#liked how enemies were expanded into variants

[b0tster]

beat silent hill 2 remake. p good

[shams-of-the-wild]

Late to the news but yeeeeeesssss, new Masterworks book!!!

Unfortunately this does mean that the TotK horror/self indulgent rehaul fic that I started planning quite literally 8 days ago, is not going to be started (as in start writing, I'll keep working on planning) until the book is out (and translated).

Because there are parts of TotK that I desperately want to see the concept art or developmental lore was like before added to the game and that will definitely affect some of the content I'll be exploring in the fic (The tunnels below Hyrule Castle and Gloom hands concept art like the creepy concept guardians, pleeease!)

I might post some of the current planning such as all the new enemies I'll be adding to the rehaul fic (Original enemies, new variants of existing monsters, adding monsters/bosses from previous games, new combined enemies like battle Talus, and all respective drops), or all the new dungeons (what they look like, the quest to get in, enemies and puzzles inside, available loot, etc.), New settlements, expanded settlements, new armour (were is our Zonai Survey Team outfit? Or a full Cece mushroom outfit?), new weapons and returning weapons that weren't added to TotK (can you imagine how fun a dazzling bomb arrow would be? Or a Naydra horn flame greatsword?), new non enemy creatures/items/loot.

Anyway, I've got some LU fics I can get started on in the meantime instead!

[falmerbrook]

What I think ESO does incredibly well is give lore to races that desperately needed it.

There's a settlement of Kothringi which both showcases some of their traditions as well as showing how and why the race went extinct (and how this settlement survived).

There's a base-game zone as well as entire zone DLC that explore the depths of argonian lore beyond "idk Hist"

There's a zone DLC that gives a LOT of personality to Reachmen, as well as exploring their traditions, culture and religion, portraying them as actual people and not just an enemy type. And also showcases actual Reachmen and not just Forsworn - two separate things that many compress into one. Yeah, Forsworn are Reachmen, but not all Reachmen are Forsworn.

It expands on khajiiti lore, as well as actually showing multiple different variants of khajiit in game (no ohmes, though, kinda disappointing). Would be surprising if it didn't, with two whole DLCs dedicated to Elsweyr x)

It also expands on Bosmer lore quite a lot, but not as much as I would've liked, but anyway.

It does a lot for Sea Sloads, and I mean a lot - especially considering that before that they existed as a single line of text and nothing more.

It adds maormer and gives some of them some complexity through quests, which is also very nice to see.

It even shows us visions of ayleids as if they were alive, giving us the sense of their skin and eye color (surprisingly enough, they aren't just adding altmers instead of ayleids and calling it a day, they're actually somewhat different).

Anyway, lore

Unfortunately I haven't gotten to much of it yet (I've only done the main quest and DC content so far. I just started AD before taking my break), but I do appreciate this about the game too, even if I'm not a fan of what they did decide to add/develop. I think that's one of eso's strongest attributes, that it let's us explore more of Tamriel without having to wait for full blown games.

I hope you're right about the Reachmen thing btw, because the base game did quite frankly badly with them (from what I've seen)

[scarlet--wiccan]

Does Pietro have any notable villains for him particularly? I feel like he’s more involved with both mutants and inhumans so he kind of has a wider general pool, but I can’t think of anyone specifically, especially not with a more unique relationship to him than any other character. The best Lore equivalent I can think of is Luminous, but, she’s as much Wanda’s as his (though I am kind of picturing a SW issue where the twins and Lorna team up against Luminous, Lore, and Zaladane)

I feel like he arguably has the most antagonistic relationship with Magneto of Mag’s kids (bio or otherwise) which is something, I guess?

He definitely has the most consistantly antagonistic relationship with Magneto, although I'd argue that Lorna comes the closest to having an actually toxic parent-child relationship, but I'd have re-read a lot of X-Men material to defend that argument, so that's a conversation for another day.

He's got a few special enemies-- Maximus Boltagon put a psychic whammy on Pietro that turned him crazy and evil for a while in the 80s. Exodus and the Acolytes targeted Pietro and endangered Luna a few times in the 90s, and like I said, Modred and Chthon came after him when Wanda was missing in the early 2010s.

Anyways, Pietro's equivalent to Lore is actually this weird dude named Nestor.

Quicksilver (1997) #13

Nestor is a mysterious. older version of Pietro from an alternate/potential future timeline, who emotionally and psychologically torments Pietro throughout the Quicksilver solo series. His main goal is to push Pietro to achieve the full potential of his powers and follow the necessary path to maintain Nestor's timeline. So, he's not a totally evil world-destroyer like Lore, but he is a very creepy, sinister variant of Pietro from a presumably dark timeline.

Nestor urges Pietro to forgo his relationships, particularly with Crystal and Luna, and really lean into the violence and rage that Pietro believes he inherited from Magneto. Fortunately, Pietro ultimately defies his influence. This story is really interesting in contrast to Quicksilver: No Surrender, where Pietro actually expands his powers and defeats his sinister doppelgangers by slowing down, practicing mindfulness, and grounding himself with love and acceptance instead of rage.

In addition to Pietro's super speed, Nestor appears to possess some degree of Magneto's power (yet another thing that makes no sense after the retcon) as well as time-travel abilities. It's not clear if his time powers are connected to his speed or not, but several years later, Pietro's powers were artificially expanded to include time travel when he was dosing himself with Terrigen mist during Son of M. It's kind of a parallel to how Wanda accesses reality-bending powers through external augmentation, but it usually causes her to become evil or "go crazy," as is unfortunately common in superhero comics.

[ghostfruits]

Is there anywhere I can get like, full color comics of the ENEMY series? I love them and I love the colors but I remember back when enemy 001 was first released it was just black and white (totally understandable, also someone threw in a sketch with it on a chunk of cardboard and it was so sick) and was just wondering if you had found like a publisher or something.

this is a sumwht layered answer

those was phntm red & blu im pretty sure, me & mikah made them at like, staples, with like, zero planning, when mikah came 2 my house we did not even plan on doing any gf shit we was just regular kicking it and then we ended up doin it anyway. they was black and white bc we did 1 in color and realized very quickly it would just straight overdraw my acct to make like more than 8 of them so we compensated for tht fact by making like 100 additional things tht went inside of them, including like, tht cardboard chunk, and probably some yugiohs we vandalized. there was one where itwas like a guy holding 2 swords and mikah wrote "damn i got both" on it

2nd ring

enemy 1-4 is all physical & they have been sold out for a grip. i have like, Some, we went thru like a lot of them doin convention shit and store shit and whatever. i have been like waiting to determine wht th interest in like a reprint of them would be like & we wanted to do a bunch of like weird shit to them i wanted to do a variant thing for 001 at minimum w francines ghost on it insteads

3rd ring

i kinda wanna make

a fourth phntm

we wrote a bunch of phntm adjacent stuff or like stuff tht woulda required sum1 to have read any of those to like fuck with it but also enemy wasz inherently a kinda soft reset for us and iunno how many niggas ever touch any of tht shit or like remember it if they did. i dunno how many niggas even fw hammerdog like tht now and tht used to be our fuckin. megahit. tht was our lose urself for a grip and now its like prolly girbaud or slime miner or sum typea sumn. weve remade or expanded a bunch of stuff for enemy & i wanna glue all th phntms together and do sum like 140 pg freakshow nebula ultra thing with like 6 new ones at th back end of it. i wanna do dogmisers 2

u can tell im not lying when i promise nebula gon circle back cuz we suck our own dick this crazy behind a 3 issue run prolly a hundred niggas total ever read

i answered ur question but it probably wasnt helpful in the way u were hoping for

[val-of-the-north]

Hemwick and the Hintertombs: An observation/headcanon

Hello guys, here’s something I noticed that I thought was pretty cool! The Bloodborne Wiki helped a lot with this observation, so I’ll be posting screenshots from it. Check it out here -> [x]

The Eye Collectors are very rare enemies in Bloodborne, appearing only in Yahar’gul (during the Evening) and the Hunter’s Nightmare. However, many have correctly pointed out that they are identical to the two Witches of Hemwick that we fight as an optional boss, only, they are not covered head to toes in eyes and don’t hold a strange cluster of eyes in one of their hands. Maybe, that’s why they are still just collectors and not witches?

Either way, it’s clear from their locations that these hags and the countryside of Hemwick itself have a deep connection with all that is dead and cursed... but how deep does this connection goes?

The Eye Collectors are also found in two other places: the preset Hintertomb Chalices. The Hintertombs are a place of death and stagnation, endless ever-growing graveyards where filth and dregs deposit. These women are attracted to what lurks there for its usefulness in rituals. For example, we can find several Bloodshot Eyeballs down there, as well as Inflicted Organs.

But it’s not over yet. Bloodshot Eyeballs are actually NEEDED to access the Hintertombs, its the primary ingredient in fact! And it’s exactly what the Witches of Hemwick drop upon defeat.

It seems like Hemwick and the Hintertombs are more connected than one would first realize... but it’s not surprising. Hemwick too is turning into a massive ever-expanding graveyard. I doubt the place was called “Charnel Lane” before the plague ravaged the adjacent city of Yharnam. Perhaps then, it’s all just a thematic connection? Maybe, but maybe there’s more to it than that.

The specialty of Hemwick, the Bone Marrow Ash, is found in great quantities in the Hintertombs. How strange that something the Charnel Lane is known for would to be this plentiful underground. (Retranslation on the right by Last Protagonist, found here ->[x])

Perhaps then, this is nothing but a long-standing tradition originated from the Pthumerians who reside here, the Hintertomb Tribe, as I like to call them. It wouldn’t be too out of the ordinary for the people of Hemwick to have descended from them somehow. After all, we know the blood of Pthumerian royalty survived at least in part within the Cainhurst nobles. Perhaps the common folk of Pthumeru would still be under their rule even on the surface, mingling with humans just as their rulers were...

And yes, the Hintertomb Tribe was once from Pthumeru, as Bone Marrow Ash is also found in the lower parts of that set of dungeons, such as the Ihyll and the Cursed Pthumerian Defilment. In fact, both the Lower Hintertomb and the cursed Chalice of Pthumeru are some of the only places where we can find Inflicted Organs. And what do we need those for? For the rotted offerings, most notably the Lower Hintertomb and the Cursed Chalice.

Rotted offerings are known to spawn new enemies, Rite Keepers and Tomb Prospectors, but most interesting are the Eye Collectors. This variant unique to the Rotted Offering have the power of summoning Mad Ones to disrupt dungeon crawling. And unlike the other two enemies, their spawn rates are higher in the Hintertomb Chalices, almost as if these crones were drawn to them.

[scarletooyoroi]

damn my genshin thoughts started acting up again.

lore possibility I never considered before-- Mainly to do after seeing that caribert quest again.

So I've been thinking for a hot minute. Exactly what goes and makes a Khaenri'ah pureblooded? How for them in particular, did it begin with a singular bloodline that seemingly the rest of Teyvat had no relation to?

I couldn't put my finger on it until I remembered two things in particular, that King Irmin exists and how from the sounds of it, the Irminsul plays a significant part in their lives. It lead me to believe this about them; humans born in the pureblooded Khaenriahn sense may of actually been created from the Irminsul, as part of theIR whole creation myth deal.

So why do I believe this? I want to lay out a few things!

Using this as the basis (and not exactly 1 for 1, I'm sure Genshin has it's spins on it.), I wanna expand on primarily where we can find the Ley line branches that we normally get.

exclusively from all Abyss order related enemies. This in itself I believe makes the starting mark, but how about we expand on this a bit more? This doesn't apply solely to them, but also the Hu (Human) model Ruin guards that out of all of them, are the only ones that sprout these extensions the way they do.

As far as my run ins went with the Khaenri'ah machines, I've never saw the more animalistic variants like jellyfish, crabs, so on and so far come to hold that anomaly factor amidst them.

While there could be a caveat in that the Black Serpent Knights certainly don't drop these branches. I've been of the mind they're too far corroded outside of their souls. For they still have the Deathly Statuette drops that both the BSR faction and the Abyss order Heralds/Lectors will actively drop from you.

So where could there be a harder factor to combine this? That a form of humanity could be made from the Irminsul trees? I'd like to look to none other than two particular excepts from Raiden Ei's and Wanderer's character stories. Mind you, while she found the techniques, as it shows, it never crossed into the territory where elements like Khemia would be involved.

As for Scaramouche's cast in unveiling more of this picture? Two excerpts to bring in.

This being a secret truth unveiled from the Archon quest. Normally, we'd never come to even learn that this was a thing otherwise. While the white tree in question always happens to be Irminsul.

Secondly.

Just to connect the two paths of their story, making it further solidified.

Unlike whatever Irmin had did however, it wasn't made with that particular that would truly make them Khaenri'ah born humans. Ei and Wanderer were made with divine aspects heavily in mind, while what we see from Khaenri'ah, humans there had an entirely natural lifespan. The curse of immortality wouldn't be such an active hampering on their existence otherwise, least I'd think so.

Now granted, we don't have the full details on what the Irminsul truly is. Did it exist during the dragon age? Was it a formation made when humanity became more prevalent, thus being able to link with their memories? Seeing how it has such an infused state with the memories in the land, being able to have them generate power in the form of artifacts and host the flow of Ley lines, I believe it's worth keeping an eye on!

As a lil fun fact, maybe this is why birds are so expressly open in always trying to sit on Ei and Wanderer respectably. lol.

Before I wrap this up! I do have one thought on how the Khaenri'ah specific worked. According to the Odin based legend up there, a particular that was required was this breath of life used to mold them. We actually do have an example of this! Rhinedottir through the mastery of Khemia managed to do this with Albedo, she however chose a divergence from the looks.

This mark I believe is what will always follow those who are made from this particular creation. While Rhinedottir has forged one method of doing so, that leads to a mystery in how Irmin, or whoever beforehand could've played a part of the creation of Khaenri'ahn natives made a true humans outside of how the Primordial One had introduced humanity into Teyvat.

I believe this may play a part in the Khaenri'ahn storyline as a whole, and certainly can't wait to see if this gains more ground or loses it! I'm down for any possibilities tbh.

Also what you doin down here reading this far!! Thank for joining me on this conjecture journey.

[cross-edition-dnd]

Today's DnD Creature, The Chimera

Editions appeared in: Chainmail, ODnD, DnD B/X, ADnD, ADnD 2e, DnD 3.5e, DnD 4e, & DnD 5e

Consistent Elements:

The Chimera is a winged amalgamation that infuses a lion, a goat, and a dragon into a single body with three heads.

Notable Differences:

From birds of a feather to bitter enemies. Originally, the Chimera in Chainmail was clumped in with other hybrid monsters, such as griffons, hippogriffs, and wyverns with few details. In DnD 5e, these creatures, along with dragons, manticores, and perytons, are considered rivals to each other.

Limited Draconic Speech. The chimera gains the limited ability to speak the language of red dragons in ADnD, though how limited this speech is remains unclear. In ADnD 2e, it is elaborated that chimeras are more likely to converse with more powerful creatures than itself, a trend that continues in DnD 3.5e where it speaks draconic rather than just the language of red dragons, though it may be likely to be more familiar with the speech of whichever dragon head it has than with others. In DnD 4e, it seems to know both common and draconic. In DnD 5e, the chimera is reduced to knowing draconic but being unable to speak it.

Chaotic Behavior. Not much is explained about the chimera’s behavioral patterns until ADnD 2e, where it can maintain a somewhat omnivorous diet due to its herbivore goat and carnivore lion and dragon heads. Though it’s made clear that the carnivores would only be satisfied with flesh. The lion and dragon heads also clash with one desiring to be in a pride and the other remaining in solitude in a cave respectively. No details of the chaotic nature is mentioned again until DnD 5e, where most of the chaos spawns from how each head is equally hostile, making it more of a threat to other creatures rather than be in conflict with itself.

Dark and no longer mysterious origins. The origins of how the chimera came to be remained unanswered for most editions, with ADnD 2e even stating it may be best to leave such things unanswered which implies a very dark truth. In DnD 5e however, the first chimeras were created by Demogorgon who took several creatures he was unimpressed with and infused them into the hybrid monsters we know, though how they don't know abyssal or aren't considered demons as a result is beyond me.

Moments of Ambushing. In ADnD 2e, DnD 3.5e, and DnD 5e, the chimera is noted to surprise its prey with swooping attacks from above. They mention its dragon head could use its breath attack as an alternative to biting. In ADnD 2e and DnD 3.5e, chimeras strike in concert if more than one chimera participates in the hunt. In DnD 5e, the chimera sprays the ground in flames as it swoops down before landing to attack.

Unfortunately for you… you are MANELESS. In most editions, the chimera was described or at least visually depicted with a mane for its lion head. Only in DnD 3.5e did the chimera lose its mane and was specifically described to be maneless. Not an important detail, just thought it was kinda funny.

Variant Dragon Heads. Throughout most editions, the chimera’s dragon head breathes fire. In DnD 3.5e, the game master is presented with a few options to swap the dragon head with any they wish, changing its breath weapon to the dragon head most appropriate with it, such as blue for lightning, green for poison, black for acid, and white for cold. In DnD 4e, the chimera has the standard stats for a fire-breathing red dragon one, but there is a note saying other variants exists. No details of these variants are mentioned in DnD 5e.

Unusual Mounts. In DnD 3.5e, there are unusual notes for the carrying capacity of a chimera, not dissimilar to notes given to mounts. In DnD 4e, it is explicitly stated that chimeras can be trained as guards or mounts. No details are given in other editions.

Expanded Territories. In ADnD 2e, chimeras were said to have territories of up to 20 square miles(which would be about ~5 miles wide). In DnD 5e, it was rephrased to have territories of up to 10 miles wide(which is about ~78 square miles).

Origins: In Greek Mythology, the Chimera was a unique creature that terrorized the countryside by eating cattle and spreading flames from its goat head. Bellerophon was able to slay it by riding Pegasus into the sky and pelting with arrows, which seems to imply it never had wings originally? [Wikipedia Article]

[chopper-writing-stuff]

The Scrap Queen

The air raid siren startled her. Avril stood up from the seat and looked around the hangar. Two guards, standing by the entrance, didn't move. They briefly stopped their chat to yell at her to get back to working on the plane. Avril sighed and sat back in the cockpit.

She checked the flaps, then airbrakes, ailerons and the elevator. The F-104 seemed to be responding properly. She stood up again, leaned out and pushed a pedal with her toes. Rudder was working too. With that she was basically done, but didn’t want to tell the guards yet. Maybe a quick break, and then she’ll take another look at the engine.

She didn’t want to unveil just how fast she can get an aircraft running. Just as with her leg, which seemed to have healed already, it was a piece of intel, and you don’t give out intel for free. Especially if you want to break out of jail.

She heard that from one of the convicts. Didn’t really work out for him, since he wound up here, but the theory checks out.

She fixed up a Super Hornet for that guy. She fixed up a lot of jets. At first, they were supposed to be able to just taxi around a dirty airstrip, to make the enemy think 444th Air Base was operational. In reality it served as a prison, and anyone who’s got a sentence and knows what an airplane is, was sent here to help keep up this farce. Avril was one of these people, but her case was special. While everyone else was parading the planes, she was brought here to make them. It didn’t take long for her to come up with a scheme. One day, when the warden was checking up on her in the hangar, she offhandedly remarked that just driving the aircraft around wouldn’t fool a toddler, and that the planes should take off from time to time.

“And what else, maybe fly back to Osea?” He laughed, but Avril saw a slight shift in his overall expression.

“You could rig the planes. A few circles in the air and come back, or the jet will shut down.” She hoped this didn’t sound too pushy, but the warden was hooked.

“And who would watch them? This is a prison, there’s no AWACS here.”

He said “them” instead of “you”. The warden mentally separated Avril from the rest of the convicts. That’s what she was hoping for.

“There is. I saw an E-2 in the scrapyard. I could fix it.”

She could hear the thoughts going in his mind. Now just a little push to make them take off.

“A flying squadron with early warning aircraft. Now this will look like a real base. Isn’t that what the brass wants?”

“I’ll have gone above and beyond… They ought to give me credit for that…”

And that’s how the Spare squadron came to be. The warden nominated his right hand man to work in the Hawkeye Avril put together. Surprisingly she didn’t need another one to source the parts from. But the same couldn’t be said for the jets that went to the convicts.

The intel guy’s F-18 had elevators with a paint scheme never seen on a Hornet before. They came from an F-15S/MTD. So basically the same part, but the guy frowned when he saw that. Another one, some fraud, got a Flanker. She said it was an Su-33 but technically it was more or less a 50/50 mix with a 27, plus some notable exceptions, like canards and wingtip hardpoints from a Terminator. The latter were painted yellow for some reason. Avril just shrugged it off. The scrapyard, expanded with planes brought in on the same ship as herself, was full of fighters from all over Osea and Usea. One day she was taking a vertical stabilizer from an F-16XL to put on a regular Viper. The strike variant had clear Heierlark Air Base markings. Also a cool livery, but the pilot didn’t appreciate that, when he climbed up to the cockpit and saw the top of the fuselage was a chequer of standard gray and green camo. But the work wasn’t always like that. Just last week she stumbled upon a seemingly brand new Mirage.

However, the plane she was sitting in right now was special. Avril began working on it when churning out new jets became routine enough the guards stopped checking them for engines rigged to shut down and removed ejector seats explosives. This Starfighter was fixed properly. This Starfighter would take her out of this hellhole.

Only one panel in the cockpit was loose - behind it was a notebook she found. In it Avril calculated her position based on the stars. She used working late and calibrating instruments as an excuse. Sky charts were memorized long before she got here - in the Eastern Usea. Soon she’ll take off into the dark blue sky and fly east towards Axel Bay. There she had contacts that could help.

“Hey, get out of there!” Someone shouted.

Avril stood up and turned to see who said that.

“Is this plane working? We’ve got a pilot.” Two new guards were escorting a man in the prison uniform and a helmet already on his head.

“No no no NO! It’s my plane, it’s my way out, it- it’s got my plans!” Avril discreetly pushed the loose panel shut and climbed out of the cockpit. She hoped the new guy - she didn’t think she had seen this pilot before - wouldn’t notice. And if he did, he could still crash. A few of them did before.

The convict shut the canopy. The guards standing by the door began to open it, while one of the escorts grabbed a bucket of white paint lying nearby.

Each prisoner would get white lines on the tail of their aircraft. Most of them had just one, for minor crimes and felonies. Only one has been convicted of murder - he got two. The new guy was getting

“Three sin lines?” Avril didn’t mean to ask it out loud but the words just sort of fell out of her mouth. “What did this guy do?”

“Killed Harling.” There was a hint of awe in the guard’s tone.

Vincent Harling. Osean president that got himself kidnapped during the last war. His replacement ignited the conflict even more instead of pushing for peace.

“That bastard stood at the beginning of the chain of events that landed me here.” Avril felt a little respect for the convict that was rolling out of the hangar, but then she snapped back.

“But if he’s anything like the other murderer and finds my escape plans, I’m done.”

Snitches were welcomed with open arms here. Avril was anxiously waiting for the pilot to come back, or not. After a long 20 minutes the roar of jets began to get louder and the planes started to land. Avril turned away from the pile of scraps she was organizing in the corner and came up to the line in the middle of the hangar. She stood there like a passenger awaiting the arrival of a train. Finally, the Starfighter with three lines taxied in. It stopped right in the center and its canopy opened.

Avril looked up to try and read the pilot’s expression. Did he notice the notebook? He took off his helmet revealing a head with an unremarkable haircut. Stepping down the ladder he glanced at the tail of the aircraft. Avril mustered up the strength and asked:

“So, how is the jet holding up? Any vibrations? rattling? loose-”

“No.” He answered without looking at her. He was about to walk up to the group of guards that came to escort him out, but hesitated for a second.”

“Axel Bay’s no good.” He said and walked away.

Note: A quick one shot this time. I wanted to share my headcanon about the Spare Squadron jets' appearances and make Avril actually good at planning escapes. Unfortunately she had no luck completing this one.

[undeath1245]

Murder Drones headcanon and theories

Lately, I became a fan of yet another one of Liam Vickers’ works, a 3D-animated web series by Glitch Productions, Murder Drones. It’s basically a web series about cute robots killing each other, and it mainly focuses our protagonists, angsty, hotheaded teen rebel Uzi and sweet, timid killing machine N, and their adventures in saving the planet Copper 9 from other Disassembly Drones sent to kill them. Also starring the show's psycho murder waifu, V.

So, I’d like to post some of my predictions for what’s going to happen in Murder Drones, as well as a couple of headcanon.

What I think the Worker Drones are...

The series stated that the Worker Drones are a line of sentient humanoid machines produced by JC Jenson, but I feel like they were built in part of a larger franchise, of which I call the Helper Drone franchise. The Helper Drones were first introduced over 60 years ago as a living home appliance, advertised as friendly robots who help do the chores, care for your children, and arrange your tasks. Throughout the years, the Helper Drone series had expanded across other workplaces through newer Helper Drone variants.

First off, there’s the Worker Drones, the robots that were built to perform endless, grueling manual labor, and as such, they are assigned to blue-collar professions such as construction, mining, manufacturing, sanitation, farming, and landscaping. There are also bigger variants of Worker Drones, Heavy-Duty Drones, that were built for extreme heavy-duty labor such as lifting 5 t. engines or maintenance in deep-sea extremities, and they also appear to be bulkier and taller than both the drones and humans (usual height being 7–8 ft.).

Next, we have Service Drones, robots that were built to provide service to customers, such as in restaurants, convenience stores, gas stations, and malls.

Then, there are Office Drones, robots that were built to perform droll, exhausting office work, like documenting and organizing files, providing customer support, and offering financial advice, so they’re basically white-collar robots. There’s also unique variants of Office Drones, Secretary Drones, that were built to serve as personal assistants for corporate executives, office managers, and government officials.

Next, there are Emergency Drones, robots that were built for emergency services, including the three primary emergency services: police services, fire services, and medical services.

Relating to the Emergency Drones, there are Medical Drones, robots that were built to perform medical practices such as physical exams, eye exams, and dental exams.

Also relating to the Emergency Drones, there are Security Drones, robots that were built to serve as security forces in various institutions  such as banks, malls, transit centers, schools, office buildings, and government buildings, and they also serve as bodyguards for very important figures like government officials and celebrities.

Then, we have Military Drones, robots that were built for military purposes, basic advanced infantry for armies, navies, marines, coast guards, air forces, and space forces.

Finally, we have the Disassembly Drones, the dangerous, oil-thirsty robots that were built to destroy runaway AI, enhanced with shapeshifting nanotechnology that allows them to change to any weapon they desire. They happen to be robot vampires, as they need oil to prevent themselves from overheating and need to stay away from the sunlight.

And about the titular Murder Drones, I feel like the term refers to either our main characters (the Murder Drone trio and the Worker Drone resistance, each of whom are eventually going to kill off a couple of enemies), or it could a new drone altogether, perhaps a hybrid between Worker Drone and Disassembly Drone. That’s where Uzi comes in.

The Worker Drones of Copper 9

There are numerous Worker Drone colonies all across Copper 9, each of them with their own cultures, including how each of them deal with Disassembly Drones. Most of the Worker Drone colonies (including Uzis colony; let’s call it the WDF Central Colony) hid underground through a large bunker system, while some of them continue to reside outside the bunkers while hiding from or fending off Disassembly Drones. These drones are regularly called Outside Workers or outsiders, and are often looked down upon by other colonies due to their “foolishness” for not choosing to hide in the bunkers. But then again, would you rather spend your entire life hiding underneath the bunkers like a coward and let these robot vampires wreak havoc onto your world?

I think that some of the Disassembly Drone squads don’t exactly follow orders to wipe out the Worker Drones of each sector, rather than enslave them instead. Now, I think that some of the squads already figured out that they couldn’t live without drinking warm, sweet oil, yet they’re programmed to destroy every Worker Drone they see, but they couldn’t disobey protocol. So to remedy this without disobeying the company, they decide to spare the entire populace of a sector, and in return, they sacrifice 10 to 20 Worker Drones every month or so, almost as if they’re farming Worker Drones now.

Now, there are a couple of Worker Drones that actually fought back against Disassembly Drones, according to J. Perhaps these drones had defied their programming and actually learned how to fight and defend themselves, and are probably equipped with state-of-the-art weaponry like rifles and cannons. I mean, surely the humans might have brought weapons here to Copper 9 in case they run into any extraterrestrial wildlife, creatures that they haven’t encountered before. But then again, was Copper 9 already devoid of life before? I mean, there seemed to be perpetual, worldwide blizzards before while the humans were there, or it could be the result of the planet’s core exploding. But, all that matters that these Worker Drones are probably armed and incredibly combative, so it’s plausible that they’ve fought Disassembly Drones before. But, had they ever killed one before?

Creation of the Disassembly Drones

I think that the Disassembly Drones are mostly recycled drones other than freshly built, battle-ready drones. When N said that he joined the Disassembly Drones in order to become useful, it makes me wonder if he used to be a regular drone before becoming a Disassembly Drone (perhaps he used to be a Secretary Drone), either that, or he was already built as a Disassembly Drone, and that he only said that he joined the squad that he’s in (with J and V). I have this feeling that these drones were actually recycled from other drones from Earth due to JC Jenson not wanting to spend billions of dollars on another useless product, not that they’ve already done that. To add another layer of incompetency on JC Jenson’s part, I think they also made Disassembly Drone prototypes years before, machines that seem more advanced and more powerful than the finished products, and were only built to hunt down rebel AI on Earth. Now, why couldn’t they finish these prototypes instead of wasting more money recycling other drones into new Disassembly Drones?

I have a theory that J, N, and V used to be regular Secretary Drones (or any other regular drone), and more or less, their demeanor remained the same. N was already friendly and happy, as he loved helping his human with whatever task they’re working on; strangely, he also received validation from his human, the one thing he currently desires as a Disassembly Drone. V was incredibly bored, having to deal with pompous, unruly executives most of the time, and the only solace she could find was from another fellow executive who also had to deal with their dipshit coworkers. And as for J, the first drone Uzi had killed, I think she was already a total bitch, also for dealing with pompous executives, but I think she adopted her bitchiness from her human. It’s just that after they were taken away and converted into Disassembly Drones, their past experiences with humans have been either wiped out or locked away into their artificial subconscious (the latter being the most likely, once again, due to JC Jenson’s incompetency).

Most of the Disassembly Drones’ names aren’t only based on the Latin alphabet, but also their former names, which happen to include the same phonetic as each alphabet; i.e. Kenneth – N. Ergo, their serial designation names were based on a phonetic of their former name, while some others’ serial designation names were based on the first letter of their former name (Ada, Beatrice, Caesar, Diesel, Eva, Efrem, Gina, Harriet, Isaac, Jane, Katie, Bella, Emma, Kenneth, Ophelia, Peter, Cueball, Archie, Marquess, Timothy, Unity, Genevieve, Winston, Xavier, Wyoming, Ezekiel).

What I think will happen in Murder Drones...

I believe that the show might last for 10 more episodes, or 20 to 30 episodes if Murder Drones gets renewed for more seasons like Meta Runner, as long as the story is well-contained. I think that the story might focus on two groups: the Murder Drone trio (I’ll explain later) and the Worker Drone resistance, so we might see two different stories shifting from one another, similar to how Internecion Cube (another web series by Liam) played out, with its story shifting from Max and IC-0n to Kirie.

The main story will focus on the Murder Drone trio (Uzi, N, and V), and yes, I included V because it seems painfully obvious that she will join our dynamic duo. It’s just that ever since the second preview of Murder Drones got released, I’ve been having this theory that V is getting bored of killing Worker Drones. I mean, could you imagine how monotonous it feels to kill Worker Drones, robots that generally couldn’t fend for themselves or fight back? I have a feeling that V wants to kill something that could fight back, so I assume that she would want to fight Disassembly Drones, robots that are incredibly dangerous and hard to kill, which provides a challenge for our little psycho murder waifu.

Back to the main story, the duo (or trio) will at first focus on scavenging some parts to repair the landing pod and escape the planet. But then, the trio will notice a new Disassembly Drone squad (the show’s first villains of the week) sent to destroy them, and then most likely replace the old Disassembly Drone squad (J, N, and V) and continue where they left off: wiping out the WDF Central Colony. After that, Uzi will realize that she has other Disassembly Drones all across the planet to wipe out, so with the help of N and V, she will begin her mission to finally free the planet of the Disassembly Drones’ reign of terror, and then repair the ship, head back to Earth, and wipe out humanity.

Let’s see how the trio’s character development will play out. Uzi will grow into a more dangerous, more efficient antihero, and would have to grow stronger and smarter as she’ll run into new enemies. Maybe she could work on her sick-as-hell railgun and give it upgrades, making sure that it doesn’t recharge for every 30 minutes from each use. And maybe, she’ll work on dealing with her teen angst after being rejected numerous times by her father, especially after he left her for dead. Plus, I’d love to see her bond with N and V more: N because it’s obvious that they’re the signature dynamic murder duo Liam has established, and V because they both have a total bloodlust (or oil-lust).

N, our adorable murder twink (I’m coining that). I have a feeling that he’s gonna get the validation he needs, particularly from Uzi, his new best friend. We would then learn more about him, not only from his times at some sort of training facility before he arrived at Copper 9, but also from his past interactions with other fellow Disassembly Drones, who probably either hate him or pity him. I kind of headcanon that N also has a sister, or a least an assigned sibling, and she also hates him, ever since she first met him. Now, V is an incredibly indifferent, super maniacal, super sadistic killer robot only interested in causing mayhem and maiming and tormenting her victims, but that doesn’t mean she’s immune from character development, like her Internecion Cube counterpart, IC-0n. Maybe she also has a softer side she hadn’t realized yet, and she sees that she can be nice whenever she wants to, which would irk her at first, and maybe we might see her actually bond with N, maybe these two could cuddle together, not that I ship them or anything.

Back to the WDF Central Colony, shitty father Khan Doorman contemplates on how he’s been treating his own metal and oil, the daughter he was supposed to take care of. So, I think he would work on his character development and build up some courage to protect the colony, actually fight back against the Disassembly Drones, and earn back his daughter’s respect; see the irony here? Perhaps he would reluctantly join a young, generic, ragtag team of teen rebels, of which basically includes Uzi’s classmates (including Thad and the two cheerleaders), and possibly (and ironically) become a father figure to them. Now, I think that their story would also revolve around some sort of a conspiracy, something that involves the colony council and the reason why the colony wasn’t able to fight back against the Disassembly Drones in the first place other than the fact that they’re super powerful and super indestructible.

Not only that we would see Khan’s needed character development, but also Thad’s character development and the cheerleaders’ character development. Not gonna lie, but these three characters seem to have a lot of potential to become bigger, more important characters later on. Maybe Thad starts to grow as more of a hero compared to Uzi growing as an antihero, and maybe he and Khan start to bond with each other as son–father figures; I sure hope Uzi doesn’t get jealous. And as for J’s remains, I think that the Worker Drone resistance might research them to learn about the Disassembly Drones’ weaknesses, including their weakness to sunlight. Maybe the cheerleaders might assimilate her remains into their bodies also. Or maybe, from what I’ve heard, J isn’t truly done for, and she might come back.

And as for Uzi, well, just because she’s the protagonist of the series, doesn’t necessarily means that she’s good person. As a matter of fact, I think she will willingly become a villain as the series goes by, you know, considering her apparent desire to destroy humanity instead of rebelling against JC Jenson like a good angsty teen rebel. There had been many theories on how Uzi developed her goal to destroy humanity, most of which involved her getting corrupted from an outside source, either from N stabbing her hand with his acid tail (her mother was also attacked by Disassembly Drones with nanite acid), using N’s saliva to cauterize her wound, or from J’s EMP blast. Now, I’ve been wondering something about the EMP blast, and instead of it being the cause of Uzi’s corruption, what if it made her corruption even worse?

I made a theory a couple of weeks ago that Uzi was already corrupted before she encountered N, as evident from her maniacal laughter while she was presenting her sick-as-hell railgun in class. It could be either a faulty code that was supposed to repress her vendetta against humans (many Worker Drones were most likely given that code already before the humans of Copper 9 got y**ted off from existence), or it was because of some virus planted by somebody else (maybe either a delusional anarchist or most definitely a vengeful ex-worker). Or maybe, it has something to do with her dead mother. There are many theories stating that her mom was actually a Disassembly Drone, and that she fell in love with Khan and defected from her squad. It could make plausible sense, considering Uzi’s talent with designing weapons and her will to fight back compared to other Worker Drones, who are normally cowardly. It’s possible that Uzi is half-Disassembly Drone herself, and that she was secretly given some Disassembly Drone features during her production, including a hidden nanite healing factor. Either that, or her mother was already a Worker Drone, and she was built with a faulty vendetta-repressing code like Uzi, thus growing a hidden grudge against humans and secretly it passing on to her daughter before her untimely death. Whichever way works, it could show us the very reason why humans fear corrupted AI.

Here’s how I think Uzi’s journey to villainy would go, starting with the first batch of Disassembly Drones she will kill. Remember what I said about the cheerleaders assimilating J’s parts into their bodies? I was thinking that Uzi would also assimilate Disassembly Drone parts into her body. First her right arm, then her legs and new acid tail, then her left arm, then the wings, and then the rest of her body, including the regenerating nanites. By the season finale, once she’s finished consuming the last Disassembly Drone, she would reemerge as the first produced Murder Drone, and possibly the most dangerous AI to ever emerge from JC Jenson’s territories. She also grows even more sociopathic and more maniacal than she was before, possessing a total lust for destruction and having zero sympathy for any potential casualties that get in her way, including the Worker Drones she’s supposed to be protecting. Not only this will conflict with her best friend, N, and her father, Khan, but also with V, of all people. Do N and V see no other choice but to do their job and disassemble her before she wreaks even more havoc? Or, do they stick by her side and join her in her reign against humanity, practically serving as her strongest subordinates? Or, will Uzi realize too late of what she’s becoming?

So, that’s all I want to share for Murder Drones. I have a couple of more ideas for the show, like predictions for future episodes or a couple of OC’s (some of which were inspired from Madness Combat), but I think I made this post long enough. I might post some MD fanart later on, starting with Uzi and her Murder Drone transformation. I just sure hope that Glitch manages to fund a full season of Murder Drones, so we can finally see the Murder Drone trio in action, and also see more of cute robots killing each other.

[strahdapologist]

@churchyardgrim replied:

holy shit this sounds so wild 👀 👀 if you don’t mind infodumping, i’d love to hear more about the Azalin Rex and Lyssa von Zarovich plotline, bc i hardly ever see ppl use Lyssa in CoS and i’m so intrigued O:

;u; honestly they’re both underutilized and such interesting characters esp if you want to drag out the campaign beyond the adventure module. as a long term plan i want azalin to be a final big bad since a lich is just such an iconic villain. this is ofc after they deal with the dark powers in barovia and my amber temple replacement but i’m getting ahead of myself also to my players AVERT YOUR EYES.

a lot of this began with me needing ways to spice things up since the players were more inclined to be strahd’s friend in an attempt to break the curse rather than his enemy. as a tatyana reincarnation was among them, strahd was also less bloodthirsty as a result. i really want to play purely evil strahd one day, but strahd as a sort of frenemy of the party has been really hilarious not gonna lie. it also made losing tatyana sadder in the last session lmao anyway

all about azalin

it started as a running gag about azalin stealing strahd’s marble since the characters were like strahd why do you live in the dirt and i was like fuck it. azalin i guess

but that evolved into the idea of azalin actually resurrected our reborn character radu (and alek reincarnation) since that was left up to the dm to decide for the player. that snowballed into azalin pulling multiple strings behind the scenes because something that stood out to me in i, strahd: the war against azalin is just how much that lich hates strahd and wants barovia.

in my game now, azalin thinks strahd is unfit to rule because of his emotional attachment to tatyana. unable to expand his own magical prowess, azalin seeks power by taking over surrounding domains.

as he cannot leave darkon, he has been using sending spells/astral projection to set his plan in barovia in motion. over strahd’s depression nap, azalin was able to not only resurrect alek, but also recruit some allies within ravenloft who were unhappy with strahd’s moodswings.

he also rescued lyssa von zarovich from her medical coma, knowing she would be an ally he could count on.

he anticipated alek to be much more antagonistic against strahd, and was disappointed when radu eventually tried to become strahd’s best friend, so he decided to target tatyana instead to hurt strahd and push him back into his depression and allow azalin to plant his own puppets in ravenloft

with tatyana’s death, he has successfully taken over ravenloft via zoom essentially

everything lyssa von zarovich

according to the lore, lyssa is a talented necrologist and inventor of the vampiric mindflayer, so i brought mindflayer variants into barovia.

it was connected to a player’s backstory, who found out the reason his old gang turned on itself and killed many of its own was in exchange for psionic abilities, granted to them thanks to lyssa von zarovich who was able to induce a state of semi-ceremorphosis.

baldur’s gate 3 helped in terms of ideas in this regard lol but the deathlock bandits as they are now called are a part of lyssa’s growing army of mindflayer mutants and vampiric mindflayers which she has been making in the furthest regions of barovia, just outside of strahd’s reach

another player character’s yaya was nearly turned into a mindflayer, but van richten was able to stop the process.

lyssa is currently azalin’s proposed new ruler of barovia alongside some of strahd’s court (consorts in the original adventure) which has chosen to betray him

my plan is for lyssa to be the big boss at the end of a vicious dungeon crawl through the crypts of ravenloft as the gang needs to retake the castle and i am EXCITED to run this next section of the campaign

[ohthehypocrisy]

Starmie for Pokemon Unite!

Season 1

Prev: Torterra - Scrafty

As far as Gen 1 pokemon go, Starmie is actually one of the better designed pokemon based off of a ‘real world’ object. There are many ways to design a starfish pokemon, but giving it a gem heart at the center of its body certainly adds to the aesthetic of a mostly immobile bottom feeder.

And yet it’s this simplicity that allows Starmie to endure as a well designed pokemon. I doubt we’ll be seeing regional variants of this pokemon anytime soon simply because of how iconic it is. But will that help it out in Pokemon Unite? Let’s take a closer look.

Back in my day, these were the numbers of a fast special attacking sweeper, but nowadays, these numbers tend to underperform. High Speed is unusual for a starfish, but with the ability to spin its body around like a shuriken, it’s got some definite speed to it. That said, Starmie uses its speed to fire off cosmic rays and waves of water, and for that reason, Starmie is best suited to the role of an...

Attacker

Basic Attack - Ranged/Sp. Atk

Lock onto a single target, then fires off a particular beam that focuses on the enemy for 5 seconds, dealing damage constantly. If any other enemies cross paths with the beam, they will also receive damage.

Staryu and Starmie attack by firing a psychic beam from the gem in its core. It does this by floating horizontally, with the gem pointed to the sky, allowing it to fire its beam at any enemy from any angle. The beam attack ends when the target is KOd.

It is possible for the attack to end early because the target moved too far out of range. However, the limited range of this attack extends well beyond the visible screen.

The basic attack will only target those in range, like a regular basic attack. Once the beam is locked on, it will continue to deal damage to the enemy and any other target that crosses paths.

The rate of damage is affected by the basic attack speed, which can be modified. Unlike most other Special ranged attacks, Starmie’s basic attack utilizes solely its Sp. Atk stat.

This goes without saying, but Starmie/Staryu cannot score while your basic attack is active, which is optimal, as they cannot effectively score with enemies nearby considering your frailty.

The basic attack can be cancelled by hindrances. If Full Heal is used at the right time, the attack will not be interrupted.

Oh, how dazzling! With all of that psychic power concentrated in its gem, I guess we shouldn’t be surprised at its ability to fire off deadly laser beams. Speaking of psychic power, this is how Starmie (and Staryu) are able to lock on to enemies and harass them with psychic damage, making it difficult for enemies to escape. And by that I mean the range of this attack reaches very far, requiring the enemy to retreat well beyond screen in order to break the attack.

That said, Starmie needs the enemy to be in range in order to set off the beam in the first place, and that means getting a visual on the enemy the old fashion way. Once you’ve got a bead on the target, though, you should hang back, pull out of sight, and let the beam deal with the enemy. Not only does it put the hurt on the target, but any enemy in between will also be damaged. Paired with a teammate that has great push potential, like Block Snorlax or Drill Peck Dodrio, and this beam can be really stretched out, greatly expanding its potential area of damage. (Some moves, like Talonflame’s Unite Move, Flame Sweep, are a little TOO good at pushing enemies away, and can end up breaking off the beam attack, forcing the attack to end)

But because Starmie is hyper focused on attacking, it cannot score while the beam is active. It’s not a good idea to try and score while enemies are nearby anyway, because of how squishy Starmie is. A couple of solid hits will put Starmie down, sporting the same defensive prowess of pokemon like Cinderace or Absol. Even so, this makes it very difficult for Starmie to make a bold score in the early game, fishing for those stacks to power up its Aeos Cookie or Sp. Atk Specs. 

This is where Starmie comes into its own and utilizes a rare playstyle in Pokemon Unite called Kiting. The gist of Kiting is that a player stays out of range of their opponent’s counter attack options while still staying in range themselves to attack. Starmie isn’t just built to do this, it HAS to play like this due to its low defenses and HP. But thankfully, all of its moves are tailored to this specific playstyle, starting with its ability.

Ability: Illuminate

Reveals enemies hiding in tall grass when nearby. Your basic attack deals more damage the more enemies there are in the path of the beam.

The range of Illuminate is the same as your basic attack. This is because you need a viable target to start using the basic attack, and would normally fail to lock on to an enemy hiding in tall grass.

Hidden enemies will also be revealed to teammates and will also show up on the minimap.

The damage multiplication effect of Illuminate applies instantly. Will not apply if an enemy is unstoppable or otherwise unable to be targeted, such as when they are in the middle of scoring a goal.

The damage multiplication effect of Illuminate is weaker than you’d expect, but it applies to enemies and wild pokemon. There is no damage cap for the boost.

Thought you could hide from this bright star? Think again! Because Starmie’s basic attack requires a target to lock on to, hiding out in tall grass would normally be an effective stopgap to its ability to start dealing damage. This ability is meant to help itself rather than its teammates, but they will also be able to see enemies revealed by Illuminate. Best case scenario, a teammate hiding out in the tall grass becomes privy to enemies hiding in another patch of tall grass nearby as Starmie approaches, foiling an ambush. 

Aside from that, it also has the bonus effect of dealing multiplying damage to multiple enemies. Because it requires proper positioning to get the most damage, you’ll find yourself circling around team fights trying to line up for that perfect shot. This is normal fair when you need to make multiple hits in one shot, such as with Spirit Shackle Decidueye or Hyper Beam Dragonite, but for Starmie, it needs to keep that position constantly. Because Illuminate boosts damage for each extra target caught in the beam, not only do you need to have the perfect line up, you also have to stay out of trouble and keep an eye on the fight so you don’t get one shot by a stray Pyro Ball or Solar Beam, and you have to do this focused for the duration of the attack. It’s not an easy task.

The effort is worth it, though, as enemies will be run ragged by the relentless rays of the raging tides. That said, it does make Starmie a little anxious to engage in one-on-one fights, as the damage takes a while to build up whereas enemies will have no qualms with expending both of their moves to secure a KO on a problematic attacker. Not to worry, though, as you have moves to handle such engagements.

At the start of the game, Starmie will start out as Staryu. You can choose between Rapid Spin or Swift as your first move. By Level 3, you will have learned both.

Move 1: Rapid Spin

Starts spinning horizontally at a very fast pace for 5 seconds. While spinning, your movement speed is increased and your basic attack will fire constantly until the move ends. You also deal weak damage constantly to nearby enemies. 8s cooldown.

When Starmie/Staryu use their basic attack normally, they float on their backs, with the gem side pointed up at the sky. When using moves like Rapid Spin, they start spinning in this position.

Rapid Spin effectively adds 5 seconds to the amount of time your basic attack runs for, allowing it to deal damage for more than 5 seconds. If you use your basic attack during Rapid Spin, the move ends first but your basic attack will continue firing for another 5 seconds.

If an enemy is KOd while Rapid Spin and your basic attack is active, the basic attack ends but Rapid Spin will continue to spin. Another enemy can be targeted in this time, but Rapid Spin will still run out after 5 seconds and any leftover time is added to the basic attack.

The move can end early by pressing the button again. Staryu cannot score while using Rapid Spin, just like Blastoise.

Something something bay blades, anyway. As one of the original pioneers of the move, Staryu spins with great effect. Rather than blow away stray hazards, Staryu spins to focus its psychic power, augmenting its basic attack even further. There will be moments where your basic attack runs out of time at the worst moment, or that the enemy managed to run away, even with your expanded range. Rapid Spin solves both of those problems by not only giving you a speed boost, but it also adds extra seconds to the run time of your basic attack. Not only does this make it more effective at chasing down your enemies, it also increases your agility, letting you circle around crowds faster, looking for that perfect line up. The high cooldown is a bit of a bummer, though, but that just means you shouldn’t be hasty when it comes time to spin.

One upside though is that, as a starting move, it lets you reach the middle of the lane a lot faster than other pokemon. But that’s not a very appealing prospect as that just means you’ll run into your enemies faster. It’s also an OK move against wild pokemon, as the attack actually does have a small hitbox that can damage enemies up close with all of that spinning. And let’s be real, there’s no way you’ll get away with dealing weak damage to actual players up close.

Move 2: Swift

Send out a flurry of star shaped projectiles, each one homing in on any number of targets. The number of stars that home in on each target is random. Deals more damage to enemies being targeted by your basic attack. 6s cooldown.

The move cannot be used if no viable targets are within range.

When multiple enemies are present, a random number of stars will target the viable enemies. 5 stars are launched as a Staryu, whereas 10 stars are launched as a Starmie. The star projectiles are distributed randomly among targets, meaning it is possible for an enemy to avoid damage by chance.

Maximize damage by using Swift on a single enemy targeted by your basic attack.

It cannot be overstated just how iconic Swift is to pokemon like Starmie. Not only is it the most common starting move, it’s also literally in the name, as Swift in the literal Japanese translation means ‘Speed Star’. And oh look, that’s what Starmie is.

Back to Staryu, although it starts out with this move, this would be the first time the move is actually treated as a sure-hit attack (Espeon and Sylveon both can learn Swift as a starting move in Pokemon Unite, but both moves can miss). That said, it comes with some caveat in exchange for accuracy (metaphorically, and literally). For starters, Swift cannot be used if there is no valid target. This also includes enemies that are unstoppable or otherwise untargetable, as the move cannot recognize them as a valid target. Not only that, for a flurry of stars, the attack is very weak, which makes it very inconsequential for enemies if they are in range, and the resulting damage isn’t anything to worry about.

Of course, this is Pokemon Unite, where most of the Water Types in the game use Surf in their own unique way (even including Mew, which isn’t a Water Type at all, but rather uses Blastoise’s method of attack rather than coming up with their own spin on the move). For each pointy bit of its body, Staryu launches 5 star shaped projectiles outward. If there is only 1 viable target in range, those stars will all deal damage to that one target. When Staryu evolves into Starmie, Swift shoots out 10 stars, one for each point on its body, but it still follows the same formula. Of course, it’s all up to chance where each projectile hits, and it’s even possible for an enemy to avoid damage altogether just by chance. The way it goes is that each star chooses a random target as the move is used, and that’s the only rule. If there are 2 viable targets, there’s an extremely low chance all stars will target the same enemy, and those odds lower even more when Staryu evolves.

That said, the move is still very weak, and is best used when multiple enemies are weakened with your basic attack. Oh, right, Swift has one more boon going for it, and that is that each star projectile deals more damage to an enemy being damaged by your basic attack. If Swift is used while there is only 1 viable target, and you are using your basic attack on that specific one, the projectiles will each deal double damage, drastically boosting your overall damage output. This increases even further when you evolve into Starmie, boosting the number of projectiles launched. In a sense, if everything is set up correctly, Starmie can really put the hurt on a singular enemy, making them much better at taking on objectives like Regieleki or one of the Regis by themselves.

But now it’s time to talk about the real star of the show, me. As in, Starmie. Heh, get it? Haheh, eh...well, Starmie’s name in Japanese is the same, so I think the joke still works...

At Level 6, Staryu evolves into Starmie. At the same time, Rapid Spin will become either Surf or Cosmic Power.

Move 1a: Surf

Summons a torrent of water and ride the wave, increasing your movement speed for 6 seconds. Enemies will be damaged, shoved, and stunned when they get too close. Your basic attack will deal more damage to enemies the closer they are and it will fire constantly until the move ends. If you KO an enemy with your basic attack and Surf is still active, you will automatically attack the next viable target. 9.5s cooldown.

At Level 11, Surf becomes Surf+.

KOs extends the duration of the move by 1.5 seconds.

Starmie uses the same animation as Rapid Spin, but with a visible rush of water underneath.

When an enemy is KOd with your basic attack while Surf is active, the next viable target will be chosen and attacked. If no viable targets are within range, the basic attack ends.

The basic attack deals more damage when enemies are close by, but can be pushed back by Surf’s shove effect. This is intentional as Starmie is capable of stun locking an enemy and dealing maximum damage. However, this is very risky as you hyper focus one enemy and are vulnerable to being attacked by their teammates, but very good for dealing with objectives like Regieleki or Rayquaza.

The max damage range of Surf’s boosted damage for your basic attack is near Surf’s active hurtbox, and the shove effect moves enemies past that.

In contrast, the minimum damage output is further out, the same range as your basic attack’s targeting range. The attack doesn’t get any weaker if enemies are damaged at or beyond this range.

Just like Rapid Spin, Surf can be cancelled by using the move again.

Surf improves upon everything that Rapid Spin does and more. Not only does it damage enemies, it will also push them away on hit, helping to remedy Starmie’s problem dealing with melee attackers. Actually, this attack does a lot to help with that front, as Surf further increases the damage you deal to enemies that are very close by. While it does seem to conflict with the push effect, Surf will also stun enemies on hit, and with the added movement speed boost, you can splash against these enemies repeatedly, all while burning a hole through them with your basic attack. 

Not only that, Surf has a bonus effect where it will automatically target a new enemy if your basic attack KOs the original target. Sure, it’s only 1 second more than Rapid Spin, but this one little change makes it very easy to handle multiple enemies, especially if they’re on the frail side. Now, if the enemy has resistance or immunity to hindrances, that can be bad news for you, as they can get up close and wallop you without fear of being pushed back. However, the bonus damage dealt to enemies up close still applies, and is much stronger against opponents within this close range. Because Surf typically pushes enemies away, the bonus damage multiplies to a crazy high level, but only because they aren’t supposed to be that close in the first place. No matter what they are doing, you’ll be able to deal massive amounts of damage, possibly more than they can deal to you.

It seems like there’s nothing bad about this move, and there generally isn’t. However, please keep in mind that Starmie is a frail Attacker, typical of the archetype. Starmie can take 2 or 3 hits while Surfing, but it’s meant to be used defensively rather than diving in. Not only that, you are still vulnerable to hindrances, which can cancel your basic attack, leaving you defenseless. While you are faster, this move does little to improve your matchup against other ranged Attackers, especially if they have the ability to stun and shove, like Decidueye or Gardevoir. Do not get carried away just because you’re shredding those waves.

Move 1b: Cosmic Power

Gathers up star power and fortify your defenses for 8 seconds. The pokemon is protected from stat reducing effects and passive damage moves left behind by the enemy team. The next time you use your basic attack, it will deal damage for an additional 3 seconds and the attack will fire constantly, even while the pokemon is affected by hindrance. 10s cooldown.

At Level 11, Cosmic Power becomes Cosmic Power+.

KOs extend the duration of your defense boost and protections by 1 second.

Protection from stat reducing effects include the Slow Smoke item and Speed Flux zones on the enemy’s side of the map. Passive damage protection includes moves like Duraludon’s Stealth Rock and Charizard’s Fire Blast.

The basic attack boost provided by Cosmic Power will be confirmed with a visual of small stars where the basic attack boost bar would normally be.

Unlike Surf and Rapid Spin, Starmie will only flash upwards at the sky for a second. This is a visual indicator to your teammates and enemies that Cosmic Power is locked and loaded. The spinning effect during your boosted basic attack will be accompanied by glittering stars instead of water.

If Cosmic Power+ is used while you are already under the effects of boosted defense and protection, it will add to the timer of those effects by another 8 seconds. It is possible to gain this amount with KOs through Cosmic Power+.

The basic attack empowered by Comsic Power will continue to fire even while the pokemon is being shoved around and affected by hindrance. Even Charizard’s Unite Move, Seismic Slam, will not stop this attack.

Rather than focusing on speed and mobility, Starmie leans to the other side of the spectrum with Cosmic Power, granting it not only more defense, but also immunity to passive effects. Not only that, it also adds another 3 seconds of time to your basic attack, which is actually a lot less than Rapid Spin or even Surf. However, what Cosmic Power lacks, it makes up for in granting you a basic attack that cannot be turned off, even while under the effect of hindrances. If your build is optimized for maxing out the damage of your basic attack, or if you see that the opposing team will be carrying a lot of crowd control, Cosmic Power is the way to go.

Now, the defense boost won’t do much for a frail Attacker like Starmie, as it allows it to take maybe an extra hit or two. But the point of Cosmic Power is to allow you to keep attacking and not get done in by a stray hit while you’re circling the mosh pit. It keeps you from getting one-shot by Decidueye’s Spirit Shackle or Venusaur’s Solarbeam, allowing you to keep up the offensive pressure from a safe distance. Not only that, but the defensive boons allow you to completely ignore effects like Slow Smoke or Sludge Bomb. Granted, you really shouldn’t linger in these effects for long anyway, as it’s hard to keep track of the duration of Cosmic Power in the heat of battle. The whole point of the move is to make it easier for you to Kite while launching your basic attack nonstop. To that end, Cosmic Power does come with the same weaknesses as Rapid Spin, in that if the enemy is KOd, those extra 3 seconds you got are wasted. Thankfully, Cosmic Power+ does grant you extended protection with each KO, but then it comes down to your own skill. Do you target a Defender to get the most out of Cosmic Power’s extra 3 seconds of attack, or do you focus on an Attacker that’s protected by shields?

Between Surf and Cosmic Power, it’s a matter of mobility versus security. Surf let’s you ride around dealing fast damage, while Cosmic Power protects you from interruptions and passive effects. Choosing one depends on figuring out which issue will be harder to handle without it. That’s why Staryu evolves at Level 6, to give you enough time to figure this out, and to ensure that you are leveling up properly against the opponent, as solid Kiting will give you lots of EXP really fast.

At Level 8, Swift becomes either Psybeam or Power Gem.

Move 2a: Psybeam

Fires a beam in a straight line, damaging multiple enemies. Afterwards, any enemy damaged will be marked. The next time you use your basic attack, an additional ray beam will be fired and damage the marked enemy, even if they are out of range. Your basic attack can target another enemy in range. Both rays can target a single enemy. 8s cooldown.

At Level 13, Psybeam becomes Psybeam+.

If an enemy is KOd while your basic attack is firing multiple beams, the remaining beams deal increased damage.

The mark is a graphic of a pink psychic eye. Enemies with this mark will be damaged by an additional laser, even if they are out of range of your basic attack. The mark lasts for 5 seconds.

A marked enemy can be targeted initially by your basic attack, dealing increased damage to that enemy.

The extra beams can be forced to end early if the enemy moves too far out of range, just like your basic attack normally.

The multiple beams can be cancelled by inflicting a hindrance on Starmie. If an enemy becomes invincible or unstoppable while being targeted by the beam, the attack is cancelled. 

If an enemy is targeted by your beam while out of range, your basic attack can be used again if another viable target is within range. Both beams have an independent timer of duration.

The multiple beams all deal base damage equal to your basic attack’s damage output. Psybeam+ will deal extra damage to remaining enemies if marked enemies are KOd by this attack.

Psybeam+ will not deal increasing damage if a marked enemy moves too far out of range and forces the beam to disappear.

Like a well lined cue ball in a game of pool, Starmie makes a clean shot, hitting multiple enemies in one go with Psybeam. Although the damage isn’t all that great, the followup more than makes up for it, as it turns each target into a separate receiver of your basic attack. If an enemy gets hit, they have no chance of escaping, as even moving out of range of Starmie’s basic attack doesn’t save them from getting lasered. And not only that, the damage doesn’t get compromised at all, as each beam deals damage running off of your basic attack’s normal damage output, meaning it can be increased with X Attack or Muscle Band.

And keep in mind that Illuminate is still boosting the damage output of your basic attack when you’ve got multiple enemies lined up in the laser. Now, it doesn’t boost the damage just because you’ve got multiple enemies on the receiving end of all of these lasers, but if there are any targets stuck in the path of even one of these beams, the entire network of lasers gets the attack boost, so it’s no big deal if you miss an opponent or two from the initial beam.

Now, Psybeam still has the same learning curve as your basic attack, in that you’ll need to line up more than one target in the heat of battle to fully abuse this attack. You’ll be in big trouble anyway if you run into more than one enemy, especially if they’re a high damage Attacker or Speedster. Starmie benefits a lot from competent teamwork, with teammates distracting the enemy, allowing you to fight from the edge of battle, taking the lucky shot with Psybeam, and then circling around the scuffle like a snooty satellite recording the fight on their phone. For all of its boons, Starmie is still a frail Attacker, and is vulnerable to getting one shot if you’re not careful or prepared. The beams can still be cancelled by hindrances, so you’ll want to be extra wary of stray attacks. 

That said, Psybeam+ has a really great upgrade that makes handling hordes better. If even one enemy gets KOd from Psybeams multiplying beams, the remaining beams get stronger. This is meant to handle the typical 3 Attackers per team structure that’s been popping up more often, and is especially handy if the enemy has already been worn down by a Defender or All-Rounder. More often than not, though, the opposing Defender will be the last one standing in these crowded team fights, which is something to keep in mind when all of your moves are on cooldown.

The only weakness to this attack is if the crowd of enemies is backed by a competent Supporter, as they can either heal more damage than you can deal, or shut you down with any number of hindrances at their disposal. That’s kind of embarrassing, to be honest...

Move 2b: Power Gem

Launch a stone made of light directly forward. Afterwards, the enemy will be marked and your basic attack will target this enemy only, allowing you to target this enemy even if they are out of range. Upon attacking, the beam will split off and deal constant damage to the target and all other enemies near the initial target. The less enemies there are, the greater the damage. 9.5s cooldown.

At Level 13, Power Gem becomes Power Gem+.

Increases damage. Extends the duration of this moves’ effect on the marked enemy when an enemy is KOd by the split beams.

The marked graphic is that of a pink stone much like Starmie’s central gem.

The mark wears off after 7 seconds, whether you deal damage to the enemy or not.

Power Gem+ extends the duration of the mark by 1.5 seconds for each KO.

The range of the split beams is the same as your basic attack. The split beam deals 150% of your basic attack’s damage and decreases the more enemies there are, to a minimum of 100%. 

If the marked enemy is too far out of range, the attack will fail. 

The split beams deal more damage than your basic attack’s base damage, but otherwise can be affected with items such as Muscle Band and X Attack.

See, light refracts when it shines through bright gemstones, creating a rainbow effect. The same principle applies with Power Gem, as you hit an enemy with a gemstone, bedazzling them with it, then shoot them with a beam that causes the light to splinter and damage all nearby enemies. The result is a beautiful fractal light show of death and destruction.

Where Psybeam rewards skillful alignment, Power Gem is a decisive shot that picks an enemy to become the center of attention. On hit, your basic attack will only hit that target, which can be a problem if they move too far out of range, robbing you of an attack to defend yourself with. On the upside, Power Gem is a great answer to pick apart team compositions that like to stay together, hunkered closely with their Defender or Supporter. Pick your target and shoot, preferably a bulky enemy, then start the light show. The resulting split beams damage any nearby enemy, forcing the group to disband or perish. The beams deal more damage the less targets there are, which help deal with invincible duos like a Supporter and an All-Rounder. Speaking of which, you’ll want to target a Defender or an All-Rounder for this as, if you end up KOing an Attacker you had marked with Power Gem, the whole attack ends early, greatly diminishing your return. 

Not only is this move great for dealing with crowds, it’s also a great spearhead for a push in either lane, with proper kiting, of course. Weakened enemies will be forced to retreat, leaving the marked enemy alone to fend for themselves. Power Gem+ exacerbates this even further, as KOs extend the duration of the mark. Combined with Surf or Cosmic Power, you’ll be firing a never ending stream of rainbows at the opponent.

However, just like with Psybeam, Power Gem does have its own share of weaknesses. If an enemy realizes they’ve been marked, they can simply move out of range for the attack to fail, as your basic attack will be locked on to only the marked target. Also, while the spread damage is great, it does get weaker the more it splits, but it will never fall below 100% of your basic attack’s normal damage output. If the entire enemy team decides to rush in, you’ll more than likely find yourself getting KOd before you can deal any meaningful impact on the opposing team’s HP. Not to mention, you’re still vulnerable to hindrances, as they can cancel the attack. But unlike Psybeam, the mark doesn’t wear off just because you get knocked silly, and you can resume attacking right away if you’re able to. 

With all of that said, there is one glaring caveat to these moves. While they do deal great damage, the moves serve to augment your basic attack and little else. As a Special Attacker, Starmie can make great use of  items like Muscle Band or Scope Lens, but cannot utilize Shell Bell or Choice Specs. That’s because the basic attack is powered by items that boost basic attack damage, whereas items like Choice Specs only power up the pokemon’s moves. The Sp.Atk boost they provide do power up the damage of your lasers, but that’s it. The only Sp.Atk boosting item that Starmie would be able to use is the Sp.Atk Specs, as the stacking scores power up the damage of your basic attack, spreading the damage even more if the moves target multiple enemies.

Unite Move: Sea of Stars

Summons a beautiful swirl of sparkling sea water that whirls around the pokemon. For 8 seconds, the swirling water slows down the movement speed and basic attack speed of all enemies within range. When enemies are damaged by your basic attack, a glowing beam is cast from the target, dealing damage to all nearby enemies.

The Unite Move’s range fills up nearly the entire screen.

Reduces movement speed and basic attack speed of affected enemies by 50%.

The damaging glow deals damage using your Sp. Atk, and can be increased with modifiers like X Attack and items like Muscle Band.

The movement speed and basic attack speed is reduced even further when enemies are affected by the damaging glow effect of your basic attack. The reductions multiply when the damaging glow effects overlap. However, this is a weak multiplier, meant only to increase the effects by a low 8% or such.

The damaging glow only affects those within range. Can be combined with Psybeam or Power Gem to spread damage.

You are still vulnerable to hindrances.

With a dazzling light show like this, I think I can see why Starmie is part psychic, as such a mesmerizing bath bomb like this is mind blowing. Eh? Get it? Because, the mind... never mind.

Anyway, this Unite Move is meant to patch up all of Starmie’s issues when engaging in enemies, and that’s to handle the dangerous attack power of just about the entire enemy team. Just by getting swept up in the attack, enemies will have their attack speed reduced by 50% and their movement hindered similarly (they can still dash around). While it certainly helps your team pick up KOs, it also greatly augments your basic attack, as the laser causes a damaging glow effect on contact with the enemy. This glow is half as powerful as your basic attack, but the damage racks up when these glowing auras overlap with moves like Psybeam or Power Gem. When used strategically at objectives like Regieleki or Rayquaza, it greatly boosts your team’s ability to fend off the entire opposing team.

The weakness of this Unite Move is the same, though, as you are still weak to hindrances. Getting knocked silly will also end the duration of Psybeam or Power Gem’s spread damage, which will drastically reduce your overall damage. Not only that, but if you’re getting stunned into next week, you’ll find yourself KOd soon after, even with a Buddy Barrier active. Sure, you can use Cosmic Power to survive a hit or two, but it won’t be as effective if you’re putting yourself in the middle of the team fight. Just like I’ve stated before, Starmie plays extremely well when fighting from the edge of battle, kiting around opponents and staying just out of reach of their counter attacks. It may seem like a waste to kite while using your Unite Move, and it is. The best way to use Sea of Stars is to pop it when the entire enemy team has been weakened by your moves or by your teammates, as the reduced HP makes it easier to KO multiple enemies.

Stars die quickly when they’re the center of attention. You’re just as influential from the sidelines, don’t forget that.

Holowear

While Starmie doesn’t wear clothes normally, clothing can be a bit of an issue due to its penchant to, well, spin all over the place. To amend this, we have to decorate Starmie like an ornament rather than fit it with some clothing, especially if they look better while Starmie is spinning. First up is the Glitter Style holowear, where small little star clips of various sizes and colors have been tacked on to its body and arms. Then there is Storm Style, outfitting Starmie with a large black cloud on its back and lightning bolt cutouts taped to its arms. How about Bow Tie Style, decorating Starmie with lots of bows and ribbons of different colors, making it look very hypnotizing when it spins. Lastly, there’s Fireworks Style, giving Starmie a lit sparkler on each arm and little firecrackers strapped to its body that go off when the pokemon spins, perhaps this can be a Legendary skin due to all the effects it emits.

Strategy

Now, as I’ve stated multiple times, Starmie has to kite to survive and play effectively in Pokemon Unite. Just as a quick refresher, Kiting means to play by staying out of an enemy’s counter attack range but staying just close enough to keep attacking, which Starmie excels at thanks to their basic attack. This is exacerbated greatly with Starmie’s low HP and defenses, forcing it to rely on smart positioning and social distancing.

At the start of the game, Starmie can go into any area, but picking top or bottom requires a competent early game attacker that can complement your kiting game plan when you run into enemies. Staryu will have some difficulties KOing wild pokemon until it evolves, so having a teammate that can share EXP can give you a good head start. In a weird sense, you’ll be gaining more EXP from defeating the enemy rather than farming wild pokemon, which means you’ll have to take kiting very seriously. 

When you do level up and evolve, choosing between Surf and Cosmic Power is a matter of responding to the enemy team’s composition. If they have plenty of troublesome melee All-Rounders or Speedsters, Surf can be very helpful in keeping your distance, as it knocks and stuns enemies that get to close, while also providing a speed boost. If the enemy has a troublesome Defender or Attacker that will gladly crowd control you into submission, Cosmic Power would be the better option, as it protects you from hindrances and debuffs the enemy will throw at you. Neither of these moves will be all that helpful in fending off the enemy alone, so don’t test your luck when you’re surrounded.

Power Gem and Psybeam are both moves that can help handle hordes of enemies that like to stick together, operating in their own way. Psybeam requires getting that lucky shot with multiple targets, but is extremely rewarding. Power Gem, on the other hand, requires great accuracy in singling out a bulky target, making them the center of the followup attack that greatly damages their teammates. While both are useless against single enemies, it’s a given that most teams will have a reliable Supporter or All-Rounder that they’ll rally around (and if they don’t, they aren’t likely to win the game either way). The attacks really pay off when it comes time to engage at map objectives, Regieleki and Rayquaza, as you’re guaranteed to run into multiple enemies contesting for that final hit (and if they aren’t, well, Illuminate sniffs out enemies hiding in the tall grass waiting to snipe). It all comes down to how well you’ve mastered these attacks, and how solid your execution is.

As mentioned, your Unite Move, Sea of Stars, is best used to continue your kiting scheme, keeping your distance from enemies, moving inward when the enemies have all been weakened, and racking up those KOs to secure the objective. However, do not forget that you are still vulnerable to hindrances, and can be easily one-shot by a stray Solar Beam or Spirit Shackle. 

When it comes down to your loadout, you must be wary of items that boost the power of your moves like Choice Specs. Surf, Cosmic Power, Psybeam, and Power Gem, they all augment your basic attack in some way, but do not deal as much damage by themselves, rendering the boost from Choice Specs moot. You should ultimately rely on items like Scope Lens or Muscle Band, as they do influence the damage and attack speed of your laser, including the split beams of Psybeam and Power Gem. Not to mention, the laser uses Sp. Atk to deal damage, so powering up the stat greatly increases the overall damage even further. As for battle items, X Attack also increases the attack speed and damage of all of your lasers, while X Speed increases your ability to chase enemies down. Because of the sheer range of your basic attack, items like Slow Smoke are not as effective for you as they do little to improve your matchups. Full Heal might be worth running to escape a hindrance, especially if you can anticipate it. Lastly, Fluffy Tail can help Starmie level up more reliably, especially if you’re running Surf to damage objectives like the Regi Trio.

Now, even if you are a master of kiting, do expect to get KOd a lot, as Starmie’s defenses are rather pitiful. On the flip side, if the enemy has a lot of frail Attackers and Speedsters, you’ll be reward with a 4 KO or even a 5 KO streak with smart positioning and kiting, especially if you have a reliable teammate distracting them for you. 

You’re a star, but you can only shine so bright with great costars by your side. Never forget that.

-

And that’s Starmie for Pokemon Unite! Fitting that I’d get this out 12 days before Christmas, and that’s NOT because I’ve been lazy. I’ve just...been having trouble getting the urge to write, is all. This happens, especially if I succumb to my disastrous sleep schedule. 

Anyway, enough of all that. Next up, we’ve got a Supporter coming. Hopefully I get this one out sooner than later. Thanks for reading!

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #200

Wow, what a milestone, huh? It feels like only yesterday we were building Mash. Didn't even know you could grab multiple fighting styles back then. We were also one person back then. Things change. Things change even faster when you have magic eyes that let you bend anything you can see, so let's hurry up and build Asagami Fujino already. She is a Quandrix Sorcerer to tear apart anything she lays eyes on, as well as expand her field of vision beyond what her eyes can see. Dangerous combination, that.

Check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Next up: In the dark of the night, evil will find you! (If Rasputin ever become a playable character I am really going to regret using that one here.)

Wait, what's that...

Race and Background

No surprises here, Fujino is a Variant Human, because normal humans can't tear people apart with their mind. That means she gets +1 Dexterity and Charisma, as well as proficiency with Perception (kind of her deal) and the Tough feat. HP isn't just how much body you have to get hurt, it's also how badly getting hurt affects you. Fujino's deadened sense of pain means she can take hits and keep going, purely due to the fact that she doesn't realize she should stop. That means you're getting an extra 2 HP each level.

Fujino is a schoolgirl, so the closest thing we have is the Cloistered Scholar background. That gives you History and Nature proficiency.

Ability Scores

Your highest score should be Charisma. Your magic eyes are an innate part of you, and it's really easy to be frightening when you can tear a bridge down around you. Second highest should be Constitution, for the reasons we outlined in your background feat. Your Dexterity should probably be pretty high, you fight in clothing, and you fought against Shiki for more than five seconds without dying. That's impressive. Your Intelligence isn't that bad, though you're still going through school. We aren't dumping Strength, it's alright, but we are dumping Wisdom. You have a hard time feeling yourself and feeling connected to other people.

Class Levels

You're a Sorcerer, giving you proficiency with Constitution and Charisma saves, as well as proficiency with the Intimidation and Arcana skills. You've got magic implanted in your face, and again, bridge. As a Sorcerer, you can cast spells using your Charisma. Blade Ward deadens your senses further, giving you resistance to physical damage types for a round. Mending lets you twist a small item back together, instead of tearing it apart. Sword Burst is a short range bending... sorta. Force damage is hard to quantify. But it's free, so that's nice. You can also Shape Water to bend liquids to your will. For first level spells, Mage Armor helps you not die, and Magic Missile lets you shoot little bursts of twistiness that'll never miss. You also join the school of Quandrix, which gives you the starting gift of the spells Guidance and Guiding Bolt. They aren't super in character, but they're free, so suck it up. More Importantly, you learn Functions of Probability, helping you bend luck in your favor. When you cast a leveled spell targeting a creature, you can add an effect to a nearby creature (yourself included). A Diminishing Function forces a wisdom save (DC 8 + Chr mod + proficiency), and if it fails it subtracts 1d6 from the next attack roll it makes this round. Turns out swordfighting is hard when your sword is a corkscrew. Alternatively, a Supplemental Function lets a creature add a d6 to an attack or save made in the next round. This part is less believable, but if you're creative I'm sure it'll look good.

Second level sorcerers are a Font of Magic, giving you sorcery points equal to your level per long rest. You can turn them into slots, or turn slots into points. Eventually you can do other things. Also, you can cast Thunderwave now. It destroys objects, you destroy objects, it's a match made in heaven.

Now that you're a third level sorcerer, you can make your spells truly your own thanks to Metamagic! If you cast a Heightened spell, one creature in its effect has disadvantage on their save against it. If you cast an Empowered spell, you can re-roll a couple damage dice. Tearing people in half is generally hard to avoid, and kind of damaging. You can also bend the air itself by casting Dust Devil, creating a Medium sized tornado, dealing damage to creatures nearby and pushing them around. It'll even pick up dust and make things hard to see, though that's kind of a drawback for you.

Use your very first Ability Score Improvement to bump up your Charisma. Kind of a spell-based build, to be honest. Speaking of, Mage Hand probably doesn't have much tearing force behind it, but it's free. You can also cast Shatter for more indiscriminate destruction.

Fifth level sorcerers gain third level spells like Clairvoyance! Now you can see a bird's eye view of the battlefield, tearing your way through it like, well, you.

At sixth level it's about time you started bending the earth to your will. You can Velocity Shift nearby creatures if they start their turn or move within 30' of you. If they fail a charisma save you can shove them to any other point within 30' of you. You can react this way 30' per long rest. Twist debris at people and watch them scatter, it's fun. To help with that, you can also cast Erupting Earth, bending the ground in a 20' cube. This forces dex saves on creatures in the cube, dealing damage and making the area difficult terrain until it's cleaned up.

Seventh level sorcerers get fourth level spells like Stoneskin for even more deadened senses. Now you resist physical damage without having to waste your action every turn. It does use your concentration, but it lasts an hour.

Another ASI! Max out your Charisma for super special eyes. You can also Control Water to create truly damaging whirlpools. There's other options, but whirlpools! Who'd want anything else?

Oh hey, I found something you might want else. It's fifth level spell Bigby's Hand! You can grab people and play with them like a stress ball. Technically there isn't a twisting option, but a Grasping Hand is probably the best you'll do. It'll grapple a huge or smaller creature, and if it successfully does so you can Crush it as a bonus action for damage.

Another Metamagic option! Technically these spells are all just you looking at things, so grab Subtle Spell so you don't have to yell out all your attack names. You can also Mold Earth. It's not that powerful, but it's free twisting. You also get Telekinesis! Again, no "twisting" in the rules, but it's strong enough to lift an object of 1000 pounds, and fine enough to open a door. Their heads should be popping off here.

Sixth level spells! Here are the big boys of the spell world. If you twist anything enough, eventually it'll Disintegrate, dealing plenty of force damage and leaving behind a mess you can't even revive. A little too clean for Fujino, but it's destructive enough.

ASI time. Bump up Constitution for a thicker skin and more HP. HP changes retroactively, so you get an extra 12 HP here.

Did you know turning into rotini is painful? Your enemies certainly know that, thanks to Power Word Pain. If a charmable creature has 100 HP or less, their speed drops to 10', and it gets disadvantage on all attacks, checks, and saves, aside from constitution saves. If it tries to cast a spell, it'll be wasted if it can't pass a constitution save. The target stays in pain forever until it can pass a constitution save.

Cool, so fun thing about these Multi Class Subclasses! As long as you're the correct level, you can take any one feature they have each time you hit the appropriate level in your main class. Since the highest requirement is 14, we're taking Quantum Tunneling now, and we'll pop back to the other one later. Your senses permanently deaden, giving you complete resistance to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage. You can also bend your way through any physical objects, as long as you're willing to deal with a halved movement speed and 1d10 damage each square you move. You also have to end your turn in an empty spot. Playing to character this should leave a huge hole behind you, but maybe you're conscientious? You weren't raised in a barn, after all.

Your eighth level spell is Earthquake. Now no structure in your view is safe from your destructive powers. Tear open the earth, shatter structures, and interrupt concentration, there's nothing you can't do!

Bump up your Dexterity this ASI. Not getting hit is still pretty useful, even if you can't feel it.

Remember when I said turning into rotini hurts? I was wrong. Actually, it kills you. Please grab Power Word Kill to reflect these changes. You have become death, destroyer of mages. You also learn how to cast Distant Spells, doubling your spell's range. Your range should be "anywhere in sight", so this is a step in the right direction.

Okay, I guess we'll grab Null Equation. Once per turn you can twist up a creature you damaged. If they fail a constitution save, they get disadvantage on strength and dexterity saves, and they only deal half damage with weapon attacks, all for a round. You can do this Proficiency times per long rest. Again, real hard to hit people when your femurs are spring shaped.

Use your last ASI for more Constitution for more HP and better concentration.

We've finally done it, we've made a pure sorcerer build! It's time to finally learn the dark secret of the Sorcerer capstone. What feature could be so powerful we've completely avoided it for 200 builds? It's Sorcerous Restoration. You get 4 sorcery points per short rest. It's not good. Sorry.

Pros and Cons

Pros:

You're good at dealing damage, and your most powerful spells deal Force damage, which almost nothing blocks against. That means you're consistent and deadly, a solid combination.

You're so good at damage that it isn't just limited to creatures. Use telekinesis, mold earth, and shatter to tear apart structures that are getting in your way. Walls? Torn down. Steel Beams? Melted. Bridges? Falling down.

Despite spending your entire time in a class with the worst hit dice imaginable, you're pretty tough to kill, with just over 200 HP, a decent AC for a spellcaster, and permanent resistance to physical damage types. To make things worse for fighters, it's also a pain to get near you, since you can tear up the area around you and shunt melee fighters away as a reaction.

Cons:

While you do have magic missile, a lot of your spells deal damage in wide areas, so your party might have words with you about using earthquake one too many times.

While you're good at tearing things up, that's just about all your magic can do. There's the occasional Clairvoyance and some defensive spells, but by and large you're either dealing damage or doing nothing.

Despite your great physical defense, you struggle a bit more against other damage types. If you end up fighting someone who can turn their knife into psychic damage, you might have a problem on your hands.

[rollychan]

Okay, turns out I have more to say about the first Loki series episode already.

But first a preface/disclaimer: 1) I welcome all opinions if they’re stated respectfully / without any insulting of or jibing at others or other groups of fans (I mean it, any “some fans *rollyeyes*” will get you a swift block and Idgaf which side you’re on, I have no time for that bullshit) 2) I am a mere unintelligent trashcan of a person and also my native language isn’t English so excuse me if my thoughts here aren’t deep or intelligent enough or thought through. They are my own, though. 3) These thoughts will NOT be very organized. I apologize in advance.

Thoughts under the cut.

The TVA and Dystopian Themes

The first point I’d like to make is that the first episode gives me major classic dystopian vibes just set in a very bureaucratic world. I will explain why:

1) The fact that Loki is arrested for time crimes he wasn’t even aware he is committing and that are decided on by some mysterious few authorities nobody ever seems to see.

Let me expand on this. It feels very much like it’s another powerful dictator-like power, like Big Brother from 1984, like the ten world leaders from Brave New World. They dictate how things should be. They decide on exactly the one timeline that they allow to exist and any variance from that is punishable by death. In 1984, you had the Thought Police and an arbitrarily chosen enemy you had to hate that changed from time to time and everyone had to follow those changes, in Brave New World, it’s a bit trickier, but basically, people were genetically modified (was it before birth? I can’t quite remember that well the details of it) and pre-determined to be in one of three (or four? it’s been years if not a decade+ since I last read the book) classes by deciding on their intelligence and other factors. Pre-determination, rigid behavioral rules, no straying from the decided upon social norms. That’s what they all have in common. Not to mention the brainwashing. “War is Peace / Freedom is Slavery / Ignorance is Strength” anyone? The TVA might as well get such a slogan for themselves. The people working for the TVA all seem very brainwashed. The guy at the desk that stowed away the Tesseract grew up behind the desk, for godssake, he doesn’t even know what a fish is. Just like people in Brave New World are brainwashed from their birth.

“A really efficient totalitarian state would be one in which the all-powerful executive of political bosses and their army of managers control a population of slaves who do not have to be coerced, because they love their servitude.” (Brave New World)

The TVA, like the people in the Brave New World, want there to be no conflict (forced happiness is the thing in BNW). They believe in what they do, and Mobius is actually very much a product of that. He believes he is doing the right thing. He believes that getting a Loki variant on his side will solve the problem the TVA are facing with the other Loki variant they are chasing. He will do anything for this goal, but he does have a different idea from the other characters we have met so far. They don’t think a Loki variant will help, but they are still all working towards the same goal.

And, I mean:

“You will be lifted clean out from the stream of history. We shall turn you into gas and pour you into the stratosphere. Nothing will remain of you; not a name in a register, not a memory in a living brain. You will be annihilated in the past as well as in the future. You will never have existed.” (1984)

I get major 1984 vibes here.

(I do think that Mobius might change his stance towards the TVA throughout the course of the series and I think he’s an interesting character to follow. But in the beginning, he’s still wholly entrenched. Him having a different opinion from the rest of the TVA does look like some foreshadowing though.

I have seen some people say the TVA is framed positively, which I respect as their opinion, but I don’t agree. I have seen nothing that cements in stone they’re the good guys here (there are some scenes I view as neutral and Mobius’ introduction I view as framing him as not totally evil, not the whole TVA as good). If anything, I get the feeling they are very powerful dictators and Loki caved because he realized how powerless he truly is there. But I guess that could be just me.)

2) Nothing is explained to Loki. There is no instance that acts in Loki’s defense. In fact, from what we have seen, there is usually no way anyone accused of time crimes can influence the court verdict. It is entirely one-sided and pre-determined unless someone from the TVA wants them alive.

Like, that is a major indicator of something being very very fishy here. No one who has a shred of morality will think that is just. Everyone accused of a crime has the right to a fair process, to a defense, to an appeal. Nothing about this process is fair. Everything about this process screams dystopia to me.

Loki isn’t even treated with dignity like every fucking criminal still has a right to in democratic countries. Getting the clothes lasered off without a warning? Would be a major human rights violation. Getting dragged left and right and dropped through floors? Major human rights violation.

This is, partly, played for laughs, but also not entirely. Loki does realize how little power he holds in that place and that moment is played seriously. It’s dictatorian, it’s unjust, it’s rigid.

3) People are arbitrarily erased / killed (”reset” is the term they use, I believe? When they use those glowsticks?)

For things like refusing to take a ticket and then having no ticket. When nothing is explained to them before.

The court process is a joke. It’s a farce, they go through some (not even all) standard motions of court preceedings but there is 0 chance for the accused to win. It’s all an illusion, as Loki so correctly points out. Nobody questions it but him, but it very much is all an illusion, a mask for the dictatorship underneath.

I’m, like, 80% sure the ticket bs is there so they don’t have to deal with everyone and can get rid of the annoying variants before they ever reach the “court”.

Basically, I think the TVA are supposed to be dystopian. It fits right in. (There is so much more in my brain but currently I lack the words to express it)

Loki and Continuity

The first half of the episode feels very over-the-top. There is so much over-acting going on with Tom Hiddleston that I don’t understand. He feels incredibly OOC in that first half (save for a couple moments, perhaps). The panicky fumbling for the ticket after he saw another variant being “erased”? That’s so much NOT Loki it’s not funny. I can overlook the thing about signing the papers that are supposed to be “everything he ever said” but some things are so OOC they are not even in the same universe as Loki’s original characterisation (of the T1 & Avengers 1 Loki) is anymore. That ticket fumbling moment, for example.

They did go over basically all his life in that scene with Mobius (though Mobius was absent for a bunch of it). Those emotional moments were raw and IC, in my opinion (the way he reacts to his own death - btw, anyone reading this before watching the episode: they show the IW death scene and while the moment he dies happens while the camera shows Loki’s reaction to it, you can still hear the audio of it, so beware!) I think that moment he breaks down is well-done. And it’s in that vulnerable state that Mobius finds him and gives him the final manipulative push to tell Mobius what Mobius wants to hear.

If they pick up on these themes - the dystopian dictatorship that the TVA are in reality and Loki having to come to terms with never being able to turn back and freedom vs. determinism (chaos vs. rigid order?), it can turn out to be a decent show.

I have way more thoughts but I’ve already spent way too much time on this so here you go.

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

I don’t need you to love me, I love me

I’m gonna miss writing about Pearl.

As the loneliest Crystal Gem, a loyal servant who became a fierce ally, then a spurned lover, then a grieving survivor, Pearl’s story is about discovering who she can be on her own terms. Like Steven, she believes that her value comes from being valued, but unlike Steven, she was literally programmed this way and has an even harder time breaking loose, so she starts off at the toxic level of selfish selflessness that threatens to consume him, directed towards someone who’s been dead for years. She defines herself by her relationships, but struggles with all of them because she only understands a dynamic where one person is superior and the other is inferior; as such, her life is an endless evaluation of whether she’s worse or better than the people around her, thus whether she should be deferential or condescending. Her problem goes beyond not knowing how to develop loving relationships with equals: she doesn’t know how to love herself.

But she changes her mind.

“We need to talk about us.”

The first act of Change Your Mind (which lines up nicely with its first quarter) sets the stage with Blue and Yellow both converting to Steven’s cause, and while compelling, it’s appropriately intense. That intensity gets even higher as the episode continues, but this is still a big finale, so it’s about damn time for some fanservice.

After a quick “go to your rooms” to reinforce that White Diamond is the Diamonds’ mother more than their older sister, Connie gets the body part pun train rolling: “face-off” will soon be followed by “did you have a hand in this?” and “lend me a hand” (which earns a chuckle from Blue), Pink’s legs succumb when Steven takes a knee, and getting into White’s head becomes the primary goal of the second act (so all of this second quarter and most of the third). Still, the levity seems fleeting before two glints in the sky bring us the one-two punch of Bismuth leading the charge and Lapis and Peridot showing off their threads.

Bismuth fits right in as the leader of the B-Team, as beyond her seniority she’s clearly more competent at running a show than the other two (see: The New Crystal Gems). But her reverse electric guitar soon cedes to a glorious harmony of Lapis and Peridot’s themes as we see their new forms: Lapis gets pants and sandals, and Peridot gets ridiculous shades and a trashcan lid, the perfect adaptation of Static’s saucer for the Crystal Gems’ resident raccoon. Peridot goes ham with three stars, while Lapis wears a subtle dark blue variant that includes all five points if we count her legs. For a moment, everything is right in the world.

Their timing couldn’t be better, and not just because we need some stress relief. Steven begins the finale with one friend on his side, then he gets two Diamonds on his side, and now he has three reinforcements on his side, and this growing group of allies all represent what the Big Three Crystal Gems can’t: the family that Steven has chosen, rather than the family he grew up with. These relationships are all a result of his effort, whether going out of his way to befriend Connie or winning over the five former enemies that now stand at his side, and together they‘re one huge reminder that you can reach people if they’re willing to be reached. White Diamond isn’t a villain because she’s cruel, she’s a villain because she quashes any effort to change her mind.

Furthermore, seeing Lapis and Peridot  in particular next to a pale, prejudiced, recently-discovered member of Steven’s extended family who disagrees with a parent’s name change evokes that other long episode where Steven went out on a limb to change someone’s mind, and the comparison does wonders for putting White Diamond’s bigotry in perspective.

I’ve already made my defense of Andy, but in short, his irritable first impression masks how open-minded he ends up being. Sure, he has some lousy beliefs, but he’s willing to sit down with folks he disagrees with and try and look for ways to either compromise or straight-up be convinced that those beliefs might be wrong. On its own, Gem Harvest could be read as a little too hopeful, especially as it came out weeks after the 2016 election gave proud bigots the White House, but next to Change Your Mind it expands on the finale’s message: keep an open heart and mind, because people can surprise you if you give them a chance, but don’t let yourself be a doormat in the process.

White Diamond would never have come to the Crystal Gems’ table. She still hasn’t even shown up in person since Legs From Here to Homeworld, using a warped version of the same delegation Steven practices in his talks with the Diamonds: he helps others bring their individual experiences to light, showing that his position isn’t unique, while she blots out their individuality and replaces them with her. Blue and Yellow’s contrast has been a plot point for far longer, but Pink and White (and now Steven and White) are an even starker pair of foils, divided not only by personality but by size and age.

Knowing how hard it will be to reach White, Yellow and Blue again suggest that Steven and the Crystal Gems bail, offering their own ships now that Pink’s is unavailable. While this shows how profoundly they believe in him, it again reveals how unfamiliar these two are with being “good.” Beyond the plan only delaying the inevitable (White Diamond for sure could send more troops to Earth in this scenario), Steven points out that his mother failed in both of her identities to confront the problem in a healthy way, and continuing to avoid it will mean it never gets solved. Rose is still a progression from Pink and Yellow and Blue, as fighting for your beliefs addresses the issue more directly than running away, but Steven in turn is a progression from Rose.

Then Connie’s opening words in Blue and Yellow’s conversions pay off. This time she’s the one ending the conversation, and she’s gained enough of their attention that they don’t write her off as a blathering human. Steven never got to meet Rose, rank-and-file Gems don’t have parents, and White Diamond seems to be the root of it all, so Connie is the ideal voice to reach the Diamond Sisters: she’s the only other person on the planet with a living mother. Where Dr. Maheswaran at her worst once stood in for Yellow Diamond, she can now represent the bigger fish, both in her similar brand of maternal tyranny and in the hope that her attitude can change after a good talk.

And just as Connie takes over Steven’s role as the big finisher for Blue and Yellow, Steven takes over Connie’s role as the voice introducing bigger voices now that it’s time to face White. He works with his aunts to bring his grandmother to a standstill—not by beating her statue-like ship into submission, but by joining the arm-ships to the body and completing the picture—and says his piece briefly before ceding the floor to a pair that White has victimized for far longer than the past week or so.

I love that Yellow is the first to speak, flipping the Diamonds’ conversion order and subverting the notion that the more emotionally open Blue might take the lead. This isn’t just a matter of clarity, but bravery, and Yellow has always been the more confrontational of the pair. It’s also that much more impactful to see Yellow push past her fear and allow herself to be vulnerable, given how hard she’s worked to maintain her air of stoicism. Patti LuPone’s raw power has served the character well, and she keeps up the same petulant energy that saw Yellow dishing about White in Familiar, but now she funnels all of it into a stirring argument against the exacting nature of Homeworld society. And because Yellow helps pave the way, Blue can deepen their point by defending Pink’s role in the quartet and detailing how White’s orders have caused the whole family to suffer.

Steven bookends the Diamonds by suggesting that White can start helping everyone by helping her daughters. Then White shows what kind of “help” she’s willing to provide.

Pink’s former pearl was already proof that White Diamond has the power to possess others, but it’s another thing to see it in action. The whole episode so far has been about building up hope again after Steven is knocked down by Homeworld, but all it takes is one agonizing glare to send everything backwards. Blue and Yellow are even worse off than they were before, and as they’re brought into White’s fold, their arms follow suit. White drops the Crystal Gems and lets them fall, then Steven drops the Crystal Gems and dives after them.

As he slides down alien architecture on his shield, the soundtrack gives a nod to the theme song to prepare us for more fanservice. Now that White has made it clear that talking isn’t going to get us anywhere, it’s time for more action. Now that we’ve established the importance of Steven’s chosen family, it’s time to reconnect with the family he was born into.

Amethyst is first, because of course she is. She’s usually the quickest to reform, and she’s the only Gem that Steven has fused with, so Smoky Quartz is the best start if the goal is reeling off three fusions in a row with a growing sense of excitement. Smoky’s theme heralds this new development with glee, evoking the pure joy of seeing a new fusion from Earthlings as it becomes clear what the show is doing. Fusion has recently featured as a stand-in for marriage and an act of rebellion, but now it represents familial love, and doubles as an elegant plot device to get the poofed crew back in action. The wonder of fusion has always been that beyond whatever metaphor it currently serves, it’s also just a really neat piece of magic that lends itself to awesome visuals, and this whole sequence revels in the glorious spectacle.

Pearl is second, because we’ve already seen another version of Rainbow Quartz, so the biggest reveal is bound to be the Garnet fusion. Rainbow Quartz 2.0 blends the old with the new, immediately showing off the latest clever fusion of weapons (a shield and a spear into a parasol) and introducing a blue jacket that will soon belong to Pearl. The drumkit/chiptune mashup of Smoky’s theme is replaced by a piano/chiptune mashup, and then this new fusion opens their mouth.

Of all of Steven’s fusions with a female or female-presenting partner, this is the one with a male voice actor, and it couldn’t be more perfect. Rainbow Quartz was the only one of Rose’s fusions that we saw, and Now We’re Only Falling Apart shows that she was the second-ever cross-Gem fusion after Garnet (that we know of), so she was clearly something special. Pearl’s romantic interest in Rose complicates matters further, as Rainbow Quartz is an embodiment of a deeply imperfect relationship. This is a character with a lot of baggage, but casting Alastair James puts a hard stop to the idea that this is the same Rainbow Quartz, even before we hear them refer to themself as “2.0.” After the literal nightmare that begins Change Your Mind and the figurative nightmare to come, it’s wonderful to have one more piece of evidence that Steven and Rose are different people.

Amethyst and Pearl, like Lapis and Peridot, get great new looks, and they’ll soon be followed by Garnet (after the commercial break). If this was just for the sake of fanservice, it’d be more than enough: it’s always fun to get outfit changes, and between that and the fusions (including Sunstone and Obsidian; again, after the commercial break!) we get a pleasant treat to sate us between the drama. But as always, the show finds a way to create deeper meaning in the magic.

The Diamonds look the same now as they did thousands of years ago, and one of the reasons why is that they’re unbreakable. Creating a new form requires poofing, which is a very silly way to say that the Crystal Gems have found a way to grow through pain.

Life will always have its share of pain. Part of growing up, maybe the biggest part, is figuring out what you’re going to do about it. The Diamonds react to pain by closing themselves off and letting their problems fester rather than addressing them head-on. But over the course of the series, Lapis and Peridot and Amethyst and Pearl and Garnet have put in the work to learn from their pain and heal, and because they’re literal projections of their true selves, they get a physical manifestation of that growth that can only come after weathering one more blow.

To be clear, pain itself shouldn’t be glamorized. It sucks, and it’s okay if your reaction is to take care of yourself rather than use it for Creative Fuel. But the Crystal Gems are what happens when you deal with your pain, and the Diamonds are what happens when you don’t. And because Steven shares the legacy of both, Steven Universe is about him helping others through their pain and Steven Universe Future is about finally confronting his own.

We end with the most frustrating commercial break of the three, coming right in the middle of the second act, so we’ll just keep on going with fusions and new outfits next time. But if we have to stop partway through a scene, at least we get a Monty Python Foot to stamp out the first half of Change Your Mind.

I Can’t Believe We’ve Come So Far

Hilary Florido is the only storyboarder with their own recurring segment in Steven, Universally. But every other storyboarder had plenty of opportunities to make a fully realized High School AU in their promo art, and none of them did, so that’s on them.

Florido is obviously more than her promo art, but it speaks to a specific level of nerdy passion that made her and longtime coboarder Jesse Zuke so dang good at Peridot episodes, starting with just their second collaboration, the iconic Catch and Release. From there they gave us Too Far and Log Date 7 15 2 and Barn Mates and Too Short to Ride and Beta and Gem Harvest, and Florido kept the ride going with Raising the Barn. Peridot would not be Peridot without Hilary Florido.

In terms of more serious clods, Florido is the only person to board all three Kevin appearances (Alone Together with Rebecca Sugar and first regular coboarder Katie Mitroff, Beach City Drift with Zuke, and Kevin Party with final regular coboarder Danny Cragg, who also stopped boarding after the movie). She gave us as Ronaldo at his worst in Rocknaldo and Aquamarine at her worst in I Am My Mom. And as if she needed further proof of her prowess with harrowing material, she gave us Alone at Sea and A Single Pale Rose.

It’s weird to attribute good Steven writing to any one boarder, given he’s in every episode but Jungle Moon and he’s generally pretty great, but Florido worked on some of the most important moments of Steven letting us into his deeper thoughts: she’s behind him getting real with the Cool Kids in Joy Ride, with Amethyst in Steven vs. Amethyst, and with himself in a rare monologue in Lion 4. His ability to discuss the uncomfortable subtext of Mystery Girl’s visual similarity to Rose is key to the magnificent tone of Last One Out of Beach City, and his introspection about his mother’s older identity is just as important to Familiar.

In short, Hilary Florido rocked at characters with rough edges, whether it was Peridot’s ornery id, a bevy of outright villains ruining everyone’s day, normally sympathetic characters doing dubious things, or Steven giving himself enough of a break to complain. She stepped up as a storyboard supervisor for Steven Universe Future, but even if she hadn’t, her legacy would be secure.

(Frankly it’d be secure even if the only thing she gave us was this.)

[savior-of-humanity]

OKAY here are my Thoughts(tm) about The Ancient Gods part II

ALSO: MASSIVE FUCKING SPOILER WARNING FOR THE ANCIENT GODS PART 1 + 2. BE WARNED THIS IS LONG AS FUCK. TL;DR AT BOTTOM.

In terms of the gameplay: I really liked how it played! The combat encounters weren’t downright vicious like in the first DLC, but they still go out of their way to mix things up (i.e a hallway filled with explosive barrels + blood punch pick-ups + Pinkies, or the double-Marauder encounter that you could ACCIDENTALLY FUCKING BUFF JESUS CHRIST) so it was still fun all around.

The new enemies added - the Cyber-Baron/Armored Baron, Riot Zombie/Chaingunner, Screecher Zombie, Stone Imp, and Cursed Prowler - are...okay. I like the idea of new enemy variants based off pre-existing ones but they felt either really fucking frustrating to fight (particularly the Cursed Prowler and Chaingunner) or were very “simple”, I guess. The Stone Imps, in particular, are a variant of Imp that are very resistant to damage unless you use the full-auto mod for the shotgun, in which they drop even more shotgun ammo if they’re killed by that. Other than that they do a Sonic-style spin-dash and slam into you, which can actually knock you off a ledge. Screecher Zombies are basically just mobile hazards that if you accidentally hit, will act like temporary Buff Totems. Cursed Prowler is fucking awful: basically, if it hits you with a projectile, you’ll be cursed with a debuff that keeps you from double-jumping and dashing that also drains your health over time, and you HAVE to kill it with a blood punch in order to remove the curse. Chaingunners are basically just the Shield Zombie Soldiers, but they shoot faster and have an indestructable shield. And finally, the Cyber-Baron: It’s basically a Baron of Hell, but with indestructable armor that can only be destroyed by shooting it’s mace when it flashes green, or by shooting it with plasma. After the armor is gone you have to kill it as fast as you can before the armor is regenerated, repeat until it dies.

Summoner Ghosts and Blood Maykrs also make a return, which is cool.

The Hammer is cool to say the least. I was hoping to see some glory kills with it but considering that it’s primary use is to either clear out groups of small enemies or to stun larger ones like Barons, it makes sense that they’d omit glory kills from it. On top of that, Marauders now have a mechanic (for the entire game, not just the DLC) where when you shoot them as they flash green, they’ll become stunned (though the sound effects are rather corny and cartoonish, even for the game). Using the Hammer on a stunned Marauder will GREATLY extend that stun, which allows you to just fucking shit on them.

I also really liked the grapple-Hookshot points that you had to use to progress in a level. I’m still not really used to how you’re supposed to move in the opposite direction of the point to swing yourself, but the idea is intuitive, fun, and makes me wish it was in the base game and the previous DLC.

My biggest grievances with this DLC, however, is how it handled some of it’s characters, the story, and the new lore that was implemented in the codexes.

So first off: I want to say that while I still appreciate the DLC, that’s honestly only with the gameplay. The story, much less the lore, is fucking stupid to say the least.

To TL;DR the story: It is, quite honestly, bare-bones as fuck. We continue from where we directly left off from the Ancient Gods Part 1: Davoth/The Dark Lord is being summoned into existence and into his physical form, which for some reason looks exactly like Doomguy except with sick tats, glowing red eyes, and a weird implant in his chest. Doomguy, naturally, tries to spawncamp him and shoots him with his super-shotgun, but nothing happens as “no blood can be spilled in this holy place”. Davoth leaves, telling Doomguy that he’ll be waiting for him in the city of Immora, the capitol city at the very center of Hell.

Doomguy goes to Argent D’Nur. He murder-death-kills shit, as per usual. He goes into this big castle where a hologram of Valen is waiting for him. He tells him that he atones for his sins and gives him the Hammer since Doomguy lifted the curse from his son’s soul. He goes to the Torch of Kings and lights it, marking his journey to the giant crystalline spear that impales Argent D’Nur known as the World Spear. Cue cutscene of a bunch of different Argenta people/Night Sentinel seeing the light of the Torch of Kings from all over Argent D’Nur. Internguy tells him that it’s a day’s walk still from the World Spear, and conveniently a very fucking awesome looking Argenta dragon shows up and gives him a ride to the World Spear.

Doomguy gets to a lake that separates him from the World Spear. The Father says “He is worthy” and then a bridge rises out of the water. Doomguy crosses past some big ass Sentinel ghosts/guardians and into the World Spear. Turns out the inside of the World Spear is like some giant, fucked up ship made out of crystal, with weird figures lining the wall and all that: Internguy even says “This isn’t a crystal at all, this is a ship!” This does not get expanded upon whatsoever in neither dialogue or codexes. Doomguy grabs Convenient Power Crystal and leaves.

Doomguy arrives on Earth through a portal, which is looking substantially better than since its invasion. Internguy tells him that a Convenient Ancient Portal close by is the only way to Immora. Doomguy kills shit, arrives at portal, activates it with Convenient Power Crystal, and leaves.

Doomguy arrives in front of a giant wall surrounding Immora. Davoth walks out, wearing a big ass power suit that looks like something straight out of Warhammer 40k. He’s surrounded by guards in cool red armor with cool spears that look very humanoid. He says some shit and a bunch of Hell-ships and demons and titans start showing up. But then surprise! A bunch of portals open up on Doomguy’s side like it’s fucking Infinity War/Endgame all over again and a fuckload of Sentinels start coming out, with mechs and dragons and spaceships. Valen is there. Doomguy and Valen stare at each other for like 5 seconds before Valen says “Let Hell tremble before our might!” or some shit like that. Doomguy fights, gets past the wall, fights some more inside the city. Again, the usual.

I also want to briefly point out that Immora is basically just a Maykr city but red, and that it’s apparently “Hell’s own technology.” Also, the red dudes in armor are actual enemies but the guns they have (the hell-razor from 2016) do piss-poor damage and they die if you so much as breathe on them.

Doomguy finally catches up to Davoth. Davoth monologues about how he’s going to get his revenge and that it’s inevitable, bla bla bla. Fight begins. It’s basically Marauder 2.0 but if he hits you and/or you shoot him at the wrong time he heals a fuckload of health. And also 5 different health bars. After you knock down 2 or 3 of his bars he stops the fight to monologue for some fucking reason? And then shits out a plot twist that surprise, he’s actually the real God, and that the Father betrayed/usurped his power, and that he will “unmake everything by his hand.” Fight resumes. Doomguy eventually beats him. Davoth asks him if he has anything to say before he strikes down his creator. Doomguy takes off his helmet, stabs Davoth in the heart, and says no in his stupid sexy voice. Davoth dies, his life-sphere emerges and then explodes. Doomguy suddenly becomes weak and falls over. The Father says “He created everything in his image, even you.” Doomguy passes out and wakes up to see 3 Seraphim seal him in a sarcophagus like the one from 2016. Fade to black, with the quote “May the blood on your sword never dry, and may we never need you again.” End game, roll credits.

If you hadn’t read any of the codexes while playing the DLC, the story probably makes little to no sense to you whatsoever. But honestly the codexes don’t expand upon things much and, if anything, just fucking make some aspects of the story even more stupid.

The World Spear is implied in the codex that it contains live Wraiths (“A live Wraith has not been seen in centuries, but rumors persist that some yet remain inside the World Spear itself.”), and while the figures in the World Spear could be Wraiths, absolutely nothing is said about them out of three Codexes related to the level, which honestly just makes me wonder the point of adding this stuff if you don’t even give a single sentence of why the interior of the World Spear is Like That.

The codex entries related to Earth are basically uninteresting as they’re pretty much just “humanity is rebuilding and views doomguy as a hero”. There is one about the Convenient Ancient Portal (Gate of Divum) but all it really says is that it was built and used by the Father to access Immora. Nothing about why it’s on Earth, or anything interesting like that.

However, the real bullshit comes in when we start to look at the codex entries related to Immora and Davoth.

So, Immora is the central - and oldest - city in Hell. It’s described as such: “Once a paradise at the dawn of creation, Immora now survives as a stronghold where the Dark Lord resides. Sustained now by the essence of Hell's victims, the people of Immora experience life eternal. Regular infusions of Hell energy have prevented them from transforming into the demons found outside the boundaries of the city. Ancient technology defends Immora from invaders, the high walls impenetrable to those who would bring harm to the last people of the first world.“

Yeah. So not only did Hell have high-tech technology all this time, but also the red guys in armor? Those are Immorans. Which is weird to me, because if Hell had this super advanced technology that’s also ancient, and thus around for a long time, why the hell are we only seeing it now?

Also, surprise! Turns out the Book of Seraphs is a complete fucking lie according to the very first codex entry related to Davoth! (”Our research shows that Maykr history and lore holds truths that are not consistent with passages found in the Hell Priest texts, revealing the true origins of Hell and all surrounding dimensions. This revelation would explain why Hell is the single dimension that connects to all others, and why it is the oldest in existence - the first world.”)

The real truth is that Davoth is the real Creator/God, and that Jekkad was the very first realm, not Urdak. He still sought immortality for his people, so he created the Maykrs to figure it out for him. They did, but decided it would be too dangerous to give Davoth that information, so they basically said “fuck you” and sealed Jekkad/Davoth while re-writing their own records to hide the truth. Obviously, this pissed off Davoth. So much so that he basically became super angry and emo and became the Dark Lord from all the vengeance and hatred (which also turned Jekkad into Hell.)

Another surprise! Turns out that Davoth had a hand in the creation of the fucking Doom Slayer! Because he wanted to get revenge against the Maykrs, he started to manipulate a bunch of people while he was trapped as a life sphere I guess. He started with the Khan Maykr, convincing her that there was a “chosen one” who would threaten her rule and thus making her paranoid as fuck. He then guided her into creating the Divinity Machine using a fragment of himself that had been sealed in Urdak. Then he manipulated Samur, by convincing him that “the Khan Maykr will lead us all to ruin.” He was then controlled and compelled to release a stranger from his prison (Doomguy) and empower him using the Divinity Machine.

As you can probably guess, he got his revenge since Doomguy would go on to utterly fuck Urdak/the Khan Maykr (as well as Samur), and ever since he knew that his “Beast” would come for him.

Listen. I don’t really mind the idea of Doomguy being used or even manipulated by different godly powers. Or even Davoth being the real God or whatever. But this new lore and story just feels... really sloppy and poorly executed, especially since it directly conflicts with the fucking base game. If he manipulated the Khan Maykr and wanted revenge against her, then why did he scream “NOOOOOO!” when Doomguy killed her?

And, if anything: Why the fuck does Davoth even look like Doomguy in the first place? Is it some form of mockery? Or did id just decide to fucking retcon the Doom Slayer being the same person as the Doomguy from Doom 1/2 with the Father’s line of “He created everything in his image -- even you.”

And, on top of that, the DLC just left more open questions than answers: what the fuck happened to Samur, since he isn’t even so much as mentioned beyond the codexes? Who is the Wretch, the being who had supposedly forged Doomguy’s armor back in 2016? What is the fate of Earth/Hell/Urdak/Argent D’Nur after the Slayer’s victory? What the fuck happened to the Demonic Crucible, the one from 2016? What about the ARC Carrier and the Fortress of Doom?

Finally, Valen, Internguy and the Father should’ve been far more involved in the story beyond just being either convenient voices telling you convenient stuff or (in the case of Valen) being a convenient guy to give you convenient weapon that also conveniently shows up with a giant army that doesn’t actually do anything but look cool in the skybox.

TL;DR The new lore and story of the DLC is basically garbage, and since I highly doubt id will change it I’m going to completely disregard it, write my own, and also take up Davoth as a muse because it seriously pissed me off that much.