#literally married with kids

[multivstx]

same energy

[kendyroy]

they’re married with kids. it’s confirmed yall

[reinbouxsworld]

first encounters

[ohmigoshiloveu]

I think about this bit a lot

Bonus:

[aprito]

sos month day 26: undercover / arranged marriage

based off of the tv show the americans which you should all watch btw

[stewykablooey]

funniest thing about stewy is that he’s a fucking anomaly in the roys social circle because not a single person in that family has any fucking friends. they genuinely only fraternize with family or waystar employees and then here comes stewy. the prodigal sons third-oldest friend best friend childhood friend. and guess what. he’s here to cause problems on purpose.

[miabrown007]

Félix: kidnapping is a love language Kagami: you have no social skills, idiot

*two weeks later*

Félix: okay, so when Marinette's at her most vulnerable, I'll gaslight her into thinking I'm her boyfriend, so she'll follow me into an abandoned building where we can put her in an altered mental state and present to her my family's life story in the imaginable most cryptic play of theater she has ever seen, which will reveal to her our horrible secret and the fact that her abusive father-in-law is also her arch-nemesis Kagami: you're so big brained, bae 🥰

[tea-cat-arts]

I simply think this fandom doesn't give Wei Wuxian enough credit for the various ways in which he saved Lan Wangji

[compaculaaa]

New family

[little-pondhead]

Oops.

While learning to control his powers under the guidance of Clockwork, Danny accidentally curses his own bloodline with the Curse of Sentient Food several centuries in the past. Originally, a witch was supposed to curse his family. Oops. Well, the Fentons were always adapting, and technically, either way, he'd end up battling dino nuggets at three am in his underwear, no matter who the curse came from. So he shrugged and continued on.

Unfortunately, this also means that out of nowhere, the timeline shifted, and some of his very distant relatives are now battling their food into submission at every meal because Danny is ultimately way more powerful than some mortal witch from the 1600s. His version of the curse reached literally everyone he could ever be related to for the last few centuries. Even if they were adopted into the family!

So, returning to the present time after training, Danny is a little startled to see some news clips of people's dinners coming to life and beginning revolutions. Wow, John Fentonightingale really got around, didn't he? He felt a little uncomfortable that now all these random people had to deal with their share of Fenton luck, but from some of the interviews, everyone seemed to be handling it pretty well!

Especially his so-distant-they're-on-another-tree cousins, the Kents, who contacted his family directly, asking how best to prepare a zombie turkey. Their son was coming for Thanksgiving with his new wife and some coworkers, and they just refused to make the guests fight for their lives on a holiday!

They invited the Fentons to join them, of course.

[andi-o-geyser]

A compilation of my favourite Perc’ahlia lines because I’m such a sucker for them:

“She is my heart and my judgement and the future that I have chosen.” (Percy)

“Darling, take the mask off.” (Vex)

“Every time I thought I would sink, I would see your face- your face, the first time I truly lost control, and you told me to take off the mask.“ (Percy)

“You're a good person and you're not broken anymore. All right? We're filling each other's gaps. We'll be the glue.“ (Vex)

 “Never forget you’re my favourite.” (Percy)

“I’ve known a lot of people with money, and they are definitely not worth you.” (Percy)

“Nice shootin’, stud.” (Vex)

“You’ll have to amend that one name, just to be fair. It’s Lady Vex’ahlia. Lady Vex’ahlia, Baroness of the Third House of Whitestone and Grand Mistress of the Grey Hunt.” (Percy)

“My heart is someone else’s.” (Vex)

“I should have told you: it’s yours.” (Vex)

“There was a hole in my heart, and I truly believe the only reason I didn't perish from it was because you were holding my heart so tightly. I thank the gods I gave it to you. It is yours, forever and always.“ (Vex)

“I just scream, I scream.” (Vex)

“I need you here now, I need you here.” (Percy)

“You still have a little blood behind your ear.” (Vex)

“But I don’t want to be here if you’re not. Whitestone still needs you, darling. I still need you here.“ (Vex)

“You’re far too wonderful for an idiot.“ (Percy)

“He’s married, to me, and I will cut you.” (Vex)

“You have given me a future I had cheaply sold away.“ (Percy)

“You allowed me to be a part of the thing that you hold dearest. And I was so proud.“ (Vex)

“Vex, I heard you. It was the only thing I heard.” (Percy)

“Were you going to fight the Raven Queen for me?” (Vex)

“I promise to walk into the future with you. I promise to build a family with you. And I promise to always be here for an adventure with you.“ (Percy)

[hanjisungs-bigtittyg0thgf]

GURRRRL

Felix on bubble today was talking about raising kids and it just made me think

“Ughh need a Felix with a breeding kink so bad”

And then he will cherish and spoil the hell out of you and his daughter (cause home boy is a girl dad)

And then

He craves you even more cause you are now his perfect milf

Im screaming

Im very delirious because of that thought all day and working an overtime shift

-🛩️

i just think you and i could be best friends

first off, i LOVE felix as a girl dad, okay. don’t get me started. second - since i always think of him as subby - my brain really itches at the idea of him begging you to take it all and give him a baby. THIRD he absolutely would play into the milf thing and would constantly tease you about it, likely leading to your child asking what a milf is at the tender age of four.

[booksandmore]

i really would not change a single thing about the malec plotline (breakup and all) but sometimes i really do wish we got to see alec date at least one other person yk? and i dont mean that in a pre-cog focing himself to date a woman to hide his sexuality way, i mean in a post-breakup rebound/fling kinda way like i just know the drama would be legendary

[handweavers]

i think i can trace my appreciation for mmf pairings directly to the infernal devices books tbh because they really genuinely were all in love with each other it's so crazy. i don't think anything is ever quite going to affect me in the same way the scene where will feels jem's "death" in clockwork princess did as a teenager like i'll never be that age reading that book at that time again

[the-final-sif]

Putting everything else aside for a moment and the fact this is most likely fake it; is buck fucking wild to see twitter losing it and declaring that a 19/20 year old and a 16/17 year old sexting consensually back in 2019 is """pedophila""" and """grooming""" like. Listen. My friends in high school were fucking at that age and the only one who ended up traumatized by it was me because I got abandoned to do the groupwork by myself. I also had to handle at least one of their breakups which was awkward as hell.

In college I had to listen to the 17 year old in the dorm next to mine get her back blown out every goddamn week because she was horny as hell and hadn't been able to get laid before college. I know at least one of the guys she brought around was like 23. Most were around 20 because the 18 year olds were apparently all still fuckboys. She was nice and again, I was the only one traumatized by thin dorm walls while she had several excellent evenings.

Turns out people in the real world fuck and they don't always care about what age the government has decided you should be allowed to fuck at. Teenagers are dumb and horny and sext each other even when it's illegal or a bad idea. In other news, water is wet and it gets cold during winter.

If you're gonna make up fake shit, goddamn, at least make it something I should actually care about. Because while I do think it's fake, I also don't give a shit about what some horny teenagers were doing 4 years ago.

[cookinguptales]

I love how ConcernedApe was like "no, you may not have children with your adorable monster roommate" and instead of making me less feral, that just encouraged me to marry villagers, divorce them, take full custody, then introduce our children to their new monster daddy.

You made me worse, ConcernedApe.