#lmao i do not have a problem with interracial relationships

[jenifercheck]

hollywood: we paired a white person with a person of color in a love story and mostly centered on the white person but don't forget that their love interest is a poc. we did it. again. we're geniuses. kings of diversity. absolutely brilliant. interracial relationships will stop racism.

[vacantgodling]

personally bothers me when ppl are like uwu Iago is gay for othello and completely ignore his racism let alone the racism throughout the play

lmao thank u for stopping by to talk old books with me :3c

but tbh thank god i’ve never seen this take in the wild because i just 👁️👁️ did we read the same play? are you okay??

iago’s like not even subtly racist. like the whole play is very racist in general when you start deconstructing it and thinking about it with a critical lens.

(such as: black/dark skinned men are going to come around and seduce your pure white daughters with either “magic” or their physicality, abuse them, black men are inherently violent and angry and good for their physical prowess, the only reason a white woman would love a black man is because she pities him… like i can go on)

however, aside from desdemona’s father, iago is the Most and honestly only maliciously racist character, and it’s not even just towards othello lmao (looking at his speech about how a black woman who’s smart would only be of value if she married a white man 😒) like, i understand the ideology behind wanting to read homoerotic jealousy into his actions because why is he so fixated and jealous of this (1) man who has “everything he wants” and tbh perhaps it could work if the play itself wasn’t saying, in part, that othello cannot be trusted with the things he was “freely given” stolen because he’s black/dark skinned/from the Moors, however ya wanna put it.

like it’s easier to read homoeroticism into fucking julius caesar (the play, and i suppose the man) than this play. in hamlet, CLEARLY, than this one. and then it creates a whole host of other issues with the play IF iago is gay because then *insert a slew of homophobic stereotypes here*

however, what gets me is the play already does give reasoning behind iago’s actions. like as i was reading wiki and analyses of it after i finished my first pass of it, there seems to be a lot of “discourse” around iago’s motivations and how they’re not clear… but they are? at least to me? like, he’s egotistical, and big for his britches. he’s petty and jealous and feels that he deserves things simply because he wants them. he wants the lieutenant position because he feels he’s owed it for being done the disservice of having to serve a Moor in the first place and for being a tenured soldier for so long; and whether or not cassio is competent are neither here nor there, the point is if you get passed up for a promotion at work: work harder, accept it, or just fucking quit. but iago decided to make it everyone else’s problem. it really didn’t have much to do with desdemona herself (though i could argue that he was perhaps jealous that othello had a pretty wife who actually loved him; because even though i mentioned the racist sentiments about white women and black men earlier i don’t think desdemona is a racist character in the slightest: she fell in love with othello for who he is and she is faithfully in love with him to the end. that doesn’t change the outside perspective of those who see their interracial relationship, which is very translatable into real life in how interracial relationships are viewed but that’s a whole different conversation), nor do i think did it have to do with this weird homoerotic tension people want to force into the reading.

whenever iago says that he ‘loves’ othello, people should understand that in this time period the word “love” was (1) more freely used to describe a wide variety of positive emotions (2) in this context probably meant something more akin to “loyal” that he wouldn’t betray othello or that he values him as a subordinate should (which is clearly sarcasm) and (3) be read with heavy damn sarcasm especially when iago is not talking directly to othello. he doesn’t care about othello in the slightest; and i would argue that even if iago was made lieutenant from jump he would be scheming about how to become general. we would still have a play about how iago hates and wants to “dethrone” othello. like he’s just fucking selfish in how he treats everyone throughout the play lmao. he doesn’t even describe othello in a “i hate that i yearn for you” type of way like there is Nothing that can construct this narrative to me in the text.

so like long story short (i didn’t mean to rant but yknow ya got me going) i think a homoerotic reading of iago is just kind of out there at best and just irresponsible at worst. there’s plenty of other characters you can read as gay in shakespeare’s works, even fucking desdemona and emilia in this play itself have a better gay reading than iago and othello lmao.

obviously shippers gonna ship and like do you but i just don’t see it.

[raayllum]

One of the things I like about tdp is how diverse it is, and not only with LGBTQIA+ people/couples. Nothing wrong with that ofc, but some shows that market themselves with "representation" only have that as the main focus, and its nice to have a show that has that AND more without all the dumb stereotypes. And honestly as a woc i'm just glad to see an asian who isn't short or nerdy for once lmao (I hope this doesn't come off as homophobic or anything btw, and sorry if this got posted twice ;w;)

Oh, you are preaching to the choir, and you are absolutely right. I’ve written before on how fandom prioritizes queer rep — specifically “same sex” presenting rep — above all else, particularly race. It’s super evident in the way interracial couples (canon or fanon, but it’s especially annoying when the ship is canon) is bemoaned as “can’t a guy and girl just be friends” often so the white character of the match can have a same sex relationship with another white character. It very much reeks of competing representation needs that queer white people in particular (which as one, I think I can say) don’t realize are competing. I’ve written more extensively about it before and it’s beyond annoying.

Especially bc I’m a white pan queer in a same sex presenting relationship (neither my partner nor myself are women but we’re still socially perceived that way), so like, I get it. But I will always be just as happy about a cute & healthy interracial “het” relationship as I would be about a queer ship.  (Because my relationship is also interracial, too.) Because Yes, it’s wonderful seeing my queerness in things like The Dragon Prince and the Owl House — I’ve shed happy tears over it before — but it’s also important to see beyond my own personal representation horizons to pursue and support others.

It’s also frustrating how much representation has become synonymous with queer rep when like, no, it’s not the only rep that matters. Disabled rep matters, neurodivergent rep matters, religious (ex: Jewish, Muslim) rep matters, racial rep matters. And we need stories with all of those things even when they don’t overlap, and to celebrate when they do.

Like I love the How To Train Your Dragon franchise, but an antagonist in the tv show falls into antisemitic caricatures (so does Tangled, twice unfortunately) and what little racial rep it has also isn’t great. But the two main leads are disabled with another two disabled characters, and that’s all awesome and important. Again, more diverse stories for variety is key.

Hot take, maybe, but TDP would still be groundbreaking with its racial and disabled rep even if there was no queer rep, which is a lovely — and is groundbreaking in its own way. The Dragon Prince has two same sex kisses in 27 episodes — one of which takes place only fifteen episodes into the series. What other kid’s animated show can say that?

And TDP’s Asian rep is also something I don’t feel enough people praise, tbh, particularly in regards to Callum and Ezran in some ways? Like Amaya and Sarai are heavily praised, and rightfully so, but Callum is also an Asian lead (and arguably the Main lead of the show) and Ezran is Black and Asian. 

It was a source of frustration when people felt like they had to justify shipping something “het” like Rayllum by making it “woke” somehow, based upon gender roles and insisting that Rayla had to be taller and Callum had to stay shorter (because one inch is that important, apparently?). And I’m totally fine with that headcanon, I have no problem with it. I do not care. But it ignores the interracial aspect of Rayllum’s relationship and that Asian men being shorter is the stereotype. Just like how women being shorter is a stereotype. In fandom, they can coexist, and whichever one canon goes with (if either) will be subversive in its own way. But the whole thing and the way it pops back up from time to time is absolutely a symptom of people not knowing how to look at race just as much as gender or queer rep in fandom.

Most of the Dragon Prince is good about it, though, which I appreciate, and I think it’s a great reflection of how the show treats representation, too: all important, overlapping, and intersecting.

[lifetanes]

im just gonna say it: if wattson/mirage/crypto would be octanes best friend since childhood u guys would eat that shit up. it‘s always an interracial het ship involving a black woman that makes some of u go „the childhood friends to lovers trope is overused“ or „why cant guys and girls just be friends” or going to other lengths to stomp that ship down (like actually accusing shippers of supporting incest?? lmao (which is extra funny because those same people ship darksparks and by that logic... (not hating on darksparks, love them))) and it’s annoying as hell because no that trope is not overused. it might be with white straight ships, since that’s probably the majority of canon or teased ships, but it’s still something i rarely see with characters of color (especially black women) which is super frustrating as a woman of color (and extra frustrating as a black woman). and i hate that this is something that happens in every fucking fandom and just like in every other fandom you can't say anything because people don’t think it’s a problem or tell u u just want to start a race thing or whatever :))) like pls sit down before u try to find another reason why that ship shouldn’t be valid and consider if it’s really the trope/them being childhood besties/their relationship being unhealthy/etc bothering you or if it’s the character the people are shipping your fav with and therefore keeping from whatever it is u ship (and if u srsly think it’s the trope or characters being friends first pls consider that this isn’t something that happens to a lot of black women in books, games, tv etc and let us who rarely get to see and enjoy that trope just enjoy it without slapping a “they are friends” on everything we do. we're fully aware this ship probably will never be canon. doesn’t mean u have to ruin it for us. thank u)

[inmyarmswrappedin]

It kinda confusing to me how people think it's absurd Sana/Amira/Imane left their religion but would love if Yousef/ Sofiane who grew up in a religion that didn't suited them went back to Islam or Dani convert. I would hate both. Religion is a big deal and I would never convert to be with someone. And if they showed that, it would have be on their own season , not Sana's. It would be better a relanshionship where both of them practice the Islam. Where NO ONE would have to change something so big

+ so it makes sense to me that Dani and Amira didn't end up togheter. And we don't know if the other Sana's end up with their pairs. They are just teenagers and this big decision can be dificult when they are older.

Hi anon 🍃 I think this issue is more complicated than “if Sana/Amira/Imane won’t leave Islam, Yousef/Sofiane/Dani shouldn’t have to convert (back) to Islam either!”

I think one thing Skam España got right is that the Sana/Yousef conflict is on a subtextual level about integration. I read opinions of people who aren’t in fandom and aren’t interested in the opinions of Muslim and poc, and one thing that struck me about these conversations is which s4 characters they regarded positively and why. For instance, Elias drinking was regarded positively because to them it meant that Elias was letting go of his Muslim values and adopting Western values by drinking. Similarly, Yousef leaving Islam because he perceived Islam to be harmful to his white friend was also regarded positively.

In real life, second generation Muslim Immigrants can become atheist or Christian or neopagans or be more or less devout, and it can happen because they woke up one day and saw their religion had been harming them, or harming their parents, or harming a white friend or a woman or a gay person or whoever. A hijabi can marry a Christian man or a Hindu woman or a Taoist nb person. The problem is that media/art doesn’t happen in a vacuum. The Sana seasons are occurring at a time of great Islamophobia in the western world, where people are being fed the idea that the greatest enemy to LGBTI people are Muslims (I can tell you the biggest threat against LGBTI people in Spain aren’t Muslims, but right-wing parties and their adherents). Muslim people are being told to leave or be ousted, at worst, or ~integrate and adopt western values~, at best. 

And tbh, these networks making Sana seasons because they’re contractually obligated to do so are scared as fuck, because the islamophobic propaganda machine is really powerful. Entire media conglomerates sustain themselves on portraying Muslims as Public Enemy #1. So they do these lukewarm seasons where the Sanas are shown to be on the receiving end of islamophobia, racism and misogyny, without pointing fingers to the people at fault (because in some ways, these media companies are the people at fault, esp if they’re in the news business, and profiting off pitting the poor against each other). 

Anyway. I would’ve hated a storyline where Dani converted to Islam, because Dani would’ve still been a whitewashed version of a moc. (Yes. Yes he is. The Dani/Amira conflict is the Sana/Yousef conflict over religion and integration. Give it up already.) But I also agree that a conversion storyline for Dani would’ve only made sense if Dani had been the main, because he would have had the most dynamic character arc of the two. Other than that... As an atheist (so, like, I have no idea what I’m talking about, really. I don’t particularly care about people’s relationship with religion because it’s not my business lmao), I think religion is a big or a small a deal as you want to make it. Some people have a change of heart and convert in 7 weeks and some clips. Some others are born again later in adulthood. 

If I pretend Yousef’s character wasn’t originally a moc, I think I could’ve been interested in Dani converting. But lmao no network in the western world has the utter balls to go against the Islamophobic propaganda machine in such a way. 

(Anyway, for people who think I’m just a hater who haaaates interfaith relationships, I ship Petter and Zehra in Blank, and I ship many interfaith and interracial relationships! Fuck, I even ship Vilde/Sana and most of the remake versions! Go suck your toe and leave me alone!)

[gendergraveyard]

LGBT+ Graphic Novel/Comic recommendations

Bloom//Kevin Panetta: This is beautiful love story about Ari, a bakers son and Hector, a guy who loves to bake. Ari experiences conflict with his family and job. The book normalizes the thought of being gay so it’s subtle and there’s no conflict around that. The art is very simple with its shades of blue and I absolutely love it. It’s not heavily romantic?

The Prince and the Dressmaker//Jen Wang: Gender fluid representation! Sebastian is a prince who loves style. Frances is a seamstress who loves twisting up her designs. As Frances is fired, she gets recognized for her talent and takes a job to become Sebastians seamstress. This novel discusses gender identity and acceptance. The art a colorful and every page fills you with excitement. Conclusion: cute af.

Heartstopper//Alice Oseman: I personally have only read the webcomics because I’m closeted and I feel like the cover is visually homosexual and I didn’t want any questions from my family lmao. I usually like to get the physically copies though so maybe you do to. To be honest this is one of my favorite things to read. I love it. Charlie is openly gay, and Nick is a kindhearted jock. The themes are a little touchy so if you are triggered by some of these it might not be for you: abusive relationships, labeling and figuring out sexuality, eating disorders, lgbt+, and a lot of romance. I don’t believe it shows anything graphic but it definitely mentions them. For me a bisexual, I kin with Nick. It’s a wonderful story and Alice Oseman is still coming out with new chapters and books. It discussed very common problems and is filled with so much love. It’s wholesome and the art is simply amazing.

Cosmo Knights//Hannah Templer: So far there is only one comic is the series. If you like action, power, and love, you’ll want to read Cosmo Knights. Pan had a simple life, until now. She goes on an adventure with two Cosmo Knights in hope to make a difference. These woman are powerful. There’s a lot of interracial relationship, as a black girl I like seeing this type of representation in books. The art is fantastic, colorful, detailed, exciting! I find myself crushing on maybe too many of these characters. I aspire to draw like this one day. I’ve only read this one and I’m begging for more.

Heavy Vinyl//Carly Usdin: Chris has a job working at a vinyl shop. Her coworkers are all woman and have a strong passion for music. As a band member who was supposed to play goes missing, Chris discovers her coworkers secrets and decides to join in. The art is so beautiful, colorful, detailed, and everyone is gorgeous! They all have different styles and personalities. Chris likes one of her coworkers and I haven’t read the next comic but I’m excited to see how their relationship progresses. Again these woman are strong and break stereotype.

[slasherscream]

A/N: i'm just a black girl with terrible taste in men! i will never change! i will never improve! that is a promise! 

     billy loomis x black fem!reader x stu macher          ft. that's it .... that's the whole concept      (actually kinda totally hair focused this time)

                                                     ——————– 

There are a lot of little things you don't consider when first getting into an interracial relationship. One of those things you hadn't considered because it was such an everyday part of life? You actually feel a little insecure about going to sleep/wrapping up your hair at night.

The boys notice eventually although it takes a while. They know something is wrong long before they know what's wrong. You always get antsy at bedtime like you're missing some crucial part of your routine. Next morning? You scramble out of their arms far too early just to go to the bathroom and shut yourself in for thirty minutes.

Sometimes you come lay back down after these morning trips and go ...right back to sleep?? But always laying on your stomach?

First they think.... upset stomach in the morning? Or something else dumb and they're not gonna ask about that and piss off their girlfriend. 

Billy notices first that you always come back out of the bathroom with your hair done perfectly. It is ass o'clock in the morning why are your fucking....edges laid? You're literally like this every morning for awhile. Once he realizes that like... you're not even doing a full morning routine? That you didn't wash your face or brush your teeth or anything else? That you jumped outta bed to do nothing other than your hair? Oooooh my god, babe what the fuck-

Confronts you immediately after he figures it out and unfortunately that confrontation happens at ass o'clock in the morning. Stu is muttering for the two of you to shut up and go back to sleep but Billy smacks him awake.

He was gonna start yelling until he sees you curled up with your knees to your chest looking vulnerable. What the fuck did Billy say to you to make you upset when we should all be sleeping?

Was gonna just insta-start a fight with Billy but then Billy just goes straight for the throat of the problem with, "what are you doing all this for? what's wrong?"

You gotta fan your eyes to not cry because they're already sore from lack of peacefuL SLEEP. You lay it all out on the court. Confessing to worrying they'd find you unattractive if you did your usual nightly routine. Stressing over your hair health. Dreading the start of the day and the detangling process. Waking up early just to make sure you look nice-ish when they wake up. You're miserable!

They let you finish without interrupting because they see you need to get it all off your chest but as soon as your quiet for a little bit indicting you're done Stu starts babbling out reassurance after reassurance. Billy just grabs you and drags you into his lap, kisses your forehead. You all fall back asleep curled up together, both the boys laying on you so you can't get up and go do your new routine that's exhausting you. Everyone has morning hair, babe. Please stop stressing yourself out.

If you're still insecure after you've talked to the point you don't do the nightly routine you confess to telling them you used to do? One of two things is gonna happen.

A) the next night when you get ready to crawl into bed with them they walk outta the bathroom and oh my fucking god?? What are they wearing? Silk bonnets bitch, that's right. Now we’re all matching and some of us can calm down- Put on your bonnet and go to sleep.

That was Stu’s idea and he's lowkey proud of it and it's lowkey cute. Actually pretty reassuring too. A very Stu way to deal with insecurities. make them seem smaller by making them funny. They didn’t just do it to make you chuckle a little and then rip them off, though. They got them so that you’d feel normal wearing yours. So anytime they’re just alone in the house with you? Bonnets? On, everybody! Mandatory bonnet time. It fucking works though! 

Billy’s other solution? Learns how to tie head scarves for sleep. Says fuck it! Forget the bonnet then. But hair care is very important to him. He babies his own hair. And he knows just how important hair is for black women (cause you've told him). Also knows how hard it is to maintain.

He’s not gonna sit around and watch you fuck up your pretty hair because you don’t want them seeing you in a sleep bonnet. Ridiculous! So he goes looking for alternatives and finds head scarves. Cue sigh of relief.

He practices on Stu so that by the time he comes to you with the solution he’s already a pro at it and you can’t say no (they do a lot of tying ..."things" as ghostface so tbh even Stu would be pretty good at tying scarves right off the bat).

Makes the wraps cute so that you like them. Also had Stu buy a shit ton of really cute scarves. And if they come off in the night like scarves sometimes (often) do? bAM every pillowcase in the house is silk now too. Your boy’s have got you covered.

They also just get a bunch of regular bandana's because Stu slept in some of Billy’s practice wraps to make sure he was doing them well enough to withstand the toss and turns of sleep? And Stu realized .... hmmm.... sometimes this shit..... is annoying to sleep in. So when you need a break? Bandana time!

Honestly even outside of sleepy times Billy actually likes the way headwraps look on you? And he likes doing them/experimenting with styles n’ what-not. This eventually leads to him just helping you/fucking around with your hair in general. Goodbye paying someone to do it for you- 

This is now a bonding activity! Y’all watch horror movies and he does your hair for you. Why did you jump for that? It wasn’t even scary and now you fucked up my braid- 

He’s becoming #Too Woke and #Knowledgeable and is ten seconds from starting to call you tender-headed adjkl. No, but seriously he’s actually very gentle and watched a shit ton of videos. Mostly uses the comb just for parting and finger combs through the rest because, "Like 80% of the tutorials I found said over-combing isn’t good for black hair"!

See? Babe, I’m paying all kinds of attention.

Stu helping you with your hair? Lmao.... he tried one time and Billy was ten seconds away from stabbing him watching him fuck it up. He’s now very protective over your head 

This isn’t our hair, Billy. This is my hair / Not after all the work I’ve put into it, it fucking isn’t-

The one (1) thing Stu is allowed to do to your hair in terms of “helping” is slicking or brushing part of it down and then poofing another part of it up. Yes, you heard me. Billy said Stu has afro-puff rights only! Stu would complain at this lack of faith in him but like .... he sees how the two of y’all’s hands be hurting and ... mmm. Pass. Keep those problems to yourself! He’s just gonna be the moral support who brings the two of you snacks and orders pizza.

You’ll come home and Billy will be in the kitchen stirring something unidentifiable.... blood still on him from their latest kill. Stu is just watching him... chilling...hanging. They were gonna try out a new way to remove bloodstains but found a natural hair conditioner recipe and got distracted like idiots.

Their one shared brain-cell is focused on loving you.

                                                     ——————–

[ocalaghan]

I just got caught up with Workin’ Moms and I am BUMMED that season four won’t be out for another year. I do have some issues with it in that while it tries to tackle problems of privilege, it doesn’t seem to acknowledge its own privilege? I was excited to see the lesbian relationships and interracial relationships but I feel like the POC on the show don’t really get their stories told in the same way the white women do; the cast may be ensemble but it’s not equal. 

Nevertheless, I’d like to see what season four brings. 

I don’t want Kate back with Nathan at all, and for her business to thrive more. I want to see Anne come to terms with what her ex-husband did to her (and for him to be punished for what he did to other women) and hopefully regain the trust of Alice (and for Alice to be less of a rebellious lil bitch lmao). I’d love to see more of Sonia and Ian, and for Jenny to have... any kind of positive character development at all. 

There’s more but I HAVE QUESTIONS and I want them answered sooner than a an entire year from now. :-(

[imkindanerdforlanguages]

aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was actually right about everything about my crush and her maybe girlfriend! Full story below and some will be repeat if anyone’s actually been keeping up with this. Skip to the third to last paragraph if you only wanna hear what happened today and not all the back story. I wrote this mainly so I could look at it later and remember and it turned out wayyyy longer than expected

Ok so I’ve like this girl a long time and we’ve been friends never questioned too much of she liked girls or not so that was never really a problem. So cut to football season 2017. We’re both in marching band and that’s how we became friends that year. We ended up both being in the same English class that school year and I become good friends with some of her other friends, including her maybe gf. (Shout out to those friends they’re super great). Since I have a massive crush on her (it’s 2018 by now) I pay more attention to her and stuff and I kinda notice how she acted with maybe gf. Like paying attention to maybe gf like I payed attention to her, looking at her lips, always mentioning her, stuff like that. So I think “oh she likes her, oh well, I wish her the best.” I’m quite shy irl so I wasn’t gonna make a move or anything and I was content what it was, though hopeful that she’ll maybe like me someday. I hate if people come on too strong myself and kinda believe that feelings are just gonna be what they are, rather than things that can swung heavily (idk if that makes sense but whatever)

So summer break happens then we’re at marching band 2018 still got my crush, still hopeful but not expecting much bc I still notice things between my crush and maybe gf. I think maybe gf is straight (I know, I know I’m not for assuming people’s sexuality but it was what it was) maybe it was my feelings making me think that maybe gf would never reciprocate but anyways I mainly feel bad for my crush bc it looks she really likes this girl and I can relate lol. So homecoming comes and I really wanna slow dance with her but I miss my fucking chance bc I go to the bathroom. Oh well. She did grind on me at one point but all the girls in our group were so whatever it was nice but didn’t really mean anything. And I actually worked up the nerve to text her that she looked gorgeous at homecoming (which she did) and I’m still proud of myself for that

One day shortly after, we’re at a band competition in the warmup room chilling bc we’re waiting for the rain to stop so we can go on. We’re talking in a group and someone ends up asking her if she has a crush on maybe gf, and she quickly denies (and I think yeah right lol) but then they ask if she has a crush on me and she stutters our her denial. The way she did it made me think that maybe I had a chance (there were other things too of course like the occasional look, etc). So the next day I muster up all the courage I have and text her asking if she has a crush on me, she says no, and I confess that I like her to get it off my chest. I thank god that we still remained great friends after that. We actually haven’t brought it up since.

Then the next football game she’s asked if she’s ever kissed a girl and she says yes and I’m like ah ha! I bet they are actually dating. (Side note that I kinda came out to like have the band that night cause someone asked if I was straight and I said no). I get a text from maybe gf the next day asking for relationship advice (she had never mentioned that she was in a relationship before) or something (I can’t really remember anymore). She’s playing the pronoun game so I figure that it’s a girl she’s dating and she’s says so later and tells me she’s bi. I told her I was bi too and we bonded over that and stuff it was nice and brought us closer etc. She says she doesn’t wanna tell me who it is and I respected that but I kinda figured that it was my crush. I think oh well that sucks for me but I’m happy for them. For things like this I largely live by just flowing with life and seeing where it takes you. If I didn’t I’d probably literally explode from stress lmao

Over then next couple months she tells me various things about her relationship which went through ups and downs. She felt trapped and pressured to come out and like nobody else could ever love her (which I always denied). There was a rough patch where she overloaded me with emotional stuff (which I am not prepared to handle) but it’s not too relevant to the story other than that a lot of the things she said made me more sure that my crush was her gf bc it just sounded like how she would act (note that after this she pretty much stopped texting me about her gf so I didn’t really get anymore info)

Sidenote: I’m not too sure how healthy their relationship actually was and since I only ever got one side of it I’m still not too sure how much of what I was told was truthful vs exaggerated since maybe gf was going through a rough patch. There were things like her panicking bc her gf was talking about marriage (yikes) and coming out and stuff. But she also talked about how it was easy to not cheat bc there was no one else in our town and she would kiss other girls as like a shock factor thing at parties and be like “my gf shouldn’t get mad bc it’s not like fr” (also yikes). I’ve pretty much come to the conclusion that both of them had things that weren’t the best but we’re teenagers and this was probably both of their first relationships so I’m not labeling them as bad people or anything. The biggest clue tho that my crush was her gf was that she said that her gf was the only person who knew all the terrible things about her/her life and since my crush was probably the closest to her I sorta assumed

Sidenote 2: some other things that made me sure of their relationship: my crush once got jealous of me in the group chat (she jokingly told me no to something, idk what anymore, and my crush was like what about me??? Lol), maybe gf kinda tripped and my crushes hand went to her waist in an intimate way to stabilize her, they were always each other’s lock screens, my crush would always give in to maybe gf (which sometimes I didn’t like bc I felt like she had to give into some things she shouldn’t have— not like really bad things but just kinda :/ and she’d have to apologize for playful insults even tho maybe gf said like the same level of insult), the eye contact when our teacher mentioned interracial sex lol, also the constant FaceTiming and calling that lowkey got on my nerves (nyc trip was the worst but really wasn’t that bad. It was mostly the jealousy that made it suck)

Sidenote 3: prom happened somewhere in here and we cuddled on the couch a bit but not like what your thinking, more like sat really close but it was nice. At one point she was like completely on top of me bc she was fighting with someone playfully

Anyways moving on to the end of the school year, I’m like 90% sure they’re dating, and I notice things seem tense between them. My crush would put her head down a lot and they would playfully insult each other with a bit more bite. They didn’t hang around each other as much as they used to, etc. I was just really picking up on some vibes. Eventually things seem to settle down a bit buts it’s the end of the year already and they’re graduating and stuff.

All three of us ended up doing this program at a university that lets kids work with scientists and learn about stem etc. we each work in different labs so we don’t see each other everyday but the group gets together like 1-2 times a week. During these, I notice that they just don’t seem as close, like they didn’t sit next to each other, phone lock screens aren’t each other, crush’s name in maybe gfs phone is her full name not nick name (though this could have always been that, I’m not sure), my crush no longer apologizes or cares as much if maybe gf gets a little mad (which she gets easily). Taking this with the tension before school got out into consideration, I figure that they must have broken up. Cool cool, maybe I have a chance but also she’s moving across the state for college in a month so :/

That brings us to the grand finale: today. So I have no idea really if they have broken up or if they were even together in the first place. But then maybe gf mentions that she is now dating this guy (which I approve of, he’s super sweet). I kinda suspected bc a picture of him was her lock screen, they had been hanging out a lot, initials in insta bios (which Ik should be a dead give away but she once said that she hates how people assumed that her and this other guy were together when she was dating her gf do I didn’t wanna assume anything) and I was like ah ha! At lest Ik that they aren’t dating now if they ever did in the first place. She invites me to come hang out with her, her bf and another couple that I’m good friends with tomorrow. So after I get home, partly bc I don’t wanna be the only single person there, partly bc I wanna see if I can weasel out the truth, and partly bc I may have day dreamed about us being all coupley too and maybe a kiss (oh how I wish). I text her and ask if my crush can come too so I’m not the only single person there. She texts back saying that it would be a good idea. So I figure it’s now or never so I ask if it’s bc they dated. She originally says no but then says admits that yes they dated but she broke up with her and they are still friends.

She basically says that she broke up with her bc she’s not ready to be out bc she doesn’t wanna lose some of her friends, wants to be normal, etc. she’s always been insecure, so it’s not too surprising for me. I sincerely hope that one day she reaches a place where she can be herself and not worry. I also feel bad for my crush bc I have a feeling that she’s probably still pretty hurt over it and I wish her the best too. I’m not gonna try to like make a move or anything bc a. I have no idea how long it’s been since the breakup and how she feels about it b. I’ve already expressed feelings so I don’t wanna be that person who keeps pusing after they’re rejected c. She’s moving like 6 hours away in a month

All in all I’m super surprised that I actually picked up on the fact that they were dating and had broken up bc I’m am not very emotionally intelligent at all. Honestly I doubt I would have picked up on much if I was paying such close attention bc of my crush. I spent like an hour+ writing this I can’t believe I actually had so much to say and it makes my life seem much more dramatic that it is. Thank you if you actually read all this or have kept up with my woes in the slightest bye

[yaz-the-spaz]

Thoughts on scripted?

hey nonnie, so i’m so so sorry i kept you waiting for like four days for this but i just really needed some time to properly process and collect my thoughts (cause i have a lot on this) and take my time to get them down in a coherent way, i still feel like it’s a bit jumbled and unclear at times but i tried my best to explain my thoughts as best i could. i hope it’s sufficient...

My Thoughts on Scripted

so i wanna preface this by making it clear to everyone who may read this that this is strictly my own interpretation of things and my own opinion on what zayn’s trying to convey in this song. personally, i think this song is very much about public images, narratives, and stunting, and sticking it out through all of that, so that’s the direction/theme that a lot of my interpretations of the lyrics in this song are gonna lean towards. you don’t have to agree. in fact, if you disagree that’s fine and i welcome and any all rational and fair/polite discussion on different interpretations of the song and certain verses or lines within it. i’m in no way trying to convince anyone to see anything a certain way (and my own interpretations and thoughts/opinions on this may even evolve or change with time), but i was asked by this nonnie to share my thoughts (currently) on the song and so that’s what i’m doing, and if anyone has a problem with any of the opinions or interpretations stated here i just ask that you address me about it respectfully :)

ok now onto the song analysis:

Blurry TV screens

Fuzzy broken scenes

Finding words don't have flow

Blurry TV screens

Fuzzy broken scenes

Hold her close finding love

so this verse to me seems like it could be meant to have a double meaning, as in 1) the scenes or roles they [he and liam and/or the other boys] have to play out (i.e. stunts, fake dates, scripted interviews, etc. that they feel like they’re playing out like a scene in a movie/tv show - mgmt telling them hold her hand this way, hug/kiss at this angle so it looks more intimate, ok now let’s take this pic/video and then we’ll do another angle; making sure to only show pieces of the story like scenes and only the pieces and angles that fit the narrative they wanna sell, etc.) and/or 2) the time they get to themselves which often feels like only snapshots that go by too quickly and are like a blur/fuzzy in their minds (stolen moments together in between stunt outings and shows and things where they have to perform/are expected to put on and keep up their usual act for the cameras before they can go back to being themselves again/have some time alone together to just be again, etc.), and the “finding words don’t have flow” part could mean because he doesn’t know how to talk about it or express how he feels about it cause he just has so many conflicting feelings (or even just that he can’t talk about it cause he’s not allowed)

Hearts don't feel the same

And the names we like to say

Change with time and age

so this seems to clearly be referring to feelings changing - though not necessarily in a bad way, maybe just maturing and growing together and changing as people, as in the infatuation is gone and you love each other differently than you did when you first got together but there’s still so much unconditional love there it’s just a different (like a more serious or maybe even a deeper) kind of love, or could be referring to friendships (whether between him and the boys or other people from his personal life) and those friendships changing or even fading with time, or even feelings about a situation changing over time; it could also be taken a bit more literally too of course as well and have a negative meaning as in we don’t love each other anymore/don’t feel the same way about each other anymore/aren’t as close anymore (again whether between friends or a romantic partner, or even not feeling the same way about a situation anymore, etc.), it’s all up to interpretation i guess and how you choose to see it but i think it can be thought of in lots of different ways

for the names thing i think this can also have multiple meanings, like maybe it could be referring to names he and liam and/or the boys call each other (friendly nick names, pet names as a couple, etc.) and/or the names they’re made to mention/promo in interviews, like how some periods we would get a bunch of louis and zayn mentioning each other or niall and zayn mentioning each other lilo or niam mentioning each other, etc. and then other times they’d be promo-ing other random people (like liam mentioning charlie puth every 2 seconds for a while, etc.)

[fyi i’ll be skipping over any repeating refrains/verses since there’s no real need to re-hash things over again or take up unnecessary space with lines that have already been talked about]

So I

I don't wanna say what's scripted

Whether you are or aren't with it

I know what I need

'Cause I

I don't wanna say what's scripted

Whether you are or aren't with it

I know what I need

this part i think is pretty obvious (and i think a lot of people agree) that it’s most likely referring to having to say scripted lines in interviews and things of that sort and that’s why he avoids it so much, he doesn’t wanna be forced or used to sell the narratives they want him to sell and say the company lines they want him to say, he “knows what he needs” and that’s to stay away as much as he can from engaging in all the bs

but again i think it could also have a double meaning in that he maybe doesn’t wanna say or do generic things either and this can be in regards to life in general or more specifically with his romantic partner, like he doesn’t wanna say or do what he’s expected to say/do, he wants to be different and to do things differently/do things in his own unique way (in life in general, but also maybe in his relationship like finding other ways to say “i love you” or to show his love, finding other ways to be together that don’t necessarily follow “traditional” paths which also could be a nod them being in a [conventionally-speaking] “untraditional” relationship, which a lot of people would consider a same-sex interracial interfaith relationship between two huge self-proclaimed dorks lmao to be)

i think it’s important to note that he also includes a snippet of an interview shortly after this part in which he talks about sex not being as meaningful anymore with this generation and how that was a part of what he was trying to convey on ‘let me.’ which begs the question why? why draw attention to this specific interview (one that references ‘let me’) out of all the interviews he could’ve chosen? why draw attention back to such a romantic song (and to the idea of meaningful sex and meaningful relationships) in the middle of this dark part of the album that seems to (imo) mostly be about the negative sides of the industry? we’ll get back to my theory on that in a moment but in the meantime…

there’s also the fact that the melody of song is very somber through most of the song and i think that’s intentional because it kind of serves to evoke the pain and sadness he feels over his situation and i think he wants the listeners to feel and understand that as well and to understand why, to understand all the little things about his whole situation that make him so sad and the main thing seems to be that he has to “say what’s scripted” when he doesn’t want to and isn’t truly allowed to be himself or say or do what he wants as much as he would like. BUT—here’s where we get back to my theory on why he suddenly calls our attention back to such a romantic song and to the idea of meaningful relationships

not long after this point in the song (after the chorus repeats again) the melody suddenly changes, all of a sudden it feels less somber (at least to me), i would almost even characterize it as kind of tentatively hopeful/tentatively optimistic if i had to put a label on it, my theory is that he’s setting for the stage for what comes next, getting us ready for a change in tune (literally but also figuratively as in a change in theme) and then we get this

You'd still remember my eyes

Even if the Men In Black flashed

Their light into your eyes

For the second time this night

It feels right when it's, only you and I

so this seems to be a nod to a huge recurring theme on this album which is this idea of always remembering each other/always being fated to find each other (through space and time and making it together through all kinds of obstacles, etc.)—aka SOUL MATES—which so many songs on this album seem to reference over and over and over again…and which as an aside always reminds me of that moment in an interview (sorry i tried but i couldn’t find a link to it) where i think they’re talking about what would have happened in an alternative universe/timeline if they hadn’t gone on txf and weren’t famous or something like that and zayn says he’s not sure if he would’ve met liam cause “i don’t tend to do much in me own time” and liam’s like “but you might have” and zayn’s like “yeah but maybe” not and Liam Not Having Any of It Payne insists “but then again you might have”

but anyway all that to say that i think it’s clear by this recurring theme that zayn’s definitely since come around to the idea lol and has even adopted him for himself and decided to make into a running theme on the album and not only that but clearly he’s come to believe that the romantic partner (i.e. liam) he keeps alluding to in so many songs on the “icarus” side is his soulmate and they can make it through anything

[but again, as with a lot of the other lines in this song (and on this album in general) i think there’s a small chance this verse could also be have a double meaning as well, possibly as a reference to the fans and how mgmt/1dhq has repeatedly tried to basically do a madagasar penguins ‘you didn’t see anything’ move on us and act like the shit we know we saw never happened by panic-deleting videos and releasing bs articles and manipulating the boys’ twitters; it’s a rather flimsy theory i know, esp given that all the other lines surrounding it suggest that it’s more likely in reference to a personal relationship than a more general reference that could be applied to fans but it’s just something that’s been in the back of my mind ever since i first heard the song so just putting it out there]

Oh, you and I

Oh, you and I

Oh, you and I

Oh, you and I

do i even need to say anything about this?

he repeats it five times which…interesting number first off 😏 (and also separates out the other four from the first one which again - interesting)…but also makes it pretty evident that this is a line that’s being very much emphasized, that has serious meaning, that he wants you to pay attention to, that much is obvious not only in the repetition but the fact that it deviates from the composition of the rest of the song - the music changes/falls away to just a very simple (piano?) melody and beat, the focus is mostly on just his voice and it’s the ever enigmatic “you” that he’s singing to (that also seems to be a running theme on both albums, as he often—not necessarily always but often—seems to differentiate between this “you” and other people/pronouns/things referred to in his songs) in a slightly sped up but very similar style to the style of the harmonies in you & i, a song in which he had very notable harmonies with liam (that’s possibly regarded as the most unequivocal ziam song) that they often romantically and openly serenaded each other with (like specifically turned to each other just to sing to each other), that liam said was his favorite song off the midnight memories album, that liam got a line from (“i figured it out”) permanently tattooed on his arm right below the feather that was widely believed to be the missing feather from zayn’s then chest tattoo (and which many believed being with zayn was the “thing” he figured out), a song that liam cried during the first few times they performed it without zayn, and a song that’s about nothing be able to come between two soulmates people in love who are destined to be together and that clearly had a lot of special meaning to them both (and that the fandom knows and that i’m sure they also know is widely regarded as a ziam song because as liam said on many occasions they see what we say about them, they know what goes on and what we think about the stuff they do/say) - all of that leads me to believe that this was a calculated and very obvious/deliberate move by zayn to emphasize this part in the song so clearly, a [huge] red herring if you will, and i would argue that it has even more significance not only just because of all that’s mentioned above but also because of the fact that he chose to include these lines in a song on the “falls” side of the album, the side that’s supposed to be the more negative/dark side (and the side that i believe is largely representative of his feelings and experience with fame and the entertainment industry). which to me suggests that the overarching message that he’s trying to get across/convey with this song is basically that everything may be shit with how things are being run and the stuff he (and the other boys) are made to do and say but he’s always gonna go his own way and regardless of what gets thrown at them he and liam (and the rest of ot5) are gonna make it through together

[initiumseries]

Some people said it's racist to ship Jalec. Mostly asian people said that, what do you think ? Outside Malec, I don't think Shadowhunters treated the poc/and black characters very well. But there is some meta who explain very well the main problem of jalec (the blog of east asian on western screen). i'm black even if I'm victim of racism it's probably not the same for an asian person. Maybe Jalec fan are racist but the ship itself is not. Malec isn't well written and there is nothing interesting

I see this argument a lot, especially for Malec, Westallen and Bonenzo. I’m sure there are more, that’s just what I’ve seen 

I wish people would learn stronger race analysis because they look really stupid fighting anyone who doesn’t ship interracial relationships that deliberately centre the white person in the relationship, but also blanketing the entire ship with the idea that anyone NOT shipping this interracial pairing is inherently racist. That just doesn’t make any damn sense. Learn facts from fandom people. 

The fact is; it is not inherently racist to ship white characters together.

Racists shipping white characters together to deflect away from poc in the show is not the same as above. It’s usually pretty easy to tell the difference (if your race analysis in media isn’t total basura but anyway..). Racists will also weaponize chemistry to deflect away from ships involving a PoC or Black woman. Again, if you fundamentally understand how chemistry works, this argument is stupid and transparent. 

Now onto Jalec vs Malec: 

You’re right anon, the ship itself isn’t racist, and Malec is poorly written, much like the entire show, but they also have like...NO chemistry. Exhibit A-D or whatever: 

(this watermark is killing me lol but the point remains...)

(he’s using his forearm to keep space btwn them lmao)

Malec look like two aggressively straight guys who don’t know each other that well, forced to pretend they like each other. Meanwhile, Jalec is...Jalec.It’s nobody’s fault that Malec has no chemistry and Jalec does. It’s not racial or gender related. Chemistry just...happens or it doesn’t (as I’ve said before).  So I wish people would spend less time getting worked up about stuff that is just obviously untrue. The dialogue doesn’t even support Malec. They’re always hiding things and lying to each other. Like every episode I watch I’m like..oh...you guys are still together? Why? Meanwhile Jalec dialogue is like: 

I mean...at this point...folks should just take their complaints to the showrunners lol. Not the rest of us for just seeing what’s in front of us lol.

[valeriemperez]

As an objective reviewer, what did you really think of 5x6? I can't tell if I'm letting my disdain for Danielle cloud my judgment or if I should try to rewatch it. I have seen all of the bad reviews and even saw a youtuber who is firmly anti-Iris say its the worst episode of the series but sometimes those things can be the result of group think. Lol sorry for rambling, I'm just so flabbergasted and confused about this episode especially when the last five were so good :(

Personally, I was bored. I rewatched the episode in order to write my review, and objectively (as objective as I can be) I think the problem is that they: 

A) Focused too much on the “science” side of the experiments and why Caitlin and Thomas’ alter egos might be different.B) Placed the emotional emphasis on a relationship we’ve never seen before - Caitlin and Thomas - and that we had never even heard about before two episodes ago. It would have been stronger to have Carla there, and for her and Caitlin to make up after Caitlin realizes her mother was protecting her from Icicle, etc.

Are you going to update the women’s screentime for episode 6?

Just did!

Honestly GG doesn’t seem that close to any of the cast save TC. He mostly keeps to himself while they film and doesn’t seem to hang out with anyone unless it’s something TC arranged for GG to go to. I think left to his own devices GG would stay in his condo and do his own thing. I think that’s what throws people off cause as the lead you’d think GG would be the center of the cast social life like SA. For whatever reason that’s just not who GG is but I get it frustrates people.

Yeah, I definitely think Tom C. is his favorite person in the cast, but he’s generally not a social butterfly like you said.

I just knew the GG apologists were going to be in your inbox. I don’t doubt they are friends, but after watching that video CP tweeted today, he and the other white actors around her are apart of the problem. I will always be grateful to him for advocating WA, but why all of the silence now? Why all of the public weirdness? She is the only one he treats like that. He didn’t even show support for the rag doll actor, who btw, sang his praises more than once. Ellen Pompeo is the ally CP deserves.

I don’t think they’re being particularly weird in public, given that we haven’t really seen them out in public. They seemed fine in the one video we saw on them at the party, for example. But he has been quiet about the show for the most part, I just don’t think it’s specifically directed at or about Candice.

Agree about Ellen, though! Candice could have used way more supportive costars, but thankfully she’s out here succeeding anyway.

Tati, I’m a butthead so I’m on anon 😝 I wonder who that one cast mate could be? The wannabe female lead perhaps…? The fake feminist that has been trying to erase CP’s presence on the show since S1. The been in the game forever chick that still can’t act. I could go on, but I think we all know who the one person is.

LMAO, who ever could you mean????

People are upset because Grant isn’t as openly supportive of Candice as they feel he should be. Honestly, of late he hasn’t seemed to be supportive of much. The show, his friends/family, etc. I think something is going on with him (personally). However, as long as he make it do what it do when he’s on screen with my girl CP making those 😍🥰 and rubbing her unnecessarily so WA continues to be a healthy interracial RL I don’t care if her supports her on sm or not. That’s what we as fans do. #IWDS

This is my thought too. He hasn’t been supporting much other than his skateboards lol. I wish he was more openly supportive of her and that the cast as a whole made their interactions more available for public consumption, but it’s also not something I’m hung up on. They are the way they are, and I wouldn’t trade (almost) any of them.

To me it wasn’t obvious that CP wanted to stand on that side of the cake since she kept looking over to the other side, which was already crammed. I agree that sometimes people project their own feelings into a situation (I’ve read some pretty wild theories about GG snobbing CP bc she’s not in a RL and he dislikes single people) but what we’ve seen of GG and CP outside of SM is positive. We got ONE video from the party and it was good. He’s horrendous on SM though. Don’t care if CP agrees or not

You are 100% right that we’re all projecting, lol. We don’t know them and we only see a tiny sliver of their lives, which they have chosen to show us.

Couldn’t it just be that Candice was standing on the right side of the room to begin with so she just went to the right side of the cake where Danielle N and JPK went too. I don’t think she’s so bothered by DP that she wouldn’t stand next to Grant, Carlos, or Tom because DP was there. I mean we have to remember that Candice is in the same room with DP everyday at work. It’s not like they explode if they get close.

It totally could be that, lol. 

[mininky]

Oh yeah about that story about me and my ex guy friend back in high school, I actually had a feeling that he treated me like shit afterwards because i’m black (dark skin) and he’s wasian (half white and Filipino). Like maybe his family influenced him or maybe it was just himself too afraid to move on with the relationship. But his family was super nice to me when I first met them before our prom. Like idk? I was guessing that but who knows at this point...🙄

I just don’t get why guys around my age don’t want me but older men always do??? Like what does that even mean?? I’m still the same sad single 24 year old 😂

I’m sorry for telling you my sad nonexistent romance stories, lmao I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re annoyed at this point 😂😂😂 but you seem really awesome to talk to and I love your advice though! So thank you! I’ll stop if you want me to 😂😂😂

You’re right! The people that I’m surrounded with are from college and I’m currently from college! No wonder I don’t relate with them because I have morals and values that they can’t seem to understand. 🙄 Lmao I’m so glad that I’m graduating this year! 🙌🏾

First of all I’ve never heard the term Wasian before and it has a really good flow to it, like it’s oddly fun to say. Second of all you’re totally fine, thank you for sending in the asks!!! 

On the family front/skin color front it’s hard to say. I’d like to think that because he grew up in an interracial family it wasn’t that but sadly I have seen a lot of mixed families still hold racist ideas about certain ethnicities. 

Also how old are you talking when you say older? If they’re in relatively the same age range someone who’s been through more life might be more comfortable with moving slow actually, hopefully they’d be less impulsive so maybe that’s not such a bad idea when you do start dating?

And don’t forget, Uni and some of the problems that come with it isn’t forever. Just enjoy your time before you graduate and have fun with it! Try new circles, leave bad energy. Life is short, make the best of it!

[perrentes-ptv]

Prompt: do you think you can do a dandy one based off the song "we dont talk anymore"? (not very emo lmao i know) where they break up and months later one of them is in a new relationship but theyre both not happy about it and they get back in touch and eventually get back together? sorry if this was confusing but thank you (: xx

Title: The apple of my eye also the worm inside 

Pairing: Dandy (David Escamilla/Andy Leo)

Song: Lover Letter - Mark Johns

ADDED: (hi i missed ya) and quick plot idea (is how you say it) can you do a dandy one where they get into a fight and david goes all crazy after and comes back to andy but when andy almost leaves he shows him how much he loves him and stuff (i thought of this while listening to no more bad days by this wild life)

ADDED: HEY!! can you do a dandy fluff where andy gets really depressed and he thinks dave dislikes him, and dave shows him he loves him and stuff?

ADDED: can you please please please write a smut between two of the guys from CTE it can be whoever you choose but please

WARNING CONTAINS: M/M, brake-up, Make-up, talk about therapy, light smut, If you do not like this prompt or pairing, do not read it! It’s not hard

A/N: almost 3K; love this ship so damn much and I miss David he’s not gone i just miss him in CTE and i put one of my other fav band here. 

"I'm not fucking cheating on you, stop asking!"

"Then way are you so damn defensive?"

"I don't know Andy, maybe the fact that your always accusing me of shit I haven't done how fo you think that makes me feel, on a daily bases?"

"I don't-"

"Like honestly Andy, do you trust me at all?"

"Yes but-"

"There shouldn't be a 'but and' if you actually trusted me. You make me feel like shit."

Andy and David stared at each other not saying a word for a moment.

Andy, broke the silence, "You make me feel like a fucking jackass most of the time, you're right maybe I don't trust you anymore since, Allison."

"Then I can't fucking be with you then, i'm so sick and tired of you throwing that in my face for everything."

"Then fucking go."

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

The door slammed as David walked out of their apartment.

*One month later*

"Man, the sleep person and couch potato got nothing on you, Andy, can I call the Guinness world record about you?"

"Sure."

"You wanna get food with me this time?

"No." Andy said.

Brandon sighed and laid back down on Andy's bed. It's been a couple days since he was here and although it doesn't look like Andy moved he does have different clothes on so he is happy that his friend at least change maybe even showered.

Brandon Didn't exactly like the situation his best friend just broke up with boyfriend who is also his friends. Brandon honestly felt Andy deserves time considering they've been together for four years except that mishap two years ago but even then they didn't break up just split for like a week and then got back together.

Andy barely left their apartment. He ordered food, pet Rose their adopted gray pitbull, and listen to music.

David was crashing on Tree's place for about two weeks then he moved to Paul's couch for another two weeks but then he came back to Hayden yesterday. From what Hayden told Brandon he did shit still going to jam, eating talking with people, but definitely angry and sad profusely and smoke a lot.

Hayden, Brandon, and Brent, Definitely want that worried, for starters David still has the majority of the stuff in their apartment. Andy is not exactly making a fuss to get rid of it he felt that if he did it would be honestly over.

"Andy?"

"Yea?"

"I think you should go on a date with this guy I wanna set with you." Brandon said not daring to look from his phone as he felt Andy move on the bed so he could look at his so-called best friend at the moment.

"What?"

"Not like romance or some shit, this dude, got dumped too but I know you- have you ever heard of a sadoff?" Brandon asked.

and he shook his head no, "basically sad people get together and they talk about how sad they are and some feel better, not 100% but like lighter like 'I know that shit happened to everybody but it's nice talking about it with somebody else that it is happening to at this exact moment with me' and if feels different because it's somebody else it's not family or friends. It's like you're sharing with someone in the group therapy or those anonymous meeting you just feel okay to share and it's happening to them at the moment, so it's not past experiences." Brandon explained, He had heard about this from somebody else he never experienced it but it does sound like something he would actually want to try for himself so he wanted to tell Andy.

Andy thought about it for moment, when he was younger yeah did it go therapy and it made him feel better but since then he hasn't gone. He know his families and friends were worried since he was actually doing anything just being sad. Even David's parents called him saying she still loved him and was worried about him, "Yea I wanna try that, and soon before I change my mind."

"okay man, I got you." Brandon smiled and hugged Andy, Andy hugged him back.

After two days since their conversation Andy was going out to a Mexican restaurant called Teotihuacan, Brandon said he was meeting someone called Victor. Andy got out of his car, walked over to the restaurant. He saw someone in a hoodie siting one the bench for looking at him.

"Victor?"

"Yea, Andy?" Victor stood up, And he could tell that the stewards definitely taller than him and possibly Brandon.

"Yea, hi." Andy said extending his right hand to shake Victor's hand. The whole thing was pretty awkward but once they were inside, they order their food, and waited at a table for the waitress to bring it to them.

"You ever done this before?"

"No, but seemed nice."

"Yea same here."

Neither men wanted to start but it had to be done so Victor talked first, "One of us has to talk first."

"Shoot yea so how long you and....." Andy waited for Victor to fill in the blank.

"Jeremy well Juno, we've been dating for like two years, been separated for like two weeks, not talking. You?"

"David, Dating for four, broke up about a month ago, not talking too."

"We're fighting about telling people, not really fans more of family there anything, honestly I thought in the beginning it was the whole interracial thing, but he said he doesn't care while we were yelling at other at the time."

"What do you do?" Andy said taking an interest in Victor's occupation hearing that he has fans too.

"Band, with some friends he is the clean singer, I'm the drummer."

"Nice I'm in a band too, and clean singer as well, Dave is our screamer. We're fighting about trust, basically me not trusting him." Andy shared happily, it made him feel better that he can relate to Victor more.

"Shit why?" Victor asked. They stop talking for a moment when the waitress brought their food they said thank you and continue talking.

"it's just always in the back of my mind, that he'll find somebody else; he can be with somebody else; he will be with somebody else. And it doesn't help that I was right once when he was with some girl, didn't do anything they were just kissing and naked but still."

"You forgave him?"

"Yea, but probably not since he told me while we were breaking up that I basically throw in his face all the time."

"so you didn't forgive him."

"I guess not."

"because if you honestly for gave him, you wouldn't care you wouldn't think about it, so it still hurts, have you guys really talked about it?

"Not really."

"Scared to brake up?"

Andy laughed at that, "It's ironic now." Andy really thought about it for moment he messed up. No wonder Dave broke up with him how you could be with like that, holding a grudge for two years and throwing it in your face. Andy would break up with himself if he could.

" so you're not down would be a secret?"

"No, man feels bad like i'm the fucking problem. Or a fucking disease, I wanna be with someone who doesn't make me feel like that but I love him. I was cool think it was the fans but since we got some popularity and both of our albums so far did well and the third one is still in the works. So I was thinking that maybe it's time but he said no. That's when I started to feel disgusting and started talking to him about and saying why 'why?' 'not?' 'the hell is your problem?' Then he finally tells me it's his family, that's when I got heartbroken I told my family already, I told them last year and I thought he did too because we talked about it and I found out he lied to my face about it and-." Victor stopped talking and wiped his eyes with the back of his hands.

"Your fantasy is shattered." Andy imported.

"Fucking destroyed more like, but I still want to be with him. But I can't make him tell his family I can't tell his family if he doesn't want to. So it's over, but I'm still keeping my stuff at his place, i'm hoping one of my friends could get it." Victor shared.

"He'll tell them." Andy said to reassure Victor.

"what makes you say that?"

"David kept his shit at our apartment and I haven't said anything since I don't want it to be over, I'm hoping he comes one day and we talk, but I'm also scared if we talk because then what happens if he finds out he likes being without me. Juno may tell them, he's scared as shit I bet and doesn't want to but if he didn't end things with you he is looking at the opinion to tell them."

"I think your right, I have to talk to him again and really talk not tell. David, will come back too, Andy. I think you have to talk about what happen even if it's been years."

"Yea I think so too and maybe therapy, I think I need to go back for myself."

"Shot man, congrats on wanting to go."

"Thanks and thanks for meeting for me it didn't suck."

"Yeah it didn't. Thanks for meeting me man, is it cool if I get your number I kinda wanna tell you the aftermath."

"Hell yea man, I wanna see how this story ends." The two men laughed as they finish their meal they continue talking about their music for a little bit but then decided that they needed to go home to think about their next move, they exchange numbers and say goodbye.

Once Andy got home he took care Rose, and started writing about what he wanted to say to David. What he hated about what happened, what if he fears, and what he wants to do from that point. It took him three days but he finally texted David.

To Dave: rose and I miss you. From Dave: I miss rose and you To Dave: come over? From Dave: today? To Dave: whenever you want to From Dave: I wanna come now To Dave: I'm here waitin From Dave: see you soon

Hayden didn't live far from their apartment but it's a surprise how fast David came over.

"Hey." David said once Andy open the door, once he saw David through the peephole.

"Hi, welcome to your own place." Andy said trying to Lighten the air around them letting Dave in.

David hugged Andy as soon as he was inside, Andy hugged back.

"Sorry missed you."

"It's okay I missed you too. Don't kiss me yet." Andy whispered. The couple lack of each other David went to go see Rose on the sofa.

Andy came over to him and set next Dave on the sofa as he was petting Rose, "Dave, I'm sorry for Power been treating you the past two years. And for always throwing in your face, for always accusing you of stuff you haven't done. I'm not over what happened with Allison, we never talked about it and I want to, I really want you to tell me why? Why did you do it?"

"I've been sitting on this for two years, and honestly I don't have a good reason still. I think I made it happen, because i've always dated girls and then I was dating you and I love you, but I think I made myself be with her to see if I would ever go back and it's stupid I know. I don't even know why I did it. I regret it so much that's why I told you what happened, but once you said we could forget about it I wanted to, I was so happy to forget something it. But then you brought it up but you said you didn't wanna talk about it still, but I still feel like shit every time and then two years of feeling like shit. And then you not trusting me is like me being with someone who stabs me." Andy grabed David's other hand, and intertwined their fingers together.

"I'm sorry, I made you feel that way I had no idea. I was selfish about it, taking out my insecurities on you too, and beating you with something that I lied to you and said that I got over when I didn't. I should've talk to you about it so wouldn't escalate into this. You know I have issues with myself and I guess I couldn't handle you loving me either. What regardless of that I shouldn't have attacked you with my issues, I am sorry David, I'm so sorry for making you feel this way, I never want to give you my problems." Andy said, David tired so his body was facing Andy on the sofa, their knees touching in such closeness.

"I'm sorry too, for cheating, and don't be sorry I told you I would be there for you, just like you say you were there for me but, we have to communicate better because honestly I don't want to take breaks from us I love us, I love you." At this point Andy and David were shedding some tears on how emotional this conversation was.

"I don't think I can, honestly it's not because I don't trust you because the fact of the matter is the fact that still want to be with you. If I didn't trust you I would be gone, honestly. I do trust you with me I just don't trust myself to know that you are good, that I picked someone good. I'm thinking of going back to therapy, for myself. I know I need you but you can't just be it. You shouldn't be the only one either." David brought Andy into a hug once again Andy resting his head on David's shoulder

"That's okay Andy, do what you need to I'll support you every step. I'm here I don't want to go any where, if it's not with you."

Andy laughed, "corny."

"You love it, you know you do."

"I love you."

"I love you, too. You can kiss me now." David, didn't had to be told twice to kiss the man he loves.

"Back together?"Andy asked once he pulled back from the kiss.

"Someone has to take you to therapy." Andy smiled that David's response.

The two of them spent the rest of the night in bed, cuddling. Just hold each other for the sake of holding each other.

*two weeks later~sexy time~*

David was back at his apartment with his boyfriend Andy, they thanked Brandon, Brent and Hayden for dealing with them. They bought their friends gifts and went over to their families to reassure them they were good now.

Victor and Juno worked things out. Juno did in fact told his family, and invited them to dinner at his and Victor's place. The older couple even went on a double date, with Andy and David. They had a amazing time together.

Andy has already gone to a session with his therapist. David helped him look for a good one for him. Andy plans and payed to meet with his therapist once a week for six months. Andy was concerned about when he goes back on tour this year, but his therapist reassured him by informing him that he could do online therapy as well with him, when he was on tour.

Andy and David hasn't had sex since they broke up, for the past two weeks they've been very cuddly but haven't gone farther then dry humping. At this point they were both ready to get back on that bed, so they did.

David took Andy's face in his hands and put it to his face and kissed him hard.

"Missed this miss you" Andy said.

David grabbed Andy harder and closer. Desperate and needy. Kissing him deeper. He pushed the Andy down on the bed onto his back. He was grabbing Andy nearly too tight almost as if Andy would disappear if he didn't held on tight. David's body pressed down on Andy's and David moaned in to his mouth as they kissed.

Andy knew David needed him and he needed him too. He missed David's hands running all over his body. Up under his shirt and down his thighs, over the bulge in his pants. David started unbuttoning their jeans and pulling them off and in return the younger man helped David unbuckle his belt and shirts. They were both laying in bed completely exposed to each other feeling secure in their own little world. David went down Andy's body pressing kisses along the way until he was at his legs and pushed in to him slowly while propping himself up with one arm to the bed.

Andy whimpered. "David.. Oh.."

Andy started moving his hips with David.

"Fuck.. Andy. Ahhh..."

David started moving quicker and he was close, "I'm sorry, baby,not lasting long her for you today." breathed out in-between thrusts. Andy grabbed on to David around his neck. Andy's breaths were short and quick and his eyes mostly shut tight but sometimes he looked at his lover.

Their breathing grew quicker and quicker and David's body vibrated with the deep moans. He pushed himself as far as he could in to Andy and moaned his name one last time before they both came at the same time. David got tissue from the side of the bed and clean them both up before laying down next to his boyfriend.

When they had both calmed down and their heartbeats slowed, Andy grabbed on to David tightly. I love you so much, Dave." he said and nestled in to the side of his lover's face. David held on to Andy and whispered sweet things to his boyfriend as they both fell asleep.

The Break up/make up End

Feel free to send me any request of any ship or pairing you want

[arcadeigannon]

what do you think about finnrey?

i love finnrey!!! i don’t stan it but like let’s be real it’s the most likely thing as far as which ship is endgame in canon lmao and it’d still be amazing to have an interracial relationship in such a huge franchise despite the fact that it’s het...and it does have its problems like rey and finn’s first interaction wasn’t great either but overall i love and support them so much

[spunkyspy]

Lol I see ppl asking you all the time, so sorry if it's annoying (haha you can say no) but I was wondering if u could summarize Ika's live (if you watched it!)

Yea sure! I’ll put it under a read more

She talked about relationships bc a lot of people have been asking her for advice. She said long distance requires a lot of trust and if you have trust issues then it’s def not for you lmao

Her and Dem have no trust problems, it’s a total no issue for them. She said it’s never even crossed her mind and she trusts him 100%, and same for him

They don’t have a plan for when they see each other, they’re just like okay we miss each other, I’m gonna come visit. She said they obviously miss each other but they face time and text a lot to make it work

 She talked about being in an interracial relationship too. She said that they don’t really see themselves like that but other people do, like other people see their differences more than they do. 

She said too that at the beginning she was worried about a lot of little things and she even talked to Dre about it in the house since she had dated a white guy before. She said that she doesn’t see any differences anymore and that she feels like she can totally be herself around him. She said their also different too bc he’s from such a small town and she’s Jamaican. 

Karen showed up and she said how much she loves and misses her

Dem was watching too and she told him to go away and pay attention to his class lmao

She explained that her Dad is half Chinese and her Mom is Jamaican. Her Dad owned Chinese fusion restaurants while she was growing up too. She talked about her family, Dad, and sisters a lot. 

She said that some of her family has made ugly comments about her dating a white guy though, but she said they were so stupid that she didn’t even want to repeat them

She said too that they are not a normal couple at all and don’t follow “the book”, she said “We threw the book away” lmaooo. She said that if you looked at them on paper, you wouldn’t think that they would work, but they do. 

She said too that everyone is always like “Where can I find a Demetres?” but that he wasn’t the way he is before her. The boyfriend that he is for her isn’t who he was to his exes and that everyone has to find their own person. She said that when you find that person, they’ll want to be a better person for you. She said she’s the same too, she wasn’t the same with her ex as she is with Dem. She said that she wouldn’t want a boyfriend who did all these things for his ex bc she’d be like “Okay well what were you saving for me” LMAO. She said too that if someone loves you enough then they’ll be the right person and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. 

She laughed at all the people who send her messages saying Dem is gonna cheat on her. She said “What you’re used to isn’t what I’m getting” slfjlksdjf

She said she’s never been loved the way that Dem loves her (that’s?? so sweet??). 

His family and friends have told her that he’s changed/never been like this too. 

She said she doesn’t even post half of the things that he does for her and he’d really do anything for her. She said that he never tells her no if he can help it, like if she wants to go do something, as long as he can he will.

She said that she did go on a few water slides (from the place Dem snapchatted) but not all of them lol

She said that she is leaving Edmonton pretty soon

She’s thinking about doing a youtube channel but would want it to be consistent. 

She said her and Dem cook together a lot

OH LMAO she said Dem helps her with her clip ins

She said that they do everything together when they are together, she said that even this morning, she missed him before he even walked out the door

She said that it bothers her to see other girls who are ashamed of being black and she would never put down other women of color just because she’s dating a white guy and that it bothers her to see other girls do that (im not sure that I worded that right bc I’m paraphrasing but)

She said how much she loves her fan base and how loyal they are, she said, “I could be wrong and y’all would still be like “WELL she’s not wrong! She’s not wrong!” (call me out! LKJFDLKSD) 

She talked about self confidence and self esteem. She said building it up is really hard and that people always tell you to treat other people well but not yourself. She said society portrays people who are depressed etc as weak but it’s important to overcome that because you’ll get lost otherwise. She said too that it’s important to own all your feelings and that Karen helped her with that

She said too that it’s important for her to love herself and be happy because it makes her a better mom. 

Josh stopped by too and she said how much she loves him

She told a story about an older lady that she worked with while she was in college who explained to her that it’s important to be happy and have your own life because when you get older, your kids will have their own lives, and you don’t want to feel depressed and don’t want your kids to feel guilty if they can’t come around, so it’s important to have your own personal life too.

OKAY that’s basically it, I probably missed some stuff but that’s most of it. And I’m sorry it’s SO long but it was like an hour long IG live so