#little india series
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steakout-05 · 11 months ago
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//ableism mention tw
ok just gonna say something really quick: i absolutely hate Abe's characterisation in the reboot of Clone High because it is nothing like how he acted in season 1 and it just. isn't funny. they've turned this good-intentioned but flawed loser kid who just wants to be like the original Abraham Lincoln but doesn't know how to, into a self-centered and arrogant asshole who literally almost said a horrible ableist slur twice in the first episode. like. i'm being serious, he almost says the R-slur twice in the same minute and i dunno about you but i really don't find it very funny when a) the only "joke" behind it is "oh look at how bad Abe is compared to the more progressive sensitivities of the new generation of clones, isn't he just terrible", and b) they felt the need to completely rewrite a pre-existing character that fans are already attached to to do something against his own morals for the sake of a shitty joke, and c) TOPHER WAS RIGHT THERE!!! isn't he supposed to be the asshole or am i missing something?? like...
i'm not saying you can't have "edgy" or "dark" comedy or whatever, but personally, i don't find it very funny when a character that actually means quite a lot to me and is one of my favourites is twisted and rewritten into an arrogant asshole in an apparent attempt to appeal to the people who hate Abe for his flaws in the original show. especially when he's rewritten to be someone who would say a slur that's literally been used against my fellow disabled peers, myself included. it just feels... wrong. it actually hurts a lot to see a character i once loved and found to be one of the funniest and most important characters in the show be turned into an arrogant dick, with barely any thought or meaning put into him. i don't like what they did with the rest of the OG cast as well (such as Joan making a complete 180 in her entire character, JFK's character assassination, the removal of Gandhi, Cleo barely being in it etc.), but to me, they did Abe the dirtiest in this season and i'm really disappointed that one of my favourite shows had to continue like this :(
#clone high#abe lincoln#rant#sorry this post is a little heavier than what i usually post on here but i just felt like i really needed to say this#abe from clone high is actually quite an important character to me and i'm still upset that he's been written so poorly in season 2#like he's a silly parody of a teen drama protag but honestly i think his struggles in the original series are actually really meaningful#like he's a little shy and doesn't exactly know how to express his ideas in the best way but wants to help and i just think that's so real#especially as someone who struggles with that myself#he has so much pressure to live up to the OG abraham lincoln and he really wants to be like him and tries but doesn't get it#i mean he even says something like that in episode 2 when joan and gandhi come to see him in his room and that's really relatable#so to see him so horribly misinterpreted as a selfish asshole really hurts me.#they've essentially done the thing where a fandom will tear apart the neurodivergent coded character#and write them off as selfish and arrogant and completely misinterpret everything about them#not saying that Abe is written to be neurodivergent but you get my point#it's kinda like that#he's relatable to me as an autistic person and a lot of his struggles are similar to what the autistic community experiences#also i'm sad that gandhi had to get removed because he's important to me too#he's actually one of my favourite ADHD reps on tv i've seen and he's just really funny#i know he was removed because people in India got offended and they probably don't wanna cause another incident like that again#but still it's such a shame he couldn't be included because he was a great character#also slightly unrelated but i think turning characters into a moral debate it stupid and often results in stuff like this happening#ableism mention#tw ableism mention
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demigod-of-the-agni · 7 months ago
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hi babes !!!
FCBD is coming up and Marvel Voices #1 is going to drop on 5 May!!!! So do me a favour and SPAM SPIDEY EMAIL!!!!! Support your blorbos AND the little guy of all time Pavitr Prabhakar..... yes I will pay you in requests......... !!!! no i am totally not bribing you !!!!! <333
[email protected] and then slap "letter for spider-man india" or something similar in the email subject, please and thank you
So it turns out we ARE getting a Pavitr story for Free Comic Book Day and all I am thinking right now is damn, they really brought back the same writer and artist for this mini story..
Don’t be shy let me have a go 😁
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hobiebrownismygod · 1 year ago
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Why Spiderman-India/Pavitr Prabhakar is one of the best examples of Indian representation I've seen in a long time
Mumbattan
Lets talk about Earth-50101, Mumbattan, Pavitr's home dimension. Mumbattan is displayed as a beautiful, colorful dimension with lots of traffic, lots of people, and lots of culture. When we see Gwen, Miles and Pav swinging through Mumbattan, we see people wearing saris, people driving scootys, Indian-style billboards and even temples in the surroundings. This is an extremely accurate depiction of large Indian cities.
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Mumbattan on the left, Mumbai on the right
See how similar these look?
Now compare this to how Hollywood's Slumdog Millionaire movie depicts India.
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Every single movie depicting India made by Hollywood portrays India as a country full of slums and dirty people. I have never seen Hollywood portray India as the beautiful, culture-filled country it is, and I have never seen one of the many beautiful temples, or the advanced cities represented in western media until now. Slumdog Millionaire is a fantastic movie, but India isn't only made up of slums.
Hollywood tends to romanticize struggle and when depicting India, makes it seem like a very depressing country. Yes, there are slums in India. Yes, there are people struggling in India. But that doesn't mean that India isn't beautiful. It doesn't mean India is behind. Mumbattan is the first depiction of India I've seen that I feel portrays the beauty and culture of India well. It is a fantastic representation.
2. Pavitr's personality
One of the most recent and most popular Indian representation series right now is the show, Never Have I Ever. In my opinion, this show is terrible. The main character, Devi Vishwakumar, is the stereotype of all stereotypes and doesn't accurately portray most Desi girls. She is rude, selfish, and extremely narcissistic. Her entire personality is being Indian and I find that extremely hard to watch. They make fun of her by addressing stereotypes like an excess of body hair, fashion, and even accents but instead of shutting down these stereotypes, they amplified them by making fun of them.
In western media, Indians are either portrayed as IT workers, scammers, grocery store owners, or nerdy, try-hard teenagers. Every show with an Indian teenager in it portrays them as cheap, unhygienic or unattractive which I, as an Indian, find extremely offensive.
Pavitr is portrayed as an optimistic Indian teenager who's smart and strong, without bragging about it, proud of being Indian without making it his whole personality and genuinely funny. He isn't portrayed as some skinny, nerdy guy with glasses. In fact, he's literally shown flexing his muscles, and performing well in class without going overboard about it. He's so full of culture, I can't even begin to explain it because I'll never stop. His suit, his mask, his webs, the way he moves, the way he fights, its all beautiful and I could watch for days on end without getting bored.
We were finally served an attractive, funny Indian character who isn't a walking stereotype, who loves and embraces his culture and just seems like an awesome guy to be around. Seeing him on screen made me feel so proud, of my religion and my culture. I hope Hollywood takes notes on this and continues providing the media with proper Indian representation and strong Indian role models for characters!
This article explains everything I said a little better, because I know my writing style can be confusing sometimes. It really goes into depth on how impactful it is on Indians to see this kind of representation for the first time in western media and how important this is.
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He's so pretty <3 I'm so proud that I look like him
Might go even more in-depth eventually, I just really wanted to get this off my chest because I love him so much 😭
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madridfangirl · 6 months ago
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Star crossed lovers (Jude Bellingham fanfic)
Chapter 1
(Series Link)
Jude * female reader. No warnings.
Synopsis: A chance encounter in a tiny Madrid cafe with the newest superstar of her fav club. The two couldn't be more different, yet both feel the pull toward the other. Would this girl be the one he finally falls for? Would she make him change his ways? Even though she resists him every step of the way, would he fight all odds (& her) to have her in his life? Or would life come in the way of these star-crossed lovers?
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……………………………………
Madrid was such a beautiful city. Ananya had been here for nearly four months now, yet couldn’t stop marvelling almost daily over some or the other detail she kept discovering. She loved the hustle bustle but also the quaint historical aesthetic that the city provided. That way, it was quite similar to Delhi, the city she was from.
She was practically in a different continent now, far far away from India. To move to another country, with a completely different language and culture, while she was just 20, had been a tough choice. But she was offered a great job in her undergraduate college placements and no career-minded adult would say no to such an opportunity. So, she had managed to convince her overprotective parents to let her move to Madrid, on her own. Her parents thought she would want to return in a few months itself, but she surprised even her own self with how well she was adjusting to the city. Madrid was beautiful, after all.
As she sat in a sweet little cafe on the side of a small road, close to her office in downtown Madrid, on a Friday evening, she smiled to herself on how the last few months had transpired. So much had changed in her life, and she was loving the ride she was on. An independent girl, with a decently fancy job in one of the best European cities. Life was good right now.
This tiny cafe was one of her favourite spots in the city. It was run by an older couple who always greeted her with a smile and the best churros in the galaxy. It was never too crowded, most people just took takeouts. So it was an ideal place to relax, and it was walking distance from her office.
She pulled out her laptop while munching on her plate of churros. It was already Friday evening but she still had a few hours of work left. Investment banking was fun but the hours came with it. Mr. Iglesias (the owner) quietly placed a cup of cappuccino, her usual, next to her plate. She smiled gleefully at his hospitality, then engrossed herself in her work.
30 minutes later, a distinct baritone and accent broke her out of her reverie.
‘A Spanish omelette please?’
Ananya turned around, drawn to the voice. A tall man, wearing stylish all black attire, was standing at the counter. She could only see his back.
Mr. Iglesias drew a blank expression. The tall man tried again.
‘Umm, an omelette, Spanish omelette, por favor?’
‘Un tortilla de patatas, senor.’
Mr. Iglesias nodded happily at the man and signalled 10 mins with his hands.
The man whipped his head in her direction, and smiled gratefully at her.
She had to look away. Immediately. Not just because he had the most infectious smile in the world. But because she recognised who it was and she absolutely would die if she acted crazy at this instant. No, she willed to not make a fool of herself.
But he was walking over to her now.
‘Hey, thanks a ton for that.’
She had taken a few deep breaths by now and was back to her typical poise.
‘No problem at all. I could see you were struggling there.’
He hung his head and laughed sheepishly.
‘I did learn what it was called in Spanish, I swear. But had a long day and completely blanked out. Umm, Spanish is not my first language you see. But I am learning.’
Despite the situation, she somehow managed to smile back genuinely at how he was trying to explain himself to a complete stranger.
‘Well, I am new to the city and the language as well. But my favourite dishes are something I never forget. Can’t go without those, right?’
He smiled at her again. A smile that lit up his whole face. A smile that could light up a black hole. She was amazed at how real, how normal he came across. He was wearing his cap backwards and had glasses on to serve as some disguise she supposed, but she doubted whether those would generally be of any help to him. Not anymore at least.
He played with the back of the chair opposite hers, and looked around.
‘Umm, are you alone? May I join you?’
She channelled all her inner poise before answering.
‘Yeah sure.’
And he flashed her another joyful smile while settling on the small table, opposite her. Man could charge 1000 euros for each smile and people would line up to pay.
He removed the godforsaken glasses, unveiling his big, coffee brown eyes. The hat he just turned backwards, which somehow suited his chiseled face even more.
‘You said you are not from here. May I ask where you are from?’
‘Sure, I am from India.’
‘Wow. I have heard so much about that place. Some of my neighbors back home are also from India. Would love to visit sometime.’
‘You should. There are many flavours to India which you could only experience when you visit.’
He nodded along, agreeing with her wholeheartedly. Mr. Iglesias waved to him from the counter, signalling 5 mins more. He smiled at him as well. Was that his default setting? Not that she was complaining. Oh hell, no.
He suddenly looked back at her.
‘Hey, I didn’t catch your name. So silly of me to not ask earlier.’
She found herself smiling again.
‘Ananya.’
‘A-nan-ya?’
He tried to break down the foreign sounding name in syllables. It was her turn to giggle now, and he rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.
‘Not A as in Ancelloti but A as in Alvaro Morata.’
He leaned back in his chair, still rubbing the back of his head, and looked straight into her eyes.
‘So, you do know who I am?’
She tuned her laptop towards him. The screensaver was her in the trophy room at the Bernabeu, along with the 14 Champions League trophies.
He looked at the photo and her beaming smile. Her love for the club was evident.
‘Been a Madridista since 2009. 15 years. That’s 75% of my life. So yes, I do know who you are Jude.’
Somehow, just somehow she had managed to find her footing amidst all this madness and was having what would appear to be a fairly normal conversation with a global superstar. She felt it was because of him, though. Because how easygoing and grounded he seemed.
‘Wow. That’s awesome. You know, I didn’t even like football at that age? It’s strange, I know. My dad always wondered what was wrong with me. But one day, suddenly, I decided I wanted to play.’
‘I get it. Sometimes god acts in mysterious ways. You won’t even know how or when, it just happens.’
‘I know right.’
They fell into a comfortable silence. Just looking at each other. And smiling. Both couldn’t stop smiling for some reason.
Mr. Iglesias appeared then with the omelette and Jude nearly hugged him in delight.
He stuffed his face with a gigantic bite, moaning at the taste. Then, he ended up coughing vigorously because the bite was almost one third of his plate.
‘Easy. Here, take this.’
Ananya offered her glass of water to him, which he gulped down in three sips. Then rubbed his mouth with the back of his hand as he looked back into her eyes.
‘My mom had once gotten me an omelette from this place. Felt like little drops of heaven. Since then I have been meaning to have this. Sorry for the clumsiness, I got a little carried away.’
He was apologising to her again, which was so endearing. And that accent made everything sound twice as cute.
They went back to their food, and the comfortable silence was back. But she was learning that he couldn’t stay silent for long.
‘Since you already have a head start in knowing about me, would you tell me something about you? What brings you to Madrid?’
‘I work at an investment bank here. Kind of my dream job and my dream firm.’
He leaned forward, tapping his fingers on the table.
‘Ooooh fancy.’
‘Yeah right. Look who is talking.’
‘No, it is fancy. Seems like a smart person thing. I had a feeling you were like that.’
He spent the next 15 mins learning about her job, and by the end he accused her of showing off by using big terms he won’t understand. She neither confirmed nor denied that accusation.
He took another mouthful again, completely ignoring what happened the last time. She couldn’t help but be amused at his antics.
‘So, have you seen any match live?’
Her whole demeanour changed and she was practically bouncing off the chair now. He found that extremely amusing.
‘Oh yes. I was here for internship last year and I managed to watch one game. Vini scored two kickass goals and we won. It was amazing - easily one of the best days of my life.’
‘Um-hmm.’
Something in his tone was off but she was too happy to care.
‘Is he…your favourite player, then?’
‘Oh he’s amazing. Us fans have seen him since he was 17 I guess? And look at the journey. Love the player he has become. But my favourite will only ever be one. I am a Ronaldo fan girl.’
Well, that seemed to cheer him up. He kind of figured that given she had mentioned 2009.
He watched her face fondly for a few seconds as she turned nostalgic and relived the memories in her head.
‘Nothing this season, then?’
‘No luck. The tickets are always sold out. Last year also it was our firm which arranged them for us.’
‘Hmm.’
She hadn’t seen him play, then.
He went back to his last bite and turned it around with his fork a few times, pondering over his next words.
‘Well, there is a home game tomorrow.’
‘A HOME GAME? It’s the first Classico of the season. Ofcourse I know that. God I am so nervous. Hated them winning the league last year. Hate their guts. Jude, you guys better win tomorrow, please. ’
He watched her keenly though her rant, thoroughly amused.
‘Thanks for the order. But, what I meant was, do you want to watch the game tomorrow?
‘But, Classicos get sold out in the beginning of the season right?
She looked confused. Still not getting the point. He realised he would have to spell it out for her.
So smart in her work but not as much in this, which was cute in its own way.
‘Ananya, do you want to watch the match tomorrow from my box? Because you are welcome to do that.’
Oh. Oh.
She stayed still, and he scanned her face for a response.
A volcano erupted inside her. She had been so lost in talking about Madrid and that match that she had completely missed the way he had been looking at her. And what he had asked her just now.
He could tell from her face that something deep was holding her back.
‘Listen, bring your friends / colleagues if you want to. Many of my friends have attended. Plus the boxes are all next to each other so the media / fans can’t really tell who is in whose box, if that’s what’s concerning you. You can just attend as a friend, that’s it.’
She wasn’t buying the last line.
‘That’s it?’
She called his bluff while meeting his gaze. Which he admired. The smart girl was back.
‘Well, after the match, we could grab a bite maybe? Doesn’t have to be a public place, don’t need that drama. So maybe, your place? Or….mine?’
She shook her head sadly.
‘Jude…it’s not that you are not…but…we live in very different worlds and…’
He had an inkling of what was coming and he cut her off before she could finish the sentence. Taking no for an answer was not an acceptable option right now, not when the last 30 mins had been so pleasant and refreshing.
‘What if I score tomorrow? Against the team you detest? How about then?’
She looked at him with her mouth half open. Which made him look down to her lips. But he had the good sense to quickly revert to her eyes.
‘Won’t you want to give me some extra motivation to score against Barca? Or would you rather I be sad and distracted tomorrow?’
She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. He was really doubling down on this.
‘Let me get this straight. You are seriously using my love for Real Madrid to get me to go out with you?’
He leaned back in his chair, smirked that gorgeous smirk, and shrugged casually, with an iota of arrogance, knowing he was going to win this. Even the arrogance suited him, for crying out loud.
But then, he leaned forward and covered her hand with his, expression all sincere. Her breath hitched at his touch.
‘Look. I just want to spend some time with you, and I really would love for you to see me play. I get that my lifestyle comes with a zillion challenges but that’s step 10. Can we please just spend a few hours together, just you and me, where we talk and get to know each other? I promise, that’s all I am asking. And you don’t have to say yes to that now. You can decide tomorrow after the match. How does that sound?’
The earnestness in his silky smooth voice was drawing her in. She believed him, and was on the verge of saying yes.
But he got restless and played his final card, which he always had up his sleeve.
‘Also, Zidane is going to be there. Their box is just two rows down from where you would be.’
She burst out laughing and threw the table napkin in his face, which he caught easily. Then flashed her a million dollar smile.
‘You really are something aren’t you?’
‘Well, I try.’
She had forgotten that his hand was still on top of hers and was reminded of it when he squeezed it briefly, then withdrew it.
He pulled out his phone and slid it in front of her.
‘Gonna need your number to send the passes.’
Her mind was still registering what she had agreed to but her body reacted involuntarily and typed in her number.
He saved it quickly and sent over the passes in seconds.
‘So, I will see you tomorrow then?’
‘Yes. You leave me no choice. And you better win now, after what you just pulled.’
His phone chimed with a reminder then, for an evening home fitness session prior to the match. He had to leave, she could tell.
He stood up, and she got reminded of how tall he was. His lean physique made him look even taller.
He reached out for her hand again, shaking it this time. And lingered for a few seconds.
‘I will have to go thank my mom now for recommending this place.’
He chuckled, while finally getting go of her hand. She couldn’t stop admiring how his eyes crinkled when he smiled.
‘Can I drop you home?’
‘I have some work to finish - you carry on.’
‘Ok. Looks like it’s gonna rain tonight so pls leave soon.’
Gosh, could this guy get any more charming?
‘Yeah, I will.’
Grudgingly, he went towards the door of the small cafe but looked back one final time.
‘Ananya - such a beautiful name.’
He said it perfectly this time and she gave him a hearty smile, exactly what he needed before he made his way out.
She fell back in her chair, buried her face in her hands and tried to make sense of what had just happened. Tomorrow was going to be nuts. She was going to see Zidane, who she loved to bits. She was gonna watch El Classico. And then, if Jude had his way, she was going to go out on a date with him.
………………………………………………………..
Author’s note: This is set in October and pls assume the classicos were reversed :)
Lots more to come, hope you liked the setup.
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cheriecelestial · 7 months ago
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Batboys as Desi Films
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𝐃𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐬𝐨𝐧
Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge (1995)
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Raj and Simran meet during a trip across Europe and end up getting stranded in the middle of nowhere after they miss their train. Despite their initial clashing, they fall in love. However, Simran’s traditional father has arranged her marriage elsewhere. Raj must win over Simran’s family to marry her, leading to a series of heartfelt moments, comedic misunderstandings, and ultimately, a dramatic climax where love conquers all as the couple fights for their happiness against societal norms.
Dick is so raj coded with his quips and charisma. Their chaotic banter and chemistry is off the charts. Any Indian who hasn’t watched this gets their desi card revoked immediately, I don’t make the rules. This movies fits Dick’s dramatic flair perfectly.
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𝐉𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐓𝐨𝐝𝐝
Goliyon ki Raasleela Ram-Leela (2013)
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The modern adaptation of William Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet,” set in rural Gujarat, India. It follows the love story of Ram, from the Rajadi clan and Leela, from the Sanera clan, who belong to rival gangster clans engaged in a long-standing feud. Despite the enmity between their families, Ram and Leela fall deeply in love, leading to a tragic and tumultuous journey filled with passion, violence, and sacrifice.
It fits Jason’s love for guns and classics. An absolute visual treat with cinematography and all the songs are absolute bangers.
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𝐓𝐢𝐦 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐞
Jab We Met (2007)
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Aditya, a heartbroken business tycoon, someone who was dwelling in the lowest ebb of his life and was almost on the brink of giving it all up, aimlessly boards a train to escape his depressing life. On his journey he meets Geet, a talkative and vivacious young woman. Geet is on her way to meet her boyfriend, but her plans go awry, and she ends up stranded. Aditya, feeling sorry for her, decides to help her get to her destination safely. Along the way, they encounter various adventures and challenges that bring them closer together. Despite their contrasting personalities, they develop a deep connection. However, when they part ways, Aditya realizes his love for Geet and sets out to find her. In the end, they reunite, realizing they are meant to be together.
Grumpy x sunshine. The OG green flag. Epitome of ‘if he wanted to,he would’. Makes my chatterbox heart happy because of how much I relate to the FL. Favourite comfort movie of all time. ML kinda looks like Cillian Murphy’s scarecrow. “I like you a lot but that is my problem, you don’t need to worry about it.” Their fights and his little sassy comebacks and rants were so cute and fun to watch.
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𝐃𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐖𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞
Jodhaa Akbar (2003)
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The Mughal emperor Akbar, seeking to forge political alliances, marries Jodhaa, a Rajput princess. Initially a marriage of convenience, their relationship evolves as they learn to respect and love each other. Jodhaa struggles to adapt to Mughal customs, especially with their cultural and religious differences but her courage and integrity win Akbar's admiration. Despite conspiracies and opposition, including from Akbar's own court, their love prevails. The film explores the transformation of a young ruler, initially groomed for ruthlessness by his mentor Bairam Khan, into a wise and compassionate emperor who values mercy, diplomacy, religious harmony and cultural acceptance. Akbar's realization of the importance of religious tolerance, showcased through his abolition of discriminatory policies and his respect for all faiths.
The arranged marriage tag and the ‘raised as a weapon but softens and shows more compassion out of respect and love for his empress’ tag fits demonhead!Damian so much. The way he said mashallah after he pulled off her veil in the middle of a sword fight >>>>. I love how it captures the essence of India’s rich heritage and diversity. “Why seek paradise ? It is before me now.”
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𝐁𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐖𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞
Khoobsurat (2014)
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Milli, a free-spirited and eccentric young woman becomes the physiotherapist for a royal family. She brings her lively yet clumsy personality into the conservative royal household, shaking up their structured lives. It clashes with the formal atmosphere of the palace, especially with the stern matriarch, Nirmala Devi. Despite initial resistance, Milli's unconventional methods bring joy and laughter into the lives of the family members, including the brooding prince, Vikram. As Milli navigates the challenges of fitting into the royal household, she also finds herself falling in love with Vikram, leading to a series of comedic and heartwarming moments.
Very cliched (well it is a Disney film) and the second hand embarrassment is unreal but sometimes after a long day all you need is a feel-good cheesy rom-com. Oh to sit next to Fawad Khan in a red convertible while gazing lovingly at him. I like how she emphasises on improving the patient’s mental health to help him heal. Incase you haven’t noticed already, cold brooding™️ x silly goose is my favourite character dynamic.
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𝐀/𝐍 - I’ll be honest with y��all, this was to satiate my desire of writing x desi! reader cuz I don’t have enough motivation or time to do it T^T
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agroteraa · 7 months ago
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I Wanna Be Your Dog
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Oliver Quick x f!Reader
My fic masterlist
Summary: Oliver's memories of one of the evenings at Oxford, where you began getting closer. And a night in Saltburn, where you try to be dominant with him.
Actaeon series spin-off, taking place between Artemis and The Wrath of the Stag.
Warnings: smut, dom!Reader, sub!Oliver, switching, oral, penetration sex.
Word Count: 2,8K
It was another spring party at Oxford. All the young people were chatting cheerfully with bottles and glasses in their hands in the slightly dim light of the dormitory's common room. Felix and Oliver were almost lying relaxed on the couch and had been silent for some time.
“Now, can you eenie, meenie India or Annabel, and take one fucking home? Because they look miserable,” Oliver suggested softly.
“Eenie, meenie, miny, moe. Catch a tiger by his toe. If he squeals, let him go. Er..." Felix seemingly forgot the text of the counting-out rhyme, but decided to finish it as soon as possible and make a choice anyway, "You're out, boy scout!"
The choice fell on Annabelle. He happily pecked Oliver on the cheek in gratitude, which made him grin widely. Oliver liked being praised. Especially by those who were important to him. Felix quickly jumped up from the sofa and, lightly slapping the contented girl on the ass, and went off with her upstairs.
“Well, what the fuck, mate? I’ve been chirpsing her for about an hour. I wanted at least a hand job...” the guy Annabelle left said in disappointment.
An hour. What did he know about waiting. How about almost a whole year, mate? Oliver smiled indulgently to himself. And anyway, how shallow that guy thoughts and desires were.
“I know. We all want a fucking handjob, mate. Get yourself a title and a massive fuck off castle.”
That where it was hard to argue. A title and a massive fuck off castle had never harmed anyone in life yet.
"Hey, here I am! And where is Felix?.." you were surprised when you returned from your dorm room and sat back down on the sofa, only this time next to Oliver alone.
"I don't know really," he shrugged, smiling, "I think he’s decided to go have some fun on his own."
"Hmm," you pursed your lips, not really surprised, but still, deep down, a little upset that Felix was acting like that again. You guessed where and why he might have gone, but decided not to focus on that thought right now. Besides, you'd already poured another bottle of your drink into yourself. There was some silence in the air. Before that, you had fun talking to the guys, mostly Felix, and you had never been alone with Oliver for long, especially at parties. You clenched your bottle tightly like a social lifebuoy.
Oliver was even beginning to interest you a little, just a little, but you still had no idea what and how to talk to him in private. He still seemed more like Felix's shadow. But at the same time, being face-to-face for at least a short time, you felt like you had to tell Oliver something meaningful, something deep... as if you should be giving away to him some of your secrets. You were vaguely disturbed by this feeling, as now you were just in the mood for small talk only.
"Um... so… how’s your study going?" you asked, not knowing where else to start a new separate conversation with him besides studying.
"Pretty well," he replied a little awkwardly, embarrassed by your close presence himself. Before that, Felix separated you on the couch, but now he wasn’t a bother anymore. Oliver definitely liked this intimacy, even though he was obviously not used to it yet. But one gets used to the fine things quickly. And Oliver was greedy for all the new truly fine things in his life.
"And yours?"
"Yeah, too," you took a small sip from the bottle, trying not to look him in the eye. At the same time, because you felt awkward and because these blue eyes have been looking at you so piercingly lately, as if they were drilling right into your soul. You couldn't tell if it was embarrassing for you, or if it was some other kind of excitement. Maybe both.
"And what about yours..." Oliver was interrupted by one of Felix's many friends, Chad, who plopped down on the arm of the sofa next to you.
"Hey, Y/N! I finally got to the party on your campus! How are you?"
"Oh, Chad! It's been a long time, it’s like you've disappeared somewhere. Have you really been studying so hard lately?" you both laughed loudly at this very bold assumption of yours. You continued to communicate, actively exchanging the latest news. Over time, you felt guilty a little. You turned to Oliver and smiled at him. He smiled back understandingly. His face visibly saddened when you turned back to the blond guy. He began to examine the empty bottom of his plastic cup, twirling it slightly in his hands. How should he get Y/N's attention? He didn't know. He had to come up with a plan. What would he do, what should he say, so that you…
"Hey, Oliver! Did you have any classes with Mr. Wharton?" you asked with interest, involving him in your conversation. He exhaled a little as he realized that you weren't leaving him in the middle of this party, where he felt like a stranger without Felix and you. You looked at him with a warm smile, and something inside him finally clicked and fell into place.
"Er, yeah... that oddball. He constantly comes up with fruit analogies for everything and even sometimes speaks on their behalf while holding them in hands."
"Ah, have you seen that too?! Y/N, I told you, he's an old weirdo! Only you are attending the wrong classes!" exclaimed Chad, and you all laughed merrily. The conversation was going well, and Oliver was incredibly happy about it. He didn't feel lonely anymore because of you.
But in return, some feelings that he had only vaguely suspected until this moment began to awaken inside him. You didn't stop drinking, and at some point, Chad put his arm around you and started lightly stroking your back. You giggled without giving it much thought, especially under the influence of alcohol. But Oliver saw perfectly well how Chad looked more and more into your eyes, lowering his gaze to your lips and lightly licking his own. It was very subtle, but Quick noticed it all. The way his hand keeps stroking your back, gripping you tighter and tighter. Oliver saw it all perfectly well, because he wanted to be in that place himself.
No, rather, he didn't really want to. He had long imagined your first kiss when you were fully conscious, willing and not under the influence of some alcohol, when you were too much mellow-minded. And he wouldn't let your kiss with Chad happen now, in this state, nor ever.
Sometimes it seemed you and him were very different. He could see through everything, and sometimes it was like you notice none of what you really should. How could you not understand that this Chad wanted to take you upstairs just like Felix did with Annabel?
You were kind and open, maybe even too friendly, oh, Y/N. Oliver was drawn to you like a moth to a fire. You were quite a complete and content person in your own right, and this was very attractive to the many-faced Oliver, who was still struggling to find a place in this life, especially here, in his first year at Oxford.
And it seems that he began to realize that he had found his place next to you. And he wanted to take this place like a guard dog, protecting it and you from all the adversity and guys like Chad.
You didn't forget about Oliver and wanted him to feel fine and less lonely, even hardly knowing him, even having so many friends and acquaintances here, even in the midst of fun of the party. You showed towards him attention and care.
Yeah, he would like to be your dog, he thought now.
Fortunately, you got up soon, freeing yourself from Chad's embrace and going to the bathroom. Great. Oliver had been carefully observing the situation in the common room all this time, so he immediately got up from the sofa and sauntered into the common kitchen, where India was smoking, still slightly displeased that Felix had not chosen her.
"How’s the party? " Oliver asked politely, grabbing a can of beer from the fridge.
India rolled her eyes, twirling a cigarette in her fingers, "What do you need?"
"Me? Nothing. But that guy has been looking at you half the evening without stopping," he nodded towards Chad and winked, "Just saying."
"Isn't he hanging out with Y/N?"
"No, he doesn't sleep with his buddy Felix's old friends. So, the way is clear."
"Oh, are they friends with Felix?" India narrowed her eyes. That was good, she needed some male attention right now, especially from those whom Catton Jr. might become jealous of. Thus, the girl went off towards her chance.
When you had returned to the common room, you saw Chad and India flirting with each other on the couch, and the girl did not let go of her hands off him. Okay. That was unexpected, but okay, it was a student party, after all. You shrugged your shoulders and started thinking about where you could sit now.
"Everyone seems to be having fun with each other tonight," Oliver, who happened to be next to you, shrugged sympathetically. Indeed, everyone around was busy with their own lively conversations, and someone was already far from just "talking".
"To singles?" he offered a playful toast, and you agreed with a grin, "Apparently so!"
"Cheers!" you clinked your drinks, continuing to talk a little more relaxed with each other. So, that how you started getting closer from that evening, and you began getting to know the real Oliver. At least that was what you thought at the time. He looked at you with a shy smile of a complete adoration as you were telling your stories full of joy and tipsy giggling. His eyes were shining like two starry sapphires at that moment.
If a guard dog wants to protect the peace of its owner and scare away other dogs, then it must inspire fear itself. Maybe sometimes not very intentionally, but instill just a little fear and sense of power even to its own master. Oliver wanted to be a good guard dog.
He would take this place next to you.
* * *
And he took it.
Now he was hovering over you, pinning you between his arms, leaning on your bed in your bedroom in Saltburn. It was the middle of the night, and finally not a single one inhabitant of this house could bother you right now.
Oliver thought all day about how he would continue his way with you at night, along the way remembering the evening of that party in Oxford, where you finally began to get closer. He looked down at you rapturously, biting his lip and breathing heavily, still not believing that all this was really happening. Not just right now, but in general, everything.
His blue eyes were gleaming with utter delight in the dim.
"What else does my sweet Y/N want?" Oliver asked you, recovering his breathing.
He bent lower, and a chain dangled from his neck, swaying slightly. The metal heated by the warmth of your bodies tickled your lips slightly. You lifted your head and gently but firmly catching the chain with your lips.
"Mm-hmm," Quick mumbled with curiosity. You smiled, gritting the chain with your teeth and began to shake it slightly from side to side. He opened his lips excitedly, inhaling sharply.
"Am I your doggie today? Oh, I'm more than willing to be, sweetheart," he said in his deep sexy accent.
He wanted to add "now and always," but didn't. Oliver was afraid that if he showed how willing he was to obey you, he would lose your interest. He was used to changing masks, adapting to different situations and someone's needs. He was an awkward and shy nerd when you first met, and that was largely true, because of his deep core nature and the new posh environment at Oxford. Fortunately, he had successfully joined Felix's company and was able to relax a little. And here in Saltburn, he almost felt like the master of the situation.
If you wished, he would always be that sweet, shy and awkward guy for you, if only you were truly happy about it. But he had learned that he interested and intrigued you mostly when he showed a more powerful, dominant and somewhat even dark part of himself. And that made him really pleased, because you viewed him the way he hoped to be in his own deep wildest dreams.
And yet, he still wanted to be your dog, an obedient dog who would do anything for you. In a sense, he was. And today he decided to demonstrate you that in more obvious way.
"What do you want me to do? I'm all yours," he leaned back next to you, belly up. Oliver smiled playfully. Right now, he was a tiger who had been caught by the toe with his own permission.
Biting your lip, you straddled him, sitting on his thighs. After enjoying this view, you ran your hand from his navel, sliding your fingers up the groove between his prominent muscles. Oliver exhaled sharply. You stopped at his neck, grabbed his chain, and pulled him to you. Now the guy was in a sitting position, he looked at you adoringly while his hands slid over your waist.
Without letting go of one hand from the chain, you slowly rose and began to descend on his cock. Oliver hissed with satisfaction, "Yes, my dear, just like that..."
"I didn't let you talk," you pulled the chain slightly, smiling slightly.
"Oh," he said in surprise, but gladly began to obey you, nodding in agreement.
You began to move slowly on his things, while Oliver's strong hands supported you with ease, guiding you, leaving hot prints on your skin.
His hands were all over you as his lips feverishly kissed everything they could reach. Finally, he reached for your lips, covering them with a hot kiss full of saliva, admiration and arousal.
When you broke the kiss, you said, a little hesitantly, but still firmly enough, "Take your hands off, next time you touch me when I tell you."
Oliver smiled enthusiastically – you learned quickly from his example, apparently. He liked the hint of his own power and dominance reflected on himself now through you.
He obeyed your request, although it was getting harder to fulfill it by every passing minute. He wanted to touch you again, guide your body and push it harder on his hard needy cock. It became unbearable after a while, and he whined a little. He looked at you a little pleadingly, but you nodded no.
He kissed your breasts again, but in response he got "Do not touch at all."
"Only I can now," with these words, you ruffled his hair and pressed harder against his shoulders. He groaned at the inability to touch you at all, it was a new sensation, or rather, its absence.
You grabbed his hair, and he put his head closer, burying it in your hand. It was the only chance to touch you in any way. Oliver closed his eyes and inhaled noisily through his nose. He didn't even mind if you squeezed his hair even harder, hell, maybe even poked his face into the sheet, where he would inhale the scent of your arousal. If you had forced him to lick it off, he would have willingly obeyed, as long as you continued to press his face to the bed, clutching his dark curls. He even imagined doing the same with the bathtub you were lying in lately. In his bathroom. This thought turned Oliver on even more.
Degrading him, talking him down, pulling his hair or chain harshly - he would not always like to be in this role, but he would like to give you that opportunity from time to time. If only you'd asked. And even if you hadn't asked. Because it was you. And because he was like that.
Reaching the peak almost at the same time, you dug your nails into his back deeply, which made Oliver's eyes darken slightly and starry at the same time. With a pleased moan, you released your grip and sank down onto the pillows. But that wasn't all of it, and you decided to play the role given to you to the very end.
Clutching his soft dark hair, you moved his head to your thighs. He looked back at you with hazy from own rapture eyes.
"Please," you said softly, still not being able to be dominant enough. But this sweetness and dissimilarity from his own, even in a situation where you could and should do it, but asking instead, drove Oliver crazy to his limit. He attacked you with a growl, delivering all the pleasure he could possibly give to you that night.
* * *
Oliver was lying with his arms around your lower back, his head resting on your stomach. Quick looked faithfully into your eyes. His face reflected the moonlight of the deep quiet night that was now in Saltburn.
You stroked and scratched him behind the ear, he rubbed his nose contentedly against your smooth belly skin.
"Is my mistress happy?"
"Yes," you laughed, starting to play softly with his hair.
"Then I am happy too," he said, closing his eyes and rubbing his cheek against your soft belly, "Now and always."
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sosuigeneris · 8 months ago
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Socialite series: Manufacturing your Personality
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So you want to get into high society. I can give you a guideline as to how you can do that. 
I was born in high society, in India. I know how these systems work. Even across cultures, they’re quite similar. I know some German, Asian, American high society people. Certain things are very similar across continents. 
You can permanently secure your position by two ways: marriage, or by becoming somebody. 
In Indian high society, there’s two kinds of people: those who have lineage, and those who are rich. 
Those who have lineage are those (mostly bankrupt) Maharajas, artists, singers, musicians, poets for generations - it’s an art form or royalty handed down to their children. They have ✨culture, a legacy✨ that can only be obtained by birth. They want to mingle with the business rich so that they get access to the opportunities they need for their livelihoods. 
The business rich can be new or old money. It doesn’t matter. Their businesses are family businesses. They have money, but may lack class. Don’t be mistaken that only new money can be “tacky” - I know plenty of influential, old money families who are equally classless and tacky. 
They want to mingle with the lineage crowd because they need that ✨culture✨ to be seen as someone. They want to be associated with them, to improve their reputations. By connecting to the artistic and musical world, it shows that they have class and persona. 
Both groups, as you see, need each other. You may ask - can’t there be families where there’s both?
Yes there can. But that is not common. 
Let’s say you take the route of dating someone who is of high society, and are hoping to convert that into marriage. I’ll be very honest with you - you have to seriously stand out for Asian and Middle Eastern high society families to accept you if you lack both lineage and money. 
You need to have a strong educational background - you need to go to a great college or masters, or whatever - otherwise this is really not going to happen. This is requirement number 1. If you don’t have this, don’t even bother reading the rest. 
And in Asian and ME families, remember one thing. Marriages are between families, NOT individuals. You have to impress the family, the family’s friends, their maids and barbers and god knows who else. 
And here are Cherry’s insider tips, just for you, to fit right in. If you fit in comfortably, it makes your life and everyone else’s life easier. 
Extrovert tendencies 
don’t be intimidated by people, don’t be shy or awkward 
It’s better to mix in being a combination of “social + slightly bored” like “it’s nice to meet you, but I wouldn’t die to be here.” 
Be open without jumping around like a Disney kid. Being “overexcited” or jumpy, smiling and laughing at just about everything comes across as weird in some cultures, IF that’s not how you genuinely are. That might work in the US, but not everywhere else. 
If I had to very simply define an extrovert - approach new people with ease, learn the art of small talk and be a good listener. 
Confident 
have a sense of self: career, hobbies, likes or dislikes, experiences
Be a multi faceted person. Do things that YOU like. If you like reading Japanese literature and collecting quartz, great! That’s your thing! 
Good communication skills
articulate, small talk abilities, good listener, curious, engaging
be able to tell little stories about yourself without giving everything away 
Well dressed 
do an image consultation for your colours, understand your body shape type and find a style that works for you
Create a capsule wardrobe that is timeless 
Remember - modesty is ALWAYS the best idea for any event. 
Posture - stand up straight, be able to walk in heels, sit without slouching
if you don’t know how to walk in heels, learn to. Practice it. 
Sit up straight, do some yoga or something for good posture 
Maintenance- good skin, hair, fit body, skin, nails, teeth; good hygiene; smell good 
hygiene comes first. Shower regularly, wash your hair as often as needed. 
Put on perfume. 
Find a make up style that works for you. Again, this takes practice. It took me years to figure out what kind of eyeliner works on my eyes and that bronzer doesn’t suit me at all. Crazy make up, unnatural hair colours, visible tattoos or piercings will not sit well in these societies. 
Etiquette 
dining etiquette- learn how to eat properly. This is not just for white culture but for other cultures as well. Understand broadly how popular cultures etiquettes work - Japanese eating etiquettes, European fork and knife etiquette, Korean drinking etiquette, Indian and Middle Eastern etiquette, etc. 
giving appropriate gifts to the host - bottle of wine or flowers 
Learn thank you etiquette- shoot a text message to the host thanking them for the event 
Intelligence
Show that you have some sort of a personality. 
Stay updated with current affairs
know your line of work and the relevant people (top companies, CEOs, etc), trends happening in your industry 
Be open to learning new things  
Put together
have a routine, show some form of discipline. 
This can be done by committing to something long term, such as healthy habits - exercise, reading, waking up early. 
Keep a watch on what you say 
people, especially women, who come across as bratty are seen as a big no no and can come across as exhausting and blood sucking. Zip it. 
Don’t talk about your failures, vulnerabilities, mistakes or mishaps. That’s confidential. 
Don’t complain or be snotty or a potty mouth. 
Do not put other people down in front of people who are not your absolute close friends. 
Poise (this is for your mental health and wellbeing)
Don’t be over eager. Being overly friendly can be seen as submissiveness. 
You’re overly friendly with someone because you want to be accepted by them. Acceptance only happens when you’re familiar with one another. When you become too familiar, it becomes a breeding ground for disrespect. Boundaries get crossed easily. 
Body language
practice practice and practice. 
Video yourself and have a fake conversation with someone. Or maybe FaceTime a friend and record yourself and see how you react to things. 
I used to watch those “try not to laugh/ get angry/ cry” videos to maintain a strong facial expression at all times. Not everyone deserves to see you vulnerable. 
Social media 
Take. Shit. Down. 
Go private if you don’t make money of social media. You’re perceived as more mysterious if you’re a private account. 
Remember, even if you’re private, it doesn’t mean that your pictures aren’t being shared. Someone’s taken a screenshot at some point for SURE or shown your account to someone else. Don’t give anyone anything to talk about. 
Don’t upload every second of every day. 
Don’t upload anything questionable- your break ups, your new boyfriend, girls nights, clubbing, your latest shopping spree etc etc. Keep things halal. Think of it this way - if your boss were to see those photos, how would you feel?
Overexposing yourself on social media comes across as desperate for attention. Limit that.
Cherry 🍒
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dear-ao3 · 2 months ago
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bucket here
I’d just like to note that the instant I sent the ask I started writing in the hopes you would say yes and I like actually squeaked I was so happy when you did and also I’ve been writing nonstop since then so bear with me:
*takes deep breath* Safety restrictions were famously lax in F1 until the 1990s. The deaths of Roland Ratzenberger and Ayrton Senna within days of each other at the 1994 Imola GP sparked a huge movement for new safety systems, especially barrier changes. As Senna and Ratzenburger both died in accidents related to the fact that the safety barriers at the edges of tracks were just CEMENT WALLS, this was a huge push for many teams, drivers, and tracks. No one wanted the death of more legends on their hands. These accidents also inspired additions like headrests in 1996 and the HANS system (head and neck support), put in place in 2003. HANS can be seen when drivers get out of the car — it’s that space-age looking neck brace/strap on their shoulders and helmet.
Some safety systems that are much less talked about are things like the accelerometer, first used in 2014 and placed in the drivers ear. This measures the forces during impacts, and its location in the ear allows both for less invasive placement and accurate data on head/neck movement for drivers. This then leads to better safety systems capable of being studied, reasoned for, and implemented. The addition in 2016 of a camera that faces the driver also allows for safety teams to see exactly how the driver is affected during crashes, as well as giving fans a fun camera angle (which I can rant about as well, camera angles in F1 are a huge thing for me). 
Rapid fire safety systems (there will be a quiz):
Helmets were first introduced in 1952, but not required until 1977.
Seatbelts/racing harnesses required starting 1972.
Fireproof race suits have been required since 1975.
The safety car didn’t even exist until 1993 (trial runs in 1992, first seen in 1973 Canadian GP)
Pit lane speed limit introduced in 1994. Yes, before this they just ripped through as fast as they could; no, the pit crews didn’t stand any further away.
Wheel tethers introduced in 1999 after an unholy amount of incidents going back to pre-1950 (AKA official F1 start) where the wheels just came off and smacked drivers, marshals, and fans, usually killing them instantly.
The most notable safety system recently is the Halo and VSC (virtual safety car). The halo was put in place in 2018 and will hopefully never leave. It has been the savior of hundreds of lives throughout Formula series, but most well known in Formula 1 were Lewis Hamilton (2021 Monza GP, stopped Max Verstappen's car from becoming a permanent fixture in the side of his head) and Romain Grosjean (2020 Bahrain GP, pushed the crash fencing up away from his head as he hit the barriers), as well as possibly Zhou Guanyu (2022 British GP, flipped upside down and up over tire barriers into catch fencing) and Max Verstappen (2021 British GP, incredibly hard hit into a tire barrier — 51G impact at 160 MPH/257 KPH). 
There had been a number of close calls that brought up the possibility of halos, like Fernando Alonso almost having his head removed from this world at Spa in 2012 on lap one, and an incident between Michael Schumacher and Vitantonio Luizzi at Abu Dhabi in 2010 that left Luizzi’s Force India inches from Schumacher’s face.
Unfortunately, it took the horrific death of Jules Bianchi in 2014 at the Japanese GP and a number of junior driver fatalities for the Halo to be finally seriously considered and implimented. Bianchi’s incident also led to the Virtual Safety car, which was put in place in 2015 to keep accidents like his from happening. I can talk more about his incident as well if you’d like. It’s a masterpiece of administrative fuck ups and terrible oversights.
(Ask me about it and camera angles I dare you)
HELLO BUCKET
this is wonderful thank u thank u
i did know a little about the senna crash (tho not the concrete barriers) (i do know that when it happened they were trying to revive the drivers union which is awful) and the bianchi crash (i looked at that quite extensively for update post) but Yeesh yeah the safety stuff is Terrifying. pls. pls tell me about the camera angles.
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the-apocrypha · 3 months ago
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anything related to dream's german accent from "the fourth dimension"? I've been obsessed with that little detail since you first posted that fic ❤️
OMG yes. The original fic, for reference. Also, asking for a friend, does 800 words count as short?
They stand in perfect silence on the forest path, Dream’s phone balanced in the palm of his hand as it records. The sound of the bird's song is made into an aesthetically pleasing series of bars on a line, on the app, and below it an hourglass spins as the song is compared to millions of other stored bird calls around the world.
Pacific wren appears first.
Below it, reed warbler.
Then, at last—sedge wren.
“It must be,” Dream murmurs. He loses patience and pulls the phone back toward himself, tapping at it. “These other two are not native species, they would not be—no. Pacific. And… India. It must be the sedge wren, there is—” He taps some more, and then a recorded bird call plays from the phone. “Yes?”
Dream is looking at Hob.
It sounds the same to Hob, but then, Hob has long proven that he has neither the senses nor the temperament for birding. Why Dream insists on consulting him at these turns is an ongoing mystery.
“Definitely,” Hob says.
Dream's nose scrunches.
"Definitely not?" Hob tries.
“If only—” Dream's brows draw together as he abandons the phone to squint into the bushes where the birdsong has been coming from. The binoculars come up, and then back down again. The squint gains agitation.
There is contention, amongst the birding community, about what constitutes a “rare bird spotting”. Some people hold that the bird must be seen, while others will settle for call identification only. This is to say nothing of the debate regarding rare birds unintentionally captured in the background of photographs, noticed days or weeks later.
“Show yourself,” Dream mutters, with a scowl fit to light the brush on fire.
Hob has a little gander about the path while he waits, like an airplane in a holding pattern. Further down the trail, there’s supposed to be a boardwalk over a wetland that he suspects will take at least an hour to traverse for all the birds expected to be nested there. He’s brought a book for that particular layover. It’s even not in English, at Dream’s insistence that Inkheart was best enjoyed in its original text, and also of an appropriate reading level for Hob’s current faculty with the German language.
He takes a picture, as he waits, of Dream with binoculars to the sky. It matches the other thousand of them on his phone. Binoculars at the beach. Binoculars at the park. Binoculars out the train window.
Eventually, Dream’s shoulders slump, and he lets the binoculars drop. He pockets his phone.
The bird song has gone.
“Sorry, love,” Hob offers, with a consoling hand between Dream’s shoulderblades.
“Such are the trials of ornithology,” Dream sighs.
“There’ll be other birds,” Hob tells him, and with gentle pressure, he gets Dream’s feet moving down the path again. “Maybe you’ll get that, uh, gargagney you wanted instead.”
“Garganey.”
“S’what I said.”
Dream trudges down the path.
They make it approximately a hundred feet before Dream’s head suddenly snaps up, and he has the binoculars up as quick as a flash.
A second later, Hob is unceremoniously yanked closer.
“Look!” Dream hisses, shoving binoculars in front of Hob’s eyes. “Look, look, up there, third branch from the top, just to the right, it’s a peewit.”
“A what.”
The sound of fingers on glass patters away as Hob takes approximately an eon to find the little bird that Dream had somehow spotted out of the corner of his eye perched fifty feet up a tree.
“It is not actually called a peewit,” Hob says.
Dream ignores him.
Hob shakes his head, and lowers the binoculars to watch Dream race through the Merlin menu to find the peewit's dedicated page. He holds out the binoculars in preparation, and sure enough, thirty seconds later Dream snatches them up to verify his identification.
Hob returns to his holding pattern.
“Hey,” he says, at length. “Is that the peewit’s call?”
Dream looks up from his phone. “Mm?”
Hob gestures at thin air. “That?”
There’s a wok wok wok wok wok wok wok overhead.
Dream shakes his head, and returns to his phone. “A squirrel, Hob.” Only, of course, they are speaking German and so it is Eichhörnchen.
“A what?” Hob asks, suppressing a grin.
“Ein Eichhörnchen,” Dream repeats. He glances up briefly.
Hob’s pretend expression of confusion passes muster.
“A squirrel,” Dream translates impatiently, and then switches back to the binoculars.
One of Hob’s greatest sorrows in life is that Dream has learned to minimize his accented English over the last few years. It had been Hob Gatling, and vhatches and seh Dhreaming, every word just a little bit imperfect and all the more wonderful for it. Now, it is only when Dream’s focus slips that Hob is allowed these little gifts from him.
Skuurl.
Hob turns into another holding pattern, and grins to himself.
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queereads-bracket · 2 months ago
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Queer Fantasy Books Bracket: Round 2
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Book summaries below:
The Burning Kingdoms series (The Jasmine Throne, The Oleander Sword, The Lotus Empire) by Tasha Suri
Author of Empire of Sand and Realm of Ash Tasha Suri's The Jasmine Throne, beginning a new trilogy set in a world inspired by the history and epics of India, in which a captive princess and a maidservant in possession of forbidden magic become unlikely allies on a dark journey to save their empire from the princess's traitor brother. Imprisoned by her dictator brother, Malini spends her days in isolation in the Hirana: an ancient temple that was once the source of the powerful, magical deathless waters — but is now little more than a decaying ruin. Priya is a maidservant, one among several who make the treacherous journey to the top of the Hirana every night to clean Malini’s chambers. She is happy to be an anonymous drudge, so long as it keeps anyone from guessing the dangerous secret she hides. But when Malini accidentally bears witness to Priya’s true nature, their destinies become irrevocably tangled. One is a vengeful princess seeking to depose her brother from his throne. The other is a priestess seeking to find her family. Together, they will change the fate of an empire. Fantasy, epic fantasy, politics, romance, adult, secondary world, series
The Hands of the Emperor (The Hands of the Emperor, At the Feet of the Sun, and other stories) by Victoria Goddard
An impulsive word can start a war. A timely word can stop one. A simple act of friendship can change the course of history. Cliopher Mdang is the personal secretary of the Last Emperor of Astandalas, the Lord of Rising Stars, the Lord Magus of Zunidh, the Sun-on-Earth, the god. He has spent more time with the Emperor of Astandalas than any other person. He has never once touched his lord. He has never called him by name. He has never initiated a conversation. One day Cliopher invites the Sun-on-Earth home to the proverbially remote Vangavaye-ve for a holiday. The mere invitation could have seen Cliopher executed for blasphemy. The acceptance upends the world. Fantasy, secondary world, politics, romance, adult, secondary world, series
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franklyimissparis · 9 months ago
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hi there can i ask what are your favourite fics??
ahhhhhh this was so hard to narrow down since i think i have something like 300 beatles fics bookmarked on ao3 (plus a ton saved from livejournal but i’ve only included ao3 ones here). at first i was gonna pick a top 5 or top 10 but that was too hard so here are my top 24-ish i think? could have picked a lot more tbh. i only included fics that are completed, even though there are a lot i love that are either WIP or abandoned. also didn’t include any modern AUs though there’s a lot of those that i love as well! if anyone has any specific requests for other fic reqs i’m always happy to suggest more :)
on our way back home by kathleenishereagain
this fic has the most kudos in the fandom for a reason! old paul time travels back to the touring days and his relationship with john changes from there. love the way they integrated the magical realism into this and it’s just such a beautiful, touching story.
knowing that the sun is there by tarenas
john comes out after brian dies. lovely look at john’s individual relationships with all of the beatles and cynthia (but especially his relationship with paul of course)
cutting water with a knife by savageandwise
may’s perspective on john and paul. love love love. heartbreakingly realistic and so poignant. feels like it could have been a cut chapter out of loving john.
i’m so tired, my mind is set on you by dornfelder
god how i wish this is what would have happened in india. i’ve read this fic so many times, it just feels so real i keep coming back to it.
india, actually by inspiteallthedanger
jane notices that john’s india tapes are all of paul a la love actually. love jane in this and paul and john’s dynamic is great.
grow old with me by inherownwrite
john and paul in scotland in the 80s - paul breaks his arm and gives john a fright. such a tender picture of what could have been had things not ended how they did.
i was a younger man then (now) (post hoc) by fingersfallingupwards
using the time traveller’s wife premise in quite literally the best way i have ever read. the way it unfolds is…. stunning.
having coffee by dornfelder
old paul and john reflecting on life and being outed in the 80s through an interview. lovely.
to lead a better life by downtothelastdrop
1966 ringo mistakenly thinks john and paul are together, leading to a revelation of paul’s own.
going nowhere by inspiteallthedanger
fix-it where after surviving the shooting, john moves back to england.
if i could choose my own name, it’d be the one that falls best from your lips by kandakicksass
one of my favourite reincarnation fics ever. i really enjoyed how simple it was, how the pieces just slid into place so naturally.
the birthday party by merseydreams
everyone reunites for ringo’s 40th in july 1980. an excellent look at the dynamic between all the bugs and how things could have gone.
something old something new by inspiteallthedanger
john shows up to pattie and eric’s wedding causing a beatles reunion for the first time in years and some shenanigans and talks with paul. this fic is hilarious and THIS is my george, i love him so much
1967 by please_dont_wake_me
paul and john stay in paris after their 1961 trip. they return to liverpool in 1967 as a couple. this feels so real, the way every minor character is written… the dynamics between them all - every detail is excellent.
the beatles holiday au series by econhomework
an AU that follows john and paul (and george/ringo) being a committed couple in the 60s/70s and having their children via surrogacy. i’ve been subscribed to this series for years now and it’s a lot of fun getting an update that builds upon the last around every holiday, giving a little snippet into their lives as the kids grow up chronologically. (they also have other fics set in this AU in their beatles fic requests series)
the brother dearest series by javelinbk
jim and mimi get married, causing john and paul to become step-brothers (sort of). interesting premise and an even better execution of it. not to mention the idea of jim and mimi getting together will never fail to make me laugh (but also sort of makes a lot of sense???)
how much was mine to keep by mynamesbetty
paul is ‘unstuck in time’ and lives his life out of order a la slaughterhouse five (one of my favourite novels). done very well.
take a sad song and make it better by javelinbk
1980s paul moves his ex-boyfriend into his house because he’s an idiot but i love him. great fix-it.
christmas lights (keep shinin’ on) by distinguished_like
paul invites john to the mccartney family christmas party, leading to some discussions between the two. very cute early years fic.
here today by herspecialagent005
december 1980 except john and paul are hosting a dinner party for some friends in scotland, with magical realism elements. ugh loved this so much, especially linda and just all the little details of john and paul settling into a life together.
kissing the blarney by tikk
paul is the blarney - this turns into a superstitious ritual in the band which emotionally complicates things but ends very satisfyingly.
writing letters (on my wall) by 15clubsaday
70s paul writes to john under a pseudonym while they aren’t speaking. newly finished and wonderful!
the jumper by merseydreams
john sees denny laine wearing HIS jumper and flies back to england to retrieve it. this fic has everything: miscommunication, john being a dumb shite, jealousy, confused denny laine, paul in all his 70s glory, and lesbian linda. truly could not ask for more.
back to where you belong by sleeprettydarling
george on johnandpaul throughout the early years. i’m a big sucker for the george & johnandpaul dynamic and how complicated and devastating it can be so naturally i loved this.
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awesomefringey · 11 months ago
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I haven't been able to find a good fic to read in about 7 months, I've only read A Distant Hazy Light over and over, but I need a good fic to get this out of my system
Ok, I understand we need to do something about it but first of all @greenfeelings wrote a brilliant series! So, I get it!!!
I read so many wonderful fics this year, here are some of them, maybe they’re for you too:
Is This Flying Or Falling by Holdingontochaos (A/B/O) It’s very sexy and very emotional. It’s also a lot of hurt and comfort. (Harry is traumatized from a past relationship, see the tags for triggers)
Quiet People Have The Loudest Minds by @2tiedships2 (A/B/O) I rediscovered it this year and couldn’t put it down again. It’s so very very sweet and made me feel warm and fuzzy.
Danger I Can’t Hide by CelticSky This is the most epic fic. I was worried it would be too dark and too real for my liking with the WWII setting, but the author finds a great balance to create a very real and life threatening atmosphere without it being too unbearable. Although I cried a lot! It is one of the best fics I’ve ever read. Great writing, amazing pacing, a truly unique love story.
Just Breathe With Me by @she-bear369 The Yoga fic. I couldn’t put this fic down. I loved their chemistry and how it was immediately palpable that there was something between them. Also Yoga instructor Louis is truly inspiring! Both Louis and Harry come with a bit of trauma they need to work through, but I loved to watch them process them and grow to be even better people, for themselves and for each other.
Love Is A Word You Gave It A Name by @larrydoinglaundry (3 part series) This one is pretty popular, so maybe you’ve read them already? If not, you must! I can’t really prepare you for it, other than that Louis and Harry will build a room in your heart and never leave it. I’ve read this one (and the 2nd part) multiple times, just to spend time with them.
Secrets, Santa? by @indiaalphawhiskey This fic is a gift to our fandom. I still don’t understand how we deserve authors like India. I’ve been wheezing and screaming over Harry, he’s absolutely hilarious and I love him to bits. The way Harry stubbornly thirsts after Louis is as silly as it is understandable because DAMN Louis is a CEO and Harry is his assistant and why isn’t this a Hallmark Christmas movie and thank god it isn’t because this one is so much better! I read this multiple times and it’ll be forever my go-to fic to get into the Christmas spirit.
And a little extra rec because you’re into A/B/O:
Behind Smoke Stained Curtains by @jaerie This fic was recommended to me recently and I haven’t read it yet but will before the year ends. So if you’re curious, give this one a go.
You can check my tags as well: larry fanfic rec, abo larry fanfiction or larry fanfiction (which is all of my reblogs for fics)
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dami-is-delusional · 3 months ago
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Fighting or Flirting?: A Series of Confusing Events (seriously. someone stop them.) - Steve Rogers x ExHydra!Male!Reader
Summary: You used to be an experiment, curated by Hydra to be a living weapon. Somewhere along the line, SHIELD saved you and decided to place you with the Avengers. As the superficial leader, Steve Rogers tried his best to welcome you. Somehow it all went downhill from there... until it didn't!
(enemies to lovers, might not be the most accurate Steve, my second fic ever so i apologize in advance.)
PART TWO: Meeting the Avengers (and your downfall... jk it's just your future bf!)
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If someone were to see your expression on the car ride to the Avengers tower, they would've assumed someone had just killed your puppy. But nope, you were simply upset that you had to join the team of heroes. Were you even going to get paid for this? Probably not. You sighed, the agent who was driving paid no mind. Now, one might be questioning why you were so against joining the Avengers. If it were anyone else, they probably would've been absolutely thrilled! Who wouldn't want to be in the same space as the heroes of New York? You. That's who.
It wasn't like you had anything against them. No, quite the opposite. You admired their heroism and their desire to keep people safe. You found it noble and extremely cool. It was like something out of your comic books. The real problem was the fact that you would have to work with them. As in teamwork. As in talking to them. As in socializing and having to hold conversations.
Due to your experience at HYDRA, you knew how to do many things. Like how to intimidate and interrogate people into giving you information. How to sneak around buildings without making a sound. How to end someone's life in 74 different ways. You know, the basics! What you didn't know how to do was how to interact with other human beings. Making conversation past a basic introduction? Not your thing! Turns out that being isolated from humanity for a good portion of your life doesn't exactly do wonders for your social life. When SHIELD took you in, you were perfectly content with going on solo missions where you only had yourself to depend on. That's what most of your life has been like anyways. It wasn't anything new. You went from one set routine at HYDRA to another set routine at SHIELD, both in which you were by yourself.
Now, you were being added to a team of people who already knew each other pretty well. You would be an outsider who didn't even know how to knock on the door. You didn't know how people behaved around each other. You didn't know how to get closer to people. You had very low hopes on surviving this. You sighed once more and the agent driver ignored you and your brooding once more as well.
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The tall and imposing Avengers tower stood like a mean taunt. Poor little Y/N is going to have to function like a normal human being! Let's hope they don't secretly hate you! You looked up at it and grimaced. It almost felt like the building was making fun of you and already predicting your inevitable doom.
"Maybe doom is a bit much. Oh, who am I kidding? If I'm lucky, the building will explode and I won't have to talk to anyone," you thought hopefully. You looked at the tower for a couple more seconds. No explosion. You sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. Before you could decide to run away to India, you stepped into the building.
The elevator ride up to the floor you were told to go to was nerve wracking. Questions and doubts swirled inside your mind like a snowstorm trying to keep you frozen where you stood.
“What if I can't do my job properly? What if I can’t figure out how a team works? What if I trip when I step out of the elevator and that’s all they think about?” Luckily (and unluckily) for you, your thoughts were brought to a stop when the doors of the elevator opened. Taking a deep breath and giving yourself speedrun mini pep talks in your mind, you took your first step as an Avenger.
CRASH.
Several people stumbled over to the elevator and tried their hardest (and failed miserably) to look normal and stoic. Clint Barton and Tony Stark seemed to have toppled over each other in an attempt to be first. Natasha Romanoff and Bruce Banner approached in a much more orderly fashion, the former looking as though she was going to whack the first duo. Finally, the poster boy of all of America. Steve Rogers. How could someone look like a Greek statue and a golden retriever?
“So these are the Avengers… at least I didn’t trip!” you thought, feeling the most joy you could muster up from this day.
The owner of the building and the man who could probably buy your entire life with one phone call started to speak first.
"So you're the new member that Eye-Patch was telling us about! Welcome to my- our tower," Tony said in greeting, correcting himself after a sharp nudge from Natasha. You knew both Natasha and Clint since they were also SHIELD agents like yourself. You hoped that they could help you out so that you didn't actually have to talk to someone entirely knew about it.
"Yeah, I'm Y/N L/N," you answered simply. You were already off to an awkward start as you stood there, unsure of what to say. You had expected this, of course, but it felt ten times more unbearable in real life.
"It's nice to meet you. I'm Steve Rogers, welcome to the team," came a kind and gentle voice.
You looked over at the source and saw Captain America himself, smiling politely. What were you supposed to say to that? You didn't want to lie and say you were happy to be here.
"Shit, should I smile back? Do I say thank you? Oh wait, a thank you sounds right..."
Hoping no one took note of your obvious silent panic and hesitance, you cleared your throat, "Uh, thank you. I hope... we can get along...?" you weren't sure if you were actually replying or asking a question. At this point, you were just relieved that you managed to say something at all.
To your surprise, the recently defrosted Super Soldier just continued smiling. It was beginning to creep you out. "I'm sure we all will. We're excited to have someone new! You should join us for lunch, Stark is taking us to some shawarma place," Steve offered, his golden boy smile seemingly glowing and radiating with his optimism.
The idea of being thrown into a group social setting right off the bat made you want to jump out of a window. You prayed to some divine being that your face didn't automatically react and show your distaste to such a plan.
"I'm okay, thank you. I'm just gonna... find my room and settle down... and stuff," Lord, you wanted to shoot yourself because of how stupid you probably sounded to them. You saw the slightest falter in Wonder Boy's face but it was gone the next milisecond.
"That's alright! You do that. We can all get together another time," he suggested. You just sort of laughed awkwardly and walked past them with your bags. You wanted nothing more than to hide in a hole and never come out.
"F.R.I.D.A.Y is gonna help you find your room!" Tony called out as the group walked over to the elevator. You turned back slightly to nod in acknowledgement, even though you had no idea who the hell 'Friday' was. As you did, you noticed that Steve was staring at you oddly. He immediately looked away when you caught him. Weird... but who were you to judge?
The elevator door closed and you let out a shaky sigh. How long would you have to repeat the tedious and torturous act of making conversation? You picked up your bags, ready to crash into a bed.
Now for future references, if anyone asked you if you screamed louder than a tornado warning siren when a disembodied, robotic voice began talking, you will deny it with your whole body and soul.
So that's who F.R.I.D.A.Y is...
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A/N: This totally did not take almost a full month to make, no you're just being crazy. I don't procrastinate EVER.
Side note, I don't know why I put this off for so long. I will try my best to be a tad bit more consistent in the future.
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spaceorphan18 · 4 months ago
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SO's Guide to the Bridgerton Children so @coffeegleek can tell them apart ;)
Violet Bridgerton
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Okay, so first of all this is the mom of all these children. Her husband was Edmund. He got stung by a bee and died, so he is no longer around.
Anthony Bridgerton
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Okay, so the oldest son is Anthony. He is the current Viscount (don't ask me about British nobility, I know nothing) and is currently running the Bridgerton estate, though that is not his favorite thing to do. He had very unfortunate sideburns in season one. And he likes to shout things like "you are the bane of my existence" and "LILACS". He does have oldest child syndrome where he acts like he doesn't want to be in charge, but he totally loves being in charge and telling everyone what to do.
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His wife is Kate Sharma. She is a delight, and possibly the second best character on this show (obviously after Penelope). So just remember, passionate and loud guy with Kate -- that is Anthony. Oh, and they have one child who is being born in India because Jonathan Bailey is apparently very in demand right now.
Benedict Bridgerton
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Benedict is the artsy, bisexual who hangs out on the swings with Eloise. He is an actual delight, but the writers don't seem to really know what to do with him. He makes a good comedic foil to Anthony. Also they cut his hair for seasons 2 and 3 which doesn't help the whole looking the same thing. We're speculating his season is next because of a bunch of hints. In the books he falls in love with a lower class girl.
Colin Bridgerton
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Colin is the sweet, sensitive (most likely demisexual) writer and world traveler. He's got some insecurity issues, a massive hero complex, and is a complete simp for his wife.
HOW HAVE YOU FOLLOWED ME FOR THE PAST TWO MONTHS AND NOT KNOW WHO COLIN IS - C'MON GIRL, PAY ATTENTION
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He is married to Penelope Featherington, aka Lady Whistledown, aka the best damn character on this whole show. 90% of the time, Colin is hanging off Penelope, so he honestly should be easy to spot. Also, he got her pregnant BEFORE the wedding and little Lord Feathertington was born 8 months into their marriage.
Daphne Bridgerton
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She was the main character of Season 1, who looks a lot like Keira Knightly. You don't really need to worry about her, because it's doubtful that she's coming back.
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She is married to the Duke - Simon Basset, Lord of Hastings or something. He enjoys licking spoons. Daphne burns for him. Again, he's not coming back so, you know, I wouldn't worry about it.
They do have a child together, a little boy I believe and I think they hinted at a second one? Idk, maybe the kids will come back to hang out with Gregory and Hyacinth at the end of the series.
Eloise Bridgerton
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Probably my personal favorite Bridgerton? (Idk, Colin wormed his way up there.) She stands out because Claudia Jessie is just amazing at giving her a lot quirky mannerisms. She doesn't want to get married and is really into women's rights. She is also fucking hilarious. I would love her to be asexual, but the writers insist she's getting a love story at some point, so.... The internet would prefer her to be a lesbian. That's cool, too, but also unlikely to happen.
Eloise spends a lot of her time on swings with Benedict and in is often the third wheel with Pen and Colin (though sometimes Colin is that third wheel).
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She and Penelope are BFFs. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!
Francesca Bridgerton
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Francesca is SUPER into the piano(forte) and really nothing else. There's really not a whole lot to say about her other than she IS probably going to be the lesbian of the show.
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She is currently married to John Stirling. The two are very quiet together and that's exactly how they want it. Don't get too attached to him, he's most likely going to die in the next season. John also has a female cousin named Michaela, whom the internet is mad about because she is a woman -- making Francesca's future love interest a woman instead of a man. I say more power to the lesbians. Calm your tits folks, it'll be fine.
Gregory Bridgerton
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OMG, look how adorable this kid is. He's gonna look just like his older brothers when he grows up. They've already given him a tad more to do in Season 3, and he's been an utter delight. I'm sure he'll be great leading Season 8 when we get to it in 2034.
Hyacinth Bridgerton
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The youngest Bridgerton! She is excitable and energetic and super excited about all the marriages and also KNOWS who is ending up with who and is totally down for it. She is also a sassy delight and really can't wait until she starts holding her own with Eloise!
THERE YOU GO THAT'S THE WHOLE BRIDGERTON FAMILY - DOES THAT HELP??
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itsblasttothepast · 4 months ago
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wait, checo is paired with other drivers beside max?
Oh yes, even when the main Checo pairing right now is Max, he has been paired with a few drivers:
With Lewis Hamilton (Chewis):
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This has the seniority right now, they have been cozy since 2012, and even with their ups and downs, still mantain a friendly relationship which give us delusional fans hope.
With Fernando Alonso (ChecoNano or Perlonso):
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I personally don't ship them, feel too brotherly for me, but they have been close since the time Checo entered F1, both hispanics, Checo was lighthearted than most of the hispanics drivers back then, so Alonso clicked very well with him. And Alonso has this very pansexual vibre with all the drivers, honestly, he's just sex on legs. With Checo, people think they would be good together, but I think Alonso is spoken for (Lanceeee).
With Nico Hulkenberg (Hulkenrez):
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Sorry to put more images here, but they have history. They were together in the GP2 Series, then teammates in Force India. Hulkenberg speaks fondly of Checo, but honestly, he is a little shit. I love him, but it's true. I feel he's the one pulling pigtails on the people he likes, and in this case, with Checo, was pranking him, making jokes boderline racists (but he didn't mean them like that, he was just being Nico) and just flirting with him. They are still friendly, but now with KMag, they have lost their mojo. If Checo goes to Audi, maybe they would relink the romance.
With Esteban Ocon (no pairing name as far as I know):
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Hate sex, anyone? Yes, that's why most of the fans started pairing them. I can say they sometimes had nice interactions, when they weren't trying to destroy each other, but I personally don't feel the vibe most of the people pairing them feel. Too much drama.
With Charles Leclerc (Checlerc):
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This one baffles me, to be honest. When they interact, they say he's thirdwheeling Max and Charles, but yep, people ship them, and I guess I can see the appeal, Charles seems like a nice guy, they have chemistry, but I'm not sure why they pair them (Charlos makes more sense).
With Carlos Sainz Jr. (Cherlos):
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Well, I can't see it, and now even less with their divorce, and I don't know if they ship them because they are hispanics, or because they look cute together. Carlos seems too hotheaded for Checo, and since Checo's teammate is Max, that's saying something.
With Lance Stroll (no idea of the ship name):
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When they were teammates, they had this incredible chemistry, and were really, REALLY close, that's why Lance is still one of Checo's friends in the grid. But to me, they're more like brothers, nothing romantic as Lance focus all his romantic energy on Alonso. But I can see why people ship them.
He's also paired with Daniel Ricciardo, Pierre Gasly and even Oscar Piastri, but those are rare (like one or two fic rare), I think these guys are the most popular pairings for Checo (also it tickes me off when they ship him with Lando, come on! LANDO!).
Wow, sorry about the long rant, anon!
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useless-catalanfacts · 4 months ago
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If you visit the Sagrada Família basilica in Barcelona (Catalonia), you might be intrigued by these squares with numbers. Like every detail in the building, it has a symbolic meaning.
These are a very particular kind of magic squares. A "magic square" is a series of numbers on a square grid, placed so that any row, column, or diagonal line always adds up to the same number. Well, to be fair, there is one more rule for the normal magic squares which this one doesn't follow: the squares cannot repeat numbers and must use all numbers from 1 to the number of squares possible (for example, a square of 3x3 would have numbers from 1 to 9, a square of 4x4 would have them from 1 to 16, etc). When this rule is followed, the number that results from the addition will always be the same (in a square of 3x3, the sum of 1+2+3+4+5+6+7+8+9 = 45, and each row, column and diagonal line sums 45/3 = 15; in a 4 x 4 magic square, where the sum of all the numbers from 1 to 16 is 136, the magic constant is 136/4 = 34). For mathematical reasons, the resulting number cannot be chosen, it will always be the same one if we follow those rules.
And here is why this one doesn't follow that rule, and it's on purpose. It doesn’t have all the numbers from 1 to 16 (it is missing the 12 and 16) and some numbers are repeated. And why did they do that? Here's the important bit: the result of the sum isn’t 34 (as would always be in a 4x4 magic square), but 33.
The sculptor who created the Sagrada Família's Passion façade (the artist Josep Maria Subirachs, following architect Antoni Gaudí's vision) took a different spin for these squares. Magic squares have been used as talismans in many cultures for millennia, since ancient cultures including 3rd millennium BC China, Ancient India, Ancient Egypt, Arab, and Greek cultures, among others. For the Sagrada Família (a Christian temple), Subirachs used to hide a number of great significance in Christian symbolism.
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Painting Melencolia I by Albrecht Dürer (1514) and a detail from it.
Subirachs adapted a magic square from this engraving by Dürer and changed it so that it would add up to 33: the age that Jesus Christ is traditionally believed to have been when he was executed. A number based on the repetition of another of the most important numbers in Christianity: 3, symbolizing the holy trinity.
The square in the Sagrada Família manages to add 33 by repeating some numbers and skipping others. But it also goes further than adding up 33 in every row, column, and diagonal line. The same number can also be obtained with many other combinations. Here are some of them:
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Plus, in the magic square at the Sagrada Família, there is also a sort of hidden subliminal signature: adding up the numbers that repeat and looking at their correspondence in the Roman alphabet, we get the initials INRI (Iesus Nazarenus Rex Iudaeorum = "Jesus of Nazareth King of the Jews" in Latin), which was written on the sign at the top of the cross where Jesus was crucified.
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This way, mathematics, art history and religious symbolism all come together in this little symbol.
Photos from Alamy, Martin Leicht, Sagrada Família blog. Text adapted from Sagrada Família blog. All the graphs with the numbers are from that same article.
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