#literally where the hell am i running? i can take it slow this time around besides i'm reading it on my phone

[majortomwaits]

been feeling bad about the slow reading progress on Dennis' biography so i went to my storygraph just for it to tell me that i've already read 13 books this year, what the fuck is wrong with me

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

So, I'm curious: What's your take on Aylin's experience after/if she kills Lorroakan?

Allegedly, there's some information floating around somewhere that said Aylin was angry with Selune after she killed Lorroakan, but I can't find where this info is.

If you saw posts about that here on tumblr it was probably posted by @justanotherignot! I've actually been meaning to gather up all the devnote tidbits about Selûne from Aylin and Isobel for a while now, so thank you for the excuse to do so and ramble a bit.

Player: I was just wondering what it was like in that cage of Balthazar's. Aylin: Let us not dwell on those dark days. Their memory is a vortex within my heart that leads directly to the Hells.

What is happening is, well, it's the century of unthinkable horror catching up to her. It's the Trauma(TM) - in one of the conversation options she's literally triggered by the mention of someone being run through repeatedly! It's the growing awareness that although she's been freed (and possibly reunited with her love), the secret is out and there are always going to be assholes gunning for her, aiming to use her as an "artefact" and power source to fuel their ambitions, without any regard for her, you know... basic personhood and well-being. Also, Lorroakan was blatantly lying. He didn't find any super special way to siphon her immortality with "no harm, no pain of any kind", he was just replicating Balthazar's soul cage (you can even find a letter from Ketheric to him, showing Lorroakan was pestering them).

On to the stuff from the game files! First, the conversation with Aylin directly after the Lorroakan fight in the tower. I'm going to be putting the context notes in square brackets next to the lines they apply to. I also plucked some audio out from the files for some of these because I love the delivery.

Aylin: The fire-haired fool is dead. Yet as I stare upon his corpse, I feel… sadness. Why? [Slow and curious, angry and confused by all that has happened.] Player: What kind of sadness is it? / I know something of sadness - or at least the ballads do. What does it feel like? Aylin: A gripping in the chest. As though I'd lost someone, something. [Lost in thought for a moment; confused.] Aylin: A paladin's fatigue, no doubt. You were excellent in battle, as is your way. And I am proud to fight at your side. [Remembering herself. She is Dame Aylin.] Aylin: I will catch my breath, then to camp I will bring my bones. Moonmaiden be with you. Player: Smiting is a weighty duty - sometimes it can be tiring. / Perhaps smiting has lost its pleasures. Aylin: Say it can't be so. For I am Selûne's sword. And ever must be. [She means it, but on the periphery of her consciousness is a tiny crack. Wondering about her fate.]

The above never fails to get me - she is Dame Aylin! Sword of the Moonmaiden! Glorious immortal paladin, champion of a righteous cause! She smites evil-doers for breakfast, that's, like, her whole thing! What do you mean she can't just pick up where she left off and go about her merry smitey way? What do you mean the thing that is supposed to be the literal core of her entire being (forever) doesn't feel good and glorious anymore, but just makes her feel sad and empty? No, no, no, we can't have that.

Player: One of the greatest tragedies of revenge is that it can only be taken once. / Because you won't get to kill him again? Aylin: Perhaps. Yet if I could run him through a thousand times, I wonder-- [Lost in thought, she's been triggered to remember her own fate being run through over and over.] Aylin: Battle has tired my mind, made me susceptible to flights of fancy. You were excellent in battle, as is your way. And I am proud to fight at your side.

Aylin: I will return to camp shortly. I just need a moment to… to… [Lost in thought.]

She so very desperately needs some rest and a chance to come to terms with everything that happened and that was done to her. And it's clear it's going to be hard because she is defaulting to trying to deny anything is wrong, is clearly trying (and failing) to just be her old self immediately, has blatantly internalised a lot of that classic I Am A Sword stuff on top of everything (even though her mother is huge on free will and choice!), and is just really not well-equipped to handle any of this at all.

Next, this is the post-Lorroakan convo you get if you have both Aylin and Isobel in camp.

Aylin: Ah. Ally mine. We are reunited once more. [Warm, but drained. She's not feeling like herself.] Aylin: I was just regaling sweet Isobel with tales of our prowess. Isobel: Very impressive. Thank you for helping Aylin - that wizard sounded absolutely dastardly. [Good humored. Soft in tone. A little uncertain - she's not sure why Aylin isn't herself.] Player: My pleasure. He had it coming. Aylin: He did, and it came. Now, my friend: bask in your victory. I will do the same. Aylin: But fear not: when the time comes for you to face the foe of foes, Isobel and I will stand by your side. [Rallying her soldierly spirit, but still a little drained.] Isobel: We wouldn't miss it. Not for anything. Aylin: Go well, friend. We will see you soon. And with our great powers combined, this city will be saved. Player: Hopefully he'll be the last. Aylin: There are always more bastards behind bastards. But we will run through them all, each by each.

Player: I hope you can rest easy now, Dame Aylin. Aylin: I always do, with darling Isobel by my side. Aylin: Enjoy the spoils of your victory. Spin memories of Lorroakan's death in your mind like silkfloss.

If Isobel isn't there (meaning she died in Act 2), you get this version:

Aylin: Ah. Ally mine. We are reunited once more. [Warm, but drained. She's not feeling like herself.] Aylin: I was just reviewing our fight against foul Lorroakan; your moves and mine. The victory was soundly won. Aylin: Don't you think? [Uncharacteristically, Aylin is seeking input. She's usually so confident about everything, but killing Lorroakan has not had the intended effect on her.] Player: Indeed I do. Let his demise serve as a warning to anyone else who'd seek you out. Aylin: Let him be the last. If my dear mother has any mercy, she will ensure it. [Trying to stay her usual self, but her mask is cracking a tiny bit here. Privately, Aylin is dealing with a great deal of anger toward her mother, the goddess Selûne, But she's not yet willing to face it. How could her powerful mother let all this happen to her?]

Player: We fought well - though I was a little worried about you afterward, in truth. Aylin: Set your mind at ease, my friend. Dame Aylin is more well now than she has been this past century. [Good humored. Soft in tone. A little uncertain - it's true she's better now than she has been, but why does she feel so shitty, then? (She's in the beginning of reckoning with the trauma of what happened to her).]

Player: I hope you can rest easy now, Dame Aylin. Aylin: Yes. I wish for the very same. Aylin: Enjoy the spoils of your victory. Spin memories of our prowess in your mind like silkfloss.

So, a few things pop out for me here. First, you get the more explicit anger at Selûne if Isobel isn't there, as opposed to the "hahah, I will smite all the bastards who dare come after me, no matter how many there are" line. "How could her powerful mother let all this happen to her?" just... damn, hits hard, even if you subscribe to the theory that Selûne simply could not intervene in the Shadowfell imprisonment beyond sending those poor people whose graves you find in front of the mausoleum.

And here Aylin really lays it on thick with the denial that there's anything wrong at all. Combined with the letter you get from her in the epilogue if Isobel is dead, it just paints such a bleak, sad picture. I can just see her going all out on the Sword of Selûne duty-bound paladin side of things, no rest, no healing, no stopping even for a moment, no dealing with anything at all, from the trauma to the bitterness towards mum. Until whatever horrible breaking point comes, a year or a century from now. The need for Isobel's humanising influence is so clear. I've touched on Isobel's side of things here.

Speaking of having a bone to pick with Selûne, if you're playing as a cleric/paladin of Selûne, you can get some extra very honest dialogue with Isobel in Last Light:

Player: Why has the Moonmaiden waited until now to take an interest in this curse? Isobel: Maybe she was waiting for one of us to find this place ourselves. Free will, and all that.

Isobel: Though if it were my place to ask why she let Ketheric turn; why she allowed this village to rot at his hands - believe me, I would. [A cold edge in her voice]

Player: Are you faring all right? It can't be easy holding a lone candle in such darkness. Isobel: All things with her strength. You know the litany. [A little sarcastically. She's got a bone to pick with Selûne but isn't being too overt.]

Side note: the amount of devnotes for Isobel's lines that say she's delivering them "with swagger" and being "cheeky" makes me smile every time. Love her. Love her snark.

Also, to get it out of the way: no, I'm fairly sure Aylin did not break her oath. I see this brought up a ton and I just see no way for it to be the case. There is nothing to suggest this outside of a wording similarity and it just makes no sense. Girl is clearly some flavour of Oath of Vengeance (she uses Abjure Enemy, so this is the case even mechanically, even though she's obviously an NPC and not a standard player-build paladin) and she killed a very shitty guy who was also explicitly after her in godawful ways. You can do far worse things in the game than her dramatic speech and backbreaker and not break your OoV.

[eveningepiphany]

far from sober | H.S, part II

my masterlist

part I

summary: the morning after harry taking a very drunk y/n back to his room— you hardly remember anything and harry has to remind you.

warnings: hangover, painkillers, fluff, kissing, sexual tension, swearing… licking?

a/n: I just hit 1k followers… I’m in denial. but I can’t wait for you guys to see what I have in store <3 stay tuned, because something is in the works.

———

Your head was pounding.

That was the first thing you noticed, it was a painful dull ache. The second thing was the light glaring over the thin of your eyelids.

A groan tore its way out of your throat without prompt, and you rolled over, head turning on the pillow.

And that’s when your brain clicked it. The pillow. Not your pillow.

The cogs started turning and your self awareness hit you like a freight train, your eyes flew open out of fear— where the fuck were you?

You were met with the celling of the hotel. And calmness came over you for a moment.

But, a hangover like this leaves no peace. Memories sort of flashback into your mind, in tiny grains, little bits and feelings coming back to you.

The feeling of a warm hand over your calf, or the dress you’re pretty sure was pooled at your feet?

Of course, the memories leave too much room for imagination.

You felt the presence beside you just as you heard the rumble of their voice, “Morning, lovie. Y’okay?”

You turned your head to the source of the sound, of course it was Harry, laying without a shirt next to you.

“Oh my god—“ you gasped, mentally tripping over the amount of things that were flying into your mind.

He’s laying next to you, shirtless. And you don’t remember any big chunks of last night, just little snippets.

And there’s, at the moment, a large gap between what you can only assume is being down at the bar and then ending up in his bed in his hotel room.

You push up on your elbows, wincing at the pounding of your head.

Harry’s hair is tousled, either from sleep, sex, or both and you’re scrambling to put the last two out as an option entirely.

You push the covers from your body, seeing his shirt and your entirely bare lower half aside from your underwear.

Denial is running through you a million miles an hour, and you stumble out of his bed.

“Woahwoahwoah, slow down Y/N!” He sits up as well, covers pooling at his waist.

“What am I doing in your bed? And in your room?”

You don’t give him time to answer as you continue, “Tell me… please please tell me I didn’t— that we did not have… not do anything… last night?”

He is silent a moment, “you don’t remember? Thought I’d be a bit more memorable?”

“No… no fucking WAY— ARE YOU SERIOUS— I CANT BELIEVE I-“

“Y/N!” He’s chuckling, like this is some kind of joke.

“Oh… oh Jesus, shut up!” You could cry. The first time you’ve had sex with him, probably kissed him and you don’t even remember the lead up, let alone actually doing it.

“Breathe, love— we did not have sex. Contrary to what you’re thinking, i have self control and you were clearly not in the mind frame to consent to literally anything last night.” He says, looking amused.

Your shoulders sag with relief, yet you scoff out, “I cannot believe you would joke about that!”

“Well if you’d had it your way last night, that would not be the case.”

Your hands flew over your eyes, another little crumb of your memory coming back.

You saying something along the lines of taking more than just your shoes off. God. You’re going to hell.

“I- what? Please for the love of god tell me I wasn’t like…” you trailed off, still looking for the right words.

This is foreign territory, and especially with Harry. You don’t talk about sex around him— let alone talk about sex with him.

“…forcing myself onto you?”

“Well, if it makes you feel any bett—“

“Nope! Do not keep talking.” You walked away, straight into the bathroom to the sink, running some cool water to splash over your face.

You turn the tap off, grabbing a face towel and holding it over your face to dry it— groaning into it.

He practically appears in the doorway after you take the cloth away from your eyes. He’s leaning against it. Still shirtless.

“Really, it wasn’t that bad!” He laughs, stepping into the bathroom.

You raise your brows at him.

“You really don’t remember anything?” He asks again.

“No!” You sigh.

“Well,” he begins, now leaning his lower back against the bathroom counter, “too start off, you were absolutely plastered down in the bar. So we’re most of the other girls.”

That’s right, you’d gone to the bar with all of them. That was still relatively clear.

“Then, all of us came back, and collected all of y’chaos causers. You left your wallet with y’key card in Molly’s bag, so I bought you back here.”

“Ok…” you nodded.

“You tried to word me up in the elevator if I say so myself, and then we got back— I took your shoes off—“

You kissed him. You’re now like 85% sure you did.

Because the memory slapped you in the face now that he’s relaying the timeline.

All you remember is pressing your lips down onto his. Which you’re pretty sure is real, and not a dream.

“Did I uhm…” your eyes appear hazy as you recall the memory again, “kiss you.”

It was whispered out of your lips, “or was that like— did I imagine that? Or dream it? Because I-“

“That er, yea that actually happened.” He blinked, and you flushed with embarrassment.

“I’m so sorry.” You sighed, cheeks burning as you recall chasing his lips last night, forcing him into a kiss.

“It’s fine, baby. Was nice. Then we took y’dress off, and I put you in my shirt,” he gestures to it, “which y’look good in may I add— and then we went to bed.”

“You’re leaving bits out, I’m assuming. Embarrassing bits.” You ask, even though you don’t really want to know.

“Well, I guess you could say that? You were just drunk, nothin’ t’be ashamed of. But you probably don’t want to know all the ins and outs.”

“I kissed you.” You repeat.

“Y’wanted more than that.” He says seriously.

“Did you kiss me back?” Your throat bobs after you ask, and you’re almost convinced you’re still tipsy considering how ballsy it was to ask that question.

You’re quiet a moment.

“Took a lot not to. That’s fuckin’ for sure.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Y’we’re drunk. Couldn’t 100% guarantee you wouldn’t end up regrettin’ it.”

You nod. Slowly. Processing what this means.

He has to have some kind of romantic feelings for you if he’s saying this shit. Your heart twists.

You rub at your temples, which are hurting and he noticed.

“Let’s get you some water.” He states, turning to go out the door, and you can’t help but follow him out.

He pours you out a glass, not handing it to you, just bringing it to your lips and guiding it into your mouth.

He watches you swallow.

“Thank you…”

He smiles a little at your profuse blushing, placing the cup on the bench.

But your redness only deepens as you continue.

“Thank you. For taking care of me. And uh, not taking advantage of me… that too.”

“Darling. Do not thank me for basic human decency.” He scolds gently.

“And you know your brother would have my head. Probably would just knowing I bought you back here.”

“He’d hate it.” You mumble, “if something were to happen… between us.”

You’re almost trying to convince the both of you it’s not a good idea, yet you’re unaware just how far gone you both actually are.

“Mm, he probably would. At first anyway.” Harry smiles, “makes it a little fun though, you can’t lie.”

“Make what fun?” Now you’re seeing how far you can push this.

“What between us?” He mocks your own insinuation.

“Do you have any pain killers?” You avoid the question.

“I do. I’ll get you some.” He walks over to his suitcase, rummaging through the front pockets, pulling out a small packet.

He ignores your bypass of the question, just popping two out of the foil.

His hand pauses, something ticks in his mind.

“Tongue out.”

“What?” You think you may have misheard.

“Put your tongue out.” He’s dead serious. And he’s not asking you, he’s telling you.

You do as he asks, sticking it out, allowing him to place the two little pills on it.

He picks the glass up again, just bringing it to your lips and letting you swallow it back.

“Good.” He mutters.

“Thanks.” You say, cautiously, suddenly hyper aware you’re just in your underwear.

You wipe the back of your hand over your mouth.

“So…” you begin carefully, “you’ve thought about it before.”

He brings his eyes up to you, “not exactly certain what it is you’re referring too, but I’m going to say the answer would be a yes.”

“Hm. Ok.” You state.

“Ok.” He agrees, furrowing his brows a little, waiting for more.

You step back, walking back over to the bed to lay back in it. Half because you were still exhausted, but also because you missed the smell. It smelt like him.

He followed you though, and you watched as he laid back next to you.

“You cuddled me last night.” You recalled.

“I did.” He nodded, and his own face had a blush to it.

It’s quiet another few beats, filled with the two of you just thinking.

“Do you regret it?” He asks, without prompt, and you’re not sure what he’s talking about.

“Regret what?”

“The kiss.”

“No.”

“Would you have regretted it if I’d kissed you back?”

Again, you don’t think as you answer, “No.”

His eyes find yours from where he’s laying, he’s not that far away.

“I just want to be on the same page. We’ve known eachother for a long time. And it’s not just us it would impact if I don’t know— something didn’t work out.” He says quietly.

You reach a hand out to trace his jaw, “I know. But just as you said, we’ve known eachother for a long time, and you always tend to put other people above yourself. What do you want?”

He leans into the touch with a steady inhale as he thinks for a moment, “Honestly, right now I want to kiss you.”

“Well then do it.” You say.

He leans forward now, fed up with beating around the bush.

He pushes his lips over yours, capturing them in a soft yet passionate kiss.

It’s a kiss that speaks worlds. It’s a hundred times more powerful than words ever could be. it’s almost a promise.

You kiss back, cherishing the feeling of it, and how he moved against your mouth.

“Fuck me,” he sighs into your mouth when you part it for him.

“Tongue out.” He asks again, but hearing it while he’s got his lips on you is out of this world.

It sends heat straight to your core, and you do again as he asks.

His hands are threaded in your hair and he gently kitten licks over your tongue.

It’s sensual in a way you can’t describe it, but what really sends you over the edge is when he whispers, “Is it way too early to be asking if I can suck on your tongue…?”

You laugh a little, tongue going back into your mouth as you talk, “I would’ve said yes if you asked me years ago. Is that weird?”

“Hot more than weird.”

You stick it back out and he sucks it into his mouth, swirling his own around it. It quickly turns into a French kiss though, and you start to move and explore his mouth.

“You’re beautiful. Always thought that Y/N.” He says, skating his teeth over your bottom lip.

You whimper at the sensation, “You make me feel so fucking loved.”

“Thats exactly how you should feel, darling. All the time.”

You kiss back and forth for a while, touching eachother gently over thin layers of fabric, but nothing more.

You’re in no rush.

And you’re just grateful that when you wake up tomorrow, you’ll be able to remember it with ease.

———

thank you to all who requested a part 2, I hope you enjoyed it! there is plenty more to come.

taglist:

@holholliday @jackiehollanderr @itsmytimetoodream @cherrycolas-things @buckybarnessimpp @crybabyddl @tenaciousperfectionunknown

[asheurbanipal]

'Cause I don't want to leave the comfort of this place

on Ao3

<<Previous Episode : Next Episode>>

Summary:

As their relationship moves forward, Logan and Wade start to see what being together actually looks like. Wade has a brain that doesn't work correctly. Logan is still dealing with the trauma of his previous existence. And in the middle is something new that neither quite know what to do with.

Deadpool/Wolverine

Explicit

Words: 8629

One-shot in series

Content: angst, talk of memory loss, baby in danger!, hand stuff, hand stuff while driving, dad vibes, sex jokes

"Wade, how can I put this delicately…" 

"Why the hell are you here for breakfast, again?" 

Logan choked on his bite of eggs. Hank's attempts at the aforementioned delicacy were completely obliterated by Scott's irritation. He tried to swallow faster to answer.

"Man needs a hearty meal after getting ruthlessly fucked all night," Wade answered. From beside him, Wade reached his foot over and wove it around Logan's ankle. 

"Please don't be so crass in the manor," Hank admonished, returning to his toast. Scott rolled his eyes behind his glasses. They had sense enough to not take Wade at literal face value and snap at the bait, but he wasn't exactly lying. Logan wasn't quite sure where their perception of his and Wade's relationship had landed. No one talked about that kind of shit like adults in this goddamn place. He hadn't realized how annoying that was until he had some distance from it.

"We were running drills in the Danger Room." Logan tapped his fork to his plate nonchalantly. "We run it hard, and it's two hours back to his place. I didn't think it was a big deal for him to crash in my room, instead." 

Another technical truth. Between the Void and that stupid robot thing upstate, he could feel the way his body had slowed down from disuse. If he was going to keep up in this timeline, he needed to get back in fighting shape. He had finally just taken up the offer of private simulation time. Throwing Deadpool into the mix just made it more interesting and upped the difficulty. 

What the simulation computer data logs wouldn't show, though, is that after a couple hours of nighttime training, they were both so amped up the only way to reign it in was to go back to Logan's room and put their dicks in each other in various fashions. They almost didn't make it back to Logan's room one time before he remembered the simulation chamber had very good cameras. 

"If it's a matter of food stock…" Logan offered vaguely.

"No, it's fine." Scott waved him off, but he was still agitated.

"What's up, Cy-boy? Did-wait-" Wade leaned over. He didn't have to come far, his chair already practically touching Logan's.

"What's the Jean situation, right now?" he whispered way too fucking loud.

 "It's complicated," Logan responded with a small nod.

 "Then I'll check the Wiki before I come back to that one. Don't want to insult a grieving maybe-widower."

"I admire your restraint," Scott chuffed then pushed back from the table, standing. "Don't let him out of your sight while he's in the manor." He sauntered through the arch toward the parlor. 

"I hadn't planned on it." Logan lifted his eyebrows at the space where Scott had just been. 

"If you're really in that much need, I'm happy to train with you, Logan." Storm had been quiet, holding her coffee mug with two hands as she sipped it. She kept looking at him softly. From his Storm it would have been affection. From this one it felt like pity.

Logan shook his head, dipping it back to his plate as casually as he could.

"No, I've been overdoing it. Wade already got on me last night about it."

"Multiple times," Wade added. His foot was still hooked around Logan's, and he pulled it a little closer under the table. He was in slippers, so it wasn't exactly a graceful action.

"If you want me to be able to do more cohesive teamwork, I am going to need to start being pulled for team training. Otherwise I'm not gonna be any good to you." Logan tapped very sharply on the plate. 

"Let me talk to everyone about it," Storm said softly, nodding. They'd been doing that. Saying they'd all "talk" about it, meanwhile no one would talk to him directly.

"Can I borrow one of the cars again? To take Wade back. He's got a job to prep for." Logan lifted Wade's foot where it rested on top of his, ignoring the way the rest of the table briefly flicked away from mention of Wade's return to his old vocation. Not like he could work at CarMax, anymore, and if he was going to wear the suit again, might as well slip back into the merc life. 

"Let me see what's available," Hank nodded. Which was code for "what we're willing to part with on the chance that something goes horrifically wrong." They'd all heard about the mini-van incident. Somehow…

He glanced at Wade. 

"Thanks," he said.

"When are you gonna be back?" Laura appeared in the same arch of doorway that Scott had left through, eating an apple off one of her claws. The kid had settled in quickly, blending with the younger cohort. Some of them knew her story, some of them didn't. Either way, she had gone through the standard new student fare. Get through the initial hazing, then she was part of the crowd. 

She was certainly more at home than he was. 

His first week back in the mansion, he had hovered at a distance, unexpected fatherly affection pulling him into a wide orbit around her. He also didn't know this younger generation of mutants. They were their own people to him, not sickly mirrors of the people he once knew. That made them easier to be around.

But he was an old man, and Laura needed the space. Deserved the space. Deserved to be just a kid. 

She continued to wait for his answer as he considered his day. He half-glanced at Wade, but he was focusing intensely on his bagel with strawberry cream cheese. 

"If not by dinner, then right after. Take Wade back. Run a couple errands. Then back here." The errands were making sure Wade had food in the fridge, Althea hadn't OD'd, and filling up the coin jar with quarters for the laundromat. Maybe vacuum and mop. Take Puppins for a walk and check her treat stash. They must have functioned before he showed up, but he wasn't sure how.

If there was time, there'd also be some making out on the couch at minimum. How much farther that got would depend on Wade's timeframe. 

"You askin' for a specific reason?" Logan raised an eyebrow at her. 

"Because I also need to do some training, and you're the only one I can go all out on, right now. But you've been...busy." The next bit of apple crunched loudly. The first emotion the broiled up was anger. He didn't know where it came from and it wasn't useful, so he breathed through it. That's what the on-staff therapist recommended. 

"I apologize for not being available. But in the future, please tell me if there's something you need from me. Open communication and…stuff." Logan replayed the words in his head to make sure he had crafted them okay. Good enough. He was getting a little better at it.

"Now that is some beautiful therapy speak. You should weaponize that, kitten whiskers." Wade poked him in the cheek. 

"If you actually went to your appointments…"

"Uh-unh, that's not an 'I feel' statement." 

"I feel like I'm gonna kick your ass in a minute." Logan kicked Wade's foot under the table with a grin. 

 "I feel you use violence to mask your overwhelming urge to suck my cock."

"WADE, THIS IS A PLACE OF LEARNING!" Hank interjected. 

"I feel like you're both stupid as fuck," Laura finished. "But I guess that just means you're made for each other." She took another bite of apple. "I'll see you tonight, Logan."

"Bye, kid." But she was already turning the corner of the wall. 

#####

Everything was light and bright and fluffy and yellow colored. He couldn't remember the last time he felt good . Genuinely. Whatever memory that might have been was now just a fuzzy gray space. He hated when that happened. 

Cold as fuck down here, Christ. Which is me, I guess. I wonder if that's blasphemy. 

"You were quieter than usual at breakfast." Logan tapped his fingers to Wade's palm as they moved through one of the basement hallways toward the motor pool. "Fucking weird, honestly." Wade dipped his hand into Logan's and curled their fingers together.

"I was just thinking about stuff."

"Thinking? Dangerous." 

"Surprise myself with that sometimes, too." Wade swung their arms in the space between them dramatically. "Just…I don't know…thinking about the job tonight, I guess? Then some other stuff."

"Something you need to talk about? Work through your feelings?"

"Ew no. Gross. It's more like…hm…" 

Fuck. 

Keep being told to think before I speak, and the first time I do it, it doesn't work. I spent all of breakfast putting the words together, and now they're all garbled. Shoulda written it down. Wish I could write. 

"You ever feel lost?" Wade asked. Logan stopped cold in the hallway. 

"Babe," Logan  murmured. Then he did this thing that Wade knew was going in the spank bank immediately. He slammed Wade back against the wall, metal cold on his spine. Logan pressed up tight against him, hip to hip, giving him an immediate hard-on. Logan's hands slipped around his waist. 

"My life is just one long sequence of feeling lost with short periods of knowing what I'm doing. So…kind of an expert." Logan pressed his lips to Wade, and Wade dragged him in in response, deepening the kiss. 

I love this.

I hate this.

I hate that I love this.

Fuck these fucking stupid fuck-ass emotions.  

Falling in love with Vanessa had been from before The Cancer. Before The Healing Factor. Wade knew how to do all that shit, knew how to put his boyish charm and adult-ish mouth to work. From what he had learned since coming back from the Void, other versions of Deadpool had mixed but overall successful amorous experiences, too. This particular Deadpool was drowning.  

Logan pulled away but not before pressing a few small kisses along Wade's jaw and cheek. 

"Anything I can do to help?" Logan squeezed him around the waist a little tighter, dropping his hands a little lower to rest on the top of his hips. 

"Make me an X-Man so I have a salaried position?" Wade offered.

"You're not a full-on mutant. Also…I don't have control over that even if you were." The words went up at the end like a question. It was so fucking cute. 

"Alright then maybe just this, for now." Wade leaned down, pressed his face into Logan's chest, then motorboated the shit out of his pecs for about forty-five seconds. He stayed there, pressing his nose into Logan's shirt and breathing him in. 

Oh yeah, that's a thousand times better, already. 

"You're lucky you're cute." Logan kissed Wade on the top of the head and brought his arms around Wade's back, squeezing him tighter. 

"Logan." The voice came from down the hallway. Logan snapped back, his whole body releasing Wade at once and very literally jumping halfway across the width of the hall. 

Well that doesn't feel great, but I sort of get it. 

At least the fucker looked contrite, doing that fist squeeze thing with this hands that he did when he was every so slightly nervous. Scott sauntered down the hallway, stopping short to toss a set of keys that Logan caught mid-air. 

"Civic's gassed up." He glanced at Wade. "Take as much time as you need."

#####

Logan squeezed the steering wheel hard enough the shape of his claws became visible under his skin. The radio was doing a best of the nineties hour, and he'd already sat through a who's who of pop diva and boy bands of the era. Multiple times he'd considered changing it, but Wade was a little too invested in singing along. He didn't want to take that from him.

It was also, dare he say it, kind of fun?    

When the opening riff of a smooth rock song started, Wade scrambled to change it, his chatter breaking off into something about "blow jobs" and "Kid Rock." They ended up on a talk radio station that was a little less nerve-wracking. He leaned back into the seat as Wade provided a parallel commentary with the show host.

He lifted his hand from the wheel and placed it palm up across the center console. Wade took the opening and dropped his hand into Logan's.

"I'm sorry about the thing in the hallway outside the motor pool," Logan said, chewing the words in embarrassment. 

"Whatchu talkin' 'bout?" 

Logan considered for a moment whether Wade was deflecting or he genuinely didn't catch it. They were both equally likely. 

"When Scott showed up?" He hinted. 

"OH! Oh that. No biggie, sugar bean." He squeezed Logan's hand tight enough to break a hand made of regular bone. "No grab-ass in the mansion. I get it." 

"Well, yeah that." Logan ran his thumb over the back of Wade's hand. "I don't know what their Logan was like, but I used to…uh…get around a little bit."

"You slut!" Wade gasped. Logan certainly wasn't going to deny it.

"Charles used to get on my ass about it-"

"In the sexy way, I hope."

"-'we have to be models of decency for the students' he'd remind me. He never threatened to kick me out, or anything." 

"He was probably waiting for his turn." 

"I'm on thin ice, here, though. They only invited me back on the team as a courtesy, and they don't know how to feel about you, yet."

"Oh, no, they hate me," Wade said.

"I was trying to be nicer about it." Logan glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. Wade was staring out the window, watching the landscape. "I haven't really done the physical affection thing in awhile, either. So I'm gun-shy, but I want to work on it. Just go a little slow with me."

"I'm not exactly the touchy feely type, either, peanut, so don't stress over it."

"You slap my ass basically every chance you get." 

"That's a totally different thing. I don't know how anyone in that house keeps their hands off those rosy peaches." He smirked and winked. There was something glinting dark underneath, though. Maybe that meant Wade would spend his time thinking instead of filling up the car with noise. 

Wade pulled Logan's hand further over the console. He heard a zip, then his hand was curled around the warmth of Wade's half-hard cock. 

"Are we really doing this?" Logan didn't dare drop his eyes from the road for too long, but he took half a chance to verify that what he thought was happening was actually happening. 

"When I tried to give you head the last time, you stabbed me in the ribs."

"Because I didn't want to drive us into a fucking tree, and that was the only way to get you to stop."

"Yeah, so that's why I'm doing this instead. Just let me do all the work." 

"You're deflecting from something. You need to start using your words to communicate, not your dick."

"Ngh, I'll work on it." Wade was already grunting, tiny little moans as he pressed Logan's hand around his dick and stroked himself. It was a shoddy and fast thing, Wade getting hard quickly and tensing toward completion just as fast. Wade orgasmed with barely a trickle of cum, shoulders rolling against the passenger seat as he arched his back. His voice was tight in his throat, squeaking. Soft words tumbled out between the other sounds, though, and Logan honed in tighter with his hearing. 

It was his name. 

Wade was whispering "Logan" over and over and over again just under his breath. 

That was new. 

Wade panted as he came down from his finish, licked his own semen from Logan's hand because he was simply a freak like that, then zipped up. 

"Ooh, there's an IHOP up here. We should get pancakes for lunch." Wade made that weird little self-satisfied smile of his, and dropped his hands between his legs.

"Whatever you want, babe," Logan sighed, keeping his hand off the wheel as he turned into the parking lot of the strip mall. 

#####

You have to tell him.

No you don't. Keep that shit bottled up. 

He's already figured out something's going on with you. Just get it over with, and you can work through it. 

Fucking FINE. OKAY. 

don't yell at me. 

"Shut up."

"I didn't say anything." 

Logan stared at him across the table, pouring "this ain't real fuckin' maple syrup" over his fat stack of pancakes, already through his sausage and eggs and ham and potatoes. Wade looked down at his own pancakes, a smiley face made with chocolate chips and bananas. A piece was already cut out that he didn't remember eating. He didn't remember the eggs and bacon, either, but they were devoured, too. 

Shit.

No. You just weren't paying attention, that's all. It's not the other thing.

I think.

He stabbed his fork down through the middle of the pancakes in frustration. 

"You good?" Logan stopped, fork midway between the plate and his mouth. He set it down to focus that laser attention on Wade. The gaze that made him either turn to jelly or grow a few more bones depending on context.  

Wade re-sorted his thoughts. It was just so hard.

"The constant cellular regeneration. It fucks my memory. Sometimes I just never form them. Sometimes I lose stuff. Sometimes it's nothing. Sometimes it's something really fucking important. But I can't predict it. I'll be looking for this specific little red Fiat in the back lot to sell to some douchebag, and it's not there when I remember it was there that morning. And turns out it's actually been four days." Wade sliced down into the pancakes and took a bite.

"Freaks me the fuck out." He chewed a few times, then spit it into his napkin with a gag. "Why did I fucking get this? I hate this." 

"Were those the deep thoughts in the car? The ones that made you whip your dick out?" Logan tapped his fork to the plate, and it was so…it was so annoying when he did that. That high-pitched sound. And there was this look. This pitying look. 

"Don't make fun of me." Wade's eyebrows creased hard, and he felt a scrim of tears well up.

God, this fucking sucks. Fuck this. Fuck this.

Logan paused on his own words, then snapped his jaw shut.

"Sorry. I misread the room. I'm just trying to understand. Same with some of the other stuff you do. Like when you freak out when you don't see me for a day."

I'm not nearly as smooth as I thought I was, shit. I didn't realize he noticed that.

"I feel like it's all connected." Logan dropped his fork and leaned his forearms on the table. "I just want to understand, Wade." 

"I'm terrified of losing you. Losing parts of you. Memories. The thing that I'm usually able to hang on to is the muscle memory shit. I've never forgotten how to fight or fuck, so I'd like specifically, not forget you how to fuck you. Specifically. So I keep thinking if I just-" He lifted his hands and made a squeezing motion in front of Logan's chest "-then I won't lose it as easily."

"And that makes sense to you?"

"Bitch-ass, what did I say about making fun of me?" 

"I'm not…" He craned his neck, pressing his fingertips to his forehead. "I'm not a stranger to amnesia. I know how scary it is. I'm just trying to understand your logic because it doesn't make sense to me. I don't get it."

"You don't get me," Wade snapped. 

"I don't. Not in this." 

"Cool. Awesome." Wade got up from the table. He made it to the door, then paused. He returned and dropped down into the booth, arms crossed over his chest. 

Logan has the car keys. 

#####

Wade let Logan rest his hand on his thigh, so that was something, at least. He wasn't getting frozen out. He'd been through that before, and it wasn't pleasant. 

Wade was silent, though, and that was scary. He had only seen it a handful of times over the last few months. Wade was thinking and thinking hard, focusing so he could properly turn everything over. Something was going to come out the other side of this that was important. So far it had been mostly positive, but there had to be a moment when the tide turned. 

"Logan, stop. Pull over." Wade was sitting up, eyes focused on something out his window. He obeyed immediately, trying to find what had grabbed Wade's attention. 

They were approaching a river. Along the perpendicular road, the one that connected to the main highway, two cars had pulled over to take care of what looked like a minor front-end crash. The car wasn't even stopped before Wade was tumbling out and running toward the scene of the crash.

"Wade, what're you doing?" Logan slid across the hood to keep up. "It's just a car wreck." They were approaching quickly, the two people exchanging insurance looking up in a panic. Logan tried to assure them from a distance. 

Then a loud whoosh went up, and one of the cars was overtaken by flames. 

#####

The 2010 -2016 Kia Soul was among a group of cars known to catch on fire after collision. 2.3 million of them had been recalled for it. 

That Kia, in particular, was starting to smoke under the hood. 

And now I'm running across the grass, and I'm not sure how I got here. But I'm not freaked out about it, yet. That's just adrenaline.

The fire went up just as he reached the car. A woman screamed behind him, but he knew Logan was there. Logan would take care of them. He had seen the baby in the back seat. The flames were hot on his skin as he went digging for the switchblade in his back pocket. The butt of the knife handle had a knob, and he slammed it into the corner of the back window. 

That's the weakest part of the window.

He dived through the now broken window, crunching up into the back seat. He sliced through the seatbelt and carseat anchor, but the fucker was in one of those fuck-ass bases. Whatever. He took off his shirt, threw it over the carseat, then kicked everything he had into the door. It broke off the hinges. 

"Wolverine, catch!" Then he threw the carseat clear of the vehicle.

Shit shit shit I just threw a fucking baby. Wait, the car seat should absorb the shock, oh, wait, Logan caught it.

Okay. 

A sizzling sound meant the fire was moving up the engine block through the wiring. Smoke started seeping through the cabin, but the missing door should have been enough to…to…

Hm. Something's wrong. 

"Wade, you idiot." Logan's voice. The SHNK of claws through the door behind him, then he was being scruffed around the neck. 

He lost some minutes in the confusion of his body being manhandled by familiar arms. 

"I swear to God, why don't you think ? You're going to kill me if you die."

Wade snapped back as the water hit him, Logan's arms wrapped around him tightly. 

"I got you," Logan murmured in his ear as they resurfaced. They kneeled together in the shallow water. The flames crawling up the car hit the gas tank, and the fire shifted color and increased intensity.

"Why am I in the water?" Wade asked. 

"You were literally on fire," Logan growled. "Full on human torch."

"Oh, is that what that was?" Wade settled back into the plane of Logan's chest. Fire was tricky. It would keep eating through cells as long as they regenerated. Surprisingly draining to heal from.

"How is it that you can fight endless mobs of yourself without breaking a sweat, but doing a basic smash and grab rescue you look like a drunk frat boy with a hernia." Logan was also a little out of breath, though. They both knew that these little on the spot jobs were the hardest. With a full on mission, you were ready. You warmed up. Zero-to-hero took a little more out of you. It was more personal. More up close. Bunch of people die during a dab of super-villainy, sure. If someone kicked it right in front of you because you couldn't pull them off the subway tracks in time, that sucked a syphilitic dick.

And I don't exactly randomly rescue people. Not before this. Waste of cardio.

What have you done to me, my dearest darling? Heart of my heart.

"I didn't have the suit on," Wade replied as a way to wrap up all those thoughts. Logan kissed the back of his head. 

"If I tell you to communicate better, will you remember?" Logan sighed. "I'm being extremely serious. You might forget things, but I remember. And I remember well when I'm at full mental capabilities. Got a lot of trauma up there, so there's not a lot of room left." He squeezed Wade even tighter, the breath puffing out of him. "And I can't manage both our impulse control issues." 

"No promises, honey badger. This brain doesn't always connect to this body." 

"I…okay. That I might understand."

#####

They slinked through the door into Wade and Althea's apartment, clothes still dripping wet. Logan didn't smell anyone, so Althea was out and had taken Puppins. Reasonable. Wade loved that damn dog, but he wasn't home consistently enough, right now, to take care of her in full. Wade had been chattering endlessly about car recalls and leaking gas tank valves, but he fell instantly silent once they passed the threshold.  

"I don't like being here alone," he said flatly. 

"I'm here."

"But you're going to go back to the mansion later."

"Yeah, but you're gonna be working. I can stay until you leave. If Scott gets shitty about the car, then whatever."

"Yeah, but-" 

"Wade. Babe." 

Wade spun around in the middle of the living space, arms flopping.

"Why did you decide on 'babe?'" Wade pouted.

"You call me whatever new thing you think of at the moment, but I'm more of a find a pet name and stick to it kinda guy." Logan rested his hands on his hips, trying to decide where this was going.

"You called me 'daarrrlin' the first time." The impression was pretty spot on. "Then it was 'honey.' Then it was 'sweetness.' But now you've landed on 'babe,' and you stayed there. I want to know why. Show your work."

Logan blinked at him a few times. He wasn't sure he could actually explain it. 

"I went to call you 'bub' one time in front of the others, and it came out 'babe.' And I just…liked it. So I kept it. It…fit."

"You've called me, 'babe' in front of the others?"

"Yeah, probably a few times. I'm not really counting."

"Do they know we're together?"

"I haven't been keeping it a secret, so yeah, probably. They're not stupid, and we're not exactly discreet. Last week you asked Scott if there was any flavored lube in the next delivery because, and I quote, 'when I eat Logan's ass later, I want to make sure I pair it with the right wine.'" 

"Witty banter. I didn't know they were imagining us fucking night and day all over the house."

"Night and day, sure, technically. I think 'my room' isn't really 'all over the house.'"

"There was that one time in that empty classroom." 

"That doesn't count," Logan choked. 

"Mmmhmm." Wade clucked, popping his tongue loudly against the floor of his mouth. "So, to be clear, the entirety of the X-Men know that I've been all up in this." He made a waving motion that circled all of Logan's body with special attention on the crotch region.

"Again, yes. Probably." 

"That's extremely embarrassing for you," Wade smirked. 

"I'd like to go back to the ass-slapping."

"I told you. Those cheeks are irresistible. I cannot be contained." He moved forward a few steps and wrapped his hand around Logan's wrist. "Let's change. You can wear my sweats."

"Please don't give me one of the blow-job shirts," Logan said as he was pulled across the room to the set of hampers where Wade kept his mishmash of clothes. 

"Now you're getting the cum slut booty shorts." 

Wade started to strip, his body moving with slow, awkward, weirdly normal movements. It was the second degree burns and smoke inhalation. On the surface they looked like they healed quickly, just a little knitting of flesh. But they hurt underneath a lot longer than other injuries. That was probably why he still seemed off. But there was also…

"Wade." Logan waited for Wade to turn around. His flannel was now sitting wet and balled up in the back of the Civic. Instead, he pulled up the bottom of his t-shirt slowly, tantalizing, letting it whip over his head with a stretch of his body. "So you can remember better." He held out his arms, canted slightly into a soft U-shape. He turned slowly, trying to give Wade some kind of show. He wasn't exactly good at this sort of thing, but something about it made sense.

#####

Oh, you sweet sweet idiot. 

Logan was just standing there, back to him, triceps fucking rippling. 

Do you have a license? For those guns?!?

"You stupid slut," Wade whispered. He moved to Logan, and whipped his arms around his waist from behind. He had been stopped with his wet boxes halfway down his hips, and he just let them fall the rest of the way.

He needed Logan to be naked, too. Not anything more than that, surprisingly. Just naked. He struggled with his belt buckle, but the damp leather had swollen in the metal loop. Logan cut through it with the tip of one of his ever so slightly extended claws. He retracted then turned in the circle of Wade's arms, breaking the loop with his taught ass. 

JESUS. 

Wade pulled the broken belt free, then somehow managed to fumble down the zipper and top button of his jeans. But the slim cut of the pants was clinging to his glutes and thighs. Wade yanked on them, and they wouldn't budge. 

Oh, god, I'm going to cry over pants. 

"I can't get them off." He already knew he was mumbling, the rattle of his thoughts only slipping out in little breathy whispers. 

"What was that?" Logan asked gently, leaning in and up to Wade's ear. 

"TAKE OFF YOUR PANTS."

Logan didn't question the zero to one hundred reaction, just slid his pants down himself, taking his boxer briefs with him, then stepping out of them. Wade slammed himself into Logan's body, wrapping his arm around him again, digging his nails into his spine and shoulder blades. Logan's arms came up from below to hug him back, tight, pulling their chests and stomachs and hips together.

Wade attacked him with his mouth. That was the only word for it. He wanted to bite and chomp at Logan's face. To rip the flesh from his immaculate cheeks. The only thing holding him back from going full animal was how tired he was. 

"Pick me up," he whined into Logan's neck, then jumped until his knees were locked around his hips. Logan made a little oomph sound, but snagged him around the waist and under his ass. 

He dropped them both on the couch. It was only just big enough to hold them, but not nearly long enough. Logan ended up with one leg up on the back of the couch, bent at the knee, shoulders propped on the arm. Wade settled into the shape his body made, curling one ankle underneath Logan's other leg. They were immediately intertwined. 

Their lips fell against each other, desperate and stupid from adrenaline. Familiar, though. It should be. They'd been doing this very thing almost every day for months. 

The end of this honeymoon phase was going to be a bitch .

Can you get That Good Dick DTs?

That feels insensitive…

FOCUS. 

They were getting hard against each other as they kissed, the weight of Wade's body pressing him deeper into Logan. 

Then that asshole pulled away.

"Probably shouldn't get too caught up in this. You've got your job tonight." 

Wade groaned, stretching a little. 

"There's no jooooob. There never was one." 

Logan's hands went extremely tight on Wade's skin. The very very very tippy tips of Logan's claws pierced his flesh, and he shivered in the pain-pleasure-pain. 

"If you say the words 'educated wish'..." His warning delivered, he retracted his claws again. 

Wade rolled his forehead across Logan's chest. 

"I started talking to my old merc contacts when we got back from the Void. I started picking up small jobs when you moved out. Real easy security shit. Made it easier to deal with you not being here. But then after the robot thing the jobs felt…boring. And any time I had to choose between working or spending time with you, I chose you. So I started getting picky."

"How are you paying your half of the rent?"

"That's the weird advantage of the merc work/shithole apartment combo. Couple good jobs and you're covered for the month. Not dressing in Givenchy, but you make it work." 

Logan sat up, forcing Wade to do a weird little half curl just to keep himself wrapped around his body.

"But why lie about it? I don't like you lying to me." His voice was sharp. Angry. Wade rolled back over his thighs to sit up on the couch. He brought a pillow over his half-hard cock to not distract himself then shoved one over Logan's for the same reason. 

"I don't know. I was embarrassed? Maybe? Worried you'd get tired of me, but also worried if I said I needed space you'd think I was tired of you . Problem solved in both directions if I have to go to a job. But I hate not being around you. It physically hurts when I don't get to see you for some reason. 

"Well not for some reason. There's a reason. It's because I still can't seem to remember what you smell like when you're not around. And you can smell me; you know what I smell like. You know I'm coming. I actually stole one of your shirts, and I sniff it when we're not together. And I'm like 'mmhmm, yep, that's Logan.' My boner certainly recognizes you. So why can't I smell you from a distance? Clearly that means I can't remember what you smell like. Then obviously there's other things I'm probably forgetting too, and I don't even realize it. 

"But what kind of needy-ass bitch tells someone 'hey, I have to sew my face to your ass Human Centipede style because I'm worried I'll forget what it tastes like.' Listen to how insane that sounds." 

"I do agree that you sound completely unhinged," Logan nodded. 

"Thank you for validating my emotions. I appreciate it." He leaned back on the couch. 

I'm actually completely serious; why does that sound so sarcastic?

#####

Logan traced the hunched curve of Wade's body as he curled up on himself. That was the thing that no one understood about Wade. The thing that he had to keep reminding himself when he told Wade to slow down and think. Wade did think. It was just too quick and frenzied, ideas cycling as fast as his brain regenerated new neurons. 

So when those thoughts emerged they sounded like madness.

"Wade." Logan stopped. Careful. Gentle. Breathe. "I can smell you because I have super senses. Other people can't smell each other from down the hallway. I need to be sure that you understand that before you spiral." 

"I want to be able to smell you," Wade replied blankly. 

"What if I wore a very specific cologne that you pick? Then you'll be able to smell me from farther away."

"But then you wouldn't smell like you anymore."

"So, see, you do know what I smell like."

Wade attempted to retort, then stopped, pursing his lips on his objection. Logan leaned over and rested his forehead on Wade's shoulder. Careful. Gentle. Breathe. 

"Don't lie to me, again." It was a bark, immediately losing the pattern of his mantra. "I can't do this if you lie to me." Wade's body tensed. 

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

"I'm saying I love you. But love's not enough if you're going to keep big things from me. We're fine, still. It's okay. But it's not something I can ignore." Logan pressed his palms together and squeezed. Too much shit happened to his brain that he couldn't control. He didn't need additional complications.

Wade's hands crawled into the square of Logan's forearms and gripped them tight at the crook of his elbows. 

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please don't end us when we just started. I love you." He pushed his body into Logan's forcing them back into the position they were in before. "I'll show you. What do you want? Just tell me what to put where."

"Babe, shut up." Logan clapped his hand around the back of Wade's head and pressed it to his chest. "If you don't have to rush off somewhere, then just lay here with me. There's too little of that in my life." He dragged his fingers up and down Wade's spine. He had been too intense, let the trauma do too much of the talking.

The half-lie that made him follow Wade in the beginning had turned out all right. It was a falsehood he could understand the desperation of in hindsight. A little white lie about a gig from a man who literally didn't understand how his own brain worked wasn't the kind of thing to blow up a whole relationship for. And Wade understood. He wasn't ignoring him or disregarding his feelings on the matter.

Wade would remember this.

"You don't have to solve everything with sex or violence," Logan said. 

"What about sex and violence?"

"Sure. Okay. But only if they're at exactly the same time in equal amounts. "

"I love it when you pull out the quips. It's so sexy." Wade dragged his teeth down Logan's chest and kissed his nipple, running his tongue over it in little flicks.

"What did I just say about using sex to solve your problems?" But they'd also just had an incredibly serious conversation while both completely naked, so maybe Wade deserved at least a little credit. 

"My dick is shaking hands with yours, right now. Where did you think this was going?" 

Wade's arm snaked down into the space between them. His large hand came around both of them, pressing their shafts together. Just a little bit of movement, and the friction of his rough palm started Logan on the long, spiraling draw toward pleasure. He met his own hand with Wade's between them, wrapping around the other side of their paired lengths. Logan ran his other hand up the back of Wade's neck, pressing his fingers into the back of his skull. 

"That feels so goddamn good," Logan growled. 

"And you said not to use my cock to communicate." Wade ran a few kisses along Logan's jaw before nibbling on his skin. 

"Why do you use your teeth so much?" Logan asked between little kissing pecks across his lips.

"Because I'm a freak. Do you want me to stop?"

"Fuck no."

Wade nipped at Logan's chin harder.

"Why don't you use yours?" Wade asked. "Bring more of that mustelid energy to the bedroom."

"I have no idea what that means, but if that's what you want…" 

#####

Logan's teeth sunk hard into his shoulder where it met his neck and-

-fuck shit if I was closer I would have come a fountain. 

Logan's jaws locked into place, and he dropped the hand that had been on the back of Wade's head to around the small of his back. His hand tilted to grip around the shape of his ass, and their lower bodies pressed together tighter. Logan's hand grappled with his until he couldn't be sure who was stroking who, everything a mass of sensation on the back of that quick, hot buildup.

Slowly, the thoughts dripped out of his head until there was nothing left but need . Raw. Nerve endings that normally fired in pain instead trilling with pleasure.

Sex and violence. 

He pumped faster, trying to focus on the man underneath him at the same time. How Logan's skin felt against his. The scratch of Logan's body hair on his stomach and beard on his cheek. The sting of Logan's teeth in his muscles and the way his body kept trying to heal around them. The sloppy weep of Logan's precum dripping over his hand. The steam of Logan's sweat as it curled around their bodies. 

Tobacco and orange peel and leather and a jar of nickels. That's what Logan smells like. I know what Logan smells like. 

Logan fucked up into his hand from below, their heels and toes tangling together as they both tried to push against the couch for leverage. Logan's whole body tensed, hips thrusting up to lift them both. He released his mouth from Wade's shoulder and howled as he erupted over their hands. 

Wade crushed his mouth against Logan's as Logan brought him the rest of the way.

"Fuck," he whispered into Logan's mouth as the spring broke and his own cum spread out between their stomachs. He tried to dig for something else to say. Some little jokey joke to break the tension. He couldn't find anything, his brain flaring back to life with a gasp and a scream, full of nothing but Logan. 

#####

Logan flicked over Wade's shirt with a half-extended claw and caught it in his fist.

"Sit up," he murmured into Wade's ear. 

"Dun wanna." Wade tucked his arms under Logan's shoulders in protest. He stabbed Wade in the ass a little with the still out claw, and that startled him into rolling off just enough. "Love it when you use the claws to push me around."

"Do you actually?" He wiped them both down and threw the shirt on the floor. Wade rolled back, resting his head on Logan's chest. "Because I spend a lot of energy attempting to not spear people I care about through the stomach. If you're into it, though, I could be convinced to reconsider."

"Our safeword can be Graymalkin. Because I'm one of…Cable's ships…that…that one didn't come together." 

He was too tired to rise to the bait of whatever Wade was talking about and rested his hands gently on Wade's back instead. The TV across the room flicked on. 

"Found the remote. It was between the cushions." Wade flicked through some channels then stopped with a soft "oooh."

"What the fuck is this?"

"Say Yes to the Dress. Wedding dress shopping, but each one costs three month's rent."

"Shit, weddings are expensive." He watched the movement on the TV for a careful few minutes. "Okay, that dress looks great on her. Why is her mom being a bitch about it?"

"FUCKING RIGHT?"

Logan woke at the sound of someone at the door. They had fallen asleep on the couch and it had grown dark in the interim. He pulled an arm out from under Wade's weight, shook the pins and needles out, and prepped his claws to spring free. Whoever it was slid a key into the lock. He relaxed. Althea. She had caught them in worse, and at least she wouldn't see they were currently naked on her couch. Logan shook Wade awake a little. 

"Althea's home. We should maybe pretend we're decent people."

"We're absolutely not, though," Wade said sleepily but moved to sit up. He half pulled the blanket off the back of the couch, but was still waking up and moving slowly. 

The lock clicked and the door cracked. 

"Hey, you old slut," Wade yawned. Then the door finished opening. 

"Oh my god. I'm gonna gouge my own eyes out." Laura pushed Colossus in front of her and used his body to block her view. For his part, he lifted his hand to shield his eyes and turned away. 

"I said to knock when entering a man's private home." His deep Russian accent was caught between admonishment and embarrassment. 

Logan snatched the blanket and threw it over both of them. 

"If you don't want to see my ass, then hand me some pants," Logan barked, gesturing toward the clothes hampers. 

Colossus volunteered himself for the task, still keeping his back to them as he grabbed a set of shorts and a pair of sweats and threw them across the room. Logan gave Wade the shorts and shimmied into the sweat pants. 

"Laura, what the fuck are you doing here?" He stood, moving away from the couch. She gave half a glance over her shoulder then turned when she could confirm he was half-dressed. 

"You said you were going to train with me tonight, but you didn't come back." 

"Shit." Logan pressed his palms to his forehead. "I'm so sorry, kid. Wade's job��got canceled-" the lie came easy and he hated himself a little for it "-and I lost track of time."

"Yeah, I can see that," she tsked. 

"You didn't need to come all the way here."

"That idiot throwing a baby out of a car is getting memed on TikTok, right now." Laura gestured to Wade. 

"Oooh, I've never been viral before. Well, not on the internet. Been viral a few other ways." Wade had propped himself up on the arm of the couch. 

"So I called your phone to check on you. When you didn't answer, I got worried. Colossus offered to drive me over, and Yukio gave me her emergency key."

"My phone…" Logan lifted his hand to his chest where his shirt pocket would have been. The shirt that was currently curled up in the back of the Civic. "Shit."

Logan dropped on the arm of the couch, scooting Wade over a few inches. 

"Okay, how do I fix this?" Logan asked.

"I don't know. You're not dead, so I get to be mad at you. But you're not dead, so I'm also relieved." Laura spread her hands in a weird half-shrug.

"You could set up a training schedule," Colossus tried to mediate. 

"Wait, that's actually a really good idea." Wade hung half-off the couch. "Because I'll fight you. Like, I'll kick your fucking ass as hard as you want."

"I could go for that," Laura replied. 

"Your level of enthusiasm worries me," Logan said. 

"It's your DNA," Wade reminded him. He pressed his eyes shut in annoyance, realizing he was right, and that was really fucking weird the more he thought about it. 

"Let's set that up, okay? Book us into the Danger Room. We'll make it a standing date."

"Yeah," Laura said quietly. She bit her lip and took several hard breaths. He recognized that coping mechanism. "Come here a sec." She moved into the corner of the kitchen part of the space. Not a lot of room from the other two but they had a vague sense of privacy if Logan created a body-wall. She lowered her voice. 

"You're not my dad," she started.

"I…am, though…"

"You know what I mean," she sighed. "You were the closest thing I ever had to a real parent who actually loved me. But our time together was so short. And we kicked ass in the Void. But you're also dead. I mourned you. But now you're here."

"And I'm not your Logan. No, I get it." He crossed his arms over his chest, hyper aware of being shirtless, still. 

"I'd like you to be one of my Logans, though. But I'm not totally sure what that looks like or how to do that. And as much as it annoys me, I'm also dealing with the fact that I have to share you."

Logan glanced down, looking for Wade out of the corner of his eye. Wade was watching them over the top of the couch, peeking up just the top of his head.

"I already had this conversation with him, but I haven't really been part of a family in awhile. So if I fuck it up…"

"Hey." She punched him in the arm. "If I end up living as long as you do, we got time to figure it out, right?"

"Those smarts aren't my DNA."

"Nurture vs nature?" She patted her hands on her thighs. "Well, you're alive. So I'll go. Forgive me if I don't hug you goodbye."

"Yeah." He reached out and patted her on the side of the arm. "Thank you for giving a shit about me, kid. And Wade, even though he's an idiot."

"You're both easy to give a shit about it." She paused. "Also, your pants say Big Booty Goddess on the back. Thought you should know."

#####

Easy to give a shit about. 

Ringing endorsement, honestly. 

They had finally found the note that Al left them about a long weekend in Atlantic City. Logan had already decided to stay that night, but that secured it. Didn't mean he didn't freak out a little when the other half of the fold out sofa was empty an hour after they had gone to bed.  

Logan had only gone as far as the dining table, though, talking on the cellphone he had finally retrieved from the car and working through the last few swallows of a floral juice glass of Jack Daniels. Wade watched him with his chin on the back of the couch.

"Okay so she's in her room…Okay…Thanks, Hank…She was supposed to text me when she got back, but…No I recognize the hypocrisy doesn't mean I didn't want to check on her." Logan chuckled darkly. "Um, I was going to talk to you about this tomorrow, but since I have you I figured I'd give you a heads up. Not blind side you. If there's a place for me on the X-Men, I don't want to lose it, but I want to live with my boyfriend. Maybe be available for freelance. Only if that's doable, though."

boyfriend boyfriend boyfriend boyfriend

"Can we talk about what that might look like? Yeah…Okay… Yeah. I'll be back in the morning…Yes I'll talk to Scott….yeah. Okay. Thanks again, Hank." He set the phone down gently, considered the opposite wall for a minute, then stood.

He noticed Wade watching, but didn't say anything before crawling back into bed. He opened his arms and made a gesture that Wade should settle in. He didn't hesitate, curling up against Logan's chest.

"Boyfriend?" Wade asked.

"Are you not?"

"No I…I am…" Wade pressed a hand to Logan's chest. "Can I be serious with you?"

"God, please do." 

"Don't give up being an X-Men just because I'm a wreck. Don't pick me over them."

Logan kissed him on the forehead. 

"Not off the team, yet. And even if that's how things work out, it wouldn't be picking you. It'd be picking me. Picking a life I built myself that wants you in it."

Wade pressed tighter to Logan's body. Scent. Sight. Touch. Taste. He wanted to take it all in, to capture this exact moment in time. 

I'm not fucking forgetting this.

[and-claudia]

Against All Odds pt.4 (Joel Miller x fem! reader)

Time skip

WARNINGS: ANGST!!!!!! Mentions of abortions, arguing

General Warnings for later on: The main story will have an age gap between Joel and the reader (Reader will be 25 once we get to the main storyline), this will also be your warning that it will eventually be an x pregnant reader (if that's not your jam, I'm sorry) there is also going to be more graphic/trigger parts later on so please always to be sure to read the warnings BEFORE reading. This story will also be 18+ and TO BE ON THE TAGLIST YOU CAN NOT BE AN AGELESS BLOG (i do actually check that) also there first hand full of parts are all prologue so Joel won't actually be in it for a bit

Wordcount: 4200+ (I am so sorry it's so long)

Taglist Sign-Up (read my rules carefully before filling it out)

It’s crazy how three years of being happy and in love can come shattering to the ground with a two-word sentence. 

“I’m pregnant.” The words seemed to be echoing in the small living room of my and Joel’s apartment. 

He stood there. His expression was unreadable. I was debating on if I should repeat myself or just wait it out. I chose the latter. It felt like time had slowed as I stared back at him waiting anxiously. At this point, I would be happy if he would even just yell at me to get out. Anything seemed better than this deafening silence I was being forced to endure. 

A heavy sigh. 

Okay, good. We’re getting somewhere. 

Then he turned and began pacing, running his fingers up through his hair, then wiping his hands down his face as he tried to process what I had said. I stayed quiet. 

“How? How did this even happen? We’re always so careful.” He said. 

“I mean not every time. Ther-” 

“No. I’ve been careful. I know damn well I have been. Maybe you haven’t.” He cut me off with his suggestion. 

“I know you’re not implying that I’ve cheated on you, Joel.” I said, clearly hurt, “There have been plenty of times where we weren’t. I mean hell if I had to guess this probably happened on my birthday. We definitely were not careful then. So don’t you dare try to accuse me of cheating.” 

I felt a wave of relief when he stepped forward and pulled me to him. I hadn’t realized that tears had begun falling from my eyes until I could see them staining his shirt. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m sorry, ‘m just shocked. It’s okay. Don’t worry, we’ll get it taken care of.”

His words made me pull back but not completely out of his arms, “What do you mean?” 

“We can get you an abortion pill, I know they still have those. We’ll get one and take care of this.” He explained. 

“No…” I shook my head, “I don’t want to do that Joel… I mean I know this wasn’t planned but I’m honestly kinda excited about having our own little family.” I admitted. 

“Sweetheart… I just, I can’t do this again. It’s been so long since I’ve been around small kids, let alone a baby. Shit, it’s been 30 years since I’ve held a baby probably, longer than you’ve been alive.” 

That made me step away from him. At first, I thought he meant he couldn’t do this again because of what happened to his daughter. I wouldn’t blame him for that at all. He hadn’t talked about her again in the three years we’d been together, not unless he was waking up from a nightmare. 

“So you don’t want this baby because you don’t want to have to start over again?” I asked, disgusted for even thinking that was going to be his reasoning. 

“I mean it’s just been so long since I’ve done this.” 

“Okay, so? I’ve never done this, hell, Joel, I’ve never even actually held a baby! I am 25 years old and I’ve never held a baby let alone raised one! I was also the youngest in my family so I know literally nothing about raising a kid. That doesn’t mean that I don’t want this baby any less.” 

He reverted to silence once again. I couldn’t take it. I needed to get out of here. 

“You know what? It’s Wednesday, I was supposed to go to the market earlier… I am going to go now. Do whatever the fuck you want to here. Pack your shit, hell pack my shit, kick me out. I don’t care.” I said, walking over to the kitchen counter to grab my bag and the money we set aside for food at the market. 

“Take your gun.” He called to me. 

“I am.” I snapped as I grabbed it and tucked it into the top of my jeans before letting my shirt cover it. 

When I got to the market there weren’t that many people there thank goodness. I went over to the vendor that always has potatoes and was surprised to see that he still had most of his produce there considering it was pretty late in the day.

“Not selling this week?” I asked as I walked up. 

“Nope. Not at this price.” He said, clearly not happy. 

“I’m sorry. Give it a week though, they will be coming back next week when they realize how much they need them.” I tried to reassure him. 

“Let’s hope. Here is your bag.” He said, reaching down to grab the bag he stashed for Joel and me. 

We’ve helped him out with various things and this was how he paid us for it. I finished getting a few other things but took my time heading back to the apartment. When I got there, Joel was passed out on the couch. When I went to set my stuff down on the table I wasn’t too surprised to find the decanter of homemade moonshine half empty again, nor was it a shocker that there was a baggie with a couple of pills left in it. I just sighed and grabbed them both to put them away. When I came and saw what else was left out I was a little confused. Joel had gotten the maps out of their hiding place in the floor. I decided it wasn’t worth my time asking about now, not that I’d be able to wake him up anyways. Ever since his brother went radio silence on him he’s been a wreck. Instead, I put away the food I had gotten at the market and decided to just go to bed. 

The next morning when I woke up I heard two voices and I didn’t even have to guess who it was. I knew it was Tess. I quietly made my way over to the closed door, careful not to make my presence known just yet, and listened. 

“Trucks no good without the battery. And if I don’t get to Tommy soon, he’ll die out there.” I heard Joel say. 

What? Joel hadn’t mentioned anything about going to find Tommy. I continued to listen. From what I gathered this had been in the works for at least a little bit. They had a battery lined up for them but got screwed over. 

“We’ll get our money back and get the battery.” I heard Tess say to him. 

I finally opened the door making them turn their attention to the sound. They both froze when they saw me. 

“You’re leaving, together?” I asked. 

“Shit.” He mumbled. 

I turned around and slammed the door. I was beyond hurt. He wasn’t even going to tell me. I needed to clear my head, so I quickly got dressed then went over to the window before climbing out onto the fire escape. 

I wasn’t sure how long it had been but I continued to sit out there cross-legged. No tears fell, I didn’t have the energy for that, I just simply sat there thinking. Eventually, I heard the window slide open behind me but made no attempt to look at him. 

"Yn, come inside. You know it's not safe on that thing." He said gently. 

"Oh. So suddenly he cares." I said bitterly, “Thought you would have already left by now.” 

"Yn, I've always cared about you, always will." He said. 

"Bullshit." 

He sighed. I could hear him getting up and sitting back down on the windowsill. He didn't say a word after that. We stayed in silence for a few minutes before I spoke up again. 

"I thought my age didn't mean anything to you. I thought it never mattered that I was only 25." I said. 

"It doesn't." He said. 

"You're such a fucking liar, Joel... you told me that you couldn't do this again. That it had been over 30 years since you held a baby since you've raised a newborn. 30 years, longer than I've even been alive. Clearly, subconsciously my age has been an issue for you." I said finally turning to see him hanging his head down. 

He didn't speak up again. 

“We’re you going to tell me?” I asked referring to his plan to go find Tommy. 

“I was.” 

“When?” 

“Last night, but then you blindsided me with-” 

“I did not blindside you. I wasn’t expecting this either��� so does this mean we’re done?” 

“I don’t know, like I said I can’t do this again. I think we just need to sit down and have a serious conversation about it all. Maybe this trip will give us both the time to think everything through and we can talk about it when I get back.” He suggested. 

“When you get back?... I’m goin' with y’all.” 

“Yn, no, you can’t.” 

“Why?” 

“You’re pregnant, you don’t need to be traveling all the way to Wyoming.” He tried to sound reasonable. 

“What do you care? You don’t even want the baby. Now move, I need to pack.” I said, standing up. 

He knew it was no use arguing with me once I made my mind up it was made and I was going to stick to it. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t pissed that I was going. 

I grabbed my bag and threw in what I would need before tossing my gun in on top. Joel had already left the room and was getting the rest of the supplies together out in the living room. Lucky for Tess, we usually left the QZ from mine and Joel's apartment so she had stashes of supplies with ours so she was able to pack hers as well. Once we were packed we devised a plan. Well, they did. I didn’t know the details and Joel was being petty not telling me them and Tess was following along. All I knew was that we’d go into the old subway tunnels to come up through the bottom of the building where their guy that had their money and truck battery should be. 

“Alright, come on, kid.” Tess said, slinging her bag over her shoulder. 

“I’m not a fucking kid.” I snapped. 

“Damn, someone is not happy today.” She said, walking out the door. 

I grabbed Joel by the sleeve of his denim shirt to get him to hang back for a second. 

“Have you told her yet?” 

“No.” 

“Good. Don’t.” I said. 

“Hate to break it to you but she’ll find out eventually. Can’t hide it forever, sweetheart.” He shot back. 

“I know. And when I am ready to tell her about my baby, I will.” I said before letting go of his arm and following Tess out. 

The walk to the access point of the abandoned subway tunnels was quiet. When we finally made it to the building, the doors had been re-chained and locked once again. That had never deterred us before, it definitely wouldn’t do it today. Joel cut the chain and we were in. We took a second to get our guns and flashlights out. I had never liked going through the tunnels before, they were dark and damp and smelt like mildew. I wasn’t entirely sure if the smell had actually gotten worse since I had been down there or if maybe it was because I was pregnant but it was almost making me gag. 

And the deeper we got, the worse it smelt. I was half tempted to just turn back around. But I had a point to prove, I wouldn’t give Joel the satisfaction of leaving me here. When I heard Tess say she found the way out I was relieved. Once we got through the door I stopped in the small entry area as Tess went on ahead. 

“Joel, can you grab my water for me, I feel like I am going to puke?” I asked, trying to keep myself from puking, the air in here wasn’t nearly as bad. 

“I told you, you shouldn’t go with us.” He said but still stepped over to grab the canteen from my bag. 

Before he got a chance to grab it though we heard Tess yell. That caused both of us to spring into action and follow where she had gone, guns ready. When we made it around the corner we saw no immediate threats, but as my eyes scanned I saw why she had yelled. 

Fused to the wall was, what used to be, a person. Their body was completely taken over by the fungus. 

“It’s dead.” 

“No shit, Joel.” I said back. 

“I know, I just wasn’t really expecting it.” 

“Was he not here last time?” I asked and she shook her head. 

“You think he came down here after he was infected?” Tess asked. 

Joel was quick to respond with, “Maybe down here is where he was infected.” 

“I’m sure we’re fine…” I said trying not to dwell on that idea too much. 

“Yeah, let's just keep moving.” Tess said, turning and leading the way once again. 

We finally made it to a sketchy-looking ladder. Tess went first, then me, and lastly Joel. As we climbed Joel made a comment about the construction of the building itself, something about it getting updated in the 80s or something. Despite the fact I didn’t always know what he was talking about when it came to construction, I always loved hearing and learning about his old interests. Tess cracked a joke teasing him about his construction-nerd comment, which made me smile slightly. We climbed a little bit higher before Tess got off the ladder. 

It was a small landing with only a single door. 

“This should lead into the hallway.” She said as she went to push it. 

“Is it stuck? Or is something blocking it?” I asked after it didn’t budge. 

“What the fuck?” She asked, shoving it again. 

Then the smell hit me. 

“Okay, I know y’all have got to be able to smell that.” I said. 

“Yeah, it’s gunpowder.” Joel confirmed 

We all scanned the area around us for its source. Then Tess found it, seeping up from under the door was a stream and pool of blood. She shoved the door a little harder and was able to move the body that was slumped in front of it. 

When we made it through I was shocked. There were probably at least half a dozen dead people. Beside one of the men was the truck battery. I didn’t know much about cars, but I did know one that corroded wouldn’t have worked. 

As if to confirm my thought Tess spoke up from where she was squatting down beside it, “Well, the battery’s no good.” 

“Do you think he knew?” I asked. 

“Oh yeah. He knew, and he still tried selling it, twice. Greedy motherfucker.” Tess said as she stood. 

Just as she finished speaking we heard something further up the hall. Joel wasted no time, bringing his gun up and going in pursuit of the sound. I was right behind him, my own gun raised as well. 

“Stay back I got this.” He said quietly over his shoulder. 

“What if there is more than one?” 

He gave no answer and just continued down the hall. We rounded a corner and there was someone trying to help another person up off the ground. Before we got close enough to them the door to our right swung open. I stepped back in time, but Joel didn’t react quickly enough. Someone lept out of the now open door, knife in hand. Joel threw them to the ground quickly and pointed his gun at them. It was then that I realized it was a kid, couldn’t be older than 15. 

“Joel?” The lady down the hall called out. 

I turned my attention back to her and brought my gun up to aim it at her just as a precaution. 

“Marleen?” Joel asked back. 

They know each other?

The lady, now known to me as Marleen, checked on the girl who said she was fine. But then she went to grab the knife she had lost after getting thrown to the ground by Joel, but he quickly stepped on it blocking her from being able to. 

Marleen then called the girl’s name, Ellie, to get her attention. That’s when she noticed that Marleen was hurt. She had just finished reassuring her when Tess joined us. 

“So this is who Robert screwed us over with?” 

The two of them continued a small banter as my attention went back to the girl. I saw her reach for the knife again. Joel quickly turned to point his gun at her. 

“Don’t.” He warned, causing Marleen and the person she was helping to bring their own guns up to point them at him. 

“Not at her!” Marleen said firmly, as Tess and I both aimed our guns back at her and the person with her, “Point it at me.” 

I stole a glance at Ellie, her hands were raised and she looked terrified. Joel slowly took his aim off her and brought it back to Marleen. 

“No offense,” She began, “Our reason for needing that battery is much bigger than yours. Tommy is just one man…” She paused to gauge Joel’s reaction, “It’s our job to know things.” 

“To know things.” Joel repeated, “You’re the same cause that caused my brother to turn against me.” 

“Okay, Joel.” Marleen said as if they have had this conversation before. 

Marleen’s friend finally spoke up, “That was a lot of gunfire.” 

“That means FEDRA will be here soon.” I added, knowing we needed to get the hell out of here. 

“I know.” Marleen said quietly as if she were deep in thought about something. She sighed before speaking up again. 

“We were going to move Ellie out of the QZ tonight. But now we won’t make it anywhere, not for a while at least… So, now I’m thinking, you’re gonna do it.” She said. 

“What?” 

“Like hell we are.” 

“I’m not goin’ with them!” 

Me, Joel, and Ellie all spoke at the same time.

I turned to look at Tess as Joel did the same, “Tess we don’t have time this.” He said. 

“Who is she?” Tess asked, ignoring Joel. 

“For you, consider her cargo.” 

“We don’t smuggle people.” Joel said to Marleen. 

“There is a team of Fireflies waiting for her at the old State House. I know what’s out there. We were going with an entire squadron for that very reason. Now I don’t have that, and I don’t have a truck with FEDRA closing in. All have now is you. And I know what you are capable of… For better or worse.” Marleen said. 

I glanced down at Ellie as she spoke up, “What are they capable of?” 

“You don’t want to know.” I said quietly to her, shaking my head slightly. 

“You get her there safely,” Marleen continued, “and they’ll give you what you need. Not just a battery, but the whole thing. Anything you need. I swear.” 

Joel stayed silent as he looked back at Tess and me. I glanced between the two of them waiting for one of them to make a decision about what we were doing. Tess finally nodded for Joel and me to step away with her so we could discuss. 

“I don’t think I trust her.” I said once we stopped. 

“Neither do we, but she seems desperate.” Tess said. 

“A Firefly vehicle usually means stuff repurposed from FEDRA which would give us a better-than-decent chance makin’ it to Tommy. The second we hand that kid over-” Joel got cut off. 

“Y’all can talk it through but keep in mind I am bleeding out still.” Marleen called out to us. 

We waited a moment before Tess turned back to them. 

“Okay so here’s the deal. We’ll get her to the State House. But we will not hand her over until we have been given everything we want. If not, we kill her, there and then.” 

I wanted to protest that plan but before I could, Marleen said it was a deal. 

“Really? That fast?” Ellie asked. 

“I was thinking the same thing.” I mumbled to myself. 

“You are all that matters. Go grab your bag.” 

It took her a second but she got up and went back into the room to get it. When she got back I let her go ahead of me, following Tess with Joel at the rear of our small group. We walked through the rain back to the apartment. When we got there Joel handed Tess the key to unlock it. She did and held it open for Ellie, I followed behind her. Then Tess was closing the door. 

“Keep an eye on the kid, Joel and I need a second.” She said. 

“Seriously? I can help plan!” I yelled through the door. 

I could hear them discussing which route we take and Bill and Franks. With a sigh, I turned to Ellie. 

“You can go set your bag down.” I said, nodding her over to the living room.

I waited by the door for Joel to come back inside. He eventually did and went straight to the couch. 

“What’s the plan?” I asked. 

“Kill time until it’s dark, then leave.” He said matter of factly. 

“Kill time? What are we supposed to do?” 

“Figure it out.” He snapped before closing his eyes. 

“Just don’t talk to him right now, Ellie. He’s in a bad mood.” I said. 

“Clearly.” She said making me laugh a little. 

“You like card games?” I asked, grabbing our deck off the shelf.

“Yeah.” She smiled, walking over to the table where I had already sat down. 

We played for a bit before I told her I was going to take a short nap before it got dark and advised her to do the same. I went to mine and Joel’s room to lie down on the bed there. 

I wasn’t sure how long I was asleep for, but I was being woken up by Tess. 

“You comin’ or what? Get a jacket, kid. Come on.” She said. 

I quickly got up and went to grab my jacket but hesitated. I wasn’t sure how long we’d be out there. Hopefully not long but if something goes wrong and we’re away longer than we expect, I didn’t want my jacket not to fit when I start showing so instead, I grabbed one of Joel’s older ones and threw that on. When I walked out wearing it Joel gave me a weird look. 

“That mine?” 

“I couldn’t find mine, let’s just go.” I lied. 

“You’re still coming with us?” He asked. 

“Oh my gosh, yes, Joel. I am going. Deal with it.” 

And with that, I left the apartment. 

We made it out and passed the patrols. Then we made it outside of the walls, but we weren’t in the clear yet. They had patrols on the wall. Tess was leading our group, then Ellie behind her, then me, then Joel. We had just about made it when we failed, trying to sneak past a footguard taking a piss. I felt a wave of panic but then when he realized who we were and didn’t just shoot us I felt a little better. 

“Get on your knees!” He kept yelling at us. 

“Just do it.” Tess said, getting down. 

I followed her lead, no need in making this difficult. Joel and Ellie followed as well. 

“Look, you let us do this run we will split the cards with you.” Tess tried to bargain but it wasn’t working. He had us facing away from him and was about to test all of us for infection. I still hated getting this done. Tess went first as she continued to try and sweeten the deal with him. When he got behind me, Joel reached over to grab my hand to give me some comfort, knowing I hated this, but I pulled it away quickly just as the device pricked me. Then he went on to Joel, who also tried to negotiate a better deal for us to be let go, he wasn’t biting. He got to Ellie, but to everyone’s surprise, she whipped around and stabbed the guard in the leg. As Ellie stood I was quick to get to my feet to stand in front of her as the guard aimed his rifle at her. 

“Get out of my fucking way!” The guard yelled. 

“No.” I said firmly. 

By this point Joel had gotten up and was now in front of me, “We can fix this!” 

“Move.” 

It all happened so fast. One moment Joel was in front of me blocking me from the rifle, next he had tackled the guard to the ground and was beating the shit out of him. There was nothing I could do besides watch. 

“Hey, guys!” Tess yelled getting mine and Joel's attention. 

She held up the device the guard was using to test us for infection. It was lit up red. Ellie tried to argue that she wasn’t sick. I tuned out her and Tess arguing and just looked at Joel waiting for him to react. The sound of sirens broke me from my trance. 

“We need to get the fuck out of here. Now!”

taglist: (if you filled out a form and aren't on this list that means either a) your blog is not coming up in the searches so I am unable to confirm that you are 18+, or b) you did not follow my rules for being tagged in this fic)

@sexyvixen7

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[jasongotdrip]

i had a thought. again. this may be one of my biggest yaps. +2 tiny arts included. Except it’s all horrible. It’s 2:30 am and I’m running on just straight brain power😭

wtf was charlie doing walking around during an extermination💀)

I had a daydream except it’s 2:30 am so night dream except im not really asleep but whatever. I imagined charlie found her and brought her back to the wherever and she just started YAPPING. Because she’s excited to have someone around, probably. She’s a lonely lil princess. I was thinking of a lot of different scenes this could happen in but I thought of this one the most. Charlie knows Vaggie is a “sinner” so she just casually mentions how she’s the princess, knowing (but not caring) about how most sinners disrespect her while even knowing her rank. So like she doesn’t care because she knows ‘this person won’t treat me better’. Or smth. Idk. Anyways. Keep in mind they’re not in the alley, but instead they’re… somewhere. Does charlie own the building of the hotel yet? Idk but we’ll just say yes for now because I don’t know where else they would be. Not Lucifer’s place, obviously.

but still, how/when did vaggie find out that the random girl who picked her up off the street was the literal PRINCESS OF HELL

P.s. charlie probably clipped vaggie’s hair out of her face for the sake of the bandage but i was too lazyz to draw it

CAN I JUST SAY??? CHARLIE WAS KIND OF ASS IN THE ALLEY SCENE. LIKE. WHY ARE YOU TUCKING YOUR HAIR BEHIND YOUR EAR. YOU CAN NOT BE DOWN BAD ALREADY LIKE I KNOW VAGGIE IS HOT AND SMEXY BUT GODDAM. LIKE YOU FIND THIS EYELESS WOUNDED GIRL IN THE STREETS AND ONE OF YOUR FIRST REACTIONS ARE LITERALLY WATTPAD LOOKING. (*tucks hair behind ear cutely snd looks away*) LIKE SHUT UPPPPPP.. I LOVE CHAGGIE BUT… THAT JUST IRKED ME. CHARLIE WOULD BE “OH NO I HAVE TO HELP THIS PERSON BECAUSE CLEARLY THEY GOT HURT FROM THE EXTERMINATION!! I HAVE TO GET HER PATCHED UP OR SHELTERED!!” NO!?? INSTEAD, SHE JUST TURNS FRUITY. OF COURSE SHE IS FRUITY.

i am.. so sorry for that. um. Anyways.

I like to imagine Charlie took Vaggie home, washed her up and they have a slow burn starting somewhere in there. Vaggie probably listened to all Charlie’s rants and dreams, while helping her slowly kick start the hotel’s physicality. They become better friends and begin to trust each other. because like, they’re all they got. Vaggie has no where else to go and charlie has no one else as loyal as Vaggie. So naturally they become dependent. Then romance ✨

. I know what i said about charlie tucking her hair behind her ear, but she was probably just noticing how pretty she was or sum. But still, you are in the middle of a warzone honey please stop being gay for a second 😭

but who had feelings first? Charlie, maybe because she already thought vaggie was pretty. But there’s also vaggie.. like of course she’s going to grow fond of someone who picked her up and started taking care of her when no one else would. Maybe they both started at the same time lol

No one really knows when they met Angel Dust but obviously before pilot right? I thought of a funny interaction that would kind of help the feelings be more known, if they weren’t established before they met Angel. Like there definitely are feelings in the air but they’re brought to attention by something snarky Angel Dust says when they first meet

THERE ARE SOOO MANY THINGS I COULD PUT FOR HIM TO SAY BUT I JUST CHOSE THIS CUS HE DOESNT HAVE A NOSE

Vaggie: CAN YOU SMELL MY FIST IN YOUR FACE??

then chaos. But like.. charlie and vaggie think about it. Then idk. That’s as far as my brain will take me. Hyperfixations help me yap a lot but it all stops at a certain point. There are so many ways chaggie could have been developed so it’s hard to just say one. So i kinda jjst want to see how it goes and how much they’ll show us of their backstory. I’m sorry for yapping.😭😭

[jaxteller87]

Sex Genie II

Amber POV

One night, as I lay in bed, Jax told me he had a surprise for me. He disappeared into the bathroom with a mischievous grin, leaving me in a silent bedroom, pondering what it could possibly be. Knowing him, I suspected he might emerge in nothing but his work shirt or his cut. Or— better yet, a clown costume because of the conversation we had a few nights ago about him doing whatever I want in the bedroom. As I was about to find out, his surprise was actually closer to my second guess than the first.

“Surprise!” he shouted, jumpng out of the bathroom in a full genie costume; both of his arms extended like he just pulled off a mindblowing magic trick at a five-year-olds birthday party. He even tried to twitch his nose like in the show I Dream of Jeannie.

I didn’t say shit. I just stared at him, wide-eyed. I could feel my cheeks turning red, but I couldn’t look away. I’ve seen a lot of things in my day, but this was one sight I can honestly say I never laid eyes upon, nor did I think I was ever going to. Hell, the thought of Jax in a genie costume never once even crossed my mind. Unfortunately, the clown idea had popped in a time or two since our last conversation, but this was taking the proverbial ball and literally running in the other direction with it.

“Well?” He said. He didn’t move an inch. He just stood there with his legs parted and his arms spread, wearing the dopiest of dopy smiles.

“Oh my word,” I giggled into my hands as he walked over to the bed with his infectious smile.

Jax furrowed his brow and started to crawl up to me from the foot of the bed. “What’s your first wish, Master?”

“I wish I never saw you in this goofy-ass costume,” I joked, unable to contain my laughter.

“Wish denied,” he said, kissing me up my legs to my neck.

“I’m just kidding, babe. This is wonderful.” I wrapped my arms around him, and we kissed passionately.

What started as a cute joke quickly became something bigger, adding a playful spark to our bedroom activities and beyond.

“I love it, baby. More importantly, I love you,” I chuckled, staring into his eyes.

“I’m happy I could put a smile on that pretty face,” he said softly.

“So, my lady, what wishes can I grant for you this wonderful evening?” he asked. He got off of me and sat on his side of the bed,criss-cross-applesauce style.

“Umm, well, what kind of choices am I working with?” I asked.

“Anything your pretty little heart desires,” Jax nodded.

“Okay, in that case— let’s go with genie’s choice; that way, I have a little time to figure out what’s next. I’m still flabbergasted by your uniform, Mr. Genie; my apologies,” I didn’t want to kill the mood, but he did look rather comical.

“Genie’s choice, you say?”

I nodded, “For starters— yep, that’s right.”

“Then it shall be done!” Jax bellowed, jumping up to his knees and thrusting his finger into the air.

“Oh, Jesus,” I put my hand over my mouth to try and stop from giggling. I had to get my mind off the costume and focus on our sexy time. I cleared my throat and took a second to contain myself. “So, uh— what will it be?”

“Well, my lady, Making you cum and hearing you say my name, of course,” he said, jumping back on top of me and kissing my neck.

“Okay,” I breathed as he started nibbling on my ear. Once our clothes were off, he eased himself on top of me, and I sighed happily, feeling his comforting weight.

“Slow and easy tonight?” he asked as he felt my body tense up. “Or just cuddles? We don’t have to rush.”

“No, we can. But yeah, can we start with slow and easy? We can see where it goes from there, ” I suggested. I didn’t want to let my body ruin this moment, especially after Jax had put in so much effort.

We moved in slow, sensual rhythms, the moonlight casting a soft glow over Jax’s face. I couldn’t help but marvel at how I ended up with a man like him.

“Papa,” I moaned against his neck, my hands sliding down his back before giving his butt a playful smack.

“My naughty little angel,” he growled in my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

We lay beside each other, grinning as we came down from our incredible high.

“Hopefully, you can turn me into a screen door tomorrow,” I chuckled, gently scratching his beard.

“Whatever the lady wishes,” he grinned, kissing my forehead.

“So, you enjoyed this? Wasn’t too cheesy?” he laughed, kissing the top of my head again.

“No, not at all,” I giggled. “I thought you were gonna walk in with your cut or something,” I chuckled, kissing his chest.

“Tell me you’re not going to ruin the mood,” he said, noticing I wanted to say something but seemed nervous.

“This whole genie thing, as dumb as it sounds, has helped me not be so nervous about asking for things bedroom-wise,” I admitted, laughing a little.

“I’ve known, and that’s why I’ve kept with it.”

“I mean, as we talked about before, if someone told me I’d like being spanked while being called ‘your good girl’ or ‘your naughty little beauty,’ I would have said they were nuts.”

“I think, too, that I’m nervous to ask for things because if we can’t do something because of my disability, I’m going to be disappointed or, worse, disappoint you.”

“Hey, what have I told you about that? That will never happen. I mean it,” Jax said, kissing me gently. “As long as you get off and call me Big Papa or Orgasmo, the sex genie, I’m good.”

I burst out laughing, “For the record, I’ll never call you Orgasmo the sex genie— but Big Papa, that one’s a given.”

“Fair enough.”

“So,” I began, “what are the chances of Mr. Orgasmo wearing his cut with the parachute pants and turban?”

“I thought you said you weren’t going to call me that?”

“Shit—” I did just say that.

“I’ll see what I can do, but Orgasmo, the sex genie, didn’t even prospect for the club yet, so I don’t know if he can put on the vest.”

“Okay, so...” I teased as my hand started to wander down, wrapping around his cock. “How about now?”

“I uh—” his eyes rolled into the back of his head while I started to go down on him.

“Okay, fine! You win, I’ll get the cut,” he mumbled enjoyably.

“That’s what I thought,” I whispered, and the night continued.

Jax POV

I was in the bedroom, waiting anxiously for Amber. She was taking a pregnancy test—yeah, she was seven days late. The seconds felt like hours as I sat on the edge of the bed, tapping my foot on the hardwood floor. My mind raced with a hundred different scenarios.

I glanced at the clock on the nightstand. Each tick seemed louder than the last, amplifying the silence of the room. The muted colors of the evening light seeped through the curtains, and all I could hear was the faint hum of the bathroom fan. Amber had been in there for what felt like an eternity. The door was partially open, but not enough to see inside. 

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. “Well?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Is there anything I can do? Do you need help? Anything— just name it, darlin’.”

“Teller, I love you, but I’m fine,” she chuckled. 

“You sure?” I asked, but she didn’t answer. 

A few seconds later, she popped her head out of the bathroom door. “Okay, the stick is in the cup. We have to wait three minutes.”

I stood up, my legs feeling slightly wobbly from sitting for so long. We waited some more, and then she went back into the bathroom again. When Amber re-emerged, she was holding the test in her hand. Her expression was unreadable. Her gaze met mine, and for a moment, everything else faded away. The answer was there, written in her eyes even before she spoke a word. She shook her head, and tears filled up in the corners of her eyes as I ran to embrace her.

 “I know this isn’t ideal timing, but if you are pregnant, I’ll be over the moon. We’ll make it work, darlin’, no problem— I promise.”

“You say that now. Wait until I’m as big as a whale, having hormonal crying fits every day, maybe a few times a day,” she smirked. She had been late getting her prescription filled, and we had been so caught up in the moment the past few weeks that I hadn’t always wrapped Jax Jr.

“So…You are then?” I asked. She shook her head, handing me the test. 

“Not this time, Big Papa; just one blue line, not two.”

We both breathed a sigh of relief. Yes, I can’t wait to be a dad, but we just weren’t in the right place in our relationship for a little Teller.

Later that night, we were snuggled up in bed.

“My prescription is filled. I’ll pick it up tomorrow,” Amber said.

“And I’ll pick up another box of rubbers tomorrow, too,” I responded, kissing her forehead.

“You know,” Amber began, “I think why our sex life has been so good the past few months, even before the genie thing… I’m not using sex anymore to escape like I was last year. Yes, it was still good, and I got fulfillment from it, but I wasn’t doing it for the wrong reasons.”

“I know, it doesn't make sense,” she chuckled, looking up at me.

“No, it does, because like we talked about, at one point, that was the only time your demons weren’t screaming at you,” I whispered, running my fingers down her arm.

“Stress—that would be why I’m late. Work has been stressful.”

“Ah, so that’s why you asked me to treat you like a screen door when you got home yesterday.”

“Yes,” she laughed, her face turning a little red. “Being spanked while being called your good girl took the stress away,” Amber said with blushed cheeks.

“What, you still can’t believe you like being spanked?” I laughed.

She nodded, her face still red. “Hey, if it gets the job done, I’ll do it every time if you like.”

“I mean… I could get a paddle.”

She shook her head and laughed. “It’s the skin-on-skin contact for me.”

[capillaryspice]

Unpopular opinion rant incoming:

I did not enjoy Baldurs Gate 3

Before anything else I will admit I am biased, as strategy turn based games aren't something I'm usually into to begin with. I mostly ended up playing it because my partners and a friend are SUPER into the game and wanted to do a 4 player run. I do have 30 hours on a solo run I tried to get used to the game with, so I have a decent bit of experience with how it's supposed to run as a single player but I'm not judging companion stories or anything because I haven't completed them.

I do understand why people like BG3, and I don't wanna rain on anyone's parade for a very critically acclaimed game, but I do have some thoughts that I just need to get out of my head, so if you like the game and don't wanna hear me complain about it just scroll on ahead. If you do want to hear me complain, I'd love to hear if anyone else has had the same thoughts, because genuinely I've not really had anyone to talk to that hasn't been head-over-heels for it. (Actual thoughts under the cut)

-----------------

With that out of the way, for starters BG3 is a very impressive game. From a technical perspective, from a voice acting quality perspective, the sheer amount of tiny tiny details, etc... it is IMPRESSIVE. Too impressive, I'd almost have to say. Because, despite being impressed by it, I did not have FUN playing the game. For all its details it doesn't draw me in. For all the technical marvel, it's just too janky. It's all of the rules of DND and none of the immersion or fun

I would love to have had a functioning camera position that didn't give me whiplash whenever a new character in the combat of 20+ NPCs decides to do so much as shuffle to the left. It feels like pulling teeth when trying to select/interact with anything, god forbid a reaction happens while you're trying to attack and you just completely lose the action bc the interruption to movement pauses everything and screws u up. I'd love to be able to jump without going through two menu screens and a map to just hop over a gap(I'm never complaining about the Dark Souls jump being too complicated ever again). Also everything moves so slow, I would kill for a fucking Sprint button.

I would have liked anything approaching a streamlined combat system that didn't take a long ass time to set up a move that takes six seconds to play out, and then wait for ten minutes literally doing nothing while the rest of the NPCs in initiative whip the viewpoint around and get it stuck in walls and corpses so I can't even see what's happening while I can't do anything for the rest of the round

A lesser gripe, but just a bizarre choice to not do: Id like to hear the character voice I chose in character creation for cutscenes, instead of just background ambient lines. Like, if the last dragon age game (from 2014 mind you) can have a voiced main character with multiple voice options, this new game that has unique voice lines for every goddamn squirrel on the map and ALREADY PAID VOICE ACTORS TO VOICE THE MAIN CHARACTER TO BEGIN WITH can probably afford to do so. Hell, I'd like some background music that isn't just the tenth rendition of Down By The River in a different key. The bard music is all gorgeous, why couldn't they have reused some of those compositions as ambient music for different locations?

This is a MASSIVE game, and what they've put into it is definitely admirable, but like. Not in the ways that make a game breathable or immersive? The choices in where they've decided to dedicate the anal level of detail seems misguided from a just general player standpoint; There's some gorgeous settings in the game, but I was distracted every time by getting frustrated that I couldn't even get a more-than-vague look at any of the scenery I actually enjoyed because the camera is so limited in its angles. So I can't take a good look around what should be a beautiful temple that I'd love to see closer, but I can individually inspect every moldy apple and tax form on a random dinner table instead. It's a vast open world, but the character models have very clearly defined paths they have to stay within. The amount of unique NPCs is insane, but the mechanics themselves TREAT them as NPCs(i.e., resurrection rules), and they don't react to PCs unless ur doing Violence or Crimes (even og skyrim had NPCs have comments on if u weren't like wearing clothes, for instance). Every shelf and bag and nook and cranny are searchable, but that gets overwhelming very quickly as you have to choose between taking like an hour of real time to clear a cluttered area and possibly find something important but more likely just end up with a bajillion rotten carrots, or move on but have the anxiety of knowing you've possibly missed something vital. There's a million options you can take at any moment with any object or character, but there's rarely anything indicating what will be vital later for general world stuff. But then with the main plot (the Emperor, Raphael, the crèche) it felt very railroaded in the sense that TECHNICALLY you could try and choose between outcomes, but your choices don't actually matter because you die if you choose The Wrong Option (or end up in effectively death sentence combat) and will end up where they want you to go regardless.

BG3 isn't a game I want to spend time playing; it's not a world I can wander around and appreciate the beauty of and get lost in the soundtrack or the environments. The whole combat system is incredibly frustrating to manage, and just feels like Hurry Up And Wait. I'm not gonna knock the romance parts of the game, I've heard good things and haven't gotten far enough in any of em to have an educated opinion on, so really the only thing the game has to offer in spades OTHER than romance is replayability. Which normally I would say is a good thing, but for how long of a game it is and how non immersive the gameplay and world feel, it really just ends up being a game of fucking around and seeing how many things you can get an alternate dialogue for or create new stats around. Like, this is great for completionist folks who love collecting achievements and making the most busted crunchy math-based builds possible, but Baldurs Gate 3 to me just isn't a game I can sit down and have Fun(TM) relaxing and playing.

It's a game that I feel absolutely missed the forest for the trees.

So anyways, essay complete. I've only slept like 6 hours total in the last three days so a lot of this may or may not even make sense. But on so much sleep deprivation finishing this game and realizing I was just frustrated with it instead of actually feeling accomplished for having finished it, it was the final straw and I just needed to get the thoughts down somewhere

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk

[clumsiestgiantess]

Third chapter of Alexis & Erica’s story (I think I’m going to start calling it the other-world universe because that’s what I tag it as). The final intro chapter. Woah, another new ability?

all chapters linked here

[Two figures, one dark alley]

I made my way to the city again.  This time I took the proper amount of caution, because if I'm honest with myself, I wasn't paying all that much attention to where I was stepping before.  However, the closer I got to the city, the harder it was to find some open space.  In fact, the buildings were almost literally within my reach, but I had no way to get any closer without carving a path right through them.  Most of the larger buildings on the outskirts of the city only came to chest height.  Still, that was tall enough to stop me in my tracks.  I stood on my tiptoes, trying to scout out any signs of a giant robot battle like the one Liam created yesterday, but there wasn't a single piece of evidence that anything was out of place.

As I shifted my weight to one leg so I could see around an office building, the pavement of the empty lot I was standing in cracked beneath me.  I flinched, kneeling down to examine the shattered concrete below.  Am I really that heavy?  “Giant robots are invading!”  I scrambled to my feet in an instant.  My brother’s story is happening now!?  I looked around wildly, trying to spot who had yelled.  With all the tall city buildings, it was hard to get a clear view of everything around me.  I was used to a bit more open space.  Now, my vision was constantly obscured, but I tried my best to find out what was happening.

Rushing down an empty street as carefully as I could manage, I found a view of the highway into the city.  An explosion pictured on an electronic billboard dragged my eyes away from the busy road.  Large robots walked in thematic slow motion as the screen faded out.  The board announced: “See the new movie from the Battlebots universe, in theaters now!”  I took a relieved breath as I watched the preview switch with an insurance ad on the billboard's display.  My brother's stories were only movies, not reality.  There was no mass destruction, no horrible demise of the human race.  That's a relief.

The sun was already sinking below the horizon; I'd spent a lot more time than I realized finding a pathway out to the city.  I thought about leaving, but I’d come all that way.  Why not enjoy the city lights while I’m here?  Carefully checking the lot I’d come from, I sat down for a while and watched the city come to life for the night.  It was a nice break from everything that had happened in the world so far.  For once I had a moment to myself to enjoy without having to dodge vehicles, people, or houses.  This is great, I thought happily, time is stopped in my world right now.  I could come here and do whatever I like for as long as I want without any consequences.  If I wanted to, I could even sit here and do nothing for days and it would only take a few seconds in my own world.

I don't know how long I sat there for, but eventually I got up to leave.  The sun had long disappeared, and I was getting bored.  Just as I picked myself up, I heard something crash to the ground.  Standing frozen halfway bent, I looked for what caused the noise, fearing I'd broken something again.  "Uggh, let go of me you-!"  I quickly stood straight up, searching for the source of the voice.  My search led me to a run-down club a few blocks away and two people fighting in the alley beside it.  It was almost completely dark in the part of the alleyway I could see, and I didn’t have room to bend down either.  Despite my best efforts, I couldn't make out their appearances.  "This is the last straw, I'm done."  It was the voice I'd heard in the empty lot.  "What do you mean you're done?" another voice asked.  It was gruffer, more masculine.  "I mean you can go rot in hell you psycho!  I'm done dealing with your shit.  I can't stand another second of your fucked up little game where I hopelessly try to please you!  Is this where you've been sneaking off to?  You know what, I don't care.  I'm done.  Goodbye and good riddance!"  I don't know what I just stumbled upon, but by the sound of it, nothing good.  

It might be best for me to just leave; pretend I didn't see anything.  Slowly, I began backing away into the street.  "Where do you think you're going?"  For a brief moment, I thought the gruff voice was referring to me and I flinched.  Instead, the owner of the voice grabbed the other person and yanked them back into the alley, sending them crashing against a dumpster.  "What the hell, you could’ve broken my arm!" yelped the one who'd been pulled back.  The violent one sneered, "I'm going to break more than just your arm by the time I'm done with you!"  "What!?"  I spun around, watching as one hulking figure approached the other, halfway on the ground.  This little fight was going too far.  I had to stop him, but how?  I wanted to pick the threatening person up and throw them full force into the city, but I couldn’t just go around attacking people, even if they might deserve it.  

That's when it hit me.  If the smaller world is a recreation of the one on the kids table in mine, I could play out this argument any way I want like Liam can, only it’ll be real for me, because I’m the one who can use the table.  In seconds I was back in my own world, searching frantically for what might have been the place I'd seen.  Try as I might, I couldn’t find it.  The little building probably hadn’t made the cut for the model city.  However, through other buildings around it, I was able to gauge where the place would’ve been in the model.  I reached for the alleyway beside it, picturing the place in my head, and the whole table phased out before me, unveiling the other-world.  Briefly my fingers fell through open air before meeting the back of the man, who was turned away from me.  He had the other person’s arm gripped tightly in his hand, but once I touched him, he froze in place.  

My nerves spiked before I realized I was still invisible.  What the-  What happened?  Can I not change things like my brother?  I cautiously pulled my hand away and the man stepped backwards with it, still strangely frozen.  Huh.  Uncertainly, I used one finger to move his arm and make him pick up an empty can on the ground nearby.  I kneeled down, thoroughly shocked, leaving him frozen in place.  It's like a puppet on a string, I realized.  This is so much more than what my brother can do.  And so much worse.  I didn't particularly like the idea of controlling people like that.  Not only were the man’s movements weird and unnatural, it just felt wrong.

"John?"  The other person had gotten up, likely confused with his sudden strange movements.  ("I uh, I have to go now.")  I said quickly while turning him towards the parking lot.  Apparently I can speak through them too.  The man, John apparently, had said the same thing I had just as I said it.  I walked him a good distance away from the other person in the alley, but as I walked, I’d grazed the side of a building while I wasn’t looking.  I turned quickly in horror, expecting part of it to come crumbling away, but it was completely unscathed.  My side had passed directly through the building.  

While I was controlling one of these small people, my whole form became strangely intangible.  I tested this on cars in the lot.  Each one passed through my outstretched hand.  After testing out my new ability on a few other objects, I finally let the man go, willing him to drive away afterwards.  It worked, and I watched him look around confusedly, get in his car, and leave.  A quick swipe at a signpost proved that I was no longer intangible.  It fell to the ground at my touch.  I returned to my own world shortly after he drove out of sight and spent the rest of the day at home, sorting through what I'd learned.

My life then became an uncertain divide between worlds.  Spending too much time in either place bored me.  Whenever I got tired of one place I would slip seamlessly into the other.  After finding my strange new ability to control unsuspecting people, I’d decided I would only use it if absolutely necessary.  Using the tiny people like puppets felt a bit too invasive, even if they were just plastic figures.  Besides, what would I even do with them?  

The other-world was a lot easier for me to traverse now, too.  I spent most of my days practicing dodging houses, cars, and the like.  Not to brag, but I was getting pretty good.  The whole process was akin to a game of Twister or hopscotch.  Of course there were some mishaps.  People walking or driving around couldn’t see me, so every once and a while something or someone would travel directly into or underneath my feet.  Cars were the biggest problem.  Driving at a high speed directly into an invisible wall such as myself probably wasn't great, but I couldn’t really stop them.  A visual warning would completely counter the whole invisibility trick I needed to prevent everyone from freaking out.

I returned to the same empty lot that I had sat in to watch everything a few days prior — again finding that it was the closest I could get to the city.  Standing there unable to go any further, I watched again as everything began to light up for the night.  Neon lights flickered awake and large skyscrapers cast grand displays that lit up their sides.  The rushing cheers of a large crowd suddenly erupted from one side of the city.  There must be a game in the stadium tonight.  

A massive congregation was gathered in and around the football stadium to my left; cheers and music echoed from it.  Stepping over smaller buildings, I started off in that direction to try and watch.  I remember when my dad got the stadium set.  He was planning on re-selling it for more than he bought it for, but my brother insisted on having it, so it ended up as his birthday present instead.  The stadium was in an entirely different spot on the table than it was in the city, though.  Probably because we’d moved it around so many times; it was a big set and took up a lot of table space.

It was mind boggling to think that the plastic recreation from my world and the large steel structure in this one could possibly be the same thing, but they had to be.  Despite the variety of differences, they were both so eerily similar to each other.  I made my way over through parking lots and whatnot, shuffling across the outskirts of the city.  On my way through its rougher edges I came across the club from a few days earlier.  I couldn't have cared less about finding it again had it not been for a familiar voice shouting and laughing and definitely drunk.

I sighed, stepping closer.  It was the same voice I'd heard in the alleyway, the person I hadn't controlled.  Under the streetlights I could see that she was a young woman, probably in her early 20’s or so, with subtly dark skin and curled mahogany brown hair.  She shuffled over to what might’ve been her car, except when she tried to unlock it, a car further down the lot beeped instead.  However, she persisted trying to open the one she was already at, setting off the car’s alarm.  

A cop car pulled into the parking lot shortly after, and found her there.  By the time they pulled up, the young woman had given up using her key, and was trying to force the door open through brute strength instead.  Suffice to say, she didn't get very far.  The cops managed to get her into the back of their cruiser, saying something about how she was 'attempting to drive under alcoholic influence' or something like that.  Intrigued, I followed the car as best I could.  I managed to get all the way to a county police station, where the young woman disappeared into the building with the two officers.  

Well, I have all the time I want, and I'm curious to see how this plays out.  I waited the night by the station, leaning cautiously on the side of the building.  Finally, just as the sun had cleared away the dark of night, the young woman came storming back out of the station.  “Fuck, how did I let myself get that drunk?” she muttered as she walked past me to a bus stop by the road.  I carefully pushed myself away from the building so it didn’t collapse, and inched closer to the stop across the parking lot.  “Can’t believe this, now I have a stupid fine to pay on top of my rent that I already can’t pay anyways.”  I could help her, I realized while she complained.  I can easily get the money she needs from my brother's space bank heist set.  

The set was the newest addition to my brother’s collection.  I remembered that it came with miniature ATMs that held tons of fake bills.  There's a bunch of money I could easily take for her.  Maybe then I'll stop running into her problems when I'm here.  I waited until she got on the bus and followed it back to the club, where she found that her actual car had been towed.  "Can this day get any worse!?"

Thinking back to the night before, I tried to remember what her car looked like, the one that had beeped when she tried to open the wrong door.  I always stop in a towing yard on the way to this spot.  It was fenced in and open enough for me to stand in comfortably, so I would stop there to take a breather and find another open space.  Her car had to be there somewhere.  Following the path I’d taken earlier, I came to the tow yard and found her car parked close to the entrance, just as I'd suspected.  How am I supposed to get this thing back, though?  I can always control someone to get it.  I thought for a moment.  Did this situation count as an emergency?  Not really, but I'm only helping out like I did last time.  In the end, I snagged one of the workers and had him tow the car back to the club's parking lot.  When I returned, I found the young woman back at the bus stop.  I had the tow truck driver leave the car where it had been parked the other night and drive away.

I realized then that the young woman hadn't noticed her car was back yet.  After thinking of a way to get her attention, I grabbed the dumpster from the alley and brought it down hard on the ground a bit beyond where the car was parked.  She whirled around at the sudden noise.  "What the-  Is that..?  That's my car!  But, it's- How? I swear that wasn't there before."  She ran over to it from across the lot and practically jumped in.  I watched her drive off and followed her back to the apartment where she lived.  

Finally leaving her off there, I returned to my own world in search of the bank heist set.  Eventually, I found it amongst the boxes of other sets and board games piled high on a shelf.  I opened it up and dug through it, searching for the tiny stickers that read ATM.  When I found one and tore it open, a pile of tiny plastic bills came tumbling out.  Perfect.  Hmm, I wonder if I'm robbing a space world's bank right now...  Nah, I don't think deep space banks are real, I thought, chuckling to myself.  That’s too crazy even for the smaller world, plus this thing isn’t on the table.

Back at the apartment building, I realized I didn’t know where the young woman lived to put away the money.  I sat squished in an old baseball field behind her building to think.  That small area was the only place remotely big enough for me to fit in, so I would have to make it work.  Finally, I remembered how I could go through solid objects while I was attached to someone.  Huh, I guess it's useful for more than just controlling people.  

Forgetting about my self-made rules, I grabbed a person walking by and had them stand by the building while I peered in.  It was mid-morning now, and most people were at work or someplace else.  I found her room easily, it was one of the few that still had someone in it, and left the person I'd controlled to continue wherever they were headed.  Carefully, I slid open the young woman's balcony door and eased the money down inside once she left the room, trying not to break anything.  I was only a bit shocked to find that the plastic bills had transformed into real paper money when I crossed worlds.  After double checking I hadn't left any clues to where the money came from, I headed back to my own world, satisfied with what I’d done.  

Sometimes I still wonder about that day.  Why I decided to help her out of the hundreds of other people I'd encountered in the other-world.  Life went on as usual after that, I took a break from one world to deal with the other.  At school I realized I undoubtedly had the coolest life of everyone there, and I couldn't tell anyone.  Though, come to think of it, I didn’t really want to.  Apart from the slight hints of days when I canceled all my plans and snuck away to the basement, there was no way for anyone to suspect the truth.  Was it selfish of me to keep the discovery of a whole other world to myself?  Maybe, but the other-world was much more comforting when I was there alone.  Well, alone with the millions of people who live there.  But they don't count, they aren’t real anyways.

[chen-chen-chen-again-chen]

For the WIP Game! (I went and updated the original post so it has links to all the answers, if folks want to check those out. Sometimes my brain good!)

@you-remind-me-of-the-babe asked me about the WIP called Will suck dick for books! 😆😆 I did not anticipate that folks would ask about works in fandoms they are not familiar with but I am LIVING FOR IT~~

I'm also going to go ahead and tag @fatalfangirl here because (methinks??) you have partaken of the Haikyuu. Going to also tag @thewesterndoor because YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID lolol jkjk who got me into Haikyuu and whose Take/Ukai fics I ADORE.

Fandom background: Haikyuu!! is an earnest and hilarious volleyball anime where everyone is gay and chaotic and loveable. It's SO SO GOOD and like all sports anime, it is not necessarily just about sport but about FEELINGS~

Pairing background: Takeda Ittetsu/Ukai Keishin

Takeda (Take-chan): looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually kill you, English teacher, glasses nerd, his superpower is bowing at like 1000 km/h, head coach but he knows nothing about volleyball at the beginning of the series (he just stepped in to fill a void b/c he a good human), cries easily, tries to use poetry to motivate high school athletes, terrifyingly good at holding his liquor, in my headcanon he's a beast in the sack

Ukai: looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll, Reformed Gangster Vibes, in his late 20s but his energy is always Kids Get Off My Lawn, lightweight, easily manipulated by cute English teacher into coaching a high school volleyball team even though he has full time jobs running a convenience store and helping out w/ the family farm because (in this fic) he's Weak for Dat Ass

The fic: a canon-adjacent and canon-compliant take on (some of) the events in the series, but focused on the relationship between Takeda/Ukai, these baby adults who have somehow accidentally co-adopted 14 chaotic teens.

There's fake dating, nerding out about books, soft boyfriends being super soft and domestic, dating/married even if they don't realize it, and a backstory involving writing your phone number in the back of a book, lending it to a hot stranger, and somehow running into them seven years later.

U want a snippet? here's a snippet. I has lots of snippets. (This bad boy is sitting at like 75% in my drafts folder):

"Look, are you going to buy something or not?"

"Are you going to coach the boys' volleyball team?"

"No. You should try a meat bun, they're pretty good." 

The Nice New Teacher buys a pizzaman, which is kind of adorable. "I'll come back," he says, but it's hard for him to sound threatening around a mouthful of steamed bun. 

And another, a little later on:

Keishin's gotten used to being accosted by the Nice New Teacher every few days, so he's a little weirded out by a sudden radio silence. In that time, he reviews the store inventory, decides to implement a new organization system for the frozen foods, and even washes the windows. It's a slow couple of days, okay? 

He literally just finishes throwing GunGun bars at a couple of punks from the volleyball team - the one with the shaved head catches the protein bar in his teeth, what the hell is Take-chan teaching them - when the store phone starts ringing. 

"Lo, Sakanoshita Market." 

"Ukai-kun!" Take-chan exclaims. He sounds breathless and excited, as if he's been eager to talk to Keishin all day, which is kinda adorable and - weird, Keishin corrects himself, weird, and not adorable, and definitely not a little bit charming. 

"You again," Keishin sighs, as if he's got about fifty million other things that he could be doing with his time, instead of re-reading One Piece. 

And then later, after Keishin's ass is well and truly Trapped:

"Er, thanks," Takeda says, flushing.  "I, ah, as you can see, I… I have a lot of books." 

"Do I need to stage an intervention, Sensei?" 

Takeda scratches the back of his head. "My mother was a librarian," he says, laughing a little. "So I come by it honestly." 

Keishin finds himself squinting at a silver flask resting between a bunch of cookbooks. There's writing on it in English, in fancy Gothic lettering, and he manages to just make out Will suck d- before Takeda suddenly materializes there, his smile very bright. 

"Hope you don't mind red pepper, there's a lot of it in the yakisoba!" Takeda says, his voice a bit higher than usual. "We should eat!"

THANK YOU for letting me blather about this fic in a fandom other than Carry On, LOLOLOL!!! It's so fun to come back to this and definitely makes me excited to FINALLY FINISH AT SOME POINT THIS YEAR RAWR~

[blackiraven]

This story was written a long time ago and was gathering dust in my archives. So I decided to share this with you😘

The last riddle.

Everything was so quiet. The thick cold walls absorbed all possible sound. Silence and loneliness dug sharp claws and teeth into the soul, and billions of thoughts filled the brain to the brim and literally poured into reality in the form of many drawings on any hard, empty and accessible surfaces. Numbers, formulas, diagrams, maps, plans, questions and just words. If I keep everything in head all the time, then their framework is lost, they get mixed up and stand in front of my eyes all the time. In the meaningless mass of information generated every second, all voices are silenced, silhouettes and faces are drowned. The reaction to all living beings and influencing factors disappears, only the environment can be analyzed. This happens gradually, as if the main functions of the body are switched off one by one, and I fall into a coma, where only I and my mind are. Anything can be fished out of this stream: formulas of eternal life and medicines for all diseases, new chemical elements and laws of physics, drawings of a perpetual motion machine and a source of infinite energy, the truth, due to which absolutely everything exists. I just need to reach out and grab any piece, then another, and another, and another, and eventually collect the whole picture of the universe and get the knowledge I want. I can do it, I'm the only one who can do it. But… they tied my hands tight. Again! They were pumped me up again with cocktails of drugs that there was no living place left on my hands, but only bruises. They were nailed me alive again in a concrete coffin for slow and painful rotting under the influence of chemicals and my own disorderly thoughts. I see, but I can't make it out, there are too many multiplying characters. Symbols flow visibly from the ceiling, quickly replace oxygen atoms, getting into my lungs, and then into poisoned blood, ooze from the food brought and float in a glass of water, get under the skin, demand to study themselves, paint, calculate, embody. I was pressed into a corner like a trapped animal. I can't sleep, eat, drink, breathe. I choke and choke on them. My personal circle of Hell, my nameless grave, and symbols and signs are my corruption.

How long has it been like this? A day, two, or a year? Or maybe just a few seconds after arriving here? What's going on out there? A huge bat once again eats the flesh of the fallen? Sucks their blood with thick fangs, grinds bones with a bottomless mouth and enjoys every cry and plea. His huge belly will never be filled, hunger and thirst will not subside. He will look for new and new victims and torment the old ones, which I am. You can drink all my juices, squeeze out all my blood, knock out my life… my teeth. Continue to carry the punishment through your weapon, Dark Knight. But, I ask everyone and everyone who hears me at the moment, do not let him find him. Don't let him touch my…

Everything was so quiet. The thick cold walls absorbed all possible sound. Until it was cut through by a loud explosion and the subsequent alarm. The whole shroud fell off, the numbers and letters eroded through the cell door that opened by itself. I saw surging crowds of freed and falling from their hands inhumans in white coats. Shots rang out, shouts and laughter rang out. Finally. My new ingenious plan worked, and the bombs installed in the right places worked successfully. It remains to wait quite a bit. The bat won't have time to catch up with me. After a long coma, the long-awaited awakening took place.

After a while, one of those dressed in the snow-white armor of Gotham medicine came running to my cell. In a hurry and constantly looking around, he began to untangle me from the straitjacket. Near his feet lay my cane with a knob in the shape of a question mark, brought like a faithful dog. I knew they wouldn't have time to take it to the station as evidence. When my hands stopped being squeezed by tight straps, I immediately grabbed the special weapon and got up from the floor.

"M-Mr. Nygma… I-I did everything you said. Does our d-deal still stand?" the sent agent stuttered in fright, backing away from me. You can buy any thing in Gotham, life and opinion, the only question is the price.

"The answer suggests itself. But in order not to be suspected of betrayal, we need to stage an attack." having caught my balance, I slowly approach him with a prepared cane.

"What?! No, please!"

"I'll get in touch with you. Later." not wanting to waste any more limited time, I swung and hit my own agent on the head. Blood sprayed, and the body fell in amazement, without even having time to squeal. The blow is not strong, he will survive and be fine, but there may be a scar. It's more plausible this way. Consider this my gratitude for the work done.

With a bloody cane at the ready, I merged with a raging and partially armed crowd rushing to freedom or some other goals. The only picture of violence that I admire every time. How doctors and guards are subjected to bloody and cruel revenge from those whom they once bullied without feeling guilty. How the equipment that brings pain, called "treatment", breaks down. How the lids of all coffins are broken out, from where hatred, anger, malice and rage of those buried early come out. It's hard to restrain yourself at such moments. The mouth automatically begins to shout out the riddles invented during the imprisonment to the first comer. He, of course, is not able to solve them, for which he receives a deafening blow and sheds his blood.

"You can't see me, hear me, smell me, but everyone wants to feel me! Who am I?!"

"How many obstacles will you not erect, you will not kill me! Who am I?!"

"I can be with both the living and the dead man! Who am I?!"

Knowing the structure and location of all big complexes by heart, along a pre-built path, I was able to get to the new exit that appeared with my "small" help in the form of a hole in the main wall. All the patients actively broke out, suppressing the opposition from the hospital security. They always lose, as if such cases had never happened before. While the cops are coming here, I will have time to get to the city through the forest, at the entrance to which a package with ordinary outerwear and shoes was hidden under a marked stone, so as not to attract attention later. Hiding a straitjacket under a long raincoat made of expensive fabric, putting my frozen bare feet in comfortable patent leather shoes, and my hands in leather gloves, and lifting an elegant bowler hat on my combed hair with a comb in my pocket, I rush into the depths of the forest, simultaneously putting on new glasses and wiping the blood from the cane with a clean handkerchief. It's too early for you to see me like this…

The dark coniferous forest was replaced by a dimly lit stone one. So empty and vulnerable, because all the protection is focused on the damn Arkham. Clouds were gradually gathering overhead, blocking the view of the bright moon from the chaos and disorder going on below.

Dead end. An ordinary brick wall with no way. For the others. I take a tiny key out of my secret breast pocket and find the same inconspicuous hole in one fake brick. Click. A solid secret door opened. The stairs behind it led to several more doors, already metal. In order to open them, special alphanumeric and numeric passwords are needed, plus in some cases it is necessary to choose the right door to reach the main lair of Riddler in one piece. So that no one can get to you, hurt you… Instead of the sickening smell and smoke of the streets, I was accompanied by a pale green light and the squeak of push-buttons, and the brick wall itself closed tightly behind me.

All the obstacles that I personally constructed went through without difficulty. It remained to go through the last and easiest – a simple door of typical apartments. Which I did. A light, soothing gloom greeted me and invited me into a room made like a living room. The only faded light of the TV made it possible to see the proper interior and furniture. The screen was full of headlines and reports about the explosions in Arkham and mass escapes of "especially dangerous criminals." As always, the same thing. Exclusive footage with "our beautiful hero and savior, bringing justice." Aren't they tired of broadcasting about it themselves? Right on the threshold, I threw off all my disguise, left my cane and walked with quiet steps into my cozy house. On the table next to the empty sofa lay various parts, tools and something resembling a simple wind-up device. There were also sheets with drawings drawn by hand with felt-tip pens. So childish, but also diligently serious. I take the object in my hands and look at it from all sides, at the same time looking at the colorful drawings. Hmm, almost done, but it looks like you're confused about the last details. I dug out a pencil on the table and corrected the numbering of parts in some places. Now you will definitely finish it. Leaving a small workplace, I go into my personal office, where it is forbidden to enter anyone but me. The first thing I do is turn on the main power, all the monitors hanging on the walls and the main computer, behind which my work proceeds. While the whole office was activated, I decided to check the bedroom. In total darkness, on the edge of the bed, with his legs dangling, a small lump was sleeping soundly, and his hands were holding a thick book about mechanics and engineering, read almost to the middle.

"Leslie… " I whispered to myself with a share of joy and, tiptoeing closer, stroked his head. In response, the sleeping child only softly sniffed. After putting the book away, I take the warm little body in my arms, hug him lightly so as not to wake up, and sit down on the bed. You continue to study even in my absence. You read, invent, design, assemble by yourself. Well done, my boy. I am so pleased to observe this process, but I don't want to demonstrate it. I want to be a strict teacher for you, show little pity, thereby tempering you and preparing you for everything possible. After all, the world is full of cruelty, especially this city. But you're so cute, so funny, energetic, diligent, hardworking, innocent. Like you coming from another world. Gotham doesn't deserve you… Sometimes I want to just drop everything and become a caring parent for you, replace that filthy family, start a new life and dedicate it to you. But, all my thoughts, plans, ideas, I can't bury them, they have to come true! I can't leave everything at once, I can't! Riddler must mentally and physically defeat the bat! Must feel his stupidity, helplessness and worthlessness in front of me! And then crush! And for everyone to see it! See all his shame, his loss! His undisclosed cheating! To be praised, feared, and finally recognized me as the only genius! I cannot retreat! And then… I already have a new meaning. Its you, Leslie… Therefore, it is necessary to protect you. I am very used to you, you have become almost my own son for me, which I never even thought about. I did not consider such events possible. I will train you, educate you, take care of you, even if I find myself locked away again. You love my views and opinions – I will continue to express them. This means that all my efforts are not in vain. If I am destined to lose and be beheaded by the Dark Knight, I will die physically, but my soul will continue to live. It will remain in you, Leslie. It is you who will not let Riddler disappear… The answer to my most important and last riddle in my life - is Leslie. And you won't solve it, Batman! I won't let you…

These few minutes have completely and truly cured me. It became very good and calm. Thirst returned, the desire to eat, rest, my breathing returned to normal. The bruises next to the veins on my hands stopped hurting, and the blood stopped burning the body, having been cleansed of medical poisons. Now I feel life. Thank you, Leslie. Alright, I won't put your sleep at risk anymore. Take a break, at your age it is much more necessary than me. And I will continue the interrupted work. Or I'll start something new! There are so many plans in my head. I carefully put the child on the bed, cover him with a blanket and, taking the first soft toy that comes along, carefully place it in his hands. While the bat is busy, Riddler will have time to set traps for the rodent everywhere. Before leaving the bedroom occupied by the boy with my permission, my eyes caught the drawings hanging on the walls. He loves to draw so much. Most of the drawings depicted my return from Arkham, where a boy joyfully greets me, but none corresponded to a real return. But you'll still be glad, only in the morning. For the sake of this moment, I will wait for the first rays of the sun. To check all your accumulated knowledge, give new tasks, check the completed ones and compare the learning results. I believe in you. I'm proud of you…

[luckyduck0]

𝗅𝗎𝖼𝖾𝗇𝗍

－

Xen really didn’t know what to do.

Though, that wasn’t a surprise to anyone.

So, to recap, she was hit by some weird comet-like thing, and it turned her into…well…this.

Green hair that apparently can catch on fire but not burn, neon green eyes that Sandy thinks might shoot lasers, and finally, she can fly.

“Sandy! Help me get down!” Xen wailed, acidic tears rolling down her face as she hit the ceiling.

“I’m—ugh,” Sandy groaned, avoiding a stray drop of acid-tear that melted straight threw the floor. “I’m trying! Just— calm down!”

More tears streamed down her face, and she felt half-bad for freaking Sandy out, but also, she was literally turning into a…thing!!

How could she not panic and cry?! Like, her tears are acidic now!

“It’s really not that bad! I saw a guy with like, chicken feet or something! At least you’re still you!” Sandy assured.

“It isn’t the same! My hair is on fire!”

Sandy groaned, looking toward the door where Nyxx was.

“Hey, you just gonna stand there and be useless? Come over here and help me!” The girl nagged, glaring at the other.

Nyxx only blinked, seeming a bit weary. “The extraction team will be here soon to help, so we should just try to keep her from blowing up.”

“Extrac— what?! What the hell is an extraction team?!”

“They’re really the only people able to help her right now, since she’s a bit of a liability right now.” Nyxx explained, ignoring Sandy’s spiraling.

Before she could say anything else, people in something close to hazmat suits came rushing in past.

Sandy didn’t even have time to comprehend before they were setting down some triangle thing, which unleashed a weird tech-y looking rope that dragged Xen down. Then, the rest of it turned into a cage, trapping her inside.

“What are you doing?!” Sandy screamed, pounding her fist on the cage. “Let her go!”

“Sandy, stop.” Nyxx demanded, coming up behind her and holding her back under the arms.

Sandy only kicked, nothing but fear and rage fueling her mind and actions.

“Get off me, bastard!”

Suddenly, a thick pink mist clouded the room, exploding from the hall. The anger she felt just seconds before disappears with the fog, leaving only a mild sense of disorientation in her senses.

A sigh, then, “Thanks, EVA.”

Sandy had not time to react before she was drug back to a chair to sit. She could barely stand, much less notice the team of weirdos take her friend out of the room.

Xen, meanwhile, was curled into a ball. Tears continued to run down her face, and she was lucky enough the be able to wipe them away. The people who were taking her away weren’t slow at all, as the moved with impressive speed.

All she could focus on, however, was just how ruined her life was. Her hair was on fire, her tears are burn through stuff, she can fly, and probably a shit ton of other things that will make everyone avoid her. And just when she was starting to get settled too…

She wanted to scream, and rage and throw a fit like a child. But she couldn’t.

Whatever had happened, it nearly killed her.

The idea of even going outside now, was terrifying.

On the outside, the team was making twists and turns, and Xen was pretty sure they went down an elevator at one point. That is, until they put her in a room. Minutes passed with the cage still glowing around her, but was finally removed.

The room she was in was almost stark white, with nothing but a small bed inside.

“Where am I?” Xen shivered, looking around wildly.

“Apologies, but this is the only way we can assure both your safety and ours for the time being.” A voice called out, coming from the ceiling.

Xen noticed a camera in the corner, and instinctually backed away.

“Please I— I don’t know what’s going on. You have to help me.”

The voice returned. “Of course, that’s what we’re here for. Just try to relax for now, we’ll be sending in Dr. Stein shortly to run some tests.”

Stein? Tests? What are they talking about?

“Wait! Who- who are you?”

“My name is Gideon, I’m EDEN’s most developed and effective AI.”

Okay. Great.

What does that mean?

Xen didn’t respond, and instead curled in on herself. If she was gonna be stuck in some room to get tested on, she might as well be comfortable.

—

Coming back to her senses, Sandy was instantly raged.

“What the FUCK?!” She shouted, shooting up and looking around crazily.

“Relax there, kid.” Mustang chided, blowing smoke out of the window.

Sandy turned to him, eye twitching. “Why the hell are you here? No, wait, actually, where is Xen? Tell me. Now.”

“Is that how you ask?”

Glaring, Sandy took a deep breath. “Please tell me where Xen is, fuckface.”

Mustang nearly choked, holding back a laugh. “Well, you certainly are spitfire, aren’t ya?” He chuckled.

“Now, bastard.”

“Ah, sorry kiddo, I can’t. That information is classified.”

Once again pissed off, Sandy stalked up to the older man, ripping the cigarette from his hand.

“I don’t fucking care if it’s classified, you ass, my best friend’s hair literally turned into fire. So you’re gonna tell me what the hell you guys are doing to her, and maybe, maybe, I won’t burn this whole fucking building down. Sound fair?”

Mustang stared, his eyes narrowed and slightly amused.

“Hm, guess I really don’t have a choice, huh?”

Not replying, Sandy met his stare equally, with Mustang recognizing the similar determination from his youth.

“Fine, fine, but I really can’t tell ya. Only agents and students get to know were Anomalies are put.”

“Anomalies?” Sandy raised a brow.

“Sorry, classified.” Mustang shrugged.

What the hell was this guy talking about? Anomalies? Like some alien shit? And only agents and students knew where…where the…

Widening her eyes, Sandy looked back to Mustang. “How do I become a student?”

“What?”

“A student. I need to be one here. That’s how I figure out what’s happening to Xen, right? So, what? Do I gotta, fill out an application? Take a test?” Sandy asked, rambling as many ideas popped into her head.

Mustang blinked, then while smirking, he ruffled the girl’s hair. “You’re sharper than you look, kid. Alright, ya wanna become a student.”

Ignoring the obvious lack of personal space, Sandy straightened. “Yes.”

“Then follow me. I’ve been looking for a knew lackey anyway.”

“What? You mean—”

“Yes, kid, I mean I’m gonna be teachin’ you. Now hurry up.”

Time felt like it was going too fast, and the nerves in Sandy’s body quickly stacked up. Inhaling, she grounded herself, then began to walk after the older man.

One thing at a time, Sandy, just roll with it.

—

New chapterrrrr!!!! Sort of, idk, just take it

@3xen

[neverluckygoldfish]

23 -

Lately: been sick as a dog. I hate the flu.

With that being said, I also recently blew up my entire life….in a good way ;)

I have dreamed of settling down in the PNW my entire life. And no, not because I read twilight. My soul has felt at home in the moody gray, the greenery, the culture. I had plans to do so in the next two years. But life happens (as it does) and now I’m moving in 4 weeks!! Holy shit. It feels surreal.

Do I feel like this is a totally bonkers idea? Maybe. Probably. But I don’t care because everything in me is screaming “hell yes” towards this opportunity.

It’s a big change but I feel grateful because I don’t have an urge to drink or use (wild). It’s stress, but the good kind lol.

They say don’t make any major life changes your first year in recovery….but I’ve never been good at listening anyway.

I turn 30 next year. I’m new in recovery, a newlywed, no house or real assets, barely a retirement savings, no kids (except my dog is my child and you can’t convince me otherwise), a little money in the bank, unemployed (making a career change nonetheless), and jumping into this wild change, headfirst. This is not how I pictured 30 haha.

But something I’ve come to admire about myself is my resilience. If I have ever been unhappy with my situation or desired something - I have set my sights on it and fixed/gotten it. Maybe I did it the hard way and maybe I’m (often) too stubborn to listen to advice, but I did it. No looking back. A pro of being selfish. I have never been afraid to take a bold risk, to dare greatly.

Age is just a number baby! Unless it’s less than 18.

I’ve struggled to connect with my greater She lately - once again, I’m trying to control every aspect of my life. To race against some perceived idea that I’m running out of time. That I have wasted all this time with my issues. That I’m behind.

Maybe that’s why I’m sick? If signs are real, I’ll take this as one that I need to SLOW tf down and surrender.

A friend recently told me “it sounds like you are building recovery around your life when you should be building your life around recovery”. It got me thinking. It made me pause….she’s so right. I think it’s an easy trap to fall into. Once things are good, I just race to the next thing. My foundation is fragile right now. What I do, my attitude - it determines my perspective. It sets a precedent moving forward.

I want to let go of the old me: insecure, approval seeking, people pleasing, melancholy, secretive, controlling, perfectionist. I welcome the new me who sees challenges as an adventure, who is kind not only to others but most importantly, to herself. Who lives a fulfilling life and finds joy in the stillness of every day. Who isn’t afraid to chase her dreams. Who trusts in her own capabilities. Who says fuck the haters (lol, but literally).

I am the woman in the arena. Forever.

I needed that reminder.

So yeah, big move but I am so ready. It feels like a fresh start. Also the little kid in me is like “omg eeeeee!!!!!! Check, life dream accomplished”. Energy is on overload lol.

I’m in a good headspace and at a point in my life where I’m comfortable with who I am. I’m not chasing what’s not meant for me. I’m releasing my shame. I’m learning to forgive myself. I’m staying present. I am becoming proud of the person I was / the person I am.

It’s never too late to start over. Everything can be fun, it’s all dependent on perspective. I welcome the next few months and all the adventures ahead!!!

I have faith in my intuition - my greater She. She has led me here.

Each day, a little better and brighter.

[jakekgs]

can you pls do enha’s reaction to you forgetting to say i love you to?? ☺️

enhypen (hyung line)’s reaction to, forgetting to say ‘i love you too’

i see this all the time so yes!! here’s my take :,) let me know if you want the maknae line ver <3

HEESEUNG | 희승

“babe,” he’d shout since he has no idea where you were in the apartment. “i’m heading to the store, i love you!”

“drive safe!” in your defence, the book you were currently reading was far more immersive than you had originally thought it to be, and the tension within the romance had you wanting to be able to see through the pages to get to them quicker </3

literally moments later, he’d burst open the door to your shared bedroom. catching your attention right away, and looking up you let out a small laugh at the frown line between his brows, unaware of his dilemma (wink).

“what happened?”

“…in the book or?”

“i just said i love you.” he’d look at you as though you’d just grown an extra limb in front of him.

“i know you love me… i also heard you and now i’m just confused.”

“well you didn’t say it back so.. i thought something might’ve happened.” :((( r u kidding i’m tearing up

SO MANY HUGS N KISSES FOR HIM!!! <333

JAY | 제이

“i love you, i’m sorry i have the leave in the middle of our movie marathon.” crouches down so that he can hold your hands in his, seeing as you were planning on finishing a different movie by yourself on the sofa.

“i get it, jay, really.” squeezing his hands for reassurance. “stop apologising and hurry! you’re gonna be late.”

“you’re right,” he really doesn’t want to Leave so he’ll stand up slow as hell. grabs his keys while watching you like a sad puppy :( “i love you.”

“mhm,” your gaze remained on the screen. “don’t be home too late, ‘kay? you have practice really early tomorrow–“

this boy is now standing in front of your tv.

“i— jay? hey, i’m trying to watch that!”

“y/n, i am not the person to pull this prank on.” looking up at him with pure confusion but still hitting him with your pillow.

“what prank? jay, please! i think they’re about to confess their feelings—“

“YAH! I SAID I LOVE YOU NOW SAY IT BACK!”

“I LOVE YOU TOO NOW STOP SHOUTING AN MOVE—!”

JAKE | 제이크

“y/n? i’m taking layla for her walk, you wanna come with?”

“can’t! i have too much work to catch up on!”

pretty much everyone in this situation are in different rooms and shouting okay GO WITH IT.

“alright, bye, i love you.”

“bye! stay safe!”

two puppies practically run into your room and jake throws his arms around you from behind, scaring you enough to make you drop your pen onto your desk.

“did something happen?” he’d mutter into your hair, his hands running up and down your arms comfortingly. “i can usually read you really well and i thought you were fine, stressed, but—“

“baby what are you talking about?” when you turn around in your chair he’s just stood there :( with that frown on his face :(

“please talk to me, i’m not leaving you on your own if you’re upset.”

“jake, what?”

“you didn’t say it back so i thought you were mad at me.”

SAY IT BACK. HUG HIM. KISS HIM SO HARD 💔

SUNGHOON | 성훈

“there’s my girl, did you miss me?” he’d come home from a long day of practice, finding you in the kitchen making ramen.

“no idea how i survived without you, actually.”

“i don’t love your sarcasm but i do love you,” he kisses the top of your head. “i’m gonna shower.”

“mhm.” you hum. “want me to leave you some ramen?”

he’s lingering by the door at this point, watching you closely- you of course are far too invested in the development of you long awaited ramen noodles to pay attention to him. “sure,” he’s dragging out his words by this point. “i love you.”

“mm, hurry with your shower i need to get in after you.”

looking at you all ‘🥺’ but with that frown he has when he’s confused </3 will say he loves you a couple more times but gets ignored. (note to yn: don’t do that!)

“yah! y/n!” shouts so loud and so abruptly you scream, almost dropping your ramen whilst attempting to plate it, burning yourself on the pan in the process. “baby! oh my god, i’m so sorry i—“

“it’s okay, it was an accident.” he’s holding your hand under the cold tap by this point.

“if you were mad at me, you’d tell me right?”

“what and miss the opportunity to have clingy hoon? of course i would.” moment of silence for yn’s ability to pick up on hints… “wait, wait– where’s this coming from?”

“you didn’t say it back.” “hoon, i love you more than anything.” smiles like he’d won a medal, he’s proud of himself.

“does this mean you’ll shower with me?”

i would.

masterlist, requests.

(unofficial taglist) @blessed-sky

© JAKEKGS 2022

[waka-chan-out]

Okay so I heard you were looking for requests for short stuff so do you have any headcanons for getting just. Absolutely railed by Haikyuu team captains, please and thank you. (I really love your stuff and I hope you take this!)

Rough Captain Headcanons

sub captains edition here.

you heard correctly!! (though this did not end up being very short lmaoo) i am a whore for the haikyuu captains so you’ve come to the right place. and thank you so much! i’ll take any opportunity to talk about my boys.

i included literally every single captain i could think of, including the karasuno captains after daichi and our timeskip kings. have fun.

post-timeskip, obviously.

content warnings: mostly gn! reader (but occasional fem!), lots of pet names, lots of teasing and degradation, hair pulling, spanking, three (3) creampies god i hate that word, hickies, handcuffs, etc. all of these are established relationship.

so i don’t know how to describe what exactly these headcanons are? i don’t think all of the captains are the “railing” type. however, these are basically just headcanons for when they go their hardest and either accidentally or purposefully get carried away.

Sawamura Daichi

likes to cage you under him and just lose it. will loop an arm around your waist and lift you up into him, so your back arches and he can hit the perfect angle.

will. not. let you look away. grabs your chin. pulls your hair. will move you however he needs to so he can look you in the eyes while he’s pounding into you.

“Shy now, princess?” Daichi said, tipping your chin to look at him. “Don’t hide. You look so pretty like this.” A sharp breath left your lips as he pressed his hips farther forward, grinding into you and sending a shock of pleasure through your body. “That’s it, sweetheart. Taking it so well. Let me give you what you deserve.”

Ennoshita Chikara

he’s a hair puller. like he doesn’t think much about it but he really likes pulling you by your hair back against his chest so he can whisper dirty shit in your ear. sometimes he gets a little too aggressive with it, so if you’re into that kind of thing, he’s your man.

possessive as all hell. you’re going out for drinks with coworkers? he’s leaving a hickie right at the collar of your top so everyone can see that you’re taken. coming out to dinner with his old teammates? he’s going to have an arm on you all night. loves to pull you in and remind you of things you did the night before to get you flustered.

very particular about how you’re positioned. will pin your arms above your head and readjust his grip several times. pushes your legs out of the way. grabs your jaw and moves your face where he wants you. somehow he doesn’t realize how hot that is until you tell him to his face. he’s still confused about it but has learned to love that you love it.

Chikara ran a hand up your side and let it rest in your hair for a moment before tugging hard. You gasped as he pulled it back and to the side, exposing your neck so he could leave marks as he pushed deeper inside you. You let out a whimper and tried to loop an arm around his neck but he grabbed your wrist and pinned it down.

“Patience, love. I want everyone to be able to tell I fucked you senseless.”

Yamaguchi Tadashi

he tries to dirty talk, but it always turns into praise and repeating how much he loves you.

aggressive and whiny, begging for more even though he’s the one giving it to you.

prefers when you ride him, but will do anything you ask of him. loves being told what to do. thinks you directing him to go faster or slower or a little to the left is the sexiest thing on the planet. he will fuck the life out of you if you just ask nicely.

“Harder, Tadashi,” you gasped. He grunted and snapped his hips as fast and as hard as it seems his body would let him.

“God, you’re gonna make me come. How do you feel so fucking good?” You smiled at the praise and pulled him in for a kiss. His breath hissed against your face as he continued pushing into you. You wrapped your legs tight around him and he let out a whine, pressing his face against yours. “I’m so fucking glad you’re mine.”

Oikawa Tooru

he’s a biter

likes to be lazy and dirty talks while you ride him usually, but every so often he shifts and will fuck you until tears are running out of your eyes.

will lay on top of you while you’re on your stomach, an arm looped around your neck, and just fuck you into the bedsheets. he’s wrapped up in his own little world, choking on high pitched moans and gasping for breath. like i said, he’s a biter, so you end up with marks all over your neck and shoulders. he’s just a fucking baby. the sounds he makes are so whiny and breathy it sounds like he’s the one getting destroyed instead of you.

“Ngh, fuck,” Tooru gasped. His breath was hot in your ear as you panted into the mattress. “Feel so good around me. You’re just begging for my cum, aren’t you?” You wanted to laugh and tell him you weren’t the one begging, but you couldn’t. Your breath was being torn from your lungs with every thrust. Tooru sunk his teeth into your shoulder as he pounded into you harder, letting out a soft whimper against your skin. His voice raised in pitch until he was practically whining. “Hah—gonna come soon. You feel so good.” His voice trailed off as it reached a whimper and he buried his face back against your neck, body shaking in anticipation.

Kuroo Tetsuro

spanking spanking spanking

seriously, hits it from the back and is not nice about it.

kuroo likes pulling you closer by your hips or ankles, turning you over whenever he feels like it, whatever. he just likes being able to toss you around and position you so he hits you just right every time.

“What? Trying to get away? That’s not how you take it, is it?” Kuroo grabbed your hips and yanked you flush against him. You cried out and buried your face against the bed. “There we go.” He laid a slap on your ass and laughed at the small sound you let out. “I’m not done with you yet. You’re not going anywhere.”

Bokuto Koutarou

he fucks himself dumb. accidentally goes so hard he’s whining and can barely hear you if you ask him to speed up or slow down.

likes missionary because he likes being as close to you as humanly possible and it gives him the best leverage to just.....lose it. gasping against your face and babbling about how good you feel. going off of that, he has a very hard time pulling out. lord have mercy. use a condom or get on a reliable birth control because as much as he tries, he’s never going to have any self-control in the moment.

he forgets just how strong he is sometimes, which results in bruises and weak limbs and occasionally trouble walking. he always apologizes profusely and offers many kisses to make up for it even after you insist that you’re fine.

“Baby, please let me come inside you. Please. Oh my god,” Koutarou whined, tightening his grip on your thigh and snapping his hips harder.

“Yes, Kou. Please.” You brought him down into a kiss. You were both panting and Koutarou was moaning, practically vibrating against you as he got closer. He began moving erratically, pounding harder into you and making you cry out.

“M’sorry. Fuck. I’m gonna come.” His chest heaved as he thrust into you hard once, twice, and let out a long groan. You could feel him twitching inside you, hands clutching your skin so hard it was almost painful. He mumbled praise and curses and nonsense against your lips, slowing his movement until he collapsed on top of you. He pressed a sloppy kiss to your forehead and tucked his face into your neck. “Thank you. I love you. Oh my god.”

Futakuchi Kenji

likes holding your legs and moving them around to see what gets the biggest reaction from you. doesn’t care what position you’re in but loves when your legs are closed and lifted so you’re extra tight around him.

his goal is to see you as desperate as possible. he’ll do whatever it takes to get your eyes rolling back, your hands clutching at anything they can grab, mindless pleading, all of it. he just wants to watch you fall apart because of him, and i gotta say, he’s good at getting his way.

“Oh, that’s it. Look at you,” Kenji cooed. He gently wiped a tear from your face as he readjusted your legs with his other hand, holding them tightly to his chest. “Coming apart already. I’m just getting started. Are you going to be good for me?”

Daishou Suguru

finger sucking finger sucking finger sucking. loves watching you gag so he’ll shove two fingers deep into your mouth and strokes them over your tongue. he also just does it to shut you up whenever he feels like it.

likes edging and teasing a little too much. will hold off from fucking you until you’re genuinely angry at him, so wet that he can push in with no resistance. then he makes it up to you by fucking you until you’re sobbing or your eyes are rolling back in your head. you’ve never had an orgasm with him that didn’t feel like you might not live to see the end of it.

“You like that, don’t you?” Suguru said, thumbing over your bottom lip as his cock slid between your legs, not pushing in like you desperately wanted him to. “Like when I use you like this? Should I just come like this? I don’t even have to fuck you to get myself off.” You let out a pathetic noise in protest and he laughed. “Maybe another time. Today I’ll be nice and give you my cock.” He dragged between your legs again and stopped at your entrance, slowly sinking in and pulling a relieved sigh from your throat. “There we go. That’s my fuckin’ girl.” He slid two long fingers between your lips, pressing on the back of your tongue and nearly making you gag. “Now stay quiet while I use you.”

Terushima Yuuji

i.......i gotta mention the tongue piercing. i’m sorry. i know he gives the most enthusiastic, sloppiest head and FOR SURE owns a vibrating tongue ring. what a whore. i love him.

i feel like he’s messy. like he’s into spitting and really sloppy kissing and cum play and everything. will come in your mouth and tell you to hold it there while he fucks you stupid. sometimes kisses it out of your mouth. he’s a freak and i like it.

“Yuuji, fuck.” You could practically hear your body vibrating, past orgasms still lingering under your skin.

“Yeah? Tell me where you want me to come,” he said. You groaned as he abused the perfect angle inside of you and smirked down at your strained expression. “Not gonna talk to me?” You stayed silent as your head tipped back against your pillow. He chuckled and grabbed your face. “Open.” You blinked up at him and did as you were told, sticking out your tongue. He leaned forward and spat into your mouth. “I’m gonna come inside of you. Yeah? That what you want?” You nodded and swallowed, eyes pinched shut and voice frozen in your throat. He laughed and snapped his hips harder. “That’s right. Anything for you, princess.”

Ushijima Wakatoshi

so we’ve all agreed: horse cock ushijima, however, he usually uses those powers for good. very gentle, very eager to please, exactly what you’d want in a man.

he’s not a hard dom, but sometimes he gets so overwhelmed with how much he loves you that he forgets how strong he is. pounding into you with his whole heart and whispering in your ear how much he adores you between groans. very vocal. a little too rough. definitely feels very guilty when you’re sore the next day but if you kiss him and tell him you liked it....he may be willing to throw caution to the wind again sometime.

Wakatoshi didn’t speak much, but the room was far from silent. He made the prettiest sounds when he was lost in you, grunts turning to long moans, made even sweeter when they were hummed against your lips. The groan of the bed mixed with the strike of skin against skin, white noise behind your already muddled thoughts. Wakatoshi pushed your legs farther toward your chest and leaned down, laying his face right against your ear.

“You’re so beautiful.” His voice seemed to rumble through your entire body. “You’re so good to me, darling. I love you.”

Kita Shinsuke

very soft. y’all are never gonna catch me writing hard dom kita shinsuke. HOWEVER. he is so eager that sometimes it’s a little too much for either of you. like he doesn’t realize how aggressive he’s been until you’re both literally unable to catch your breath and have to just lay in silence for a while. will ask you very nicely if you’re okay and get you water and anything else you need, but he will have this little grin on his face the whole time because he’s so happy to be able to put you both in that state.

Kita’s face scrunched up into a tight wince as he came, as his hips slowing into hard, deep thrusts that made your vision go white. Your grip in his hair was so tight you were sure it hurt, but you couldn’t help it when he was scrambling your brain with every touch. He stopped moving and you realized just how hard both of you were breathing. It felt like you couldn’t fill your lungs, body so spent that it couldn’t even do what it needed to do to survive. His braced arms on either side of your head were shaking, and his eyes were still shut tight.

“Shin,” you said, as steadily as you could through your gasping breaths. He didn’t answer. “Shin, baby, you okay?”

He exhaled hard and smiled, then let himself fall on top of you.

“Perfect. I’m—you’re perfect. I love you.” You laughed and combed your fingers through his hair, then pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“I love you too.”

Meian Shūgo

what to say about this man......

i feel like my opinions about what he likes and doesn’t like are kind of hot takes, because most of the stuff i see with him is hard dom. but. i raise you: overly excited switch meian shūgo.

captain meian shūgo likes to be teased and edged within an inch of his sanity. he likes when you talk shit and order him around and he’s DEFINITELY into handcuffs. however, he always pays you back for it. even if he’s still cuffed up and a little pink in the face from embarrassment, he will absolutely use you. very loud. loves when you leave scratch marks. loves leaving hickies everywhere.

You were almost shocked by the high moan that left Shūgo’s throat as he finally sunk into you. His face screwed up in pleasure and concentration as he withdrew his hips and drove them back against you.

“Fuck, I’ve been waiting for this. You tease me all that time but you can’t wait for me to fuck you like this, can you?”

“That’s some tough talk for someone whose wrists are still bound,” you said through a smile. He let out a breathy laugh and braced his hands on your stomach, still connected by leather and a short chain.

“Doesn’t keep me away from you.” He raised an eyebrow and pushed deeper inside you. “I can still use your body when I’m all tied up.”

Hirugami Fukurō

pulling a headcanon from his brother’s list and saying he likes getting his hair pulled, which means he loooooves going down on you.

will leave your legs feeling like jelly because he makes you come at least three times, and each one is hard. like, you forget where you are and can’t breathe for a few minutes afterward.

will cock warm you until you’re begging him to please, please move. proceeds to fuck you slowly, but so hard and so deep you’re feeling him between your legs the entire next day.

“Done already? That’s no fun,” Fukuro teased. You were still shaking from the last time he had pushed you over and he wasn’t helping the situation, thumb still circling your clit after already abusing it with his tongue.

“Come on. You know how to take me.” He continued easing his cock into you, dragging out all of the breath remaining in your body.

“Please,” you whispered. He smiled and leaned closer.

“Please what, love? Do you want me to stop? Use your words.”

“No.”

“Then tell me what you want.”

“Want you to—“ You gasped. “—fuck me. Please.” Fukuro grinned and positioned himself so he had more leverage over you.

“Good girl.”

[rezzyromance]

Idk if this is how you request things or if it's just asking, BUT-

How would the Lords react to an S/O that's usually the chillest person that you will ever meet (not to be confused with a pushover because they are not), they've never seen them even mildly annoyed when something bad happens. But then something happens and, turns out, the S/O is utterly TERRIFYING when they're mad.

Hope this makes sense!

Aw man I'm gonna feel awful scaring Moreau and Donna :(

Alcina

You're relaxing on a beautiful morning. The sun is shining through the window just enough to warm the room but not hurt your eyes. You hadn't even changed out of your sleep wear. "How are you feeling, my dear?", a sweet voice rang from the doorway. You were sitting in your favorite chair near the window. You turn and smile at her. She walks over and rubs your face in her large hand before leaning down and giving you a soft kiss. "I'm feeling amazing. And you?", you grab her hand before she pulls it away and you place a kiss on her knuckles. "I'm feeling alright. There's a new maid here. She's a bit slow. I'm giving her until tonight to finish dusting the entire castle or else she won't see another sunrise." It was almost comedic how dark her words were as you both stared out the window and gazed at the beautiful scenery. "Come on Alcina.", you stand up and place your hands on hers, trying to hold them despite the size difference. "Give the girl a break. It's a huge castle AND it's her first day.", you knew your words would probably change nothing. Alcina was rather cruel, but you looked past it. You tried your best to make the nervous maids comfortable whenever they arrive.

"We'll see how she does." She gives you one more kiss before leaving the room. You sit back down in your chair, enjoying the warmth of the sun for a little while longer. You lose track of time, minutes maybe even hours go by. Suddenly, there's a crash not far from the door. You jump and stand up, no longer comfortable after being startled. "What in the name of Mother Miranda?!", you leave the room and look down the hallway. The new maid stood there with a terrified look on her face. In front of her was one of the paintings Alcina had on her walls, now with a broken frame and a hole punctured. Your blood began to boil. It was a painting of you, her, and the girls all together. It was your favorite. "How in the hell did you manage to do that?!", you begin to stomp towards her. She cowers and struggles to find her words. "I-I-I was just dusting! It fell and I-I didn't mean t-", you cut her off. "How the fuck did you knock such a large painting over just by dusting?! DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ALLOWED TO MAKE SUCH STUPID MISTAKES HERE?!", you unravel. "I-I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!", she almost begins to weep. "SORRY ISN'T GONNA SAVE YOUR ASS!"

"MISS DIMITRESCU PLEASE HELP!", she cries out. You freeze, realizing that the lady herself is right behind you. You turn to face her. Her eyes are wide with shock. She has never seen you like this before and never even knew you had this type of side to you. She was impressed as much as she was terrified. "(Y/N)? Are you alright my love?" She had no idea what to do as your seething slowed down. "Why don't you go back to the room, yes? Settle down a little and deal with her later.", she places a hand on your back helps walk with you back to the room. Once you're there, she bends down to whisper in your ear. "I don't know where this side of you has been this whole time, but I am so amazed by you. And also a little frightened."

Donna

The Beneviento house was usually a calm place despite its creepy aura. You and Donna are both quiet and chill people. Never once have you fought or even raised your voices at each other. It was pleasant.

You had planned a nice dinner for the both of you. You wanted to try out a new recipe and surprise her, so you made your way to the kitchen to get started. "Okay, what first? I guess I'll need a pot.", you go rummaging through the kitchen and you find the pots stacked within each other inside one of the top cabinets. You groan and stand up on your toes, grazing the pots with your fingers. It didn't take much to cause them to tumble down, crashing on top of you with a loud sound that followed. "Aw shit.", you sighed and picked up the knocked over pots. A small but annoying pain began to throb in your head from where it made contact with a pot. What you didn't notice was you forgot to pick one of the pots up. It remained unnoticed. "It's fine.", you say to yourself as you maintain your composure. Next, a cutting board and knife. You turn around and begin to walk forward to find the cutting board, but you slam your toe into counter. You wince in pain and grab your foot. "SON OF A BITCH!", you yell.

You calm yourself, still wanting to have a pleasant meal with Donna. "Alright. Everything's fine." You step forward and kick the pot that you had forgotten to pick up. It caused your freshly kicked toe to ache even more. "OH COME ON! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!", you scream and swear as you throw your arms up in pure rage and shock.

"...(Y/N)?", a gentle voice whispered from the doorway, causing you to whip your head in that direction. It was Donna. She looked absolutely horrified and almost looked like she could cry. "Is.. is everything... are you alright?", she worried. "Yes. I'm sorry. Just got a little pissed off.", you took a deep breath to calm yourself down, feeling bad for scaring the poor girl.

Moreau

You were sitting on the dock together, looking into the water as your feet swung back and forth above it. It was a sunny day and you two decided to spend it outside. Your hand slowly made its way over to his. His feet stopped swinging for a second as you entangled your fingers. "I don't know what I'd do without you, (Y/N)." his words were bitter sweet as a gentle smile formed from his lips. "Oh, Sal. You don't have to think like that. I'll always be here for you.", you kiss his cheek and continue to relax as you sway your legs.

"There it is! There's the beast!", a voice yelled from not so far away. You both look in the direction of the voice and see a few young village boys. Possibly between the ages of 13 and 16. Moreau had become some what of a scary story for the villagers. A tale that kids spread on school court yard and bring up during dares. But, you've never seen a kid brave enough to actually make it far enough into the reservoir to actually see Moreau. Now, there were about 3. All of them stood and pointed, shocked and terrified.

"Hey beast! Come get me!", one kid teases. You glare at the kids as a newfound rage begins to boil inside you. "Let's go back inside.", Moreau says before standing up from the doc. The sadness in his voice was heartbreaking. Suddenly, one of the children gathers the guts to pick up a rock and throw it as hard as he could. His aim was off, but not by much. It slammed into the wood near Moreau's feet, startling him. "Take that you devil!", he laughs. "THAT'S IT YOU LITTLE SHIT!", you begin sprinting in the direction of the immature brats. Two of them run from the direction they came from while the one who threw the rock was frozen in fear. You took the opportunity to grab him by the collar of his shirt. "Listen here you little waste of space. I'm gonna give you 3 seconds to turn around and run for your goddamn life. If you or any of your little snot-nosed friends come around here again, they'll be goddamn fish food. Do you understand?" The kid was too scared to speak and instead began to nod rapidly. You let him go and watched as he ran as fast as he could, screaming the whole way.

You walk back to the shack and find Moreau standing in the same place he was when you took off. His mouth was agape and he looked almost as scared as the kids. "You alright Sal? I made sure those little shits won't be coming around here anymore." "Yeah... I didn't know you could be so... scary", he says. "I'm sorry. But those kids were being cruel. I had to do something.", you say. "Well... it was awesome!", he smiled. "But also very scary!" You laugh which helps sooth him a little.

Heisenberg

"Screw driver.", is all Karl said with an outstretched palm. He was working on some type of mechanical heart for his experiments. He wanted you to lend a "helping hand" even though he could easily do it all by himself. He did this because he wanted to be around you, he was just too stubborn with too big of an ego to simply say it. So here you were, handing him every little tool he asks for.

"Do you want the big one or the little one?", you say with a hint of boredom in your tone. "Aw c'mon don't sound like that! Isn't this exciting? It's like you're working on it with me! Also, hand me the big one.", you do as he says and hand him the big screw driver. "I just don't get it. You literally have powers. You can easily do this by yourself and have been for so long. Why do you need me to help?" He pauses for a second and looks over towards you, his brow slightly furrowed. "I don't NEED you to help. I just thought it would be nice for you to help out. Plus, you're the one always bitching about me constantly working. Well, here you are! Helping me work! So, either suck it up or you can leave." His harshness had no real ill will in it. He was just confused and a bit too ignorant to consider his words. But, he was testing your patience. He continued to use the screwdriver until handing it to you without saying a word.

"Hand me a screw.", he demanded with his hand facing palm up again. "Which size?" "They're all the same sizes, dumbass." You feel your blood begin to boil. "They're different fucking sizes! This one is smaller than this one!", you hold up two screws that are obviously different sizes. This makes Karl angry. Not because you were right, but because you seemed upset over something that seemed so insignificant.

"If you came here just to yap in my ear, then I don't think I need your assistance.", he huffed. You put the selection of tools and supplies he was making you hold on the table he is working on and ball your fists. "You're the one who told me to do this in the first place!", you yell. "Yeah, because you won't stop bitching! Non-stop you're always compla-" you cut him off before he can finish. "SHUT UP!", you yell. The room goes silent. "YOU SAY I'M BITCHING? HAVE YOU HEARD YOURSELF? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KARL YOU BITCH AND MOAN ALL THE TIME! I'M DONE TAKING SHIT FROM YOU!" He wanted to be angry, but he couldn't. He felt something much more overwhelming. Was he.. intimidated? He didn't move from his seat. All he could do was look up at you with a confused expression. What now? What is there to do? If he pushes you further, what would happen? He was actually too scared to find out.

You take a deep breath to calm down before speaking. "Now, if you want me to help with your shit, I'll stay as long as you keep your mouth shut. Can you possibly manage to do that?" He gulps nervously. "Yes ma'am."