#listening to: take me out by aly and aj

[youruinedmylifebynotbeingreal]

Baby, It's Cold Outside

AO3

Summary: Soren is cold because of the dark magic in his body, but he has a very warm boyfriend. Corvus can't help but wonder why his boyfriend is always so cold and has inexplicable scars.

Note: I was listening to my Sorvus playlist as I wrote, and Good Love by Aly & AJ came on and I realized it fit the vibes of this fic perfectly. I then played it on repeat for most of while I was writing. So, listen to that while reading if you want the full experience.

I honestly debated titling the piece after that song, but decided I couldn't pass up a good pun.

Inspired by @multifandom-nerds-blog's headcanons that Soren is cold and has scars because of the dark magic used on him in the past. Mix that with waking up cold every morning in the winter. Thus, a fic is born.

...

Soren couldn’t help it. He was almost always freezing. The dark magic in his veins guaranteed it. 

Except, somehow, right before bed. Even in the middle of winter, he’d have to take most of his layers off before laying down, because otherwise he’d never be able to fall asleep. 

Especially if he wanted to fall asleep cuddled into Corvus; he’d quickly get too warm. Even if they ended up on separate sides of the bed by the morning (because Soren couldn’t stay still in sleep, either), falling asleep in each other's arms helped to ward off the nightmares. Half the time he even woke up with all of his blankets crumpled at the foot of the bed because he’d kicked them off. Corvus was quickly learning to keep a death grip, even in sleep, on any blanket he actually wanted to keep on him.

So, on the night of the first freeze of the winter season in Katolis, Soren went through his usual nighttime routine of lavender scented skin and hair care products. He’d already put on his lightest pair of pajamas, not thinking about the weather; his only concern had been how quickly he could get out of his heavy armor and into Corvus’s waiting arms. It was Soren’s night to be the little spoon, and it had been a long day.

Soren stopped in the doorway to their bedroom and watched Corvus, mesmerized by the way the lamplight reflected on his skin. He was sitting in their bed, under the covers, working on perfecting his next cello piece.

“You look deep in thought,” Soren said, breaking Corvus’s concentration.

Corvus didn’t look up, but he couldn’t help his smile. “I’ve got a great muse.”

Soren’s face turned red.

Corvus let the words hang for a beat before he continued. “Yeah, you know, Pyrrah’s been really inspirational recently.”

Soren had been making his way across the room and stopped. He made the confused, deep-in-thought face that Corvus lovingly referred to as his “wait for it” expression. Then came the “realization” face.

“Was that… a joke?” Soren asked after a moment, Corvus’s dry sense of humor dawning on him.

Corvus put the papers on his bedside table with a wry grin. “It was! What did you think?”

Soren practically pounced on the man waiting for him in bed. Corvus let out an “oof” of air at Soren’s landing - like a big dog, sometimes Soren forgot how large he actually was.

 “It’s not funny when you joke about me,” he pouted into Corvus’s chest dramatically, words muffled by fabric and skin. On instinct, Corvus wrapped his arms around Soren.

“Soren, you know nothing compares to the awe you inspire in me.” Corvus ran his fingers through the silky blond hair tickling his chin. Now he’d also smell like lavender all night.

Soren’s head popped up with a grin. “That’s what I like to hear!”

Corvus rolled his eyes and tried not to smile, but the corners of his mouth twitched, unable to hide his amusement. Soren let Corvus’s hand on the back of his head guide him into a gentle kiss.

“Hi,” Soren breathed when they broke apart, forehead to forehead.

“Hi.”

Soren, abruptly breaking the quiet moment, rolled off of him and scrambled under the covers. “Okay, time for bed. Hold me!”

Corvus barked out a laugh. “Geez, aren’t you demanding this evening.”

Still, Corvus did just as Soren specifically requested, quickly snuffing out his lamp, laying down, and wrapping his arms around Soren from behind.

“Well, as Head Crownguard -”

“Don’t.”

“You know you love me,” Soren said, snuggling back into Corvus’s warmth. Soren tangled their hands together and brought Corvus’s free hand to his lips, placing a gentle kiss on whatever skin was nearest as he closed his eyes.

“I really do.”

…

Corvus was used to sleeping in the roughest of terrain. On the forest floor, in the mountains, in a tree - really, just about anywhere. He didn’t even need a tent or a sleeping mat because being a tracker meant being discreet and able to pack up quickly.

What was he not used to?

Waking up with his freezing boyfriend clinging to him for dear life on a cold winter morning.

“Soren…?” he asked groggily, eyes adjusting to the early rays of sunlight shining through their window. He turned his head and met icy blue eyes. “Are you okay? Did you just sneeze?”

Soren nodded minutely, digging his fingers deeper into Corvus’s side. “Yup. Because of the light. But I’m okay, just currently feeling a bit like an icicle.”

“Then why don’t you have a blanket on?”

“Too cold to move.”

Corvus rolled his eyes and sat up. Soren whined, but due to his grip on Corvus, sat up too. Corvus reached over to dislodge Soren’s hands from his side so he could stand up to get Soren another shirt and fix the blankets, but a small “Don’t go…” stopped him.

Corvus’s annoyance melted away as he felt his heart clench.

“Darling, I’m not going anywhere, I just want to help,” Corvus said, dropping a kiss on Soren’s forehead.

Soren vehemently shook his head, burying his head in the crook of Corvus’s neck and wrapping his legs around Corvus’s, forcing him to stay down. Corvus gasped at the shock of Soren’s freezing nose and cold toes against sensitive skin. He relented with a sigh, reaching towards the bottom of the bed for the mixture of sheets and blankets that Soren had crumpled there.

Corvus brought the blankets up, tucking them around Soren as best he could, and stretched towards his folded scarf on his bedside table, sending his papers scattering to the floor. He sighed. He’d have to pick all of those up later and put them back in order.

The things he did for this man.

“Soren, I will need you to extricate yourself from my body for a moment if you want to wear my scarf.”

Soren relented, loosening his grasp by a fraction. His eyes were bright. “It’s too early to figure out what ‘extra-kate’ means, but I heard the word scarf. I get to wear it?!”

Corvus nodded. Judging by Soren’s reaction, you’d think Corvus never let his partner borrow it, which couldn’t be farther from the truth. Corvus loved seeing Soren in his scarf. It brought out his eyes and, honestly, a part of him loved knowing that people would see Soren in it and know they were together. That this goofy, fascinating man was his goofy, fascinating man. The man who balanced him out and inexplicably complemented his personality almost perfectly.

Corvus had also taken to leaving his scarf with Soren when either of them had a mission away. Soren, on the other hand, always sent Corvus with his favorite dragon plushie. Sometimes Soren would wear the scarf the whole trip. Or sometimes only at night, like how Corvus would sleep with Soren’s stuffed dragon beside him. It helped ease the ache of being apart.

Soren acted like this every time because he knew how important the scarf was to Corvus and treated each time he got to use it with reverence.

Soren finally released Corvus from his grasp, sitting up next to him, but kept their legs tangled together. Soren tried to keep his face serious, but Corvus still thought he looked like a kid about to get their birthday presents (to be fair, Soren also looked like that when he was about to get his birthday presents).

Corvus carefully looped the scarf around Soren’s neck, using adjusting it as an excuse to touch him. He couldn’t help but notice that the lightning-like scarring across Soren’s torso seemed to be more prominent than usual in the cold. He held his tongue, not wanting to ruin this moment that almost felt sacred.

But of course, Soren tracked Corvus’s eyes to his scars.

…

Most everybody knew Soren ran cold, but most did not know the reasoning. Not Corvus. Not even Ezran and Callum, who actually knew bits and pieces of the “why,” since they grew up together.

Not that he didn’t want to share it with Corvus. But his past and his family were so - ironically - cold and dark. Whereas what he had with Corvus was so good and bright and warm. He didn’t want to taint it by bringing up the past. Every other time Corvus had inquired about his scarring, he’d found a way to change the subject. Or distract Corvus with a kiss.

Of course, Corvus noticed him dodging the question, but he respected Soren’s need to reveal things in his own time. And he’d gladly be distracted by Soren’s mouth anytime.

The light filtering through the window made Soren feel… safe. Time felt like it was suspended, as if what happened now wouldn’t really count in the glaringly bright light of a winter’s day.

Which he knew was ridiculous. If this conversation was about to happen, it’s not like Corvus would somehow forget as soon as they officially woke up for the day.

But wrapped up in blankets, his boyfriend’s scarf, and with Corvus’s grounding presence next to him, Soren felt like maybe it was time.

Plus, Corvus was staring at his scars with that face he got when he was really committing things to memory. Usually he loved when Corvus looked at him with that face - it made him feel… wanted. Handsome. Precious. A thousand other feelings he didn’t have words for.

But this time, it just made him want to tell Corvus everything.

“Hey, I see you ogling my muscles,” Soren grinned, joking to try and psych himself up for what he wanted to talk about. “I’m just kidding. You can stare at them as much as you want.”

Soren followed up his statement with a dramatic flex of an arm and a wink, then a kiss to Corvus’s cheek. He could feel the heat from Corvus’s flushed face against his cool lips. 

“You know what ‘ogling’ means?” Corvus asked, raising an eyebrow once he’d managed to compose himself a bit.

“Of course I do,” he responded haughtily. “I read romance books.”

Corvus smiled softly, endlessly amused by his partner, which led Soren’s boisterous grin to turn into a genuine smile. Soren put a hand to Corvus’s right cheek and ran his thumb gently along his eyebrow scar. Corvus closed his eyes and nuzzled into the touch.

“Okay, but in all seriousness,” Soren started quietly. If he didn’t do this now, he feared he never would. “I can see the question in your eyes and I… I think I’m ready.”

Corvus nodded. He didn’t want to say anything and disturb the moment. They broke apart, and Corvus leaned back against the headboard, ready for Soren to continue when he was ready.

“So, you may or may not know that I was a pretty sickly child.”

Another nod in response. Soren and others around the castle had alluded to it previously, but he didn’t know much else.

“But what you don’t know is that… I wasn’t getting better. As a child, I couldn’t… I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t play with Claudia without having a coughing fit or walk to the kitchen without wheezing. I was dying, Corvus.”

Soren heard his childhood mantra in his head. In through your nose, out through your mouth. He felt Corvus slip an arm around his shoulders and Soren leaned into the touch.

“But then, one day when I hadn’t been able to get out of bed for weeks… Poof. It was gone. I could breathe. I could run. I was like a new man - er, well, boy. I wasn’t sure what had happened, but that was the day these showed up,” he said, gesturing to his chest. “My being cold wasn’t as bad back then, when dark magic had only been used on me once.”

Soren heard Corvus’s intake of breath, fingers squeezing into Soren’s shoulder.

“Once?” Corvus asked, tentatively.

Soren nodded. “Yup. That was… that was the first time. But I didn’t realize what had saved me from my breathing sickness until the second time. Viren never told me how I got better, and I never thought to question it until I was grown and... and truly saw what he'd turned into.

“So, this next part you’ve definitely heard about. It was when I taunted Pyrrah in that town. When me and Clauds had you captured. While you were off being your gentlemanly self, saving the day and tracking the princes - or, well, king and prince, I guess - I was… taunting Pyrrah, yet again. We got into a bit of a fight and… well, let’s just say my armor couldn’t protect me from being thrown across a field and hitting my spine against a sharp rock.”

Corvus had indeed heard about it, but assumed the stories he’d heard about Soren’s injuries must have just been overly exaggerated. He was quickly learning that they were, in fact, not.

“I was paralyzed. Clauds tried everything she could, but nothing changed. I’d accepted it. That’s when I got the idea to reinvent myself as a poet, actually. But Claudia… she wouldn’t, couldn’t accept it. They kicked her out of the doctor’s office. I don’t know what she did while she was gone, but when she came back, she had this spell that made me start moving again.”

Soren unconsciously wiggled his fingers. Corvus took that as an invitation to grab his hand. When he felt how cold Soren’s hand was, he gave it a squeeze of encouragement and started rubbing the hand between his to help Soren warm up.

“That’s when her hair started going white,” Soren continued softly. “And that’s when the scars on my back showed up. I was cold to the touch from that day on. It took a little bit for me to put all the pieces together, but I eventually realized dark magic was inside me, and it had been that way for a while. I asked Viren as much when I was still on his side, and he confirmed it.”

Soren took a deep breath. He no longer felt like an icicle, and a weight was lifted from his shoulders. “So, yeah.” He met Corvus’s eyes. “Dark magic is the reason I’m alive today.”

…

Soren had ended up in Corvus’s arms as the story went on, and Corvus looked down at him, buried under blankets, in wonder. He’d joked the night before that Soren left him awestruck, but it was truer every day. The more Corvus learned about his partner and his past, the more he admired how strong he was to get up and start every day with a smile on his face.

No wonder Soren had such complex feelings surrounding magic as a whole. Dark magic had saved him and let him stay a member of the Crownguard, but it had also taken away his family and harmed so many.

Corvus couldn’t help but be selfishly grateful for it, since it meant Soren was around to lounge in bed with him like this. He couldn’t fathom a world without Soren’s vibrance in it.

“Soren, you never fail to astound me,” Corvus said, leaning in to kiss Soren’s no-longer-ice-cold nose.

“Aw, thanks babe. Back at you.” A moment of silence. “I think. What exactly does astound mean?”

“Amazing. Wondrous. Incredible.”

Soren’s cheeks turned the prettiest shade of pink, and Corvus couldn’t help but give him a kiss. Soren shivered, and not because of the cold.

One kiss turned into multiple when Soren wrapped his arms around Corvus’s neck, fingers tangling in his hair, grasping at his back. Corvus tried to convey all of the love he felt for Soren, how glad he was that Soren was alive, into every touch of his hands, every brush of their lips.

“You know, I could think of some other ways you could help me stay warm…” Soren said once they broke apart, Corvus hovering over him. Soren followed up his statement with a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows.

“Soren!” Corvus chided, shoving lightly at his shoulder. “We have work soon.”

 Soren shrugged. “Worth a shot.”

Corvus pressed a kiss to that same shoulder, snuggling into Soren as they laid back down to rest for a little while longer. “I didn’t say never. We have plenty more cold mornings in our future.”

“Yay!”

After that, they went quiet, enjoying each other's company. Corvus lay on top of Soren, head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. That big, beautiful heart of his. It was strong and sure, even through the fabric of Soren’s pajamas. It was the most beautiful sound Corvus had ever heard.

Corvus waited so long to say anything, he thought Soren might have fallen back to sleep. 

“Darling?” he asked quietly, looking up at Soren’s face.

“Hmm?” came the groggy reply, eyes blearily blinking open.

“Thank you. For telling me. I know how difficult that was for you.”

“You make everything easier…” Soren said with a tender smile, sentence trailing off as his eyes closed once again. In moments, his breathing evened out.

Corvus brought the blankets up a little higher around them and closed his eyes.

...

Author's Note:

Thank you for reading!!

I tried to handle the topic of Soren being paralyzed as delicately as I could. I don't think he views it as a bad thing or that he was "saved" from it in the same way as his breathing sickness and I hope I portrayed that well.

Also, I personally imagine Soren's scarring to be kind of like Nora Valkyrie from RWBY after Volume 8!

My personal headcanon is that Corvus actually loves Soren’s little nicknames after they get together, but he just likes to keep them between them <3 and when Corvus is feeling especially affectionate he will also drop a pet name, which leaves Soren glowing for the rest of the day. And Corvus is almost always feeling especially affectionate when alone with Soren. Hence, multiple pet name drops this fic.

Also, Soren being a romance book reader is a headcanon originally thought up by the incredible jomipay on AO3/@halfofmysoulistrees on Tumblr. It's canon in my heart.

[man-down-in-hatchet-town]

VHSCC OH MY GOD

(no spoilers)

Starkid nation, you aren't ready.

So let's start with the obvious. Look, I spent thirteen years growing up with Starkid. That initial Michigan gang are deeply special to me and I will always miss Dylan, Brian R., and Corey in any show they aren't in. And this one's no different. But just as Janaya came in and took over Belle from Britney so flawlessly, Curt, Brian, and AJ were all WONDERFUL in their new roles. The gentle-but-high-energy, truly decent, romantic himbo charm Curt brought to our Springsteen boy Jim (you all are going to LOVE Jim, I promise) perfectly offset the defiant, sneering anger of Young Scrooge in "That Scrooge." Brian's reactions (particularly to the "rather take my own life" line) were so funny and some of my favorite parts of the show. And AJ... this is now my favorite thing AJ has ever done. And that's saying something. The smaller casting shake-up moments (Joey as Fezziwig, other little line re-distributions) were so fun as well!

The new act 1 is PERFECTION. I was actually surprised by how absolutely hysterical it was? Like, I won't tell you what was up with that clip on Instagram of Brian, Lauren, and Joey doing a freak-out dance, but I can tell you that their whole Act 1 deal threatened to steal the show every. Single. Time. I already mentioned Curt as Jim, but you will also love Della, who is so funny and real and truly carries us through the start of the show (Janaya is a STAR and she Curt have brilliant chemistry). Ali did a terrific job of balancing the sadness and hope that are both at the center of the devastating little Match Girl. And Jamie's Grandma... well, honestly I have no idea how to talk about Jamie's song without giving stuff away.

But the real star of the show in Act 1, as he should be, was our man Clark. I can't emphasize enough how much he nailed the writing of this whole new act. I mentioned that the new stuff is hilarious, but it's also deeply heartfelt, and also sad exactly when it needs to be. Like, the transition after Jamie's song? I can't really talk about it yet, but what that moment does with emotion is unreal. And, as expected, every song is a banger! My one complaint about this show, and it IS a big one, is that there is no cast recording of the Act 1 songs. I want to listen to them all the time.

But the good news is, I CAN listen to Christmas Carol as much as I want! The classic that started it all is back, with so many people reprising the hell out of their truly iconic roles (God I love the VHS Cratchits), and better than ever. I traditionally hate change, and I love the version of VHSCC Live! we already have so much, but I think I somehow loved this version even more? The staging is alive and clever and there are some additions and changes, particularly in "Final Ghost"/"Christmas Day," that frankly blew my mind and somehow managed to elevate the material even further. I can't wait for the digital ticket to come out so that I can talk about them. To put it simply, James Tolbert mastered his Starkid directorial debut like you won't believe. I'm so proud of him and grateful for the larger role he's taken in Starkid since they moved base to LA.

Also, the Ghost of Christmas Past is extra unhinged this year? Jaime pulled out all of the impish stops and it was the BEST.

Basically, everyone more than delivered. I haven't talked about Meredith yet but she rocked it in the band and continued to validate the hell out of my opinion that "3 Spirits" is the dark horse best song in the show.

And a special shout-out to June Saito for continuing to be a costuming GENIUS. I always love her work and this production is no exception. I honestly wanted to give the return of the Bob Cratchit costume its own round of applause.

You know, the world is a mess and everything is pretty much terrible. It's been a hard year in an impossible decade. But every once in a while you come across some art that takes all of that, acknowledges the truth of it, and somehow pulls back the curtains to harness the joy and hope that's still there under the rubble. To me, Starkid in particular has always been about finding and holding onto the hope and the beauty and humanity that allows us to endure an existence that can so often feel bleak. And VHSCC is maybe the most perfect encapsulation of that idea.

So thank you Clark, James, Meredith, Brian, and everyone who worked so hard on this little bit of magic. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Let's make a little light.

[partiallypearl]

her sense of style, it really rocks (lucy stone in the style of claudia kishi)

a/n: this, my friends is the result of a roadtrip to montana, a very bored pearl, and my slight obsession with lucy stone, early 2000s pop punk, and how female characters get mistreated in childrens tv shows. trigger warning for mention of beau being a jerk (him trying to take things too far and lucy saying no), parental neglect, and general teen angst.

taglist: @myloveforhergoeson @raging-violets @ceruleanmusings @zackmartin @fiyero3305 @icegirl2772 @selangkir @cant-get-enough-btr-forever @bishounenbtr

lucy stone finds the linda lindas when she’s 12 and has a realization of “oh. that’s what i want to be”.

she spends the next 6 years playing the dutiful daughter her parents want while listening to paramore and all time low and sleeping with sirens in between piano, violin and cello classes.

she dates beau because her mom keeps talking about how nice that lillis boy is, and how she’s so sad that lucy doesn’t have a nice sweet boyfriend like him.

the first time beau tries to take things further than lucy’s comfortable with, she goes home and listens to avril lavigne’s don’t tell me, on repeat for two hours.

she never tells her mom what happened that time. or the next.

she stays with him because honestly in their small town, he’s the only boy she really feels comfortable with, and because breaking up with a lillis boy is like dumping a kennedy - you just don’t do it.

so they play the part of the perfect couple, lucy going to all of his football games and acting like she doesn’t hate how all the cheerleaders fawn over him, and beau going to her violin concerts, acting like he actually cares and isn’t texting whitney cooper from up his block.

the night lucy turns 18, she packs everything she owns into three bags, and looks up directions for the palm woods - a hotel for up and coming stars. she has $2000 in cash, her belongings, and the guitar her wai po bought her for her 14th birthday despite her parents dislike of the instrument.

“you are music itself,” wai po had said in her soft voice. “my lucy. my musician. don’t let your parents hold you back. promise me that.”

and she did. 4 years later, she was fulfilling that promise. no matter what happened.

lucy takes one last look at her childhood and blows a silent kiss to it. she gets into her dad’s old ford F250 lariat, and plugs in a mixtape cd that she had scribbled, lucy’s getaway soundtrack, onto and as she peels out of the drive at 2:38 in the morning, collapsed by aly and aj starts blaring out of the speakers.

she gets to la, a day and a half later. she takes a pit stop at a super 8, and runs into a rite aid and gets cherry red hair dye and a bottle of root beer.

it takes two hours to dye the streaks in her hair, and to make her feel like she can actually go outside with her new look.

she looks in the mirror and sees the red in her hair and her first thought is, i look like me. and that, is what makes her break.

not the fact that she’s 2,342.0 miles from home, or that she never technically broke up with beau or that she’s trying to keep a dead woman’s promise, but that she looks and feels like herself.

she cries for what feels like forever before she shakes her head and begins to pull herself together.

“you are lucy stone.” she tells herself, “rockstar extraordinaire. you’re not lucy from laurens, south carolina anymore. this won’t break you.”

she leaves the super 8 and finds a goodwill two blocks away and spends $250 on a brand new wardrobe. she buys rock band shirts, skinny jeans, and low neck tops that would give her mother a stroke. she buys necklaces to layer, and skull rings.

an older woman, with whispy blonde hair smiles at her in the jewelry aisle. “trying out a new look?” she asks, and lucy bites her lip before nodding. “i wish i had the guts to do that. but an oldster like me? not an option.”

she pauses looking at lucy with a critical eye before she gently places her hand on lucy’s shoulder. “you’ll be okay kid. trust me on that.”

and for some reason lucy does.

[faeryclown]

the NO-SKIP albums: a tag game 🎶💖

rules: share the albums that you can listen to nonstop. those lightning in a bottle-albums that scratch ur brain just right. every single track, an absolute banger. u could not skip one if u tried. no notes. stunning, show-stopping, immaculate. ur no-skip albums. 🔎 bonus & optional (but imo, v fun) rules: 1) add a track rec for us to listen to! AND 2) share ur favorite line(s) from that track! 👀

Thanks for tagging me @apricotdeer 🥺🤍 Sorry for taking so long. I actually couldn't decide bc I had SO MANY no-skip albums that I kept changing my mind 😭 Tagging @padawanton @highway-stars @iidsch @darkwehl if you feel like :)

🎧 album info/track recs/favorite lines under the cut

💭 Lucid Dreaming by Say Lou Lou

Fav Track: Wilder Than the Wind ↳ We'll ride the night / Every second is like I'm dying here with you

🔮 The Magic by Lola Blanc

Fav Track: The Magic ↳ But I can't find it so would you please / Enchant me? Give me a potion / For my devotion to the emotion

🪽 Saved by Now, Now

Fav Track: SGL ↳ Starry-eyed / I was young and undone / But I could have died / With you there in the sun

🌙 Threads by Now, Now

Fav Track: Prehistoric ↳ It may be different now, but the pattern won't wash out / Covers up our eyes, leaves us knots and severed ties / We follow new lines

✨ Midnight Machines by Lights

Fav Track: Follow You Down ↳ So just call me, you know I will be waiting / For you as you walk towards that redemption sound / You know I'll be the stillness when you're shaking / And when you fall overboard, I'll follow you down

💗 Love & Desire by MYZICA

Fav Track: Endless Love ↳ Run with me following the stars above / Running free forever in an endless love / Run with me

🍒 Summertime by Luna Shadows

Fav Track: Cherry ↳ 'Cause darling if you call me, I’ll come running / Just let me turn out all the lights in the dead of night / 'Cause I'm, I'm your lovely / Burning for my turn to be your one and your only / Ready for your eyes, sweet on the inside by your summertime

💀 We Don't Stop by Aly & AJ

Fav Track: Good Love ↳ So I keep waiting to touch somebody / Keep you closer on my body / To love somebody /To kiss somebody

💫 MY GOD! by Tessa Violet

Fav Track: song without a title ↳ Left my love in idle, song without a title (Here I go again, take it back what I said) / It's not love (Again, again, again) / (Never gonna play with fire) / It's just what you get (My god, my god) / Tell myself I hate you, tell myself we're made to (All my love) / Fall in love and fall apart (My god, my god)

[idmakeitbehave]

Something Wonderful and Strange {S.R.} - a Playlist

series page

listen

Jackie and Wilson ~ Hozier

No other version of me I would rather be tonight; and, Lord, she found me just in time

Heavy ~ Birdtalker

And did you lose that love? Or have you never had it? Are you feeling sad 'cause you did a bad thing?

Vincent ~ Don McLean

Starry, starry night, paint your palette blue and gray; look out on a summer's day with eyes that know the darkness in my soul

Honeybee ~ The Head And The Heart

Look around, we made a garden of the love we found

To Noise Making (Sing) ~ Hozier

You put your emptiness to melody, your awful heart to song

The Louvre ~ Lorde

But we're the greatest, they'll hang us in the Louvre; down the back, but who cares—still the Louvre

Like Real People Do ~ Hozier

What did you bury before those hands pulled me from the earth?

Burning ~ Maggie Rogers

And you said, "Let me help you wake you up. Let me help you break you up. Let me help you open up."

Angels ~ The xx

You move through the room like breathing was easy; if someone believed me, they would be as in love with you as I am

No Reason ~ Toth

And I wanna love, I wanna be touched, but softly at first

Love You For A Long Time ~ Maggie Rogers

I saw your face and I knew it was a sign; and I still think about that moment all of the time

Happy Accidents ~ Saint Motel

Ever think what if we never met? You love me, but you don't know it yet

Somewhere Only We Know ~ Keane

Is this the place we used to love? Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?

Meet Me Here ~ Amy Stroup

Find some space between your fears and doubt; it's a give and take, don't let it get you down

Someone I Know ~ Margo Guryan

Then I saw someone who happened to remind me of bein' in love a long time ago

Something Tells Me ~ BAILEN

Something tells me I could fall in love with you

Bloom ~ The Paper Kites

You fill my lungs with sweetness, and you fill my head with you

You’ve Got Me ~ The Greeting Committee

You got a hold on me; built my life around sound to keep you dancing

Slow Dancing ~ Aly & AJ

The battle outside is blazing, and all I’m thinking about is you

Nightminds ~ Missy Higgins

But I will learn to breathe this ugliness you see, so we can both be there and we can both share the dark

An Art Gallery Could Never Be As Unique As You ~ mrld

'Cause I wanna look at you when we are apart; 'cause you're not just a human being, you are art

Dust to Dust ~ The Civil Wars

Let me in the walls you've built around; we can light a match and burn them down

Apple Pie ~ Lizzy McAlpine

I found you under an April sky, and you feel like city life, apple pie baked just right; home is wherever you are tonight

First Light ~ Hozier

But after this I'm never gonna be the same, and I am never going back again

[judasofsuburbia]

how the light gets in: a fan playlist

"You're a monster."

"You're Nancy Wheeler."

read here.

listen to the playlist here.

fell in absolute love with the series How The Light Gets In by my lovely pal @fastcardotmp3 and decided to make a fan playlist!! seriously this series is so special and so poetic. it is about chrissy cunningham coming back from the dead as a vampire and nancy wheeler finding her out while she's visiting barb's grave. together, they go on a journey of self-discovery and girlhood through monstrosity. and of course, fall for each other in the meanwhile. GO READ THIS SERIES i cannot recommend it enough!

song explanations below the cut!

anthem by leonard cohen: where the fic title comes from! a slow song about life continuing to move forward even after tragedy. very fitting for this series.

just a girl (cover) by florence + the machine: of course this had to go on here! chrissy has "come back wrong" and has to rethink and relearn what it means to be a girl again and the horrors associated with girlhood.

all the things she said (cover) by poppy: there is a moment at the beginning where chrissy can't communicate to nancy yet because vecna can hear everything. but she starts to make a list of all the things she will tell her once she can speak freely again.

talk to you by ricky montgomery: kind of the same as before! they wish they could communicate with each other and eventually figure out that vecna (who is possessing chrissy, so to speak) can only hear what they're saying. not see or read. so they end up writing down notes to each other to avoid vecna ruining their plans.

seventeen by sharon van etten: this one is kind of more vibes but basically reminscing on the girl chrissy once was and how she's growing.

way of nature, way of grace by aly and aj and joy oladokun: soft love song that explores the growing fascination the girls have with each other and the admiration of beauty through the pain/ the horrors.

girls against god by florence + the machine: ONCE AGAIN of course this had to go on here. florence just gets troubled girls<3 something about taking the reins of your life even when everything feels out of control.

please, please, please let me get what i want by the smiths: it's explored in this fic that chrissy struggling to want things and nancy being so giving to her, unselfishly. it's so beautiful :,)

hungry eyes by eric carmen: WOO MONSTER SONG basically here for the vibes of monster girl finally getting to consume. and definitely looking at nancy with hungry eyes.

i'll be here in the morning by townes van zandt: nancy promising that she will be back for chrissy time and time again :,))

leonard cohen by boygenius: kind of just for vibes but because the title song is leonard cohen, i thought it fit! it's about that particular song and getting lost in your happiness<3

waiting for a girl like you by foreigner: some 80's vibes now!! basically following chrissy never understanding her attraction to men but everything finally starting to make sense once she gets close to nancy.

me and the devil by soap&skin: nancy's defense song! it takes a lot of convincing from her to the group to let her take care of chrissy. this song explores following the devil and not being able to explain why you need to<3

lay all your love on me (cover) by pale honey: felt fitting for their first kiss in the woods up against a tree. dot wrote the emotion and desperation in this scene SO WELL!!

i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie: kind of an overall vibe song but also relates to chrissy going through the upside down again to help save max and destroy vecna. willing to go back to hell in order to find her autonmy again<3

NFWMB by hozier: also a first kiss song after chrissy tears apart a demogorgan to save nancy phewwww<3 but also just general vibes of them protecting each other from the others who don't understand!!!

fade into you by mazzy star: ties into the irreplaceable bond that chrissy and nancy are making with each passing day. they're fading into each other.

to be alone with you by sufjan stevens: chrissy is craving genuine alone time with nancy like how it was when she first found her<3

like lovers do by hey violet: sexy spooky song ooo!!! i would relate this one to the way they can't keep their hands off each other once they get a taste you know ;) that's just how lovers do!!!

the way i feel inside by the zombies: a soft love song about deciding whether or not to speak their feelings. nancy and chrissy spend time in this fic finally being able to speak their mind and their desires (esp for each other! eep!) and being frightened by the power but also enlightened.

[bittcrsuite]

i appreciate that. it was definitely tough as a kid but it doesn’t effect me much now, thankfully. 

that was a bit of an understatement — harry often thought about how different his childhood was from others. he uses the hurt in his art, tries to use it in his favor. he can’t share that with mari, though. he doesn’t want all the questions that come with finding out that he’s an actor. asking for tickets to his shows, wanting to know celebrity gossip — it was the very reason he had a profile in spaces like chatnow! he didn’t have to be entirely himself here.

connecticut is nice, so is new york. unfortunately, if you lived in the city, you’d definitely learn to hate christmas here. the subway is constantly packed with tourists and my usual coffee spot is always full because everyone wants hot chocolate.

i’m being a pessimist. thank you for romanticizing the holidays here — i’m going to keep what you said in mind when christmas rolls back around.

he glanced at the time on his computer as he pressed send. shit — time got away from him. he pulled out his script, half reading as he waited for a response from mari. he was enjoying himself. the last thing he wanted was to say he had to go, then never hear from her again. his lines could wait — there were others in the cast that phoned it in daily and they did just fine. harry could enjoy himself for one evening.

my sister used to blast sk8r boi on repeat when we got ice cream. i’m glad that’s a universal experience. she played a ton of aly & aj, too. i still can’t listen to potential breakup song. she played it so much that my brain can’t take it. pennsylvania sounds like fun. do you still live there, or have you ventured out of the midwest?

you have probably heard this a lot while growing up, but i am sorry to hear that you dealt with that in your youth. i know it's not an easy thing for a child to experience.

although they had just started talking, mari appreciated the more intimate details that he was talking about. like they were in person, talking to each other and getting to know each other. although part of her believed that they would probably never meet, it felt nice to be able to have a real conversation with someone about real topics - whether that be something personal or what their favorite song was that evening.

i think i've been to connecticut a few times. i travel a lot throughout the year, and the people seemed lovely each time i've gone. do you enjoy living in new york? new york during christmas has always been magical for me. the snow on the ground, the twinkling lights, the smiling faces on those who just had a hot cup of hot chocolate. it seems surreal to me.

mari sat with the last message for a moment, trying to determine what details about her life that she could give him. it wasn't exactly like she wanted to talk about how she grew up under a fake name and built a following and a life for both herself and her parents. almost like she didn't have a childhood at all. she didn't want to completely lie to him - but she didn't want him to know her true identity (at least - not right now). finally, she began typing again.

i grew up not too far from new york, actually. pennsylvania. very fun state, i know. i feel the same way you do about how different music brings different memories. growing up and listening to avril lavigne blasting through our car radio while my mom and i drove down to get ice cream after a long day. these artists have a hold on our childhood and they never know.

[starrysamu]

take (me) out. 

miya osamu x f!reader.

wc: 2.2k, fluff.

how you go from being a regular at onigiri miya to regularly grabbing takeout for you and the restaurant owner. 

for @keiyoomi​, happy holidays dear! sorry it’s a little late, but i hope you can enjoy it some. much love, your hqc secret santa ♡ 

“let me buy you a meal.” 

osamu presses his palms to the table as he leans forward. the 30 inch table hitting your thighs is big enough to seat four and yet it’s a barrier that dissolves as soon as his nose is less than a few inches away from yours. 

he peers at you through his eyelashes. “come on. a treat for my favorite customer.” his voice is all things low and enticing, luring you in like a siren.  

your eyes are threatening to roll but they can’t seem to tear away from him. one way or another, you manage to rasp out, “i’ll think about it.” 

he’s far too close. too close, so much that you think he’ll be able to hear your pulse skyrocket. yeah, the food is amazing, but you stick around for the sort-of-friend and extremely attractive owner who’s got you trapped in his clutches.   

the corner of his lips curve up. “so it’s a date then?” 

“definitely not,” you huff, hiking your bag over your shoulder. your voice shakes a little and you’re trying your best not to let it show that your heart is doing jumping jacks and your stomach is flipping over like a pancake. 

it’s been almost 10 minutes since you told yourself you’d leave but your feet are practically shackled to the ground. it's also been 10 minutes since the place closed, leaving only you, the restaurant owner, and the poor part timer he hired a few weeks ago behind. 

there’s an odd sense of deja vu that consumes you. the two of you have definitely been in this position before, just without the fresh faced high schooler hanging around the back. 

“think about it,” osamu says, standing up straight. you straighten your back with him, forgetting how tall he was. curse his blessed genes.  

but while you’re busy cursing those divine genes (jeans?) of his, you do think about it. the line between friendship and dating is thin, and you’ve always thought you’d already crossed that point with him - that you learned too much about each other in just a few short weeks, crumbling any sort of potential to date him. 

you can’t help imagining it nonetheless - the fluff, the slice of life. it’s just too ideal, and you have no choice but to imagine since it’s not actually panning out. 

your lips tighten as you squint at him. he stacks his bowls up and it sounds like the world’s saddest song, truth be told. 

is he the friends to lovers type? 

you sigh heavily and set your bag back down, walking back to the table. “fine, yeah,” you mumble, heat rushing to your cheeks. “tomorrow at 7. the ramen place across town?” 

he grins loosely and you swear the corners of his eyes literally twinkle. how’s that even possible?

“you’re here early.” 

you shift on the balls of your feet and click your phone. “traffic was light.”

a half truth, half lie. it just feels like you’ve been injected with adrenaline and cortisol and you’re ready to bounce off of every wall known to mankind with how nervous you are.   

you’re fine. 

osamu hums and slips his hands in his pockets. you blink at him for a moment. what if he’s just the friends to friends type? you’ve always hated dtr, but what if he really is just treating his favorite customer? 

“what’re you looking at? do i have something on my face?” 

“tch.” you roll your lips under your teeth and swallow your smile. “you look out of your element.” you can’t deny that the black t-shirt suits him well enough, but this baby blue linen button down is a gift from the gods themselves. 

“next time i’ll grab that perfume,” he jokes sarcastically, “the one that smells like rice. that’ll make you remember how hard i work.” 

fighting your smile this time is a lot more painful. “i never said anything about how you slack off at work,” you lilt. “your poor part timer can attest to that.”  

he pokes the temple of your head and you laugh as you push the double doors to the restaurant. the bells jingle and you feel completely warm, inside and out.  

the receptionist seats you at a booth next to a window adorned with fake flowers. what kind of cottagecore fantasy is this? 

you glance at osamu, working on making a judgement of the place himself. is he into cottagecore? there’s not a moment to spare as your eyes rake him up and down - he’s definitely light academia. maybe dark academia, even. 

the booth feels stuffy with just you and osamu there. you clasp your fingers together under the table and goosebumps travel up your skin. 

a pretty twenty-something year old slips your menus on the table and osamu flashes her an easy smile, like he’s a model for hollister or something. your eyes grow wide for a minute and you glance back and forth between osamu and the waitress. 

you’re not even sure what they’ve said to each other because your mind is all white static. and when she says, “let me know if you need anything,” to osamu and osamu only, it feels like you’re the one who’s figured out e=mc2 instead of albert einstein. 

“why are you flirting with the waitress?” you whisper when she’s out of earshot. you’re not even sure what you feel, but you think your soul has completely left your body. 

you’ve always hated this trope too. 

he takes a sip of his drink and for a split second, you can see him poorly trying to hide a laugh. “who else should i be flirting with?” he finally deadpans. “you? you said this wasn’t a date.” 

“oh, so now you’re trying to get hung up on technicalities.” you lean back in your seat and fold your arms over your chest. 

osamu rests an elbow on the table and puts his hand on his chin. “so, are we having a date then?” 

there’s that indescribable ambivalence that floods you once again as soon as you look him in the eye. his eyes are unchanging - they look at you like they’ve always looked at you since you regularly showed up to his restaurant, since you became his friend, and since you accidentally stayed just a little too late after his restaurant closed.  

you toss your straw wrapper at him and avert your gaze back to your lap. “definitely not.” 

the door handle feels cold as you twist it. so it’s a friends to friends type of story? that’s fine. not the way you wanted it to pan out, but at least the date was good for one thing. osamu’s as good a friend as he probably is a partner. 

you sigh. you’re doing a shit job of convincing yourself, that’s for sure.  

“welcome in - ”

osamu’s grin wavers and then falls into a simple smile, like he’s been waiting for you. you wish your heart would just do the one job it has: beat normally and consistently. yet every time you look at him, it wants to participate in a ballet competition or something so ridiculous to the point where your lungs are struggling to keep up. 

“look what the cat dragged in,” he says, walking up to you. “i was wondering if you were coming today or not.” 

he’s back to wearing his black t-shirt and nothing has felt more familiar to you. 

“why wouldn’t i?” you test. you’re not even sure what you’re looking for by asking him, but you’ll consider even a response as the slightest win. 

he gauges you for a moment. “i thought you might’ve left me for the place across town.” 

and now you pray for your mind to do its job: objectively process and synthesize information. instead, you fixate on how he’s used the word ‘me’ instead of ‘us,’ as any owner would when he’s talking about a customer. 

“i would never,” you say breezily. “this place is the one and only for me.” 

he does nothing to hide his smile. “and what about me?” 

your brows shoot up the same way your pulse does, as if it already didn’t feel like you were running a marathon. “what about you?” 

you’re playing a dangerous game and toying along the line of dense, but maybe you’re better off establishing boundaries before you go into v-fib. 

he sets his tray down and slips his hands into the apron loosely tied around his waist. in any other world, you’d think it would be impossible for an apron to accentuate his broad shoulders, but this world seems to defy you day in and day out. 

there’s a sharp inhale as he leans against the table. for a moment you think he’s going to follow with, ‘when am i going to be your one and only?’ but you breathe in relief when all he says is, “this place is always here for you.” 

even that sends you hurtling down a cascade of different feelings, though. each conversation with osamu seems to be a different boss battle you don’t know how to defeat. 

“thank you,” you finally say curtly, setting your things down. "what’s the special for today?” 

he grins. “you can have me, or i guess i can make you some food.” 

just when you think you’ve dodged him, he comes back at you, swinging at full force. 

“okay, fine.” 

osamu’s brows arch as he watches you stack a few bowls up. 

“i’ll buy you a meal,” you sigh, looking up at him. “sure, maybe that high schooler’s been slipping me a boxed lunch every time i swing by before work.” 

you’re really just trying to catch osamu before you start your monotonous days at the office, but he’s always holed up in the back. honestly, you’re there more than you’d like considering you swing by in the evenings now too.  

“do you know how heartbreaking it was for me to hear my favorite customer’s been stealing from me?” he says dramatically. 

“you should really talk to that kid in the back,” you mumble, looking away from him. “i always thought you allowed it.” 

he pokes your head and you roll back on your heels. “i don’t even give my brother free food.” 

“stingy,” you huff, looking away from him. you’re conflicted between guilt and disappointment - clearly, this friends to friends storyline is a little more than you can handle. 

you fight the urge to gasp to yourself. what if it’s an unrequited love? 

he grabs the tray full of stacked dishes as he smiles at you, heading to the back. you watch as his biceps peek out from underneath the sleeves of his fitted shirt and you think that maybe you should save the drooling for the food and the food only. 

he sticks his head out from the back. “what’re you doing right now?” 

you look around the empty restaurant. “it’s 10 pm and i’m here, does it look like i’m doing anything important?” 

“you wanna try something i’m adding to the menu?” 

your eyes light up like a five year old on christmas morning. “so you’re giving me free food then?” 

he pretends to think about it for a minute. “only if you’ll take me out tomorrow.” 

you agree as if you hadn’t been thinking about it all along. 

osamu leans back in his seat as he takes a swing from his bottle. “this is what you meant by taking me out tonight?” 

“come on,” you say. the cocktail against your lips is especially sweet with osamu sitting next to you. 

he leans in towards you. you’re surprised that you no longer feel like you’re running a marathon, but your muscles still feel sore, like you’ve got knots everywhere that you can’t seem to untie. 

“i guess i’ll let it slide this time,” he teases gently. “you owe me food though.” 

you pucker your lips. “i guess i’ll spare some time for you.” 

“you should, considering you stole all that food from me.” 

“it was only two lunches,” you whine, holding up two fingers for added effect. “consider it your repayment for all those evenings i helped you out.” 

he laughs and the dull ache in your chest tightens. mutual pining would be the most ideal, but right now you’re stuck on unrequited love. you’ve long ditched friends to friends because only god knows you can’t seem to keep yourself together around the restaurant owner. 

but when he says, “you know, i’d been wanting to ask you out for forever,” you feel the gears click into place. “and not as my favorite customer.” 

you choke on the martini. why won’t it go down as easy as the words coming out of his lips? 

his eyes crinkle as your vision blurs. maybe you are running a marathon when you’re next to him, because you can’t ever seem to catch a break. the dim lighting of the bar does nothing to slow your pulse either, with almost every nerve running haywire. 

“and i know we just talked about you buying me food again,” he says slowly, “so would you like to come by tomorrow night?” 

if a bar was the secret to this recipe, you would’ve brought him much sooner. “i should’ve bought you a beer a million years ago then,” you mumble into your drink. you look at him through the corners of yours to see him smiling expectantly at you. “but i think i’ll take you up on that offer.”  

and that’s how your friends to lovers, mutual pining storyline has you bringing takeout to his apartment after he’s had a long day at work. maybe you’ll even get to explore ‘and then there was only one bed,’ but you’ll take it one bit at a time.  

[youruinedmylifebynotbeingreal]

Nobody Got You the Way I Do

Chapter 3: Hold Out Your Arms and Catch Me

AO3

Summary: 5 times Corvus tells Soren "I got you." 1 time Soren tells Corvus "I got you."

Note: Listen to "Hold Out" by Aly & AJ while reading for the full effect🎵

…

It had been a few days since King Ezran had returned with Soren, Callum, and Rayla. They’d since had some Council meetings and history lessons going over the basics: Aaravos, the “Fallen Star” Ibis had mentioned in his warning, and how he had caused centuries of chaos for the world. How he was being kept in a prison that Soren’s family was trying to find and free him from.

How the newly named (by Soren, of course) “Dragang” was attempting to stop that from happening. They had a few days to rest before Corvus, Soren, Ezran, Zym, and Zubeia would head back to Xadia and attempt to reach Domina Profundis.

Corvus had watched Soren’s face closely during the meetings, but he’d remained stoic the whole time. Even when glossing over the fact that Soren had been kidnapped. Corvus knew that running into Claudia and finding out Viren was alive must have rattled him, but the Head Crownguard managed to keep his face expressionless. Which was how Corvus knew that Soren was most definitely not okay; but his friend had been avoiding him since. Corvus would manage to track him down, and Soren would immediately be on the move again or have an excuse for something he needed to go do.

The last time they’d really spoken one on one was their reunion when the group had gotten back. Soren had launched himself into Corvus’s arms as soon as he’d seen him, and Corvus had awkwardly patted his back, all while feeling like a missing piece of himself had been returned. They’d both just kept telling each other how much they’d missed each other and how glad they were that they were both safe.

So, Corvus was processing his worries for his friend and the world in the best way he knew how: music.

After a long day of trip planning, he’d changed into his pajamas and was ready to let the cello take charge of his evening.

Corvus was sitting in the plain, straight-backed chair he kept in his room to play his cello, tuning the instrument. Once it was sounding like it was supposed to, he started playing. He had no real song in mind, no destination, just wherever his fingers went on the instrument.

The song that came out had a haunting melody. It was sad, and almost a little bitter, but then after a few minutes, it turned hopeful.

Corvus thought it sounded like Soren.

As he reached a crescendo, he heard a knock on the door and abruptly stopped. He knew it was relatively late, maybe he’d woken somebody up. He carefully leaned his cello against the chair and opened the door, apologies at his lips.

But it was Soren. Soren, in his pajamas (Not his usual pink ones, Corvus noted. He hoped Soren would burn those after everything he went through in them.), with tears running down his face.

“I’m so sorry. I interrupted you, it’s late, I -” Soren’s breath hiccuped “- I should go. I’ll leave you alone.” He went to walk away.

Corvus didn’t react or ask what was wrong, just opened the door wider. “Don’t be ridiculous,” he said plainly, grabbing Soren’s wrist and ushering him in.

This hadn’t happened for a little while now.

The last time would have been Claudia’s birthday. Or perhaps the anniversary of the Battle of the Storm Spire? Regardless, Corvus had learned the best ways to help his friend.

Corvus didn’t say anything else, just grabbed Soren by the elbows so that they were facing each other, making sure Soren knew he wasn’t alone.

…

Soren couldn’t be sure how he’d ended up in Corvus’s room, but now that he was here, he was glad. His feet had, apparently, taken him somewhere he felt safe when his own bedroom felt haunted. Echoes of the past were everywhere, there. On the other hand, the ambiance of Corvus’s room was soothing and it all was just so very Corvus that Soren felt his shoulders relax, dropping from up near his ears to a more normal shoulder-like height.

“Soren.”

Corvus’s voice broke through the chaos in his mind. Nothing else ever seemed able to.

Soren felt fingers on his cheeks, framing his face and gently wiping away the tears as he whimpered. Soren couldn’t lift his eyes, couldn’t make eye contact with Corvus, so he just closed his eyes and leaned into the touch.

“You’re okay.”

Corvus didn’t ask what was wrong or ask if he was alright, because he already knew. He knew what was wrong, knew Soren wasn’t alright. There were no questions for Soren to worry about figuring out how to answer. Just Corvus’s never-ending faith in Soren, in the world, that it would all be okay.

Soren wanted to be worthy of that faith.

Soren reached up and grabbed Corvus’s wrists, needing something to hang on to, to keep him in the present and not drag him back to the Drakewood - or even farther back, to the foot of the Storm Spire.

Soren couldn’t be sure how long it had been, but Corvus’s fingers continued to caress his cheekbones, wiping away his tears until they slowed to an eventual stop.

“I got you,” Corvus said quietly, moving in closer now that Soren wasn’t so spooked. Soren nodded, letting out a shaky breath, and proceeded to rest their foreheads together. Corvus took a deep breath in and Soren followed suit, synchronizing their breathing. Soren could feel every exhale from Corvus blowing across his lips, and it made him want things he shouldn’t.

There wasn’t much Soren was sure about in the world at this point, but Corvus’s friendship and King Ezran’s guiding light were at the top of his list. Them, his friends, and his duty were what had kept a flicker of hope alive in his heart in the Drakewood when he’d panicked.

He felt Corvus’s eyelashes close, fluttering against Soren’s cheek.

“Thank you,” Soren croaked out, slowly opening his eyes and putting an inch between them. The lamplight setting the room aglow was comforting. He took a moment to appreciate how it dappled Corvus’s skin, enjoying the opportunity to gaze at his handsome friend as much as he wanted to without feeling embarrassed. Soren released his hold on Corvus’s wrists, which prompted Corvus to open his eyes, but he didn’t remove his hands from Soren’s face, cradling him there.

…

Corvus gave him a tentative smile. “Do you mind if I say something?”

“Go for it.”

“I hate when you avoid me.”

Soren flushed and averted his eyes. “I wasn’t trying to avoid -”

Corvus raised an eyebrow, moving his hands from Soren’s cheeks to his shoulders. Corvus didn’t want to let go of Soren quite yet, afraid he might disappear as quickly as he’d appeared in Corvus’s bedroom. “Yes, you were.”

He could see Soren’s brain working, trying to figure out some excuse, before his shoulders eventually slumped and he leaned into Corvus, whose arms moved to catch him, wrapping themselves around Soren’s waist. “Okay, fine, yeah. I was avoiding you because I was trying to avoid this.” Soren gestured to himself. “I… well, I knew you’d have questions. I knew you’d be concerned. I knew you’d want to help. I knew you’d care. And I thought that maybe I could just push everything down and not have to deal with it.”

“And how did that work out?”

Soren gave him a faux glare. Corvus simply raised his eyebrow again. Corvus knew that Soren didn’t need someone babying or pitying him. He needed loving honesty and support.

“Not well, obviously. It all… well, all those big feelings bubbled up to the surface even without Big Feelings Time.”

“Yeah,” Corvus sighed, gathering Soren close. “They have a tendency to do that.

They were silent for a moment.

“Soren… you going off like that is scary for me too, you know? And finding out that something awful happened to you and I wasn’t there for you or Ezran?” Corvus shook his head. “It made me feel useless.”

“You’re the most useful person I know. Plus, you were here keeping the kingdom afloat.”

Corvus snorted. “Please, Opeli could do that in her sleep. I think she does, sometimes. Barius and I were just here to look pretty.”

“Well, you are very pretty.”

Corvus felt his cheeks heat and he cleared his throat. Soren was obviously feeling better. “Anyway, I felt useless while listening to your reports in our Council meetings, whether I should have or not, okay? It’s my job to protect the king too, you know. And you…” A sharp intake of breath. Corvus’s hand running from Soren’s temple to the back of his head, holding him close. “You, Soren, are one of the most important people in my life. I couldn’t be there for you in the Drakewood -” Soren flinched at the word and Corvus’s grip tightened “- but I can be here for you now. So let me.”

Soren nodded into Corvus’s shoulder. “Okay.”

“When I say, ‘I got you,’ I mean it. I’m here to catch you when you fall, both literally and metaphorically. So let me catch you.”

Soren nodded again, looking away as he asked, “Can I stay the night?”

Corvus couldn’t help the grin that came to his face. “Always.”

…

They finished getting ready for bed. Soren used a toothbrush that Corvus had started keeping in there for him. It was all so adorably domestic that Soren’s heart yearned for this nightly, as he watched Corvus wrap a protective cloth around his locs.

Then, Soren told him everything as they laid in Corvus’s bed together. From the moment he and Callum (and Bait) jumped on Pyrrah’s back in Katolis, to when they landed back at the castle with Zubeia.

Soren stared at the ceiling while Corvus stared at Soren. It was easier to do this if Soren didn’t have to see his reactions. Corvus listened, mostly silent. He couldn’t help the string of curse words he said when Soren recounted Aaravos’s taunting, or the gasp he let out when Viren made his re-appearance. Although Corvus did also chuckle at some of Soren’s over the top explanation of his more lighthearted antics - hitting that elf with a gourd? Undoubtedly hilarious, even if the fight hadn’t ended exactly the way Soren wanted it to.

By the end of his tale, Soren felt like a wrung-out sponge. He wasn’t sure he had any more tears left in him. Soren couldn’t be certain what time it was, but he was exhausted, both emotionally and physically. Corvus, on the other hand, looked as alert as ever.

“I know you’ve been up as long as me, how do you still look so good?” Soren whined, rolling over to face Corvus now that he wasn’t baring his soul to the man.

Corvus raised an eyebrow at him. Again. “I sincerely doubt that I look good right now.”

“No, you definitely do,” Soren yawned, moving closer. “You always look good. It’s unfair.”

Soren’s eyes started closing against his will, and he subconsciously continued to move closer to Corvus and his warmth.

“Good night, Soren,” were the last words he heard before he passed out.

…

Bonus: They wake up in each other’s arms the next morning, as they are so apt to do. Neither one of them says anything about or brings it up. Until they eventually get together, that is.

—

Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! I'm quite proud of this one, so I hope you enjoyed 😊

[slightlyrebelliouswriter23]

[puts on pjs & pops popcorn for sleepover tuesday] 9, 17, 19

*heaves weighted blanket on bed, passes out cozy socks* 🥺❤️

9. best first date?

kaitlyn, when i said i've never been romanced...... i've legit never been on an official date 😂 it's always "let's hang out" this or "wanna chill?" that. and like sometimes they're fun things that wouldn't normally be classified as "just chilling". but no one has ever Planned In Advance. no one has ever Taken Me Out i'm tired of this shit buy me flowers or else 😤🔪

17. favourite food?

anything with carbs and cheese.

19. what am i listening to right now?

the ceiling fan lmao.

SLEEPOVER TUESDAY

[gillysims]

🎶✨when u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, and  publish. then, send this ask/tag 10 of your favorite followers   (non-negotiable, positivity is cool) ✨🎶 

I got tagged by @lazarish lol FINALLY doing this sorry it took so long

1. Lucky to Get Him - Aly & AJ (I used to love them when I was a little babby and I’m so excited they’re back. This song just takes its time and is so subtle and lovely)

2. Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve - Taylor Swift (The first time I heard this song I started shrieking at the top of my lungs and I haven’t stopped since. This song is like having a blade driven into your guts.... in a good way)

3. Gasoline - The Weeknd - (Turns out I like the Weeknd a whole lot more when he gets weird. One of my favorite song tropes - a brutally naive and untrustworthy narrator)

4. Tropic Morning News - The National (I can’t wait for this album! Please destroy me Misters Dessner!)

5. Mother’s Daughter - Miley Cyrus (”Flowers” encouraged me to finally check out some of Miley’s back catalogue and this song is SO good)

I tag @frizzyfruitydrink @siminycricket @disasterbri @diaryofthecoolestgirl @monets-pixels @bumblingbunny @xiapxls @sweet-berry-sims @cactusblossomsims @faetheegrey

[flieslikeamoron]

@skystamp tagged me and it took me a minute, but here are five songs I've listened to recently. 

Let Me Down Easy - Daisy Jones and the Six

I watched the show, and it's fine. The ending was lame, but I liked it okay otherwise. Riley Keough and Nabiyah Be were very good. And yes, I listened to the album by this fake band. It's also fine. You might as well just listen to Fleetwood Mac, honestly. But it has some catchy tunes. I generally like the live versions from the show a bit better than the polished "album" versions though. 

Waffle House - The Jonas Brothers

I'm still vestigially in Jonas fandom. It was never really about the music for me, I was in it for the fic. And for the codependent brothers. (Except I did love love love the DNCE album. Suck on that, Nick! Joe was secretly the most talented one all along!) But yeah, my favorite albums from my Disney era were Demi's Here We Go Again and Aly and AJ's Insomniatic. So although I still have feelings about the Jonas Brothers, they're not really much about the music. I still listen to their stuff though in the way that you might listen to music put out by someone you went to high school with or used to date or something. This one is fun, but I hate that one line about "headstrong father and a determined mother." It just hits my ear wrong rhythmically.

Fistfight - Ballroom Thieves

I added this one to my steddie playlist a while ago, and I listen to it pretty often. I really like the dirty groove of it, and the soar of the chorus. Love the line: They said love is grabbing blindly at a pit full of snakes/And wait to feel the only heel among the rows of all the venomous teeth and of course the chorus: You were a bright light/You were a fistfight. IDK I think that fits the way I'm writing them.

I'm a Man - Adam Lambert

This is from the covers album Adam put out recently. I don't like the Sex on Fire cover at all, but the rest is good. I think my faves are the Beatles-esque take on Getting Older, a sexy cool I Can't Stand the Rain, and a moody and modern Do You Really Want to Hurt Me that I like way better than the original. And this one, which is from Jobriath. He was an out gay rock musician in the early 70s. He had a big contract and a lot of marketing hype, and then his first album bombed, and he got basically abandoned by the industry and died of AIDS. Anyway, the Jobriath album is pretty much aping Ziggy Stardust/Bowie. Especially vocally. And it has several "space man" songs. But I kind of get more Elton John vibes overall. Jobriath was a pianist, so it's a lot more piano heavy than Bowie and it has these musical theater/showy/operatic tones. Like there's one song Movie Queen that just sounds like vaudeville/cabaret, not really "rock." Aaaanyway, Adam's voice is always A+ and you can tell he relates to this song. It's a great cover.

The One that Got Away - The Civil Wars

I guess Daisy Jones put me in the mood for fraught band relationships and tangled up feelings. This is so pretty and haunting. And I love that complicated dynamic of it was easier when it was just pining, and it was all potential, and it wasn't this hard, real thing.

[phoebe-delia]

Has anyone asked for song #1 yet? I'm very curious which song you're listening to most.

I really enjoy your writing in combination with the song prompts! Thank you for sharing it with the world!

Hello darling! Thank you for this ask. As a matter of fact, no one has requested 1!

My number 1 song is the explicit version of "Potential Breakup Song" by Aly and AJ.

I know, I thought it would be a Taylor Swift song, too! I will say, this playlist was from Apple Music and I recently started using Spotify more so idk if this is still accurate for my current No. 1 song, but it's still a bop.

This is a bit of a challenge, but I figure if I can write a fic based on "Yeah!" by Usher, I can give this a try. This fic will be *mostly* funny and fluffy but there's some angst with a happy ending.

5 Times Draco Almost Broke Up With Harry

1.

"Tell me something," Draco said shyly, tracing patterns into Harry's bare arm. Sunlight streamed into the living room, dust motes dancing in the rays.

"What do you mean?"

"Something I don't already know about you."

"Like what?"

Draco's expression turned exasperated. "I don't know, Harry, that's rather the point."

"Right...er, okay, here's something you don't know about me. I don't like whipped cream."

Draco looked at him, startled. "You don't?"

"Er, no. I also don't like marshmallows or--"

"What?"

"Or avocado, or eggs."

Draco sputtered. "What is wrong with you?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "Merlin, here we go."

Draco narrowed his eyes. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Every time I tell people the foods I don't like, they get all indignant and huffy," Harry waved a hand. "It's so weird. Like I've offended them by disliking meringue."

"You don't like meringue?! That's it, I'm breaking up with you."

Harry groaned. "I regret this. I regret everything. Just--forget it."

Draco sighed. "No, no I'm sorry. In my exaggerated teasing, I see how I might've struck a nerve."

"It's fine--I'm just tired of people taking my food preferences as a personal insult."

"I take everything you do as a personal insult."

Harry just chuckled. "That you do, Draco, that you do."

2.

"POTTER!!"

"WHAT?"

"GET IN HERE!"

"WHERE'S 'HERE'?"

"TAKE A WILD GUESS, AUROR POTTER!"

....

"Ah, good to see that your tracking skills aren't too hopeless. Now, care to tell me what's wrong with this picture?"

"Er...you're angry?"

"Yes, I am angry--and the reason for that is obvious if you merely look around the room and see if you can identify what might be bothering me."

"You get really formal when you're upset."

"Potter--"

"And you call me Potter."

"If only you would use your powers of observation for discovering the cause and not the symptoms of my frustration, this conversation would be over."

...

"Is it my socks?"

"Your socks, your pants, your shirt, your trousers--all in a heap in the closet."

"So? I haven't done laundry in a while."

"Potter, you do realize there are laundry spells, don't you? So that dirty clothes don't stink up one's closet?"

"...No?"

Sigh. "Alright, I suppose I won't move out this time."

"Oh, what a relief."

"Was that sarcasm?"

"Never. Especially not toward you, baby."

"I should hope not. Now, c'mere and let me teach you the spell."

3.

"I can't believe you'd betray me like this." Draco shook his head mournfully, bits of snow falling from the top of his warm hat. "I trusted you."

Harry scoffed. His breath fogged in the air. "I told you this was happening today. It's not my fault you weren't listening."

"Asking me post-coital if I'd like to attend the Weasley Family Brunch is Slytherin-level manipulation."

"Did I ever tell you the Sorting Hat almost put me in Slytherin?"

"What?" Draco stopped walking, turning to Harry in shock.

"Yeah. Told me I'd do well. But you'd been such an arse to Ron that I begged it to sort me anywhere else."

Draco rolled his eyes. "Of course. Honestly, I did you a favor. You were practically made for Gryffindor."

"Who knows? Maybe we'd have been friends back then."

Draco glared and Harry snickered.

"You know, Potter, between your little jokes and this stunt you pulled, I'm one insult away from Apparating on the spot and leaving you here."

Harry smiled fondly. Taking Draco's hand, he led them toward the Burrow, its warm light a welcome destination in the icy weather.

"Nah, you won't, you know why?"

"Why?"

Harry smirked. "Because then we won't get to be post-coital together."

Draco scowled. Harry laughed.

4.

"Don't say a word."

"Can I just--"

"Harry."

"But I--"

"Potter. Shut up.

...

"Draco I'm sorry--"

"Harry, what is the one thing I asked you to do when you became an Auror?"

"...Don't be stupid."

"Yes. I asked you not to do anything stupid. I asked you not to impulsively put yourself in harm's way."

"Draco it's my job to protect my partner, and--"

"You don't think I understand that? Of course I do! I can't fault you for being a loyal partner, Harry, but running into a hostage situation without calling for backup is the absolute dumbest thing you could've done! You nearly died!"

"But I didn't! And the case is over now."

"You were in St. Mungos for nearly a week! Do you know how agonizing it was to see you like that? Do you--" Draco's voice cracked and he cut himself off, turning away from Harry.

Harry's heart clenched. He walked up to Draco and wrapped strong arms around him from behind, expecting to be pushed away. Instead, Draco leaned into the touch.

"I know your job has its risks, Harry, but the least you can do is not create them for yourself. You said the Sorting Hat nearly put you in Slytherin; some self-preservation would be good for you."

Harry sighed, nuzzling Draco's neck. "Okay. I'll try."

Draco turned in his arms, looking at Harry with wet eyes. "Good. The last thing I want to do is break up with you, but I couldn't handle it if I lost you any other way, I--" The tears spilled at that. Draco's face flushed in embarrassment, in anguish.

Harry's chest constricted. He pulled Draco close to himself and stroked his hair, letting the other man cry his fears into his shirt.

"I won't let it happen, Draco. I promise."

Draco nodded, his cheek brushing Harry's shirt.

Harry smiled. They'd be okay.

5.

Draco was going to kill Harry.

He was going to break up with him, and then kill him, and then revive him just to break up with him once more.

He cast a Tempus. 8:20.

Over an hour. Over an hour he'd been waiting for Harry to return home. He was beginning to get hot in his tailored suit, despite the cooling charms.

He hadn't heard anything. No Owl, no Floo, no nothing. Either Harry had no respect for decorum or...

Nope. Draco couldn't go there, wouldn't. Harry promised and he always kept his promises.

Suddenly, the Floo roared to life, making Draco jump. Harry stumbled through with a panicked expression on his face, dusting the Floo powder from his formal robes.

"Draco! Merlin, I'm so sorry, I thought I had time and then everything got all screwed up and I got here as fast as I could."

Draco sighed. "It's fine, Harry, let's just order takeaway."

"Why?"

"Well, we missed our reservation. Cerise won't wait for more than thirty minutes."

Harry pursed his lips. "What if I had something else in mind?"

Draco narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean?"

With a smirk, Harry tossed him a hairbrush, which Draco caught with Seeker instinct.

"Harry wh--" His eyes widened as he felt the pull of a portkey, the sound of Harry's amused laughter echoing behind him.

He landed with a thud on a balcony. After a crack, Harry appeared next to him, gasping to catch his breath for a moment.

"Potter, what the fuck?"

Harry chuckled. "Surprise! Look around, Draco."

Draco's breath caught as he finally took in his surroundings. They were standing on a balcony in Paris, confirmed by the sight of La Tour Eiffel in the distance. The lights of the city twinkled like stars below them. On the balcony were two chairs and a small table with hot food under a stasis charm. A bottle of wine and two glasses sat ready for them. Draco checked the label and confirmed with a gasp that it was a 1989 Chateau Lafleur.

"Harry, I--" Draco turned around but was startled into silence at the sight of Harry on his knee, a hopeful smile on his face and a small black box in his hand.

Draco's eyes went wide. "What?" He breathed.

Harry bit his lip. "Draco, I'm sorry I don't like whipped cream. I'm sorry I forget to do laundry, and that I dragged you to Sunday dinner. I'm sorry that I worry you sometimes because my job is dangerous. I'm sorry I run late to our dates sometimes.

But I promise to give you the avocado from my sandwich. I promise to try to remember the spells you taught me, and to use my manipulative powers for good and not evil. I promise I'll use better judgment in the field. And I promise I'll try to be on time for our dates.

And I promise to do all of this for as long as I can, as long as you let me. And if you do--if you promise to love me for the rest of our lives--I promise to do the same. Draco Malfoy, will you marry me?"

Draco let out a delighted, euphoric laugh. "Yes, yes of course I'll marry you!"

Harry grinned and rose from his knee to pull Draco into a nearly bruising kiss. When they pulled apart, they pressed their foreheads together and looked as Harry slid the ring, a simple silver band with tiny emeralds, onto Draco's finger.

As they ate dinner, looking out over the city, Harry gave him a cheeky grin. "So, tell me, how'd I do?"

Draco raised his eyebrows. "With tonight? The proposal?"

"Yeah, what'd you think? I hope it made up for me being late. I'm sure you were about ten minutes from breaking up with me," Harry said with a chuckle.

Draco shook his head and smirked. "No, Harry," he raised the glass of wine to his lips. "I'd never do that."

Send me an ask about Harry Potter, broadway/musicals, The West Wing, and/or Taylor Swift! Or just about life in general :).

Also, I have a playlist of my 99 most listened-to songs of the year so far. Pick a number 1--99 and send me an ask and I'll write you a fic based on it!

[the-modernmary]

when you gonna take me out? || derek morgan x GN!reader

Summary: You and Derek have been flirting pretty heavily for the past few weeks. So when his first time asking you out doesn't go as well as planned, he's determined to get you to say yes.

Warnings: mentions of getting shot, allusions to smut

A/N: Chapter title taken from Aly & AJ's "Take Me Out". This was inspired by a scene from the show community, and also because derek morgan deserves more love

~~~~~~~

“No, no, you see, asking somebody out is an art,” Derek explained to a very frustrated Spencer Reid. “And I think with a little practice, pretty boy, you could become a bit of a player.”

Prentiss, who had been listening to Derek trying to convince Spencer to let him be his wingman for the better part of an hour, scoffed from her desk. “Using a cheesy pickup line is an art now?”

“There is nothing wrong with a line!” Derek argued, leaning back in his desk chair. “It’s a knock at the door. And once they let you in, that’s when you strike.”

Spencer scrunched up his nose at Derek’s phrasing. “I think I’m going to leave the whole player thing to you.”

“Come on, Reid, it’s easy.”

“If it’s so easy, then why don’t you show us?” Prentiss shot.

Right at that moment, Garcia and JJ walked back into the bullpen, coffees in hand. “Show us what?” JJ questioned.

“Derek is trying to teach Reid how to flirt,” Prentiss explained. “But I think he’s just all talk. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Morgan with a significant other.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Hey, I don’t pry into your personal life?”

Garcia put a comforting hand on Derek’s shoulder. “Nobody can resist my chocolate thunder. I mean, look at him. He literally looks like he was sculpted by Michaelangelo.”

“I’m with Emily,” JJ chimed in. “I kind of want to see the Derek Morgan in action.”

Derek’s eyes scanned the bullpen until he landed on you, standing in the kitchen area and making yourself a cup of coffee. You were also a profiler, just on a different team that primarily focused on cold cases. It was no secret that you and Derek Morgan had been flirting pretty heavily the past few weeks — longing glances, pet names, and kisses on cheeks were just the start — and you both had a sneaking suspicion that there was an office pool betting on whether or not the two of you had already hooked up.

“Fine,” Derek said, standing up. “Watch and learn, Pretty Ricky.”

Derek sauntered over to the kitchen and leaned against the counter while reaching for a wooden stirrer. “Let me help you with that,” he offered.

You turned to look at him, a smile on your face. “Wow, what a gentleman,” you teased, but you handed your cup of coffee to him anyways. “I didn’t realize you knew how I take my coffee?”

“You learn a lot about somebody when you can’t take your eyes off them,” he pointed out. “Especially with the way you look right now. I mean, wow. Got a hot date tonight? Because he is one very lucky man.”

You arched an eyebrow in his direction. “Nope, no date.”

“Well, you do now, baby,” Derek grinned. “I’ll pick you up at 8:30.”

You stared at Derek, part amused and part incredulous. “Did you really think that would work?” you asked through a breathy chuckle.

Derek’s confident grin fell slightly as his eyes narrowed in confusion. “Wait, what?” he asked, unable to form any other words.

“Derek Morgan, I expected so much more from you,” you mused, snatching your coffee cup from his hand. “I know you can sweet talk better than that.”

It was Derek’s turn to raise his eyebrows, and he tried his best to ignore the barely-suppressed giggles from his teammates. “So is that a no?” he clarified, not used to the feeling of rejection. Although, it didn’t feel quite like a rejection, especially when you were smiling at him with just a hint of your tongue peaking out from between your teeth.

“It’s a… ‘better luck next time’,” you explained, taking a sip of your coffee.

Derek’s normal, confident grin returned to his face. “You’re saying I can ask you out again?” he clarified, because he did not want to be the guy who didn’t know how to take no for an answer.

You walked backwards to your desk, never taking your eyes off Derek. “Sure. It could be fun. But you’ll have to bring your A-game if you want me to say yes,” you told him, and oh, Derek Morgan loved a good challenge.

Derek walked back to his desk, feeling the stares of his teammates the whole way back.

“Like a knock on the door...” Prentiss quoted back to Derek. “So did you just get the door slammed in your face, or was nobody home?”

Derek scoffed and sat down in his chair, already coming up with all the new ways he could ask you out. He had been wanting to for a while, but the timing was always off. But now…

“Oh no, I’m in,” Derek promised, and his eyes were immediately drawn to you. He hadn’t been lying when he said that he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. “But I’m playing the long game.”

~~~~~~~

Derek and the rest of his team got pulled into a case shortly after, so you didn’t hear from him for about a week except for the occasional “how is it going?” text. They got back to the BAU in the middle of the day, but instead of heading straight home like the rest of his team, Derek made a beeline to your desk.

“Good morning, gorgeous,” he greeted, dropping a quick kiss to your temple. “Hope you didn’t miss me too much.”

A soft blush rose to your cheeks as you shut the file you were looking at, spinning your chair so that you could face him. “I missed you tons, as always. But you knew that.”

Derek’s eyes trailed up and down your body, and there was a softness to his gaze that you rarely ever saw from him. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?”

“Sore eyes?” you questioned. “I don’t know about that. Wasn’t there a meteor shower where you guys were at?”

“Yeah, but no meteor shower can compare to how beautifully your eyes sparkle.”

You tried really, really hard to hold in your laughter. You pressed your lips into a thin line and you bit the insides of your cheeks, but you were only so strong, and even Derek looked like he realized how cheesy and awful that line was.

You broke down into a fit of laughter. “I’m sorry,” you giggled, covering your mouth as you did. “I just — Did you google a top ten best pickup lines list on the plane ride back?”

Derek winced, but nodded in agreement. “That’s fair. Not my best work.”

“No, it was not, Romeo,” you said, patting his cheek. “But we’ll chalk it up to post-case sleep deprivation.”

“Don’t worry, sweetheart,” Derek grinned. “When the time comes, you won’t be able to say no.”

You laughed, throwing your head back as you did. “And I am eagerly awaiting that day.”

~~~~~~~

Two days later, Derek all but ambushed you at the elevator. As soon as you stepped out onto the 6th floor, Derek slung his arm around your shoulders, and used his free hand to carry your bag for you.

“Oh, this is exciting,” you mused. You reached your hand up to interlace your fingers with the hand that was draped over your shoulder. “What do you have for me today, baby?”

“I’ve been thinking,” Derek explained. “And you’re a modern, progressive, independent person. I think I’ve been going about this all wrong.”

You nodded in encouragement. He was so close, you just knew it. All he had to do was ask you.

“You don’t want to be dragged down by a bunch of strings. So how about you come over tonight, I’ll put on some mood music, light some candles, and you and I can have one perfect night of pure bliss.”

Or maybe he wasn’t as close as you thought.

“Nope,” you said, moving his arm off of your shoulders. You liked Derek Morgan, but you were not going to be another one of his one night stands. “Not gonna happen.”

“Better or worse than before?” Derek asked, already knowing the answer, and he handed your bag back to you.

“Worse. Much worse.” You paused and turned so that you were facing him. “But I like how forward you were. Keep that up.”

Derek smirked and leaned against the wall, his hands in his pockets. “Yeah? So should I keep those candles just in case?”

You pretended to think about it for a few seconds. “With your current track record, baby boy, the only place you’ll be using those candles is in your dreams.”

“You’re already in my dreams, hot stuff,” he promised you. “Every. Single. Night.”

Oh god, that was a very welcome image you would think about forever. You knew that Derek liked you, and you had had your fair share of fantasies involving him in some pretty explicit situations, but him fantasizing about you? It was almost enough to convince you to drag him into the nearest empty room.

Almost. Because if he wanted a chance with you, he was going to have to actually ask you on a date.

Instead, you blew him a kiss and left him with: “And I bet I’m even better than you can imagine.”

Needless to say, the both of you spent the rest of the day incredibly distracted.

~~~~~~~

By that point, pretty everybody on the 6th floor knew what was going on, and they were all invested. More betting pools sprouted up, and even some of the more reserved agents were putting in their two cents, albeit under the guise of disapproval.

That’s why, when a bouquet of flowers appeared on your desk one morning, it was all anybody could talk about as they waited for you to get to work. Even Rossi and Hotch had found an excuse to get themselves out of their offices and into the main part of the bullpen.

“They’re going to say yes today,” Penelope guessed. “They have to. Everybody likes flowers, and this shows the sweet side of my chocolate thunder.”

Prentiss scoffed. “I hope they don’t. I have twenty bucks on at least two more rejections.”

Rossi, who was sitting on the edge of a desk, shook his head. “These are your friends. Don’t you guys feel bad about betting on their love lives?”

“Says the guy who has fifty dollars on ‘they get drunk and leave the bar together’,” Hotch said, not even looking up at the file he was skimming through. Hotch was one of the only ones who hadn’t put money into this whole thing, but he was still very well informed. “You all should really hide the whiteboard the bets are on a little bit better.”

Rossi was about to defend himself when you walked through the glass doors of the BAU. A hush fell over the room and they watched as your smile melted into realization and then nervousness.

You walked over to the bouquet and gingerly took the card, but you didn’t even get to read it when the first sneeze came. Then the next and the next, and pretty soon your eyes were watery, your nose running, and your throat was so scratchy that you sounded like you smoked four packs a day.

You tried to focus on your work, but the constant sneezing and needing to get up to blow your nose was seriously disrupting your productivity. You could barely focus because it felt like a head cold that just wouldn’t go away. Your pollen allergy was something you’d had your whole life, and when they hit, they hit bad.

The flowers were gorgeous and such a sweet gesture, but you didn’t even have the chance to really appreciate them while you could barely breathe through your nose. You were sure you were just a distraction

A hand on your shoulder made you jump, and you whipped around to see Hotch looking down at you with concern. You sighed. “I’m sorry, Agent Hotchner,” you said, your voice nasally. “I usually keep allergy meds in my bag, but it’s not pollen season and I—”

“Go home, agent,” Hotch interrupted you gently. “Get some rest. You can come back tomorrow when you feel better.”

“No, m’fine I just need to—” You cut yourself off this time with another sneeze, and then all you could do was agree with Hotch. “Yeah, I’m gonna go home. Thank you.”

You took the bouquet and walked over to Penelope, handing the glass vase over to her. “Will you please tell Derek that these are beautiful and that I’m so sorry—” You sneezed three times in a row, and by then you were too exhausted to even try talking anymore, so you just groaned and waved goodbye to the rest of Derek’s friends before dragging yourself out of the bullpen.

The next thirty minutes went on as usual, until Derek walked into the bullpen. He had been gone all morning doing a profiling seminar for academy recruits, so he had missed your quick descent into your allergic reaction.

His face fell slightly when he saw your empty desk, and it fell even more when he saw the flowers he had bought sitting on the corner of Prentiss’s desk and his entire team talking amongst themselves.

Derek walked up to them, a frown etched on his face. “Did they not show up for work today?” he asked.

“I sent them home,” Hotch explained, and if Derek didn’t know any better, he could have sworn that he saw the hint of a smirk on the corner of Hotch’s mouth.

Spencer’s smirk, on the other hand, was not even close to being hidden. “Hey Morgan, did you know that pollen allergies affect up to 20 million adults? And sunflowers and flowers in the aster family are considered some of the worst flowers for people who suffer with pollen allergies, since the pollen is so easily dispersed by the wind.”

Realization set in Derek and he cursed under his breath. You had mentioned once in passing that you liked the look of sunflowers, so he had assumed that those were the best flowers to get you. Clearly, he was wrong.

Noticing his dejected look, Garcia quickly interjected. “But they said that they’re beautiful and they looked like they really loved them,” she comforted. “And they wanted me to tell you that they’re sorry.”

Derek shook his head. How did he not know that you were allergic? That seemed like a pretty big thing. “No, they have nothing to be sorry for. I’m going to go wipe down their desk, make sure that it’s clean for them tomorrow.”

The team watched as Derek went over to your desk, taking his time to make sure that there was no flower residue left. They all quickly went back to discussing the bet, changing up their predictions now that they had more evidence to go off of.

Surprisingly, instead of going back to his office, Hotch spoke up. “Morgan isn’t used to being told no. He’s going to break down and beg.”

The team looked at Hotch incredulously. “I’ve never seen Morgan beg for anything,” JJ pointed out, and Hotch just shrugged.

“Well, are you willing to put your money where your mouth is?” Prentiss pressed.

Hotch sighed and shut the file he was holding. “I try not to make a habit out of betting on my subordinates' love lives.”

Rossi rolled his eyes. “He knows he’s wrong, he just wants to be a contrarian,” he told the team, baiting Hotch.

Hotch narrowed his eyes slightly. If anybody else had said that, he would have been able to walk away, but this was Rossi. So Hotch reached into his pocket and pulled out a twenty from his wallet.

“None of this goes on any sort of record.”

~~~~~~~

“Derek Morgan, you got shot?”

You stood up from your desk as soon as you saw Derek and his team walk through the glass doors. It was way after hours, but the news of a shoot out at their last crime scene got back to you, and there was no way you were going to be able to go home knowing that Derek got hurt.

The rest of the team all shared a glance and quickly dispersed, giving you and Derek as much privacy as possible.

Derek made his way over to you, trying to look like he was in less pain than he actually was. “Don’t worry, hot stuff,” he told you, slumping down into his seat. “It just hit my vest.”

You stormed over to where he was sitting, worry evident on your face. “Yeah, I’ve been shot in the vest before!” you reminded him. “It still hurts like hell! What were you thinking?”

Derek forced a smile and held your hand in one of his own. “Baby, I’m okay. Really. I could even show you, if you wanted proof. Then you can stare at my abs without feeling guilty.” He took his free hand and started to lift up his shirt, and you quickly yanked your hand away from his.

“Oh my god,” you groaned, already in the process of storming away from him. “I cannot believe that you are seriously hitting on my right now. You just got shot and you’re asking me out? Agh!”

You started to walk away but Derek caught your hand just in time, laughing as he did. “Okay, don’t go, I’m sorry. I just…” he trailed off, suddenly getting serious. “I just really needed to see your smile.”

You mustered up the best smile you could. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

Derek let out a long, audible exhale. “So am I,” he admitted. “I’ve never been more glad to be here doing paperwork.”

You rubbed your hands on the tops of your thighs. “I have some leftover takeout that I had for lunch. How about I heat that up and we can share it while I help you with your work?”

“You don’t have to stay. I’ll be fine.”

You shook your head. “No, I’ll stay. I have nothing else to do.”

Derek grinned and kissed the top of your hand. “You’re too good to me.”

You smirked. “I know.”

Pretty soon, the two of you were hunched over his desk, sharing bites of dinner and chatting easily as you trudged through paperwork.

You quickly learned that he liked to read Kurt Vonnegut and that his eagle tattoo was because of a nickname he had gotten in college. You told him about your fear of the ocean and the time you accidentally set off your high school’s fire sprinkler system during chemistry.

It was nice to be able to just talk to him. It felt like you and him had been friends for years and years, not just the past two months. This Derek Morgan was different from any other version of him, and you loved it. If you didn’t already have the biggest crush on him, this just solidified it. You really, really liked him, and you really, really wanted him to just ask you on a date already.

As the night went on, the two of you had moved closer and closer, until your shoulders bumped and your legs were pressed up against each other. If you both turned your faces to look at each other, your noses would brush. And from there, it would only be a few centimeters until your lips would be on each other…

“Thank you for helping me with this,” he said suddenly, breaking you out of your fantasy. He turned towards you, and you could feel his hot breath on your neck, sending shivers down your spine. “You didn’t have to stay, but… it meant a lot that you did.”

You smiled and tried to control your erratic heartbeat. “It was no problem. I’m happy to do it, anytime. Are you feeling any better?”

“A little,” he admitted. “But do you know what would make me feel even better?”

You finally turned to look at him, and his face was so much closer than you expected. “What is that?” you whispered, unable to force yourself to speak any louder.

Derek’s lips quirked up in a smile and he moved impossibly closer to you. His lips were brushing against yours, and all you had to do was lean in just a little bit. Then he met your eyes, and they really did sparkle, and for the first time in his adult life, Derek lost all of his nerve.

“You could kiss it better,” he suggested. “Because you are much hotter than any of the EMTs at the scene.” Derek grimaced internally, knowing that he came off sounding like an asshole. All he had to do was ask you on a date. It should have been easy. So why couldn’t he?

You closed your eyes and sighed exasperatedly, pulling away. “Wow, fumbled at the five yard line,” you teased, trying to hide your disappointment. You had thought that Derek and you were really having a moment, but maybe he really just didn’t want strings attached.

Derek frowned slightly, but tried to laugh it off. It was the first time that he thought he actually had a chance with you, and he blew it. “Yeah, I guess I did, huh?”

You fought a smile as you stood up out of your chair. “Mhm. But there’s always tomorrow. And since you’ve had such a rough past few days…”

You spun Derek’s chair around so that he was facing you, and you placed your hands on the arms of his chair, leaning over him. The two of you kept eye contact for what felt like ten years, and his cologne was making you dizzy. Slowly, you pressed a lingering kiss right on the corner of his lips. Derek’s breath got caught in his throat as you pulled yourself away, albeit on shaky legs.

“And that’s all the lovin’ you’re getting from me tonight,” you teased.

Derek leaned back in his chair, his hand over his heart in what looked to be a dramatic display of affection. In truth, he was trying to calm his rapid heartbeat however he could. “Oh, light of my life,” he cooed. “That’s more than enough. It’s the only win I’ve gotten all week.”

~~~~~~~

It had been a few days since your night in the office with Derek, and he hadn’t tried anything, which worried you. He wasn’t avoiding you, and the two of you still exchanged pleasantries throughout the day, but he wasn’t flirting with you anymore.

Part of you wondered if you were too harsh with him that night, if you should have just kissed him and gone home with him. But within the past few weeks, your infatuation with Derek Morgan had turned into a full blown crush, as juvenile as it sounded, and you did not want to be another notch in his bedpost. So you were willing to wait it out, to see if you would actually say the words: “Do you want to go out with me?”.

As if you had summoned him, Derek Morgan wheeled his chair over to your desk and put down a coffee cup from your favorite little cafe in front of you.

“Iced vanilla latte with oat milk?”

“You know both of my coffee orders?” you grinned. “I’m impressed.”

“Consider it a bribe,” Derek said, and you raised your eyebrow as a response.

“A bribe?”

“Please go out with me,” Derek asked, trying not to sound as desperate as he felt. “Pretty please. This was fun for a while, but now you are the only thing I think about. I can’t do my job, and I can barely sleep. I feel like I’m going crazy. You are so hot and so smart and so funny. Please let me take you on a date.”

The smile that grew on your face was so big that your cheeks started to hurt. “I’d love that.”

Derek seemed shocked that his attempt actually worked, and he blinked a few times just to make sure he heard you correctly. “Seriously? It’s a yes?”

“Mhm,” you nodded, taking a sip of the coffee Derek got you. “You finally asked me. Of course I said yes.”

“All I’ve been doing the past few weeks has been asking you,” he pointed out.

You hummed to yourself as you scrunched up your nose. “No. You told me that we were going on a date, asked me to have sex with you twice, and the rest of the times, you just used pick up lines. This is the first time you ever actually asked.”

Derek stared at your wordlessly, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to figure out what to say. Finally, he landed on: “That’s all it took?”

“Yup,” you replied, popping the ‘p’. “Although, I do want to hear more about my eyes and the meteor shower.”

Derek let out a breathy chuckle, shaking his head as he did. “I will be sure to tell you all about it. And more. I’ll pick you up at 8?”

You were practically beaming as you watched Derek stand back up. “That sounds perfect. Oh, and Derek? I hope you still have those candles out and ready to use.”

“Baby, I never put them away.” Derek winked at you before walking back to his desk. Prentiss was mumbling something about owing Hotch money, but Derek was so high up on cloud 9 that he couldn’t be bothered to care.

“See Reid,” Derek said as he took his seat at his desk. “That’s what we call ‘playing the long game’.”

“Finally,” Spencer grumbled, his nose buried in some book Derek didn’t recognize. “Took you long enough to realize.”

Derek’s eyebrows furrowed together. “You knew?”

Spencer scoffed, flipping the page of the book he was reading. “I knew from the first time they rejected you.”

Derek leaned forward, placing his elbows on his desk. “Man, why didn’t you tell me?”

Spencer finally looked up from his book, his eyebrow quirked up. “You were ‘playing the long game’,” he quoted in a bad impression of Derek’s voice. “And since I’m running it, I get a cut of the entire betting pool, no matter who won, so it was in my best interest to keep it going as long as possible.”

Derek shook his head in disbelief. “I see. That pretty face of yours is hiding an evil genius.”

Spencer hummed in agreement and went back to his book. There was a beat of silence before he spoke again. “They want you to take them to that Mediterranean place two blocks down.”

“Okay, there is no way you know that,” Derek groaned, rolling his eyes.

“You don’t have to take my advice, but you should. Clearly, you’re helpless,” Spencer shrugged, and Derek laughed as he threw a crumpled piece of paper at him.

When Derek picked you up that night, he made sure that the flowers he brought you were hypoallergenic, and the Mediterranean place ended up being the right choice, not that he would ever admit that to Spencer.

And he did, for the record, make sure to set out those candles he promised, but at the end of the night, the two of you were too busy tearing off each other’s clothes to even bother lighting them.

[yourstreetserenade]

😅🎶🍷🤗

What's a scene or story you've created that you're a smidge embarrassed exists?

To be honest, I'm not really embarrassed about anything I've written. My fics are stupid, no doubt, but like, purposely so. I like to think I have a certain brand and that brand is ridiculous and I embrace it. I really love when an idea comes to me and my immediate reaction is ''that's stupid....how can I turn this into an engaging story?'' To date one of my most memorable reviews was simply ''I found this and expected crack nonsense but this is a masterpiece.''

There are certain things I can look back at now and think I could have definitely written better but I'm not embarrassed by those bits because writing them then is what helped me progress and I can't knock that.

Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

Okay don't laugh but lately it's been this Aly and AJ song while continuing to plot out a celebrity AU I've been working on for like two years.

Do I drink and write?

No, I don't drink, so.

What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

Just to write where your heart takes you and where the characters take you. Sometimes it won't be what you planned and that's okay. Sometimes I'd work out some really elaborate way to get from Point A to Point B but in building the story, the characters led me down a different path entirely. It doesn't mean my planning or my final destination was bad, maybe those little bits and pieces were just meant for another story.

Another thing. You can not please everyone. There will always be people upset or angry because you don't cater to their specific tastes. You can't let those opinions factor into how you craft your story. Easier said than done I know but.

[juergenklopp]

16 and 5 for the spotify asks! hehehe :catblush:

5. Run Away with Me by Carly Rae Jepsen

Baby, take me to the feeling I'll be your sinner in secret When the lights go out Run away with me, run away with me Baby, every single minute I'll be your hero and win it When the lights go out Run away with me, run away with me

I could write a 5000-word essay about this song, but I’ll refrain. This video sums it all up, I agree with every word, I ghostwrote it, et cetera. Greatest pop song ever, bar none. Do not @ me.

16. Potential Breakup Song (Explicit Version) by Aly & AJ

It took too long, it took too long, it took too long For you to call back And normally, I would just forget that Except for the fact it was my birthday My fucking birthday

The absolute delight I felt when I first listened to this version of the song. Fuck yeah, let them say fuck. Still one of the most iconic tracks of the noughties.

(I love that these songs together could be a plot to a story—whirlwind romance, falling hard and fast, implosion?)

Spotify Wrapped 1-101