'anti' tags (eg. #anti stolitz #anti vivziepop #Helluva Boss critical #HB critical #vivziepop critical). Many people actually do tag their critical posts because they know it's the respectful thing to do!

If I come across a post that has one or more of those tags, obviously, I don't click through to see it under any circumstances.

If I stumble across a stranger's untagged post with hate/criticism that upsets me: I stop reading and BLOCK. Immediately. I don't look back. I don't finish reading. I don't engage. I just block block block. I <3 the block button, seriously.

If I feel my mind reeling from a bad take I just came across: I take a step back, close my phone, breathe, remember life is beautiful sometimes. Go back and watch an episode I really like. Clean my living space a little. Vent about it to a friend (but only if I really need to, because if not, I'd rather not dwell on it).

If I'm starting to feel the need to reply to someone's bad take (directly or via my own post), I instead make the decision to channel that energy into making fandom posts out of love. (I don't do this just with fandom. If I see something transphobic online, I usually react by reblogging a bunch of trans art or trans positivity posts on my main, for example). I like to think of it as putting some positivity out into the world to compensate for the negativity I just saw. So, for example, if I see someone shitting on my blorbo, I may make a silly post just saying how much I love blorbo. Or I'll make (or draft) a post about how interesting I find some of blorbo's actions. Or reblog another person's positive/interesting post about blorbo.

And finally, I stay the hell away from Twitter. Or at least, if I go on Twitter, I try my best to avoid any tweet that has text in it instead of just art. Even the people who have good opinions spend too much time arguing with the people who have bad opinions on there. I don't want to see people's bad takes! No, not even while reading founded and perfectly articulated criticism of those bad takes! So I just limit my time on Twitter. And again, if someone is putting bad takes on my TL (even if it is to counter them), I unfollow and block as needed.

All this to say, yes, it really fucking sucks to read the opinions of people who don't understand and who hate the characters and ships and worlds you love. Gosh it's the worst. But you can curate your fandom experience. You can focus on the things you can control. You have the power to decide if your fandom experience is draining or fun!

And because I don't know how to finish this, here, have a Stolitz kiss to heal you:

We will keep winning and there's nothing the haters can do about it. 😌

[zosan-secondchances]

The Pirate King of the North: Part 8

Main Themes: Villain Sanji, Alternate Universe, Zosan Ship

Warning: Long post ahead with One Piece spoilers. Contains strong language and explicit content.

Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9

Sanji

Explain, Commander.

Commander 2

We’d been keeping tabs on Doflamingo like you wanted. But since your… performance… in Sabaody Archipelago, he’s disappeared from our radar completely.

Law didn't look too impressed hearing this. 

Law

You've known where to find him all along?

Sanji

Of course I do. Or…I did.

Oh, don't give me that face, doctor. Remember, Doffy and I have an alliance. I only wanted to make sure that he doesn't know that I'm sneaking around with you until we find out more about Corazon. My intel on his whereabouts all but benefits you. However, please understand that it's all on a need-to-know basis. I still have a duty to protect his privacy.

The doctor glares at him, sneering especially after being reminded about the blonde's partnership with his sworn enemy. He's starting to have doubts about saving the man's life.

Zoro begins to wonder himself what this means about the recent development in his relationship with the blonde.

Sanji turns his attention back to the blue-haired commander.

Sanji

So there's nothing at all? Nothing in the usual countries and islands? …At home even? Are any of our agents compromised?

Commander 2

I have in good faith that the reports are accurate and untapped.

And… I really hope he’s not wandering somewhere in the castle. I don’t know if I can sleep like that.

Zoro crosses his arms and legs at the foot of Sanji’s bed, listening intently and observing the stranger. He notices that the blonde's relationship is somewhat domestic with this man, even with the formal titles. 

Sanji

Hold on. How in the world did you find me?

Commander 2 pokes the side of his head.

Commander 2

Distress signal. Did you die?

Sanji

Uhm… no?

Law

He did.

Zoro looks at the doctor with a horrified expression but Sanji and the commander look unbothered by the news. Law picks up on the swordsman's concern so he follows up quickly. 

Law

Relax. He's still alive, isn't he? We lost him for less than a minute. His heart stopped beating but we got it under control.

Commander 2

That would do it.

Sanji groans, his head falling back against the pillow that's propping him up.

Sanji

I forgot about that damned thing. The last time this happened was when the Marimo sliced off my arm.

Zoro frowns at the memory.

Zoro

You… died then?

Sanji

So I've been told. I only remember feeling like shit. They told me that I bled out from the fight, love. You got me good!

Zoro frowns at the comment as Sanji chuckles casually about it. To him, it’s starting to make sense how the blonde was able to slip away and survive certain arduous battles against him before.

While he can't see the commander's eyes, he could sense that the man is watching him like a hawk behind his thick goggles. Zoro returns the glare with just as much intensity.

Sanji

I think the signal still activates if we hit a critical condition.

Commander 2

Which wouldn’t have happened if you had your Raid Su–

Sanji

DON'T. Start.

The commander closes his mouth shut and tuts to himself, resisting to openly show any signs of disapproval in front of everyone. 

Law

Mr. Prince-ya, is there something you want to tell us? We can't have a tracker on you while we're trying to stay under the radar ourselves.

Sanji and his commander share a look. After a brief pause, the blonde speaks.

Sanji

It's a bit complicated, doctor.

Commander, it’s okay to tell them. We need to prove that they can trust us, and that hasn’t changed. Even if the doctor and dear Doffy are enemies.

Commander 2

Fine. I hate that guy too anyway.

Law smirks at the commander’s comment. Sanji can't say that he's not glad to see that they have found common ground at the very least.

The commander turns his attention to Law, then proceeds to explain.

Commander 2

It's Germa tech–a safety precaution, nothing more. The signal isn't something that can be intercepted by anything, including black snails. It can only be sent and received by people who have undergone the procedure to install the proper modifications, and it’s tied to our genetics.

Sanji

Our father had kindly ordered his scientists to open up our skulls when we were very young. It made sense at the time, what with softer heads and faster recovery rate. It’s useful, but we have no control of it.

The blue-haired man nods then follows up quickly.

Commander 2

It's similar to an automatic reflex.

Now that we’ve matured, I believe it will prove fatal to have the mods removed. We can’t do anything about it.

Zoro felt sick at the thought. He wonders what sort of monster Sanji had been raised by. Then he realises something. 

Zoro

Curls… are you two brothers?

Sanji stares at him for a second, then laughs out loud, making him and Law look at each other in confusion.

Sanji

Yes! I forget that I haven’t told you anything about my family!

Marimo and doctor, this is my brother, Asshole. Asshole, this is Marimo and doctor.

The commander snarls at Sanji, gritting his teeth.

Commander 2

My name is Vinsmoke Niji, Prince and Commander of Germa.

—

Zoro was selfishly hoping to continue spending time with the recently woken up blonde but this prince commander, Niji, had completely taken over Sanji's time. The swordsman didn't fully understand the conversation that followed but it was a necessary one as it involved the blonde's health.

Niji had provided Law with what looks like a compact first aid kit specifically tailored for the Pirate King. He went on a detailed explanation about how their bodies differ from regular human bodies, pointing out that Sanji, while being one of the Vinsmoke children that had been modified to have superhuman capabilities, is especially unique compared to the rest of his siblings having the only one who retained his emotions.

Hearing the science behind it felt clinical and too much information for the swordsman to fully absorb. He felt like being in the room while Law and the commander spoke about Sanji's body the way they did was too personal and he shouldn't be there for it.

When Zoro tries to leave, he feels a hand wrap around his own. He looks down and finds that the blonde is holding onto him, as if asking him to stay. So he does.

To conclude, Niji proceeds to go through the contents of the kit. One of which is a tubed cream that he demonstrates with. He applies a small amount on the blonde's ripped tendons, miraculously sealing the open wound closed in an instant.

Sanji looked satisfied with the result. He wriggles and stretches his feet poking out of the blanket, smiling at it happily. Now there are scars where the gashes once were, adding to his ever growing collection. Niji's face looks unfazed, but he straightens up and puffs out his chest a bit like he's proud of his work.

To ensure Law's continued interest in working together, Sanji provides him with even more valuable information about himself and his kingdom, offering them as gifts in good faith. He reveals that his four most trusted commanders are actually his siblings, and should anything happen to him, one of them will take over to rule Germa. Their collective efforts ensure that the Pirate King’s reputation is upheld and his orders are enforced by each one of their varying specialties. It gives the illusion that the Sanji is in multiple places at once, and makes sure that his influence and power over the North remain unchallengeable.

Law

Why are you telling me all this?

Sanji

My dear, you haven't played this game much before, have you? I'm laying it all out for you. Don't waste it.

Niji

So you can use the information against him if he's being a dick. He's offering his trust to you for yours.

Maybe sharing a bit too much detail, if you ask me. A lot of people have lost their lives trying to learn what you just did in the last five minutes.

Sanji

Commander Niji, you ass! Let him figure it out! How else is he going to learn?

Niji

He's not a player. Look at him.

He's too soft.

Law

Sh–shut up! I'm not!

So, is this how you hide your whereabouts? By overwhelming everyone with information that is all technically true?

Sanji nods, smiling. He looks almost smug at his own cleverness.

Sanji

Carefully curated truth, doctor. I don't reveal everything, but I give away enough to keep people off my back, or you know, just for fun. I do prefer to work in the shadows.

Law

The Underworld?

Sanji

For the most part. If you're nice, I'll tell you more about it all later.

Sanji gives Law a cheeky flirtatious wink. Zoro rolls his eye in reaction.

Niji

This doesn't explain why you blew your own cover in Sabaody Archipelago with that charity show.

Sanji

Oh, it was all part of a heist but I’ve always wanted to show off my legs in those video shows. I completely didn't see the Celestial Dragon coming and I know that I should have known better. How hot did I look in those heels though?

Niji

Ugh….

Zoro quietly agreed about Sanji's appearance but he's not about to announce that.

Law

There's something I don't get….

Sanji

Ask away.

Law

I come from the North Blue myself. The Marines say that after you killed your own father, you enslaved your siblings, and they are never seen again.

Sanji

Ah.

Law observes Niji's features, taking notes of his curly eyebrows and similar facial structure.

Law

If what you say is true and this man is your brother, then the story from the Marines is false.

Sanji

Bunch of liars, those lot. They're worse than me.

Law

What's the real story?

Sanji glances at Niji then proceeds to explain. This time, his pace is slow, as if trying to make sure that he says the right word every time.

Sanji

Vinsmoke Judge was… there's no way around it–he’s an ass.

Niji

You can't deny all the scientific and military progress he'd made though.

Sanji

Yes, well…thank you, Commander.

Let's just say that I wasn't exactly his favourite. See, that, I could deal with.

But I killed him because he wouldn't let me visit our own mother's grave.

Zoro raised his eyebrows at that. He could tell that the doctor is intrigued by the story himself.

Sanji

I did force my siblings into custody at that time, but I only kept them under lock and key until I named myself ruler of Germa. Then I didn't need to.

Niji and my other siblings are hardwired to follow Germa’s current king or queen's demands so I made them my commanders. They didn't have to like it, but their loyalty is unquestionably clear. They physically can't disobey my orders. All thanks to dear father's hard work turning them into the perfect soldiers.

A lot of our father's faithful followers are against me being in the throne so to protect them, we had to hide their identities for a while. I guess it stuck.

Law

Figures your own father saw you as a threat.

Sanji

No…it's the opposite, actually. He locked me away when we were very young. He said I was uhm…

Sanji trails off at that and looks down. His grip on Zoro's hand tightens.

Niji

A failure. The word you're looking for is “failure”.

Sanji

Yeeees, yes. Thank you, Commander. Ah yes, how could I forget?

Niji 

Don't mention it.

Niji is smirking with a broad grin.

Sanji's body trembles in anger for a moment, but it subsides when Zoro gives his hand a reassuring squeeze. He takes a deep breath then turns to Law again after composing himself.

Sanji

He kept me out of sight, to make sure that I didn't ruin his reputation. Until one day he didn't feel just as merciful and threw me away.

Which brings us to the topic of Doffy…. I know you've seen my mark by now. You must wonder why I'm closely allied with a Celestial Dragon–another slaver, for that matter.

Law leans against the far door, crossing his arms.

Law

On the contrary... I don't think Celestial Dragons are all bad. Doflamingo is a special case though.

Sanji

Hah! You can say that again.

Are you aware of his SMILE factory?

Law

All too well.

Sanji

Right. The entire span of its outer walls are lined with Seastones. I needed a steady supply of it and I knew Doffy had his sources.

The stone's unusual properties allow my siblings to feel emotions but they're… heavy and awkward. And with all the combat my brothers and sister go through on the regular…

Law

You constantly need them for maintenance… and Doflamingo is milking your every worth.

Sanji nods affirmingly.

Sanji

I need pure condensed ones to make something more compact and permanent but they're extremely rare. I'm not even sure if that Celestial Dragon in Sabaody knew what they were. We've been gathering everything we can find for years, and finally we may have enough after Sabaody.

Doffy said he'd help with the supply of the regular ones while I go find them but he's proven to be… demanding.

Niji

Demanding is an understatement. Also, he's a fuckin’ pervert.

Sanji

Hey, he's my fuckin’ pervert.

Zoro

Curls…

Sanji

Ah, shit. I'm sorry, love. This is going to take some getting used to….

Law

But the other Vinsmokes are already hardwired to obey your commands. That doesn't make sense. Why would you change that and give them emotions? Everything about it benefits you.

Sanji remains quiet. Law speaks after the sudden realisation.

Law

…Because that's not what you want.

Sanji

You're getting it now….

Law

You want them to have a choice.

You want to give them the freedom of will….

Law eyes the helmet tucked under Niji's arm.

Law

Why aren't you wearing it then? I assume it works whenever you put it on. This means you can choose to abandon your Pirate King anytime.

Niji

A tempting idea. Not that I already didn't think about it.

Law

You… choose to stay? You choose to wear it whenever you want, and you decide to stay by his side?

Niji shrugs, his mouth curls a scowl.

Niji

Don't put it like that. You make it sound gross.

I wear it to gain empathy. My brothers and sister wear it for their own reasons. It gives us better judgement when we need to make critical decisions.

Sanji

And Germa thrives for it–thanks to those decisions.

Niji doesn't look him in the eye, but that way he puffs his chest when he's proud of himself happens again very slightly.

Sanji

The helmet's not the prettiest. And it's heavy. They don't have a good quality of life dragging it around, being stuck with it.

Once this is over, I'll take all the condensed Seastones that we have see what we can make of it.

Speaking of, Marimo…please tell me you have them.

They all turn to the swordsman, who procures the bag that Sanji had given him from under his sleeve. The blonde sighs with relief at the sight and takes it, holding the bag close to his chest.

Sanji

Thank you…

Zoro nods in acknowledgement as Sanji secures the bag away in one of the drawers of the end tables next to his bed.

Law

Mr. Prince-ya…

Sanji

Yes...?

Law

You're… surprisingly... not unkind.

Sanji blushes up to his ear. He pulls his blanket up to cover his face.

Sanji

Yeah, well…what good does that do if they're stuck with those ugly things?

Zoro grabs the blonde's hand that's gripping the blanket and pulls it down. He smiles at him with a softened look in his eye, feeling touched by the story.

Zoro

So you are a decent man after all.

Sanji

NO–!

The blonde swings a leg and hits the swordsman at the back of his head. The momentum sends him to fall face first on the tiled floor. Zoro gets up with a furious expression on his face, a tear in his eye and a couple of large bumps on his head.

Zoro

WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! I WAS TRYING TO PAY YOU A COMPLIMENT!!!

Sanji gets on his feet, blanket dropping to the floor and begins yelling back while in full nude. A drip of blood flow down his nose.

Sanji

YOU CAN'T SAY SHIT LIKE THAT, YOU BASTARD!!

Zoro

WHY DIDN'T YOU HIT TRAFFY TOO?! HE STARTED IT!!!

Law

Don't bring me into this….

Niji

Tch.

Sanji

And what are you tutting about?!

Niji averts his gaze with an unimpressed frown on his face.

Niji

I just find it ironic that the person you decide to be with is a brute with green hair.

Sanji glares at him with a growl at the back of his throat. He stomps towards him, looking like he's about to throw a punch.

Zoro quickly gets up and hoists the naked blonde into his arms.

Sanji

Oi!

Zoro

Don't even think about it. Your feet are fine now but your heart isn't.

Sanji mimics Zoro's last line in a high pitched, mocking voice. The swordsman lays him gently back on his bed, ruffles his hair then proceeds to pick up the blanket to lay it over the blonde after dusting it off.

Niji watches the interaction between the two carefully. He notices their closeness and how they can't seem to let go of each other's hands again when Sanji finally settles in.

The commander reaches under his arm and with one smooth swing, he equips the heavy metal helmet over his head with a ding, covering the entirety of his face but the eyes behind his goggles.

Sanji's eyes widen in horror.

Sanji

That can't be good.

Commander, what are you up to?

Niji keeps his hands on his helmet, staying silent as he's processing information in his head.

Law notices a glint of his eyes behind the lens of his goggles. He thought that he saw a hint of concern on his face but it went as quickly as it came.

The blue-haired commander finally slides his hands off his headwear as he turns to face Sanji. The way he scrunches his face tells the blonde that he's grinning wide behind the metal plate that covered his lower face.

Niji

I think I'll stay, Your Highness.

Sanji

NO.

Zoro and Law

What?!

Niji

Due to recent events, I have come to the conclusion that the best course of action to ensure Our Majesty's survival is to remain at his side for the duration of his trip. At least until you reach Skypiea anyway.

Sanji

FUCK OFF, NIJI!

Law

I don't get a say in this, do I?

Zoro

Calm down, Curls. This isn't good for your heart.

Sanji

He's not good to my heart.

Take it off and go home, Niji.

Niji

Hmm… nah.

Sanji

Nah?!

Niji

You always did say we need to bond more like a proper family.

Niji opens his arms, as if challenging the blonde. Then he speaks mockingly.

Niji

Let's bond, brother.

—

Niji 

What the hell is this?

Sanji has dragged Niji all the way to their shared bunk room where mountains of laundry are scattered throughout the floor, waiting to be folded. Zoro is trying his best not to snicker behind them while the blue-haired man stood still, too stunned at the sight.

Sanji

Bonding. This is bonding.

Niji

This is not–

The blonde pushes the blue-haired man into the room.

Sanji

If you're going to stay here, you have to make yourself useful.

Niji

This is servant stuff!

Sanji hurdles over a couple of piles to get to their wardrobe. When he does, he strips off his borrowed hospital gown and starts putting on his casual wear.

Sanji

Yes, you're right. And I hate to break it to you but… you are one.

Niji

I'm a prince!

Sanji smirks as he pats himself down, satisfied with his choice of clothing.

Sanji

And I'm a king and yet, here we are. Stay here, and get some headway.

Keep Penguin's stuff close to the door in case he runs in looking for clothes post-shower again, otherwise everything else gets wet. It's the one with the penguin doodle on the inside collar. Shachi’s ones have shorter sleeves than the rest. Ikkaku’s has a smaller cut overall but sometimes I get it mixed up with Hakugan’s….

To Zoro's amusement, Sanji goes on a long list of do’s and don'ts for each and every one of the Heart Pirates clothes, overwhelming the blue-haired commander.

Niji 

This is bullshit. You're just making this up. There's no way you remember that for all twenty of them.

Zoro

No, he's actually pretty spot on. Also, there's twenty-one. Law's too shy to ask so he sneaks in his stuff in the middle of the night. It should be around here somewhere….

Sanji

Watch the feathers on one of his coats! Don't ruffle it up or it will lose its natural shape.

Let's go, Marimo.

Niji

Wait–where are you going?

Sanji quickly grabs Zoro's hand and rushes out the door.

Sanji

Uh–king business! Very busy. Don't follow!

Niji

Fuckin’ hell, San–

The door slams close behind them.

Little did Zoro know that he was about to have the best sex of his life.

—

Thanks to the collective power and experience of the passengers aboard the Polar Tang, the Heart Pirates and their guests are an unstoppable force. They travelled through the Grand Line and covered almost half of the world in the matter of weeks as opposed to years. They dove deep underwater for any potential threat that they wanted to avoid, and having Niji onboard meant that they had eyes and a driving force in the skies whenever they needed it.

There were a couple of reports from the blue-haired commander that Law had stowed away in his memory banks to worry about later. The first one being the sighting of Kaidou’s forces nearby. He wonders what business they possibly could have all the way in the Grand Line.

Secondly, something has upset the merfolk. Whatever it is, Niji reported that fleets of Prince Fukaboshi’s army can be seen on the move from afar. Law makes an effort to keep their sub at a distance so as to not get caught up in their affairs.

The doctor also noticed that the blonde especially took interest in the latter, asking if there's a sighting of the mermaid prince himself but his brother came back without good news for him.

—

They reach the boundaries of the island Jaya at high noon. The Pirate King insists not to step foot inside its village of Mock Town as Doflamingo is known to have men in the area. As per agreement of their alliance, Sanji is not allowed to send his own men or any one of his associates in his territory unless the tall Warlord is notified in advance. Naturally, the blonde didn't care much about it and tells everyone that they can get on the island if they want as long as they don't get seen.

With that information, Law decides to skirt the ship around and dock at the other more isolated side of the island, away from prying eyes, in the boundaries of South Grove.

Once settled, they stretch their legs and sunbathe on the deck for a while until Law orders his men to forage in the forest or fish in the waters to stock up ahead on food, warning them to stay away from the town that Sanji had mentioned earlier.

Law

And try not to show up in the news this time, will you?

Law singles out Sanji, looming over him as the blonde relaxed on his sun lounge chair in his swim trunks. Zoro is laid on the floor beside him.

Sanji

Don't tempt me, Traffy-kun.

Law

It's “Trafalgar.”

Zoro

Traffy, can you stop telling him what to do? This is how it started last time.

Niji

So you're to blame for that, huh?

Law

ACK–

The Heart Pirates all boo in unison, telling off their own captain–all demanding to be left alone, including their favourite Chore Boy, accusing him of overworking everyone and for being too strict.

Law throws a venomous glare at Sanji.

Law

This is mutiny! You've rallied my own men against me. Are you happy?

Sanji giggles, covering his mouth with the back of his hand, leaving Law to walk off grumpily and scout ahead in the forest with a handful of his crew.

Zoro sits up from the floor and leans an arm on Sanji's lounge chair.

Zoro

I'm getting some beer. Need anything?

Sanji plays with his goatee, then smirks, placing his hands back behind his head and closing his eyes for a quick snooze.

Sanji

Would you be so kind as to get me a glass of Pina Colada? I premixed some earlier today. Should be in the fridge.

Zoro

Do you want just a glass for yourself?

…Or the whole jug?

The swordsman gives him a smirk, emphasizing the last word in that sentence.

Sanji snaps his eyes open at the idea, then gazes to the side and sees Penguin and Shachi already looking at them while they fish together by the railing. They grin widely and give them the shaka sign.

Sanji

Fuck yeah. Get the jug.

—

Zoro makes his way down to the kitchen to do exactly that. He knows that the blonde likes making stuff pretty, so he makes an extra effort to garnish the drink with a small umbrella and a slice of lime on the side of the glass. It takes a lot longer than he anticipated but he wanted to get this right to impress him.

There's a sudden nagging sensation somewhere behind him–he senses danger and it’s aiming for his head. In one smooth motion, he spins, safely placing the cocktail on the counter with one hand and whips Wado out from its sheath with the other, blocking the oncoming sword attack just in time.

Niji

You know, I’ve just had enough waiting for the right moment when you’re not snogging each other.

As the blue-haired man spoke, their blades shook and rattled from the constant push against one another. Zoro hovers his now free hand over one of his other swords, readying himself to deliver a counter attack.

Niji reads his movement ahead of him and swipes a low spinning kick against the swordsman's ankle. He doesn't realise that he misses until he sees a shadow above him where Zoro had flipped overhead with ease to dodge his attack.

Zoro

What's your problem?

He unsheathes a second blade at the moment he lands on the ground. He stands firm with a basic stance.

Niji

You are, Demon Warlord.

Bending low, Niji stomps on one leg, creating a powerful surge of electricity from the base of his foot. As it spreads up to his thigh, Zoro's hair on his entire body stands on end and the lights throughout the Polar Tang flicker.

When the room dims for a few milliseconds, the blue-haired man disappears from sight.

The swordsman crosses his swords over his chest to block, and receives a powerful electrical kick at the X of his blades, barely seeing the other man’s movements. Zoro holds his body firm but the momentum sends his feet sliding until his back hits the wall.

Niji jumps and raises his own sword high above his head to bring it down on him.

Before the blade collides with his head, Zoro pushes himself off the wall and uses his own forehead to hit Niji square on his face. The man’s thick helmet bends at the mouth plate then shatters from the stress. Zoro's direct hit fractures both lenses of his goggles and breaks his nose.

The blue-haired commander staggers back but manages to regain his balance. The two straighten up almost at the same time. Niji cracks his neck, then removes broken off pieces of his helmet from his face with his free hand. He grabs the broken bridge of his nose to force it back into place with a loud snap, then spits out leftover blood from his mouth.

Zoro stood expressionless as blood trickled down his face from his forehead.

Zoro

Tough one, aren't you?

Niji

And I thought you'd be stronger.

They exchange another round of hits. This time, it felt more methodical to the swordsman, like he was being studied.

At one point, the aftershock from one of Niji’s kicks nearly tips Sanji’s drink off the counter. As if they had an unspoken agreement, they pause the fight so the blue-haired commander can catch the glass just in time before it falls off. They continue their barrage of attacks then.

Zoro

Enough of this.

The swordsman bites down Wado, enabling him to unsheathe a third sword.

Niji

That's more like it–!

Before Niji could finish speaking his thoughts, Zoro is suddenly in front of him.

Niji

What the–

The swordsman disarms the commander with one sweep of his blades. Without giving the other man much of a chance to counter, Zoro brings his swords across all together to deliver a powerful push, sending the other man flying to the far end of the room, damaging kitchen furnishings along the way.

Niji crashes against the wall with a choked grunt but doesn't fall on the ground. Instead, he catches himself on his knees, wheezing after getting the wind from his lungs drawn out of him.

Zoro

Ready to use your words?

Zoro approaches the man and points the tip of one sword to his neck.

Zoro

Or are you going to give me a reason to kill you?

Niji smirks, then slaps Zoro's sword away from his face casually.

Niji

You couldn't, even if you tried.

Zoro

I would have sooner if you had ruined Curly’s drink.

Niji

Trust me, I'm not the one who ruined it.

Zoro

What the fuck are you talking about?

Niji pushes himself up, swiping a leg at Zoro's direction.

Not wanting to do any more damage to the kitchen than he already has, the swordsman jumps back to avoid the hit.

Zoro

Seriously?! What is your problem?

Niji

My sources are right. You're not that bright, are you?

Zoro

Excuse me?

Niji walks to pick up his sword from the floor. He gives it a suave swing in the air and points the tip at Zoro's direction.

Niji

You actively sought out to kill our king for more than twenty years. And the next thing I know, he's involved himself with you? What a fucking joke. 

You may have seduced our brother, but I'm not buying that shit, Warlord. What's your game here?

Zoro's eyebrows furrow at that. Of course Sanji’s family is protective of him. He takes a moment to think about his next move, then finally he makes a decision. He eases his stance and throws down all of his swords between him and Niji.

Niji tips his head up slightly at the gesture. He takes a step forward, charging a ball of electricity in the claw of his hand, then lunges at Zoro.

The swordsman closes his eye and keeps his arms down.

The air suddenly stills. And everything was quiet.

When Zoro opens his eye, he sees the commander's hand hovering just an inch from his face, the electrical surge gone from it.

Niji

Tch. This is just boring now.

Niji puts his sword away then turns to walk to the kitchen sink. He digs through one of the broken cupboards and fishes out a dishtowel which he throws to Zoro who catches it.

The blue-haired commander runs his own towel through the water then cleans himself with it, including the blood off his face. Afterwards, he abandons the cloth on the floor. Without turning to face the other man, he speaks.

Niji

Tell me, swordsman, what are your intentions with my brother?

Zoro's eye narrows as he wipes the blood from his forehead with the cloth.

Zoro

We don't need your blessing to do what we want to do.

As they talk, Niji begins to open cupboards, taking out a chopping board and a knife. He begins to work on something that's out of Zoro's line of sight as his body is in the way.

Niji

Really now? Did he say that?

Zoro

Not exactly. But knowing him, he'll just do whatever the hell he wants to do.

Niji pauses his movements for a second, then continues with his work.

Niji

Do you really think you know who he is and what he’s like?

Zoro

We have known each other for a long time, we've been travelling together for months since Law sought us out, and you know that we're… involved.

Niji

Yes… I am well aware.

Zoro

So what's your problem?

Zoro hears a bang and a squelch from the kitchen counter. Niji gives the knife a spin in his hand then stabs the chopping board with it, leaving the knife sticking out. He turns to face the swordsman.

Niji

If you truly know him that well, then tell me, Roronoa Zoro….

Niji emphasized his name as he pushed himself off the counter. He approaches Zoro slowly and stops just a step away from him.

Niji

What’s his name?

Zoro frowns at that question. He opens his mouth to respond immediately as if it has an obvious answer, but then he slowly realises that it doesn't. He digs through his memories–the blonde’s Marine file that he's read and made reports for a thousand times, their time spent together travelling, and all the instances when they've fought, fucked or both–and come out with nothing. He can’t recall a time when he’d used his first name or learned it. All he remembers is a list of nicknames and titles that he and other people have given him, and that his family name is Vinsmoke. 

There and then, the swordsman starts questioning if that even is the case.

Niji tilts his head slightly, waiting for an answer. Zoro sees a glint of deep blue eyes glaring down on him. The other man looked unimpressed. With a lick of his lips, he finally breaks the silence.

Niji

Let’s reiterate what you said, shall we?

You have known each other for a long time. You have been travelling together for months since the doctor sought you out. And now, you’re apparently… “involved”.

Did you ask him even once about it? It seems like a simple question that you ask everyone.

Zoro

I…

Nothing. The swordsman had no good reason to justify why he hadn't asked the blonde for his name.

Niji

Your silence is reassuring.

Do you know why you don’t know his name?

Zoro remains quiet, already feeling berated and extremely guilty.

Niji takes another looming step closer, nearly closing the gap between them. He hovers his angry face in front of his.

Niji

Because, all these years, you either don’t care or he doesn’t trust you enough with it.

Which one is worse, do you think?

The swordsman doesn’t have any good answers to that question.

Niji takes a moment to read Zoro’s defeated face.

Niji

I think I’ve figured it out. It's both. You do care. But mostly, just for yourself.

The blue-haired man stomps to where Zoro had made Sanji’s cocktail. He grabs the drink and downs it in a couple of big gulps.

Zoro

Oi!

Niji wipes his mouth with the back of his hand then steals a fresh glass from the station. He begins to busy himself around the kitchen.

Niji

If he hasn’t given you his real name, then I wouldn’t bother too much, Warlord. You’re nothing but a phase to him. Eventually, he’ll get bored and find a new plaything. Unless you get lucky or have something more to offer like Doflamingo. Once he’s had his fill, he’s not going back for more.

When he turns around, he holds a fresh, more presentable Pina Colada in his hand garnished with pineapple fruit, its leaves and a single piece of cherry on top. It even has a matching straw that complemented the tiny umbrella. The drink has a nice amount of crushed ice in it too. Overall, it’s much better looking than the one that the swordsman made earlier. Niji approaches Zoro and hands it to him. Reluctantly, he takes it.

Niji

This is a warning for your own sake, Demon Warlord. I frankly don’t give a shit what he does to you. You could die in a hole for all I care. But if you hurt even a single strand of his hair, I will personally come down to your doorstep, pull each and every one of your fingernails and teeth, then shove your own balls into your mouth. That’s assuming you actually survive me beating the living shit out of you first.

At that, Niji walks off, leaving a stunned swordsman in the middle of the wrecked kitchen and a fancy drink in his hand.

After a moment of silence, Zoro takes a deep breath.

Zoro

…You can come out now, Bepo.

Bepo opens the pantry door where he had wedged himself in. He looks shaken.

Zoro

You uh… are you okay?

Bepo

You guys are scary when you fight….

—

Zoro finally re-emerges on the deck of the ship with a cocktail in his hand and a jug of premixed Pina Colada in another. Bepo followed closely behind him holding a bunch of glasses in a tray.

Sanji

Took you long enough! Did you get lost in the ship again, Marimo-kun?

Laughing, the blonde sits up and gives them a cheerful smile. When he sees Zoro and Bepo’s faces, his expression drops.

Sanji

What’s wrong? You two look like someone died.

Zoro sets the jug down under the shade of Sanji’s sun umbrella, following Bepo with the glasses. The swordsman bends down in front of the blonde, forcing a smile, offering him the drink that he could have made himself.

Zoro

Nothing happened. Just a little accident in the kitchen. It just took a bit longer to clean, that’s all. 

Sanji

Wait, is that for me? How did you know to put it together exactly how I like it?! It looks perfect, thank you!

Sanji grabs the cocktail from Zoro’s hand and gives his cheek a long loud smooch. He returns to sunbathing in the sun lounge chair and happily drinks from the glass. He hums in satisfaction.

After seeing their arrival, the remaining Heart Pirates onboard cluster around them and start asking if they can have some. Sanji waves them to form a line and wait for the swordsman to prep the drinks.

Sanji

Well, whatever it is, if this what came out of there, I say it was worth the trouble.

Zoro works quietly as he tries to get his head back to how it was earlier that day, only to find that he can’t shake Niji’s words off his head. He busies his hands, but not before realising that the blue-haired commander is sitting on the roof of the upper levels of the sub. It looks like he's fixed his broken goggles but he's still sporting the heavy fractured helmet on his head as he watched them closely.

Sanji

Did you get your beer?

Zoro

…Shit.

—

Law stood in the middle of the Polar Tang’s wrecked kitchen, his eyes dark behind the shade of his spotted cap. His knuckles turn white from gripping the sheath of his sword too tight.

Everyone stood behind him near the door to make a quick escape should they need to. Zoro and Niji are at opposite sides of the room after seemingly having an unspoken agreement to keep things quiet after their fight. Bepo looked nervously left and right between them.

Law

I was only gone for an hour….

The tone of Law’s voice sends chills up the Heart Pirates’ spines.

Law turns abruptly and looks at Bepo face to face.

The polar bear freaks and screams. He jumps back to hide behind Sanji, who is the next victim of Law’s hard stare.

Law

I come back… to find everyone tipsy drunk… and my kitchen in disarray….

Sanji

Don’t look at me! I haven’t stepped foot in here since breakfast!

There was a moment of silence. Law takes a step forward. Bepo visibly shakes from fear.

Zoro

It was me.

Everyone turns to the swordsman who’s currently busy digging into his ear with his pinky. Niji watches him straight-faced.

Zoro flicks the dirt from his finger, crosses his arms then looks at Law properly.

Zoro

I tried to make Pina Colada for Curls.

All eyes bore on him. Some looked at him in confusion, some started snickering and Bepo felt relieved to not need to confess anything to his captain. Niji huffs quietly, looking away.

Sanji scans the room, trying to picture the scene that unfolded.

Sanji

Oh, Mellorine…. This is not how you make a drink….

Zoro is banned from the kitchen from that day on.

----------

I'm going through some design reiterations for the Vinsmoke helmets now that the story's more fleshed out and I have a better idea of how they serve the story. I'm thinking, if Sanji's is making them them and his siblings have a say about the heavy things, they'd actually put some effort in making it look cool, and potentially add some extra mods on them. The new designs are meant to really show that Sanji respects and trusts them as his best and highest ranking officers.

[insanelyadd]

#LetSansRest Day!

Hello everyone and welcome to year two of Let Sans Rest Day! Same as last year it's August 9th.

Before we get into some prompts, a little bit of a mission statement. Last year I said this day was for everyone who's a fan of Sans Undertale or anyone who's tired of every image they see of him being him Suffering. This is still true, but I do want to additionally address something I saw a few different people mention.

I have actually received criticism for daring to suggest that Sans not be tormented to the point of insanity, and that this day where I implore people to make realities where Sans doesn't become a creepypasta insane murderer man from the agony he is subjected to, isn't a stand against ableism like Let Papyrus Say Fuck Day is. *stares in bipolar psychosis and PTSD directly into your eyes* Obviously that's a load of shit, and even though Sans is more popular than Papyrus (I say, as a Papyrus Enjoyer) a lot of the content around Sans is very specifically about him suffering. So simply out of spite for these comments (including someone who saw last year's announcement and directly commented "No <3" on the post) I will be continuing this holiday indefinitely, just like LetPapyrusSayFuck Day. Die mad about it.

Just like how I have ADHD and relate to Papyrus and see the way the fandom treats him as the infantilization of neurodivergency like autism and ADHD, I can look at works in this fandom of Sans that demonize traits of mental illness like trauma, hallucinations, delusions, and mania. And I can say these are both bad actually. Not going to call anyone a bad person for engaging in these things, of course, that would be a bit goofy of me, I'm just saying the imagery used for these things is Very Loaded and a lot of people are mishandling them.

So anyways August 9th is the day we let Sans Undertale out of his Torment Nexus so he can:

Have lemonade at the beach or pool

Go stargazing while camping out in the woods with friends and family

Get smothered in cute baby kittens and puppies

Go to therapy and play with one of those magnetic sculptures all therapists seem to own

Take a nap on an inner-tube on a lazy river

Get to see the leaves change color for the first time

Play basketball with Papyrus

Fall asleep in a basket of freshly dried clothes

Go to a public greenhouse to look at all the different flowers on the surface

Perform stand-up for humans who all love his terrible puns

Please tag the post with #LetSansRest, #Sans, and #undertale as well as any other applicable tags for characters, relationships, etc. This day is primarily for classic Sans but it's not like I can stop you from drawing Fell Sans not being subjected to his own, personal, goth-themed Torment Nexus.

This is meant to be a day for everyone who wants Sans Undertale to go to therapy and feel better. People who want to put him in a hamster cage with plenty of things to prank for enrichment. People who want to win him one of those massive stuffed animals at the county fair.

If you want to participate please be mindful of some things:

I will be monitoring the tag to reblog things! I have ptsd and would appreciate if ships involving Papyrus or Frisk (and similar) with Sans are avoided. This is simply for my mental health and I greatly appreciate it. <3

Do Not post angst to the #LetSansRest tag. It is meant to be an angst free tag for him.

Don't worry if you can't participate on the exact day! Just like with #LetPapyrusSayFuck Day you can use the tag and post to it any day! :>

Hope you're able to participate and have fun! <3

[ktredshoes]

HBO War Fanfiction Stats

Let me start by saying that I am not in any sense criticizing anybody's taste in HBO War relationships. In my opinion, any well-written fanfic, regardless of ship, is worthy. Heck, any fanfic is worthy — it takes a special type of creative courage to write and share a fanfiction story so that others might appreciate what you see in characters you love. So, that's the first thing.

Buckle up, I get wordy. More under the cut.

Tagging a handful of folks who showed interest in my decidedly unscientific findings: @onyxsboxes @jesslovesboats @itstheheebiejeebies @onekisstotakewithme @sparkling-strychnine

Trying something here: @meyerlansky @anachilles @astolovewithallmyheart @dano-png

I started down this fanfiction stat rabbit hole about four years ago when I started looking at The Pacific tags on Archive of Our Own (AO3). I was trying to figure out if it was just my imagination or not that everything other than Sledgefu in TP fanfic felt like a rarepair. I was not surprised to find statistical backup for what anecdotally felt true.

I love all the HBO War series — and for the record, I consider Band of Brothers, The Pacific, Generation Kill, and Masters of the Air to all be part of this fandom community. I won't get into trying to rank them or make the case that one is better than another — they are all related in being stories of men at war, and three specifically stories of men at war during World War II — but direct comparisons, in my opinion, are apples to oranges to prosciutto to tiramisu. They all have different raison d'etres. So that's the second thing.

(I will admit to a particular soft spot for The Pacific as the overlooked "younger brother" to Band of Brothers, precisely because of the tendency of some to negatively compare it to BoB. TP was never intended to be "part two" of Band of Brothers — I was listening recently to a podcast with Tony To, an executive producer of both shows, who asserted that BoB was, yes, about the brotherhood of war, but TP was about the cost of war. )

Anyway.

A couple of days ago, I saw someone post about the fact that the Cleven/Egan ship in Masters of the Air was about to hit 1,000 stories on AO3 — and since I knew that the total number of stories was only about 1,400ish, I figured it was time to take a look at MotA stats too. And that led to looking at GK stats and BoB stats and once I finished, I was really struck by what I saw.

I have a whole spreadsheet looking at the four shows, with breakdowns by relationship and character, with percentages of total stories. (I've posted some graphics from those spreadsheets below, not to worry.)

So what did I learn?

The Pacific and Masters of the Air both are overwhelmingly dominated by a single ship — Sledgefu in the case of TP and Clegan in the case of MotA.

As of August 10, 2024, there were 1,500 stories on AO3 tagged for The Pacific, and 1,485 tagged for Masters of the Air. Sledgefu features in 884 of TP stories, which is 58.93% of the total.

You might think that's an astounding total — but Clegan features in an astonishing 986 of MotA stories, or 66.4% of all stories. The falloff in the next highest ship in each fandom is precipitous: Hilldane in 14% of TP stories (210), and Crubbles in 8.82% of MotA stories (131).

If you are a fan of any ship aside from the most popular pairing in these two fandoms, that has got to be terribly discouraging. You wouldn't think the dropoff would be so high if you're at all active in the HBO War fandom on Tumblr, based on what's posted on a daily basis, but if your entry to HBO War fanfic is solely on AO3, what would you think?

I will once again state that I'm making no judgement on anybody's favorite pairing — I'm making a case on behalf of all the other ships. I'll also note that there are many, many fics posted to Tumblr that never make it to AO3, and I would very much encourage those authors to please please please consider posting your stories to AO3! (If you don't have an account on AO3, it currently takes about 10 days from requesting an invitation to receiving it, which is not that long in the scheme of things.)

The popularity of TP and MotA characters in these stories shows a similar disparity between the most popular and everybody else. In The Pacific, Snafu features in 63.53% of AO3 stories (953) and Sledge in 62.6% (939). No one else is as high as even 20% -- Burgie is in 17.2% (258) and Ack Ack is in 15.6% (234) and Hillbilly in 14.73% (221). The other two ostensibly lead characters in TP are Bob Leckie (12.53% or 188 stories) and John Basilone (1.67% or 25). I find that just shocking.

MotA is both better and worse. There are 10 characters who appear in 10% or better of posted stories on AO3 — but the dropoff from most popular to next highest is even more dramatic. Bucky Egan features in 77.9% of stories (1,157) and Buck Cleven in 74.28% (1,103). The next highest is not, as you might think, Harry Crosby or Rosie Rosenthal, the other featured lead characters in the series. It's Curt Biddick, who is in 25.19% of stories (374), followed by Croz in 23.7% (352). Next is Rosie, who is tied with John Brady — both in 16.9% or 251 stories. What a steep drop!

But, hey, at least there are a baker's dozen plus one of characters who feature in at least 100 MotA stories:

Egan: 1,157 stories (77.91%)

Cleven: 1,103 (74.28%)

Biddick: 374 (25.19%)

Crosby: 352 (23.7%)

Brady: 251 (16.9%)

Rosenthal: 251 (16.9%)

DeMarco: 243 (16.36%)

Payne: 225 (15.15%)

Lemmons: 181 (12.19%)

Hamilton: 167 (11.25%)

Marge Spencer: 146 (9.83%)

Douglass: 139 (9.36%)

Kidd: 130 (8.75%)

Blakely: 111 (7.47%)

After 14 years, will TP ever develop more diversity on AO3? Probably doubtful — though since I first checked the stats in 2020, Hilldane has gained 2%, so there's slow change but some change. Eight months in since the birth of the MotA fandom, and Clegan, and by extension Bucky and Bucky, are steamrollering the rest of the MotA relationships and characters on AO3 — based on what I see on Tumblr, I don't know if that huge disparity will hold up, but who knows? It's still a very new fandom.

But what about GenKill and BoB, you say?

Well, as you might have guessed, there's a clear delineation in GK between the top ship and the next ones below it, but the dropoff is not nearly as dramatic as in TP and MotA.

There are 3,024 Generation Kill stories on AO3 as of August 10, 2024, and the number one ship is Brad/Nate, with 1,261 stories, or 41.7% of the total. Next highest is Brad/Ray, with 677 stories, or 22.39%. The top three characters are Brad, featured in 63.82% of stories (1,930), then Ray, featured 52.35% of the time (1,583 stories), followed by Nate (45.44% or 1,374 stories). Next is Walter Hasser at 571 stories (18.88%), followed by Poke Espera at 284 stories (9.39%), Mike Wynn at 262 stories (8.66%), then Doc Bryan at 254 stories (8.4%). There's that dropoff again!

And as for Band of Brothers? After nearly 21 years on AO3 (the oldest story dates from November 2003), there are 5,016 BoB stories on AO3, with a huge number of ships and characters — albeit some quite small. Frankly, I stopped counting after getting to 70 relationships and 55 characters — I just got tired!

Still.

Let me add that the earliest BoB stories on AO3 are not well tagged for ships or characters — many don't have any tags at all. I don't know the reason for it — whether the tagging system in the early AO3 days wasn't easy to navigate, or maybe the lack of tagging was a holdover from earlier systems or archives? I have no idea how well-tagged stories were on LiveJournal, Dreamwidth, or Fanfiction.net. So anyhow, early BoB stories on AO3, if tagged according to current standards, would definitely change the stats but I have no insight on how it might shift them, except definitely upward for the most popular characters and ships.

At any rate: onward.

The top BoB ships on AO3 are 1) Winnix — 1,250 stories or 24.92%, 2) BabeRoe — 771 stories or 15.37%, 3) Webgott — 663 stories or 13.22%, and 4) Speirton — 662 stories or 12.4%.

Moving on to characters, there are a dozen that feature in 10% or better of the BoB total. Take a look:

Winters: 1,173 stories (34.35%)

Nixon: 1,652 (32.93%)

Roe: 1,380 (27.51%)

Speirs: 1,135 (22.63%)

Heffron: 1,125 (22.43%)

Luz: 1,063 (21.19%)

Liebgott: 1,058 (21.09%)

Lipton: 978 (19.5%)

Webster: 790 (15.75%)

Toye: 749 (14.93%)

Guarnere: 686 (13.68%)

Malarkey: 514 (10.25%)

That's a much more even distribution here, without the massive dropoff in the other three fandoms. Or as @itstheheebiejeebies put it to me: "BoB fans feast on variety. It's a grazing table instead of main and side courses." Just so.

So what do I take from all this? I mean, in the case of MotA, I came into the fandom all gaga over Callum Turner and thus Bucky Egan. But then I quickly veered off into following Benny DeMarco (Adam Long) and for the past several months I've fallen under the spell of Everett Blakely (David Shields). Will I stay there? I have no idea! And that's kind of exhilarating.

But here's what I know for sure: as I continue to read and write HBO War fanfic, I'm going to be doing my best to support the ships and characters out of the top tier.

Creators: Don't just post your fanfic to Tumblr — post it to AO3 and tag it.

Be the change that you want to see.

---------------------------------

Now, as promised, here are the stats in graphic form.

[catras-breakup-song]

yeah sure, i'll tell you something that repeatedly pisses me off to no end:

images shamelessly stolen from here

when catra haters say this type of dialogue is a good example of her "abuse"

it's lighthearted affection, playful bantering! many friends bully each other this way all the time for the laughs; i know i always have and nobody minded!

some people may not like it, and that's fine, you don't have to! but your opinion does not change how the characters canonically feel about it. if adora happily takes it without strife and understands the intention in the moment, then there is no issue. you could argue that she calls herself an idiot the episode after she rescues catra from prime's ship, but i genuinely believe that's just a result of her being too harsh toward herself all the time anyway without any influence from catra. even when she didn't have to worry about her as an enemy throughout her average days in bright moon, she still kept that weight burdened on her shoulders regardless.

such an example of the criticism i'm referring to is someone complaining in this reddit post, albeit not necessarily from an anti since they seem to simply not understand and therefore disapprove based on their own personal feelings about the situation among the replies. there's also this comment, which adds some objective truth to catra's partial-insult.

as another individual pointed out, throughout the first seasons it came from more of a "duh! how do you not get it?" condescending attitude (think of adora's final revelation in 01x02 that the horde was evil while catra had known her whole life, and later on in 03x03 when catra points out how silly it sounds to admit you'd listen blindly to anything an old hologram has to say ─ even if it did happen to be correct), but i also added that when it comes to season five it originates more from a place of concern, hence upholding her half of the promise for the two of them to look out for each other at all times. if adora lacks so much awareness, she'll constantly end up in dangerous situations, and that's exactly what eventually ended up happening when she followed shadow weaver's manipulated guidance to accept the failsafe.

it drains so much energy from me to give this bad-faith argument any attention so hopefully i'll only have to do it this once. it's not worth getting frustrated over so don't waste your time trying to convince reactionaries that this trait of all things is what makes her such a terrible person.

[masochist-marmot]

A fair and balanced look at MHA chapter 431

To all of my fellow bakudeku and togachako truthers out there: I see you, I hear you, and your disappointment is valid. I agree with a lot of the criticism. However, I have a lot of nuanced thoughts, and I will attempt to write them down in a balanced way, so bear with me. I will also treat the leaks as though they were confirmed for now.

(This post became an essay so I'll divide it into subheadings for clarity.)

Reminder: Be kind

Before I get into this, I'd like to remind everyone to please be kind and understanding when having this discourse. I get that there are strong feelings involved, but please don't harass the creators or other members of the community. Remember that at the end of the day this is fiction, and no one has the right to dictate how others view it or consume it. You are allowed to express your opinions and feelings, but try to be respectful to those who don't share them. No matter what side of the issue you stand on.

Queer relationships in shounen

First of all, I understand that it's disappointing when potential queer relationships are sidelined in favour of compulsory heterosexuality. But I can't say that I'm surprised. The standards and norms of depicting relationships in shounen manga go deep, and while it would be nice to see them challenged, we have to remember that there is an entire industry behind these decisions. I'm talking about genre conventions, authorial decisions (affected by unconscious biases), editors, publishers and a whole lot of moving parts. There's a lot of money involved, which means that any changes to the conventions will happen at a snail's pace. I am not excusing the decisions Horikoshi made, but it's good to be mindful that the decisions don't take place in a vacuum. I went into the series with the full expectations that none of the same-sex relationships would be made canon, so I'm not overtly disappointed with that being the case. It's the same expectation I take to any shounen series.

It's obviously worthwhile to question and challenge conventions like these, that's how progress is made. But focusing on a specific author's specific choices might not be the best way to go about it. Although it's worth pointing out that Horikoshi didn't have to make any relationship canon, yet chose to do so. Let me get into that.

Why IzuOcha falls flat

There is no denying that izuocha seems to have been the end goal from the very beginning. She's the first girl, Izuku took immediate notice of her, and her feelings for him became her entire character for a while. It's a cute ship, I guess. The issue is that it lacks any real depth. I'm going to be completely honest with you: I don't think Horikoshi is very good at writing compelling female characters. A lot of the male characters get amazing character arcs, while many female heroes only get a couple of cool moments (full of fanservice) and are promptly discarded. Himiko and Ochako, who have the most compelling female relationship of any kind in the entire series, fail the very simple Bechdel test miserably. Half of their conversations literally revolve around the male protagonist.

I believe this is why many of us prefer bakudeku over izuocha. The boys just get much better character development both as individuals and in relation to each other. Izuku and Ochako's moments don't cut nearly as deep, and while they do somewhat further Ochako's character development, they seem to have no bearing on Deku's character. Meanwhile Uraraka's conflict with Toga meaningfully challenges and alters both characters' worldview, even though their relationship had much less time and opportunities to develop. To me this whole situation just reads as Horikoshi giving Deku a canon love interest early on, then failing to develop the relationship and having to rush it to get the ending he intended.

Character study: Izuku and Katsuki 8 years later

Now I'll ignore authorial intent for a while and ponder on how the leaked chapter reflects on the character development of my main boys. I'm actually not that mad about the decisions Deku makes in this (forced romance aside). I seem to be in the minority that's fine with Deku losing OFA and becoming a teacher, because I actually think it suits him perfectly. In chapter 430 I mostly took issue with him being lonely for eight years and then jumping the gun to become a hero again, which seemed kinda contradictory. If he was truly contented with being a teacher, they could've made it clearer. Though I'm not going to lie, Kacchan funding his battle armor was incredibly cute. In the leaked chapter, it almost feels like they were trying to reinforce the notion that Deku is happy with his life as a teacher, which feels a little forced, but I can respect it. You have to remember that he's been quirkless for eight years and has had time to come to terms with it. People change a lot in eight years. I barely recognise the person I was eight years ago. So what rubbed me the wrong way wasn't that he rejected Kacchan's roundabout offer but the way he rejected it. Like the guy's really hung up on you, the least you could do is let him down easy.

What I think is an especially hard pill to swallow is the distance between Kacchan and Deku. Unfortunately, it also kinda tracks. Hear me out. Their relationship maintained its intensity because of the rivalry. It motivated their respective personal growths, it pushed them further, and it tied them closer together. And it was magnificent. What we see here is that Katsuki is still driven by the will to compete, but Izuku isn't. He's a teacher now, he's got lives to change, he can't be bothered with competition and numbers. While Deku was building his new identity and new life, Kacchan was still hung up on the past: He was collecting funds for the suit to get Deku back into the game, he was rejecting sidekicks who didn't spark the same joy in him, and he was slowly dropping in the charts because he didn't have Deku to push him to try (also something about his personality, I'll just let it slide). I think in this chapter we kind of see him finally accept it. He doesn't push a hero suit on a rival and urge him on anymore, instead he forms an offer to join him as an unrelated question about if Deku's still intent on teaching. Since he says yes, Kacchan won't even bring the agency offer up; Kirishima has to translate the intention. Which is where I think Deku's answer has uncharacteristically little tact.

Does Kacchan deserve a better ending than this? ABSOLUTELY. Does the ending we get counter the character development seen so far? I don't think so. The sad reality is that people do grow up, and I see the ending we get as one possibility that reflects that. I would've also been happy with an ending where Deku keeps OFA and the boys go be gay fight crime for the rest of their lives together, but in all honesty, Deku coming a full circle back to quirklessness is more thematically satisfying to me. Mind you, none of this means that the relationship between these two isn't important to them. It just means that it was always bound to change, adapt and grow to a different direction. Kacchan's final goodbye may seem like an important moment that was completely brushed off, or you can see it as not being important because it's not a goodbye. These two men will continue to be part of each other's lives. And now I kind of want to read comfort fics about what their new relationship and domestic life would look like.

Brief togachako tangent

I said in an earlier post that I will be a togachako truther until the day I die, and I stand by that. In my book, it's already canon. Though sadly, it was also doomed. I'm a little conflicted on the whole thing. On one hand, I think Toga had a satisfying character arc, but on the other hand, we mostly just got our gays buried. Still, purely from a character perspective, I don't see her pushing Uraraka to live her life as a problem. Toga would definitely not want Uraraka to dwell on her memories and guilt. They seem to be bound together by blood now, and that won't change. Neither of them gain anything if Ochako denies herself happiness by not pursuing other relationships. Still, I understand the criticism in a narrative sense. It does come off as a queer character used as a device to push forward a comphet relationship. I just want them both to be happy.

Final thoughts: Canon is not law

I have shared my complicated thoughts and feelings on this presumed final chapter. You are obviously allowed to disagree with me, and your thoughts and feelings are just as valid as mine.

I think it's important to remember that you don't have to treat canon as law. The canonicity of something has never dictated how you should interact with the media. Obviously the author making something canon has a bearing on their story, but that's just what it is. It's their story. Which means that we don't have any say in what they decide to do with it, but they also have no say in how we make their story our own. If the ending is left open, it's left open for a reason. You get to interpret what happens next based on your reading of the story.

So please go create fan content where Izuku keeps his powers and hero status and where he keeps his rivalry alive, or write a fanfic about his life as a teacher. Go explore how the thing with Uraraka develops (I trust that many of you would do a better job than Horikoshi), or ignore that part completely. Write about Uraraka's blood bond with Toga, maybe their relationship is still worth exploring post-mortem. Hell, make it a polyship between the girls and Deku. And there are so many things about Deku and Bakugou's relationship as adults that I'd read about and see fanart of, whether or not you take my interpretation of them into account.

[castingspellsanddaisies]

How's sexy time with...Jobe Bellingham? + his general personality + how's he emotionally? + how's he as a partner? | Tarot Reading

DISCLAIMER: Take everything with a grain of salt and have fun!

WOW... The brothers really look alike, huh?

This post has 18+ content, so if you don't want to read it, beat it.

How's sexy time with him?

9 of swords + 9 of cups + queen of cups + king of swords + king of wands reversed + 8 of wands reversed + 4 of swords + judgement + the star

Ladies and gentlemen, this man right here... Knows what he's doing.

What's the word? Munch? Yes, that's it. Jobe loooves to go down on his partner like there's no tomorrow. And he likes to make them scream! The wetter, the loudest the better for him.

He's loud too. I feel like he talks a lot during it and he's very vocal. Hot. He likes to call the shots, so very demanding (''now open your legs for me'', ''louder I wanna hear you'' ''who told you to stop, baby?'' these phrases came into my mind, so... Similar to this).

BUT he may have problems climaxing and making his partner c*m with only penetra*on. Oh, I see... That's why he prefers oral s*x. He liked to finish with his partner suc*ing him off most of times. And vice versa.

He's just... Really good with his mouth. Squ*rting too. And he goes round after round after round...

What's his general personality?

mountain + ship + lily + star | back of the deck: bouquet

the wheel of fortune + page of wands reversed + 3 of swords reversed + 10 of pentacles reversed | back of the deck: 2 of pentacles

Jobe's very hard on himself to always be better than he was yesterday. But he feels like his life's not moving as he would like.

He struggles a lot to have confidence in himself and in his goals, what he does. But here's the thing: Jobe is good at hiding his insecurities from everybody. He's very good at pretending everything is fine. He adapts easy to any situation. He acts like the people around him act.

I see that he has some insecurties concerning ''making his family proud''. Do I have to say it out loud? It's about him having big shoes (Jude's) to fill.

How's he emotionally?

king of wands + the moon reversed + king of pentacles + justice reversed | back of the deck: 5 of cups

Jobe's kind of pessimistic.

he likes to go to the core of every trouble he faces. He's not afraid to dig in and find ugly things about himself and other people. He prefers to know the ugly truth than live with pretty lies.

He's very critical with himself. He must be careful to not be unkind and unfair sometimes to people.

How's he as a partner in romantic relationships?

garden + cross + letter + crossroads | back of the deck: lily

10 of cups reversed + the star reversed + 4 of cups + 8 of pentacles | back of the deck: 5 of swords

He's the thing: Jobe's very reticent about dating, and that's because he feels like there's no one good enough for him. But calm down! What I mean is that Jobe can see how the ''dating scenario'' is nowadays and he doesn't like what he sees (people cheat all the time, they lack commitment, lack of accountability, lack of maturity...).

He's easy to disatisfy when he tries a relationship with someone. And he lacks mtivation to try something serious. It's like he lost faith in good relationships happening for him. And he's very direct about it with people. He doesn't shy away from saying how relationships are not for him - at least not right now. He loses interest quickly.

That's it, folks. I hope you enjoyed the reading! Take care <3

[burningcheese-merchant]

BurningCheese Ficlet for y'all

I'm planning to take a break from AO3 for a little while, because I wrote 4 fics in 4 days and my head hurts. (I don't usually write anything this fast, but when I'm truly inspired, I'm a man on a fucking mission lol)

Here's a relatively short fic for you guys to enjoy while I'm gone. It's wholesome (for once). Hope whoever reads it enjoys it, whether they like this ship or not

Post-canon (technically), Burning Spice is no longer a threat to anyone, he's just an asshole who's down bad

"Hm? Golden Cheese eyed the envelope being handed to her critically. "And this is...?"

"For you," Burning Spice said. "It is a romantic holiday today, is it not? Is this not what couples do for one another in celebration?" "I don't recall us ever being a couple, Mr. Burning Spice," Golden Cheese muttered, crossing her arms and giving him a look. "So I'm not sure what possesses you to want to celebrate a day not meant for either of us." "You possess me, my little thief. That is all the motivation I need." He returned her look of annoyance with a look of cool confidence, giving her a flirtatious smile. "Regardless, why do you shun a heartfelt gift? Are gestures of admiration such as these not what you like to receive from others?"

"They are," Golden Cheese said, "But I can't imagine whatever you've brought to me being 'heartfelt'. In fact, I didn't realize that word even existed within your vocabulary before today." He chuckled at her little jab, much to her own furthered annoyance. "You wound me, pretty bird. Why do you judge me for my appearance? Why don't you read this and see for yourself what I am capable of?" "It's hardly your appearance. I've encountered far more brutish beings than you who turned out to be bigger sweethearts than Pure Vanilla." She sighed. "But... fine, very well. If you went to this trouble, I suppose I can entertain it this once." "Yes... please do, my little thief." His smile grew bigger. "Entertain me."

She narrowed her eyes at him, but otherwise did nothing to challenge him further and took the envelope into her hands. It was surprisingly fancy; adorned with intricate little patterns that she recognized to be commonplace in Wild Spice artistry. When she opened it, the smell of spice reached her nose, causing her to sneeze. Burning Spice chuckled again, and she shot him a disapproving glare. He gave her a look of endearment, his eyes twinkling with mirth and mischief. He did not speak, but he did not need to; she knew exactly what he meant by that face, for he'd given it to her before, along with the words meant to describe it. You're so adorable when you sneeze.

Not wanting to encourage this sentiment any further, she turned her attention back to the envelope and pulled out the letter inside. A pale reddish-orange, scented with nutmeg and tumeric. The words were written with black ink - in quite good handwriting, much to her surprise. A very quick skim told her it was a poem. She brought her eyes back to the very top and started again, reading it diligently, word for word:

"You flaunt your beauty in the rose, your glory in the dawn, Your sweetness in the nightingale, your whiteness in the swan. You haunt my waking like a dream, my slumber like a moon, Pervade me like a musky scent, possess me like a tune. Yet, when I crave of you, my sweet, one tender moment's grace, You cry, 'I sit behind the veil, I cannot show my face'. Shall any foolish veil divide my longing from my bliss? Shall any fragile curtain hide your beauty from my kiss? What is this war of thee and me? Give o'er the wanton strife. You are the heart within my heart, the life within my life."

Golden Cheese's mouth hung slightly agape by the time she finished, her face hot and cheeks flushed so red that she was certain it could be seen even all the way back home. "Burning Spice," she began. "I..." "You...?" he asked back, clearly enjoying the look on her face far too much. She stood silent for a moment longer before she collected herself. "It's... this is lovely," she said. "I don't know what to say. I... I truly did not think you were ever capable of something like this." "That's alright, pretty bird. Your eyes say enough." Oh, if only that blasted smile of his would fall away already. It was making her feel even stranger. "You and your people aren't the only ones with silver tongues in your mouths."

She hadn't been insulting the Wild Spices earlier, she had been insulting him - but even so, she had no choice but to admit her folly. "Fair enough," she said. "I was wrong to judge you so harshly. If I may gift you with something in return, it's with me saying that this would fit in among the works of my own kingdom's finest poets." "Would it, now? Such high praise, coming from you," Burning Spice purred. "But I'm afraid I'd rather you gift me with something else." "Oh?" She tilted her head at him. "And what would that be?" He answered her by coming closer, closer, until they stood toe to toe and his face was not so far from hers anymore. "I think you know," he said. He cupped her chin. "Or shall you let a veil divide us any longer?"

At this, Golden Cheese said nothing. She only let him tilt her head up gently, and her eyes flutter shut, as he leaned down and captured her lips with his own. Burning Spice kissed her sweetly, tenderly - so unlike what she expected of him, such a feeling and taste she never thought she'd find within spice like his. He licked at her lips, soft but still forceful enough to be noticed, politely asking for entry - and she obliged him, parting her lips and sighing into their kiss as his tongue slipped into her mouth and caressed her own. She felt a hand touch hers, rough fingers ghost against her skin, and she obliged him again, taking his hand into her own and lacing their fingers together. When they parted, he lingered there for a little while longer, their now half-lidded eyes locked and foreheads touching. The fire that always burned so bright in his eyes was now brought down to a smolder, reminding her more of the warmth of a fireplace than a scorching inferno. She could still feel his breath, taste it: hot and spicy, a shock to her senses. But... it wasn't so bad. It wasn't bad at all, actually. ...But he didn't need to know that. She'd fed his ego enough for one day.

"My little golden thief," he purred. "I thank you. Your gift is as lovely as mine." "...You're welcome," she murmured. "But... don't expect any more like it." "I won't," he said, that familiar sharp-toothed smile creeping back across his face, "Just the same as you expected me to give you something crude and mediocre." Her eyes widened and her eyebrows shot up in surprise, both at his words and the little jab hidden behind them. She opened her mouth to retort - but he cut her off before she could by kissing her again. Lightning fast, but still hot and rough, stealing the breath from her lungs. When he pulled back, that godforsaken grin came back in full force, stretching from ear to ear. "See?" he asked playfully. She chose not to respond this time, instead only huffing at him. Such audacity need not be dignified in such a manner. (And it wasn't because she had no real rebuttal to give him. Really. Honest.)

He gave her hand a squeeze before letting it go and stepping back again, giving her back her personal space. "Well, then," he said. "I shall give you one last gift by allowing you to enjoy the rest of this day on your own terms." "How kind of you, Burning Spice," Golden Cheese said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Once again, you surprise me with your words and actions." "Golden Cheese..." He turned his back and peeked at her from over his shoulder, his eyes burning bright once again. "I intend to keep surprising you as many times as you'll allow." With that said, he turned and began walking away. She watched him leave with her arms crossed, staring daggers at the back of his head as he left. Finally, she was free. No more of his nonsense; she can bask in light and peace again.

And yet, his parting words still rang in her ears. "I intend to keep surprising you as many times as you'll allow." Just where did he get this brazenness from? Wherever he cultivated it, she wanted the earth salted and burned. After everything that's happened, after her granting him a goddess's mercy by allowing him to continue existing in her life after all was said and done, and he repays her with this never-ending foolishness? Well, she could commend his stubbornness, if nothing else. But this time was a step too far. This was the first Valentine's Day gift she's ever received from him, and it shall be the last. Next time, she will turn him away without remorse. Won't she?

She turned her eyes back to the paper in her hand. To the beautiful envelope that had housed it. To the poem inscribed on the page, that serenaded her without making a single sound. Golden Cheese, against her own better judgment, brought the poem back closer to her face and read it a second time. When she finished, she tucked it back into the envelope - carefully, so it wouldn't tear. And then she sighed. ...No. No, she won't.

---------------------------------------

The poem here is "Humayun to Zobeida" from the poetry collection "The Golden Threshold" (bet you know why I chose a poem from there lol), all written by Indian poet Sarojini Naidu. Please check it out if/when you can, her works are lovely and you can read them for free online (also a lot of the poems give me BurningCheese feels, especially "To the God of Pain")

Y'all let me know if you enjoyed this, I thought of a sequel and I'll write and post it if you want

[jesterbells]

Tumblr New Word Dictionary

I love new words. So here's a list of recently created words and idioms I have learned through tumblr (not all of these terms were invented on tumblr but that's where I learned them--the citations specify whether the term was coined by a specific post, or cite a source for where I first heard the term even if that is not necessarily where the term originated):

blorbo: a fictional character you're a fan of. Coined by thelustiestargonianmaid.

"I'm so hungry I could get banned from facebook": coined by babyslime in response to a Wil Wheaton post

GORIMM: Gross Older Relation I Must Marry. Source: bethanydelleman

hlep: when a disabled person asks for a specific kind of help and "they do something that is not what you ask for but is what they think you should have asked for ... Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hlep." Source: giantkillerjack's therapist.

horse fantasy: something that is theoretically possible unicorn fantasy: something that is definitely (or almost definitely) impossible. Source: bemusedlybespectacled.

zomancy: soup divination. Source: cryptotheism.

UFOs: unfinished objects--"something that is unfinished but in hibernation," as distinct from WIPs. Source: knitting community and bylambd.

autoenshittification: turning cars into digital extraction machines to steal your data and money through digital infrastructure and microchips, and the endless repair nightmare of digital car systems and cybersecurity vulnerabilities. Source: mostlysignssomeportents

nude: "when your clothes are off." naked: "when you're clothes are off when you're up to something." nakey: "when you are an animal and your collar has been removed." Source.

sideways fan: following a fandom second-hand. Source: capricorn-0mnikorn.

spoken Garamond: "the over-emphasized voice people use to read poems." Source: Frances Klein's friend.

nongry/nungry: when you're starving but also don't want to eat any of the food in your kitchen. Coined by tathrin.

scrumbling: scrolling on tumblr. Coined by the mum of anti-terf-posts.

window shipping: "any shipping done without actually watching/reading the work in question." Coined by lurker-no-more.

friend John / a Friend John answer: "when someone asks a relatively reasonable question in context and the enquiree 1) speaks at length without answering the question, and 2) implies the enquirer has injured the enquiree by even asking such a thing how could you." Coined by sileana.

bitism: a new school of media criticism which asks the simple question: is the work committed to the bit? Coined by linecoveredinjellyfish

snors d'oeuvre: having a little nap on the sofa before taking onseself to bed for main sleep. Coined by SJKSalisbury (can't find the tumblr repost now).

socratic terror: "what every athenian felt when they went down to the agora in the 5th century and saw an old man with a beard approaching them." Coined by lesbianshepard.

introvirtuous: "when you're introverted but have taken on numerous leadership and outgoing roles in your life." "I'm here to help. But I'd rather not be." "Someone around here has to get things done. and unfortunately it's going to be me." Coined by soundslikerhetorical.

grundlous: "of or pertaining to grundle." Coined by IMLIZY.

concretes: specific aspects of a character that persist across interpretations. The essential, structural essence that makes a character recognizable as the same person. Rarely physical traits; subjective. Coined by Ladylark and kayanem.

skeletonin: "the happiness chemical released when you see a ghoul or perhaps a ghost." Coined by gwentrification.

broflakes: "the weak, fragile 'alpha' males who are so easily threatened by strong women." Source: rickladd (can't find the tumblr reblog atm).

the planet of hats: "the thing where a people only have one thing going for them, like 'everyone wears a silly hat.'" Source: Star Trek fandom & TV tropes, learned via homonculus-argument.

feelings yakuza: "those who turn their personal discomfort into a social evil and try to erase the target completely." Source: Japanese fandom via マロミチャン.

Ship of Thesaurus / Rogetism: "When a student copies an essay online instead of writing it and then painstakingly changes every word to a synonym until the text no longer makes any sense." Coined by trek-tracks and Chris Sadler respectively.

Flemming's law / vibe dysphoria: "the most toxic person you've ever met over-relates to woodland creatures on social media." Coined by Chris Flemming and canadianwheatpirates.

fight with a gorilla: "any secret or invisible struggle." Coined by punksandcannonballers.

squimbus from my polls: the poll version of blorbo except for obscure fan favorite characters. Coined by yardsards.

pebbling: "the act of sending your friends & family little videos and tweets and memes you find online, like how penguins bring back pebbles to their little penguin loved ones." Source: NurseKelsey (can't find the tumblr reblog atm).

serpentineabouts: roundabouts that aren't round. Coined by paulgadzikowski.

luft: air equivalent of wet. Coined by questbedhead.

getting the good bologna: "when you experience something of better quality and then you’re doomed to no longer be satisfied." Coined by the family of kelssiel.

hypofixation: "the kind of things that you've autisticly decided you Do Not Care About." Antonym of hyperfixation. Coined by animate-mush.

[purpledemonlilyposting]

Lily is making throwaways to talk to herself now cause she's too afraid to turn anons back on.

[Lily's post]

There are so many golden nuggets in here. Since these are both most likely Lily lets look at a few!

Lily's media takes are beyond just bad, she asserts that the creators of children's cartoons are dangerous extremists for perceived bad messaging in their works that Lily just makes up.

Even without that Lily's takes on symbolism, metaphor, and just basic narrative structure are worth examining because they are some of the most bizarre and ignorant many of us have ever encountered.

But no one "orients their life around you", Lily. It just feels that way because you sit in your subsidized apartment on the internet all day ordering Door Dash from a Subway you could easily walk to. I'd say get some sun but you'd probably turn to ash like a vampire.

As for me? I do something you're incapable of: putting on a show.

No one cares you're trans, Lily. Get over it. Plenty of trans people exist in online nerd culture. You can't hide from the consequences of your own words and actions by using your demographic as shield.

Pfft. They could try. Go ahead. Make videos about me. Hell, Lily, unlike you I don't even hold or delete comments. The little anklebiters who like to lecture me in my comment section don't seem to realize I'm the one allowing them to be there expressing their stupid ignorant opinions because that aligns with my principles.

Lily doesn't make a video about me because she knows I'd just react to and laugh at it. And with any luck YouTube has taken her ability to copyright strike away because she's used it maliciously 9 times.

Also retard. Just say retard, Lily. Not "tradigrade" not "child left behind" not "fetal alcohol syndrome". Just say retard.

You clearly want to. And are bitter you can't because of the insular audience you've cultivated.

This is how I know it's you because only Lily Orchard could be upset I criticized the bland Antarctica anime for being a bland Antarctica anime the sole focus of which is to get 4 teenage moeblobs on a big technical ship. Which is written by a middle aged man who does nothing but moeblob shows and directed by a woman who does nothing but moeblob shows. They both worked on No Game No Life, Lily. You know. This:

The one with the 11 year old loli in love with her step brother. Actually Lily it sounds right up your alley. You should watch it next.

Antarctica show is so full of so many plot contrivances. Why does Shirase just carry her wad of Antarctica cash everywhere and dropped it so carelessly? It's sure convenient that her and Kimari just happen to go to the same school and Kimari happens to hear her loudly wailing about the money in the bathroom. How does Hinata, a 16 year old high school drop out who works in a convenience store think she can even hope to afford this trip? Where are her parents in this anyway? We never see them.

The girls only get on the trip in the first place because another girl who is a child star vlogger just happens to be also going and just happens to contact them wanting them to go in her stead. And after making friends with them she tells her mother that she won't go without the other 3 girls but... the rest of the expedition that adamantly refused to let them on before just suddenly agrees to take them? Because this one minor celebrity and her manager mom who isn't even going said so? Takako only wanted to go to Antarctica because it just sounded neat, she's not an artic researcher, or engineer, or anything that would justify her being out there (a woman in STEM? Perish the thought says 50 year old Jukki Hanada I guess) and she died out in a blizzard trying to get a laptop to email her daughter who she has now left motherless for no good reason. And this is only ever treated as heartwarming and not idiotic.

Face it Lily. The entire show exists just to get 4 teenage girls on a big ship so otaku men can enjoy both brainless moeblobs and technical ship porn. The show sure likes to emphasize over and over how the girls are joshi kosei too. Why couldn't the show have been about the trip of the adult women (who incidentally also act like brainless teenage girls in the show)?

Yeah you guys aren't winning against me on Utena lol. Here, have my post where I have the video walking people through the episode itself. If you want to ignore the actual text of the series in order to appear morally forthright that's your own problem:

And everyone on the bus clapped, and that Asian woman's name? Albert Einstein. What does this have to do with anything except poisoning the well by linking this unsourced incident in peoples' minds to Ant and I?

Also it's Twitter. So Twitter is bad and unreasonable here, but they're not bad and unreasonable when they're squawking at me over a classic anime they've never even watched. Or squawking at Ant cause "L-L-Lily is totes a Native trans woman?? So you can't criticize any of the batshittery that spews constantly from her face hole??"

Ah now we're on to Lily's response to herself.

Oh look out Ant, Lily's got damning screenshots she just can't show anybody right now.

Probably similar to when she happily accepted a screenshot from Poppy of Poppy being creepy to Courtney and tried to blame Courtney for it.

Lily you attract attention when people talk about you because the wider nerdy internet knows your takes are insanely bad. And they know your takes are all tangled up in your personal dramas and heinous actions. They can tell. You're not as subtle as you think you are.

I cut together my response to your bad Utena takes in your 2023 Steven Universe video on a whim and slapped it on my completely unestablished personal YouTube account. It got 5k views in a few days. That's how disliked you are.

Nobody knows who I am but you sure copyright struck 4 of my livestream VODs trying to take my channel down. The 4 VODs where I most talk about your blatantly obvious incest fetish at that. Nobody knows who I am but I've gained 10k subs in 6 months primarily from dunking on you. Because I'm better at YouTube than you are.

And people do bitch at me for saying retard constantly. And you know why I keep doing it? Because the ones who most often tell me not to are some of the most annoying, entitled, self-righteous, puritanical control freaks and it's an easy way to weed them out.

By the way have fun trying to find a lawyer within 10 days who will tell you "Why yes, Lily, you can absolutely copyright these videos of yours full of footage that belong to Viacom, Netflix, Amazon, Toei Animation, Dreamworks, Activision-Blizzard, and many more!"

[rifari2037]

What’s . , your Opinion On Katara. And Aang relationship, with each other.?

Short answer :

In my opinion, Katara and Aang's relationship would more beautiful and healthy as very good friends, because they support each other way better in friendship-relationship.

Long answer :

Kat/ang as couple wasn't build up with a good storyline even from the start. Their relationship felt and looked like siblings, Katara even acted motherly to him - many proof for that and the writers said so.

So, there's no reason for me to see them as lovers in the future but just supportive good friends with a crush. But a crush - even in real life - isn't a deep feeling and it's very easy to fade away. A strong feeling needs bond, chemistry, sometimes needs twist and turns to understand each other better and strengthen the foundation of their relationship.

Katara and Aang didn't have much chemistry, just physical contact (kisses on the cheek and hugs) and blushing. But for me, chemistry is not just about physical contact, chemistry and bond is about relationship development - it's Maiko problem as well.

Actually, the writers had so many opportunities to make Katara and Aang's relationship well-written - especially since the writers worship this ship - but instead they built up the conflicts between Aang and Katara in the last few episodes.

Well, at least, Aang and Katara's conflicts was resolved in season 1, but I can say that they were forced to end up together, even though their conflict wasn't resolved in season 3.

Conflict 1 : Aang kissed Katara without consent, then Katara acted like nothing happened in the next episode.

Conflict 2 : Aang yelled at Katara, even though she wasn't mocking him like the others, and she just wanted to help him, then they separated and there wasn't even a single conversation at all until they kissed in the end of the story.

Yes, the kiss was canon, but only because the writers forced it, not because Aang and Katara - both of them - deserved it.

The writers tried hard to keep Kat/ang as the winners in post ATLA. But, the more the writers fix Kat/ang the more the writers failed to make them better in their relationship, in fact the writers even ruined some of the characters - especially my lovely Katara, whose role was increasingly decreasing.

That would happen if two characters are forced to become lovers without being built with a good storyline and the writers don't care about female characters.

I don't read the comic and I don't want to read it. But I read quite a lot of criticism about it, especially how Katara's role was nothing more than just the Avatar's girlfriend.

Also, writing them calling each other 'sweetie' all the time is so cringe. I mean, look at Suki and Sokka, most people said they were the best canon pairing, I said the same. They never called each other 'sweetie', they called each other by name and they were still romantic.

Do you know what I felt when I saw this?

Katara sat alone in the corner, looked sad watching her boyfriend having fun with his fans. I could almost feel what Katara was feeling. Katara was angry, of course, but Aang couldn't understand her feelings. In the end, Katara was the one who understood Aang and let it go. Why is it always Katara who understands Aang? She deserved an apology!

Once again, the writers tried hard to keep Kat/ang as the winners in TLOK by writing them as a married couple with three children. Avatar's girlfriend changed to avatar's wife, but the writers still failed to convince people that Kat/ang was a healthy and happy couple.

Instead, Aang was written as a bad father who only favours his air bending child, while Katara had no role, no statue to honour her, and even her grandchildren didn't recognise her.

Actually, even though I am Zutara shipper, but sometimes I'm glad that they weren't canon. I mean, the writers worship Kat/ang but they failed to convince a lot of fans how good this pair - except the shipper only.

I can't imagine Zutara was canon while the writers hated it, the would ruin Zutara badly!

And since the writers are on board in The Avatar: The Last Airbender Movie next year, I'm guessing they'll try to win Kat/ang over (again) and I wouldn't be surprised if it fails (again).

That's why I'm not waiting for the movie.

Katara and Aang don't need to be lovers to be great characters, they can have a sweet relationship as friends and family. All the crush scenes between them could be removed and it wouldn't change the storyline one bit - maybe just annoy the shippers.

NATLA proved that. Aang and Katara had a family-relationship and it was very very sweet. NATLA removed all the scenes of Aang having a crush on Katara, even the Cave of the Two Lovers scene was replaced with Sokka and Katara. Did the main storyline changed? Not at all.

I once read an opinion from a Zutara shipper. The point is, when Aang and Katara are together, Katara has to stay away from Zuko (because their chemistry is stronger). It happened in TLOK, when Katara didn't show up to her granddaughter's coronation because Zuko was there.

Meanwhile, if Zuko and Katara are together, while Aang mature enough to accept his destiny, they will be forever great friends. He also will be a very very very sweet uncle and steam babies' favourite person. It happened in Zutara fanfics and fanart.

I agree 1000000%!!