#like... fiction. but just in case
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Cricket Cat concept. Do you see it? Do you see my vision? I don't think they'd purr or meow, just chirp with their wings.
#creature design#bug art#my art#i've been trying to CAPTURE WHAT I WANT in multiple sketchbook pages#i liked how these turned out#there may be an alternate version with the mandibles ... but i figured most people wouldn't find it charming like i would haha#it was interesting trying to imagine how those grasshopper like legs could be used in a cat like walking pattern#i love black cats and i love black crickets....#bugs#insect#it's a fictional bug of course but i'm tagging it just in case
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heartbreak
#fallen hero#fallen hero rebirth#fhr heartbreak#heartbreak#interactive fiction#choice of games#fhr#art#the heartbreak incident#idk what to tag this as... whatever#*25#mine#this was interesting to do bc of like. the clashing vibes of the hb incident#like it all happened on a clear and sunny day. in an office building downtown. and it wasnt even a 'visible incident' like the nanosurge#like it was just a clear and sunny day and people were suddenly overcome w/ despair and killed themselves. how relatable#cw gif#in case youre on mobile bc this one's almost 10mb....
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left to its own devices, the natural tendency of any fictional universe is to develop towards chaos. and bisexuality
#bolo speaks#reading more about dc continuity and its reboots/crises/offshoots and. mama mia.#I think it's a natural side effect of letting a succession of writers play in the same fictional sandbox for decades that the lore gets#unimaginably complicated. and often in very obtuse ways.#on the other hand it's also true that the longer a story runs the more likely a character is to come off as queer#in one continuity or another. just statistically. which fans notice and is then Absorbed into the public consciousness.#many such cases
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what to do about aubrey's hair...? (catholic school au)
#ngl i am having too much fun doodling these comics even if they are scribbly fgjhgjkf#ik if she were at a realistic catholic school she wouldn't be able to wear her hair and piercings like that#but this is a fictional au where i am in control and i happen to like her pink hair!!! so there!!!#omori#aubrey omori#kel omori#basil omori#sunny omori#sunburn omori#(<- tagging this just in case it could be perceived that way)#omori au#fan art#comic#becki draws stuff n stuff
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i'm kind of late to this but i just finished reading the scholomance trilogy by naomi novik and i feel like it is such an underrated urban fantasy?? taking the chosen one trope and turning it on its head with a fmc who has been prophesied to bring death and destruction, who is imbued with terrible power, but cannot even properly use said power to solve any of her obstacles because it would obliterate them and her soul. it takes a tired trope and the idea of an 'overpowered mary sue' and throws it back in your face by showing how all the power and destiny in the world is useless against a system filled with corruption that has burdened you with an easy way out (evil/destructive magic) that you can't take so now you have to work twice as hard as everyone else just to do simple, constructive spells instead of flicking your wrist and being done with it.
#the scholomance#naomi novik#galadriel higgins#orion lake#bookblr#urban fantasy#a deadly education#the last graduate#ya fantasy#the golden enclave#ya fiction#it has a diverse cast#queerness just effortlessly woven in#and the entire thing is so seamlessly crafted with a narrative on what real change looks like#how to really rid your environment of corruption and change society for the better you have to do the gritty work#you have to be willing to do the unpleasant hard grueling organization and working with people / meeting them where they're at#you might not even get to see or do the pretty parts#but its still worth doing the distatesful shit#doing the compromising and giving space for people to learn and make up for mistakes#so that future generations can do better#and have the childhood u didn't#no spoilers in case by some miracle i convince another soul to read this but like#she legit fucking says it in the book#it's not the work she wants to do in the end. not what she envisioned. but she does what she must to make sure other kids don't suffer#makes me think of climate activism so much#we might not get to have the pretty wonderful utopia but we have to be willing to do the shitty stuff it takes to make that future possible
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Frozen giant in the woods...
(ID in ALT text)
#robot#robots#scenery#forest#winter#snow#snowy forest#winter forest#giant robot#scifi#science fiction#original#hiker#idk what else to put#anyways i was really bummed out last night so. i grabbed a bunch of refs and just started painting it out. and i made this#i like how it turned out but mannn i'm still feeling bummed out.#eye strain#just in case
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It's so funny to me how determined the series is to pretend Hiccup hasn't killed people/isn't capable of killing people when necessary.
They act like he wasn't out there every day of the week burning and sinking dragon hunter ships with his friends in rtte. He just seems to be very stuck in the mindset of: 'if I don't see the bodies, then who's to say I've done something as morally reprehensible as murder?'
Like he literally caused multiple of Krogan's henchmen to be electrocuted at once and fall off their dragons but he didn't actually see their bodies hit the water so it's fine.
But he can't directly kill someone. He struggles when it's not some faceless soldier, and he has to look at or speak to them knowing he needs to take their life.
Unless Toothless or Astrid are in immediate danger. Then all reservations about killing and violence disappear (rightfully so).
#i love him#he probably tries his best to compartmentalize but that never really works so he like cries himself to sleep while hugging toothless or smt#because it suddenly sets in how violent some of his actions were despite how necessary they were at the time#hes so silly like that#httyd#httyd rtte#rtte#race to the edge#hiccup horrendous haddock iii#hiccup haddock#fictional death#tagging that just in case#moth.txt#deyas dragons
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it's me i'm the hypothetical guy this site gets mad at every 3 weeks (who's implied to be aro and/or ace) who dislikes [insert popular ship here] and wants them to be Just Friends. every time u complain i rub my grimy little hands all over another popular ship and make them platonic and nonsexual. they can't kiss or fuck anymore not ever again. they live long joyful and fulfilling lives just, like, without dating each other. next time it'll be a gay ship too so watch out
#text#this just does not happen with the frequency people seem to think it does?#like... 'let people be friends' is not really a take i see outside of people making fun of it 😭#always with an undertone of making fun of aros and aces too. many such cases!#& i mentioned gay people before anyone else can bc apparently 'people only say this about gay couples' Brother you cannot imagine#the fictional heterosexual couples ive divorced in my beautiful mind#I already forgot what prompted this. aaaand post!
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Get Ready for the Traffic Shipping Tournament of 2025!!!!!
It is time to vote for your favourite ships again!!!
The top 32 ships from the 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series fandom on ao3 was chosen to take part in this tournament (The stats of which you can see here)
However unlike last years match placements, which were random, this year we're giving everyone an opponent of their size by placing them in pairs by their order (Basically: 1 with 2, 3 with 4, 5 with 6,... so on and so on)
Every round of polls will last a week
Finally and most importantly, be kind to each other. This is just a silly tournament
Tags for easy navigation:
The actual match polls -> Polls
If you want support your ship by more than just voting, you can make your own propaganda posts and ask me to reblog them (with the link to the posts) or send me your propaganda in the asks to share for you! Propaganda could be anything from stellar art to incoherent yelling about your faves to bribing -> Tournament Propaganda
Fun stats about the polls for those who enjoy them! -> Tournament Stats
#trafficshipping#traffic shipping#trafficblr#Also copy pasting last years tags here as a reminder that#i don't know if this needs to be said but: all of these ships are of the fictional characters not ccs#another thing that i don't know if needs to be said is: do not tag ccs about the polls. your purpose does not matter. don't bother them#if a cc finds this on their own and wants to engage with it that's fine they can do whatever they want#not that i think this tournament will get big enough for that to happen anyway but i am simply prewarning just in case#this is just a silly tournament about block people ships i've decided to make so we can all have some fun as a fandom#so just remember to be nice to other people and their ships. if you see one you don't like simply root for your own ship harder#also if you do not like this blog or tournament simply blocking this blog will be better for us all
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I can't find it now but there's a post about suspension of disbelief and how it's broken when the story starts trying to excuse it. "character gets knocked unconscious for hours but there's no further issues from this" okay 👍 "and actually this makes perfect sense because of this and that" um no it doesn't why are you lying to me. like i am willing to ignore the holes and the discrepancies!! all you need to do is let me and not bring unnecessary attention to it!!!
and all that is my issue with the whole robin child soldier argument. like i am willing to ignore it i am willing to engage with the fantasy literally all you need to do is NOT try to convince me that Actually It's Fine Because They Want To Do It or whatever. like literally just shut up about it and i can engage with the fantasy!!
#my dc posting#dc#robin#batman#like. if you want to tell a story and not worry abt the child endangerement thing just DONT BRING IT UP ???#all you're doing when you bring it up is telling me this is something i'm allowed to think abt when it comes to the story#and then you tell me Um Actually It's Fine ?? no! what the fuck are you talking about!!#i am tryinggggg to just have fun n read fics your lil “isnt that child endangerement and kinda fucked up?” “no actually they wouldve done i#anyways bla bla bla batman couldnt have stopped them bla bla bla''#is COUNTERPRODUCTIVEEE#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#<- tagging the robins sorry#sorry this just. this topic annoys me so much#...also ''batman couldnt have stopped them/they wouldve done it with or without him'' are literally#just factually incorrect in jason's case. he did not in fact start on his own and the only thing batman wouldve#needed to do to stop him is literally just NOT make him robin BUT- at this point im just beating a dead horse on that topic#w how many times i bring it up lmao#like. in real life you cant just knock a person unconscious for hours with no consequences on them.#but i dont care when it happens in fiction despite being not realistic!! bc its fiction!!!#unless of course the characters out of nowhere do a lil sidequest PSA abt how actually doing that is fine#and completely safe with no risks#yknow??#like if that happened id be annoyed and like no its fucking not fine why are you trying to convince me. just move on and dont bring it up#and I wont bring it up#anyway. yeah these are just some thoughts im having rn sorry its not more coherent and put-together i cant be assed rn lmao
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"Told you."
"Told me... what?"
"Told you, I got you 🧡"
#jasver 🧡#I don't know what my art style is beyond sketching because I hadn't done anything more than sticky note sketching since like 2021#but I had a Vision of Nighttime Jasver Beach Date and couldn't put it away#she is my WIFE#silver's art#self ship#fictional other#f/o art#suggestive#ish?? just in case#jasper 🏵️
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★ . ANGELINE’S æ.LINKIES 4 히라스
æ.linkies are quirky, little banners made to reconnect with that old-web nostalgia everyone yearns to experience all over again through ANGELINE.COM, while sharing our love and appreciation for all things hiraeth— from supporting their records and solo projects, to diving into their rich lore, or joining in on the many inside jokes angels everywhere adore. use them as badges or just for a bit of fun clickbait to show you're part of the angel community! wait… is it really clickbait if there’s some truth behind it..?
#glasshouseinc#ficnetfairy#fictional kpop community#fictional idol oc#fictional idol community#fictional kpop idol#fictional idol group#idolverse#idol oc#fake kpop group#kpop oc#kpop au#genuinenely (i still dont know how to write that) the funniest silliest post ive ever done#there were zero thoughts doing any of these#this most look terrible on mobile so yall will have to squint just like me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#tw flashing#?#idk if this is really flashy but just in case :)#⸺ # æ. ❯ angeline.
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i would absolutely love to hear your thoughts on isterik so if you wanted to ramble..... <3
you're probably gonna regret asking unless you actually enjoy hearing my incoherent thoughts but regardless I am holding your hands so tight rn thank you for asking<3
I have a lot of thoughts about them and I'll try to untangle some of them here .. I guess I'll just start w the obvious and say I feel like watering down isterik to "toxic bc Istvan groomed erik" is a pretty dismissive way to talk about such a raw and volatile display of love. people are once again doing what they did with hansry and trying to understand their relationship through a modern lens when it's not that simple, especially since we're missing a lot of information from two very unreliable narrators. I'm not saying istvan didn't foster an unhealthy relationship with erik by taking him in, caring for him like a father would, and being intimate as lovers - he absolutely did. i'm just honestly bored of the discussions around Problematic relationships starting and ending with "that's toxic" as if Bad People aren't capable of loving just as deeply as anyone else especially if their circumstances are a bit... unusual. I mean, why do people do anything? to live and love, right? and no im not saying it's all okay bc they love each other, it's still bad but both can coexist.
it's interesting that we hear different accounts from both on how they met - istvan found erik during a raid and took him in, but we don't know the details. we don't know what situation erik was in, why istvan was so drawn to him, or hell, if maybe erik killed his own parents instead and istvan is just saying that to protect him. this is the story we hear from istvan, but we get two different recountings from erik. one is in kcd1 where he tells henry point blank that istvan killed his parents and he's stronger than his parents ever were, but then in kcd2 he calls henry a liar about istvan killing his parents. this confused me when I first heard it bc I could've sworn he was aware, so I thought maybe it was a retcon. all well and good I guess, but I thought,, well what if it isn't? as far as I'm aware nothing else has been retconned, so why would this be?
so I try to think of it a different way, just to see if that would even work. maybe it might be a key inconsistency of erik's mental state, showing how he's still trying to grapple what the fuck happened that day. I mean, it's hard to recall all the details of a traumatic event, right? especially if it happens to you so young. maybe erik has no recollection of what really happened and trusts what istvan told him. or he knows and he just doesn't need to justify anything to anyone, especially not to henry. maybe in the first game, since istvan is still alive, he plays up the hardened bandit face and says "yeah, istvan killed my parents in cold blood - know that he doesn't fuck around", but after he dies, well, we've seen him. he's thrown into a rage that will eventually consume him. his entire reason for fighting is gone, and henry bringing up something he tried so hard to ignore... well, yeah, id be pissed too.
again... I'm just speculating. in the end it could just be a retcon and I'm going insane over such a minor detail, oh well. we just don't have enough information to make a conclusion, but I guess that's the point. it's like they both said, we don't understand their relationship and we never will.
moving on from that.... since you were so kind to ask I'm gonna throw in a bit of rare lore about myself to kinda connect why isterik is like the light of god to me - in my own writing I try to explore a wide variety of relationships and character behaviours, almost anything goes really because I do believe fiction should be a safe space for writers to explore concepts without it being reflective of them as people.. some of the best stories I've been lucky to experience have been generally pretty dark, unafraid to explore beyond the boundaries of what we're comfortable with,, because well, it's real. and why not. isterik reminds me of one relationship I have - similarly a relationship that can't easily be defined because of the parties' roles in society, the circumstances of their meeting, and of course as two men. so, my understanding of this relationship does stem from my own experience writing these kinds of relationships, which in turn stems from my observations of people around me.
and I do love that honestly. can't give warhorse enough credit for making their characters so believable. what fascinates me about isterik is that they very obviously love each other and treat each other as equals. its obvious that istvan isn't using erik. he doesn't try to hide how much he cares for him.. why would he beg for erik's life instead of his? istvan has been playing the theatrical villain this whole time, but the moment his right hand man is threatened, he breaks. i've briefly mentioned this before but its unnerving how he begs for erik's life. this game once again shows you how your enemies are just as capable of love and fear whether you like it or not, they're people too.
erik is more than some pawn. if istvan wanted to, he could easily replace him. but erik isn't disposable. istvan saw something familiar within erik and only he could drag it out - he built erik up and protected him the way he wished someone would've done for him after his parents were killed by the turks. he was alone and suffered god knows how long until he finally gained some semblance of control in his life, and then he taught erik to never let anyone take that control away... but who was the one who did that to him in the first place? is he talking to erik or himself? istvan himself has a lot of issues, but if you look past his mad rambling there really is some truth to it (a whole other thing to get into on my istvan analysis... somewhere in the future)
along w that i don't believe erik is entirely some helpless thing that doesn't understand what kind of situation he's in. the tragic thing is he was, but that boy is long dead and buried (and something I won't ever forget is how we see a glimpse of erik being normal through godwin's eyes... horse racing? really? that entire sequence was uncomfortable, erik is completely void of emotion, aside from rage of course, I honestly don't believe all of this was istvan's doing. something must've already been wrong with him, which could explain why istvan kept him and fed that hatred). at the same time, I don't believe erik is any worse than istvan, at least not when he's alive (like i found it interesting that when erik freed istvan, he begged him to flee when istvan wanted to kill henry.. idk how to explain, i feel like istvan was the reason he was even able to 'control' his anger. another thing i need to think on more).
istvan is clearly the one pulling the strings of everyone around him - the enabler - while erik is the muscle (no I'm not saying he's not smart but he's not capable of being manipulative like istvan, check their respective roles in society). he won't last long without istvan. his guiding light is gone. istvan and erik make each other stronger (better for them, worse for us), they fight for each other and for their place in the world - just like henry and hans do. they're really not so different, it's true. henry goes to great lengths to avenge his parents, believing it is the righteous thing to do, but so does erik. they were both horribly wronged and will fight to get that control back no matter the cost. they are products of war, extensions of their lords to be used and discarded. they're lucky if anyone cares about them at all in the end. and this is what istvan was trying to protect erik from and warn henry about. they're the same, but morality separates them in their ultimately selfish actions.
morality. that's the difference. hanush said this exactly in the first game - if i recall correctly, that their honour is what separates them from the common bandit. henry and hans believe in honour, it's what stops them from going too far even if they feel otherwise it in their hearts. henry especially can act on these darker thoughts - taking his revenge too far by taking his anger out on his allies and treating his enemies as subhuman... but isterik aren't caught up about imaginary concepts of mortality and honour, or especially in istvan's case, he doesn't fear god. they revel in their daily routine of pillaging and killing those they deem lesser, a threat. more importantly, they're doing it together (cute date ideas or whatever). anyone who threatens the other is in for a world of pain - I mean of course, no one would let their loved ones be threatened, but to the degree to which istvan and erik will go for each other is what most people would consider extreme. istvan was willing to let his hostages be violated just at the mere thought of erik being harmed, erik is hellbent on skinning henry and by extension hans.. and anyone who gets in his way.... which is why I do expect him to be in kcd3 if it happens, probably not as a major antagonist, but like how henry hunted istvan, erik will hunt henry. i don't see erik's story ending well, whatever he ends up doing to henry or even hans. his entire reason for living was taken from him, he'll burn the world and himself with it because that's the kind of person he is (which yk.... as a tragedy enjoyer.... evil emoji).
despite people thinking in terms of extremes with them, i do think they are capable of being normal with each other.. i mean, we've seen it. how tender istvan became when he said goodbye to erik. how erik was hesitant yet calm in his presence. so much left unsaid, we can't even begin to understand what was taken from erik that night. i wonder how long he stayed at istvan's grave after burying him, how often he went back to talk to him or just sit in silence. maybe he never went back at all. im normal about them. and i will be very normal about kcd3.
so anyway tl;dr I'm incredibly biased and I love when love is so so messy and passionate. they do not need a redemption arc or any kind of justification on Why This Relationship Is Ok Actually or why people who enjoy it are also bad people or whatever juvenile discourse people r having. they're unapologetically fucked up and I love them for it. they don't need to change people need to expand their minds and find enlightenment through isterik. or something
but who knows maybe I'm entirely wrong, this is just rambling off the top of my head bc its 2am now and I'm definitely missing a lot that would usually go in a more well thought out post but... I'll get around to that at some point lol. I would love to hear your thoughts as well or if anyone else feels like discussing this further . go crazy with my blessing
#if isterik has 0 fans im dead. they make me sick. i want what they have . i mean what. who said that#ask a simple question get an essay in return i am. so sorry. kinda. i rlly do appreciate the question tho thanks again<3#hope I understood this question right if you wanted isterik headcanons or smth I need to have a few drinks first lmao#would love to share silly headcanons in general but I feel like people will throw rocks at me so I stay quiet on that .#kcd2#kcd2 spoilers#istvan toth#isterik#ask six#six dissects#also i don't feel the need to say this but just in case someone sees this and gets the wrong idea... this applies to fiction only ok#we have fun here#no pearl clutching in my house
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The mentally stable Dimitri Fire emblem 3 hopes.
It surprises me that there's still ppl claiming so, but then I remember we're talking about 3h interpretations and I have to make peace with it.
But that doesn't stop me from venting a little bit in this little space I have lol. Actually, it dries me and makes me feel bad to bring this up because I will have to talk bad about Dedue, and I don't want to talk Bad about Dedue. He's a genuinely good boy. But "Human" nonetheless, which means Flaws. I like Felix too but he's become some sort of a clown that doesn't make me feel too bad. I like Felix tho, In a different way.
Mostly talking about these two because the take that "Dimitri has better support system" baffles me because, technically, these two are his support system in HopesVerse. The persons who Dimitri relays on and seek solace/advice/support. The rest doesn't really tackle any of his personal struggles (aside from the Mage!Mitri frustrated dream, but that's out of the bad equation in our 'mentally unwell' set of pixels, and Shez only has a glimpse). Contrary, to Houses verse where the whole blue lions cast knew about his shit, didn't know what to do, but didn't leave either.
I tackled this topic with other person on Twitter who was (or still is) on board with this take and the phrase they used was They contained him better, which of course I agree and remarked that was exactly the problem. Contain him is gonna be contra productive. I used a water dam analogy, where the structure of such dam is damaged, and the pressure of water keeps accumulating. Causing a foreseeable damage for the dam itself and the surroundings. You don't need to be a genius to understand it, you need experience or knowledge for mental ill topics tho.
I really don't want to extend so much on here because it's mostly just, rant format more than a proper analysis so I just want to point out these two things in their support conversations.
First, Dedue. Encourage him to keep on the vengeful path. Which we know was the final goal of Azure Moon and if you payed attention to 3 houses message. The whole Vengeful argument was something Bad, to keep it simple. Despite Dimitri actively looking for answers/guidance for something that, in a rational state he can see clearly like vengeance will consume his life (also Shez and Felix called out this behavior). Dedue answer only encourage him to keep on that path, because he would do that 💔. Presenting 2 oposite views is a great formula for confusion and disorientation. Now, Dedue's role is primary SUPPORT, not guidance nor orientation. He will support his shit no matter what, and we are quite aware of that if played Houses.
Second, Felix. Felix is a special case. He is smart but also an idiot lacks A LOT of soft skills to actually be of help. He's the only one who knows in this verse about Dimitri having a mental issue. In their A support to say the least, so they don't close or solve anything. What makes it more worrisome is the fact that Felix conceals the issue as a secret.
"So try to keep that whole "removing their heads" thing in check, yeah? We can just call it our little secret."
this extract here makes me feel so unwell 😭help
The whole burden falls over him and his lack of skills and wisdom on the matter will be too much for him later on. He at least, will be able to recognize that the problem is beyond of his capabilities and will look for help. Felix himself has his own issues and journey where he needs to learn. He's forced to get pass beyond some of his angry teen behavior but hasn't completely get over it.
There is a lot more to tackle, but that requires more work and time. What are the topics some of you think is important to cover around understanding the Hopes verse resolution? Dimitri's route? something? Do you think the route without Byleth is better? With that being said, I would like to delve deeper into character analysis, and the role each played for the Lords too. That also requires to talk about the Byleth and needs a whole analysis on their own, which requires time (which i don't have much lol) To end this vent, I would like to encourage people to do a little research for the terminology they're using like "Support System". Who makes it up and how it operates successfully. The fact that ppl saying "he has better support system" only because he didn't go feral on the run alone is not entirely valid. A reminder that people can feel alone with or without people around them. And containing the issue within doesn't solve any problem. At best, it's presented later. At worse, it gets worse.
#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#my lil blorbo with mental health issues#few3hopes#fire emblem warriors 3 hopes#Today I woke up and felt like venting#BUT Just to make myself clear#this has nothing to do with ships#you can ship whatever you want#You do you#Just in case someone has that feeling#This is an analysis from a mental health point of view#because it is one of the strong points of this character and with which many of us connect/relate#So I like to apply psychological and neurological (even psychiatric if necessary) perspectives#And I like to apply realistic theories to this fictional world because that is the good thing about three-dimensional characters#They feel so human that all these hypotheses can be applied#If some of you don't. That's cool too. You do you#Enjoy the game as you please lil fella#ALSO ALSO I'm taking into account what the intention of the developers was#(that would be tricky considering the inconsistency withing the developers' team >___>)
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“Walk a gal home?”
rohan projecthadea of @nyehilismwriting’s Project Hadea fame you will always be famous to me
#what was that poem abt characters with neon vacancy signs above their heads I’ve been thinking abt that poem recently#anyway LOVE to draw xem fucked up glowy babygirl of all time#my operative isn’t even romancing xem they’re in deep on that Nash situationship which btw is like catnip to me#but I just think xe’s neat#tbh#kind of prey animal rage kind of character rn. to me.#on further reflection the poem might have been about. well. supernatural#yikes#oh well!#many such cases#project hadea#rohan#fanart#interactive fiction#🫁
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#a doodley#okkk 2022: the torture chamber....i only sparsely drew al and developed talon (he was borned...) bc my mind was occupied with other things.#2023: exiting torture chamber; it took me a tiny little bit to get back to drawing and ''interacting with'' al again but i did it even#though it was a reminder of the Bad bc he's my copium#summer 2023: i view and witness media and suddenly have like 5 fictional men i cant decide on which to focus... and september (talon month)#comes along so I decide to focus on Talon after not touching him much at all throughout the entire year#(forced this btw i did not wanna do it LOL i didnt even remember how to draw him)#september 2023 to now: talon has infiltrated the brain. but i want to swivel back to al#now: i've forgotten how to Talk to al (just like i did in beginning of 2023)#(and just like i forgot how to talk to talon for most of 2023)#so ive kind of just been replaying the smunker cow al daydreams from when they first met#so I can find my way back...retracing my steps#in doing so ive kind of also forgotten how to interact with talon but still havent gotten back to al#so rn my life is so boring without imaginary bf interactions. just the before sleep plot rehashing daydreams...#or sparse visions of em Sometimes#nobody in my brain rn just like the short period last yr and its distressing#what do i draw without a love obsession.....#how do i pass time without it....! so boring. idk what to do#i miss the me of several yrs ago when i was drawing 50 different aus with al....ive downgraded in skill and imagination and creativity#so bad since then. idk. idk. i hope they come back to me soon#maybe i shld just draw al a lot which is how i kickstarted caring abt talon again almost a yr ago ?#hoping i can get him to come back before my surgery i need my big sexy boy nurse for recovery#(complaining abt things usually fixes em for me so im hoping thats the case here)
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