#it was about HIM. it was about how HE felt about it. he had ZERO sympathy for me and i handled all his emotional labor

[artyandink]

UNCONSCIOUSLY SEXUAL.ᐟREADER, where you didn’t even know that most of the things you said, wore or did were kind of/very provocative. you were just… sweet, a total darling to the adults, which was why MARTHA and JONATHAN lent CLARK to help you when your house had been burgled and your parents were abroad, so they couldn’t help. Of course. your pretty little head didn’t know how a boy in your year who you’d been friends with since childhood, but you were happy to spend time with the all-american, thirsted over farm boy. He was just pretty (your brain knew better, he was hot as high hell. to the point where your panties got damp to the thought of his biceps).

CLARK was in a similar boat— he wasn’t sure how much longer he’d last— he wasn’t sweating bullets because of the heat, he was sweating due to the face that your pretty lips — shit, he hadn’t even thought that way about you before — were wrapped around your thumb after a sweet glass of lemonade, in a low-necked tank, high-cut shorts, and he was so sure that he could’ve seen baby pink lace peeking out from the waistband.

Whatever it was, it was killing him fast.

Plus, he knew those panties matched a nice lil’ bra in your room that he’d unintentionally seen when up there dropping off notes— just another thing that made his mind run circles. Like, c’mon, he knew for sure that his mom and dad taught him better than to think that way about girls who didn’t even mean to do it, his brain wired itself to think that way. Now that he mentioned it, that sounded like a really bad excuse, he just felt guilty for objectifying you.

It wasn’t just the provocative actions like bending over or accidentally saying things that sounded like they alluded to sex.

it was your big eyes. your pouty lips. your perfect legs and the swing of your perfect hips when you walked. how you were so innocent and didn’t have the foggiest clue what some guys wanted to do to your gorgeous body. your ass in the pretty skirts and shorts you liked to wear. the bows on all your clothes. How you tilted your head when you didn’t know something. The bat of your eyelashes when pleading for someone to do something for you— it almost always forced a hand.

CLARK had to remind himself to stay calm. composed. a friend—

“Clark, mmh,” oh, fuck, the pretty moan that slipped from your parted lips as your soaking pussy glided up and down his cock was intoxicating, CLARK’S head tipping back against the sofa cushions at the sound, hand smoothing up your hip, to your waist and back down over your ass and thigh. his other hand trapped your little pink panties in a tight fist, his mind subconsciously making a decision to keep it so he could use it as a poor substitute for this tight cunt, dear Lord.

He was probably going to hell for using the Lord’s name in this context.

“That’s me,” He nodded, voice cracking right before a whimper, an honest to God whimper left his mouth upon feeling your pussy clench around him and seeing how your cheeks were flushed, pretty lips in a perfect ‘o’ and how your gorgeous tits moved up and down in that tank top. Up and down, up and down— he was going to get hypnotised.

CLARK didn’t even know how he got here— his foggy memory recalling something like getting you straddling his thighs, slipping his fingers between your legs to find your perfect panties already soaked— if that’s what he did to you, who knew what else you’d do for him?

His jaw clenched, feeling rooted to the spot as his fingers dug into your ass— but it wasn’t even him moving you, you were doing it all on your own, being such a big girl and bouncing on his cock yourself, with small little whimpers every time he filled you to the brim. You were moaning about how he was “s’big” and how you were “s’full”, eyes rolled back with your fingers digging into his back and along his hair.

His head lolled forward, only to have his eyes zero in on how your pussy sucked in his cock to pair with his super hearing overwhelming him with the wet sounds and your little moans and babbling murmurs hit his ears like a freight train. He didn’t help his case, he’d begun to jerk his hips up only slightly— but to you that felt like a rough thrust that had you crying out his name. Perks of having superhuman strength, huh?

And superhuman sensitivity, any longer and he’d be in the same state as you.

“S’tight, don’t— don’tcha stop—”

Oh, too late. Guess it’s not your fault that you’re UNCONSCIOUSLY SEXUAL.

special tags 4 my clark moots: @faiszt, @blackynsupremacy, @angelbabyyy99, @svnriseblvdd if there’s anyone I forgot I apologise profusely also @cherrygirlfriend I told u about this so here’s my vision

had to do a new line to include the lovely @sabrinasopposite

[sc0tters]

Favourited Fantasies | Nico Hischier & Timo Meier

summary: when your boyfriend learns about your sexual fantasies, it's only right that he helps you explore it right?

request: yes/no

warnings: sexual themes, threesome, oral (f & m recieving!), unprotected p in v (wrap it before you tap it!), self masturbation? swearing.

word count: 6.58k

authors note: this is the first time I’ve written these two in a threesome pairing and it feels so good to be back into them and to return to the threesomes with something new! I also don’t think we’ve ever done a threesome when there has been an established relationship within it too. let’s all take a moment to acknowledge that if we didn’t have @sweethischier involved in this it would have come out in like months from now (you think I’m lying, I am not) because I had zero clue what to do with the concept of two Swiss kings!

He was your perfect little secret. 

Nico had been the man you called your boyfriend for the last four months now and you swore that everyday made him just a little more perfect. The only problem? Both your younger brothers were his teammates. And Jack especially, would have killed you both if he found out that lover boy on your phone was in fact his captain. 

Even as Jack warned all the players that you were off limits before they met you, those all seemed to leave Nico’s ears the moment he met you.

The sounds of cheers echoed throughout the prudential as the boys beat the Rangers “this is who I was telling you guys about.” Jack explained pulling your arm in their direction so that you could meet his friends “hi.” Your voice was quiet as you sent them a wave. 

Nico and Timo both looked at you, almost surprised that you looked that good. They knew it was weird but you immediately a sight for sore eyes as they forgot that it was your brother who stood between you and them “hey.” It was Nico who responded first and you felt like such a love-sick puppy afterwards. 

But luckily for you, that night, Nico got your Instagram handle from Jack and it seemed the two of you hadn’t looked back since. 

What Jack didn’t know was how all those nights you spent cancelling or trying to reschedule dinner with your brothers, you had actually been sipping a glass of wine as you spoke to his captain. Nico loved making you dinner as he not only got to spend time with you but he also got to finally not be eating his dinner alone. 

Nico smiled as you let out a laugh as the captain recounted the story of how he had walked in on Jack and his girlfriend on the couch “oh god don’t tell me you’re going to say what I think you will!” Your hand covered your mouth while your eyes went wide “it was even worse.” A groan left your lips as Nico nodded, knowing that it was an event that would forever be engrained in his brain, unfortunately. 

You ran your fingers through your hair as you looked at your watch “it’s getting late neeks.” You sighed, sipping the last bit of your wine “I told you next time I am cooking for you.” It was a promise you had given him last week when he cooked for you. 

It made him shake his head “like getting to cook for you.” His confession made your cheeks warm as he grabbed the plates from the table “then you should let me do the dishes.” You tried to stop him as he shook his head. 

He motioned to the bottle of wine that sat on the table “then why don’t you bring that with and we can make it a team effort.” You decided to accept his proposal “and whilst you’re at it why don’t you take the guest room here?” He added walking into the kitchen. 

The last thing that Nico wanted was for you end up in the back of an uber late at night and all alone “its not necessary.” Your words made Nico turn and give you the same stern look Ellen used to send you when she wanted you to accept what you were saying “I don’t want to inconvenience you.” The confession made his heartbreak as he placed the plates by the sink. 

His fingers pushed through his hair “I wouldn’t offer it if I wasn’t ready to give it to you.” He held his hand out for you to grab “and besides I like having you around.” The words made you smile as he hugged you. 

The warmth of his body made you melt in his touch “how much is that?” You teased looking up at him as he laugh “like so much.” More than you could have ever realised in that moment. 

Nico opted to finally tell you the truth, though. He was so beyond smitten with you that every time he saw you in the crowd, Nico liked to wish that you were there for him. Sometimes he did want to scream from the rooftops, but he knew that he would have been screwed if you didn’t feel the same way because he’d lose you and Jack for not listening about staying away. 

It was a rainy day in New Jersey as you stared out of the living room when there was a knock at the door “Nico?” You asked as you saw him burst through the door “are the boys here?” His question caught you off guard as you shook your head. 

You took a moment to acknowledge how the rain soaked his hair and shirt “we should get you out of these.” Your voice was soft as you got up with your arms crossed “i-i need to get something off of my chest first.” Nico raised his hand up to stop you. 

Nico was clearly nervous, which made you listen opting to halt your walk where you were “you can tell me anything Neeks.” You dropped your arms hoping he’d talk “I am in love.” The words made your heartbreak. You had been calling your mom to tell her all about how Nico made you feel, so to learn that he wanted someone else was the absolute punch in the gut that made you feel as if the air was forced out of you.

He pursed his lips together “and it makes me feel so sick because I can’t think about anything else but it.” His eyes scanned your face as he hoped that he could get something out of you that gave him the green light “what am I meant to do about this?” You didn’t mean to sound bad but you were genuinely confused about how it made him so anxious. 

At that moment he shut his eyes and let out a deep breath that he didn’t even know he was holding “I am in love with you.” The words made you feel light “and I know you might not feel the same way so for that I am so sorry.” Nico rambled on as you walked closer to him. 

You grabbed his hands “but I can’t even sleep some nights knowing that you aren’t mine.” His words made you smile “Neeks.” Your voice was soft “so I guess that I needed to just tell you this.” His lips began to tremble “Nico.” You repeated your words, trying to be a little louder this time.

But that did nothing “you just make me feel so-“”Nico!” You yelled cutting him off as he finally shut up. 

He looked at you now realising that you were that close to him “I love you, you idiot.” You laughed as you shook your head “really?” He asked thinking this was some joked as you pushed yourself onto your tippy toes to kiss him “really.” 

This was a secret that you had both grown to love, you occasionally do feel the strands of jealousy when girls flirt with Nico, but he was good at making sure the moment you were behind closed doors you knew he was yours. But what Nico didn’t expect was that he’d ever have to feel that level of jealousy, from a teammate no less.

It was the day of the family skate and as everyone’s kids were on the ice, Nico couldn’t help but stare at you as you talked with the young girls “can’t believe that she is Jack’s sister.” Timo sighed as he skated up to Nico, keeping his voice quiet “I mean she is like really pretty and nice and single.” He added on making Nico begin to process what had just been said. Nico finally coughed as he panicked, thinking that Timo knew about them “well we could never go for her.” Nico coughed rubbing the back of his neck as Timo nodded “trust me I know.” Timo sighed letting his eyes remain on you. 

Nico had forgotten about that conversation, or at least he really did until he started to wonder what it would be like to share you with someone. If Nico was nervous about asking you out then he was absolutely shitting it at the thought of you saying no, and possibly even breaking up with him over it. 

You had been struggling to fall asleep as burning thoughts caused chaos in your mind “what is your biggest sexual fantasy?” The question escaped from your lips as Nico turned around to see you staring at the ceiling “why?” He asked as he cocked his head propping himself up on his pillow. 

You turned to look at him “was just thinking about it?” Your confession made your cheeks feel warm “maybe sex at the Prudential?” He trailed off not entirely sure which one he would pick “you?”

It was only fair that you told him yours as well as he had now been honest with you “a threesome.” The words brushed past your lips as Nico ran his fingers over your cheek “am I now not enough?” He teased making you almost jump out of your bed. 

“Nonono.” You shook your head as he laughed making you realise that he was kidding “I just think it could be really hot being like shared y’know?” You asked as he nodded. Nico kissed your cheek as he pulled you closer to you “you want to tell me what else you’d want?” He asked rubbing a circle with his thumb against your thigh.

Things had remained calm for months, you and Nico were getting ready to start thinking about letting the people around you know about what had been going on between the two of you. Nico watched as Timo got more comfortable around you and Nico was curious if you even knew about what the boy had been doing. The captain swore that his teammate had caught you both but if he had then surely someone else would have right? 

You were doing your skincare when Nico walked out of the bathroom “schatz can I ask you something?” He asked, crouching down to be at your level “of course baby.” You nodded, shutting out your jewellery box as you took your watch off. 

Nico pressed a kiss on your forehead “remember when you said you wanted a threesome?” His words made you confused as you sceptically nodded along “if I made you mad then really forget about it because-” Nico cut you off as he pecked your lips. 

It made you wait wanting to hear what it was that he would say to you “I wanted to know if you had anyone in mind for it.” The words lingered in your mind as you sucked at your teeth, you shook your head as your thighs clenched “promise you won’t be mad?” You asked as you watched him pull you up so that he could hold your hands. 

Nico smiled almost amused by your concern “wouldn’t have asked you if I didn’t want to know liebling.” His words were like a comforting blanket that wrapped around you “it’s Timo.” You announced it as if you were ashamed letting your head look to the ground. 

A laugh echoed from Nico’s lips as he wanted to tell you all about how Timo thought you were cute “you like him?” The captain teased as you shook your head “I just think that he would fit into us pretty well.” It made Nico nod as he began to think about it. 

Maybe it was the fact that Nico certainly got off on roadies at the thought of you being his, but there was something about getting to watch someone else pleasure you that made him squirm “besides he already takes orders from you.” Your words made his cock strain against his shorts. 

There was an amused smirk on your face as you heard him grunt “you like giving orders?” You teased him as you ran your fingers over his cheek “want to see just how much I do?” Nico didn’t wait to pick you up as your legs wrapped around his waist.  

Your laughter could be heard from the room as you were sure you’d be up until the early hours of the morning, and boy were you right. 

It had been weeks since that night had gone down and you seemed to honestly forget about the conversation. Nico had been on a long roadie and had spent most afternoons praising you. 

Which was why when he came home randomly you really weren’t all too surprised “you’re such a pretty girl.” Nico cooed as he kissed up the inside of your thigh “fuck.” You gasped bringing your hands up to cup your breasts as his eyes stared into yours. 

His hand ran along your thigh “missed this cunt when I was away.” His fingers dropped down to your cunt, letting his thumb circle your clit “please neeks.” You begged, driving your heels into his back. 

Nico smirked softly kissing down your thigh as he stopped just above your cunt “please what?” He taunted you, clicking his tongue when you stayed quiet “just want you to fuck me.” You whined clenching your cunt around nothing. 

It was as if you were accepting some level of defeat when he pressed his thumb harder into your cunt “if you want to be my good girl then you should be asking me nicely.” His lips formed a pout as he rested his head against your thigh. 

Your lips formed a pout “please just make me feel good.” You pleaded stretching your legs out “I just wanna cum!” You drove your hips further into his hand as he instead pulled his hands away. 

Nico scoffed as you let out a whine “relax baby I just want to comfortable.” He explained, readjusting himself as he wrapped his arms around your legs. 

Your eyes didn’t leave his as you watched him build up saliva in his mouth that he then used to help wet your cunt. You whimpered watching it leave his mouth as it oozed onto your cunt “such a pretty girl.” Nico pressed a soft kiss against your clit, making you feel like the air was sucked out of the room in the process. 

Hands were quick to grip at his hair as he licked a stripe up your slit “such a sweet cunt too.” Nico moaned, letting his voice send shivers through your body “just like that.” Your thighs tried to push against his head as he sucked at your clit. 

When Nico asked Timo to come over earlier that morning during practice, Timo really wasn’t surprised. Not because he had a feeling you were going to be on your bed, being treated like his captain’s last meal. But rather because it was Wednesday, and Wednesday at home was for them to hang out.

The older boy reread the message telling him that he could just come inside when he arrived. His first red flag should have been the lack of anyone in the living room and the kitchen. But still Timo continued to look for Nico which when he finally heard the sounds of moans from Nico’s room it was all too late. 

With the door half open he saw everything. And there you lay naked and getting your cunt eaten out by his captain. Timo should have felt guilty for watching but it almost felt like his very own private show. 

And who was he to deny how sweet the sounds were as they escaped from your lips? But what he forgot was that if you aren’t quiwt you will get yourself caught.

Your moan had changed tones as Nico thrusted another finger into your cunt “Neeks.” You gasped, letting your eyes lock on Timo’s “yeah baby?” Nico asked finally looking in the direction that your eyes were. 

When he saw Timo it seemed like the older boy finally processed what was going on “shit I am-“ Timo went to apologise but he was cut off when Nico raised his free hand, motioning to his teammate to stop talking. 

Nico looked back at you “Timo had been telling me that you were pretty.” Nico’s words made you bite your lip as you clenched around his fingers at the thought “so why don’t you tell him Schatz about what you think?” He urged you to talk as he let his tongue swirl around your clit. 

You almost jumped at the stimulation “wanted to be shared.” Your cheeks were red as your hands gripped at the sheets beneath you “with?” You could barely hear Nico’s words as he didn’t bother to lift his mouth to speak.

Timo swore he was so close to feeling his jeans burst at the zip as his cock grew hard “you Timo.” Your eyes screwed shut, swearing you were close as Nico replaced his tongue with his thumb so that he could join the conversation “why don’t you come in here so you can see her properly?” Nico motioned to Timo to finally walk into the room.

But as the boy stood there Nico knew he needed to give Timo some encouragement to move “starting to look like he doesn’t want you doll.” Nico’s words made your lips form a pout. 

Timo was quick to shake his head “I do want you!” His voice was loud as he placed his hand on the door pushing it open to let himself in. It was the first time you properly saw the way his cock was strained against his jeans “fuck.” Your head fell onto your pillow as you felt your legs begin to shake “you see how close she is?” Nico asked as he softly nibbled at the skin on your thigh. 

You were a sight for sore eyes as Timo nodded “why don’t you come sit on this side of her?” Nico motioned to the other side of your bed “she loves cumming as she gets her tits teased.” The vulgerness of Nico’s words made you whine as your eyes never left Timo’s when he walked around. 

His eyes seemed to silently ask for permission to join you on the bed, to which you nodded “think you should give him a kiss pretty girl.” Nico cooed almost egging you on as he finally went back to sucking on your neglected clit. 

Timo watched you bite your lip as you used all of your strength to prop yourself up “hi.” His voice was soft as you let your lips clash with his. You moaned as his hand travelled down to your boobs, letting your nipple roll between his fingers as he turned it into a hard pebble. 

Nico watched on as he let his tongue fuck your cunt, occasionally coming back up to your clit. He was almost surprised that he didn’t feel jealous, in fact, Timo actually thought that the whole scenario was pretty hot. Occasionally he would grind his hips into the bed as he watched Timo start leaving a trail of sloppy kisses against your jaw “close-so close.” It was encouragement for Nico to increase his pace as Timo let his hand move to the other boob that had yet to be touched. 

The room felt hot as you collapsed onto the bed “I fuck please.” You begged as Nico let his lips pull away from your clit with a pop “you think that she has been good enough to cum?” He asked his teammate who turned to look at your face which was full of desperation. 

Timo nodded as he pecked your lips “looks like shes gonna beg soon.” There was a softness to him as he began to kiss you again. Nico nodded going back down to suck and kiss at your clit knowing that it would be what would push you over the edge. 

Sure Nico had played with your tits once or twice when he ate you out, but having that combined with another guy kissing you, you thought you were in a state of pure bliss. Timo’s mouth swallowed your moans as he continued to tease your nipples. Your legs shook against the sides of Nicos head as he didn’t stop his movements and actions until you had coated his tongue with your release “please.” You whimpered pulling away from Timo as Nico let his lips move from your cunt. 

He smirked at the sight in front of him “don’t tell me you’re already fucked out schatz.” Nico got up as he watched your chest heave “need a second.” You pleaded making him laugh.

You blew a raspberry into the air as you send him a nod, signalling to your boyfriend that you were ready “you seen how Timo feels about you?” The captain cooed as his eyes locked on the tent that had formed in his teammates jeans “you can’t blame me for this when she looks like this.” Timo’s words made you smile. 

Your thighs pushed together as you squirmed hearing his words “so why don’t you show him how happy you are now that he’s here?” Nico asked as he leaned forward to kiss you “show him how good you are with that mouth of yours.” He added as you let out a moan. 

You had noticed how they looked at each other “how come I’m the only one naked?” You whined as your lips formed a pout “take his top off if you want that to change.” Nico ordered, making you nod. 

Timo watched as you crawled towards him “you wanna let me take your shirt off?” You asked as he nodded “of course.” He smiled as your fingers brushed along his torso. 

Nico watched on as you pulled the piece of fabric off “gonna let her suck your cock?” The words made Timo groan “you ever thought about me doing that?” You teased allowing your mouth to water as you stared at his chiseled chest. 

Timo felt his body shake as your nails scratched his torso “so often.” Timo whimpered when you unbuttoned his jeans “you use your hand thinking it’s my cunt?” Your lips sucked at his ear lobe as he moaned. 

The older boy felt your hand tug his cock out of his boxers “you can tell me pretty boy.” You cooed, kissing his cheek as your thumb ran over the head of his cock. Using the precum from the tip as a soft form of lube “think about your mouth a lot too.” The confession made Nico smirk as he ran his fingers over your thigh. 

He almost felt neglected until he watched you send him a smile “you like my mouth too, no?”you asked as you moved to kiss Nico. 

Timo watched on as your hand continued to rub at his cock, going up and down. The sight made him feel dirty, here he was watching his captain kiss his girlfriend whose hand was wrapped around Timo’s cock “think you should show him just how perfect it is.” Nico ran his thumb over your lower lip as you nodded. 

You looked back to Timo who had his eyes half lidded when he stared at you “let’s get you out of these.” You let your hand leave his cock which made him whimper at the loss of contact. 

Timo was quick to lift his hips as you tugged at his jeans, pulling them down to get them off “now you look so good.” You cooed crawling between his legs as you leaned down to kitten lick his cock. 

The gesture made you smirk as his hands gripped at your hair “schatz don’t go trying to tease him.” Nico would have been the first to admit that he enjoyed watching you be in control for those few minutes, but now he wanted to remind you who was really in charge “sorry neeks.” Your lips formed a pout as you turned your head around to see him getting undressed now too. 

Nico shook his head “now go treat your guest well and maybe there might be something in it for you too.” The offer was enough for you to finally play nice. 

Timo swore he was dreaming as he watched your lips swallow his cock as your lips wrapped around it “holy shit.” He grunted, feeling a pure sense of ecstasy. 

You hollowed out your cheeks as you let him help guide you to take more of him “she’s a fucking whore ain’t she?” Nico asked as his hands gripped at your hips “she’s so good at it.” Timo whined as your hand cupped his balls. 

The captain nodded as he directed his cock over your slit as he watched your cunt ooze its slickness out, he was lucky that he didn’t just go back to eating you out. The sight was out and open for him to get how he wanted it “fuck.” Your words sent shockwaves through Timo’s body as he tightened his grip on your hair. 

Nico felt his head drop back as he moaned, slowly watching his cock get swallowed by your cunt “baby keep on just getting him off so you can cum too.” Nico offered making your cunt clench around him “please just let me.” Timo nodded as he felt your throat constrict around his cock as you tilted your jaw to take more of him. 

You took his cock out of your mouth “you look so pretty like this.” You moaned going to suck at his balls as your hand rubbed his cock, your pace matching Nico’s thrusts. 

The sound of skin slapping echoed off of the walls of the room “fuck baby, is this what you wanted?” Nico asked as you nodded, letting out a whimper when your lip was caught between your lips. The captain raised his hand to slap your ass “we give you exactly what you wanted, and now you want to just keep yourself all quiet?” Nico scoffed as he shook his head “show Timo all those pretty noises that you know how to make.” Nico glared at Timo with a sense of jealousy that washed over him. It wasn’t Nico who changed his mind,  but he did want Timo to remember that you were off of the market. That you getting to fuck Timo tonight was not going to be an everyday occurrence. 

You moaned, bringing the boys attention back to you “so hot.” You moaned, letting his balls drop from your mouth with a pop “love it.” You nodded going back to suck at his cock. 

Nico began to speed up the pace of his thrusts, craving that release, “I’m close.” Timo confessed as his cock throbbed. Your mouth sucked at his cock like a straw “fuck I think she is close too.” Nico let his thumb circle your clit once more knowing that it would push you over the edge.

The older teammate grunted as he watched your eyes look up at him through your thick lashes “c’mon pretty girl.” Timo pleaded as he nodded, watching you hollow your cheeks as you massaged his balls to get him over the edge “just f’me.” He nodded thrusting his hips into your face when his eyes screwed shut.

Timo felt his chest heave as he came, letting his release spray sticky ropes down your throat “fuck please don’t stop.” He didn’t want to let this end as you finally turned your head to look back up at him as his cock fell out of your mouth “tastes so good.” You moaned, feeling his thumb slot into your mouth. 

If he thought he was done, he was already hard again. The cum that had dribbled out of your mouth was now saved by his thumb and brought back into your lips “still such a little whore.” Timo teased as he brought his hand down to cup your breast “fuck baby.” Nico moaned as your cunt throbbed around him, sending thoughts to his mind about wanting to put a baby into your belly as you took every last drop that he possibly had to offer. 

A cry left your lips as you moaned, feeling your legs begin to shake “please.” Tears formed in your eyes as Timo looked to Nico who nodded “go on sweet girl.” Nico gripped your one hip as he quickened his thumbs pace on your clit. 

Your head felt heavy as your body shook. Your eyes screwed shut as your cunt clamped down around Nico’s cock as you came. Timo pulled his thumb from your mouth so that he could hear all the little noises that escaped from your lips “feel so-�� you cut yourself off with a moan as Nico continued to thrust into you, once and then a second time too. 

His release came shortly after your own “fucking hell doll.” Nico huffed as he pulled his cock out of you, watching both of your releases mixed together as it oozed out of you “can’t be having this.” The captain clicked his tongue as he scooped the release with his two fingers before he forced it back into your cunt. 

The movement made your body collapse into Timo’s body, he watched you rest your head on his chest “schatz you think you have room to handle one more?” Nico asked as he got up. 

You watched him move the single seater that sat by your side of the bed “you had enough?” You furrowed your brows, growing alarmed that he had changed his mind. 

The boy smiled turning around to lean down and kiss your lips “I am perfectly fine.” He swore hoping you knew he was serious “I just want to watch him with you.” Those words had your squirm, forcing your thighs together as you nodded. 

Nico caught the gesture as he smirked “seems like you want that to happen as well.” A wave of mischief flashed across his eyes as he made the mental note of that being something that seemed to turn you on. 

The captain knew that you loved him and that nothing would change between the two of you “have fun liebling.” He mumbled pressing another kiss on your lips before he sat down on the chair. 

His legs spread as he palmed at his cock “we don’t have to if you don’t want to.” Timo’s voice almost reminded you that he was there “I want to.” You frowned turning to see his face full of uncertainty. 

You slowly crawled back to Timo so that you could kiss him “you gonna let me?” You asked making him nod as you kissed him. 

Nico watched on as your hand grazed his teammates jaw. Timo’s hands gripped at your hips “fuck.” Nico grunted, wrapping his hand around his cock as he gripped at his member rubbing his hand up and down. 

Timo pulled away from you “gonna let me fuck you?” He asked, flipping you both over when you nodded. Sure he was tired but he could see there was no way that you’d be able to fuck him properly “please Timo.” You nodded, gripped at his hair when he kissed down your neck. 

He knew you’d be ready to fuck, but still, he wanted to get a chance to worship you in between “such a pretty girl.” Timo cooed, kissing at your collarbone. The older boy sucked at your skin so that he could mark you. 

He leaned forward as he stopped, opting to look at you instead “you ready?” Timo asked rubbing the head of his cock over your slit, teasing your clit “yeah.” You whimpered as your eyes screwed shut feeling him bottom you out. 

Timo went slowly, not stopping until your hips were met with his ‘fuck.” you both whispered, taking a moment to breathe as you both took a chance to adjust to how his cock felt in your cunt “you can.” You tapped his arm looking into his eyes as you nodded, giving him the green light to start moving again. 

His hips pulled away before he slapped them back into yours, repeating that gesture once, twice, and then a third time. Each was met with a moan as he brought your legs onto his shoulders. 

Nico watched on as his cock throbbed against his palm, the way your body jolted was something he never got to savour when he was the one who was fucking you “feels so good.” You confessed turning your head to look at Nico who felt his ego get brushed as your eyes traveled to his hand. 

There was a sense of desperation in his pumps, watching you look as if your mouth was watering “you like the way his cock fucks you sweet girl?” Nico felt his stomach tense as you nodded, feeling TImo kiss the skin of your shoulder. 

Even as Nico’s cock was longer, Timo felt girthier, practically stuffing you to the brim, with your previous orgasms being used as some form of lube as he continued to fuck you “so good.” You repeated those words, bringing your hands down to cup your tits so that you could tease your nipples. 

The older boy wasn’t trying to push your boundaries as you figured that he didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable “you weren’t lying that she’s perfect.” Timo groaned as skin slapping echoed against the walls making his skin feel on fire “hear that pretty girl, he thinks that you’re perfect.” Nico smirked letting his head drop back, your cunt clenched at the praise making Timo’s strength waiver.

It brought him back to life almost, reminding him each time that this wasn’t a dream and that he really was getting to fuck you “you like it when he praises you like that?” Timo sucked at your earlobe “yes.” Your head bobbed as your voice cried out.

Nico could see how you chewed at your lip “she is gonna cum soon.” Nico confessed, seeing your cues as he nodded “go play with her pretty little clit to get her over.” He added knowing that it was always the way to make you see the stars.

TImo nodded as he propped one hand up by your head and let his other drop to your clit where his thumb found a home. He circled the sensitive nub as he watched your legs begin to shake, causing him to increase his pace as he was desperate to finish with you. 

You arched your back, driving your hips into Timo so that you could reach the high you so desperately craved “fuck fuck fuck!” You chanted a slew of words as your eyes screwed shut when your cunt clenched around his cock, using the short bursts to push him over the edge. Timo dropped his head on your chest as he began to slow down his thrusts until they came to a complete stop. By the time your eyes had opened, you saw that Nico had finished in his hand, too, as you sent him a fucked out smile. It reminded him of how you would look at him if he brought you a coffee as you slept, only waking up when you heard him place the cup on your bedside table.

As Timo pulled out of your cunt his cock went limp making him moan. He watched your eyes begin to close “I’m done.” You announced, unsure that they would try to push you through another round. 

Nico’s laugh pulled your attention in his direction “you want a bath schatz?” He offered, getting a paper towel to wipe up his release that had been caught in his hand “you gonna join?” You looked at Timo who looked like a deer caught in headlights. 

A cough got caught in his throat as he shook his head “I should get going.” Timo leaned down to press a kiss against your cheek. 

What he didn’t want to do was overstay his welcome as Nico nodded “you know how to let yourself out right?” Nico’s words made you glare at him “yeah I’ll let you rest.”Timo squeezed your hand as he pulled his pants up. 

Nico sat next to you “well I’ll see you tomorrow then.” The boys had were leaving for a game the next day and they were meant to be sat next to each other on the plane. 

Timo got up as he sent you one last look “thanks for the day?” His words made you smile when you nodded “you too T.” You rested your head against Nico’s shoulder. 

The boy got to the door as you clicked your tongue “Timo?” You called out making him whip his head around as he nodded “yeah?” In that moment he swore you were going to call him back into the room. 

But when Nico kissed your cheek it felt like a bubble had been burst over his head “could you keep Nico and I dating to yourself?” You asked, Nico nodding in agreement “your secret is safe with me.” It wasn’t surprising that the two of you hadn’t told anyone, but somehow being someone who knew of the secret stung Timo’s heart. 

You mouthed a ‘thank you’ before the boy left “you have a good time?” Nico asked looking at your eyes “the best time Neeks.” You nodded watching him stand up. 

He was quick to pick you up “what are you doing?” You cocked your head, running your fingers over his shoulder “just making sure that my girl knows that I’m the one who takes care of her.” Nico’s possessiveness made you smile. 

You pressed a kiss against his cheek when he walked you into the bathroom before he kicked the door shut “as fun as it was to watch you with him and I am glad you had fun.” Nico began running the bath as his eyes never left your naked body “some things shouldn’t be shared?” You asked as he nodded, walking back over to you as he placed his hands on your cheeks. 

He was glad you understood where he was coming from “hey now not many people would let another guy fuck him to begin with.” You softly laughed as you kissed him. 

The gesture was sweet “I love you.” Nico confessed as you smiled “I don’t know how I got so lucky with you.” Your words made his heart bloom, feeling as if he was in fact the lucky one because you put up with him.

So as joy spread in the bathroom as the soft scents of rose and lavender invaded your nostrils from the bubble bath Nico poured into your bath. Timo was back in his car as he wondered why Nico was the one you picked, sure he never even knew it was a competition. 

But his body longed to be with yours, his mind craved your presence as his ears yearned for your laughter. All Timo truthfully knew was that this was going to be a long season for him if you were going to stay Nico’s. 

Before Timo could fully pick a plot though, Luke had ended up in your apartment. When Nico was there too, and that’s when your brother and everyone else learnt about the man you called yours.

Now it was going to make it a lot harder to get you into the Prudential Center quietly, because of course you needed to give Nico a chance to experience his own fantasy too.

[blood-smiles]

𝐇𝐈𝐉𝐎 𝐃𝐄 𝐋𝐀 𝐋𝐔𝐍𝐀࣪ ִֶָ☾✴︎˚｡⋆

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄! 𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄𝐋 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 - MDNI TW!! suggestive thoughts and actions coming from yandere . yandere character . defo unprofessional behavior from reader . TO BE CONTINUED!!

╰┈➤ the white flashing of your camera lit up the room, capturing a perfect moment in time inside your device.

Scrolling through the pictures with your thumb, you nodded wordlessly at the various pictures. Perfect and beautiful.

Just how you liked it.

Packing up your gear, you decided it was time you went home, you were tired. Really tired from taking so many pictures, you felt a migraine coming from a mile away.

The soft patter of rain met your eardrums, letting you know it was drizzling and would probably last for a while.

You walked slowly, umbrella in hand, staring at the moon above while rubbing the sides of your head. The soft crashing of the waves hitting the rocks nearby.

Plugging in your headphones and playing some soft music while you walked to your house.

You counted the stars in the sky as you walked along the beach.

“ ♪ Luna quieres ser madre?.. y no encuentras querer que te haga mujer, dime Luna de plata.. Que pretendes hacer con un niño de piel.. ah-ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-ah.. Hijo de la luna.. ♪ “

You came to a stop, seeing a taller (wo)man (?) leaning against the railing, strange that they were out so late. It was so dark already, what could they possibly be doing out here, in the rain of all places?

Their heterochromatic eyes gazed up at the sky too. Their face solemn and distracted, the rain pouring down over their head and back, their light blue—almost white, wavy hair dampened and forming beautiful coils.

They were so pretty, looking like an angel under the moonlight.. Were your spidey senses tingling right now? You just felt like you should approach them.

“Excuse me.” You interrupted softly, holding out your umbrella over their head, stopping the rain from dampening them even more.

“..What?” Oh, they had a deep voice.. you were caught off guard, they had very feminine traits and flowing long hair, so you just kind of assumed..

“Here.” You handed him your umbrella, which he accepted hesitantly, his hand shaking as he held the handle of the umbrella.

His eyes snapped towards your face, looking deeply into your eyes, looking for a sign of deceit or malice, but only finding kindness and genuine empathy.

His cheeks flushed a little, his ears turning red as he admired your features… how would it feel like if he ran his tongue along your cheek?—What. What was he thinking?!

His fingers slightly grazed your own, sending shivers down his vertebrae and sending his heart into overdrive. 

Snatching the umbrella, holding it close to his chest as he stepped back a little.

“You know, I hope this doesn’t sound creepy but, you’re stunning— You should try modeling! Who knows, maybe one day I’ll photograph you.” 

You joked lightly, putting your hands above your head to shield yourself from the water.

His free hand shakily lifted to cover the bottom portion of his mouth, pupils blown wide as he stumbled back a little. 

..That was the cutest interaction he had ever had up to this point in his entire life. That bashful smile— The twinkle in your (e/c) eyes— everything about you had him in a trance!

“G-Get lost!” He yelled, tightening his hold around the umbrella and running away, his heart beating in his ears, heart swelling and feeling the wings of a swarm of butterflies nicking his guts.

You were left standing under the rain, rethinking your wording and kicking yourself in the stomach  internally for scaring off a potential client.

And… that was the last time you saw him, or so you thought.

Oblivious to you, he just ran off because his heart was in over drive and might have exploded from a cuteness attack.

He glanced down at your umbrella, his eyes zeroing in on the small writing on the handle, ‘Y/n L/n’? That was the name of the cute idiot he met?

Looking up the name all results showed up, your face everywhere! He shakily touched your “face”,  staring into your eyes for an alarming amount of time.

A famous photographer, huh?.. He thought about what you said.. A model? Him? Well, wouldn’t hurt to try.

3 years later…──★ ˙📷 ̟ !!

You had been hired, a big shot model was coming to your studio to get some magazine pictures done.

You opened the models portfolio, checking out some news about him too, he had gone viral lately. 

“Son of the moon’? Huh, interesting.” You mumbled, taking in the model’s proportions, his face rung a bell in your brain. But as hard as you tried to get your synapses to connect, you just couldn’t form a coherent memory..

‘Mikhail White’ …

You chalked it up to seeing him in magazines or social media.

Putting the portfolio aside, your feet pushed you on your own feet, walking over to your setup and making minor tweaks to your studio.

“(Y/n), they’re here.” The voice of your assistant interrupted your movement, nodding your head you put your hands over your professional camera and looped it over your neck.

You stepped back, letting the makeup artist enter with their big box of makeup supplies, then came in the manager of the model, eyes sharp and analytical as she clasped her clipboard in her arm.

And finally, the model entered. The star of the show, Mikhail, A pretty average sized person, for a model, that is. He stopped in front of you, staring you down with those uniquely colored eyes.

You got that feeling again, was it Deja vu, perhaps? Their eyes hit a chord in you, yeah. You had seen them before.. Just where?

“Welcome, thank you for hiring me.” You smiled warmly, turning your gaze to the manager, extending your hand out for a friendly handshake.

The woman scoffed softly, shaking her head “No thank you, I don’t do handshakes.” The tall woman gently replied, although it sounded more like a mother scolding her child.

“O…Okay.” You laughed nervously, letting your hand begin to drop to your side.

“Thank you for having me here, (Y/n).” The model suddenly spoke, gently taking your hand and shaking it before it could totally fall.

“Oh, um. Yeah, for sure!” Taken off guard you reciprocated the hand shake before letting go, his hand not letting go completely.

You pulled your hand free with a soft tug, turning to sit down on your chair as you wait for the makeup artist to doll up the male.

You stared at him from a distance, you felt like he had curly hair, but instead were met with silky, straight hair running down his back.

Mikhail was shaking, his hands quivering on his lap as he looked through the mirror on the vanity. He stared at your form through the reflective surface, watching how you scrolled through your phone or opened the portfolio with his pictures.

Did you think he was attractive? Did you like his hair? He decided to try something new for you, he hoped it caught your eye…

He gently bit down on his bottom lip, looking down to let the artist work on his eyeshadow, he wanted to physically recoil from the person’s hands, wishing it was yours instead.

He had worked up to this point for three whole years, all just to be photographed by you, one of the best photographers in the whole industry.

Ever since that night, under the pouring rain, he couldn’t wipe you off his brain, you were like a drug,the image of you gnawing at his sanity. It hurt so good though, so good he couldn’t stop and soon found himself addicted.

You indirectly changed his life, he went from being a pathetic nobody to one of the most popular and influential models of his time, and honestly.. It was all thanks to you, even if you don’t remember him.

Mikhail dressed in a lacy attire, showing off part of his stomach and most of his thighs, his hair decorated with small silver clips and silk bows, beautiful diamond earrings hanging off his ear lobes.

His face sparkled with glitter, long white eyelashes fluttering, his visage was that of perfection. Comparable to an arctic fox nestled in silks and diamonds, you could see why the media called him the ‘son of the moon’ more clearly now.

“Wow, you look beautiful.” You complimented, leading him to the middle of the shot, he looked up at you, not saying anything, however the flush of his ears said different.

Now, if you remembered correctly, the theme was ‘wedding after-party’ although you didn’t know it was going to be this suggestive..? You did agree to it so no backing out anymore, you suppose.

You had something in your mind already so you just ran with it, the manager agreed with your idea too, you expected her to spit in your face and tell you no in all honestly..

He gazed at the camera with a sultry gaze, imagining it was you he was looking at, he did as you asked, allowing you to brush some of his hair or to position his soft strands as you wished.

He peered up at you through his eyelashes, looking almost desperate, leaning into your touch subconsciously. This had been a fantasy of his for a long time, a real wet dream for him.

In fact, he had pressed for the theme to be more suggestive, wanting you to see him in a more intimate scenario.

In the last shots of the session, everyone came to an agreement to put some false cake frosting pieces over Mikhail, leaning more into the wedding cake aspect.

You dipped your hand in the substance, grabbing some in your hands and leaning down to smudge some over his face, dropping some here and there strategically.

You took your camera back in your hands, positioning it perfectly for it to capture the scene’s beauty and allure.

The ice blue haired man bent and arched his body any and all ways you desired, placing his hands on his lap as he took some of the frosting on his finger and brought it up to his mouth, licking it, sending you the most loving and passionate gaze he could muster. 

Wordlessly hinting with just his sharp eyes how much he wanted something other than a few pictures, something that was spelled with four letters, D-A-T-E.

That..wasn’t scripted, but you just went with it and snapped a few pictures. You leaned back in your chair, stretching out the knots in your back and listening to the pops in your spine.

That was the last of the shots, all you need to do now was transfer the pictures to his manager and get a sweet sweet wad of cash back.

You smiled at the thought, sighing pleasantly.

You bid the trio of workers goodbye, although the rosy cheeked model stayed back, approaching you and putting a small piece of paper in your hand shyly.

Right before you were about to say something he shut you up by pecking your cheek gently.

“Thank you.” He mumbled, his voice soft and heartfelt, it was more…intimate, more meaningful than a simple ‘thanks for taking my pic’, he made it sound like you had just swooped in like Superman and saved his life.

He clasped his hand over yours, making sure you kept the paper in your hand as he began leaving hastily, not lingering for a moment more or less.

‘Go out on a date with me..? XXX-XXX-XXXX ♡’

Well shit. Things just got a whole lot interesting.

[sad-solaris]

Guess? - Sirius Black

Summary: Sirius loves to guess the color of his girlfriends underwear

Warnings: suggestive, allusions to sex but not the actual act (foreplay), drinking, female reader

Word count: about 1500

A/N (Please read!): Hello!! Okay, I haven’t written anything in close to 7 years and never on this blog so fair warning for everything that follows. I’ve also never written anything smutty before so again, sorry if this is terrible🤍 I would like to continue with writing on this blog but would love to hear any thoughts you have when reading this! English isn’t my first language so warning for that too.

Again, I haven’t written in several years so preemptive excuses for any mistakes. I’ve just been listening to Charli’s guess a lot, and the marauders are my current muses so🤷🏽‍♀️, enjoy I guess!

(This was also written on mobile so again, again, again -Sorry!)

It’s unlike Sirius to be so disenchanted with the lively atmosphere of Londons nightlife. but on this specific outing he can hardly be at blame for the daze clouding his mind.

There’s a step down from the bar area to the dance floor, giving those lingering by the bar an overlook of the crowd dancing the night away. Sirius takes a sip from the bottle he ordered from the bar, the fizzy liquid does little to quell his racing pulse.

His eyes scan over the crowd for a short instant, he didn’t need to search particularly hard before he zeroes in on one person in particular. Your hair catches the color changing lights as it sways with your carefree movements, the pinstripe pants clings to your hips and bottom in a way that makes Sirius’ mouth dry up quickly despite his attempts to water it with the bottle in his hand, a hand coming up to tug a lock of dark hair behind his hair.

The black vest you recently purchased clung nicely to your body, accentuating your chest in a way that made his jeans tighten.

Sirius’ eyes swept over your frame several times before they once again focused on your hips. The pants were a favorite of his, and although floor length pants in any other circumstance may be a more modest clothing item, the pinstripe pattern stretched deliciously over your ass making Sirius tighten his grip on the bottleneck.

Sirius was enchanted with the sight on the dance floor, your hips swaying to the beat of the music. Despite the wonderful sight in front of him, Sirius couldn’t help his imaginative mind from wondering what might hide beneath those pants he was so infatuated with. The longer Sirius’ eyed your dancing form, the further his mind wandered from the London club. If you had gotten ready at your shared apartment he would have had the luxury to participate in your pre-party routine. Your usual shared routine having been passed over in favor of you getting ready at Marlenes, the birthday girl having summoned her closest girlfriends for pregames at her apartment.

Sirius was obviously no stranger to the body beneath your clothes. Much to the annoyance of the rest of the marauders who had been forced to listen to him wax poetically about your legs, the curve of your arms, and that oh so pretty neck of yours. No, Sirius was no stranger to your body. But standing here in this nightclub, Sirius liked to imagine what you were hiding under your pants.

Was it the pretty pink pair he had picked up a few months back? The ones with the matching bra? He recalls how your face had flushed when he held up the magenta colored piece of fabric, and how you had tried to argue that you were in no need for even more clothes, but had shut up when he so easily countered that “darling, I’m a selfish man, if anything this are more for me than they are for you”. And true to his words, Sirius was more than satisfied with the way the pretty pink had laid against your skin. His hands had mapped out every crease and crevice of your lingerie clad body later that night.

The jeans he had chosen for tonight suddenly felt even tighter than they had a minute ago. His eyes still never leaving his dancing girlfriend. But ones again they drifted down to your ass. Maybe you had forgone the pink pair today, he can recall that you wore them not too long ago to a date night. Perhaps you had decided on the nude colored ones, the ones that give the illusion that you weren’t wearing any at all?

Sirius thinks back to several weeks ago, on one of those odd mornings where he had been up with the sun, leaving you to rest for a little while longer. He had sat by the kitchen window sipping his morning coffee and looking out onto the street below, anything but envious as he watched passersby fight against the cold winds of a rainy morning. He had greeted you with a smile when as you joined him in the kitchen, the pajama pants you’d borrowed from him hung low on your hips. Sirius eyed you with that same easy smile as you walked over to the counter to get your own cup.

His breath had however caught in his throat when you had reached up into the cupboard for your favorite mug. The simple t-shirt you were wearing rising up. From where he sat a couple meters from you it appeared that you had forgone wearing underwear under the borrowed pajama pants. The image had had his boxers tighten slightly and distracted him enough to the point where he barely noticed that you had turned around to lean against the counter, your coffee mug nestled in your hands.

His attention drew back to your face as you addressed him by name, “hmm what was that darling?“

“oh nothing Siri, you just seemed distracted“. Sirius licked his lips, his own mug long forgotten on the kitchen table. His eyes drew back to your face as his lips curled into a confident smirk, “You know I’m always distracted when you’re around love“ he spoke lowly as you hid behind your coffee mug, “did you forget your underwear this morning darling?“ he had continued in an attempt to fluster you further. Your brows had furrowed, “what do you mean?“, you lifted your t-shirt to above your bellybutton reveling the skin colored sheer pair you were wearing, Sirius’ eyes darkening at the action. “I guess they kind of look see through“ you had chuckled before taking another sip.

Your brows had furrowed when your usually talkative boyfriend hadn’t answered with a quip of his own. Your mug lowering to reveal the hungry look in his eyes, the tight fabric around his crotch indicating that the otherwise quiet morning wouldn’t last very much longer.

“Careful, anyone who doesn’t know you might think you’re an ogling creep“ Sirius couldn’t have hindered how his body jumped as Lily appeared at his side, a self-satisfied smirk taking over her face at having successfully frightened the otherwise confident man. “har-har Evans, I happen to know someone even worse than me“. Lily chuckled as he tried to divert the attention towards James and away from himself, “She looks good tonight” she continued, ignoring his attempted diversion.

Sirius’ attention returned to your smiley face, your body swaying with the music as you and Marlene serenaded each other the song currently playing from the speakers, your hands outstretched towards one another. Even if he had tried to, Sirius doubted he could’ve stopped the genuine smile that stretched wide over his lips, pointedly ignoring how Lily muttered a short ‘whipped’ before leaving him alone once again, that previous smile never leaving her own lips. Sirius could barely wait to get you alone, suddenly thankful that the taunt fabric of his jeans hid at least some of his growing affection.

-

Later in the evening, as Sirius has you laid out in front of him on your shared bed, your heaving chests pressed tightly against each other as you seem to breathe in tandem. Sirius’ lips briefly leave yours in favor of roaming your neck, leaving teasing nips at your skin. Your heavy breaths intermingled with soft moans when bites down particularly hard at the junction between your neck and shoulder. The sounds are music to his ears as he works your pants zipper down, the buttons of your vest top already having been worked open in the hallway, a darkening mark just above the cup of your bra replacing the fabric that had previously covered that spot.

A particular high moan pulls Sirius away from your neck, admiring the tiny bite marks he’s left behind. He straightens up between your legs at the foot of the bed. Sirius looks at your face, the adoration in your eyes make him simultaneously want to melt through the floor boards and scream at the top of his lungs, happiness radiating off of him in waves.

His eyes travel down your body for the millionth time today as his hands finish pulling down the zipper, a gentle pat at your thigh signaling for you to raise your hips as he works your pants down your legs, they’re discarded in a pile on the bedroom floor as his attention once again this evening returns to your hips, this time unhindered by any fabric as he takes in the lacy black material of your underwear. Trailing his fingers along the waistband and over the little bows sitting at both sides just above your hip bone.

The soft wine of his name finally pulls Sirius’s attention back to you. The pupils of his eyes having nearly taken over that lovely shade of grey you’re so used to. His grin widens when your eyes meet, you beckon him back up to your lips, desperate to feel the closeness he’s depriving you of.

But you can’t be to upset when instead of crawling back up to your lips he sinks to the floor on his knees, his hands and eyes once again returning to your underwear.

Perhaps he was wrong in his guesses at the club, but Sirius can’t seem to pay any mind to that right now. Not when your breathy calls of his name intermingles with the soft moans of earlier.

[corvid-language-library]

A life-changing moment

I was thinking the other day about how I came to be in Japan, and how my life could've been so very different had I not gone with my brother on the day he left for university.

You see, I had no interest in going to uni at age 16. Mostly because I was severely depressed and figured I wasn't going to make it to the end of my teens. My plans largely revolved around my band getting famous, or getting a book published, or being discovered by some acting talent scout (despite having exactly zero talent for acting) or something. I hated school and the thought of doing more school just sounded unbearable. My brother was the clever, academic one; not me. So when I went with him that morning in late September, I didn't expect anything to change.

Except I fell in love with the place. It wasn't school; it was a whole new world, with a lake and stunning architecture and gardens and people walking around in the kind of clothes I got bullied for wearing. So I did a complete 180 and decided (much to my father's despair) that I did want to go to uni after all.

While I was at uni, I made friends from all walks of life. All corners of the world. Specifically, Norway.

A couple of years later, I decided I missed being able to speak a second language (my French had been pretty good years before, but I'd forgotten most of it by that point). It was a toss-up between German, Norwegian and Finnish. German because I already knew some, had a cousin living in Cologne and figured it would be useful. Finnish because my music and pole dance idols were Finnish. Norwegian because I had a handful of friends I met at uni from Norway. I decided I wasn't that passionate about German, which left Finnish and Norwegian.

I decided on Finnish.

Went to the bookstore ready to start my journey. I went to the language section and... not a single book on Finnish. But there was a single Teach Yourself Norwegian book. And so, I picked that up instead, and thus started my Norwegian journey.

Fast forward a little and I find myself on langblr. I make lots of langblr friends and even, for a time, run a semi-popular blog. Norwegian was my one true love, of course; nothing could change that. Until someone I'd admired for years started learning Japanese. It was a language I'd always been somewhat interested in but completely adamant I could never learn because it's "too difficult". But seeing her study it made me curious. "Maybe I'll just try to learn some hiragana," I told myself.

If you've known me long enough, perhaps you'll remember that phase I went through where I completely denied I was learning Japanese. "I'll get bored of it," I kept saying. "It's fun right now because I'm in the beginner stage, but as soon as I have to put effort into it I'll give up."

And then I bought a nice notebook and a Japanese textbook and I started making flashcards and practising kanji. Oops.

Covid happened. I started teaching English online because I couldn't teach pole from home and I needed a new source of income. I liked it, but I hated being stuck behind a desk. I wanted to teach in a real classroom. I knew the possibility of getting a TEFL job in Norway was next to zero, especially with Brexit and all. But Japan...

And so I looked into it. And now I'm here.

I wonder how different my life would have been had I, on that unassuming Sunday morning in late September, opted to stay at home and play video games. Would I have ever gone to visit my brother at uni? Probably not; I didn't drive, and that's the year my mum got cancer and I got my first boyfriend, so it's not like I'd have had much inclination to go visit. And had I not seen that campus for myself, would I ever have gone to uni? Would I have made Norwegian friends? Would I have chosen to study Norwegian? Would I have stumbled upon langblr? Would I have made the same langblr friends? Would I have felt inspired to just try learning Japanese?

Maybe I would've found a different route here. Maybe I'd have found myself somewhere completely different.

It seems so silly to think that my life-changing moment was, actually, just the choice to leave the house one day. And yet.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say here, if anything at all. Perhaps all I'm trying to say is that life-changing moments don't just come up to you and punch you in the face; they're the result of long chains of actions that spiral wildly out of control, all starting from an unassuming Sunday morning when you decided to leave the house instead of rotting at home.

[mariacallous]

The snow lay in drifts over the railway lines at Auschwitz, when Keir Starmer went to pay his respects last week. His wife, Victoria, the granddaughter of Polish Jews who fled to sanctuary in England, stood beside him in the biting cold looking out over the tracks that once ferried unimaginable numbers of people to their deaths.

Afterwards, the prime minister talked about the relics of the dead discovered when the concentration camp was liberated: the piles of shoes, many in children’s sizes, and the suitcases hurriedly packed by people forced from their homes. What he had seen would stay with him, he said. It was “the ultimate warning … of where prejudice can lead”.

Starmer did not have to add that the shadow of war now hangs over Europe once again, or that once again dark forces are rising. There has been an apocalyptic enough feel to these past days leading up to Donald Trump’s inauguration, with Joe Biden warning of the US’s descent into oligarchy and a deep air of foreboding hanging over EU capitals. But nonetheless, the moment resonated.

Starmer was visiting Poland to make common cause with the country’s prime minister, Donald Tusk, who recently ousted a rightwing populist government and whose country would be on the frontline of any confrontation with Russia. By way of painful contrast, Liz Truss, Boris Johnson and Nigel Farage were meanwhile preparing to rub shoulders at the inauguration with leading lights of Germany’s far-right Alternative für Deutschland – a pariah in its own political system but apparently not at the White House – and Spain’s far-right Vox party, plus other guests of honour chosen to usher in the era of Trump.

The new order couldn’t “come soon enough”, Truss tweeted from Washington, alongside a picture of herself in a red Maga cap. Farage, meanwhile, settled for a triumphant: “We are so back.” He has a more longstanding friendship with the president than any other British politician – at the weekend, he bragged of having “genuine friends on speed dial”in the new administration – and knows Trump won’t necessarily stick to going through normal diplomatic channels. Last week, Trump aides reportedly met senior Reform UK figures to discuss how they could work together.

US presidents have always sought to promote like-minded leaders, including sometimes over the heads of elected governments. But previously that itch for regime change hasn’t felt like a threat to old friends in Europe. Now, even longstanding allies must watch their backs as money and ideas flow across the Atlantic to rightwing populists seeking actively to destabilise them, mining the same veins of anti-immigrant feeling and economic frustration Trump did.

Talk of the White House plotting to make Farage prime minister by 2029 still sounds wildly overblown for many reasons. Not least because there are powerful downsides for British politicians who get too close to a president still viewed with a hefty dose of suspicion on this side of the Atlantic, and because the president probably doesn’t care enough about British politics to expend that much energy on it. (As Farage discovered when Trump’s incoming counter-terrorism chief said Britain should repatriate the former Islamic State bride Shamima Begum from Syria, it isn’t always easy being his friend, let alone his enemy: there’s no answer to that conundrum that pleases both the president and Reform voters.)

But Reform will try to use Trump’s presidency as a battering ram to break down British norms, arguing that if the US can rip up net-zero plans to get growth or ruthlessly deport foreign-born criminals, why can’t we? Meanwhile, Elon Musk’s weaponising of the grooming gangs scandalshowed how destructive even sporadic missiles lobbed from Trumpworld can be, especially if British politicians are willing to help him identify targets.

Starmer’s first step should be to make clear that there’s nothing patriotic about colluding with foreign interference, and that Trump’s little helpers serve nobody’s interests but their own. But where there are legitimate grievances, those must eventually be confronted.

Last week, at an event convened by the thinktank British Future to discuss lessons learned from losing ignominiously to Trump, the blunt message from former Kamala Harris adviser Frank Sharry to his friends in the Labour party was that ignoring far-right wedge issues simply doesn’t work.

When record numbers of immigrants crossing into the US prompted talk of a border crisis, Sharry said, the Biden administration didn’t “lean in”, it ran away from the argument. Though by last summer it had developed effective answers – a combination of border enforcement, deals with neighbouring countries and undercutting people smugglers by opening more legal visa routes was actively bringing numbers down – it didn’t even defend its own record, fearful of upsetting the liberal end of its electoral coalition.

Sharry, who spent decades working for pro-refugee charities before joining the Harris campaign, had helped craft messages for her that were designed to sound tough but fair, in line with mainstream American views. But months of radio silence, he suggested, had allowed Harris’s opponents to misrepresent her as an extremist favouring completely open borders, even as the rightwing news ecosystem in the US platformed open conspiracy theories about the Democrats supposedly wanting to flood the country with immigrants who could then vote for them.

The lesson, not lost on Downing Street, was that it’s not enough just quietly to do what works: you have to shout about it, even when your own side hates to hear it. Millions now get their sense of what is happening not from the mainstream media but from emotive snippets on social-media platforms already rife with disinformation that are now (thanks a bunch, Mark Zuckerberg) scrapping factchecking. If governments can’t dramatise what they are actually doing, the truth will be lost in the coming hurricane.

Bleak as all this sounds, however, this is no time to abandon hope. Sharry opened his remarks by saying he was delighted to be in a country where democracy still has a future, which both was a joke and wasn’t. There aren’t many cracks of light in the darkness now, but Britain, like Poland, has somehow bucked the odds by turning left just as much of the world seems to be turning right. Whether by luck or judgment, we seem to be at a different stage of the political cycle; still four years to go until the next election, a system that for good or ill makes life hard for small insurgent parties, relatively stable institutions, the capacity to toughen social media regulation, and a national inclination (be honest) towards a quiet life. But first, we’ll have to ride the storm.

[sentientgolfball]

Thinking about Dewdrop and his hair

Dew’s physical appearance, especially his hair, has always been important to him. There has been so little in his unnatural life that he has had control over, but how he looked was always one of them. Even in the Pits when he was chased out of his pack, he continued to take the absolute best care of his hair. It means he is still alive and he still can control something, even when everything else has gone to absolute shit.

The elemental transition took a number on him. Yes it was entirely his choice, but he wasn’t prepared for how going from water to fire would affect his health. And how he proceeded his emotions. Fire is an element of passion and energy. He started to feel everything more. Everything was so intense. Combine that with the horrible bouts of pain he’d experience because of the physical changes and it often led to explosions.

One of these explosions came after taking a long hot bath, trying to soothe the deep ache in his muscles. He just stared and stared at his reflection. He would tell anyone who asked how much better he felt looking at himself, but in that moment all he saw was imperfection. Because he zeroed in on his hair. It got damaged in the ritual. Burnt. A strange yellowish color instead of snow white, like a piece of paper left in the sun. He hated it. His hair was so important him and now it was gross and disgusting. It wasn’t soft anymore, it wasn’t his anymore. It made him sad and angry and without even thinking he cut it all off.

When the fire finally stopped blazing and he saw what he had done he was devastated. He loved his long hair. And now it lay in strands in the sink and on the floor. He went from angry to upset so fast that he didn’t even realize he was sobbing until he started choking on air.

When his hair started to grow back, it came in black. Luckily by this time he was more used to his fire so he was more in control of his emotions. Things were starting to balance out. But that doesn’t mean he liked it. He actually kind of hated it. He loved his lighter hair and seeing himself with black hair just felt wrong.

So when his hair was finally long enough to put up again, he started to bleach it. Things still felt out of place with the Cardinal and Ifrit and Zephyr retiring and all these new ghouls. But he could do this. He could change his hair color and be in control of something.

Even in the present he still bleaches his hair. It’s become a ritual to him. Even if nothing crazy is happening, it still helps him find his center and know that no matter what there will always be something in his life that he can control. Aether and Sunny left the band but he can take care of his hair. Copia is Frater now but he can still take care of his hair. A new Papa will be leading them across the world but he can still take care of his hair.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Ellooo! Can I maybe request THH students aka the competitors of the killing game meeting pokemon Violet/scarlet trainer Y/n because a worm hole brought them in the killing game? Maybe they have some legendaries that help atleast make sure monokuma doesn’t pressure them all so maybe no killing? Maybe Y/n could offer they’re Pokémon as therapy animals and maybe hold “mock” Pokémon battles with the others by like giving them a Pokémon of theyres so they can try out battling! :3 I hope you have a nice January!

Thank you! Hope your January is good to you, too! For reference I'll leave the team vague (except for Mewtwo and Porygon Z for plot reasons), but they still have access to others they've captured in the Paldea/Kitakami/BB regions

I'll just do a few characters to help me ease back into writing the og Danganronpa series (which I haven't written for in like 5 years apparently????????)

............

General

You weren't sure why the wormhole ever opened to begin with.

Maybe there was still some instability within Area Zero despite the time machine being long gone, or perhaps something else decided to open up a pocket in the universe.

But regardless, it dropped you off inside of a school.

Not Naranja/Uva or BB Academy, but a much different school that had an ominous atmosphere hanging over it.

You quickly meet the other students there after being summoned to the gym, discovering that they all woke up here, too.

They didn't know anything about each other---nor did they know anything about Pokémon when one asked about your "Ultimate" (which you soon learn is your talent).

From what they understood, you tamed animals and made them fight other people's animals, which....seemed a little concerning.

But before you could explain any further, Monokuma shows up to announce the killing game.

Immediately, you take it upon yourself to defeat him, so you send out Mewtwo to destroy the bear--who self-destructs in response, but fortunately they're able to put up a psychic shield in time as he reprimands you for attacking the headmaster.

Your Legendary's appearance shocks every student there, realizing that these "animals" of yours actually possess magic and are 100% not of this world.

Whatever any of them believed before was thrown out the window.

Given your unexpected arrival (and the fact you were pretty much untouchable thanks to your team), Monokuma won't be able to enforce the killing game as much as he liked to--although he thinks someone's gonna eventually kill somebody.

While the gate couldn't be breached, you and the other students try to accept living within the school, certain there was another way out.

He still tries handing out the first motive, only for your Porygon-Z to corrupt every video so that nobody felt pressured to kill.

But while everybody was at first wary of you and your powerful Pokémon team, they've grown to trust you, even considering you a leader.

You have no idea how to return to your world, so you might as well stay here and form friendships with these people.

Makoto

He was the first student you met...and the first to make you realize something was incredibly different about this school.

But after you saved everyone in the gym from having to worry about killing, he became more curious about you and your team.

Since nobody knew about Pokémon battling, you decide to pass the time by become a teacher to all who were willing to learn!

Makoto was first in line, of course.

You still had access to your PC, and after getting it hooked up to the computer system (with help from Chihiro), you lend him an Eevee for practice, bringing out one of your fighting 'mons to teach him about type advantages.

"So I just...give them a command, and they'll listen?"

"Yep. That's all! I'll let you try first."

On the sidelines, Monokuma vouched to have the loser get executed--but ofc nobody listens to him.

Makoto genuinely enjoyed the mock battle, as his luck allowed him to land several critical hits on your Pokémon.

Afterwards, you introduce him to a Shiny Eevee, and during your free time, he's surprised to hear about your harrowing tales of shiny hunting.

"Your talent would work pretty well where I come from," you remark. "Because these guys are super rare to find in the wild."

"That's pretty cool. So what's your strategy? Do you camp out for a few days in the wilderness or...?"

"No. I kinda just run around until I find one. But sometimes, I'll be getting chased by some angry Pokémon who don't like me being on their turf...and in my panic, I'll stumble across a shiny."

"Hahaha..I can picture that happening to me with my kind of luck." He chuckles, now unable to get the image of you running from an angry Eevee mob out of his head.

Ishimaru

Despite witnessing your Mewtwo's heroic act in the gym, Taka still sees them as an animal that shouldn't be walking around inside a school, feeling obligated to enforce that rule when he catches you two going to get snacks.

"Excuse me, but pets are NEVER allowed inside the cafeteria!!"

"I thought I already explained that they're not a "pet", Ishimaru." You and Mewtwo stare at the prefect. "At my school, we're allowed to have our Pokémon out as long as they're not a distraction."

"Well...this is a different school in case you haven't noticed! So different rules apply here! Now please put your Mewtwo back in that little contraption-"

"A pokeball?"

"Yes! The poke-ball!"

"....and who are you gonna tell if I don't?" You grin smugly, watching him draw a blank. "Surely not Monokuma, who's been keeping us hostage here, right?"

Taka freezes up, but after remembering that you basically stopped a potential murder from taking place...he relents and stops bothering you about keeping your Pokémon away (though he's still not happy about it).

He was appalled at your suggestion of having "violent" battles in the gym--to which you reassure him nothing's gonna get destroyed, as they're only mock battles.

He watches a few, nervous whenever the Pokémon on either side faint or take heavy damage.

Then one day (post-sauna), he stops by your room and asks if he could try it for himself, admitting that he's been taking notes on the sidelines and wants to be tested.

He was craving new knowledge and decided that if Pokemon was the only "study" available, he'll accept it.

Delighted, you let him train with a Charcadet. You haven't decided what armor to give them yet, but they were still quite strong with their bold nature.

The two immediately get along and battle quite well, although when Taka loses, he feels terrible and tries going over what he could have messed up on.

You remind him that battling was supposed to be fun, but you give him an A+ for having the same passion and vigor as an experienced trainer--which lifts his spirits.

You decide to let him keep Charcadet for the time being, noticing how they've been picking up his attitude, discouraging other Pokemon from causing trouble or mischief within the school.

Mondo

After learning about his Ultimate, you just knew you had to show off a Shiny Cyclizar that you've caught.

But he takes one look at them.....and laughs.

"No way, you're telling me people can ride that wimpy little lizard????"

"...yes. And this "wimp" can actually reach up to speeds 70 MPH. They've been around for longer than you, I, and your precious motorcycle have been alive." You remark, which makes the biker shut up for the moment.

He wishes he could have his motorcycle just to race you and prove himself better, but he takes your word for it after you climb on Cyclizar's back and run a lap around the gym.

If you have a Miraidon, his jealousy would be shot to the maximum because your motorcycle-lizard is not only 100% robot but they can shoot electricity AND fly????

That's so badass it should be illegal.

If you have a Koraidon, he might have a brief confrontation with them after they assume their Apex form, believing he was threatening you.

Luckily, you quickly recalled them before he could even try throwing a punch.

But since battling interested him, you let him practice with that same Shiny Cyclizar...only for him to discover that they won't listen to any of his commands.

You intended to teach him a lesson about respecting Pokémon, since he hasn't apologized for insulting them--but he didn't understand and thought you were lying about the moves you taught them.

But eventually, you get it through his thick skull and he yells out an apology, which Cyclizar seems to accept as they use Scale Shot-

Only for to miss your Pokémon all five times, making him fume as you mention accuracy as another aspect of battling.

Least to say....Mondo is extremely competitive and acted like a sore loser when you, a champion-ranked trainer, beat him.

But he got over it eventually, and you let him keep the Cyclizar, who did forgive him and gladly kept him company.

Aoi

While you were talking about the different Pokémon types, of course the Ultimate Swimmer would be most interested in the water types.

So you let her browse your PC for some time.

Lapras and (surprisingly) Aqua Breed Tauros piqued her curiosity, asking you if she could train with them since you also mentioned having done double-battles.

Funny enough, those two had natures that subverted her expectations: the gentle-looking Lapras was rash and aggressive with their attacks, while the scary-looking Aqua Tauros was so timid they were outcasted from their herd.

Once they come out of the PC and Aoi gets to know them--they're basically her Pokémon forever now. Sorry.

She absolutely LOVES that they can join her in the pool! Even if Lapras can't swim around much, they still enjoy the water.

And Aqua Tauros' body fat allows them to float around without fear of sinking.

If you were to tell her that Lapras' species was nearly hunted to extinction, she'd prob tear up, but you'd then reassure her there's a lot of protection laws and their population has grown in abundance since.

When it comes time for the double battle, you send out some strong electric types of your own, just to see how well she'd do in the face of type disadvantages.

You didn't realize how closely Aoi bonded with Aqua Tauros until you used an attack that was normally a OHKO--only to see them still standing, having "toughened it out".

Turns out that her cheerful mood and encouragement have given the bull the confidence they needed.

Sakura

After watching your battle with Aoi, Sakura steps in and asks if she could see the Pokémon you have available.

You decide to show her the fighting types, and she immediately takes an interest in Urshifu, who you've had since your trip to Galar's Isle of Armor.

They remind her so much of her dojo, and felt inspired when you told her about the journey their previous evolution (Kubfu) went on to help them achieve their current form, whether it's Single or Rapid Strike Style.

The Legendary wants to learn more about her fighting styles--so the pair have a friendly sparring match with each other.

You worried about Urshifu hurting her with their move set, but they fortunately restrain from using anything dark/water/fighting-related powers.

That's a form of self-control you've never seen before in a Pokémon, but you're relieved (and impressed) when Sakura yields with only a few scratches.

Although she vowed to never lose to a human opponent, this doesn't count as Urshifu isn't exactly human.

You then introduce her to the Tyrogue line you've caught in the canyon biome (Tyrogue, Hitmonlee, Hitmontop, and Hitmonchan), and they're collectively awestruck after seeing her rematch Urshifu, wanting to learn her ways.

So she ends up being a teacher to them, and it's quite adorable seeing them all training together in a way that not just strengthens Sakura's own mind and body, but also theirs, too.

She's not too keen on using them to battle, as she sees them as their own individual who should have the choice to battle if they want.

But because you assured her they wanted to, she agrees and uses Urshifu while you sent out Iron Valiant, a fighter from the future--and despite the type disadvantage, she actually won and thoroughly shocked you.

[suzukiblu]

"Congrats, you're an emotionless weapon. Now here's the three other emotionless weapons you need to fall in love with and yes, there's a very LITERAL deadline before we scrap you and start over."

With Thad, Pockets SHOULD be reciprocal by the standard rules of the AU, so I would be FASCINATED by the process of trying to figure out how CRADYL managed to get around that one if it did? Like, what would THAT entail?? Or like, could fiddle with the rules, obvi. But the complicated option sounds more fun to me, haha.

. . . . . . so like on that note it'd be very fucked-up if CRADYL had to program literal AI's to love Thad and THEY'RE who his Pockets actually are, and therefore he knows the only people who've ever given even the SLIGHTEST bit of a damn about him were literally hard-coded and BUILT to do it and have absolutely zero choice in the matter!! Absolutely none!!!!

Makes "hasn't anyone ever felt that way about you?" uhhhhh CERTAINLY A QUESTION.

reading back through "cassie gets a pocket" rn and just thinking about the boys tent. they wake up with nine pockets, six of which come from each other. that's gotta be an Experience

can u IMAGINE Tim Drake's suffering as they all totally fail to sort out whose Bart is his and whose Superboy is his, much less whose CASSIE is his?? HE IS HAVING A CRISIS RIGHT NOW AND HE NEEDS HIS INTEL ORGANIZED FOR IT, DAMMIT. also oh god how is he gonna explain THREE new Pockets of people his dad's never even met showing up at once to him. hOW.

Bart will not be explaining anything to anyone, ofc, Bart will just show up at school with triple Pockets chilling in his hair floof and go about his day while everyone in his grade is just like "man Bart's so COOL, he doesn't care what ANYBODY thinks!" Then Impulse shows up with three new Pockets five minutes later and the exact same kids are like "god he's so lame, what's he even DOING".

And, uh, literally no one cares about Superboy getting Pockets except maybe the Agenda is annoyed that now they have to do a ton of R&D to figure out if they can make holographic Pockets the next time they need Match to pass for him. Or maybe if they just CLONE those other three Young Justice members, the problem will self-correct . . . ?? 🤔🤔🤔

[alexthesillybilly]

showing non objectum people electric dreams is so scary. what if they think edgar is annoying and the antagonist. what if they think it was good that he died

[forestgreenlesbian]

.

[v-whitenoise]

He felt it. The fact that he was returning the gesture he'd made on an impulse. As though that simple touch would be enough to prove that he didn't care about whatever was wrong with him. And the reality was, he didn't care. He didn't care if he was messed up. Obviously something had to have been broken for him to wind up killing 61 people, right? Alex had been quiet and reserved from day one, Vox taking the time to inquire to him on his well being. Getting to know him. They all had their secrets. Even Vox had his secrets. And he wasn't a saint either. He'd brainwashed people for his own benefit and had zero remorse for it. But when he felt him return that kiss, Vox slid his hands up along his back, his palms pressing against it. Flat, so he could bring the other demon close enough that their chests pressed to one another. His kiss becoming more heartfelt as he poured his feelings into where their mouths had connected. He kissed him as though it might be the last time he ever got the chance to do it. And maybe he was a little fearful that this might be his only chance. He was right here after all, within his grasps. For the first time in a very long time. It could hurt him later for it, imprinting this moment into his memory. Their exchange of words just another reason for his heart to ache while his love and resentment fought for dominance over how he felt towards him. If this were to be the only chance he got to feel this though, he wanted to make it count. Offering to him a loving, meaningful kiss as opposed to one based on pure desire or rage.

When he finally pulled back from him, it was slow - if only a little reluctant. He didn't want it to end, but he felt pushing it further might blur the lines of his intent. As badly as he wanted to take it further, he would have some self control for the time being. Although just with the kiss broken, he didn't yet release him from the tight embrace he had pulled him into. The expression on Vox's display had softened for the first time since they had started this discussion. Lacking any frustration or rage for the moment. He looked onto the Radio Demon with nothing but admiration. The way he used to look at him before their fight seven years ago. Before he'd broken his heart a second time. "I belong here in Hell, too. Maybe I didn't kill anyone - but I'm sure I ruined enough lives that I might as well have." He felt like he was trying to convince him that whatever they could have, was okay. In a way, he was. Because now that there was some clarity, there wasn't a reason that they couldn't -- right? It felt like it did seven years ago... question was, would his heart be broken a third time? Why did he keep doing this to himself? Oh right. Because he couldn't help himself. He loved him still so much despite all the bullshit. Despite how badly he had hurt him and the effect that he had on him just by being around. Vox loved him so much that he had become absolutely obsessed with him. Everything he did. That hatred that burned through him, all of it was just because he was angry he couldn't have the only thing he ever wanted. Yet again, here he stood laying his heart on the line for him. Giving him another chance and wanting to offer him a place with him. Love, desperation... obsession. He couldn't stop until he had him. Didn't that mean that something was wrong with him, as well? "Self perseveration? Sure, I do. But the truth of the fact is--I'd turn all of Hell upside down to have this. Don't YOU understand? I built an entire empire just so I could prove something to YOU." His brows furrowed just a little bit. "I did this--all of this, because of you. Because you're everything to me." Love and Obsession. He'd done it out of both.

He was sorry? After all these years... after Vox had laid out all his cards on the table. He was sorry? That seemed just as bitter to him as the fact that he had admitted to reciprocating his feelings. He didn't want an apology, not entirely. While the actions of their past had indeed broken his heart time and again, it hadn't changed the way he felt. As though it were all to in spite of him. Maybe this was some sort of fate linked thing. But was it that they were fated to just keep having this dance? Always caring and loving one another but remaining at arms length. For what? His protection?

"Save it. I don't need an apology. Just as much as I don't need protecting. We're in Hell now. Haha, I mean, just look at everything I've built!" He'd moved his hand from his face to lift it. Gesturing to the blackened out monitors around them.

Vox had built all of this and even his previous life on the back of his own heartbreak. In life, he had a following. A cult that likely could have expanded with his leadership if he hadn't had met his untimely end. Now, here in Hell, he had created an entire entertainment network and practically taken over the media. Everything except for the airwaves. Which had always annoyingly belonged to Alastor. A territory he had been barred from. And by the sounds of it, would continue to be so. Which seemed all the more ironic to him. All the more frustrating. Which part of this wasn't he getting? Stubborn deer. His self-righteousness in feeling like he needed to save and protect Vox, even now was more annoying to him than the fact that they had known each other this whole time without realizing it.

And he didn't feel like dealing with it anymore. Hadn't he waited a lifetime to hear him say that he loved him? "You know what-- fuck this." Vox muttered his gaze shifting back to Alastor.

He moved both hands now to cup on either side of his face. His palms gently pressed to his cheeks while he closed the last few inches of distance between them. Bringing his screen close enough to the other sinner until it was flush against his face. All so he could connect his mouth to his. Despite being seemingly digital on a display of his flat screen of a face, the touch was very solid. Proving that his TV head was, in some ways, organic as the rest of him. Vox's kiss started out soft, gentle, and maybe even a little hesitant. It was the first they had ever shared after all. And while he was desperate to feel this touch and had yearned for it since before his death- he was still gentle. As though it might have the other shy away from him.

Gradually, though, he eased into a touch with a little more confidence. His hands moved from his face, only so he could tug the radio demon closer to himself, tightening the embrace. His heart was left both pounding and aching in his chest. Uncertain how Alastor might respond to this impulsive act. Vox clearly not interested in keeping things where they were now that they had a better understanding of one another. And willing to let go of that grudge he had been holding towards him, if only to be allowed a moment like this. It wasn't protection he wanted - it was him.

[snekdood]

when ppl are like "do u know ppl of x minority that ur still in contact with" as a gotcha ig to say ur not actually as open and progressive as you say you are but bud... i dont talk to anyone from my past, lmao, I dont think thats a fair metric to go by quite frankly

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Do you ever read a post where someone is explaining a pokitical thing and from the way they're saying you know with absolute certainty 1) they got their info from a tumblr post and have never actually followed up on how feasible that information actually is to act upon (they may not even have checked if it was CORRECT, but when they do they have clearly not looked into how easy or hard it may be to follow those instructions with a positive outcome), and 2) you know WHICH tumblr post they're quoting because it is basically a copy/paste of it, and 3) it was YOUR goddamn post and the thing they are saying is entirely counter to the point you were making when you said it to the point that you genuinely wonder if they just like. Memory-holed the entire context once they saw that one itty bitty point.

It's like the motherfuckiny dating apps all over again. I do not want people to love my words if they are not actually willing to do the work of understanding them! Didn't your kindergarten ever make you play Telephone to teach you how heresay falls out????

[britneyshakespeare]

I feel like certain people on Tumblr have really been fighting for backwards progress when it comes to how we talk about mental illness and abuse. I see posts at least several times a week on my dash that seem to have the purpose of implying people with insert-mental-illness and/or insert-symptom are not abusive when they do insert-action-that-makes-people-uncomfortable, often times meaning to promote a more positive image of people with particularly stigmatized conditions, like personality disorders, mood disorders, psychosis, addiction, or neurodivergence. And I really really hate it because these posts almost always have the ultimate purpose of telling people not just "This thing is not inherently abusive," but often it comes across as "You were not abused."

I just find that to be really unhelpful and unintentionally hurtful, and for what? I believe that destigmatizing various mental conditions is a worthy cause, but at the same time this type of rhetoric seems to be so protective of people in whichever stigmatized group they're trying to advocate for, that it comes back around to a sort of respectability politics. Anybody can be an abuser. And someone's means and methods of abusing can very much be influenced by a condition they have. Why wouldn't it be? Their conditions will affect every aspect of their life and their interpersonal relationships. Especially if these issues are going untreated or being insufficiently managed. I don't understand why anyone would want to make it appear as if abusers are mostly neurotypical and mentally well people, or that if they aren't, then their conditions have nothing to do with it and the overlap is merely incidental. What? It makes it so hard for anyone who is a victim to come to terms and identify the dynamics of what they've gone through.

Addicts and mentally ill people don't have to be unproblematic in order to be humanized and accepted. And nobody profits from writing hard and fast rules about how abuse apparently works, drawing clear lines between which behaviors can, and cannot, ever be abuse.

[muntitled]

Better Than Drugs

Pairings: Namgyu x Fem!Reader | Brief!Thanos x Fem!Reader

Summary: Reconnecting with your shitty ex boyfriend in the games.

Warnings: Language, Substance Abuse, Toxic Relationship, Male Manipulation, Coercion, Smut (+18) mdni, High sex, Dub/con, Choking, Exchange of Bodily Fluids, Unprotected Sex, Unedited (we die like soldiers)

A/n: literally no one will read this but I need him and I wrote this for me!

Being treated like a lamb being led to the proverbial slaughter in a death game sucked ass but seeing your ex boyfriend there sucked even more, somehow. From your vantage point perched on your bed tucked away from all the central conflict, you notice them talking about you again.

Call it past bully traum but you knew when people were talking about you and although you couldn't make out what they were saying, a part of you just knew...

Another vote had ended and Namgyu was still staring at you, his head bowed, chewing his fingernails. He was watching you, while you were forced to watch as democracy crumbled around you.

Your brain made you think Namgyu was perhaps berating you in front of his new friend. Bad-mouthing you to absolutely no end, perhaps saying what a lousy, uptight girlfriend you had been in the outside world. How you kept him from his habit. How you tried to force him into rehab countless times.

And so you shrink into yourself, squeezing yourself further into your bed, hugging your knees.

How were you supposed to know the conversation went nothing like how you thought it was going?

"We need to get her on our team," Thanos had said when the voting concluded and they were watching you pick at your roll of tin-foiled kimbap.

"She's already on our team," Namgyu muttered, more quiet than usual as he watched you through the corner of his eye. He didn't feel like eating. He felt like doing drugs. And fucking, maybe, but eating? It never occurred to him.

Without you to remind him to eat, and to actually take care of his bodily health outside of his substance abuse, he really was a mess.

"Oh yeah," Thanos muttered dumbly before turning back to his own food, "Kay, well, I need to sleep with her."

Namgyu didn't even look up from his food, still leaning against the metal beds as he murmured a quiet, "Nope." Popping his lip, extenuating the 'p'

Thanos himself was rallied into silence as Namgyu casually clicked his tongue before adding, "I called dibs on that bro," he steals another glance. You're searching your chest for a piece of cucumber that's fallen out of the kimbap

This unfortunately, zeroes his gaze in on your ample chest, miraculously squeezed into that tracksuit jacket. Now Namgyu was thinking about your tits while Thanos' head whips to the side, his brow lifted.

Namgyu couldn't take his eyes off you since the games began. Watching you during voting time had stirred up all kinds of lost emotions. The easy and almost thoughtless way you had pressed the blue button before tucking your hands in your pockets, never sparing anyone a second glance. He had to adjust the bulge forming in his sweatpant. If it weren't for him you might have continued to go amongst the games as an anonymous spectre, with that cash prize as your only goal.

"I didn't know we were calling dibs!?" Thanos stomped his feet petulantly, "That's not fair, man. Not. Cool."

"That's the point of dibs," Namgyu said, pushing his hair behind his ears as he continued to stare you down. "Who knows how long we'll be here?" As he watched you, he tilted his head downwards, causing a thick shadow to fall over his eyes as he watched you. He leaned against the railings of the metal beds piled up to the ceiling, watching you tuck your hands deeper into the sleeves of your sweater. Really fucking cute.

"B-But Homies don't call dibs on girls!" Thanos whines.

"Yeah," Namgyu nods, "but, I'm gonna need more than magic pills and a homie to get me through the night," He made a ring with his index and thumb finger, pinching his one eye shut as he spied at you through it, "She can help,”

Thanos was quiet, eerily so. Good things never happened when Thanos was quiet,

"Let's go over to her right now then. Since she's stealing my homie-"

That immediately snapped Namgyu out of his lust-filled gaze, promoting his shoulders to straighten as he tried to stop Thanos from taking another step towards you.

"Senorita-" he said in a singsong voice and you rolled your eyes as you saw them approaching. Namgyu walked behind like the shadow he always tried to be, with his hands tucked in his pocket. Your bed is relatively low to the ground and your heart stammered when both their shadows fell over you.

"Don't have any change," your eyes whipped to your ex-boyfriend before narrowing, "Or drugs. Sorry." you mustered a painfully sarcastic smile as you attempted to turn in another direction, hoping they might take the hint.

Thanos' teeth stretched as Namgyu swallowed thickly, watching you in that distinctly predatory way of his as he propped his forearm against the railing of the bed. You hate how both of them make you feel and your eye scans in vain around the premises, hoping someone might save you from the duo.

"Lemme make this quick," Thanos said with his drug addicted hand gestures. "My bro wants you and whatever bro wants-" he taps Namgyu's chest behind you- "Bro gets."

Silence passed with you staring deep into Namgyu's dark, almost sinister black eyes. You admitted that you were still painfully attracted to him. Knowing that he knows your body. He's already seen what hid under your blue tracksuit, it was dizzyingly sobering.

He still seemed so devastatingly sleezy it bordered on attractive, like he didn't care about what anyone really thought of him. It still brought an uncomfortable amount of attraction that you didn't really know what to do with. "No thanks," you said, bending your head to take a bite of the kimbap.

"Cunt." you heard him mumble under his breath. That caused your head whip up to glare at him.

"I'm a cunt because I'd rather not fuck a drug addict?"

"No," Namgyu shrugged, "You're just a cunt."

Your nostrils flared as something diabolical ignited inside you. Up until this point, fear had been the only emotion you allowed yourself to feel. The fear of dying to keep you alive. But right now, you're being plagued with another emotion and it's setting you alight with interest.

Your dating preferences were never orthodox. You knew you could never truly be satisfied with any other timid nice guy, and that's what drew you to him. You hated admitting to it but Namgyu calling you a cunt did more than irritate you, it ignited you.

"I'm not here to make friends,” You marvel now, in the tense darkness, how confident you had been then.

“How about a boyfriend then?” Namgyu asked and Thanos whistled lowly as he mutters a ‘nice bro,’

“How about choking?” You shot back, “I tried the boyfriend thing and he stole all my savings to buy drugs.” Namgyu’s jaw ticked and you can see his fist fold and unfold. Thanos’ commentary continues. ‘Shit boyfriend-’ he says under his breath.

“Don't be a bitch so early in the morning…” Namgyu says finally before turning his head, somewhat distracted, “Or at least I think it's morning. Hyung do you think it's morning-”

Thanos raised his hands, “Morning is what we make it in here, bro.”

“Leave me alone of I'll fucking scream.” you cut through all their useless chatter, letting a tense silence settle between the three of you. Eventually, Thanos reluctantly pulls Namgyu away. Murmuring a quiet ‘just take a hint bro.'

Soon, you were left in your bed but not without one more backwards glance from Namgyu over his shoulder. He wasn't done with you and that thought sat heavily on your shoulders until the robotic voice from unseen speakers made the countdown to lights out.

The very last thing you remembered, before the overhead lights were snuffed out, was his black, almond eyes still watching you from his bed.

The blue 'O' velcroed to your breast burns a hole through your conscience as your eyes flutter open in the middle of the night, really needing to pee. The prize money acts as the only source of gold light illuminating the hall while everyone else remains soundly asleep.

Life in the games was so much more stomachable during the day, but when the lights went out, you were forced to sit with your thoughts. That piggy bank didn't have money inside it, it held bodies, and the ghosts practically filled this room.

Still, you can't help but whisper to yourself, “I really have to pee.” The only thing stopping you from going to the bathroom is the gaze you knew would somehow find you from three beds over. Your ex boyfriend watches you, even when the lights go out.

Paranoia be damned.

Cursing softly, you maneuvered yourself to the ground. Trying to make the least amount of noise possible as you moved through the row of beds.

If you were being followed you'd never know. Everything was too dark but a part of you sighed as you reached the small arched doorway completely unscathed.

Almost unscathed.

Your heart hammers in its cage when you feel his heavy arm settle over your shoulders. Your mouth falls open but Namgyu is already banging on the arched door with a closed fist. You flinch with every loud, metallic hit.

The little window opens to reveal a triangle-masked soldier. He stands there emotionless.

“My girlfriend's on her period- she's bleeding everywhere. We need the bathroom.”

There is silence from the Guard who is clearly unimpressed. Just before the little window is about to slide shut Namgyu kicks at the door, “Hey! I wanna fuck my girl- if you want, we could do it out here?!”

You try to wrench yourself out of his grip, toilet be damned but your heart absolutely sinks to find the pink soldier opening the metal door.

Namgyu only twirls, pumping his fist before pulling you in his arms, biting back a smile.

“Can't believe that worked,” Namgyu says, with a raised eyebrow and a happy little shrug as he drags you across the threshold. The trip to the women's bathroom is relatively short as you writhe and fight in his hands. There's virtually no reason for the pink guard to think any of this was consensual but they kept their stoicism on their face as you reached the girl's bathroom.

“We'll be quick,” Namgyu assures the guard with a tight sort of smile before pushing you into the bathroom, and closing the door after himself.

You trip on your way running into one of the stalls and he watches you, biting his nail.

“This is the girls bathroom, or are you too high to notice?” You hiss absolute venom as he bites his fingernail.

“Nah, I'm sober right now, which means I need something to take the load off.”

“Cool. Use your hand,” you sigh from within the stalls before dropping your pants to pee. It irked you that he was standing there, on the other side… waiting for you.

You make quick work of it all. Wiping, flushing, and making a beeline for the sinks. He lets you wash your hands but before you make it to the door his arms are wrapped around your waist.

“Uh Uh,” he tsks, “No ‘i miss you’ kiss, huh?” He drags you into his arms, kicking and screaming as he swipes your brains from across your panicked face.

“Only competent boyfriends get kisses,” Despite the fuss, the door doesn't open. Those guards have quite literally abandoned you in here to fend for yourself.

“I can make it up to you,” he said, “I miss you really bad, baby,” Namgyu's pushing your back against the sink, stained with that sickening, pastel colour as he lowers his nose into the crook of your neck. You writhe as he breathes you in deeply, before sighing. His erection pressed against your thigh.

“Someone else could walk in here,” you cry, feeling a dampness seep out of you, wetting your underwear. Your body was being traitorous because it was enjoying feeling anything other than fear. It yearned for it.

“Sto-” you attempt to catch your breath as he gropes at your breasts from over your tracksuit. “Stop touching me-” you say despite your legs getting weaker and weaker.

“You don't get to touch me anymore. You lost that privilege when you stopped being my boyfriend.” He was so much taller than you when he stretched his hand across your cheeks, forcing your neck back to make more space for his lips. A moan nearly spills out of you.

His hands are trembling and his tongue swipes out to lick the length of your neck. To your shock and horror, you melt in his grasp.

“You don't mean that-” he whispers against your skin. “No one's gonna fuck you like I do-”

“No one's going to steal my money like you do either-”

His hand flies down to your throat, choking as he says through clenched teeth, “I told you I had a problem-” he squeezes and for the briefest moment, you see stars. “I needed help and you abandoned me, you bitch-”

“I didn't abandon you-” His lips are on yours, silencing you in one messy kiss that him forcing his tongue into your mouth.

“You gonna be good for me, Huh?’ He says, hoarsely, your eyes glare up at him.

“Leave me alone-”

“You know I love it when you try to fight back,” his mouth breathes against your hair, “You trying to get me riled up babe, huh?”

His fingers find the lining of your own sweatpants and your heart stammers as he turns to push your front against the sink. Your hand grips at the cheap plaster and you avoid your own traitorous reflection in the mirror, lest you find not only fear in your eyes, but lust

“You know how bad I've needed this- fuck,” his voice cracks when fumbles his cock out, grinding against your ass with his eyes closed in ecstasy and his mouth hanging open. Your finger curls around the sink as the first moan slips out of you. It had his eyes flying open to look down at you in amusement and awe.

“I knew you weren't a completely stuck-up bitch,” he says, pulling you up by the base of the throat, “I knew you still wanted me.”

“I don't,” you squeak out as he pulls down your pants.

“No- but your body does,” he swipes your underwear to the side.

Your body spasms as he roughly sinks his digits into you once before pulling out.

“You miss me real bad,” he brings your fingers up in front of your face and your heart drops to find the arousal webbing his index and middle.

He continues to swipe your arousal from from your ass to your puffy clit and the need wracks through your entire body, building as you arched your ass backwards against him.

His mouth is by your ear, breathing heavily as he lines his cock up at your entrance, already leaking precum, “I know I gave you hell when we were out there-”

“Hell doesn't begin to cover- FUCK-” he rams his cock into you. Positively brimming with need as his hips stutter against you.

“Y-ou stole my fucking savings for drugs-” you get the sentence out quickly before moaning into the air, as your boyfriend fucks out all the frustration he's been carrying, all the need and the withdrawal.

“And I ate you out as an apology-” He reaches his hand around to clamp down on the base of your throat. Your mouth falls open when he cranes our neck back, his eyes boring into yours. “Don't you miss it baby, don't miss having me inside of you?”

“Y-Your eyes are diluted-” you begin to say, utterly incredulous. “You're high right now!”

His hips thrusts in shallow, quick strokes. “And your pussy's wet, guess we're both fucked.”

Your pussy tightens around him like a long lost friend, it knocks you out how deeply you've craved him. Needing reprieve from all the fear. “You're squeezing around my cock, you fucking slut-” that nearly has you seeing stars. Your body spasms.

“That it…” he whispers, “Don't think I haven't forgotten the way you abandoned me out there… But in here,” your eyes roll to the back of your head, “You dont so much as fucking breathe without my permission.”

Your eyes squeeze shut as his cock hits that particular pillow of nerves inside you, nearly flipping you off the edge.

“Spit on my hand,” he says, an edge to his voice that let you know he was far too close. You forgot how messy things got when you had sex with him. How much of a mess he made of you.

You do it without thinking about it and his eyes widen as he presses that same hand to your clit.

“F-Fuck!” Your eyes are squeezed shut as he reaches around to rub you to your orgasm. His movements only fumble when his hips start stuttering.

“N-Need you to cum for me-” he breathes out. “I’m jittery- baby. I need it- shit-” you slip into your orgasm right in front of him, milking his cock for all its worth. “F-Fuck this is so much better than drugs,” he murmers, eyes rolled back as a drunken smile ghosts over his face. He's in complete and utter euphoria.

Two rough knocks on the door signal the need for your return but Namgyu's cock is still spilling ropes of his cum inside you and you're doing nothing but taking it.

“I hate you,” you breathe out, because it's true. If it weren't for him you wouldn't be here.

His breath is warm against your neck as he says, “I love you too.

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