#look at how his eyes get so big and full of love when giving vex the title

[aq2003]

LOOK AT HIM. LOOK AT MY BOY

[barbieaemond]

And I dream of a grave

Header by the lovely @ewanmitchellcrumbs 💕💕

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x wife!reader

Warnings: angst (!), smut, too many references to graves/burying, mentions of Blood & Cheese, miscommunication, Aemond's coping mechanism is violence and sex, in this order (good for him)

Word count: 3.8k

Author's note: the gif is self explanatory. This is a prequel to A Curse for a Curse, but can be read as a standalone. Big thank you to @irenadel for giving me the idea and being one of the most supportive souls <3

Taglist: @ladystarksneedle @arcielee @multyfangirl

MASTERLIST | English is not my first language

This is more than tempting the Gods. This is forsaking and impudently turning their backs on them.

As she sits down at the banquet, her mother’s words echo through her mind like the vexing sound of the wind on a storm’s night. It sets an unpleasant weight on her lungs, the close and yet shapeless feel of something dreadful. She’s almost grateful, looking around, to ascertain she’s not the only fool dreading this whole act.

The Dowager Queen sits at the table, barely able to contain a grimace. Queen Helaena, she is certain, has never looked so pale, her eyes so vacuous and yet so full of something unknown, elusive, smoke clouding and clearing her unnatural stare. The Hand has conveniently made himself absent. She can’t blame him. Actually, she envies him. If only she too could have been spared such a farce. But as the wife of the King’s brother, the very one they’re all supposed to celebrate tonight, she cannot do that, can she?

To cheers and the blaring of trumpets, the King enters shoulder to shoulder with his brother, tall and proud in his stride, wearing dark green velvet for such a special occasion, and such a special title.

“Do you know how they’re going to call you from now on?” the Queen Mother had asked when he came back from Storm’s end, dripping rain and mud and war.

“I do, Mother.” Aegon had answered, twisting a knife from his seat at the head of the table; she had never caught that glint of satisfaction in his eyes, not like that; it wasn’t dimmed by wine or flesh, but sharp as the blade in his hand. “A title he should be proud of.”

Pride was ever the easiest thing to wear for Aemond, the softest glove gliding on his skin, born out of a pit so deep and full of insecurities and negligence that that same endless depth had grown out of proportion in order to fill itself. To even try scratching his pride was like trying to climb the highest mountain with bare hands. She had cut her palms open to do so.

“What happened, Aemond?” she had asked once alone in their chambers.

“You know what happened.”

“What really happened?”

His good eye had pierced her as if she were made of crystal, but his jaw was too set, on the verge of breaking his own teeth if he carried on keeping the guilt, and truth, trapped inside.

“I didn’t want to.” He whispered, coming down from the peak, “I didn’t want to kill him. I only wanted—”

“Revenge? Well, you had it. Did it make you feel good? Did you bring that boy peace at last?”

It took him a lifetime to say no; a whispered sound, choked even, as if he had bitten off his tongue to get it out of that pit where he had never looked again.

He was biting his tongue in the council, the faintest clench in his jaw but here, here in the council, here in the world, he had to keep that pit buried and stand straight on the highest peak, looking up and up, never down, never back. How could he, how could he admit he had lost control. It was easier, safer, to let them think of him a monster, rather than just human.

“I salute you, brother.” The King had said, raising his cup “True blood of the dragon! We shall have a feast in your honor!" Otto had merely lowered his head in defiance, going unnoticed in the eyes of his King and grandson, drunk with power and finally free of his mother's leash, unaware that a golden noose now held him in check.

He had summoned jesters, musicians, even some dancers to coddle his brother, and raise him higher and higher. She imagined she just had to wait for the fall. Or perhaps pray to the Seven to overlook the insult, to keep a mortal up there with them for a little more. But then again, they shouldn’t ask the Gods for mercy. Someone more unforgiving, more bloodthirsty. Someone who, just as her husband and his brother and each one of their cursed dynasty, did not listen to either Gods or men.

“A toast!” the King says at one point, turning to his left. “To my brother Aemond and a long overdue justice, is it not?”

Out of courtesy and duty, she grabs her cup and raises it, but as everyone at the table sips their wine, all she tastes is contempt, and the cup hits the surface untouched. But not unseen.

“Brother, wine may cloud my judgment, but it seems to me that your beloved wife does not share the sentiment of this fine evening. I wonder why.”

She holds the King’s demanding stare with a firm one, aware of Aemond looking at her even if his eye is fixed on the table. He has ignored her for the whole night, not sparing her a single glance. Because she owns the truth, doesn’t she, and it’s a knife pointed at his back.  

“May I speak my mind, your Grace?”

There’s the slightest shift in Alicent’s posture, as if she were desperately waiting for her, or anyone, to cease all of this, to say this isn’t right.

Aegon pulls a thin, lazy smile and tilts his silver head, swirling his cup. “Why, of course, Princess. My brother tells me you have a habit of doing so.”

“Did he, now?” she resists the urge to scoff; such a despicable habit for a woman in this world.

“Fret not, good sister, I’m certain he holds no grudges against you for your silver tongue.”

“Oh, I’m quite certain too, your Grace. I know for a fact that he likes it.”

A few lords can do very little to hold their snickering, Aegon himself does not hide his malicious smirk, petty at the edges. It must run in the blood.

“Careful though, you don’t want to spend too much time talking, lest you leave my poor brother without any heir! It’s been a while since you two lovebirds tied the knot, isn’t that right?”

She glances beside her, surely Aemond won’t let that slight insult pass, but he stays still and silent like a statue. She can’t quite believe what she’s witnessing. This is the same man who would call the crowned head at the table wastrel, depraved, disgrace.

So much for a disgrace, now that he fosters your pride and lies.

“I can assure you, good brother, that the talking is well outweighed by other activities that involve very few words.”

Aegon plasters a big grin on his face, yet she’s not finished. “But perhaps the Gods are sparing me the burden of bringing a child in such troubled times. A realm at war is not the best place to live in, is it not?”

“It depends on which side you’re on, Princess.”

There’s suspicion in his tone, but she just blinks at him. ��My apologies, I was not aware that my loyalty to your House, and my husband’s, was to be questioned.”

“Come now. We are bound by what if not words?”

“I was under the impression that the Crown should fear his own kin more than a simple foreign girl from the West.”

At that, Helaena lets out a strange noise, something close to a wince, and silence falls all over. It is only now that Aemond undoes the stone he walled himself in and acts as he always does when he feels belittled, or worse, threatened. He shuts her out.

“I’m afraid my wife is growing tired, brother. ’Tis best for her to retire.”

She bites her tongue and turns her head. There’s no mistake in his tone, that is an order. She stares at him and he stares back, blankly, and then, just as it is expected of her, she obeys.

She goes without saying a word, aware of Aemond’s eye on her, of Aegon’s little victorious giggle. He snaps his fingers and two dancing girls flock to his brother. She knows this because she can’t resist but turning before disappearing. The girls are said to come from Lys, no less. But he’s not sparing them a single glance. His eye follows her out of the hall, and even after.

Candles almost extinguished, casting a soft glow in the bedchamber, dim but enough to make the shape of her body visible under the covers.

“I know you’re pretending to be asleep.” He says, placing his dagger and eyepatch on the nightstand.

She doesn’t bother to wait a single moment to fly her eyes open. “Was I not supposed to pretend I was tired?”

When she gets no answer, she turns to face him, finding him on his feet near the bed, undoing the buttons of his doublet. His eye is on her, though, wide, as someone ready to hunt but seeing traps everywhere.

“Did you enjoy your feast?” she asks with piqued interest. “Such a shame that I missed most of it. I was eager to watch the girls from Lys dance. How were they?”

“Enough. You should thank me for dismissing you. You were bordering on high treason.”

“Since when telling the truth is considered high treason?”

“Is that what you were going to say? The truth? To make me look like a fool in front of the whole court?”

“I was only going to say that the feast was an insult and a challenge to the Gods or any common sense. And I know that beneath all the pats on the shoulder and the endorsement on your brother’s part, you are of the same mind.” she hopes to see the barest glimpse of validation on his face, at least here, where he can leave behind his pride and admit he made a mistake. Is that what you call starting a war?

But his expression is as closed as ever, wary.

She wishes it would hurt less than it does. “Of all the people ready to betray you, how quick you are to assume I’d be the first.”

“We’re bound by words, are we not?”

“Take your brother off your mouth.” She says absentmindedly; she tries to not let it sting, but it does anyway. It is a low blow, and she knows he does not believe it. He has raised the walls, coiling like a snake, and there’s no point trying to climb and risk cracking her skull open on the ground. She will have to wait for him to come down. “Then perhaps I should consider my father’s proposal.”

She leaves the bed and grabs a letter lying open on the desk. “He wrote me this letter. That is why my mother came all the way here, apparently to see how her daughter was faring.”

Aemond eyes it with the barest twitch in his lips, then looks up into her eyes and, with a sigh, she clears her throat.

“My dearest daughter,

It is with great concern and sadness that I write you this letter.

Words have reached me about the recent events involving Storm’s End and young Prince Lucerys’ demise. My spirits are low when thinking of the fate you’re enduring. But I want you to think carefully of this: annulments are rare but possible. Even more so since you bore no heirs yet. You cannot remain married to a Kinslayer, it is the highest of sins. I only need a word from you, daughter, and I shall hastily consult with a High Septon.”

She can barely register his arm moving, only sees his hand snatching the letter out of her grip, crumpling the paper between his fingers. Nostrils flaring, eye widening, she reads insult all over his face. About time.

“Is that it, Aemond? Is that the reason you’d think I would betray you? Because I didn’t bleed on a birthing bed yet? Is that how you measure my loyalty? What of all the times I drew your bath, washed your hair, pulled the boots off your feet? What about that curtain—“ she adds, pointing to the windows “and the fact that I told the maid to keep that side always closed so the sun will not bother your eye? Do you think I did all of this because of some empty words?”

He looks as if she has just slapped him. Mistrust and bewilderment run together all over his sharp features, trying to win one another, and she waits and waits, and she begs as all the purest things must be pleaded, wordlessly.

Come down. Come down. Lay down with me. In our bed, a grave, it matters not. I'll take the shovel and do the burying.

But he stands still on his high and cursed perch, the grip on the letter loosens, his shoulders slump a little, because this, this comes so easily. Violence. It’s the other glove he wears like second skin.

“You will write to your father and tell him if I hear another word about annulments, I will have his head for treason. And as for you… you tell a living soul what you know, and you shall join the Silent Sisters. You won’t even have to vow your silence, for I shall take your sharp tongue first.”

She watches him go, standing in the middle of the room like a fool; her hands bleeding still and a plea, unheard, choking to death in her chest.

Her hands heal, stay whole for so long. She feels she cannot reach him this time, no matter how hard she tries to climb. She finds no footholds, no inlets, until she stops looking for any.

She finds she has no strength to do it anymore. They’re all dead anyway, each of them in their own way, their own burial.

The king drinks and rages and drinks and rages. Helaena rocks on herself all day long, chasing the highs and lows of her laments. Jaehaera stares at her mother with her small lips sewn, her eyes wide and the Queen Mother weeps and weeps, wondering if the little girl is watching her mother go mad with grief or yet again her twin brother’s head rolling on the ground like one of her toys.

And Aemond…she does not know where Aemond chose to bury himself. He spends the day out, trying to escape the smothering grip of the Stranger’s claws, his curse…or is it only retribution?

Sometimes he’s in the training yard, sometimes that same yard becomes theater for revenge. He kills whoever helped Blood and Cheese enter the Keep, man or woman, he doesn’t care. He tortures them, and she wants to beg him to stop, to tell him that torturing one, two, or one hundred men won’t stop guilt from torturing him.

So, he wanders restlessly, basks in small and big cruelties, until the sun sets and she’s aware, as the bed dips under his weight, that she is his own burial. He takes her at any time, in any place, be it the bed, the desk, or bent over the vanity, she cannot do anything to stop him. She doesn’t want to and yet she aches to do it. Because it’s always sudden, and harsh and hurtful when he pulls her hair, when he spares no time to stoke her desire, when he keeps her bent with her back turned and a firm hand on her neck like some kind of punishment.

It never used to be like this. It had been playful, teasing, painfully slow as if he were separating salt from water, and then fast, urgent, unraveling for two inexperienced newlyweds.

But it had never been like that. There was no joy in it. Only a duty to be fulfilled. Some twisted way to gain control, while anyone else kept slipping from his hands. Just as Vhagar slipped out of his control on that fateful night of storm.

He remembered that dark thrill pounding in his veins, the laughter gushing out of his throat like poison. He couldn’t bring himself to stop. He didn’t know whether Vhagar was fueling his fire or the other way around, perhaps both. Just a little more, he’d thought, as Arrax batted his wings frantically, desperate, mirroring his young rider, to escape the gaping jaws of the Queen of All Dragons.

That’s what he wanted. He wanted to relish in his nephew’s dread, he wanted to drink it. He wanted him alone, desperate, hopeless, just as he had been.

And then he felt it, the shift in the ancient fire pit he was riding, like a boat tipping over and there was no helm to grab onto and bring it back to land. He had sunk his own family into the bleak abyss of Daemon Targaryen’s soul.

He had come to collect, thoroughly. A son for a son, yes, but he had taken much more than Jaehaerys. He’d taken Helaena as well. Even Jaehaera.

Will she ever be able to speak again?

Will my Mother ever forgive me?

Words never spoken, stuck on his tongue and then gagged and swallowed. He cannot look down, cannot look back. He must look up and forward, like soldiers do. To the next battle, to war.

But there’s this woman. And the sight of her in his bed that makes his breath hitch and for two reasons entirely opposite to one another. The first is the most ancient one. But she’s also a thorn in his side, for she knows. She knows everything. She knows all his peaks and depths, every brick in his walls and how to dismantle them; she knows he’s strong and weak, that he’s scared and guilty and worthy of his mother’s contempt, but he cannot bear any of this in front of her.

He flees her presence during the day, only to impose himself on her for the whole night. She cannot refuse him. And he cannot have her prying and dismantling his well-crafted walls and lies, so he takes her and takes her and takes her until he works themselves up to exhaustion and she’s a rag doll in his hands. It serves the purpose, though. As long as she has his cock in her mouth, as long as he harshly pounds into her, cutting her breath from the inside, she cannot ask questions. As long as he keeps chasing his pleasure, and his rugged breaths muffle his own ears, he cannot think straight.  

He's close now and it’s the second time already. The sheets are damp beneath their bodies, his back glints with sweat, damps his forehead as he thrusts inside her one more time. They’re lying on their side, but he keeps her caged against him, his arm has slipped on the mattress and under her neck to keep her still, with her back to him. With his cheek glued to hers, he croons praises in her ear, falling mindlessly from his lips but like drops in the ocean. Once, she would redden, smile blissfully, or challenge him, to go deeper, or harder, or both, but she’s a limp thing now. A mere body panting upon being fucked by another, that’s all.

This is possession. Or a desperate attempt to. Each night, he holds her as if it’s the last time and she could slip away from him at any moment, turning her back on him. She can feel it now, in the way he’s gripping her shoulder, the way his nails dig in her skin, carving into her bones: stay with me. Please. Don’t leave. Please, don’t leave.

But it’s him keeping her away, turning her own back on him.

Don’t you know, she wishes to tell him, that I won’t, ever. I won’t. No matter how cursed you are. I won’t. I won’t.

He grabs her thigh, resting it on his hip, spreading his long fingers on her skin, spreading her legs so he can find the perfect angle and picks up the pace. She shudders with every thrust, gasping with her throat dry, feeling the long bridge of his nose sinking in her cheek, his grunts growing rougher and deeper; some strange choked sound at the back of his throat.

He comes quietly, panting shallowly against the damp fabric of her nightgown. And he stays there, claw gripping her shoulder, head sunk between her neck and collarbone, and deep to the hilt buried in her.

A tear rolls down her cheek. She doesn’t know where it comes from, who she is mourning, she can’t tell these days. Perhaps she’s mourning him, who he was, who he is now and who he is forcing himself to be. She doesn’t know where the deception lies anymore. She wishes she could push it back in, prays that it goes unnoticed, swallowed along with all the others, but she should know by now, the Gods are not in her favor anymore, if they ever had been.

“Why are you crying?”

She turns her head, and her breath hitches. The gemstone glints, yes, but she’s too struck by his eye to even notice the sapphire. There’s something raw there, bare, more than his very skin now. It’s the first time she sees that look on him, torn, heavy lidded and not by pleasure.

This is the burden of grief.

She wonders if that’s the reason he’s so keen on fucking her with her back turned, so she can’t see him. Perhaps she didn’t look hard enough. She thought he had risen too high, out of her reach, of anyone’s. She thought he would never fall, not in every sense of the word.

Hence, she’s at a loss for words, slightly pulling herself up, when he slowly comes down; he curls into himself, into her lap, resting his head there like a child. No Kinslayer, no Dragon Prince, no son, no brother. No husband. Just a human, bare in the skin and soul.

Aemond wraps his hand around her knee, gently, and then tighter and tighter, shutting his eye. He’s on land now, but the room is spinning, the whole world is spinning and he doesn’t know how to stop it. He feels he started it all, he threw a spinning top and got sucked into it. And she’s the only firm thing he can hold onto.

“Do you think I’m cursed?” he whispers, the barest flutter of his long eyelashes against his cheekbone.

But she has no answer. All she has are her hands, sliding on his naked skin, through his loose hair, gently, as if touching the thinnest glass, sealing the cracks. Her palms slice open again.  

“Aren’t we all?”

And I dream of a grave, deep and narrow, where we could clasp each other in our arms as with clamps, and I would hide my face in you and you would hide your face in me, and nobody would ever see us any more."

- The Castle, Franz Kafka.

[prettyinlimegreenboots]

Taking Comfort (In Your Arms) - Chapter 4

June 24, 2025 1400 hours

Something big was going to happen, the energy on base indicated that but what it was, no one knew. Rumors were abundant but it was just rumors. Addie felt it as she worked away from the tower, squadron leaders being herded into one of the two Colonel’s offices one after another that afternoon. She heaved a sigh of relief when neither Bucky nor Buck made an appearance.

Finally, her father came out of his office, pausing at Addie’s desk. “Are you free for a bit? I need you to take these notes to a couple of the men - Turner, Veal, Bucky, and Buck. Are you able to track them down and get them these notes?”

“I’m sure these missives can wait a bit longer to be sent.” She smirked, showing him a pile of papers. Taking them off her hands, he rapidly flipped through them, shaking his head, giving her a vexed look. “Addie, these were supposed to be sent earlier this morning.”

She gave her father an irritated look, rolling her eyes. “I had three piles of papers awaiting for me this morning - these, the emergency notices to the squadron leaders and the supply orders for the infirmary. Of those, these seemed to be the least urgent. I apologize that these notices didn’t get sent earlier.”

“Josie, can you get these sent out for Addie?” Her father turned and looked at her best friend who was smirking, before passing the missives to her. “Sure Colonel.”

Turning back to his daughter, he handed her the folded notes and a set of jeep keys. “Deliver these quickly, please.”

Saluting her father, she accepted the four folded notes. Addie slipped on her aviators as she made her way out of the tower, skipping down the stairs, jumping into the nearest jeep. Driving down the path, wind whipping her hair, she tried to figure out where she’d find all four of the Majors. The mess would be empty by now due to the hour so she headed to the barracks. Pulling the jeep up to Bucky’s barrack, she killed the engine, trying to figure out how she’d let him know she was there.

Getting out of the jeep, she leaned against it, enjoying the sunshine and light breeze knowing someone would eventually come by and she could ask them. Twenty minutes later she spotted Meatball coming over to her, jumping and whining for attention. Crouching down, she petted him, giving him a few pats, glad she had worn pants today. “Captain, it’s good to see you out of the office on a day like this.”

Looking up and over her aviators, she grinned seeing DeMarco come closer to her. “Captain DeMarco, they finally let me out of the chicken coop.”

“Not that I don’t love seeing you out in the wild, what are you doing here?” He asked, chuckling as Meatball came and sat at his feet.

Standing to her full height, Addie smiled. “Looking for Turner, Veal, Bucky, or Buck and since I’m not allowed in the barracks, I was hoping one of you boys would point me in the right direction.”

“Veal and Turner are in the classroom with the navigators. Buck and Bucky should be inside - give me a moment.” He said, speedily ducking into the barrack. It wasn’t a moment later she heard. “Yo lover boy your girl’s waiting outside for you.”

She was still chuckling when Bucky made his way outside, quickly pulling her up into his arms with a laugh. He gave her a quick hug and a kiss to the side of her head, putting her feet back on the ground. “Well, this is a welcome surprise.”

“I’ve come to deliver missives to you and Buck and I can’t dillydally.” She gave him a look, letting him know who’s directive that was, standing on her tiptoes to press a quick kiss to his lips. “Can you get Buck for me?”

“That’s not what a guy wants to hear after he gets a kiss from his gal.” Bucky teased but obediently went and got his best friend.

She watched him leave, shamelessly loving the way his rear looked in his pants, not that he would ever know. She casually leaned against the jeep, crossing one ankle over the other, attempting to settle her racing heart. Bucky returned with Buck on his heels. “Bucky mentioned you have something for us.”

She handed them the folded notes with their names on it. She held her breath as she watched them read the note, glance at one another before looking at her. Buck held up the note between two fingers, arching an eyebrow in curiosity. “Know anything about this?”

Shaking her head, sighing she looked between the two of them. “Tower has been a fury of activity since this morning but just like you, I’m kept in the dark and know nothing but I have a feeling something big is happening.”

“We’ve been called to a meeting at 1600.” Bucky said, folding the note back up.

“That makes sense - I have two more notes to deliver.” She saluted them, getting back into the jeep. “I’ll see you boys later.”

Buck laughed while Bucky pulled her in for a quick kiss before watching her drive away. Addie tracked down Tucker and Veal, in the classroom Nissian hut, just as DeMarco said they would be.

Before long, she was back up in the tower, head down working away. Just before 1600, her father and Huglin left, leaving Josie to raise an eyebrow in Addie’s direction. “I have no idea - the boys told me there’s a meeting at 1600 hours but what it’s concerning I have no idea. I’m guessing there’s a mission coming in the next couple of days.”

“I’m sure we’ll know soon enough.” Josie sighed, eyes widened with a mixture of fear and worry as Addie eyed her wearily. “What’s going on with you Josie? Something on your mind?”

Josie’s eyes widened in a way that clued Addie that something else was going on. “Spill, Josephine.”

“DeMarco asked me out.” She bit her lip, while watching her best friend.

Addie’s jaw dropped a bit. Sure she had been wrapped up with Bucky the last few days but how had she not seen DeMarco make a move on her best friend. “How do you feel about that?”

“I mean the man is gorgeous and Meatball is the best.” Josie gushed, a light blush on her cheeks.

Addie walked over and leaned against her desk. “There’s a but in there, Josie. What’s got you all in a tizzy?”

“What if …” Trailing off, her eyes slowly met Addie’s.

Addie shook her head, stopping that line of thought immediately. “You were the one that always told me don’t think about the what if’s. So that’s exactly what I’m telling you. Don’t think about it and just follow your heart. DeMarco is a good catch - I think you should tell him yes. You don’t have to go out a second time if you don’t want to but I do think you should go out on the first one.”

Addie tapped Josie’s desk, leaving her friend with her thoughts as she went back to her desk. Not wanting her mind to wander, she dove into missives that had been left that needed action taken on them, hoping the rest of the afternoon would pass quickly.

2000 hours

A note was waiting on her bunk after dinner requesting her to meet on the tarmac. Slipping on her sweater she made her way out of the barracks. She saw him standing near a fort, looking up at it lost in thought.

Siding up to him, she just stood there, not wanting to scare him. He let out a gush of air, not turning to her as he said, “The boys’ first mission is tomorrow - Bremen.”

“Shit.” Was all that she could say. She knew it was coming - it was only a matter of time before they’d be sent up. Addie for the first time in a long time was at a loss of what to say. She knew she couldn’t say a damn thing that would help Bucky prepare for tomorrow. All she could do was be there for him.

Slipping her hand in his, she gave it a squeeze, while wrapping an arm around his back. He looked down at her, wiping his face with his other hand, sighing loudly, worry clearly written all over his face. “What do I tell him?”

“You give him a reason to make it home. Don’t tell him about what it’s like, that’ll just scare him but you give him a damn good reason to make it home alive.” She looked up at him, squeezing his hand. “We knew this day would be coming. Doesn’t make it any easier.”

Sighing, he tilted his head back, hoping to find the right answer written on the underbelly of the fort. “You’re right.”

“I haven’t been in combat, only you have. You’ve seen it with your two eyes. Somehow you’ll find the words tomorrow before he goes up.” Addie whispered. “What are you planning on doing while you wait for them to return?”

Shrugging, Bucky looked out across the tarmac with narrowed eyes. “Not sure, haven’t thought that far ahead. What usually happens when we’re up?”

“Everyone attempts to get something done - paperwork, usually but most everyone is preoccupied by worrying about who won’t return.” She confided in him, squeezing his hand to keep him present with her instead of letting his mind wander. “Come see me tomorrow and I’ll give you some of my old ATA files to read - won’t completely take your mind off of what’s going on but it’ll give you something to do.”

Bucky pulled his attention away from the tarmac, looking at the gorgeous girl that stood beside him. “Your old ATA files?”

“Shhh . . . I took some with me when I left. No one is going to miss them but figured someday I’d look back on that time with nothing but fondness, and not anger.” She smirked. “Buck told me you were proud of me - thought you might want to know what your girl did before she got kicked out of the service.”

Bucky nodded. “I’ll be by your desk once everything settles down tomorrow morning.”

All she could do was nod, picking up that he clearly wasn’t in the mood to talk. “Want me to leave you alone?”

“That is the absolute last thing I want you to do.” He looked apologetic at her. “Sorry I’m not in the mood to talk.”

Tugging on his hand, she got him moving. “No apology needed. Let’s just walk - you’ve got a lot on your mind and need to sort through it.”

As they passed by “Wild Cargo”, she smiled. “I buzzed the tower in a B-17 called “Sweater Jean”. She was the B-17 I flew from London to Ridgewell, which is in Essex, the base I was stationed at. Before I left, I had finally passed my last evaluation, which gave me the certificate to fly the big girls. As tradition, whenever you first fly a new class of planes, you have to buzz the tower and I did it at my home base. The brass didn’t even yell at me since I was the first of the ATAs stationed there to fly the Class 5’s.”

“The first?” Bucky asked, eyes widened slightly, impressed by the girl that still managed to take his breath away. How did he get so lucky to call Captain Adelaide Baker his? He still didn’t understand and often had a hard time believing it.

“I was the first but that didn’t last long. My friends Anna and Lydia soon joined me in the Class 5’s.” She smirked. “The days of flying the Class 5’s were long - usually there wasn’t a direct transport back to base so those were the days that I mixed planes with trains or cars.”

Bucky squeezed her hand. “Were you often gone longer than a day?”

“Not usually but there was one ferry that I didn’t get back to base until 4 days after I left.” She smiled, thinking back on that long day, wistfully. “That one I was all over England - started in Norfolk, went to Lincolnshire, then London and ended up in West Sussex. Had to take two trains back to Essex. I was back for 12 hours before I ferried a Spitfire back to London and the circus started all over again.”

“You didn’t fly across the channel did you?” Bucky questioned, voice clearing a bit as her story distracted him.

“No. It was very regulated on where I could or couldn’t go. I flew all over England but never into combat territory.” She bit her lip. “It used to frustrate me that they kept us so contained but I’d give anything to be back up flying.”

“My next leave, I’ll take you flying.” He promised, giving her a hopeful look. “Or you can take me for a ride in your Tiger Moth.”

Squeezing his hand, she grinned. “Deal but how about you take me dancing first, hotshot? We’re going to make it through this Bucky.”

“Yes to the dancing; let’s make it through tomorrow first. You’re right. I should head back to the barracks, early night and all.” His voice was quiet, her eyes finding his. “Are you ready to head back?”

Shaking her head, she met his eyes. “I’ll head back up with you.”

Silence followed them as they made their way back up to the huts. Pulling Bucky into her arms, leaning up to place a gentle kiss on his lips, her hand on his cheek forcing him to meet her eyes. “I know you’re going to be worried tonight but try to get some sleep. Come see me after everything tomorrow.”

“I’ll be there. Thank you, Addie.” He said sincerely, stealing another kiss before he slipped into the barracks.

Sighing, she ran her hands through her hair. She was dreading tomorrow and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do but be there for Bucky. Not a word of comfort would help the situation. She just wished she could be as strong as he had been every day since she met him.

As she turned to head back to her hut, she heard her name being called. Looking over her shoulder, she smiled seeing DeMarco, Buck and Meatball making their way towards her. “Gents, Meatball.”

“Where’s your sidekick?” DeMarco joked while she squatted down and petted the dog, lapping up the attention.

Motioning to the hut, she smiled. “Inside, I just dropped him off.”

“I wanted to check with you to see if you’re able to keep an eye on Meatball tomorrow?” DeMarco questioned, giving her a pleading look.

Laughing at his face, Addie instantly agreed. “Of course - I was going to offer but you beat me to the punch. He can hang out in the office with me and Josie.”

The blush instantly crossed his cheeks at the mention of her best friend. Keeping that in her back pocket, she would have to get an update from Josie on how that went. “Thank you Addie. I appreciate it.”

“I’ll grab him after breakfast from you.” She promised, as he wished her and Buck good night before heading inside.

Buck eyed her as the door shut before turning his attention to Addie, voice quiet to keep the secret between them. “Know anything about the blush that crept up his face when you mentioned Josie?”

“Potentially, remains to be seen.” She smirked. “Josie is my best friend and it seems your captain is sweet on her. More to come.”

Buck nodded, watching the sun start its descent. “How’s Bucky?”

“You picked up on his quietness?” Addie turned, looking at him with curiosity in her eyes.

He smiled. “He thinks he’s a great actor but I’ve known something was up since we got out of that meeting earlier today. Did he talk with you?”

“We walked the tarmac earlier. I talked and he listened.” She weakly smiled. “He’s worried Buck - I’m not going to lie and say he’s fine, but he’s worried. Just promise me you’ll do everything you can to come back.”

Buck was silent, taking her words in. John Egan loved big and when you were in his inner circle, you were in. It had been a long time since Buck had someone new to worry about him. Sure, he had Marge and Buck but looks like he had another person in his corner. “I promise Addie, I’ll do everything I can to come home to him, you and Marge.”

“Marge? Got a girl back home, Gale Cleven?” She smiled, eyes widening at the little tidbit.

Nodding, his smile and eyes brightened. “I do. I’ll have to tell you all about her.”

“I look forward to that.” She gave him a look. “And I’ll tell you about my ATA time.”

He gave her a salute. “Sounds like a plan Addie.”

Without another thought, she pulled him in for a hug, giving him a tight squeeze. “Be safe, Gale.”

Hugging her back, he promised he would and that he would tease her tomorrow afternoon for worrying once they got back. She laughed at that, fully intending to hold him to that promise. With a quiet good night, he left her there, ducking into the hut. Wiping the unshed tears away, she shook her head before walking back to her barracks. Too many tears had been shed already and she was biting her lip to keep more from falling.

The hut was quiet as she got ready for bed. She wrote in her journal while the hut grew quiet around her. With a long sigh, she turned off her light, settling in knowing she would be getting very little sleep that night.

0400 hours

She had been tossing and turning for the last hour. She heard the jeeps roar to life as they moved around the base, heading to go wake up the pilots that were flying today.

Quietly getting out of bed, she got dressed hastily. Slipping on her shoes and her coat, she closed the door to the hut, shivering from the bitter coldness of the morning.

“Addie?” A voice called as she whirled around, not expecting anyone she’d know to be up so early. She smiled weakly seeing her father walk towards her, a mug of coffee in his hand. “What are you doing out here so early?”

“Couldn’t sleep.” She admitted, tugging her coat tighter around her attempting to ward off the chill.

“The boys are about to go into the briefing.” Her eyes widened. “If you stand in the back, you can get a glimpse of what will happen today and maybe that’ll calm you down?”

She couldn’t speak. Merely nodding, she followed her father to the hut, going in and immediately turning to the right, heading to the very back. One of the Red Cross girls gave her a mug of coffee, Addie smiled thankfully at her before she moved along.

She caught sight of Bucky and Buck walking in behind Huglin, taking their seats up front. “The target for today is Bremen.”

Taking a deep breath, Addie steadied herself listening to Huglin go into the details and the importance of the mission. “The 350th will be in high position with Major Cleven as lead pilot.”

Murmuring a ‘shit’ under her breath, she knew that wouldn’t calm Bucky down in the least. She knew and trusted Buck to be just as he’d been since she met him, cool and calm under pressure.

With the briefing wrapping up, she promptly slipped out, waiting by the door to meet Meatball and DeMarco. Just as she saw him, he called out to her. “Addie!”

She watched him let go of Meatball’s lead as he bounded over to her, excitedly jumping on her to get attention. “Morning Meatball, Captain.” Leaning over, she carded her hand through the fluffy fur, giving Meatball plenty of pats.

“Morning Addie. Thanks for watching him.” DeMarco wandered over with a bright smile on his face. He patted his thigh, calling to Meatball, petting the fluffy dog, crouching down and giving him a hug, murmuring sweet nothings to the puppy.

She gave him a moment, grinning watching the interaction. “Anytime. Benny, be safe out there today. And I’ll see you all later on today.”

Standing, he saluted her with a smirk. “See you later Addie. Don’t be too bored without us.”

She nodded, saluting him, taking Meatball’s lead in her hand, watching as DeMarco caught up with his crew, slapping some on the backs in greeting. Scanning the area, her eyes caught Buck and Bucky talking and hesitated, knowing it was good for them both to have that moment. Not wanting to linger, she dragged Meatball away, heading towards the tower.

Walking up the tower steps, she ducked inside, avoiding everyone who was already on the tower’s platform waiting for the green light. Unclipping Meatball’s lead, he settled at her feet while she stared blankly at her desk. This was the first mission she knew someone specifically in the line up. The first mission that potentially had someone she called a friend that wasn’t coming home.

Willing herself not to go down that path and to start crying, she looked up at the ceiling and forced herself to think of something else. Cherished family memories, her times in a plane, anything to not start crying in that moment.

The door slammed, catching her attention as she whirled around. Sighing, she was happy for a moment to see Josie standing, until she realized Josie had mixed emotions on her face. “You okay?”

“Trying to be.” Addie admitted. Raising an eyebrow, Addie tried to get a read on Josie. “You?”

Putting down her purse, she came over to Addie’s desk and leaned against it. “Ran into DeMarco on my way here.” Meatball, hearing his owner's name, came to nuzzle Josie’s hand, offering the girl some comfort.

“And?” Addie perked up a bit. “I saw him about 20 minutes ago when I got Meatball.”

Josie smiled, weakly. “I must’ve just missed you. We talked, I gave him a kiss on the cheek and told him I’d love to go on a date with him.”

Squealing, Addie jumped up and pulled her best friend into a hug as she laughed excitedly, accidentally pushing Meatball away. He went to lay in the corner away from the temporary excitement with a huff. “Ahh I’m so excited you told him yes. What did he say?”

“I think I startled him.” She grinned, stepping away from Addie’s desk. “He didn’t say much before Bucky yelled at him to get in the truck. By the way, you should have a word with your Major about his potty mouth.” Addie raised an eyebrow at that. “It’s not very gentlemanly.”

Snorting, Addie shook her head. “That’ll go over as well as a lead balloon.”

“He promised me he’d come back and that he’d see me later today.” Josie sighed. “I don’t know how you’re so calm right now. I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my chest and they haven’t even left yet.”

Addie exhaled, pulling Josie into a hug. “I don’t have any advice. I didn’t know Bucky went up the previous times until he was already in the air and we weren’t together during those times. I’m just trying to stay busy and keep my mind off of today - there’s nothing I can say to you or Bucky that’ll help today but I’m here if you need anything.”

“Are you going out there to watch?” Josie quietly asked, stepping back.

Shaking her head, Addie frowned. “No, not today. But you can if you want.”

“No I don’t want that ….” She trailed off, shaking her head. Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself, attempting to hyping herself up to face the day.

The next hour passed slowly as the girls attempted to treat it just like a normal day. Addie reviewed supply requests from around the base while Josie attempted to schedule several meetings with Colonels from other bases.

Looking up from the paperwork, she saw Bucky hand on the rails with his head hanging. She saw him exhale deeply, averting her attention, not wanting to be caught looking at him.

Grabbing a stack of papers, she pushed away from the desk, went to the filing cabinets and started filing just so she was up, moving and keeping her mind occupied. The door opening caught her attention, willing herself to focus on the task instead of looking to see who it was. “Ladies.”

Bucky had made his way inside, standing near the door with a peculiar look on his face. She couldn’t read the expression on his face and that instantly put her on edge. She usually could read him and not being able to left her uneasy. He looked like he was going to lose it at any moment. Ignoring the scattered papers, she crossed the room, pulling him into her arms, protocol be damned at this moment. She wrapped her arms around his broad shoulder, fingers playing with the wisps of hair on his neck while his arms wrapped around her waist. He buried his head in the juncture between her neck and shoulders and exhaled loudly. As they stood there, the tension in his shoulders eased a bit and she could feel him relax slightly as she ran her fingers through his hair. “I got you.”

They stood in the embrace for minutes, hours. Addie lost track of time until Bucky pulled back, swiping at his face, exhaling loudly. “Thank you.”

“I’m not going to ask you anything but go sit in my chair and find the green folder. That’s what I promised you.” She whispered, giving him a nudge towards her desk. Walking over to the small table in the corner, she poured coffee into a mug before setting it on the desk, within his reach.

Without another word, she went back to the cabinet, continuing to file the papers. She caught Josie’s eye and shook her head, knowing there was nothing either of them could say.

For the next hour, the only noise was the flipping of paper from Bucky, opening another cabinet from Addie and the methodically clicking of keys from Josie as she typed. Each of them were lost in their own thoughts as the hour slowly passed by.

Josie pushed up from her desk, slapped her hand to her thigh and softly called for Meatball. “I can’t sit here another minute. I’m taking him out for a long walk and some fresh air.”

Nodding, Addie watched them leave before looking over at Bucky who had his lip pulled between his teeth. Finishing up the last of the filing, she took a seat in the chair in front of her desk and watched him as he read. The slight widening of his eyes as he took in her exploits or the grin that tugged at his lips as he read a comment or addition to the report. A snort escaped his lips as he flipped a page, making her file that for later so he could tell her what caused him to make the noise.

It was another twenty minutes before he looked up to see her sitting there. “Bluebird, you’re lucky you didn’t get demoted earlier than February.”

“I wasn’t that bad.” She scoffed, raising an eyebrow in a challenge.

Bucky threw his head back and laughed. “You barrel rolled a Supermarine Spitfire, Addie. That should have gotten you thrown out and sent back home, which would have been absolutely devastating for me. How did you not get your ass handed to you?”

“Pure luck I’m guessing.” She shrugged. “Do you see why I didn’t fly them long before I got the big birds? Couldn’t do a barrel roll in a fort.”

Chuckling, Bucky held up the folder. “Thank you for sharing this with me. Helped to know what you are capable of doing. I’d be honored to fly with you on any mission, Captain.”

“Not anytime soon, I’m afraid.” Frowning, she shrugged.

Bucky snorted, leaning back in her chair, stretching out his long legs. “It’s a damn shame they’ve grounded you Captain.”

She hummed in approval, looking at his almost relaxed face. “When are the boys supposed to be back?”

“Not until after lunch. How is it only 0900?” He groaned, throwing his head back, exhaling loudly. “Sorry Bluebird but I don’t know how you do this every single time.”

“To be fair, this is the first one I specially know people up there.” She gave him a pointed look. “I didn’t know you were up there until just before you touched back down. Someone failed to tell me that.”

He had the decency to look abash, giving her a wide grin. “Didn’t want you to be worried, Bluebird.”

“And you didn’t think I was worried when I heard the 389th took you up?” She shook her head, disbelief in her eyes, giving him a look. “John Egan, you had already charmed me at that point. You didn’t think I cared for you?”

He shrugged, sitting up in her chair. “I had hoped that you liked me but you were standoffish until I got to know you in the fort that night. After that night, I knew I had a chance with you and knew I couldn’t blow it.”

“You’ve been alright.” She teased, causing him to pop up from the chair and pulling her into his embrace with a squeal. His fingers found purchase on her sides, her eyes widened in horror. “Bucky, John no.”

He didn’t heed her warning as his fingers wiggled, causing her to shriek and laugh. Attempting to push away from him, she failed, as he kept one arm wrapped around her. “I take back what I said. You’ve been more than alright. A true gentleman and a great boyfriend.”

“You’re ticklish.” He stated the obvious, a wicked grin crossing his lips. “Filing that information for later. Though I half expected Colonel Baker to make an appearance.”

Waving a dismissive hand, Addie shook her head. “He’s in Manchester for the day at some brass meeting. I wasn’t really paying attention when he told me. You and Bowman are in charge.”

“Let’s just hope Bowman stays in the command center for the rest of the day.” Bucky wickedly grinned.

Smirking, Addie knew that was a long shot. “You know he’ll be up here as the boys are supposed to be back.”

“Then I guess we’re going to get all nervous energy out before he comes up.” Bucky pulled her flush against his chest, leaning down and capturing her lips in a steamy kiss.

Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she stood on her tiptoes, leaning up to kiss him again. He settled against her desk, making it easier for her to kiss him in the new position. Running her fingers through the curls at the nap of his neck, he groaned in the kiss, deeping it slightly. Sighing, she broke away, looking into his baby blues. “Damn Bucky.”

“You took the words from my mouth.” He sighed, leaning up to kiss her again.

1300 hours

“Twelve . . . thirteen . . . fourteen . . . fifteen.” Her and Meatball stood in the tower’s shadow, counting the planes as they touched down. She didn’t know which crews were in which planes but seeing them touchdown slightly calmed her racing heart.

Hearing footfalls on the stairs, she turned, watching Bucky grin, stepping onto the grass. “Buck made it back. I’m heading out there to go meet him, take him to interrogation. Want to come?”

Shaking her head, she exhaled slowly at those words. “No, you should go see him. I’ll see him in a bit but thank you for telling me. Any word on the others?”

“Blakely and DeMarco were others I heard call through.” Bucky grinned. “I’ve got to get out there but see you later?”

Emotional, Addie threw her arms around Bucky’s shoulders, sniffling. He put a hand on her chin, tilting it up, placing a soft kiss on her lips. “You sure you don’t want to lay eyes on him yourself?”

“There’ll be plenty of time for that. He’s probably in shock and needs to see you first. I’ll see him at dinner and the club.” She grinned, tension leaving her shoulders at the happy return. “I’ll walk over to the interrogation hut, gotta give Meatball back to DeMarco.”

Kissing her again, gave Meatball a few pats before heading to the Jeep to head to the tarmac. She watched him leave, fingers touching her lips at the tingling his kisses left. Chuckling to herself, still trying to wrap her head around the enigma Bucky Egan was and how he was hers.

Picking up Meatball’s lead, they started walking towards the interrogation hut. She steadied herself for the haunted looks she knew the men would have as they entered. Looking out over the tarmac, she watched the crews inspect each of the B-17s, making notes of what needed to be repaired and which forts needed to be sent out for further repairs than the base could handle. Life continued on, even with the black clouds hanging over their heads.

She pulled herself out of the downhearted mood nearing the hut. Plastering a half smile on her face, she nodded at Tatty as she handed her a mug of coffee. “You doing alright?”

“Glad they made it back.” She took a sip of coffee, hissing when it hit the roof of her mouth. Tatty nodded, someone calling her name. Tatty gave her a small smile, touching her arm, making her way to the hut.

Tugging on Meatball’s lead, she went to lean on a jeep, waiting for the boys to appear. She knew they would be coming out of the side door. Settling in, she shook her head, wishing the awful thoughts she had most of the morning would go away. She knew it wouldn’t be the last time she’d see the men go up but happy for the moment that they came home.

“Addie!” The yell came, starling her, dropping Meatball’s lead, watching the puppy run happily to his owner. DeMarco dropped to the ground to catch the puppy as he barked and licked his owner.

Tears sprung to her eyes at the reunion, making her way over to DeMarco, an excited grin plastered on his face. “Welcome back Captain.”

“Thank you! And thank you for watching him. I’m guessing he was good?” Benny looked up at her.

Smirking, she gave him a look. “He hung out with Josie most of the time.”

“That’s good that he was able to keep you both company.” Benny stood, giving Addie a mixed look of confusion and elation.

Addie took a step closer to him, a serious look on her face. “I know you asked Josie out - do not break my best friend’s heart, Benny. You break her heart, I kick your ass.”

DeMarco had the decency to look a little bit scared of her, taking her words to heart. Immediately, schooling his features, he returned to the cool suave she had always known from him. A grin tugged on his lips. “She told you about that?”

“There’s very little that goes on within this base that I don’t know about, Benny. Just remember that and make sure your men know that as well.” She raised an eyebrow. “Josie is my best girl and she’s been hurt in the past. Don’t hurt her, Benny, I’m begging you.”

Benny nodded, meeting her eyes. “I promise, I won’t hurt her. She’s in charge, wherever this might go.”

“Good man.” She patted his shoulder. “Have you seen either of the Bucks?”

DeMarco chuckled, loving how promptly she changed the subject. “They were still in interrogation when I left but they should be wrapping up. You’ll be at the club later?”

“I think that’s the plan.” She nodded. “Glad you’re back Benny.”

Watching him walk off, she leaned against the jeep throwing her head back, soaking in the sunshine, taking a moment to herself. Looking at her watch, she sighed seeing that it was only 0139. “Adelaide Baker!”

Tilting her head, she squinted from behind the aviators to see who fully named her. Her face broke into a bright grin seeing the two Bucks walking towards her. Pushing off the jeep, she rushed towards Buck, throwing her arms around him. “Welcome back, Buck!”

He laughed, returning the hug, picking her up, swinging her around as they both laughed. Once her feet were back on the ground, she slapped his arm with a grin. “All that worrying for nothing, Addie.”

“I have plenty to worry about, Buck, as did your best friend here.” She said, pointing to Bucky, who watched the two of them with a fond smile on his face. Bucky nodded agreeing with his girl.

Buck looked between the two of them with a smirk. “It’s good to have feet on the ground.”

Addie finally relaxed, the last of the tension leaving her shoulders. Her boys were back, safe and sound. “Now what?”

“Lunch, nap, then club later.” Buck announced, already knowing what the rest of the day entailed.

Bucky look between Buck and Addie. “Addie, can you join us for lunch?”

“Lead the way gents.” She laced her hands with Bucky, giving Buck a look. “If you need to talk, you know where to find me.”

“Appreciate it, Addie.” He nodded, starting to walk to the mess hut.

Happily, she squeezed Bucky’s hand. She didn’t care what happened the rest of the day, in that moment she was content and everything was alright for the moment.

6300 words later we’ve reached the end of chapter 4. What did you think? Feedback is always appreciated!!

Chapter 5

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

Chapter 7: A Growing Blaze (Wildfires to Rain Storms)

This is a short chapter, my life has been so busy lately, sorry!

When Vex wakes up, her head is killing her. The back of her head aches, forcing her to squint against the growing sunlight over the horizon. She yawns and rubs the sleep from her eyes. 

Beside her, Percy is still sleeping, his glasses are removed and his hair is askew. His face is tilted towards her, mouth slightly open. Her eyes are drawn to his lips, how soft they are, how peaceful he looks in his sleep. She can’t help but think about what he told her last night. He’s suffered through so much pain and has been so afraid for so long. 

And yet, he feels comfortable sleeping beside her.

She remembers sitting in the yard of her mother’s house, watching squirrels jump between the trees. As a child, she didn’t understand why they wouldn’t come close to her. Elania just smiled and told her that she has to prove herself trustworthy before they’ll approach.

And if they really trust you, if they know beyond a doubt that you’re not a threat, they’ll let themselves sleep near you.

Vex learned a long time ago that people aren’t so different from wild animals, not nearly as much as they think they are.

As she shifts to sit up, Percy squints his eyes open, “Vex?” Gods she loves how his voice is deeper in the morning, how the words seem to come out without inhibition, missing all of his usually proper tone.

She smiles, “Good morning, darling. How did you sleep?”

Percy sits up as well, dragging a hand down his face before fumbling for his glasses and slipping them on, “Very well actually.” Not wanting any more relaxation, he pushes back the blankets covering him and stands up. As he stretches his hands over his head, Vex can’t take her eyes off of the strip of skin it reveals on his back. Gods, what has gotten into her. “Hold on a moment,” Percy tells her, “I’ll make you breakfast.”

“Percy, you don’t-” Vex cuts herself off as she looks out the window. “Fuck…” 

The sky, that had just yesterday been only partially covered in smoke, is now a deep, deep orange. It looks as though the sky itself is on fire. Everything is covered in a haze, the trees nothing but outlines. 

“What?” Percy asks, turning to her with a frown. 

“The fire,” Vex rises up onto her knees on the bed, moving her injured foot gingerly. “It grew, fuck, the winds must have shifted over night.” Without warning, she grabs Percy’s arm and uses him as a brace to stand up. Immediately, he puts a hand on her lower back to brace her. Butterflies take flight in her stomach, settling around her heart, flapping their wings in time with the beating of her heart.

She tries to shoo them away as best she can, this is not the time.

With Percy’s help, she makes her way to the long range radio. “This is Vex in the North Tower, forest services, come in. Over.”

“We hear you, North Tower, go ahead. Over.” It’s not Keyleth who responds, but Vex recognizes the voice, one of the other forest service employees.

“The winds shifted overnight, the wildfire has spread North, I’m not sure how far. Over.”

“Understood, we are aware of the shift. We are unable to get eyes on the fire but we have no reason to believe that we need to upgrade the category of the fire. Over.”

As Vex talks back and forth with forest services, she hears Percy moving about behind her. But she stays focused on the radio, making sure to remember everything that he tells her. She’s never experienced a fire this big out here, the protocols are important.

“What about evacuations?” Vex asks. 

“As of now there isn’t a need for it, we’ll keep all of the lookouts updated. Vex, radio when you get back to East Tower, give us an update on the fire if you can. Over.”

“Will do, over and out.”

As she leans back in the chair, Percy slides a bowl in front of her. It’s full of oatmeal with a light dusting of cinnamon on top. A light blush covers Percy’s cheeks, “I hope this is alright.”

Vex smiles as she mixes it together, “Thank you, darling, this is wonderful."

Finish reading on ao3

[nochi-quinn]

legend of vox machina season 2 episode 8: echo tree OR more like incel tree amirite

sam is the "nice melons" npc bc of course he is

imagine the twins using their old tricks to duck the guards and it doesn't work bc that was over a decade ago

hello Elf Guard Matt

"we're his children" (derogatory)

"I've known many people with money and titles. They are definitely not worth you."

VELORA

the twins are not immune to velora and neither am I

"your father will be pleased to see you" I doubt that

"if you'd notified me you'd be gracing us with your presence" has this man never heard of an emergency

"if you've come for my money - or my goats - I don't have any!" wilhand

"real vestments!" I don't know why that's so adorable to me but here we are

"did you forget to eat??" eating is one of the three things grog actually knows how to do

"hi, pop-pop. I fucked up" me every time I call my parents

"what can syngorn do for you?" directed very specifically at percy, fuck everybody else

oh I just realized he's probably shitty about keyleth too, since she's also a half-elf

a second-generation half-elf, at that

my partner: does he not realize vax is wearing deathwalker's ward me: he doesn't care, that's human shit

"do you have any idea the burden your sudden arrival has caused my family?" I regret to inform you that this is in fact also your family

and now we know what role vex played in this emotional abuse hellpit

"you might just wanna avert your eyes" she literally confirmed that grog's dick didn't get acided off for him

if that's how scanlan 'works both ends' I am terribly sorry for any of his partners

it took me three watches to realize he's whistling Pull My Beads Of Love

percy spending that whole meeting trying desperately to figure out which House he could give to Vex without Cass shanking him

"what does 'fuck you' mean?" little pitchers have big ears

(didn't they on-purpose teach her the word 'shit' in the campaign)

if we get byroden flashbacks are they gonna be exu-compliant

"somehow I feel like it hurt me more" relationships! with! abusive! parents! are! complicated!

ew, tree gunk

he finally called her stubby, I can die happy

I knew where they were going as soon as he said "stimulation"

big "not a good enough reason to use the word 'penetrate'" energy

I enjoy Transition Frog

garmelie: don't submit to his voice vex, already extremely emotionally compromised: ✔✔

look, I don't claim to be a perfect parent, but I don't think I could look at something a child made for me with their own two tiny little hands and just casually break it in front of them

not even just my child. any child.

yeah, come to think of it, even vax doesn't Get It, bc he never wanted syldor's approval, or at least got over the want very quickly.

(fun fact, every time I type or say "syldor" I have to force myself not to say "isildur"

look at this. this is insane. I'm obsessed with this shot.

the feywild is using all of percy's black powder, he better hope victor survived.

I'm glad we got the "if I could pull the blood of him from my veins" line but it was so, so good when she was yelling it at her dad

vax now is not the time to ask keyleth to touch your butt

"dear broken vex'ahlia" if the word 'broken' is literally in your proposal there might be something fucked up about it mb

vex: my heart is someone else's percy: oh? do I know them?

incel tree saundor

"how do you fight a tree?" with a druid

I reluctantly admit him making the arrows out of his palm is pretty cool

I also love a good upside-down arrow shot

vex Jungle Sliding for her life

god I love keyleth so much

the way it springs open inside the stab wound is A+

mala: of course it survived, bc percy 100% expected her to stab a man with it

"he is who he's always been" "I know. and so am I." I am foaming at the mouth over this, at vex knowing she needs to work on parts of herself before she can actually confront her dad

there is SO MUCH nuance and middle ground between "still being actively abused" and "full no-contact" but it's more viscerally satisfying to show the Salt The Earth Behind You fight instead of the long, slow, painful work of attempting reconciliation

tl;dr reconciliation is a thing and I wish more stories used it even though it's complicated and subjective

"I usually hate the theater"

"how did that appear? how did tvs just appear? and really old tvs, based on the make and the year?"

this motherfucker

"he killed me with them" grog backstory GROG BACKSTORY

westruun is my favorite arc okay, I apologize for nothing

[bluiex]

same anon with the mumscarian kidfic (glad you like it \(^ヮ^)/ )

There is so much angst yes but also so much fluff. Scars and Grian are just trying their absolute best to woo Mumbo and it’s only because he’s so caught up in his own head that he can’t see it.

I’m thinking about them inviting him over for dinner as a date best friends bonding time and they have a lovely evening but Mumbo doesn’t have a lot of stamina right now so after they have eaten he gets very tired.

Grian has a bird brain moment over it going full protective papa bird and insist Mumbo stay the night (get in the nest get in the nest mates in the nest where it’s warm and safe). Mumbo thinks Grian is taking him to a guest room right up until the moment he has been guided into what is clearly Grian and Scar’s own bedroom. He tries to insist that he really couldn’t take their bed from them but Grian is being very stubborn. It is also difficult to talk him out of it because he is completely fixated on the blankets lying just right while he guides Mumbo to lie down (nest has to be perfect perfect for scar perfect for mumbo perfect for babies this is how you seduce someone perfect nest).

“But Grian if I take yours and Scar’s bed where will you sleep?”

“The nest.” Grian replies because that is obvious to him as he settles in to make sure Mumbo and the babies are safe and sound.

(Scar realizes Grian is having his bird moment is watching to make sure Grian doesn’t get too caught up in it. He managed to get into bed before Grian so he can lie between him and Mumbo and be the target of Grian’s cuddles)

When they go to sleep one half of the bed is Mumbo who would definitely be nervous about all this if he were any less tired, and the other is Scar being affectionately cuddled by Grian.

In the morning Scar wakes first spooned between Mumbo and Grian, both himself and Grian with a hand on Mumbo’s belly. It seems that during the night Mumbo has moved closer in his sleep. He smiles and wiggles his way out, leaving the two of them cuddling each other. Even if it turns out Mumbo isn’t interested in him and Grian the three of them have always been very affectionate and it isn’t the first time they’ve cuddled like that. First time they have slept in the same bed for sure but this is not something he fears will make Mumbo uncomfortable.

Scar is dealing with some hybrid courtship instincts of his own though. His brain keeps telling him that a pregnant mate friend should be kept safe in the heart of the mansion megabase being pampered and showered in precious gifts. That would be out of line of course but food sharing is a big part of Vex culture too, so what he can do is go and make Mumbo and Grian both the best breakfast in bed they’ve ever dreamed of.

Mumbo wakes up in Grian’s arms while Grian chirps happily at him.

“Sorry I woke you.” Grian whispers. “One of my feathers is in your hair.”

“Oh is it?” Mumbo asks sleepily and reaches up to remove it.

(He is too busy looking at it to see how Grian’s face falls. Giving feathers to your mates is important to avians and he has to tell himself Mumbo wouldn’t know that, wouldn’t know he is rejecting Grian)

“All good.” Mumbo says and gives Grian the feather back just as Scar walks in with a tray of way more food than three people could ever eat.

“Breakfast in bed.” he announces.

(Grian recognizes what this is. Scar used to being him gifts of food in their early courtship too. He smiles and sticks the feather behind Scar’s ear)

“I couldn’t. I’ve already taken up your bed I can’t steal your food too.” Mumbo says in protest.

“None sense you’re our guest.” Scar tells him. “And I… we care about you Mumbo. A great deal. We want you to be well cared for.”

Mumbo smiles but neither Grian or Scar understand why his eyes look so sad.

*pets this gently* *kiss you on the cheek platonically* I love this so much. I'm- Mumbo- Please- They love you please- Gah Mumbo just silently coming to terms with this is just them being friendly, not because they love him, like Mumbo loves them.. my heart

[bangtan-sinnamons]

On Cloud Mine (M)

⤞ Paring: Alpha werewolf!Taehyung x Omega werewolf!reader

⤞ Summary: Your fuck buddy, Taehyung, heat was coming to an end and you decide to leave him to eat. But trouble awaits for you when you come home smelling like another alpha.

⤞ Genre: Fuck buddies to lovers, Werewolf Smut, Angst, Fluff

⤞Warning: Possessive acts, LOTS of misunderstanding, slightly toxic relationship, fingering, cum play, degradation, werewolf sex/heat, creampie, unprotected sex, Swear words, Taehyung dom, reader submissive, hickeys

⤞ Word count:  3586

（*/∇＼*）ᴴᵉʰᵉ

“Omega, don’t pull away...not yet,” Taehyung groans at the lost of your body’s warmth pressed up against him. “I’m still in my rut,” His hand grips tighter on your waist, hard enough to leave crescent nail marks.

“Well I want to eat....the food stash in your room is gone,” you clasp your hand over his, in attempt to yank his strong arms that were now firmly wrapped around your waist. “I‘ll be back soon,” you tried again, but this time with a softer tone.

Taehyung was nearing the end of his heat, so it shouldn’t be a problem leaving him alone for a bit. It’s not like you were his mate or anything. Just sex buddies, nothing more, just like how he wants.

But sometimes in moments like these, where he looks as if he had never experienced being alone before, it made you feel special. Almost as if he WAS your mate.

“Omega. Wait,” he commands.

You freeze, your inner she-wolf unconsciously warns you to obey him. You tried to search for what he wants behind the strands of hair blocking his eyes.

“If you are hungry. Come suck me off,” he abruptly says. A smirk forming, when he notice your doe eyes looking down at him. Looking at him like a deer in headlights. Alert, and cute.

You glared at him.

“Taehyung. I’m leaving your ass to go get some food,” you flicked his forehead. You hated when you were swayed into submission, yet he finds it hilarious.

You can’t believe you let your thoughts linger for more than a second about him being your mate. He was definitely in the stay away category, just another horny alpha, that you perhaps have feelings for.

He finally lets you go, rolling over to your side of the bed. “Fine, but don’t leave the house,”

You hummed in response. Heading to the pile of discarded clothes.

“Do you know where my bra went?” You asked as you shuffle around the room naked, your ass on full display for the horny man in the bed. If he stared hard enough, he could see the glistening cum that dared dripped onto your thigh. The sight brought encouragement, making him wish, he hastily slammed himself into you to keep the threatening cum from leaving you.

He wets his lips at the sight, but an offending sigh penetrates his ears. He looks at you, ears perking up in your direction. “What did you say?” He growls, not liking how you disrupted his thoughts.

“My bra. Where. Is. It,”

“Oh, it’s over here,” he sits up from the bed as he holds up your garment. A playful smile plastered on his face.

Ugh, what is he up to now. You rolled your eyes when he doesn’t throw it over to you, forcing you to come to him instead.

“I swear, you want me to starve to death,” you mumble, approaching him. You try to snag it away, but he holds it out of reach. “Give. Me. The damm thing,” you grunt.

He closed the remaining space between you. “Are you sure you wanna leave?” Taehyung whispers in your ear giving it a playful nip, “Just stay for a while longer,”

You had enough of this man and with a hard push, the both of you topple onto the bed with a plop. Giving you easier access to snatch your garment as fast as you can.

His eyes follows your remaining steps as you grumpily exited the room. With the final click of the door shutting, he buries his nose into your silky pillow. Snuggling against it, trying to get a whiff of your alluring scent from before. Once your aroma was mixed with his, he was influenced into a lustful frenzy.

He buckles into the bed imagining you on top of him, just like moments ago. Your appearance, your everything makes him go crazy. Your hair was slightly damp as if you came out of the shower, but he knows that it was really from your last heated session with him. And the fact that you were so aggressive, he loved it. He loved it more than he should have, cause he was the alpha not you.

“For fucks sake,” he groans, watching his once limp dick raging red again.

He looks at the door and was very tempted to go find you. He is sure you wouldn’t mind if he was fucking you as you eat. Actually, he finds that kinda hot. He looks pleased at himself for the great idea and he heads to the door.

—————-

On the other hand, you were face to face with an empty fridge, empty cabinets, literally empty everything. You sighed as you closed the last cabinet shut. Did he expect you to eat the crumbs? Even a mouse would be hungry living here.

For whatever reason, your heart and your growling stomach decided to leave the house without telling him. Too tired to hear the man nag at you, you head to the nearest convenient store.

The park you’re currently walking by serves as a great change of scenery and soon enough, you began to feel like yourself again. Your cheeks stuffed with food, and your demon stomach finally no longer growled. The calming night breeze drags your hair along and carries your mind along with it because you no longer kept track of the time.

You were just about to sit on a nearby bench before a pair of hands rested on your shoulder. With a flinch and a twist of your neck in search of the intruder of your so called personal bubble, you were pleasantly relieved to see it was just Hoseok.

“HOSEOK! YOU LITTLE...” One hand covered your stuffed mouth from spewing your food at him and the other hand smacking his shoulder. You swallow the remaining food left in your mouth before continuing to yell at him. “Don’t scare me like that!”

“My bad. My bad. Stop hitting me,” he laughs, his big fluffy ears twitching. “How come you’re here so late? Do you want me to take you home?”

“Oh, shit...” you cursed out loud. Taehyung! How could you forget about him. “Hoseok DON’T come near me anymore,” you backed away. Taehyung is overly sensitive with other people’s scent, especially during his ruts.

Last time during his rut, the scent of your older brother threw him off so badly, he made you shower until you were back to smelling like peaches and cream. And not only one shower, but three showers, despite being so uncontrollably horny. He was literally dripping in sweat, slipping swear words from his lips, and holding back every urge to fuck you senseless just because you smelled QOUTE on QOUTE Nasty.

Hoseok’s ears lay flat against the crown of his head at your abrupt action. “Sorry. Was I being too straightforward?” He questions.

Seeing those gravity drawn shoulder from the upbeat wolf, was a difficult sight to see. Almost as if you were betraying your friendship with a mere fuck buddy.

“No! No. It’s just that I’m helping Taehyung’s rut and I don’t want to trigger him with your scent!” You explained.

His eyes widen at the mention of Taehyung. Hoseok, also being a close friend of Taehyung, has witnessed his possessiveness of you. The wolf was always triggered when another scent was on you, even if it wasn’t during his rut. The growls, the glares, he sent, Hoseok was honestly surprised how you didn’t seem to notice the signs. The man was in love with you. Infatuated with your every being and simply using this fuck buddy thing as an excuse to get closer with you.

“Y/n, you should head back and take a quick shower too. Text me later, okay?” He suggested, the worry was evident on his face. And with a wave of your hand, you hurriedly jogged towards Taehyung’s apartment.

You fumbled with the spare key that Taehyung had lended you. Not out of nervousness, but from the sweat in your palms that you wiped off from jogging so fast.

You can’t believe you were out for about an hour. Either Taehyung was going to be fuming or sleeping, and you hope it’s the later option.

Okay. You breathed. Just go in and shower. Everything should be fine.

You creaked the door open, just small enough for you to peak inside, but instead you made straight eye contact with Taehyung’s glare.

Fine you were not.

You bit your lips, as you parted the door wider. The air filled with pheromones that screamed dominance and you can’t help, but stand still, waiting for his next command. While your eyes wandered about, avoiding his piercing looks. You closed the door, figuring out the words you should careful say to the wolf before you.

Taehyung leans back in his spot on the sofa. You can hear him crack his knuckles. A habit you noticed when he tries to calm himself down, but this time each crack felt vexing.

“Did you have a good time?" He probed bitterly, his lips pursed. Your sudden scent change only confirms his inner thoughts.

“What?”

How dare you act confused, when it was obvious of how guilty you looked. You can’t even look him in the eye for goodness sake. “Omega. Don’t make me repeat. I said, did you have a good time?”

“Look,” you rushed out. “I don’t know what you are trying to get at, but I went to eat and I met Hoseok on the way,” you admitted, not wanting to lie to the already raging wolf. “Nothing biggie. So let me shower real quick,”

You tried to dismiss yourself, but the words that flowed from your lips angered him even more. Without a moment of hesitation, a sickening smack rattled through the apartment. Of course he didn’t hit you, he could never hit you, but he did strike his hand on the sofa arm. The sound loud enough for you to stop in your tracks.

”Shower my ass,” he scoffed. “Omega did you really think you can fool me. You leave me ALONE during my rut to go fuck another ALPHA!”

“I-“

“Is Hoseok your mate or something? Why else would you have the need to leave me. You could have told me you were busy or some shit,” He interrupts, not wanting to hear your lame excuses. “Then I would have asked for another Omega!” He yells, currently blinded with rage.

Although most of his accusations were very off the charts, wrong. He was right about one thing. He could alway get another Omega that was better suited and that fact hurt you. You lowered your eyes to the floor again.

Your unresponsive reaction only makes him fume. Was what he was saying true?!No. It can’t be. He hasn’t even confessed yet. Every being of him is saying that you were his mate. How could it be.

He struts towards you. Instinctively your eyes shot up to meet his. Seeing his hand raised up, made you flinch. Instead of what you thought would be the worse pain inflicted on you, it was just a caress of your hair.

He raised a brow when he came into contact with the unexpected sweat he felt from your hair. He sniffs his hand and emits a low menacing growl. Almost as if he was warning you for what was about to come. “Look at you! You are fucking wet. Is your cunt filled with his cum too? Are you just as wet down here?” He pressed his hand on your clothed pussy, trying to feel your lies out, and you let out a soft whimper.

Despite Taehyung believing he had some claim over you, he was painfully reminded that he didn't. He was probably a nobody compared to Hoseok. You never spared a glance at him, so why would you now. That’s why he decided to claim you, the only way he knew how to.

He roughly manhandles your shirt to the side and hurriedly press his lips onto your collarbone. Almost desperately to feel your warmth mingled with his once more. You render speechless as you feel his teeth brush over your collarbone. His other hand is on your back, pulling you closer to him. And he laps at your neck until he felt satisfied at how it glistened in the dimly lit room before he sucks on your soft skin. He does that for a few seconds before his lips reached your shoulder.

He gagged at the smell. It reeked of a scent that wasn’t him or you. It was like someone had stolen his territory, and now he had to claim it back. You gasp at the sudden bite he left on you shoulder.

“TAEHYUNG!” You yelped when he doesn’t just stop there. He continues to leave more bites along your shoulder and neck until you could feel each spot pulsing.

“Now you speak?” He mumbles between each bite and peck he leaves on you. If he can’t have your heart he will at least have your body marked for others to see. And if he was lucky enough, they would think you were already taken. He smiles at the thought.

“Tae-“ you groaned. “I didn’t do anything... I swear!” He had asked you to be exclusive fuck buddies, so maybe that’s why he is so upset with the thought of someone else having you.

He stops biting you to take a good look at your expression. “Omega. Why do you need to take a shower then?” His face was now only inches away. “What are you hiding in that pussy of yours?” He seethes.

“Please...” you uttered, feeling his breath warm your skin. You honestly don’t know what you were begging for. Were you trying to get him to believe you or were you getting horny with how possessive he looked. Not to miss the fact that he was all so attractive already.

“Fuck it,” he snarls, growing highly impatient. If you couldn’t answer him properly, he was going to check it himself.

He gets hold of your body and carries you back to his room. Throwing you on top of the bed. Taehyung wastes no time as he aggressively pulls you forward to the edge of the bed, spreading your legs open as wide as they can go. “Shit you’re wet.”

He pulls the offending skirt and panties away from you. With his fingers, he spread your pussy lips open, showing yourself all to him. Pulsing and soaked. The smell hitting him straight in the face.

You press your elbows against the bed to leverage yourself up. “Alpha. I didn’t do it with Hoseok,”

“Explain why you are so fucking wet then! You slut!” He pinches your nub and you wither below him once more.

“You!” Your words barely audible as you cried from pleasure. “Taehyung you are the only one that can make me wet like this!”

With a glance he knows no one had fucked you yet, but your words felt so reassuring to hear. He smirks and continues on, but this time with confidence. Taehyung had erase all niggling doubts in his mind about Hoseok and your relationship.

You practically purr when Taehyung runs his index finger down your wet slit, feeling how wet you were because of him before he sinks it into your pussy. He takes his time, letting you feel him run his finger against your walls as you twitch trying to suck his fingers in. He caves in when he see your hungry pussy asking for it. He slowly pumps it in and out of you.

“Yes!” You mewled under his touch . You harshly bit your lip as you felt him slip another finger into you. “Don’t stop!”

Immediately you feel him withdraw his fingers. His hand slick with your wetness as he hovers it in front of your face. You could taste it on your lips from simply smelling it. And you couldn't help but open your mouth obediently, expecting him to shove his fingers in.

“Aren’t you greedy?” He taps your nose, smearing your juices. Your confused face makes him chuckle as he places his lips on your nose kissing and licking it up.

Your checks flamed “I-I...”

“This,” he holds up the finger that was still wet with your juices. “Is mine. You can get what’s yours in a bit. Be patient,” he placed his finger on his lower lip, swiping the pad of his finger onto his tongue before closing his mouth to suck on your juices.

You let out a groan watching the erotic sight right before your eyes.

His hand slowly draws away from his mouth, a string of saliva still coating his index finger. He sighed softly, the bulge in his pants visibly twitching as it slowly grew more needy. He had truly tasted heaven.

You were so eager for his cock. That you begin to slip your hand to your clit, hoping to get some relief and of course Taehyung caught you seconds before you reached your burning core. “Taehyung put it in already,” you begged. “Please,”

Fuck, he had no patience left to think, and instead decided to spur into action especially when he wanted to tease you a bit more. He placed his hands at the back of your knees to push your legs up, his ears peeking up, focusing on how pathetic you sound at your new angle.

’My precious little cunt, made to take my cock,’’ He beams, tugging his boxer down to position himself in his favorite little hole. His cock stayed still, with the occasional rubbing against you. The cock that you know so well, somehow still made you breathless.

You squirmed around him for more friction. “Alpha. I beg. I beg,” you whimper when he doesn’t immediately fills you up with his girth.

He bares his teeth and grips onto your hips. You were ready and he knows it.

In a second, he was half way in, and the next, he had buried himself inside of you to the hilt. It was a swift snap of his hips, that ended with you howling, but becomes muffles when he placed his lips over yours.

He continues to buckle into you. Feeling you stretch out and tighten at the same time. “Ughh you’re so hot,” he groans. “Your pussy was made for me, just for me,”

The rigor force and accuracy of his cock pushing into you and abusing your sweet spot while he begins to slip a hand under your shirt, sent you delirious. You grip the bedsheets tighter with every motion and touch. “More! Taehyung more,”

The way your breast bounced with every thrust made him lifts your shirt up to get a better view of your perky red nubs, before attaching his lips. God, he really loved how you tastes. How hot your skin becomes at the simple touch, and how you made him into the horny mess he is now.

You moaned, desperately wanting to feel him even more. He was so damm perfect. The way he was fucking and biting you, made you only love him more. You try to wrap your legs around his torso, no longer caring that you were so in love with your fuck buddy. That your inner she wolf was begging you to get marked by this man.

“Shit, I need to hear you make that sound again,” Taehyung growls in your ear, thrusting in you even harder. One of his hand going back to tug at your nub.

His dick runs at his own pace, a pace that you loved, yet you couldn’t catch up with and you curse, moaning his name as he continues to push in and out of you. Your vision is taken, when you feel the knot in your stomach.

“Tae-ah, so close. Cum with me,”

“Gonna come on my cock, hmm?” He pistons into you.

“Yes...” you whimper, wrapping your arm around his neck.

His words are a jumbled mess as you clench down around him, feeling your own orgasm reach its highest point.

You jut your hips as you come undone around him. Your legs losing your grip around his waist. And he slams harder into you, causing him to plunge deeper inside your already sensitive pussy. That does it for Taehyung.

He lets out a cry before he lets his cum shoot thick ropes into you. “Fuck. I love you, Y/n, my mate,” You freeze at hearing such word. You never heard such intimate words comming from him. Never. Ever.

Your heart hammered in your chest at Taehyung's sudden confession. A weight was suddenly lifted off your shoulders. "You , you love m-me?" You croaked out.

“More than anything,” he groans. Nestling his cock inside you. Making sure he doesn’t let any of your mixed juices out of your core. Making sure you are bred well. Making sure you won’t ever run away again.

“I love you too,” you say at the heat of the moment and his cock still buried deep within you. Wait. Isn’t this too weird? “This is some heat talk, isn’t it?” You questioned even though you really hope he denied it, and you sighed in relief when he did.

“No! I really love you!” You let out a giggle at his sudden seriousness.

“Don’t give me false hope. If you don’t really like me then say it now” he whines.

“I love you too. So stay”

[utilitycaster]

Hello I would love to hear you thoughts on Caduceus and his arc. Clay is the only character who’s story has made me cry genuine tears (when he got his fam back) and I feel like his nuances and the changes he goes through tend to be overlooked a lot, exactly because of how quietly they happen.

Of course!

So as Taliesin said a few times and as I've pointed out, Caduceus (and Molly for that matter) was intended to be a static character. Obviously this is an impossibility in D&D because things happen and you cannot control it and moreover I am sure Taliesin is aware of this, so it's more that the intent was to have a character who did not feel they needed to change, possibly in contrast with Percy, who absolutely felt he needed to change. A self-proclaimed static character still needs a reason to be static: Molly's philosophy was, as notably stated on talks, "Life's short...do something to a bagel" and more generally the lack of need for change came from this sort of aimless and benevolent-when-convenient hedonism. Caduceus, on the other hand, is secure in his purpose. He has known who he was supposed to be for his whole life, and he embraces it, and sees no reason to change, until he absolutely has to, and even then he is deeply reluctant.

Caduceus is about what happens when your comfort zone and guiding principles themselves fold in on each other and are like "hey. expand us or else."

I think a lot of people have rightfully noted that from his appearance through the Xhorhas arc, Caduceus sees the rest of the Nein as mourners, and that's within his comfort zone. Sure, there are some moral quandaries at the docks of Nicodranas, but he's able to get through that (in part because he's in the Mighty Nein but isn't personally stealing the ship, in part because of Jester's talk with him). I think it's also worth noting that while Caduceus is extremely insightful he is not superhuman (super firbolgian?) in that regard; it is the insight borne of being someone who is there for mourners and so he has a good eye for emotions, less so for motivations, and a lot of the Nein's motivations early on escape him.

The first wave of big changes happen in Bazzoxan and the immediate aftermath. First, Fjord confides in him and asks for advice - and Caduceus is used to giving advice but I'm not sure he's ever had to offer religious practice advice, as the people he would have interacted with would have either been the sketchy people of Shady Creek Run, or else people already faithful enough to seek the Blooming Grove. And second, the party finds itself directionless for a time; there is no pressing business or better ideas and he cannot hide his own mission behind someone else's, so he voices his recommendation that they come clean to the Bright Queen, and then they go to the kiln.

Caduceus's relationship with Fjord I think is useful to bring up in a sense of contrast, in that Caduceus is incredibly good at helping Fjord through a crisis, because Caduceus is trained for crisis - but it gets much hazier once Fjord is out of said crisis and as it turns out has a very different relationship with the Wildmother, and I think this comes up to an extent when they talk in Rexxentrum. I think Caduceus, for all his talk of nature's violence, struggles with the concept of nature being malevolent or having goals - it just is. Whereas Fjord is much more comfortable with the idea of nature perhaps being a force that is itself a threat, or deceptive, and more generally with the idea of nature as somewhat unknowable and full of mysteries. I don't think Caduceus's personal view of nature ever changes, but I think his ability to process that he doesn't have the answers even in the areas within his comfort zone improves, and this is something of an inflection point with regards to him acknowledging new perspectives on his own comfort zone.

It's also a little before this that we see Caduceus reveal vulnerability for the first real time since his panic attack on the boat right after they stole it, when he confides in The Gentleman. Some of this is a calculated social move, to be fair, but it's a notable step forward.

That said it takes a while to change and he spends a few days post-Rexxentrum doing anything to avoid facing his own mission. It's worth noting that Caduceus is a cleric of the same level as Jester, and could have cast sending before the party ever met up with him, and he never did. So they go to Beau's father and Isharnai first, putting it off as long as he can.

Caduceus's scenes with his family sort of snap all of the above into place, in that his parents are glad he's spent some time in the world and are completely accepting of his desire to keep going for a time. I'm honestly not sure, myself, why he does this because I don't think it's metagaming (ie, it's not Taliesin going 'I can't make a third character') but I think there are multiple valid interpretations. Caduceus's role, as the one who stays at home, is ultimately a self-imposed one.

He sort of mulls on that for the next while, sort of uncomfortably internalizing differing perspectives on deities with the Artagan reveal/Rumblecusp and additionally processing his own deeper relationship with the Wildmother, with multiple visions, and maybe even the fact that nature constantly wants to murder him.

Then we get to Eiselcross and that's when it all hits. I think as soon as he sees the corrupted trees he gets a sense of the scale, that this corruption is not just unnatural but it is ancient and has been a threat for a long time and that staving it off at the Blooming Grove is not getting at the unknown, underlying source (which he probably knew deep down, but as discussed above he does not really love to admit those things to himself). And he realizes that he might need to be the one not just to commit but to initiate violence, as the person with no emotional ties to Lucien via Molly; he finds himself bending his own moral rules for the greater good more; and I think this is when he realizes either that he needs to change, or perhaps that he's been changing quietly and slowly the whole time and has just been terrified to admit it.

The last night at the Blooming Grove before the final push into Aeor is another good look at Caduceus, who, like a number of characters in this campaign, is so very much defined by his ongoing and important familial relationships. We get a brief but heartbreaking glimpse at the state he was in prior to the Nein showing up in the garden, and how he was trying to induce something, anything, to give him direction because he didn't trust himself to leave without that assurance; and his admission, finally, to someone else of that change, that he never wanted to be the person to go on an adventure, that he still has very mixed feelings about it, but that this is his responsibility. And it's that which allows him to confidently say, on Cognouza, that it's time to end this shit.

In short (Clue the Movie voice: too late) Caduceus's arc is someone who has always believed in his sacred, literally god-given responsibility into which he was born, and struggles against the fact that said sacred responsibility ends up being quite different than what he expected but ultimately is able to accept it, and his reward is that he can return to the responsibility he initially embraced, having grown in ways he could not have otherwise.

Now, I think part of why Caduceus's arc gets overlooked is twofold. The first reason is that background arcs are, well, background, and it's quiet and subtle and highly internal and hard to turn into big dramatic moments, which, as a person whose favorite C1 character is Vex, I understand, but also those arcs are the best.

The second, and this is going to sound even more "I appreciate the muppets on a much deeper level than you" than the first, is that I feel a lot of people who considered Caduceus their favorite character did lean into the myth of "superfirbolgian" insight when the fact always was that Caduceus had no interest in the political; did not make Trent quake in his wizard robes in the slightest as was confirmed in the finale; and ultimately wanted most of all to return to his home.

It's a very true and very unique choice and if I may [note: I am writing this so I do what I want] I think a lot of people did not understand Caduceus in that they felt his ending was unhappy for him, and some of this is that people had really stupid takes on the party splitting at the end. I have mixed feelings on the true universality of the Campbellian Monomyth and even more mixed feelings on everyone giving Dan Harmon tons of credit for merely rephrasing it but despite that, Caduceus's arc fits it perfectly (and very literally): comfort zone -> need arises -> unfamiliar situation -> adaptation -> gets what he wants -> at a price -> returns to comfort -> having changed.

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Prey for You | Part 5

Genre: Smut, angst.

Word Count: 5.8k

Summary: After finding out what Chan really thinks of you, you’re determined to never let him in again. But he finds a way to sneak back into your bed. 

Warnings: super unhealthy relationship, dom!reader, sub!chan, milking but not the prostate way, use of a fleshlight, cumplay?, degradation, enemies to lovers,  wolf!hybrid chan, fox!hybrid reader

A/N: this is a major risk cuz i don’t even know if I’m done editing this lol so if its a mess let me know and I might fix it lmao. the gif is for the bath scene btw uwu

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 Part 5, Part 6

You wish you could immediately move out and go someplace else, away from Chan and the constant reminder that you’re not good enough for him. But if it was that easy, you wouldn’t have had to move in with him in the first place. Now you were forced to live with the man who everyday reminded you of what you could’ve had if only you weren’t what you were.

For his part, Chan tries to apologize to you, but what use is his apology now that you have confirmation of what he really thinks of you? That doesn’t mean he has let up, though.

“Hey, baby.” The man in question greets you as soon as you come back from a lecture. “I wanna talk to you.”

You can’t keep going through this. Every time he tries to justify himself--to explain why it’s a good idea that people don’t know about you-- it just cements in your mind that he’ll never see you as someone worthy of him, of anyone. So you silently move past him, walking towards your room and hoping that the severe look you have on your face will discourage him this time. But it doesn’t, and he follows you into your room.

“I have something to tell you.” He announces and you turn to face him with an agitated sigh. “Then say it and go.”

You hope this will be quick, at least, but your hope is dashed when he crosses the distance between you and wraps his arms around you, pulling you towards his body. You open your mouth to curse him out, but the smell of him floods your nose with a spicier tinge to it than usual.  

“Oh.” Your mouth gapes in realization. “You’re going into heat.”

He nods, leaning down to nuzzle your nose with his before going further, trying to catch your lips in a kiss, but his lips barely brush yours before you lean back, your hands pushing your body as far away from his as the embrace can allow. “So? That doesn’t change anything.”

“The hell it does.” He grimaces, not pleased with your reaction. “I need you.” 

“No, you need to get laid. You could get that from any of your groupies.” 

He scoffs in disbelief, “So you want me to go fuck other women?” 

You realize how far you’ve let things go when just hearing him say it out loud makes you want to fold in on yourself to protect your heart from getting torn to pieces. You shouldn’t have let things get this far. There is a reason you were so cautious before and you’ve gone and fucked yourself over at the first sign of someone being nice to you, of someone showing you the slightest hint of trust and affection. And you thought you were strong.

“I don’t care what you do.” You lie through your teeth, wishing to at least keep the knowledge of your shameful demise from him. “We’re not together.”

That angers him the most. “Yes, we are!” 

“Really? Because no one else seems to know.” You seethe, and he finally pulls away from you, infuriated at you as if you’re the one being ridiculous. “You’ve seen how my friends reacted. How do you think everyone else is gonna react?”

“That shouldn’t matter!”

“You’re just saying that because you don’t have anything to lose.”

“Oh my god, I can’t believe how full of yourself you are! You think I would be so damn honored if people knew I am with the pride of predators that you are?”

“Stop fucking saying that! Do I need to be a mindless brute to earn your respect as a predator?”

“No, but this--” You gesture vaguely towards him with distaste, “certainly isn’t earning my respect.” 

He takes a deep breath, face red and aggression rolling off of him in waves. You wonder if he’ll attack you like last time. But he just grits through his teeth, looking away, “What am supposed to do with my heat?”

“I don’t care.” You mutter, and his eyes snap to you, a little wild with fury. 

You hold your breath as he starts walking towards you, a muscle ticking in his jaw, and you imagine what it would be like if he were to snap it around your neck. Would it hurt more or less than you’re hurting right now? But instead of tearing your throat out, he walks past you and out of the room.

_____________________________

Chan has been gone for an hour now. And your mind was running wild with images of him fucking someone else. You feel stupid. You’re the one who sent him away, but what were you supposed to do? Give yourself completely to him until he has exhausted his need of you and throws you away? He’s made his stance pretty clear, and you’d be pathetic to let him use you like that. 

You're busy beating yourself when you hear the front door open, and you almost jump out of your skin. You whip around towards it, your treacherous affection hoping to see that Chan has changed his mind and came back to you, but instead your all too familiar bitterness takes hold of you as you see him stumbling into the apartment with a girl, their lips locked and their hands all over each other. 

You suppose there must be some truth to the phrase “if looks could kill” because the girl--a bunny hybrid--pulls away from Chan and her big eyes flit around the living room anxiously until they land on you. She squeaks when your eyes meek and she fearfully latches onto Chan’s arm. “You d-didn’t tell me you had a-a roommate.” 

Chan on the other hand is straight up grinning as he sees the murderous look on your face. He bends down to whisper something in the girl's ear that you can’t hear, but judging by the motion of his head and the direction she looks, you know he’s telling her where his bedroom is and to go wait for him there. She gives you one last nervous look before she scurries down the hall and disappears. When she’s gone, he struts over to you like a peacock showing off his feathers. 

“You look upset, baby girl.” 

“You’re a fucking bastard.” You spit out. He smiles wider and leans over you, pushing his hands against the back of the couch and caging you between them. "Last chance, fox. You gonna be a good girl for me or would you rather I go in there and fuck that pretty thing? I know she’ll be more than happy to do anything to please me."

You push him away roughly. He staggers for a second but quickly holds himself upright, grabbing your hands in a painful grip. “That wasn’t so nice, fox.” He grunts, pulling one of your hands towards his crotch and making you feel how hard he is. “But I’ll give you one more chance.” 

“You’re such a fucking slut.” You scowl, roughly palming his dick through his pants. He seems to love it though, biting his lip as a groan slips out of him. Vexed, you pull your hand back and get up, leaning up to hiss at him, "Get her the fuck out and come to my room."

His triumphant smile is met with a disgusted sneer from you. "You think you've won?"

“Kinda, yeah.” He laughs cockily. 

“Yeah, we’ll see about that.” 

_______________________

He quickly loses his smile when he steps into your room and sees the items you have on the bed--a fleshlight and a bottle of lube. He gives you a disheartened look. “No, no, this isn’t what we agreed on.”

“We didn’t agree on anything.” 

"I'm going into heat. I need to fuck you not some toy!"

“You can leave if you want. See if the little bunny isn’t too hurt to let you fuck her.” You challenge, confident that he will take anything you give him at this point.  

Groaning in defeat, he slumps down on the bed, and you smile knowingly, ordering him to undress for you. He obliges, although not without a sour pout. When he's naked, you gesture for him to come sit with you on the bed, back pressed against your chest as he settles between your legs. 

He is hard despite his protests, and you open the bottle of lube and squirt some of it on his cock, putting it down then wrapping your hand around him and pumping his cock slowly, just spreading the lube all over it. 

Grabbing the fleshlight with your other hand, you bring it to his lips. "Use your mouth, puppy." 

He groans, reluctantly peeking his tongue out to lap at the toy. You tsk in disapproval. “You’ll never get it wet this way. You’re really big, puppy.” You drawl, dragging your fist tightly up his long member and extracting a deep groan out of him. “Wouldn’t want your cock to get hurt when I fuck you with it dry now, would you?” 

He gives you a dissatisfied grunt but he pushes his tongue out more, starting to lick the opening of the fleshlight more deliberately now. “Good boy. Get it all wet so I can use it to milk every last drop of cum from your balls. Maybe then you’ll behave.” 

His hips buck up into your hands and he starts pushing his tongue in and out of the toy, the wet sounds of his tongue working the fleshlight filling up the room. 

"You're so pathetic. Eating out this silicone pussy so I can fuck you with it instead of sticking your dick in some bitch's warm pussy. All because I want you to, right?" You whisper in his ear before pressing soft kisses down his neck. His breath hitches and he pushes his hips up into your hands again, needing more than the gentle touches you were giving him. 

"You'll do anything if I ask you to." You state, pulling the toy away from his mouth, breaking off the tiny translucent strings of saliva that connect them. Letting go of his dick, you grab the lube again and order him to put two fingers out for you. You squeeze some of the lube onto them then bring the fleshlight to his hand. “Finger your pussy open, baby.” 

“You’re driving me crazy.” He groans as pushes his fingers into the toy, and you laugh. “Aw, is this frustrating for you, puppy?” 

“Yes.” He hisses, his fingers fucking in and out of the toy aggressively. 

“Good.” 

When you’re satisfied with how slick the toy has gotten, and how needy he’s become, you order him to stop and line it over his cock. “Ready, puppy?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be for a fucking toy.” He swears and you smile, plunging the fleshlight over his cock. You don’t need his enthusiasm to do what you want as with a few jerks of the toy, he’s already melting back onto you and moaning out his pleasure, his impending heat already working him to the edge of insanity. 

“See? You’re nothing but a horny dog trying to get off.” You use your free hand to massage his lower belly just above the base of his member, stoking the fire building there. “I should lock your dirty cock in a cage during this heat so you won’t go around humping and fucking whoever you can get your hands on. Only let you out when I want to use you.”

“Then use me, please. Take what you need from me.” He moans even louder, his back arching and his hips fucking up into the toy. “Sit on my face and make me eat you out until I can't breathe or sit on my cock and ride me until you've had your fill.” "And give you the satisfaction of giving me pleasure? No, you don't even deserve that. You'll just sit here and take everything like the selfish dog you are." You slide your hand up his body, brushing your fingers over his nipple. He instantly jerks and tries to close his legs but a harsh growl in his ear is all that's needed for him to swing his legs back open. 

“See? You’re already gonna cum, aren’t you?” You mock, reaching your hand out to grab the small glass cup you left at the bedside table and placing it under his cock.

“What are you doing?” Chan sputters, confused and embarrassed. 

“Wanna see how much cum you have for me, puppy. Show me how bad you need me.” You coax, taking the fleshlight off and using your hand instead, stroking his cock from bottom to top and pointing the leaking tip of it inside the cup. 

“Ahh---that’s filthy.” Chan protests but his eyes are glued to the scene and his moans get higher in pitch as you both prepare for him to orgasm. Your hands continue their rhythmic pumping as spurts of white cum start shooting into the glass, almost as if you’re manually squeezing them out of his dick. 

“That’s a lot of cum. Such a horny dog.” You murmur, taking in the amount of cum collecting in the glass, and he shudders, transfixed by the way your hand is milking every last drop from him. “And you’re wasting all of it. What a useless pup. Should’ve never been a wolf.” 

He growls and lays his head back on your shoulder to look up at you.You think he’s going to argue with you about what you just said but instead he stares at you with his puppy eyes and breathlessly asks for a kiss. 

You could refuse him, of course. He doesn’t deserve it. But you want it too, his plump, red lips too enticing to pass up, and so you close the distance between you and capture them in a lazy kiss. But you barely start before he’s squirming and whining against you. 

“I suppose you still have more to give me.” You murmur against his lips and start moving your hand over his dick again--the wet sounds from your lips against his and your hands over his dick soon filling up the room.

“Such a big boy.” You marvel as you pull away from his slick lips to gaze at his dick, his breath stuttering when you swipe your palm over the leaking head. “But you won’t even get to use it because you’re a dumb, selfish pup.” 

He blinks tiredly at you, apologetically, but you’ll have none of it. 

“Ready to fuck your toy again?” You ask haughtily, and he sighs, nodding defeatedly. 

“There you go.” You put the toy back on him. 

You’re surprised by how vocal he’s being. He’s the loudest you’ve ever heard him. You guess the heat was getting to him as he doesn’t even try to hold back, his moans lusty and shameless. He’s so consumed by the pleasure taking over his body like he’d die without it, and honestly it’s affecting you more than you’d like to admit, your panties sticking to your heat uncomfortably.

"You sound like a whore getting fucked.” You scoff, pumping his dick faster with the fleshlight. "Are you that desperate?" 

“Hmm--yes! Please...fuck me--” He cries, easily giving in as his hips jolt up. “Need your hot---ahh--wet pussy around my cock. You can milk me all you want then. I’ll be all yours. My cum is all yours.” 

“But I don't need to do that when you’re already being such an easy slut for me.” You move your hand up to his chest again, rubbing and teasing his nipples.

"But you want me--" He gasps as you pinch his nipple in retaliation. "Fuck me, please. Need your pussy--oh god.”

“You don’t need it, dumb puppy. You’re cumming fine enough in this toy.” You put your lips to his neck, sucking on the sensitive spot under his ear then laving over it with your tongue. 

“But I want more.. And I know you want---ahhh, fuck--fuck!" He cries out, looking down in time to watch himself empty into the cup again. And like last time, you make sure to catch every last drop. 

“Hah--please.” He pants, leaning back to look up at you, his eyes focusing on your lips. “Kiss...” 

You sigh, kissing him. He doesn’t have to be instructed in this, his lips opening automatically and his tongue pushing needily into your mouth. As his panting moans pick up again, you pull away. 

“Please fuck me.” He draws the request out, pleading. 

“No.”

He whimpers at your definite tone and huffs. “Then let me see you at least.”

“See me?” You quirk an eyebrow at him and he nods earnestly. "Wanna see you."

You move out from behind him and settle between his open legs. “Here I am.” 

But his gaze isn’t on your face, it’s glued to your hard nipples poking through your tank top in arousal. 

“Ah, you wanna see my tits, puppy? Will that help you cum more for me?” You pull your tank top over your breasts, exposing them. He whines at once, struggling to stay in his spot, his tongue swiping over his lips hungrily. 

"What is it? Wanna put suck on them, puppy?" You tease, sitting up and leaning your chest over his face, your breasts just out of reach of his mouth. 

“Yes! Please, can I?” He begs, and just his breath brushing against your nipples is enough to have you rubbing your legs together. You don’t even want to imagine how fast you’d cum if he put his hands on you.

Tangling your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, you push his face into your chest. “Go ahead. You better make it worth my while.”

His mouth immediately latches onto one of your nipples, lathering it with saliva and sucking on it eagerly.

"Fuck, that's a good boy." You hiss, grabbing the fleshlight and pulling it over his cock, not wanting to get distracted. But the faster you work him, the more eagerly he kisses and sucks at your tits, his tongue hungrily licking all over your chest and his teeth insistently nibbling at the skin. 

It's so good the friction you’re getting from rubbing your legs together is enough to make your orgasm build up. You're both impressed and mortified that you can feel yourself getting close just from jerking him off and having him suck on your tits. But you can't dwell on it too much, too busy trying to get him and yourself off. 

You get what you want when he flicks your nipple with his tongue then wraps his lips around your entire areola and sucks harshly, ripping the orgasm from your body. Gasping loudly, your movement over his cock stops and your head drops down. But Chan quickly reaches out and grabs your jaw, pulling your head against his so he can see your face as you cum, the both of you wide-eyed and breathing heavily as the orgasm shakes your body. 

"Fuck." Chan grunt, his hips bucking up into the stationary fleshlight as moans flow through his spit-slick lips. You can tell he’s almost there and you pull the fleshlight away and reach for the cup but it's too late, his seed shooting out and landing on your belly, marking you with it and trailing down slowly towards your pussy.

"Shit, sorry." He groans apologetically but he’s too weak to do anything about it. Exhausted from the three back to back orgasms, he falls back to the bed, boneless. 

You sigh, setting the cup down and getting up to grab some tissues to clean yourself up. When you walk back to the bed, you find Chan struggling to keep his eyes open. 

“No, no, get up. Come on, you need to wash off.” You tug on his arm, but his body is too heavy to budge. 

“I’m too tired.” He whines like a puppy trying to get out of a bath.

“You won't have to do anything. You just sit in the tub and I’ll clean you up.” You try to pull at his arm again but he just buries his face in the pillows and ignores you. You sigh, running your hand over his skin patiently. “Come one, don’t you want a nice, warm bath? Wouldn’t it feel good after all this effort? It’ll loosen your muscles right up.”

He lifts his head up, regarding you, and you brush the hair out of his face softly. “Come on, puppy. I’m tired too.” 

He finally complies, getting up and letting you tug him towards the bathroom. You don’t give him a real bath, you just make him sit in the tub while you scrub and clean his body, letting the warm water stream over him and wash the soap and tension away. 

By the time you’re done, he was starting to doze off again. He looked really cute like that, his eyes almost all the way closed and his lips in a slight pout as he tries to keep his head up. 

You pat his cheek gently, drawing his attention towards you. “Get up, pup. We’re done.” 

He nods groggily and slowly stands up. You dry him off with a towel then lead him to your bed, telling him to wait a minute while you go grab something for him to wear. You know he likes sleeping in only his boxers so you just grab that and come back, handing it to him to put on while you go grab a towel for yourself. 

“I’m gonna go take a shower. I want you back in your room when I’m back.” 

Your words jolt him awake, his eyes wide and alert suddenly. “What? But I thought...” He trails off, looking at you as if asking for you to help finish his sentence. Which is just ridiculous, you don’t, of course. You stare at him with a blank face until he continues in a small voice, "I was hoping I could stay."

“What gave you that impression? You thought you could manipulate me into fucking you and then everything will be fine and dandy?”

“No. I just really miss you.” He states helplessly, and tears spring up into your eyes at that. 

I miss you. You’re special. These are all meaningless words that just serve to put another stab in your heart and remind you of what you’ll never actually have from him. 

“I don’t have the energy for this right now.” You say weakly, turning your back around and heading for the door quickly. “Just leave.”

As soon as you get into the shower, you start to sob. You feel like shit. You've gone through so much abuse and ridicule before but this has to be the worst you’ve ever felt about yourself, for yourself. You have so easily given into him. He’s got you where he wants you again, and he didn't even have to compromise anything to get it. You just walked right into it like an idiot, and now you fear that you feel too much for him to get out of this intact. 

You stay a long time in the shower, waiting for your tears to dry up, but they never do. All you can manage is to get them to stop streaming down your face like the water does, holding them in your eyes and hoping the long shower allowed enough time for Chan’s scent to disperse from your room. 

But when you walk back into your room, towel wrapped snugly around your body, you find Chan himself still in there, sitting on top of your newly made bed. And just like that, the tears fight to be shed again.  

“I changed the sheets.” He pipes up, looking at you for approval. 

“Oh, you changed the sheets? I guess I have to let you stay now.” Your retort is weak and hoarse.  “Baby…” He stands up and walks over to you, reaching a hand out to tug at your own gently, but you quickly snatch it back and take a step away from him, 

”Don’t.”  Your voice cracks and you turn away in a panic, not wanting him to see you shed any tears for him. But it's useless as he easily turns you back towards him and wraps you in his strong arms. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asks like he genuinely cares.

"You're what's wrong!" You sob, trying and failing to to get out of his embrace.

“Don’t say that.” He pleads, wiping your tears and kissing each of your cheeks despite your struggles. “Please, don’t cry.” 

“How can I not when I’ve fallen in love with you.” You scream the words at him, hoping that the sheer heartache your voice contains will cast him away from you. And for a moment it seems to work as he staggers at your confession, his face a look of pure shock. This is it. He'll finally take pity on you and stop messing with you. Or at the very least he'll realize that this game isn't fun anymore and he'll back off.

“Just leave me be, please.” You plead, trying once again to pull away from his now loose embrace, but as soon as you move, he snaps out of it, his grip tightening around you even more. Pushing his forehead against yours, he breathes out, “I love you too.” 

Before you can think about it, you raise your hands to scratch at him, anything to defend yourself from the continuous torment he’s subjecting you to. You only manage a weak swipe at his cheek before he has both your wrists in his grip and pinned to your back. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” He curses, the tiniest bit of blood seeping out of the fresh wound in the middle of his cheek.

“Stop playing with me!”

"I'm not playing! I love you." He shouts back at you, and his words hurt like a dozen pellets piercing your skin. Because either he’s sick enough to lie about this, to continue playing with you despite how precarious your position has become, or he really does love you but his disgust at you is so great that it doesn’t matter.

"How can you say that when you’re ashamed of being with me? How can that be love?" 

"You're one to talk! I'm always the one trying not to lose you and you're always the one pushing me away. What does it matter whether people know about us or not when you’re fucking crying at the mere fact that you fell in love with me?"

“I'm crying because the man I fell in love with is so ashamed of loving me that he won't even defend me in front of his friends!"

"And if I do? If I tell everyone that I love you and take all the damage and then you inevitably leave me?" He accuses, so sure of his words like he knows it will happen. All the fight leaves your body at that. He’ll never trust you, will he? 

"Why are you assuming the worst of me?" You snivel weakly.

"No, you can’t pull that shit!” He rages, “You don’t have the right to treat me like shit and then cry about the fact that I don’t trust you! I have every right to be scared that in a couple of months you'll look at me and remember how much of an impotent predator you think I am and drop me."

“Then why do you keep me around?” You ask in a small voice, scared of the answer. 

“I… I don’t know.” 

You laugh bitterly, but Chan stays silent, rooted to his spot and waiting for you to do or say something. You can’t handle this anymore, not now at least. Every time the two of you talk, you hate yourself more. You need to get away from him or you’re afraid you’ll collapse into a void of self-loathing you’ll never be able to pull yourself out from. 

Sighing wearily, you slowly shuffle to your closet. You drop your towel and put on some underwear before you start pulling on a pair of pants and a shirt. 

“What are you doing?” Chan fumes as he realises what you’re doing. “Are you going out?!”  

You stay silent as you pick out some shoes and put them on.

“Are you fucking kidding me? You can’t go out right now. We’re talking!” 

You ignore him once again, walking towards the door. He tries to intercept you, face red, “You’re not leaving!”

“Watch me.” You say coldly, going around him and walking out the door. 

___________

You didn’t have a place in mind when you went out. You just needed to breathe, to get some fresh air. But you soon find that too sobering, the fresh wounds hurting too much for you to feel them right now. So you decided you’ll do the opposite, stop feeling. And how do you do that? Everyone’s favorite poison. And so you head to the nearest bar you can find.

You’re barely finished with your first glass when you hear a deep voice digging its way through your fuzzy hearing. “Hey! You’re that fox from Chan’s place, right?” 

Your heart stops at the sound of his name, and you stare at the empty glass in your hand, determined to ignore the intruder until he goes away. But he just plops down into the seat across from you, exclaiming ever louder. “It is you!”

You stay silent, and he carries on, thinking you don’t recognize him. “I’m Felix by the way if you don’t remember.”

You still don’t give him any response, but he doesn’t give up. "I'm sorry, I didn't really get your name last time..." He trails off, looking at you expectantly. Your gaze shifts to him and he falters when he sees the dead look in your eyes.

After some pause, he drops the cheery look from his face, and says somberly, "Look, I know you probably hate us all because of what happened, and you have every right to, but I just want to apologize for what my friends said. They're really good people but they can be a lot misguided."

You snort mockingly at that, but he seems encouraged that he managed to get any form of response from you, and he continues on. “But you probably don’t want to hear that right now. Anyway, I just really wanted to apologize. I know how it feels to be distrusted because of what you are.” 

That gets your attention, and you look at him closely, realizing he is a cat hybrid. They get the same lot as fox hybrids, albeit less severe if the fact that he’s friends with Chan and his pack is anything to go by. 

“But you’re friends with them.” You comment suspiciously. 

“Well, it’s because Chan took me under his wing. When he trusted me, the others did too. I kind of owe him a lot.” 

“Ah, yes, the Perfect Chan agenda.”

“He’s definitely not perfect." He clarifies quickly, and you quirk an eyebrow at that. "Don't get me wrong, I love him like a brother but he can be really stubborn sometimes. He can never let himself be wrong about anything ever or else he'll start spiraling."

“No offense--umm, Felix, was it?” You ask and he nods eagerly, happy that you're talking. “If I wanted to chat about Chan I would've talked to one of his groupies.” 

His face blooms red and he sputters sheepishly, “You're right! I just wanted to apologize.”

“Apology accepted.” You say dismissively, waving him away, but he stays, and you give him an exasperated look.

He breaks eye contact, his gaze dropping to his hands.Fiddling with the cup in his hands, he mumbles quietly, “Can I hang out with you for a bit?”

“Now why would I say yes to that?”

He thinks for a while, a pout on his face as he concentrates on finding an answer that will satisfy you. You can see the exact moment an idea pops into his head as his face lights up with a mischievous smile. “Because it will piss off Chan?”

“A kitty after my own heart.” You reach out to pet his head, chuckling at the blush on his pretty face intensifies at that

 ____________________________________

Felix is something else, you’ll give him that. He’s sweet and cute and he radiates so much warmth and happiness. He’s different from the usual cat hybrids who are cold and aloof even if secretly affectionate. You had wondered at the beginning how a cat hybrid can be so close to Chan and his pack, but it took a whole five minutes of being in his company for you to see it. Simply, Felix exuded a pure, happy energy that was infectious to everyone around him. Even you, down in the dumps and heartbroken, were starting to feel a little better in his presence. 

Or maybe that was the inordinate amount of alcohol you have managed to consume throughout the time you spent together. And you guess it was quite some time because as soon as you stumble through the door to Chan’s apartment, the wolf is on you like a dog with a bone. 

“Where were you? I was worried sick!”

“Now that’s a funny joke.” You slur, laughing stupidly.

“Are you drunk?” He bellows, sniffing you out. Then he suddenly freezes, a low growl rumbling out of him as he grabs you roughly, glaring at you with wild eyes. "Why do you smell like Felix?"

"I met up with him." You shrug, maddeningly jubilant to the livid wolf. 

“What?” 

“I. met. up. with. him” You repeat slowly.

"You went out drinking with Felix?" You grits carefully, and you swear you can almost see his eyes grow dark and menacing. But you’re too blissfully drunk to heed the warning storming inside their depths. 

"Sure did." You reply nonchalantly. 

"I told you…” He says slowly, lips curling around the words and infusing them with a cold fury.  “to stay away from my friends."

"We were just talking." You insist stubbornly, needing him to see for once that you’re not the twisted monster he thinks you are. “He said he’d like to be friends.” 

Chan’s grip tightens even more around your arms, so much so that it pierces through the foggy numbness of your intoxication. The pain brings about a sense of sobriety, and your breath stills as you become aware of much danger you were in right now. 

But Chan wasn’t going to hurt you. Not physically at least. 

You feel the blood return to your arms as he lets you go, a look of revulsion and contempt vilifying his face more than anger or violence ever could. 

“Stay away from him.” He commands roughly, “I actually care about him.”

Any numbness you had gotten from the alcohol suddenly leaves your body and you crash, feeling all the pain all at once. 

I actually care about him. Unlike you. And you’ll sully him if you get close. 

“This--” You gesture between the both of you, face completely devoid of emotion. "is over."

________________________

A/N: you guys still want them together? because I think the next chapter will be the last. i mean it won’t matter anyway cuz I’m pretty settled on the ending lol but I’d still like to know

[weirdochick56]

The Bodyguard 2- Bucky Barnes AU

Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Princess!Reader

Warnings: Explicit language, insults, snark, and sassy!Buckster sexy times (ok, so maybe only slightly sexy)

Disclaimers: I don’t own any MCU plots or Characters mentioned

Word Count: 5, 173 words

Summary: The Reader and Bucky’s hate for eachother is at an all time high; she can’t seem to rid herself of him and he, well he can’t seem to get her to cooperate with him. But as their frustrations grow, a late-night outing might just be what they both need to see other parts of eachother. 

A/n: This has been a long time in the making, but I finally felt inspired enough to continue the story. Hope you enjoy it!

~The Bodyguard 1~

***

“You can stop following me now,” you grumble with thorny irritation, rolling your eyes at the tall persistent shadow staying hot on your tail. 

It was in vain to ask him to leave, you knew. Agent Brainless was ridiculously adamant about following you around the moment you stepped foot outside of the palace and he was -infuriatingly so- a stubborn man.

How he knew that you were leaving even when you had concocted what you considered a genius plan to evade those infuriatingly pretty grey irises was beyond you.

He sighs at your words, and you can see the annoyance bubbling to the surface of his cold professional exterior, though he tries his hardest to keep a straight face. 

“Your highness, I think we both know I won’t do that,” he responds simply. “Now if you would please stop being so stubborn and simply do as I ask and come with me to the car so that this is easier for us both...” 

You can tell his patience is wearing thin because, in the past few weeks of having him follow you everywhere you went, you had made it a point to figure out his exact breaking point. 

And as you continue making your escape to town like he isn’t even there, you know that so is yours. If there’s anything that can give you that deep burning satisfaction you sought with everything you did, it was pissing Agent Barnes off.

He had patiently asked you to retreat back the way you came so he could “safely” transport you in a castle-owned car, but you refused redundantly because your friend was already waiting for you, but maybe also because you loved the little twitch of his eye every time you refused to listen to his directions.

If you were being completely honest, he really should’ve been asking you to come back to the castle and not go to a club in town at all- as per your father’s orders. But you weren’t fond of said orders and you definitely didn’t want some dark and mysterious shadow following you around during a night of fun with friends. 

“No,” is all you say because in the few minutes you’ve spent talking to him you’ve noticed he’s the most infuriated when your responses are curt and nonchalant. 

You want to see him snap oh so bad...seeing those steely grays lose their cool? Gold. 

“Princess...” he growls in warning, daring you to cut that little thread of control he had left in him with your sharp tongue. 

You don’t look back at him even once enjoying the thrill that travels up your spine at his low-timbre words and the way his voice travels straight to your core, tugging at your short black dress lightly. 

You wanted to see what he would do should he be pushed over the edge. It was fun.

“I already told you, I’m not listening to you. My friend is already waiting for me. And I’m sorry if you have an issue with- Ahh!” Your words choke back into your throat and morph into a shocked yelp when big rough hands grip your hips, spinning you around and without much of a warning, lifting you with incredible ease.

Before you know it, you’re being carelessly thrown over a broad, strong shoulder.

You let out a small ‘oomph’ when the wind gets knocked out of you and all you see is a firm ass, the blood rushing to your head. 

“What the hell do your think you’re doing you absolute buffoon?!” You screech hysterically, wriggling aggressively against his hold on your thighs. 

He barely flinches, only wrapping his muscular arm tighter around your legs and adjusting you on his shoulder like it was a mere midnight stroll for him and you weighed no more than what a feather did. 

“I’m taking you to the car,” he informs as if it’s obvious, voice full with obnoxious satisfaction. 

“Get your filthy hands off me this instant you utter and complete idiot!” You growl, twisting harshly but he doesn’t let go so you start pounding on his firm back with your fists, fighting to free yourself of him. “WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!”

He just laughs at what seems to be your weak attempts to break away. He laughs.

You gasp at the absolute and complete audacity he has of laughing when he’s treating you, the single heir to the Androvian throne, like a sack of potatoes. 

“You ass!” You wriggle around some more, tugging at his hands to try to pry them off your legs but all he does is smack them away as if they were mere pesky flies. 

“I may be,” he chokes back a small snort but only barely. “But at least I’m the only ass trying to keep your reckless self in check, princess.”

Indignation, humiliation, and utter vexation all burn deep inside you like a thrumming fire ready to ravage everything in its way when it got the chance to escape your body as you slowly fall limp against him. 

Resignation comes hand in hand with the deep desire for revenge and you fist your hands in deep ache to somehow exercise it. 

He carries you all the way to the garage of cars in the back part of the castle, walks over to a black SUV out of all the expensive cars to choose from, opens it and all but throws you into the back leather seats like you’re not a fucking human, much less the princess of the land he’s currently stepping in. 

You land flat on your back in the smooth leather interior of the luxury SUV with a small thud and instantly sit up to glare at him heatedly. “Do you have any idea who I am? Be gentle, you brute!” 

Annoyingly enough, he simply ignores you and leans over your body. His heat floods through your bare skin and feels good for a second and you subtly inhale his musky scent as he tugs on the seatbelt, roughly pulling it over you. 

You forget about your hatred for him for a split second and that only makes you angrier when it comes back full force. 

You fucking idiot, Y/n. 

In a last and desperate attempt of defiance, you try to push his hands away to which he responds by firmly pressing you back by your shoulder into your seat and staring you dead in the eye with blazing grey eyes. 

The fire that swirls in them is...something. Not necessarily scary, but intimidating and...something else.

Something that makes your skin flush and your nerves throb to life. 

You stare right back, tilting your chin up to show him you weren’t backing down or scared of him and his brute force. He got too under your skin and you knew you got under his which only offered you only a limited amount of comfort. 

He clenches his jaw as he clicks the seatbelt into place, never looking away from your challenging gaze. As if to stick another dagger into your burning insides. As if to reassert his power here. 

Your labored breaths are all that can be heard for miles to come in the calm night air and he leans close for a second, your heaving chests gently brushing.

Not meaning for it to happen, you feel your nipples harden beneath the flimsy fabric of your black party dress and you wonder if you imagine his hands clenching around your shoulder -his fingers digging into your flesh with suppression- or the sly flick of his eyes from your eyes to your lips. 

You wonder if you imagine the look of heat that passes over his eyes when your breaths mix the second time seems to stop and an overwhelming emotion washes over you. 

But then it’s gone as soon as it came and hatred burns deep in your belly once more. So deep that it hurts and brings painful tears to your eyes, your nose burning so hard you can’t focus through your blurry vision.

You lean in closer, so close your nose is brushing just barely against his and pause for a second. A second of torture for him, a second of uncertainty, a second where his breath catches and his pupils dilate. 

Then you speak, voice trembling with overwhelming anger. 

“I have never,” you whisper, licking your lips. “Been treated with such disrespect.” You swallow hard, cheeks red with humiliation. 

You see a flash of guilt in his eyes but it’s quickly replaced by his usual look of cool professionalism- not even anger anymore. Not even that.

And he leans right back into you, a wave of heat passing over both of you. “Then learn to listen next time. It’s for your safety.” 

And just like that he’s drawing back, slamming the passenger door closed and climbing into the driver’s seat- leaving you cold and angry beyond reason.

A moment of tense silence passes before he releases a tiny sigh and breaks it by turning on the ignition. 

“Where are we going?”

*

BUCKY’S POV

I watch her laugh at something one of her friends says from a dark corner of the club and it’s hard not to stare for reasons other than my duty being just that...to look after her. 

The club was a luxurious one, with high ceilings, intricate designs and a VIP section where we were immediately escorted to.

Her Highness’s friends, a blonde guy and girl who had nodded at me in polite acknowledgment were already waiting for her there and I assumed that the few seconds when she had stopped her sulking and taken out her phone from her clutch were the seconds she was texting her friends to meet her there instead. 

I would never admit it, but I enjoyed watching her cave. It was like taming a wild horse, even if momentarily. 

Princess Y/n was a brat, plain and simple. Selfish, childish, and feisty as hell, I had never met anyone as completely and utterly vexing as her and to say these past few weeks had been hell would be an understatement. 

If I wasn’t so good at my job, I would’ve lost her already. She threw me for a loop any chance she got, cutting corners and doing everything she could to avoid my protection. 

As I stared at her with that pretty ass smile on her annoyingly beautiful face, it’s hard to imagine that that was the same person pushing every single one of my buttons just a few minutes before. 

She actually looked relaxed and...nice?

God, she infuriated me in ways I had no idea I could be infuriated, discovered buttons I didn’t know I had and pushed them to the point I had to throw her over my damn shoulder like a sack of flour.

I was a professional, for God’s sake. Had always been one with every single one of the cases I was assigned, so why was she the one to get under my skin?

...And why did I enjoy having her perfectly round ass so close to my face? Why did I keep thinking about the defiance in those stupidly big eyes over and over like I....craved it?

I wondered to myself as I watched her take down a shot by the bar. She glanced at me over her shoulder, still smiling, but it quickly melted away when our gazes clashed and my own mood soured instantly. 

I grimaced when she looked away as if I had burnt her with my eyes and quickly pulled my head out of the gutter. 

The fact that she was utterly gorgeous didn’t change how annoying she was. Not to mention I was here on a job. 

One I fully intended to complete, no matter how fucking difficult the client was.

*

The night moves on at a slow pace for me. The princess parties and I watch her like a hawk, making sure not to let her get too wild. 

So far I had pried off five guys who were trying their luck with her. From what I’d read on her file and the extensive research I’d done online, her face wasn’t really well known. 

She was always kept  secret and would be until she was crowned queen of Androvia- some weird old belief or something- so not many people knew what she looked like. 

Meaning, these guys probably didn’t know who they were trying to get all handsy with on the dance floor and would only assume was some rich daddy’s girl once my towering form appeared and nicely escorted them away. 

For the most part nicely, anyway. Some I had to get a little rougher with. 

I make sure to keep my eyes glued on her form, ignoring the way she moved her hips in that tiny black dress. It hugged her alluring curves like a glove and I swallowed hard as she grinded on her female friend, head thrown back and a free smile on her face. 

“She is...beautiful, isn’t she?” 

I calmly turn towards the voice as it hums out from beside me, turning to see the guy she came with. He takes a sip of his drink, smirking as his eyes remain on the way the princess waves her hands in the air to the beat of the song, sensually shaking her hips as if she was one with the sexy R&B song I had no idea the name of. 

I clear my throat, remaining stock still in my bodyguard pose. “Sir, I”m only here to protect her Highness. I really don’t-”

“Oh don’t even try to hide it. She’s easily the most beautiful woman in this whole club.”

He takes my silence as confirmation, it seems, because he proceeds to speak on as if I’ve agreed.

“But it’s not just her physical appearance is it? It’s something else. Something...inside,” he whispers. 

When I don’t respond, he continues bitterly. “I’m warning you; don’t fall for her. It’ll only bring you a world of pain, trust me.”

I catch the pain in his voice and stiffen. “I would never fall for one of my subjects, sir,” I assure him.

He laughs sourly. “Sure bud. You keep telling yourself that.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” I insist, swallowing thickly as she laughs, beautiful smile wide and her laughter too melodious to be coming out of such a wretched little urchin. 

“Well,” he coughs suddenly, clapping me in the shoulder. “I think I need another drink. Want one?”

I eye his hand which he slowly pries off and shake my head with a slightly clenched jaw.

“I’m on the job, sir,” I remain calm and professional despite the fact that all I wanted to do was break that hand for putting stupid thoughts in my head. 

Because for a second there, as the bright club lights shun down on her, I could see what he talked about when he said there was something inside. In that smile, those eyes, that laugh...

But then she made eye contact with me and the feeling turned bitter so quick it’s a miracle I didn’t get whiplash. 

She was a brat. Nothing more.

*

YOUR POV

Sometime late into the night, you had found myself fairly buzzed. Not enough to fall on your face, but enough that walking- well, stumbling over to Agent Asshole only seemed more and more attractive an action.

He glances at you with those eyes and you can’t help the anger the bubbles within you. “Do you plan on staring me down the entire night?”

“It’s my job,” is all he says. 

You scowl fiercely at him. “I hate you,” you seethe.

He raises a dark brow but otherwise keeps that stoic expression on his face. “Do you want to leave, your Highness?”

His neutral tone and complete lack of reaction only angers you more and you shake your head furiously. “No, I don’t want to leave. I want you to leave though.”

He presses his lips firmly together. “I’m sorry-“

“No, you’re not.”

“Huh?” He cocks his side slightly to the side and you lean closer to him, craning your neck to look him in the eye.

“I said; you’re not sorry. If you were sorry, you WOULD LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!” You feel your drunken emotions deep in your chest and without much effort, your voice quickly escalates.

He sighs heavily. “Okay, your highness, I think it’s time I take you back to the castle. C’mon,” he waves a hand toward the door.

You laugh at him coldly, shaking your head. “Who do you think you are, ordering me around? Know your place asshole, you are below me- never forget,” you growl snarkily, leaning right into his face.

You feel his breathing quicken against your cheeks the longer you defiantly smirk up at him, his calm eyes darkening.

You realized you enjoyed pushing him to the edge, that you craved this look on his face...

He smirks mockingly down at you, staring you down. “You can come willingly, your highness, or I can throw you over my shoulder like last time.” He leans straight into your ear, whispering hotly. “I’m sure you would rather not go through the embarrassment.”

You swallow thickly, your heart hammering against your chest and you’re not sure it’s from anger anymore. With disgust, you jerk away from him, glaring holes into his head.

“Let’s go.”

*

“You can go, Agent Obnoxious,” you mumble drunkenly, waving a dismissive hand at him as you stumble into your warm room, practically ripping off your heels.

You throw them somewhere in the corner of the large room, sighing with relief when you feel your bare feet touching the soft carpeted floor. 

Your knees shake slightly and buckle and you end up tripping forward.

You land on the ground with a soft grunt and for some reason, laughter bubbles deep in your chest.

“Your Highness!”

A few seconds later, you feel strong warm hands wrapping around your body to heave you up. You place your hands on his strong arms for support and look up at Agent Barnes.

The laughter immediately dies on your lips when you see a beautiful concerned frown of engraved deep in his face. It looks so sincere and his arms are so strong...

Before you know what you’re doing, a small mumble is leaving your lips. “You...” you cut yourself off abruptly when his eyes meet yours.

His hands now rest lightly on your waist, and you’re so close you can smell him. His scent is deep and rich and manly, so unlike the scent of those rich assholes you were forced to mingle with on a daily basis.

And his hands, are strong and resilient. The callouses on them tells you that he’s worked his entire life. Those hands, the ones holding you right now, They’ve probably handled a gun, they’ve probably saved so many lives...

You bite your lip, thinking about the way those hands felt on the skin of your arm and how heavenly it would feel if it traveled all over.

Goosebumps rise on your skin as you crane up your neck to stare up at him.

He stares down at you, and even when your room is dark, the light of the moonlight that filters in from the huge window highlights the heavy tension in his gaze.

You’re both unmoving and you wonder if he enjoys touching you as much as you enjoy his touch.

He inhaled deeply, his eyes flickering to your lips and eyes and then back.

You want to ask him what he’s thinking. You want to tell him to just do it -to just kiss you because you wouldn’t dare push him away- not in this state, not when the alcohol and his scent and eyes were clogging every single sense and reason you had, but you’re afraid to break the spell of whatever this was. 

So instead, you wait on abated breath, feeling like you’re both on the verge of something utterly earth-shattering, for him to move.

Finally, he speaks a few seconds later and it’s a quiet murmur. “Let’s get you to bed, princess.”

You ignore the sharp sting of his rejection when you were so clearly begging him to kiss you and step away from his touch as if he’s burnt you.

You turn around so he can’t see the hurt in your eyes. “You can go now Agent Brainless,” you say coldly over your shoulder, but you know it’s a lot softer than the other time.

Another second passes. “Princess..” he whispers.

You ignore his barely audible whisper and angrily begin undressing, tugging at the straps of your dress.

“What in the world do you think you’re doing?” He growls lowly as you begin to pull your dress down to your waist.

With a sarcastic smile, your turn towards him, your top half completely naked aside from your black lacy bra.

His gaze immediately falls on your half-naked chest, but aside from the small flicker in his eyes and gulp he takes, he gives no other indication of shock.

You raise a brow. “Are you going to watch me undress now too, Agent Barnes?” You ask mockingly.

His eyes find yours again and they’re darker than you’ve ever seen them. They send shivers through your whole body and you almost give into the urge to look away, but the anger and frustration within you don’t allow your gaze to waver.

“I’m not leaving until you’re safely in bed,” he husks, clearly trying his best to remain professional and cold as his icy stare bores into your eyes- purposefully looking away from your naked form.

You tilt your head up at him innocently, slowly sauntering closer to him. “Oh? Well in that case, do you mind helping me with the zipper of my dress? It’s stuck.”

You turn your back on him and a smirk blossoms in your face as you hear his breathing strain, your ass slightly brushing against his crotch area. 

He blows out a shaky exhale and it blows against your naked back, all hot and angry. 

When he makes no move to help you, you look at him over your shoulder. “Well?” 

His grave expression doesn’t budge. “I can’t do that,” he says lowly. 

But even as he resentfully spits this, he doesn’t budge and his eyes are still tracing over your body, their electric desire leaving goosebumps over wherever they ran over.

You roll your eyes at him. “Then turn around, you idiot.” 

He growls, fisting his hands and clenching his jaw tightly but doesn’t try to fight you on it and turns his broad back to you.

You’re intoxicated, so it’s probably because you’re not thinking straight, but as you quickly slip on a silk night gown and stare at his back, you can’t help the deep heavy sadness that sinks into your chest. 

Why hadn’t he kissed you just now? You could’ve sworn he wanted to and you sure as hell did...it was there, the moment, the split second when you were willing to risk it all, to overlook any and all boundaries, cross all imposing lines- but you lost it. 

Pushing your hair to the side, you convince yourself it was for the best. 

“I’m done,” you say softly, climbing into bed. 

Agent Barnes nods at you stiffly, turning on his heels to leave as you get under the covers. Blaming this on your intoxication, you suddenly find yourself exclaiming. 

“Wait!” 

He pauses right before his foot moves outside the doorframe and turns toward you, eyebrows raised. “You need something, Your Highness?”

You stare at him seriously, pressing your head against your pillow. “Don’t...leave, please,” you whisper softly, curling into a ball at the tenderness of your voice.

“I don’t want to be alone,” you admit quietly. 

He freezes, staring at you as if he’d never seen you before and you avert your gaze, afraid maybe you let on too much. 

“Sorry,” you quickly apologize, but that only flusters you more. “I-I mean not sorry, you asshole. Just- whatever. I’m in bed now, you can go.” 

Feeling embarrassed, you quickly flip over and turn your back to him.  

Seconds later, you hear the door click close and then nothing. A heavy sigh escapes you and you try to suppress the feeling of disappointment that envelops your whole body. 

You didn’t know if it was the drinks or the cold distant dinners you’d been having with your family...but you had never felt more alone. All the clubbing and trying to escape your destiny by trying to pave a life of your own couldn’t fill in that emptiness you couldn’t get rid of no matter how hard you tried.  

You didn’t want to feel like that anymore. Not tonight. 

So even if it was your bodyguard who you hated with everything in you, you needed someone just to be there. Even if it was just to sit in silence with.  

Suddenly, you hear a gentle swish noise and gasp lightly, flipping over. Agent Barnes has thrown his jacket over the chair beside your bed and is loosening his tie and he stares at you. His beautiful gaze sucks you in as you blink up at him in surprise. 

He shrugs. “I can’t just....leave you here alone.” 

Your chest clenches painfully and warmth travels all over your body like warm gooey honey. The feeling of having someone there for you when you need them most is almost overwhelmingly strong. 

“Thank you,” you whisper so quietly, you’re shocked he even hears it. 

He tilts his head at you, frowning with that handsome face of his. “For what? It’s my job.” 

There he goes detaching himself. With a gentle shrug, you nod and curl into a ball under your covers, trying to covet sleep. 

You try this for a few minutes and you’re tired, but you can’t help thinking about Agent Barnes sitting in a hard chair all night. After a while of tossing and turning, you sit up. 

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” you breathe with irritation. 

“What? What happened?” he sits up instantly, and though you could tell he was on the verge of dozing off, his sharp senses are impressive as he reaches for the gun on his ankle frantically. 

You sigh, hating the way your cheeks grow hot and you look away timidly. “Just get into bed,” you say roughly. 

“What?”

You bite your lip, looking at him in the eyes. “I said; get into bed with me. That chair is uncomfortable.” 

He laughs lightly. “Princess, I was trained by the world’s best assassins. I was taught to sleep on a cold concrete ground if need be.” He gives the chair a firm pat. “This chair is a luxury for a guy like me.”

You stare at him for a few seconds more, wondering more about his past before lightly shaking your head. 

“I don’t care. I still feel bad that I made you sleep here on a chair. Just get in already, will you?” You growl at his stubbornness. “The bed is huge, there’ll be enough space for the both of us, if that’s what you’re concerned about,” you add on, softly. 

After a few seconds of intense eye contact, he finally relents with a small sigh. “Fine.” 

Hesitantly, he cuffs his sleeves and perches himself on the edge of the bed- all stiff and tight. “Good?” He asks, glancing at you with raised brows.

You frown. “You’re kidding.”

“What?”

“You’re not actually planning to sleep like that are you?” You snort. 

“I told you-”

“That you were trained by dangerous assassins, yeah yeah. But you’re still a human and a ridiculous one at that,” you scoff before suddenly smirking.  “You’re not afraid of lil old me, are you? I’m tiny- I couldn’t possibly hurt you...too much,” you offer him a faux innocent smile, batting your lashes. 

He stares at you, a small smirk tugging at his lips. “Oh trust me, I’ve met girls like you before. You definitely don’t bite.” 

You raise a brow amusedly. “Girls like me?”

His sexy smirk widens. “Yeah. You’re all bark but no bite,” he replies vaguely.

Feeling partially indignant and partially curious, you decide to probe him for answers. “Oh yeah?”

He can’t resist your subtle challenge and continue speaking. “You’re always in power, constantly being chased after because you’re beautiful and rich and you act like it’s what you want in a guy, but it isn’t, is it?”

Deeply intrigued by his generally accurate analysis, you can’t help but laugh. “Oh?”

“No.” He stares deeply into your eyes and the smile slips off your lips as he says his next words with the intensity of a thousand suns. “You bark out orders and you take on responsibilities like a boss, but what you really want is a man. Not a pushover boy that’ll listen to your every command and constantly try to please you, fall at your feet...But a man that’ll choke slam you on the bed, that’ll make you his, that’ll torture you with the deepest pits of hellish pleasure until he ruins every other man for you. You want to be controlled, brought over the edge so far you won’t ever be able to go there by yourself and then at the last moment get that taken away from you. You want to be used.” 

You openly gape at him but he ignores you and slightly scoots closer, still at a safe distance, but close enough where you can feel his body heat radiating off of him.

“Sleep, Princess,” he whispers. “I’ll keep an eye out for you.”

At first, you’re too shocked to react. Your heart is positively hammering against your ribcage and your cheeks are uncharacteristically red. You were flushed. How had he managed to...’you know what?’ You think. ‘No.’ 

You breathe in deeply. ‘ I’m not going to think about it anymore.’

Because doing so would mean letting him win. And also, never mind the fact that he’s in your bed right now...

Decidedly, you squeeze your eyes shut, begging sleep to come amidst all your stupid, surely drunken thoughts about your stupid bodyguard and kissing him, or simply straddling him right now...

Despite how much you disliked him, you felt safe and protected, like you could let your guard down. And yet...not enough. 

Soon, lulled by the steady beating of his heart and the warmth of his body, you curl into a ball and slowly let your heavy lids close, relaxing completely.

“Oh, and Agent Brainless?” you murmur, on the very verge of sleep. 

“Yes, princess?” He looks at you. 

You manage to send him one last cold smirk before answering.  

“Don’t misinterpret this, right now. I’m merely asking you to do your job.” 

And then darkness takes over.

Before fully giving into the softness of the darkness of slumber, though, you think you hear him laugh softly and say something like “wouldn’t dream of it, brat.” 

****

They’re honestly growing on me. Should I continue?

ALSO YALL SEE TFATWS????  SEBASTIAN LOOKS SO DARN GOOD PLEASEEEEEE

A special thanks to:

@lilypalmer1987

@jessikared97

@sammykb1994

@mogaruke

@mo-onstarrs

@loveofmychips @juliesland​

[draconpyrothayan]

Okay, so I’m actually going a little obsessive about guessing what the party comp for C3 will be. Reblog with your own guesses and theories, please!

To look forward, I tend to look back, so let’s see what folks have played so far:

Ashley :  Between War Cleric and Aasimar Zealot, homegirl is circling a Paladin like a stalking panther. She likes to be a damage monster, and she likes to have a divine connection. We also haven’t had any mainclass Paladins in the campaign thus far - both Fjord and Vax went at least 9 levels as non-pally first. This also allows Ashley to be charismatic, which lets her glory in the fact that she’s allowed to be here all campaign this time.

Laura :  Vex and Jester are a study in contrasts, and I am fairly certain that C3′s character will also be different. Having gone through my entire list of characters with her as a Wildcard, I realized the group doesn’t have a Barbarian yet - between Grog and Yasha, they really do love having them in the party, and imagine how hype Travis would be when she rages the first time.

Liam :  After Vax and Caleb, I’m guessing that Liam’s character in campaign 3 will also be dark. I’m further guessing that he will either take an early Actor, Alert, or Observant feat, because he does seem to delight in finding ways to make Matt have to think very quickly on his toes. However, his statement that his character is “Just some guy” makes me think he’ll be a Changeling Fighter or Ranger - he clearly enjoys being a backliner, and he’s aware enough of the mechanics to know the *massive* boost to Ranger that was given in Tasha’s. He’d avoid Beastmaster to stay away from Vex/Frumpkin parallels though. As far as Changeling is concerned... yeah. You don’t go from a human to saying “I’m just some guy” as your next character without it being an in-character protestation.

Marisha :  She’s been wise. She’s been smart. And now, she’s going to actually have proficiency in Persuasion. It’s no coincidence that Beau was fashioned out of Keyleth’s pain-points, and this particular issue was her most common plead with Beau. Moreover, there is a class that the party hasn’t really gotten to play with in some time that would fit the Charismatic role quite well that still gets to be an efficient note-taker. A role that I like to call the Arcanist (Full-caster of an arcane tradition, like Scanlan and Caleb have been) that gets to go ham with Identify and Sending and general arcana... I think Marisha’s going to be a Sorcerer. Possibly Shadow or Clockwork - Draconic’s too Tiberius, Storm’s too Keyleth, Wild Magic’s too Chaos Crew, and Aberrant Mind’s too Eyes of Nine. Possibly Divine, if they wind up not getting a Cleric.

Sam :  The only character he actually built for himself was a UA class that changed heavily between his c1 appearance and its eventual printing. However, he confirmed that Liam made his character again, so this time we are definitely looking at Scanlan and Veth moreso than Tary for this question. So to that end - Either he’ll be another small race, or one of the absolute massive folks. And he’ll be a class that can easily lead to in-character jokes, but with High Wisdom this time (to match previous Charisma and Intelligence). Thus, either Druid or Cleric.

Talesin :  Mollymauk was a mirror of Percy. Their souls and appearances were yin and yang. A study in contrast, designed to be as different from the former and from first impressions as possible. Caduceus was a mirror of Mollymauk. Their souls and appearances were yin and yang. Et c. et c. The fact that he managed this without making Percy again shows that he reflected himself across a different axis. I suspect we will see a character that is the opposite of Caduceus along another axis. Intelligent. Foolish. A different chaotic energy than Mollymauk. A mad scientist, of a different discipline than Percy. An Armorer.

Travis:  As with Ashley, this is a guy who likes the big numbers. And there is one infamous variety of big numbers he’s not played yet - Sneak Attack. He got a taste with Chutney, and tried to crit Santa Claus, so he’ll be back for more! Give the big guy a Rogue

TL:DR

Ashley - Paladin Laura - Barbarian Liam - Fighter/Ranger, also Changeling Marisha - Sorcerer Sam - Druid or Cleric Talesin - Artificer (Armorer) Travis - Rogue

[yandere-daydreams]

Can you write Diavolo or Lucifer (or both) with a tiny!MC? I mean, MC would be helpless against either of them regardless of their size, but, you know, it would emphasize the power difference a little.

It’s a metaphor, baby! Although, every Darling might be a mini Darling compared to Diavolo, not that Lucifer isn’t a wall of a man on his own. I’d hardly think their Darling would have a chance, against the both of them.

Title: Cruel and Unusual

TW: Shrinking, Unhealthy Relationships, and Implied Captivity. 

~

“How long is this going to last?”

The question was mumbled, spoken under your breath and barely audible, even to the one asking it. You supposed it was fitting. It was hard to make yourself known, like this. It was hard to do anything, like this. When you were barely as tall as your captors’ thumbs, doors were insurmountable obstacles, common housepets turning into dangerous predators and any platform that may have been a fraction of your normal height becoming an inescapable prison. Lucifer’s desk was no different, a cell of scattered pens and stacks of paper that weren’t nearly as comfortable as you imagined they’d be. Right now, your weight was fully supported by the square base of Lucifer’s antique hourglass, its contents having gone still and settled while Lucifer continued to scribble away at whatever grand declaration he was working on. You didn’t care enough to remember the details, despite all the many times he’d explained them. Attachment was an affliction to be feared, in your current relationship.

He glanced towards you but didn’t look away from his work, barely scanning over your much smaller form before he bothered to express his poorly-veiled disinterest. “What was that, love?”

“This curse,” You clarified, quickly remembering all the many, many times he’d corrected your descriptions. “The vex, or spell, whatever. When is it going to wear off? I’ve learned my lesson, I won’t try to…” You trailed off, attempting to remember what you’d done to incur his wrath. It was all you could do to recall when you’d first woken up like this, coming into consciousness in the palm of Diavolo’s hand, his cooing nearly drowning out Lucifer’s explanation. You never asked him to repeat it. The reason usually didn’t matter - when Lucifer deemed you worthy of discipline, you’d be disciplined. At least this method didn’t hurt. “I’ll follow your rules. I just want this to stop.”

At this, he gave you his full attention. His quill was tossed to the side carelessly, his now-free hand reaching out, coaxing you forward with a twitch of his fingertips. Mindlessly, you obeyed, standing rigidly as the back of his index finger rubbed lazily over your cheek. Petting you the same way an idle collector might pet one of his many beloved, fragile treasures. “Another week,” He muttered, bleary eyes taking in your current state. “Maybe two, depending on your behavior.”

Your expression fell. “You don’t even know--”

You were cut off as someone pinched the back of your collar, pulling down with the slightest bit of strength, your spine taking the brunt of the blow as you failed to catch yourself. Lucifer stifled a laugh as you sprawled out on the unforgiving surface, your tailbone beginning to ache and your shoulder blades screaming in protest as you quickly moved to push yourself up, only to find the pad of Diavolo’s thumb pressed against the top of your head, halting your progress and ruffling your hair in the process. It was effortless for him, but that wasn’t anything new. Holding you back had never been a problem for either of your loving partners.

“I don’t see the rush,” He chuckled, speaking more to Lucifer, even if he was still watching you struggle to stand. “It’s cute. You can’t get into trouble, nor can you make trouble for Lucifer and I. And we’ve been taking care of our little doll properly, haven’t we, sweetheart?”

“You could act a little less eager,” Lucifer remarked, a playful smirk pulling at the corners of his lips. “Sending Barbatos out to find an appropriate wardrobe might have made your true colors a little too apparent.”

“I’m a man of status. You can’t expect me not to provide for my loved ones, regardless of what befalls them.” Diavolo pressed a palm to his heart, sliding onto Lucifer’s desk, shoving its native occupants to the side to make room for himself. Abruptly, you were plucked from the wooden tabletop and placed a little too roughly onto his knee, every movement too quick, too thoughtless, too big. It was bad enough to have to scramble for stability on the uneven terrain, but Diavolo made no attempt to improve your situation, his grin only growing wider as he watched you cling to inhospitable silk. “It’s not so bad, (Y/n). You seem to be managing well.”

You didn’t indulge him with reassurance. “I’m still alive, but… two more weeks?” He pursed his lips, reaching down to comfort you with a gesture that would be far more harmful than he intended it to be, and you did the only thing you could, latching on to his fingertip, digging your nails into skin much too thick for you to have an impact. You couldn’t do much damage, but you got Diavolo’s attention, his demeanor shifting to border on annoyed as you refused to let go. You didn’t care. As long as he was listening, you could live with his irritation. “I can't… I’m really stressed out, alright? Its already been so long, and it’s so hard to live like this. I’ll be good, I swear, but I can’t just rely on you. I’m not… I’m not your pet.”

You held your breath, resisting the urge to shut your eyes. This was the part when Lucifer would yell, and Diavolo would smile, and things wouldn’t work out for you. This was the part where you regretted trying to stand up for yourself.

But a second passed, and Lucifer didn’t yell. Diavolo didn’t smile.

Neither of them spoke, and yet, you were still beginning to wish you’d never said anything at all.

Diavolo turned towards Lucifer, and after a moment of quiet tension, Lucifer sighed, nodding before letting his chin fall to his fist. Diavolo didn’t bother with formalities. One moment, you were on your feet, and the next, you were being thrown into something round and clear, the empty base of the hourglass you’d used for support only minutes ago. The small hatch was secured and locked in a matter of seconds, your form thrown against a glass wall as Diavolo set the makeshift timer. Your mind went blank, panic and confusion distancing you from reality, but you weren’t given much time to figure it out. Diavolo was never one for subtleties.

“You’ve got an hour to apologize,” He said, a patronizing drawl clear in his muffled voice. Polite and condescending and awful. You couldn’t have missed it if you tried. “You can be so ungrateful, sometimes… Hopefully, this will give you time to realize how much worse we could be, if we tried to be cruel.”

You opened your mouth, but closed it just as quickly. You couldn’t think of anything to say.

Not when the first grains of sand were already beginning to fall.  

[yandere-wishes]

Yandere Teams //Twisted Wonderland x Reader//

The quality of my writing keeps getting worst and worst 🤣

===========================================================

Malleus + Lilia

Lilia and Malleus are one of the better pairs of yanderes to share a darling. Malleus is so eager to keep his darling locked up, away from everyone, everything. But simultaneously Malleus has a weak spot for Lilia, he looks up to the older fae and desperately wants to gain his approval. He also trusts his judgment, so if Lilia wants to play a little bit "rough" with the darling then Malleus is willing to turn a blind eye. On the other hand, Lilia has a sicker, much more twisted manner of thinking about their situation, the older fae doesn't just see the Darling as his property he also sees Malleus as his now! Yes in Lilia's warped mind both Malleus and the poor darling belong to him and only him. 

Life with the two isn't too bad, it's really all a matter of staying on both their good sides. Don't tick off one and expect the other to side with you. Malleus always takes Lilia's side no matter what, in his eyes, the pink and black-haired fae can do no wrong. On the other hand, Lilia just doesn't care. 'Malleus put you under a sleeping curse?' oh well that just how he is. 'Malleus broke your arm when he mistakenly thought you were attempting to escape?' That's just how things are around here better get used to it. 

Just sit around like a nice pretty doll and let the two powerful fairies do as they want with you and everything will be okay.

Jade + Floyd

It all started when you made the mistake of asking Jade out on a date. One day when you'd swallowed up enough courage you marched up to your senior and all but begged for a date. To your surprise, Jade had agreed, hesitantly but never the less the "yes" was said. Oh, how happy you had been that day. Rushing back to your dorm room to doll yourself up.  Fantasizing about the date as you danced around the room.

But when you actually arrived at the Mostro Lounge somethings off. Jade isn't...well, right. His smile is too big stretching across his cheeks in the most unnatural manner. His eyes have lost their spark, they're dull and dead almost like they're made of silicone. His personality isn't right either, he's too fidgety too hyper. He's all but bouncing off the walls and singing every other word.

When you finally walk over to him, the teal haired teen lounges himself at you, wrapping his arms so tightly around your body that air can't pass through your lungs. It's in that quick-paced breathless moment that you realize your mistake. This isn't Jade, this isn't the sweet charismatic gentleman no..this is his brother Floyd, the one person in NRC that haunts your dreams. The one boy that never goes one day without screaming your name through the hallways and "accidentally" bumping into you.

Try as you might to get out of his grasp and run for the exit, it's all futile. The younger just keeps hugging tighter and tighter until pesky black spots start to float around your sight, the bright lights fade into shimmering orbs as your consciences slowly slips away.

It's later when you wake up that you notice just how grave and hopeless your situation is. The grinning faces of both twins are peering down at you, sharp teeth on full display as they get closer and closer...

These two are the most in sync yanderes you will ever meet. Sure they seem like polar opposites but when it comes to their darling they can agree on practically EVERYTHING.

Now friendly reminder that Floyd is the more aggressive one out of the two. His cold fingers are always trickling over your skin, pinching the flesh as he proclaims how "cute" you are. Jade is the last string of sanity for both you and his brother. He makes sure you are both in line and never go overboard...technically Floyd never goes overboard. Jade is also much more hesitant to hurt their precious darling, he does enjoy how much you need him, but he hates seeing his little "goldfish" (the only fish's name I can write without getting a mini heart attack, yes I hate fish that much XD) in any form of pain. Now both marks are a completely different story, both twins adore marking their darling. Jade prefers to leave "love bites" over your neck and shoulders trailing down to your arms, while Floyd prefers to mark your thighs and torso area.

The twins may not be the most intense yanderes but they aren't very subtle either, just when you're starting to go with the flow they change something to throw you off and send you spiraling down a waterfall of confusion.

Riddle + Chenya Riddle and Chenya are the most contradicting yanderes you'll ever meet. These two can't agree on anything! Riddle usually set rules but Chenya always manages to convince their darling to break them under the pretext that "they won't get punished". Technically he's not telling a complete lie, He won't get punished but you sire will. Riddle is slightly more sympathetic when he's punishing his darling for a broken rule that Chenya convinced them to break. He knows that it's all his childhood friend's fault but he still has to discipline you with the hope that next time you won't listen to that idiot.

Now both these boys are possessive and desperate for any form of affection their beloved will give. Doesn't matter if it's kisses or gentle head pats so long as they can feel their s/o's tender fingers over their flesh. This usually leads to a tug of war between childhood friends. One of them is always trying to strangle your attention away from the other. Wither its Chenya sneaking up behind you and Riddle while you cuddle or Riddle yell and screaming until you and Chenya break apart your kiss and make room for him on the couch.

Overall these two are so chaotic together that sometimes their darling wonders why they even teamed up in the first place...

Leona + Ruggie Leona and Ruggie are actually a very underhanded duo. It's obvious from the start that Leona is pulling the strings. He manipulated Ruggie into helping him, briding the younger boy with the promise of the darling's undying love or food, either one works. It's Ruggie that does the physical kidnapping, it's also Ruggie that has to take care of the darling. Making sure they stay fed, clean, having something to wear after both he and Leona got rather aggressive on some nights. He does all the heavy lifting, while Leona just lays around cuddling the darling before falling asleep.

Leona has multiple ways of keeping both Ruggie and the darling in line. He's always being so considerate, so "caring" constantly showing them in pricey gifts or treating them over the top fancy restaurants. Anything at all no matter how expensive as long as it keeps them compliant.

These two do make a good team, but it's all manipulation and mind games. When the dust settles did either of them really love you? Or was it all a sick game for the two wild beasts? 

Divus + Sam

Now Divus and Sam are a rather...odd mix. They don't work very well as a team at first, they're constantly bickering arguing over the smallest things. What their darling will wear, what she'll eat, etc, etc

It gets so bad at one point that Divus and Sam actually start a custody battle over the poor darling. The other teachers are intrigued, playing along for their own amusement. At some point, Lilia - only wanting to see how disastrous it will be- suggests a trial like they do in the movies and because the teachers in NRC are over-glorified children themselves that's exactly what they do!

The jury is made up of the dorm leaders, all reluctant to be there -with the exception of Kalim and a very confused Malleus- Ashton is Divus' lawyer, a horrible one at that. The man has no idea what's going on and is constantly yelling "OBJECTION"!  At some point, Azul and Riddle take their gym teacher aside to explain the basic principles of a courtroom to him.  He's slightly better after that bringing in students to testify for professor Crewel after he promises them a passing mark in his class that is.

Mozus is surprisingly a great lawyer, he has the perfect "witness", asks all the right questions and is constantly throwing shade at how bad Ashton is at anything that requires a bit of wit.

Crowley is obviously the judge, he's just happy to be there honestly. The poor bird-man's throat is slowly going raw from the number of times he's screamed at Ashton to quite down, at Leona to wake up, at Kalim to sit down, at Vil to stop checking his makeup and at Idia to get off his dame phone! An hour into the "Trial" and he already has his verdict.

That leaves you, the reason this whole catastrophe started. You're seated by the headmaster, dressed up in a glittering white dress, your hair and makeup done as if you were the guest of honor at some banquet. Your hands are threaded with silver handcuffs identical to those used on criminals if anyone with no prior knowledge to these events was to enter they surely would think that you were the criminal on trial here.

Finally Crowley proposes a split. Divus gets the darling from Sunday to Tuesday, while Sam gets her on Thursday until Saturday. With Wednesday being a day in which they both get their beloved. The setup works for a few weeks, almost shy of a whole month but...

It gets too much, neither men can standing being apart from their lover for three whole dame days! It's to vexing, too taxing. So they find another way, actually, it's Sam that turns up one day at Divus' room looking like a kicked puppy and all but begging to see their darling. Feel a tingle of pity Divus lets him in. This ends up becoming a normal thing. Every time Sam has you Divus will show up in his room and visa versa. They get better at sharing, agreeing with one another, one may even say they start to enjoy each other's company as much as their darling's.

[lulafia]

Percy, Vex and how they interact which each other’s insecurities

A thing I find very interesting about Vex and Percy is that they both have such self-worth issues? It manifests just very differently and there is just a level of recognition, a gentleness in how they interact with each other's insecurities and like a lot of quiet moments.

So let’s talk about just that:

I have seen a discussion once, about why, if Percy believed Ripley was far more dangerous than the Briarwoods, he didn't deal with her first? For me it makes sense, because all the names on the List, aside from Ripley’s, did something directly that led to his family being killed. The whole revenge thing in the Whitestone arc was for Percy’s family, it was about what they took from him, yes, but not in a sense that was done to Percy specifically. He is on a revenge trip because of the murder of his family with little to no regard of himself. He even says it in his goodbye letter.

“There was nothing I could’ve done to save my family, yet I still sold my soul in search of vengeance. Later I allowed Ripley to leave, knowing full well she was a greater threat to the world than the Briarwoods would ever be. I traded the world’s safety for the belief that I could murder my way to peace; that if I could be a greater horror, it would bring my family back.”

In that sense it makes sense that Ripley is on the bottom of Percy’s list. It’s implied that she hasn’t had  much to do with the actual killings, at least to Percy’s knowledge. For all we know she has tortured Percy for information and for Percy that’s not important, because she only did this to him as far as he knows. Because Percy doesn’t regard his life as much, he is always ready to just throw it out for the people he cares about. He continues to do it, when he signs the contract, when Vax insists that Percy does it rather than Tary. He sees this fit, doesn’t question it and just does it. Even at the end he would give his life up for Vex to get Vax back. There is Whitestone and legacy and family, which are very important for Percy, but Percy also writes about himself: “As to what must be done, I’d be content to be left in a ditch, my weapons and notes burnt and broken.” And Vex just brings out the best diamond she has when they do the ritual, because he is worth so much more to her and even if he doesn't know it just matters to her to show it. Percy gets the best diamond even if he thinks of himself as not deserving of that. 

When Vex says to him in episode 67 “You are a better man than you believe.” Percy says “Thank you. I accept that compliment. You as well, you are a better woman than you believe. Doesn’t feel good, does it? There you are.” Vex tells him: “No, it doesn’t. Shit.” I really like this moment between them, because there is a recognition, they exchange this smug and knowing look and they just understand? Like they know that the other one genuinely means it, but they cannot acknowledge that part for themselves. It doesn’t feel right for them and they have just such a quiet moment about it? And Percy just keeps reassuring Vex, like when he writes in his goodbye letter, there is just something about the way he writes: "Vex, you often remind me of myself and that is the highest of compliments.” 

About how he can see himself in a positive way when he can compare himself to her, because she is amazing. And he loves her so much. He also likes to tell her again how smart she is. 

They do it all the time, they tell the other what they are for them and how they see them and how much they value their relationship, but they rarely ever push it and demand that the other sees it too. Just a reassurance that maybe they can see it too someday, no pressure. Just telling them that they are worthy of love, affection and redemption. It's okay if they can't see it or believe it, yet. They are going to be there and tell them in all honesty what they are worth it, they just have each other's back. For example in episode 92, Percy says "You know, it's entirely possible that there'll be several creatures fighting over my body when I die, and my soul when I die, already." Vex just tells him "I'll be one of them." Without any hesitation. There is never any doubt in Vex's mind that he is not worth it or whatever Percy has himself convinced. She just says it, she will fight for him, no room for objection. An obviousness in the way she says it. It seems so small, but it's just a big thing!

And there is Vex, who just grew up with a shit father in a society that looked down at what she was. That met her with coldness and judgment and the feeling that she will never be good enough, despite how hard she tries they just wouldn't accept her. In their eyes she was always less and it hit her hard, it hit her so differently than Vax. (that is like a whole other discussion for another day, the differences in Vex and Vax and how they interact with each other and others) but Vex hides it well, because there is a part that thinks that they were right and that she doesn't deserve love and affection. She downplays her own feelings and how hurt she often is so much and she really doesn't want to bother other people.

So then in Syngorn when Vex is worked up about all the bad feelings and trauma that is connected to that place, and because Vex does stuff, she tries to polish her armour, when Percy comes in and they have the exchange and I know you all know it too

Vex: “Well, you come from money right?”

Percy: “Yes.”

Vex: ”Right, so do I look like I come from money?”

Percy: (laughs) “Honestly, dear, you're too happy to look like you come from money.”

Vex: (laughs) “I don't believe that.”

Percy: “No, it's a sure sign of it, is an abject misery, believe me. I can speak to it. You look too much like you, and you don't look enough like something you're supposed to be. If you feel the urge to deeply bullshit, I'd be happy to help you. It's not hard.”

Vex: ”No?”

Percy: “No. It is easy to pretend you come from money. You just have to be a bit of a shit and wear what everybody else is wearing. Does this have something to do with that city? It does, doesn't it. Who's there?” 

Vex: “Well, you know. Everyone. We were judged, growing up, and I don't look forward to seeing that again.”

Percy: (sighs) “Well.”

Vex: “It's not important.”

Percy: “Oh, I disagree. Dear, I think that if you're worried about them knowing whether or not you've made your money and made your fortune-- I don't think that's going to be the thing to earn their respect. I think you're better off, A, with the company that you keep, and B, with the fact that you're probably just better than most of them.”

Vex: (laughs)

Percy:”I've known a lot of people with money, and they are definitely not worth you. And besides, if they have something nice that makes you feel inferior, we can just take it.”

Vex: (laughs) “I like the way you think.”

Percy: “Well, and then they're just shit without anything, and then you're you with their stuff.”

It's one of the rare moments that Vex shows how hurt she is and allows someone else to have a glimpse of her insecurities. Vex doesn't think she is worth it, because growing up she was made to feel, constantly, that she is less than the shitty elves that treated her so badly. 

Like there is so much to talk about in this scene but for the sake of keeping it somewhat short, let's talk mainly about the bit at the end. 

Percy reassures Vex and doesn't dismiss how she wants to cope and reacts to the whole situation in telling her that he will happily go with whatever she plans. He also recognises that this isn't just about looking like you made it. He offers his view on her and tells her how much he values her judgment and her as a person. When he then says "… with the fact that you're probably just better than most of them." Vex's reaction is just to laugh and like deflect, because she herself doesn't believe it and Percy in the moment of realisation, what she does, emphasizes on his views of her and just shares how highly he thinks of her and cuts right to her insecurities. 

“I’ve known a lot of people with money, and they are definitely not worth you. And besides, if they have something nice that makes you feel inferior, we can just take it.” 

Just all of the first line. He then gives her a gentle out, when he offers that they can just take their stuff. Not a second later he emphasizes it again, when he says, the mood a bit more light “Well, and then they’re just shit without anything, and then you’re you with their stuff.” 

He values her so much and he wants her to know and hell, he wants everyone to know, how great she is and that's the thing he does, right? When he gives her the title in public, a token of affection, a love letter to how high he thinks of her and he gives her in that also a home, if she wants. Percy knows how she is, so he gives her something she has to earn and something that fits and he just gives her that, something to be a part of what means so much too him, because she means so much to him and he just gives her that, so there no doubt in the worth he sees in her. He would give her all, if it means that maybe it will help her see herself how he sees her. And there is just so much recognition and unshakeable love, affection, care and gentleness in general but also how they approach the other with their own trauma and issues and everything. And when Vex said at the end of episode 115 "You're a good person and you're not broken anymore. All right? We'll fill each other's gaps. We'll be the glue.” There is just this mutual understanding and love.

[juminly]

As The Rush Comes (Ikémen Vampire Theodorus Van Gogh x Reader)

Summary: You are at a nightclub with your friend Theodorus Van Gogh. The problem is, you want to be more than friends. Does he feel the same? Hell yes. Change is bound to happen. And it does. This one-shot was inspired by the song As the Rush Comes.   Read all 3 parts on AO3. Rating: Mature (explicit/coarse language, detailed mention of sexual acts) 

Tags: Modern AU, mutual pining, sexual tension/frustration, jealousy, dirty dancing. 

Warning: mention of the reader not remembering the events of a past night of heavy drinking and partying.  Word Count: 3500 approx. 

Club Music Playlist *Kiss you by Nadia Ali **Down to Love (Kyau & Albert Remix) by Armin Van Buuren feat. Ana Criado

***Still I Wait (Richard Durand’s In Search of Sunrise Remix) by Jonas Steur feat. Jennifer Rene. 

Song lyrics are in bold; look at this asterisks to know which song is playing in the background and play the song as you read -------------------------- *I'd wake up, and make love to you if I had you, I would touch you so much, but I'm not allowed to… Nadia Ali, bless her heart, was only adding salt to your wounds. You were already feeling salty enough for feeling the way you did and she didn’t make it any better. Why were you salty? While the song went on and on about how the vocalist just needed to wait for the perfect moment to kiss the one she wanted to show love to, you were here lamenting pathetically over Theodorus Van Gogh, the man that occupied your every waking thought and dream… and most recent fantasies.

The music was thrumming loudly in your ears, the discographies selected by this particular local DJ was always to your liking. The rhythmic beat of trance sending the club-goers into an ephemeral state of rapture as the dancefloor flocked with writhing bodies, the scent of alcohol, sweat and sex heady in the air. Were people living in some sort of state of drought? The thirst was real… and so palpable. You were not one to judge, you felt it too.

Thud… Thud… Thud… Was that the music or your pulse? You couldn’t tell anymore.

Would you pretend, we're only friends, if I kissed you, At least I can dream of you in a scene, when I'd kiss you.

You’ve dreamed of so many scenes, in so many different locations and in all of them, you were in the most compromising situations and positions. Holy fuck, just thinking about how those icy blue eyes staring into you while he lazily ran his tongue over his swollen lips, the ones you wanted to kiss and bite so damn much, that chiseled body of his positioned between your… No.. No… You told yourself you wouldn’t go there but your mind couldn’t help but wander.  The song had just been coaxing you to act on your impulses and you covered your ears, just to keep Nadia from tempting you more than you already were.

How many months has it been since the incident?

The office hottie, Arthur Conan Doyle, had thrown an extravagant birthday bash in his so-called crib, and to your own surprise, the man had exquisite taste and the entire thing was planned immaculately. Who had been his wingman during the entire process? The hot mister that was your companion at the club for the night. That was how, when and where you met him, much to your dismay.

You heard that things had gotten hot and heavy between you during that birthday party and you were literally flung over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and carried into Arthur’s bedroom. Things had gotten that heated… However, big emphasis on the word “heard” cause you unfortunately don’t remember jackshit from that fateful night and cursed yourself all the time for this.

His hands roughly groping you and his lips fiercely crashing down on yours… The things that could’ve happened… The things you could’ve done… You could ONLY imagine. Imagine, yes. Remember, no. The heavens indisputably had some mocking plot to make you miserable. Miserable? You definitely were. After that night, you were thrown into the friendzone. With a capital F.

Pining after a man that wouldn’t lay a finger on you unless it was to ruffle your hair like some puppy. You almost got your chance at some type of romance in your uneventful life… Still, things only got interesting when that asshole suddenly showed up, but it wasn’t like you were actually willing to admit that to him. You’d rather swallow his… Brain and heart, focus. Libido and hormones, get the fuck away. He wants me… He wants me not… I want everything he’s got.

Shut it, Nadia. You were already drowning in heaps of doubt and you’ve clearly… clearly had enough of her feeding you more fantasies and unlawful and excessively unadulterated thoughts and you were doubting yourself already. And what you decided to do? Drink yourself into oblivion, accompanied by the vexing perpetrator who had just gotten back from the men’s room. It was admiration and pining time for you. As he slowly approached you with long and sure strides, Theodorus was, is and will always be probably the most gorgeous, handsome piece of eye-candy that you’ve ever laid your eyes on and you were 99.99% sure that this statement was your true and unbiased opinion.

Beige dress pants hugged the length of those legs that carried him, giving you the chance to drool over the definition of his stature that you could see thanks to the tightness of the fabric, emphasizing a bit too much for your liking on his… No, don’t go there. Heat flooded your reddened cheeks as your thoughts scrambled wildly in your mind as he found his seat next to you. That’s always where you found yourselves. Together. Always. You get along so well. It’s bound to be this way, right? The string of fate and the butterflies of time managed to find a way to bring you together. While your internal ruminations besieged your mind, a rich baritone touched your ears, unmistakably his. “We probably should leave soon. I don’t want to suffocate in this clothed orgy.” You shot him an inquisitive look, silently asking him to elaborate on his point. “You look like you’re about to melt in that pretty little dress of yours, Hondje. I’d rather hop to any pub or have a drink at that klootzak’s place and deal with his moaning than this. At least his place isn’t as filthy as this hellish kennel.”

“You talk like an old man, Theo. Why don’t we just try to live a little?” He simply gave you a glare, a response that you knew very well. He wasn’t going to waste his breath on such mundane frivolities. It seemed that you would have to take the drinking party elsewhere. Clubs were clearly not Theo’s favourite destination.

You couldn’t help but giggle at this man’s dog analogies. As much as they pissed the shit out of you… Wait. Rewind. Did he just compliment what you were wearing...? He noticed?

For the first time in a while, you decided to try “letting loose” and go for something different. You would usually go for something, more like, anything black but today was different. In celebration of whatever weird feeling and eccentricity that came over you, you decided to go for a skimpy off-the-shoulder purple dress that kissed every curve of your luscious form, barely reaching the top of your mid-thigh and pushed your bosom in a way that accentuated your cleavage. You felt hot and you wanted to feel hot too.

**It's down to love tonight, This is where we are, As we turn into the light, Let’s make it last...

On any other day, Down to Love would’ve been one of your favourite songs to listen to but definitely not today. You were clearly not down to any kind of love. This is not where you wanted to be and you didn’t want this to last. You growled under your breath, enough to have Theodorus, the man of the hour… no, he was the man of your every-fucking-day and your every-goddamn-dream and fantasy, tilt his head to the side to cast a judging gaze at you, raising an arched eyebrow with a silent what-the-fuck is wrong with you.

There was so much that was wrong with you and he was the cause of it all. The prime suspect. The only one, this maddeningly handsome asshole.

Lips slick with moisture, your eyes lingered a little too long on the inviting gleam before you attempted to relax in your seat, while Theo remained hunched apathetically over the bar counter, nursing his drink thoughtlessly. Both of you were so accustomed to whatever it was that you were doing, you fell into a pattern that soon began to feel more like a ritual. You couldn’t even remember how you became his drinking buddy but there was something that Arthur said once… Both of you were not the type to party hard so it made it hard for him to have fun with the both of you, even though Theo and him spent an obscene amount of time together. You were kindred spirits. That was a fact.

Being around him made it hard to breathe. You noticed that not only the first button of his shirt was open, but now, the second one was too, giving you a good look of impeccably sculpted pectorals, his skin shining under the epilepsy-inducing lights of the nightclub while drops of sweats meandered down to places unknown, unexplored… and desired. With one arm propped on the counter and leaning his full weight to one side, his form was completely angled towards you and his eyes roamed appraisingly over your provocative dress and your overall physique. You knew that look, you’ve seen it before. It was the same way he scrutinized and examined art.

His gaze was now posed on your thighs, your dress hiked up even more on your silky skin as you crossed and uncrossed your legs restlessly. “Looking at something, big guy? My eyes are up here. You’ve been checking me out since we got here.” you quipped with a smirk. “Hm?” he hummed, as if you had ripped him away from the depth of his thoughts. You could see a faint blush on the top of his cheekbones… It was clearly only a sign of inebriation. Right? “Oh, I was just wondering who you’re trying to seduce.” he replied blankly before continuing. “You wouldn’t need to dress up like this to impress me.” His tongue swiped over his lower lip, wettening it before throwing his head back, draining his glass of whiskey and turning his body away, leaving you perplexed by his words.  What… What exactly did he mean by that? Shaking your thoughts away, you had enough wine in your system to finally get the words spilling from your lips. “Theo… Wanna dance?” Those three words prickled his ear drums and he turned to look at you with a judging smirk. “Is it playtime, Hondje?” You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms at his expected remark, climbing off your bar stool and tapping your heeled foot on the black tile beneath you. Looking at him expectantly, your heart clenched, momentarily regretting your decision to build up the courage to take the first step. He was bound to embarass you somehow.

“I’m sure you can find lots of other pups and mutts to play with in that disgusting pile of bodies.” An affronted expression washed over his handsome face and you resisted the need to slap his smugness away. You began to tremble slightly and snapped at him “You suck, Theo!”. His reaction made you freeze for a second. His eyes were taking you in, gliding over your body from head to toe before locking with yours. “Would you like to take me for a test drive? Are you in heat, Hondje?” he practically purred.

“Fuck you, Theo.” Was he capable of doing anything but frustrate (and arouse) you? You could feel an intense heat building inside of you, your heart beating angrily in your chest as you seethed from his response. You blinked, completely outraged and offended as he dared to freaking chuckle at your contained outburst.

“You wish. Now, can you go bark at someone else and let me enjoy my bloody drink?” Not wanting to give him more of your precious time, you actually flipped him the bird this time, scowling at him in disbelief, all that wine in your blood giving way for your tongue to sharpen as the night went on. “Do you always have to be such an ass?”

The ear-splitting grin on Theo’s face suddenly transformed into a smirk… and a scowl? when a young man behind you asked you to dance. You couldn’t really register what the guy was saying. Something along the lines of “ I don’t know if he’s just stupid or blind” and honestly, you kind of agreed with him. As much as Theodorus Van Gogh was a genius at what he did, he was stupid for not giving in to you. You were ready to give him… your everything. You were in deep shit, being so in love with a man who would possibly not return your affections? He looked like the incarnation of heartbreak and didn’t that just make you giddy? Being around him almost made you… sarchotic.

Sarchotic or not. Now you had his full attention.

Those ocean blue eyes were trained on you, an unfamiliar predatorial aura reverberating from him, still seeping through Theodorus’ attempt to enshroud it with the negligible quirk of those lips, that half-smile that you knew too well. If he wanted a show, he’s gonna be getting one. Not that you really cared whether he enjoyed it or not, but the least you could do is actually enjoy the company of the… You looked at your newly appointed dance partner, who had just lead you to the dancefloor, to evaluate him.

Okay, he wasn’t too bad: a bit shorter and less muscular than Theo but his hair were waves of chocolate brown that were simply asking to be threaded through and pulled. You beamed at your partner, feeling a rush of adrenaline course through your blood, knowing that the handsome Dutch man had his eyes on you and you were going to put a damn show. Wait, it wasn’t a show. You were doing this for you. You didn’t give a fuck and just wanted to have some fun. Looking at the cutie in front of you, you raised your arms in the air and jumped to the beat of the music, body-rolling as you let the sinful rhythm of your racing thoughts lead your every movement. ***I wanted it, I needed it, I love the way your skin felt upon my skin, And I thought you felt the same but you threw me away, Threw me away and still

The man in front of you was definitely getting into the groove, slowly inching close to you and you were more than ready to welcome him. Your hands that were in the air were now resting on his shoulders, your fingers finding the inviting chocolate strands of his hair. His hands were on both sides of your hips, claiming control over the frantic sway of your hips, matching the booming tempo that filled the room. You licked your lips and bit them, feeling your heart race as you snuck a quick look at the bar counter, the expression on Theodorus’ face was absolutely feral… and bloodthirsty.

Good thing you had bitten your lips because you were about to let out an obscene moan as he looked like he was ready to slam you into a wall and fuck you senseless, growling in your ear: You’re already so wet for me, Hondje, so ready for me to slide inside you…. You’ve been teasing me all damn night and when I stuff you with my cock, make you mine… You’ll be screaming my name. A looming presence was suddenly behind you, a hand gripping your hip and forcefully pulling you away from the “cutie”. You had absolutely no idea what happened, when it happened and how it happened. You could’ve sworn that you heard something along the lines of “She’s mine” but it was most probably your brain playing tricks on you. Or not.

“Are you trying to play games with me, Knabbeltje?” His heavy hand on your hip clenched tightly, his fingertips digging in your soft flesh while you drank in the rumble of his voice in your ear, velvety smooth yet deep enough to shake you to the bone, capable of making your knees buckle in weakness. You fought the temptation to rub your legs together and continued the lascivious sway of your hips from side to side in a rhythm that was your own and one that Theodorus would come to learn. Cutie, who? Theodorus was the only person you knew. All your senses acutely aware of him and he made sure of that. Only a breath of air seperated your bodies yet, he was so close but still felt so far before he yanked your back brusquely, your back hitting the vast plain of his chest and the softness of your derriere grazing his crotch. You closed your eyes and hummed with a nonchalant tone, your back arching as you reached your arms behind you, gripping Theo by his nape and threading your digits leisurely through his chestnut locks.

“You really want to know, hm?” You crooned and he tensed briefly but soon relaxed behind you, one hand caressing the curve of your hips, his hold on you was firm and steady, making you feel the heat radiating from his body and enveloping you with the scent of his cologne mixed with whiskey, intoxicating you even more than the wine you drank.

One of his large hands snakes up the curve of your waist, lightly grazing the side of your soft mound and trailing up your neck and resting there. He rolled his hips against yours, your body following his every moment as he dictated your every single motion. The warmth of his breath tickled your ear as he crooned sultrily in your ear. “I could eat you all up, Knabbeltje… right fucking now.” I don't wanna feel rejection, don't wanna have no regrets… Is this a good decision or will you look for someone else? Leave me all by myself...

“Is that so?” you could hear your own smile in your voice and could hear an inherent raspiness in it too. Your thoughts swiveled with yearning and your judgement was clouded by your love for this man… and your inebriation. Your mutual ministrations continued as he grinded his hips at an excruciating pace, drawing out the torture that you were both suffering from. His long fingers were now teasing the column of your neck, careening over your sensitive skin and sending shivers up and down your spine. Slowly, he wrapped his hand on your neck, pressing only lightly and bit the tip of your earlobe before sucking on it, letting his tongue glide over its seams. “I wouldn’t say it if it weren’t true. You want me to repeat myself?”

“I didn’t say any such thing, Theodorus.” You dared to use his full name, intentionally triggering him. His grip tightened on your neck and warm breath caressing your ear. “I’m not all bark like you.” He truly thought that you were all bark but you were prepared and intended to do lots of biting, now that he was so near. You tightened your grip on his strands, making him groan in response. “I hate that you make me feel this way.” you breathed out slowly, trying to ignore the tightening of anticipation rousing in your chest. “Enlighten me… What kind of way do I make you feel, hm?” It was now his turn to tease you. “You know how I feel about you…” you pouted, grudgingly taking a sharp inhale before you carried on with this morphed, semblance of a confession. “You keep… you keep messing with my head, Theo.”

“You’re doing much worse to me, mijn liefste.” Oh God, you didn’t know what he said but you were positive that it was not some dog related insult and your heart drummed even harder in your chest. Why did this man have so much control over you? His voice was like whiskey and chocolate, dark, decadent and  heavy with yearning, a blazing fire in your core, an excited tremor coursed through your veins like lightning, but not once did you rush the wicked to and fro of your hips, brushing your softness against the harsh ropes of sinew that made him the Adonis that he was.

Your cheeks were rosy as the pink dusk that painted clear skies and he saw that as you twisted your chest to look back and up at him. His fierce stare reflected in your glimmering eyes, your pupils dilating clearly, making them appear almost darkened in their shade. It would be blasphemous to say that Theodorus was anything but completely mesmerizing. “Don’t give me those eyes, Knabbeltje... or I promise I’ll take you here and now.”

I love to see you smile, I love, my love… As much as the thought had you reeling, you wanted the awaited spectacle to be a private one. Gazing straight in his almost glowing orbs of sapphire, he had the look of a man who was born ready to ravage you and rearrange your insides. Leaning down, he drawled against your lips with a huskiness that sent you into a frazzled state of need.

“When I fuck you, I’m going to make sure you always remember it. The only thing that’s gonna spill from those pretty lips is my name.”

------------ Read Part II  HERE.  Tagging le Theo simp squad + those who have been so kind to send me their ideas on what the “dirty dancing scenario” should be like: @delicateikemenmemes @sweetlittlemouse @nad-zeta @nafeary @raymiazaki @munarisblog @karmaaf​ (sorry if I forgot anyone else)  Hope you enjoyed this 💜 Please feel free to leave comments/feedback! Masterlist

[freddiekluger]

it's a new year but i haven't changed, and evidently you haven't either- thank god for that!

before we get started: here's the link to the post/s referred to where i explored what a future cap-coming-out could look like

an indeterminate amount of time has passed, and the captain's starting to feel antsy. in the moments immediately after alison decided he was gay, the captain felt pretty sure he'd managed to convince the ghosts otherwise but now he's not so sure. thomas keeps trying to relate to him about love, which has never happened before, and julian won't stop casually mentioning how "section 28 had NOTHING to do with me. actually i think you'll find i had a bit of the old 'clap' at the time, and so wasn't able to make it to all the usual meetings. it's funny you should mention meetings actually—" the captain hasn't got an inkling of what institution this 28th sector belongs to, but the various changes in the button house environment are setting him on edge.

well, the changes in environment and the fact that he's a homosexual.

to be totally honest, he hasn't got even faintest idea what he's supposed to do next. when one finds out such information about oneself, it tends to be a Delicate Matter and the captain never liked Delicate Matters. give him a frontal assault against jerry any day of the week. but alas, 'tendencies' and 'feelings' don't respond to tactical planning, and so the captain finds himself talking to robin of all people. something about his stripped back language or the way way he barks at the postie is equal parts vexing and disarming, and so when robin wanders over to the captain, who's instinctually scanning the horizon for enemy insurgents, cap asks robin if anything seems 'off' to him.

"i millions of years old and chess genius, you dead and looking for army. this whole thing is 'off'."

"i suppose you do have a point."

the captain takes a few breaths before starting up again.

"i say, robin, if you were to have recently discovered a vital piece of information concerning your own person... something you hadn't known before that changes everything— hypothetically speaking, of course— what do you presume you would do?"

"something that changes everything?"

the captain clears his throat and nods.

"i would take nap."

cap rolls his eyes at this, and prepared to walk away. what was he thinking, asking a caveman for advice!

"i would take nap, then after nap, i talk it out. important to get things out in the—" robin starts gesticulating wildly, moving his hands together and then apart again, like the pages of a book, or maybe a gate??

the captain makes a few far too specific guesses (grappling hook, semaphore), before realising robin means 'open', which is a relief to them both. robin continues.

"good to get things out in the Open. talk with friends. make head less full."

if anything, your head's not full enough, the captain thinks, but robin's words do lodge in his mind. they become particularly noisy at night, when a loneliness he can't quite put his finger on settles in, and he hasn't quite been able to shake that urge to run that erupted in him the minute alison uttered the word 'gay'. perhaps a frontal assault of sorts is not entirely out of the question.

the next day during food club (kitty was about to share the foods cook used to bring her when she was forced to stay in her room while her sister entertained guests), the captain stands to face the rest of the ghosts. his unbeating heart still manages to feel like it wants to leap out of his chest, but he steels himself. being a soldier means facing things head on, and he'll be damned if he doesn't continue to do so. (does being a ghost count as damnation? he figures that's a problem for a different day)

"I have something I'd like to tell, er, share, with you all."

the captain makes eye contact with robin on 'share'. meanwhile pat, pretty sure where this is going, attempts to subtly signal an approaching alison to stop— the captain is doing his best not to look like a deer in headlights, but pat isn't sure that a single interruption won't scare cap off for another decade.

"as you may have guessed, i've had a lot on lately."

the captain clears his throat again, rocking on his heels.

"that is to say, i've recently been made aware that even an old captain like myself should— should be open with his troops, er companions."

pat chimes in- "i think you mean friends, cap." the captain just makes a captain-y noise, fiddling with his swagger stick. what he wouldn't give for a tank to come barging through button house right at this second.

"there's no easy way for me to say this, so i suppose i ought to come right out with it. that's what i'll do. i'll just tell you. i'm about to do it. any second now."

the ghosts sit in silence. julian can't help but wonder how many of kitty's foods they could have gotten through by now.

"i'm gay," the captain blurts out abruptly. well, i suppose that's one way of doing it. The captain stammers and flounders a bit before continuing. "I like men, as alison so 'eloquently' said, no further questions, that'll be all thank you very much. ahem."

the captain did envision this going a bit more smoothly, but then again the brits thought Gallipoli would be a piece of cake, and look how that ended up. pat's voice is the first to break the silence as the captain walk-runs back to his seat.

"that must have been really difficult for you, cap, and we all really appreciate you telling us, don't we guys?" the ghosts murmur assent. "guys?" the ghosts give more enthusiastic murmurs of assent, as the captain shifts his gaze from his shoes to us found/forced family. before he can properly respond, kitty throws her arms around him and starts talking a mile a minute about how excited she is for him, and before he knows it thomas is outpouring his poetic admiration for the love between men ('especially in a time such as your own'), humphrey is attempting to deliver a 'good job' from a nearby coffee table, mary is wishing him many blessings and 'appiness, robin is wearing an 'i told you so' look on his face, fanny is sporting a surprisingly tender smile. pat initiates a big group hug, and even a reluctant julian joins in.

the captain has never gone in for hugs, but much like Delicate Matters and robin's sharing approach, he's starting to see a place for them. alison just watched and smiles. the captain is seeing a place for himself too.