#literally dating my brother
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don’t you love missing someone who wasn’t even like…. super close to your canon source self? /s
#idk how to explain it man#but like#i have memories of being close to someone#but like we never interacted in canon#and I doubt they remember me much#but man we were so close#and I think I loved him#but yknow classic love story triangle- he’s with my brother#literally dating my brother#I’m just so augh idk man#bobby talks
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#i decided solomon gays needed one too#obey me solomon#obey me nightbringer#obey me#obey me shall we date#anyway the non-brother characters could literally reach through the screen and tear my arms off and i'd still fuck with them#sorry you cant handle morally complex wizussy this is between me and my wife solomon
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Me calling Solomon to take me back home to my boyfriends who all REMEMBER and LOVE ME and my husband Diavolo:
#what kind of place is this#Diavolo called me ugly#said he wouldn’t date a human#like my guy#we literally confessed our love before#coming to the past#discrimination#obey me diavolo x reader#obey me#obey me game#obey me brothers#obey me solomon#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me x reader#obey me x oc#obey me x mc#obey me x you#obey me x y/n#obey me imagines
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Levi: My discord friends told me I should get tested for autism
Asmo without missing a beat and looking at his phone: You should
#this literally happened to me#I’m Levi and my friend is asmo#obey me incorrect quotes#obey me nightbringer incorrect quotes#obey me leviathan#obey me levi#obey me asmodeous#obey me asmo#obey me!#obey me#obey me otome#obey me !#obey me shall we date#obey me boys#obey me game#obey me brothers#obey me nightbringer#incorrect quotes
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i keep making these instead of actual content god help me
#twst#twisted wonderland#twst meme#twisted wonderland meme#cater diamond#vil schoenheit#deuce spade#jade leech#riddle rosehearts#azul ashengrotto#jamil viper#jamiazu#azujami#jade x riddle#img post#tbh i dont actually ship jade n riddle#the concept is just really funny to me#(riddle after one week of dating jade) we have to break up i literally cannot handle the idea of floyd as my brother in law#they could be friendly exes if i really tried in my brain but i dont actually see them together#and of course the jamiazu propaganda is here. Again#i cant resist its in my veins
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satan's random headcanons
• gives you kisses on knuckles and forehead because he's a charming prince who normally only exists in fantasy. but your fantasy turns out to be real life and now he's your prince charming.
• the most decent one in the family. the first time you realize he's actually a demon is when he talked about how he was going to tortune a lower demon.
• cat café date at least once a week. if there's a new cat? he goes there everyday for a week. friend with all the cat café owners in devildom, he also has share of some cat café since lucifer doesn't allow him to have his own cat.
• always says that he's gonna snitch to lucifer if his brothers do something wrong so he can trick them to tell him their secrets then blackmails them later. succeeds every time for 5000 years straight.
• actually the best cook in the house. from desserts to main courses. there is nothing that he can't cook, as long as he has his cook book with him. he learns recipes from every restaurant he goes, takes note of them, remembers what dish his brothers like and cook them later when he's on cooking duty (also remembers what dish lucifer dislikes and cook them later). if someone in the family says the dish he cooks today good, prepare to eat it for the rest of the year everytime satan's on cooking duty. yes, he LOVES to take care for his brothers though he never admits it.
• never organize his room unless lucifer angrily and strictly asks him to (which happened a very very long time ago since he casted a spell on his door to stop lucifer from entering his room). always says "it's messy in my own way", that's true, he knows where exactly to find this things. you need to borrow some books about devildom's history? shelf 1, row 2, number two from the right side. need some spicy romance book? on the floor, the whole stack at the left side of his armchair.
• knows some very good if not the best pick-up lines. first of all, he's closest with asmo. second, he reads romance books more than anyone in the three realms. always give you the most poetic love letters you've ever received.
• acquainted with all the high-status people in devildom. some random nobel? oh, he met they once in a art exhibition 1500 years ago, just grabbed a cup of coffee with them last month. some of the most famous corps in devildom or maybe human world? he's one of the shareholders. a businessman. literally a businessman. remember the chat where he said he introduced mammon to some perfume company so he could get 80% of the profit? yes, that's the businesman of the family.
• always befriends with people who benefit him and his family. mammon needs money? he can give his older brothers some modeling gigs. levi wants some limited merch? he knows someone in the company? beel wants to go to some restaurants? he can ask the chef to come to their house. no one knows how he expand his social network this much.
• loves to give you gifts. everything. from the most expensive scarf you can find in the whole world to a cat-shaped stone that he finds on the way home from RAD. gives you everything reminds him of you.
• always loves to try new thing with you. today you two goes to the drive-in cimema, the next day he will bring you to the ocean to go fishing. but if you want to go to the bookstore and then the cat café, he's happy to go with you, it's his most ideal date too! and if you don't want to go outside? he has some very interesting book you can try to read. he.will.never.bored.you.
• so insecure, always thinks of himself as the most avarage guy compared to his brothers, and compared to every guy you know. lucifer is always at the top, diavolo's right hand man and stuff; mammon is one of the most famous model in the three realms and known for his infamous reputation; levi is so passionate about his hobby; asmo is super popular and pretty and always the trend-setter; beel is the athlete, always loved by everyone; belphie is effortlessly smart, he's just straight-up the genius of the family and also a spoiled brat. and he, the middle child of the family, an avarage guy who will never be unique enough.
#obey me#obey me satan#obey me headcanon#obey me satan headcanon#obey me shall we date#om swd#some very random headcanon i made in my head abt our favorite cat boi#again no proof-head#it is very random but in a good way i think so#i love satan being the most caring decent sensitive brother#like he literally went to pick drunk asmo and mc at the end of s1 and before that he also went out with beel to buy food for belphie#he loves his brothers too much to admit it#aww your tsundere brother satan#idk what else to tag#om satan
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Just finished watching AOSTH. Really fun an silly :)
Every Unbreakable Bond fan's dream
#sth#aosth#unbreakable bond#sonic the hedgehog#miles tails prower#text post#scratch and grounder's messy brotherhood also captivated me soooo much#look i just like guys with those parent issues ok#particularly love the part where they go to mobigypt to seduce sonic's grandpop from hundred years#and when he doesn't reciprocate grounder just goes ''hey why won't you date my sister !! >:(''#they literally call themselves brothers </3 how do people still not think that
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bro imagine you are fukuzawa and your Son comes in hand in hand with the weird racoon boy that you swear was your enemy like,, a week ago and says 'we are dating' and ur like okay! sure i can let that slide since we did kinda, sorta defeated the Guild, but then your agency doctor goes 'yeah i kiss that redhead mafia executive good morning AND good night every day" and you just gotta smile and move along bc okay okay she was originally from there okay, sure. but THEN dazai "kunikida shoot him on sight if he becomes even slightly more goofy and silly than he is now" osamu struts in with a ring and its like 'yeah so abt that Other redhead executive- ' and as you are writing your vacation notice your anxiety personified, wet cat of an employee walks into your office all shaking and goes 'i gotta tell you something but dont be mad and could you maybe please please hear me out please -'
#not to mention you yourself got a sus relationship not only with the pm boss but also with a international terrorist#like bestie id simply cease to exist at that point#it aint worth it brother#hey google half of my work force is dating the literal mafia what do i do ?#atsushi has a 10 page essay READY#everytime someone enters his officr with the words hear me out his blood freezes shshshs#married skk#<333#skk#ranpoe#yosano x kouyou#bro what is their ship name i forgor help#sskk#ada#bsd#screaming into the void#personal hc#my hc
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#poll#feel free to ask which of my favorite characters are which#and ill fully drag my cousin in his taste in men as well#and my brother who SAYS he likes strong women but has literally only dated theater twink genderfluid types#consider the violence charming and sexy one as also women covered in blood bc i ran out of space
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#feel like my relationship with my younger brother is changed completely forever not to be dramatic lol but i am sad#we used to b very close but he has kind of. found his faith again and gone full missionary christian which like. i knew meant the dynamic#was doomed lmao but actually acknowledging it makes me sad i feel like i'm grieving for the friendship we used to have even though#it is literally a me problem i think from his perspective he doesn't think anything has changed. but i feel weird about everything#also his new gf is nineteen and he is. almost 25 and i am the only one who feels weird about it like i know she's over 18 but! idk i can't#tell if i'm being overly cautious or if my gut instinct is right. my sister & her husband have a similar age gap but they met when they wer#both over 30 so like. it didn't feel weird. and i didn't feel comfortable actually seriously talking to him about it apart from the first#time he mentioned her over facetime (he went to another country to do mission stuff & met her there) so like an idiot i've just been#making jokes about the age gap becausee like. thats always been our thing lightly bullying each other lol but he blew up at me and said#i've had nothing positive to say about her since he's been back home and that he thinks i hate her and i'm out of line for constantly#implying he's creepy for dating someone younger. idk i felt like such a freak idiot horrible person about it. it completely blindsided me#bc yes the jokes were coming from a place of idk how i feel about this situation so i'm going to rely on the humour-based communication#we have always fallen back on as a safety thing but i guess i was wrong or the dynamic shifted or something anyway it's all fucked#& everyone is just telling me i feel weird out of some?? misplaced kind of jealousy thing?? because i'm 'losing' my brother to his gf lol#which does not feel right at all he has dated so many other girls and i have never had a problem it is literally the age gap like i haven't#even met this girl i'm sure she's very nice! i just worry about her being nineteen!! jesus. and yes maybe i do feel some resentment around#a brother younger than me who seems to be able to live his life with zero difficulty whilst i'm stuck being this unemployed loser who ruins#literally ever friendship & relationship ive ever had but i think thats ok right like i can't help feeling that. i don't fucking knowwww#am i just projecting all these sad feelings about our friendship dying onto his new relationship or like. am i right to be genuinely#concerned she's six years younger than him and still a fucking teenager!!!!!! i don't know
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appreciating or preferring canon more than au’s, and the rules of canon is perfectly valid
unless you get a pole rammed up your ass and try to police EVERYONE with “these characters can’t interact that way” or “she would never say that” or “they can’t do X because Y”
GOD that’s boring. that’s so annoying. that’s so close minded. it’s fanFICTION. anything can happen!!! it’s like a sandbox let people play!!!
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harry flirting with another man for a con: wait do I actually like this???
#harry is queer and you can’t change my mind#my brother you are literally lowkey in a polycule at least queerplatonically#harry is that guy that lowkey dated his best guy friend in college but then got married to a woman and forgot about it#OR#he’s middle aged and going through his queer awakening#both are valid and dear to me#harry sees the team do something like this and is like huh cool that’s fun I guess#just happy to be here#and then he has to do it one day and is like: has something been awakened in me ???#harry is my blorbo I just want to put him in a jar and shake or put him under a microscope#he fucking fascinates me#harry I want to study you like a bug#the pyramid job#leverage#leverage redemption#leverage redemption 2.09#harry wilson#harry wilson headcanons#lgbt leverage#lgbt#mine
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yall ever end up thinking back on periods of ur life and ur like. bro what
#so i dropped out of school at like 13/14 to be home fulltime to take care of my grandparents yeah yeah whtever#whats insane is remembering that when i was 15 my mom tried to arrange a marriage for me with some guy who was in his early 20s#he was the deacons EXTREMELY autistic son and we had spoken like. 3 times. it had been fine like he was pretty cool#but like. she talked me into tentatively agreeing with her. she went to talk to the deacon and everything about it#fucking hello? hello? taps the mic isaiah southern baptist child bride real?#that always pulls the same thread in my brain of how my grandparents died only a month or so apart#so the pastor had just finished doing my grandmas memorial service when we asked him to do the funeral service to bury them both together#and the first thing out of his fucking mouth was 'hah wow didnt expect to see all of you again so soon!'#and that pavilion was SILENT. besides like someone sniffling#awkward fuckhead piece of shit that guy sucked#yk he once threw away what he had written all his notes to preach on bc a gay couple had just moved to the area and wanted to try our churc#so he spent the whole time ranting about how gay people go to hell instead and they left in the middle of it crying#hell on earth.#my mom convinced him to start a school thru the church and i dont think ANY of their teachers went to college besides literally 1#bc she had just retired from the local middle school and had the free time to participate#but then i guess it all just comes back around#my brother graduated from there and became a ta when he was 18 and started dating a 14/15yo so#genuinely so glad i got the fuck outta there#what a nightmare that town was. christ
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such is the tale of a ✨chronically online hypocrite✨
#(please forgive this old folk’s rambling for a hot min bc i need to get this off my chest somehow and in some way)#tl;dr: come and get into the hw idol series!!! we have ship discourse; more ship discourse; even more ship discourse#(yes ik people should be free to ship what they do b u t claiming a noncanon ship as canon and forcing it on everyone else is. not cool.)#yes yes friday’s mv was visually cute and ino.rin’s singing was peak b u t i feel like it has caused more harm than good in some way???#i cant b e l i e v e the jp hwtwt beef over friday’s mv is still going on mannnnnnnnn#no less than 3 separate people have made posts along the lines of#‘p l s stop using [official tags] to post about *[unnamed] non-official ships* p l s there’s a time and place for everything’#and n o n e of them even remotely run in the same circles yet they’re all banded together against a *certain* group lmfao never change hwtwt#lhy (esp yhy) shippers are always at the scene of the crime mannnnnnn#i cant see anything on their end of the naval battle (has every single lhy tag+account that i could think of blocked)#b u t it’s still really funny to witness on my twtdash against my will. i think i need to touch grass#‘kyhn isn’t canon either so why do you like it while being such a hater towards lhy—‘#great question!!!!!! it’s bc (disregarding the movie) they actually interact really well together~~~ like the honeypre event y k—#and also bc yukki treats hina really nicely all the time (even when she was being tsun and literally running from her feelings for him)#a n d hina loved him for who he truly was; even before his image change arc. and she also does her best to appeal to him and such~~~~~~~#but lhy. uh. they just bully hiyo 95% of the time and while they do look out for her bc they’re pals#they’re just pals. guys. and lxl have gone ‘uwu it must be u uwu’ to each other one too many times so shoehorning hiyo between them would.#be pretty weird ngl? esp since the ‘widely accepted’ portrayal of lhy as a trio is p much just hiyo x 2 dudes who dont even like each other#and. like. a branch of such portrayals usually seem to have aizo waft away from the ‘r/s triad’ to date mona instead which is. very weird.#some people just pick and choose aizo and mona interactions dont they. all they see is the umbrella scene and go ‘ah yes. canon’#they dont even read further to see how mona doesn’t even use the umbrella after aizo leaves (clear rejection)#a n d how aizo doesn’t even remember giving the umbrella to mona + mona’s entire existence in general after that#and that’s not even counting the grudge mona refuses to let go of even after what looks to be literal months#so for certain shippers to just casually shoo aizo out of the hiyoharem and into mona’s unwilling arms for the sake of yhy is. weird.#and like. shouldn’t he and yujiro have a say in this?? they’re more interested in each other than hiyo so just how are they being commonly#portrayed as hiyosimps in fanon? im so confused… like. wouldn’t they be equally obsessed with each other (as w/ hiyo) if they were a rstrio?#aaaaaa get this off my twtdash plsssssssss pls see this post twtapp pls let this affect your dumb algorithm im tired of the ship discourseee#as funny as the ‘lhy vs the world’ naval warfare is it’s getting. um. very annoying!!!! and now im missing nagisa more than ever s o b s#plsplsplsplsplsplsplsplspls influence the algorithm ragepost; ik big brother is 👀watching👀 so do your thing—#(pls feel free to duke it out with me too if y’all read this i need my birdsite algorithm to le a r n that i dont wanna see stuff like this)
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can i have yall two cents here
#my brother has been dating this girl for two months#and is head over heels#but she’s just moved to nz#and now he’s planning to go too#as soon as this december#and i don’t want to be uncharitable but this sucks#and ffs they’ve only been together 8 weeks#idk#i just feel so upset abt it all#like i barely see him anyway but now it could be i don’t for years. all for someone he’s only just started seeing#oh btw it's all he talks abt#and he hasn't once talked to me abt the fact im moving and resuming my phd literally next month (which is quite a big deal to me)#all he cares about is this
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#thought of this while i was in the shower and cant stop laughing#currently reading a star for a summer's day#aka the fic w bartylus fake dating#and i just got to the second arc#I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING#THAT'S WHAT U CALL KARMA HAHAHAHA#i literally had to stop reading cause i didnt wanna consume a good fic too quickly 😭#now eating dinner (at 2 am yes)#and cant wait to go back to reading#anyway yes best friend's brother#still remains to be one of my top fav jegulus fics#and im guessing this fic im reading now will join the rank soon 🤭🤭#jegulus#starchaser#wolfstar#best friend's brother#love u bizarrestars
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