#look at how sad he looks in that one panel
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varpusvaras · 2 months ago
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Just thinking about how others reacted to Jason's death...all of the victim blaming, making him a warning, an example of what not to do, telling him he came back wrong, that he was mean and cruel and dangerous even before his death...constantly making fun of his death and making crowbar jokes and all of that...and how, in the newer runs, Jason seems to just. accept it all.
(Thinking of a scenario where Jason and Roy become friends, how Jason starts to very slowly handle his feelings around his death. How the Jason Roy knows is confident, despite everything, and even if he is angry and hurt and takes that anger and hurt out on the world around him, he still so very firmly believes in making a difference. How after some time Jason decides to try and mend things with his family.
And how slowly but surely, the Jason who Roy knew at the beginning starts to disappear.
How Jason starts to disappear.
How Jason starts believing that he should disappear.
How Jason starts to want to disappear.
And Roy starts to get angry.)
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 2 years ago
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Leave wildlife alone. He probably bites.
 [First] Prev <–-> Next
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theotherrichardpapen · 10 months ago
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...because any moment may be our last. everything is more beautiful because we're doomed.
#looking through my drafts and seeing this post unfinished and knowing in my core I'll probably never actually finish it .#but strangley enough i don't hate the way it looks with only those 2 panels ? beauty in simplicity or something idk#woe unfinished post be upon ye#honestly probably wouldnt even bother posting it were it not for the fact i was hit by a sudden wave of sadness#by being reminded out of the blue that alex really does just . lose nigel that night#enough deep level analysis my brain is all out i think . but just the simple fact that nigel dies that night#and alex has to go on for the rest of his life post-ending carrying that grief and loss with him#i know we talk about how nigel isn't truly 'gone' in the sense that they're one now and jack is supposed to be an amalgamation of the two#a product of their union and 'consummation' that night at the yard#but he's still gone . no matter how much alex might try and follow in nigel's footsteps#no matter how hard alex tries to tread that same path nigel did to feel close to him#he's gone . they will never have that moment beneath the house ever again . and alex has to go on living with that#anyway . normal again . imagine dropping a song rec like i used to. aha . go listen to sick like me by in this moment.#like minds#murderous intent#nigel colbie#alex forbes#nigel colbie x alex forbes#edit : THEY'LL NEVER HAVE THE MOMENT UNDER THE HOUSE AGAIN !!!!!#thinking about the moment where nigel sits across from alex after he shoots john#and the contrast to the scene in the crawlspace . nigel is trying to connect he is trying to get alex to see to understand#but now alex is closed off. something may be irreparable broken between them#do you think it was the moment where nigel starts to despair . to plead . realise that he needs to find a way to make alex truly see#i need to get some sleep
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martyrbat · 2 years ago
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[ID: an uncoloured drawing for a panel next to the publicized version. They're both from the comic Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight #194. In them, Batman is shown from the waist up. He's looking at Jim Gordon, who's off panel, with a penitent expression after being accused of something he secretly did do. He has his palm pressed against his chest and is blocking the bat emblem as his other hand is clasped ontop of it. In the initial drawing, there's a halo floating above his head as well as several tiny hearts mixed in with the lights that surround him. In the publicized panel, the hearts and halo has been removed and two speech bubbles have been added. He's in front of a terra rose background and is starting to say, “Jim, I don't even know what you're...” But Jim cuts him off, saying, “Stop it. I'm tired of this.”
The third photo is a description of the drawing from the artist's (Seth Fisher) website. It reads: This is another page that the DC editors changed: no halos or hearts around Batman, no matter how (disingenuously) contrite he is. In the final edition, the halo and heart in the center bottom frame have been excised.]
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itissadbutitsmy-artblog · 7 months ago
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more. i dont like making aus like this except i have to get to the end of it so itll all be rounded out. i drew a lot of these and they brought me joy
these all kinda flow into one another so they go in one post but they arent consistently colored or paneled. well who cares. i need to see them
its an alternate ending of this(x) and a continuation of this(x). i have too many comics falling around.
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clover-the-awesomest · 1 year ago
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Now we have the pages that we missed... Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
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pt.1 | pt.3 The end of ep.3 | Next episode Masterpost Would you believe me if I told you how much I love timeskips? ;-;
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coconut530 · 1 year ago
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YOU DON’T DESERVE THIS INHERITANCE 💖🥂🤬💥💖
(As much as I yell at Asha I think she’s an amazing villain so well done and complex so don’t take my yelling at her the wrong way)
#Solid State#Solid State Webtoon#Webtoon#WDYM WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT CAPS DOESN’T EVEN TO EXPRESS HOW LOUD I’M SCREAMING#OK SO UH PRAKASH THAT’S QUITE RUDE LIKE DAMN EIJI’S SWORD IS NOT EVEN HIS IT’S HER’S AND SHE’S THE ONE WHO USED IT TO KILL PRAKASH IRONYYYY#“BOO HOO IT WAS THE CULT AND THE UNION” ASHA IT WAS YOU WE ALL FREAKIN’ SAW IT#EIJI DIDN’T DO IT HE LOVED PRAKASH MORE THAN EVERYTHING DON’T BLAME HIM#HIIIIIII TANSER AND ECKER AND RAMSAY AND IOLANTHE AND AURUN AND ENZO YAYYYYYYYYYY!!!#OH MY GOD HIM YELLING AT ASHA LIKE WOW LIKE OH NO DON’T GRAB THE SWORD ASHA#HIS EYES WERE BECAUSE HE MISSED KILLING PRAKASH THAT’S CRAZY AUGH HE’S BEEN IN PAIN SINCE THEN THAT’S SO SAD#TAKEOVER SQUAD PANEL WAAAAAAAAAAA SHE’S HIS SISTER AND HE’S TRYING TO STOP HER FROM BECOMING PRAKASH#OH HI SURGE GUY WHY’RE YOU ALWAYS HERE OMG THERE ARE SO MANY PODS WITH CYBORGS WHAT#EVEN PROTECTED FROM BEING TIED BACK TO ASHA#JAMILAH DAVE REPORTER LADY CASTEL (!!!!) WATCH OUT AAAAAAAAAAAAAA#THEY’RE WEARING PINK WOW NOT WHITE#WHY’RE YOU TRYING TO BREAK ENZO I THOUGHT HE WAS UR RIGHT HAND I MEAN I KNOW U ARGUED BUT C’MON#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#WHY THEM!?!?? THEY DON’T DESERVE THIS?!??? AAAAAAAAAAAA BUTCHER AOFIE GIANNIS BRUNO I’M SO SORRY THIS HAPPENED TO YOU#EIJI ENZO RUN!! ALSO THE EYES OF THE NEXT PROTAGS YAYYY THEY LOOK SO FUN THANKS VELDENMIRE AND PANELPERDAY FOR CRAZY FIRST HALF OF SEASON
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krysmcscience · 3 months ago
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At long last: either an alternate explanation for or continuation of my prior comic regarding how Bill was ABSOLUTELY naked in Ford's karaoke night drawing. (Because errors in art do not exist. Artists do not make mistakes. So if you see any in this comic, No You Do Not.)
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I am so normal about these old dorks.
I'm not really clear on exactly when Bill started throwing his desperation book at Ford just like a needy ex do, but I find it extremely funny to imagine it happening literally the day of or after the makeshift funeral. Bill just gets this weird sense of 'Ford is taking steps to move on' and CANNOT FUCKING ABIDE.
I hope you enjoy all the goofy things I added to each page of Bill's sad spieling. (Everything SHOULD be readable so long as you view the full size, but I have added basically this whole little fanfic in the image descriptions, LMAO, which lays out all the little written notes and such.) Also don't ask how Bill managed to sneak that vampire pen in there. I have no idea, and honestly? I don't wanna know.
Oh, and a little bonus comic:
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Of course Bill would take it as flirting. Because between the two of them, Bill is the bigger masochist By Far. :)
Also I have continued applying The Good Place logic to any of Bill's attempts to swear. Case in point, one last bonus image, this time with a motivational line from my slapdash Theraprism OC, EV-01:
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Yes, its name is just 'love' backwards. No, I will not be taking any feedback on this. Yes, EV-01 was only ever assigned to Bill's case due to the Theraprism being desperate to make some progress in rehabilitating him. No, it did not work anywhere close to staff's expectations - Bill didn't even appreciate EV-01's matching fondness for bowties! (He claimed the fondness to be "cultural appropriation" and insisted he'd been traumatized by it.)
Anyway, if you like my stuff, reblogs are very much appreciated, and if you really really like it, perhaps consider my commissions or yeeting a teeny tiny tip my way? I am trying to recoup over 500 dollars in vet bills, ahaha... 🙃
In other news, I loved all the fun tags people added to the prior naked-karaoke comic (such as 'the hat and bow-tie stay ON during sex' and the classic '[insert keysmash here]', as well as the many amused/bewildered remarks about how I either made the bricks a piece of clothing or just straight up peeled Bill's skin off). However, I think my favorite thing by far was the several people losing their shit over the fact that I gave Bill toes. Like, excuse me? The magical talking triangle can have fingers but not toes??? Since when was that a rule????? 🤣 (Also the one person who reblogged with the cropped panel where Bill's fishnets pants are falling off to ask why Bill peed himself. Dude, I want to examine your brain...?)
Okie-dokie, I'm sick of looking at all of this stuff now and I'm off to go to work, after which I will either scribble some more goofy "Billford" comics or perhaps draw my lame human!Bill in Situations, idk yet. Maybe I'll even finally draw more than just a single other person's human!Bill...? Who knows, but I sure hope I can mix it up a little and not turn whatever I draw into a month-long fukken project. >:\
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mithrun-house-of-kerensil · 9 months ago
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I think about Lycion and his relationship with beauty soo much
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Looking at him, we can see that he easily meets the elven beauty standards. He has long silver hair, clear skin, and androgynous form: he's the picture of a youthful, pretty man.
And yet.
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He experiences such a visceral reaction to his own body. Despite looking like your stereotypical pretty boy, he doesn't fulfill the expectation of being vain in the slightest (at least not in this form).
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In fact, we see in the extras just how badly his body dysmorphia got to him. This was not a passive discomfort or a shallow desire. Lycion was trying to destroy his body. He hated living in his skin so much he was actively self harming in multiple ways in an effort to punish himself.
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It's not until he uses ancient magic to get his beast form that his perspective of himself changes. The magic required him to be heavily tattooed over his whole body and we can clearly we can see that he wears these marks with pride. But that's not where any of this ends for him because despite having the solution to his problem, Lycion can't be a wolf all the time.
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This means that he has to learn to cope with existing as an elf still, and what stands out to me is how Lycion's hair is almost always in his face. Even now, in the body he likes more, he hides. Whether this is a lingering discomfort or just a habit, there's no saying, but it makes me sad.
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Especially in this panel, where it's clear that a lot of his hair had been pulled forward to cover his face rather just the few strands. His expression looks so hollow. He looks tired and uncomfortable. This isn't the casual playfulness he usually has. I think this is a peek into the idea that it's very self soothing for him to use his hair as a shield when he's forced to stay in his human body for too long.
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I think that his hair is so important to him because we can see that it's the only trait that carried over into his wolf form. This means that when he's forced to be human he can cling to the single part of him that's shared between his current body and his preferred one.
In summary: I love him so much
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lynxgriffin · 7 months ago
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Eldritchrune - Dreemurr of Jokes
1 | 2 | 3
Story Setup Eldritchrune Masterpost
Toriel stops by Sans' shop for some goods, and for some more cheery distractions! Unfortunately, all this time later, it's still too difficult to escape reminders of what's been done.
It was fun finally getting to do some stuff with Sans in this universe! The last part for this trio of scenes will be up sometime next week!
Alt text for these pages is under the read more:
Page 1 Panel 1: Interior shot of a small store, with displays of goods, loose plywood, sacks of things. Two circular woven hangings bracket the door through which Toriel enters, a heavyset woman in a polka-dotted dress with a basket over her arm. Sans watches her enter, though we see only the back of his head. 
Panel 2: Toriel enters the shop and we see more displays, mostly food. There are large potted trees as well, and the shop’s counter, draped in patterned cloth and decorated with candles. Toriel: “Well, hello again. I was wondering if you had-” Sans, a jovial, bearded man dressed in loose robes and always smiling, waves a hand and cuts her off. “Hold on, you hear that?”
Panel 3: “...Hear what?” Toriel asks, nonplussed. Up close, her face is soft but distressed.
Panel 4: Sans leans over his slightly messy counter, still grinning. “I HERB that you needed some more cinnamon cloves, and look what I have here!” He offers a handful of herbs. Up close, the cuffs on his robe sleeves are patterned with little bones.  
Panel 5: “Just what I needed! How did you guess?” Toriel exclaims, reaching out with a real smile to accept the herbs. She and Sans are framed by other mysterious shop wares- jars of things, open sacks, rolled-up mats. Things you might find in an open-air desert market. 
Page 2 Panel 1: Sans: “Was just thinking it’d been awhile since I saw you making the neighborhood rounds with some of those pies of yours… Figured you were planning to start this month’s soon!” Sans gestures up at Toriel in explanation. 
Panel 2: Toriel smirks, setting down a handful of coins.  “And perhaps hoping that I would stop by your place first with them?” Sans: “I pride myself on my forward thinking, y’know.” His grin is conspiratorial as he leans towards her and he taps his temple with one finger. 
Panel 3: Toriel, eyes sad despite her smile: “All right. How about this: Tell me a good joke, and you have my word you will have the first and freshest one.”
Panel 4: Sans: “Just a good joke?” He raises an eyebrow. 
Panel 5: Toriel clutches her chest- we don’t see her eyes. “I find myself in desperate need of levity these days.” 
Panel 6: Sans waves his hand as if to keep her from feeling like she need say more, scratching his chin in thought with the other.  “Sure, I got one…” 
Page 3 Panel 1: Sans, with the smug grin of someone about to tell a terrible pun: “Why was the empire soldier happy to get demoted to horse groomer?” Toriel, with her hand on her chin in thought: “I do not know, why?” 
Panel 2: Sans shrugs widely like the answer is obvious. “Because he finally had STABLE employment!” 
Panel 3: Toriel laughs in genuine delight, although maybe a little harder than expected. 
Panel 4: Toriel: “Thank you, I needed that.” She smiles a relieved little smile. Sans: “No problem. So hey, aside from the pie… Can I maybe get an invite to those little get-togethers I see some folks around here doing once a month?” He steeples his fingertips together. 
Panel 5: San’s dialogue continues: “I’m so curious as to what goes on then!” We only see Toriel, though, shocked and dismayed. She’s thinking of the Ritual gatherings- townspeople gathered in their robes and animal masks- reindeer, fish, but most centrally, the goat masks she and Asgore wear. 
Panel 6: Toriel: “Unless you are completely enraptured by tedious talk of planting schedules and building repairs, I believe I can sate your curiosity by saying you would find them quite boring.” She waves a hand in front of her, dismissing the thought- her expression is once again drawn and weary. 
Page 4 Panel 1: Toriel turns to leave, waving goodbye. “You should look forward to your well-earned pie more!” 
Panel 2: Sans gives her a slightly skeptical look. “Alright.” is all he says. 
Panel 3: As she leaves, Toriel looks down and sees for the first time a small statue set by the door, surrounded by candles- it’s not a merchandise display, more like an altar. The statue is a horned figure holding a bowl filled with greenery- an offering of some type. The figure is rounded like a sitting child, and simple, with closed eyes and little other detail. 
Panel 4: Toriel’s dialogue over a close up shot of the figure: “What an interesting little figure you have. It does not look like it is for sale, is it?” The little horned one has three toes and four fingers on its stubby little arms and legs, and a detail on its forehead that could be a suggestion of hair, or it could be a symbol. The pillar candles surrounding it have been burned enough to have long wax drips pooled around them. 
Panel 5: Sans: “Nah, that’s just a holdover from my home country. Supposed to help keep demons out of your space.” He seems uninterested in this bit of lore, but Toriel, still facing away, is wide-eyed and shaken.
Panel 6: Toriel whirls back to him, sweating. “I-Is that so?” 
Panel 7: Sans’s expression intensifies, eyebrows dropping dramatically. “Sure thing. You know what happens when demons get in your grain stores?” 
Page 5 Panel 1: “They’re OATsolutely RYE-ined!” Sans holds his hands wide, like he’s waiting for the rimshot effect. It’s almost like his shop counter and back wall are suddenly a stage. 
Panel 2: Toriel hides a giggle behind her hand, relieved. 
Panel 3: “Is that something you have had to deal with previously?” she asks, stepping a little closer in her interest. Sans makes a slight gesture of dismissal. “Nah, I don’t really go in for that sort of stuff, honestly.”
Panel 4: Sans: “My brother, though… He’s all in on charms and wards and that sort of thing.” He gestures up, as if to point to wherever it is in the town that his brother might be now. 
Panel 5: “Keeping customs from your home country, I suppose?” Toriel asks, drawn again into the shop and closer to Sans. “Something like that,” he responds, leaning forward on his counter. On the wall next to him, there’s another woven wall hanging like the ones over the door.  Toriel: “Do you have any customs that have a reverse effect?” 
Panel 6: Sans looks as skeptical as one can while constantly grinning. “You mean like, if you want demons in your house?” 
Page 6 Panel 1: Toriel puts a hand up in denial. “N-No, that would obviously be undesirable! I meant more… just out of curiosity about your home.” 
Panel 2: Sans stares up at her, for a beat of silence. 
Panel 3: “Maybe? Again, this stuff isn’t my thing.” He leans back in his chair with his hands behind his head, nonchalant as can be. “And anyways, we left our country for a reason. Old customs aren’t relevant in this town, y’know?” 
Panel 4: Toriel once again turns to go, with a rueful smile. “Maybe not… but I cannot imagine letting go of your entire history.”
Panel 5: Sans shrugs and looks away. “There’s worse things to let go of, honestly.” 
Panel 6: Toriel, gritting her teeth, thinks of a happier time tucking Kris into bed. 
Panel 7: Close on Toriel’s expression, now more haggard and pained than it was when she came in. She clutches her chest tight. 
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florida3exclamationpoints · 2 years ago
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Just finalized my plans for the convention............ it's a travesty
#i was hoping that since i couldn't go woth my friends hopefully me and my brother could go and at least see David Tennants q&a#well. day passes for tomorrow are sold out. (they weren't yesterday so i thought it would be fine)#they have after dark passes that get you in at 3 until everything is over and they have events going on till like 2am#but guess when David Tennants q&a is. 11am#so my last hope of anything i wanna see is John Barrowmans q&a which starts at 3 so we'll have to rush#and getting David Tennants autograph#i could also get a pic with him but that makes me anxious#i really wish it didn't tho 😭#im nervous to get his autograph too tho like???? he does personalized ones so ill have to tell him how to spell my name skdhks#but the website also didn't give times for the autographs? i assume he's at the booth unless he's doing something else????#but when does he leave the booth????#so. me and my brother bought the after 3pm passes#we're planning on rushing to John Barrowmans q&a and hopefully i can get David's autograph too#i could have bought the pass to get my autograph now but idk if he's still gonna be there????#but i can still buy them at the stand tomorrow#there's a few panels that look interesting enough that if we're already there it might be worth it to stay#they have a 2000s emo dance party at midnight lol#and a calm coloring hour at 6#so ig we'll just see how it goes#im really sad ive missed everything that was at the top of my list tho#ik id regret it if i didn't go since i have the opportunity#i kinda wish i was bringing something more than an autograph home especially since im missing David's q&a#but the only other thing is a pic. which would be really cool. IF i wasn't scared#but like??? what do i say to this man???? how do i pose???? WHAT IF I LOOK BAD IN THE PICTURE???????#so :( everything ive missed out on sucks but hopefully it ends up being fun tomorrow#doctor who#david tennant#john barrowman
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littlelightfish · 9 months ago
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Holm nation... I have a heartbreaking announcement to make.
We didn't get to see this panels animated.
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(I wanted to see Laios helping him, this one isn't the one this post is all about)
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I feel it's important to his character enough that Kui decided to dedicate three panels about how he aproaches and resurrects Kabru.
He is used to resurrecting people, his party sucks at keeping themselves alive. He walks up to Kabru's corpse with a worried look on his face. Then he kneels besides him and takes a second to process what he is seeing. He is seeing a young man, Kabru, dead. It makes him feel unseasy, a bit of shock that he can't take the luxury of process at the moment. He doesn't want to look, so he closes his eyes and focuses on his spell. He is realizing he is the only one alive from his party (he doesn't know where Mick is or how he is). He is the last one standing. The reality of it all slaps him in the face.
The panel of him just... looking at the mess Kabru's corpse is was just... It was important. It talked about him as a character. "I'm not doing this because I want to, but because I have to". He doesn't has time for emotions. He has a job to do.
It's just three panels. But they provide lots of context between the ones that came before and after.
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He doesn't just rubs Kabru's head because he's being afective. He does it because he cares. He does it out of relief. "As long as I'm here, any of you'll be dying soon. And I'll always be here. Don't worry." He is far from being OK after all this. Marillier died, Daya died, Kuro died, Kabru died, Rin died, Mick probably died too (but he doesn't saw it). He... By the time he was the only one standing, the fight was over, and he could alredy resurrect them. He wants to feel sad. To worry, to be concerned, to mourn. But he can't. It isn't necessary.
He is a cleric. He for sure has a notion of dead way different than anyone and feels a certain way about resurrection. "Dying is dying, even if you resurrect." It's a bug at the corner of his mind, he doesn't pay it any attention. He gets resurrected multiple times, he is gratefull he is alive. But seeing all his friends dead? And the most of them mutilated? Covered in their own blood? He has this desire to mourn. To cry the loss. To panic. "They are all dead."
He knows they'll come back. He has to make them come back. So he does. And they are alive. But they weren't a few seconds ago. And he just plays it off, he puts his calm face on as soon as there is another party member alive that could ask him what happened that it disturbed him so much. He throws all those sad feelings under the rug and focuses at the task at hand.
They're going to be ok, he just has to do his job: bring them back from death. They shouldn't even be dead. But they are. And he's going to fix it. No point on feeling sad about them dying if they can be alive soon!
I think the concern that the anime puts here it's something that could come close to what he feels inside. Those seconds are the only ones we see him looking something akin to worried for his friends.
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But then...
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His worry vanishes in seconds. The moment Kabru revives, he does it in such a "Kabru" way, that he tells himself: "This is fine, they're going to be back soon, nothing to worry about, I just have to hurry". He wants them all back to live. We know for sure that in his priority list there wasn't any "reviving Toshiro's party members first". He was going to make sure all his party, all his friends, were alive before even thinking of resurrecting other people if he still had the magic.
Those three panels they didn't animate are something that was there for a reason. To give depth to Holm. This last episode is definitely the one in wich he shines the most. He isn't the main character at all this episode, but he does the most important stuff on the background. He revives them all. This all lack of something if you don't show what Kuy drew on those panels.
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Here he just... goes to work. He says: "lemme handle it" and he does. No concern, no worry, no, nothing. He just does. No thoughts.
It makes me sad. Those panels were important. :(
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darkbluekies · 3 months ago
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Dr kry x nurse reader
Like imagine nurse reader was college student wanted to be a nurse to learn some medicine or help people sick and taking care old people
Sea sick
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Doctor!yandere OC x nurse!reader
Summary: being the only one to be granted as Dr Kry’s apprentice on board a hospital ship ends in tragedy
Warning: yandere, sinking ships (fictional ship and incident), poisoning, indirect killing, mentions of dead bodies and autopsies, blood, sharp objects
Word count: 8k
A/N: a lot of people hav wanted a story where darling is a nurse and I have tried writing it so many times over a year, but haven't been able yo. So I tried changing location and it seemed to work, so it is not exactly what was asked, but I hope that it is enjoyable anyway!
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He stands on the promenade deck, watching out over the harbor, breathing in the fresh air. People carried on stretchers catch his eyes. 
He used to get sea sick during his first weeks out at sea. There was something about how the ship rocked back and forth during the stormy days that made his stomach turn inside out and want to eject the food he had eaten. But now that he's been here for three months, it's barely noticeable. He hasn't thrown up for three weeks. A new record. 
He has grown to like the rocking motion of the sea, but doesn’t care much for the people he shares the ship with. The female nurses try to invite him into their cabins, the male nurses fight over who will be his apprentice and the doctors either watch him with jealousy or ignore him. It’s only for a few more months, until he has saved up enough money. Until everything is over. 
They’ve just picked up a town hall full amount of wounded soldiers and new nurses. Doctor Kry has heard that his new trainee will be among them. He scans the crowd of people walking towards the gangway, trying to guess which one will be his to deal with. He hopes that they are obedient — he has no interest in scolding them — and that they aren’t stupid. 
“Watching the fresh blood?” a voice asks. 
He turns to the side to see one of the other doctors coming out to look at the new herd. Doctor Hart is an asshole, always in everyone’s business. One could almost think that he was getting paid for it. 
“You could say that”, Doctor Kry replies shortly. 
“How many dead, do you think?”
Doctor Kry let his eyes wander over the crowd below. 
“Fifty, maybe”, he says. 
It’s a cruel game, he knows that, to guess how many won’t survive the trip to the mainland. But he doesn’t know how to converse with the other doctors unless he joins in on their sad games. 
Sometimes, he plays with the nurses out on deck. There’s all sorts of games tucked away in boxes, ready to be taken out whenever.
“I heard that your trainee will be among those”, Doctor Hart says and nods down at the group of waiting people. “Who’s the lucky one?”
“I don’t know”, Doctor Kry replies shortly and stops leaning on the railing. “I should go find out.”
He doesn’t wait to hear the reply. He’s not sure where to go for his trainee to find him, but he decides to go to his cabin — if not to be at a static place, then to get away from everyone. Him getting a trainee must be the only hot topic they have. 
He navigates the white naked steel corridors to get to his cabin. It’s hard to believe that this naked ship should be covered with polished oak panels, golden details and expensive paintings. None of that can be afforded to be lost, in case the ship is sunk. 
They have lifeboat drills every morning to make sure that everyone on board knows what to do. Since they rotate staff often, those drills need to be done. They’re boring, but handy. 
The ship is nothing more than an empty shell of what she’s supposed to be, stripped of anything that gives her personality. All that’s left is bare necessities, nothing for pleasure.
He opens his door and walks in. The room is small and only contains a bed and a desk, the walls bare steel. It has a rectangular window overlooking the forecastle and he can’t help but think that he has gotten one of the best cabins on the ship. He knows that doctors, officers — both military and ship — and a handful of passengers, get better cabins than  the wounded or nurses. 
Doctor Kry sits down by the table and opens his notebook to write. He has time to finish two pages before there is a knock on the door. It’s a drastic knock, as if the person on the other side of the door is either nervous or eagerly excited. He stands up, not knowing what to expect as he opens the door. Outside stands a young thing, with their hands clasped in front of them. You take him by surprise. You’re not what he expected — but then again, what had he been expecting?
“Are you Doctor Kry?” you ask. 
“Yes, I am”, he replies. 
“I’m told that I am your apprentice.”
He lets his eyes wander over you. You seem so … small? You’re younger than he had thought, and there’s something naive about you. He can’t help but wonder what events has led you to end up here. 
He realizes that he can’t have you standing out in the corridor forever and steps aside, gesturing for you to come in. You walk past him into the small room and look around. 
“You have a better cabin than I do”, you say with a small — nervous — laugh, as if to bring some kind of humanity into the conversation. It’s as if you want to skip right past the awkward small talk. You grimace. “I have to share a cabin with five others. We only have a small porthole.”
Doctor Kry closes the door. 
“What’s your name?” he asks. 
“Oh, sorry”, you reply quickly, eyes widening with realization. “Y/N.”
Doctor Kry can’t help but tug at the corner of his lips. 
“Are you always this light-headed, Y/N?” he asks.
You look down in embarrassment. 
“No, doctor”, you say. “I am just nervous. I haven’t done anything like this before. Sorry, doctor.”
“Sit down.”
You look around for somewhere to sit and end up on his neatly fixed bed. Doctor Kry sits down on his chair by his desk. You fiddle with your hands in your lap as your eyes follow him. 
“You’re going to be my trainee, which means that you have to listen to me at all times”, Doctor Kry says. “The medical field is a profession that requires precision. One faulty move and someone could die. Is that clear?”
“Yes, doctor.”
“I’m responsible for you, so I don’t want you doing anything stupid, do you get that? No breaking rules, no stupid behavior.”
“Yes, doctor.”
He stretches his neck. 
“This doesn’t have to do with you but I will tell you this anyway, in case it should occur”, he says stiffly. “If any of the other nurses give you any trouble, you’ll come tell me right away, understood?”
“Yes doctor”, you reply. 
“Good. In that case, let's get started. A lot of people have boarded the ship today, and we need to check up on them. You might have thought that you’d get a day to settle in, but that’s not how we do things here. On board, things can happen at any hour of the day and you need to be prepared.”
You nod. 
“Good”, he says, pleased. “Let’s go then, we have work to do.”
When he stands, so do you. He walks towards the door and so do you. You follow him through the corridors like a puppy, in silence. You don’t say anything. Maybe this will work for him after all?
You come out to the main staircase, a pathetic excuse of what it should be, and walk up a flight of stairs. What should be the lounge is now an operating theater and bedroom to wounded soldiers. He can hear you draw a breath as you walk in. The smell must hit you, he guesses, the smell of pain and blood. 
You follow him around the open room as he talks to different men and women who have all kinds of painful injuries and sickness symptoms. You’re quiet behind him. When he’s done with his round, he takes you out onto the promenade to get you some fresh air. You hold onto the wooden railing. 
“That can be unpleasant”, he says, leaning onto the railing beside you with his elbows. “Especially if it is one's first time. You’ll get used to it.”
“I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to expect”, you reply. “I knew that it would be … bad … I just didn’t know what type. Tomorrow will be better. Now I know what to expect.”
You give him a small smile. Don’t give up on me yet, I will prove myself to you. You are weirdly cute. 
“Why are you here if you lack so much experience?” he asks.
“Good question”, you sigh. “Money problems, I suppose. My family has it rough.”
“How long will you be here?”
“A few months, until I've saved enough money.”
Doctor Kry nods. “Same here.”
“Is life on board tiresome?” you wonder. “What do you do out on sea?”
“Some play deck games, some write, draw or read”, Doctor Kry says. “Some spend time with the wounded. Everyone comes up with different activities.”
“I would like to explore the ship, see what the home I will have for the coming months contains.”
“If you want I can give you a tour.”
“Really? Thank you, I would love that.”
You follow the doctor inside again. He decides to start from the bottom of the beast and show you up to the very top.
The orlop deck is the one right above the boilers. The two of you shouldn't wander further below, in case of danger. The orlop deck contains a mailroom and the cargo hold. It's chilly inside the ominous cargo room. Wooden boxes stand in groups.
“These contain everything from weapons to medical equipment to food and alcohol”, Doctor Kry says and taps the top of a wooden box. “Some people — of the military staff, I've been told — sneak down here to steal some of it. I wouldn't advise you to explore down here. The ones you'll meet will most likely be drunk beyond measure and not trustable.”
“I understand”, you say.
“That being said, let's go upstairs.”
G-deck is filled with bunk beds, rows and rows of them. Walls that used to separate cabins have been demolished and left are the marks on the floors where they should stand. People are in bed, either sleeping or chatting with each other. They’re wearing bandage.
F-deck was the same as G-deck, filled with bunk beds and cabins. 
E-deck has a pool with crystal clear water. It’s a simple pool, only there for exercise. It used to have much more detailing, a children’s part of the pool and some children’s floating toys. 
“It would be nice to swim here”, you say. “After long hours of standing.”
“I think it is nice”, Doctor Kry says. “I haven’t used the pool yet. I think it’s seawater but, like I said, I haven’t tried the pool yet.”
Before he has time to think, you’ve crouched down, sunk your cupped hand into the water and taken a lick. Doctor Kry gasps and twitches forward.
“What are you doing?” he questions. 
“It is seawater”, you say. 
He grabs your wrist, pulls you up on your feet and shakes your hands free of the water.
“That is disgusting, do not do that again”, he says sternly.
You laugh slightly, meeting his eyes. Doctor Kry shakes his head, but has to restrain himself to not smile. 
“Get out”, he says, nodding at the door. 
You walk before him. Your youthful behavior is going to wear him down. 
D-deck has more dim corridors than the others you’ve explored. Doctor Kry stops in front of a steel door with his hand resting on the handle. 
“This room is the morgue”, he says slowly. “I don’t expect you to like this room, but I do expect you to treat it with respect. Don’t do anything ‘fun’ here, like you did in the pool. Understood?”
You nod. Doctor Kry opens the door. A chilly wind blows through you. You hug yourself. The room is colder than the winds up on deck and you look at Doctor Kry to see if he’s also feeling the cold. Along the walls of the room are numbered hatches. You don’t need him to explain what is inside them. Doctor Kry opens a door to the right, showing a small room with an operating table on it. 
“Have you ever performed an autopsy?” you ask. 
“Many times”, he responds and closes the door. 
“Do they get … easier every time?”
“Easier? I wouldn’t say easier, but you learn to shut off your brain. You’ll learn that too while working here.”
He walks you out of the morgue. D-deck also contains even more wards. 
C-deck has the first class dining saloon, now nothing more than a school cafeteria. The tables are simple, the chairs looking uncomfortable. A few men sit by a table eating. Doctor Kry is quick to get you out. 
B-deck has more cabins and open wards, along with an enclosed promenade deck filled with beds, where patients can rest in fresh air. There’s nothing left of the verandah cafe, the suites have been emptied and the hairdresser doesn’t have the equipment that it once had. 
A-deck is the only deck on the ship left with some of her old personality. The lounge has some armchairs and couches and the smoking room still has the painted glass windows. You look at the painted mermaid on the window. 
“It’s beautiful”, you say. 
“It is”, Doctor Kry says. “I think it has something to do with Greek mythology, but I haven’t asked.”
The enclosed promenade deck the two of you had been on is on the same deck. Boat deck, on the other hand, has nothing enclosed. Nothing to shield anyone from wind or rain. Rows upon rows of lifeboats stand in their davits, collapsible ones are positioned on the roofs for easy access. 
“Okay, I think you’ve seen it all”, Doctor Kry says and sighs. “Not much, as you can see. Majority of it have been removed in case anything would happen to the ship.”
“Is there a risk of something happening?”
“The ship is painted white with a green line and big, red crosses. People know better than to sink a hospital ship.”
“But at night you can’t see what color the ship is painted.”
“I assure you that has been thought of. I will show you. Meet me at my cabin at sunset.”
“Okay.”
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You knock at his door as the sun is resting on the horizon. Doctor Kry stands up from his chair a bit too quickly.
“Good evening”, you say. “I’m here.”
“So you are”, he replies and grabs his beige coat. “Let’s go, we can get dinner afterwards.”
You follow him out to the main staircase and up to the boat deck. The red shade above you is fading into dark blue skies. Wherever you look, nothing breaks it. You follow Doctor Kry to the stern where you have a good view of the ship. A strand of green light lights up the side of the ship, big spotlights turned to the red crosses. The green light gives your face a magical shade, one which makes the doctor stare at you when you’re not looking. 
“You can sleep soundly”, he says. “As you can see, there are lights showing other ships what we are. Now, how about some food?”
“Yes, please.”
The two of you walk back inside and make your way down to the dining hall. You don’t say anything, but the way your hand travels the railing down the main staircase makes him smile. 
You get a bowl of soup and a piece of bread. Doctor Kry leads you to a table full of doctors where he always sits. Not because he likes their company, but because he doesn’t want to sit with the immature nurses. 
“So this is your apprentice?” Doctor Hart says, eyeing you. 
“Yes”, Doctor Kry replies. 
You sit down beside him. 
“I’m Y/N”, you say, remembering how you had forgotten to introduce yourself to Kry earlier. “
“You are a voluntary nurse, right?” a doctor asks. 
“Yes.”
“What training do you have?”
“The absolute minimum, sir. I didn't have time to learn more before being sent here.”
“That’s why they’re my apprentice”, Doctor Kry says before anyone else has time to say something that could invalidate your lack of knowledge. “I’m supposed to train them.”
“You have gotten an unfortunate fit, Y/N”, Doctor Hart says jokingly. “Kry is a good doctor, but probably the most boring man I have ever come across.”
You frown, looking between him and your mentor. 
“I wouldn’t say that”, you say slowly. 
Doctor Kry looks at you with a small smile before taking a bite of his sandwich. 
“If you ever get tired of this boring man, I could always use a trainee”, Doctor Hart says with a small smirk. 
The other doctors laugh. You give them a small, uncomfortable smile.
“Let them be”, Doctor Kry says warningly. “You don't have to be an ass to the newcomers.”
He turns away from them, looking at you. 
“Don’t listen to them”, he whispers.
“Okay”, you reply quietly and give him a thankful smile.
He spends the rest of the dinner conversing with you, completely ignoring the other doctors. He asks you about your family life, the members in it, what your favorite memory is. For the first time in months, he's had a purposeful conversation, one he won't forget the second he leaves the dining hall. You've only been here less than a day and yet you've managed to put color in this white steel beast.
“I shouldn't keep you”, he says suddenly. “I suppose that you're tired. You should rest. I will see you tomorrow morning. Will you find your way to your cabin?”
“I think so”, you smile. “Thank you.”
“Be at my door at seven tomorrow morning.”
You nod. Doctor Kry gives you a small nod before walking away. His heart pounds in his chest, already looking forward to tomorrow morning.
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Days go by. You spend every waking hour with your mentor, following him like a dog. You don't get why everyone else calls him strict, why some pity you for having him. And some pity themselves for not being picked. It's a weird feeling, you find, that everyone has a divided opinion of you and you have no idea who thinks what. All eyes on you, and none seem to be in your favor.
Doctor Kry is awoken by knocking on his door. Still in his drowsy state can he recognize the pattern. You have a unique sense of knocking. The darkness still covers the sky.
You're standing outside, wet to the bone, wearing your pajamas and a guilty look in your eyes.
“You told me to tell you right away”, you say quickly. “I'm not sure if you meant that literally but … I have nowhere else to go.”
Your voice dies out. Doctor Kry frowns, looking at your wet form up and down.
“What happened?” he asks suspiciously.
“They locked me out.”
“What are you talking about? Who locked you out?”
“The other nurses.”
What?
“Why are you wet?”
“They threw water on me and threw me out of the room. I-I guess that it was a joke but … I didn’t really … find it funny …”
He can tell that you're shivering, although you're trying your best not to show it. It makes him unexplainably furious.  
“Come inside”, he says and steps aside.
He's quick to grab his towel from his trunk and wrap it around you. You sit down on his chair.
“Did they say anything to you?” he asks. 
“Not from what I heard”, you reply quietly, shaking slightly. “Everything went on so quickly. I barely had time to wake up before I found myself in the corridor.”
“They threw you?” Doctor Kry asks, trying to understand. 
“Grabbed me by my arms and threw me out.”
“You must have hit the opposite wall in the corridor.”
“It’s fine.”
He feels his heart tug. His poor little apprentice, getting thrown around like trash. He knew that the nurses were assholes, but he is appalled that none of them even tried to befriend you. He knows that it’s because of him. In some way shape or form, it always leads back to him. It’s his responsibility to take care of you now. And, like hell, he’ll do it.
“Let’s get you out of those wet clothes to start with”, he says and removes the towel from around your body. “You’ll get sick if you keep them on any longer.”
He helps you remove them and dress you in his spare pajamas, offering you his bed. 
“Don’t go back to that room”, he says. 
“Why?”
“I feel like I am responsible for you and that’s why I can’t let you back there.”
“What do I do then?”
It’s such a simple question, but it makes him feel even more determined to take care of you. You’re asking him how to proceed. You trust him enough to let him decide what should happen to you. It’s enough to make him hear his heart in his ears. 
“You’ll stay here for the night, and I will decide what to do with you in the morning”, he says and removes the cover of the bed. “Why don’t you go to bed while I get you a hot cup of tea?”
“Okay, thank you, doctor”, you say quietly. 
“Of course.”
He smiles as he walks out, but the second he closes the door he feels a pain in his heart. He has been with you for two weeks by now and every day has been a pleasure. He can’t remember the last time he’s been this excited to work. Every meal, he spends it with you. He plays deck games with you on your breaks and play board games in the lounge at night. You’re interesting to him without being annoying. Everyone else gets on his nerves, being too much, too loud, too clingy and too … much. You, somehow, seem to be just perfect in every category. It’s such a rare trait for him to find. He doesn’t care that no one else understands it —  on the contrary, he finds it great that he is the only one you spend your time with — but he hates that the others are childish enough to mess with you because of it. 
Sea air must bring even the sanest people to madness. 
The morgue flashes before his eyes and he stops right in his tracks. He wants to. Oh, how he wants to. But there’s no way that he could play it off. On a secluded place like a ship, there was no place to hide a crime. Nowhere to flee if he did get caught. He’ll figure it out, though. They won’t go unpunished. 
He gets the cup of tea and makes his way back to the cabin.
“Drink this”, he says and holds the cup to your lips. “This should warm you up.”
He notices how you’re trying to take the cup from him, but he won't let you. Wants to feed you. You drink slowly. 
“What do I do from now on?” you ask. 
“Well, firstly, I will talk to your roommates”, the doctor says. “Tomorrow morning. You can take my bed, I will sleep on the floor.”
“No, I can’t do that. I’ve troubled you enough, doctor.”
He doesn’t answer. Instead, he tucks you in and opens his trunk to take out a shirt to use as a pillow. 
“Doctor, please”, you say. “I can take the floor.”
“Don’t be absurd. Enough of this, now go to sleep.”
There’s no use in fighting him, he will not budge. You try to lay as still as you can, but it’s hard to drift off to sleep. You’re unaware that Kry is awake as well, having an even harder time getting some rest. The only thing he can think of is how angry he is at those nurses … but also a particular happiness. They sent you his way. In an unofficial way they sent you right into his clutches. 
The very next morning, he awakens to find you there, in his bed, sleeping peacefully. He stares at you. There is something so heavenly about you. Something alive, among all this death and suffering. 
He changes into his uniform before walking through the ominous corridors of your room. His knock must have echoed in the room because he can hear a few surprised gasps.
He recognizes the tired face that opens.
“If you don't mind, I'll grab Y/N’s things”, he says and, before waiting for a response, pushes past into the room, hitting their shoulder intentionally. “Where are they?”
“Under that bunk bed.”
He follows the pointed finger and grabs a brown bag. 
“You should be ashamed of yourselves, you know”, he says without changing his normal calm tone. “I thought nurses were supposed to be caring, but what do I know? I never spend time with them. And now I see that it was with good reason.”
“What makes you so special?” one of the nurses scoffs. “There are a lot of doctors people would choose before you too.”
“I'm aware of that, and I'm very thankful for it. But you shouldn't forget that there is a hierarchy on board. I might not fall for your charms, but I can still get you downgraded to kitchen staff.”
He walks out. You're still sleeping when he returns to his cabin and he decides to go get you breakfast.
“Wake up”, he says and places the tray on the desk. “I've gotten you breakfast.”
“Really?” you ask and sit up. “Thank you so much. And thank you for letting me stay here.”
He doesn’t answer. Instead, he gives you a cup of coffee. 
“I brought your things”, he says. “I don’t think that you should go back to that room at all. I will try to get you into another cabin.”
“Oh”, you say. “Thank you.”
“You say awfully many ‘thank you’s.”
“Well, you do awfully many nice things for me.”
He tries not to show how happy he gets, but his ears burn a crimson red. You get out of bed and walk over to your bag, looking around for something. 
“I want to give you something”, you say and hold your hands behind your back. 
“What?” asks. 
You take out a little porcelain dog, a spitting image of a Golden Retriever. 
“I don’t have much”, you say, “but I really value this little thing. Take it.”
“No”, Doctor Kry says simply. 
“I don’t have anything else.”
“Which is why I can’t take it.”
“Please?”
He looks at the little dog in your hands and the pleading look in your eyes. His hand reach out and take it in his hand, knowing that he won’t keep it. He will find a way to give it back to you at a later time. But he has to accept it for now so that you don’t feel stupid. 
He places it on his desk and gives you the cup of coffee again. 
“What will we work with today?” you ask. 
“We’re picking up some new people.”
Everytime they pick up new people, he’s reminded of your limited time. One day, sooner than desired, you will walk off the gangway … and someone will take your place. No. Never. He doesn't want anyone else other than you.
Among the newcomers, you find a child. The six year old boy seems to like running along the big ship's decks. 
You and Kry observe him from the promenade boat above.
“Why is there a child?” you ask. “Isn’t it dangerous to let a little boy run around?”
“His parents must either be military, a nurse or wounded”, Doctor Kry replies.
You let go of the railing. Doctor Kry follows you with his eyes as you make your way down to the boy. You introduce yourself, take his little hand and ask him for his. Nicholas. You play with him. Doctor Kry can’t look away. You’re a natural with children. The little boy seems to have genuinely fun with you. You’re running along the deck, back and forth. You pretend to have a hard time catching up with him, making Doctor Kry smile. He’s not much for children. They’re loud, unpredictable and lack consequence-think. He hates all of it. But you seem to have a natural talent for it. The boy seem so comfortable with you. It’s adorable. 
“Doctor!” you shout. 
“What?” he replies without raising his voice. 
“Come down, let’s play something!” 
He sighs and lets go of the railing before making his way down to you and Nicholas. 
“This is doctor Kry”, you tell the boy. “He won’t bite you.”
“Bite?” Doctor Kry scoffs. “Since when have I ever bitten someone?”
“That’s what I’m saying — you won’t bite him.”
“I never bite to begin with.”
“That’s what I’m saying, so what are you arguing about?”
“Y/N- … nevermind, I’m getting nowhere.”
You laugh. He shakes his head disapprovingly, but his heart aches fondly. You’re like an annoying fly buzzing around, but he doesn’t want to kill you. 
You play curling on the deck and you throw lamely to let the little boy win. He tries to match it, tries to follow your lead. 
The image doesn’t leave his brain for the rest of the day. The only thing he sees is you with the little boy. 
“Doctor, be careful!”
He doesn’t notice how he’s slipped with the scalpel and cut himself in the palm. With a hiss, he backs away from the man on the operating table. You grab his other arm and pulls him with you. His head is awfully cloudy. The only thing he sees in front of him is your smile when you played with the boy. 
“Sit here”, you say and place him down on a chair. “Are you okay?”
“Yes … yes, I’m fine”, he says and clears his throat. 
You clean his hand and wrap it in bandage. Your touch makes him want to pass out. But it also makes him want to yell in frustration. How could he slip up that easily? He has never been distracted during an autopsy and suddenly seeing you with a child puts him out of balance enough for him to slip the knife?
“You need to be careful”, you tell him.
“I know”, he sighs, rolling his eyes. “I don’t enjoy hurting myself.”
“I didn’t mean that, I know you’re careful, I just-”
He realizes that he’s made a mistake. 
“I know”, he says, cutting you of before sighing heavily and continuing in defeat. “I didn’t mean to sound mad. I’m not angry with you.”
He could never be. If anything, he’s furious at himself. 
“It’s okay”, you say gently. 
You let go of his bandaged hand. 
“It should be okay now”, you say. “But I don’t think that you should go back.”
“I won’t”, he says. “They need a steady hand and clearly my isn’t.”
“Don’t be hard on yourself, doctor. It happens to the best of us.”
He sighs and stands up, keeping his eyes on a point above your head. 
“Let’s go out”, he says stiffly and clenches his jaw. “I need air.”
“Do you want to be alone?” you ask. 
His reply comes short. “Just come.”
You nod and hurry after him out on deck. His entire body screams anger. You don’t dare to open your mouth, scared to upset him even more. Instead, you follow him like a shadow around the promenade deck. He suddenly stops and looks at you, as if he just only realized that you are still here. You back away a few steps to give him space. He flinches forward, as if his body wants to walk over to you, but his brain stops him. He wants to hug you. Wants so bad. But it is not professional. 
“Maybe i should go”, you say. “I think that you need some alone time to think. I’ll see you later, okay? Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
“No, wait”, he says and grabs your arm. “Don’t leave.”
You look at him questionably. 
“Let’s just sit”, he says and pulls you over to the deck chairs. 
“Are you sure that you’re okay?” you ask hesitantly. “You seem a bit on edge.”
“It’s not directed at you”, he says.
“Okay, but you’re still upset. I know that you hurt yourself, but it’s okay, it’ll heal quickly.”
“It’s not just that.”
He never makes mistakes. He never slips up. You’re becoming dangerous for him.
“Do you want to tell me?” you ask.
He shakes his head and gives you a small smile. “No. I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
It’s cute how worried you are about him. He gives you a smile. 
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It feels like a dagger through the heart when you tell him that it is your last week on board. What do you mean that you’re going home? You just came here. His mind spins as he tries to come up with something. He needs you here on this boat — or wherever he is — to work properly. Both figuratively and literally. He feels like he performs better, both in the operating theater and as a human. 
The cut on his hand has healed by now, but he can still feel the burning sensation of your fingers against his skin. He can’t — won't — forget it. He kept the bandage, despite the blood on it.
You need to be kept here … and he needs to come up with a solution on how to keep you. He could make you trip down the stairs and have you break a leg. No, you could still return home with broken bones. He could tie you up and lock you in, but if you screamed loud enough someone would hear you through the thin steel walls. You need to blend in. How does one blend in, in a floating prison with wounded people. 
Oh. Of course.
He makes his way to the medical supply room, looking around for something — anything — that he can use. He finds a little green bottle. You shouldn’t drink it straight away, but if he dilutes it in water, it should be fine. 
He decides to mix some of the dangerous substance in your tea the following mornings. For the first few days, there seem to be no symptoms of his little poisoning. Until the fourth morning when you’re not at his door when he expects you. He gets himself dressed and out of the room, marching down to your new — own — cabin. He knocks on the door. 
“Y/N, are you awake?” he asks. 
“Yes”, he hears your voice through the door, your voice thick and hoarse. 
“Can I come in?”
“No.”
He opens the door. You’re lying in the bed, curled up with your arms over your stomach. 
“How are you feeling?” he asks. 
You shake your head weakly. “Not well. My stomach really hurts … I think that I’m going to throw up. I haven’t been able to go get a bucket so I’ve been trying to keep it in.”
“I’ll get you a bucket.”
He leaves the room. Out in the corridor, he can’t help but smile. It’s finally kicking in. He had been worried that it wouldn’t work until you had left the ship … where he can’t care for you. He gets a clean bucket from a storage closet and returns. 
“Let’s get you up right”, he says and helps you sit up. 
The motion alone is enough to have you throwing up. He places the bucket under your mouth, letting you empty yourself. 
“I’m sorry”, you hiccup. 
“It’s okay”, he replies. 
“I don’t think I can work today.”
“I don’t expect you to.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Stop saying that.”
He opens the window and sits down by the desk. 
“You don’t have to stay here”, you say weakly, leaning against the wall. “I’ll be fine.”
“You won’t be fine”, the doctor says. “I can see that. You took care of me, now I’ll take care of you.”
“It’s different. I just put on bandage.”
“So? You weren’t skilled for more. I am, and I intend to put my knowledge to use.” 
He stands up abruptly, deciding to start right away. 
“Let’s get you some fresh air”, he says. “This open window won’t do.”
“Doctor, I can’t move”, you say, eyes widening. “I-I’ve tried, but I-I … I can’t.”
He frowns. Has he done too much? 
“My stomach hurts so much and my limbs don’t seem to want to move.”
“It’ll be okay”, he says shortly and lifts you up in his arms. “I’ll do the moving for you.”
He walks slowly along the decks, so as not to make your nausea even more unbearable. He walks out to the enclosed promenade where rows of beds stand along the walls and places you down in one of them, making sure to get you in the sunlight. With a smile, he tucks you in.
“Some fresh air and sunlight will do you good”, he says and sits down on the side of the bed. “Why don’t you try to get some rest? I suppose you haven’t had much this night. I’m not going anywhere, you’ll be safe.”
You nod and make yourself a bit more comfortable. 
“It’s hard to not be nauseous when the ship moves so much”, you mumble. 
“I have the bucket, you can vomit as much as you’d like”, he says. 
“In that case I won’t vomit at all. Because I don’t want to.”
Doctor Kry scoffs with a smile. 
“I know”, he says. “Try to rest now.”
He sits by your side until you’ve fallen asleep. You are so unbelievably sweet. In every single way. Doctor Kry stands up to go empty the bucket. He walks out the enclosed promenade, out onto the open deck and throws the contains over the side. 
“What’s with your apprentice?” Doctor Hart asks, walking over to him with his hands in his pockets. “Rumour says that they’re sick.”
“Yes, they are”, he says shortly. 
“Weren’t they going home this week?”
Do not remind me.
“They were”, he says, even colder. “Not anymore. I can’t let them go back if they have some kind of sickness. Better for them to be isolated here where it can’t spread far.”
“Is it contagious?”
“Yes, very. I think that you should stay away from them — tell everyone else to be cautious and keep distance as well.”
He grimaces and quickly backs away from him, walking away. Doctor Kry smirks and shakes his head. 
And you consider yourself smart enough to be a doctor? 
“What are you doing?”
The little boy is back. Nicholas stands a few steps behind him, watching curiously. 
“I’m emptying a bucket”, Doctor Kry answers, trying not to sound short and cold like usual. You like this kid and if he’s impolite to him, he’s sure he’ll hear about it from you. 
“Why?”
“Because there was vomit in it.”
“Ew! Did you get seasick?”
He rolls his eyes. “No, not me. Y/N’s not feeling well.”
“Is Y/N sick?”
“Yes.”
He looks worried. His best friend isn’t feeling well? Doctor Kry sighs. 
“Do you want to come and meet them later?” he asks. “They’re resting right now but you can come visit when they’re awake again.”
“When is that?” Nicholas asks. 
“I don’t know.”
“How will I know then?”
“I don’t know.”
He doesn’t wait to hear more dumb questions. Doctor Kry walks straight back to the enclosed promenade and places the bucket by the bed. He sits down by your legs and takes your hand. 
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A few days go by. He continuous to poison your tea, and help you throw up. When your body doesn’t want to do it anymore, when it’s too exhausted to work for your benefit, he has to help. 
“Alright, open your mouth”, he says, brushing any type of hair away from your face. “This will not be pleasant, but I need you to throw up, okay?”
You sit beside him on the bed with the bucket in your lap, hugging it tightly. Your unsure grimace is enough to answer. 
“I know”, he sighs. “It’ll be quick. It won’t hurt.”
“Okay”, you mumble and nod, opening your mouth. 
He reaches in with his fingers until they touch the soft part of the back of the mouth. Your mouth is warm and soft, making him feel light headed. As soon as you gag, he pulls his fingers away. You hover over the bucket for the thirteenth time in twenty four hours. Doctor Kry pats your back. 
“There you go”, he says. “See? Quick and easy.”
“Easy?” you cough, giving him a stern eye. “Nowhere near easy.”
“Okay, maybe not easy. Bad wording. But it’s over now. Good job, I’m proud of you.”
A sad smile appears on your face. You lean your head onto his shoulder, sighing in exhaustion. Doctor Kry tenses. His heart stops. 
“I’m so tired”, you whisper. “My body hurts.”
He hesitates before wrapping his arm around your shoulders, bringing you closer to him. Your scent clogs up his head. 
“I should be home by now”, you whisper. 
“I know”, doctor Kry whispers comfortingly. 
You break out into sobs. Doctor Kry swallows. He can imagine how you must feel. Body broken and unresponsive, not back home with your family like you had planned and anticipated … and you can’t do anything to stop it. Doctor Kry turns your body to him and hugs you. Holding you feels like heaven. You fit perfectly in his arms, as if you were made for him, and him only. You were born to be his.
“I'm sorry if this is unprofessional”, you mumble. 
“It's okay, you're sick”, he replies thickly
He closes his eyes, enjoying the embrace. It’s everything he could — and have — ever dreamt of. His own little patient, in his arms, where they belong. Only for him. Oh, God, he can never let you go. You will be here for as long as he is, and then he’ll take you back home to him. Whether you like it or not.
“I’m cold.”
“I'll go get you some more blankets.”
He dreads to let you go but he can't deny your request. Your warmth disappears from his embrace. 
He decides to hurry, wanting to get back to you as quickly as possible. As he walks down the main staircase, he feels the entire ship shudder and hear a loud ‘bang’. He has to grab onto the staircase railing to not fall over. The sound of porcelain crashing onto the floor in the distance hits him. He hurries down.
A man covered in soot runs past him. One of the men from the boiler room.
“The ship is flooding!” he shouts in full panic. “We're sinking!”
Doctor Kry widens his eyes. There's no way, right? They're a hospital ship! No one in their right mind would sink a hospital ship! His mind forgets the blanket. He needs a lifebelt. Not a blanket. 
He runs past the room where you had stayed first, and he can see the nurses inside trying to scramble their belongings into small purses. Without thinking, he marches over, shuts the door and grabs the nearest fire extinguisher to break the lock. He throws the fire extinguisher to the side and hurries down the corridor, opening the first door he finds. It's a cabin for female nurses. He reaches over one of the bunk beds, to a net where lifebelts Are kept. He pulls down two and runs out. 
The floor has started to shift beneath him. He can tell that it tilts to his left. She's going down by the stern.
He runs up the stairs, trying to push his way through a flood of people desperately climbing upwards. He wants to shout at them, but it won't matter. No one else will listen or care. Instead, he uses force to push himself through the crowd.
He has to get to you before anything happens. There's no certainty in how much time there is, but there is a certainty of death if he doesn't hurry up. 
He runs through packed corridors, ripping open your door.
“What's going on?” you ask with wide eyes.
There's something horrific with your fearful eyes. Everything about you is dull and tired, besides your panicking eyes. 
“We've been hit”, he says in a steady voice and forces the white lifebelt over your head, tying it tightly around your body. “We need to get to a lifeboat as quickly as possible.”
“What?” you ask in shock. “What happened? You said that we were okay, that nothing would happen to a hospital ship!”
He doesn't answer. If he does, he's worried that he'll snap at you. Instead, he lifts you up and carries you out of the room. He makes sure not to trip, but carrying you through tilted spaces is harder than he expects. Giving up is not an option, however.
The boat deck is crowded. He manages to get through to a lifeboat and sits down with you in his arms.
“I’m scared”, you whisper.
“It's okay”, the doctor whispers back. “Everything is going to be okay.”
He holds you tightly when the lifeboat slowly sinks towards the water, scared that you might fall off. 
Seeing the ship from afar as the lifeboat makes its way away from it finally puts things together in your head. You gasp. You had been on that … and if Kry hadn't come get you you would still be on it, waiting for death.
The bow slowly rises out of the water, dripping with water. The sun shines right on it, as if it is the ocean’s main attraction. The room where doctor Kry locked in the nurses is far underwater by now. He hides a smirk under his hand. He had promised that they would be punished for what they had done. They'd have a chance if they hadn't been childish.
“I never thought that I’d see something like this”, you say. “I never wanted to see the bottom of a ship.”
“Me neither”, the doctor replies. 
“Will many die?”
“No, not many. I’m sure of it.”
You creep closer to him, shivering although you don’t feel any cold winds. He holds you tighter. 
The only thing left of the floating hospital is a steamy, bubbling mess, filled with debris. It’s like you can hear her hit the ocean floor. You can’t help but wonder what position she is in, if you’ll ever get to know. If anyone ever will dive down and check. If that will be possible.
“It’s so silent”, you whisper and meet his blue eyes. “It shouldn’t be silent … should it?”
“I don’t know”, he replies. “What is the other choice? People screaming?”
You shake your head quickly. Don’t want to imagine that.
Hours go by. When the evening comes, you’re picked up by another ship and given blankets and food. Doctor Kry stays close to you, not letting anyone get close. He sits in a protective position beside you, arms crossed over his chest, eyes scanning everything and everyone around him. 
The little boy clings to a woman who you guess is his mother. He doesn’t seem to understand what has happened, how lucky he is, and you hope that he never will.
“What will happen now?” you wonder quietly.
“I will continue to care for you until you are well”, he says. “That’s what will happen. I will take care of the rest, you don’t have to worry about anything. Just lean on me and everything will be alright, okay?”
You nod. Doctor Kry smiles and straightens his neck. 
“Good.”
You look up at the colorful evening sky and sighs. No one died this day — apart from a few nurses who doctor Kry didn’t like, but he will never tell you that — and that is a comfort. But you’re unaware of the plans doctor Kry has for you. And maybe that’s for the best.  
615 notes · View notes
trexiejan · 2 months ago
Text
Friendly reminder that DC and Dickbabs writers are gaslighting you into thinking Dickbabs are childhood sweethearts that are always in love with each other since day 1.
Dickbabs is the most superficial manufactured by retcons ship.
Babs was deaged for this crap to work.
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Here is Original Barbara Gordon working as a congresswoman in the Senate when Dick was just the little kid Robin.
She was much closer to Bruce and Clark's age than Dick's.
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Barbara refers to Dick as a "kid" and "little brother.
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Dick had a small puppy crush on her but it was seen as a precocious crush. It was controversial when they first kiss (to make Dick shut up) because it involved a grown ass woman kissing a teenager.
Dickbabs was hated the same way modern Brucebabs is hated today.
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Even the writer of that book admitted he never intended for them to become a couple.
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Babs was more into older guys.
- she was viewed as an equal love interest to Batman
- she went out on a date with Superman
- then got engaged to her coworker Jason Bard.
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Dickbabs shippers always try to deny that Babs was deaged and her history was altered for dickbabs in an effort to defend their ship.
They say it's not true because according to them Babs has been deaged long before dickbabs became a couple.
Here's the thing though:
Babs has been deaged twice.
Just because she wasn't deaged to be with Dick in her 1st deaging doesn't change the fact that she was deaged to be the same age as him in her 2nd deaging which happened in dickbabs content.
The 1st time she was deaged was in Crisis on Infinite Earths, it was so Jim could be younger but they only decreased her age slightly because she's still written as older than Dick, here is a panel from Secret Origins #20 that was published in 1986 exactly 1 year after she was first deaged in Crisis on infinite earths (1985) she said Dick is too young for her and that batman is always the one on her mind. So Dickbabs during this time still couldn't work because they still have that age gap and Babs was still into Bruce.
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The 2nd time she was deaged is in dickbabs comics and tv shows where she was finally made the same age as Dick so dickbabs can finally work as a romantic pairing.
Instead of being older, she's now written as a part of Dick's generation.
From a congresswoman to a young girl who went to highschool prom with Dick.
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Even Tom Taylor had the two first meet when they were young little kids so he can also portray them as childhood sweethearts in his run.
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Tom Taylor claims Barbara still has a law degree but isn't it sad how instead of using that degree to find an actual job, she wasted her time following Dick around like a dog in Bludhaven ?
She has no job of her own, no friends of her own, no hobbies of her own outside of Dick.
She's just Dick's clingy lovesick girlfriend who is a total standby for him in his solo books.
Dickbabs shippers who deny this and get mad at people who point this out are the people who don't care about Barbara Gordon as an individual.
They don't care that Barbara lost her PHD degree, lost her own career, lost her own agency, lost her history, lost her self identity for the sake of shipping.
Their only concern is defending dickbabs and making it look better.
Because if they truly like Barbara separately from Dick, all these valid anti-dickbabs criticisms wouldn't bother them.
What's even funnier is that they are the very same people who accuse Starfire of being reduced into Dick's love interest despite the fact that Starfire hasn't been in a relationship with Dick in the comics for 20+ years due to the fact that dickkory's history was ignored and erased in favor of dickbabs. NASTY HYPOCRITES.
At least Starfire wasn't deaged to fit Dick and you can never see Starfire following Dick around like a dog in his solo books 💀
537 notes · View notes
sp0o0kylights · 5 months ago
Text
Eyes wide, body frigid in terror, Eddie felt the sheer horror of the current situation sank in. 
He was at Gen Con. 
In their hotel.
With zero vacant rooms and one minor, Henderson created, screw up.
The room only had one bed in it. 
“It’s fine, we can share.” Steve said, brushing past.
Like this was not the life ending, earth shattering, soul rendering issue that it was.
“I can sleep on the floor.” Eddie croaked trying to remember how a normal person acted instead of someone whose stomach had just fallen out of their ass. 
“Nah, I did this all the time with the basketball team.” Steve said as Eddie actively regretted every single decision that had led to this point in his life.
“Hell this is even a king sized bed. We have plenty of space!” 
Steve did a goofy little spin jump, landing butt first on the bed and bouncing on it with glee. 
“Space, sure.” Eddie echoed. 
Hands shaking, eyes determinedly focused on anything but the ex-jock, Eddie found himself chanting a mantra over and over in his head.
One that would valiantly get him through the next weekend, God and D20's willing.
'I'm fine, this is fine, everything's fine...'
“I don’t have cooties, if that's what you're worried about.”” Steve waggled his eyebrows. "Here,  I’ll even let you have one of my pillows.”  
Said pillow was flung through the air, to smack Eddie dead in the face. 
'Fuck it." Eddie thought wildly. "I am NOT fine!'
And after Eddie got his hands on him, Dustin Henderson wouldn't be either.
xXx
“I am going to kill you.” Eddie snarled, the very second he could get Dustin alone.
“No you won’t, you love me too much.” Henderson dismissed, a smug little smirk in place. 
The absolute brat. 
“I do not, and if I did, I would take it back after this.” Eddie glanced around once again, beyond paranoid about discussing this in the open parking lot of a shitty hotel, but knowing he needed to get this under control, now. 
“What were you thinking!?” 
“That I read a really interesting zine about this exact scenario, mostly.” Dustin shrugged. “Worked out great for them, I thought I’d try it for you!” 
Eddie groaned, head flying back as he fisted both hands in his hair.
(if only to prevent himself from wrapping both hands around Dustin’s stupid throat.) 
“What did I tell you? This isn’t something you fuck with man!” 
“I know, but as I told you, Steve is perfect!” Dustin protested, and didn’t even have the decency to flinch when Eddie lost control and grabbed him by the collar. 
“Perfect!?” He sputtered, actually sputtered, shaking the fist that held Dustin's shirt captive. “Perfect!?” 
“Trust me on this--you have a crush on him, he desperately needs someone in his life--seriously, Eddie, it’s sad how he acts when he’s not dating--and you guys get along great now! What’s the problem!?”
“He’s straight!” Eddie shrieked, startling several onlookers. 
“Laced!” He added immediately after, in panicked afterthought. “He’s so straight laced we could never get him to agree to that plan!” 
Dustin leveled an unimpressed look at him. 
“Dude, really?”
“We are still in Indiana, Henderson.” Eddie said, then got close enough that he felt comfortable hissing the next part through clenched teeth.
“They don’t exactly care for the queers here, even at a place like this.” 
“Are you sure? Because the Con’s welcome packet has a few different panels that--”
Eddie scrubbed a hand over his face, letting go of his idiot, freshman friend's shirt to grab at his hair again. 
“Henderson, for once,” He pleaded, and maybe it was the sheer desperation in his tone or how upset he looked but either way Dustin seemed to finally realize how serious he was.
“just once, I need you to listen to me. You cannot let Steve know I’m gay. This is something that has to stay between us, especially now I’m sharing a bed with him.” 
Which Dustin knew, because Dustin was the one who’d called and changed the room. 
“But Steve’s--”
“Most likely bisexual, I heard you the first several times you said it, but you can’t just--assume that about someone!” Eddie was well and good on a rant now, two seconds away from pacing about. “Even if you’ve been to a salon with them!” 
He pointed firmly at Dustin’s stupid face (and the kid's equally stupid mouth) before he could once again insist Steve was into men purely based on how anal he was about his hair.
“Steve might be cool with--other people,” Eddie was unsure of who knew what about Robin, and was not about to hand Dustin another secret given how he was acting about this one, “but that does not mean he will be cool with me--or you, pimping him out, to me!” 
“I’m not pimping him out!” Offended, Dustin patted at his shirt where Eddie had previously been holding it. “Look I’m sorry, but--”
Eddie groaned, loud and dramatic. 
“But,” Dustin doubled down, “You trusted me with the whole, you know.” He waved his hands in some sort of vague, unreadable gesture. “Can’t you trust me about this?”
“I didn’t trust you with that, you barged into my room and then dug around my closet insisting your character notes got mixed in with mine when I was hi-sleeping!--and then read something personal!” 
The snort he got in return let him know Dustin was well aware he’d been high as hell, but that was neither here nor there, given what had happened after. 
When Dustin, rifling through Eddie’s closet, came across one of Eddie’s private notebooks. 
The ones that contained equally private stories, penned by Eddie's hand.
One of which might have had characters--who did not sound like Steve, thank you,-- and definitely not paired with a character based on Eddie himself. 
(“So Sir Sylvan Harrachtáin and Edwin Morningson are random names you pulled out of your ass, huh?”
“Shut up.”
“Sir Sylvan with his great hair and--what’s this? A horse named…Beamer?”
“Henderson so help me--” ) 
It may have led to the two of them growing closer instead of Eddie getting chased out of town with pitchforks, but that hadn’t stopped the sheer panic it had caused when he realized just what it was Dustin was reading. 
“Potato, tomato.” The little shit dismissed, and Eddie felt the urge to strangle him return in full force. “Look I get it--I promised I wouldn’t tell and I keep my promises. But since there aren’t any other rooms in our inn…”
Eddie looked at the sky, because if he saw the little dipshit wiggle his eyebrows in relation to himself and Steve Harrington, his new friend, who baked cookies with Jeff and once helped Grant jump his car, Eddie was going to lose his mind.
Loudly, and with much fanfare. 
“You owe me. Big time.” He declared to the clouds. 
He pretended not to hear the sigh that got him, either. 
“If you so say. Now can we go to the convention?" A whine crept into Henderson's voice. "Steve’s going to think we’re fighting.”
"Fine.” Eddie finally lowered his head to glare Dustin dead in the eyes.
“But to make my ire clear, Henderson? That magic sword your dwarf just acquired is gone. Disappeared. Vanished like a puff of smoke."
He made a ‘proof’ noise, hands spreading out as he did it. 
Dustin’s jaw dropped.
“What!? Eddie--” 
“Nope.
“Edd-iieeeee--”
“I’m not listening.” He plunged both fingers in his ears, walking determinedly towards one of the other three hotel rooms Hellfire had crammed themselves in. 
Wished desperately that he could manage to swap beds with Jeff, or Grant, or someone without making Steve feel like shit--which it would, because Eddie knew things like that about Steve now.
Behind him Dustin rampaged, which at least, made Eddie a little happier.
xXx
“We can switch rooms.” 
“What?” Eddie asked, startled out of his present thoughts (and the giant pile of D&D related papers spread in a circle around him.)
He turned to look up at Steve, who was hovering awkwardly behind him.
“You’ve been weird ever since you realized we’re sharing a bed. If it’s making you that uncomfortable we can just switch.” He shrugged, like saying that didn’t hurt him, even as the kicked puppy look holding court on his face very much screamed ‘emotional damage.’
"I have not!” Eddie twisted himself around immediately. "I am perfectly fine, thank you!"
Steve frowned down at him. 
“Eddie, this is the longest conversation I’ve had with you since we got here." Steve deadpanned. "I’d blame that on the whole, you know, nerd herd gathering, but it’s pretty clear that’s not it. I watched you literally turn around and walk the other way when you spotted me earlier." 
Shit.
"It's kinda obvious you're avoiding me." 
Shit, shit, shit!
“I'm not, promise!" Eddie lied. "I’m just--distracted. There’s just so much happening and it’s--a lot.”
He said it like the con was overwhelming, and not chaos he was positively thriving in. 
Steve searched his face.
“Alright," He said doubtfully, "but I mean it. Say the word and we can switch. I'm sure Jeff'll let me share a blanket or something."
Which was the last thing anybody needed, on grounds that Jeff would try and fix things.
(Jeff, bless him, had never been good at fixing things.)
Drumming up every acting skill he possessed, Eddie flashed two thumbs up in response, painting a fat grin on his face.
“We're all good Stevie. Besides, I’m going to be up late at so many panels, you won’t even notice me coming back. You're practically gonna have the room to yourself!"
Because that was exactly what he was planning on doing, the second he realized the convention itself could provide a nice, neat little way out in the form of two different late night panels.
Who needed sleep anyway? Not him!
"Okay." Steve said, somewhat mollified.
Crisis averted, Eddie dove back into his plans, distracting himself as best he could while trying to ignore that Steve had dropped onto the bed.
(One of those plans might have involved revenge on Henderson, and that one he gave special attention to.)
xXx
There were no late nigh panels.
“Not until tomorrow, my friend!” The jovial guy dressed in what Eddie was pretty sure was supposed to be a wizard costume told him. “We had a few but the folks running them got stuck in traffic, so we had to cancel."
He beamed, like he hadn’t just disintegrated Eddie's one and only escape plan.
"Besides, if you go to sleep now you can catch some of the early morning panels!”
As if he hadn't planned on rolling into them anyway, lack of sleep be damned.
“Can we go back now?” Gareth grumped to his right, the only person who’d agreed to stay out all night with him (and who was not a 14 year old who’d been overruled by Harrington.) 
"We could go find a room party?" Eddie hedged instead, as they made their retreat.
"Dude."
"Fine," He muttered, defeated. "We can go back."
To Steve. 
And the single bed. 
In his head, he plotted out Henderson's death.
Maybe he'd use fire.
Or sticks, or even a fricken--toy horse, or something...
xXx
He'd done it.
Changed into the oversized shirt he called sleep clothes, and crawled into bed like a completely normal, totally straight human being.
Had even done a remarkable job of laying perfectly still. Exactly how a normal, not panicking person slept!
'I'm fine, this is fine, everything's fine...'
Steve was laying next to him.
He had to of course, that's how a bed worked, and yet somehow, Eddie couldn't get past it.
Or the fact that the dick wasn't wearing a shirt to bed.
His thoughts chased each other in nervous little circles, anxiety gnawing on his gut like a favored bone as Eddie did his best not to move one single inch.
Pity that the thing about attending a large convention, was the sheer amount of walking, talking, and expending general energy one had to do.
Entirely against his will, Eddie fell asleep. 
He had been planning on laying awake in frigid terror all night, to prevent any possible way Steve might clock him, but his body had other plans.
Some of which involved sleeping like Eddie normally slept--arms hugging a pillow, head buried in it's soft, comfortable, kinda ticklish surface.
He rubbed his nose further into it as the tickling sensation increased, pulling him away from the sleep he hadn't realized he'd fallen into.
Grumbling, Eddie went to adjust his stupid pillow when he had the weirdest realization that it too, was moving.
Pillows, his sleep addled brain informed him, did not move.
Steve would, though.
"Fuck!" He screeched, flying up into a sitting position as he registered that he'd gone full octopus--cuddling Steve with all four limbs.
Steve flew awake, his own body flying up into a sitting position.
His mouth started moving a mile a minute, and it took Eddie a second to parse that Steve was still partially asleep as he let out a string of absolute nonsense about code reds and being upside down.
"Whoa!" Eddie said when the guy nearly fell out of bed. "Shit Steve, it's just me!"
"Eddie?" Steve asked, halfway out of bed. "Are we--is everything okay?"
"Yeah I--yeah." He grimaced, grabbing a strand of his hair and pulling it protectively over his face. "I think I woke you up."
"S'okay." Steve ran a hand through his hair, before slowly sinking back into the bed, alarm fading. "Are you okay? Nightmare?"
Eddie blew out a breath.
"Probably. It's fine, don't worry about it."
Steve eyed him doubtfully.
"If you're sure..."
Eddie gave him a wobbly smile back, patting the space on the bed next to him as he made himself lay back down. "Promise. I'm--I'm sorry, I guess maybe I should have slept elsewhere..."
That did it.
"You're good. Startled me is all." Steve let out a sort of forced chuckle before laying back down. "I overreacted."
Eddie hummed, not trusting himself to say anything as the two of them settled back down.
It did not escape him that unlike most people who'd been rudely woken up in the middle of the night, Steve didn't try to keep any distance between them.
No, he had to scoot closer, like he needed to know his friend was near. 
Eddie squeezed his eyes closed and prayed for death.
"I get nightmares too, sometimes." Steve admitted in the following quiet and oh, God, no, Eddie could not do an emotional late night talk right now.
"They definitely suck." He said flatly, before rolling over to face the opposing wall. "Night Stevie."
Steve snorted, but it sounded amused instead of hurt.
Eddie sighed quietly in relief as he too, turned away to face the wall.
He could do this. He just had to make sure he didn't screw up and fall asleep again, and everything would be...
Perfectly...
...fine.
xXx
"--ddie, you're on my arm man."
"Wha?"
"My arm." That was Steve, Eddie's brain dutifully identified as it crawled it's way to consciousness. Steve who was his friend now, and was also talking very close to his ear. 
"Also my leg. And torso."
"You have a nice torso." Eddie mumbled thoughtlessly. 
Why was Steve here? They were doing something that should have been stressing him out, was stressing him out, but it was hard to think when he was this tired.
"Thanks," Amusement threaded it's way through Steve's voice, "but I'm going numb here. You have a hell of a grip."
Eddie frowned, the words sludging through the fog, until finally, the dots connected.
Eyes opening wide, he carefully took stock of the position he once again found himself in--wrapped around Steve like the guy was the only life raft left.
Oh my God.
"Shit sorry--" Steve oof'ed as Eddie smacked an elbow into his ribs as he let the poor man go, madly scrambling to get as far away as possible.
He tried to apologize for that, but was too busy fighting the bedsheets to get anything out. 
"Eds." Steve laughed, grabbing him as Eddie tangled them both up. "Calm down."
"I'm calm!" He protested, far too loudly, limbs flying every which way as he tried in vein to get the fuck away.
Stupid sheets-!
"Eddie." Two heavy hands came down on his shoulders, Steve having managed to get himself into a sitting position. "It's alright."
"It's not Steve." Eddie spat, and then panicked harder because fuck, that is not what he should have said.
"Hey, easy." Steve was talking quieter now, hands squeezing gently, like Eddie was some kind of spooked wild animal and fuck, he was really losing it here.
"I mean it. We're at the convention, remember? We're sharing a hotel room and you have a bunch of dorks and dumbass things to do in like, two hours."
Eddie violently shrugged him off.
"I know that!"
Steve, somehow, did not take offense to the very aggressive tone that had been snarled in. 
"Then you know you can breath for a moment. Seriously, you look like you're gonna pass out."
Which was probably true, given the rapid, rabbiting beat of his heart.
"Is this what you were worried about?" Steve added, as Eddie finally freed himself from the damn sheets. "That you have nightmares?"
“It's not nightmares.” Eddie spat instantly, chest heaving.
His head hurt, his eyes hurt, and he was exhausted to the point where he wanted to cry about it.
God did being gay suck.
“Then--what? That you cuddle in your sleep?” Steve was teasing, Eddie knew Steve was teasing but that was too on the nose. “Dude trust me, Tommy was an octopus growing up. I don’t care.”
“No it’s not, that, exactly--”
"So what is it then, exactly?"
Too. Fucking. Close.
"Drop it Steve--"
Emotions rose like a tidal wave, all encompassing. Overwhelming. 
"I would if you weren't clearly upset about something--" 
He lost control. 
“I’m gay!” Eddie yelled.
Then he clapped a hand over his mouth, like he hadn’t just panicked himself out of the closet. 
It died. 
The crazy, huge emotions. The way he'd been fighting himself, tooth and nail, the panicked thoughts that were zooming around his brain.
“I didn’t say that.” He said, eyes wide.
Steve blinked.
“I mean, you kinda did.”
Eddie shook his head.
“Nope. No. I said, I said--”
“That you’re gay.” Steve finished, then frowned when Eddie flinched. “Dude it’s okay--”
“Is it, Steve!?” He interrupted, hand finally falling from his mouth. “Is it? Because if you ask half the people at this convention--who are my kind of people and understand I’m not shilling souls to satan--if it's okay!? They'd say no!"
Tears pressed against his eyes, a reaction he hated that he had.
"They'd say no, and then they'd try to kick my ass for sleeping in the same bed as them!" 
A tear escaped and he swiped angrily at it. 
“I’m okay with it.” Steve said quietly, which had the effect of making Eddie shut up. “And those people suck.” 
The laugh that escaped Eddie's mouth was brittle.
Bitter.
He turned his head away from Steve, angry that he’d gone and admitted the very thing he knew better than ever speaking aloud. 
“Yeah well, I didn't think you would be, given how you used to accuse anyone and everyone of being a queer loser right along with the rest of the basketball team.”
Which wasn't fair, exactly--Eddie knew Steve had changed. Had seen it in the way he and Robin talked quietly about Will, when they thought no one could overhear.
(A habit Eddie would break them of, if he and Steve made it out of here as friends, still.) 
He wasn't Will though, and Will wasn't the one presently sharing a bed with Steve.
“That’s because we were all making out with each other at away games.” It was said so fucking quick Eddie briefly thought he hallucinated it.
Lucky for him, Steve wasn't done. 
“Robin thinks that whole thing was some kind of group denial. Like if we made enough of a thing out of it we could all pretend we didn’t have our hands down each others pants all the time. I am not exactly on speaking terms with that group anymore.”
He shrugged like that his fall from grace hadn’t been the center of the rumor mill for most of his senior year, and came with a lot of shit talking at his expense.
“But I can still prove it to you, if you’d like.” 
Shock--and six million thoughts-- hit Eddie like a mack truck. 
‘You’re lying/No way/that makes so much fucking sense/how did that even start/was it every game/whose pants exactly did you have your hands down and how do you feel about my pants--’ 
“How?” Eddie got out, sounding only slightly strangled. 
“Well--you’re here. I’m here."
And then Steve gave him a smile Eddie had only ever seen aimed at women, a slow lazy curl of the mouth that implied a hell of a lot.
"I'm fine with making the math work."
Maybe he was dreaming this.
(Eddie pinched himself and found that somehow, he was not.)
“I realize I don’t look like it, but I don't the whole casual kissing thing." Eddie blurted out. "Hasn't exactly gone well for me."
He regretted it the second it left his mouth. 
That was sharing too much of himself. The vulnerable gooey part who'd kissed a few girls (and even, once, a guy) and found he couldn't for the life of him make such things casual.
Plus Steve was kind of a good friend now, and Eddie had a crush so big that doing this and then never doing it again would kill him, and--
(and, and, and…) 
“It can mean something if you’d like.”
What.
“What?” 
Eddie stared at him.
Steve stared back. 
“Steve Harrington." He said flatly. "Are you trying to get in my pants?”
‘I will rip them off right here and now if you are,’ He thought wildly, like he hadn’t just tried to die on some “it has to be meaningful” hill. 
(Sue him, he was a horny teenager who'd just learned sex might be on the table, he could change his mind.
It totally wouldn’t tear his heart apart after either!
Nope, not his, made of steel Eddie’s heart was--) 
Steve raised his hands in the “don’t shoot” pose, looking all too pleased with himself. 
“Hey, you can’t fault a guy for trying. But,” and here he dropped the flirty little grin, which Eddie was only now realizing he was utilizing, “I meant it. I'm not opposed to trying this out, with you."
Trying? What the hell did that mean!?
Steve hadn't stopped talking.
"I won’t take it anywhere if you don’t want to though, don't worry.
Then he tilted his head and added; “I can also leave if that made you uncomfortable. Robin keeps telling me I can’t flirt with men like I flirt with women and--” 
“No.” Eddie’s mouth betrayed him yet again, terrified Steve might talk himself into leaving. “No--you offered!”
Steve raised an eyebrow.
“I did.”
“To have--” God Eddie couldn’t even say the words, “with me?” 
Somehow that last part came out as a question, and Eddie planned immediately to throw himself out of a window.
The grin was coming back. “Yes. With you.” 
“And it would…mean something?”
That was pushing it, Eddie knew that was pushing it, but it was like he couldn't stop himself.
This whole thing was now a runaway train and he'd ride it to it's inevitable wreck.
“For me it would.” Steve said, raising himself up on his knees. 
He inched forward, planting his hands down on the bed, face awfully close to Eddie’s own. 
“I don't like doing things anymore without it meaning something. To be honest, I don’t think I ever did. Besides, Robin's right."
"About?" Eddie asked, goin cross-eyed as Steve leaned ever so much closer.
"That when I say I admire you, or I miss you, or that I want to see you, I'm not exactly meaning it in a friend way."
Oh.
"Oh." Eddie said dumbly.
Steve closed the distance, mouth first. 
They were kissing.
Stars exploded in the sky. Fireworks went off outside, birds sang, people cheered--
(Eddie bit Steve’s lip, twice, in some sort of overexcited maneuver before he was gently guided into Steve’s lap, the ex-jock twisting to lay back down and bringing Eddie with him. 
It was smoothly done, a slow maneuver, and Eddie had to go and ruin that too by ripping his mouth off Steve’s to press sloppy kisses all down his neck. 
Thankfully Steve did not shove him off for that, or the hickie he definitely left on that stupid, tan neck, instead arranging them once again until things, finally, started to be less frantic. 
It was the best night of Eddie's life.)
xXx 
“So what does mean something involve, in this little situation we have here?” Eddie said some odd amount of time later, cuddled happily against a now naked Harrington. 
“I’m not supposed to say boyfriends.” Steve mumbled into Eddie’s shoulder. “Scares people off."
Apparently he was the type to need naps immediately after having the naked kind of fun. 
“Who the fuck told you that?” Eddie reached down, lacing their hands together tightly.
Steve kissed his shoulder. 
“We haven’t even gone on a proper date yet.” He said, rather than responding directly.
“We can’t, Steve, or did you forget where we live?”
Another kiss, this one turning into a grin when it made Eddie shudder. 
“Oh we absolutely can. I’ll prove it to you. Next Friday?” 
It took him a moment--a stupidly long moment, for someone who prided himself as a wordsmith--but Eddie got it. 
A smile exploded over his face. 
“Next Friday." He said. "It’s a date.” 
(A very long time later, Henderson would find out about all this and gloat about this so hard he’d fall off the steps of Eddie’s trailer. 
Eddie would only let him live on grounds that Steve was also there at the time, and was worried about Dustin’s ankle.
This did not stop Eddie from standing above the little shit, announcing karma would one day get him soon, and if not, than Max Mayfield, who absolutely could be bribed into committing murder.)
This was the bonus for Door Prize/Sugar, Spice (and Everything Dicey) which can be read in it's entirely here: LINK
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spicy-apple-pie · 6 months ago
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You know how in Batman and Robin, when Nobody finds out that Damian was only pretending to rebel against Bruce and lowkey tortures him. There’s a panel where he’s breaking Damian’s fingers.
So imagine afterwards, most of Damian’s fingers have been broken. He cannot use his hands for anything. So Bruce has to take care of him. He feeds him, bathes him (just cloth bathes, since Damian’s casts are too much of a hassle), and keeps him company since Damian can’t do a lot of what he usually does to past the time.
Damian is super pissed he’s pretty much bed bound for a couple of weeks, and Bruce can’t blame him. Because yeah, it fucking sucks. He’s sure that Damian would try to sneak away to train or something, but luckily the pain meds make him drowsy enough for him to just pout on the couch.
He also complains about Bruce trying to find something for them to watch, claiming that such things are brain rotting. Bruce begins to put on animal documentaries, which Damian seems to enjoy well enough. But then Bruce starts showing him other things, like that guy who restores old paintings, which Damian gets really into. And eventually Bruce manages to get Damian to try a Ghibli movie, probably Grave of the Fireflies since it’s more grounded in reality and Damian loves it. And they proceed to binge watch all the Ghibli movies they can find.
At one point, Bruce pulls Damian close to him, and hugs him tight. “Father, what are you-“
“Shh.” Bruce hushes, in a sad tone. “I just- I need to know you’re here. That you’re safe.”
And Damian realizes that his Father, a man he idolized and looked up to as long as he could remember, was scared. Bruce’s “death” taught him that his Father wasn’t invincible. But his Father being scared was a whole other thing. It made him… human. And that made Damian scared too.
Damian allowed his Father to hold him. And felt himself slowly melt into it. He took comfort in it too. As much as it scared him, it was almost comforting to know that his Father was scared for him. That he was loved just as much as Bruce’s other kids. He wasn’t the problem child or a demon. Damian was Bruce’s kid, his son.
And even after Damian heals and is able to care for himself, they still have movies nights every so often.
Idk having a story where Bruce has to learn to trust Damian followed by a story where Damian has to learn to trust Bruce. GIVE IT TO ME!!!
This is why we need to bring back “filler”.
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