#listen I know I can do things to not have the condition
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inkieflame · 2 days ago
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do martyn and ren have any sort of relationship in your au (platonic or otherwise)? what are they most often rented out for?
Trigger warning: drugs and other mind-altering conditions
That's not a simple question (it never is with those two, is it?)
I was gonna save some of the Ren lore for later, but y'all can have a teaser now I guess. Just for you, anon ^^
(edit: it was not just a teaser. I wrote a lot. Oops.)
Yes, there is something happening between Ren and Martyn. They really want to be together (platonic? Romantic? Who knows) they want it more than anything, but it's difficult. Aside from their obvious lack of communication skills, Martyn just... isn't in the lab very often. He's one of the more popular subjects for renting. And then, of course, Ren has his own problems.
Martyn was one of the very first subjects. He remembers when Grian would laugh. He remembers when Taurtis and Netty were still around (no one knows exactly where all those subjects went...) It took him a while to get over Netty leaving, they had been married before they were both captured and brought to the lab, so grieving her was difficult for Martyn.
But then, one day, there is a new batch of subjects, Ren among them. He was so... Outgoing. So starry-eyed. So certain that this facility couldn't keep them down. They would escape! They had to!
And Martyn had missed this kind of light in his life. It has been so sad. Grian had been silent for months, no laughter to be heard. Jimmy was always limping and injured.
Ren was so bright, so warm, he was the sun. And Martyn had such an adoration for the sun.
But Ren doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut. His talk of escape made him a threat, and the Watchers hadn't decided how they would torment him yet. But now they felt pressured to decide fast.
First Ren was drugged. Drugged until his brain was mushy and malleable. And then the Watchers decided it would be amusing to make their new dog hybrid believe he was a real dog. Make him bark, teach him tricks, have him eat from a bowl.
Maybe someone would find their new puppy entertaining enough to rent, but if not, Ren would still be useful. Ren would be an example. This is what happens to subjects who try to escape. Your thoughts melt, you are reduced to a play-thing, an animal.
No one has spoken of escape in a long time.
Not where the Watchers can hear at least.
Ren gets his own play space, his own food, and a room away from the others. Puppies don't sleep in human beds, and they certainly don't eat human food. But the other subjects can visit him.
Martyn is there. Martyn is always there. He tries to break the conditioning, he tries again and again to get Ren to answer him. But Ren's only response is to beg for pets.
Martyn despairs.
But the world keeps going, and Martyn still has to work. He gets rented often, and it's an easy distraction for him. Don't think about Ren. Don't think about the sun. You know your despair only fuels those Watchers.
Martyn is rented for many things, but mostly parties. He's a skilled bartender, multitalented in tricks and shows. He's one of the few subjects who is allowed multiple outfits, most of them too skimpy for his taste. Sometimes he's rented as a waiter, a dancer, or an escort. Once he was rented for a children's birthday party.
Sometimes he is rented by a masked man who calls himself a Listener. He makes Martyn promise not to tell the Watchers about who he is, and then tells Martyn various bits of information. Sometimes it's the lab layout (to help in an escape attempt) or sometimes they give him medicine to reverse the effects of the drugs some of the other subjects are on. Depends on the day. The Listener doesn't rent often.
And Ren has a few renters too, but much less frequent than Martyn. People are curious. Most of Ren's renters currently are repeat renters, who want to see him again. It's not a bad life for him. Simple, comfortable, lots of attention.
It's not like he can think straight enough to be bothered by it anyway.
He can only think well enough to remember Martyn, the one who always visits him and pets him. He misses Martyn's often.
So... Yes. There is something between them. It's complicated.
I'll probably expand on this more later...
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racketballz · 1 day ago
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Hi I was curious on whether or not you think the rowdy ruff boys love each other?
I know you said it was a codependent relationship between them before. I also think about the way they interact in sbj. Then I thought about the way they interacted with one another in the multiverse game where it has the dialogue of them saying that they like having each other as brothers.
I can remember correctly in sbj more than human brick got upset with buttercup over a statement about butches condition in citiesvill. Sorry if I misspell that part. That got me thinking
.Somewhere in his ego twisted heart his prideful heart and world hating heart
.he has some form of love for his brothers. Kinda in a way like the girls do.
I know butch in some posts you have said does not care about himself cause that’s just how he is. I remember in sbj he is usually bricks
.kinda right hand man in a way:
not sure what to exactly call it but if he listens to anyone ever it’s either brick or buttercup.
Or would you say it’s a relationship based off trauma and fear more and that there isn’t a lot of love if not any at all.
I’ve seen other instagram things where people have said brick would do anything for his brothers.
I find it cute and like to see some form of positive care in sbj more than human when brick shows concern in the brotherly way. Makes me almost forget about all his đŸš©.
Also side not anytime you post about brick I get very interested and intrigued cause I’m so confused by him. Love to see he has to deal with the fact that just like humans he too feels embarrassed or feelings for blossom. Or has bad days. When his car got totaled I laughed cause he did deserve it.
So yea
.that’s my Ted talk
.
I like this question so I will answer it even tho I don’t have the time to like be long winded like I’d like to LMAO
but yes the boys love eachother
No they don’t know how to express themselves and don’t see an issue with it
Uhh yes butch is loyal to brick and buttercup he is in a tight spot RIP butch
yes they’re learning as they go it doesn’t help they also are attracted to the person they’re supposed to kill
I find they show their love in the ways they know eachother so well brick always knows where is brothers are butch talks about his brothers a lot when they’re not in the room same with boomer and boomer often will look to brick for guidance (butch too but I think he often will disobey him to get some rise out of him because he knows that about him as well)
Brick is confusing I think that’s the best part about him he’s built up thick skin but it’s not thick enough so everything hurts him poor guy
I also think the boys are inherently tragic characters when you think of them as anything other than killing machines because they’re bred from a place of hatred
I do not feel bad for them tho do not get it mixed up being angry unhinged and pathetic is hot
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howlingday · 2 days ago
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Loan Sharks
Roman: (Walks into Dust shop) Well, well... Nice place you got here.
Old Man Shopkeep: Oh, why, thank you... This store has been in my family for-
Roman: It'd be a real shame if somethin' were to happen to it. If you KNOW WHAT I MEAN~.
Roman: (Punches glass, Winces) Rrrgh! S... See what I mean?
Old Man Shopkeep: Oh, goodness! Your hand!
Roman: Listen here; you're gonna have to start paying me insurance money, y'hear? Or else... (Punches palm, Stabbing self) Ow... Ow... Ow!
Old Man Shopkeep: What are you gonna do?
Roman: (Knocks over display, Shatters foot) OOOGH! (Clutching, Whimpering) Ah... Sonuva... (Glances, Scowl) Well... We wouldn't want any accidents, would we?
Roman: (Hobbles to desk, Leans and slips, Random glass displays shatter on him) C-Cause I can make things... REAL MESSY FOR YAS... (Crystal shatters on face, Whimpers) If yas know what I mean...
Old Man Shopkeep: Sir, you're in no condition to threaten me! You need help!
Roman: (Stands up) Oh, a tough guy, huh? Well, we know what to do to tough guys around here! (Charges, Punches)
Old Man Shopkeep: ...
Roman: (Hits glass reflection of shopkeep, Crushed by mirror display)
Old Man Shopkeep: (Pushes mirror off) Sir, you're terribly hurt! I'm calling you help!
Roman: No... Don't do that! (Run over)
Jaune: (Hops out of ambulance) Well, well, well... What do we have here?
Nora: Someone ain't feelin' too well, well, well?
Jaune: Mm, looks like you got a clean bill of health right there. It's be a shame if somethin' were to... happen to it~.
Nora: Hah! You're gonna have to start payin' us insurance money, y'hear?!
Roman: No... Please...!
Jaune: (Evil laughter as he readies gurney)
Nora: (Cackles as she grabs her syringe)
--------------------------------------------------
Roman: (Sipping juice in the hospital bed)
Lil' Miss: Look at how they mended my boy...
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artsekey · 7 months ago
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It really does look like pivoting to Harris has thrown the Republican party for a loop. She's speaking clearly, concisely, and with wit; if she were to be put in the ring with Trump, it would be a knockout if only because she's coherent.
I'm voting blue regardless, but I've started to feel like I've moved from voting for the 'least bad' option to someone I might actually be more passionate in supporting.
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contagious-watermelon · 3 months ago
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It's interesting to me that understandings of transsexuality have been almost exclusively filtered through the lens of queerness and the social aspects of gender. In other words, that the "T" was added to "LGBT." I've thought for a while that in a lot of cases, transness — and specifically dysphoria — makes a lot more sense when analyzed through the lens of disability rather than through queerness. (Personally I see it as being at the intersection between those things.)
I think that a theory of transsexuality would be incomplete without taking into account the societal aspects of gender, yes, but it seems to be similarly incomplete in the popular understanding of it.
I've seen a lot of discussion in the stuff I've read by disabled people about the contention between being objectively harmed or, well, disabled, by your disability, but still wanting to be proud of it or finding identity in it regardless. A lot of autistic communities, I've noticed, talk a lot about the fact that being autistic is difficult; it's made worse by other people's reactions to it, but it still is hard on its own (e.g. auditory overstimulation); yet people still can say that they'd rather be autistic than not. Or they may say they wish they weren't, but that they've come to terms with it because it's not exactly changeable.
Point is, there's open discussion about the differences between inherent challenges to your disability regardless of society, the ways which ableism makes things more difficult, and the contention of finding identity and community in your disability despite that. (And I use autism as an example because I'm autistic; I don't want to speak for, say, a physically disabled community as I'm able-bodied. But I have seen similar discussions there as well.)
The trans community, as I've seen, doesn't really have that. We're polarized between the extremely self-hating people who think that being trans is a curse and that people who like being trans are just fakers co-opting transness, and the toxically positive contingent who refuse to engage with the fact that sometimes dysphoria really does just hurt. And also that transphobia exists.
There's also the fact that in many ways, dysphoria is actually disabling. It isn't for everyone, and part of the problem is that transness as a concept covers so many things that analyzing it through just one lens will always be incomplete, but for me at least it caused me a lot of depression and dissociation, and made it difficult-to-impossible to interact with other people or function at my classes. Back before I medically transitioned, I related a lot to some descriptions by disabled people about their chronic pain, because my dysphoria effectively was chronic psychological pain. I don't want to say it's the same thing, because obviously I've only experienced one of those things, and dysphoria has a treatment while many (all?) chronic illnesses don't, but nevertheless it was a comforting lens to think of my dysphoria through in the time before I got top surgery.
Also of note is the way both our communities are treated by the medical establishment. I've heard many horror stories by disabled people of how doctors simply refuse to diagnose them or give them issues with their meds. Trans people obviously also have to deal with the shit that doctors put out in order to get access to HRT and any necessary surgeries. People deride HRT, saying that we shouldn't take it because it'll "make you a medical patient for life." People act like mental pain isn't real — calling depression fake, acting like because things like fibromyalgia aren't "real pain" that it shouldn't bother you so much, etc. — and that extends too into the way they dismiss the pain of gender dysphoria.
So, I don't really understand why the trans community has taken so many pains to disavow themselves from being considered even remotely similar to disabled people. I know that the common refrain, "we're not mentally ill!" is meant to combat the idea that we're deluded into thinking that we're a "different gender" than we really are, but the effect is throwing actually mentally ill trans people under the bus. The insistence that there's no way that dysphoria should be considered a disorder because there's nothing wrong with us — I just think that we could take a hint or two from the way that disabled people theorize about this subject.
#trans#transgender#transsexual#o.#trans theory#disability#this post is kind of all over the place bc I have a lot of thoughts on the subject and I haven't really organized them yet#so sorry for the rant#hopefully someone who knows more about sociology and/or disability theory than I do can say whether any of this makes sense lol#I am very much not a sociologist or even close to being one#also theres a whole bunch of other ways I think the trans community could benefit from listening to disabled people that I didnt say bc thi#post is long enough#(understanding ''disabled'' as an umbrella term which covers a wide range of disparate experiences)#(high-support needs vs low-support needs and understanding that some people need more stuff (analogous to more extreme dysphoria) but that#both are affected by their disability even if they might need different things)#(people have competing access needs sometimes & that doesnt mean that either person is wrong but just that every space can't cater to every#body)#just in general I think disability theory & even just general discussions in the disabled community seems a lot more robust and in depth#than the stuff I see about trans people#I really do tend to view my transness as more of a medical condition than a social identifier so maybe that influences my thoughts on the#matter#it seems the only other people who think that way are transmedicalists and I'm not touching them with a ten foot pole. their anti-nonbinary#hatred alone makes it impossible to even consider doing so
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phagodyke · 3 months ago
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kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
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hexslvt · 3 months ago
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anyways my mom tried to justify screaming at me today with the fact that i'm "not grateful enough for everything she does" and it brought me right back to being with my ex so đŸ‘đŸ»
#i guess i know where i learned to tolerate it from !#she screamed at me because i put broken down boxes in the trash and she was having a hard time getting the trash bag out of the trash#and after i went and did it (easily.) i told her that i don't think i should be being yelled at and spoken to so disrespectfully#and she immediately turned it around on me#listing everything im doing wrong and how i'm not grateful so.#she literally told me to go back into my room three times.#it's so draining having to relive it nd feel the same way#i don't understand why i'm not worth listen to or validating#i don't know why the people who love me just trample on my fucking feelings when i express them#she literally completely ignored me. JUSTIFIED yelling at me and being disrespectful#and then pointed out things im doing that she doesn't like#she had ME apologizing#why the fuck cant i catch a break please fuck#i just#why can i not be worth enough to people for unconditional love#both of my parents love and respect is conditional and it's so painful#i just. genuinely why can't people who love me just. treat me with respect#i looked at her dead in the face and was like you have a choice how you speak to me and it's not fair that when you're frustrated you#scream and insult me#but any time IM frustrated and have even the slightest tone she will hoot and holler and make me out to be the most disrespectful person#and then so she had ME apologizing and then literally said she's always apologized and ive never apologized to anyone in my life#like what the fuck is genuinely wrong with her#jester.txt
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britneyshakespeare · 4 months ago
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I feel like certain people on Tumblr have really been fighting for backwards progress when it comes to how we talk about mental illness and abuse. I see posts at least several times a week on my dash that seem to have the purpose of implying people with insert-mental-illness and/or insert-symptom are not abusive when they do insert-action-that-makes-people-uncomfortable, often times meaning to promote a more positive image of people with particularly stigmatized conditions, like personality disorders, mood disorders, psychosis, addiction, or neurodivergence. And I really really hate it because these posts almost always have the ultimate purpose of telling people not just "This thing is not inherently abusive," but often it comes across as "You were not abused."
I just find that to be really unhelpful and unintentionally hurtful, and for what? I believe that destigmatizing various mental conditions is a worthy cause, but at the same time this type of rhetoric seems to be so protective of people in whichever stigmatized group they're trying to advocate for, that it comes back around to a sort of respectability politics. Anybody can be an abuser. And someone's means and methods of abusing can very much be influenced by a condition they have. Why wouldn't it be? Their conditions will affect every aspect of their life and their interpersonal relationships. Especially if these issues are going untreated or being insufficiently managed. I don't understand why anyone would want to make it appear as if abusers are mostly neurotypical and mentally well people, or that if they aren't, then their conditions have nothing to do with it and the overlap is merely incidental. What? It makes it so hard for anyone who is a victim to come to terms and identify the dynamics of what they've gone through.
Addicts and mentally ill people don't have to be unproblematic in order to be humanized and accepted. And nobody profits from writing hard and fast rules about how abuse apparently works, drawing clear lines between which behaviors can, and cannot, ever be abuse.
#tales from diana#making unrebloggable bc i can't handle the discourse on this topic#my own experience with being abused and taken advantage of by someone who almost CERTAINLY had npd... just kinda breaks me#when i see this and it's like making it out to be 'everyone who says they suffered from narcissistic abuse is lying#or misunderstanding what narcissism is because ppl w npd would NEVER do this'#i can see that it's a highly stigmatized term and i don't want to act like an expert on what ppl w the condition go through#but i can tell you i felt deep sympathy for this man for a long time. i felt pity for all he'd gone through. but he'd just lay on the guilt#for every little thing i did that ever displeased him for any reason. he just degraded and disrespected me. and USED me#he used me for money for attention for CONSTANT attention oh my god#he wouldn't even let me go to sleep sometimes before 3 am. and he stole so much money from me#he put me in physical danger. he gossiped about me to all my friends when i was starting to distance myself#before i even came to terms with just how toxic he was to me.#and every time i just wanted to go somewhere wo him or even just stay at home by myself#it was about HIM. it was about how HE felt about it. he had ZERO sympathy for me and i handled all his emotional labor#this man couldn't even think for himself. he brought all his problems to me for me to sort through bc he was so inept and shallow#he was lazy he was careless he didn't listen to ppl he was casually rude#i didn't allow myself to accept these parts of him bc of all he suffered through i felt like he was just a sad little boy#who never learned manners or etiquette or. just. respect#basic respect. as much as i outlined what i wasn't ok w and what hurt me. it didn't matter to him#and NONE of these things are inherently the things that make me think he has npd#his actual suffering and the things i felt bad for him about were very real and severe#but i know what happened between us and i know he was abusive to me. the ppl writing these posts do not.#to say that someone has been abusive in an interpersonal relationship should be something we should be able to respect#and give ppl the benefit of the doubt. and victims may OFTEN not be well-informed about their own abusers' issues#but ppl can just know whether or not they were abused. regardless of if they fully grasp the why and how#if victims say something problematic or paint w a broad brush talking abt ppl who have something in common w their abuser#we should still correct that gently and kindly and not dismiss their experience outright#like i can't believe i have to say that. but i've seen some seriously upsetting posts on here recently.
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beammetothemoon · 1 year ago
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Me @ me when I see the bloodless condition on a check:
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dandelionjack · 2 years ago
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i don’t want to kill myself but looking at the future sometimes i feel like i have no other option. i fucked it up too far without anticipating consequences and it’s too late to make a change or strive towards any kind of hopeful meaningful existence. there is no way out for someone like me who has nothing going for them, squandered any opportunity, any talent, everything that was handed to them on a silver platter. no interesting personality traits, no aptitudes, nothing to make up for the gaping void where motivation and will to live and thrive and put in effort towards a goal should be. even the most basic steps are a pipe dream. i don’t want to die because i fear the possibility of hell but i no longer see any tolerable way of living.
#i reread parts of mark fisher’s capitalist realism last night and i know it’s unhealthy for theory to cement your own depressive spiral but#i’m thinking of him. even an accomplished thinker and it’s all the fucking same#i’m goinh to listen to swans and cry. i skipped class again and for fucking what#notice how it’s all i i i i i. i have no community no support network no close friends no partner nothing#only my parents who are affluent enough to support me financially but that support is conditional because if#they knew about what i was really like and even parts of my identity that support would be cut off and because i#have no marketable skills i would be left penniless to beg on the street#how long can i keep pretending to be cis and depending on them for vital necessities? until i’m 22? 25?#dropping out isn’t even an option because a bachelors’ degree is prerequisite to getting ANY job that pays above minimum wage but i#feel no passion for the subject i’m studying despite it being literally one of the only things i used to be GREAT at (media analysis; so —#lit major; on foundations for liberal arts; which should be all about PASSION FOR THE SUBJECT)#i’m teetering on the precipice of a steep cliff that drops down into the abyss of abject poverty with no way out#i don’t know what i enjoy doing; what to dedicate my resources and energy to; if i have none left. i don’t even smoke or drink or do drugs#it’s just sober suffering in silence. of course the meds don’t fucking help; meds can’t alter the world around us or our circumstances#this fucking close to going out and buying a rope. i have free will :)) hell can’t be real; it can’t be. worst that could#happen is reincarnation and honestly i could go for a second chance#jamie.txt#tw suicidal ideation
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yuribalisms · 1 year ago
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So I answer this phone call, and the lady is like “I’m getting the documentation to approve this” and I’m like oh thank GOD but then she says “I have to order you specific ear plugs that the company approves of :)” and I’m like “wait ear plugs as in to cancel all noise” and she’s like “yes :)” and I’m like “no this was about ear buds or headphones, things being completely silent is just as bad if not worse for my sensory issues” and she gets real quiet and is like “I’m a going to have to talk to your doctor about this then for some more clarification” and I’m like HFDJSIDKJDKDJDK that is what the letter SAIDD it specified ear buds so I can play things that I know help regulate my sensory issues and it also said in the letter to contact my therapist if anyone had more questions why are we even having this conversation are you fucking stupid it’s already been a MONTH since I turned all this in and now I have to wait even fucking longer because no one can read and wants to be as difficult as possible
#also the entire call she kept saying shit like ‘it’s very normal for ppl with your conditions to have sensory issues it’s nothing#to be ashamed of đŸ„ș’#like girl
. I never said I was ashamed why are you saying that
..#also hate hate hate that she specified they had to be ‘specially ordered and company approved ear plugs sent directly to the warehouse’#if they end up clearing this but do the same thing with ear buds I’m gonna lose my shit#just let me use MINE that connect to MY PHONE that I already HAVE that I like the adjustments on I’m BEGGING 😭😭😭#also she kept specifying that I could use a ‘calming app’ or ‘calming noise’ maybe once I said ear buds#if they try and tell me I can only use ‘company approve software’ for this I’m going to LOSE my shit#like no if you try and make me listen to the fucking ocean or like smooth instrumental shit for eight hours I will snap and go insane#I regulate with screamo and metal and edm THATS what helps with my sensory issues#overly ‘calm’ things tend to make them WORSE#I’m just so tired
.. like idk could we maybe just trust that disabled ppl know what they need for themselves more than randos who had like#two conversations with them and then decided this was ‘better’#I’m so fucking tired#she also exclusively referred to me with my deadname the entire call#despite all my emails AND THE FUCKING LETTER FROM MY THERAPIST using my chosen name#like girl
. 😭😭😭😭😭#I hate it here I hate this company I hate it so much its unreal#kaz rambles
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thepoetrytheorist · 7 months ago
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If you love Disney, its parks, its media, and its merch, listen up.
So I work for Disneyland, and we are talking about striking very soon. So soon, in fact, that we've been hosting rallies just outside of the parks. Yesterday was the 69th birthday of Disneyland Anaheim... it was also a monumental rally.
I haven't seen anyone on tumblr talking about the impending strikes against Disney. Not even going through the Disney tags or searching tumblr for "Disneyland Strike."
Let's talk about why we're striking:
Cost of living in the immediate SoCal region is nearly 2x as much as we are getting paid.
Cast members that have worked for the company for long periods of time are still paid as mucha s new hires.
Disney has showed up to union negotiations with insulting offers, including at 25 cent raise. Most cast members make $19.90
Disney rarely schedules you. In some areas and departments, you are fighting with your fellow cast members for hours. I have heard of cast members who are only scheduled for 1 4-hour shift per week. Many of those cast members have upwards of an hour commute to and from work.
Disney Admin has told attractions castmembers [so: rides, rollercoasters, and anything fun you get to do and see at the parks] that we are losing them money, which is why they refuse to schedule us and pay us. In the words of my partner, who also works at the parks, Disney without attractions is an over glorified mall and a food court. Disney needs us, and they know it, but they do not respect us.
Disney has an unfair attendance policy. It can be very difficult to get a needed day off, even when it has been requested weeks or months in advance. When you do take a day off [with-out accrued sick or vacation time] it counts against you. You can have 3 a month, 6 in 90 days, 9 in 180 days, or 12 in a year. How do you accrue sick/vacation? Hours worked, which can be impossible with the scheduling practices mentioned above. (Most cast members trade shifts among themselves to get around this.)
Cast members feel unsafe and unsupported in the parks. Many cast members have felt threatened by entitled guests upset that they are following policy. Disney Leads and Managers have to say yes to these guests and make things happen, though. [Which only makes this behavior worse and more dangerous for cast members who are only doing their job.]
Cast members also report feeling threatened, or even being literally threatened, by management in the parks. Especially cast members who have a second job. Especially cast members who know their rights.
Further, cast members work in hazardous conditions with pay that does not reflect that. Many cast members report losses of hearing, sore throats, and severe back and shoulder pain. Cast members are also exposed to infectious diseases at a much higher rate.
https://www.sfgate.com/disneyland/article/union-button-contract-dispute-19515296.php?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR2u5o_mvU3i6jpIyHxBUZpEzD2GRSKFf5Pem4uRXqa6vKWDgZuffvINd1g_aem_AA1L0fI1phugJIluYMcDSw
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agayconcept · 2 months ago
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#sigh#another day another medical gaslighting incident#-.-#i s2g i cant remember the last time i had a consult that wasnt just some dickhead ignoring every symptom / word i said#and then blaming all my chronic illnesses & disabilities on sleep / anxiety / weight / being trans etc#dude wouldnt listen to anything other than the sound of his own voice#and Insisted on putting me on a medication i am not remotely comfortable going on bc of oast bad reactions to similar ones#literally was like 'well u can do what i say or u can just figure ur life out and stop being stressed and sedentary all the time'#BUDDY#a) im disabled. being sedentary is not a choice and becoming un-sedentary is not an option#b) my chronic migraines and fibromyalgia r not because of stress. yes stress can make them worse sometimes#but anxiety does not cause or create severe physical conditions and disabilites. ur ridiculous. this is ridiculous#c) 'fixing my life' will not fix my chronically ill and disabled body. what a wild thing to say who tf gave u ur license#and why do u have a job at a pain clinic that specialises in chronic illnesses and disabilities. tf#d) its wildly irresponsible to insist on a medication that's from a family of meds known to cause bad side effects / reactions in a patient#and then ignore them when they tell u they r not comfortable going on that medication bc of that#and then to refuse to discuss alternatives and demand a 'my way or the highway' approach to care#and end in telling the patient they do not care about their health if they don't blindly do as u say when u dont even know them#fuck u dude#i care more about my health than u do. u have known me for 3 minutes and 20 seconds and barely skimmed my file. fuck Right off#and lastly#e) ur a dismissive discriminatory asshole and there's not a chance in hell i will trust a word out of ur mouth#when all u did in that 5 minute appt (THAT U WERE 73 MINUTES LATE TO) was gaslight tf out of me and blame me for all my disabilities#get fucked bro#ur as much of a shithead as every other doctor i've dealt with at that clinic#like the one who put me on said bad medication which caused me to lose half my hair#and then ghosted me as soon as i called to inform her of that and request a med change. its been 8 months & she still refuses to contact me#i've left over 10 messages. i ended up having to go to my GP and a dermatologist who both said to get off that medication asap#which i did. but the telogen effluvium (hair loss due to meds) STILL hasnt bounced back so now im close to balding bc of that shit doctor#and now u want me to go on a med known to cause that even WORSE just bc u feel like it regardless of my well-being? Nah. no. fuck that 🖕👋
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girl-bateman · 7 months ago
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Blood-work came back fine which either means I really do have a mysterious deadly illness OR its my mental health that's fucking up my physical health. Now my dilemma for my upcoming appointment .. do I mention how neurotically devastated I've been feeling these last months, knowing the doctor might be relieved to blame it all on hysteria instead of doing more testing ? Or do I just... not say anything about that.. lol
#i feel very very uncomfortable referring to diagnoses or specific mental health conditions that i cannot confirm i have (!)#but if this is indeed all linked to that stuff that happened 4months ago#which hypothetically would be linked to some unpleasantness that idk about from the past#then yes. my physical symptoms could technically be explained by a triggered trauma response#made worse by anxiety stress hightened cortisol levels etc etc#HOWEVER lots of doctors tend to dismiss women abt physical symptoms in favour of blaming mental health issues#and i dont want to give them any reason to do that in case i really am sick fr (as in dying lol)#bit then again i kinda am hysterical 👍#im relieved my friends have been so gentle with me abt this but it kinda makes it harder to have a reference point for how insane/normal#my thoughts and reflections are. bc they're just doing that empathetic listening thing. not rly saying what THEY think u know#and dont get me wrong! thats prob the right call! but for once id just like for someone to be like#'obviously u were xx' ??? bc they just keep saying they dont wanna speculate. and i dont either! but im going mad trying to find anwsers#and ig i just want someone to tell me what i should think and do and whats normal and whats not#like??? is it rational for me to think something bad happened or am i being delusional. evil and paranoid ???#am i in denial for believing that nothing might have happened at all and that there might be other things to explain whats going on ??#i just want to know what the normal ppl think bc i feel very far from normal rn#and i can tell my friends are having so many opinions that they are leaving unsaid#which low key is not helping the paranoia BUT once again i know that they are doing it out of kindness and sensitivity 🙏💓#i love my friends and this is not a diss to them !!! i just have a lot of conflicting thoughts and feelings abt it looool#sorry these tags always turn into a rant#diary entries
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shiftthemoon · 1 month ago
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reality shifting isn’t hard. you’ve been told it’s hard because everyone’s too scared to admit it’s not. they cling to their 800-step methods, their must-have crystals, their perfect conditions because they think that if they let go of that control, they’ll fail. but here’s the thing: the more you try to control the process, the more you convince yourself it’s out of your control. and that’s the problem. that’s why so many people feel stuck. shifting isn’t some big, far-fetched thing. it’s just you. it’s always been you.
we’re conditioned to think we’re powerless. think about it—school, work, society, all of it drills this idea into us that everything has to be proven, earned, validated. so, when you hear about shifting, your brain freaks out and says, wait, wait, this is too easy, this can’t be real. and then you spiral. you overcomplicate it. you make yourself think you need the “perfect” script, the “right” subliminal, or that you have to meditate for three hours while the stars align perfectly. like, no
 you don’t. all of that? it’s fluff. it’s noise.
at its core, shifting is belief. just belief. no, really, let that sink in. you don’t need to “do” belief perfectly. it’s not something you master through sheer willpower. it’s something you already have. you’ve believed in things your whole life. you believed in gravity without needing proof. you believe your favorite songs are beautiful without needing to explain why. belief is natural. it’s effortless when you stop overthinking it. that’s the energy you need to bring to shifting—trust. trust that your mind knows what it’s doing, and that if you let it, it will take you there. every single extra thing you pile on? the overthinking, the doubt, the need for guarantees? that’s what’s slowing you down. not the “lack of progress,” not some mythical “block”—it’s you convincing yourself it’s harder than it is.
and let’s talk about social media for a second. oh my god, the shifting community on social media
 i get it. it’s comforting to see other people on this journey. but let’s be honest—how much of that content is actually helping you? like, really? 90% of the time, scrolling through shifting advice isn’t inspiring; it’s overwhelming. everyone’s got their own opinions, their own “best methods,” their own rules. one person says scripting is a must, another says it’s a waste of time. one person swears by affirmations, another says visualization is the only way. and before you know it, you’re sitting there questioning everything you thought you knew, wondering if you’ll ever get it “right.” spoiler alert: you already know how to shift. you don’t need a thousand voices telling you what to do. in fact, the more you listen to them, the harder it becomes to hear yourself.
take a break. seriously. log off the apps. give yourself space to breathe and think. ask yourself: why do i want to shift? what’s stopping me? what feels right to me? no tiktok trend, youtube guide, or reddit post can answer those questions for you. only you can. and i know that sounds scary. we’ve been conditioned to think we need external validation for everything, but shifting is a deeply personal thing. you don’t need a step-by-step tutorial. you need to trust your instincts. that’s it.
and let me be clear: i’m not saying methods or subliminals are bad. they’re fine if they help you feel aligned. but they’re not what makes shifting happen. you are. methods are just tools. if you use them, great. if you don’t, that’s great too. because the truth is, shifting isn’t about doing things “right.” it’s about letting go of the idea that you need to.
so let me break it down for you. the only things you really need to shift are:
1. a desire. you have to want to go to your desired reality. no brainer, right?
2. belief. this is the big one. you have to trust it’s possible. no “what ifs,” no “but hows.” just trust.
3. persistence. if it doesn’t happen right away, that’s okay. don’t give up. if you’ve ever learned to ride a bike, you know that falling doesn’t mean you can’t do it—it just means you’re learning. shifting is the same.
that’s it. no fancy rituals, no endless research, no “perfect” conditions. the process is simple because it’s natural. you’ve probably done it before without even realizing it— the only reason it feels hard now is because you’ve convinced yourself it has to be.
stop making it harder than it needs to be. shifting isn’t this unattainable, mystical thing reserved for “chosen ones.” it’s something anyone can do. you can do it. your mom can do it. that anti-shifter lurking in every crevice of shiftblr could do it. you’ve always been capable. but you have to stop getting in your own way. stop doubting yourself. stop relying on others to tell you what’s possible. this is your journey. own it.
and above all, be patient. shifting is not a race. it’s not about how fast you can get there or how perfect your dr is. it’s about trust, intention, and focus. log off, tune into yourself, and let it happen. shifting has always been yours to claim. it’s not something you need permission for. it’s not something you need to earn. it’s just you, your mind, and your belief. always has been, always will be.
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dwaekkicidal · 4 months ago
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đ–Șđ—‚đ—‡đ—„đ—đ—ˆđ–»đ–Ÿđ—‹: 'đ–«đ—‚đ—đ—đ—…đ–Ÿ đ–±đ–Ÿđ–œ' àŒ„àż” 𝖡.𝖱.
‷ Size Kink | Stomach Bulge | Teratophilia (Wolf-Hybrid)
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♱ word count: 1.8k
♱ warnings: fem!reader, Red Riding Hood reader x Wolf Hybrid Chan, I never specify body type but this has stomach bulge & Chris is described to be bigger than the reader so read at ur own discretion, size kink, teratophilia, knotting, kinda corruption?, bribery/coercing, lowkey kinda mean chris (everyone act surprised. Sian wrote mean dom), rough sex + big dick chris with no mentions of prep, biting, public sex? Its in a forest but nobody is around, 1 use of “good girl’
sorta proofread
Kinktober Schedule
DO NOT republish or translate+post my work!
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“Tsk tsk tsk
 You should know better than to be this far out in the woods, Red. You know this is my territory.”
“C-Chris! Listen
 I’m really sorry but I need that plant over there. Grandma isn’t doing well and the only remedy that will help needs just a few of those flowers
” The tall man looks over his shoulder, eyeing the purple-colored flowers that you had pointed out.
“Hm
 Okay, you can have a few.” The bright smile that grew on your face was almost enough to let you take it for free. Almost.
“Thank-” “On one condition.” 
“C’mon, sweet girl. You know I don’t do things for free~” His rough fingers stroked your cheek and he couldn’t help but grin as your smile dropped. The canines that peeked out from behind his plump lips were enough to bring you back to reality and remind you that he was in fact still a wolf hybrid and not so much your “friendly” neighbor.
“What exactly do you want
?” His grin seemed to get wider before he took his bottom lip between his teeth. A predatory glint took over his eyes as he slowly looked you up and down.
“I have something in mind
”
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“Open the fuck up.”
His growl rumbles from deep within his chest and he thrusts his hips forward aggressively, causing you to cry out. Your thighs ache from the action, along with your swollen pussy thanks to the big dick that was currently tearing your insides up. You lost count after the first 5 inches, and now the seemingly never-ending length was quickly becoming too much for you.
He knew this all too well. But that didn’t stop him from forcing you and your little human body to take every last inch of his thick cock inside of you.
“C’mon Little Red, you can take it. You need to, remember?” He chuckles and pushes your thighs further apart. “You need those pretty little flowers, so you need to take my fucking cock.” His smile drops at the end of the sentence and he pulls out just to roughly thrust back inside. You moan out in surprise and his fingers dig further into your thighs, leaving crescent-shaped divots in your skin. 
“P-Please
” He clicks his tongue and leans forward more, shoving his face into your neck with another growl. With this, he manages to push another inch or two into your puffy hole, but your mind is so foggy that you don’t even notice it right away. The feeling of him breaching your walls so aggressively, all while he growls and huffs about how he needs to be all the way in for it to “count as payment” makes your head spin.
Even more so as a sob rips from your throat when he finally bottoms out. Your jaw drops and you squeal as his hips grind against yours, causing him to feel deeper all while he rubs against your G-Spot so perfectly. He throws his head back at the feeling of you completely wrapped around him and groans deeply when you clench subconsciously.
“There we go~ Good job, baby.” He licks a stripe up your neck before placing kisses all over it, letting you take a few seconds to breathe. He wasn’t that much of a brute- he did still care for you after all. Plus, what good is a new toy if you break it so early on!? So he takes a few seconds to himself, backing away and fixing his posture, allowing him to get a good look at you. And God do you look exquisite.
He licks his lips and looks over your body multiple times, doing everything in his power to burn this image of you into his head. He starts with your pretty lips, swollen and shiny with drool, and then your flushed cheeks that are wet from the fat tears that fall down them.
His eyes glance at your arms, smiling to himself at the army of goosebumps that have littered your skin as your body shakes deliciously with what he can’t decipher if it’s pleasure or pain. Your chest catches his eyes next; the way it heaves with each breath you take makes his chest swell with pride. But the thing that took the most of his attention, was the not-so-little bump on your tummy.
His lips were slightly parted and his breath was quickening as he lightly traced the outline of his dick. It’s at this point that he realizes just how large and wide he is compared to you. He’s always noticed- it’s quite hard not to. But when he has you like this, below him and completely at his mercy, he finally realizes just how much bigger he is. The sun only urges him further, casting a giant shadow over you that completely covers you and some of the ground you lay upon.
It makes his instincts go absolutely crazy and he can’t hold himself back from experimentally thrusting, moving at an angle that makes the bulge more prominent. The squeak you let out causes his eyes to flicker back up to your face, essentially snapping him out of the daze he was in. And when he meets your confused face looking up at him, he realizes how long he has been staring.
“Haha
 Take a look at this, baby.” He wipes some of your tears and tilts your chin to help you look down. The desperate moan you let out sends his ego to the moon, causing him to twitch against your walls. He huffs out a laugh in disbelief and begins to move his hips, thrusting into you slowly yet roughly.
“I’m so deep
 You feel that, baby?” His hand moves from your thigh and pushes down on your lower stomach, right on top of where the bulge popped out each time he bottomed out. “Fffuck.. ‘S my fat cock in your tummy?”
“God- Fuck, shut up Chris-” You clench tightly at his words despite your words and he ignores you in favor of picking up his pace, groaning when your walls flutter around him even more.
“You feel so fucking good. It’s almost like this pretty pussy was meant for me.” You swear you almost see his eyes roll into the back of his head, but he immediately brings your attention away by folding you in half. Pushing your knees to your chest and letting your ass hang in the air as he completely hovers over you, fucking into you with carnal need.
This new position makes you see stars and he uses it to his advantage, pounding into you and not allowing you time to think straight. He chases this brutal pace until your legs begin to ache, the pain of it overpowering the pleasure and making you hurriedly tap on his shoulder and push him back, “Fuck, wait- my legs.”
He huffs in annoyance but responds immediately, sitting up straight and allowing your legs to fall to his sides. His hips continue to thrust shallowly as you breathe deeply and try to rub the ache away, but this break doesn’t last long. You owe him payment, and he wants it now.
So he pulls out, opting to quickly flip you onto your knees and push your chest into the ground. You’re given no time to object before he’s shoving his entire length back inside with a groan. Your body shakes at the feeling of being absolutely filled to the brim. The back of your throat even itches as if his tip was poking it. And god, did it genuinely feel like that.
It’s not hard for him to find his previous pace, especially now that you’re seemingly more pliant for him. The only disobedient action from you is your cries for him to slow down, but he has no plans to. Not when you look absolutely ruined below him.
He shushes you and leans forward, holding you down with his chest against your back as he continues to fuck you as if his life depends on it.
“Shhhhh
 It’s ok, it’s ok. You’re gonna be good and take it right? You're gonna let the big bad wolf fuck your brains out? Yea?” Your fingers dig into the ground and you nod as best as you can with your cheek shoved against the floor.
He’s unhappy with the silent answer and bares his teeth, sinking them into your shoulder with a growl to “Use your words.”
“Y-Yes! Please, Chris!”
“Goood girl. Just sit there and take this fucking dick. Let Wolfy use you like the good chew toy you are.” The new name makes you clench tightly around him and he groans as you cum, causing the squelching noises to become even louder. He moans and nuzzles his face into your neck, leaving small kisses before he chomps down again.
The overstimulation is starting to hit and you cry out, desperately pushing against the ground in hopes of pushing your torso up and off the floor. But that’s not what good toys do. So he growls against your neck and pushes you down, wrapping a hand around the back of your neck to keep you in place as he fixes his posture.
“No. You’re gonna sit still. Good toys don’t fucking move. I can’t knot you if you’re misbehaving.” As if to prove his point, his other hand digs into your waist, holding you even more still as he rams into you.
Thanks to his thick tip incessantly knocking into your cervix, you don’t process what he says right away. At least, not until you feel an extra mass pushing against your swollen folds. “W-Wait, your knot?!?”
You hear his earrings jingle as he tilts his head and you can almost hear the shit-eating grin on his face as he mocks you. “Yes, my knot. You’re gonna take it inside of this tight. little. cunt. And you’re going to take every last drop of my cum.” You go to disagree but your body reacts on its own, clenching around him and trying to suck him in impossibly deeper.
“F-Fuck- feels like you do like that idea, baby.” He grits his teeth and starts to focus on sharp thrusts. Once his knot finally breaches your hole, you sob into your arm and bite into it to hold back a scream.
He whines and grinds into you, rubbing against your G-spot roughly as he pushes himself over the edge. You can feel his breath on your neck, heavy and heaving as he pumps you full of his seed. His body shakes with each spurt of cum he releases, and the overwhelming movements are enough to push you over the edge again; the needy grinding from him mixed with the mind-numbing feeling of being overfilled, yet forced to hold every last bit, pushing you towards another orgasm.
“Mmmm
 Hold it there, yeah? Keep my pups nice and safe in their new home, and I’ll let you take as many plants as you want. Deal, Little Red?”
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