#lila looks so pissed lmao

[the-spooky-children]

PELO MADE THIS FOR TODAY'S SM 5 PATREON POST

[sarascamander]

My unpopular TUA opinion:

1. I genuinely like Viktor as a character but I have a hard time watching his scene lmao. I root for him in season 1 but I skipped a lot of his scenes with Leonard because their relationship makes me uncomfortable and I really want to stab Leonard in the eyes every time he shows up on screen. In season 2 I found his story low-key boring and in season 3 — it's hard to watch the thing with Harlan. I actually agree with Allison on her feelings for Harlan.

2. Sissy and Viktor's relationship is cute... But I'm not a fan of it. Mainly because of the cheating 😭. I know it's an unhappy marriage and they love each other and the husband is a huge dick but still, the cheating still didn't sit right with me (which is another reason why this particular plot is hard for me to watch). I once watched this drama where the male lead married this villain and sneaked with the female lead behind her back and i felt so bad for the villain even though I hate her gut lmao.

3. Allison's character arc in season 3 is horrible and I hate watching her character digress like that but at the same time I think it is kind of justified in a way. I mean, a girl can only take so much before she pops. But it's kind of frustrating that it's OBVIOUS that the whole siblings tried to give her support. Viktor is obvious, Diego took her out to release tension, Luther always looks out for her, and even when she was arguing with Viktor, Five asked Allison if she's okay when she's the one that dropped the not okay words to Viktor. You can't say that the siblings didn't try to be there with her but she still acted selfishly.

4. This is just a minor thing but the way the Sparrow treated Grace will never stop making me feel angry. Like bro, have some respect that is your MOTHER. Or could have been. It's just heartbreaking to see how Grace ended up in the end because we see in season 1 that she could have feelings and the brellies love her but in this timelimes she's being treated like a servant 😭 AND when Diego saw Grace and look so happy and relieved to see her and then Jayme said he's a creep. SHUT UP HE LOVE HIS MOM OKAY.

5. Am I the only one who kind of ship Human Grace with Reggie in season 2? Low-key ship them and it's kind of weird but I like the potential there? And there's chemistry there.

6. Klaus can be annoying sometimes starting from season 2. I LOVE him but sometimes I want to strangle him lmao.

7. Umbrella Ben will always be an innocent precious little cinnamon roll in my heart, but in the show he can be quite horrible lmao. Possessing Klaus without his consent, preaching Klaus with the "Luther would do the same for you" in S1. Like SHUT UP BEN NO HE WON'T.

8. Lila pissed me off so much in season 2 with her relationship with Diego because why was she angry with him? Girl, he did nothing but give you heart eyes, YOU'RE the one that lied to him, betrayed him, and drugged and kidnapped him. SO WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE HE'S THE ONE THE SCREW UP!? "I even introduced you to my mom" GIRL YOU KIDNAPPED HIM. He didn't have a say in that. Stop tripping. And the things she did with Stan, is honestly not okay, wth Lila? (But they do warm up to me in season 3).

9. The romance in the show is not the greatest tbh. I don't actually ship any of the ships in the show (except for Diego and Lila at the end of S3) because they all kind of happen so fast and I felt like as soon as someone gets a love interest, that will be their first priority, their family be damned. And maybe logically this is true (I never experienced love so who am I to know) but I'm here for the family love so to see that happen pissed me off lmao. I understand their actions with their love interest but at the same time GET A GRIP.

[baenyth]

Bethany's Bizarre Miraculous Reviews: The New York Special

New York! New York! It's a Fuck of a town! The Bronx is up but the Battery's down! I was spooked by it when I went there in the summer of 2017-ound! New York! New York! It isn't a town!

(It's a city.)

(Also I heard Alya and Nino did a big no-no here so I'll keep my eyes out.)

Oooh! Big new Fancy Opening!

Good introduction, silly stuff with Mr. Pigeon, New suits that I'll talk more about in season 5, etc.

Green typically represents jealousy, Chat. It's good to see you trying to befriend Ladybug instead of flirting with her, though.

Also good ego. It's hard to balance your ego from experience.

And of course Marinette harshly simps for Adrien when it's a detriment to her. Do the salters live in backwards land or something? Chat Noir isn't perfect but he has more respect for Ladybug's boundaries. He doesn't sniff Ladybug's pillow, and I doubt he would even if he knew where she lived.

Sock puppetry lmao

Chloe, shouldn't you be happy about going to New York? You wanted to move there with the Karen that birthed you.

Get disrespected lmao

I love through that sock-filled monologue Marinette implied Lila wasn't their friend. Then again, considering my belief that more of the class is sus of Lila than Marinette,

Yes! Marinette's actually letting go! Or at the very least trying to! Forget what I said earlier. Baby steps, baby steps.

I'm assuming Ladybug's taking the Horse Miraculous with her again like with Startrain. Also the Kitty toy alarm's so cuute!

Dramatic irony lmao "Do you see a supervillain in the house?"

I'm also glad we're getting Luka and Kagami content, even if they aren't going on the trip.

Adrien's dad is coming! And I think he's afraid of flying!

Oh god. This relationship is an agony of cringe. Also quit encouraging it, Alya. Even Rose seems to be for Marinette changing seats and she's an utter romantic.

He is afraid of flying.

Sleep cute. I love it. And the ships too.

Oh no. Alya, Nino, don't do it. Marinette and Adrien are better off as friends. Don't do what I think you're going to do.

He doesn't look that much like a pirate. Aren't supervillains supposed to have more swag than this? Maybe he's just a villain.

Oh yeah. The Miraculous isn't the only magic (in an abstract literary sense) in this verse. There's also superheroes. And all the other Zagtoon shows.

Adrien and Marinette are made for eachother in the same way water and cesium is.

They're really trying to tell me Sabrina is bi and into some guy she just met? I could probably believe the bi part, actually, but only if she uses her love language: acts of service pushed to the extreme.

The mischevious

They're really trying to act as if Sabrina isn't approx. as evil as Chloe and pushing this relationship with what looks like a background character?

Hot Dog superhero whose hot dogs empower others. This is objectively the best superhero I've seen.

Fuck it. I'll take this. There's Julerose in this slow dancing scene. Look on the bright side of life.

Doors! Doors! Doors! Doors!

Oh. So it's the teenaged American heroes suggesting that. Oh. Alya's more innocent than thought. She's still into it, though.

Why is Uncanny Valley's superhero design so white? And just looks like that in general? Sparrow's is cool and practical, though.

There's the piracy! I was looking for that!

Why did Techno Pirate only steal her third eye? She's 100% technology! Oh. He just couldn't.

Ladybug, quit distracting Chat Noir. He fully did not expect this.

Oh. Chat Noir had time, he was just anxious or something. Yeah. I get it now. Ladybug has the right to be pissed.

So it was an accidental killing. And she was only corroded, not dusted.

What is with these assholes? Technolyzer or whatever his name was the one that forced Chat Noir to cataclysm Uncanny Valley, and yet they're blaming Ladybug and Chat Noir?

Reused sewer model

No, Chat, she would've been fine no matter what. The Miraculous Big Bang undoes death. It undoes erasure from existence.

This feels forced. Too forced.

...Is that her civilian model? And at least someone's getting consequences for trying to force Adrienette.

This is a joke. That sopping wet cat breakup is a joke. Marinette's unfaithfulness is a joke. The superheroes under liberation are jokes. Why is Miracalyzer or whatever his name is making someone want to take people's freedoms away? Oh right. We got this much Julerose content in an absolute joke of a special. Cursed irony.

Alright, the orchestral reprise of Chat Noir's transformation was pretty cool, I'll admit. He's back!

Miracolonizer? Is that his name?

So was Adrien's dad just listening to stuff in his room this whole time?

And was this trip that short?

And all the VAs were dehydrated at the time due to production fuckery and a constrained schedule?

So that's what that fic was talking about. It was a Julerose fic as well. Marinette was dating Luka and Adrien was dating Kagami at the time of this special. No mention of polyamory. They were making her cheat. This is Luka disrespect. This is Kagami disrespect. Alya, what the fuck? Also the other plot stuff was just My Hero Academia again, and I hate My Hero Academia.

Edit: So apparently Adrien was told he's going to New York right as he was leaving. So it wasn't his fault.

[sunny6677]

AIGHT SOOOOO

Gregor confronting Lila in The Saturated AU!

(Inspired by @mayisgoingnuts )

(Gregor is also meant to be funny so dw lmao)

Skid and Pump see the now dead Moloch, and Pump begins to cry a little. He runs over to Moloch, and starts basically hitting the statue repeatedly while crying about how it's not fair. In this AU, Moloch is actually REPELLED by young life—and being the little shits they are, Skid and Pump were basically following him around just to mess with him or beat him themselves. Skid glares at the Statue, and then over at Gregor silently. Pump begins to scream at Gregor. "ITS NOT FAIR! WHY DID YOU GET HIM BEFORE WE DID?!"

Skid yells out, "WE DID THE STUPID THINGS YOU ASKED! WHY'D YOU STOP US?!"

Gregor doesn't give an exact answer, and just rolls his eyes. "Hmph.. it doesn't matter." While turning around, he smiles to himself and snickers. "It's funny to watch you cry about something so stupid anyway."

This pisses off both of them because they hear it, and while angrily yelling, they begin to run after Gregor who just quickens his pace and forces himself to limp rather rapidly out of the house.

As Gregor leaves, he seems somewhat pleased with himself, but also nervous. And then he notices Lila slowly getting out of her car with Jaune beside her.

Jaunes smiles awkwardly at Lila, but it kind of fades once she notices Gregor completely. And Lila slurs out, "Wh.. what's.. what's zat? What's it doin' out my house..?"

Jaune places a hand on Lila's shoulder, and tries to stop her from going any further while laughing nervously. Skid comes running out of the house while Pump stands in the doorframe, but quickly stops and gains a look of slight horror when he notices his mom. Despite standing completely still, Lila notices him and gets irritated real quick.

"Wh.. hey.. how the hell did YOU get here?"

"..is.. this your son?"

Noticing the tone in Gregors voice, Lila becomes offended quick, practically marches foward while Jaune watches and scoops Skid up in her arms forcibly.

"Yeah—what's it to you, you.. old, piece of.."

"..pfff.. oh, that's rich coming from you. You know—I get that you're a widow and all, but seriously.. you and your son really ARE alike."

"..what's.. that supposed to mean?"

"Do I really have to say it? Woman—you really do have no self awareness, do you? Heh.. for one thing, you arrive to your house clearly drunk and act like I'M the one in the wrong here. You speak to your own son like that—and everybody wonders why he's such a brat when you're probably the one teaching him to be that way. You—"

Gregor begins to walk away, smiling proudly.

"—need a serious reality check."

Lila starts to glare, processing his words, but is so drunk she can't even turn around. Jaune stared at him, her gaze seeming to falter as if she cant really defend Lila from those words—while Aaron stares in confusion. After a while, Pump slowly walks out of the door—timildy. "..uh.. Ms. Lila..? I know you don't really like me, but can you—"

"Hahah—I—"

Jaune scoops Pump up. "I got him! I'll.. I'll take care of this, Lila. Uh.. bye!"

"..yeah. See you later." Lila says flatly, holding onto Skid tighter.

[laurrelise]

okay i’m gonna be honest five has always been my favorite character since the beginning just because i love the concept of an old man stuck in the body of his younger self (because i personally just think it’s really funny) but i also feel like so many people who dislike five just look at the surface level of how he acts instead of seeing the bigger picture.

like he could’ve easily decided to just stop trying to survive in the apocalypse, just to get his own suffering over with, but he toughed it out and frankly put himself through hell because he wanted to eventually find a way to travel back and save his siblings. i have never once seen five as selfish because of the lack of self-consideration when he put his wellbeing in danger over and over and over again to keep his brothers and sister safe.

he risked his own life a ridiculous amount of times with one specific goal: to stop the end of the world and save his family. he clearly never put himself above the ones he cares about. the reason he cares so much about saving each timeline is sheerly because he wants to keep his family safe, and he never saw them as tools, but as victims of an inevitable apocalypse.

five has some serious attitude, sure, but to be fair, he’s a 60 year old man who’s been through shit that none of his family could ever even begin to understand and none of them seem to show him how much they appreciate and care about what he’s done for them. i love the other siblings, seriously, but there was clearly never a point where any of them expressed how truly grateful they are for him and what he’s sacrificed to help them. (also old people in general just tend to usually have more attitude lmao)

also the reason SO many people (including me) absolutely HATE season 4 is because they completely butchered five’s character and everything he stood for. i promise you, with the thing with lila, nobody that truly loves five wanted that. there are some people who like it, sure, and they’re entitled to their opinion, but personally, i think it’s completely contradictory to five’s history to do that shit. so many of us are absolutely PISSED at the writers of season 4 for rushing it and creating drama for no reason. in my eyes, season 4 five doesn’t exist. he’s a victim of terrible writing and doesn’t uphold anything five represented in the previous seasons, and i generally try to block him out of my mind.

you’re absolutely entitled to your own opinion, and if you don’t like five that’s totally fine, but i hope this helps anyways :)

Why do u like five Hargreeves?

No offence to anyone that likes him it's Ur own opinion

BUT

he was always so cruel to his family. The thing with Lila? He only cares ab saving the world and in my opinion he is js so self centered and it seems like he only is using his family as tools to save each timeline.

I don't want to hurt anyones feelings it's js how I feel cuz I feel very much alone on hating five.

Bye bye yall

[itrin]

TUA S3 (spoilers) 

first of all, holy shit????? like holy shit!!! this was by-far the most incredible season, in terms of acting, cgi, characterisation, sound and music, cinematography -- just intense and overwhelming and gripping and I ate it up in less than a day but anyways here are some of my specific thoughts, haphazardly listed and unsolicited:

viktor coming out and how it was handled was A++ like everyone was normal and chill and so readily accepting with some appropriate humour thrown in but also everyone still gave him shit regardless LMAO

like five "proud of u Viktor, ur an idiot though"

Five "pull this shit again and viktor, ill kill u myself" Hargreeves everybody, supportive but threatening

idk how to feel abt five telling viktor he's there for him but also telling him he'll kill him like??? asshole but I love him regardless, no-- because of it

on that note, never deadnaming viktor even in the heat of a brutal argument isn't something to be praised like it is -- it was a relief that no one deadnamed him even though they were furious and hurt ngl but also this is how its supposed to be!! bare minimum!! u dont deadname trans people even if, especially if, ur pissed at them

tua did an outstanding job handling viktor coming out, A+ for that, could not have asked for better

Luther wanting to give viktor mini sandwiches and throw him a brotherhood party!!! good!!

also that flashback of Allison telling viktor she'd love him no matter what juxtaposed with Allison telling viktor they should've left him in the basement: yikes

AND OMFG ALLISON!!! S3 ALLISON HARGREEVES!! ive genuinely never been more sacred for or of a fictional character like her actress, Emmy, was absolutely phenomenal

characters who're "good" and calm and always say/advocate for the "right" thing and are depended on to be, like, the glue of a group -- these characters falling apart in catastrophic ways will always be a fav of mine because thats Allison Hargreaves man she fell apart catastrophically and her hurt came at the expense of everyone

idc what anyone says I love how Allison was characterised this season I love how she was pushed to her breaking point and fucking broke: she lost her daughter in season 1 because she kept rumouring her rather than parenting her, and she didn't rumour in season 2 until she did and she went mad with power (not that I disagree with who that power was used against, yes queen make the racists burn themselves), and in season 3 she really, really fell into the depths of her power and self-destruction. she used it against viktor (good parallel to that season 1 confrontation in the cabin), used her power against Harlan to kill him, used it on herself

the Luther SA scene was fucked up and unnecessary imo and I had to skip it when I realized where it was going but again: holy fucking shit

also Allison trying to use her powers on herself??? to rumour herself to be happy?? yeah that was fucking heartbreaking like shit

again: Emmy's acting was spectacular like all the dark, hard looks, the screaming "shut your mouth," the breaking-down-and-sobbing just everything like I cannot applaud enough

okay Diego and Lila and Stan and the unborn baby was Wow. A Thing. Very Lila and Diego like ngl and Stan rlly did grow on me and then he fucking got obliterated but seeing Diego come to grips with being a father was so good; at first, he pushed Stan away and out of his sight bc he was busy and had other, more important things to worry about but then Stan came to him for affection and hugged him and cried in front of him when Klaus died and just!! it was good!

Lila has a special place in my heart but her idea of lying to Diego about who Stan is to test him as a father but very in-character and wow both of them reassuring each other they'll be good parents was lovely to see

ANOTHER THING THAT WAS LOVELY TO SEE WAS LUTHER AND SLOANE AND THEM FALLING IN LOVE AT THE END OF THE UNIVERSE Luther deserves good things and seeing him basically say "fuck you" to Reginald constantly was great and therapeutic for me as much as it probably was for him

man oh man oh man poor viktor fucccccc like this guy cant catch a break as much as five can; constantly being blamed for ending the world even though the root cause was Reginald and viktor didn't have as much time with his powers as the rest did and its a hugely destructive power too (not always, as seen with Harlan) and its always the factors around viktor that cause the apocalypse -- someone manipulates them, pushes them, until he triggers and loses control and he's shit on for it even though he couldn't control what others did to him?? viktor was using him powers for only a handful of days, significantly less than anyone else, he barely knows what he can do with him or how it affects others yknow

and I dont, cant, even blame Harlan bc he was in the same boat as viktor -- no one to help him figure out how to control his powers, its just reaction after reaction, accidents and no one on the planet would even know how to help him

but it was an interesting choice to give viktor Harlan back, his kid, and take away Allison's kid-

poor five also like not even a seconds rest LMAO and everyone, especially Allison, blames him for all his time traveling mishaps but like?? he was a kid when he first time traveled and he's taken every chance to do what's best for his family and the world, including killing the Board of Directors like this man is flying by the seat of his pants in almost every apocalypse trying to save everyone

KLAUS MY BELOVED IM SO SORRY U HAD TO DIE A HUNDRED TIMES BUT IM SO HAPPY TO SEE HOW MF POWERFUL U ARE!!! immortal?? immortal!! and can dispel spirits as well as summon them!! wow A Mf Man.

Ben was actually v interesting this season bc yeah he's an asshole in the first half but, when it comes down to just 10 people left alive in all of existence, he shows himself as riddled with Daddy Issues, as the name Sparrow being the only thing in his life, as sensitive to rejection ig?? big mad about not being invited to party and also very curious about the "other ben" the umbrella academy is familiar with

Reginald Reginald Reginald; first off, the actor who plays is A+ and I love seeing him on screen. Drugged!Reginald was so sad to see at first, it was so fucking sad to see that, but after finishing the season I can say with my whole chest that drugged!reginald was the best Reginald like Pogo had the right idea. and even I was rooting for Reginald to turn out good and own up to the mistakes of TUA!Reginald and idk if not be a good dad then at least be a good person and encourage the kids and IDK I WANTED HIM TO BE GOOD HERE BC ITS WHAT EVERYONE ELSE DESERVED BUT I WAS DUPED!!! I WAS DUPED AND BLINDED LIKE KLAUS!! im so- and Klaus was so happy and felt loved by him and excited for everyone else to connect with him too and he just turns around and locks him out of the corridor and leaves him to die and Klaus was forced to kill himself

I wonder how Allison felt about both Luther and Klaus dying due to her deal with Reginald (I mean I dont fully blame her for their deaths it was Reginalds fault 100%) but I wonder if she convinced herself that it was "for the greater good" or if it was all gonna ve fixed or worth it later when she got her daughter back

"do u trust me?" BITCH NO????? I actually dont know how Allison could ask viktor that actually maybe cognitive dissonance I mean girl was at sanity's edge but I wonder how much Reginald even told her about the button and the machine?? like how did she know the button would lead to a new universe or smth

the irony of killing Harlan but also using the powers that were boosted by him

now about that ending: im a lil confused but ill take it

its a new universe I think not a reset one bc wouldn't a reset universe let everyone keep their powers?? maybe when Allison pushed the button it got imbued with her desires to not have powers or smth?? did Reginald tinker with the fabric of the universe so humans didn't have powers like these? this alien bitch has a human looking wife?? is she an alien or does she have human skin like Reginald which would mean they've been on earth for a while and when she died Reginald put her on the moon For Some Reason??? what was Luther supposed to her guarding her casket pod on the dark side of the moon from?

did Reginald cause the end of worlds for centuries or do apocalypses follow him too and everywhere he goes, worlds die???

also where the fuck did these "particles" that powered the machine even come from?? what the fuck are these particles?

what does it mean that Five has both arms again?? is he still going to be the founder? has he escaped his fate or??

where is Sloane? give Luther a goddamn break

okay so Allison has her happy ending after everything she pulled, after the relationships she damaged severely and destroyed -- nw what happens? because clearly the umbrella academy isn't done with Reginald and his wife seemingly ruling the world or smth (or at least enjoying very powerful positions, as seen by "Hargreaves" on multiple buildings) so they'll all be pulled together again

(I hope Luther and viktor dont forgive Allison or at least call her out let them cut each other till bones bleed, I say)

let five get a hug?? maybe? a sibling group hug?

[jennrypan]

Adriens advice was good, yall are just piss babies.

I said what I said.

Fight me 💪💪

Fr though, chameleon happened a while ago and Lila clearly isnt that big of a threat, shes just petty and annoying and she loves attention. So what do you do? Dont give it to her and she'll just fade away.

Also "Adrien should've told the class" Marinette tried that and look what happened why would he think any different? Also. Theyre all smart so hed think they can figure it out themselves. Also believing one child wouldnt ruin their futures lmao. Theyre babies, why would that ever affect them yall dramatic af

[honestly-for-what]

Umbrella Academy Episode 1 thots: 💭

Initial Meeting of the squads

Luther, you whore, already thinking with your dick

MOM YEEEEEEEEE

I hate this dancing montage but it is Camp

Omg it’s fake, BRUH *it’s giving Breaking Dawn vibes*

I love Diego sm, baby boy

So….is Allison not gonna use her powers or what?

Lmao, she gleeks at them so they see shit

NOOOOOO NOT THE (ITALIAN??) MANNEQUIN

Whatever is happening w/ Luther & Sloan

Enough

Something about women who have the same dad as you 🤭😏😩

Sparrow Academy

At y’all’s grown age, you still wearing the uniforms lol

I need a full run down of your powers

Justin/Ben 😏 let’s just say I see with eyes, and my eyes like

Marcus is sus, but Ben is EXTRA SUS

OH NO, MASON!

Umbrella Academy

They’re so dumb

“Why did they call him dad? Why doesn’t Ben know us?” Uh..use your context clues, bestie

So, in this scenario, they were never adopted, they’re still in their countries of origin (some of them)… so therefore at least Viktor is still in Russia

Hold up, but why is Allison so quick to assume she still has the life she did? Like girl, idk about all that

Weird Energy Orb

Slay i guess

The way Mom just stared at it lol

Reggie, oh, Reggie

Piss bitch

Rat bastard

Why you keep calling ‘em stinky? Like shut up bruh

He’s so fucking smug and shit, I just wanna beat his geriatric ass 👊

Random dude

Who r u

What r u hiding

Sus as hell

BEES…ok.

Extra Thots

Cmon thru CGI…you look…good ☹️

Lila

SLAY CUNT

NOOOOOO A SON

“whose goddamn white baby is that??” 🤨🤨

[xhanisai]

SALTING AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND

AO3 / FFN

Summary: Introducing!!!!

The! Ultimate! Salt! Fic! Ever! IN ZA WARUDO!

Featuring Dumb Noir getting taught a lesson about boundaries, Perfectnette getting friends and love interest(s), and LILA GETTING HER ASS HANDED BACK! HOW COULD YOU RESIST SUCH A WONDERFUL FIC?

(All in all, a crack fic on salt fics to bring our spirits up~)

Disclaimer - I've actually only read like one sentence of a salt fic and fucked off afterwards so everything I'm basing off in this fic is purely from exaggerated rumours and gossip about the salt corner THEREFORE if anything here looks familiar or if it seems like I'm taking the piss out of a specific story, it's all just one big coincidence. >:D ~(x)~ . . . Of all locations to settle on for the beginning of this amazing, wonderful, fucking fantastic story, it's established on the Eiffel Tower. Cliched but wonderfully ironic for the phenomenal heroes of Paris. On the beams, higher than the naked eye could see, Ladybug and Chat Noir were... Arguing. The feline hero had his partner's wrist clasped in an iron hold, digging those deadly claws ever so slightly into the soft flesh, piercing the supposed indestructible suit with a creepy grin- "Wait- hold up a second. I would never, NEVER hurt My Lady! Not even unintentionally! And what's with that face I'm making!?" Oh SHUT UP Shit Noir! Let me carry on writing my fucking story jeez! Stop breaking out of character and keep following the script! Anyways~ The skinny, pasty assed hero- "This script sucks..."- -TUGGED Ladybug closer to him, grin widening like he won the lottery as his demonic looking eyes perversely drank in the sight of the clearly uncomfortable looking heroine in his grasps. His face leaned into hers, only coming closer as she tried her best to lean back with a grimace. "Just one kiss Bugaboo~ one kiss won't hurt..." His grip tightened on the appendage, making the girl wince painfully. "Come on Chat Noir...let go! I have already told you, I'm in love with someone else. You seriously need to back off!" Ladybug whimpered, tossing away all her badassery and ability to suckerpunch a fuckboy in the face because hell yeah it ain't relevant to this sexy fic- "You're right Chaton, this script does suck lmao"- IGNORING WHAT THE CANON LB JUST SAID. Ehem. Like a defenseless little shoujou manga protagonist, Ladybug felt tears sparkle in her eyes and pure sadness washed over her frail body before Fuck Noir dipped her into a romantic pose and smashed his lips against hers with soooooo much passion and tongue and teeth and- . What. On. Earth. Oi you stupid cat! Watch where you're putting your hands on the girl! Yikes! What do they teach these Europeans!? Break it up already you hormone riddled boobs! "Oh Minou~ You're so daring~" "Just for you, My Lady~" STAY ON SCRIPT YOU BRATS! Hmph! Carrying on. Suddenly, herculean strength riddled through Ladybug's blood, falcon punching Bitch Noir off her and off the tower, thus HenchBug™ was born. Panting and wiping her lip with her thumb in a really really badass way (YOU KNOW THAT EPIC WAY THAT ANIME CHARACTERS DO TO WIPE THE BLOOD OFF THEIR LIP, RIGHT? RIGHT? ex deeeee), MachoBug swept towards Pussy Noir's broken twiggy body at the bottom of the tower. "You disobeyed me for the umpteenth time, Noir." BadassBug uttered cooly, keeping a blind eye to the growing crowd around her and the mangled up flesh on sticks at her feet. The black and yellow mess didn't respond. "Lo-oooool cos I'm dead!" WE'LL PRETEND WE DIDN'T HEAR THAT EITHER. Anger coursed through Ladybug's veins as all those traumatising memories and moments she had with her horrific partner flashed through her brain like an old window's movie maker AMV with Evanescence's 'Bring Me Back To Life' song blasting at full volume. The conveniently arrived Alya at the front of the crowd live streamed everything on the WadyBwog, babbling about ice cream scoops. "Every time we met up, you'd always make unwanted advances to me. You'd always force a kiss on me. You even slapped my thicc™ ass a few times- once to the beat of fucking Nyan cat!" The hive minded crowd surrounding them 'oooed' and 'aaahed', some snapped a selfie with what's left of the black cat. "Therefore," The sun auspiciously shone behind MariBug, giving her an ethereal, angelic look as she carried on her lecture. "I now deem you unworthy of the miraculous." BugBug fluttered her eyelashes with so much pain as if reciting those words killed her whole generation and their dogs and their hamsters. "Hand it over to me or else I'll force it off you." All of a sudden BuffBug™ was back, bitch slapping CryBabyBug away and menacingly placed one foot on the carcass.   "Wow I think she forgot that you're dead Chat Noir," THE HIGH TENSIONED MOMENT REMAINED UNBROKEN AS FAKEBUG- oof- Ladybug rolled her eyes with annoyance at the disgusting boy's silence and immediately knelt down to yank the miraculous off his bony fingers- "Never!" The catboy sprung back to life before anyone could breathe, clutching his hand to guard his ring ferally, froth seeping out of his teeth and fangs gnashing against one another- "Looks like I'm a vampire with rabies now, Bug." "Since when did you have fangs?" "Since two seconds ago-" OH MY GOD YOU TWO! SHUT UP AND LET ME WRITE! Zombie Noir leapt back with a hiss, faux ears and tail twitching with indignation and summoned the ancient destruction power whilst BossBug spun her yoyo around in battle formation, ready to call for her lucky charm anytime soon. Cat and Bug kept up the intense eye contact as that cowboy music from the good, the bad and the fugly played in the background (cheers Lahiffe mah d00d!). "You don't want to become my enemy, do you, Chat N00b?" The heroine spat, bones clicking in place as she stretched her fingers when she and the lad in black circled each other slowly. The crowd and Alya were casually chilling in the background, the latter still narrating about an epic ice cream scoop. "Heh, I won't need to be the enemy if you don't touch MY ring... Milady~"- "MON DIEU! C'EST 'MY LADY'! C'EST N'AI PAS 'MILADY'!" THAT'S THE POINT YOU STUPID CAT! Break out of character one more time and I'll castrate you and feed your teeny tiny *censored* to the dogs! "...My Lady? Is my *censored* small? :(" "If your *censored* was small, you'd never have been able to make me scream at night, Minou~ ;3" ":D" 

Regardless! The pussycat feinted to the left before dodging the razor sharp wire of his Lady's (not) yoyo, whipping out his baton (not the tiny one either) and swiftly used it to vault himself away like the coward he CLEARLY is. "You'll never get me alive, THOT!" Was the last thing that small dick energy minded cuck yowled and fled with his tail between his legs. BigBug let out a yell of rage™ and slammed her fist on the ground, branding the sloppy concrete job with a crater as the shockwaves caused the audience to let out a little 'DAYUMMMMMMMM'. "Lol I thought the geezer was dead hahaah! Yo Ladybuggy, mah homie, you and kitty cat did the shame shame already or nah?" Alya, the lil hoe, leant into the heroine's personal space with a crazed grin. She only received a middle finger from the annoyed Asian. (MMmm Mmmm yEAH YEAh trANSiTION so SEXYYYY) Now, it is conveniently time for Marinette's afternoon classes. The exhausted girl dragged her feet up those weird ass spirally steps that could break ankles JUST by looking at them and made it to her classroom, only to pause at the shouting she was hearing behind the door. "Oh boy, time to unleash the kraken..." Silence Adrien! You're not supposed to have appeared yet! Dumb ass blondes these days smh... "HEY! >:0" With a deep breath, the raven haired girl pushed the door open only to be met with what could be best described as a clusterfuck. Tears welled up in her eyes as the remains of her sketchbook (which looked like it had a trip in a paper shredder) was dumped all over the floor. She snapped her head back up only for her heart to literally shatter when she was met with a furious Alya Motherfuckin' Césaire. "Marinetti DupainGhetti. This. Is. Your. Punishment." Alya's glasses flashed sinisterly as her lips curled up into  d i s g u s t . The rest of the class mirrored a similar look, acting as if poor little Cheng vored everything they loved and cherished. All except two people. That witch BITCH Lie-la smirked secretly as she cowered behind Alya and the wimp, spineless little shitty Dumbdrien whimpered on his desk, pretending that nothing was happening. "P-P-Punishment for wh-what?" Babynette sobbed, clutching her shoulders as if to hug herself and make her look smaller than she is. She darted her eyes towards the model, begging him internally to say something, anything! Alas, Bitchdrien only looked away guiltily, his thin chapped lips sealed shut. Marinette couldn't believe her bad luck. First there was an akuma attack, then she was assaulted by her shitty partner for the millionth time and now this? "Punishment for bullying our lord and saviour, Lila of course! How dare you make such a sweet girl like her suffer!?" Alya roared, using the power of the seven chaos emeralds and twenty dragonballs to go super satan and pinned Sweetienette against the wall with an elbow. Her hair fizzed with animosity and her eyes gleamed in a demonic red colour- "Dieu...you just had to drag my best friend into this too, huh?" "You'd think this writer is sane enough to know that I'd cataclysm anyone that dared to harm Ma Princesse, non?" "The writer? Sane? Good joke."- IGNORING STUPIDNETTE AND BLOODYDRIEN- Alya snarled, bruising our sweet little angel's poor skin with her brute strength whilst the rest of the class watched without a question. The sausage haired wench munched on some greasy ass popcorn as she watched the show whilst Shamedrien became one with the floor, a perfect doormat for us queens to stomp on. "You tripped her all the time when no one was watching, aggravating her shattered kneecaps. You plagerised her designs, ruining what's left of her sensitive self esteem and dammit don't even get me started on all those rumours you attempted to spread about her, smearing her celebrity status! I've never hated anyone more than you, BITCHINETTE!" Alya harrumphed and then shoved Brokenette against the wall again, possibly snapping her spine and stormed back to her new bestie. "Mon Dieu your best friend just murdered you..." "Mon Dieu my best friend just murdered me..." Tosses a knife at the duo to make them shut the fuck up. Everyone else applauded the psycho journalist for putting Poornette in her place, even Stinkdrien cos he can't handle peer pressure- BAM! . . . "HOW DARE YOU HURT MARINETTE DUPAIN CHENG!" A tall, stern looking boy slammed the door open, scooping Deadinette in his arms and blew out steam through his nostrils like a bull. Everyone le gasped as the girl suddenly turned into Alivenette and embraced the stranger like he's her long lost lover (Aiyeeeeeeeeeeee mUH O-T-FUCKING-P! K Y A A  A! EVEN THOUGH WE KNOW JACKSHIT ABOUT HIM). "BELIX BRAGRESTE! You saved me~ Don't hurt my homiesexuals please- they're all brainwashed by the sausage haired girl..." The blackberry haired angel begged, tugging on Belix's sleeves. "I didn't do anything-" Uglydrien was quick to defend himself only to melt back down into a doormat by Belix's dark glare, ripping out what spinal tissue the model had left. "Damn straight you didn't do SHIT." Bragreste swiftly delivered a power-kick against Assgreste, yeeting him to the moon and then turned towards the rest of the f00king class, rolling his sleeves up. "As for you nerds...I'm gonna chop you all up into mincemeat and EAT you all with my spaghetti!-" "I'm here Marinette!!!" Another lad swooped in through the door, hips swaying to the beat as 'Luka Luka Night Fever' plays in the background and then posed! Why it's none other than the obviously best written, best character, best BOY in the world: RUKA COFFEE- sorry, I mean Luka Couffaine! He strummed his guitar a few times, nodding and humming as if he was conversing with the beautiful instrument whilst bokeh dots and pink sparkly glitter floated around him. "Ah~ my guitar said that everyone's being a bitch ass motherfucker to our beautiful designer! Come with my Mari~ Take my hand and I'll take you away from this school!" The lycee student didn't wait for her answer and grabbed the star struck girl oh SO romantically~ "No! She should move schools with me!" Belix Bananagreste snatched Nettie back possessively, just like a cat. It was then that the girl decided that when she managed to snatch the black cat miraculous back from the loser that currently wielded it, she was going to give it to Belix- "Ugh don't fuck with me..." "Shhh. You're supposed to have been yeeted to the moon, Chaton," "Marinette please just throttle the writer already-" AND THEN! SUDDENLY! Erm... Errr... AHA! Suddenly all these people from some furry superhero universe came flooding in through the door, yelling insults and real truths about LIE-LA and protecting my best girl Maribear like a boss! Heroes like Gamien and Dason Bob and that guy and err, the other guy and yeah AND THEN they all began to BEAT UP that BITCH LILA and then- "Oh no she's losing it, Adrien I don't think this will last any longer..." "No kidding!" THEN JAGGED STONE CAME FLYING THROUGH THE WINDOW, JAMMING OUT HIS LATEST SONG ABOUT HOW LILA IS SUCH A LIAR AND EXPOSED EVERY SINGLE THING SHE DID TO BEST GIRL MACHONETTE! THEN ALL THESE OTHER KIDS FROM THE SCRAPPED PV UNIVERSE CAME IN VIA A CONGO LINE AND MARINETTA DECIDED TO GIVE THEM THE OTHER MIRACULOUS COS WHY NOT!? AND THEN CHLOE BECAME MARINETTE'S NEW BFF COS HELL YEAH I LOVE VIBING WITH PEOPLE WHO BULLIED ME AND MY PEERS FOR FOUR YEARS STRAIGHT AHAHAAHAH QUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENS- "Adrien, I'm going to kill her. She needs to stop." "Go on then~" AND THEN! AND FUCKING THEN! SCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!!!!!! . . . [Error 404: The following writer has unfortunately met her demise through unknown means. We apologise for any inconveniences. Please keep scrolling as we clear up the mess. Have a good day.] . . . "Huh...that was anticlimactic...now what?" "You go off snogging my rejected predecessor and the guitar boy? >:(" "As if I'd go for anyone other than my silly kitty!" ":D" . . . ~(x)~ A/N:  I am never EVER writing anything this cursed AGAIN! How can you bash anyone but the villains in this series!? Damn! I can't even say I'm sleep deprived! This is the most fucked up shit I've written and I'm super alert oof!

[notasiren21]

#40 from the prompt list please and thank you!!!

I’m so sorry this took so long!!!

Someone You Loved

Rating: Mature for some themes

Pairing: fuckin’ Lukanette boi

Word count: 4,665

Prompt: (40) “I wasn’t lying when I said that I loved you.”

Description:

Well, Luka sings a song and I pissed @macaknight off with this when I asked her to beta read the start of it. It helps if you listen to the song in the story, Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi. Enjoy lmao

She was around by his side long enough to engrave the little things into his mind.

He knew how it felt to have the soft strands of midnight blues through his fingers as he tangled them in her hair. To have her legs settle on either side of his as he trailed his hand up her small back and waist under her soft cotton shirts. The cheeky grin he grew to love baring up at him when his arms bracketed with her in between he picked her up at home.

How he didn't care for sweets but loved the way blueberry muffins tasted on her tongue and the taste of her mixed with raspberry jelly when it leaked from the corner of her pouty lips.

How the Liberty swayed under his feet against the small currents the wind brought on as they danced in the rain. The feel of his converse bracing both their weights as her drenched skirt blew in harsh waves between them. The first lightning strike reflecting off an anchor necklace he gave her on their first date.

When she kissed his cheek when he started humming absently with frustration as he tried to figure out the melody he wrote. Her small fingers pulling the pencil out of his death grip as she lent her forehead against his to calm him and decipher the jumbled notes he had in his head.

The way her face lit up when he played it back to her.

The way her face fell when she told him she loved him but they couldn't be together.

How her arms stiffly pulled away from his hug and the red of her eyes she showed up with.

How the airy taste of salt from the water didn't compare to the salt of his tears that trailed to his lips as he grounded the palm of his hands to his eyes roughy as sobs racked through his body when he collapsed to the wood of the ship.

The way it left him numb with hurt and he became too compliant with his happenings, too accepting.

Defeated.

Music was harder to hear and enjoy, he couldn't compose anything more than a haunting melody that brought any stranger to tears.

He wasn't sure he even felt the burn to his tongue when he drank his hot coffee as soon as it was handed to him. Or the rough jerk of his shoulder to turn him around as his guitar bounced off his back.

"Hey man, you look worse for wear." Théo, a former classmate of his that now ran the coffee shop, spoke as he eyed him critically. Luka shifted his thick blacks squared rimmed sunglasses up higher to cover his dark circles better. "I'd say it's great to see you, but..."

“Yeah, I’m just tired.” He offered the excuse at the ready, hating how well lying came with sadness.

“Ah, life of a famous rockstar.” Théo teased with a smirk. “No wondering you’re wearing a hat like that backwards to cover your hair and shades for those ‘oh so sexy’ blue eyes of yours.”

“Not famous,” Luka cringed at Théo’s words. “Just well known on the internet I guess.”

“Sorry for overplaying your popular cover videos man.” His old school mate laughed.

"It's fine. What's up?" He forced a smile that came across as genuine despite what he felt.

Théo crossed his arms and made a jerk with his head in the direction of the shop across the street, "New place has been stealing some of our loyal customers." Luka scratched under the brim of his black baseball cap he had on backwards as he followed the movement. "Lunch hour is about to hit and you know much we moved to stop by this part of town for break."

"Yeah, your aunt made good scones." He supplied.

He grunted in response, "Yeah. Well, girls frequent here more from school, and they keep going there," he roughly jerked his chin to the place again, "Just because there's an older guy who takes their order who is attractive, I guess. Or so I'm told."

Luka blinked at the shop before turning to his old friend, "What do you need from me then?"

"Observant as always, Couffaine." He snorted with a shake of his head. "I wanted to see if you -an attractive older guy- would give a small performance just as the girls come."

"What? Why?"

"Are you dense? With your face and body, and that 'sinful voice' of yours the girls cooed about back then and from your YouTube covers, I'm guaranteed to bring in more customers for today."

Luka tossed his half full coffee cup to the trash next to him. His own arms crossing as he wished he was in his cabin instead, laying on his bed while he stared up at the ceiling and trying to not feel the clench of his arm when he smelled Marinette's hibiscus shampoo and berry scented perfume on his pillows.

"I don't know."

His friend clasped onto his shoulder again, "Please man, you can keep 40% of the money you help bring in, I don't care. That shop is a dick and acting like we're not its competition."

“Man, you really don’t have to, I’ll just take a free coffee if you really need this.” Anything seemed better than just wallowing at home at this point, despite the incredible want to do so that swelled within him as he stood on the block he and Ladybug often frequented to patrol. “I mean it.”

Théo smiled, guiding him to a spot that he started clearing out near the cafe’s short fence that caged the outdoor tables and chairs.

“That’s okay, I feel bad to make you work without pay.” He straightened his back that had been bent forwards as he pushed tables, “Consider it repayment for that time you paid for my lunch.”

Luka stopped, “Lunch? When did I-,” he grunted. “Théo, that was four years ago.”

“Well, last Saturday had me thinking about all my debts and regrets when I thought I was gonna die. You came up.”

He flinched at mention of Saturday.

Saturday, the final fight against Hawkmoth who showed up in person with a struggling Mayura and an akumatized sentimonster of Lila. The combination of their powers as well as the wickedness that resided in the girl proving to be a difficult fight for them all when Ladybug and Chat pulled the entire team in.

Including a Chloé Bourgeois who was more than ready to help.

He could’ve sworn he heard Marinette screaming his name in worry when Hawkmoth closed in on him and hit into his side with his cane full force. But that was ridiculous. Because Marinette was Ladybug and Ladybug was Marinette. And Marinette wanted nothing to do with Luka since they had broken up without reason beyond her excuse of not being able to be with him.

He was a bit bitter about the whole ordeal.

Okay, he was more so lovesick and depressed, but his negative energy still stood.

“Yeah,” he flinched again when he heard his voice crack and he thumbed his bracelet -once silver, now a metallic black to hide better, “At least they finally caught Hawkmoth for good.”

“No kidding, now we can just focus on the heroes and the gossip your little girlfriend’s bestie posts.”

A knife. Through his heart. Twisting and gutting.

“Gossip?” He chose the safer option of the sentence, ignoring the onslaught of pitying questions and half-assed supportive promises that correcting Théo would bring.

“Yeah, like how that Ryuuko dragon girl and Chat are definitely dating and that Viperion and Ladybug totally have the hots for one another and the soft looks they give during patrols.”

A chainsaw. Just shredding his heart to pieces.

Luka Couffaine once thought he was a smart kid who made the right decisions.

How wrong he had been.

“Right.” He bit out, gripping the strap of his guitar case and scratching his baseball cap.

Théo shot up and loudly clapped with a whoop, “There we go! Now, I should grab the mic stand from open mic nights and just plug that in and some speakers, then we’ll be good to go.” Maybe Luka should’ve just left. “I’ll get ‘er done in five minutes, tops.”

Luka only nodded, watching as he ran around and set things up, then proudly presented Luka with the lone table he left set up to sit on.

He eyed his skeptically behind his sunglasses before hopping up, testing his weight on the surface before he crossed one ankle across his thigh and took his guitar from Théo who unzipped it for him. Théo pushed the mic stand closer to Luka and adjusted when he peered up at him.

“What do you want me to sing?”

His old friend shrugged with an easy smile, “Anything that comes to mind and draws that big crowd of hungry girls over.” Luka bobbed his head in response and tuned his acoustic guitar as Théo began backing up to inside the store and cheered, “Show off that sinful voice of yours, man! Woo!”

He let out a short chuckle and emptied his mind completely as he shut down, letting his fingers strum a few notes to a song that he began to resonate deeply with.

“I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to save me,” he closed his eyes and mentally chastised himself for being so open with his feelings as they poured out of him through a popular song. “This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy.”

He could see Théo looking at him carefully when he opened before squeezing his eyes shut in pain. He hated that look of pity, but he already started singing this song and he knew he would have to see it through given that the customers at the shop had already turned their attention to him.

“I need somebody to heal

Somebody to know

Somebody to have

Somebody to hold,”

Did he growl at the end of that last line? He wasn’t sure but the audience seemed moved by it and how he didn’t go weak on the verbs. Maybe he could please someone for once by just following with what worked for him.

“It's easy to say

But it's never the same

I guess I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain.”

He thought he saw the familiar flash of black with red accents that everyone knew as Ladybug’s new suit for a second up on the rooftops. The rooftops that she danced with Viperion on and let her laugh rang over the quiet town under the stars. He wasn’t sure if he was just hopelessly imagining her or if she was there, but he felt the pain bite all at once and his voice became wobbly in a way that the crowd seemed touched by. You’re kidding me.

“Now the day bleeds

Into nightfall

And you're not here

To get me through it all

I let my guard down

And then you pulled the rug

I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved.”

Weak. He felt weak and it wasn’t the kind where he felt weak at the knees like when Marinette smiled up at him or her nose scrunched in thought.

He always thought he could be emotionally strong to handle whatever came his way. He was so sure of it.

“I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to turn to,” Guess he was weak for Marinette in every way possible after all, “This all or nothing way of loving got me sleeping without you.

“Now, I need somebody to know

Somebody to heal

Somebody to have

Just to know how it feels

It's easy to say but it's never the same

I guess I kinda liked the way you helped me escape.”

There was no blame to place, he knew that. It didn’t make it better or let him throw his anger at her to get it out, but he couldn’t keep punishing himself either.

He felt his eyes sting, shutting them as one tear slipped through and feeling grateful for both his dark shades and the sun beating down on his face past the patio table umbrella, hiding the evidence of his heartbreak.

“Now the day bleeds

Into nightfall

And you're not here

To get me through it all

I let my guard down,”

Who was he kidding? The heartbreak was the clearest part about him as he let the rough notes chip away at his throat and the growls making his voice artistically raw that he would have to worry about later.

His heart stopped painfully when he remembered the way Marinette’s face flushed all smitten like with a wondering look when Luka growled while singing and shot her winks, knowing how flustered it made her to see her calm and collective boyfriend with a soft and careful voice sounding so tortured for certain songs.

“And then you pulled the rug

I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved.

How that came back to bite him in the ass.

He glanced up to blink away the tears and avoid the view of the large growing audience he couldn’t see from the sun.

He could’ve sworn he saw a flash of black and flecks of red again.

Fingers strummed harder and with more purpose and he let his soft voice fall back as the pain ripped through him and out in his voice.

“And I tend to close my eyes when it hurts sometimes

I fall into your arms

I'll be safe in your sound 'til I come back around.”

Fuck. He missed her. He missed her a fuck ton and wanted to hold her again and hear her whisper his nicknames of “Love”, “baby”, “handsome”, “Vipey”, whatever the hell she wanted to call him.

Even his damn name would be enough to sedate him for a year.

“For now the day bleeds

Into nightfall”

Dancing with her into the beginnings of a bad storm on the deck of the Liberty as they belted Cheap Thrills amist her giggles and his laughs he choked down to keep her beautiful voice going with his.

“And you're not here

To get me through it all”

Being curled up on her living room couch the next day with her cuddled into his side. Both sick with the cold, but unable to wipe the weak grins from their faces as Sabine amusingly disapproved of their actions the night before.

“I let my guard down

And then you pulled the rug”

Their first kiss when she got flustered at their first date and told him she wouldn’t read too much into it despite wanting to, and him effectively shutting her up for the first time ever with the crash of his lips to hers and hands tilting her head up to meet him in reassurance.

“I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved.”

The first time she called him her boyfriend and the pleased giggle she let out when he gave a startled and flustered noise, his snack flying out of the package he ripped open before he blinked and asked her to repeat what she said as a toothy grin broke his shocked face.

“But now the day bleeds

Into nightfall

And you're not here

To get me through it all”

Did a camera just flash at him? Hard to tell with the sun in his eyes and the dark lenses of his shades. He couldn’t find himself to care either.

“I let my guard down

And then you pulled the rug

I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved.”

He tried not to think about the fact that he forced himself to change his phone backgrounds to black, tried not to think if she deleted her phone screens of them napping together or the wallpaper of them dancing in the rain Juleka got of them as Luka dipped her over the edge of the stage they always practiced on.

The complete trust in her eyes and smile always made him melt in that picture. Her hands loosely holding her arms as her head titled back in a deep bellied laugh while he held onto her waist tightly with one arm and had the other behind him, the biggest smile that was only found on his face when Marinette was around.

“I let my guard down

And then you pulled the rug

I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved.”

Luka still fucking loved her more than anything.

His drive, his inspiration, his happiness and safe space. His melody that always rang loudly in his ears.

Now it sounded just as it did when they were younger.

The numbness took over as he looked up, face contorted into a forced happy expression as he dipped his head in gratitude to see the very big crowd that gathered and was clapping with tears in their eyes. He excused himself to find Théo who ignored how exposed the song made his old friend, conversing with him briefly as he counted the amount of customers before Luka left and promised to give him the 40% the next visit he came and a free coffee.

He put up his guitar, tugging the case back over his shoulder as he headed back to the Liberty and tossed the faux leather casing to the bed, tossing his sunglasses to the the bed as well before heading to the deck and off to take a lap to clear his break up riddled mind.

The third block was a close achievement, before he felt the petite body rush into him and the all too familiar wrap of small and strong legs wrap about his waist with a black latex suit arm winding around his neck. He subconsciously fell back into habit as one of his own dropped to hold under her thighs and one around her own waist as black fielded his vision.

He barely got a curse out before the all too telling sound of a spiritually powered string to the famous yo-yo pinned against restraint and shot them upwards, his unmasked face burying itself in the crook of her neck from the force rush of air to his eyes.

His chest tightened to the smell of hibiscus flowers and berries, clutching her tighter for the first time in a long while. Half aware he shifted her higher against him to have her bring them closer.

Well fuck if he wasn’t the most touch starved and needy ex ever.

The familiar sound of a specific metal railing being bounded by the yo-yo was the only warning he got before the touched surface with his feet and she loosened her grip.

He barely heard the words of her detransformation before he could see the flash of pink through black and pulled back from her neck.

Terror shook through him, and his hands and body trembled against her as he couldn’t force himself to look up. Staring intently at the silver anchor necklace he gave her, bounded in a rope of small teal jewels.

Luka couldn’t look at her face, couldn’t look away from the necklace she still wore. He couldn’t let her go or put her down either.

“Breathe love,” her quiet voice spoke, soft and hesitant, breaking Luka as he dropped them to his knees and brought her closer than before.

An audible sob he hadn’t heard since she walked away from him escaped his lips and heaved for air as his chin rested over her head and he looked frantically in front of him. At her balcony, the plants that littered the space and the wood paneling they rested on, the little ladybug statue he bought her as a cute joke.

Seeing none of it through blurry eyes, forcing himself to drop his head to her shoulder as she quaked with tears and ran a soothing hand through his hair.

“I’m so sorry, love.” He couldn’t get words out as he just grounded his face into her. “I thought I was protecting you, I didn’t realize how wrong I was.”

She pulled his face up, ceruleans magnified as his pupils dilated to the sight of her in front of him once again and the tips of his ears flaring just by her touch for the first time in forever. She caught a steam of tears with her thumb, giving him a tight smile.

“My miraculous gave me the intuition that Hawkmoth would make his final move.” She paused for a second, closing her eyes and she breathed deeply. “I thought for sure I would die when he did. Either by his winning, or ours but I would end up a casualty or sacrifice. You guys weren’t even supposed to be there, but Adrien insisted for backup and I just...”

“You left me because you thought you were going to be killed?” Voice gravelly and sore from the coffee shop, he pressed on, fingers twitching at her back. “Why didn’t you tell me? Even if you had to strap me down just to bench me from the fight, you should’ve told me.”

“You’re right,” she rushed. “Absolutely right, and it was pure hell to leave to that day or say what I did. I’ve never been more miserable with my life than I’ve been since we’ve broke up. I hate it, I hate being away from you so much, Luka.”

“Be mine again.”

“What?” She blinked, choking on air.

He squeezed his eyes shut, leaning into her touch when she held his face. “I don’t, I don’t fucking care if I’m being selfish anymore. It’s so hard not to be when it comes to you, Marinette. All these small details engraved to my mind, committed to memory and nothing to do with it.

“I keep leaving hoodies I casually wear on my amp for you to take, I keep putting that soft blanket you’re obsessed with folded on the edge of my bed for you to yank off and curl into as soon as you step into my room.” He forced his eyes not to open as he kept going, following the rhythm she provided and he struggled to find words for. “The minute I wake up, before I even open my eyes to see for the first time of the day, my phone is already in my hand with your contact open and a good morning text at the ready for you. Even good night texts when I reset my alarms. I keep leaving your spot open on my bed in case you visit while I’m asleep. Your favorite part on the couch for you. The last cherry popsicle of the package, and the cookie dough ice cream I bought out of habit are still in the freezer waiting for you to find them.

“I’m fucking broken without you.” He rasped, ceruleans meeting baby blues, “I’m missing you emotionally, figuratively, mentally, physically. How the hell am I supposed to be okay when you’ve become such a big part of me? When you’re my literal other half?”

She nudged his button nose with her small one, “I,” she gave a dark laugh that he felt in his core. “I keep airing out my room whenever my sewing machine leaves behind that electrical smell your nose scrunches at so much.” She giggled when she felt him do it at the mention of the scent. “I let the popcorn cook for half a minute longer to get it a little burnt like how you like. I sleep in your hoodies to leave behind the smell of my perfume and shampoo the way you said you like your hoodies to smell when I give them back. I play with my necklace when I grow nervous and can’t talk to you. I can’t go more than five hours without hovering over your contact name or looking at our pictures.”

He sat back on his knees, letting her adjust herself out of habit and moving her hair away from her face. The smile he gave was tight but reassuring.

“I missed you, doll.”

“I missed you too, Luka.” She paused for a second, “Hey,” she started cautiously.

“Hm,”

“Luka, you know I wasn’t lying when I said that I loved you, right?”

The glint that quickly came to his eyes didn’t waver like his abused voice did, “I kinda figured from all the times you’ve blushed and stuttered. The times you tripped when I caught you off guard with a flirtatious comment or wink. And the times you kissed me like it was the end of the world.”

He looked up to see her set a false murderous glare above him as he ran his thumb over the teal gems in the rope around the anchor of her necklace, a smirk he hadn’t felt making way to his face as one of his naturally slightly pointer canines became visible to express his pure happiness.

“I forgot how much of a jerk you could be,” she huffed, looking away and sniffing.

“I’m sorry, doll.” He made her look at him, eyes still shining with unshed tears as the stared into hers. His grin was pure radiance, “I love you.”

She let him pull her down to a kiss, feeling those soft pouty lips he loved so much back on his again. “I know,” she replied between kisses, causing him to huff and pull away with his own pout. She held alone his jawline, “I’m kidding, kinda. But, I love you too.”

Her giggle when he let out a happy and short hum was pure music to his ears as her melody finally fell back into the correct time signature and key. Even as he parted with a pant and hugged her close, stroking her hair.

“Just, don’t leave me in the dark again.” He started, seeing her phone that fell out of her back pocket light up with a text from Alya.

Alya: So did you kiss and makeup, or not? I have Nino on the edge of his seat.

Alya: no really, he keeps asking and refuses to do ANYTHING until he finds out.

Alya: for fuck’s sake, answer and let me get laid

He hid his smile in her shoulder from the texts and the fact that she never changed her screens from them. Letting him see her cheek smushed up against his chest and her arm lazily thrown around his waist while his held her close.

“Never, not again. I’m not stupid enough to make the same mistake twice like I once was.” He snorted at the reference to her old crush on Adrien years ago. “But we do have something to talk about.”

He pulled back, eyeing her cautiously. “Did I do something?”

“Yes,” his heart fell and he was ready to beg for her forgiveness. “You know how many girls have your picture now? Videos of you singing a song in such a beautifully tortured way with those growls, and the rough notes and the, stop laughing Couffaine!”

“I’m sorry,” he muffled his laughs behind his hand. “I forgot how much fun I had just by talking with you and your small bouts of jealousy.”

“Oh, I’m bad? Says the boy who sang a song that people keep covering for heartbreak.”

“I’m getting paid for doing it.”

“How much?”

“40% of the customers I brought in by drawing a crowd and a coffee on the house,” he let a smile spread across his face. “You know, I might be able to change it. Can I treat you to a free mint hot chocolate, a date as well maybe?”

She considered him for a second.

“With whipped cream,” he added for extra measure to his small sweet’s addict. He dimpled up at her with a scrunch when she kissed his button nose.

“God, I love you, Luka.”

“I love you too,” he kissed her slowly, “Mari, just don’t let me sing like that again, my voice is killing me.”

“Got it, never leave you again.”

“Pretty much.”

“Hey, you look cute with your baseball cap backwards like this.” She winked, pulling his black hat from the balcony floor where it fell off and back on his head.

“I’d respond with a witty comment, but it hurts to talk now.”

She grinned, “Hm, I love you.”

Luka still smiled despite flinching from the rawness of his throat, “I love you.”

[marshmallowprotection]

'Okay, need to wait until Lila starts talking about how Magenta isnt good for her, then tell Unknown about Minji or Bora. Good plan? Good plan.' I nodded to myself, pacing the room a bit. It had been a couple of hours since Unknown had banished us to his room, or quarters as he called it. Fancy words and shit.

'Ahaha, damn imagine knowing how to deal with this lmao.' Shaking me head after that thought and suppressing a self deprecating laugh, I turned to Lila.

"Hey, I need to go check on him and see how bad it is. No one else should come in here in the meantime. Will you be okay for the time being on your own? I'll be back quickly, I promise."

Her response was weak, half-hearted. As one should expect from someone that had been dragged from the streets into the middle of a cult. She was handling it a lot better than Spicy thought she would. After all, she could remember that had she been alone, she would cry until she passed out from exhaustion. It was hard enough to see her struggling this badly. 

But, she had no power in Mint Eye. It had been sheer dumb luck that she had managed to convince Rika of anything, it sort of helped that she literally landed on her face in the garden in front of the woman from seemingly thin air, only to add to this divine right she had in mind. 

“I’ll be back,” she repeated, before trudging off to go and check on Unknown to see if he needed help. He slapped away hands who tried to touch him if he was in the midst of a relapse, and he would often be too angry to reason with. She may have teased him, but she knew he could be dangerous. 

It was easier to laugh and hide. 

“Hey, Unknown?” 

Her keycard went into the door and unlocked it. She wasn’t surprised to find him working again. His eyes seemed sullen and his expression was flat. She had to go and let it slip in the first place, didn’t she? She had been the one to see Lila and he had looked into her given the way she reacted to the woman.

She never thought that she would actually wind up here. She thought that maybe, just one time, she would go to the apartment. But, no, she doubled the length of Unknown’s infatuation.

“You okay?” she asked, again.

No response. 

She approached him with a slow walk, slowly leaning against the desk to see him working hard. His vision was still clouded but he was working, there was no doubt that there was no error in his work. God, this place wasn’t okay. She was quick to ensure that he had water, no doubt knowing he would need it fast and soon.

“I took care of Lila,” she said, carefully. “She’s locked in your room. I didn’t leave a keycard or anything. So, you don’t have to worry about her right now. Are you okay?” 

“You knew she’d be pissed,” he said in that flat tone. “What I don’t know is why you told me that if I took was what mine well in advance, that things would work themselves out.” 

Spicy shivered. 

“They will,” she managed. “I don’t see a streamline, Saeran, I’ve said that before. I see multiple possibilities, I didn’t know—”

“If you want to survive here,” his venom tone sharp. “You’d best figure out how to help me do my job to the satisfaction of the Savior. I get what I want, and you’ll get to be her golden child. You know our goals. Commit to them, and stop being a thorn in my side.” 

[goji-pilled]

White Knight AU - Everyone freaks out

So yes I'm finally making more content for this AU!First of all thanks for the ammount of positive feedback on this???Like I really didn't think people would like this AU haha.This post is about people's reaction to Chat Blanc staying with Marinette!

This AU now has a name which @ellenatyler came up with!Thanks again for the suggestion :D

Tom and Sabine:

-They completly freaked out

-Tom basically threw himself between Marinette and Chat Blanc

-Sabine threatend to beat Blanc up with a broom

-Blanc just watched them with a neutral expression

-Before anyone gets hurt Marinette practically yelled that Chat Blanc is harmless

*cough cough*

-Marinette told them that this whole thing is extremly complex and complicated

-Then Chat Blanc suprisingly says that he just wants to make sure Marinette's safe and that she deserves the best

-He basically told them how much he cares about their daughter and that he would't let her get hurt

-Tom and Sabine are sceptical at first but notice that he's genuine

-He's allowed to stay under one condition:He has to learn how to bake,Tom insisted

-Marinette is already 100% stressed

-Her parents quickly warm up to Blanc

-Matchmaker Tom enters the picture

"He's a real gentleman,sweetie.That's husband material."

"What do you think about the Dupain-Cheng-Blanc bakery?"

Marinette.exe stopped responding

-Basically they already accepted him as their son-in-law (cat-in-law???)

-Blanc smiles around Tom and Sabine,which is rather special

Mr.Damocles:

-Marinette prepared a complicated plan over the weekend to somehow explain Chat Blanc's appearnace

"-and then you,Hey are you even listening?"

No,no he isn't

-Instead he just carries her bridal style into the courtyard so early that pretty much only the teachers are there

-Mr. Damocles is terrifed

-Marinette reasures him that noone needs to worry about Chat Blanc

-"Are you sure he's harmless Ms.Dupain-Cheng?"

-Marinette remembering what Paris looked like in Blanc's timeline but trusting her kitty to keep his promise not to cause unnecessary harm

"Yeah absolutely.And don't worry,Ladybug knows about the situation."

-Mr.Damocles later that day when the first lesson starts makes sure that all students know about Blanc

The Class:

-When Marinette enters the classroom Blanc behind her noone's there

-Then Ms.Bustier enters

-She almost faints

-Thanks to Marinette telling her that it's okay and that Blanc is not here to cause harm

-Caline's 110% nervous for the rest of the day

-At one point a big part of the class enters the room at once

-Everyone's shocked

-Mylene actually does faint,Ivan caught her tho

-Max and Markov are calculating how high the chances are that what they are seeing is a dream

-Nathaniel is actually kind of intressted in Chat Blanc,he sits down and makes doodles of him

-Rose was completely lost and Juleka was amazed

"So.Damn.Cool."

-Alix has absolutely no idea what's going on and at this point she's too afraid to ask

-Marinette's only tells them why Chat Blanc stays by her side

"It's a long story but don't worry,Ladybug knows though."

-They trust Marinette and Ladybug so everyone calms down

-Enter Alya,Nino and Adrien

-They freeze when they see Chat Blanc

-Alya immdeantly tries to get Marinette away from Blanc

-Nino's feelings are a mix of fear and confusion

-Adrien is having a crisis

-Marinette just repeated explaining what's going on

-Chat Blanc notices Adrien and stares at him

-Adrien now is starting to panic

-Blanc stops staring when a Alya start's giving him the 'if you hurt my bestie'-talk

-He just nods

-Nino doesn't what to do and litreally shakes Blanc's hand and introduces himself

-It's super akward

-During that Adrien runs to the bathroom to talk to Palgg (we'll get back to that later on)

-Enter Chloe and Sabrina

"Ugh what's that mangey alley cat doing here?!And did he take a bleachbath?!"

-Enter Marinette defending her kitty's honor

-Marinette doesn't even try to hide the fact she's really pissed right now

-Marinette also doesn't bother to tell Chloe why Chat Blanc's here

-Chloe huffs and takes a seat,Sabrina -like always- is right behind her

-Chat Blanc just drank 10 glasses of 'Respect Marinette'-juice

Respect 100

-He nuzzles the crook of her neck as a thanks

-Marinette may or may not be beet red in that moment

-Alya's jaw just dropped to the floor

-Enter the devi-Uh I mean Lila

-Chat Blanc goes from cuddly cat to 'come one step close and I'll rip you into pieces'

-He litreally hisses at Lila while holding Marinette close

-Lila completly freaks out

hello them crocodile tears

-Alya tries to call Chat out on it-

He couldn't care less

-Enter Marinette defending her kitty's honor 2.0

"He just wants to protect me.He doesn't mean any harm."

-Rose brings up how she thought that Lila would know about Chat Blanc since Ladybug is her best friend,right?

-Lila tries to tell them how Ladybug hadn't told her yet

-She goes to her seat

-Chat Blanc was growling when Lila walked past him and Marinette

-Mari is a little overwhelmed by how protective he is

-Not that she minds,she actually really apprechiates it

-Then Adrien returns and lessons start

-over the day she gets a lot of questions

-Marinette falls asleep almost instantly when they got back home

Adrien:

-He froze when he saw Marinette sitting in the lap of Chat Noir or more like Chat Noir but in white

-He probably startes freaking out like noone else

-Afterall how was this possible?He was Chat Noir so who was that?

-He starts panicing when Chat Blanc stares at him

-When Alya catches Blanc's attention he runs to the bathroom

-When he's there he was asking Plagg about it

-Plagg himself doesn't fully understood what was going on

-But Plagg could tell that Hawkmoth had something to do with this

-He also confirmed that this was indeed another Adrien

-Adrien and Plagg decide to talk to Ladybug as soon as possible

-Then Adrien ran back to class

That it's for now folks.The next thing I might do for this AU may be a 'Ladybug' rewrite since that episode comes after Chat Blanc.Anyway thanks for reading!

P.S.I already posted this once but Tumblr was bugging and I corrected a few things but before I could repost it I fell asleep for a few hours lmao

[my-miraculous-headcanons]

How would Marinette's other rivals react? Chloé? KAGAMI???

Chloé and Lila are two girls I simply cannot see as “rivals,” specifically because it’s abundantly clear that Adrien has absolutely no romantic interest in either of them, and they’re not entirely… romantically interested, either. I can’t tell if Lila even genuinely likes Adrien, and Chloé apparently just asserts herself as his best friend? I literally don’t know what’s going on with Chloé sometimes. Or Lila. I just don’t know what the writers are trying to do with these two.

And… I’m going to be honest with you, the very thought of Kagami at this point puts a bad taste in my mouth, and I don’t want to include her in the Marry That Girl AU. I don’t know why she thinks Adrien is perfect incarnate, or where her infatuation even came from. And as episodes pass, she seems to progressively get worse.

Fanon Kagami (specifically wlw Kagami) is great. I love that Kagami.

[ From this point on, it’s me complaining about the shitty writing they did for Kagami. She had so much potential and I honestly weep for her. ]

[I realised belatedly I didn’t really answer the question. Sorry about that, anon.]

Canon Kagami’s character was fine during Riposte, but the character design and the narrative was pissing me off. She was specifically made to look like a “civilian Ladybug” so she could be Adrien’s love interest, which… ew? They’re already making her the “second choice” just from that alone. That’s a serious disservice to her. But her personality was FINE, back then. She lost with as much grace as someone with a family like hers could, and she was rather friendly with Adrien in the end, and didn’t seem to dislike Marinette at all? In fact, she seemed to tease him subtly and generally looked like she was going to be a very good friend of his.

Then Frozer happened. I don’t know what everyone was thinking when they started saying “Kagami was giving Marinette advice!!!” because no… No, she clearly wasn’t??? That was a straight up insult. Kagami’s not dumb, she knows exactly how her words would be interpreted, and she planned on it. Not to mention, she’s suddenly romantically interested with Adrien out of nowhere, Marinette calls her an “ice queen” which CLEARLY implies some off-screen interaction we were never given, and when Adrien ditched her in the middle of their date, and later said “lmao sorry not interested anymore” she was… okay with that??? What the actual fuck. 

I didn’t even watch Animaestro. I know enough spoilers to know, however, that Marinette legitimately would not fucking do something like that, especially after her decision during Frozer, unless Kagami has done or said something to her. Probably off-screen, like it was previously implied before.

Onichan was just. Horrifying. They practically erased every other aspect of Kagami’s character in order to paint her as a violently jealous girl. I’m FINE with Kagami crying over that picture, at least THAT makes sense. But she had only looked at that picture for a single second before she angrily threw her phone (UM, WHAT??? TEENAGERS AREN’T OUT TO BREAK THEIR DAMN PHONES) and cut a fucking tree in half in a fit of rage.

Like… I get that Kagami’s supposed to have issues. But Riposte told us those issues were going to revolve around her family and her own personal struggle with feeling like she has to be perfect all the time. Riposte told us that Kagami would likely go through a path in the future that would teach her it’s okay to lose, as long as you pick yourself back up and try again. 

What we got instead was her having a plethora of issues all revolving around Adrien. She thinks he’s perfect and therefore the only match for her, she’ll let herself get strung along for him, she’ll brag and put down other girls for him, she’ll throw a violent fit of rage if she so much as even sees him in a close capacity with another girl. I hate this Kagami. 

The writing has done Kagami so dirty and I’m not having it. Every time there’s a new episode with Kagami in it, I’m preparing myself for the worst.

I’m just. so disappointed and tired. I don’t want to deal with the drama anymore.

[trishmishtree]

live-tumbling my reaction to ml season 3 episode 1 (”chameleon”)

Spoilers and salt below

=======

Hearing issues? Really? after she'd gone around charming the entire school and making everyone adore her and obviously having no trouble communicating? I'd buy it more if she had vision issues. I always had to sit in the front of the room in middle school because my eyesight sucked.

Also, whose brilliant idea was it to pair Alya/Nino and Ivan/Mylene together? Does this teacher have no idea how teenagers work?

Oh never mind. Apparently it was Lila's idea to reseat everyone. But why did Ms. Bustier agree to it? Doesn't she have enough to worry about with kids getting akumatized every other day and students not showing up to class because they have to fight crime? Does she really want to deal with the rest of her students being too busy chatting up their friends/SOs to pay attention in class, which is exactly what happens with this kind of seating arrangement?

You know what would make more sense? Putting this episode in season 2. Lila only showed up in the finale, even though they alluded to her being in their class before.

"You have a hearing issue, Lila?" Marinette asks, her voice at a normal volume. "Yes I suffer from tinnitus a constant ringing in my left ear etc. etc." Lila replies, apparently having no trouble hearing Marinette at all. For a "good liar," she's really, really dumb.

Also, they make it sound like everyone already knows about her "hearing issues" except Marinette, even though Lila's apparently been in their class for a while now. Why is the writing for this show so fucking lazy?

Remember during Origins when Alya confronted Chloe, asking her "Hey, who made you queen of the seats?" I feel like that might apply to Marinette right about now.

(This reaction has been mostly salt so far because I hate Lila [as a character, not as a person] and can't understand why she keeps getting shoehorned into the show, and I hate how Marinette acts when she's jealous about Adrien and how her characterization is so inconsistent across episodes.)

Oh for fuck's sake, just akumatize her already. At least then something interesting will finally happen. I'm sick of this status quo that the show seems to be allergic to changing.

I feel like I've talked about this before, but if the akumas aren't customized and can land on just about anyone anytime, why does Hawkmoth wait for someone to get pissed off before making one? Why doesn't he just cast one out every morning and wait for a nibble?

Ooh, cool. First look at the school cafeteria. (Where is it in the school though? It kind of looks like it might be on the top floor...)

Oh, now she has a wrist problem, too?

Has anyone referred her to a psychiatrist yet? You know, for her anger issues and her malingering/factitious disorder?

Okay, this makes even less sense. According to Marinette, Lila has literally only been at their school for a day, and that was during Volpina. So when the fuck did the rest of her class find out about her hearing issues? And how do they still remember it after she spent all of season 2 "traveling the world"?

Alya and Nino have a point that Marinette's being ridiculous. But at the same time, it's really not like them to not believe her and throw out whataboutisms to derail her. It's almost like the show writers have no idea how to write consistent characters, so every character on the show just exists there to throw out dialogue when it's convenient for plot.

(Where's Chloe in all this? I'm still waiting for the catfight that will happen when Lila inevitably trash talks Ladybug in front of Chloe.)

I know the point of this episode is to teach Marinette that it's really not worth it to get down in the mud with Lila (i.e. take the high road/sometimes it's okay to mind your own business if the other person isn't really hurting anybody), but I feel like this is something she should have learned a long time ago. Like, in season 1. Why bother with "character development" that you're just going to throw out the window by the time the next episode rolls around when it's the fucking third season now? That ship sailed a looooong time ago, and all you're accomplishing now is regressing Marinette as a character in order to build her back up to baseline. That's just shitty writing.

Interesting how Lila is baiting Marinette and making her look bad in front of her friends, and then extending her a peace offering.

I have a new theory: Hawkmoth noticed that Ladybug shows up really really fast when the person akumatized is a student at Francois Dupont, particularly when the victim is in the same class as Chloe Bourgeoise. The only 2 people in that class who haven't been akumatized yet are a) his son and b) that fashion designer girl, so he's sending Lila in to try and piss them off to see if he can tease out the identity of Ladybug.

That, or they're making Lila as obnoxious as possible so that fans won't protest when Marinette and Chloe become friends.

"Uhhhh I'm still here if you still need help catching up with schoolwork?" Finally a voice of reason! Adrien already knows that Lila's manipulative, so he just cuts to the chase and offers his friendship and a chance for her to be honest with him. And when she storms off because she can't manipulate him, he feels pity for her but he doesn't bother chasing after her because he's not interested in dealing with her shit.

Well, I guess it's a good thing that neither the akuma nor HM can sense Tikki's presence.

I guess he decided to give up on Marinette. Not a bad idea, really. This is the 3rd time he's failed to akumatize her (twice today and once in Zombizou) now.

But if Lila's angry all the time, and she's been in Paris all along, then why doesn't he just use her as his champion all the time? It's way more convenient that way, plus she's actually willing to help him.

Wait, so Lila's new akumasona is....herself?

Never mind. This is even weirder than her Volpina powers. It's like Princess and the Frog meets reverse-Sleeping Beauty.

And I guess it makes sense that she's using Adrien to go after Marinette.I

I wonder where her corrupted earring went after she transformed into Adrien though.

It is...REALLY weird watching Not-Adrien jump around the rooftops of Paris in his civilian clothes.

LMAO of COURSE Lila goes back to the Eiffel Tower.

(Can we leave her up there again at the end of the episode?)

What is she trying to accomplish here? I thought she'd pretend to be Adrien to mess with Marinette, but it looks more like ADRIEN is the one she's pissed off at, so she's making him look like an asshole to ruin his reputation in Paris. (And how is Gabriel letting her do this? I get that he's a shitty father and doesn't give a fuck about Adrien beyond making sure the kid is alive and breathing, but you'd think he'd be more concerned with the PR nightmare that's starting to brew around his fashion empire's most recognizable model.)

Well, I hope his voice actor is having fun messing around and not acting like the standard mopey and sad Adrien for once.

I'm glad that Ladybug saw through the disguise right away. But where IS the akuma, if Not-Adrien isn't wearing the earring?

What's up with the real Adrien waking up all of a sudden? Was the spell only temporary?

I would make a comment about being annoyed that Chat Noir got taken out again and served as nothing but a meat shield YET AGAIN, but whatever. It's only temporary.

I wonder if Not-Chat Noir's transformation will wear off in 5 minutes after the Cataclysm. Copy Cat had a time limit, but Queen Wasp was able to use her special Miraculous power as many times as she wanted.

I like how Lila hates Ladybug so much that she'd rather chase her down than grab the ring off an unconscious Chat Noir, even though it would only take her two seconds tops.

Aaaand we're back at the Eiffel Tower. Because of course we are. Lila had better get stuck up there again.

Seriously, WHERE IS THAT AKUMA? WHERE DID THE EARRING GO?

Wait, kissing an inanimate object turns Chameleon into that object? Or was that oyster alive? Is the real oyster asleep now? Can oysters kiss, or is she stuck as that oyster forever?

(Why does it have to be a kiss anyway? Did they only do that so they could show Lila kissing Adrien in the episode promo? Why couldn't she have a magic projectile shooting wand or something like Frightningale or Style Queen? That would be way more efficient and she wouldn't have to fight to shove her face close to anyone else.)

(Oh wait, no. Lila was watching from the window when Marinette kissed Adrien at the picnic at the end of Mayura. She must have specifically chosen kisses as Chameleon's special power as payback for that.)

"You sure got that supervillain to clam up." That.........was a terrible pun. I'm sorry I laughed. If you told me that pun in real life, I would refuse to look at you.

Wait, so if she hadn't turned Chameleon into an oyster, then where would the akuma have been??????

Oh, right. Adrien figured it out it was Lila already.

Wait, so what was the shirt for? (Disclaimer, I know nothing about how pearls are harvested. Do they need a towel/cloth to put the oyster on? Fuck if I know)

AHAHAHA, glad to see Nino got his cap back.

......I hope that comment about wanting to be Ladybug's friend is a reference to the end of Volpina, and not to the conversation she had with Marinette in the bathroom.

So she didn't get left on top of the Eiffel Tower again, since they fell off of it. But I guess getting left on a seafood stand under the Eiffel Tower is close enough.

Hey, I know that you (the writers/show creators) have promised an even scarier, more powerful threat than Hawkmoth in the new season. But you do realize that having Lila do the death glare like "oooh i know more than i'm letting on" after Ladybug leaves doesn't make her any more menacing as a villain, right? I'm still not going to take her seriously. She's a shit character, and the only reason she's even relevant is because you need a mean girl character now that Chloe's a good guy. Even though you could just make Chloe revert to being awful again. It's not like you've ever had an issue with writing characters inconsistently and having them lose any growth they had before.

Yay, words of wisdom and a voice of reason from Adrien.

(Now watch Marinette un-learn all of this by the time episode 2 rolls around.)

Again, unless Lila has figured out that Marinette is Ladybug, I don't give a shit about her as a villain. Her "evil" face at the end just looks like she has some kind of facial paralysis issue going on (hey, maybe early-onset Parkinson's can be next on her list of ailments that requre special attention). And "you and I are at war"? Really? Has the person who wrote that line ever interacted with a teenage girl before? Is that really how you think they fight with each other? How do you expect anyone to take that line seriously?

8/10. Overall, not a bad episode at all. I did have to dock a point off for having Lila in it, and another point off for everyone (except Adrien) acting out of character. But the voice acting was fine, and the villain powers were interesting, and the fight scenes were cool, and Ladybug's strategy for ultimately defeating the villain was actually brilliant.

tl;dr "It's like Princess and the Frog meets reverse-Sleeping Beauty."

[delilahmidnight]

Laurel is so sneaky I love it

"Maybe he he has a gambling problem or distrusts banks" lAURELS FACE SSJFGKGK

WE NEED TO PROTECT BONNIE TOO

THATS WHAT WE DO FOR PEOPLE THAT WE LOVE

WE

My babygirl literally cannot believe shes done something right or fixed something or that Annalise is giving her a straight compliment???????? Im fucijg?????????d ying???????? She literally is smiling at her and telling her she did good and that asher clearly loves her??????? Im gonnaf ucki mg killmYSEL F SHE LITERALLY CANNOT BELIEVE IT

Frank is so disgusting I WANT HIM TO DIE

Wes wtf are u doing lmao

Mm annie admits shes proud

sdgfhfjgkgk annalises friend thinking her anniversary party constitutes an emergency and bonnie having to run back and forth to deal with it

Im gonna........actually kill myself ok.....bonnie is so small, she is SO SMOL STANDING THERE IN THE KITCHEN TRYING TO JUST BE NORMAL AND THE WAY SHE SAYS "JUST SAY SOMETHING ASHER" IN THAT TINY SHAKY VOICE, NOT EVEN LOOKIGN AT HIM, LIKE SHE JUST WANTS TO GET IT OVER WITH, BEING LEFT OR REJECTED OR WHATEVERS ABOUT TO HAPPEN

AND TH EN WHEN HE TELLS HER THAT IT WASNT RIGHT OR OK WHAT SAM DID TO HER--HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU THINK SHES HEARD THAT ABOUT WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO HER, THAT IT ACTUALLY BRINGS HER TO TEARS??? THAT AND THE FACT THAT ASHER IS PROTECTING HER IM JUST-- SOMEONE NEEDS TO HUG BONNIE FOR LITERALLY A HUNDRED YEARS

Wait so Michaela actually WAS adopted? I want more of her backstory

And man she really has shit luck in men. Either gay or criminals. Yikes.

Asher STFU UR NOT HOT SHIT YOURE STILL AN ASSHOLE FOR TRAUMATIZING MY KID (annalise as me)

two hurting ppeopl, one trying to comfort the other thru a closed door while sad music plays, will always without fail make me bawl

Connor: "and blablabla, bla blabla bla" shdhfkgk

Laurel being brave and done enough to literally just be like, lets ask my bf if he whacked ur gf

everyones always interrupting and overriding and talking over Bonnie and it pisses me the hell off, especially this trash bag asher

STOP BEING SUCH A SPOILED CUNT ASHER GROW UP AND FIX YA OWN DAMN PROBLEMS

STOP EXPECTING WOMEN TO CLEAN UP YOUR MESSES

flashback to when bonnie was so adorable in pink!!!!

oh ok, so the DA frees prof. Marsden and tells sinclair to leave annie and her people alone, and in return annie gives him a chockblock of evidence on judge millstone

Prof. Marsden looks like someone I know

A black woman and a trans woman sharing and validating their feelings about their dead abusive straight white husbands #loveit

look I know nate just lost his wife but it's not like he was the most devoted husband beofre she died??? I mean he WAS having an affair after all, so he GAVE UP that time with her, how did annalise STEAL IT from them?? And annie is literally trying her best??? Literally if someones not letting you in the most you can do is be there and show that youre waiting if they need you?? Which is what she's doing??

No one's ever gonna love her that way??? No, no ones eveer gonna love YOU that way, yOU ENORMOUS JERK. DONT TALK TO MURDER MOM THAT WAY GO AWAY AND GOOD RIDDANCE

I can't wait until everyone finds out it was frank who killed lila. Cant wait for laurel to dump his murderer ass

I literally dont care about ashers daddy drama AT ALL like honestly if my father was a corrupt racist judge id disown him myself faster than you can say conflict of interest. Its pathetic that a man would put his bigotry and pride over love for his own son

Goddamn bonnie looks so fukcing good kill me

(She is about to get her heart broken so badly by whats in that file)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE KNOOOOOOOWWWWWWSSSS FUCKING FUCKING FUCIKNG FUCK

[elizabethschoices]

Endless Summer, Book 2, Chapter Three: My Thoughts

So we’re watching Diego get carted off by a small group of Watchers. Quinn asks where they’re taking our friend, and Aleister questions where Grace and Raj are. See, he cares enough to remember Raj is also gone. Character development!

All Jake can offer is the sentiment that we need to rescue them all, and we do. But there are tons of them against a small group of us, and everyone knows we’d lose to the Watchers in a heartbeat. We can save him if we all work together. We lose a point with Aleister, but he’s never gonna like us anyway. The same happens with Michelle, and honestly, I don’t even care.

MC gets pissed now, and it’s about fucking time. She says that there’s no guarantee anyone will survive, but if somebody else was in his position, Diego would be the first to try and save them. And I believe he would be. That gains us a point with Craig.

MC tells the group that they’ll be heading into one of the most dangerous situations they’ve been in so far, but she’s got to know that even when all is lost, she can count on her friends to fight until the end, because that’s exactly what Diego would do.

Yay, heart point with Sean! I knew he’d agree with me anyway, but it’s still nice. Everyone is in, some more optimistic than others.

I love Iris. She’s great at backhanded compliments and she doesn’t even have to try. (Also I see everything you’ve done there with the number 12, PB.)

Craig suggests setting up a ‘fast hit’ since the Watchers don’t know we’re back yet and ‘with their pants down,’ and then Michelle brings up the time Craig was literally caught with his pants down the previous quarter at school. Craig and Zahra nerd out some over a game they used to play together, and then Zahra recommends stealth.

Quinn adorably gushes over Craig and Zahra being ‘friends’ and then the two start stammering and being awkward and calling each other’s ideas stupid. Zahra calls him a meathead, he calls her a wannabe punk who steals nail polish from Hot Topic. They’re so in love.

Sean states the obvious, telling us we’ve gotta pick either stealth or ambushing. Zahra and Craig are both neutral towards me, Craig at 35% and Zahra at 34%. I think I’ll just stay out of it.

MC asks what the hell he wants her to do about it, and Sean says everyone looks up to her and that she can’t just let them bicker. But MC doesn’t wanna get in the middle of that and suggests playing it by ear, which I honestly think is the better idea. We’ve gotta catch up to the Watchers and decide then after analyzing the size of the group, the weapons available, and I’m sure Iris would give us a low percentage of actually succeeding.

Apparently a familiar presence enters our mind and someone is here. Who?? Jake inquires the same and then MC tells everyone to get down. Ahh, it’s main Watcher guy with the sabertooth. He heads in the direction of Diego’s entourage and then he stops. He senses us in his mind and vice versa.

Quinn is freaking out because the Watcher is turning around, and MC says she thinks he can read her thoughts. Jake implores us to think about something else so he’ll leave. We’ll focus our mind on fried chicken? Although now that I think about it, Diego might have been the better option. But this one was kinda funny.

We lose a point with Quinn because he’s not leaving, and Jake too. He complains about how he has to ‘do everything’ around there (which is a lie) and throws some beef jerky for the sabertooth to go after. The tiger takes the bait and runs, the Watcher in tow.

Quinn has to brace herself against a tree as she’s stopped feeling any kind of good, the poor baby. She starts to fall, but we’ll run to catch her. We got our point back, at least. She’s paler than usual and breathing shallowly, insisting we go safe Diego and leave her behind because she’ll hold us back. We need to get you to safety.

She says she’ll just hide there until we return. I’d at least want to leave Michelle with her, since she’s hell-bent on us rescuing Diego. Iris informs us that the Hostiles are moving east, quickly. Jake says we gotta go, and Michelle volunteers to stay behind and find something to get Quinn’ electrolytes up. Aleister also wants to stay behind to scout for clues on Grace. Jake suggests having a signal for Aleister if more Watchers come. 

Aileister's signal will be a whistled melody.

He suggests ‘Nocturne’ by Chopin and quietly whistles a sample for us. And then Michelle, as usual, gets shitty. And she wonders why her sorority sisters don’t like her??

The rest of the group takes off into the rainforest, following Diego’s trail. A pair of Watchers round the bend, and Lila asks what to do because MC never picked a plan. If it’s only two, I’d try and take them out. But MC tells everyone to hide.

Can I ask why I lost a heart point with Sean, please? Because that was bullshit.

We lose a point with Estela, who says winging it isn’t a good idea on dangerous rescue missions. Then why didn’t you recommend a plan, bitch? I think winging it is the better idea because following one plan when another may come in handy is something that literally just happened.

Jake pulls out some camo gear from his pack and...

They would totally see me coming??? I am white as hell with bright blonde hair! They will see me! Maybe if I closed the shirt and uncuffed the pants they’d have a harder time.

No thanks.

Craig starts to talk about how he wants to take out the biggest one, but Estela hushes him and everyone turns to look at her. She says we’re being watched.

Lila claims she doesn’t see anyone, and Sean says we’re not going to be able to save Diego is we keep stalling. Keep going to avoid losing Diego.

We gain our heart point with Sean back but lose one with Estela. I really, really don’t care that she is neutral towards me.

We keep going and eventually end up at a canyon. The path leads to a pyramind-like structure, a group of Watchers heading towards said pyramid. MC wants to take a look at the place, but Zahra says we’d need better gear to get past all of the guards

The sound of drumming can be heard as we move on. Watchers are gathered around a bonfire, Diego being brought towards the shaman from before. Furball heads to the trees, pausing and then looking back at us. He’s been pretty quiet lately.

Furball wants us to go over there, but we’re not wearing the camo so we stick out like a sore thumb. I should stay here.

The tall Watcher from earlier leads Diego towards a ruined temple and go inside. Jake says now is the time to strike because it’ll only be one Watcher versus all of us. MC reminds him of all the guards still at the entrance. Then my god damned Sacrifice Play™ man says he’ll provide a distraction.

MC starts to protest, but Craig interrupts and tells Sean to inform the rest of the group about when they passed six hundred and thirty-one yards when they played Kenton State. Craig tells MC that Sean’s got it, but MC is concerned because there are dozens of Watchers. Sean brushes it off because there simply isn’t any time to come up with a new plan.

Maybe a little more than I should.

He promises us that we’ll see him soon, and Craig promises MC the Watchers don’t stand a chance against Sean. But Jake gives his two cents and says that while Sean can dodge a linebacker, it’s a completely different game when it comes to someone wanting to take you out. He’s got experience with lure-and-destroy missions.

Everyone seems surprised.

I’m in love with a dork. <3

MC teases Jake about being a fan of Sean, but Jake says he simply likes to bet on sports. Now it’s time for MC to make her choices.

Jake distracts them. Sean stays with me.

We gain a point with Jake, and Zahra, Craig and Lila all go with him. The army of Watchers start to run after them. Now is our chance to head into the temple, so we do. Diego and the Watcher are standing at an altar at the center of the room, and Estela rushes us to hide behind a pillar, and everyone else follows suit.

The Watcher is speaking English! And he’s apologizing to Diego about the treatment he’s faced, to boot. Diego asks about the importance of the Catalyst Idols.

So PB can have a huge payday, duh.

The Watcher says Uqzhaal (the shaman?) believes they will bring around something called Raan’losti, which will bring about a time of great chains. Diego corrects him, saying the word is ‘change’ and the Watcher slowly sounds the word out. Did Diego teach him English?

I’m starting to ship them lmao

Diego complains about his overgrown hair, so the Watcher braids some of his hair for him.

omg he put his hand on Diego’s shoulder I ship it so hard now

Diego spots something in the wall and pulls out an idol. Then is when Estela recommends we act now before anything else can happen, and MC is in agreement. Estela hurls her spear at the Watcher.

The wooden end smacks him right in the head and knocks him out. Diego shouts out the Watcher’s name, which is Varyyn. MC calls out to Diego, asking if he’s alright. He’s shocked to see us and we gain two points with him. He rushes to hug us, but then asks where everyone else is. She informs him that they’re all okay, and he’s so genuinely happy about it.

He says he hasn’t seen Grace or Raj in months though, but MC assures him they will be found. She apologizes for not being there sooner and honestly I know what question I should ask and I also know what question I’m gonna ask.

Are you and that Watcher... a thing now?

Diego says he’s easy on the eyes, and then makes a joke about MC reading Aladdin and Genie fanfiction. SO HE DODGED THE QUESTION I SEE

He asks where we’ve been the last six months and we tell him about how the portal gun sent us forward in time and we reappeared three days ago. We hear Aleister’s whistle and Diego tells us to go, despite the fact that we fucking came here to save him.

The Watchers will hunt us if he’s gone, but if he isn’t, the Watchers won’t know we were there. He says all they care about are the idols and that’s the reason they came for us.

Whatever happens, we’re in this together.

Estela confirms the sentiment, and Iris agrees too. The shaman comes forward, and I don’t know who exactly he is talking to, but he says they’ve brought the idol and both of the Catalysts to him.

Sean is surprised that they all seem to be able to speak English and the shaman goes to Diego for the idol. Diego tells him he’s got to promise to not hurt his friends, and the shaman says he wouldn’t because we’re all the key to their people’s future.

MC senses another presence as Diego offers up the idol to the shaman, and suddenly a ceremonial brazier hits the floor and flames start to go up the wall. A figure leaps towards Diego from the shadows.

It’s Rourke!

Honestly, he’s hot. I sure love me some RDJ.

The Watchers are protective of Diego, clearly, as they brandish their weapons due to Rourke holding a knife up to Diego’s throat. Varyyn wakes up and demands Rourke release Diego. Rourke says he will, but the Watchers need to get out of his way first. Varyyn makes it happen, but Estela is not willing to let him go. Rourke asks the Watchers to put their weapons away, and Varyyn again makes it happen.

The shaman says that Rourke, who I am assuming is what he referred to as The Hydra, can’t leave with the idol.  The fire is spreading rapidly and starting to fall apart. Varyyn tells Rourke he’s got what he wants, so he needs to release Diego.

Rourke says he’ll be taking what belongs to him and I guess takes control over Iris again.

MC edges toward Rourke, Iris finishes activating Rourke’s code, and Estela gets ready to launch her spear at Rourke’s head. But Iris interenes, shining a bright light in her eyes so she can’t throw it accurately and kill Rourke. It lands a few inches above his head as a result. He teases her about missing and assures her there will probably be another chance. I wonder how they know each other?

Rourke leaves with Iris, but Sean shouts for her to stop. She looks to MC and says she’s got to go now, but she seems sad about it.

Iris, you’ve got to fight back!

We gain a point with her and she says that the action is logical, but she can’t override Directive 1908. Varyyn hurls a bola at Rourke and Diego drops the idol, which Rourke dives for, subsequently releasing Diego.

We get it just before Rourke does, and he says we’ll regret doing it. I hope I don’t regret spending 12 diamonds. We reach out to hand the idol to Diego because apparently MC wants to square off with Rourke.

When he touches the idol, we’re suddenly back in the Observatory. Varyyn is lying on a lab table, limbs pinned down by mechanical restraints, Diego typing frantically. Iris appears to be the reason Diego can’t accomplish his task. She initiates a defense sequence and tells him to leave.

Diego says he’s got to get Varyyn out, but Iris won’t let him and gives him a final warning. Diego begs her to listen and asks if she’ll shoot him down just like Aleister, but she claims Aleister will be brought back to life once the procedure is complete. Varyyn tells Diego to go and live his life, but Diego can’t without people to care about. Iris deploys the weapons and bullets rain down on Diego and Varyyn.

We’re back in reality and Rourke is glaring at MC before he and Iris leave the temple. MC starts to run after them and Sean tells her to wait, but then there’s a groan from high above. Rubble and burning timber crash down and trap us in the inferno. Varynn saves us from the debris, but fire is blocking our exit.

Estela shouts that we have no way out, but Furball starts to do a thing.

He quickly douses the flames and the group rushes outside. The temple collapses as soon as we get out. We spot the rest of the group, hands bound, with Watchers leading them down the steps, Iris and Rourke completely out of sight.

The shaman holds up the recovered idol. I think Diego is who he is calling Canis, and then he says that The Twelve have come to fulfil their destiny and then the chapter ends.

Until next time!