#london by mokita | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

planetkiimchi · 2 years ago

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london

no 2. of my song collection

summary — felicks always wanted to visit london. so he promised his precious sister, aurelia, that he would take her there one day. unfortunately, felicks passed away before he could take relie to london, so she went there herself to fulfill his wish.

warnings — getting drunk, cancer, death, a lot of cursing.

“Licks?” The question was soft-spoken and hung in the clean, sterile air. It was tentative, almost like no answer was expected, and accompanied by a girl with straight black hair pulled back into a high ponytail.

She looked perfectly healthy, and was dressed like she was going somewhere important. She held herself proudly, body upright and sharp features giving the impression of someone who was not to be interrupted.

However, her voice was gentle and soothing, and would have caused heads to turn if she were in a different setting. Perhaps in an office, it would have raised eyebrows.

In the hospital unit, it was a different story. Everyone had their own worries and business to mind, and a well-dressed woman with a kind voice was nothing out of the ordinary. In fact, to those who were unable to get up from their beds to see her, she may have simply sounded like one of the nurses they were used to.

The man named Felicks sat up in his bed and smiled weakly. “Relie?”

Aurelia’s face lit up and she hugged her brother tightly while he looked down at her and laughed. She was still childlike whenever she saw him, and no matter how professional she was at work, whenever Felicks was around, Relie was her brother’s younger sister, first and foremost.

“Licks! You can’t fall ill, okay? You’ve got to hang on for me.”

“I don’t think that’s how cancer works, Rel,” Felicks said wryly, gazing wistfully at her as she walked over to the chair and wheeled it to Felicks’ bedside.

“Yes, it is.” Relie’s stubbornness made Felicks chuckle. Her emphasis on her words showed exactly how she felt about her brother being sick—she might have been scared for him, but she didn’t want to let it show.

“Look, just to prove you wrong, we should make a list of places you want to go, and then we’ll visit them when you’re better. And then you’ll remember, ‘Oh, Relie was right all along!’” Relie pulled out her phone and opened up the ‘Notes’ app so Felicks could see it.

“Places to visit in London,” she said aloud for his benefit as she typed in the title.

Felicks cocked his head in confusion. “Why London, specifically?”

Relie gave him an odd look. “Are you seriously asking me that question? You’ve always wanted to go to London. It’s been our dream city for years!”

She looked as if she were seeing someone else, as if Felicks had been replaced with an imposter, some stranger who didn’t know anything about their childhoods.

“Kidding, kidding. ‘Course I know why you picked London.”

Leaning over to see, Felicks jabbed at the screen and narrated, “Tourist shops around Camden town, taking a trip on the Tube, see the royal gardens, and get hella drunk. That’s my bucket list for London. I also plan to bring back flowers that we stole from a royal garden and give it to you. Y’know, as a gift.”

This was all said in one breath, and Felicks was breathing hard afterwards from the exertion. Relie was furiously typing in order to catch up to Felicks’ extensive list, and kept judging Felicks’ specific requests.

“It’s probably, like, a crime or something to steal from the royal gardens. We might get arrested,” Relie said matter-of-factly.

“Well, add that to the list then! Get arrested—or run away from the cops. Your choice.”

Relie shook her head and sighed. Usually, this was the point that she would look at her parents and shrug, as if to say, “You see the bullshit I have to put up with?” But neither of her parents had been free that afternoon, so they had visited Felicks in the morning while Relie was at work.

Nevertheless, she put it down on the list, and read out the five items for Felicks to hear. He nodded in satisfaction and laid back on the bed, settling in and shutting his eyes.

“I’ve got to sleep now, so…”

“Are you kicking me out?” Relie sounded both offended and defensive at the same time, which was, strangely enough, a combination of tones Felicks was used to hearing from his younger sister.

“Yup. See you tomorrow.” With a harrumph and a dramatic turn of her head that involved hitting her own face with her ponytail, Relie left the hospital ward in a huff, and Felicks watched her back as she walked out.

She did not, in fact, see Felicks the next day. Felicks Carter passed away that night at 1.27am on September the 3rd, from succumbing to stage four cancer. At least that was what Relie was told.

She knew deep in her heart that the truth was, Felicks was happy that day. He’d said his goodbyes. Even if he was strong enough physically to pull through, mentally he was too tired and too satisfied to want to continue fighting.

So on the fifth of September, Relie and her parents found themselves burying Felicks Carter, beloved son and older brother, as written on his headstone.

That early morning, the sky burned bright like ochre, burnt umber streaks like autumn. It was in stark contrast to the dull grey of the still-smooth headstone which bore the tragic date of Felicks’ death. His life looked so short compared to Relie’s grandparents, who had all lived to eighty or more. Felicks had died when he was only twenty three, a mere third of the life he might have lived.

Relie’s heart broke at the colour of the sky, for she did not deserve the beauty that brightened her day. She deserved to mourn and not to be merry, to cry and to weep, to let her tears streak her face as she bows her head, haunted by memories.

The cloth on her back was soft, like cotton, and she hated it. It should be stiff, like a suit that has had too much starch added to it, or scratchy, like a cheap shirt bought at a dollar sale. Yet it gives her comfort she is not worthy of. She was at a funeral where all happiness was drained; she should not be comfortable at all.

The word "wake" was such an unsuitable name for it. Felicks fell asleep, not awake, lost in a land where all ideals of paradise come true. He did not wake, he passed, spirits lifted to the heavens as his sins were hopefully forgiven.

How dare the world mock her while she mourned, silent tears slipping down her face despite how hard she tried to keep it in. The entire funeral was a blur to her, and she moved through the motions mindlessly like a robot. The wake became something she only held on to in documents and morbid thoughts.

Immediately after the Felicks’ death, Relie began preparing for a trip to London. Relie’s parents played it off as an impulse she felt the need to act on out of grief, and assisted in her planning. Her father offered to pay for it, and her mother asked if she wanted them to come.

Relie was torn between the need for space and the need for comfort, but eventually she decided that she wanted to be alone, and thanked both her parents.

The planning took several weeks, and by the time the flight and the hotel had been booked, it was three months past the date since Relie last saw Felicks alive.

The morning before her flight, she visited the graveyard and laid her head on the headstone, closing her eyes.

Smiling softly, she spoke. “Licks? It’s Relie. I hope you're happy up there, you traitor. Left us just cause you didn’t want to be bored on the hospital bed, I bet.”

Relie shook her head in exasperation. “Anyhow, because you couldn’t hold on long enough to visit London, I, your favourite sister, am going on behalf of you, to get hella drunk and hopefully not arrested.”

With that, she nodded her head to assure herself that Felicks was happy, and pressed a kiss to the headstone. She set the flower bouquet down and stood up.

“Sorry I couldn’t give you flowers from the royal gardens. If I succeed, I'll bring them back for you.”

Relie had to keep reminding herself not too look back as she left, tears already flowing down again.

The flight was quiet, lacking the familiar banter with Felicks, who always felt the need to disagree with Relie’s movie choices on the plane. For old times’ sake, Relie put on the movie “Little Women”, which Felicks had grown tired of from watching it too often.

She reclined the seat and shut her eyes, imagining Felicks’ voice complaining about the droning monotony of rewatching movies, especially how Jo shouldn’t have wanted to go back to Laurie and how that was bad character writing, since Jo March was an independent woman who a. needed no man and b. would never dare to outwardly admit that she made a rash decision.

He was right, of course, but Relie felt an instinctive pull to defend the movie, which was one of her favourites, and she always felt like an old philosopher explaining her thoughts to Felicks. (Not that it changed any of their opinions, but it just became a habit.)

She fell asleep after the movie ended, which would never have happened if Felicks was there to be a constant nuisance for her to tease, and keep them both awake from the adrenaline rush.

It felt like a fever dream when she stepped off the plane and walked through the airport in a daze, unable to believe that she was really, truly in London, England. It was a city she’d always longed to go to, heavily influenced by Felicks’ outspoken love for England.

Even the rain couldn’t dampen her spirits as Relie courageously chose to take the Underground to get to her hotel. It was late evening and it was pouring outside, but she was eager to tick at least one item off of Felicks’ list.

Everyone on the train was wearing long coats that reached to their ankles, and Relie was suddenly glad she had decided to wear a trench coat, because it was pretty cold, and she wasn’t in the mood to get splashed by water drops.

The black umbrella she had chosen gave her little problems, but it did set a somber mood for Relie’s arrival in London. She supposed it was apt, but all the same, she should have probably chosen something more colourful, so she didn’t look so drab and unhappy.

She slept fitfully, eagerly waiting for the morning to come.

Those tourists shops around Camden town. The first thing on Relie’s bucket list, excluding the late night ride she had taken on the underground, was to visit a tourist shop around Camden town.

This proved to be quite a feat, for she had to first locate Camden town and then find a way to get there from her hotel. Luckily for her, Camden was nearby, and it wasn’t difficult to flag a cab and take a ride to Camden.

Tourist shops lined the streets, many visitors to London walking along as they chatted happily with their companions. Not for the first time, Relie felt a twang in her heart at how lonely it was to be going on a vacation all on her own.

Speeding up, she strode towards one specific shop that caught her eye and browsed the various trinkets hung up along the hooks in the store. There was quite a vast collection, but Relie had one thing in mind.

“Aha!” With a satisfied flourish, Relie picked the London eye keychain off of the hook and glanced at the price. It was outrageously expensive for a simple keychain, but Relie had been expecting that. She headed to the counter to pay for it, immediately attaching it to her keyring, which already had two other keychains on it; one with a dog, for Fe‘licks’, and one with the letter ‘R’ for ‘Relie’.

She brought the keychains to her eye, noting how the silver on the ‘R’ was tarnished, and how the dog seemed slightly rusty. That was probably due to the tradition she and Felicks had, of rubbing their keychains for good luck before any major life event.

Pocketing her keyring again, Relie moved on to her second item, checking off the first.

See the royal gardens (and steal some flowers). Relie shook her head exasperatedly. It was so in-character of Felicks to come up with some daring idea, then pass away before he could accompany Relie to get it done.

Relie had one hell of a time trying to get to the royal gardens, navigating the Tube with a load of difficulty. After she finally managed to arrive, she began plotting ways to obtain flowers without being arrested. (Hopefully.)

She decided to casually stroll around the royal garden, “inspecting” the flowers. When she found some very pretty ones that she liked, she knelt on the floor and pretended to tie her shoelaces, stealthily plucking a few and placing them in her purse.

“Sorry for killing you guys, please don't wither,” she whispered guiltily to her purse before looking back up, hoping that no one had seen her.

Relie exited the gardens, and she could feel her heart pounding as she walked past the guards, knowing damn well that it was not a crime, but she definitely should not have done what she just did.

As soon as she was past the gates, she glanced down at her phone to check off the item, and smiled to herself. You are on a roll, Aurelia Carter.

Before the next item, she had to go get lunch. It was already way past midday, and would have been sweltering hot if it were not for the dense cloud cover looming ominously over the sky.

It was most definitely going to rain soon, and Relie began making mental preparations for how she was going to get home if it was raining.

Relie opted to get a sandwich for lunch, munching on it (not very noisily, she hoped) as she looked about near the place she had gotten lunch, looking for a place she could buy some champagne.

The last item on the list was relatively easy. Get hella drunk. Relie loved this one most of all, and she knew that if Felicks were there, the two of them would definitely have caused quite a ruckus, feeding on the chaos like they absorbed explosive energy.

Dropping by a store to get a bottle of champagne, Relie saw a police car parked outside. Curious, she loitered about the store until she saw a police officer going into the car and starting the engine.

Cursing herself for not renting a car, Relie chased after the police car as it took off, earning some weird looks from passers-by. by this time, it had started drizzling, which may have been a reason that people were looking at her oddly.

She ran until she was out of breath, afraid that she might drop the glass bottle. She gathered her composure and caught her breath, sending apologetic grins to people looking at her judgmentally, before making her way back to the subway station in order to go back to the hotel.

By the time Relie had gotten dinner (a very, very filling burrito) and headed back to the hotel to retire, it was already late evening.

She treated herself to a long, relaxing bubble bath, reclining in the bathtub as she propped her feet up. Afterwards, she brushed her teeth and went onto the bed, leaning back as she inspected the bottle of champagne.

“Huh. Fancy.” She turned it this way and that, nodding approvingly before popping the cork and pouring herself a glass. Or rather, a mug, since the hotel only provided mugs (presumably meant for hot coffee).

“Hey Felicks! Here’s to your bitch-ass and my long life. I’m so delusional,” she muttered to herself. “Talking to my dead brother. I sound like an idiot, I bet.”

She fell into silence for a short period, swirling the glass and watching the red liquid swish and slosh around.

“Well, I hope you’re happy. And here’s to me finally moving the fuck on and getting on with my life. Hope I won’t be consumed by grief and shit like that.”

With that monologue, she proceeded to down the glass, wincing at the sting before she poured herself another glass, until she had finished the entire bottle.

Mission: get hella drunk, achieved.

#Spotify #🎤 — spotify collections #🪁 — my works #felicks carter #relie carter

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