#literally less than a week after my birthday and TWO DAYS after we closed on a HOUSE

[your-jellyfish-senpai]

Constantly paranoid as of late that I'm going to be fired or laid off or whatever because I have been taking so long to do things.

In my defense, it's things that I've literally never done before. And I'm expected to learn from scratch and do things in the same amount of time as someone who's been doing it for years.

But I don't know if that context is considered every time I have to ask for extensions, which is pretty frequently. It's demoralizing to be so slow and have to think so hard about the things I'm doing.

I was hired primarily to write, but since I was hired, the role has changed, so new hires have different experience. It's just not a good feeling. Even though my manager has said I'm doing well, I feel like I'm floundering.

Update: manager acknowledged that there's a learning curve and it's expected that I won't be as fast until I learn how to do the thing and practice. So that's nice. But hoo boy does it still fucking suck to not be good at things lol.

[likeumeanit9497]

wanna see? | c.s. |

chris sturniolo x fem! reader

summary: during a night of heavy drinking, y/n tells chris that her roommate, who had slept with him weeks prior, had been less than impressed by his skills in the bedroom. chris asks if y/n believes her roommate, and when she says she does, he decides to prove her wrong.

warnings: SMUTTTTT; established friendship; oral (m/f receiving); p in v; DIRTY TALK; unprotected sex; drinking; spanking; ROUGH; 18+

notes: not to gas myself up but...this smut...is insane. i literally wrote all of this in like three hours idk what happened i think my body was taken over by my hormone monster or some shit. but anyways i hope u chris girlies enjoy <333

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“Y/n! Our Uber is two minutes away, are you ready?” My roommate Bree called from the other side of my bedroom door just as I finished applying my lip gloss. “Yep! I’ll be out in a second.” I replied, taking one final look at myself in the full length mirror and adjusting my pleated mini skirt. Satisfied with my appearance, I finally exited my room and found Bree struggling to tie her corset top up herself. “Oh god, let me help.” I sighed, grabbing her shoulders to turn her around so that I could lace her up. “Thanks babe. Oh my god, you look unreal!” She exclaimed, facing me once I was finished, and I smiled sheepishly. “You don’t think it’s too much?” I looked down at my tiny skirt, low cut top, and chunky boots self consciously. “Absolutely fucking not. As a matter of fact I think you should wear that outfit every day for the rest of your life.” She replied before poking my cleavage playfully. I rolled my eyes and laughed. “Oh shut up, let’s go.” I shoved her shoulder jokingly and we both headed for the front door of our apartment.

“So,” I began once we got on the elevator, “Who’s all gonna be there tonight?” Bree’s fingers were flying across the keyboard on her phone, frantically texting someone. “Um…the usual group I think, probably gonna be a few other random people we don’t know yet, but Nick told me they’re keeping it pretty small this year.” She replied as we got into our Uber and I nodded in acknowledgment.

We were heading to the triplets’ house to celebrate their 21st birthday. Bree and I had met Nick Matt and Chris about a year ago, and the five of us had grown extremely close since then. It was a short drive from our place to theirs, but still I pulled out two mini bottles of tequila and handed one to Bree. She raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged. “We didn’t have time for a pre game.” I said simply before raising my bottle to cheers her. She laughed before doing the same, and we both took our shot. “Fucking ew,” She said, shuddering, “I hate tequila.” It was my turn to laugh. “The first shot is always the worst, remember?” She nodded hesitantly. “True enough.”

“So…you think things are gonna be weird with you and Chris? This is the first time you’ve seen him since-” Bree cut me off by waving her hand nonchalantly. “Nah, it’ll be fine. For him it meant nothing, and you already know what it was for me.” I bit my lip to stifle a laugh.

A few weeks ago, I was awoken from my sleep at 3 a.m. by Bree barging into my room to tell me that she had just slept with Chris. This news shocked me, since I knew that she had been pining after Matt since we first met them. When I asked her to explain how the fuck that happened, her only explanation was that she was drunk enough to pretend that Chris was Matt. Initially, I had been concerned that their intimacy would make things weird in our group, but both of them seemed to be completely unbothered by it.

“Alright well, let’s just enjoy the night.” I said as our Uber pulled up to the house. “And who knows, maybe you’ll get lucky with the right triplet tonight.” I joked before walking up to the front door, side by side with Bree. She sighed. “Probably not. Pretty sure all hope of that disappeared once I opened my legs for his brother.”

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Staring at myself in the bathroom mirror, I realized that I was drunk. Bree and I had arrived at the house about an hour ago, and we both immediately took three tequila shots back to back in honour of the triplets’ birthday. Thirty minutes later, we took another trio of shots, and that was more than enough to get me absolutely wasted. I haphazardly reapplied my lipgloss before exiting the washroom and heading back over to the kitchen to grab something else to drink.

“Whoa whoa whoa.” Shouted Nick over the loud music before rushing from the cluster of people he was with and grabbing the bottle of tequila from my hand. “Pretty sure you don’t need any more of that right now. How about some water?” He phrased it like a question, but didn’t wait for me to respond before grabbing a solo cup and filling it with water. I made a weak attempt at protesting, but deep down I knew that he was right; I was so far gone and the night was still young. “Thanks Nicky.” I said once he brought me the cup of water, and he rolled his eyes. “Ew. Don’t call me that. Now come over here and hang out with us.” He led me to the kitchen table, where him, Chris, Matt, Nate, and a few of their other friends were chatting.

“Hey Y/n, you want a shot?” Nate asked, a bottle of vodka gleaming in his hand. Just as I was about to respond, Nick cut me off with an aggressive “No!”, causing me to pout. “Oh yeah, you’re wasted kid.” Chris said with a shot glass in his hand. I looked at him for a moment, taking in his disheveled appearance and blood shot eyes. “Yeah well so are you.” I retorted weakly, and he chuckled. “It’s my birthday, so no judgments allowed.” He said before immediately lifting his glass to cheers with the rest of the group.

I stood there sipping my water slowly as they all took their shots, my eyes focused on Chris’ sharp jaw as he grimaced from the taste of the alcohol. I continued to watch his mouth as he spoke to the person to his right, caught in a drunk trance and intrigued by the rosy colour of his lips.

If I was being honest, I had felt a certain attraction towards Chris since I met him. It wasn’t exactly a crush, and I certainly didn’t have any sort of serious feelings for him, but I would be lying if I said I hadn’t ever been tempted to go there with him before. There was a time, early on in our friendship, where we almost crossed that line.

I had been helping him hang posters on the wall above his bed, when he suddenly tackled me onto the mattress. It started off playful, but after a few moments of us play fighting, he ended up on top of me and the mood in the room completely changed. The smiles on our faces disappeared, and I felt my heart begin to race as his lips moved closer and closer to mine. Just as our lips brushed, the sound of Matt’s footsteps coming down the basement stairs caused us to jump apart, and we never spoke of that moment again.

Outside of that time, him and I had only ever acted as very good friends. As a matter of fact, out of all of the triplets I definitely got along with Chris the best. We both had similar personalities, and could joke around without worrying about hurting each other’s feelings.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by Nick’s voice to my left. “Y/n, did I tell you how unbelievably hot you look tonight?” I giggled, noticing that his voice was beginning to sound slurred even to me, so he was clearly drunk. “You did, but thank you Nick.” I replied, smoothing down my skirt and batting my eyelashes jokingly in his direction. I thoughtlessly glanced at Chris, and found his glossy eyes trailing slowly down my figure; clearly admiring my outfit.

“Hey Y/n, have you seen Bree?” Asked Nate, and I looked around the room quickly, realizing that I hadn’t seen her since I used the washroom. “I saw her go outside a little while ago, probably went to smoke.” Replied Matt, and I smiled to myself knowing that Bree will love the fact that he has been secretly keeping tabs on her whereabouts. “Speaking of Bree,” Chris started, turning back to look at me, “Did she tell you about what happened two weeks ago?”

The group grew silent for a moment as they waited for me to respond. I took a sip from my water and nodded. “She sure did.” Chris smirked. “I’m surprised she even had to tell you. You must have been out cold if you slept through all that noise she was making.” The entire group groaned, clearly disturbed by Chris’ lack of filter. “Oh my god! Goodbye.” Nick threw his hands in the air before storming off to join Madi on the couch in the living room.

I scoffed, grabbing the bottle of vodka from Nate and taking a swig. “Bullshit.” I replied simply, wincing from the burn as the vodka travelled to my stomach. Chris raised an eyebrow. “Oh? How so?” Even in my drunken state I was very aware of the amount of eyes on me awaiting a response. “Well, I asked her to rate the sex on a scale from one to ten. She said six.” The group broke into laughter, and Chris’ jaw clenched as he smirked. “Hmm, funny.” He replied.

“You asked for the wrong number,” Said Nate through his laughter, “You should have asked her for the inches.” Chris grabbed the bottle of vodka from me before bringing it to his lips. “Oh I did,” I smiled, leaning towards Chris’ ear before continuing in a whisper so that only he could hear, “I believe her exact words were, ‘nothing special’.” Chris smirked, swiping his tongue across his front teeth. “Oh really? And you believe that?” He responded, and I nodded, crossing my arms across my chest. “I have no reason to not believe her.” We stood there for a moment, both of us just staring at the other tauntingly as the rest of the group just watched in silence, clearly feeling left out of the conversation all of a sudden. Finally, after letting his eyes travel down my body slowly again, Chris spoke.

“You wanna see for yourself?”

It took every fibre of my being to keep my jaw from physically dropping at his words. “Uh, what the fuck are we talking about here?” Nate said, his voice tentative. I kept my gaze on Chris, hoping that my eyes weren’t giving away how shocked I was. I watched him watch me; his bright blue eyes drilling into mine, his lips upturned in a confident smirk. Realizing I had been silent for too long, I blinked repeatedly and cleared my throat to regain my nonchalant composure before shrugging. “Sure.” I heard Matt groan beside me as I grabbed the vodka from Chris, taking a sip as I followed him towards the stairs to his bedroom. “I’m gonna be sick.” Matt’s distant voice shouted as Chris and I descended the stairs and walked into his dark bedroom.

Once Chris shut and locked his bedroom door, I felt a pit in my stomach begin to grow. I suddenly broke into a fit of laughter from the ridiculousness of this situation. “What are you laughing at kid?” Asked Chris, beginning to chuckle himself. I took a moment to catch my breath before responding. “You’re not actually gonna let me see your dick, are you?” I clutched my stomach as I tried to control my laughter, and he shrugged. “I will if you want to see it.” I bit my lip in contemplation, trying desperately to think properly through my drunk fog. Failing miserably, I nod my head.

Chris smirked. “Come here then.” I put the bottle of vodka down on his desk and walked over to where he was standing in the middle of his room. I stopped about a foot away from him, but he gently pulled me closer. Looking at my face, he finally pulled me up against him; rubbing an uncertain thumb against the small of my back. “Wait, I’m not hard right now.” He chuckled, seeming to have his own moment of consciousness. I smiled up at him and tilted my head, placing a hand on his stomach. “Well I need to see it in its full glory. How else am I gonna know if you’re telling the truth?” His thumb stopped its movement on my back, and a glimmer of something flashed in his eyes.

“Okay, then make me feel good baby.”

My stomach did a somersault at his words, and I wrapped my arm around his shoulders. Leaning forward, I brushed my lips against his before grabbing his bottom lip with my teeth and pulling slightly; watching as it snapped back into place. My right hand slowly traveled down his stomach towards his waistband, where I let it linger for a moment before moving down to his crotch. There, I had to keep myself from audibly gasping; as even through his pants, his fast growing bulge was in fact huge.

Chris smiled lazily as my hand continued to palm his clothed dick. “Impressed yet?” My eyes snapped to his, and I decided to maintain my unimpressed persona. I hummed, my lips touching his but not quite kissing them. “Is this all you got Chris?” I bit his lip once more just before it turned up in a smirk. “Not quite.”

I gasped in shock as Chris spun me around and slammed me against the door, attacking my lips with his own. His kiss was full of a sort of animalistic hunger, and I was consumed by the taste of peppermint and vodka. He pressed me even harder against the wall as he rolled his hips against me, and I fought the urge to whimper at the feeling of his restrained cock against my needy core. He brought both of his hands up and pulled my low-cut top down to free my tits before grabbing one in each hand. Detaching his lips from mine, he took a moment to look at my chest before attaching his mouth to my left nipple; swirling his tongue around its sensitive nerves before moving onto the right.

Pulling away from my tits and once again coming face-to-face with me, he spoke. “Get on your knees.” He placed his hands on my shoulders and began guiding me down to the ground. Now at the same height as his bulging member, I watched as he wasted no time in removing his jeans. Now only concealed by his thin boxers, the true size of his cock was much easier to see. I stared in silence for a moment, taking in the fact that his boxers just barely covered its entire length. “Now do you believe me?” He asked from above me. I struggled to find my words, but I didn’t want to end this crazy game that we were playing, so I shook my head. “I’ve seen bigger.” I replied, looking up at him with doe eyes.

Chris rolled his eyes before pulling his boxers down to his knees. Now fully exposed, his cock smacked my face as it sprung free from its restraint. I couldn’t help but stare at it in awe — it had to be at least eight inches — as the faint light in the room reflected on its beautiful veins. “Open your mouth.” Chris’ commanding voice pulled me from my trance, and I looked up at him in shock. “What?” He tilted his head, “You said you’ve seen bigger, so you should have no problem swallowing this cock. So open your mouth.” His dirty words went right to my heat, and I felt my panties begin to flood with arousal.

Chris used both hands to collect all of my hair and held it out of my face as I wrapped my lips around the first few inches of his cock. Starting slow, I swirled my tongue around his sensitive tip before bobbing my head; taking a bit more of his length with each pump. I released his cock from my mouth for a second to catch my breath, before quickly leaning back in and deep throating his entire length. I heard a hiss escape his lips as my nose brushed against the sprinkle of hair against his lower stomach, and I began moving my head up and down his entire length; making sure to get every inch of him in my mouth.

“F-fuck, Y/n, that’s good. Keep going.” Chris rasped, and he began thrusting his hips at the same pace I was moving at. I moaned around his cock as his grip on my hair tightened; halting my movements entirely as he began face fucking me. Tears welled in my eyes as his cock repeatedly slammed into my throat, and I watched his face as his jaw went slack in both concentration and arousal.

Suddenly, all his movements stopped and he pulled me up to my feet. With his lips on mine and his hands tightly grasping my ass, he walked me backwards towards his bed. Once my heels reached the edge of the bed, Chris reached under my skirt and slid my panties down my legs. Feeling myself lose all sense of control, I didn’t hesitate when he ordered me to lay on my stomach with my ass in the air. I began trying to remove my skirt, but was stopped short by a sharp slap to my ass. “No, leave it on. You have no idea how sexy you look right now.” My back arched subconsciously from his words, and I began to tremble in anticipation.

I felt the bed shift as Chris climbed on, and I shuddered from the heat of his breath against my core as he spoke. “You want to talk shit about how you don’t think I can make girls scream, then you better stay fucking silent.” He gave me barely any time to register his words before his mouth connected to my core. Working his tongue relentlessly against my clit, I buried my face in his duvet to keep from making any noise. Using both hands to massage my ass as he continued to devour my cunt, he very quickly proved to me that he did in fact know how to eat pussy.

His mouth moved from my clit to my opening, and I couldn’t stop the guttural moan from passing my lips as his tongue began to plunge into me. Immediately, he stopped his movements and slapped my ass hard. “What did I say?” He asked, his gravelly voice filled with a sinister edge. “S-sorry.” I replied, pushing my core back in an attempt at reconnecting with his talented mouth. “That’s my good girl.” He replied before finally re-attaching his mouth to my hole. I bit down on my lip — so hard that it began to bleed — in order to keep myself from making another noise as I felt an orgasm approach. Chris continued using his tongue to fuck me as my legs began to shake and my brain grew fuzzy.

Like a tidal wave, my orgasm overtook my body and I began to convulse uncontrollably. I was somehow able to stifle my sounds of pleasure, even when Chris moaned into my pussy as I felt myself squirt all over his face. Without even giving me a moment to recover, Chris straightened his body up onto his knees, grabbed onto my hips, and plunged every substantial inch of his cock into me. At this, I couldn’t help but scream out in shock, and Chris promptly pulled out of me; leaving my dripping core feeling empty. “I told you to shut the fuck up. Do you want me to stop?” He tapped my pussy with his cock as he waited for me to respond. Scared to say anything, I simply shook my head. “Are you ready to admit that Bree was lying?” I turned my head so that I could see him behind me.

“Size doesn’t mean shit if you don’t know how to use it. So go ahead and prove yourself right.” At my words, Chris shook his head as his lips turned up in a smirk. Immediately, his dick slid back into me slowly, and I felt my hole stretch more and more as he bottomed out. He stayed still for a moment, before pulling his hips back so far that his tip was barely resting inside of me; and then slammed all of himself back into my cervix. He continued at this agonizingly slow and deep pace for a while, and used his words to taunt me the entire time.

“You’re such a good girl, taking all my cock like this.”

“I bet you feel so good right now baby.”

“Oh fuck, keep creaming all over this big dick.”

Suddenly, Chris pulled out of me and flipped me onto my back. Wasting no time, he hooked my legs around his neck and pushed his inches back into me. I stared at him, mouth open, as he watched my pussy swallow his cock with each quick thrust. Using one arm to support his weight, he placed his free hand on my stomach and pressed down. “You feel that?” He began, finding the spot where my stomach was bulging, “Feel how deep in your guts my cock can get?” My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I bit on my own arm to stifle the noises that were dying to escape it as I felt my second orgasm approaching.

Chris seemed to notice my impending climax, as he leaned forward to reach even deeper into me. “You want to cum, hmm?” He cooed, bringing a hand to my cheek. With my face contorted in the confusing combination of pleasure and frustration, I nodded my head. He moved my arm away from my mouth and planted a deep kiss there. “You can cum as hard as you want, just as soon as you tell me how good my cock makes you feel.” I whined silently, my overstimulated nerves causing my body to fill with a sudden desperation. “Come on, Y/n,” Chris brought his thumb down between our bodies and began rubbing my clit, “I want you to cum for me.”

I was panting now, feeling as though I might explode from the overwhelming pressure within my body. I was quickly realizing that I was losing this battle, and it was time to throw in the towel.

“Fuck Chris you’re so big.” I nearly screamed out, gripping onto his shoulders in a weak attempt at keeping my composure. “Feels so good, please let me cum.” I begged, and watched his face as his pupils dilated from my words. “That’s my girl. Now let go.” His hips continued pounding into me as I finally gave into my orgasm, and I lost all control of my mind as I spewed a plethora of moan-filled profanities into the room. My walls contracted uncontrollably around his girth as my orgasm tore through my body, and I felt my nails dig into the skin on his shoulders.

“Oh fuck Y/n, gonna cum too. Where do you want me?” His words came out shaky, and I didn’t hesitate before responding, “In me, please baby.” I begged, wanting to feel his warm seed spill into my worn out core. “Shiiit.” He hissed, his body slowing to a near-halt as he rode out his own orgasm. With slow, lazy thrusts, he pushed his cum deep into me as his cock twitched repeatedly.

Eventually, his movements stopped completely, and he slowly pulled out of me and walked towards his bathroom. When he returned, he came back with a towel and used it to help clean me up in silence while I caught my breath.

“I might be drunk,” He started, “But that was hot as fuck.” I laughed, holding my spinning head before sitting up. “We are never to speak of this again.” I said as I got to my feet to retrieve my underwear. “Sure sure…until the next time we do it right?” I rolled my eyes at his response and nudged his shoulder playfully. “Shut up. I need a shot, let’s go.” I headed for the door once he was fully clothed and together we began to climb the stairs. “How likely is it that everyone up here knows what we did?” I whispered to him as we neared the top. “Oh very likely, but who cares? It’s my birthday, so no judgments allowed.” He winked at me as we made it to the kitchen, where everyone’s eyes immediately landed on us.

“Oh god.” I muttered under my breath as I hurried over to Bree, who was smiling knowingly at me as she began pouring out two shots of tequila. “Please tell me one of these are mine.” I whispered to her, and she laughed. “It sure is. You have a good time down there?” She wiggled her eyebrows as she handed me a slice of lime. “If you really meant it when you said his dick was ‘nothing special’, then I’m gonna need the names and numbers of the guys you were ranking him against.” She tilted her head back and exploded into laughter before lifting her shot glass in the air and urging me to do the same. “You got it, babe. Just as soon as I get Matt to fall in love with me.” I laughed, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek before raising my own glass. “Cheers!”

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[harryforvogue]

hello. here she finally is, the harry and mia blurb (which i also offer as the 200k reads celebration story). i hope you like her. she's like 7k words so she DID take some years off my life but it's okay. as long as YOU guys are happy hehe. there is basically no smut in this, but i like to think it's quirky and funny. happy reading! and thank you, as always, for you patience <3

i literally cannot come up with a synopsis for this so. yeah. just read it THANKS LOVE YOU BYE!

***

Just two weeks ago, Harry and Mia had been invited to a birthday party.

To be specific, which is very necessary in this situation, they were invited to a kid’s birthday party. Harry had promoted one of his employees to a high position, and as a thank you, the woman had invited Harry and a plus one to her child’s 6th birthday party. Harry had looked down at the invitation wondering if there was a typo. He couldn’t fathom the idea of going to a regular birthday party, much less a kid’s one.

But his employee had insisted. And Harry had hinted that taking him out for lunch or something would be even better in his books, but the women refused to budge. So a few days later, Harry and Mia stood in a venue with drinks in their hands, dodging children left and right.

His arm was slung around her waist. Mia was quiet for some time, a pensive look on her face as she watched the child who was “it” bellow, “CHAAAARGE” before sprinting to tag the other kids. Usually, something like this would make her twitchy, but something about her still figure and soft brown eyes made him ask, “What do you think? Should we get one?”

Mia had blinked at him. “A kid?”

“No, a bouncy house.”

“Oh. Um. Well, I wouldn’t be opposed, but…”

“Mia. Never mind. Yes, a kid.” He sighed deeply and slanted his head towards her, his brows raised. “Thoughts?”

“I mean…” They’d talked about it before. And both of them wanted children. But it seemed like something that would happen after the wedding. But even that was really close – in three short months. “You know I want your kids.”

Harry laughed softly and shook his head. “You always emphasize that they’d be mine as if I’d expect them to be somebody else.”

“Well, you know,” she smiled back, nudging his shoulder with hers. “I have to remind you that they’ll all have your big head.”

“You love my big head.”

“I do.” She took a sip of her drink. “And you? Think we should get on it?”

If it were up to Harry, he would have liked to wait just a year more. He wasn’t in a rush. Though recently he had been enjoying the idea of having a baby to erase, and the feeling was always tainted by terror. “Maybe when my job is a little…”

Mia nodded. “Yeah.”

Harry had been so busy recently. His father’s company had just bought another, right before the end of the fiscal year. They had so much to work on for reports. It was driving him insane and causing him to work overtime. He just needed to get over his hurdle. And then he’d relax. He’d come home on time. He’d have more time to take Mia out rather than force her to attend a birthday with him. This felt like work anyways.

“But I do look forward to it,” he’d insisted, kissing the top of her head. He watched as two kids ran into each other and began sobbing on the floor. “Well. Mostly.”

A week later, Mia had come out of the bathroom at night with a pregnancy test in her hand. Her eyes were wide, hesitant. “I thought it would be funny,” she said, “if it was negative because I missed a period and–” 

She handed him the test. “You said you wanted kids a little later… what if we had one in nine months?” She looked at the wall, dazed. “Well. Seven months really, if I’m doing the math correctly. Which I’m probably not. You know what? It doesn’t matter. I think you get the point.”

Harry peered down at the test. It was a very solid positive. He’s silent for a moment. Then – “Holy shit.”

���I know,” Mia whispered, joining him on the bed. “It’s a lot. But we’ve talked about it, right? And we’re getting married and you know it was gonna happen eventually. I mean–”

“Mia.”

“-- I’m just saying that with the amount of sex you and I have, protected or not, it’s totally a miracle that we haven’t gotten pregnant already. And yeah I know we ditched the protection, and birth control doesn’t always work but–”

“Mia.”

“--what I’m trying to explain is that I’m totally okay with this. I might be freaking out a little bit and I might have had a mini panic attack in the bathroom but I really just–”

“Mia.”

She buried her face in her hands. “What?”

“I fucking love you.”

He’d taken her wrists and tugged. When she gave up and let him, he grabbed her face and kissed her so hard, she squeaked in surprise, steadying herself with a hand on his chest. “That,” he murmured through the kisses, “was such a Mia way of telling me. You are unbelievable. I’m never going to get used to you.”

Her eyes had immediately welled with tears. “Yeah? This is all right? We can work with this right? I mean, I’ll likely have to get the dress tailored again but I don’t think I’ll be showing that much in two months.” She leaned in and kissed him again and again until he felt her tears on his own face.

“This is perfect,” he’d whispered, holding her tight until she was gasping for breath. “I fucking– Mia. Mia. You make it so hard when you give me all these gifts.” And then he was grabbing her again, making her straddle him. He kissed her again and again, unwilling to take breaks in between even when his lungs were aching for air.

“You,” he said softly, “are everything. Listen to me. Everything. And we’re going to celebrate tomorrow, okay? Anything you want. All day. Nobody can bother us. How’s that sound, hm?” He kissed her. “I love you. I love you so much I can’t think straight.”

When Mia fell asleep on his chest that night, his mind was racing with ideas on what they could do tomorrow. What could he do that could compare with the things she’s done for him? He held her tight. He was going to be the best damned father anyone had ever met. He couldn’t be anything less than that.

***

The next morning, Harry’s phone begins to ring. And it continues to ring until Mia groans and reaches over him to grab it. She looks down at the caller ID with squinted eyes. It’s as if a bucket filled with ice water has been thrown over her.

“Hey,” she whispers to Harry, pushing his shoulder to wake him. “It’s your father.”

He tucks his head against her neck. “Ignore it.” His voice is raspy.

She lets it ring until it stops. “You already have two missed calls from him. What if something happened? Like the company suddenly went bankrupt overnight? Like something with the stocks. Like the Great Depression? Do you know how bad the Great Depression was?”

“Then I guess I’m unemployed. I’m so sad.” He doesn’t sound sad at all. His arm that’s thrown over her waist tightens and he pulls her back down until she’s against the pillows again. “Go back to sleep.”

“Fine, but don’t blame me when you wake up destitute.” She closes her eyes when Harry’s warm body begins soothing her back into a peaceful state. Her eyes are heavy again. Nothing is more comfortable than Harry’s hold lulling her to sleep.

And then Harry’s phone rings again. It rings and rings until Harry finally raises his head and swears under his breath. He grabs his phone and puts it to his ear. “Hello,” he answers in a very not so kind voice.

“Harry,” Mia hears his father’s voice through the phone. She opens her eyes and glances up at Harry. “Why haven’t you been taking my calls?”

“It’s 5 in the morning on a Sunday,” Harry replies tensely.

“You will be having dinner with your step mother and I tonight.”

He doesn’t even bother asking. He just demands it. Mia watches Harry rub his eyes and sit up, turning away from her onto his side. “I’ve got plans tonight. Maybe another night.”

“No, tonight. I’ll be out of the country next week.”

“I can’t tonight.”

“You may bring Amelia as well.”

Harry pauses. He doesn’t correct him about her name as he always does. “I’d have to ask her.”

“I need to speak to you urgently about a matter regarding the company.”

“We can do this over a video call.”

“Harry, I’m not asking you. I will send you an address and you will show up. With your girlfriend or not, it matters little to me. This is an important conversation we must have.”

“Fiancée, actually. Which I’ve told you,” he says. He takes a breath and pinches the bridge of his nose. Mia knows Harry’s getting angry at his father from the long pauses he keeps taking. She knows he’s trying to calm himself down before he says something completely out of turn. She sits up and rests her head on his back, holding onto his arm.

“It’s okay,” she murmurs, rubbing her hair against him. “We can go.”

He turns his head to look at her, his eyes wide. He pulls the phone away. “I wanted to celebrate with you.”

“We can do it another time.”

“No. This needs to be celebrated immediately.”

She smiles sleepily, raising her head to look at him. “We have, like, seven months to celebrate.”

His jaw tenses as he brings his phone back to his ear. She nods encouragingly and then lays back on her side, tucking herself under the warm sheets. She feels him staring at her a few seconds before she hears his soft voice say to his father, “We will be there.”

“Good,” his father says. “I will send over the details.”

“All right. Bye.”

She hears him turn his ringer off and then set his phone to the side. He gathers her into his arms and holds her close. His lips press to the top of her head. “I’m really sorry, Mia.”

“Don’t be,” she laughs softly. “Nothing we haven’t done before.”

“I know. But still.” His voice is quiet and sad. “I wanted to celebrate.” His hand slides over her stomach. “Take you somewhere nice.”

“I’m sure the restaurant your father picks will be nice.”

“I wanted to take you somewhere nice and alone.”

“We can do that any other day.”

He’s quiet again. “Yeah.” Before she falls asleep, she hears Harry apologizing again, barely audible.

***

Mia walks in on Harry pulling his freshly tied tie off his neck. He mutters a swear and tosses it on the bed and unbuttons the top two buttons of his shirt, pulling his collar open. With a deep breath, he makes eye contact with Mia through the mirror. She’s in a long summer dress and white sneakers, pulling her jacket on. She’s done her hair in loose curls and pinned the front pieces out of her face. She smiles at him, but he doesn’t smile back, clearly lost in his thoughts. 

“Hey,” she says, frowning. She takes his hand and walks around to stand in front of him. “It’s okay.”

His eyes are distant. “I want a day off with just you and me. I’ve been working so much, I feel like I’ve barely seen you. And we live together.”

Mia presses his hand to her cheek. She feels his knuckles gently caress her skin upon contact. “I know. But things come up. We can have a day to ourselves next week.” She frowns deeper. “Oh wait. We promised Amara and Zack we’d do a double date.”

At the reminder of the plan, Harry looks pained. “We can just not show up.”

“That would piss him off.”

“Who cares? I’m pissed off right now.”

Mia stands on her tiptoes, wrapping her arms around his neck. A smile takes her face again, and she’s suddenly leaning in to gently kiss the corner of his mouth. “Well, I hope you know that you’re so cute when you’re pissed off.”

“I’m serious.” His voice loses a bit of its agitated tone. He holds her waist.

“As am I. Now come on. Stop brooding and look a little more happy. I’m having your child, after all. You owe me smiles for the next seven months.”

At that reminder, his eyes light up and one dimple appears. Then another. He holds her face and tugs her closer. “You’re absolutely right.”

She grins and then melts into the embrace when Harry kisses her. “I am always right.”

Mia doesn’t know how some people are able to keep the news as a secret until their partner is ready to take it. When she looked down at the positive pregnancy test last night, her first thought was to tell Harry. There was no way she’d be able to keep it to herself.

She lost count of how many times he whispered “thank you” and “I love you”.

Harry was in such a mess, they weren’t actually able to make love like she thought they would. Every time Harry would hold her face to kiss her, he’d tear up again and drop his head, whispering the words again, mixed with a healthy and colorful amount of soft, incredulous swears.

“I was thinking, actually,” he murmurs once he pulls away. He twists a strand of her hair around his finger. “We should go for a vacation. To celebrate, I mean.”

Mia says, “You know I am always ready for a getaway.”

“Mhm.” He kisses her again. “And when we come back, we can start telling people? Is that a thing that you do so early?”

“Well, I don’t have any other children so it’s hard for me to know.”

“Then maybe we wait until the second trimester.”

“Should we do a gender reveal party?”

Harry thinks about it as he kisses her once more. “Dunno. I mean, I would totally be okay with finding out the day off.”

Mia’s eyes light up. “I was thinking that too.” She slides her hands down his shoulders, fixing his collar along the way. “I would be happy with a boy or a girl.”

“Me too.”

“And should we do something like a big reveal for our friends and parents? No wait. I’d actually rather tell my parents in person.”

“Is that where our vacation will be? Staten Island?”

She fakes a shudder. “Don’t even joke about that.”

He kisses her for a final time, a very long kiss that has her pressing herself against him, his hands on her waist, feeling the warmth of her skin. And when he pulls away, Mia laughs softly and wipes his mouth. “Lipstick,” she whispers. Harry cleans up the corner of her mouth with his own thumb. “We should head out soon.”

Harry sighs deeply and nods. “Let’s get this over with, hm?”

“Let’s.”

***

Despite having been with Harry for four years, it still shocks her whenever they go out to a place as fancy as this. Because although Harry and her do go to expensive places, they’re never as high end as the ones his father picks. Harry complains that the super expensive places don’t have edible food, which she has to agree with. Looking at the menu in her hands, she scans it for anything that she even recognizes.

Most of the time, she has to elbow Harry gently and ask him what these dishes are. Unfortunately, Harry is having a discussion with his father about the company, something she usually just tunes out.

At least she’s decided what drink to have. And the post dinner dessert.

Harry jokes with her that she should listen to how the company is run or at least know its primary functions. He says that if he ever got sick, she’d have to step in to run the company for him. Mia’s not all that sure how much of that is the truth. They wouldn’t just give the company to anybody, right? Harry reminds her that his father handed a large part of the company over to him despite Harry not having the experience. Mia argues that that is a classic story of nepotism. Harry argues back that him giving her his job is also nepotism.

You really can’t win with rich people, Mia says, ending the conversation there.

After they’ve ordered (Mia playing it safe by ordering exactly what Harry does), they sit in relative silence until Harry’s father clears his throat and says, “Well, I have news to give you, Harry. In fact, tomorrow morning, we can start on the paperwork.”

Harry says, “Paperwork?”

“Yes. I’m sure you know of all the board meetings we’ve been having over the course of the past two months, and there have been rumors here and there, but I’d like to actually come straight to you to say it. I am stepping down as chief executive officer.”

Harry takes a sip of his water. “Great. Who’s the unlucky fellow that gets to take your place? Is this about voting? I told you having an even number of board executives was a bad idea for this very reason.”

Something flashes over Harry’s father’s face. Surprise, perhaps. “Well, I wouldn’t just hand the position over to just anybody.”

“Right. Do you want me to look over performance reviews and applications?”

“Harry,” Mia says softly.

He glances down at her and then his father. Then his step mother. Realization dawns. “Oh.”

“Yes. I will be passing duties over to you.”

Mia watches the expressions pass over his face. Confusion, surprise, then… something else.

“It was always set in stone that I would pass the company to you, son. I did think I would continue to be CEO for at least another 2 years, but I think it’s an excellent time for me to retire. The company is stable. The revenues have increased every year, our profit margins are better than ever. There are few fires to put out in distinct subsidiaries, but this previous quarter has been exceptional.”

“Right.”

“It is not only because you’re my son. It’s also because of your commitment to the company. You have been strict in hiring and following the companies values. Your negotiating skills have never been more excellent. We gained a new subsidiary that brings in massive amount of profits because of you. The contracts you’ve renewed this year alone are commenable. You’ve put in the work and you deserve this position.”

“Right.”

“We will start the paperwork tomorrow.”

Mia realizes what’s on Harry’s face. Dread.

Because Harry’s never wanted that position. She knows it. Sometimes, he’d reveal to her that it was the only position left for him if he were to excel past his current one, and that he wasn’t sure how he’d react to the news. They all thought it would be a couple more years until this discussion was brought up.

But now it’s here. Harry is reaching for his water again, taking slow slips in thought.

The silence is unnerving. Mia puts on a bright smile and exclaims, “This is wonderful news! Congratulations, Harry!”

His step mother raises her glass in a toast and everyone except Harry clink theirs together. “Congratulations!”

“I understand it’s a shock,” his father says after drinking his wine. “But it is for the best of the company. I leave it in good hands.” He glances up at the waiter. “Thank you.”

As the plates are getting set in front of them, Mia puts her hand on top of Harry’s under the table. She notices that his fingers are cold, so she rubs them softly.

“You know what?” Harry suddenly says when the waiter leaves. He pulls his hand out from under hers abruptly. “I’ve got to get some air. I’ll be right back.” He pushes his chair out. “Excuse me.”

Mia watches him quickly walk out of the restaurant while undoing one more button of his shirt. Normally, she’d be annoyed that she’s been left with the shark of a father he has, but now, concern runs through her. She’s already on the edge of her seat when Harry mutters an apology to the host and exists.

She glances back at his father and step mother. They don’t actually look perturbed.

“I would have thought he’d gotten used to all this,” his step mother says, cutting into her steak carefully. “Does it always take him time to get used to something?”

“Yes,” his father says, chewing already. “He’ll be fine.” He looks at Mia. “How have you been, Amelia? The wedding planning is complete, yes? How’s the job going? You know, my offer at the company still stands. Well, now it’ll have to go through Harry, but I’m sure that the position he can get you would pay far better than the one you currently h–”

“Actually,” Mia says, standing up. She winces at the way her chair screeches against the floor. “I am so sorry. I’m, um, I’m going to check on Harry.”

His father waves his fork in the air. “Go on ahead. Talk some sense into him.”

She offers a nod of some kind and then walks out, trailing after Harry. She also apologies to the host and promises her return.

He hasn’t gone too far. In fact, he’s right out the restaurant, pacing with his hands tucked into his pockets. 

“Harry.” She jogs over to him, grabbing his blazer sleeve, stopping him in his step. “Hey. Hi.”

He looks at her with frantic eyes. “I’m not taking that job. I can’t take it. I can’t.”

“Okay. That’s okay.”

He stares at her for a moment before wrapping his arms around her, hugging her tight against his front. His heart is beating fast. “Mia. I don’t– Mia.”

“It’s okay.” She feels him drop his head to her shoulder. He takes a deep, shaky breath.

“I don’t want to be the CEO.”

She rubs his back. “I know.”

“I always thought it would be fine, yeah? Take on a few more responsibilities. But…”

“It’s just not what you want.”

“Is it wrong? I’ve always known, so is it cheating by refusing now? I mean. I know people who would kill for this job. My father probably thinks I’m being ungrateful.”

Mia shakes her head. “Well, you’re not. You’re trying your best, and this just doesn’t interest you. You don’t want it.”

“Maybe 5 years ago it’s what I would have wanted. I wanted to prove that I could be something big. Prove it to my dad. But things are different now. I don’t want to prove anything to anyone. I feel as if I’m different. You and I are different.” He squeezes her. 

“I understand,” she whispers. “I know.”

“What difference will it make anyways? We’re more than comfortable right now. I’m miserable at my job and I will be miserable as CEO.”

This is news to her. “I thought you were enjoying it a bit more.”

“No.” His voice is muffled against her dress. “You think I like a job that doesn’t allow me to see you?” He suddenly lifts his head and holds her waist tight. “Mia, this past week alone, I’ve come home so late that you’re already asleep. I don’t want that.” She sees something like fear in his eyes. “I didn’t pay attention to you the first time. And look what that did to our relationship. It was entirely my fault. I can’t do that again. I can’t handle that. I won’t ever show up. But that’s what we agreed on all those years ago, right? That I’d be there?”

“Harry…”

“I’ve been so good at showing up and that’ll all change if I take the job. There’s a reason why my parents never worked out. Why I never had a good relationship with my dad.” His eyes are wide, frantic. “I can’t be my father. I don’t want to be. I would never want to be. I can’t do that to you. I can’t do that to…” He puts a hesitant hand on her stomach. “God, I’d hate myself if I did that.”

“Harry…” Mia surges forward and throws herself at him, hugging him so tight, she feels her own ribs hurting. He holds her just as tight, head against her shoulder once more. “Oh, I love you, you beautiful person. I love you so much.”

“Yeah?” he whispers, turning his head to kiss her cheek. “Is that all right, then? If I say no?”

“I think you should say no, then quit your current job and let me be the income earner for the rest of the year. Won’t be able to pay for the wedding though. You’ll have to chip in. A lot.”

Harry chokes out a laugh. “We’ll honeymoon for the rest of the year.”

“As long as it’s not in Staten Island,” she giggles, planting kisses after kisses on his jaw. “I love you. Got that? I love you always.”

He pulls away slightly to look at her, apprehension in his eyes. “Always? Are you sure? It’s…it’s not easy loving me.”

Harry’s never been the type to ask Mia to remind him she loves him. She knows he knows that she adores him more than anything. But now, he’s asking, and he’s looking so hopeful with his pretty green eyes under the golden lights outside the restaurant. He’s looking all over her face, his gaze often lingering on her mouth.

“Are you kidding me?,” she suddenly laughs. “Harry. You know loving you has never been difficult for me. And not to mention, you’re kinda stuck with me. We’re reproducing after all.”

Harry groans. “Is that how you’re going to break the news to everyone? Hey guys, just wanted to say that my fiancé and I did have unprotected sex—“

“Wait! That’s basically what people say when they’re like oh yeah we’re trying. Like hmm okay, but we know exactly what’s going on no matter how cute you make it sound!”

“And yet it’s still better than we banged and here we are.”

Mia smiles. “But we did bang and here we are indeed.”

“Listen.” He takes her clip out of her hair and fixes her short strands back again. “Tell your friends however you’d like. But my family will be told a very specific, expensive way.”

“Like a party? You don’t like them.”

Harry shrugs. “I don’t seem to oppose the idea of celebrating such a big thing, though. As long as I get to kick people out on time.”

“But with Amara and Zack—“

“I give you full control.”

“Good. I want to make them cry.” She looks very determined. “I want them to be fighting for their life. Choking, even.”

Harry says, “Er, yeah. Whatever you want.”

“Maybe we can tell your father and step mother right now.”

Harry drags the back of his hand against her cheek. “Yeah?”

“I mean, you’re going to have to give a reason why you’re declining. And you can’t just say it’s because you love me so so so so so much.”

“Oh yeah? And why not?” He squishes her face, pulling her close, his voice tender. “Why can’t I refuse on the basis of loving my fiancée so so so so much?”

Her eyes light up. “Because that’s super out of character for you. He might think you’re sick. Although I’d love to see the look on his face.”

“Me too. He might have a heart attack at the idea of his son being happy.”

Mia suddenly frowns. “Don’t say that. That makes me really angry.”

“I know. Hey. We should go and make him angry instead, hm?”

“I like the way you think, Styles.”

He smiles and kisses her quickly. “Come on.” He takes her hand. “Let’s ruin their day.”

They share one more look before they head back inside. When they reach the table, they’re not surprised to see their plates untouched and the others nearly finished. They sit back down. 

“Have you finished with your dramatics?” Harry’s father says calmly.

“I will be refusing the promotion.”

Well, shit, Mia thinks. Just getting straight to it then.

His father’s eyes narrow as he slowly puts his fork down. He then takes a sip of his wine. Finally, he clasps his hands on the table. “And why, might I ask?”

“I have other priorities I need to focus on.”

“Something that is more important than your career?”

“Yes.”

“There is nothing more important to a man than his career.” His father shakes his head. “I’m disappointed. I wish you’d have learned this by now. You should take time to think this over. It won’t even be such a big difference.”

Harry says, “I have a different future in mind for myself. Something I think is more worthwhile.”

His father’s eyes narrow some more before they turn on Mia. “And I assume this decision is due to your influence as well.”

“I don’t think I influence Harry to do anything. I like to think I just encourage him.” Mia hates how she doesn’t sound confident in herself. “This is something we both happen to believe in.”

“He would not make this decision if it weren’t for you.”

Mia catches the bitter, criticizing tone, and so does Harry. She can tell by the way he tenses.

“Do not,” he says tightly, “speak to her like that. I am refusing the position and that is my final answer.”

Mia’s surprised when Harry’s getting up to leave. She scrambles to do the same, taking his outstretched hand. “Um. Goodnight,” she says even though Harry’s already dragging her away. The look on his father and step mother’s face is priceless. Mia wishes she could photograph it, blow it up, and put it on a blanket. It would make for an excellent anniversary gift.

Harry’s walking so fast, she needs to jog a little to keep up with him. When they get to the car, he stops and looks up at the sky. He laughs a little, but Mia’s sure he’s not finding anything particularly amusing. “Well, shit.”

“Uh, is he going to come after us?”

“Of course not.”

“Right.” She needs to say something to make him feel better. Anything. Anything ridiculous. “I wished we packed up the food. It looked really good.”

It works. He snorts and unlocks the car, releasing her hand. “Relax. I’ll feed you. Let that be the least of your worries.”

They sit in the car, but Harry doesn’t start it right away. Instead, he holds the steering wheel and takes several more deep breaths. After a moment of silence, Harry puts his head on the wheel.

Mia rubs his back. “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.”

Harry doesn’t reply for some time. His eyes are shut, his eyebrows furrowed. She continues to rub his back and lean over to kiss his curls.

Finally, his eyes open and he sits back up. He secures his seatbelt and then starts the car. “Okay. Let’s go home. No wait. We have to feed you first. Then we go home.”

“We can place an order for pickup.”

“An excellent idea. Let’s do that.” He gives her a pointed look. “Pick a place and order from it. Without any fuss.”

Mia smiles. “Yes, sir.”

His eyes narrow and he leans in for a kiss. “Good.”

He puts the car in drive.

***

“Should we buy a baby name book? I saw one the other day that had a thousand in them.” Mia bites down aggressively on her crouton.

“I’m pretty sure we can agree on a name collectively,” Harry answers.

“We don’t ever agree on anything collectively.”

“Touch.”

“This is really good. Are you sure you don’t want to try it?”

He looks at the monstrosity in front of her. A caesar salad but she’s coated it with pickle relish instead, and her pasta is covered with so much cheese and oregano, he can barely see the pasta underneath. She twirls her pasta on her fork and then stabs her relish covered romaine lettuce, shoveling it all into her mouth.

“No, thank you,” he says. “I’m sure it’s…very delicious.”

“Not even my drink?”

She’s having orange Fanta to top it all off. “I’m okay, baby. You know, if we weren’t sure that you were pregnant before, we’re definitely sure now.”

“You’ve gotta remind me that I need to get a doctor’s appointment. I can get it for Friday afternoon if that works for you.”

She says it so casually, it makes him pause, his drink half way to his lips. He puts his glass down. “No. I’ll get leave for it.”

She glances at him. “You don't have to. I mean I’m sure you've got a lot to talk about with your dad and taking off in the middle of the week won’t be so good.”

“It doesn’t matter.” He frowns. “It’s time your schedule stopped depending on mine. You know what? I should start taking three days off a week.”

“You already come home early on Fridays.”

“They can survive another day without me.”

Mia shoves another crouton in her mouth. “You know I love having you in the house. Maybe if you can't get another day off, you can work from home.”

“Yes.” His mind is spinning with possibilities. “That’s a good idea too.”

“I am full of them.”

Harry takes his napkin and leans over the table, gently wiping the corner of her mouth. “You sure are.”

Mia quickly finishes up her food. Harry passes her water to have insead of the Fanta and she drinks it down quickly before getting up and walking over to his side. He spreads his legs when he sees her coming, patting his thigh. She falls into his lap easily.

“Hey,” she whispers, tucking her head against his shoulder. “I’m a little scared.”

His arms are tight around her immediately. “Of my father? Don’t worry about that. I’ll handle it.”

She holds his shirt tightly. “No it’s not that. I know you can deals with him.”

“Then what is it, baby?” He kisses her forehead and runs his fingers through her hair. “Tell me.”

She’s quiet for a moment until she says, “What if I’m not a good parent?”

“Oh, Mia.”

“I mean, I wasn’t even around kids at any point in my life. And I don’t have young siblings. I’m going to have to buy a ton of parenting books. I don’t even know anything. Did you know that you’re not supposed to warm milk up in the microwave for babies?”

Harry gently tugs her chin up so she can look at him. “Mia, between us, I think I should be the most worried about being a bad parent.”

“Harry, I know you’re going to be the best dad, and I’ve never been more confident of anything in my life. But me? I don’t know. I just learned how to start caring for myself, and sometimes it feels like I’m still learning. You’re going to be perfect though.”

He shakes his head. “There’s no such thing as a perfect parent. There’s a big difference between a good parent and a bad one though.” He takes a breath. “We are going to try our best. Right? Isn’t that all we can do?”

“Right,” she whispers, turning her face against his neck, her nose against the column of his throat. “Together.”

“Always. You said it yourself.”

She sniffles. “Are you scared too?”

“Absolutely fucking terrified. But I’m also excited. And also very relieved that it’s you I get to share this with.”

She raises her head. “Me too.” She sits up, blinking her grey, teary eyes at him. “ But I’m also sad. You’re going to be such a hot dad.” Her lip begins to wobble. “And I’m going to have to pry all the women off of you when you drop our baby off at daycare.”

Harry tries very hard not to laugh. It doesn’t seem like the appropriate time. “I will not even give them the time of day.”

“I should get a shirt that says That DILF is Mine!”

“As long as I get a matching one.”

He wipes her tears away, ruining her mascara in the process.

She sniffles some more. “I really wanted to have sex tonight but now I can’t stop crying.” She buries her face in her hands and cries harder. “This is r-really,really bad.”

Harry can’t help laughing then. He clutches her close to his chest and rests his head on hers. “Exactly how I felt yesterday.” He rubs her back as she’d done to him in the car. “It’s been a long day. It’s going to be okay. I know it’s very overwhelming.”

For some time, he lets her cry, thinking of ways to make her feel better. “Hey, I was thinking,” he finally decides, “if it’s a boy, maybe we can name him Axel.”

That gets her to stop crying. She immediately says in an icy voice, “I will divorce you.”

“Well, how about something classic like Bobby.”

She pulls away from him quickly. Her eyes are dark and annoyed, eyelashes still wet. Her nose is red, her cheeks pink. She looks like a vision. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“No?” he says innocently, wracking his brain for another terrible idea. “How about Clover for a girl?”

“You’re messing with me.”

“Delilah?”

She growls, “What is this – the early 2000s? I’m buying that baby name book tomorrow. You’re terrible at this!”

“I will admit I’m not the best at naming things. I named my cousin’s dog Pikachu.”

“You’re lying.”

He wipes her face gently. “Nope.”

“I will be naming this child.”

“I absolutely refuse to give you that right. Are you angry? Now you won’t have sex with me because you’re mad, right?”

Her eyes narrow. “On the contrary. I want to have sex with you even more now.”

Harry laughs and gathers her close, standing up. Her legs immediately wrap around his waist. “So romantic. Well, since you insist.”

She’s still going on about how terrible his name picking skills are when they arrive in their bedroom and Harry gently puts her in the middle of the bed.

He sighs dramatically, unbuttoning his shirt with one hand as he looms over her. “Well, it seems like I’m really, truly wrong. I guess the only thing I must do now is apologize.”

Mia bites down on her lower lip as Harry drops his shirt on the floor and slides his hands up her legs under her dress. She parts her thighs instinctively and tilts her head back against the ceiling. “Yes. You must.”

He hums, pushing her dress up until she grabs it from him, letting it bunch at her waist. He kisses her hip bone, then her thighs. Slowly, taking his time. He gently bites down on the flesh, growing harder at the sound of her gasp. He presses a feather light kiss to the waistband of her underwear before slowly tugging it down.

“Mia,” he says softly, slotting himself between her legs. “My sweet girl. When did you get so wet?”

She glances down at him. “Um, when you were being super hot and angry at your father in the restaurant.”

“Which was well over an hour ago?”

“Well, I wasn’t going to jump you in the car!”

“I wouldn’t have minded pulling over. Or doing this first.” He emphasizes the word when a careful lick against her. Her hands immediately fly out to grab his curls. “You know I never mind. Now.” He holds her thighs open. “Let me apologize properly.”

His fingers dig into her skin as he slids his tongue over her again. He relaxes into the mattress, encouraged by her strained groans and tight hold on his hair. He knows Mia well. He could do this in his sleep. He knows exactly what types of touches she likes, when she likes it rough, or when she prefers to be teased. He could stay here between her legs for hours, days even, submitting to her in whichever way she pleases. His heart thunders in his chest at the promise of forever. He’ll have her like this, exposed, and he’ll be at her mercy. All that she’s done for him, all that she’s tolerated. How much she’s fixed him. If only he could repay her.

“So good,” she whimpers under him, raising his hips against his mouth to create more friction. He focuses his attention on her clit and then slowly presses two fingers into her, listening to her gasp at the penetration. “I love you. Oh I love you. I love you. I love you-”

All the discomfort he’s felt today is suddenly gone. All he’s aware of is Mia. He’s wrapped up in her. He’s all hers. Hasn’t he always been? He closes his eyes and loses himself in the sounds she’s making, her heavy breathing, and the taste of her on his tongue. He’s never had any issue in losing himself in Mia.

It’s just him and her. 

He couldn’t be more happy.

[yeetmeoffjueyunkarst]

Since it’s Eula’s birthday how about soft moments with her?

!!! You're absolutely right! @definitelynotaneulasimp whenever someone mentions her i think of you lmfao. Also I have a soft spot for girls who are tsundere or kuudere I realise XD

Eula x gn! Reader, sfw fluff

With that, happy birthday, Eula!

All hail the KoF's Reconnaissance Captain, Eula!

We all definitely know that Eula's passion does lie in dancing, so why not watch as she dances away, far far away from the City of Wind and Freedom, as the evening sun shines so beautifully on her? Remember to give her your best compliments, for she deserves nothing less <3

JUST DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY

And... if she insists that you two have a dance together, just let her take the lead. She'll probably call you out for vengeance if you reject her, but let's be honest. She just wants to hold you close as you both sway by the shore.

Eula is also a very good chef (one of the few good things that her old aristocratic family taught her) so you are VERY VERY lucky to be enjoy her own personal cooking, especially her ever famous Stormcrest Pie, which is literally leagues better than the rations in her Recon Company alone.

I'm sorry, but I don't think you can ever eat anything else other than her food again. Looks like Eula has captured you through the way of the stomach <3

I do think that she would be rather possessive and protective of you because. You're linked to her. And she doesn't want the townspeople to hurt you just based on the fact you're dating her. Expect her to treat you like you're a very precious treasure to her.

Even though the situation improves thanks to Eula's own efforts in her job, as well as Amber, you, and all her fellow coworkers efforts to change the people's impression of her, she still views you as someone very important to her.

You are one of the first few who stood by her side, and have her seen her beyond her facade after all. Not as Eula Lawrence. Just Eula.

Ever since you two started dating, her work efficiency has risen by 200%. Her Company knows that it's because their superior has someone she loves and wants to get back to you ASAP, since her job requires her to patrol outside Mondstadt City for days, sometimes weeks.

Likes being the small spoon so that she can feel small and protected. Definitely adores being able to hide her face into the crook of your neck.

But also likes being the big spoon and holding you close, like how a child would hug their favourite soft toy. Except that you're her favourite person in the entire world and she definitely doesn't want to let you go.

She really adores cuddling with you. You're so warm and nice and sweet, how could she not?

Making little flower crowns for the both of you when you're both hanging out on dates... watch her face blush as you place one on her head and she says she 'exact vengeance'. Done by making another flower crown and placing it on your head in return

Bringing her home after she drinks a little too much, taking care of her in her hangovers as she probably lets loose a little. Cleaning her up as well and taking care of her too.

Or her enlisting Amber to help her buy groceries while she takes care of you when you are sick because people just look at Amber and go oh adorable child here take all my wares while Eula gets cold treatment (pun intended)

Will pull out all the shots for you when you're unwell. More worried, less snarky Eula appears as well.

Oh, Eula.... so wonderfully tsundere and adorable I like her very much <333

[feralchaton]

I am a private person. I also believe that joy, like misery, loves company but it definitely throws better parties. Along with keeping much of me and mine to myself; I usually don't 'allow' myself to get excited. But. I am over the moon, bouncing off the walls, can barely contain myself excited/ happy/ elated at finally having our wedding.

The cute part of the story is that this was originally planned for 2015. The date would have been 11/11/15. In previous years, I was told that pregnancy would be next to impossible for me, and I was okay with that. Our son's birthday is about a week after that date. I'm more thankful for him. I also appreciate how, over that time, our guest list has gone from close to 250 to less than 10. Happily so, no fuss, just us.

I'm finally (officially) marrying my best friend!!! The one who let me know love at first sight is not only possible but very real. The one who taught & showed me what unconditional means and stood, stands, beside me as I consciously separate and navigate from all things conditional and toxic.

The trials and tribulations have been many, and we grew closer and stronger together not only through difficult times but the many good and great ones, too.

We see each other, meet each other where we are, and choose each other while choosing to keep going and keep growing. We are partners in every sense and yet wonderfully individual and separate, still finding ways to surprise one another. We do not tolerate each other's differences; we celebrate them. We don't hide our anger or misgivings; we talk and work through things together. We match, fit, and click in close to every way possible.

I can't imagine what has been close to the equivalent of half my lifetime spent with him any other way. Many remark on how lucky he is, but it takes two, and he helps me feel like a four leaf clover dancing on a rainbow each and every day.

"Monday for health, Tuesday for wealth, Wednesday best of all, Thursday for losses, Friday for crosses, Saturday, no luck at all"

Tying the knot (literally) 🍾🥂💐✨️🫶🏼💖🤭🥳💌

[isa-ghost]

Isa my darling! Happy Birthday, albeit a couple of days early.

Seeing you screech in Philza's streams because Apollo hit you with that dodgeball yet again makes me giggle a lot.

How about since headcanon's for qPhilza's past/pre island relationship with qFit. How they got to know each other, and how quickly they became friends?

Idr if I said this on Tumblr yet but deadass I asked Apollo on my pendulum if qPhil is his blorbo and he said yes. He's been as invested in shit as me and it's been hilarious. I literally have crows yelling at me irl to keep writing rn but I'm answering headcanons first.

The entire time I've been distracted between writing these, crows have been yelling at me about it. Which. Is how Apollo communicates with me when I'm not actively talking to him through readings LMFAO.

Also thank you for the birthday wish :D [desperately hoping nothing else horrible happens this weekend please god]

Anyway qPhil headcanons masterlist let's go

Disclaimer that I didn't know of Fit before QSMP (I've only been in mcyt for 4 years monkaS) so these are gonna be largely pulled out of my ass and a lil repetitive.

These two both have experiences in anarchy and war, they've definitely brushed shoulders a couple times bc of it

They admired each other's work ofc. Phil is a macro scale kinda guy, total annihilation and victory that makes a statement. Fit's more of a micro scale kinda guy, zeroing in on one person or group individually and making their lives hell until the end in the name of surviving a little longer

On that note, I think we all sleep a little bit on the fact that Fit is Also a survivalist like Phil, just in a very different set of high stakes conditions. These two are equally skilled in it and equally sharp strategists

On that note, anyone who knew them from the past would fear the idea of them coming together to create a plan of any kind, especially of the anarchist-fueled variety. If the Federation has done their research right, they should know full well how terrifying this duo could be in an effort to dismantle their authority

Btw by brushing shoulders I don't just mean brief passings by, I mean they've like. Camped out for a night together, temporarily truced for the sake of safety in numbers, etc. More than a few conversations have been had even if the time they've spent together totals to less than a week.

However, even when they weren't actively paired together, they'd still occasionally trade or gift each other surplus resources. It was a genuine kind act, even if it simultaneously served as a reason for each of them to not come after the other. I scratch your back, you scratch mine.

Like why do you think Fit was one of the first threats on Phil's mind in Purgatory. He Knew(tm). And he knew Fit has an affinity for picking off the weak first, like a lion after a herd of antelope. To him, Purgatory was the awakening of a monster who'd been dormant for a long time.

See, present day they're QPR as fuck, they'd never do this now without 10x the pressure Purgatory put on them, but back in the day they took close notes on each other's strengths and weaknesses. Just In Case, yknow? They could very much kill each other. Back in the day they would've if it came to it, no matter how good an ally they were.

Something about how these two used to be so cold and hard to the world. Be it to self-preserve or some other reason. Something about how now they've both softened and warmed after becoming parents. They never could've imagined the other would "weaken" like this, especially back then.

Phil 🤝🏻 Fit - Phil being a historian of the deities/builds of his Hardcore World, Fit being a historian of 2B2T

A lot of this boils down to mutual respect, common interests, and secret admiration tbh. And what's more homoerotic than that?

They're both crisis preppers. Not doomsday type shit, just. Being ready for shit to hit the fan. They both come from places where life is significantly more dangerous than it is in other realms.

The crazy thing is though? Despite the above, they can't imagine being from each other's realms. Phil would LOATHE 2B2T and Fit would hate the absoluteness of Hardcore. Isolation is absolute, death is absolute. There's no wiggle room or margin for error.

With how adaptive the two of them are due to their origins, they could probably acclimate to any conditions. They'd complain about having to, especially if it was inconvenient, but they could. They used to swap tips & tricks with each other on how to improve their adaptability too.

Fit would've 100% been down to join Phil on Doomsday in DSMP. He was thoroughly impressed when Phil told him the story.

[bluejaysandblackbats]

Catch and Release

Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam

Summary: AU where Jason doesn't die in the explosion and he and Tim end up attending the same high school months later.

Chapters: 4/?

Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Tim Drake, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon, Sebastian Ives, Jack Drake, Janet Drake

Relationships: TBA

Additional Tag: Jason Todd Lives, Jason Todd-centric, POV Jason Todd, POV First Person, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake is Not Robin, Jason Todd is Not Robin (Anymore), Bruce Wayne Needs a Hug, Alfred Pennyworth is the Best, Alfred Pennyworth Knows, Stalker Tim Drake, Jason Todd Has Chronic Pain, Jason Todd Has PTSD, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unlikely Friends, Injury Recovery, Emotional Baggage, Rage, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Communicating

Chapter Four: Looking Glasses

My glasses weren't ready for my Wednesday appointment, but they were done the Friday after my second week of school. So, I took a cab to the optometrist's and then the pizza parlor, where I ran into Tim. He was with his friends, so I thought he wouldn't notice me. "One meat lover's pizza with thin garlic butter crust," I ordered. I waited in the corner, drinking out of the two-liter soda I bought to drown my misery. I had a crappy week at school and didn't want to speak to talk to anyone. The smell of pizza usually left me in a better mood. Besides, I liked being away from the house and the family. I ate the fries they gave me for dining in and watched people standing at the street corner.

"Order for Christopher!" the man at the counter called. I finished my fries, threw the two-liter in my bag, and grabbed my crutches. When I got to the counter, I realized I couldn't carry my pizza and use my crutches. Tim got up and offered to help. I was mortified. I hid my name and everything to avoid speaking to him, only to need his help.

"Here, listen, my driver's on his way. He can drop you off if you want, and I'll help you to your-."

"I don't wanna be any trouble," I interrupted. I said it harshly without meaning to, but I don't think Tim cared. He'd been following me around campus all day, and we just so happened to meet at the pizza place. It would've felt like he was stalking me had he not gotten there first. "I should've thought-."

"No, it's okay. It's really no trouble. I insist," Tim replied.

There was no polite way to turn him down, and his driver just pulled up out front. "I'll split this pie with you if you don't take me home."

Tim grinned a half-smile. "Alright. Come on, I've got your pizza," Tim reassured me. He carried my pizza to the car, and I followed him out.

Once we got in the car, I asked the question I'd had since the first day of school. "Are you watching me? At school, I mean?" I asked.

"I've been-. I'm curious. People talk, and-. Well, you never let anybody close enough to learn anything about you," Tim replied. I knit my brows with great effort.

"What do you wanna know, Tim?" I asked.

"Jason, what kind of accident was it?" Tim questioned.

"Explosion... Gas leak explosion. I don't like to talk about it," I lied. Honestly, I was dying to talk about it. I was sick of holding it all inside myself, but I couldn't afford to let anyone in my head. Especially not some freshman I'd known for less than a week. Tim gave me my pizza box and the okay to eat in the car. I set the box between us and draped an open napkin over my lap. I let Tim eat, but he wasn't hungry. I ate in silence.

It'd been a while since I'd had pizza. I think it was my birthday the last time. I was in the hospital then. Bruce wanted to cheer me up, but all I could think about was my-. I could only think about Sheila. I tried to take the brunt of the blast, but I wasn't big enough. She impaled her skull on a rock anyway. So, I lay trapped between the debris and her lifeless body for what felt like forever. I relived that moment constantly. Lately, I only think about it when I feel trapped. "Jason?" Tim whispered as he touched my arm. It shook me out of a trance. "You alright? You were gone for a while... We're at my house now."

"Oh, we're here?" I mumbled as if I'd been asleep. I slipped my backpack on, and Tim helped me carry my pizza box inside. His house was mostly empty, save for a maid or nanny working on the premises. He set the box on the coffee table and turned the tv on.

I took my homework out of my bag and sat it upright on the floor. "You're gonna do your homework?" Tim asked. I nodded and put on my glasses.

"Yeah, that's what I typically do when I get a minute to sit down," I half-joked. Tim shrugged and flipped through the channels.

"Would it be distracting if I asked you a few questions?" Tim asked. I shook my head. "Jason, when you were thirteen, you went on a short trip to Hollywood over the spring break, right?" The question was weird, but I nodded.

"Yeah, I was visiting a friend. He invited me out to see the movie his Aunt worked on," I answered. That was a half-truth.

"Did you get to see Robin while you were there?" Tim asked.

I laughed it off. "Robin lived in Gotham... But no one's seen much of him lately," I replied. Tim nodded seriously and turned toward the tv.

"He was in Los Angeles that week," Tim replied, "Weird coincidence, huh?"

"What are you getting at, Tim?" I asked.

"Nothing, I'm just a big fan of Robin. I always ask," Tim whispered. I took a deep breath. "I'm coming on too strong, huh?

"A little," I replied as I opened my history book and filled out my worksheet. It took me an hour to finish my homework before I asked Tim to call me a cab.

Tim seemed sad at first, but he called the cab anyway. When the cab got there, he lingered out front with me. "Hey, um-."

"Thanks for everything, Tim. Can we do this again?" I asked. Tim grinned. I didn't want to admit it, but it was the first time I'd felt normal since the accident. I didn't want to let that feeling go. I opened the door and waved at Tim before heading home.

As soon as I got home, Bruce came out of the manor fuming. He waited until I reached the front door to start in on me. "Where the hell have you been?" Bruce asked, whispering through clenched teeth.

"I got my glasses, ate, and did my homework... How are you?" I asked.

"I was worried-. Did you ask me how I was?" Bruce questioned. I nodded. I never asked him how he was. I think my sincerity shocked him. I offered an awkward smile. "I'm alright... How are you?"

"I'm good... I think-. Yeah, I'm good," I smiled. Bruce let me in, and I took the stairlift without argument. I didn't even have to argue with him. I chose peace and peace felt... Kinda nice.

[sleepingghostt]

Wip ( fuck you Wednesday)

Anniversary

-

“Trust me, you’re gonna love it.”

“Trust me, I won’t.”

He probably would though. Daiki always loved when Taiga surprised him because he always gave him what he wanted. Whether it be five hours of non stop sex, a new Mai-Chain magazine or a pair of new Jordan’s for his ever growing collection. It was one of the things Daiki curled into instantly during their relationship. Taiga spoiling the fuck out of him just because he wanted to.

Now in hindsight, it was their anniversary and Daiki usually didn’t give two fucks about things like this. Until he and Taiga got together. Then, only then did it become a little less shitty. However, on this day in particular, Daiki was in a shitty mood. Shitty enough to say fuck off to fancy restaurant dinners and movie dates.

He just wanted to celebrate at home this time, wrapped up in one of the biggest, coziest blankets he could find and watch a movie with Taiga, maybe play a round of Mario kart and finish off the evening with a couple rounds of hot sex before bed. He had even suggested the idea to Taiga after the redhead literally asked for his opinion during a night of pillow talk a week ago.

So why were they here?

“This is bullshit.” Leaning back in the passenger seat of their jeep wrangler, a gift from Taiga’s father for the redhead’s twenty-first birthday, he put his feet up on the dash and glared out the window, the bustling streets of Los Angeles, a fadeaway as they zoomed down a winding road, sandwiched between tall palms and bendy trees.

He would’ve crossed his arms but one of them was broken. Yeah, broken. Apparently, he wasn’t as invincible as basketball proved him to believe.

“Why can’t we just eat at home like normal people?”

Taiga chuckled - damn him and his low, husky laugh - and shook his head, his bangs swishing in his eyes, that hot careless look accenting well with the light stubble on his jaw.

It was perfect scenarios like these where Daiki really couldn’t take his eyes off him. At first it was a jealous thing, like who the fuck gave him the right to look hotter than me? The only one who can look hotter than me is me.

But now it was a comfort, a little thought in the back of his head when Taiga managed to surpass all limits of humanity and become an actual fucking god, one that cuddled Daiki close at night and kissed him awake in the morning with a hot cup of tea and a nagging complaint about his dirty clothes on the floor, tan chiseled abs catching the eyes of the sun, peeking through the bedroom window.

That…I’m dating that. And he loves me…

“Have you looked in the mirror lately? We’re not normal people, Dai.”

“So? We’re not weirdos either and last time I checked, you work at a fucking restaurant on weeknights. You can cook. You could’ve made us something.”

“Who says I didn’t this time?” He threw a little smirk Daiki’s way and no matter how long they’d been dating, his throat still went dry and his legs felt weak even though he was sitting down. Damn you fucking asshole.

“Tch. I don’t see a stove. Our table. If you have food shoved up your ass, pull it out and show me because this,” he gestured around the car with an aggressive flick of his hand. “Doesn’t look like what we agreed on.”

“Oi, calm down.” Keeping his eyes on the road, Taiga grabbed Daiki's good hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it gently. The action relaxed the bluenette and he sighed, slumping back in his seat.

“First of all, we agreed on jack shit.”

“No we fucking didn’t-“

“And second,” he breathed, giving Daiki’s hand one last kiss before lowering their arms to rest against the center console, his thumb rubbing circles into the dark skin. His tone grew softer. “I know how tough these past couple weeks have been for you. Breaking your arm sucks, especially with basketball and you haven’t been out of the apartment since you broke it.”

Daiki opened his mouth to point out college but of course Taiga beat him to it.

“That’s not true. I still go to my-“

“Classes. Yeah I know. But that’s it. You gotta get out more, baby. Being home all the time isn’t healthy for you.”

You’re one to talk. That’s what Daiki wanted to say but he couldn’t. Taiga was rarely home these days. When he wasn’t at school, daydreaming about Daiki, (‘cause seriously, what else could he possibly be doing?) He was at work or at practice. And Daiki’s schedule was no different, (minus the job part obviously.)

Basketball and Taiga were a middle ground. But thanks to his broken arm, the first one was on standby. He hadn’t held a basketball in weeks and because Taiga was barely home…well, Daiki had been closer to having a mental breakdown in the last few weeks than he was closer to getting his dick sucked every night which was saying something because five out of the seven days, both boys basically radiated sex.

God, and it wasn’t even the end of the semester.

“Daiki?”

“What?”

Daiki snapped out of his thoughts and looked sideways at Taiga. There was a knowing look in the redhead’s eyes, sad in the way he sighed and smiled at Daiki, like if he tried hard enough, he could lift all the weight from the bluenette’s shoulders and bare them on his own.

“Breathe okay? It’s just us tonight. Nothing else matters.”

Daiki complied with a grumble, feeling his lungs deflate like balloons, the weight in his chest becoming lighter, more easy to push aside like a small heap of clean jerseys that didn’t mean shit till the next game.

The hand holding his, gave a reassuring squeeze and he squeezed back, fully aware of Taiga’s stare on his face, switching back and forth between him and the road.

“I’ve got us, babe,” he mumbled. “Just relax and trust me. That’s all you need to do, okay?”

The only thing Daiki could do was nod and look out the window again.

How could he not when the redhead got like this? It was one of the things Daiki loved about him. Whatever he lacked, Taiga supplied tenfold. And vice versa.

“We’re almost there. I swear to god, you’re gonna love it.”

—

“I hate it.”

“Bullshit,” rolling his eyes, Taiga turned off the car and unbuckled his seat belt, his muscles flexing under his thin white tee. “You haven’t even lifted your dirty ass feet off my dashboard.”

“Our dashboard,” Daiki hummed under his breath. “And mine aren’t dirty. Have you seen your soles after practice? I swear they’re dirtier than Nigou-”

“Just get out of the damn car!”

“Tch. Dirty ass bastard.”

Refusing to move, Daiki crossed his arms as best he could with his stupid cast and glared through the windshield at a hill of sand. God he hated the ocean. “Take me home Taiga.”

“No.”

Flashing him a sly grin, Taiga hopped out of the Jeep and Daiki considered locking the doors. He really did.

“Come on,” opening Daiki’s door, Taiga held his hand out and Daiki swatted it away with a pout, hopping out himself.

“This is lame. I don’t wanna go for a walk on the beach right now.” Grumbling, he glared as Taiga kneeled down on the pavement of the empty parking lot and untied Daiki’s shoes, holding them steady as the bluenette carefully stepped out of them.

“We’re not doing that.”

“Well you’re out of luck if you’re planning on swimming. I can’t get my cast wet and the water’s gotta be freezing so I’m not putting my feet in.”

“Seriously, shut up for two seconds. What did I say about trusting me?”

Daiki sneered at him before reluctantly backing down, carelessly running a hand through his hair.

“Whatever. Let’s just get on with it.”

He grabbed the redhead’s hand as Taiga straightened and let himself be pulled gently to the sand, leaving their shoes in the Jeep.

The sand was cold as it crunched beneath Daiki’s feet, filling the spaces between his toes. It felt nice. The cool breeze felt nice. The distant crashing of ever growing waves felt calming. Daiki allowed himself to breathe again, almost stumbling over uneven bumps of sand.

“Easy, D.” Like always, Taiga was there to steady him, a large hand latching onto his waist, pulling him tight and secure into his firm side.

“Don’t want you breaking the other arm.”

“We’re on sand dumbass,”

Taiga scoffed and lightly pinched his hip. “Says the one who broke said arm getting a fucking banana milk out of the vending machine.”

Daiki opened his mouth then closed it again, blushing harshly. It happened, it hurt and he didn’t want to talk about it again. Ever. Case closed.

Reading his expression, Taiga cleared his throat and chuckled sheepishly. “Ah, too soon?”

“You think?”

“Sorry.”

Honestly Daiki couldn’t decide which was worse: physically breaking his arm getting a banana milk out of the vending machine or having to walk around with a cast that read, property of Kagami Taiga in black sharpie letters.

“I’m just glad it wasn’t your leg.”

“That’s stupid. How could my leg fit inside a vending machine?”

“The same way your arm did, dumbass,” Taiga sighed and gently thumped Daiki’s forehead, his fingertips sliding down to cup his cheek and turn his face towards him. “I’m serious Daiki. Be more careful next time. You really scared me.”

“Yeah…sure. Whatever, but…”

Staring ahead, the words died in Daiki’s throat, his hand tightening around Taiga’s.

Up ahead, spread out on the sand was a large picnic blanket, covered in a neat spread of plates, champagne glasses, two large baskets of food and two candles.

“I…T-Taiga?”

Unable to find the right words for the large amount of shock waves in his system, he just stared, his hand going slack in Taiga’s, dropping and thumping against his side. Slack jawed, he glanced at his boyfriend who chuckled.

“You like it?”

[theprinceofnothingatall]

October 9, 2024.

I just want to cry. It was not on the agenda today to come home and immediately binge eat. I ate my grapes like I was supposed to and then a mouthful of cheese, then raw bacon. Yes raw. It’s called a disorder for a reason. I cooked old left over onion and pepper with 6 eggs and downed applejuice.

My boyfriend called in the middle of it so I was annoyed waiting til he shut up so I could go finish. I love him but in that ritual type moment I was just eager to get it over with.

I do like that when talking about con and food, he corrected himself to “ when I’m eating dinner” instead of ‘were’ and it made me a little happy. It’s him telling me in his own way that he won’t make me eat. I should really take the fucking opportunity. Im scared when I get out of the bath/shower I’m finally taking after work that I’ll eat the one spicy ramen I have or lettuce or whatever. I’m scared. I’m scared. I’m scared. But not scared enough not to do it. Scared I’ll purge again after when my throat hurts so much. The way my body feels is mortifying. I know there’s no change and I’ve grown chubby and squish because I just ate and ate for so long through the months without purging. I haven’t “ properly” liquid fasted in over 3 months now. I wrote out my limits til early December. Messing up the literal second day and the third just makes me want to throw it away because it feels ruined. I don’t feel like I deserve to eat on sat for my birthday.

Saturday is my fucking birthday. Another age, not at my UGW… it’s shameful how I’ve been 115-125 the past two fucking years now. I don’t want this? Then I have to fucking work for it. I know that. It means coming home and taking a shower. It means waiting to eat til 7 pm everynight that’s not an event day because otherwise I know I’ll binge. It’s have tea or coffee and going over these limits I wrote that are hard to fucking do when you haven’t been fasting regularly. I mean, I set myself up for failure with 111 for today. Allow it to go below 400 if it’s written and if I actually make it… I check off toward something.. but 400 or less is still better than the regular it has been of 1’600-2’400. No wonder I’ve been gaining you know? My tdee is 1891 to even lose .5 a week. So my event days I set for 1900 for now and in December for con my limits those days are 1300 because by then I won’t want to go over that… what could I be? What the fuck could I be? Let’s assume I’m still 112.6 under bloat.

27 days.

27 days to tone my body, lose weight and gain confidence.

The guy I’m cosplaying for con is like super fucking lanky and a grim reaper, for death’s sake am I going to look the part without having to fucking contour my face like a fat liar.

When I’m in my suit, I refuse to not look anything less than model material. I’ll lose this pathetic weight in all the right places. Let’s average all my calories limits out to about 800. In 27 days, what is that?

-9.6 (103.0)

Good, but not good enough. That’s what I was with my ex before I gained… let’s say it’s actually an average of 600 since on my event days I won’t even make it up close to 1’900 and I’ll have those 50 cal days sprinkling in November:

- 11.1 ( 101.5)

My first low weight when I was 17-18 was 101.2; it would be nostalgic.

But what if… I tried to average my days to 400 or lower even on the days my intake it set for higher, only going over the event days and even then… not even to 1000 and say my average because of the low ones I’ll be able to achieve, 400:

- 12.7 ( 99.9)

Well of course I love that. We all love and glorify the idea of breaking into the double digits.

Sure I’ll eat tonight. I’ll have spicy ramen for comfort of pain and the assurance of speeding my fucked up metabolism. I’ll eat what’s left of that salad.

The rest of the 27 days, I stay under my limits because I won’t fucking binge, I won’t fucking eat at all until 7 pm on a regular day. 4 weeks I’ll drop this weight. 4 weeks. The goal is to be 99-103 by con.

Realistically I say that, knowing damn well if I’m not 99.9 or lower, I’ll be upset with myself. so REALLY the gw for con is 97-99.9*

“It’s not hell if you like how it burns.”

[lurkiestvoid]

Having a lot of mixed feelings so personal rant time for a bit.

My 'second mom' (stepmom) is getting older and very disabled. She's not ready to give up her independence just yet, but she has no one that is both 1) close enough and 2) able to care for her, but sometime within the next year or two she's going to start needing round-the-clock care.

She's already run it by her son and my brother and they're cool with this idea, so she's offered that, when she does need the care, we could move in with her so I could be her caregiver and in return she'd leave us her house.

It's going to be an ongoing discussion and we haven't agreed yet, but both of us would feel much better to not have her be alone all the time, and we'll literally never afford to buy a house otherwise. There are LOTS of details and pros/cons to consider and no decision has been reached, but that's the context.

I found out today that there is a Medicaid program that will pay wages to a disabled and/or elderly patient's caregiver of choice (friend, family, etc) and while that's amazing and definitely goes straight to the top of the "pro" column, I am fucking angry I didn't know about it before now.

It would have literally saved my mom's life. Full stop.

In 2019 my mom went to the beach and came back with what she thought was a "bug bite" on her calf. Over the next year, it itched and grew and rotted until she was in excruciating pain. She lost her job over it. Doctors prescribed all sorts of antibiotics and nothing worked. A few weeks before she died, in April 2019, she asked me to take her to the ER -- a very rare admission of pain from her -- and the ER docs shrugged. They referred her to a wound care clinic.

I didn't know this at the time, but she had her sister take her to that appointment (aunt stayed in the car) and came out crying, had aunt take her home. Later we found out they gave her only two options: either $200/wk for gauze and supplies mailed to her home, or amputation of the leg. Pay more than her rent for maintenance, or lose any chance of supporting herself.

So she went home and died. She kept it quiet so no one would worry. She wrote a goodbye letter. Less than two weeks later her body gave out and succumbed to infection, a month before her 50th birthday. We found her days after. It was ... bad.

If we had known this was an option, it would have been a major factor in considering her future quality of life. I could have taken care of her, could have afforded to do so -- we've always been in poverty and she didn't want to be a burden, but this option would have turned it from "burden" to "favor" in her mind, would have made it so that she wouldn't have had to be alone, wouldn't have had to worry about rent, wouldn't have had to worry about caring for herself as a middle-aged fresh amputee living alone.

Regardless, I'm glad to know this option exists now at least, so I can maybe help care for the one parental figure I have left and not have to repeat the "finding your loved one long-dead" scenario.

But goddammit mom should still be alive and this might have saved her. It makes it fresh all over again.

[girltomboy]

My birthday weekend was so wonderful. My boyfriend and I attended the graduation ceremony for his class, he chose to not participate because he thought, since he didn't pass the year, he technically did not graduate. But we didn't know he *could* have participated, and they called his name but he was not there on the stage. And he tried to play it cool but I could tell he was a little bit hurt by it. He said it's meaningless anyway, since it's only symbolic and doesn't actually count as anything. I was frustrated that he wouldn't even go get his graduation diploma, but he insisted it's nothing so we forgot about it.

Near midnight he paused what we were watching and ran to the store to buy me a small cake and stuck a lit joint in it to wish me a happy birthday 😭 it was so cute I was sure I would cry but I didn't because I was happy in a cheerful way, not an emotionally raw way. And it was just funny. And he got me the pig plushie that I had seen in a thrift store window two days in a row. I literally wanted to go buy it myself but the store closes before I finish work. And on the day before my birthday when we walked by that store again, the plushie was not there anymore, and I wanted to point it out to him but I didn't (I regret not doing it now because I keep imagining what his reaction would have been!). And he also got me space erasers and a sweet card with a wooden whale on it. He only wrote "happy birthday, I love you" on it and apologized for not writing something more. I kind of expected to read more than that but I'm grateful for everything he did for me to have a nice birthday. He made me a delicious breakfast and then we went out and had taco bell and ice cream by the lake. And the next day my bestfriend came to the city with her boyfriend for some uni-related errands, and she gave me a lovely gift and introduced me to her bf. He is a guy she had been talking to for YEARS, he was texting her from Germany when we were in uni, and they were just friends talking about stuff. I remember how she used to tell me she thought about what if they were together, but she said she would not consider it because he's younger (and shorter). Really mind-blowing story they have. But they look cute together, and he's a Gemini like her. She told me about her job, and that she might come to the beach with us, which got me extremely hype and excited!! She got me a heat changing mug, some spring charms, and a colorful turtle bracelet that I never want to take off.

After that my bf left to his parents' house for the summer, and since then my week has been mostly empty, and so so so so sleepy. I had such a hard time waking up and staying focused at work the whole week. And it felt weird not looking forward to meeting and hanging out with my bf after work. I've just been napping and using my phone way too much. We video call but it's not the same, I like it way less now that I've had a taste of being with him physically everyday. Even though we spent the whole first 2 ish years of our relationship on video calls. But at least we spend time on discord with our other friends too, I'd been missing them and gaming together.

I only slept 5 hours last night and today I kind of want to go buy another box dye, a lighter shade this time. Last week I dyed my hair some kind of blonde, but it looks too warm for me, and my bf said it looks darker 💀 somehow. So I want to get that, some shaving foam, and body lotion. Also kitchen sponges, eggs, bread, some yogurt, parsley, and some razors. I plan on resuming my yoga routine (I've been perpetually exhausted and haven't done it in 4 days), using some hot cream for my back because it's been bothering me a bit, dye my hair + shower, and give myself a lotion massage. I've been watching OITNB and I forgot how emotional this show used to make me.

[im-not-joseph]

01-16-23

Dear Joseph,

I know that you are just another character that I created in my mind in 2014 as an effort to live out a fantasy life where everything just seemed to go right, but sometimes I feel like you are the only person that I can tell these things to. So I am going to do just that, in a place where nobody that I know will ever be able to follow along.

I lost my mentor on my birthday last year.

He had the same first name as you did, which only adds to the confusion in my mind. On the note of additions, to add to the pain, over the day of and three days to follow I only got to see the love of my life once for about 5 minutes after figuring out how absolutely fucked the send off to 2022 was going to be. To this day I don’t really know how I am supposed to feel about this and the circumstances leading up to it. I can only dread the next one when I know this pain will just come back in full force.

I don’t know what I am supposed to feel anymore, or if I am even allowed to feel anything. Everything seems to have spiraled out of control last year.

To start the year off, my career in tech decided to stagnate and then fall into a nose dive, so I made a conscious decision and moved 800 fucking miles across the country to accept a job closer to my significant other. We had talked about everything a pair of hopeless romantics would. I suppose that is another relationship that I just decided to fuck up by doing whatever I wanted to and going into a career that they simply couldn’t handle the schedule of. All cleverly disguised by a visual hatred for the profession as a whole.

I started off my dream career and made whole lot of close and trusted friends along the way, including a new love that I will surely talk about near constantly in these letters. I spend my days thinking of ways to advance my career, ways that I can positively impact this community and those around it, and opportunities that have opened up because of this life change. I feel more connected to people than I ever have, but it had the nasty side effect of opening up a couple of old wounds. Two people that I never wanted to see again live less than two hours from me and are painfully aware of my existence and location.

The year wasn’t all bad though. I found someone that I feel like I truly connect with, but at the same time feel like they could just as easily live their life without me in it. I am pretty sure that I am going to marry this woman and want nothing more than a life with her. I want nothing more than to wake up every morning to her beautiful blue eyes and find myself showing my true self and colors around her knowing the the joy that it brings me to hear her laugh at my quirks and the stupid shit that I say. I am also learning how impossible that I am to love because of this. I know that she doesn’t want kids, despite me wanting them. I know that she doesn’t feel any difference waking up beside me and after nearly a year has only been willing to sleep beside me a single time. I am positive in the absolute that she doesn’t find me sexually attractive at all and have come to terms with that, only realizing this morning that being called a “handsome and sexy man” by a friend of mine literally caused me to break down and cry on a phone call with them at 5 in the fucking morning because I have truly started to believe that I am some disgusting monster that nobody can find attractive anymore. The only thing that I used to want in life, sharing my last name with someone, is also something that she has no desire to do. I keep telling myself that I am okay with that, only to break down from stress and be reminded of it in the most painful fucking ways possible at least once a week now.

Joseph, I don’t know what will happen this year. I am sure there will be times when I laugh, there will be times when I cry, and there may even be my final moment before I die. But I will try and write you every couple of days to let you know.

[tiredcommunisstt]

at this point i NEED a therapist

But therapy would trigger me

Also got kicked out at 18 by my parents for the following: drug use, rebelling against them,

Not taking my medication

Dropping out of highschool

Refusing to go to church with them or eat dinner with them(thanks mom for the eating disorder that was so bad that I refused to eat dinner because I was usually scared I had already eaten to many calories anyway by eating at school or work or what not and it had gotten so bad over the years that I was basically convinced eating after 6,7,8 would cause immediate weight gain… was to the point that I was body checking so often I noticed (u know, evening bloat, morning skinny) somehow I had correlated that to literally eating food throughout the day was causing me to visibly gain weight. Thank u for creating a world where I was so closed off that I wasn’t talking about this to a soul, that I was too young and inexperienced with life to know that I had a nice body just probably could have dressed better but anyways thanks mom)

I’ll never forget the day I got kicked out. it was around the end of November. actually I had been given a second chance. I had turned 18 that year, a month later, no longer enrolled in school, my graduation was supposed to be that summer,

They handed me a card at dinner in my 18th birthday and it had 50 dollars and they told me they were giving me a month. a formal eviction notice or some bullshit. no car or license(they didn’t trust me to drive I guess when I was 16 so they never helped me or pushed me in that direction and almost used it to try to hurt me BEFORE I was even 16 they always said I wouldn’t be getting my license and bla bla, it hurt and I tuned it out. Decided. Fuck them. I didn’t care anyways so yeah I didn’t have my license, didn’t have any savings(wtf I was literally freshly 18 even tho I did start working right after I was 16 because they made me buy all my own stuff) anyways I tried to kill myself like maybe less than two weeks later. They told U OF M hospital that made me stay or whatever that they thought it was for attention bla bla. diagnosed with bipolar i think that visit. saw trump win the 2016 election while I was in my stay. (doctors took my side and pretty much shamed my parents and I won’t forget that either. The only nice part of a horrible situation. I’ve never forgotten ppl who stand up for me. random strangers. ofc I had already told them why I was there and how stressed and upset and hopeless I was.

My parents gave me a second chance

said I could live there with stipulations

Or whatever

had a job, not going to school( pay rent)

That was fine

curfew 11 pm

That was fine

Taking prescribed medications

That was doable

outpatient recommended therapy

2 times rescheduled

The day my mom like went to take me the third time she made me change my coat as wE were getting in the car becaus it smelled like cigarettes

Me not wanting to change because I had severe body dysmorphia and wasn’t even comfortable going and the only thing I felt comfortable in was my big ass winter coat she got me from Costco that covered my whole body and my stomach that I thought was so bloated. i got out of the car and like kinda threw a tantrum and stormed down the road and she said

“If u don’t go to this appointment you can find a new place to live”

And I kept walking down the street

And when I walked to the front door after the adrenaline had settled she said

they were gonna change the locks and my stuff would be packed up and put in the garage

I’ve never spent the night in that house since

And also I hate them

it broke me

i hate everyone and this stupid Fucking life I have to suffer every waking moment thru.

merry fucking Christmas

[poisonousquinzel]

Hey y'all, I really hate to be making a post like this, but in true 2020 2.0 fashion, life has been... rough.

I've been trying to get a job in my city since May, but I've been denied because of my health issues.

We also don't have a car. And our town is small so while we technically have a bus, it comes by near my house once per day and isn't reliable.

My mom can't work and my step dad's online work has been stretched dry recently so he's been making bare minimum for months.

I had been under the impression in the beginning of May that I would have the assistance of my parents in this, I've never done most of this before and they made it sound like my mom would help me.

However that wasn't really the case, personal stuff happened for them and I don't necessarily blame them for that, but then in June I got denied for a job because "I have too many health issues" and my step dad told me that we'd get back to it after my birthday. (Post 12th)

I've asked my step dad every morning when I wake up what we're going to do that day, because he had said he was going to be the one handling the job stuff when we started again.

And every day we've done whatever it is he said. We walked up to 7-11, turned in an application, looked up online jobs, etc.

We did the same on Wednesday and the only reason I didn't keep looking into more of them that afternoon was because I had a migraine. And when I have migraines they're not just headaches and they're not just migraines.

It's something I've been working through with my doctor about, because my previous long term doctor since childhood was completely incompetent at her job.

When I get migraines, it makes me nauseous. And being nauseated makes my heart slow down and I faint or collapse.

I can't sleep, it hurts to close my eyes or move them behind my eyelids. It feels like it's sparking against metal with every movement.

I've had to go to the hospital for it in the past when I collapsed into a pile of bags and was barely breathing, my previous doctor just... didn't look at the hospital's report on my visit. Like when I tell you in hindsight she really sucked, she really fucking sucked.

So, yeah, I slept a lot on Wednesday. I wasn't thrilled about it either.

And I told my step dad that I'd do all that stuff on Thursday.

My physical state was pretty visibly clear, I couldn't leave my extra darkened room without wearing sunglasses even though it was 8:30 at night.

But, then on Thursday instead I got into a really heated discussion with the two of them.

And... I am just very, very tired now.

I panic called my therapist 5 times in less than 10 minutes afterwards. It was a really bad day.

Thankfully I was able to get back to back emergency appointments with her and my doctor yesterday morning so dw emotionally wise. But I don't know how I'd be fairing if I hadn't been able to get those scheduled.

But Long Story Short:TLDR: we are a couple of weeks away from being on the streets.

Or in a shelter. We wouldn't be able to bring any of our cats. We would lose all of them.

I don't want to beg, but I suppose I am cause I'm terrified

We're behind on bills and next months are just around the corner, we've run out of local resources here that can help. I don't know all of the specifics, but I do know we're out of options.

If you're in a good financial situation and you feel like it, if you can, literally anything would help.

It'd mean the world. I don't want to end up on the streets or in a shelter, and I really don't want to lose my cats.

I can't.

They're the only thing keeping me going, so, please

PayPal •

its.me.ya.frustrated.girl@gmail.com

Cashapp • $Poisonousquinzel

reblogs and signal boosting are also super appreciated!!

[hadesisqueer]

When I was 6 or 7, I met one of my best childhood friends, let's call her V. V and I continued to be attached to the other's hip until I was like 12. Then, we entered ESO, and things changed. We developed different interests. We got other friend groups, and hung out a lot less.

I had another best friend who we're gonna call N. We met when we were like 5, right after she'd moved here from her country, Colombia. We were pretty close and attached to the hip, too. But when we were 12, she had to move back to Colombia. At first, after she left, we chatted every day, but as months passed, we talked less and less.

Okay, V and I became pretty different people as teens. We didn't talk the same way we used to. But we still talked, and liked each other, and loved each other. We still talk. Even now that she lives in a different city due to college, we still chat and ask each other how the other is doing. She tells me how stressed she is about med school, I tell her a bit about my other friends and how I'm struggling with finishing high school (I'm two years behind) and she encourages me. We gossip about our old classmates. During the holidays, when she's here, we hang out. Damn, I turned 20 not long along and like a week after my birthday, when she was here during spring break, we met up and we celebrated it at this pizzeria we loved going when we were younger. And we caught up, and had a fucking blast.

N moved back to Spain two years ago, although to the other side of the country, again, due to college. We don't talk as much, but we're still in contact and care about each other. She was the first person I told I was questioning my sexuality when I was 14, and she supported me. When her brother passed away when we were 16, I was there for her. She still asks me for boy advice like when we were 12 (because she says that even if I'm a lesbian I'm still better with this stuff than her). We gossip about our old classmates as well. She still has some family living here in my town, so she comes here every sixth months or so, and the first thing she does when she knows the exact date is tell me, and we agree to meet up and catch up.

Whenever I meet with her or V, I see how much things has changed between us but still feels the same when we're together. Which is why I found the Amphibia epilogue so relatable.

I understand why some people would be upset that Sasha, Anne and Marcy were different and drifted apart during all those years. But honestly? That's life. They grew up and like Anne said, things change, and that's okay. They're still close enough to know what the others are doing, and to decide to come and surprise Anne for her 23rd birthday. And look at the way Marcy and Sasha interacted, with the same closeness, as if they'd never been apart. Or how Anne literally teared up when she saw them. And that picture at the end of the credits--

Being friends with someone doesn't mean you have to talk to the other every day, and see them all the time. It means you're there for the other when it matters, and realizing that while things may change between you, the bond you have is still the same. And to me, that is much more meaningful that if they'd still been the same for those ten years.

[uraveragelonelysapphic]

When You Wanted to Forget

(Part 2 of “When They Remembered”)

Part 1

Pairing: WandaNat x Reader

Summary: The year after the birthday incident, you had long since forgiven your girlfriends for their mistake. So why were you suddenly becoming so distant?

Warnings: Slight angst? But idk nothing too serious

Word Count: 2.3k

A/N: my first fic in literally forever!!! so sorry for the wait, life has been hectic. I really hope you enjoy this fic!

Y/F/N = Your friend’s name

Y/F/C = Your favorite cake

Y/F/F = Your favorite frosting

*****************************************************************************************************

It was that time of year again. The time of year where you would receive presents and be showered in love and appreciation. The one day of the year was approaching where you were celebrated all day long, every year without fail. Well, except for last year. And that’s what had you so hesitant leading into the week of your birthday.

You had completely forgiven your girlfriends for forgetting your special day last year. They had showered you in apologies and love as soon as they remembered, and that’s what mattered most to you. Sure, it hurt a lot, but at the same time, you knew they didn’t love you any less, they had just genuinely made a mistake. So why were you actively avoiding your girlfriends this week?

That is the mystery that Natasha and Wanda were trying to solve. Now ideally, the two would’ve just been able to sit you down and talk to you about it. But seeing as you could only be found wherever they weren’t, your girlfriends had to figure out another way to find out what had been bothering you.

You got up earlier than both of them (and considering how early Natasha woke up, if it wasn’t concerning that you were always out of bed when even she woke up, it would be impressive), and finally made it back to bed in the late hours of the night, long after both of your girlfriends had already given up on your arrival and gone to bed. You even changed your training schedule so you wouldn’t even be in the gym at the same time as them. It had gotten to the point where your girlfriends yearned for a single glance of you during the day. They wanted more than anything to know what the hell was going on with you.

So, Natasha had gone full blown detective trying to figure out the problem.

She had found three major clues that led her on her journey of unveiling your internal struggle.

First, the particularities of your absence. It had seemed that you weren’t only avoiding your girlfriends, but the entirety of the team. At first, she thought that meant you were isolating yourself; closing yourself off from everyone around you. But after a call from your best friend from home, three days before your birthday, she had second thoughts.

She had just gotten out of the shower, and was walking back into your shared room, where Wanda sat reading a book, when your best friend called.

“Hello?” Natasha asked confusedly after seeing Y/F/N’s name on her screen. Wanda looked up and tilted her head in question, leading to Natasha putting the phone on speaker so the young witch could hear as well.

“Hey, Natasha!” Y/F/N said cheerily.

“Hey, you’re on speaker, and Wanda is in the room with me. What’s up?” Natasha asked.

“Even better! I was hoping to get both of your opinions on what I got for Y/N’s birthday? I’ve been begging her for the past month to tell me what she wants, but her response is always ‘I will love anything you get for me’ or some bullshit along those lines. But I want a genuine opinion to make sure she’ll love what I got her.”

Natasha’s brows furrowed as she took in this information. “Wait, you mean Y/N has actively been talking to you all week?”

Y/F/N laughed. “Uh…duh…she’s my best friend. We literally just got lunch yesterday. Why wouldn’t she talk to me?”

After a moment of awkward silence, Y/F/N spoke up again. “You’re telling me Y/N isn’t talking to you? What did you two do this time?” She spoke in a voice that had now taken on a threatening undertone.

Wanda spoke up this time. “Nothing, at least that we know of. But she’s been distant all week. Not just with Nat and I, but with the entire team. We’ve barely seen her at all.”

Y/F/N sighed. “Look, I don’t know why she’s avoiding you, but you had better figure it out and fix it. I was willing to forgive you over last year’s birthday incident because Y/N had insisted it was alright, but if you two fuck up again-”

“We won’t,” Natasha interrupted. “It broke our hearts to know we hurt her like that last year. We are not walking down that path again.”

Wanda nodded at Natasha in agreement.

“Okay. Just…please resolve whatever is going on before her birthday, okay? She deserves a good one this year.”

“We will. We are going to give her the birthday she deserves,” Wanda assured.

After the phone call, Nat and Wanda were at a loss for words.

“So she isn’t ignoring everyone, only us and the rest of the team,” Wanda reviewed.

“Right. So whatever the hell is going on has to do with something us and the rest of the team can be held accountable for. And I’m going to get to the bottom of it.” Nat said with determination.

*****************************************************************************************************

Two days before your birthday, Wanda was in the kitchen alone, cooking lunch for the team, when Natasha stormed in with a file in her hand.

“Wanda. You have to see this,” Nat said with a frown.

Wanda set down her spatula, turning down the heat of the burner she was using, before turning her attention to Natasha and the file she was holding.

“Is it about Y/N?” She asked hopefully. She had been just as worried about you, but had decided to take a less forward approach to getting you to open up, putting food in the fridge for you for after training and leaving you various sticky notes with encouraging messages all around the compound.

“Yeah. It’s about Y/N and her potential mission on the day of her birthday.”

Wanda’s eyes just about popped out of her head at that.

“Her what now?!” She all but yelled, snatching the file out of Natasha’s hand and opening it up.

Sure enough, the file contained information for a solo mission that needed attending to. On the inside of the folder was a sticky note with your handwriting on it, saying ‘just in case’.

“Just in case? What does that mean?” Wanda pondered.

“Hell if I know,” Natasha admitted, exasperated. “But I do know one thing. If she tries to go on that mission, I will personally drag her out of the Quinjet myself.”

Wanda nodded furiously. “Oh, you won’t be doing it by yourself.”

*****************************************************************************************************

It was now the day before your birthday, and your girlfriends still had no idea what was going on with you. You still were keeping away from everyone on the team, and at this point they were at a loss. They didn’t want to push you, but they needed to know what was going on in order to get things resolved before your special day.

The two were convening on the bed of your shared room when you quietly entered with a shopping bag in hand.

Their heads snapped up at your entrance, but you kept your eyes down.

“Kotenok?” Natasha tried softly.

“Hm?” You replied distantly while putting the shopping bag into the mini fridge in the room.

“Is everything okay, sweetheart?” Wanda asked.

You finally turned to look at them. You had dark circles under your eyes, which seemed puffier than normal. You were wearing a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. Something was wrong.

“Everything’s fine! I have to go to training, I’ll see you two later,” you rushed the words out before darting out of the room.

Once you were out of sight, Natasha and Wanda made brief eye contact before both all but sprinting to the mini fridge. Wanda pulled out the shopping bag, and looked inside. She gasped, before handing it to Nat.

Natasha took the item out of the shopping bag and her eyes glazed over with tears. Of course. The shopping bag had held a single Y/F/C cupcake with Y/F/F that had one candle in it. They finally understood what was going on. Now they just had to find a time to talk to you about it.

*****************************************************************************************************

You finally got back to your room at 11:30pm, and it was dark. Your stomach dropped, but you tried to blink away the tears quickly forming in your eyes. You had thought maybe your girlfriends would wait up with you to start your birthday with you. But honestly, even if they had remembered, you didn’t blame them for not wanting to be with you at the start of your special day. You had been so distant towards them, and felt like a terrible girlfriend. You stripped out of your clothes and put on pajamas, before crawling into bed, hoping for the second year in a row to sleep away your day.

But suddenly, the lights turned on to reveal your two girlfriends with gentle smiles on their faces. You sat up, confused.

“Nat? Wanda? What are you doing up?” You questioned.

Wanda sat next to you on the bed, Nat on your other side. Nat took your hand while Wanda began to rub your back gently.

“You thought we would go to bed before our favorite girl’s special day started?” Natasha asked with her signature smirk. But something else resided in her eyes. Understanding.

Your eyes filled with tears yet again as all your insecurities revolving around the day finally rushed to the surface.

Wanda was quick to pull you into her lap, running her fingers through your hair and pressing a kiss to the top of your head as you sobbed.

“Oh, honey,” she cooed, “it’s okay. We didn’t forget. We promise.”

Nat took on the role of rubbing your back and whispering sweet nothings into your ear until your cries began to quiet, and all that could be heard from you were soft sniffles.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Nat inquired gently.

You moved off of Wanda’s lap, positioning yourself between them again, and taking a deep breath before talking.

“I was scared you would forget,” you admitted quietly, and the two redheads nodded in understanding. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, or that I don’t forgive you or anything, I just…my birthday last year was ROUGH. I guess I was just terrified of having an awful day again this year, so I did what I could to prevent it.”

“You took a potential mission as an escape plan in case we forgot,” Natasha started, taking one of your hands.

“You bought yourself a cupcake so you could still celebrate yourself if things went wrong,” Wanda continued, taking your other hand.

“And I got distant to avoid being clingy,” you finished, squeezing both of their hands gently.

There was a moment of silence before Wanda spoke up.

“We made a mistake last year. You forgave us out of the kindness in your heart, but none of us can expect those underlying fears to go away. Those fears that we might mess up again. It’s understandable. All of your feelings are so valid, detka,” Wanda assured you, kissing your temple softly.

“Why didn’t you tell us about your concerns sooner, lyubov?” Natasha asked you gently.

“I didn’t want you to feel guilty about last year,” you said sheepishly.

Natasha laughed incredulously. “Sometimes I forget Wanda and I are dating the most selfless, considerate person in the world,” she said teasingly, nudging your shoulder with her own. “In this case, too considerate. We deserve to feel a little guilty about it every now and again. We know you forgave us, but we still fucked up. That fact doesn’t go away.”

Wanda nodded. “Please come and talk to us the next time you have these feelings, okay?”

You smiled softly at both of them. “Okay. Thank you, my loves.”

“Of course,” they replied in unison.

Wanda gasped as she looked at the clock. “It’s 11:59!”

Natasha looked at you adoringly. “Ready to be another year older?”

You beamed. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

The two women held you close as you watched the clock on your wall.

The clock struck midnight, and suddenly you were pinned down on the bed as your two redheaded girlfriends hovered above you.

“Happy birthday, sweetheart.”

“Happy birthday, kotenok.”

Before you could blink, Natasha was tickling you as Wanda peppered your face with kisses.

The room was full of the sound of your laugh, which Wanda and Natasha swore was the most beautiful sound they had ever heard.

When Natasha and Wanda finally ceased their attack, you were out of breath, a loving smile on your face. Natasha kissed you softly as Wanda turned out the lights and settled back in bed.

She pushed Natasha away playfully. “Stop hogging the birthday girl,” she teased, before crashing her lips to yours. When she pulled away, you couldn’t contain your smile.

“I love you both so much,” you said adoringly.

“We love you too, detka.”

“We always will, kotenok.”

The three of you curled up in bed together, you being in the middle, of course, you were the birthday girl, after all.

Natasha placed a gentle kiss to your forehead, and Wanda to your shoulder as the three of you settled in for the night, content in each other's arms.

“Get some sleep, sweet girl. We have a big day planned for you tomorrow,” Natasha whispered.

“Goodnight, pretty girl,” Wanda cooed.

And, as your eyes began to droop, for the second year in a row, your ears were filled with the soft sounds of your girlfriends singing happy birthday to you gently, only this year, it wasn’t to close off the day they had forgotten, but to open the one they had remembered.

You fell asleep with a peaceful smile on your face. And this time, the last thing you wanted to do was sleep through your special day.

Because they had remembered.

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