#I think ill sleep now
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i had a thought. again. this may be one of my biggest yaps. +2 tiny arts included. Except it’s all horrible. It’s 2:30 am and I’m running on just straight brain power😭
wtf was charlie doing walking around during an extermination💀)
I had a daydream except it’s 2:30 am so night dream except im not really asleep but whatever. I imagined charlie found her and brought her back to the wherever and she just started YAPPING. Because she’s excited to have someone around, probably. She’s a lonely lil princess. I was thinking of a lot of different scenes this could happen in but I thought of this one the most. Charlie knows Vaggie is a “sinner” so she just casually mentions how she’s the princess, knowing (but not caring) about how most sinners disrespect her while even knowing her rank. So like she doesn’t care because she knows ‘this person won’t treat me better’. Or smth. Idk. Anyways. Keep in mind they’re not in the alley, but instead they’re… somewhere. Does charlie own the building of the hotel yet? Idk but we’ll just say yes for now because I don’t know where else they would be. Not Lucifer’s place, obviously.
but still, how/when did vaggie find out that the random girl who picked her up off the street was the literal PRINCESS OF HELL

P.s. charlie probably clipped vaggie’s hair out of her face for the sake of the bandage but i was too lazyz to draw it
CAN I JUST SAY??? CHARLIE WAS KIND OF ASS IN THE ALLEY SCENE. LIKE. WHY ARE YOU TUCKING YOUR HAIR BEHIND YOUR EAR. YOU CAN NOT BE DOWN BAD ALREADY LIKE I KNOW VAGGIE IS HOT AND SMEXY BUT GODDAM. LIKE YOU FIND THIS EYELESS WOUNDED GIRL IN THE STREETS AND ONE OF YOUR FIRST REACTIONS ARE LITERALLY WATTPAD LOOKING. (*tucks hair behind ear cutely snd looks away*) LIKE SHUT UPPPPPP.. I LOVE CHAGGIE BUT… THAT JUST IRKED ME. CHARLIE WOULD BE “OH NO I HAVE TO HELP THIS PERSON BECAUSE CLEARLY THEY GOT HURT FROM THE EXTERMINATION!! I HAVE TO GET HER PATCHED UP OR SHELTERED!!” NO!?? INSTEAD, SHE JUST TURNS FRUITY. OF COURSE SHE IS FRUITY.
i am.. so sorry for that. um. Anyways.
I like to imagine Charlie took Vaggie home, washed her up and they have a slow burn starting somewhere in there. Vaggie probably listened to all Charlie’s rants and dreams, while helping her slowly kick start the hotel’s physicality. They become better friends and begin to trust each other. because like, they’re all they got. Vaggie has no where else to go and charlie has no one else as loyal as Vaggie. So naturally they become dependent. Then romance ✨
. I know what i said about charlie tucking her hair behind her ear, but she was probably just noticing how pretty she was or sum. But still, you are in the middle of a warzone honey please stop being gay for a second 😭
but who had feelings first? Charlie, maybe because she already thought vaggie was pretty. But there’s also vaggie.. like of course she’s going to grow fond of someone who picked her up and started taking care of her when no one else would. Maybe they both started at the same time lol
No one really knows when they met Angel Dust but obviously before pilot right? I thought of a funny interaction that would kind of help the feelings be more known, if they weren’t established before they met Angel. Like there definitely are feelings in the air but they’re brought to attention by something snarky Angel Dust says when they first meet
THERE ARE SOOO MANY THINGS I COULD PUT FOR HIM TO SAY BUT I JUST CHOSE THIS CUS HE DOESNT HAVE A NOSE
Vaggie: CAN YOU SMELL MY FIST IN YOUR FACE??
then chaos. But like.. charlie and vaggie think about it. Then idk. That’s as far as my brain will take me. Hyperfixations help me yap a lot but it all stops at a certain point. There are so many ways chaggie could have been developed so it’s hard to just say one. So i kinda jjst want to see how it goes and how much they’ll show us of their backstory. I’m sorry for yapping.😭😭
#hazbin hotel#charlie morningstar#vaggie#hazbin hotel charlie#hazbin#chaggie#hazbin hotel vaggie#artists on tumblr#hazbin hotel angel dust#angel dust#anthony#hazbin hotel chaggie#hazbin hotel characters#hazbin charlie#hazbin vaggie#hazbin hotel fanart#vaggie hazbin hotel#charlie hazbin hotel#I think ill sleep now
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done w the overly depressing touya wip that's entirely me just projecting on him like crazy
#ill post it. tomorrow#dont question me being awake rn okay inhad like a top 3 level meltdown lmao#and now i finished writing fuckass mha fanfiction ok#whatever um ill re read it n change it as i gotta tomorrow#i think ill sleep now#sleepys postings
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[right to left]
finally finished This Wip from Ever ago and so now i ask you ever look into another dudes eyes and suddenly want to do whatever he wants
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#professor x#magneto#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#the kids are here too but i aint taggin them vaeLKEVJKLJ#snap sketches#posting this now and not obsessing over the details i need to SLEEP#please click/tap and zoom to read anything im sorry theres so much dialogue#i thought i was gonna finish this sooner but i went grocery shopping with my bro today and that took longer than expected !!!!#ALSO CHAT. if youre up to date on My Lore via my tags ... my prof's lettin me submit my assignment ... life's so good...#speaking of life being good i was giggling like stupid while drawing this . i named it 'this is stupid' and i stand by that#this is so unserious im gonna make myself throw up ITS SO CORNY i make myself sick with what i draw <- will continue to do this#only god knows if this is even how that power of his works i just saw an opportunity and ran with it#the trick here is he doesnt even have to use any 'power' he can just do that to charles by default#however im making them be obnoxious about it. i am making them obnoxious over dramatic grandpas because i can#my only crime is loving the utter cheese and corniness of the 60s comics like God. anyways bye !!!!!!!#maybe one day ill finish that other comic i sketched for this weekend but i fear i wont have time to so next weekend me thinks ....#for now i hope you all enjoy this. goofy as hell nonsense jLAKJVEKLVJ
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puppy
#ughhh (passes out immediately and sleeps forever)#prolly enough for now i think ill draw more actor au next time or smth else#own art#sketch#ivanluka#prodigy/rockstar AU#alnst ivan#alnst luka#alien stage
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whenever I actually see depictions of robot sex I get disappointed that its generally similar to human sex tbh like in my mind robot sex is completely incomprehensible as sex from a human perspective. but then I remember that most people who post about robot sex understand and enjoy sex from a human perspective and like actually like it for real and it isn't some complicated weird sex repulsed asexuality thing
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The Ishigamis and The Gifts of Science
Dr. Stone is a love letter to humanity and its sciences. The main character, Senku, often acts averse to all forms of affection, and the only love he doesn't deny is his love for science. But Senku is so so full of love. He just expresses it in a way other than physical touch or words of affirmation. He gives.
But let's go back to the one who taught him so– Byakuya Ishigami, his father. The love of Senku's life.

Byakuya is introduced in the tenth chapter of the manga as a dotting father who sells his car to present Senku with scientific instruments he will need for a more efficient research. This car is Byakuya's means of transportation, and given that he is crying and shaking in this scene, it could not have been easy for him to lose it. But his love for Senku is so big, that he wants to support his son's passion even if it means sacrificing a great convenience for him.
And Senku? Senku truly fell in love with science at this moment.

If there is anything that Senku is, he is Byakuya Ishigami's son through and through. They may seem like two very different people, as Byakuya is an openly affectionate guy while Senku is more closed off with showing his true emotions. But Senku takes more from Byakuya than not, and one of them is by showing his love and/or care for others through giving the gifts of science.
And it starts with Byakuya.
[Bodysuit Acquired!]

Byakuya had failed his first attempt at being an astronaut ten years back, but he doesn't give up and tries again. Senku then creates a bodysuit that manipulates muscle movement to help Byakuya pass his swimming test. And while the bodysuit doesn't quite help Byakuya to swim, the thought Senku had put into it had motivated Byakuya more than ever to pass the test. This is one of the fundamentals of gifting– sometimes, it really is the thought behind it that matters.
This motivation is what Byakuya credits during his interview with JAXA for passing the tests. He understands that Senku might not have given him any words of encouragement, but this bodysuit was all the words that were needed between them. Senku wants Byakuya to achieve his dreams just as badly. It's the way Senku shows his love for his father.
And it's the way Senku shows his love for others too.
[Glasses Acquired!]

One of the primitive aspects of the Ishigami village is that it considers bad eyesight as a type of "disease". Fuzzy disease, to be exact.
Suika wears a melon mask at all times to help clear her eyesight, which Senku later reveals is due to the pinhole effect. She, however, has never told Senku or the others about having the fuzzy disease. Senku himself notes how odd it is for her to wear a melon around, and confronts her about it once he decides to create glass. This is one of the most beautiful scenes in Dr. Stone, as Suika finds out that her disease was never a disease, and is finally able to see as clearly as the others. Senku basically gives her perfect eyesight, something she didn't even know was possible before.
[Antibiotics Acquired!]


One of the most beloved people in this village is the priestess, Ruri. Two of Senku's new friends, Kohaku and Chrome are deeply affected by her unknown fatal disease. Senku is such a person who would help a stranger even if there is no benefit to do so (though he would never admit to it), what more a person who his new friends truly love and care about. He cures Ruri of pneumonia, giving her a chance to live a life without the worry of it being her last day every day.
[Cola Acquired!]

Senku forms an alliance with Gen, who plays the role of Tsukasa's spy, for the promise of a bottle of cola. Both Senku and Gen are aware that the cola is only a front for Gen's loyalty to Senku and the Kingdom of Science, for Gen needs his superficial reputation as a comfort and cannot simply join them if there is no personal benefit for him to do so.
This cola is also the first gift post-petrification that Senku brands himself on, probably because it represents the first gift that is not out of necessity and leans toward a comfort/luxury that they both used to enjoy in the modern world.
For a modern man such as Gen, drinking his favourite soda in the stone world might have been one of the happiest days in his life.
[Cotton Candy Acquired!]

Senku cares about people so much, even if the people in question have tried to kill him. Senku sees Homura as a soldier who is merely following the orders given by her leader, but he also sees the Homura as a lonesome girl sitting by herself on trees day and night.
As usual, Senku hides his kindness and care by showing an evil ulterior motive, such as turning Homura to their side using the cotton candy, but Ruri points out that this is a facade. Similarly to Gen, a person with such an ego is unable to seem as if he is doing something good out of the kindness of his heart.
[Stove Acquired!]

As winter approaches, the elders in the village are worried about losing people to the cold. Senku hears about this and creates a stove which has a multi-purpose of cooking and also radiating heat for the people to stave off the coldness of winter. And speaking of winter...
[Christmas Acquired!]

Senku hangs up lights in the tree for the "light bulb test" on a random night. Except the date isn't random at all and he drops enough hints for Gen to catch on that it is the night of Christmas. The significance of the day is only appreciated by Gen and himself, as they are the only modern timers in the village. It is for the sake of nostalgia, but Senku would rather be caught dead than admit that he is a sentimental guy with such irrational feelings.
And well, it all comes back to that scene with Byakuya, doesn't it? If you recall, Byakuya calls himself "Santa" while giving the scientific presents to the young Senku. This indicates Senku received them during Christmas. Which means... Christmas is a sentimental day to Senku and his father. An anniversary of Senku receiving his Christmas presents from Byakuya, which led to his deeper dive into his science obsession. The beginning of it all, one would say.
And even though he's dead and buried, Byakuya never stops giving. He gives Senku the Ishigami village to provide Senku with allies. He gives Senku Lillian's music, because he believes in the light of music and understands the importance of media to society. He collects platinum till his last breath, because he believes that Senku will need it someday. Byakuya keeps on giving to Senku, because his love for his son is so huge and unconditional. And because he promised.

Surely, there is no greater love in the manga than Byakuya's love for his son and Senku's love for his father. Byakuya could easily win ten billion best father awards... well, not like there's much competition for that in shounen mangas.
#wrote this at 7am and went back to sleep immediately#and now that im wide awake again and rereading it it isnt that bad so erm ok hit post!#anyways i just rly rly rly love senkus and byakuyas relationship ok#the times ive cried for dr stone? ALWAYS FOR THEM#byakuya collecting platinum moment and dying...#i have lots of thoughts abt senku and byakuya and senkus love for his dad#the way the manga ended... it rly shows how senku is still always thinking abt his dad first and foremost#the love of a parent and how their children will always be just a little kid to them...#lots of ellipsis in these tags lmao#theres actually even more moments of senku giving stuff to others ofc#like giving tsukasa literal LIFE and the camera to minami yada yada#but yea i think these points r enough to show that senku rly invents things for ppl to show affection#like sure he enjoys creating science shit#but he also cares abt them and it's why he does it#i would say that gift giving is his love language or whatever#but ive heard that that love language stuff is bs so idk anymore#ask gen abt mentalism lore not me#wait no even if it was bs gen would not care and would have it in his psychology book#it's senku who would get triggered methinks#anyways lets just assume it's not bs and well#theres that thing where u make another person feel appreciated not based on ur own love language but based on THEIR love language#so like for example to make senku feel loved u should give him presents#and so far i think ive noticed three ppl doing this...? byakuya yuzuriha and gen#maybe theres more but i cant think of anyone else now#well might make another post in the future on this idk. or ill just reblog this one to continue#senku ishigami#byakuya ishigami#dr stone#dcst#long post
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Hello hello soo um im still workin on it ,ive been kinda burnt out from it an ik thers no real preshure and im wayyy past valintinse day but heres a wip of those silly lil valintines cards




Also today is my birth day im 22 now so .. Thats a thing. Anyway im planing on making like 3 alternet vershions of eclips 1 with the cannon tipical 2 arm pre decomishion desighn 1 with the 4 armed fannon /cannon design and 1 with the 4 armed ballone world desighn. Probly ganna take a bit but what ever it will be valintine in fuckin may who cares lol
#fnaf fanart#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#moondrop#fnaf eclipse#I shoulda went to bed sooner i acctuly have plans today ill be fine witj an houer of sleep hopefully i dont ruin my own party by being a#Insomneac#fuck im just waistin time i need to sleep but i could also stay up and just party rockers in the house to night my way threw#Im prett good at it but also my brain hit anouther developmental phase and o know ill probly sleep for 15 houers or more affter i finaly#Crash an i sapose to drink with my friend an have a lil party with them tonight#Fuck this is the most eventfull b day ive ever had hopefully i dont cry like i do every year idk why but i always cray on my birth day and#Cristmas#Lol why ru still reading this are you curious#Well hello there you silly fool im suprised anyone would make it down here like tbh i dont even think someone would even check the tags let#Alone read this far tbh im so confadent i think ill dox my self for fun#Are you redy im ganna do it#Get out a pen an paper okay#So here we go#I live in#Hahhahah bro why are u still fuckin here#I cant even spell oh shit fuck im a wizzerd now yah see that i turnd in to a spell casting wizzerd and youre just sitting there probly on#The toilet or a train or summin reading the tags on this nouthing burger of a post#Well any way its gettin late or early man idk its like 3:37 am and im tiyping this out#I gess were in the same bord borderline puthetic bote ?? Ship what ever fuck off i alredy said im a damb wizzerd in this hoe ?? That right#I said some fuckin who how whoe ? Like dude. Wtf anyyway fr fr i got milk thats been sitting on my night stand for maby an houer idk#I cant feel time anymore affter ... THE HORRORS#Anyway agin im acctuly ganna leave now have fun stay safe and uh thanks i gess for sticking arround have a lovely day and umm yah#So uh real quick why did u stay so long fr fr was it bc i was edging u with the whole doxing my self thing bc that was a joke tho i do get#The urge to so.e times .. Fuck im doin it agin
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There's one thing I'm surprised I haven't seen in the Danny Phantom Phandom...
I think we, as a fandom, can agree that the Anti-Ecto Acts are essentially saying it's illegal to be dead. The general wording used in most fanfiction is: "Ecto-entities or beings that produce ectoplasm must be captured for containment, experimentation, and elimination."
This is, of course, terrifying in and of itself. However, they based this "law" on the idea that ghosts are "post-human consciousness imprinted on ectoplasm..." ei. dead people.
This leads me to the topic of this post. They are basically waging war on the afterlife. Ignoring how foolish it is to fight an ever growing dimension like that, the GIW is basically attacking what could be Heaven. Granted, with the ghost fights, it would be Hell too, but the law doesn't differentiate.
You cannot tell me that there wouldn't be pure mortal chaos if people were told that going to heaven is illegal. That the government found proof of life after death and started to attack those on the other side and no human would be pissed because of the successfully piss off the afterlife there'll be no more heaven for anyone.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not particularly religious. I haven't touched a Bible. But, I do live in the US, and I think that if it got out that war crimes were being committed against the eternal resting place or whatever? People would riot. The Justice League wouldn't be necessary, just Lois Lane and other daring reporters telling the public. The GIW would get shut down so fast their heads would spin.
That being said, the show is pretty secular and I don't know if any of the major religions pop up in DC Comics, so maybe that's why I haven't seen it be used in fanfiction.
If you made it this far, thank you. I needed to get this off my chest.
#danny phantom#anti ecto acts#guys in white#danny fenton#sam manson#is literally jewish if I remember correctly and don't jewish folk have heaven or equivalent too?#or literally point out how the government is making death illegal#like... wtf!?#I imagine so many terminally ill people or particularly old folks would take exception to that#I am also so far past tired#I'm a little scared that this was not written as well as I think#I'm going to sleep now#good night#sweet dreams
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✧・゚: *✧・゚:* Across The Stars ✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
Sort of a late anniversary illustration for my husband, Captain Rex!! I'm sorry it took so long, but I was finally struck with the inspiration and I think it turned out pretty nice!!
They mean the world to me, their story is so so dear to my heart and is always gonna be a part of me!
Taglist♡: @me-myself-and-my-fos @flowering-darkness @sunstar-of-the-north @changeling-selfship @cherry-bomb-ships @rosieaurora @tropgothships @little-miss-selfships @starlos-soulmate @limey-self-inserts @candyheartedchy @space-sweetheart @clancykisser
@squips-ship @berryshipbasket @soulnottainted @homevideorentals @severants @tex-treasures @iwishihadfangs @fictodreamer
#artfarts#self insert#self ship#star wars#star wars the clone wars#sw: tcw#captain rex tcw#captain rex#oc x canon#self insert x canon#💙 oh captain my captain 💙#WAHH IT FEELS SO GOOD TO DRAW THEM AGAIN 😭😭😭#i wasnt feeling good tonight so i decided to finish this up 🥺🥺#ill get back on comms tomorrow but for now i sleep i got work so early tomorrow ; u ;#at least i can think about rex...
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i waz gonna pozt something elze originally . however i cannot look at the drawing without wanting to gouge my eyez out so have thiz practice doodle inztead
#im thinking about the larz redezign and wanted to try my hand at a tiny doodle before fully committing to making thiz hiz official new look#i like it – i think the colorz mash a lot better now and i think he lookz more “dreamy” [i guezz ?]#he lookz a lot more like some guy u would see sleeping on a cloud . and i think thatz definitely an improvement#the paztel shadez look good on him . iz what im trying to say#i dunno . ill still think on thiz before making anything official#but even thiz doodle i did in 20 minutez iz better than the art i spent like 6 hourz on#so. whateverr#im not salty about thiz. or anything#dhmis#dhmis au#high voltage au#dhmis lamp#larry the lamp#dhmis hv larry#doodle#im actually gonna kill myzelf#i hate thiz shit so much
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throws these at you
#marvel cinematic universe#xmen movies#xmen#xmen apocalypse#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#do i tag it cherik. of course i do#cherik#snap sketches#i have once again failed to draw erik's plan outfit from dofp cjWALcjkalkc#TOMORROW. or friday. i want to draw it at some point ..#idk how i ended up here. think i just wanted to draw bald charles. and the wheelchair...#thats why i gave up when it came to coloring and shading vklejalkj just a quick thing !!!!! ill make something epic soon. maybe. <-lying#anyway i have to decide if when i draw that outfit it will be another cherik thing or just a solo. might do the latter lest i go mad#for now good night !!!!!!!!!!!!!! i have class in seven hours and i need to sleep !!!!!
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armada memes pt 1
#transformers#transformers armada#megatron#optimus prime#starscream#armada megatron#armada optimus prime#armada starscream#memes#k i spent like ten minutes on this now i sleep#ill think of some more but this is all the goofs i got for now
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I’ve started a new job and still gotta get used to the flow so for now have a peter dooble
#art#my art#peter parker#spider-man#sketch#sketches#marvel#cleaned it up a little bit just cuz it was on a page with some wonkier doodles#ive almost completely flip flopped my sleep schedule and have not yet fully adjusted#but i will get there eventually#but i needed a post for the month and i dont think ill have time next week so for now here ya go#spider-sense being vaguely halo-esque? its more likely than you think
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i'm feeling normal about him anyway thank you for providing the torture saga

o7 i am happy to have provided his continued misery. alas he may not be in A Situation for a little while because i think yesterday fucked him up a little and he needs some time
#aka i crashed HARD after doing all that art and i think ill need a day or two#before i post much else#hshdbdjdb dw im just exhausted#doodles#shitpost#epic the musical#odysseus#penelope#odypen#torture saga#yeah ik its 2am and im calling it yesterday#but i crashed at 9 and so i just woke up#and im going back to sleep now bye
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- - - - -- - -- - - - --- e r e i s w a king.
#the barking writee#tanguish#welsknight#youve heard of posting and running now get ready for posting and sleeping!#except i think i hear water running in the other room so ill probably go investigate that firsblt#*first#because otherwise itll drive me insane#ngl im a bit self conscious about this chapter#im not sure how good it is#realistically its probably fine but#[shrug] sometimes its just hard to tell
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against all odds (to wait for you is all i can do) – part six
alexia putellas x photojournalist!reader
warnings: explicit descriptions of violence, blood, and death
(a/n in the tags) [parts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve]
word count: 3.3k
You had to get out of there.
Tremors shook the ground as another shell made impact somewhere far to your right but it was close enough that the explosion left your ears ringing. You flattened your back further against the fallen wall behind you when you heard the unmistakeable sound of gunfire, the rubble that cut into your skin barely registered in your mind from the adrenaline that rushed through you. But the cacophony of noise amalgamated into something continuous, something malevolent and cruel; something that promised death in its wake.
Bullets embedded themselves in a column, a wall, a body–everywhere–and fine pieces of debris flew and pelted against the exposed skin of your cheeks and against your helmet. Your eyes watered from the fine powder of pulverised cement and the oppressive heat, while your lungs were smothered by smoke and a choking stench–something like freshly-laid asphalt mixed with the distinct, rancid smell of burnt human flesh, sulphuric and sharp.
Through lidded eyes you witnessed the depravity; the extent of humanity’s appetite for senseless destruction and anarchy. It was total chaos–no, it was worse than that: it was butchery and brutality at its finest; a type of hell on earth.
All around you were bodies upon bodies, men and women alike–children. Their faces, frozen and pallid, permanently bore imprints of terror and agony; their crooked fingers and still eyes fixated to the sky imploring in violent judgment–resentful and anguished in their silence–the unspoken question:
Why?
Why?
Why?
Everything overwhelmed you all at once: the sight and the smell made your stomach churn to no end. Even when you heaved the remnants of your stomach to the ground, the nausea remained, pulsing and gnawing.
Wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, you brought your camera to your eye and you willed the shaking in your bones to still.
You took a shot.
Another round of bullets splattered to a nearby wall and this time, you threw yourself front-first to the ground and you felt the rhythm of your heart reverberating against the mud. And a sinking feeling hit you. You’d bore witness to many conflicts, faced mortal peril, and was familiar to death like it was an old friend. Each time you were in such a situation, hopelessness never got the better of you–it was like you’d always known you were going to make it out each time.
This time it was different, you could feel it in your bones. You were going to die here and it wasn’t a matter of if, just when and how.
But you had a job. If you were going to die, you would die being the mouthpiece for the ones who’d already been silenced–from their premature deaths or from the hand of the power meant to protect them or both–to show the world what they’d suffered, what they’d sacrificed.
With that in mind, you steeled yourself. You loaded your camera with another ring of film, fingers stiff from the cold and marred by blood and mud, and you captured the scene.
Repeat.
There were people screaming, running, clamouring for survival. As you moved with them, you kept an eye out for other survivors who needed help to get out of there. You scanned the faces for the familiar ones of Jones and Gilda but they were nowhere to be seen. You’d lost track of them after the initial explosion and the chaos that followed so the only thing you could do now was to look for them as you went and hope for their safety.
Meter by meter, inch by inch, you moved slowly away from the direction of gunfire. You were farther ahead now but the gunners were still dangerously close, still close enough to be able to catch up to where you were if they continued their pursuit, so you remained crouched and cautious for any sound that could indicate danger.
When you came across the rubble of a fallen building–freshly destroyed by artillery from the smoke that came from it–you heard a whimper. It startled you; the softness of the sound barely pierced through the ringing in your ear but when you peered under a slab of concrete braced by a rugged beam, you caught sight of a scene that shattered what was left of your heart.
In the shadows, big eyes that you could not mistaken belonged to a child shone with terror, a little girl that looked no more than ten years of age, her mouth partly open in fear. You could discern another person next to the child but they weren’t moving at all and from the blood smeared on the girl’s cheek, you had a sinking feeling that the other person was dead.
Gunfire echoed somewhere behind you and you flinched at its closeness. How did they get so close so fast? You needed to get the both of you out of there. If you could save this child’s life then maybe, just maybe, your life was worth something after all.
You raised both of your hands up and spoke gently, hoping the little girl would be able to understand that you were there to help as you stooped to fit through the gap. The child hesitated and receded further back into the rubble so you tried again as you inched closer to where the other person laid unresponsive, patient despite the ever-closing sound of shots being fired.
You reached the other person–a woman–and when you placed two fingers against her pulsepoint and found no rhythm, you bit your quivering lip and looked at the child, chest heavy. And as if the little girl finally understood that you meant no harm, she inched towards you and placed her small hand in your open one. With a firm yet gentle grip on the girl, you guided the both of you out of the rubble.
Once outside, you carried the little girl behind a wall, heart breaking when you felt her shiver and at the fact that it took little effort carry to her for she weighed so little. And now with light and cover, you inspected the little girl.
To your relief, other than the trail of flaking blood that originated from the crown of her head and on her cheeks, the little girl looked like she didn’t sustain any other physical injuries. Satisfied for the time being you began to tend to her, gave her water and what little food you had on you, and then wiped away the blood.
After she finished, you detached the velcro of your bulletproof vest and unbuckled your helmet before you put them on the little girl. Then you hoisted the girl up on your back, leaving your camera dangling heavily on your chest.
You managed to sneak across the district without being noticed but you knew the danger was never far away. A little farther on, you began to recognise key landmarks that let you know you were close to the base you came from. So even when the muscles in your legs protested for you to rest, you pushed on.
Not a moment later though did loud shots fill the air and immediately, you fell to the ground, feeling fine rubble and shrapnels cut into the side you landed on as you manoeuvred your body so that the child wouldn’t get hurt. The little girl cried out and adrenaline coursed through your veins, instinct driving you to keep the child safe so you pushed the two of you against a nearby wall, your back to the open space while you shielded the child with your body, her head safely caged between your arms and chest.
You craned your head over your shoulders to figure out where the shots were fired but then a feeling of lightness passed through you followed by a growing thickness at the back of your throat. You coughed, the force of it made you keel forward, and as you looked down you saw fresh blood splattered on the face of the girl, her eyes wide with horror as she looked up at you.
Then you felt it, a burning sensation that enveloped the entirety of your right side which left you cold. When you looked to your side your shirt clung to your skin, soaked with blood.
No.
You sputtered again and you tried to breathe but the pain only intensified and instead of feeling relief, the act smothered you–it felt like you were drowning. Then everything began to blend together: the shapes lost their edges and some images doubled, but the light seemed to intensify on its own, swallowing all in its wake. Then you sagged forward and the ringing in you ears, too, blared unceasingly.
No.
You must…
The child…
Wait.
Alexia–
“–are you okay?”
You started as Derek’s voice brought you from your reverie, your mind someplace else that you’d already forgotten but the feeling that you were missing something important lingered behind in the back of your mind.
“Huh?”
“Honey, your brother’s been trying to get your attention for the past minute. Are you alright?” The familiar voice of your mom brought your focus to her. She sat at the head of the long table while Derek opposite you, and you found twin pairs of blue eyes looking at you with concern. Your mom stood, chair scraping against the tiled floor as she did and she made her way towards you. She put a palm over your forehead once she was close enough before she asked, “do you have a fever?”
“Mom, I’m fine. I’m just–” You began but suddenly, a wave of exhaustion came over you which left you cold. It was as if a sheet of ice was put over you and you felt the coldness cling to your bones, weighing you down as your body slowly began to freeze over. “I’m–I’m just tired. I think I’ll rest up now.”
When you moved to stand, staggering slightly due to the weakness in your knees, Derek snatched your hands and clung to them, and you looked at him in alarm, eyes wide.
“Please, don’t. Don’t.” He said through gritted teeth, the corners of his mouth drooped low in a pained grimace, blue eyes glazed over and brows furrowed in a silent plea.
His obsecration confused you and you were about to ask him why you shouldn’t rest if you felt tired when your mother placed a hand on your shoulder, her grip gentle yet firm. You turned to her and when you found her gaze, she wore the same expression as your brother.
“You’re brother’s right, honey. Just–please, just stay with us for a bit more.”
What was going on? Why weren’t they letting you go?
Another wave of fatigue doused over you but this time, pain erupted from your chest. So intense was it that it nearly made you keel over the table, nails digging into its hard surface as you tried to catch your breath but with each inhale the more it felt like you were running out of air.
“I’ll–I’ll join you in a bit. I just… I just need a nap.” You staggered to your feet, pulling your hands away from Derek’s grip with the remaining strength you had and brushed off your mom’s protest.
As you passed the full-body mirror just beside your bedroom door, you saw your reflection, haggard and pale, and with her were the familiar silhouettes of the people that haunted you… your mother and father. They stood there behind you–your mother to your right and your father to the left–but you only found an empty space where they stood when you whipped your head back to look for them.
So there you stood, rooted in front of the mirror as you soaked their images in but for some reason, your couldn’t quite discern their faces. They were blurred; it was as if someone had swiped their thumb over the freshly laid ink of their image and made their features indecipherable.
Longing prompted you to reach out a hand to try and trace the lost edges of their faces but instead of meeting the mirror’s smooth surface like you expected, your fingers sank into the mirror like it was made of water. Quickly, in fear that it would hurt you, you retracted your hand and you watched in awe as the mirror image went still again, back to the reflection of yourself and your parents.
Then out of curiosity you plunged your hand again into the mirror and instead of feeling pain, you felt… nothing. The sensations in your hand in the mirror stopped as if it had ceased to exist completely.
Would it soothe then the pain in your body if you stepped into it?
The thought tempted you and you stepped forward, ready to sink into this silver miracle, but something stopped you–a weight on your shoulder pulled you back from the mirror. You staggered backwards, caught off guard from the force of it, but when you looked back you found nobody however this time, when you returned your attention to the mirror, the reflection of your parents was gone.
Emotions bubbled in your throat, bitter grief and burning confusion a familiar taste on your tongue. Where did they go? Why did they leave you? And as these questions filtered through your mind, another wave of exhaustion doused over you, its weight was unbearable. You needed relief, and soon.
You were ready to step into the mirror–into oblivion–but it wasn’t there anymore. In fact, everywhere you looked there was nothing, just negative space as if the light had dissolved all existence but you. You looked down and you saw your reflection on the still water you were apparently standing on.
It was so still, so peaceful, and you feel so heavy. It would be easy to just sink into this blissful nothingness–this silence–after… that’s right, after having witnessed the revolting boil of humanity’s thirst for blood. Yes, that was it, the reason you were here: you were here to forget.
The longer you stared into the water, the more your will to remain standing frayed.
Not a moment later, you let yourself be plunged downwards into the cold water. Into nothingness.
You woke with a start, breathing sharply as you did, the sensation of falling still with you and the memory of the dream you just had lingered. It was about… what was it?
When you opened your eyes, you found golden light and you squinted at the stream of the early sun that found its way through the gap between the heavy curtains. Your cheek was warm against Alexia’s bare back and you relished the way her muscles shifted beneath her skin as she breathed, still deep asleep.
With her so close like this a sense of peace and calm washed over you, the kind that only Alexia’s presence could provide. You turned your head slightly and shifted closer to her, pressing a soft kiss on one of her shoulder blades before you nuzzled the nape of her neck where her scent was most prominent.
You sighed as you breathed her in.
“What are you up to back there?” Alexia’s voice, rough and heavy from slumber, met your ears and the question elicited a small laugh from you.
“Nothing. Just getting comfortable.”
Alexia hummed then she murmured, “come here.”
You moved as she began to turn and disappointment filled you from the separation but when she pulled you into her embrace after she settled on her back, the disappointment quickly faded away. And when she kissed you, soft and languid, everything melted away except for the tender warmth of Alexia’s lips.
You were content.
Suddenly, a gnawing feeling seeped into the edges of your mind and, little by little by little, apprehension filled you. There was something you’d forgotten, somewhere you needed to be.
You pulled away from Alexia’s lips. “What time is it?”
“Don’t go.”
Her answer jarred you. You lifted yourself up on your elbow and considered Alexia, confused as to why she would say such a thing. She knew you had to go. How could you not go? Where else could you possibly be? So you asked her as much.
“No, you don’t have to. Please.” Alexia placed a hand on your cheek, her eyes glassy. You sighed, turned your cheek away from her touch, and extricated yourself from her warm embrace. You stood at the foot of the bed and regarded Alexia again who was now sitting up, the sheets pooled around her waist, her chest bare, shoulders hunched forward as she looked at you. You only shook your head before you went into the en suite bathroom to get ready.
Once you got in the shower you, unsurprisingly, thought of Alexia and your confusion returned twofold. Why was she making this difficult? She knew you had to go. You already told her…
At that thought, you frowned as you tried to remember. When did you tell her? Why did you need to leave? The questions were beginning to make your head hurt so you left the shower, wrapped yourself in a towel and headed to the closet. In there, you found your stack of simple white clothes. You picked a white shirt and a matching pair of jeans and you made your way to the bedroom door.
As you passed by the bed, you saw Alexia just as you left her and from where you stood, you saw how small she looked. And those eyes… they shone with something you could only name as plea, the tears in them now in danger of falling.
Your chest ached and so did your head.
You shook your head and made your way to Alexia, pressed an apologetic kiss against her temples, then you moved to the door.
You opened it and an abyss greeted you, a world of no outlines, shape nor colour, just a brilliant white that called to you. Its pull was magnetic, like a tide that wanted to sweep you away, but there was something keeping you in place, an invisible tether and it was anchored to the woman sitting in your bed.
“Please, don’t go.”
You had one foot out of the door when Alexia spoke with such gentleness you couldn’t do anything but look over your shoulder. The sight of her crying made the pounding in your temples unbearable and the pain in your chest blazed anew, excruciating and cruel. The world blurred and warmth slipped down your cheeks.
Why were you crying? Why was this difficult? You had to leave, you were about to miss something important.
“Alexia, why?” You sobbed, clutching your chest. It hurt.
She was out of the bed now, right beside you, and she reached out and cupped your face with one hand, the other went to your hand on the door handle. Her touch that used to soothe you, that used to bring you peace and clam, sent pain to every nerve in your body. You gasped, your chest was in danger of bursting and your knees lost their strength. And then you remembered why you needed to leave: you needed this pain to disappear; you had to get better.
Finally, your knees buckled under your weight but Alexia was there to catch you, her body strong and firm, and oh, so warm.
“Alexia, please let me go,” you sobbed into her arms.
Everything hurt. But she held you, unyielding.
“Stay. Please, stay with me,” she whispered in your ear and the words were followed by another wave of pain. This time, you screamed in agony and clawed at Alexia’s shoulders to get yourself away but still, she didn’t budge.
“I got you. I got you. I got you,” she repeated as every nerve in your body screamed at you. Everything coalesced into a singular, never-ending noise but Alexia’s voice pierced through the veil like a silver lining, a life line that you held onto as you were washed away into an ocean of light.
#ap11#not proofread#mine#my writing#a/n: sometimes it just hits you: the magnitude of man's madness. where does it stop? when? who will pay? why?#cant think anymore right now but let me know what you think about the story so far#apologies for the mistakes i wrote this in sleep deprived mode ill fix them later#woso x reader#alexia putellas x reader
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