#literally held my breath as mai took off for the first time | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yamigooops · 2 years ago

Text

DiE4U

“you know that i’d die for, i’d cry for you know that i’d die for you you know that i’d breathe for, i’d bleed for you know that i’d breathe for you” - ‘DiE4U’ by Bring Me the Horizon

summary: when you are given the mission to infiltrate bakugou katsuki’s life and become his lover in order to quietly assassinate him, you never expected it to make your world crumble around you…

words: 16.7k

warnings: enemies to lovers? fluff to angst, main character death, seriously no happy ending, fem reader, oral sex (fem receiving), cockwarming, light impact play (literally one spank), light degradation, unprotected sex (WRAP THAT WILLY FOLKS), general dirty talk… if i missed anything let me know

a/n: i’ve literally worked on this piece for months and now that it’s finally done i don’t know what to do with myself… i cried multiple times while writing it, as it’s literally one of the saddest things i’ve ever read, much less written. so hopefully it makes you cry too because i don’t wanna be the only one. if it does lemme know because i want to know if i hit my goal lol. i’d say enjoy but hopefully you’ll be broken by the end soooo…….

It was always going to end like this. But it was never meant to hurt so badly, was never supposed to be this excruciating. Falling in love wasn’t part of the plan, and now you were paying the price.

It started almost a year ago. May 24th, an unassuming Wednesday afternoon. You’d been on your way home when you fell victim to a villain attack. However, the whole thing lasted hardly any time at all as Pro Hero Dynamight was on the scene in seconds when he heard your panicked scream from just down the street.

Now, it wasn’t his usual protocol to give his number out to victims. But he was so overcome with your beauty and courage in the face of danger that when you asked him for those ten digits he couldn’t help but scribble them down on a scrap of paper you handed him. He hadn’t planned on responding to your messages that night either, yet he found himself doing so anyway. His fingers flew across his screen as he accepted your offer to buy him a coffee the next morning, and the rest is history.

Coffee dates turned into grand dinners, which then became late-night ramen runs to his favorite hole-in-the-wall stalls after spending the night together. His days off were spent in your company, and his closet eventually came to house a small portion of your wardrobe. His bed came to bear two divots instead of just one, and his shower now held more soaps and bath necessities than it ever had in the past.

He invited you into every part of his life, and you tried desperately not to get too attached, knowing it would only hurt more in the long run. But dammit he made it so hard.

Waking up to the feeling of his calloused fingertips running soothing circles at the base of your spine had become one of your favorite feelings in the world. The love he held for you was so apparent in that small action that it nearly broke your heart.

Nearly.

You still had a job to do, and the end date was fast approaching whether you wanted it to or not. The day would come that all of this would come to an abrupt halt, and you’d have to move on with your life as if nothing had happened in the first place, hoping you’d made the right decision and that you could live with yourself after it happened.

But that was for future you to deal with. Right now, you let yourself bask in this soporific atmosphere. Took in the light that spilled through the crack in the curtains. Shifted your feet slightly as you readjusted atop your lover, legs tangled in the soft sheets. His chest rose and fell with the calm tempo of his breath as his heart pumped steadily within it, drumming a beat that you wished would never end.

But the nagging voice in the back of your head reminded you that if all went according to plan that beat would be cut short all too soon.

You adjusted slightly above him, positioning yourself against his bare skin so you could access the thick column of his throat. You placed delicate kisses on the skin there, glossing over the marks blooming from the night before. They’d last a few days at least, and the thought made you grin before you realized they’d likely still be there when you had to…

No, this wasn’t the time to think of that. In a few hours, you’d be on a plane headed to a beautiful destination with your lover. You were going to have the best few days of your life, and you refused to let the future destroy those plans.

“Mornin’ cutie,” Katsuki rumbled, eyes still shut as he continued to trace along your back with all the ease of a man with a day off.

“G’morning love,” you mumbled against his skin. Your fingers delved into his soft, tangled hair as you nipped at his ear, pulling a breathy chuckle from his lips.

“You ready to head to paradise?”

You sighed, nodding. “Boy am I ever. A whole four days of just you, no hero work, no distractions?” You pulled back enough to look at his sleepy, beautiful face. He cracked one eye open to meet your gaze as you hesitated for a moment. “Sounds like a dream come true,” you whispered in awe.

A genuine smile caught the corners of his mouth and tugged, cracking open that all-too-stern expression and giving way to a happier one. An expression you found you could look at from dawn until dusk, one you saw in your dreams. That smile would come to haunt you, but in this moment it was everything you ever needed and more.

Suddenly, he was rolling you over and pressing your back into the mattress, his arms caging you in and his thick thighs framing yours. “You don’t think you’ll get sick of me, huh?” He murmured as he buried his face in your neck, lips brushing your skin ever so lightly. “Don’t think you’ll want some time to yourself?”

You could barely breathe, your head descending into the fog of lust as he slowly ground his – very conveniently—bare hips against yours. His length was already hardening, and the breath caught in your throat as you lifted your hands to run your fingers over his chest. You savored the feeling of his hard muscle, overlayed by countless scars and a dusting of chest hair that you found incredibly attractive.

“And miss out on all this?” You hummed, dragging your nails lightly from his shoulders down over his pecs before looping your arms under his and caressing his back, pulling him closer. “Why would I ever do that?”

“Haven’t you heard, baby?” He moved farther down your neck, his lips dusting over your collarbones as he continued. “I must be ��brutish and savage in bed, a complete asshole of a partner.’ Because the tabloids know everything, after all.” He made it to the valley of your breasts, and you unhooked your arms from him before winding them through his hair once more.

“And who said I don’t like assholes, hmm?” Your back arched involuntarily as he pressed a particularly sweet kiss against your sternum, sending shivers up your spine.

He chuckled above you before shoving the duvet off the both of you with a huff and readjusting. He pulled each of your legs up one at a time, kissing from your knee up the inside of your thigh before switching to the other with a shit-eating grin at your needy whine. Before he reached your core after the second leg, he grabbed a pillow and eased both of your legs over his shoulders. He then slid the pillow beneath your hips and settled down on his elbows and stared at the scene before him. He had a look similar to reverence in his eyes as his hands soothed over your hips and stomach, and it had your heart fluttering in your chest.

“Why’re you looking at me like that,” you mumbled, trying not to sound too needy or embarrassed, but knowing you didn’t succeed at either.

“Just taking in the meal before I dig in.” His voice sent a thrill through you, and you didn’t even mind the use of a cheesy line when he said it like that – with such intensity and love that it made you want to melt into a puddle before he had even started.

But then he began, and digging in could hardly explain what he was doing to you. He savored you, taking his time working you up with languid swirls and strokes of his tongue. He switched between stimulating your clit and delving as deep into your depths as possible. When you got too used to one method he would jump back over to the other to keep you on your toes, which were currently curled as your heels dug into his back.

The breaking point was after he slipped two fingers into you, easing them in and out of your slick hole as his tongue worked on that sweet bundle at the apex of your thighs. Your grip on his hair had him moaning against your aching sex, and with one strategic curl of his fingers, he had you crumbling. Had you been standing your legs would have given out completely. The sound he ripped out of you was primal, almost animalistic, and as he worked you through your orgasm you saw your life with this man play out on the backs of your eyelids.

You’d get married in the next few years, and have a kid or two. He would continue with his hero work but would cut back on it a bit to be there for his family. You would put your children through all of the best schools, and make sure they got the best educations possible, so they’d have the opportunity to be whatever they wanted when they grew up. Katsuki would eventually retire, and once your children were all grown up and moved out you’d go somewhere magical, maybe even travel the world together.

But as the euphoria left your veins and Katsuki moved to hover over you, your essence glistening on his lips and chin, you reminded yourself to stay in this moment. To not get too far ahead of yourself. That would only bring more pain. And right now, you were about to get your brains fucked out.

As the two of you sat together on the private jet later that day, Katsuki’s hand rested on your bare thigh, his thumb stroking the soft skin there as he skimmed through a few work files with the other hand.

“Hey, I thought you said no work on vacation. Didn’t your sidekicks even yell at you to take a break?” You huffed, leaning your head against his shoulder with a pout on your lips.

He chuckled, squeezing the meat of your thigh lightly. “I said no work on vacation. I never said anything about on the way to vacation.” He pressed a kiss to your hair before returning to the documents. “Besides, what else is there to do to pass the time? It’s not like we can throw a party with just the two of us.”

You sighed, relegating yourself to spending so much of your remaining time with the man of your dreams watching him read through reports before the most obvious solution came to mind.

“Well,” you started, rising from your seat, and easing the tray above his lap off to the side as you stepped in front of him. “It might not be a party, but as you said, it’s just the two of us…” Thankfully the two of you had been seated on a couch along the side of the cabin, so there was ample room to place your knees on either side of his thighs. You pulled up your thin, flowy dress enough that it wasn’t caught beneath you as you settled on his lap, knees folded beneath you. Your hands found the sides of his face as you stroked at his cheeks, smoothing out his scowl lines as you gave him a soft, flirty smile.

“Besides, I heard there’s some club you get to join? The sky-high club – something like that…”

He placed his hands loosely on your waist, tilting his head slightly to look at you with hooded eyes and an emerging smirk. “The mile-high club, you mean?”

“Yeah,” you smiled, letting the word slide off your glossed lips like honey. “That one. Never done it before. Wanted to do it with you on that last flight, but it was too crowded. What better time than now when we have the whole plane to ourselves?” As you spoke, you ground your hips against his ever so slowly. The friction wasn’t enough to do much, just enough to try to convince him to follow up.

“Baby,” he sighed, closing his eyes. “I wanted to get this shit done before we landed so I didn’t have to worry about anything while we’re there…”

“That’s okay, I can sit still,” you shrugged. “Just… need you so bad.” Your glossy pout was working its magic, grinding him down until he couldn’t say no and gave you whatever you wanted. And right now, that was him. Inside you. For as long as he would allow, or until one of you broke. Whichever came first.

He raised a brow, looking at you skeptically. “You seriously think you can do it?” He lowered his voice, gripping your chin and tugging you closer until you could feel his minty breath on your cheeks. “Remember last time, when you wouldn’t listen, and I had to discipline you? And over my desk too,” he tsked, shaking his head in disappointment.

You shook your own in response. “No, I promise. I can do it. I just need you so bad,” you begged, your hands slipping down to grip the fabric of his shirt.

“You really think you’ll last? I mean, we still have…” He looked down to check his watch for the time. “Two and a half hours. You think you can make it two whole hours? If you can, you get to do whatever you want for the last half hour. But if not, that thirty minutes will be punishment. You up for it?”

You nodded vigorously, biting the inside of your cheek to keep from squirming in excitement. “I can, I promise. Just need you, please.”

He stared at you heatedly for a moment, one brow raised in a look that would have weaker women on their knees. But as you sat there with that pleading look in your eyes, he caved and nodded. “Alright then,” he huffed, as if this wasn’t something he was going to enjoy immensely as well.

With that, you excitedly reached down to tug down the front of his joggers, finding a bulge there already and grinning in excitement. As you eased out his cock, you found it flushed and leaking, already prepared to impale you. It sent a rush of heat through you, and you resisted the urge to lick your lips at the sight of it.

Standing briefly, you rid yourself of your lacy panties, the ones Kats had insisted you wear, simply for ease and comfort. Returning to your spot on his lap, you took him in your hand and guided his cock to your cunt. You were already soaked, the banter and anticipation getting to you more than you’d anticipated. You ran him through your folds a few times to coat his length in your essence, and you tried to keep from grinning at his little sighs of pleasure and the way his hands tightened their grip on your hips.

When you were satisfied, you raised on your knees and aligned his tip with your entrance before looking him in the eye and impaling yourself on his thick cock. You moved so slowly it made your thighs burn, but the way his eyelids fluttered, and his brows knit together at the feeling was more than worth it. Inch by glorious inch, he disappeared into your silky depths. That full feeling that you always craved was so satisfying you could cry, but you couldn’t give him that satisfaction. At least not this early into it.

As you came to rest back on his thighs, you found it a little hard to breathe. You felt so stuffed you could hardly think, much less form coherent sentences. He was nestled so deep inside of you that you could nearly feel him in your throat, the head of his dick pressed snuggly against your cervix. So, you were grateful when he took your chin in his fingers and tugged you forward to press a soft, chaste kiss to your lips before tucking you against his chest.

As he moved to retrieve the documents on the tray you’d moved earlier, you readjusted, moving so your legs were slightly more comfortable and your dress wasn’t pulled tight beneath you. His hand was seemingly faster than a bullet as it came down on your plush ass, the sound loud and abrupt in the quiet space of the cabin. Even with the covering of your dress it still stung like a bitch, but the moan that spilled from your throat was undeniably one of pleasure.

“I thought I said no moving,” he growled in your ear.

“I-I was ju-” you choked out, breath coming in short gasps as you tried to regain the ability to speak clearly. After swallowing and taking a few deep breaths you finally got the words out. “Was just getting comfy,” you whimpered meekly, burying your face in the crook of his neck. “Didn’t mean to squirm so much, ‘m sorry.”

He sighed before the same hand which had inflicted the pain came to soothe it. “Alright, I’m sorry. Thought you were trying to pull one over on me. Just… warn me next time. And let me know if your legs fall asleep, okay? We can readjust if you need.” There was genuine care in his voice, and it nearly brought tears to your eyes as his hand stroked over your throbbing skin.

As you nodded, he retrieved the documents from earlier and returned to reading them. You, on the other hand, had only him to entertain you. But that was more than enough, as you soaked in the feeling of him against you, inside you, wrapped all around you and engulfing you in his scent and his presence. This man had truly become your entire world in less than a year, and that should scare you more than it did, especially knowing what was to come.

But as his warmth and love enveloped you, there wasn’t enough room for all of the worry and doubt, so you cast it aside in favor of soaking him in instead.

~~~~~~~~~~

The fading sunlight shone through the leaves of the thick foliage as you stood on the balcony of your treehouse escape. It was a cozy place, an A-frame cottage held aloft in the trees near the shore of a small river, but it was secluded and comfortable. And the best part was that it was all the way over in Washington state, where no one knew who the two of you were. Here you could just be normal people instead of getting swarmed by paparazzi wherever you went. Thankfully both of you had a good grasp of the English language, so everything thus far had gone smoothly. You were just happy to be away from all the chaos of the daily hero life back home.

But could you actually call it that? Home? Surely it had begun to feel that way. But given everything that would transpire in the coming days you weren’t sure you deserved to use that term.

Again, you tried to push those thoughts out of your mind and remain in the current moment. The air was crisp here, and the sky shone with emerging stars and the fading glow of twilight as you sipped on your glass of wine. With a sigh you turned around to face inside, where you could see Katsuki standing with his back to you as he cooked dinner for the two of you. The sight of him nearly brought tears to your eyes. To see him so raw, so unguarded and pure, made you want to forgo everything you’d been directed to do and run away with him. But you knew they’d only send someone even worse to finish the job.

At least you would make it as painless as possible.

Throwing back the rest of your wine in the futile hope that it would give you the courage to face him, you pushed off the balcony rail and headed back inside. The tiny living space was warmly lit with a plush couch, a small kitchen, and a quaint dining area. There was a metal spiral staircase leading up to the second floor, which only extended over the kitchen, leaving the space over the living area wide open. The entire wall facing the river was glass, providing an unimpeded view of the forest beyond. Upstairs was a simple area, with just a king-sized bed and huge skylights opening up to reveal the night sky above you. It was gorgeous.

The perfect place to kill your lover, you thought sadly. It was quiet and remote, a ten-minute drive from the next closest home and a twenty-minute drive from the closest town. There would be ample time to dispose of his body and clean the crime scene before anyone suspected anything, and you’d easily be able to disappear into a new country where you’d form a new identity and escape the bonds of the organization you’d been forced to serve since you were a child.

You only wished you’d be able to take him with you.

“Whatcha cookin’?” Your voice was soft in the wooded structure, the natural materials and fabrics everywhere absorbing any echo that may occur.

“Just some ramen, nothing special. Didn’t have time to get much from the store, so we’ll have to go tomorrow and do some shopping.” He sounded so at ease at the stove, and you couldn’t help but step behind him and wrap your arms around his slim waist. You pressed your lips to his spine between his shoulder blades, and he sighed gently, placing his free hand atop yours.

“I’m sure it’s gonna be delicious anyway,” you smiled, resting your forehead against his back, and closing your eyes. You would give anything in the world to live like this for the rest of your life.

“You like my food no matter what, babe. I’m starting to think you’re just saying that to stroke my ego,” he chuckled. The sound was warm as it bubbled out of his chest and brought a genuine smile to your lips.

“And have you get an even bigger head than you already have?” You teased, your fingers slipping beneath the grey t-shirt he wore to skim along his stomach. “If it gets much bigger you’ll be the most insufferable man alive. I mean, you’re already the number two hero for fuck’s sake.”

He let the spoon he was stirring with rest against the side of the pot and slowly turned around in your arms. Coming to face you, he slipped his hands beneath your ears to caress your face with his large, calloused hands. It always surprised you just how gentle those hands could be, that while they could do so much damage, they were also capable of such love, such soft touch.

“To hell with all that bullshit. All I need is you,” he replied carefully, almost shyly. “I’m nothing without you, Y/N. You keep me sane, keep me grounded. I couldn’t do any of this without you.”

As you stared into those claret eyes you felt your chest tighten and your stomach tumble over itself. It wasn’t often that he shared his emotions so honestly, but every time he did it made you want to cry.

“Katsuki… I-”

He cut you off with a kiss on the forehead and a thumb brushing across your bottom lip. “I don’t think you fully get it. Every time I come home having been unable to save people, having been beaten within an inch of my life, and I get to see you there waiting for me? Waiting to love me and take care of me? There ain’t a single better feeling I’ve ever felt.” His lips brushed your forehead as he spoke, his fingers running across the skin of your jaw and neck and lips as if he didn’t know what else to do with them.

“Before you I had nothing. I’m pretty sure half my friends didn’t even really like me, the media was up my ass about every little thing I did, I hadn’t seen my family in years… My life fuckin’ sucked before I met you.” He pulled back just enough to look you in the eyes, and your heart cracked as you found tears in those burning eyes. “Then I saved you on the street that day, and everything started to get better. I know I suck at saying this stuff out loud, but you brought love into my life, and I can never fuckin’ thank you enough for that.”

Everything was quiet for a long moment as you simply looked at one another, drinking in the moment and the soft bubbling of the ramen and the chirping of the crickets outside. Your fingers clutched at the material of his shirt as you fought back your own tears.

“I don’t know what to say, Kats,” you murmured into the quiet.

He smiled slightly, leaning down to rest his forehead on yours. “That’s usually my role.”

You chuckled softly, closing your eyes, and reveling in the feeling of his hands against your skin, his breath on your cheeks. “I wish I could protect you too, Kats,” you whispered. “I wish I could keep all the bad things from you, but sometimes I feel so helpless… Like you’re the only one doing the work here.”

At this, he straightened and guided you into his chest. His arms enclosed you and his warmth seeped into your very being as he rested his cheek against your hair. “You do protect me though,” he replied after a moment of thought. “You give me the strength to keep fighting. You give me something to live for, and that’s enough to keep me from giving up. I’ve never felt stronger than when you came into my life.”

The tears which had been pooling in your eyes finally slipped past your lashes as you buried your face in his chest. His words had you rethinking everything you’d been directed to do, had you second guessing whether you’d really be able to carry through with it. In that moment you didn’t think you could. He had wormed his way into the heart you had once thought to be dead and had brought you back to life. As much as you had tried to keep that from happening he had somehow slipped past the guard you had so meticulously built over the course of your life to keep anyone and everyone from seeing what was inside. From seeing just how broken you really were.

But he had seen that chaos and ruin inside of you and started to rebuild you. He hadn’t shied away like so many others, but instead worked with you to improve and heal. Because he had a great deal of healing to do as well, so the mutual understanding you formed helped both of you.

“I don’t know what I’ll do without you,” you breathed into his chest, keeping your words just audible and allowing them to be muffled in his chest as you cried into it. His arms tightened around you as he kissed your head.

“You’ve got me, love. Until death do us part, or whatever the saying is. Besides, I’m not going anywhere anyway.”

You allowed yourself to keep crying, mourning the man you had come to love as you finally let it settle in that in a few days he’d no longer be there to comfort you. And the worst part was that he had no idea that his words hit so close to home.

The last three days had been absolutely magical. Spending so much quality alone time with Katsuki was like living a dream. You spent that time hiking, tasting local cuisine, lounging together, and of course, fucking like animals. He’d taken you on practically every surface in the house, and even convinced you to skinny dip with him in the jacuzzi outside, promising that the property was secluded enough that no one would see. That of course turned into a passionate few rounds of heated sex.

It was the final night the two of you had together, having rented the property until tomorrow afternoon, and you planned on taking advantage of every second you had left. He currently had you on your knees as he languidly thrust into you from behind. Your cries and moans were muffled by the mattress, and he kissed and bit at the back of your neck as he murmured such sweet words into your ear.

“Ah, fuck baby. Still so tight for me even after all this,” he growled lowly. His left hand gripped the meat of your hip as the right held your hair off to the side to expose your face and neck. “God, you were fuckin made for me.”

“Kats, need m-more,” you whined, your fingers tangling in the sheets. His thrusts were slow but powerful, and each one hit so deep you rapidly lost the ability to think coherently.

“Yeah? You need more, you greedy little thing? Tell me what you need. Can’t give you more if you don’t tell me.” He bit at your shoulder, sucking what you were sure was a deep purple mark as you tried to gather your scattered thoughts.

“Harder,” you pleaded. “F-faster. Please!”

His moan had a thrill running through you from head to toe. “Fuck baby, that what you want? Want me to fuck you into the mattress?”

“Yes! Please, need you so bad!”

He gave a particularly harsh thrust before stilling deep inside you. You whined at the loss of friction, but his fingers snaked around your hip to find your clit, where it started applying such sweet pressure.

“I don’t know sweetheart, I’m getting a little tired,” he murmured into your ear. “Kinda wanna see you put in a bit of effort, know what I mean?”

You groaned, feeling yourself rapidly falling down the hill of pleasure he had so tentatively built up. “Just need you, Kats, I’ll do anything.”

“Yeah?” Katsuki’s voice was playful as he released your hair and wrapped his right arm firmly across your chest. He then rolled to the right and switched positions, placing you atop him before coming to grip your hips, which were still impaled on his thick cock. “Then show me, pretty girl. Show me how bad you want it.”

You moved to turn around to face him, but his hands tightened on your waist, hindering your movement. “Wanna see you, Kats,” you cried, looking back at him.

He had a sly smile on those kiss-swollen lips that had your stomach churning. “But I wanna watch you like this. Just for a bit at least. C’mon baby, you’re a big girl. You can hold out a little longer, can’t you?” His tone was taunting, almost like he wanted you to fight him on it to see what he would do. But your nerves steeled at his words, and you narrowed your eyes.

“Fine, be that way,” you hissed, turning back around, and placing your hands on his thighs. “I’ll do it myself then.” You began grinding your hips against his, your fingers digging into the firm muscle of his legs. They were so thick you could barely fit a hand across the top of them, and the thought of grinding against them was almost tempting enough to leave his cock behind.

But not quite enough.

You slowly raised yourself onto your knees before dropping back down quickly, repeating the process over and over as your fingers found your clit and started working it. As good as Katsuki was with the little bundle of nerves, you knew your body better than anyone, knew which patterns and how much pressure would work yourself up the fastest. So, the added stimulation of his cock impaling you and his hands working the fat of your ass and hips had you falling into the throes of pleasure faster than usual.

As your head fell back, your mouth hanging open in a silent moan, Katsuki threaded his thick, calloused fingers through your hair and tugged. Your back arched as your free hand flew back to support yourself on his solid stomach. He began thrusting up into you, his movements matching yours and coaxing you to move faster and faster. The loud squelching of arousal mixed with your breathy moans and his deep growls to create a symphony of debauchery that had your head spinning and your chest heaving.

You drew closer and closer to the edge of pleasure as he thrust ever more vigorously into your silky, creamy depths, and you were growing louder by the second. His knees came up as he gave himself more leverage to pound into you even harder, and you were falling apart in his arms before he knew it.

You nearly screamed at the shattering of the dam inside you, pleasure washing over you like a tsunami as he continued pumping in and out of you. You faintly registered his words as he coaxed you through your release.

“Fuck yeah baby, let it all out,” he groaned. “Shit, that pussy’s gonna squeeze the life outta me.”

Your legs had turned to jelly, but you tried your best to match his movements as he chased his own high. You could tell by the tension in his stomach and the shortness of his breath that he was getting close. But the growing overstimulation had you crying atop him as he pounded into you from below, his hands both firmly grasping your hips to help you bounce on his cock like a pliant little fuck toy.

“Goddammit, so fuckin close,” he cried, your moans and pleas driving him ever closer to the breaking point.

“I fucking love you, Bakugou Katsuki!” You couldn’t hold back the words even as your nerves were overwhelming you with painful pleasure, even as his fingers dug into your flesh and your insides burned with his passion.

That was the straw that broke the camel’s back, so to speak. In a rush of pleasure and adoration, he fell off the cliff and into the depths of hedonism. Like a floodgate being opened you were filled with heat, his hips stilling beneath you as a loud, beautiful moan tore out of his chest. You wished you could see his face, but you were too overwhelmed to even think about looking behind you.

Easing his length in and out of your leaking cunt a few more times to draw out his climax, his hands ran over your hips and bottom. They warmed slightly with his quirk to soothe the forming and past bruises there as you both heaved for air.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he huffed, easing you down against his chest. Your skin stuck together with a sheen of sweat, but you couldn’t care less. You simply basked in the feeling of his arms around you and his chest moving beneath you and his heart racing against your ribcage.

“Fuck indeed,” you breathed, reaching behind you to thread your fingers through his damp hair. He sighed heavily at the feeling, his chest lifting you and easing you back down.

“I could die right now a happy man,” he chuckled, his hands roaming your chest and stomach and hips.

His words had your heart dropping in your chest. Did he know? Was he aware of your plans, your mission? Did he figure out that you had been tasked to get close to him so you could assassinate him and rid the world of the shining light he cast in hopes of snuffing out the shadows of villainy?

But how could he? You had never said anything, were a trained assassin, had been taught everything there was to know about stealth, misdirection, infiltration, all of that. And you’d been trained since the age of 6 when you’d been found abandoned on the streets by one of the worst criminal organizations in Japan. The whole situation which led to your “chance meeting” had been a ploy strategically executed where he’d been patrolling that day. Your quirk, “Comply,” had been perfect for this mission because it helped you convince him to give you his number, to let you into his life. But you’d stopped using it months ago when you realized he might truly like you, maybe even love you.

And that’s the part that hurt the most.

Both of your feelings had become genuine, and now you were about to betray that love, that trust, and kill him. And it had to be done tonight. There wasn’t much time left, despite wishing you’d had more of it. But as you’d told yourself so many times before, if you didn’t do it someone else would. And they would make it much worse for him than you would.

“Don’t say that Kats. You don’t know what that means,” you pleaded softly. You tried to focus on the feeling of his softening cock inside you, tried to get your mind to shift to any topic but this as you prayed he would drop the subject. But to no avail.

“But I would. If it meant keeping you safe I would take a bullet to the heart,” he whispered into your ear, placing soft kisses on the shell of it.

You reluctantly rolled off his chest and onto the sheets beside him, resting on your elbows as you looked at him. “Don’t make me think about that, please.” Your eyebrows came together as you begged him to stop, and he looked at you with wide eyes, surprised at your response.

“Y/N, I- I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you,” he tried to comfort you, easing onto his side, and placing his hand on the back of your head. “But I would still do everything in my power to protect you, you know that, right?”

You nodded sadly, looking down at your hands. “I know you would,” you mumbled. And that’s the problem, you added in your head. Taking a breath, you shook your head slightly to try and clear it. “It’s fine. Let’s just not talk about you dying, yeah?” You looked at him once more, and he nodded with a small smile. “Ok, good. Now I’m gonna go shower and make us some tea.”

“You want me to join you?” Katsuki raised one brow suggestively as the hand he had on the back of your hand traveled downward along your spine, eventually making its way to pinch your ass. You flinched slightly before huffing and pushing back onto your knees out of his reach.

“No dummy, we just went 3 rounds. My poor vagina needs a break. Plus, if you do that we’ll never get out. I wanna watch a movie or something before we have to leave tomorrow. We never get to do that.”

He sighed, “Yeah, guess you’re not wrong. I’ll take one after you.”

You nodded before scrunching your nose playfully. “Good, because you’re stinky. Don’t wanna cuddle with you till you smell good.”

He looked like he wanted to shoot back with a snarky comment, but you scrambled off the bed and clambered down the stairs before he could do that. Heading to the small bathroom, you turned on the shower and looked at yourself in the mirror above the sink. Your hair was a mess, and your neck, shoulders, and chest were all covered in bite marks and hickeys. You ran your fingers over them, noting their positions as they were likely the last ones you’d ever receive. You weren’t sure you’d ever be able to love after Katsuki. You weren’t even sure you’d want to.

Looking down at your hips, you found his fingers had left behind small bruises from how hard he had loved on you, and you found yourself smiling sadly at them. As you stepped into the shower, you let your hand roam between your legs, finding the entire area wet and sticky with a mixture of both of your cum. The fluid was milky and thick, and you couldn’t help but place one finger on your tongue and suck it clean before the water washed away the rest of it. It was salty, the aftertaste earthy and heady.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, you tried to rid your mind of your love and adoration for this man and tried to focus on the task at hand. You started by cleaning yourself, moving through your shower routine almost robotically. You couldn’t think of all the showers you’d taken with Katsuki in the past, couldn’t remember the feeling of his fingers against your scalp as he helped wash your hair, or how he would drag your loofa across your skin and down between your legs in the aftermath of a hot round of sex. If you thought about those things you would lose the nerve to go through with your plan and would lose this prime opportunity.

Turning off the water, you stepped out onto the warm wooden floor and wrapped yourself in a fluffy towel. You didn’t clear the mirror of fog as you normally would because you knew you wouldn’t be able to stand the sight of yourself right now. Instead, you just dried yourself off and slid into the silk camisole and shorts you’d brought with you. Opening the door, you turned toward the kitchen and found Katsuki in his full naked glory standing at the counter with a pot on the stove, making what you assumed to be popcorn.

“Makin’ snacks for our movie?” You asked, even though you knew the answer.

He nodded, watching as you found the kettle and filled it with enough water for two cups of tea. “Well you can’t have a movie night without popcorn, idiot,” he replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“I can finish it,” you gestured toward the pot handle. “You can go shower. It’ll be ready by the time you’re done.” You’d be lying if you said you didn’t use a hint of your quirk there, needing him to be in the shower so you could prepare for what was to come.

“Ok, just make sure you don’t burn it,” he smiled, grabbing the sweats and tee he had brought down with him.

“I won’t burn it you doof,” you rolled your eyes and took the handle he offered you. “Go shower so you don’t stink anymore.”

“Alright, alright, I’m going,” he groaned, putting his hands up in surrender. He chuckled as he made his way to the bathroom, however, he stopped outside the door to turn and look at you with a sly grin on his lips. “You should order me around more. It’s kinda hot.”

You felt your cheeks warm at his words and looked down at the pot in front of you. He laughed at that, and made his way into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. As you heard the water turn on, you waited a few moments until you were sure he’d gotten in before making your move. Using all the stealth you’d learned over your years of working for villain organizations you made your way upstairs. Since you’d been here for a few days you knew where the stairs and floor were creaky, so you carefully avoided those areas.

Picking your way over to your bag, you reached into an inside pocket where you had a bottle that held pain relief pills. Pouring them into your hand, you searched for the one that looked different, just slightly off-white compared to the white pain relief pills. Making your way quickly back downstairs as the popcorn began popping, you retrieved two mugs from the cupboard and dropped the tablet in the left mug.

The water was just coming to a boil as you placed the tea bags in each mug. Shaking the popcorn pot once more, you filled both mugs, starting with the left one to give the tablet ample time to dissolve. It was a neurotoxin that was colorless, tasteless, and odorless. Mixed with the tea, it would kill him within minutes. That would give you enough time to hopefully explain the situation and get the guilt off your chest, at least as much as possible. It would always be there, and you’d simply have to live with that.

Pouring out some of the popcorn into a large bowl, you recovered it and placed it back on the stove to let the rest of it pop. Your heartbeat was slowly increasing as you stirred the teas, watching as the tablet dissolved and mixed with the hot beverage. As the water turned off in the bathroom, you poured out the rest of the popcorn, took a deep breath, and placed the pot in the sink.

You heard the door open a few minutes later to reveal a freshly cleaned Bakugou Katsuki as he rubbed at his hair to dry it. The strands were soft and damp beneath the towel, and you wanted nothing more than to run your fingers through them and kiss him silly. He looked so at peace in his light grey sweats and t-shirt, and if you ignored what you were about to do to him you could imagine you really were just about to sit down and have a nice movie night together.

“It doesn’t smell like burnt popcorn,” he chuckled as he stepped beside you and looked at the white snack. “I’d say that’s a win.”

“Katsu, that was one time,” you whined, putting your hand on his face, and pushing him away playfully.

He laughed heartily, grabbing you by the wrist and gently pulling you against him. “Babe, you almost caught the whole kitchen on fire. There’s a reason I’m the one who does most of the cooking.”

“I do some of it,” you huffed, pouting dramatically. “And I haven’t caught anything on fire since then.”

He shook his head, still grinning. “No, I suppose you haven’t. Still doesn’t mean you’re a master in the kitchen though.”

“Yeah, well, I’m better than I used to be so that’s something.” You shrugged against his chest.

“It is, I’ll give you that. You’re a very good sous chef.”

Sighing, you pulled back enough to look up at him. “Okay. Here’s the big question: what should we watch?”

He chuckled, shaking his head slightly as he leaned back against the counter, his hands coming to rest on your hips. “I don’t know, you got anything in mind?”

You pretended to think, already knowing your answer. “Not sure… What’s your favorite movie ever? You’re into sappy romance shit, right?”

Katsuki scoffed, brows nearly meeting in the middle as he scowled at you. “N-No, where would you get that idea?”

“That right there would be my answer,” you grinned, noting his stutter. “So, what’s your fave? The Notebook? Titanic?”

He growled, eyes looking anywhere but your own as his cheeks glowed a faint, lovely shade of pink. “None of that shit, idiot,” he grumbled. “It- it’s Totoro…” The final words were nearly too quiet to hear, but you caught them, nonetheless.

“My Neighbor Totoro?” You clarified, and he nodded shallowly. “Well, that’s great, because that’s my comfort movie. So, we’re watching that.”

He sighed, leaning his head back in mock defeat. “If you insist,” he groaned dramatically. A chuckle slipped from your lips, which you briefly pressed against the pulse beating in his neck, savoring the feel of it while you still could.

“I do. Now let’s go get cozy and watch that shit.” You reached behind him to grab the bowl of popcorn and took him by the hand, half dragging and half guiding him toward the couch. You purposely left the mugs of tea on the counter, hoping to get just a little more time with him before the end.

As you placed the bowl on the coffee table, he flopped onto the couch, making sure to take up as much room as possible as a shit-eating grin spread across his face. As you turned to sit, you placed your hands on your hips and tried your best to look annoyed as a smile tugged at the corners of your own mouth.

“And where am I supposed to sit?”

He spread his arms and made grabby hands, a gesture he only made once in a blue moon when he was feeling particularly domestic. “Right here, obviously.”

With a playful huff, you climbed aboard, straddling his hips as you settled atop his chest. It took some adjusting, as the piece of furniture wasn’t all that big, but eventually you found a comfortable position where no limbs should fall asleep, and you were nestled squarely in his arms. He had even managed to spread a blanket over the both of you.

“You’re my very own weighted blanket,” he chuckled as you used the remote to search for the movie.

“And you’re my own personal space heater, so I guess we’re even,” you retorted, poking him in the cheek. You selected the movie and placed the remote on the table before you, realizing that the popcorn you had made was somewhat inaccessible due to the position the two of you were in. You decided to leave it there in favor of spending the remainder of your time with Katsuki tangled up together. You couldn’t be bothered to worry about the white snack when he was so all-encompassing anyway.

“Shush, dumbass. The movie is starting,” he quipped, hand coming up to flick you on the tip of the nose. You playfully huffed and swatted at his hand, before returning your own to rest atop his shoulder. He was right, though. The opening scene played, and you hummed along to the song that introduced the movie.

As it played out before you, it took everything in you to not cry. Knowing this was the last bit of time you’d be spending with him had a sense of finality to it that you wished you never had to feel in the first place. As his fingers eased their way beneath your silken shirt, he ran them across your skin at a pace that would have anyone else falling asleep in his arms. But your current predicament had your nerves on fire and your mind racing, even as one of the most calming movies you’d ever seen played out before you.

Very few words were spoken as you reveled in each other’s presence. You weren’t sure you’d even be able to form words as the lump in your throat grew nearly unbearable. You could hardly breathe, and you knew that at any point you could break down in tears. Nevertheless, you had to stay strong-willed and determined. This had to be done tonight, by you, or it would just be so much worse for both of you.

“I love you, Katsuki. You know that, right?” You mumbled the words against Katsuki’s chest as the movie neared its conclusion.

“Course I do, little one.” His voice was soft as one of his hands came to rest on the back of your hair.

“No, like I really love you. I can’t imagine my life without you anymore, and I am terrified of the day I lose you. Whether that’s tomorrow or fifty years from now. It’s going to be the worst day of my life.”

He sighed, drawn out and thoughtful. His fingernails ran gently over your scalp, and you allowed your eyes to fall shut at the feeling. “What’s got your mind going to such a dark place, baby?”

You were silent for a moment, hoping to make it a bit closer to the end of the movie before starting to give anything away in the slightest. After all, he hadn’t ingested any of the neurotoxin yet, so you couldn’t raise any suspicions yet.

“I don’t know, I just get really worried sometimes when I see you on the news fighting all these shitty villains. Even though I know you’re stronger than them, I can never stop wondering if one of these days someone is going to get the upper hand and seriously hurt you.” You gripped the material of his shirt as you whispered the next words. “Or even kill you. I would fall apart. Sometimes the thought makes my chest hurt so bad I have to go somewhere quiet and just cry.” Your words weren’t a lie, but you couldn’t tell him that you were going to be the person about to get said upper hand.

Katsuki took in your words seriously, letting them sink in as the end credits began to roll. You could practically hear the gears in his head whizzing as he formulated some kind of answer that might ease your worries. But that was a difficult thing to do when you loved someone as much as you loved each other, and one member of the relationship was constantly putting themselves in danger’s way for their career.

“Do you believe in me?”

His response made you pause. Of course, you believed in him. You knew that this man could do anything he put his brilliant mind to. He could solve any problem, defeat any villain, save any person he wanted to. But what would he do against a poison that would kill him within minutes in such a remote place? The antidote would be nowhere near close enough to save him in time as you had brought none with you. So, while you believed in him in every other situation imaginable, you couldn’t say you did in this particular instance.

“Of course I do,” you murmured.

The hand which had been running along the length of your spine came to ease your head up to face him, your chin resting against his collarbone. Tears had begun to sting your eyes as you looked at his own determined ones.

“Then I need you to trust that I will always come back for you,” he stated, his tone indicating that he took those words as a fact. Those words weren’t just a flimsy promise, but an oath. And that was what had your tears falling yet again. They slipped from the corners of your glassy eyes and cascaded down your cheeks, only to be brushed away by careful, comforting fingers.

“But what about the day that you don’t? What do I do then? Where will blind faith get me when I’m standing here alone without you?” Your bottom lip trembled as you whispered your fears into the quiet between you. “You are my compass, Katsuki. I’m lost without you.”

“Y/N, even after I’m dead and gone I will still be with you. You can’t get rid of me that easily. I’m too much of a stubborn bastard to let something as trivial as death separate us, right?” He tried to sound upbeat, obviously eager to get off the topic of his inevitable fate but still hoping to ease your worries.

A smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you let him wipe the last of your tears away. “Yeah, sounds like you.”

“And here you are doubting my resolve like a damn idiot,” he grinned softly. “Why don’t we go grab some fresh tea and we can head up and read or cuddle before bed, yeah?”

You nodded, trying to ignore the way your stomach dropped at the reminder of the tea. “Yeah, that sounds nice. ‘Bout time we get off this tiny damn couch.”

He chuckled, easing the blanket off your body, and helping you maneuver off his chest and onto solid ground. As you stretched your arms above your head to get the blood flowing once more, he reached over to place a playful smack on the exposed skin of your ass. Whipping around to give a halfhearted glare, you were greeted with the sight of a sly grin and adoring eyes as he tucked his hands behind his head and crossed his legs against the arm of the couch.

“Just admiring the view, babe. Can’t go around lookin’ like that and expect me to keep my hands to myself the whole time.”

Rolling your eyes, you fought a smile as you made your way to the counter. Now came the moment of truth. You’d thought over how you would approach getting him to drink the tea throughout the entire movie and had come up with what you hoped was a decent plan. You opened the microwave door and picked up both mugs, placing them on the glass dish inside. You placed his with the handle facing the wall of the device while the handle of yours pointed toward the center of the dish. That way, even if they were in a different position when the timer went off you’d still be able to tell which was which.

“No, no, no. What the hell are you doing, dumbass?” He called from the couch as he sat up. You turned to grin at him.

“I figured that while in America we should do as the Americans, just once. I want to see how it turns out,” you giggled. “I’ve seen people trying it on TikTok and I wanted to do it myself. And I’m making you do it with me.”

Katsuki scoffed, nose scrunching up at the thought. “The thought that you’re about to microwave that shit when you could make a perfectly good cup in five minutes is repulsive.” He grunted softly as he stood, following your lead, and stretching languidly. As he did, his shirt rose and exposed how dangerously low riding his sweats were. The dark trail of hair disappearing beneath them had your mouth watering, clouding your mind briefly before he dropped his arms, and you snapped back to reality.

Turning back to the microwave, you shut the door and set it for a minute before hitting start. That should be enough time to get the liquid piping hot, enough to get him to wait until you were upstairs to drink it. Though Katsuki was notorious for drinking his beverages at a much higher temperature than the average person, so you planned to carry it upstairs yourself anyway.

“When in Rome, do as the Romans, right?” As the plate started spinning you kept your grip on the door handle, needing to hold onto something to keep your balance. Your head was swimming as the reality of your situation truly sank in. You were really about to assassinate not just your lover, but the number two hero in all of Japan. A man who was supposed to be invincible, untouchable.

And he had absolutely no idea, so far as you knew.

There was a haziness to your mind from then on as you forced yourself into the headspace of the assassin you were by trade. That would be the only way you could get through this without coming clean and dooming you both. You had to block out any feelings that may slip in and compromise the mission.

Your stupor was shattered by the sharp stabs of the microwave timer, and you almost robotically opened the door and pulled out the mugs. Katsuki had made his way over to the base of the stairs and waited patiently as you padded over to join him. He made no move to take his cup from your hand, just allowed you to go up first with a steadying hand placed lightly on your hip.

Making your way over to his side of the bed, you placed his mug down on the polished hardwood side table and moved to your own side. He climbed onto the mattress, which he had hastily covered with the duvet after you’d gone to shower. There was a throw blanket on the floor which you picked up and tossed at him playfully, aiming right at his face. You had to keep this as normal as possible so he wouldn’t suspect anything.

“Hey, watch it brat,” he huffed, pulling the fabric from his head and grinning at you. You found a similar expression spreading over your own features as you put down your own mug and leaped on top of him. A grunt escaped his lungs at the impact, and you went as limp as possible in an attempt to hold him down.

That grunt was followed by a low, rumbling laugh as he threw the blanket over you, rolling you up like a burrito and trapping you beneath his body. The entire time you found yourself giggling uncontrollably, reverting to a natural, lovesick state of mind for what might be the last time. You squirmed beneath him, trying to escape, but he simply straddled your hips with his powerful legs and framed your head with his arms, staring down at you with glittering, mirthful eyes.

“This is what brats get, yeah?”

“Katsuki~” You groaned through your laughter. “You can’t just put me in a taco every time I annoy you!”

“Oh yes I can,” he shrugged, one brow lifting as he rocked back to sit on your thighs. His chest lowered to lay atop your own, and you huffed as he crossed his arms across your chest and rested his chin on them with that shit-eating grin. “I wish I could just wrap you up and put you in my pocket all the time, actually.”

You chuckled again, attempting to free one of your hands to no avail. “It would probably be gross and sweaty in there.” You feigned a look of disgust, at which he laughed once more.

“That’s probably not wrong, though you’d deserve it after being such a little shithead.”

“Yeah? Well…” you tried to think of a snarky retort but found yourself losing your train of thought as his eyes softened. “Well, you’re just a-a nerd, so ha!”

A puff of air made its way from his nose as he lifted his chin to allow one hand to come up and caress your face. “I thought you liked nerds,” he murmured, fingers running over your skin as you pouted slightly. “Means I’m smart right?”

“Well of course you’re smart, idiot. Doesn’t mean you’re not still a nerd. I mean, just look at your All Might shrine at home! That’s nerd behavior.”

Laughter shook through the both of you as Katsuki buried his face in your chest. It was genuine, from the heart. It was also one of your favorite sounds in the world, and you tried to savor it as it happened so rarely. Not to mention that this would be the last time you’d hear it.

“I guess you’re right on that one,” he choked out through his fits of delight. “It kinda is a shrine, ain’t it?”

His joy was contagious it seemed; you began to shake with your own laughter. “Yes, it absolutely is!”

As the two of you settled he raised his head once more to look you in the eye. His face was a fair shade of pink and the humor still sparkled in his expression as he raised himself enough to press a sweet kiss to your neck. Your giggles petered out soon after as his lips climbed the column of your throat, then across your jaw and up the other side of your face, following the path of your hairline. They smoothed out the slight line between your brows and trailed down the bridge of your nose, and all the while he murmured soft praises against your skin.

“I love you more than All Might any day of the week, sweetheart. You’re the most captivating, fascinating, quick-witted person I know. The best lover I’ve ever had. You’re my everything.”

His love swept over the apples of your cheeks; your eyes fluttered shut and you savored that love as it filled the cavity of your soon-to-be-empty chest. He paused, lips just a hairsbreadth away from yours as he seemed to think over his next statement.

“I hope you know that I will always love you.” The words were barely audible, yet they took all that warmth that had just spread throughout your body and crumpled it up into a cold, dead weight that settled into the pit of your stomach. As Katsuki’s lips made contact with yours, one hand coming to cradle your head as the other held him aloft, you felt tears prick at the backs of your eyes.

The kiss lasted but a moment, yet it left you breathless and dazed. He lifted himself from his position above you, moving off to the side to settle against the pillows. He watched with a small smile as you struggled to free yourself, with no help from him. As he waited, he reached over to pick up his cup, and you forced yourself back into that cold headspace as you prepared for the inevitable.

He waited, however, until you had escaped your fluffy binds and sat beside him, your mug in hand. You took a sip, finding the liquid still scalding against your tongue. He snickered as you flinched away from it, quickly breathing in and out through your mouth in an attempt to cool your scorched skin. You noticed from the corner of your eye as he took a big gulp of his tea, and you had to fight the voice screaming in the back of your mind to stop him. To warn him that it was going to be the end of him.

He slung his arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer to his side before taking another sip and resting the cup on his leg. “I mean, it’s certainly not as good as fresh tea, but it’s not as bad as I had expected,” he shrugged, referencing the fact that it had been microwaved.

“Heh, yeah, not wrong I guess.” You forced your lips to curl up at the corners as you took an actual sip of your beverage. There was silence for a long moment, the tension unlike anything you had ever experienced with the explosive man beside you, as you prepared to come clean. He took one more sip, and you took a deep breath.

Now or never.

“Katsuki, listen… I-”

“I know,” he cut you off gently, softly, as if he didn’t want to scare you off. Your head snapped up to look at him, only to find his blank gaze fixed on the tea in his hand. “I already know,” he stated once more as you looked at him with thinly veiled shock.

“W-what do you know? What are you talking about?” You knew you should play this incredibly safely just in case he wasn’t privy to the actual plan.

“I know that this tea is poisoned. I know you were sent to kill me. I know who you’re working for.” His voice was sad, almost regretful as he met your gaze. “I know everything.” You couldn’t speak for a long moment, simply staring at him with slowly widening eyes as he gave you a sad smile.

“How do you…” Your voice trailed off, your mouth going unbearably dry as you tried your best to wrap your head around what he was saying.

“I’ve only known for a few weeks. Intel came in about a group that was planning to kill me, your group. Word had it that they’d gotten an assassin to infiltrate my inner circle in order to take me out quietly, and I wracked my head for days trying to figure out who it could be. Every path I followed brought me to one person: you.” He leaned over to place his steaming mug on the table before licking his lips to remove any remaining liquid and returning to you. “You were the only person who had gotten close enough to have even the slightest chance of taking me out in the last couple years, the only new variable in my life that could have presented such a threat. And even though I didn’t want to believe it – fuck, I still don’t want to believe it – I knew in my heart that it was you…”

“Katsuki, I-” You choked on guilt and remorse over the knowledge that he knew. He had figured it out. You knew this man was brilliant, that he was the number two hero for a reason. You’d seen him in action more times than you could count at this point, and he never failed to amaze and impress you with both his physical and mental prowess. So, you weren’t sure why it was coming as such a surprise that he had figured this out.

“Y/N, it’s okay,” he whispered. His free hand reached over to loop under your legs, easing them across his lap so he cradled you close to his chest. “I get it. I understand why you had to do this. Your life was on the line, right?”

You felt all the tension in your body at that moment, your hands shaking slightly and your mind racing. “Yeah,” you croaked. “If I didn’t do it they were going to torture and kill me…”

He sighed softly, his hand running soothingly up and down your leg. “Kinda figured the bastards would do that. And was the plan the same for me too?”

You nodded silently, tucking your hands between both of your chests and curling into him. You were ashamed and slightly horrified that he had found out already. You were also dully angry at yourself for not realizing it sooner. Surely he had to have acted differently in the last few weeks, right? He’d have to be insane to just accept his death like that, especially having the status and influence that he had… He was the symbol of victory, after all. He couldn’t afford to lose; it would disrupt the whole society of Japan just like your gang wanted.

“Why are you just letting me kill you, Katsuki?” You had to know, the words slipping through your lips like the silk of your shirt through his fingers.

He was quiet for a moment, thinking over his response. “Do you remember what I told you earlier?” You tried to think back on what he could be referring to, but you were having trouble recalling anything but the current moment, so you shook your head. “I told you that if it meant keeping you safe I was willing to die for you. And I meant it. I knew that at some point you were going to have to do this, and I kinda figured it would happen sometime while we were here. It would give you the smallest chance of getting caught, and the highest chance of escape. It makes a lot of s-sense, really.” His voice faltered as he spoke, and your head snapped up to look at him.

His skin was growing sallow, and beads of sweat were starting to form on his forehead. The poison was starting to kick in.

You quickly moved to straddle his lap, bringing your hands to cup his chin as the reality of the situation threatened to crush you into a million tiny shards. “I’m sorry, Katsuki,” you cried, tears once again forming in your eyes as his clammy fingers slipped under your shirt to caress the skin of your sides. “I just couldn’t let them torture you. I know how strong and capable you are, but no one who’s stood against them has survived. They would have killed you, or at least hurt you to the point that you’d be out of action for the rest of your life. Which I know for you might as well mean death. I just- I couldn’t let them do that…”

“I know baby, I know,” he murmured. There was a dull thump as his head fell back against the headboard and he fought to keep his eyes open. “I just need you to know that everything I felt for you was real, still is real. And I’m sure it may have just started as a mission for you, but I’m pretty sure-” He broke off to take a deep breath, swallowing dryly. “I’m pretty fuckin’ sure you loved me too by the end of it, right?”

You nodded vigorously, the tears breaking the confines of your eyelashes and flooding down your cheeks as you fought for air. “I absolutely did. I love you more than anything, Bakugou Katsuki. I was an orphan when they took me in, and I was raised as a killer. I never thought I’d find love, but then you saved me that day, and we went on that date, and I knew that I was fucked.”

He chuckled wryly, coaxing a similar sound from your own lips. “That was a setup, right?” You nodded slowly, hating to admit it even as he was dying. “And do you have a quirk?”

Again, you nodded. “It’s called Comply. But I only used it a couple times before everything became so natural that I had no need for it anymore… I could tell that I was going to be completely empty after I carried this out.” Your voice shook with emotion as you tried to make him out clearly through the blurriness of your tears.

He slowly, shakily raised a hand to your face and brushed his thumb under your eye, his touch weak compared to how firm it usually was when he swept away your tears. “Please don’t blame yourself, love,” he muttered, brows furrowing. “I know you didn’t choose this.”

A guttural sob ripped from your throat as you collapsed into him, burying your face in his shoulder, and wrapping your arms around his neck. One hand came to cushion the back of his head, your fingers threading through his hair as you tried to hold him back from the throes of oblivion. His skin was feverish and clammy as the toxin spread through his body, and you attempted to hide your sorrow, tried to let him go peacefully.

“All I ask is this,” he whispered. You lifted your head slowly, using the hand not supporting his head to scrub at your eyes so you could see him a bit more clearly before nodding. “Escape. Tell them the mission is done, do whatever you have to do after this to hide the evidence. But once that’s all done-” he took a ragged breath, eyes fluttering shut as he tried to stay conscious. “After that get the fuck outta here, got it?”

“G-got it,” you forced out. Your lips trembled as you fought back more tears, attempting to stay strong even as the man you loved was dying in your arms. “I promise.”

He nodded, smiling slightly. “Good. Those bastards can f-fuck off. They won’t be able t-to hurt you anymore. Once you finish up here, destroy your phone so they can’t track you. There’s a new one in my bag that’s all set up with everything you could need. Contacts for all the top pros, my family… m-my bank information. That’s signed over to your name, so you have access to it all. My passwords for different accounts are in there too in case you need ‘em.” His eyes opened slowly, clouded with some emotion that you couldn’t quite place. But you could see the tears in them, and your heart, or at least what was left of it, was stuck in your throat at the sight of them. You had only seen him look like that just a few times.

“Katsuki I-”

“Once you get somewhere safe contact Deku. Tell him what’s happened. B-be honest with him, ‘kay?” His words were quicker now, like he knew his time was near and he needed to get everything out. “He’s gonna be a fuckin’ wreck, but if you explain everything, and you tell him that this was m-my choice to let it happen, he’ll come around eventually. But I’m assuming they’re gonna come for him next, and I want him to be prepared. I’ve left videos for everyone important on that phone. Do me a favor and share ‘em with the people they’re meant for, ‘kay?”

“Of course I will, Kats. Anything for you,” your voice shook like the last leaves of the season in a cold winter wind.

Katsuki chuckled gently, letting the hand that caressed your face drop to entwine his fingers with your own. “It’s also got all our photos and videos on it too…” His voice was sad, with a hint of anger over the reality he was facing. “It’s got a-” A ragged cough burst from his lungs, accompanied by a light spray of blood that had you cringing. “Got a video on there f’r you too,” he rasped, determined to say what he needed to say even as his speech was strained, somewhat slurred. It cut you like a knife.

A fresh wave of tears spilled down your face, the crystalline droplets falling to your joined hands. “I’m just so fucking sorry Kats…” You tried to suppress your panic and sorrow, so as not to let him witness it in his final moments, but you realized that would be insincere, especially when you’d been hiding such a huge secret this whole time. So, you let any walls crumble in the looming shadow that was his imminent death.

“I know, sweet girl. So am I. Sorry I never got t’ marry you, never got t’ start a f-family, grow old, all that s-sappy shit…” The blood that had sprayed from his lungs now stained his lips, creeping between the cracks and providing the most color anywhere on his ashen face. “Most of all, ‘m sorry you were f-forced to do this. But y’know what ‘m not sorry for?”

You shook your head, wondering what on earth he could find positive in this situation.

“’m not sorry I met you… got to love you, got to have you in my life, even if just for a little while. L-like I said… y’r the best thing that’s ever happened to me. ‘nd I mean it. E-even if y’r the end of me, I’ll love you even from the grave.”

“Katsuki…” He struggled to bring your hand up and pressed his smiling lips to the back of it. “I love you too, so fucking much… I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry, I-”

You were cut off as he mustered what was left of his strength to lean forward and capture your lips in a gentle kiss. It tasted of blood and tears, defeat and anguish, but there was a sweetness to it as well. There was forgiveness and understanding and love that had you aching deep in your soul. As he broke off his head slumped forward, landing heavily on your shoulder as he took labored, uneven breaths.

“It’s alright, Y/N. I would have stopped ya if there was any other way…” His breath was hot against your skin, his grip on your hand limp. “It was m-my choice. Y’r worth it.”

“No, I’m not! You are so important to so many people, to all of Japan! You keep people safe, give them hope,” you sobbed, burying your face in his hair, and cradling him as close as possible, as he had done earlier. “I’m just some worthless orphan who only hurts people and brings people pain and suffering.”

His head shook minutely against your skin. “Not to me,” he breathed. “You’re m-my… my everything, got it? You better go on livin’ ‘kay? Otherwise ‘m gonna beat ya up in the afterlife. ‘Nd ya better not just live… Do something g-great. Go somewhere beautiful f’r me, yeah? Go on an adventure. Otherwise, I’ll haunt you.” He could hardly get the words out, but as he did you felt small pinpricks of heat on your exposed thighs. You didn’t need to look down to know it was his blood, vibrant and red as his eyes.

You nodded fervently, kissing whatever places on his face you could reach. “I will, I promise I will. And I’ll send the videos and warn Izuku and… and I’ll go somewhere b-beautiful. I just wish you could come with me.”

“I do too…”

There was a moment of silence between you that was filled with so much emotion it was nearly overwhelming. There was sadness most of all, under which brewed anger and resentment and regret. But there was also love, understanding, and what you could only describe as… hope. Hope for your future, hope that you could eventually find peace, or at least something close. That you would finally be able to live for yourself without having to go on killing and suffering at the hands of villains that only wanted to use you.

You lifted his head from your shoulder with a gentle hand and rested your forehead against his. “I love you, Bakugou Katsuki. More than anything.”

“And I love you too, Y/N. You’ve made my life worth living,” he whispered into the space between you. “Keep living, got it brat?”

“You got it, shithead,” you laughed weakly, before kissing him softly. You hoped to convey all of your love, passion, regret, and heartache through that final gesture. Yet all you felt in return was love, adoration even. It gave you hope that, despite the fact that you would never be quite the same, you may be able to find some modicum of peace in the future.

With a final wheezing breath, Katsuki broke away from the kiss, his body going limp and sagging against your own. His fingers were still entwined with your own, only his grip had gone slack. His skin was still damp and hot, but when you placed your fingers on the artery in his neck you only felt stillness. A lack of pulse.

Death.

You have no concept of how long you sat there weeping over his motionless body, holding him against your chest as you mourned him. Mourned the loss of the only person you’d ever loved. The stillness of his body against you was eerie. The lack of breath against your skin had you feeling cold, even as his own body lost its heat. His skin grew ghostly, and his limbs stiffened as you grieved.

It was really done. He was really dead.

It had been about 6 months since you had assassinated Bakugou Katsuki, and to say your life had changed would be a serious understatement.

Hiding the evidence hadn’t been difficult. You had spent the entirety of that night scouring and bleaching every possible surface of any biological evidence that you may have left behind, and you even destroyed the bed sheets and towels, replacing them with identical ones. Thankfully you and Katsuki had booked the place under aliases, knowing that there was certainly a chance of your vacation spot being leaked to the public had he used his real name.

Disposing of Katsuki, however, proved to be more of a challenge.

You ended up cremating him, figuring that would be the easiest way to lay him to rest while also minimizing your chances of his remains being found. After you had finished clearing the cabin of any evidence you packed the car with both of your belongings before carrying him out to the firepit by the river. You sat and watched as the flames consumed him, finding it the slightest bit poetic that such an explosive man would go out like this. By the time the sun rose, you were still sitting before the smoldering ashes, tears long since dried on your skin and limbs sore from how long you had sat still. The weight of him rested on your shoulders long after he had burned away, and you could still feel him there to this day.

You had gathered his ashes and scattered them in the river, allowing them to wash away before you returned to the car the two of you had rented. Taking one last look at the cabin, at the location where your heart and soul had gone to die, you had sent one final message to your boss before obliterating your phone:

[ It’s done. ]

You now found yourself in Greece, settled in a nice little villa situated on a mountain overlooking a turquoise sea. As you sat on your balcony the wind tugged at your hair, and you paused to take in the setting sun. The sky was a vibrant orange, the shade of which almost perfectly matched the color of the trademark “X” that had once adorned a certain Pro’s uniform.

You found him in everyday life, almost constantly reminded. When you woke to a cold bed at the start of a new day. As you watched children run through the streets on a warm summer evening with sparklers in hand. Sometimes you still found yourself cooking double portions of meals, tearily packing up the leftovers for later. When songs you used to dance to in your pajamas would play as you sat in a café, alone.

And that wasn’t even mentioning the phone. It contained every picture he had ever taken. Every selfie, every candid, every unflattering angle… And while there were plenty of the two of you, most of them were just you, taken from his perspective. They were moments that he had thought were worth capturing. Some were on dates, where you had put some effort into your appearance even if it was just a nice dinner together at home. But others you had no idea he had taken. Images of you asleep on his chest, doing your makeup, hard at work on your computer, and making a stern, concentrated face…

They were moments when he had found you beautiful, as he had told you in a letter you’d found in his notes app, where he had left you a plethora of love letters he had written to you over the time you had spent together.

You had also made sure to follow his final instructions and sent the videos to the proper recipients. As Katsuki had predicted, Deku had been an absolute mess when he had found out about the fate of his best friend. However, after watching the video Katsuki had made him, Midoriya had insisted he didn’t blame you. He had also sworn to find and defeat the group you had worked for, and with your assistance, he and the Hero Commission did just that. They brought down the entire organization, freeing you of the fear of being sucked back into their clutches, or being captured and tortured for trying to escape in the first place.

The one thing you hadn’t mustered was the courage to watch the video intended for you.

It sat untouched in the camera roll just waiting for you to gather the fortitude to see what he had to say to you. Out of respect for those which he had left other videos for, you hadn’t watched those either, so you really didn’t know what to expect. You only knew that when you finally hit play you were in for a world of emotion.

But tonight, you had finally convinced yourself to press the button. With a glass of his favorite wine in hand and the Dynamight plushie he had bought you almost a year ago hugged to your chest, you tried to prepare yourself for the torrent of feelings you were about to undergo. With your headphones on snuggly in order to immerse yourself in the presence of your lover and to minimize distractions, you started the video.

“Hey dumbass,” he started. The sound of his voice had you choking up already, but you didn’t want to cry yet, so you held back your emotion. “So, I’m guessing you probably waited a while to watch this, right? You were probably scared to because it would mean admitting to yourself that I’m gone. Well, I’m gonna say right now that I think that’s bullshit. I’m right here, idiot. I always will be. All of this shit is backed up on the cloud, so even if you lose this phone it’s all still gonna be there. Can’t get rid of me that easy.” His chuckle was laidback, almost carefree. As if he wasn’t recording a message to be watched after a death he knew was coming.

“I’m gonna be honest with you, it’s taken me a while to record this for you. I’ve already done everyone else’s because I had to really think about what to say to you, and I’m pretty sure this is attempt number eight? Maybe number nine… I don’t fuckin’ know. What I’m tryin’ to say is that I know you’re probably hurting the most out of everyone right now. Yeah, my family is probably crushed, and shitty Deku probably feels responsible or whatever… But you?” He paused, looking away from the camera for a moment in thought. You felt tears welling in your eyes as he continued somewhat carefully.

“You were the one who had to carry out your mission. And I just want you to know that, in a weird kinda way, I respect that. You had to do what you had to do. For the sake of yourself, and in a way… for my sake. They were probably planning on killing both of us if you didn’t do it on your own, right? And it would probably include a lot of pain and suffering, if all the intel we’ve gathered on these bastards is correct. They seem like real assholes, y’know?” You couldn’t help but smile gently at his words, as he didn’t even know how true they were at the time.

“But I don’t want you to blame yourself, got it? I obviously don’t know all the specifics of your situation, but I do know one thing. I know that you’re one of the most thoughtful, caring, and kind people I have ever met. And even if everything else has been part of an act, I don’t think those things can be faked.” There were those goddamn tears again. They began to blur your vision, and you took a moment to wipe them away before they could fall.

“I don’t think your love is fake either.” His voice was soft and seemed to be slightly strained. “Everything I feel from you in that respect seems… very genuine. At least I really fuckin’ hope it’s real. Because I know that everything I feel for you is as real as it gets. And I swear to god if you don’t actually love me back, even just a little, I’m gonna come back and haunt you from the dead, got it brat?” If you weren’t mistaken you thought you could see tears starting to form in his eyes even as you found yourself chuckling at his faux aggression.

“I just- I’m sorry that you have to do this… Heh, weird that I’m the one apologizing when you’re the one that has to fuckin’ kill me. But, while I plan on telling you this in person before it happens, and I’m pretty sure I know when it’s gonna be happening…” He paused and took a deep, stabilizing breath before trucking on.

“I would do anything to protect you, Y/N. I would go to war, stop a train, take a bullet straight to the heart… I am willing to die for you if it means you won't have to deal with those scumbags anymore. I’m hoping that after this all goes down and I’m dead and gone you’ll be able to escape them. I’m putting together a contingency plan, hence all the videos and shit. I want you to be able to live for yourself, finally, instead of having to live your life as a criminal, constantly putting yourself in danger and having to do what those assholes want you to do.”

You took a breath as he paused again, reaching up to scrub at his eyes, which had steadily been growing red with impending tears. “I honestly don't know what else to say, but I don’t want to end this yet…” He chuckled somewhat ruefully, his brows coming together in a look of what you could only describe as defeat.

“I guess I should say that I was uh… I was planning to propose in a couple months. I don’t want to make you hurt worse than you probably already are, but I don’t want to hide that. I’m probably not going to before it all goes down, but I uh, I kinda bought a ring and everything. I gave it to my ma and told her not to give it to you till you asked for it. I figured you might not want it, so I didn’t wanna tell you about it. Guess I wanted to wait till you watched this, so you’d get the full picture on where I stand with the whole situation. If you want the ring, just tell her you watched this and decided to get it. But I understand if it would be too painful to have a reminder of me sitting on your finger every day… A reminder of everything that happened…”

Your hand came up to cover your mouth as you paused the video. You needed to take a moment to process what he was saying. He was going to propose? He had already bought the ring? Tears were flowing down your cheeks freely now, and your heart felt so heavy it seemed like you had a sandbag on your chest. You had thought about what it would be like to marry him, sure, but you had never allowed yourself to seriously entertain the idea as it was too painful to imagine such a thing while knowing what you’d eventually have to do to him. Hitting play, you resumed the video.

“Just know it’s there if you want it. Guess it could be a reminder of my love for you. Of how much I truly care for you. I just need you to get it through your thick skull that I really do love you. Even if it was all for the sake of a mission, which I kinda refuse to believe, what I feel for you is, and always will be, real. Even after I’m dead I’ll still love you.”

As the timer on the bottom of the video steadily scrolled toward the end you could see a few tears falling down his cheeks as he chose to forgo wiping them away. “Well, uh, I guess that’s pretty much all I had to say then. You better not be curled up in a ball somewhere dark and dingey wasting away and letting your sadness eat you alive, dumbass. I want you to go out there and take life by the fuckin’ balls. You deserve to live for yourself from now on. I probably told you this before I left you, but all of my bank accounts have been signed over to you, so hopefully, money won’t be a problem for the rest of your life. For fuck’s sake, I don’t even know why I get paid so much, but I have literally no clue what to do with it all, so it should at least get you pretty far. Do something fun. Travel the world. Go on an adventure and do something you’ve always wanted to do, ‘kay?”

He had indeed signed over all of his accounts to you, and when you accessed them for the first time the numbers you found sent your head spinning. He also had copious amounts of money invested in numerous companies, so the numbers kept increasing over time as well. When you had gone over it all with a financial advisor, she had instructed you on how to keep everything in order and how to properly invest in the future, if you so desired.

“I just ask that you take care of my family if they ever need it,” he pleaded gently. His eyes had softened as he brought up his loved ones. “I’ve already left ‘em a buncha money, which is probably surprising considering the huge amount you hopefully have already found in the accounts I signed over to you, but like I said the Commission pays me a disgusting amount. It’s honestly kinda ridiculous… all of that money could be going to something much better, but I digress… If they ever need something, promise me you’ll help ‘em out, alright? They’re probably fuckin’ wrecks over the fact that I’m gone, and while I’ve explained everything in their video, they may appreciate it coming from you as well. I just hope you guys can come to terms with each other. Because as you know my ma can be… a lot,” he chuckled sadly.

“Just know I love the fuck outta you, and I’m so proud of you for having to get through all the bullshit you’ve been through. I’m not mad about the situation, and I hope you understand that. But I am pretty sad that it’s gotta go down like this, and that I’ll never get to grow old with you like I’d originally planned. But, like I’ve said over and over at this point, I’d gladly die if it meant saving you, and hopefully freeing you from these villain bastards making you do all this shit.

I hope you don’t miss me too much, and I don’t want you to be afraid of finding someone else to love. I just want you to be happy, and if that means finding someone new then I support you. Just make sure they deserve you, because you’ve got so much to give, and I don’t want you wasting your time with some fuckin’ loser. But if you don’t end up with anyone else, please… just don’t let yourself fade away. Find at least one thing to give you happiness. Because you fuckin’ deserve it, idiot. This isn’t your fault, and I don’t want you blaming yourself. Also, make sure to kick those shitheads’ asses for me, alright? Lock ‘em up in Tartarus for all eternity. That’s what they fuckin’ deserve for making you do all the shit they did.”

He looked down at his hands, fiddling with them off-screen as he thought for a moment before looking back up at you. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Y/N. You changed my life for the better, taught me what love was all about, and showed me more love and kindness than anyone else. I refuse to believe that was all an act. It sure as hell wasn’t an act on my end. And if it was real for you too, if all of this was as real for you as it was for me, then I hope you know that you held my heart in your hands and I will love you till you are dead and gone like me. And I ain’t got a clue what comes after life, but I’ll sure as hell be waitin’ for you on the other side. I promise.”

There were tears in his eyes yet again, glittering like diamonds as they wavered on his lower lashes. Your stomach clenched at the sight as you reached up to brush away your own.

“Alright, fuckin’ dumbass. Get off your phone and go live your life. I hope you’re somewhere beautiful. Somewhere as beautiful as you are. The world is a better place because you’re in it. Or… at least my world was better because of you.” The tears quivered once more before slipping down his cheeks as he gave you a sad smile from his place in the past. “Live enough for both of us, yeah? And don’t join me too soon, otherwise, I’ll be pissed. I don’t wanna see your face wherever I am for another 50 years, you little fucker.”

“You got it, Kats,” you laughed tearily, unable to stop your response from slipping from your lips as if he was really standing right in front of you.

“Think ‘m just rambling at this point, ‘cus I really don’t want this to end. But I guess I’ve gotta save some space on here for everything else I wanna leave for ya. One last time, I love you, princess. I always will. Live a good rest of your life, and don’t come lookin’ for me till the time is right.” He raised his hand and gave a small wave.

“Goodbye.”

#bakugo katsuki #bakugou katsuki #bakugou smut #bakugo smut #bakugou x reader #bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #bakugou angst #bakugo angst #bakugou fluff #bakugo fluff #bakugou fanfiction #bakugo fanfiction #cel writes #i hope this killed you as much as it killed me #songfic #bakugou songfic #bakugo songfic

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viviswtings · 2 years ago

Text

He's a dick.

(Part 2 of Alcohol Wet)

Words: 1975.

Warnings: I think none? Like, bad words? (It's literally the Sullys like my girl Kiri was screaming "Penis Face" at like four years old). Angst but not major. Like "heartbreak" angst but not bad ending. Not good either. Not proofread and English isn't my first language.

Notes: Uhm... So, yeah. This is gonna take longer than expected. But I'm pretty sure it won't take more than three parts. I just wanted to put this out there already because I'm such a slow writer and my life's worth of trauma is like taking over again after literally seven years... So idk how long part three will take. (There'll be some spice, for those patient enough). I'm so sorry if it's not up to what you expected.

Tuk was holding the arrow with her two fingers, bow pulled almost tight enough.

He tapped her elbow, so she’d raise it a bit more. Now the bow was perfectly tense. He put his hand under her stretched arm, for her aim was perfect.

“Shoot”. The arrow made a hissing sound as it flew, thudding against the bark of the target. His sister sighed in content and he smiled up at her. “Attagirl”

He got up, patting her head while sporting the proudest smile. Being a teacher wasn’t the first thing that came to his mind when he thought about learning how to lead the clan. But his father had proved, once again, that he knew what he was doing when he instructed him to teach the young hunters. They had his hand full at all times.

Tuk smiled and pointed at the target, laughing. She wasn’t looking his way anymore. Instead, her focus seemed to be way behind him.

“Sänume!” The young girl smiled so brightly it was almost blinding.

But not as blinding as the woman approaching them. She carried a basket against her hip, while her long loincloth rested just on the dip of her waist, showing off the curves of her upper thighs as her neckpiece made a clinking noise when she moved. Towards them. She was moving towards them.

“I see, Tukie” She answered his sister with a smile that could be even heard in her voice “That’s why you didn’t show up today. I was worried”.

“I was with my brother” The little one confessed, almost immediately. At twelve years of age, Tuktirey kept being the sweetest girl in High Camp. At least to her brother’s eyes.

“Sorry for keeping her from class”. He chimed in. “My mother said I could take her for an excursion and I took the chance”.

“It’s quite alright. I was actually going to take these to your mother” She pointed to the basket against her hip, full of fruit, her smile never faltering. But, for a moment, Neteyam thought it was weird her eyes weren’t on him while they talked. “I hope she’s doing alright”

“It’s getting harder to move, but she’s healthy” He answered, getting closer to her so he may take the basket. It looked heavy.

She took a step back and her eyes wandered. The woman was absolutely avoiding him. And the stinging feeling the realisation left behind almost had him wincing. Like a needle had stung his skin and now he felt the need to rub his hand against the spot to soothe it.

“I’ll get to her, then” The young woman looked down at her feet, toes curling and weight shifting from one foot to the other “I’m sure she’ll need some help”.

Neteyam nodded, not knowing what else to say. He wanted to ask her what he had done. What had make her so angry that she couldn’t even look at his face. He hadn’t seen her in days, and now that he was finally back she was keeping those sweet eyes of hers from him.

“She’ll appreciate it” He almost whispered, afraid his voice would break if he was any louder.

A nod. That’s all she gave before stepping away from him and next to Tuk, kissing the top of her head bending just slightly, while his sister held onto her waist for a hug. What wouldn’t he do for her to forgive whatever he had done, let alone hold her waist in his hands?

Her whole chest felt like it was crushing down. Her ribs hurt when she tried to breathe and her throat had closed on her once she stepped away from him, ears low and tail almost touching the floor.

The young man had been out on a mission for his father alongside the whole party of warriors he had been leading for months. The olo’eyktan had to stay behind, too preoccupied with his pregnant mate to even think about parting from her.

She saw him before he left. Had expected for him to say something, anything. But he didn’t. He was his usual self, lovely as always, and with that assured smile and sly looks of his, she lacked the courage to even ask if he remembered anything at all about the previous night.

After he came back, triumphant and proud, all pumped up and as handsome as she had ever seen him, he had approached her with the brightest smile, his four canines showing in the aloofest way. Her heart betrayed her as she laughed with him, letting him grab her by the forearms as his touch left goosebumps in their wake. Maybe he’d tell her that night, during the feast. Or so she hoped.

He didn’t show up. And the next morning he didn’t show his face either.

Was he avoiding her? She’d much rather believe he simply couldn’t recall what happened between them.

If he did, five days had passed since then and he hadn’t uttered a word. It had costed her restless nights, crying her heart out in her little hut in the back of High Camp, wails so desperate the woman who lived closest had brought her herbs to make infusions so her heart would heal.

Why would he care about her? She was a teacher for a lack of something more useful she could do. She couldn’t hunt, couldn’t dance, couldn’t weave nor carve and having her attending to the fire with the elderly was almost an insult to them.

She broke down, crouching as she left the basket of fruit beside her on the floor. Her insides hurt, she felt ill. Why had she believed him? He had been so sweet, his kiss so warm and the words he spoke disarming her. Now she felt like she had given all she was to him and he had tossed her aside, not even acknowledging her.

Soon a pair of hands cradled her, long, slim arms wrapping around her, smell so familiar she couldn’t help but cry harder into her shoulder.

Kiri was so kind, she didn’t even ask what bothered her so deeply, so desperately she was weeping just a few feet away from her family home. But she didn’t mind, helping her stand and taking the basket, dismissing her refusal to step inside with her, face congested and skin burning.

When she finally convinced her, she left her resting next to the fire, grabbing everything she needed to make something that would calm her down and make her feel better. Her mother had heard too, so she was making some for her aching back as well.

Neytiri had asked for the girl to sit by her side, taken a look at the fruit she brought and given her most sincere thanks. She would lie if she said she wasn’t worried about her. Her hormones were raging, and all she wanted to do was cry with her.

“Sweet girl” She spoke softly, taking her hand in hers. “What makes you so upset?”

The look in her eyes almost broke her. The mother felt tears burn her eyes as she held her hand against her mouth, trying as best she could to keep her composure. The kid didn’t need for her to break down as well.

“I don’t want to bother you” The girl answered, and the sorrow was laced within her voice. Neytiri knew sorrow like no other, and she couldn’t help but wonder what could make a perfectly happy young girl cry like that.

Deep down she knew. Not many things make a woman sorrowful as love. Love for her parents, her siblings, her children, her home… her mate. Thankfully, Jake had never caused her such sorrow, and looking at the kid in front of her she was once more thankful for the gift The Great Mother had bestowed upon her all those years ago.

“You can speak” She assured her. “It’s just us in here, Jake and my sons left early today and they won’t be back for a while”

But she wouldn’t speak. Whatever plagued her mind being too embarrassing for her to say out loud. As Tsahik, most women confided in her, and she was grateful for their trust. “I will never tell, sweet child. Whatever burdens you, you may share it with me and maybe seek comfort in The Mother”.

“She means it’s just us girls” Kiri hadn’t made a noise, startling her when she put the bowls of tea down on the floor in front of them. “So we won’t tell on you”.

The thought was tempting. Telling them what made her cry at night and mindlessly go through her days. But they’d probably think she was being dramatic. Maybe she needed to hear exactly that. How dramatic she was being and how unimportant her feelings were compared to everything else going on.

She needed a good reality check.

So she told them. About the night, the liquor and the touches. She got carried away talking about how kissed her. “He said then I’d be his”. She admitted, looking down at the cold tea in her hands. “Claimed he was mine already. I thought he meant it. I believed he’d ask me for us to, maybe, perhaps… mate”. Her voice was barely above a whisper as she finished, sniffling as her fingers turned white against the bowl.

“He’s a dick”. Kiri concluded, brow furrowed and an angry look in her face. “You don’t just get someone’s hopes up like that and then leave them hanging. Fucking asshole”.

Neytiri looked at her daughter, her lips in a thin line and overall expression stern. She didn’t know what to tell the poor girl. Had it been her, she’d be in her same situation. “He probably doesn’t remember” She tried her best to sound reassuring. “It’ll fix itself, the whole thing. Sooner than you think, believe me”.

She didn’t. By the look on her glassy eyes she didn’t believe a single word that left her mouth. But Neytiri did not lie. She hadn’t said it out of pity and not meant it. She wouldn’t do such a thing to an aching soul.

“Now…” She tried to get comfortable, her swollen belly making her whole body ache. When she found the right position, she felt the angry kicks inside her, so she had to reposition herself on the pillows.

Soon, big, hardened hands helped her up gently, moving her so she’d lay over the cushions comfortably. She couldn’t help the smile as she thanked the handsome man beside her, who squeezed her shoulders affectionately.

“Kiri, why don’t you take her home” Jake spoke softly, making sure he didn’t disturb the calm that had settled on them. “It’s getting late, resting will do you good, kid. You look like you’ve had it rough”

He settled behind her, letting Neytiri rest her back against him as Kiri nodded and helped the girl get up. They both said their goodbyes sweetly and left. What a good kid. Her Jake’s decision to make her the children’s caretaker had been a good one. Someone with such a tender heart must’ve made the children feel very well loved.

“She meant your son” She finally said when the girls were far enough.

“So he’s my son when he fucks up”. The rumbling in his chest made her laugh, slapping his thigh softly. “Should I talk to him?”

“No” She rested her hand right where it was, caressing the skin absentmindedly now. “No, he’s a man. Let him fix his own mistakes”

“Poor kid if she has to wait ‘til then” She felt Jake shake his head. “Boy’s a knucklehead”

They remained silent after that, at least for a while. Neytiri was already dozing off when her mate spoke.

“But he does care. So he better hurry his blue ass and make things right”

She chuckled softly before closing her eyes.

Taglist: @littlexscarletxwitchh @parrotpeggyy @gabrijelasworld @iwanttohitmyself @syulangg @lovekeeho @sharkybabe9 @hislaevv @who-is-ej @randxmthxughts

#netyam sully #neteyam #neteyam x reader #neteyam x oc #neteyam x y/n #adult neteyam #jake x neytiri #adult netyam #avatar the way of water #atwow #i'm so sorry if it's not what you were all expecting #it's not what i expected either

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afreakingdork · 7 months ago

Note

This is a bit embarrassing to admit and I’ve been putting off sending an ask for weeks, but seeing as Weak Spot is almost complete I figured it’s now or never; I daydream about the world you’ve created all the time, it’s like my go-to happy place in my head. Before I say anything I just wanna make sure you know I’m not asking you to write this, Weak Spot is your story and I already know what you have planned will make me weep on another Saturday morning. I just really want to share my thoughts because your story has been living in my head rent free like ever since I binge read 1-39 in one weekend. Do you think it’s possible that Donnie and Chester will ever meet again? I’ve been imagining what a wedding chapter might be like since 45 and my favourite ‘what if;’ I’ve come up with is what if Y/N were to send an invitation to Chester? I think I just really want Chester to see how much Donnie has grown and give him that ✨approval of a parental figure✨ he so craves. Perhaps the invitation being instrumented exclusively on Y/N’s behalf as a surprise for Don? I really wanna know what you might think 人´∀｀)

Oh gosh, no need to be embarrassed because I do the same thing! It's literally how I come up with all my little ideas! I really appreciate you sharing this and I'm proud of you for being brave to do so.

Narratively, it doesn't make sense for Donnie to meet Chester again sadly. Sometimes you bounce of people in your life and the interactions don't go the way you want. That doesn't mean that because you had to part ways that they weren't important. Sometimes those people you meet in blips are the most important of all (exactly why Sandwich Spot exists, but outside the main story because while it helps point the exact moment Donnie realized life existed outside of himself, it's not something reader will ever know firsthand, but they do know it because it shaped how Donnie is now).

So Donnie will never see Chester again, but that being said... I couldn't help but be inspired by what you wrote. so please, have this gift...

A moment in time in the not so far flung future that may or may not happen in Soft Spot:

He was getting too old for this.

"Come now! Violet can walk herself." Chester urged.

Or Harry had a point.

"But, pop-pop! She's so slow!" Jade whined where she was pulling her little sister.

Those morning swim classes were looking more and more appealing.

Violet pulled back on the arm that was wrenched in her sister's grasp.

Harry had been more spry since he started attending.

"What was it you were teaching me about sayings?" Chester tried a new tactic.

Meanwhile, Chester had only gotten lazier in retirement.

"Oh!" Jade lit up and let go to think with her entire body. "Let's see..."

His chair sat him so well, though.

Violet righted herself from where she toppled over and took a breath.

He'd always thought with his first grandchild getting older, he'd have to do less lifting.

"It's the one about the cow!" Jade hopped.

With the second, however, it had doubled his required strength.

"Close... How about another animal?" Chester smiled.

He wouldn't trade them for the world though.

This time recognition came to Jade with a slow glow. "You lead a horse to water..."

What a happy life he had the honor of living.

"But..." Chester nodded for her to continue.

Violet got herself onto her two feet and took a few shuffling steps toward him.

He prepared for that weight on his hips and held his hands out ready for her.

"You can't make him drink..." Jade curled a finger to her lips. "So with Vi...?"

With a grunt and groan, Chester got Violet up in his arms.

The little one curled against him, fatigued.

The park was a big, exciting world for a toddler.

"It means..." Chester paused in case Jade wanted to come to the conclusion herself.

Instead, her eyes shined as she stared up at him, ready for the answer.

"You can do everything in your power to help someone, but you can't force them to accept it." He explained.

Jade took a few steps toward him and pondered so hard it made her forehead scrunch up.

She was adorable.

A huge stock of black fabric passed by like a moving obelisk.

It pulled Chester's eye where he readjusted Violet's load.

It wasn't an inanimate object, but a long black coat.

It donned a very tall man who moved to the other side of the playground.

There, he found a spot to stop and in a turn revealed a blotch of green.

Topped with a shock of rich purple.

Eyes wide and free hand suddenly flapping anxiously for Jade's, Chester felt himself pale.

Donatello.

He hadn't seen the boy in years.

After the first few, Chester had been left to hope that Donatello had only taken his advice.

Despite the bitter end, he wished him nothing, but the best.

Donatello spoke.

Too far away and with a bustling park between them, there was no way Chester could hear.

What he could do was look down.

Where a joyful, albeit tired looking counterpart animatedly responded.

Chester's lips parted.

The second person then looked down before offering something up.

A small bundle whose lavender blanket wriggled to reveal another, much, much smaller green mutant.

Donatello took the baby and brought the child up to his face to coo something.

The older mutant's eyes gleamed.

Chester knew that look.

The one that topped eye bags as deep as canyons.

It was one he once sported.

It was the one his son-in-law now wore.

It was the look of a new father.

The way they looked at their own.

Donatello had a partner.

Donatello had a child.

"What's wrong, pop-pop?" Jade's voice broke in, thunderous amongst the many others.

Chester looked down and felt the tears streaking his cheeks.

He only gave a bright smile and continued to hold his hand out.

Jade took it and continued to stare up at him. "Are you hungry? Vi cries when she's hungry. Let's get you some lunch!"

Chester nodded and moved to leave the park with Jade in tow. "That sounds wonderful."

#ask #weakspotfic

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wonijinjin · 1 year ago

Text

hot and cold

author’s note: this fic is part of the 200 followers event, requested by my lovely @welcometomyoasis go check it out and request something! ps: the first snow just fell so this is perfect timing hehe

synopsis: when you are freezing in winter joshua has his ways of warming up your heart.

word count: 0.5k | genre: fluff, suggestive | warning: joshua x gn! reader | warnings: a bit suggestive, but nothing really bold

“it is so cold shua! why on earth would we go outside in this cold weather?” you whined to your boyfriend while walking in the park; the first snow had just fallen, and joshua thought it would be a great idea to go on a walk while watching the white scenery. “oh don’t be like this darling! i know the temperature is below your liking, but i can always lend you my gloves if you would like.” he said while turning to you, his orbs shining even brighter because of the snow’s glow. he took notice of your shivering and wrapped his bigger form around yours. “that would actually be great since i am clearly freezing here.” you mumbled into his chest, soon hearing the vibrations of his laugh bubbling in his throat. he pulled away for a minute, taking his gloves off his big hands, handing it to you, but not before taking your hand in his, blowing hot air on it. “wow, you weren’t kidding when you said your hands were ice cold darling.” he said, surprised, his doe eyes going wider and wider. “i told you so, mister!” you giggled while he kissed your hand. he put his big mittens on your tiny hands, securing it nicely around the skin. “that’s it, all nice and warm now, isn’t it darling?” he grinned, leaning in to press a kiss onto the tip of your nose. “your hands are so big, shua! these are literally gigantic on me.” you giggled while joshua put his hand to yours, comparing them. “i need them to be big to be able to cup your cheeks easily when i do this.” he said, leaning in to kiss you slowly, the cold disappearing from your body after being heated up by his lips. his large form trapped you in between his legs, grabbing your waist by the belt of your fluffy coat. “actually if you feel like you are still cold i think i have a solution for that.” he smirked against your lips when the two of you broke apart to breathe. “really? what is it, handsome?” you looked up at him, waiting for his reply. “i think we may need to take this back to our house darling” he gave you a kiss “because i think” he kissed you again “that we’d both warm up faster if we took off our clothes.” he whispered into your ear, nibbing on the shell of it. “fuck off, joshua hong! how dare you say this here in public?” you laughed while pushing him away, smacking his chest jokingly. “okay, okay i will shut up for now.” he said, putting up his hands in the air in a defensive attempt. he held out his hand for you to take, which you did; he spun you around and landed you in his arms again. he kissed under your jawline, where the scarf was not covering yor sensitive neck, his breath hot on your skin. “but you might rethink this when we get home, darling.”

#wonijinjin #caratsland #seventeen imagines #seventeen #seventeen scenarios #svt imagines #seventeen fluff #fluff #svt joshua #joshua x reader #seventeen joshua #joshua hong #joshua #joshua x you #joshua x y/n #winter #suggestive

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deathofacupid · 7 months ago

Text

family | tom holland

a/n: erm idk how i feel abt this one there's like no active plot- wrote this a while back um i might take it down

summary: for the first time, tom meets your family.

warnings: cursing, mentions of sex, indian aunties

pairing: indian!fem!reader x tom holland

word count: 2.2k+ words

you shuffled through some more of your makeup, touching up your hair at the same time. diwali was held annually at your parents' home, where many relatives would take time off to see each other. during diwali, people would wear their finest clothes, illuminate the interior and exterior of their homes with saaki (earthen lamp), diyas (candles) and rangoli, perform worship ceremonies of Lakshmi, the goddess of prosperity and wealth, light fireworks, and partake in family feasts, where mithai (sweets) and gifts are shared.

it was also the first time that tom would be attending with you, which may have been the reason you were nervous. every since a young age, your parents had kind of expected you to marry someone of your own nationality.

after all, your two sisters did that, as well as your brother. your parents had met tom a couple times, but seeing as he was busy filming, they hadn't gotten to know him that well, despite the fact it was almost a year that the two of you were together.

you stepped out of the bathroom, picking up your dress slightly to keep you from tripping. pulling open a draw in the cabinet, you picked up a nice kurta set for tom, one that you'd gotten him last week. it was a pretty navy blue, one you knew would complement his warm eyes.

"oh, hey, love, you all ready?"

you couldn't help but nod shyly, most of your attire consisted of sweatpants, so him seeing you dressed up made you blush a little.

"you look really pretty, y/n," he kissed your cheek. "i love the traditional look on you."

"thanks, tommy. now go put this on, i don't wanna be late. can't make a bad impression, now can we?"

he rolled his eyes playfully and took the items from you, before changing. in front of you, making you blush a bright red.

"what, darling? we literally have sex all the time," tom snickered.

"yes, yes, i-i know. shut up and hurry," you said, getting over your embarrassment and shamelessly checking him out.

"you're not very subtle."

"i don't need to be. we're dating, 'member? you're my boyfrienddd. and we have 'sex all the time,'" you mimicked. not giving him time to respond, you walked over to him, making sure it fit right. "this isn't tight or anything?"

damn, was he hot in that.

"nope. snug as a bug in a rug," and you couldn't help but snort at his childishness and the silly rhyme.

"cool, now say 'croissant.'"

"ouch, babe. so mean."

"mhm," you kissed him, and he caught you off guard, his tongue slipping in your mouth. it got slightly heated before you pushed him away, remembering you had things to do.

"woah, there, keep your dick in your pants just a little while longer."

"nooooooo," tom drawled, groaning teasingly.

"i didn't take all this time getting ready for you to wreck it in five minutes. you wouldn't believe how difficult it was to get this dress on."

"i bet it'll be easier to take off," he wiggled his brows suggestively.

"you can test that out once we get back home."

he helped you downstairs and to the car, as you terribly struggled to walk in the heels. after sitting you in the car, he got in himself.

"okay, tommy, when we get there," you spoke as he turned on the engine, "don't drink, they'll ask you if you want vodka and you refuse, cause it's a trick, got that? and, um... stay away from my aunts, well, actually, greet them, but not too much. because if you start talking with them, they'll make you spill things you wouldn't have said otherwise, it's kinda manipulative, but... in a good way. ooh! be funny, but not too funny, because then they'll think you're too funny, and we don't want that. and don't curse too much, they don't like that. but don't be uptight, y'know?"

"wow, okay, first off, angel, breathe. why are you stressing out so much? it's just your family, right? i've met them before."

"this is different, though. because it's diwali. and before it was just casual, and it wasn't for long. plus, that was just my parents. this is everyone. why aren't you panicking? you went crazy the first time you were about to meet them."

"'cuz if i panic while you're panicking, we'll be a huge panicky mess. only one of us can panic at a time. that's the rule."

you laughed.

"besides, they'll love me," he started as he looked over to you at the red light, "i know you do," tom murmured, leaning in.

"the light's green."

"aw, come on, y/n, you totally ruined the moment!"

"it would have been ruined anyways, angry drivers honking at us isn't exactly romantic, babes."

"yeah, yeah."

soon enough, with some giggling and talking, time went by and you reached. getting out of the car, you straightened up and smoothed your hair. "tommy?" you asked, glanced at him as you stood in front of the front door.

"yes, my love?"

"my family, they, um, they can be a lot, okay? they want what's best for me, they just don't know that it's you," he took your hands in his and opened his mouth to say something, but you interrupted him. "promise me something," you murmured.

"yeah?"

"they aren't going to break us apart. because i love you so, so, so, so, so much, and you mean the world to me."

"well, darling, you are my world, and i solemnly swear," he put one of your hands on his heart playfully, "that they won't break us apart. nothing will. and i love you, too," he leaned in to kiss you, but you heard laughing and shrieking inside as the door opened. it was your niece, raja, or your sister priya's son. he was 8 and the most chaotic gremlin you knew, aside from tom.

"ewwwwwwwwww! they were kissing!"

we weren't kissing, but we would have gotten around to it if you hadn't interrupted, butthole.

tom leaned down to greet the kid, ruffled his hair slightly. "hi, raja, i'm peter," he said, changing his accent. you were slightly surprised that he remembered, last night you'd showed him pictures of your entire family, explaining who was who (you had a big family).

"spider-man!"

"shhhhh, you can't tell anyone! or the bad guys will get us!" raja giggled, and you gently moved him to the side, kissing the little boy's hair. it was the sweetest thing ever, seeing tom interact with the kid that way, and it made your love and admiration for him grow.

"amma! we're here!" your mom and dad greeted you by the door, and you bent down to touch your mother's feet, before realizing that you didn't share this detail with tom. but as you looked over, he was doing the same, and you wondered how he'd known. you did the same to do your father and he did the same to your mother.

your mom looked over to your dad, clearly impressed.

"hi, beta. andar aa jaa. sab aa gae, tum-he aakhiree ho. (come inside. everyone is here, you are the last.)" she gave you a kiss on the side of your head and you moved over to hug your dad as well. "hi, tom," she smiled.

"h-hello," he stammered as your mother gave him a hug, and visibly, he was surprised. you held in a snicker. tom moved over to shake your dad's hand, and the older man inspected him before giving a curt nod and smile.

you took his hand and squeezed it gently, kissing him on his cheek to calm him down slightly.

"there you are," your sister beamed, "didn't know if you and your hotshot boyfriend would show."

you rolled your eyes and gave her a hug. "love you, too," pausing momentarily, "tom this is d-"

"dia," he smiled, "it's nice to meet you. i've heard a lot." dia was your younger sister, age 23, she'd found the one last year and gotten married to him just 8 months later.

"all good things, i hope?"

"mostly," you chimed in.

a man appeared next to dia and you hugged him briefly, too. (there was a lotta hugging.)

"hey, tom, i'm prakash. nice to finally meet you. big fan, by the way."

you felt a need to interrupt, "me too. he's my celebrity crush."

tom rolled his eyes playfully, adding, "i better be. and it's nice to meet you, too, mate."

the four of you sat down on the couch, joining everyone else.

"priya," your older sister introduced, grinning. "raja's mom. and this is aditeya, my husband." adi leaned over to shake his hand and tom greeted him verbally as well.

"siddhant, my younger brother, but everyone calls him sid." not to mention, very overprotective. (and your favorite sibling.)

sid gave him a once-over and reluctantly reached over for a handshake. "hey, thomas," he nodded, unamused.

"relax," you mouthed, "he's just protective."

you went on to introduce him to all your aunts and uncles, and then finally, have some snacks.

"we adjusted the spice level," priya said.

"and there's milk," you added.

"nah, don't worry, i love spicy food," he waved his hand nonchalantly.

you resisted the urge to roll your eyes, considering that he couldn't eat any indian food you made, you always had to lessen the spices for him, but it made a funny first date, for you, at least.

he took a bite of the samosa andhis eyes widened as he swallowed it down. 16 pairs of eyes looked at him expectantly, waiting for a reaction."

"i-it's very good," he choked out.

"babes, you want milk?" you asked, knowing very well that he did.

tom forced a smile, "no, no, i'm good."

"okay..." you drawled. "enjoy then!" then you took a bite and beamed.

"i'm thirsty," you declared, to anyone willing to listen. then you stood up and strode into the kitchen, grabbing the milk from the fridge.

"you like him?"

you yelped and whipped around, seeing that it was just sid.

"shit, bro, you scared me! what the hell?"

"tom. you like him?"

"well, duh, why else would i be dating him?"

"how serious are you?"

"what is this? 20 questions?"

"just answer," he insisted.

"siddie, you don't need to worry," you said, knowing the childhood nickname would soften him up.

"i know, but-"

"no, look, trust me, he's... i think he's the one. he's been there for me like no one has. tom's so different, and not just a brainless actor. i know he'll keep me happy, and i also know that to him, i come before acting. he's made that a priority and showed that to me."

"i- okay. i trust you. and i'm happy for you," he leaned on for a hug, and once you broke apart, you poured the milk into the cup.

"who's that for?" sid asked. "you? did you think it was spicy?"

"no," you snorted, "it's for tom. he just won't admit he needs it." you walked walked out of the kitchen and back into the living room, taking back your seat. you set the milk in front of you, taking a sip first.

the second you put it down, he grabbed it and chugged the glass, resulting in some stares and odd looks casted toward him.

"i- uh, i really, really love milk," he blushed.

"definitely breastfed," your mom said.

"is he really the one if he can't even handle the samosa?" one of your aunts chimed in.

someone got to it before you did, another aunt, "shut it, rashmi. always talking."

"oi, chup, (shush.) i'm looking out for the girl."

"how about you look out for yourself? oh, wait, you already did. and see how that went with akash?"

they went back and forth bickering, but you smiled, considering this as a win. who cared about what they thought? their judgement? yes, they were a lot and they were your family, but tom was, too.

you loved your overbearing family, and you loved tom.

#tom holland x reader #tom holland #fluff #tom holland x you #desi tumblr #desi reader #desi representation #tom holland x indian!reader

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bubuslutty · 1 year ago

Text

Day 7: pretty in a skirt

pairing: demon/angel!fem reader x soap + soap x ghost

word count: 3.4k

tags: making out, blowjobs, dry humping, cross dressing, proof read by me so sorry for any mistakes

warnings: none

summary: Angel finally gets her hands on soap, literally.

a/n: enjoy and don't forget to share your thoughts if you've enjoyed a particular part 💙

It was Wednesday, 14:45 to be exact, and Johnny was nervous.

It has been a while since he hung out with a girl, or a boy alone (that isn't Simon or his other guys) for that matter. What would they even do? Chat and drink? She did say she was not planning to get drunk over text a couple of days earlier. And would they fuck? Does she even want to fuck him?

“Johnny,” A deep voice snapped Johnny out of his trance, his hands clutching a pack of Oreos while a bag of snacks was sitting in front of him on the counter.

“Hm?” He blinked and looked at Ghost who was leaning against the fridge, arms crossed and mask scrunched up on his nose bridge, a cigarette held between two pink lips.

“You’re nervous.” Ghost stated, staring at the man without blinking with those pale blue eyes of his.

“And why are you smoking inside the house?” Soap sighed, shoving the Oreos pack in the plastic bag and taking two big steps towards his Lieutenant, removing the cigarette from his lips and placing a kiss on them instead.

“You only smoke when you’re anxious or really annoyed.” Soap raised a brow after taking a puff, and blowing the smoke to the side, staring at Ghost straight in the eyes.

“I’m not.” Ghost shrugged, staring at Soap’s lips without blinking.

“Shitty liar, Lt. Shitty liar you are.” Soap sighed and handed the man back his cigarette.

“I don’t know, maybe I’m just a bit nervous because what if she’s a better fuck than I am?” Ghost slowly said, getting off the fridge to stand closer to Soap, breathing in his cologne.

Soap snorted, feeling a twinge of arousal deep in his guts, “Seriously, Simon? I dinnae even know if that’s what’s going to happen in the first place. And I doubt she has a bigger dick than you, so yeah, probably not.”

Ghost raised a brow, “Is that right? You can go around and shag anyone you want, Johnny, but at the end of the day, you come right back to me, yeah?"

“Always, Lt.” Soap breathed out, feeling his throat dry out and his dick harden in his trousers.

“Open your mouth then.” Ghost ordered and Soap let his mouth fall open, sticking out his tongue. Ghost brought the cigarette to his lips and took a puff, then grabbed Soap’s neck with his other hand, then leaned down and blew the smoke straight in Soap’s mouth and before Soap could make any sound (like moan like a total whore, but honestly same.), he smashed their lips together and kissed Soap like he was trying to suck his soul out through mouth.

Ghost is such a fucking dickhead, like, major dickhead.

You may be wondering, why is Ghost a dickhead?

Because Soap was stuck to will the boner away HE caused when he tried to tongue fuck his mouth in the middle of their kitchen!

That fucker knew what he was doing, he knew and still did it! Soap just hoped it’s not that noticeable because he doesn’t want to look like a huge creep to Angel when she kindly invited him over for a hang out.

Angel opened the door of her house, grinning as soon as she saw Soap, “You’re literally right on time! Please, come in!” She leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek as greeting.

“I’m a punctual man.” Soap laughed, trying to relax so he stops thinking about his dying boner. “Should I take my shoes off?” He asked when he noticed her wearing nothing but socks on her feet.

“Yes, please. And let me get that for you.” She said, taking the plastic bag Soap was holding and making her way to the kitchen, “Oh, you got the pink Oreos?” She laughed while looking inside the bag.

Soap slipped off his shoes and placed them neatly to the side, looking around the place. He does know what her kitchen looks like, but he never stepped a foot inside the rest of her home, but now that he does, he was taking everything in.

Angel’s home was simple, yet homey. She had a lot of mirrors hung around, Johnny noticed, and quite a lot of plants, and paintings on her walls. Her living room was nicely decorated as well, with quite a lot of books, some figurines, posters of singers, music albums and random knick knacks, who were interestingly enough, from different time periods, Johnny noticed.

On the coffee table, there was quite a hefty amount of fashion magazines and an empty glass of water.

“So, how’re you, Soap?” Angel asked, glancing up at him as he made her way to the kitchen.

“Good, you?” Soap said with a nod.

“I’m alright, how’s work?” Angel asked as she neatly placed the snacks on individual bowls and then on a tray.

“It’s alright, nothing exciting.” Soap shrugged and Angel hummed, “That’s good. Can you get cups from the cupboard?” Soap turned around and placed his hand on a random handle, “Not that one, the one on the left- Yep, that one.”

Soap took out two glasses and carried the beers and the Coke bottle in his arms while Angel led the way to her room with the tray of snacks. “Where’s your cat, by the way?” Soap asked, remembering she had a cat and hadn't seen the animal anywhere.

“Upstairs in my room,” Angel said and gasped, “I just realised that you’re the first man to enter my bedroom since I’ve moved in.”

“I am?” Soap said, surprised.

“Well, if you don't count the guys that moved my furniture in."

When Soap stepped inside her bedroom, he didn’t know what to expect, really, but he was intrigued either way. Her bedroom looks extremely comfortable, with fluffy pillows and sheets and blankets on her bed. Her bedroom was also quite big, with fluffy carpets on the floor and a huge mirror leaning against the wall, taller and wider than Soap.

“Why the hell do you have this monstrosity of mirror? What if it falls on you one day?” Soap laughed, checking his hair and face in the mirror.

Angel giggled and placed the tray on her desk, “I use it to travel through worlds and dreams.”

Soap chuckled, “I mean, it’s as big as a door.”

“Kuromi, say hello to Soap.” Angel said and Soap placed the glasses and drinks on her desk, suddenly feeling a press against his leg and when he looked down he cooed, “Hey, pretty girl.”

He leaned down and picked up the cat, scratching her under the chin while she happily let him and even purred in his arms. Then Kuromi let out a cute yawn and Soap grinned, “Yeah? You like that? Of course, you do.”

Angel smiled at the sight, “You’re Kuromi Approved, now.”

Soap looked up, “Kuromi Approved?”

“Yeah, she has the ability to smell bullshit and shitty personalities on people, and it seems like she deems you safe to be in here.” Angel said making Soap chuckle and gently lower Kuromi on the bed.

“Well, I’m glad I passed her test.” Soap laughed.

“Okay, let’s get to the part where we get to the real reason why you’re here,” Angel smirked and placed her hands on his shoulders, “Sit and close your eyes.”

Soap let himself be pushed down and sat on the edge of her bed, “Close my eyes?”

“Yeah, it’s just for a second.” Angel smiled.

Soap nodded and closed his eyes, feeling a bit nervous but he played it cool by leaning a bit back, supporting his weight with his hands on the mattress behind him.

"You can open them now." She said and Johnny opened them slowly, and he didn't know what to expect, really.

Angel was holding the same brown skirt from before, but this time it looked a little different, a bit bigger, well, definitely bigger compared to her waist size.

"That's-" Johnny pointed at the skirt and looked up at Angel.

"The same skirt I have, only in your size, well, I hope it's in your size." Angel said, practically vibrating with excitement while grinning.

"And what am I supposed to do with it?-"

Angel smirked and placed one of her hands on her hip, "What do you think? Try it on and let's get this party started."

"I wonder what they're doing right now." Gaz wondered while laying on his back on his bed, throwing a tennis ball in the air and catching it with one hand.

When Gaz didn't get an answer from Ghost sitting next to him, he nudged him with his foot, "Hey, I'm talking to you."

"How the fuck am I supposed to know, Garrick?" Ghost mumbled while folding and refolding their clean laundry.

"Hm, I'm smelling…Jealously! Are you jealous, lieutenant?" Gaz mused with a small smirk and innocently batted his eyelashes when Ghost glared at him.

Ghost was most definitely about to say something smart when both of their phones pinged with a notification.

Both Gaz and Ghost looked at each other then reached for their phones at the same time.

"What's this?" Ghost frowned at his screen when he saw that a picture was shared in their group chat. And did a double take when he realised it was from their neighbour.

When the picture downloaded, he didn't know what to say or do but stare. And it seemed like Gaz had the same reaction until another picture was shared and Gaz cursed, then dropped his phone on his face, cursing for an entirely different reason.

The pictures were a mirror selfie of Johnny and Angel wearing matching brown pleated skirts, so short you could see the bottom of Johnny's black boxers. Angel was grinning while linking her other arm with Johnny as he flexed his other arm, his white tank top riding up and revealing a happy trail and tanned abs.

They simply looked absolutely delicious together that Simon struggled to breathe and had to lock his phone for a breather.

The other picture was of them looking over their shoulders, popping their butt at the camera as Angel snapped a mirror pic. They looked like they were having so much fun but none of the boys knew that it took a bit of convincing to get Johnny to wear it and take a mirror picture.

"How do you feel?" Angel asked, holding one of Johnny's hands in front of the mirror as he looked at their reflections. Him in his tank top, skirt, socks and her in her bra, skirt and socks.

Johnny looked at his tan skin, at the dark hairs on his arms, legs and chest, the scars and at his messy mohawk, at his massive shoulders, at his muscular thighs and sharp jawline.

"I'm not sure this fits me." He said, digging his heels in Angel's carpet.

"What do you mean? Is it the colour?" Angel asked.

"I don't know, this looks like it'd fit someone, cuter. I think maybe black would fit me, leather, studs and all." He mumbled and Angel sighed, "Johnny, I know you're literally in the army, but please, for the love of everything Holy and Dear, don't put yourself in a box."

"I'm not, lass."

"You are, Soap. I know you don't look like the image of innocence to wear pleated skirts but that doesn't mean they won't suit you. I, for one, think you look absolutely great in them!" Angel said, placing both of her hands on his shoulders and squeezing once.

Soap didn't know what to say and instead stared down at her, then eventually at her glossy plump lips.

"Soap," He watched her lips move and breathe out his name.

"Hm?" Johnny hummed, unable to look away from her lips.

"Have you ever worn a bikini top?"

"What?"

Back at home, Gaz and Ghost, including Price were lowkey losing their minds over the flood of pictures shared with them in the groupchat.

There was pictures were both Johnny and Angel wore the same bikini top and posed in cute and sexy poses. And because Angel had a gigantic mirror in her room, they could see everything, every detail of their outfits and the mess of clothes and shoes strewn out across her bedroom.

Some pictures were shared in the groupchat, and some were not, specially kept private so Soap can use them to torture his favourite lieutenant.

Angel and Johnny took turns snapping pictures of each other while Angel's playlist played in the playground, girly, fun, glittery and slutty, Angel's favourite type of music to dance to in the club.

One of the pictures Angel took of Johnny were of him laying on her fluffy bed, back against the headboard, with nothing on except a small pale pink skirt. They drank beer and coke, fed each other snacks and giggled over random stories until they tired themselves out, laying on Angel's bed.

At that rate, Angel was wearing a tiny, poor excuse of a bikini top with a tiny jean skirt while Johnny was still wearing just that damn pale pink skirt. He laid on his back on her bed, staring at the ceiling with Angel laid next to him, her head on his chest with one of her legs thrown across one of his massive thighs.

Soap had one of his arms wrapped around her waist, caressing the naked skin of her back while she hummed along to the music and he reflected on how she managed to unleash a version of himself he hadn't the courage or the time to let out.

He felt so many things.

But he knew in that moment, he felt sexy, he felt beautiful and handsome. He felt good and he felt hot. And most importantly, he's had fun, like a lot of fun, trying accessories of all shapes and colours with Angel, the woman was like Barbie to him, or a Bratz doll, with a closet full of magic and wonders.

"Have you ever worn a skirt before?" Angel asked, voice low and he closed his eyes.

"Aye."

"A skirt, not a kilt. You know, for fun." Angel corrected and Soap opened his eyes, "No."

Angel hummed and drew random shapes on his warm skin, "Did you have fun?"

"'Course, I did." He smiled while Britney Spears played in the playground.

"I'm glad." Angel smiled, running a finger over one of his many scar.

"Thank you." Soap said sincerely.

Angel lifted her head and pushed herself forward, placing a kiss to Soap's cheek, "You're welcome, pretty."

Soap grabbed her by the waist and easily flipped them around so she was now laying on her back with him hovering above her, "Me? Pretty? Have ya seen yourself, Angel?"

Angel giggled at how she was easily manhandled and at the kiss that Soap loudly placed on one of her warm cheeks.

"Prettiest fucking lass I've laid my eyes on." He said while tickling her sides as she laughed and tried to push him away.

In truth, she could easily free herself from his hold, could empower his strength and get away, she was a supernatural creature after all. She could change the rhythm of his heartbeat with a blink, she could stop his heart from beating all together, she could slither herself in his mind and make him forget anything and remember a reality that has never existed.

Simply put, she was fucking powerful to a terrifying level.

But luckily for Johnny, she was a Wish Angel on a mission and won't do anything that could prevent her from completing her Assignment. That's what everyone at the Wish Office in the other realm knows at least.

Angel's legs somehow ended up wrapped around Johnny's waist, and because he was just human, just desire wrapped in flesh, her heat, the skin to skin contact, the scent of her sweet shampoo, her sparkling eyes and inviting lips were irresistible. So he leaned in and got a taste of sweetness and sin.

So when he ran his big calloused hands all over her supple and soft skin and shuddered when she ran her hands up his arms to grab onto his biceps and his shoulders slumped when she giggled in his mouth and gave his lower lip a kitten lick.

And so Johnny kissed her slow and steady, wanting to savour everything she was willing to give him. And he was so distracted by her warm lips and her hands on his skin, he didn't realise he was rolling his hips against her until she bit her lower lip and threw her head back.

It happened all too quickly and too slow at the same time, Johnny was unable to stop the rutting of his hips or the little gasps that left his lips. That is until Angel grabbed his shoulders and pushed him away.

Johnny was confused but he let her push him away and blushed when she then proceeded to sit on his lap and cup the bulge between his legs over the skirt.

He gasped and moaned when she pressed the heel of her hand on his swollen cock and couldn't stop himself from panting when she was looking at him straight in the eyes with a hungry smile. Her eyes were wide in lust and wonder, they practically sparkled under the light of the lamplight and the LED lights on her vanity.

Johnny's face was pink when she reached inside his boxers and started palming him and massaging his wet tip with the palm of her hand. His lips were shiny with spit and swollen, and his eyelids were heavy and Angel wanted to fucking eat him right then and there.

When she fully took him out of his boxers, she told him to hold his skirt so she can get a look at his cock, and when she did she looked at him and said, "Johnny, you have such a pretty cock."

He trembled then, and moaned when she spat on her palm and started stroking him properly, his tip constantly leaking and making the slide that much easier. And her other hand was cupping his balls.

Of course Johnny had to spread his legs a bit so she could comfortably jerk him off, and she was still sitting on his lap, with enough space between her and Johnny's stomach so she can fit her hands between his legs and reduce him to a wet, panting, mess.

Slick sounds were heard in her bedroom, along with Johnny's gasps, moans and curses. He was still holding onto that skirt against his stomach for dear life after being threatened to stop jerking him off if he drops it by Angel.

His tan chest was pink and his nipples were hard pebbles now, begging to be kissed and licked. The swell of Johnny's chest kept going up and down when Angel leaned forward to place a tiny kiss to one of Johnny's pecs, then collarbone, neck, side of his mouth, chin and finally mouth.

Little gasps and moans were spilling out of his lips as she skilfully brought him to his climax where he spilled all over her hand and the skirt.

Angel felt her chest swell with pride when she felt his warm cum cover her fingers. She didn't say anything nor paid attention to the slick mess in her underwear, or how the fabric was practically plastered to her pussy at that point.

"Sorry-" Soap panted out, wiping the sweat on his forehead with the back of his hand.

"Why are you apologising for?" Angel said, running her fingers through his mohawk.

"I ruined your skirt." He said, fluttering his eyes shut and letting himself fall back on the bed, placing his warm hands on her naked thighs as he calmed down from his orgasm.

"I can wash it." Angel hummed and placed a small kiss on his lips and he grinned, eyes dark and full of lust.

"You're good with your hands, bonnie." He bit his lower lip and thumbed at the hem of her short jean skirt.

"I'm even better with my mouth." She grinned and he felt arousal stir again at the bottom of his stomach.

"You'll have to show me another day. It's my turn now." He said and gave a smack to her inner thigh, gaining him a squeal from her as he manhandled them around so she was laying on her back with her legs over his shoulders.

"At least let me take this off-" Angel tried to pull her skirt down and Soap pried her hands away from it, "No need, just trust me and relax."

Angel nodded and almost gulped when she saw how dark and absolutely spilling with lust his eyes were. He looked at her like he was about to devour her whole, like a tiger hiding behind high grass, watching a gazelle before striking.

"Just trust me and relax."

tag list (pls ask to be added or removed): @loveyhoneydovey @cutiecusp @pinkwigonmytv @mandythemint @itsberrydreemurstuff @tapioca-marzipan @fruitymoonbeams-blog @poohkie90 @chaoticevilbakugo @anubis-reed @thefairybird @skytacvia @marytvirgin @cynicalmnm @maechanexe @t0jis-worm @1800imgay @4ndjelij4 @multitargaryen @lilpothoscuttings @mysticalpandabear @silviafantin15 @marvel-ness @bobastayhigh @originalsimp @h-leigh @gxldyjess @msdrpreist @whore4dilfs @alexwashere82 @clown-spoon @ray-rook @urbimom

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holly-fixation · 1 year ago

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Imagine CC Sephiroth finding a CCTV footage of something related to his early developement where in the background he can see a woman (Jenova, from his photo) and can faintly hear her screaming at Hojo "let me hold him" and "you can't take my son away from me"

Snooping around the data room was bound to cut through the web of Hojo's lies and half truths eventually, which is exactly why he kept going back. Occasionally, he found old tapes and took them to his apartment for further inspection, hiding each one under his long uniform coat and returning them before anyone noticed.

At first he doesn't believe what he's seeing.

It was his recovery from his first mako procedure, long before he could speak or crawl or remember. He was in a pod not much larger than he was, an egg of glass protecting him and regulating the oxygen levels as necessary.

The baby in the incubator shivered, scratching at the wires in its skin in an attempt to break free. Each wire was anchored with metal shackles, presumably one of the only things it couldn't break, probably also reused from the many dogs Hojo bred for the President's son. The first five minutes only showed his cold and discomfort as he struggled to heal.

But he recognized the woman in the observation glass. He heard her muffled cries and chose to ignore them until her face entered the frame. A face he held close to his chest for as long as he could.

It was her. It was Jenova, her brown hair in the exact same ponytail as her photo. Her pleas no longer drowned in his ears.

"Let me hold him!"

Then Hojo entered the screen as well, though his face was cut off Sephiroth knew every mannerism of that wicked man like the back of his hand. Every step, every gesture, every shift of dark glasses.

"Just once! Please!"

His heart ached. He felt his hand move to his chest, to where her photo used to remain.

"Absolutely not. Your presence at this stage will damage him beyond repair. I will not allow you to ruin this with your meddling."

"Hojo, please!"

He did not budge. "I allowed you this far. You may look at him through that window before security escorts you out."

"You can't take my son away from me!"

"This is my laboratory, and I will do as I please. You have seven seconds."

She surrendered, placing her hands against the glass, turning away from the scientist with tears down her cheeks. "Sephiroth!"

His breath hitched. His name. Her voice. Her undeniable care.

"Sephiroth, my son, know your mother loves you! I love you so much and I would break you free if I was strong enough! I love you, my son! I would do anything to be by your side!"

The helmeted officers came and pulled her arms back.

"Sephiroth! SEPHIROTH!"

A door opened and closed, and the recording continued as if nothing happened.

Sephiroth ejected the tape before taking his weapon and rushing to the labs, the evidence again hidden under his coat until he met his target.

The scientist's side glance infuriated his already burning nerves. He said nothing as he pushed the scientist away from the desk and inserted the tape into an old player connected to a CRT screen. He skipped ahead and paused the video when Jenova came into full view against the window.

Hojo groaned in annoyance, literally rolling his eyes. "Why are you showing me this, boy? I was there, you know."

"You said she died in childbirth."

"I said she died after you were born."

"You ripped me away."

"And I made you better for it. Do you have any idea how pathetic you'd become under a mentally unstable mess like her?"

"Don't you dare speak of my mother that way!"

"I knew her well. I will speak of her as I please."

"...where is she?"

"Pardon?"

"Where. Is she?"

"I just said she's dead."

"And why would I believe you?"

"You're wasting my time."

"Why would I believe you?"

The room turned cold. "Because I am the only source you have, and you know it."

That deep reality tainted the entirety of the interrogation, and Sephiroth was forced to leave with the exact same knowledge he walked in with. He couldn't stop hearing her voice. He couldn't stop the looping plea in his mind.

Know your mother loves you!

Sephiroth!

Sephiroth.

#ff7 #sephiroth #ffvii #final fantasy vii #final fantasy 7 #lucrecia crescent #ffvii hojo #hojo ffvii #hojo ff7 #i promise I can write happy stuff too #I swear i can

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butmakeitgayblog · 2 years ago

Note

Sometimes i think about Clexa being so soft just hugging, eyes closed and swaying slowly side to side 🥹

Ya know that's something I've thought a lot about and maybe it's a side note but I'm gonna rant on it.

I tend to find a lot of canon fics write Lexa as this standoffish person, not very affectionate or openly giving of acts of touch, but I say look at the facts here.

Lexa was an extremely expressive person in non-verbal ways. She was so very obviously a women of "actions speak louder than words." And when you take that into consideration, let's look at how she conducted herself around Clarke.

First of all, the girl was always putting herself in Clarke's space. And I'm not talking general vicinity, I'm talking

fuckin literally in her space. Like,,, if someone stood that close to me in line I'd have to drop a "bitch give me two feet. Damn 😒" on em. She liked to get close.

Second, where I think sometimes the crossed wires come from with Lexa's character and how she shows emotion is that they're taking how Lexa acts as the commander and applying it to how she is on a personal level. But in my opinion, I think that doesn't do her justice. Because you have to remember, the majority of her time on s2 was spent with her dealing with the fact that Clarke was angry with her. She was trying to be respectful of Clarke's wishes for distance, thus bottling up her emotions for Clarke's comfort. But even still, even with all that, it still bled through.

God bless her, but the girl

Was not very good

At holding back her desire

And more than that, Lexa very much welcomed Clarke's touch

(Nice move for the thigh there wanheda ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

She never shied away from it or seemed to do anything other than soak it up.

And from the start!

Lexa!

Initiated!

Contact!

She pushed for kisses and she pushed to be closer. She was the one who tipped the tension between them into the romantic arena. She showed physical and emotional intimacy time and again with Clarke, from being willing to take a damn nap with Clarke in her tent to bowing at her feet when the commander bows before no one. She took Clarke's hand and held it and accepted that comfort that Clarke offered, freely. She even trusted Clarke with a damn blade pressed to her neck for God's sake. She was never ever wary of letting Clarke touch her, even when she herself was working to hold back her desire to touch. And when they finally made love it was Lexa who pulled Clarke to her bed and guided her down into a kiss. Clarke may have initiated the kiss because Lexa wouldn't have over stepped the boundary Clarke laid down, but I'll be damned if Lexa didn't immediately go for gold after 🤷‍♀️

My point through all of this is that yes, I believe without a doubt that if they'd been allowed to be together longer, they would've been such an intensely affectionate couple in their own ways. With Clarke, who is a demonstrative person at her core and whose love language is visibly touch, and Lexa, who shows her love in small, subtle ways because she's so used to having it smacked away or buried under obligation and tradition, you'd have this couple who in the safety of each other would allow themselves a chance to just be soft. To touch and comfort and soothe. To breathe each other in and just be Clarke and Lexa, not Commander snd Wanheda. I think they would've fallen asleep in each other's arms and hugged most mornings before going their separate ways. I think it would've been entirely normal for Clarke to hug Lexa from behind as Lexa looked out from her balcony over Polis. And I don't think Lexa would've been shy in her appreciation of Clarke's affection, nor in returning her own.

There's a reason why everyone knew of their feelings for each other and why not once did Lexa deny it even when confronted about it. In reality, she doubled down on it by kicking a clan member off the tower and inviting Clarke to stay despite the kill order. Both pretty brazen when you think about it.

If given the chance they both would've been all in and you'll never convince me otherwise.

Indra wouldn't have known a moment's peace 😔

#clexa #lexa kom trikru #clarke griffin #anon #anyway rant over sorry that went wild 🥴#i don't feel like I even need to explain Clarke because I mean she hugged everyone #the girl is naturally a hugger she would hug a tree under the right circumstances I'm convinced of it #but Lexa is the tricky spot in this fandom and idk I just feel she gets a raw deal when it comes to being affectionate #the girl was very affectionate /when she wasn't being just Heda/#and together I think they would've driven Indra even more fucking insane

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be-co-me · 11 months ago

Text

All I Want For Christmas Is You

Levi Ackerman

6.8k words

Summary: The day before Christmas Eve, you happen upon your new roommate's living room calendar and discover that his birthday also happens to fall on Christmas and after a drunken night of meeting his friends and getting to know each other better, also discover he doesn't have a family to spend Christmas with, so you offer him your own.

A/N: The more I wrote this, the more I hated it lol, but please listen to my favorite Christmas song before or while you read as it gives me the floaty happy feeling I desire this fic to have. It's Cold December Night by Michael Buble. Levi may be a bit OOC, but I wanted this ready for Christmas, so I didn't have much time to skim it over and fix things. Thank you for reading and please let me know your thoughts! This isn't yet edited so please don't mind any mistakes! The AO3 curse got me the past couple of days, so this is much more delayed than I would have liked it to be.

-----

You pulled the last of your packed moving boxes through the front door of your new residence, nudging the door closed with your foot as to not let anymore of the heat inside escape. You had been moving things in slowly the past week, the first few days unpacking consisted of larger and more important items and as the days passed, the less important items made their way into your new home. You let the heavy box cradled in your arms plop to the floor with a thud and sighed heavily, folding over to catch your breath. You quite literally felt a huge weight drop from your shoulders as you realized you were done moving. And not only was it the last box, but the last of your Christmas shopping.

Speaking of Christmas, you noticed the lack of Christmas decor adorning your new apartment. While the shared quarters still held a sense of home and comfort, the decor, you felt, was not up to par for the season near enough for your liking. You would have to ask your new roommate about it and see if you could put more up. You shrugged your winter attire off and made your way to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. It would be a long night of wrapping presents and you could use all of the fuel your peppermint mocha had to offer.

As your Keurig sputtered your drink of choice out, you opted to change into comfortable clothes for the evening. When you reentered the kitchen, you grabbed the steaming mug off the machine and blew on the top of the drink, taking a small sip to test the temperature on your tongue.

As you did so, your eyes wandered the walls and found a relatively large calendar hung perfectly straight. You eyed the current date, December 23rd, and the following days, your eyes widening as you abandoned your warm mug on the countertop and made your way closer to the calendar.

Your fingers touched along the block that held 'Christmas Day' and your eyes roamed the calendar adorned in neat script and back to the unfamiliar scrawl that sat atop the block labeled 25.

'LEVI'S BIRTHDAY!!!!!!' It read, in messy capital letters with an astronomical amount of exclamation points following the words. A quite ugly and cartoonish drawing of glasses sat underneath the script, the manufactured 'Christmas Day' scribbled out, and you assumed one of his friends had written everything inside the box. A feeling of panic set in. You had to get him something. It was his birthday. Did that explain the lack of Christmas decor? Does he despise Christmas?

At that moment, you heard a set of keys jingle outside and the click of the door unlocking. You quickly stepped away from the calendar and your hands encased your mug once again. You took another sip of the drink as Levi walked in, brushing snow off of his shoulders. You looked away, scrunching your face at the still boiling hot temperature of the mocha, cursing your awkwardness around the new man. His face adorned the same look, but only because of the cold.

His eyes met yours with a curt nod in greeting as he removed his shoes and he began walking towards the counter. He set his keys across the countertop and hung his backpack across the back of one of the high top stools lining the island countertop you currently leaned on.

"Sorry it's so late. I'm glad I didn't wake you up." he said, unzipping the bag and pulling his laptop out. You shook your head.

"I just got back as well! I finally have all of my stuff here now, so no more ruckus!" you responded hastily, opting to sip your drink once more. You hadn't yet engaged in many conversations with the man, only those around your mutual friend who shared your own college major, Isabel, who had suggested you as Levi's new roommate. But she wasn't here anymore to guide your conversation and it felt quite awkward.

"That's good to hear." he responded, fingers working to plug in the laptop's charger into the countertop. Something you hadn't yet noticed about the home, but you were glad it existed and were sure it would prove handy for late nights studying. You wondered if he had also felt awkward around you. That would have to end quickly if so.

You continued sipping at the drink in silence and watched as he worked, typing into the laptop. Maybe it would be a good time to retreat to your bedroom and give him his space to mitigate from work. Or make him a warm drink as well? Maybe try to strike up a conversation and get to know more about him? Or-

"Got any plans for the evening?" he asked, cutting your internal rapid firing line of questioning off. Your eyes met his own when he stopped typing. Your cheeks warmed at the steely grey's examining your expression. You quickly looked into the swirl of your drink.

"You're looking at them. Why? Got something in mind?" you asked, jumping at the opportunity to know more about him, or more specifically, what would be his fancy in terms of a gift or two.

"Hmm. I'm surprised Isabel didn't mention it. We're all going out in town tonight for a few hours." he responded, fingers reaching for his phone, also plugged in, and swiping it open. You were also surprised she hadn't mentioned so, but forgetful was one of her more endearing qualities so you were quite sure it wasn't on purpose.

"She's forgetful. I'm sure she meant to ask you about it though." he responded to himself. "So? Would you like to come?" he asked. His voice monotonous. He continued his work as you pondered the question and the task you would be abandoning for the evening.

You nodded, agreeing to go along, but now you would have to get ready. You'd have to give Isabel a call and see what the unspoken dress code of the evening was. You imagined if it went her way, you'd be quite dressed up for the night, which also meant freezing your ass off.

"I'll go get ready!" you responded. He nodded and turned his full attention back to his computer, finishing what you could assume was work for his graduate program he'd be starting the preceding semester at the university you would now also be a part of. You had met Isabel at a club meeting in your old college. An event all the universities had gone to. You had struck up a conversation with her, and were pleased to find she went to the same school you would soon be transferring to and it was history from there.

You pulled your phone from under your waistband, finding Isabel's contact as you closed the door to your bedroom. You set a coaster out onto your desk and set your drink down. You'd definitely need the fuel now. Or maybe the better idea would be to abandon it for water.

"Heeellllloooo?" a perky voice drew out the greeting. You smiled, shaking your head.

"Did you forget to tell me something?" you asked. A loud gasp rang over the other line and you took the phone off your ear in preparation for the yelling that was about to ensue across the other line.

"I'm so so sorry! I totally meant to tell you when Hange planned it! Shit! Did Levi tell you?" she asked. You nodded, laughing.

"Yes he did. Now onto more important details. What are you wearing? Is this more of a dressy going out or just comfy?" you asked, fingers sliding hangers over as you mulled over what you could wear for the evening in either option. You hated to not fit in with the theme.

"Hange wants us to dress up because it's Levi's birthday on the 25th! SHIT! That's another thing I forgot to mention!" she responded. This was a celebration. You felt guilty at not knowing the new man's birthday sooner. You chuckled despite the nervous thoughts that began to rapid fire your brain again.

"It's alright! FaceTime me so you can help me pick an outfit out!" you told her. You removed the phone from your ear, awaiting the video call and answering as soon as she called.

----

Your outfit of choice ended up being much more short and showy than usual; an extremely short velvet cocktail dress and heels that matched the color, much to Isabel's pleasure. You wore your trusty black 'going out' trench coat as it went with everything and kept you as warm as you could be in a short dress.

You finished the minute details of your outfit, leaving your bedroom. You walked into the living room, eyes in search of your new roommate to see if he was ready to go.

He had also changed into something a bit more dressed up; a pair of slacks, dress shoes, a button up shirt, and a blazer. His steely grey's met your own, looking down and up before meeting your own again. You swore your caught the faintest tint of blushing to his cheeks.

"Won't you be cold?" he asked, turning towards the counter, taking ahold of his keys. You shook your head.

"This is my trusty trench coat, either it's never let me down or alcohol warms me up enough." you responded.

"Want me to drive? Or we could walk if you won't be too cold or uncomfortable." he responded. You could only nod before realizing you were given two options in the question.

"Walking is fine." you answered curtly. You made your way to the front door, opening it and stepping into the cold. He followed behind you, his hand meeting your own as he propped the door open. You quickly retracted your hand. Now it was your turn to blush, but at least you could blame it on the cold weather.

You heard the telltale click of the lock on the door and he stepped down the stairs in front of you, turning and offering a hand. You stood still, putting your hand up to take his own in hesitation.

"It would really suck if you fell down the stairs before we got there." he said. You laughed loudly, slapping your hand down into his own and beginning your descent down the stairs. You small talked about your days, his at work and university, despite the off season from the semester, and you about your moving and Christmas plans.

You made it to the first place of the evening, a fine dining restaurant. If this friend group was anything like the one in your hometown, then you'd get dinner first and then get wild at bars and hangout spots the rest of the evening and into early morning.

You weren't quite sure of what anyone looked like outside of Isabel, your eyes scanning the tables for a mop of pink hair, but you couldn't see above anyone even with your heels on, and the restaurant was what you would call 'packed', everyone eager to finish their drinking bouts with heir university friends before returning home to their families.

You looked to Levi, who also struggled to see over the top of patron's heads. His eyes widened lightly and then met your own. He nodded his head a certain direction and you began following him through the throng of people towards your destination, taking ahold of the sleeve of his jacket.

Once making it to the table, Isabel stood, beaming.

"This is the infamous new roommate I've been telling you guys about!" she shouted. You laughed, Levi taking a seat next to Isabel. You opted to take the empty spot next to him at the end of the table.

Isabel sputtered more facts about you to the group before someone cut her speech off, a lean blonde man with bright blue eyes.

"Please, introduce yourself. We at least need a name with the face." he said more politely so than Isabel, who now pouted. You laughed too, proffering your name and a few small details about yourself. Where you came from, what your college major was, although you were sure Isabel had already shared those facts for you in her eagerness to adopt you into the friend group, and more typical introductory details.

The server came around and asked drink orders. You went with your regular drink of choice, something that wouldn't get you drunk after one, but definitely not something to drink on all evening. Everyone else made their orders and you were surprised to find Levi had actually ordered something containing alcohol. Albeit, not much, but it was a start. Isabel had told you he wasn't much of the drinker with he exception of tea and the occasional coffee whilst studying together. Your elbow met his arm and his gaze quickly made its way over to you.

"I thought I heard you weren't much of a drinker?" you chided. He looked down to his hands, which sat clasped together atop the table, then leaned back in his chair, a hand brushing through his hair with a long sigh.

"Hange said if I didn't have some drinks tonight they would cancel the whole thing." he responded, irritation laced in his tone, a stone cold gaze now looking to the perpetrator. You laughed loudly.

"I'm sure that's not true." you responded as your drink was placed into your field of vision. You took a sip right away, savoring the way this restaurant made it. This may be the best variation of the drink you had drank before. You'd have to ask for the recipe they used if they'd give it to you.

As you sipped at your drink, you side eyed Levi, who hesitantly took a sip of his own. His nose scrunched and he stirred into the drink more with the cocktail straws, taking another sip, seemingly satisfied with how it tasted now. You engaged in idle chatter with the group, only ordering appetizers and splitting them all amongst yourselves evenly. You insisted you boot Levi's portion of the bill, but Erwin met that proposition with a strong and resounding 'No'.

After two drinks you began feeling warm for the evening, ready to shed your coat at the next location the night took you too. You only followed his friends, not sure what they had in mind. You were sure they had regular locations they frequented and such.

You walked behind the group next to Levi, noticing the silence between the two of you was much more comfortable than earlier in the evening at your shared home. You found yourself enjoying his company more and more so.

Isabel suddenly came up behind you, tossing an arm over your shoulders and the other over Levi's. You stumbled, laughing. As you regained your footing, you caught the heavy glare Levi pointed her direction.

"Can't yell at me tonight bro!" she shouted, laughing loudly. You laughed along, wondering how their dynamic would usually be in your absence. It seemed her lifelong dream may have been to get on every last nerve roaming through his body you thought, maybe even Hange too. You were almost certain they planned antics to annoy him together.

The group made their way inside the next location and the first thing you did was shed the stuffy coat, draping it across your arm. Christmas music boomed loudly across the speakers as it intertwined with the bar's usual playlist.

You followed the group as they made their way through groups of dancing people to a table tucked in the back corner of the bar. You sat your coat atop a chair, scheming how you would pay for all of Levi's drinks for the remainder of the evening.

"What would everyone like? I'll go grab it!" you asked the group as they attempted to make themselves comfortable atop the booth behind the table. You opened a note in your phone and began writing them down.

"I'll come with you. You can't carry it all." Levi announced, standing. You noticed his blazer now shed off as well, another button undone on his dress shirt. It was now your turn to eye him, down and up. When your eyes returned to his face, his eyes met your own with what you could swear was the faintest hint of a knowing smile.

You walked to the bar, grabbing ahold of his shirt sleeve once more as you followed. You squeezed between two people's shoulders and leaned against the bar to wait your turn for a server. You turned your head over both shoulders to find Levi, his hand perched to your left side on the bar and right on his hip. You felt safely encaged, like no one could hurt you. While he didn't stand much taller than yourself, he definitely held an intimidating aura, something you couldn't say was a quality of your own.

You quickly looked back to the bartender as they were ready for your order and leaned further, allowing them to see your phone's notepad as you explained your new friend's drink orders. She nodded, stalking off to quickly make the requested list and move to the next.

Once she returned, you began handing Levi drinks and carried four on your own, which you were quite impressed with. Maybe your old serving job was useful in some aspects. You carefully walked back to the table as to not cause a mess or drop anything.

"Alright. Here's Furlan's, Isabel's, Hange's, and Levi's." you recited, handing the drinks to each respective person and setting Levi's in front of the seat that held his jacket. You turned to grab the remaining drinks out of his hands, smiling as your eyes met his own. He wasn't one to smile nor show emotion much, always stoic, you noticed. You turned back and set your own drink next to the seat you had discarded your jacket in and also next to Levi's.

"And finally mine, Erwin's, Moblit's, and Miche's." you finished. You clapped your hands together and made your way to your seat after Levi made his way in.

After loud idle chatter about anything and everything, Isabel and Hange insisted that you come to the dance floor with them, and despite your considerable amount of protesting, you ended up in major defeat as both of them grabbed ahold of each of your arms, dragging you out of your chair.

You laughed as you danced with them in a circle, each of you holding one of the other two's hands, skipping around. Some of the classic club songs blared through the speakers and your last drink began creeping into your bloodstream. You laughed harder at the heinous dancing Hange managed to pull off, curled over with your eyes closed, laughing the hardest you think you ever had.

You felt a finger tap your shoulder and you straightened your posture, eyes meeting the perpetrator. Isabel leaned close to your ear, telling you the group wanted to take shots and you should head to the table. You nodded and followed behind her and Hange, all holding hands so you wouldn't lose each other in the now packed and large crowd.

You placed your hands atop the edge of the table as you reached it to steady your balance, laughing as you thought of a silly dance Hange had done on the dance floor, your gaze meeting Levi's. Despite his lack of emotion, he didn't seem to be having a bad time. He seemed the type to enjoy the company of his friends and be hellbent on not showing it.

Shot glasses full of bright red liquid were dispersed and you attempted to ask what it was. The overall consensus was that it was a Christmas themed drink. You shrugged and downed the shot after Hange's loud and enthusiastic countdown.

You returned to the dance floor, more of the group joining along, with the exception of Erwin and Levi, who remained chatting away at the table. You couldn't help it, but you found yourself gazing his way the entire evening. You wished he was the dancing type.

After another shot later in the evening, you all had decided to filter outside in search of your next location. You had also succeeded in paying for all of Levi's drinks, much to Erwin's dismay, who insisted paying the entire bill every place you went to.

You opted to not put your coat back on, allowing the cold weather to sober you. You couldn't help but smile as you watched the group. You hoped to become a permanent part of it.

You felt a nudge to your shoulder and looked towards Levi, his hands in his pockets as he walked. Your cheeks were warm and your smile grew wider as he encased his hands over your shoulders, rubbing lightly. You were a bit cold. Maybe he could tell? You had surrendered your coat to Isabel, who had forgotten her own at home.

"Enjoying yourself?" he asked. You nodded eagerly.

"I should be asking you that question." you responded, nudging him back. He shook his head and you all opted for the last location of the evening to be a small coffee shop cafe, something they apparently did routinely after going out for the night. You never did get to finish your peppermint mocha earlier in the evening.

You walked up to the shop, ordering another of the aforementioned drink. Levi had opted for tea, and everyone else some variation of a hot chocolate or coffee. You filtered out of the door, allowing more patrons to filter in before hearing a screech and howling laughter that could only belong to one person behind you.

Your eyes turned to Hange, who pointed a finger curtly above your head, still laughing. Your eyes widened as they met the bundle of leaves and small white fruit hanging above you. Your eyes met the pair of also widened steely greys in front of you.

"You have to! It's bad luck if you don't!" Isabel shouted. Erwin and Moblit could only shake their heads at the antics of the two troublemakers, who doubled over howling with laughter.

What do you do? You don't want to reject Levi. Nor do you want bad luck during the incoming year. If anything, you currently wanted him to kiss you. You shrugged your shoulders and his eyes scanned your features, down to your lips and back to your own gaze. You wet your lips with your tongue unconsciously, stepping closer to your roommate.

And as if by chance, the cheesy Christmas music playing the entire evening filtered through the cafe doors as they opened. The line in the music gave you a sense of (false?) confidence, a sense of this being fated to happen in your tipsy state.

'So kiss me on this cold December night.'

You lightly placed your hands over his arms and his own met your shoulders hesitantly, circling his thumbs over them once more. His eyes scanned over your face once again, as if asking permission. You nodded, closing your eyes, and soon after felt a pair of warm plush lips capture your own. And like a ghost, they were there one second and gone the next.

You forgot about the group behind you, your eyes opening and meeting the pair in front of you. Your smile beamed once more, the group behind you hooping and hollering at the two of you. He really smiled for the first time that evening.

As you made your way home, the hands that were once shoved into his pockets now held a warm drink and your own warm hand in comfortable silence.

----

You awoke to the smell of coffee wafting through the apartment. Christmas Eve, the day to wrap all of the presents you had meant to wrap the evening prior, a task that needed to be done before you left for your family's home.

You stretched yourself awake, abandoning your bed to make yourself not look such a mess before making your way into your shared living quarters. You eyed your phone, the time still quite early.

"Good morning Levi." you said, pouring yourself a cup of the still hot coffee. He muttered a good morning back to you, typing across the keyboard on his laptop once more.

"Got any plans for the day?" you asked him, elbows leaning atop the counter he currently sat on the other side of. His eyes met yours as he shook his head.

"You're looking at them." he responded, and you remembered your similar conversation the evening prior. Did he have no family to go home to? On his birthday? Maybe they lived close and he'd go the next day.

"How about you?" he asked, eyes still scanning the laptop screen. You shrugged.

"Wrapping presents and driving to my family's house. I haven't seen them in a while. I'm pretty excited." you spouted, rambling on about your family to him. You noticed halfway through he had stopped typing and removed his glasses, fully intent to listen to your words.

"What's your family like Levi?" you asked. Any more hints to get an idea as to what you could get him for his birthday tomorrow may come from information on his family.

"I don't have one." he responded. Your eyes widened, taken aback.

"What do you mean?" you asked in thought. Before he could respond you realized the insensitivity of the question. "Never mind you don't have to answer. I'm prying." you answered yourself.

"It's alright. I don't mind telling you. My mom died when I was young and I don't really know my dad." he said quietly with a small shrug of his shoulders. You nodded, your eyes widening as an idea sprung to mind. His face contorted to one of confusion at your sudden beaming smile.

"Come with me to my family's! We'll be back the day after Christmas!" you shouted, your hands slapping over the top of his across the countertop after abandoning your coffee for the second time in as many days.

"It'll be so much fun I promise. they're a little crazy at times, but I don't think it's fair to spend your birthday alone Levi." you continued, almost pleading. His gaze looked to the ceiling in thought before meeting your own once more.

"Okay. Yeah. I'll do it." he responded. You squealed in happiness, quickly sputtering that you had to call your mom before grabbing your coffee and prancing off to your room, closing the door shut.

You found your mom's contact, calling her to let her know the situation. You knew how your parents were, there with open arms to anyone who needed it. And they'd be damned if they also didn't have something there for Levi as well. You had a small pull out couch in your childhood room you could sleep on, opting to let him take the bed as it was larger.

You eagerly spouted a plan to your mother, different gifts for him you thought he would like so she could purchase them. She was just as excited as you it seemed. She always loved when you brought friends home. She loved your big heart even more, which was the main reason she indulged in the company of your friends.

You wrapped your family's presents quickly afterwards, eager to drive to your parent's house in Levi's company. Once you finished wrapping everything or stuffing it into respective gift bags, you stuffed changes of clothes into your suitcase along with your laptop and other items you may need during your visit.

You re-entered the living room at eleven, Levi also packing up his needed items, a suitcase sat next to the door and you set your own next to his. You filtered in and out of your room, stacking the presents next to your cargo. Once you were certain you had everything, you quickly made a to go coffee in a thermos before grabbing your keys, warming your car up as you packed everything into it.

You talked back and forth on the way about school and the friend group you had been assured you were now a part of. You had received more than enough details about Levi to get him gifts of your own after the drive, allowing your mother to steal the ideas you had learned of him the night prior.

You and your mother decided together she could buy the Christmas gifts, and you the birthday gifts.

----

You made a quick pitstop at the strip mall down the street from your parents that you frequented as a teen. Levi walked into the store behind you, and you made the excuse that you needed to pick up one more present for your mother, Levi didn't fail to mention the large load of presents you had already packed into your car.

He scanned over a rack of clothing and you used that as your chance to hastily escape, picking up a few gifts your mother had told you she hadn't gotten yet over text.

When you were satisfied with your selection, you made your way to the front to pay and found Levi quite easily in the shop, letting him know you were finished.

You ran back to the heat of your car, the remaining five minutes of your drive felt so long.

----

As you pulled into the driveway, you beeped the horn of your car lightly to let your family know you had arrived. You parked and exited the car as your parents and four year old younger brother stepped onto your porch. You little brother beelined it for you and you laughed, kneeling down to his level. He jumped into your arms and shouted your name. You spun him around and hugged him tightly, balancing him atop your hip bone with one arm, leaning in to hug your father.

Your mother made her way to Levi, letting him know how happy she was he could join you to see your family and that he was always welcome. Typical motherly things you always appreciated about her. You watch as she gave him a hug and smiled, a soft smile making it's way across his lips as he conversed with her.

Your father helped you unpack your car, grabbing your suitcases and setting them down. He handed a present to your brother, ensuring him the sole responsibility to make sure it got under the tree safely, allowing him to help in bringing yours and Levi's belongings inside. Your brother nodded eagerly, excited to help. Your mother and father grabbed the rest of what you had in the car and you wheeled your suitcase inside.

It smelled of cookies and coffee inside. Your eyes met the Christmas decor littered across the house. A kids Christmas movie played at low volume on the TV for your younger brother and you grabbed Levi's arm, who had also been admiring the decor, and dragged him to the room you'd both be staying in, your childhood room.

Your mother had already prepared your room to accommodate the both of you and you emptied a few of the drawers in your dresser for Levi. You both unpacked your things and you abandoned the suitcases in your closet.

He sat atop the bed once he was finished and eyed the boyband and more embarrassing aspects of decor littered across your room. You plopped down next to him.

"Seems you were quite the fangirl." he observed. Your cheeks heated and you nudged his arm, muttering something about all kids having a fixation when they were young.

Once done in your room, he followed you to your living room down the stairs and you made your way to the tree, helping your mother sort the rest of the gifts. She went all out every year without fail, and your eyes scanned the group of gifts that listed Levi's name.

You turned to your mother and threw your arms over her shoulders, whispering a thank you to her. She nodded, spouting he was happy to do it all.

Levi made himself comfortable on the couch next to your father, who asked if he would like a beer, the TV channel changed to some sports game that was happening. He nodded, not wanting to turn your father down. You made your way to your younger brother, who busied himself with a halfway built puzzle.

You sat next to him, pulling a cushion off the lounge chair behind you to sit on. Levi eyed you as he sipped his beer, your mother bringing you a drink as well. Homemade spiked cider had become your favorite to drink on when you came home and she made it perfectly every year without fail.

You had talked to your mother about hiding a couple of your share of Levi's gifts for the next day, opting to actually open gifts for Christmas that evening so you could celebrate Levi's birthday to the fullest the next day.

After helping with the puzzle, you stood, plopping onto the couch next to Levi, watching the game with him. His knee shook up and down as he sipped the beer idly, and you set a hand atop his own, wrapping your fingers over it. His knee stopped bouncing and his gaze met yours.

"Don't be nervous. Trust me. There's nothing you could do wrong around my family. They already love you." you assured him in a whisper. He nodded, letting out a sigh.

"Sorry. Fathers make me nervous." he said. You shook his knee side to side, and his hand wrapped tighter around your own, both of your gazes turning back to the game on the TV.

After dinner that evening, gift opening commenced. You found your seat next to Levi once more, your cup of cider hot and full once more, Levi now drinking on the same thing, and watched your brother carefully open his gifts. He was calm for a four year old, not too energetic, something you appreciated about him. Your parents instilled his manners at an early age as they had done with you.

Then it was your turn. You set your cup down, carefully opening the assortment of gifts your family had gotten for you. Some new jewelry you had eyes for right after Christmas the prior year, some little plushes you adored that your brother insisted you had to have when he saw them in the store, nice stationary for school, some in trend clothing, and a skincare brand you always used.

Your mother and father opened their gifts from you, your father's a nice watch, and your mother's a necklace that had your brother's and your birthstone's embedded into it. She instantly had your father put it around her neck and she insisted she would wear the necklace to her grave.

Then it came to Levi's, whose eyes widened at the fact you had gotten him anything at all. You leaned your shoulder to his own and his gaze met yours, hands hesitantly reaching for the wrapped boxes your father handed to him.

He opened them with surprise. You had dug through the kitchen cabinets in his absence to find his favorite teas and maybe those that were of a higher price point to get him more, a nice watch as well, and nice stationary for him too as you mentioned to your parents he attended the same university.

His eyes met your own, still wide, then your parents, smiles across their faces.

"You didn't have to do all this for me." was all he could mutter out. You shook your head.

"Of course we did! Quit being humble honey! Besides, there's more where that came from for tomorrow." your mom said, walking over to embrace him once more, then your father, and finally you. Your little brother wanted in on the action, jumping over the two of you, wrapping an arm around your neck and the other around Levi's, a group hug commencing. He had already become part of the family, much like he had adopted you into his friend group.

----

The next morning, Levi's birthday, you awoke especially early, trying not to stir him from sleep as you exited your room to help your mother decorate the house for Levi's birthday. Before exiting the door, with a soft smile, you whispered a quiet happy birthday, leaving and closing the door quietly.

You had a lot of work to do, your mother already started a pot of coffee, a cup sitting on the counter for you already. You worked quietly to adorn the house in birthday decor, your mother had made a cake already and it cooled outside so you could decorate it.

You blew up balloons, careful to not let them pop. Your brother eventually awoke, helping you blow up the balloons as your mother taped the tops to the ceiling and you worked to wrap and curl ribbon around the bottoms.

Your father then awoke, grabbing the hidden gifts and placing them on your living room table. You made a cup of the tea you had gotten Levi as you were sure he would wake up soon. You changed into your chosen outfit of the day and got ready in your mother and father's room.

Levi appeared five minutes after, and you handed him the tea you had made.

"Surprise!" you shouted. He was taken aback once more, eyeing the littering of birthday decor that now sat covering the Christmas decor.

"You're insane. You really didn't have to do all of this." he said, eyes following along the decor you meticulously placed around for the better part of the morning. You received a side hug from him and something about the whole situation just felt homey and domestic. You wanted to lock it up and keep it forever.

You all worked together to prepare breakfast, your father playing a Christmas parade on the TV that your brother watched intently, already slowly eating on the first pancake that left the pan, his eyes glued to the television.

You all sat around the living room as you ate breakfast, your mother and father drilling Levi with questions about university and his graduate program. Oh no. It sounded like the boyfriend talk was upon you.

You eyed your mother mouthing a heavy 'NO' to her, smiling as your father continued rambling on. She nodded, nudging your father, who seemed to understand. You smiled, shaking your head, as they changed the subject from the impending talk.

You comfortably leaned against Levi, your father bringing the last gift to Levi out. You were most excited for this one. You had drilled Erwin fro information the night you went out together when Levi was away from your table. You sent quite a nice amount of money to your mother to have the jewelry shop expedite your order the previous morning, the main reason you had stopped by the strip mall.

"I hadn't planned on giving this to you till after Christmas, because I didn't know your plans, but here it is." you said, watching as he opened it. It was a ring, gold to match the watch your father had gotten him, with his birthstone set in the center, a script across the band you had gotten out of Erwin, a quote Levi had found in a book that he very much so enjoyed.

'Dedicate your heart." it read across the band

"How do you know about this?" Levi asked, sliding the ring onto his finger.

"Let's just say that I'm pretty amazing at grilling your friends for all of your information without you hearing about it." you responded. His eyes met yours and you smiled, your cheeks warming. You could blame it on the cider your mother made again, but you didn't think you would this time.

The look in his eyes matched that of the evening before Christmas Eve when you had gone out together, and you readied yourself to kiss him. You pulled him by the front of his sweater and captured his lips with your own.

Maybe the boyfriend talk wouldn’t be so bad if it was Levi you were with.

——

A/N: I definitely had a different vision for how this would go but I wrote it in two days in my free time and kind of hate it lol. Just straight cute fluff!! Please let me know what you think!

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