#living Weapons AU

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Pietro: Something we've learned about Awakened Weapons is that they are incapable of reproduction - through organic means, though if a weapon wielded a weapon, there may be a chance-

~Nine Months Later~

Long Memory: *Holding a Baby with platinum blonde hair and blue-green eye*

Crocea Mors: *Crying Tears of Joy*

Pietro: ... I don't understand.

Jaune: *Crying in God-Fatherhood* Mors is a true Arc sir!

[lwde-encrusted-sideblog]

Crocea Mors: Back in my day we didn't get Dust infusions, or Mechashift! We were pure Steel, Grit, and Aura!

Myrtenaster: Oh?Jealous of us new Weapons? Maybe you should get with the times, Mister Antiquated~

Crocea Mors: I'm older than your damn Smithy, and I still hit as hard as I did back in the Great War! I could bend you like the tooth-pick you are!

Myrtenaster: Resorting to Violence so quickly? Must be natural for such an unsophisticated Hunk of scrap like you~

Crocea Mors: *pinning Myrtenaster to the table* I'll show you Unsophisticated, you Twig!

Jaune: CROCE- *Stopped*

Weiss: *Perverted Nosebleed* No ... Let it happen~

Jaune: ... Ew.

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Modern day YouTube au where Xie Lian is infamous on the internet for his catastrophic cooking channel.

[0vergrowngraveyard]

villain au redesigns!!

so far in my efforts to revamp this, they’ve gotten worse! these two need to be separated!

[unfinishedslurs]

The boy stops in his tracks. “I know you,” he says, tilting his head curiously. He’s not tall, but he’s regal nonetheless, dressed all in white. Something about him makes Leia’s hair stand on end, and although she hides it she feels a stirring in her own chest. I know you like I know my own soul, she thinks wildly, and wonders where it came from. Has she gone insane?

“That’s nice,” she says, and shoots him anyway.

He deflects it in a flash of light, a glowing blue laser sword appearing in his hand like magic. She’s only seen one of those before, and it’s Vader’s. If this boy is anything like Vader, she realizes, she’s in deep shit.

She’s smart enough to know when she’s outmatched. Leia makes the tactical decision to run for her life.

Later, as she’s getting the hell out of there, she wonders why he didn’t try to stop her.

She remembers being young and tugging on her mothers skirts, demanding to know why their guest was so sad. “Does he not like it here?” She’d asked, and then, trembling, because Kenobi always seemed saddest around her. “Is it…because of me?”

“Oh, Leia,” her mother sighed, lifting her into her arms. “It’s not that, I promise.”

“Then what is it?”

“Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, years ago.” Breha’s eyes grew deeper, darker. “It was not his fault, but he blames himself. You remind him of that child, that’s all.”

Leia had quieted at that, contemplative.

The next time she’d seen Master Kenobi, she had given him a hug. He didn’t seem to know what to do with that, so she resolved to give him more of them. “He’s lonely,” she’d told her mother. “No one should be lonely.”

Looking at Obi-Wan Kenobi now, the memory seemed so far away. He’d aged thirty years in the ten it had been.

He looks, Leia thinks with a small twinge of regret, very lonely.

“Leia,” he greets. “It’s been a long time.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Leia sees a glint of white.

Kenobi freezes in his tracks. “Luke?” He whispers, and through the distance Leia can hear it as if he’d been speaking directly into her ear.

Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, her mother whispers in her head. He blames himself.

In an instant, Leia understands everything.

Kenobi is still staring at the boy he’d lost so long ago when Vader cuts him down.

Later, as she’s pacing around on the Falcon to Han muttering darkly about Princesses and supernatural abilities, she rememberers the way the boy collapsed, as if all his strings had been cut. Vader was too occupied with him to even look at her as she shot at him desperately.

Luke. She hates him more than she hates herself.

“They know where you are,” he hisses frantically. “They’re coming for you. You have to run.”

“Wait!” Leia quickly pulls up their sonar. Nothing yet, but it would explain the distant queasiness she’d felt since they’d landed. She tended to trust her gut. “How do you know? How much time do we have?”

“Not important, and not enough,” he says. “I have to go, and so do you. You need to leave yesterday.”

“How do I know I can trust you? I don’t even know who you are.”

He pauses. “Call me Skywalker.”

“That’s not an answer, Skywalker.”

“Yes it is.”

She opens her mouth to argue, but there are faint voices on the other end, drawing nearer.

“Shit,” Skywalker mutters. “I have to go. I’ll be in contact, okay? Don’t ever tell me where you are, or where you’re heading. Vader and Palpatine aren’t shy about reading minds. Just leave as soon as you can, and figure out the rest.”

“But—“

It’s too late. The comm has disconnected.

She stares down at it, disbelieving. How would the Empire know they’re here? Why should she trust a stranger who somehow got her personal comm code?

Gut feeling or not, on paper this was a perfect location. Supplied, armored, and most importantly, extremely well hidden. There was no real reason to think it would possibly be found out.

It’s probably a trap. Almost definitely a trap.

Han sticks his head in the door, a sour look on his face. “Hey Princess, can you tell these idiots—“

She makes a decision then and there.

“We’re leaving.”

“What?”

“We’re evacuating, effective immediately.” She pushes past him, and he follows so close he’s nearly stepping on her heel.

“Why? I think it’s pretty cozy here. Actual sunlight doesn’t hurt, either.”

“Apparently too cozy.” She grabs the first person she sees, a pilot who stares at her with wide eyes. “Emergency evacuation. Spread the word to pack everything you can and leave, I’ll let you know where we’re headed when we’re in orbit.”

He salutes and scurries off.

“Woah, hey now.” Han snatches at her elbow until she turns around to face him. “What’s going on?”

“There’s a new informant. He told me the Empire knows we’re here. They’re coming for us.”

“And you trust this person because…”

“I don’t have a choice,” she snaps. Someone runs past them, holding three packs filled to the brim with rations. “It’s either he’s lying and we’re not in danger, or he’s telling the truth and we’re going to die if we don’t listen. It’s not exactly hard math.”

It could be a trap of course, but he hadn’t suggested any sort of direction or destination to follow, and Leia wasn’t inclined to share. Especially not after his tidbit about Vader and Palpatine reading minds.

He squints at her. “That’s not it.”

“What?”

“I don’t believe you,” he insists. He’s so infuriating. Leia doesn’t know why she hasn’t kicked him out yet.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes you do, and you’re either gonna tell me why, or find a different transport when we head out of here.”

“Who said I was riding on your hunk of junk?” She demands. She actually was planning on going with them, since the Falcon has more than enough room for all the supplies that can’t fit in the other ships and none of the trustworthiness of the other pilots, but Han doesn’t need to know that.

“Well?”

Damn him. Damn him for knowing how to read her. She doesn’t know when she let that happen.

“I feel it,” she admits, defeated. “Something tells me he’s trustworthy. We’ll wait and see if it’s right.”

He studies her. She holds her head high, but inside she’s jittery at the scrutiny. They don’t have time for this.

“Yeah, all right,” Han finally says.

“Really?”

“Yes, really.” He rolls his eyes, like she’s not acting absolutely insane by putting all her trust in a random man she’s never even met. “Now come on, Princess, weren’t you the one who said we had to hurry?”

What is it about this man that makes it impossible to tell whether she wants to punch him or drag him into the nearest supply closet? They don’t have time to find out.

“So there’s good news and bad news.”

“Bad news first,” she demands.

“They know there’s a mole.”

“Shit.” Of course they know, how could they not? She should have been more careful, less obvious about the correlation of their movements with the Empire’s plans. “The good news?”

“They’ve tasked me with hunting down this ‘pathetic rebel spy,’” Skywalker says, humor in his voice. “That should buy me some time.”

Leia can’t quite stop the snort she lets out. “Seriously?”

“Yep. You’re speaking to a professional mole-hunter, here.”

“Well congratulations on the promotion, Skywalker.”

“Thank you,” he says grandly. Then, quieter, “It won’t last, Princess. They’ll find out eventually.”

“I know. Just hang in there, it will be over soon.”

“Will it?” He asks, suddenly sounding very young. She realizes that she has no idea how old he is. She doesn’t know anything about the man who has saved them more times than she cared to admit, and the idea rattles her until they sign off.

Later, she looks up the name Skywalker in their archives. There are a few results, but only one sticks out.

Anakin Skywalker, Jedi Knight and hero of the Clone Wars. Killed at the hands of Darth Vader. There are gossip articles too, speculations on his relationship with the pregnant Senator Padmé Amidala, who died around the same time Skywalker did. The baby, it seems, died with her.

Unless he didn’t.

It’s ridiculous. It’s impossible. The idea is so ludicrous that Leia almost rejects it entirely.

But it makes sense. By the Maker, it makes sense.

The child of Anakin Skywalker, it seems, would be a powerful Force user indeed. Powerful enough for Kenobi to take the baby and run. Powerful enough for the Emperor to want him for his own gain. Powerful enough to send Vader after Kenobi and take the boy himself.

Maybe even powerful enough to shield his mind from Vader and Palpatine’s intrusions.

Powerful enough to hide the fact that he’s a spy.

Leia sinks into her chair, covering her face as she laughs.

Maybe Luke isn’t so bad after all.

“No, no, no,” she mutters, digging through the smoking wreckage of the TIE fighter. “Don’t be dead, please don’t be dead.”

“Princess…” Han lays a hand on her shoulder that she immediately shrugs off.

“No, he’s not dead. He’s not. Luke!”

A faint cough answers her, and she’s so relieved to hear it she could cry. Behind her, Han starts bellowing for a medic and, “Some damn help here, do you expect us to move all this ourselves?”

“Luke, it’s me,” she sobs. “It’s Leia. You’re at the Rebel Base. You’re safe.”

More coughing, and there’s a worrying rasp to his voice when he says, “You know…my name?”

“I figured it out.”

“Smart.” This time, the coughing is so bad Leia and Han both wince.

“Shit, kid,” Han says, moving another piece of rubble. “Don’t talk. We’re gonna get you out of here, all right?”

“Stand back,” Luke chokes out.

“What?”

“Stand back. Please.”

Han protests, but something in Leia knows they should listen to him. She drags him back, and motions everyone else to fall back with them. They do, albeit reluctantly.

“Clear,” she calls, hoping Luke can hear her.

The TIE explodes.

“Fuck!” Han goes back in, Leia on his heels with the terrifying feeling that she’d just allowed Luke to die, before they both stop in their tracks. Around them, the broken pieces of the TIE are floating.

And curled up in the middle is a man dressed all in white.

“Luke!” She pushes past Han to start dragging him out, and after another moment of staring around them, he helps her.

As soon as they get clear, the pieces fall to the ground with a clatter. Luke falls limp with them.

Han is still looking at the TIE. “Can you do that?” He asks quietly.

Leia pauses her examination of the unconscious man in front of her to glare at him. “Is that what you’re most concerned with right now? Really?”

“Excuse me for asking, Princess!”

“It’s white,” Luke grumbles, pulling at his hospital gown bitterly. “I hate wearing white.”

“Should I be offended?”

He rolls his eyes. “Don’t even. You look great and you know it. I just feel like I never left.”

“Well,” she says gingerly. “I guess it’s a good thing you got sick of it. If we went around in matching outfits all the time, people might think we’re twins.”

He snorts. “Yeah, right.”

[megamindsupremacy]

Drifting Stars headcanon where Mabel and Ford use the "we're father/daughter" story so often to avoid suspicion that Mabel calls him "Dad" instead of "Grunkle Ford" now.

Ford has a reasonable amount of emotions about this and does not nearly cry the first time Mabel calls him "Dad" outside of lying to people.

[kosssich]

whoa! Big post! Scary! But still, please check it out! It has pictures :)

So before I continue my papa Adam staff and sisters exorcists I want to settle some of my headcanons on them + heaven in general (including some redesigns)

Birds of prey AU

How were exorcists created.

- Hell was growing. So was its power. Heaven began to feel threatened by Lilith and her kingdom.

- So they decided they needed protection. Seraphims wanted to create an invincible army to protect the citizens of Spheres. Army that would consist of utterly loyal soldiers.

- Exorcists were created in the likeness of birds of prey - beautiful, vicious and smart.

- Exorcist weren’t exactly a heavenborns. Technically, they were never born. They were created. But still, they’re not robots. Actually, all of them have personalities. Their own wishes, dreams and thoughts. But one thing they have - never doubt Heaven and orders. Never doubt Adam. They can question a lot of stuff in their lives, but never Heaven.

- They don’t have compassion, they don’t show mercy. They are supposed to be baby soldiers.

- Magic of Lilith can slip through Pearly Gates. And one of the newfound army was affected by that. One of the nestlings - so different from others - was created with a curse and a blessing - it was given the free will. A will to question, a will to show compassion, a will to seek knowledge and a will to have soul.

- Sera and Adam had their doubts about Vaggie, but decided to keep her, so the only thing left was to keep an eye on the broken child, preventing her from turning against Heaven.

Exorcists species.

For exorcists were created in the likeness of birds of prey, they vary from each other.

They have their own strengths and weaknesses. Their wings are different as well, they may look alike, but they function differently.

There’s only three exorcists who have different necklaces from the others - Vaggie, Lute and the killed one, so I decided to go with this number three.

I chose these three different orders of birds of prey:

1. Falconiformes - different species of falcons - really fast, agile, perfect eyesight.

2. Accipitriformes - hawks and eagles - strong, fast, vicious, perfect eyesight.

3. Strigiformes - owls - not as fast as other birds, but they can fly completely silent, perfect assassins, agile, perfect eyesight and perfect hearing as well.

No Cariamiformes, because they can’t fly, sorry birdies 😔

Vaggie is the only specie of Tytonidae, just to prove how different she is.

Other exorcists belonging to owls is species from Strigidae family.

- I have a headcanon, that Heaven is very technically advanced (we saw a glimpses of Heaven architecture and they had this cool looking microchips on the floor, LED masks, cool stuff). Whatever Vox is doing, Heaven is steps ahead. So I wanted to recreate this headcanon in exorcists redesign (don’t get me wrong, I like the original design, I do get that they supposed to look like demons with their horns, all grey and black, and like crusaders with this chain mail, yeah yeah yeah, but I like birds more).

- So, the exorcists army divided into three squads - hawks and eagles under Lute’s command, owls under Vaggie’s command and falcons under Dead exorcist command. And Adam is Harpy Eagle - the largest eagle and one of the kind.

- Exorcist are used for service in Heaven - babysitting, escorts to the other Spheres, guards, it’s not like Heaven needs guards, but my imagination ends here lol. It’s just, not like they need to train all 365 days a year.

- Winners know about exorcists, but not about the extermination. They know Hell and its threat, so Heaven never hides the information about its army.

- Exorcists can be killed and they know that. But they still act like they’re invincible, because in some way, they really are.

- An exorcist can be killed in two ways:

1. By other angels with angelic steel.

2. By sinners and hellborns with angelic steel.

3. But the difficulty - to kill an angel you need to rip off their halo. If the sinner or a hellborn touches a halo, they will just burn alive, killed by holy flames. (They tried to kill exorcists, didn’t work). Exorcists always fly. They never step on Hells ground. Always in the sky, deadly and unpredictable.

- They’re not stupid. They don’t leave their weapon in dead bodies. They don’t need sinners to have angelic steel. But still, steel can be gathered from arrows and bullets mostly - it’s a hard and dirty work to dig through all the bodies just to find a few bullets. This is exactly why Carmine’s angelic weapon is insanely expensive and difficult to get.

[miusato]

Ken, it's too early to give yourself a mid life crisis and worry too much 🙃

[sashimew-the-cat]

Teenage mutant COWBOY turtles?!?

(Click for better quality, solo versions under cut.)

[latenightwestern]

“We could be like Batman and Robin!”

but what if he actually took him up on that offer

bonus:

[howlsofbloodhounds]

do yall get me when I say killer doesnt keep cats or any animals as pets

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Myrtenaster: Oh Crocea~ Would you kindly carry me to Mistress Weiss~?

Crocea Mors: No. Your legs work. Carry yourself.

Long Memory: My Dear Mors, I ache deeply, for the energy I store runs my body ragged. Be so kind as to take me to Mr. Pine?

Crocea Mors: *Blushing* Yes Ma'am. I- I can do that!

Myrtenaster: *Angry Multi Action Dust Rapier Noises*

Oscar: *Disturbed Silence*

Jaune: *Confused Silence*

Weiss: *Disappointed Silence*

If I made a ship Canon, it'd be LM and CM. Old people (Weapons) Need love to!

[lwde-encrusted-sideblog]

Ruby: So ... Crocea Mors and Long Memory?

Jaune: I refuse to acknowledge it.

Oscar: ... I'm ... Happy? For them?

Ruby: You just wish they were less handsy in public?

O+J: YES.

Nora: ... They're so old, I bet Backshots sound like the Skeletons from Minecraft.

Jaune: I wish I never learned it doesn't.

Oscar: Why are they so loud?

[llondonfog]

LET LIVING WEAPON SILVER AU OUT PLZZZZPLZPZLLZKZPZLZLZLZLZLZLZLZPZLZPZLZPKZPZKZLZLZPZLZLZLZLXLX

Your writing is amazing, I love ur mind. And I need more (only if u feel like it ofcrs :))))))

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH?????? i can't believe that au broke through twst containment and into the whump community, this is such an honor aisdj;fl

while i don't have a drabble queued up for the moment, i didn't want to leave you hanging after such a sweet comment so please enjoy the brief snippet below :)

He can smell them first.

The scent of man sprawls over the wind and across the hilltop, a thick miasma bloated with sweat and iron and greed. The trees themselves shiver as if to shy away from the approaching bloodlust, and there's a foreboding silence that speaks to the absence of the woodland creatures who have long since scrambled or burrowed their way to safety.

Behind the snarling, grotesque mask situated half over his face, Lilia wrinkles his nose and squeezes the leather-wrapped grip reflexively, the stench one that will follow and haunt his dreams.

In the recesses of his mind, a gentle pressure flickers in reassurance, as calm and as steady as the stars above.

There is no doubt in his mind of the outcome— as the General of the Right, the Running Rampart of the Verdurous Moor, he has not and will not fail his Queen in battle. However, his thoughts drift to the blade clutched tightly in his hand, a strength of possessiveness he never would have believed himself capable of expressing towards a mere weapon, and a realization centers itself in his mind as if it had simply always been at home there— he would not fail Silver either.

Ahead of him, the first of the soldiers breaches the forest crest, the glimmer of the moon glinting off the peak of a battle-worn helmet.

Without a second thought, he lifts the sword with ease, pressing his exposed lips to the brilliant auroral gem laid into the pommel, to the soul trapped inside.

"The Night's Blessing be upon you," he breathes, and for a moment, only a moment— a fragile, delicate drop of time— he could swear there are arms around him, lips warm and benevolent to his temple as his own words echo back to him on the breeze.

The soldiers descend.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

I’ve returned from my sketchbook quest , and here’s a drawing for dauntless-daffodil , who came up with the idea for the spear baby au.

THEM HAS COOKIE!!! ;A; <3 <3 <3 <3 SMOL WITH COOKIE!!!

AWWWWWW~

oh gods looking at that cute little innocent face i can just FEEEEEEL baby spear watching as chaggie and the hotel all stand around them hotly debating What Food Is Even Healthy For A Baby Spear Spawn Child To Be Eating

Charlie: "A cookie??"

Angel Dust: "They don' need cookies, ya useless gays, they need milk!"

Charlie: "We had cookies in the hotel??"

Vaggie: "Why would they need milk? They've got teeth already! Fangs, even!"

Angel Dust: "That ain't how nutrition an' shit WORKS toots!"

Niffty: (shakes jar full of money) "SWEAR JAR!"

Angel Dust: "Fuck. Shit." (hands over three dollars)

Charlie: "Since when are there cookies in the hotel that I don't know know about???"

Cherri: "If they've got fangs and like chewing stuff, maybe they need meat or something?"

Niffty: "OR BLOOD!!!"

Vaggie: "We are NOT-"

Angel Dust: "Ain't no baby under my watch gettin' fed steaks and BLOOD!"

Charlie: "Where did the cookie even COME from?!"

Husk: (coughs)

Charlie: "Husk! You gave them-?"

Husk: "....bar's always got snacks. And they were just. Staring at me."

Angel Dust: "Husky noooooo....!"

Vaggie: "How? I did a double sweep for undeclared cookies just two days ago- you KNOW what Charlie does to your bar if she goes snack hunting in the middle of night and actually finds something. She's like an adorable cookie gremlin."

Charlie: "Heheh!"

Husk: "Yeah well, she's not the only one allowed to like f- fffffffudging cookies. And your kid seems to take after her, so whatever."

Angel Dust: "Baby cat, that's no reason ta- oh for cryin' out loud, now what Vaggot?"

Vaggie: "...what? I didn't say anything."

Charlie: "Vaggieee, you're smiling~"

Vaggie: "Huh?"

Husk: "Like a dumb... dumb."

Niffty: "Beaming! Grinning! AS WIDE AS A SLIT THROAT-"

Cherri: "-fuck fuck fuck, shit shit, damn crap hell- here, take my money and don't fucking talk like THAT in front of the kid either, what the fuck."

Angel Dust: "Sickening."

Niffty: "Thanks!"

Angel Dust: "I meant Darth Vaggie getting all googey eye'd over her an' Charlie chip having a kid."

Charlie: "Oh so you think they're my kid too, huh?"

Angel Dust: "Are ya gonna let Vaggie raise 'em without ya?"

Charlie: "No~pe~!!!"

Angel Dust: "Then congrats on parenthood ta both of ya, it's already going to hell."

Vaggie: "Okay, uh-"

Husk: "You're gonna fffffeathering cry again."

Vaggie: "-no I'm not, I'm just glad the... my kid isn't still crying. Our kid. They, really are pretty happy with the cookie aren't they?"

Charlie: "Of course they are! It's CHOCOLATE CHIP!!"

Angel Dust: "It's not. Baby food."

Charlie: "It is if it's my baby, and they get milk to go with the cookie!"

Angel Dust: "V-gal, stop her! Use ya dang mom veto!!"

Vaggie: "Eh. Charlie was a hellborn kid and she grew up fine. I trust her."

Charlie: "AWww!!!"

Angel Dust: "Unbelievable."

Husk: "Whipped."

Vaggie: "Yeah? My kid didn't even have to say anything to get a cookie out of you, fluff boy."

Cherri: "Uh, guys.... gays...?"

Husk: "What."

Charlie & Vaggie: "What?"

Angel Dust: "Both and speaking, baby."

Cherri: "Where did..... the baby go...?"

Hotel crew: "....."

Place where baby was: (empty except for crumbs)

Spear Baby: (gone)

Vaggie: (wings bristling) "The-"

Charlie: "OUR!"

Vaggie: "Our-"

Demon Charlie: "-BABY!?"

Niffty: "MOTHER OF FUCK." (throws down swear jar) (tries throwing herself onto the broken shards but angel dust and husk grab her)

-meanwhile, elsewhere in the hotel-

Alastor: (walking quickly)

Spear Baby: (crawling after him)

Alastor: "....shoo."

Spear Baby: "Guh!"

Alastor: (nervous sweating) (walks FASTER)

[blood-injections]

Band au be upon ye

Give it up for THE CONVENTIONAL WEAPONS

Kobra Kid- Vocals!!!!!

Party Poison- Bass

Jet Star- Guitar

Fun Ghoul- Drums