#literally there is no one else that could ever make him feel this way

[jayktoralldaylong]

One of my favourite things about Arcane is that all the couples can be read as toxic, which is GREAT.

I'm tired of people bringing morality debates into dark media. Let dark media be fucking dark. You guys wouldn't survive a day in the TMA fandom, needing everyone to be as good as gold. How are they going to make for enjoyable complex characters if they're not morally grey. In fact, I wish there'd been more expansion on just how morally black they can become!

"CaitVi is so toxic" According to lesbian statistics, that sounds just about accurate. 💀 Heck, I wish Caitlyn had done more (Not really, but it would have been nice to further explore the darkness in her heart). Isn't it adorable how she immediately folded as soon as Vi called her cupcake? Caitlyn's like one of those villains that will consistently do the most....until it comes to someone else hurting her girlfriend. The only one allowed to hurt her girlfriend is her. 💀

Then let's talk about Vi. Someone pointed out how Vi never cared about Zaun's independence in the first place and many people yelled that they were wrong. But actually, they were right. Vi never wanted Zaun. Zaun was Silco's dream, and Jinx inherited that dream cause Silco would never shut up about it. Vi wanted Piltover to take responsibility for all the shit they allowed to happen in the Undercity. That's a part of the reason she joined up with Caitlyn in the first place. Let's not forget she wasn't dissuaded when she dragged Jayce down to fight with her and he killed a child. Children been dying, it's been her whole life. Someone needed to do something about it, and Zaun would have just isolated the people from all the privileges that Piltover SHOULD have been providing for them. Some people just can't accept that Independence cannot in fact solve every problem, and sometimes independence is colonisers running away from the responsibility of fixing the mess that they started in the first place.

Besides, we all know Vi joined up with the Enforcers because "I feel like I am worthless if I can't be of service." She'd already run out of family members to serve, Caitlyn was the next best thing. She's just like Jayce.

And speaking of Jayce, let's talk about his violent levels of codependency with anyone who'll give him attention. People LOOOOVE to talk about Mel, but it's there with Viktor too. When bro wasn't basing his worth on his inventions, he was centering it around Viktor.

Viktor who decided at some point in his life that he would not LIVE without Jayce. He was fine dying without him, but living without him was unacceptable. Oh how healthy. 🙄😂 Viktor be the kind of toxic ex to threaten divorce 500 times over, then burn the world when you actually leave him. Jayce is no better cause he's the kind of guy to keep going back to his toxic Ex.

Yes, Mel is manipulative. That's what I love about her. How are you guys failing to give this woman the praise of being an outsider in Piltover, but running their entire council. 💀 Girl raises her hand once and the whole government starts spinning. She was the best sugar mummy Jayce and Viktor could ever ask for. She kept the whole city running. Literally the entire of Piltover dancing on her palm. And yes she manipulated Jayce but let's not forget she thought that was a love language. 💀 You wanna be mad at someone, be mad at Ambessa for raising her that way.

I also don't think it's fair to blame her for the Undercity situation, she's not native. Monkey see, monkey do, and not a single one of those Council members actually cared about the situation down there, it was deplorable. 💀 Jayce did way more in his two weeks as Councillor than any of those drug pushing, money laundering, Piltovian heads of government.

And that just covers MelJayVik, we don't even need to get fully into TimeBomb, cause we know what's wrong there. 💀 Surely we have not forgotten the many teammates Jinx has killed, but making sure to never kill Ekko cause that's her man. Ekko has a lot to unpack, like how his consistent and unwavering love for Jinx is an indication of a lot of doors he might not be ready to open. I know they dynamics go crazy and I love to see it.

Ambessa and Sevika are a crack ship but I'm sure we all know bedroom dynamics go crazy with Mrs. Warlord and Miss Liberation. I love it when characters clash in a toxic heap. It's insane and should be explored.

Quit saintifying my toxic ships with your woke morality debates. If you want everyone to be sunshine and rainbows then you should be watching literally anything else. 💀 "It's not healthy." GOOD, I like it that way. 💀 Angst, spice and trauma are the recipe for a plethora of explorative fanfiction. Any of their dynamics can be taken in any toxic direction and I want that EXPLORED.

[dokidokitsuna]

GameSwap!AU

Just a random idea I had: what if Magolor and Hyness traded games with each other? Like, their character/personality remains the same, only now they each have the other’s roles and goals. I thought it would be fun~

-So making Magolor the main antagonist of Star Allies would be a trip; I feel it would change the whole ambiance of the game…probably in a detrimental way, from a gamedev point of view. You don’t really wanna put the super cute and charming new character with the most memorable heel-turn in the series…at the center of the “nostalgia” game. ^^; With the return of the Helpers and a dozen familiar faces cameoing as Dream Friends, Magolor’s theatrics would be too much of a distraction.

But whatever, let’s say we put him in anyway: now Magolor is the leader of Jambastion, trying to resurrect a god of emptiness and despair. I predict he snaps immediately. XD

I just think handing that kind of leadership role to an obviously power-hungry character like Mago would grow worms in his brain incredibly quickly. ^^; That isn’t to say that he’d do the cuckoo-4-coco-puffs schtick that Hyness does– I think instead he would be a sort of annoying “chuunibyou” character; constantly popping up to ramble about being Void Termina’s chosen one, destined to succeed because he’s the specialest and bestest ever, so you might as well give up now.

And he’d give off this completely unserious vibe like, “...Are you just making this up? Is this god you’re trying to resurrect actually real; or are you just a very lonely, understimulated, disturbed little egg…?”

And then by the end of the game we realize that he *wasn’t* making it up, and as he starts abusing the Mage Sisters (who probably hate working for him to begin with...) and rapidly becomes a real threat, suddenly we’re forced to take him seriously. ^^; We’ll rescue him from Void Termina’s innards anyway, though, because we’re nice, and similarly to his true character arc; he’ll probably realize that he got in over his head and beg to be saved.

-Hyness in Return to Dreamland would be interesting…primarily because he doesn’t seem like the ‘manipulator’ type to me. I think he’d be more of an ‘absentminded professor’ type: enthusiastic and silly but in an awkward, understated way. He’d just come right out and tell us he wants help to find the Master Crown, but he’d present it as a mysterious object of limitless possibilities that we should ALSO be interested in…y’know, just for curiosity’s sake. Conveniently leaving out the fact that he’s taking it for himself, and he’s more than just curious– he already knows exactly what he wants to do with it. ^^;

And similarly to *his* true character arc…I think Hyness would go all in. ‘_’ No hesitation, no regrets; he’d dive right into Mistilteinn’s clutches and become its twisted avatar, forcing us to literally carve him out of there if we want to stop him. This would probably call for a much tougher boss fight, with a more serious ambiance– none of Magolor Soul’s cutesy juggling; let’s aim for something more like Zero’s eyeball exploding out of his face, but in 3D~. Or all the horrific stuff Fecto Elfilis had going on, since we have the benefit of hindsight. XD

As for the end…this may hurt some folks, but I think it would make sense for Hyness to die, like the devs originally planned for Magolor before they decided to have mercy on him. The thing is, without the Mage-Sisters to highlight Hyness’ changes in behavior, there’s not as much to gain from redeeming him…maybe that’ll be part of his character arc too; seeking to become the instrument of the Master Crown because he has nothing and no one else. This version of Hyness still has his empty heart, devoid of care, but without Void Termina to pledge himself to, the tree-demon is the best he can do. ^^; And with a little fleshing-out of his backstory before he goes (perhaps a chance to learn more about the magic vs. science users…?) he could make a good tragic antagonist, the first of his kind in the series.

-...Seeing as RtDL was supposed to be like a fresh start for the Kirby series, though, all this lore and sadness would be a little heavy for that concept…from a gamedev point of view, I would reject the idea. But if we did go with it, I shudder to think how it would influence the rest of the games to follow…perhaps the franchise would actually have taken the grimdark turn that people like to think it has. ^^ Which would be cool to see, admittedly.

[bibibbon]

Now it's not about one of my wips. So ...I stumble a post here talking how Dabi was this close to became a Nomu, how dabi knows what Nomu are (maybe he is not well versed but it's not out of pocket he would know what is a Nomu) and ...how he may know how afo doesn't give a shit about shig(the last one is just common sense) and it makes me think...

Dabi has so many reasons to hate shig. Shig who gives nomus uncaring and willy nilly and use them as a weapon ...could make dabi think of endy (oooh no one would ever think that, but think this way Toya is a toy/project Endy created and tossed aside...shig does the same with the nomus)

I love them as frenemies....but Dabi has legit reasons to not like Shig...and I dont even think, in shipping sense, a hate sex situation would cut out.

If dabi wasn't suicidal...I think he could steal shig's position, kick him to the curb and...maybe killing the remain nomus as a mercy killing ( the last one is just an idea. Dabi is a villain, but before hori made him "the lil devil" to justify Endy...I think it was possible for him...to do that)

So ...imagine an au where Dabi does that. Shiga lost everything, and Dabi wins bc he is smarter.

This is not motivated by any bashing feelings. I like shig but possum doesn't give a shit to nomus, Kuro or anything else...he is a npc ...so maybe if he had to struggle and pull himself on his feet, without any plot device ...maybe the character could grow.

Hi @mikeellee 👋

It is true that dabi was incredibly close to becoming a nomu, considering that AFO literally retrieved his dying body and put him in one of the controlled hospitals where they kept kids there to turn them into another shigaraki puppet or a nomu.

From what we get in chapter 350 from Dr garaki, I don't think Dabi fully knew the inner workings of how Nomu's are made but I do think that he knew that Nomu's were once humans that were experimented on. Personally, I believe that the first time Dabi heard about Nomu's was probably rumours from the street of people commenting on how the ruler of the underground has created living puppets.

Dr garaki admits that Dabi by the time he left the hospital knew more than he let on, he knew what the hospital was for, knew what the hospital meant what they were selling to him, what they wanted to make him become and he rejected that. I believe that a part of him rejected that because he wanted to go back, he wanted to prove that touya is indeed alive, he wanted to reach for his family's embrace, to apologise to his mother, to earn validation from his father yet all of that crumbles the minute he sees what enji is doing to shoto. Touya dies, and dabi is born living only through sheer hate and determination for revenge.

Ultimately, I believe that the moment dabi meets Dr. garaki a second time, he is now fully aware of the origins of the nomu and has completely understood and solved the hospital case. He realises that everything is connected and he hates it.

By extension, he would hate shigaraki or completely dislike him for his ignorance. After a while he would also figure out that shigaraki is just a pawn in the grand scheme of things and I think (due to dabi's already toxic beliefs like victim blaming) he would grow to hate shigaraki even more. However, I do imagine that other emotions would grow something akin to pity as he sees shigaraki trying to break out of the mould just to fully fall into AFO's trap. Maybe dabi grows to hold a tiny ounce of care, trying to indirectly deter shigaraki from doom, but again, that's neither here nor there.

Also, I agree heavily with you that if Dabi wasn't suicidal then he would probably rebel on a larger scale, taking over and becoming a new leader. However, dabi is a man full of hate. That's the only reason he is alive. He is a man out of time, a man who is slowly dying with one goal in mind : revenge.

[windcarvedlyre]

I've been following @druidposting's DR2 playthrough on discord and we just had a really good discussion about DR's Closing Arguments. Specifically the way the murderer is depicted as grey and featureless, which until now I found a bit annoying.

In Danganronpa it's repeatedly the case that we don't have the full picture until the talking actually stops- which always goes beyond the end of the trial. We generally vote first and come to understand what the murderer's actual motive was, sometimes filling in important pieces of the timeline in the process, afterwards.

But none of that matters for the killing game because characters' emotions aren't directly relevant to who was the 'blackened'- the only thing that matters to Monokuma- so it comes out afterwards and does nothing to change their execution. It doesn't matter how sympathetic they are (basically everyone) or whether other people share responsibility for the situation (eg. Hanamura, Pekoyama, Momota) or whether they intended to murder at all (Nanami). They objectively pulled the trigger and nothing else matters. Nothing about them as a person matters.

The Closing Argument mechanic might illustrate that problem- literally. They're a dramatic, conclusive summary of the entire case... constructed before the vote even happens, before we know if we're actually right, and they're missing something really important:

The actual perpetrator.

We quite literally don't even begin to see the real person behind the crime, any real exploration of their mental state, anything besides the cold, hard facts of the murder that are necessary to convict them, until the comic finishes and the protagonist makes their final accusation- replacing the grey figure with their real appearance in a shot that's often intensely emotional.

And these comics lack crucial parts of the case's timeline and sometimes important parts of the very scenes they depict that we only find out about afterwards. And those are what we know; characters may die with some pieces of the truth and prevent us from ever learning them. These aren't objective depictions of the murder, they're the protagonist's subjective attempt to connect the facts they have. A join-the-dots portrait of someone with missing dots and no colour.

Even characters' expressions may not match how they truly feel, with the grey placeholder potentially looking way more confident and sinister than they were in reality. Pasting Falter's commentary here since they put it well.

For obvious reasons this could especially be a problem for characters that die before the trial- the ones we never get a post-vote testimony from. DR1 chapter 4 really highlighted that in the way Asahina's huge misinterpretation of Oogami's feelings took up a lot of the post-trial discussion, only for Monokuma to reveal Oogami's real suicide note and recontextualise everything.

It might really be a problem for how Komaeda's depicted in DR2 chapter 5. While he isn't greyed out, we get panel after panel where he's either level-headed or maniacally evil, and even the depictions of his self-torture and death don't humanise him:

But we know that his real feelings were more complicated than that. We have his actual corpse to compare the last page to.

He died afraid.

If we approach the comic as Hinata's mental image of him instead of reality, he died without anyone truly understanding him. He was alarming, very hard to relate to, actively fought against people doing so, ensured even the killer didn't watch him die, and the survivors couldn't begin to understand his motive until a chapter later. The Closing Argument reflects that.

Early in DR1 Togami calls out the rest of his class for judging others by their own standards. However, he, too, is doing this, maybe more so than many other characters; his inability to view other people through anything but the cold, brutal logic of the killing game bites him in the ass in chapter 4. In DR2 chapter 2 voting without a good understanding of Pekoyama's motive or Kuzuryuu's involvement nearly got everyone killed. Komaeda's a walking embodiment of the problems with flattening people into caricatures and not empathising with them, suffered from people doing that back to him, and his case- the Closing Argument for which turned everyone else into grey placeholders- was impossible to solve with objective facts. It was only survivable because the survivors cooperated and one person tried to analyse things the way he would.

The games have always been a critique of the justice system and Japanese society and push us to care about others as individuals, not reduce them to- and judge their right to exist by- something they've done or their net impact on society. There are always consequences when someone neglects to do that, and the above might be yet another way the games explore that theme.

[sirhamburrger]

CHAPTER ONE: technical checks

basket case - h. chigiri x f!reader (band!au) || divider by @roseraris wc (written portion): 352 || tags/cw: stress-induced breakdown, denial of negative emotions, sentiments of being 'a burden' to others, just really really angsty (this hit me right in the feels, and i wrote it) introducing manshine! (please read this first) || introducing x-gen! || next chap

stumbling past security with chigiri, she holds her access pass high up for personnel to see. chris is still talking with reo, and she internally curses ego with all her might. she plasters an apologetic smile on her face, setting her things down backstage.

"great, we're all here now." chris' smile fades slightly; he knows he's going to have to deliver some unpleasant news. "data collected from your first ever show indicates promising results. turnout was on par with x-gen and the ubers. however, crowd satisfaction wasn't great." he stops then, looking each member in the eye. "what do you think we could do to change that?"

she knows it's only his job to be asking these questions, to help them do better, but she can't help but resent him for it. so she says what he wants to hear - what ego and anri want to hear.

"we can switch out some of the songs on the setlist for more appropriate ones," she says lamely. "ones that might appeal more to our western audience."

chris nods quickly. clearly he doesn't want to make this harder than it has to be. some of the earlier resentment fades.

after all, this is how it has to be.

reo stands a little closer to her, his elbow brushing against hers. it's like a reminder of their solidarity as a group. but solidarity never solved problems like the way her eyelids grow heavy after hours of staring at music notation and the continuous effort to stay on tempo. it never solved problems like the blisters on her hands after rehearsal finally concludes, or the persistent ache in her shoulders and arms and back and everywhere else.

and it certainly never solved the way she leans against the cold tiled wall of the hotel bathroom, sliding down until she's sitting on the floor. the floor upon which she hugs her knees close to her chest, and cries silently for half an hour.

she lies to reo afterwards about how she's doing. it's the least she can do, after all, to not burden them with her trivial feelings.

a/n: i just had to have oliver's character be meaningful in this series >:) how could i not? bastard munchen's band name in this au is actually b-stards but manshine and everyone else literally doesn't give a single crap LMAO

taglist: @narcjsistx, @nyxlai, @n0ah-hal00 (open, comment on any post in the series to be added)

bllk masterlist || general masterlist

© sirhamburrger 2024

[the-tmnt-ficfinder]

Christmas kindness letter

To Remedyturtles AKA Remrose,

I’ve read a good chunk of your fics. Probably just about all of them. And what constantly amazes me is your way to just… draw me INTO the story and leave me literally unable to put it down. What’s especially funny about that is how you write a lot of Leo-centric things, and my favourite turtle is Donnie. Leo is my second favourite, though. But I didn’t think I’d ever be so captivated by the stories you tell about him, especially with how heavy with the angst they get.

The first longer fic of yours I read was Stare Directly at the Sun. Which I read in pretty much one sitting. I don’t even know why I clicked on it— considering, as I said, Donnie is my favorite, and I actually do not care for human AUs. Somehow, this one drew me in and locked me there. I loved it. 

And Firefight? That took over my LIFE. I powered through it, literally spent HOURS just sitting on the couch reading it (and even reading it outside on a nice day). I joined while it was incomplete, and read what was there in only a few days. Then, I read every subsequent chapter as soon as I could. It was a legit highlight of my day, something I looked forward to, and I was hooked so bad like you wouldn’t believe. It was sad to see it end, but what a beautiful journey it WAS. I love love loved it, especially how long you took to focus on the healing of Leo and Donnie… they went through hell, indeed, and managed to come out the other side stronger. Even Leo, who scared the SHIT out of me for so long. But I’ll cut myself off, here. I could go on FOREVER about Firefight, you have no idea. I’ve been meaning to read this one again, actually. I need to.

The last fic I want to highlight, of yours, is actually one I don’t see talked about much: Take One For the Team. That one. That one. It was haunting. It was sickening./pos It was gripping. I could. not. put. it down. It was horrific to watch Leo go through that, to watch him deteriorate, and even though you didn’t detail his… extracurricular, I felt violated along with him, simply because of how he reacted to it, and how you wrote him processing (or failing to process) it. Slash pos. Seriously. This one. THIS ONE. I guess it isn’t talked about much because it’s a very sensitive topic, but if people can read it, they should. Holy shit, incredible.

I’m not sure what makes your writing so captivating. Maybe it’s how you write the characters. Maybe it’s your style. Maybe it’s both. Maybe it’s something else. I don’t know. But it’s easy to get lost in, and so easy to get attached, to CARE, and to feel along with these characters. Reading your stories is like sitting in the passenger’s seat of a friend’s car on a long road trip. You experience everything together, and, to me, it feels pretty damn special. 

Anyways. I’ve prattled on enough. If you’ve got more gems planned, I’ll be happy to read them (in the meanwhile, I have on my list to read Little Kid With a Big Death Wish because I HAVE NOT READ THAT YET I have TOO MANY FICS TO READ/lh it’s on the list tho).

Have a very Merry Christmas!! :D

@remedyturtles

Christmas Kindness Event Post

[imagrindylow]

Secret Santa

Percy Weasley / Marcus Flint 2.5k Words Content Warnings: None, it's just fluff. Summary: Oliver signs up Marcus for the Hogwarts gift exchange as a prank, but things end up going better than expected for Marcus and his secret Santa. A/N: 🎅🎄 Merry Christmas! 🎅🎄

~~~~~

“Did you sign up for the gift exchange?” Percy asked Oliver, raising a brow and glancing up over his transfiguration textbook at the other boy as he took a seat across from him at their usual table in the library.

Did Percy honestly think that Oliver would be one to sign up for some silly gift exchange ? He had more important things to think about, like Quidditch, revising, and just… literally anything else…

Oliver shook his head, letting out a huff that would answer the question before his words ever did. “Absolutely not. Can’t be arsed to go Christmas shopping for some random sod,” he said, pulling out class notes from his bag that needed another once over before an upcoming quiz.

Percy’s lips pulled into a thoughtful line and he eyed the boy across from him, almost disbelieving. “I could have sworn I saw you dropping a slip into the box in the Great Hall. Perhaps I was mistaken?”

“Oh, that you did. Wasn’t my name, though,” Oliver admitted, stifling a snicker with his hand. He didn’t care to elaborate just yet, giving Percy room for the lecture he knew was imminent. 

Percy groaned at Oliver’s admission, his forehead hitting his palm as his elbow moved to rest on the table. “You wrote someone else's name down? You know that isn’t allowed,” he said with a sigh. “Now, what if this person – who might not have planned on participating – doesn’t follow through with getting a gift for who they’re assigned? You’re going to ruin someone’s Christmas.” 

“Oh Merlin . As though the professors would let anyone go without a gift after having signed up. It’ll work out just fine, just you watch,” Oliver assured him, appearing unbothered and still quite smug about what he’d done, while also being thoroughly amused with Percy’s dramatic take on what was little more than a silly little prank.

“Who’s name did you even put down?” Percy wondered, staring across the table at Oliver, not even trying to hide the judgment on his face. 

“Flint’s,” Oliver said, a boyish giggle escaping his lips, one that made him glance over his shoulder to make sure he hadn’t caught the attention of the librarian.

Percy gaped at Oliver, staring at him disapprovingly over the rim of his glasses as they slipped down the bridge of his nose. “Did you really need to add fuel to the fire?” He asked, adjusting his glasses back into place before closing his textbook. “Why would you do that?”

“He’ll never know it’s me, for one, and for two, it’s all just strategy,” Oliver said, tapping a finger to his temple and smirking at Percy, before continuing on explaining his thoroughly devised plan. 

“Picture it, he’ll get a letter with the name of the person he's assigned to get a gift for, and he’ll be so confused – because let's face it – there was no way he was going to sign up to participate. Maybe he’ll stress about it, try to tell Snape there was a mistake or something, that he didn’t actually sign up, but by then it’ll be too late. He’ll be on the hook because he won’t want to look like more of an arsehole than he already does. He’ll be distracted, and the less he’s thinking about quidditch, the better it is for me. For Gryffindor.”

Percy had to admit, Oliver was great at planning, and as it were, scheming. Percy’s eyes narrowed the slightest bit as he tried to hide the grin threatening to split his face, but he cleared his throat and regained his composure. “That isn’t funny, Oliver.”

“Whatever you say, Perce. I just feel sorry for the poor soul who has to buy something for him,” Oliver said, quite pleased with himself for managing to make Percy crack a bit with his antics.

~~~

“This is all your fault!” Percy said harshly, sliding onto the bench beside Oliver in the Great Hall for lunch one afternoon, a week before Christmas holiday. There was a slip of parchment clutched in his hand, which he slammed on the table in front of Oliver, making the other boy’s teacup clink against its saucer.

“What are you on about?” Oliver asked, looking to Percy then to the paper he’d been so aggressively presented with. Oliver nearly choked on his bread when he saw Flint’s name scrawled on the parchment in his very own handwriting, along with the very short and made-up list of gift ideas for the Slytherin that he’d come up with. “Oh… Well, that is… Hmm. I didn’t think you’d–”

“No, you didn’t think, did you? Now I have to get him a gift. I’m making you shop with me, you bloody nitwit,” Percy spat, his face flushed both from annoyance and some other feeling that he couldn’t quite place. 

“I didn’t know you’d even signed up,” Oliver said, as though this would help. He watched as Percy stabbed at a piece of meat on the serving platter and brought it to his plate and he couldn’t help but wonder if Percy had been picturing stabbing something else just then. “I’ll shop with you.”

“Of course I signed up, I’m Head Boy . I wanted to set a good example for the prefects – to get participation up across all of the houses,” he scolded, then dug into his lunch, keeping his eyes on his plate for fear that his eyes would reveal a bit too much of what he was thinking – that he wasn’t actually upset with who he’d gotten assigned to.

“I just can’t believe out of everyone, you got assigned to him,” Oliver muttered. “I wonder who he got.”

Percy wondered too.

~~~

Percy hadn’t paid much mind to Marcus before this week… Sure, he was familiar enough with the Slytherin, he’d often hear Oliver ranting about the other boy, especially post quidditch matches. And yes, Percy had seen him fly and had thought about that a good deal. But appreciating one’s form while flying was hardly the same as sitting and wondering about one’s inner workings, likes, and dislikes. 

But because of his dorm mate, now Percy was forced to think about the other boy much more than he’d wanted to. How do you pick a Christmas gift for someone who’s family is so wealthy and could already buy him whatever he wanted, especially when there wasn’t a relationship there to draw personal or sentimental ideas from? Hell, there wasn’t a friendship there at all , which was making this whole thing feel awkward and weird . 

But perhaps the most awkward and weird thing was currently happening inside of Percy’s own head. He truly wanted to get the other boy a gift he’d enjoy, he wanted to see Marcus smile while opening the gift. He wanted to be the reason behind it. 

Weird, weird, weird.

Percy meandered around Hogsmeade with Oliver, who begrudgingly came along for the shopping trip, a mixture of being true to his word and feeling absolutely guilty for Percy inadvertently becoming the butt of this little prank.

“Do you think he’d want quidditch things?” Percy wondered, stopping to window shop outside of Quality Quidditch Supplies. 

“I don’t care if he would or not, you’re not getting him anything that could put him at an advantage in the matches,” Oliver warned, shooting a glare at the taller boy. The audacity of even suggesting such a thing. For someone so brilliant, Percy could really be stupid at times, Oliver thought to himself.

“You could get him a beautification potion. See if it does anything for those gnashers of his,” Oliver suggested with a smirk as they resumed walking the cobbled streets together.

Percy scrunched his nose at the idea, failing to find it amusing. He’d never admit it, but generally speaking, he found prominent facial features attractive and quite endearing. GENERALLY SPEAKING. He absolutely didn’t find Marcus or his teeth attractive in any way. What a silly fleeting thought. He shook his head, as though it would manually remove the idea from his brain.

“I wonder what his favorite sweets are?” Percy wondered out loud, not dignifying Oliver’s previous comment with a remark. He led the way towards Honeydukes and grabbed a small shopping basket as he passed through the doors. 

“Bloody hell mate, you’re picking out a Secret Santa gift for Marcus Flint of all people. Not a gift for someone you actually fancy. Just grab something. Could be anything,” Oliver advised and grabbed a basket of his own. He wouldn’t pass up the chance to grab some chocolate frogs and jelly slugs for stocking stuffers for his family, planning to bring them back home with him over Christmas hols. 

Perusing the shop's aisles, Percy added a few things to his basket – a variety of chocolates and candies – hoping that at least something would hit the mark for Marcus. He didn’t want to spend too much of the recommended budget on sweets, though, that was too easy of an out, he thought. 

The boys checked out of Honeydukes with their goodies, and after far too much mulling around the village, Percy finally decided on some Self Correcting Ink – something he found quite useful for quick yet accurate note taking in his classes – and a pair of dueling gloves, in addition to the sweets, to gift to Marcus. These were all things he’d thought Marcus would both use and enjoy. Without personal knowledge of the other boy’s likes and hobbies (besides quidditch, of course) Percy defaulted to practical gifts. Things he’d use, himself.

~~~

Participants in the gift exchange met in the Great Hall following dinner the evening before students were permitted to head back home for the holidays. The head table was littered with wrapped gifts of all sizes, and the heads of houses were gathered round to pass out gifts to their recipients.

Percy sat with the other Gryffindors as one by one, the gifts were handed out, keeping a close eye on packages that were carried to the Slytherin table, not wanting to miss Marcus opening what he’d got him. 

Percy was pleasantly surprised, actually, to see that Marcus seemed to be in good spirits as he waited to receive his gift. He was chatting with a girl beside him who’s name Percy didn’t know, and watching with everyone else as various other classmates of theirs opened their gifts.

It wasn’t too long before Percy watched Snape pick up Marcus’ gift and carry it over to him. Percy had wrapped the package with plain brown paper and finished it off with a green bow.  Why was he so anxious seeing Marcus tug loose the ribbon? It wasn’t often that his stomach felt fluttery yet here he was, his insides squirming as he watched from across the room Marcus ripping the paper from the box and pawing through the sweets inside. 

Marcus was smiling, and it looked good on him. The Slytherin read the label on the Self Correcting Ink bottle and gave a subtle nod, then showed the bottle to the girl beside him. Unsurprisingly, he looked most pleased when he pulled the dueling gloves from the box. He tried them on right away and splayed his fingers in the leather before closing his fist. The action made Percy shiver, and he learned something about himself just then.

Percy immediately looked away when Marcus looked up and started scanning the Great Hall, clearly trying to catch eyes with whoever had bought him the gifts. He knew he’d have to approach the other boy once all of the gifts had been opened, but for now, his stomach was far too fluttery to look at him.

Percy was so lost in thought that he almost didn't notice when his own gift was placed down in front of him on the table. His gift was neatly wrapped in red paper and was quite weighty. It was a book, he knew as soon as he picked it up, and tearing back the wrapping paper would only prove him right. It was a hardback copy of a muggle fiction novel that Percy had read many times, but this one was nicer than the copy the library had, the copy that he was used to. The cover had golden inlaying and smelled of real leather. Who the hell was this from? 

Percy looked up, scanning the room and tuning out the chatter of his classmates around him, who were busy opening their own gifts and speculating with their friends. He first checked the Ravenclaw table, catching eyes with Penelope Clearwater, who only shook her head and shrugged when Percy gave her questioning brows. 

He glanced next at Marcus, mostly just to check that he was still enjoying his presents and caught the boy sinking his teeth into a chocolate frog. They made eye contact and Marcus smiled again , this time definitely at Percy. Weird. 

Percy sat quietly with his book until finally all of the gifts in the exchange had been opened, and it was time to reveal himself to Marcus. His stomach still felt lighter than the rest of his insides, and this was doing odd things to his heartbeat. Why was Marcus coming over here? Percy was supposed to be going towards him.

“Like it?” Marcus asked, standing beside where Percy sat, one hand on his hip, and his gift box tucked under his other arm. He had a smug grin on his face that said he knew he’d done well.

“This is from you?” Percy asked, looking up at the other boy before finally getting to his feet. Sitting down while Marcus was standing just felt funny. Percy wasn't used to feeling small.

“It was. So?” Marcus asked again, now having to look up at Percy. 

“I love it. How’d you know?”

Marcus let out a proud little huff. “Asked Pince what your most checked out book was. Figured you’d need your own copy. You’re too easy to buy for.” 

Percy was completely shocked with this information, and he could feel his cheeks going red. Had it really been that simple? Oliver would be upset to hear that signing Marcus up for the gift exchange hadn't been a distraction for him after all, it would seem.

“Thats– I mean–” Percy shook his head. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Marcus said. The Slytherin looked around, noticing that no one else had approached the pair, leading him to the conclusion that Percy must have been his secret Santa as well. He raised his brow at Percy expectantly.

“Oh, yeah. Yours are from me, too, actually,” he said. “I wasn’t sure what to get you, I hope you like everything?”

“I do, you did good, Weasley, I’m impressed,” Marcus said, the faintest blush gracing his cheeks as he glanced at the box tucked under his arm. He looked Percy over, seeming to be sizing him up. “Happy Christmas, Percy.”

Hearing his first name on Marcus’ lips did something funny to Percy’s stomach, which was already unsettled as it was. And the boys blush? Bloody hell. He was done for. This whole gift exchange thing had gone even better than he’d expected. He’d need to make it a point to find out Marcus’ birthday, as well.

“Happy Christmas, Marcus."

[stromuprisahat]

metvmorqhoses:

Let’s not forget that this grand declaration of love, the “I see you now” (which would have already been top cringe in normal circumstances) is only coming right after the entire country has started to see the said “old friend” as a national treasure and a literal saint lol could it be that the idiot only started to “see her now” because literally everyone else suddenly started to see Alina as special? Worth seeing now? One has to wonder lmao

all of Ravka:

Malyen: I see you now...

sad-outsider:

I think this is from R&R, but I could be wrong🤔

albediz:

Well, I'm not sure either, but I think they're referring to a chapter of ruin and rising. Ruin and Rising Chapter 16 - "I looked down, brushing petals off of the desk. “Did you ever notice me at Keramzin?” He was silent for a long moment, and when I glanced at him, he was looking up at the glass ceiling. He’d gone red as a beet. “Mal?” He cleared his throat, crossed his arms. “As a matter of fact, I did. I had some very… distracting thoughts about you.” “You did?” I sputtered. “And I felt guilty for every one of them. You were supposed to be my best friend, not…” He shrugged and turned even redder. “Idiot.” I think that would be it, but Mal said she feels "guilt" not "shame". Unfortunately, I have this chapter recorded in my memory since it is where Mal and Alina have sex and it is quite depressing.

Thanks. I'm glad I didn't get to it yet.

You can tell he's supposed to be cute by how red he gets. I suspect he might be holding his breath to fool Alina, because it's funnier explanation than "LB's trying to make it heartwarming and adorable by suddenly presenting Malyen as awkward and shy, when some of us remember how he treated Alina previous two books".

But hey- he didn't mean it. He just couldn't bring himself to ask out the only girl he truly wanted. 😉

Thinking about it- this shows the seeds of two cases of terrible gaps between writing and expected perception- Wesper and Zoya.

To keep it short (I wrote about both elsewhere.)- Wesper is presented as a cute relationship, yet when you look, they're a variation on "If he bullies you, he likes you.". Zoya gets traumatic past and a garden for dead people she previously didn't care about to make her vulnerable and tender on the inside. Deep, deep down. Please ignore her mean, cruel behaviour.

Besides, if a guy acted the way Malyen does in a situation like this, I wouldn't interpret it as a shared vision of married future, I'd suspect him he was jerking off above my sleeping form (since there wasn't that many to pick from, and Alina likely believes she's never supposed to touch her nether parts, so she won't even think about that option).

The fact that Malyen felt ashamed of the feelings he had for Alina already tells us a lot about these supposed feelings.

In reality, who would want to fall in love and date a stick...

Hey nonny, next time add a quote or at least a chapter please, because I'm not sure which of his star moments you're refering to. I don't think he ever speaks about shame- that's Alina's domain.

What I DO remember is his surprise he misses his "oldest friend", which like... okay, who wouldn't be shocked to care about losing something they took for granted?

Forgive the sarcasm, but I'll never cease to be baffled this is supposed to be peak romance. I miss my own bed, when away from home. You're telling me he didn't thought he might feel the same about a PERSON he spend most of his life with? One he ALLEGEDLY ~cares~ about?!

That whole scene leading to his great declaration lies somewhere between laughable, pathetic and repugnant. I've already done its analysis, but let's try again:

“Did you miss me, Alina? Did you miss me when you were gone?” “Every day,” I said honestly. “I missed you every hour. And you know what the worst part was? It caught me completely by surprise. I’d catch myself walking around to find you, not for any reason, just out of habit, because I’d seen something that I wanted to tell you about or because I wanted to hear your voice. And then I’d realize that you weren’t there anymore, and every time, every single time, it was like having the wind knocked out of me. I’ve risked my life for you. I’ve walked half the length of Ravka for you, and I’d do it again and again and again just to be with you, just to starve with you and freeze with you and hear you complain about hard cheese every day. So don’t tell me we don’t belong together,” he said fiercely. He was very close now, and my heart was suddenly hammering in my chest. “I’m sorry it took me so long to see you, Alina. But I see you now.”

Shadow and Bone- Chapter 19

“Did you miss me, Alina? Did you miss me when you were gone?” Looking for assurance Alina DID miss him. Which could be innocent, except his next sentence makes it sound as if she chose to leave of her own free will. To abandon HIM.

“Every day,” I said honestly. “I missed you every hour. Trying to outdo Alina in how much. It's pretty childish- Malyen is no poet going for hyperbole, even unintentional, it's as if Alina's feelings weren't enough. HE's the one giving more (and deserving greater appreciation).

And you know what the worst part was? It caught me completely by surprise. Yup! Here's the one on how much did he value her company before she became important to others...

I’d catch myself walking around to find you, not for any reason, just out of habit, because I’d seen something that I wanted to tell you about or because I wanted to hear your voice. Again, another half-innocent sentence, that grows much more negative in context of his previous and following (S&S!!!) behaviour towards Alina. He doesn't seek her out because he enjoys her company, but because he's used to her unwavering presence. It's about what she can do for him.

And then I’d realize that you weren’t there anymore, and every time, every single time, it was like having the wind knocked out of me. Yes, that happens, when you lose a constant in your life, but that doesn't mean you love or care about it. It might be about a comfort of rutine.

I’ve risked my life for you. I’ve walked half the length of Ravka for you ... now he's listing what she should be grateful for as if she asked for any of it. Knowing Alina at this point, steady glance in her direction would be enough, but that's no grand gesture, is it?! This makes me think how often Alina has to listen to the list of what he gave up for her post-R&R. How often he seeks loud appreciation of his "sacrifices". Happy home indeed.

... I’d do it again and again and again just to be with you, just to starve with you and freeze with you and hear you complain about hard cheese every day. So don’t tell me we don’t belong together, Again, this one started nice... for Malyen to fuck it up with the last sentence. That one isn't reassurance. That's an order. What if Alina only wanted to be friends? The excerpt above follows Malyen's anger over Alina's performance at Winter Fete: That night at the palace when I saw you on that stage with him, you looked so happy. Like you belonged with him. I can’t get that picture out of my head. What if Alina realized Baghra was lying and wanted to regain Aleksander's trust? What if she found someone else? What if she decided she has plenty on her plate as it stands, so she won't start a romantic relationship with anyone? The next book will show us neither of those options are an option, when Malyen's concerned. He'll guilt-trip her into being with him want it or not.

And here comes the cherry on the top- I’m sorry it took me so long to see you, Alina. But I see you now. I don't need to be mean to say too little- too late. Hell, Alina could (should) have! This sounds like he's expecting a pat on his head and a badge of honour for his accomplishments. Admitting he wronged her in the past shouldn't earn him a clean slate, he should first change his ways. Not to mention he'll soon prove "see" and "accept" are a whole different beasts.

Geez, it gets worse with every re-read!

[shoot-i-messed-up]

Was always worried about the angst of unrequited love, had never realized the sheer amount of comedic potential that it has.

Imagine one-sided Superbat where Clark is fully aware that Bruce has a crush on him but is being his repressed self about it, and Clark is just like, “I’m not gonna touch that :) you’re going to figure that out for yourself, buddy, and in the meantime, I’m just going to have a good time and be best friends with you as you inevitably pull yourself together enough to either fall out of love or to confess :) and I’ll just let you down gently because I care about you :)” but he absolutely 100% is using it to his advantage in the meantime. His puppy dog eyes had never been so effective before. He’s gotten out of Monitor Duty three times in the past month.

[quackurucho]

i think its very funny how embarrassingly down bad cquackity was for ccharlie Immediately right off the bat. maybe its just their limited improv/semi-lore screentime that enhances the feeling but like he literally just took him, taught him how to gamble for like 40 minutes and then immediately started saying shit like “you are my best friend you are the greatest friend that i have”. there was NOTHING gradual or reluctant about it he pretty much leaped into his arms without question

[hecksupremechips]

Actually cry so goddamn hard when I think about Shinjiro Aragaki healing and being loved and having to learn to be okay with himself and being taken care of

[zemnarihah]

my best friend has been very distant w me lately and i asked today if she wanted to hang out and she said she probably couldn't bc it's her brothers birthday but she would let me know if she could and i have her location and i just looked and she's at her boyfriends house rn....

[belovedrm]

this is truly all i care about to be honest

[milo-is-rambling]

I forget how much I hate the taste of vodka but the whipped cream vodka is so much better my god

[kindacreepy-kindaugly]

.

[atlafan]

…