#like. why else. literally why else prove me wrong
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Okay lets start immediately with, I'm not using race as a tool, crying hate doesn't absolve you of wrong doing and spreading misinformation, I don't need to be black to tell you it's shitty to justify the shit used to ensalve your ancestors, that's just obviously fucked up
Once again you immediately go to the rules for hebrew slaves, the year of jubilee only applies to hebrew slaves, the death penalty is only for kidnapping, whereas selling and buying slaves is explicitly allowed, but they are generally instead the children of the slave traders or of course, prisoners of war or slaughter, that of course does not make it better and is where a lot of the african slaves in america came from
You clearly missed my point about the shellfish, it's that god can prohibit shellfish but not slavery, you are seriously arguing that god will tell people not to eat a certain food but not bother to say you can't own slaves, I do not lack maturiy but I guess your opinion is noted, if of course you are using personal views of me as a person to try to dismiss my points however, that is what we call and "ad hominem attack" the slavery commanded in the bible for non hebrew slaves is of course, directly equivelent to american chattel slavery, stop using hebrew slave laws, you're seriously arguing that because they treated people in their group better it's fine and ignoring the ones outside of the group that were treat exactly like your ancestors
Job was literally punished and tortured by god to prove a point, that's fucked up no matter what you believe and it's also god directly killng children
My grammar and spelling is perfectly fine, and you have still failed to give a reason why we should take exodus 20 as direct command of god, but exodus 21 directly following it as anything other than that, you have just decided that arbitrarily because it fits your worldview, whereas it's context and place in the bible would dictate that it is, infact, divine instruction
Also if your god is that sort that even allows slavery to happen, that's fucked up, but you still haven't given me any good reason why it was allowed and not commanded, because again, everything else would say otherwise
You did a great job of dodging the questions about the slave's bible or god just murdering children
Kinda funny how you only address the points you think you have an excuse for, and what exactly implies I "desire so badly for my question to be answered" I honestly couldn't care less because I know the answer will avoid the real bad stuff and just use someone else's bad apologetics, however, of course, it'll reflect quite poorly on you and your religion if you can't answer these questions, so I'll lay it out again
Tell me the difference between the rules for specifically non hebrew slaves and american chattel slavery, as none of the rules you've mentioned up to this point apply to non hebrew slaves
Explain the existence of the slave's bible if you don't think it played a large role in american slavery
"Well we can't understand god so whatever he does is fine" is just a terrrible cop out, but I get it, you can't actually justify his horrible action so the best you can do with "well we just can't understand it"
And if you want, lil bonus question if you of course, are even able to respond or give a shit to, what's up with god killing children? The first born sons of the egyptians? And demanding a sacrifice of a lamb and the smearing of it's blood on the doorway to mark the children he is not to kill
And bonus 2, just the entire slaughter of the caananites
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stuck in the what-if spiral 😭
#my brain convincing me that my what ifs are real bc of my vivid imagination... like imagining it makes it feel real#and adhd causes memory issues so I'm just. comparing it to other imaginary scenarios and/or real memories#to try and prove that my dumb spiraling isn't real or anything but to my brain I'm so scared that it almost makes it real l#literally mentally traumatizing myself because my brain won't let go of this anxiety that I've rolled my eyes at for years#like!! help!!! I'm fixating!! I've never fixated like this before but I've also never thought of A Scenario before#which is why I'm convincing myself it's real even though the logical part of me is like ????? no???????#the problem is that my anxiety brain convinces me that the logical part is just denial#which is why what-if anxieties are so dangerous for me#especially in the summer#bc then I can't think about ANYTHING else and I rationalize way too much#my mom is like ''are your worries (which I've described to her in vague terms) true? and if they're not stop worrying''#and I'm like BUT THE WHAT IF IS WHAT IF I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S TRUE!!!!!#there is no way to move beyond this that I can see it's all consuming#how can I be so totally fine for part of the day and then become non-functional with anxiety like this so quickly#and then pivot back to being totally fine later??? what's wrong with me?? why does everything feel Worse and more important this time???
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Have I ranted before about how the Devil's Square makes no fucking sense?
So I'm trying to write the next part of Batgirl, Repentant, and more fool me, that means I need to go back and re-read parts of Batgirl (2009) for research. And like what always happens when I do that, I noticed yet another detail that stops working when you stop to think about it for even a moment.
Because see, on the second page of the third issue, we get these two moments in rapid succession.
Scarecrow's hideout is in "Gotham's Western Quadrant, the Devil's Square," established in the previous issue as a bad neighborhood, quote, "Otherwise known as 'Thunderdome.'" This place is treated like it's a Big Stinkin' Deal for the first two arcs (maybe the first year? I don't remember clearly and I don't want to go any further down this rabbit hole than I have) of this series, but nothing about it makes sense.
We are never ever given a clear reason why this neighborhood is supposedly such a uniquely terrible place, but it's supposedly so bad that it's worth making a whole terrible philosophy lecture out of why criminals would choose to stay there.
But the closest thing we get is that, at one point, Professor Exposition describes it as "a demilitarized zone."
Which does not make any goddamn sense because that would require Gotham City as a whole to be the location of an ongoing military conflict. Y'know, like the one between the Koreas.
I can only assume, given Brian Miller et al's tendency to do zero research on even the most basic of plot elements (see also: labeling all of Stephanie's obviously freshman-level college classes with 400-level designations intended for seniors or grad students) that what he actually meant here was autonomous zone. Like the CHAZ, as imagined by your Republican uncle. The implication being that this is an area of town that's been completely abandoned by police and emergency services, reducing it to a lawless wasteland where criminals roam free. (A no man's land, you might say. 🙄)
EXCEPT. APPARENTLY. LITERALLY ONE ISSUE LATER. We get the panels I started this post off with, where Steph arrives at Scarecrow's hide-out in the Devil's Square and we get EXPLICIT confirmation that the police will be there in five minutes.
That's all to say nothing of the fact that it being "Gotham's Western Quadrant" that's been cut off makes zero sense on its face. Besides implying that's an entire QUARTER of the city that's just been completely abandoned, Steph at one point describes it as being "on the west bank of the Gotham River."
There is no west bank of the Gotham River. Gotham is on a series of islands off the coast of New Jersey. The west bank of the Gotham River is the MAINLAND where Bristol and the suburbs are.
Gotham's geography is super fluid and can change from book to book, but it being on an island connected only by a series of bridges was a big deal in this era and the only reason the No Man's Land concept even worked. If you're gonna rip that plot off, Miller, you gotta use an eastern neighborhood. Or a northern one. Or even a southern tip. Anything but west. That's like saying there's an east side of Chicago.
#batgirl 2009#batgirl 2009 critical#batgirl repentant#this to say nothing of the fact that the police showing up in 5 minutes#means there's literally no reason for Steph to even go inside the murder hospital#there's no stakes#no time limit#no one's in danger#she doesn't even like or care about any of the people who've been forcibly drugged#all she's doing by going in there is tipping Scarecrow off ahead of time#and the only justification is 'I'm seeing something through for once!' which is just insulting to her previous character???#whatever else you want to say about War Games Stephanie SAW THAT SHIT THROUGH#it's WHY SHE DIED#she saw an entire PREGNANCY to term#it comes across like the only reason she's doing this is because Barbara bruised her delicate little ego#and she needs to Prove That Bitch Wrong About Me#uuuuuugh#ranting in the tags#stephanie brown critical#also in the tags
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reading dungeon meshi
#random thoughts#it has the kind of plot i hate where you retread the same plot point repeatedly while making progress elsewhere#like hi falin bye falin#like i cared about them finding falin. then they found her. and now she's gone again.#i don't like marcille but in like. a compelling way. she's my favorite archetype of character who is specifically female for some reason?#lady who thinks her way is the right way and she's morally right and therefore everyone else is wrong#high conscientiousness with low openness to experience. see themselves as agreeable dutiful and restrained while not being any of that#they tend to take on moralistic causes but they usually don't have a defined reason for WHY they're doing it so it just comes off as preachy#and the narrative tends to take their side with no basis in why#like when marcille tried to prove herself with the mandrakes and put everyone in danger and senshi conceded he was ALSO in the wrong???#and even marcille was like 'that wasn't my point at all'#that entire chapter made me mad it was so good#it's also doing that thing i hate when a piece of media introduces too many characters at once#like who's who what's what who is important who should i remember#i love the detail put into the cooking sessions!!!#i love how all the characters are so fucked up and not even in plot-important ways#like chilchuck's cowardice is very important to the plot but senshi was straight-up willing to let a man die for his flavorful cooking lmao#laios is. my man. i need him carnally.#i get that the whole 'got eaten by dragon' thing was not meant to be the Whole Plot but i feel like the background plot is just not my thing#either that or it wasn't set up in a compelling enough way?#idk. im still reading#all in all i think dungeon meshi might just not be my thing? plot-wise i mean. i love the characters and the general premise#of monster biology and environmentalism and cooking and augh#i don't like how everytime senshi corrects marcille on something so far he ends up going 'i guess i also need to learn a thing or two'#like on the mandrakes? the man has FIELD EXPERIENCE he was entirely in the right to prefer his method!!!#and on the environment thing? first of all marcille's whole thing is building artificial dungeons she SHOULD care about the food chain#SECOND OF ALL telling marcille she shouldn't kill so many fishmen isn't playing GOD or whatever#that kraken was a fucking. extenuating circumstance. it was literally there just to make marcille's argument credible#animals killing each other through the food chain is different from marcille using what is essentially a rocket launcher#god i ran out of tags. peace and luv bruvs 🤟 kind of have a hate crush on marcille now. need her
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Why is Obito's height and weight listed as 182cm/70.3kg while Tobi is 175cm/55.9kg. THATS THE SAME FUCKING DUDE HOW DID OBITO SHRINK HIMSELF?????
#also idk how different those weights are in pounds but regardless he put on a noticeable amount of weight after the reveal#which like. HOW???? cuz im sure its not counting clothes. SO WTF HAPPENED?????#wait. hold on. theory after its been like. 10 years or whatever.#can we prove that the tobi acting like a moron was not actually guruguru??? and any time the sharingan was used. that was obito in#the tobi disguise???? now theres a lot im forgetting from the final arc. so correct me if thats impossible or already disproven.#but how else could obito do that???? UNLESS IT WASNT ACTUALLY HIM??? cuz the tobi persona is literally based on guruguru anyway#and once again i have to ask. fucking why??? whats the point???? why did he act like a schoolgirl in love with his senpai????#eternal question. i will die still asking why he fucking DID THAT#dont get me wrong. tobi has always been one of my ultimate faves even before the madara/obito reveal. BUT WHAT WAS THE POINT????#all the more reason for it to have been guruguru if possible#which is a bit of a sad thought actually. cuz even now i still wish tobi was just some fuckin weirdo with a big secret for how he managed#to join the akatsuki that wasnt 'im secretly the leader claiming to be madara uchiha'#anyway. smaller obito theory i guess like that smaller luke skywalker theory#personal
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well, all right i’m bad, but then you’re no prize either…
pair: joel miller x fem!reader
wc: 8.6k
contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, no ellie, general violence (only referenced), age gap (56/26), swearing, so many spacers lmao, not quite friends to lovers and not quite enemies to lovers but a weird other thing, kinda mean!joel for a good sec, dressing wounds, joel miller TUMMY, loss of virginity (reader is a virgin but she's not completely oblivious and weirdly infantile about it lmao), fingering (fem!receiving), p in v, unprotected sex whoops, size kink, belly bulging, pussy pronouns, porn with a tiny plot, no use of y/n.
nat’s note: well, i finally caved y’all. baby’s first tlou fic! this literally took me forever to write and even longer to post cause i was so terrified LMAO so please give me some grace if it’s shit and he’s ooc and timelines are a little fuzzy cause i barely know what i’m doing. thank you chickens love you mwah mwah mwah. kisses!
dividers by lovely @saradika-graphics!
joel found a lodge house…
You don’t know what you did to make Joel Miller hate you so much.
He's never outright said it, but you know it’s there—in every sharp glance, every clipped word, every deliberate avoidance.
Besides, his silence is worse than anything he could say. A quiet condemnation that settles in your chest like stone.
You tell yourself it doesn’t matter, that you don’t care what he thinks, but the truth is harder to swallow.
You do care—more than you want to admit. His approval, his respect, hell, even a sliver of kindness from him feels like an impossible prize you’ll never win.
And you hate yourself for wanting it. For needing it.
It's not just the weight of his disdain that eats at you, it's the not knowing why. God, do you wish you could ask him why.
What did you do to make him look at you like you’re some necessary evil he has to tolerate. Why does he hold some unspoken grudge that's manifested itself into something you couldn't dream of ever comprehending.
But the thought of confronting Joel feels like standing on the edge of a cliff, staring down into a void that might swallow you whole.
So instead, you do what you've always done. You keep your distance, try to match his indifference with your own, and tell yourself it’s better this way.
You were young when the outbreak hit, six years old.
You’re sure that’s part of it. That that’s how Joel sees you, as some bumbling, naive child who’s more of a hassle than anything else.
Another mouth to feed, another back to watch, baggage.
You've been with him for almost seven months now, traveling side by side when you may have well been miles apart. Trekking through abandoned cities, overgrown highways, and every godforsaken patch of wilderness in between.
In the beginning, you did everything you could to prove him wrong.
You pushed yourself past your limits, hunted, scavenged, fought, kept up. You did everything that needed to be done without hesitation.
All to show that you were more than what he made you out to be. It never seemed to matter much.
After you lost your parents in the early days of the outbreak, it was just you and your sister. She taught you everything you know, taught you how to survive.
It's because of her that you know how to shoot a rifle, how to skin a rabbit, how to start a fire with nothing but sticks and dried moss, how to snap bones and locate which vital arteries bleed out the quickest.
It's because of her that you've been able to hone some sick skill in the maiming of clickers.
A skill you never thought you'd need to use on her.
You were supposed to be safe in the QZ. You weren't supposed to be fifteen years old, aiming a gun at the one person you had left.
Your own flesh and blood wasn't supposed to be the very first in a long list of red tallies under your belt.
It’s been years and you’ve still never forgotten that day. December 19th, 2012, the date burned into your brain like someone took a branding iron to the tissue.
You can’t count the amount of times you’ve been ripped from your sleep drenched in a cold sweat with the tail end of a scream tearing at the skin of your throat.
The image of what was left of your sister, slumped on the ground lifeless as her blood painted the wall behind her flashing behind your closed eyelids. The sound of her last labored breath ringing in your ears louder than any shotgun blast.
You ran that same night, with the weight of her death on your shoulders.
Your entire world spinning out around you as you clawed through barbed wire fencing, not caring where you were going or what would happen to you—just needing to escape.
There was nothing left for you to do after that but survive. And that’s what you did, for years, scraping by in a world that had already chewed you up and spit you out a mangled mess.
You learned how to be ruthless because of it.
How to harden yourself against the loss, the pain, the brutality. But there were cracks, too. Cracks you hid well, buried deep beneath layers of stubbornness and distance.
The endless days blurred into each other. Empty houses, hollow streets. A life reduced to scavenging, hiding, and the occasional, fleeting moment of human connection that inevitably ended in loss.
And then you found yourself with Joel.
You hadn’t exactly found him, though. More like crashed into his orbit by accident.
A few desperate days spent scavenging through the ruins of a small town, a chance encounter that left you both wary and unwilling to turn your backs.
But, inexplicably, you somehow became part of his traveling routine.
He wasn’t like any of the others you’d met before. At first, you thought he might be different. A man who seemed broken, but different nonetheless.
As the days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, you began to see the truth. Joel Miller wasn’t concerned with you. He didn’t need you. And, more than that, he didn’t want you around.
You didn’t know what to do with that.
It’s a bitter kind of irony. You’ve survived all this time completely on your own, fought tooth and nail to stay alive, but with him, you might just crumble.
Joel found a lodge house. It's a small, weathered place tucked away in the dense trees of the wood surrounding it.
He only deemed it suitable after an extensive perimeter check and a thorough sweep of the interior.
It's not much—just another run-down place in the middle of nowhere—but for the first time in what feels like forever, it’s a roof over your head for the night.
The walls are sturdy, though the windows are cracked and half of the floorboards creak like they're about to give out at any moment.
You explored the second floor alone, creeping through the desolate rooms and taking in all that was left behind.
Old family photographs covered in thick layers of dust, worn clothes riddled with holes still hung in the few closets you stumble across.
The oddest of all was an old jewelry box tucked away in a dresser draw, tarnished silver dull and muddy.
The sound of familiar footsteps comes from somewhere behind you. The door creaks open slowly.
Joel. Of course.
He clears his throat, the sound abrasive in the quiet of the house.
“Fire’s low,” he says, voice rough from its lack of use today.
You don’t turn around, not yet. You take the box in your gloved hand, running your fingers across the intricate design of the lid, touch trailing over winding vines and small roses.
“Okay,” you mutter, your voice coming out quieter than you intended. “I’ll grab some more wood later.”
Another beat of silence. Then, “It’s gettin�� cold out, I’ll go.”
Your fingers pause their ministrations, moving to flip the lid open. Empty.
“Suit yourself,” you reply after a moment, your tone just as neutral as his.
Joel doesn’t leave right away. You hear the floorboards groan beneath his weight, his presence lingering in the doorway.
You wonder what he’s waiting for, or if he’s waiting at all.
Finally, he speaks. “Don’t touch anything.”
With that he turns and leaves the room, you wait until you can’t hear his footsteps trailing down the stairs anymore to let out the scoff festering in your chest.
You snap the jewelry lid shut with a little more force than necessary. “Asshole.”
Joel's been gone for a while now. Longer than it takes to chop a few logs for firewood.
You came down from the upstairs a few minutes after hearing the tell-tale sound of the heavy door opening and closing. The main room is quiet, save for the soft crackle of the dwindling fire.
You're perched on an old armchair near the entrance, peering out the dirty window that has the best view of the treeline as you nervously pick the skin around your nails.
You tell yourself not to worry. He’s probably fine, he’s been doing this a lot longer than you. And if Joel is anything, it’s annoyingly competent.
Still, a nagging doubt itches at the back of your mind. It's been at least half an hour, maybe more.
You’re just about to grab your own pack and go looking for him when the front door creaks open.
Joel stumbles inside, the frigid evening air rushing in behind him before he slams the door shut. At first glance, he looks fine—no more haggard than usual.
But then you notice the way he favors his left side, the way his free hand is pressed against his ribs, blood seeping through his fingers and staining his torn undershirt.
You’re on your feet in an instant.
“Fuck,” you say, voice sharper than you expected. “What the hell happened?”
“Raiders.” Is the only explanation you get as he tries to brush past you like it’s nothing. The stiff way he moves and the tightens of his jaw betray him. “S’just a scratch.”
“Bullshit,” you snap, stepping in front of him and blocking his path to the fire. “Sit. Now.”
He gives you a look, one of those deep, withering glares you’ve seen him use to intimidate countless others into submission. But you stand your ground, chin raised and jaw set–defiant.
His stubbornness finally meeting its match in your own.
Finally, with a low growl of frustration, he drops onto the couch. “Happy now?”
"Not until you let me take care of that." You motion toward his side, where the blood is still spreading.
“I’m fine,” he mutters, lolling his head back to rest more heavily on the couch.
“Sure you are,” you snap, crossing the room to rifle through your bag. “And I’m the fucking Queen of England.”
"Said I’m fine," he bites through gritted teeth, but you’re already moving, heading back to him with the first aid kit from your pack.
"You want to bleed out on this ugly-ass couch? Be my guest," you shoot back, dropping to your knees in front of him. "Otherwise, shut up and let me help."
Joel surprisingly doesn’t argue any further, just sighs heavily and reluctantly sinks further into the couch cushions.
You push the front of his jacket open to slide it off his shoulders as gently as you can, peeling back the layer of his flannel next.
The smell of blood hits you immediately.
The gash is about five inches long, trailing the span of his ribcage. It’s deep—but not fatal—just an angry red and oozing blood.
Definitely not the simple 'scratch' he made it out to be.
Your stomach churns at the sight, but you push it down. No time for that.
“Jesus, Joel,” you mutter under your breath, reaching for the alcohol in your kit. “You really know how to underplay a situation, huh?”
He doesn’t respond, just watches you with those dark, calculating eyes of his. Always watching, always assessing.
It’s unnerving, but you focus on the task at hand, grabbing a clean cloth and soaking it with alcohol.
“This is gonna hurt,” you warn, though there’s a part of you that doesn’t mind the idea of causing him a little discomfort.
A petty, vindictive part that still stings from all the scorn he’s thrown your way.
“Just get it over with,” Joel grits out, his voice low and gravelly.
You don’t give him any more warnings as you wipe the soaked cloth over the wound. He flinches, a harsh curse slipping through clenched teeth, but he doesn’t pull away.
You work as quickly as you can, wiping away the blood and dirt with steady hands, your movements as gentle as possible given the situation.
You let out an annoyed huff when the torn fabric of his shirt gets in the way of your hands for a second time.
You lean back on your heels, glancing up at Joel. “You need to take your shirt off.”
Joel raises a brow at you, his lips pressing into a thin line. “That really necessary?”
“Yes, it’s necessary, Joel,” you huff, already losing patience. “Unless you want me to sit here and cut around every thread of this ratty thing while you bleed out, then by all means—”
He sighs heavily, cutting you off as he shifts forward and grabs the hem of his shirt. He tugs at the fabric, grunting in pain each time it strains his ribs.
You roll your eyes at how slow he’s moving, and your patience—already worn thin by the day's events—snaps.
“Jesus Christ, let me help,” you huff, reaching forward and grabbing the fabric.
Joel jerks back slightly, his hand shooting up to stop yours mid-motion. “I got it,” he growls, a sharp edge in his voice.
You glare at him, your hand still caught in his grip. His palm is calloused, his hold firm enough to make your pulse jump unexpectedly.
For a moment, the two of you just sit there, locked in a silent standoff.
Then he releases your hand and pulls the shirt over his head himself, wincing as the movement pulls at his side.
You wait with your arms crossed, trying to ignore the awkward flutter of nerves in your stomach as the fabric peels away to reveal his chest.
Joel’s broad, solid frame isn’t new to you. You’ve seen him shirtless before—brief glimpses when bathing in rivers or changing in run down houses between stops.
But this time feels different, more intimate somehow.
You’re staring, and you know it.
The firelight cast shadows over his skin, illuminating old scars, faint lines of muscle, the barely there jut of his stomach over the hem of his jeans.
You had been getting more game kills recently, two hunters are always better than one.
Joel clears his throat, dragging your focus back to the present. “You gonna gawk all night, or can we move this along?”
You snap out of it, scowling to cover your embarrassment. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”
You finish cleaning the gash and grab the small needle and thread lying next to you.
“This’ll hurt worse than the alcohol,” you say, threading the needle easily.
Joel snorts, a rare sound. “Figures.”
The needle pierces his skin, and this time, you catch the smallest hitch in his breath. He doesn’t make a sound, but his jaw tightens, the veins in his neck standing out like cords.
His hands grip the edge of the couch hard enough that his knuckles turn white with it, but he doesn’t tell you to stop or slow down.
He’s too damn proud for that.
You shift closer, your knee brushing against his leg as you position yourself to work from a better angle. You feel his eyes on you, that intense, scrutinizing stare that makes your skin prickle.
“You’ve done this before,” Joel says after a moment, his tone less sharp than before. It’s not quite a question, more of an observation.
You shrug, keeping your hands steady. “Of course I have.”
“Who taught you?”
The question catches you off guard, Joel’s never shown much interest in what your life was before you met him. You glance up briefly, catching his gaze. There’s no malice there, no judgment—just curiosity.
You swallow hard, dragging your eyes back to stitches, half way done now. “My sister.”
You don’t elaborate and Joel doesn’t push.
Maybe it’s the sudden tightness in your tone or the look you know must be clouding your face that keeps him quiet.
You finish off the stitching, tearing the thin strand of thread with your hands before you’re leaning away again.
“Good as new,” you say, dabbing some more alcohol on your own hands to disinfect. “Try not to tear these open anytime soon.”
Joel leans back, strong arms spread across the back of the couch, his face unreadable as he peers down at the fresh stitching on his side.
“Could’ve done it myself,” he mutters, but the edge in his voice is gone, replaced with something softer, almost resigned.
You roll your eyes with a scoff, not even trying to hide your irritation as you rise from the floor. “Sure you could’ve, right before you passed out. You’re welcome by the way.”
You gather your supplies and turn to head back to your bag, but Joel’s voice stops you in your tracks.
“You’re always like this, y’know,” he says, and the words carry that same gravelly drawl, but there’s something new there—something heavier.
You pause, your hands tightening around the kit in your grasp. “Like what?”
“Pushy. Stubborn,” he replies, his tone cutting, though it lacks the usual venom. “Like you’ve got somethin’ to prove all the damn time.”
You whip around, your patience officially gone. “You think I’m stubborn?” you shoot back, your voice rising. “Coming from the guy who would rather bleed out on a fucking couch than admit he needs help?”
Joel’s jaw tightens, and his hands flex against the couch cushions, but you don’t stop. Not now. Not after months of this.
“I’ve been busting my ass since day one to prove that I’m not dead weight to you. I’ve fought for us, for you. And for what? Just to get more of your bullshit attitude?”
“You don’t know what the hell you’re talkin’ about,” Joel snaps, pushing himself upright despite the obvious strain it puts on his freshly stitched wound. “You don’t know a goddamn thing about me.”
“Because you won’t let me!” you fire back, stepping closer, your voice rising. “All you do is look at me like I’m some burden you can’t wait to get rid of.”
Joel’s glare sharpens, his lips parting as if to respond, but you cut him off.
You really can’t stop yourself now that you started, all the anger and frustration reaching a fever pitch hot enough to burst the tight lid you’ve kept on your emotions.
“If I’m such a hassle, why didn’t you just leave me back there, huh? Why didn’t you just walk away like I know you wanted to?”
Joel’s breathing is heavier now, his broad chest rising and falling as his dark eyes bore into yours.
For a moment, he doesn’t say anything. Then, he stands, and the sheer size of him forces you to tilt your chin up slightly to keep your glare fixed on his face.
“You think I wanted this, kid?” he growls, his voice low and strained, like he’s barely holding himself together. “You think I wanted to be responsible for someone else? To have someone else’s fuckin’ life on me?”
“Don’t call me kid,” you spit, shoving a finger into his chest, ignoring the way his jaw ticks at the contact. “I’m not a fucking kid.”
He scoffs, casting his eyes to the ceiling disbelievingly. “Could’ve fooled me.”
“Fuck you, Joel,” you growl, fists clenching at your side. “If you hate me that much, why the hell are you still here? Why didn’t you tell me to fuck off the second you met me?”
“Because I couldn’t!” Joel snaps, booming voice filling the small space.
The confession slips out like it pains him. His fists clench at his sides, and for a moment, he looks like he might break something.
You’ve never been scared of Joel, even though you’ve seen first hand just how scary he can be.
Now, as he looms in front of you, eyes blazing and jaw working furiously beneath his skin, it’s the closest to scared you’ve felt.
“I’ve seen you out there,” he continues, tone low and dark. “You’ve got a fuckin’ death wish. You’re too damn stubborn to just stop, and I’m not gonna let you go so you can run off and get yourself fuckin’ killed.”
Your heart pounds in your chest, his words hitting far too close to home.
“I’m just trying to survive, Joel,” you snap, your voice shaking. “That’s what we do, isn’t it? Survive.”
“Survive,” Joel repeats bitterly, his gaze burning into yours. “That what you call it? Throwin’ yourself into every goddamn fight, gettin’ stabbed and shot right fuckin’ in front of me and expecting me to brush that shit off?”
You let out a humorless laugh, nodding your head exasperatedly. “Yes, yes I do expect you to just brush it off, because that’s what you always do.”
“Well I can’t,” he grates out, taking a step closer. “I can’t ‘cause despite whatever it is that you may think about me, I don’t hate you. I care about you too damn much and that's my goddamn problem.”
That shuts you up, your mouth snapping closed with a sharp click of your teeth as you stare at him, shocked.
Joel holds your gaze, lips pressed into a thin line. “That what you wanted to hear?”
It’s in that moment that the fire finally fizzles out, the dull hiss of it the only sound left in the room.
You’re quiet for a beat, stunned into silence. The heat of his anger, his frustration, it radiates off him, and you realize suddenly that this isn’t just about you.
It never was.
“Then show me,” you challenge softly, your heart pounding in your chest. “Show me that you don’t hate me.”
Joel’s eyes darken, his head cocking to the side as he searches your face for a sign. You don’t say anything, you only square your shoulders and raise your chin, your eyes just as hard as his own.
“I want you to prove it.”
The tension snaps like a rubber band stretched too far.
You shouldn’t—this shouldn’t—happen. Not like this. Not after everything that’s been said.
But when Joel’s lips crash against yours, hot and desperate and urgent, it makes everything blur into nothing.
It’s not gentle, not soft—this is anger and longing and frustration all wrapped into one. It’s messy, frantic, like a fight that’s been brewing for too long.
He grips your arm, pulling you closer, almost too roughly, but it feels like it’s everything you’ve both been avoiding.
His other hand moves to cup the back of your neck, grounding you as his lips press harder against yours, like he’s trying to pour everything he can’t say into this single moment.
You respond just as fiercely, nails digging into the skin of his shoulders as you kiss him back with all the pent-up emotion that’s been simmering beneath the surface.
The coarse hair of his beard scrapes against the skin of your chin deliciously, the scent of blood and firewood filling your senses as his arm wraps around your waist, dragging you impossibly closer.
Close enough that you can feel the wild beat of his heart booming against your chest.
You pull away for a second, breathless, both of you looking at each other, your eyes wide and pupils blown.
“Goddamn it,” Joel mutters, his voice thick with frustration and something else you can’t place. He presses his forehead to yours, the deep brown of his eyes dark than before. “What the hell are we doing?”
You don’t have an answer. You’re not sure if you even want one.
You reach for him again, arms looping around his neck to drag his mouth back to yours.
This kiss is nothing like the first, it isn’t a clash of frustration–it’s filthier, rawer. A near feral thing, all teeth and tongue, a surge of hunger and need that borders on violence.
Joel groans into your mouth, a low, guttural sound that sends a shiver racing down your spine. His teeth catch your bottom lip, pulling just hard enough to make you gasp.
He takes advantage of the sound, his tongue sweeping into your mouth to slide against yours with wet, messy desperation, like he’s trying to claim every inch of you.
The taste of him—salt and iron and something distinctly Joel—makes your head spin.
Your fingers knot into the chocolaty curls at the nape of his neck, surprisingly soft to the touch. His own hands roam the soft curves of your body, rough and insistent, like he can’t decide where he wants to touch you most.
“Joel—” His name spills from your lips like a plea, and he answers with a deep, guttural noise that sends heat pooling low in your belly. His tongue follows the path of his teeth, soothing the bites with lazy, deliberate strokes that make your knees weak.
You’re moving before you even realize it. Joel dragging you across the room and down onto the couch with him, using the strength he’s built up after all these years to manhandle you until your thighs are spread wide on either side of his lap.
“Joel,” you gasp again, rearing back enough to break the kiss. “Your stitches–”
He cuts you off with a sharp nip to the sensitive spot behind your ear, tearing a high whine from your throat. “Can hardly feel ‘em.”
You make a displeased sound, but it’s undermined by the way you tilt your head to give his wandering lips more room. His hands find a home on your hips, one slipping beneath your shirt to press against the soft skin of your stomach.
His fingers splay wide across your skin, his palm callused and rough. His pinky just barely brushes the underside of your breast, and you’re suddenly rearing back.
“Wait,” you say, your voice barely a whisper.
Joel’s hands immediately loosen their grip on your hips, his brows knitting together in concern. “You okay?”
You nod quickly, your heart pounding in your chest. “I just...I need to tell you something.”
His jaw tightens slightly, but he stays quiet, waiting for you to speak.
You take a beat, chewing at the skin of your bottom lip nervously.
“I’ve never...” You pause, swallowing hard as your cheeks heat up. “I’ve never done this before. I mean, I’ve never been with anyone like this.”
Joel pulls back slightly, his expression unreadable as he processes your words. For a moment, you think he might pull away completely, but then he exhales a long, slow breath.
“Christ,” he mutters, scrubbing a hand down his face. “You’re tellin’ me this now?”
“I didn’t exactly plan for this to happen,” you snap back, crossing your arms over your chest defensively. “It’s not like I had the luxury of a high school sweetheart to pop my cherry out here.”
Joel’s gaze softens at your tone, and he reaches out to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing against your skin. “Hey, hey, I didn’t mean it like that.”
You glance away, suddenly feeling self-conscious under the weight of his stare. “I just...I wanted you to know. But I want this, Joel. I want you.”
His thumb stills against your cheek, and he swallows hard, his adam’s apple bobbing as he considers your words.
“I don’t...” He pauses, the most hesitant you’ve ever heard him. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
It’s the most vulnerable he’s been around you, round eyes shining with something so raw and so earnest it makes your heart ache in your chest.
“You won’t,” you insist, your voice steady despite the nerves fluttering in your stomach. “I trust you.”
Joel’s jaw clenches, and for a moment, he looks like he’s going to argue. But then he nods, his shoulders relaxing as he cups the back of your neck, pulling you closer until your foreheads touch again.
“At least let me do this right,” he murmurs, his voice so soft you almost don’t hear it. “Not here. Not on some goddamn couch.”
You blink up at him, surprised by the tenderness in his tone. “What?”
“Upstairs,” he says, his thumb tracing lazy circles against the side of your neck. “There’s a bed up there. It ain’t much, but it’s better than this.”
You can’t do anything but nod, your pulse racing beneath your skin fast enough to combat the cold night air seeping through the walls.
“Okay,” you say softly, voice barely above a whisper. “Upstairs.”
Joel stands, gently pulling you to feet and taking your hand in his. He leads you upstairs, each step feeling heavier with anticipation. The small bedroom is dimly lit, the faint glow of moonlight filtering through a broken blind.
The bed isn’t much—an old mattress on a worn frame, covered with a patched-up blanket—but it doesn’t matter.
Joel shuts the door behind you, the sound of the latch clicking into place sending a shiver down your spine.
“Last chance,” he says, his voice a low rumble. “You say the word, and we stop. No questions asked.”
Your throat tightens at the sincerity in his tone, the way he’s giving you an out even though you can see the strain in every line of his body, the way his hands flex at his sides like he wants nothing more than to reach out and touch you.
But you don’t hesitate.
You step closer, placing your hands on his bare chest. You bite back a smile at the goosebumps that break out all along his skin at your touch.
“Jesus, Miller,” you mumble teasingly, nails lightly scratching through the salt and pepper hair scattered along his chest. “How long are you gonna drag this out before you get it through your thick skull that I want to fuck you?”
"Christ." Joel huffs, shaking his head as the corners of his lips turn up in a small grin. “Like I fuckin’ said,” he starts, big hands kneading the meat of your hips. “Pushy.”
Joel walks you backward until the backs of your knees hit the edge of the bed, and you fall onto it with a soft gasp.
He follows you immediately, crawling over you, his body covering yours, his weight a comforting pressure. “I’ll take care of you,” he murmurs, his lips brushing yours. “I’ll make it good for you, I swear.”
His fingers are everywhere, unbuttoning your shirt with a practiced ease that has your pulse racing. His lips follow the path of his hands, each touch a branding mark, each kiss leaving you wanting more.
“Pretty girl,” he mutters softly, pressing a kiss right between the valley of your breasts.
You feel his cock stirring against your stomach, and it makes the ache between your legs flare to life, the weight of it, the hardness of it, driving you crazy with need.
You want him so badly you can barely think straight, but when his lips graze over your collarbone, you can’t stop the quiet whine that escapes your throat.
Joel growls in response, a sound that resonates deep in his chest, and you know then that he’s as far gone as you are. His hands slide down to the waistband of your pants, tugging them down your legs with urgency.
As your skin is exposed to the cool air, you can feel the heat of his gaze on you, like he’s memorizing every inch of you.
“You’re fuckin' perfect,” he mutters, his voice thick with desire.
Joel's hands find your thighs, parting them with a deliberate slowness that makes your breath catch in your throat. He positions himself between your legs, his body weight pressing you into the mattress, his chest rising and falling with the same frantic rhythm as yours.
The anticipation is almost unbearable as his fingers trace the line of your panties, the fabric damp with want.
“Jesus, she’s drippin’ for me already,” he mutters, voice rough, as he slides the material to the side, his thumb brushing over the sensitive swell of your clit.
Your body jerks at the contact, a desperate sound escaping your lips, but Joel doesn’t relent.
“You touch yourself down here, baby?” he asks, working tortuously slow circles over your clit.
"Please," you beg, your hands grasping at the sheets, pulling at them as if they can anchor you to the moment.
He looks up at you, his gaze dark and filled with an intensity that makes your stomach tighten. “Asked you a question, honey.”
You whine, high and loud in your throat as your thighs clench desperately around his wrist. “Yes, I touch myself.”
Joel’s lips curl into a satisfied grin, sliding his thick index finger through the messy wetness to slip inside your clenching hole, making you gasp. Your hands grasp at the sheets, pulling at them as if they can anchor you to the moment.
“Good girl,” he breathes, eyes darkening at the broken moan that bursts from your lips. “When’s the last time you touched yourself?”
Your brain feels hazy as you search for the answer, pleasure clouding your mind slow and sweet as molasses. “A–a few nights ago.”
Joel hums idly, slipping a second finger alongside the first. The stretch has you whining, his fingers a lot more to take than your own.
Your hands come up to claw at his shoulders, relishing in the way his broad muscle ripples and shifts beneath your greedy palms.
“Joel,” you whine, hips canting down against his hand impatiently.
He just shushes you softly, free hand brushing soothing circles along the skin of your inner thigh. “I know, honey,” he mutters, the pace fingers speeding up. “But I gotta get her nice and ready if you wanna take my cock.”
The gush of your pussy around his fingers is loud in the stillness of the room, a filthy wet noise that burns your ears each time he plunges them into your aching hole.
“I am ready.” Your breath hitches as your body begins to tremble beneath him. “Please, Joel—fuck—please, I need—”
“Need what?” His voice is thick with dark amusement, but there's a hunger in his eyes that has your stomach twisting. “Tell me, baby. What do you need?”
“I need you,” you rasp, your nails digging little crescent moons into his skin, your body pleading for release. “I need you inside me.”
Your hands grab at his hair, pulling him back up to meet your lips in a feverish kiss.
The pressure of his body on yours, the way his hard cock grinds against your trembling thigh, drives you to the brink of madness.
Your hands trail down his chest, past the waistband of his jeans, finally reaching the bulge straining against the fabric.
Joel groans when you rub him through his pants, feeling his cock twitch in response. He pulls back, breathing heavily, his lips curling into a smirk.
“Yeah?” he asks, his voice thick with lust. “You want my cock in this pretty pussy? Want me to show you how good it feels to be fucked?”
“God, yes,” you answer, desperation lacing your tone as your hand moves to unbuckle his jeans. “Want it so bad.”
He lets you push his pants down just enough to free his cock, and you gasp, your eyes drawn to the way his length stands, thick and hard, just waiting for you. The tip flushed an angry red, drooling pre-come onto the scratchy sheets.
Joel pulls his fingers from you, using his hands spreading your legs wider, positioning himself between them with such careful precision that you can barely stand it.
The head of his cock drags through the mess between your legs, slipping all the way down till it catches on your soaked entrance.
Joel pauses, looking down at you, waiting for your signal, but the only answer you give is a pleading whimper, your hands pulling at his shoulders, urging him to move.
His mouth captures yours once again as he slowly slides into you, the stretch of his cock filling you steadily, making you gasp into his mouth.
The slow burn of him carving a place for himself inside of you is almost too much, your body trembling as you adjust to the feeling of him.
“Fuck, baby,” Joel mutters against your lips. “You’re so tight, so fuckin’ perfect for me.”
As he sinks deeper into you, his thick cock finally buried to the hilt inside of you, the feeling is overwhelming. You gasp, nails digging into his back as the pain slowly shifts into pleasure.
Joel groans into your mouth, his hands moving to your hips, guiding you as he rocks gently against you.
The rhythm is slow at first, deliberate, as if he's savoring every inch of you. Your body quivers beneath him, every inch of your skin tingling with sensation. You clutch at him, your legs tightening around his waist, needing more, wanting more.
"That's it," he murmurs, his voice thick with desire. "Take it, baby."
You screw your eyes shut tightly, trying to steady yourself as he thrusts deeper, harder. The angle shifts just enough to make your breath catch in your throat.
Every stroke feels like it’s hitting the deepest part of you, sparking heat in places you never knew could burn so hot.
"Fuck," you gasp, the sensation too overwhelming, too much in the best way. "Joel... please..."
"Please what, sweetheart?" He pulls back slightly, teasing you with a slow roll of his hips before driving back in with a grunt.
Your nails dig into his shoulders, urging him to move faster, harder. "Don’t stop," you breathe, your voice trembling. "I need you to fuck me, Joel. Faster. Harder. Please."
The sound of skin slapping against skin fills the room as Joel finally picks up the pace, each thrust harder and deeper than the last.
Your back arches off the bed, chest pressing flush to his as your body coils tighter and tighter, already so close to the edge.
Joel reaches up to take your wrist in his, dragging your hand down to press flat against your lower stomach.
“Feel that?” he asks breathlessly, the speed of his hips knocking the dingy bed frame into the wall with every thrust. “You feel how deep I am?”
His own hand blankets yours, pushing down so you can feel the way his cock punches up against your palm on the next thrust.
Your pussy clenches desperately around him at the feeling, your slick lips dropping open on a loud moan.
You can barely hold on. The heat in your stomach tightens, coiling painfully as your free hand scrambles to find purchase on his skin. "I can't—I'm gonna—"
He grits his teeth, his jaw clenched as he drives deeper, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. "Come for me, baby," he growls, his voice dark and commanding. "Let me feel it."
With a strangled cry, you finally release, your body clenching around him, every nerve igniting in a white-hot explosion of pleasure.
You’re lost in it, your world spinning, your senses overwhelmed by the sensation of Joel’s body pounding into yours, the way his cock brushes against that sweet spot behind your clit enough to make sparks go off behind your eyelids.
Joel pulls out of your velvety warmth, hand coming up to fist his dripping length until he’s bowing over you tightly and coming with a deep groan of your name.
His release paints your stomach with milky strands of white, rope after rope of warm come claiming you in a way no one has before.
He finally collapses against you with one last shuddering breath, both of you breathing heavily, your chests rising and falling together in the quiet aftermath.
For a few moments, neither of you speaks, the only sounds are the soft creak of the bed and the quiet hum of your racing hearts.
Joel rests his head against your shoulder, his breath warm against your skin, and you can feel the tension begin to slip away, the weight of everything that’s happened between you both settling into something new—something different, but still there.
Your hand slips down the sweaty expanse of your stomach, your fingers swiping through the sticky mess of his release curiously.
“Christ, quit that,” Joel groans, tearing his eyes away from the sight to press his forehead against your shoulder.
“Why?” you hum, brow raised in amusement as you drop your hand back to the mattress. “Can you even get it up again?”
Joel pinches your side hard enough to make you squeal, your body flinching away from him as a surprised laugh bubbles from your chest.
“Watch it,” he warns, though there’s no bite to his tone. You only laugh in response.
The two of you settle into a comfortable silence, wrapped in each other as crickets chirp from outside the window.
Then Joel clears his throat, fingers idly tracing different shapes on the skin of your hip as he gathers the courage to speak.
A circle, a square, a diamond, a circle, a heart, a heart, a heart.
“I’m…” he starts, trailing off softly. “I’m sorry. I’ve been a real fuckin’ prick, and you didn’t deserve it. You never did.”
You turn your own gaze to his chest, hand coming up so you can trail your fingers along the jagged scar decorating his shoulder. Your touch featherlight over the rough patch of skin.
All the anger seeps from your body, a heavy weight gone until you feel so light you could float off the mattress and into the cold night air.
“It’s okay,” you whisper softly, so soft you think it gets lost in the quiet darkness of the room. “I understand now.”
And for the first time in what feels like forever, you both just lay there, tangled in each other, not worrying about the world outside, about the chaos that waits.
Just you, him, and the soft glow of moonlight.
tags are now in the comments! if you want to get tagged for any of my works just fill out this form!
mini nat's note: should i add joel to my taglist...i do kinda want to write more for him in the future but i'm not sure yet...lmk chickens <3 bee tee dubs sorry the ending absolutely sucks i could not for the life of me figure out how to end this LMAO
#— 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘢 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴 ♡#ᯓ★ 𝐧𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐣𝐨𝐞𝐥 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫!#natalia cant write anything under 1.000 words#pls be sweet to me#i'm so nervous to post this lmao#love you!#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x y/n#joel miller fic#joel miller smut#tlou x reader#tlou x you#tlou fic#tlou smut#the last of us x reader#the last of us x you#the last of us smut#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x y/n#pedro pascal smut
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Every single time Caleb talks about how the things he did were awful and irredeemable Astrid is internally screaming
Caleb failed on their graduation day
He made it through training, and yeah, did awful things
Astrid and Wulf passed that graduation, finished training, and spent 17 years in the real world doing the actual job
The parts too hard, too bloody, too dangerous, to trust to teenagers
Caleb knows Trent is awful and all of the terrible things he put children through, and every dreadful thing he is capable of, no question
But Astrid and Wulf, looking at him after the Mighty Nein? Not when he was in the Sanitarium, broken by Feeblemind, but a whole, complete person?
A wizard powerful enough to stand toe to toe with their master, and what did he do that they didn’t to get there?
He ate pastries. Wore bread as mittens. Made dick jokes and found love and forgiveness and people who may not understand, but who don’t care that they don’t understand and accept him anyway
People who looked at this sad, broken man with up to seven years of guilt and terrible deeds weighing him down (depending on when you think Trent started scourging ‘em, seemed young in the campaign but much later in the comic)
Knowing that they spent every one of the years he was in the Sanitarium and then after he escaped still under Trent’s thumb, still doing everything they’d done as kids and more, doing it with higher stakes, higher costs
And he talks about those childhood sins as unforgivable
He tells them that they too can be redeemed, as if nothing and no one could be worse than he was
But Astrid and Caleb are the same person
So you know she’s just as convinced that her sins were actually the worst, and there’s hope for anyone else but her
And she has the resume to back it up
And no matter how much she wishes she could have what he has, be free and redeem herself and maybe admit she shouldn’t have had to do any of it…
If Caleb doesn’t believe he can be redeemed, how could there be hope for her?
(And absolutely none of it will stop Jester Lavorre from scooping up another two formerly evil wizards and tucking them gently into her pocket and woobie-ing them to death with sprinkles and muffins and love)
look me in the eyeballs. astrid and caleb (imo wulf is a slightly different story but that's another post) are textually, canonically narrative foils. i think a better, less literary term-y way to put it is that they're variations on the same person. like. canonically. astrid is caleb if he didn't fail the training. caleb is astrid if she got out. they're like if you took one person and laid out two seperate options on how they would react to a major life-changing incident (hmm. i wonder what that might be in this context). astrid. caleb. they look at each other and see themselves. caleb is alright with this. astrid was holding on for her life for a little bit, trying not to lose her shit, because. he is who she would be if she was free and she figures that out during c2 yknow. caleb always knew that he was almost astrid so he just had to. like. look at this woman he loves dearly and fucking. wretchedly. and cope with the fact that 1. he loves her 2. she's awful 3. she could be so much better than she is 4. she's too far gone for that. but he's been coping for a long time, and she's not unreachable she's just. she's never gonna be him. meanwhile she has to grapple with the fact that she will never be as free as him- i don't know if she really wants to be, but he's proof that her life didn't need to go the way that it did and that's brutal. anyway. they're the same guy. it is so so important to consider that in relation to the dynamic they have going on. is this mic on
#critical role#critical role meta#c2#caleb widogast#astrid becke#my babygirls okay#you don’t understand i am feral for them#also wulf we love wulf but he learned to work out his muscles too and snuck some himbo energy#like yeah yeah essek and caleb are narrative foils we all know#which. means. astrid and essek are foils-in-law#and i think they both know that and they would both be much happier to admit how much they have in common with each other#because they both think caleb is better and closer to redemption#and the secret is the dick jokes it’s the only thing astrid and essek didn’t do it’s why they stayed evil for sure /j#(the secret is jester specifically liam didn’t think caleb would warm up to anyone until laura Assassinated Him)#(the others woulda got him eventually but laura grabbed him by the throat first session and said#‘HEY LOVE THE NEW EDGY CHARACTER WITH THE TRAGIC BACKSTORY LIAM#BE A SHAME IF SOMEONE… DREW DICKS IN HIS SPELLBOOK’#and liam lost his goddamn mind because he is also a chaos gremlin at heart)#trent can do all the scary traumatising training he wants jester can undo it with 3 texts and a dream#cuz she literally doesn’t fit in his worldview. like. fundamentally incompatible. she shouldn’t exist.#if trent was right and the world was as bad as he thought and all of his bs was actually necessary… jester woulda died in nicodranas#her just bopping around happy and carefree and It Works proves every single thing trent ever told them wrong#‘oh we must ruthlessly train you and destroy all empathy and torture you for magical power’#‘orrrrr have you considered loving your friend so hard he becomes a god nd just gives you cool magic?✨✨✨hey now watch me raise the dead!’#caleb and astrid are the same person and this is why jester fucking broke them both#jester lives in a different world to everyone else cuz until they meet her everyone assumes her world couldn’t work#but it does#cuz she had no reason to think it wouldn’t so she tried it anyway
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Does anyone else just sit and think about the fact that Six of Crows is literally the perfect book?
Like, we have a morally grey character who's actually morally grey and has a real reason to push people away other than "once I killed someone in self defense, so I'm a terrible person and we can't be together." And every other character has a super fleshed out backstory as well, including real world problems that don't usually get talked about in fantasy books.
There's just as heavy an emphasis on platonic love as romantic love, instead of "I can fix him", it's "he can fix himself", there's a gay couple that's actually happy and not suffering every five pages, and all of the gay characters have personality traits outside of the fact that they're gay.
And speaking of the romance, it's so not rushed or sexualized. No one even kisses in the first book, but it's still so obvious how much they love each other. Each couple has such a different dynamic, and the way their pasts mirror each other? Perfection. (I also firmly believe that Kanej is the best couple in all of YA prove me wrong)
And then the diversity??? 3/7 of the lead characters are POCs, 4/7 are queer, 3 have disabilities, 2 have addictions, 2 have PTSD, 2 are religious, one was raised in a cult, and it's not one of those books that has diverse characters just for the sake of being diverse!
The plot is so unique, especially among fantasy books, and despite the fact that there's so many moving parts, there is not a single plot hole. And the CK auction scene will forever be one of the best end of series climaxes I have ever read.
So basically I don't get why other authors even try anymore cause I'm sorry but no matter how great their books are, it's not going to be Six of Crows.
#this has been forming in my head for months and i was just waiting to find the right way to phrase it#but like tell me i'm wrong#six of crows#grishaverse#kaz brekker#inej ghafa#wylan van eck#jesper fahey#nina zenik#matthias helvar
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In a world of boys, he’s a gentleman
Luke Castellan x Apollo kid!reader
word count: a little over 1k
summary: you’ve had your heart broken many times, maybe the Hermes boy will be different
You have only ever wanted to be loved. For whatever reason you haven’t had much luck. Sure, there were many guys.
Callum from Ares. The only thing hotter than him was his temper.
Ryan from Hephaestus. He would forge copper to make you jewelry, little did you know three other girls had the same gift.
Ezra from Athena. Always thought he was so much smarter and better than you. Made you want to shoot your arrow straight at him.
Aiden from Hermes. A liar who couldn’t take anything seriously.
Elliott from Ares. Was dared by Callum to lock you in a dark room. And he actually listened.
Being the child of Apollo had its perks, but it more often had downsides. Your least favorite being your ability to fall in love so easily. After Elliot you swore off falling in love. A pain even you couldn’t heal. You couldn’t understand why nothing seemed to work out for you, you were a dreamboat!
A beautiful daughter of Apollo who glowed like the sun. Not only were you his daughter, you were his favorite, the hundreds of freckles on your face proved it. You were kind and generous, always willing to take in an injured camper from dusk to dawn. Your smile quite literally lit up a room. Perhaps you were too nice? Maybe they thought they could take advantage of your kindness?
Whatever the reason was doesn’t matter. You decided to take a page from your aunt Artemis’ book. No more boys, no more falling in love. Things will be easier this way. You know it.
You should’ve been at the bonfire with everyone else. You chose to skip it tonight because you wished to be alone, at the archery range. Maybe you’d earn another freckle if Apollo saw you practicing your already perfect shot. Luke should’ve been at the bonfire too, singing with your half-siblings and roasting marshmallows.
“Hey! I need some help!” A deep, painful cry said.
Immediately worried, you turned around and saw Luke Castellan holding his abdomen. You immediately run over to him, taking his arm over yours and getting to your cabin as soon as possible. You decided the infirmary was too far and you could use the cot in your cabin.
You slam through the cabin door and lay him on the cot in the middle of the bunk beds. “Lay down.”
You pull up his blood stained orange shirt to reveal a large gash on the side of his toned stomach. You held your hand on his abdomen for a moment to assess what happened. A second degree burn and large slices, as if by a horn, caused this.
“How did this happen?” You ask as you start to transfer some of the pain to a potted plant, causing it to wilt.
“Accident with a hephaestus kid, wrong place, wrong time I guess,” He says slightly wincing.
“I can take most of the pain but it’ll still take a while to heal,” You explain.
“Weren’t you supposed to be at the bonfire, leading a song with the rest of your cabin?” He asks.
“I could ask you the same thing, wandering around the blacksmiths. You know those things they make are pretty hot right?” You scoff at him.
“Yeah I guess I do now,” he rolls his eyes.
You begin to bandage the wound and give him a slice of bread. “Bread? What the hell is this gonna do?” he questions.
“My sister Melody made it, it can heal the burns for the most part,” you say.
“Aren’t you the girl who dated Aiden?” He asks bluntly, taking a bite of the bread.
“That’s none of your business,” You roll your eyes.
“If you ask me-” he begins to say before you cut him off.
“I’m not.”
“He was an idiot. All those guys were. I mean seriously, didn’t anyone teach them how to treat a pretty girl?” He continues, not fazed by you interrupting him.
“All those guys? You know about them?” You question.
“I guess. I mean after word got out about that shithead Elliot I did some asking,” he shrugs. You frown at the mention of Elliot.
“Whatever, they’re all in the past. No more guys for me,” you tell him.
“You shouldn’t give up entirely, these guys are stupid. There’s someone out there who deserves you, trust,” He assures you.
“Oh yeah? Tell me when you meet him,” You laugh.
“I think i know a guy, actually,” He responds, sitting up slightly.
“Oh yeah? Do tell.”
“Well, he’s tall, tan, and goddamn gorgeous. Has these soft brown curls, and I heard he’s the best swordsman at camp. Perfect for the best archer,” He explains to you, smiling.
“You seem to be fond of him, maybe you should go date him,” You joke.
“Nah, I think he likes this girl from Apollo. Kind, generous, beautiful, best healer and archer around,” He locks eyes with yours, darting between your eyes and your lips.
He holds your face in his hand, circling his thumb. His shirt rides up exposing his stomach and bandages.
“You like what you see?” He teases.
“You’re an idiot,” You smile.
“That seems to be your type,” he shrugs and knits his brows.
Before you can say another word he presses a kiss against your lips, moving them softly against yours. One of his hands stays on your neck while the other ventures down to your waist and then the chair you sat in. He pulls the chair closer to him and puts his hand back on your waist. You move one of your hands to his knee and the other to right beside him, leaning in closer.
“Fuck, you’re amazing,” He’s whispers into the kiss.
You smile at him before pausing. “The bonfire’s almost over, maybe you should head back,” you say.
“Yeah probably,” he gives you one last hard kiss followed by another few pecks.
He stands up and steadys himself, the injury clearly still pains him. He starts to walk away but before he can leave he turns back to you and presses a few more kisses against you.
“Okay, I’m done. y’know for now,” he smirks.
“You’re welcome anytime,” You laugh and he leaves. He gives you two looks before exiting.
Maybe you’ll give this boy one more chance.
#pjo x you#luke castellan#luke pjo x reader#luke castellan x reader#pjo x reader#luke pjo#percy pjo#pjo series#pjo fandom#pjo#pjo tv show#percy jackson#percy jackson x reader#percy jackson and the olympians#luke castellan x you
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𝜗𝜚。..❛ #02. XXX!
𐙚 topic。.hcs of random things that turn on hsr men
.。𝜗𝜚 cw。suggestive content, i wrote this with no brain, MINORS DNI
.。𝜗𝜚 a/n。aven, sunday, and blade. I wanna write for my bootyhill but i need to study him more to get a grip of him lol
#AྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིVENTURINE ⇢ rebuking his argument in a fight
。i js know he would go crazy when you do this 。he’d find people who just agree with him as boring. To him it may look even insincere 。but you? countering his smartly crafted arguments with irresistible logic with your pretty brain, glaring at him as you do with those adorable eyes? 。this man would go from being mad to being horny. tbh he would have probably already been horny in the argument 。nobody can be more masochistic than he is
“ARE YOU STUPID?” You glare at your boyfriend who looks nonchalant as he idly examines the coin between his fingers. “Fucking look at me. Do you know what happens when you join forces with them? You’re just risking the IPC and it will eventually lead to your unfortunate befall.”
You continue barreling on furiously with concrete points. Every time you prove him wrong, his eyes dance and he tries his hardest to bite back the grin that plays at his lips as you rant on. You are so perfect, he thinks- he is nonetheless impressed at you, your wondrous little brain. Something snaps inside of him when he sees you focused on derailing his points, your lips moving quickly to spit out syllables. He feels a loud moan caught in his throat.
“I get it, I’m sorry, princess, I won’t do it.” he suddenly surrenders and you eye him suspiciously as he advances, hands sneaking up to your back. “Let’s talk this out in bed, ‘m gonna apologize to you there.” He says softly, giving you lovely kisses along your neck but the way his fingers dig into your skin lets you know he’s not going to wait any longer.
And you will be confused as hell, because although you did win the argument, you feel like you just lost something else, a hidden little game he never taught you the rules to.
#SྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིUNDAY ⇢ whipped cream on your lips
。hear me out… i have a gut feeling he likes it a little too much 。ik it’s totally random but he will go nuts when he sees you bite down a particularly creamy cake that promptly smears its remains over your mouth- he tries to think of something more dignified, but he just can’t. His poor brain keeps returning to the most vulgar visuals of you. 。he will always point out whatever you had near your mouth when you two eat, because he’s such a clean freak, but anything with cream, specifically white whipped cream, he will be unable to comment on it and fall weirdly silent to he point you are confused why you not hear his scolding to wipe your mouth. 。he’ll just watch you eat dessert with a smile on your face as you savor the taste innocently. Unfortunately his brain is not, and he will start to feel his cock struggle under the fabric. 。”you have cream over your mouth, sweetheart. should i clean it for you?” he’ll sound restrained, like he’s being choked but his expression doesn’t waver. 。and after he found out his new obsession, he will literally only buy you huge whipped cream cakes for dessert.
“THE CAKE HERE IS SO GOOD.” You savor the taste happily and dig into the whipped cream cake and eat without much care. “Where’s it from?”
Sunday is too busy staring at you to register that. The creamy ring around your pink lips. It bothers him in a bad way. It’s making him feel like he is out of breath. His wings flicker wildly like a cooling fan, trying to blow off the heat that suddenly started to build inside his stomach like a raging primal flame that’s trapped by his own conscience.
You tap his shoulder gently and he snaps back to reality and tries to stare at your eyes instead, yes, lovely eyes, he thinks- your words phase in and out as he gulps, darting his eyes back to the cake.
“…the brand? The cake brand?” You ask again, frowning at his silence.
“Ah, yes, sorry, sweetheart. I was thinking of something else for a moment.” He breathlessly apologizes, the words spilling out a little too quickly like an excuse that makes your frown deepen in confusion— he closes his eyes and opens them again so the heat will ebb away. But his plans are obliterated when you take a portion of the cake and eat it, all while looking at him in the eye with curious doe eyes.
That’s when he can’t restrain himself anymore. He suddenly seizes your chin with his gloved hand, making you squeal in surprise when he practically devours your lips, licking up the cream residue around them roughly before shoving it inside your mouth with his tongue. The sweet cream melts when it gets to your mouth, mixing with his saliva that dips down your chin to make messy thick lines.
“It was from a shop at Golden Hour. I hope you like the taste,” he’d say as if he didn’t just feast on your mouth like a starved beast. “Me personally, i think it’s a tad too sweet.”
#BྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིྀིLADE ⇢ treating his wounds
。it’s ironic because Blade doesn’t want to be healed at all 。but how could he refuse you you’re frantically at his door with an emergency kit, worry written all over you- you are like a cute puppy that keeps following him around. 。he lets you do it reluctantly at first, grumbling about it inwardly 。but when you lift up his shirt with no hesitation to put gauze to soak in the blood, his muscles tense visibly, when your touch ghosts over his skin like tiny little lilies blooming in their wake. 。what have you done to him? He feels nothing but tension and something he didn’t want to register, something a little too pleasant to him. 。and at some point he will actually look forward to having his would treated by you. He still likes pain, but he likes your touch drifting over his bruised skin like an innocent butterfly way more.
“DOES IT HURT?” You softly pat the ointment around another fresh scar on his broad chest. It pains you to see that most of the scars are near his heart. You sigh like a worried mother. “You worry me.”
“I enjoy it,” he grunts in response, but his brain ran a quick recap. Enjoy what? The pain? Or your smooth touch?
“Stay still,” you say, and he does, as you carefully squeeze in another ointment into an ugly looking scar. His eyes never leave you the whole time, his muscles tense at the pain but otherwise he’s relaxed. His intimidating stare makes you scared a little, considering this mysterious man didn’t speak his mind often.
“I think that’s it,” you say, quickly trying to lower Blade’s shirt back- but the man grabs your wrist mid-action. You jump, confused. His eyes are unreadable but he states, “You’re not done.”
you frown in puzzlement. “I double-checked, im pretty sure I didn’t miss a spot.”
He lifts his shirt up and with his bandaged finger, cuts open the scar you just treated for him, making it ooze another layer of fresh blood around the dried wound. His lips form a rare smirk as he looks at your wide-eyed stare.
“There, you have a new wound to work on.”
He will do that until you are out of ointment, and the next day he will come visit you first this time with another set of fresh scars.
#𐙚.。articles#honkai star rail x reader#sunday hsr#sunday x reader#honkai star rail smut#hsr smut#aventurine x reader#hsr aventurine#blade x reader#hsr blade#sunday smut#aventurine smut#blade smut#divs by v6que & cafekitsune#div by chilumitos
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gets fucking stabbed by damian and my last breath still be like "it's not his fault ! he is ten and was raised to be murderous since he was born ! kid entered a household where everyone ignores my existence, i don't blame him for assuming that to be the norm and acting evil to me so that he assimilates to his new environment ! bro literally went through the worst all his life so of course the way he expresses himself is harmful to others !"
and then i get stabbed again lol
— masterlist !
OH MY GOD PLEASE 😭 the gaslighting yourself is real, i'm telling you.
unfortunately, the reader's toxic mindset of justifying everything your family does is a common scenario for every time one of them fucks up; only in the past though. the present chapters will have you slowly realize just nothing really is ever your fault. that you've never once been in the blame for the actions of your youngest brother.
but right now, i want to focus on why you just seem to let damian go about his own crazy path of targeting you. and it's either it's because you have nothing, nobody else to fight back with you, or it's purely because you allow him to.
to destroy you, to make you suffer, to make you learn that you have no place, or standing in the family. and if you do have a place, it is at the rock bottom.
this is what damian is taught: the weak should be eliminated before they fester into some type of unnecessary cancer.
you're weak, when he first saw you, when you first approached him with your tail tucked behind your legs and an invitation to hang out together with the scent of cookies wafting in the air— he knows that it is you who will make him weak.
you give him temptations to be a child, he's raised to fight against it. he ignores the unwelcomed feeling of wamth that blooms in his chest, those are feelings that gets you killed.
so it's how the story goes: he brings his sword up to your neck, and sways his hands swift enough to make a small cut to ensure that the first thing you associate him with is fear. and for someone vulnerable like you, it doesn't take much before you quickly submit to the prospect of your place beneath a trained assassin like him.
he ignores the sudden pang of his heart and the aching, gnawing dread that chews at his mind at the memory of your widening eyes and the wobble in your steps.
it's already damaging enough to have the youngest be introduced and immediately accepted into the family, but it's worse when he's significantly younger than you, a boy nearly half your age; someone you've always wanted to have, to care for, to help raise and cherish... despises you from the start, before you two even formed a connection.
someone you once called your younger brother, now became an enemy in opposing lines in a place called home.
what would've been fine-tuned jealousy towards him because he was given everything in a silver platter turned into shame that you couldn't even face him, not right after he threatened to kill you, no... and especially not after you've convinced yourself that if you couldn't even prove your worth for a young boy like him, then you really have nothing good to offer.
you give him the autonomy to think it's alright, that due to his upbringing, alongside your naive brain always justifying that your other siblings are right, and you are in the wrong— he was given every opportunity to torment you when you even go as far as being in the same room as him.
and i have my receipts on why you're just like that; all in the grace of low self-worth and self-esteem. past you reasons out that it's because it's always your fault.
you couldn't even find a way to save your mother, you couldn't even establish your place in the manor, you couldn't comfort bruce when he was still not over jason, what more could you be when all you see damian as is a young, broken child like you? that behind that veil of threats and weapons ready to attack you, is someone you knew could've been different, if he was raised right...
if he'd given you a chance to help nurture the softer, more humane part of him.
you've always wanted a younger sibling, not only from back when you were just with your mother, but also when you were introduced to the manor. because not only did it mean that you'll know how your mother felt when she raised you, but because you thought you'd have somebody by your side throughout the silent torment you've went through.
and when you're graced with one, who doesn't even consider you his older sibling; you let it be.
you let him be himself.
damian wayne, demon's granson, the son of the bat.
so many titles he's called, but never one where he's your younger brother.
it doesn't help that you justify his past, because the man you idolize, dick, does so too whenever you try to complain. his excuses are never out of malicious intent to have you suffer further— it's just that he never once actually considered you as important enough to bat an eye on, like how the rest of them treat you.
because you know that even dick has his limit towards the youngest member of the family; he just never reaches it when it comes to you.
so if you have a person allow another to act terribly towards you, but have another, a friend or family, who teaches you that it's not right, who fights by your side; it wouldn't take long for you to also learn how to defend yourself then. you'll gain confidence that you're at least not alone, that your actions are completely valid.
... but if you have an entire family that couldn't even scold the boy for leaving a scar on your neck, who brushes his mean comments about you aside, who isolates you even further with malicious words that you know becomes crueler when targeted at you—
then you have no basis for what is right, and what is wrong.
and that makes your authority, your trust in yourself dwindle like your already crumbling relationship with all the others the further you try to fight back.
that's when you learn what it's like to give up, all over again. if you accept his vidictive insults, if you know your place to turn back if you see him in the same room, if you knew from the start that sometimes trying doesn't equate to succeeding; then it'll at least numb the pain that comes after.
for the entirety of your life from when damian was introduced, that was how you coped—
but your life after the manor, after damian matures and learns softness, about empathy (that he's buried long ago during his training from when he was all but a toddler) on your situation; reading your journal entries because he still felt entitled to due to some hidden, twisted trait of possessiveness... that's an entirely different story.
would you still be as understanding as you were back in the past towards him? would you still force yourself to love the demon you saw as just a little boy? or would damian finally understand that it's too late to turn back time, to correct all his mistakes?
either way, if you were capable enough to change (at least, in his eyes), becoming an independent person (you think, huh? your place is at the manor), then maybe you could give him a chance too, to fix your relationship and build a bridge to an even stronger one.
one where you could finally baby him, like what you've desired. one where he could feel vulnerable, when he learned that it's valid to feel weak— it cuts back to the previous points: you make him weak.
and when he's out to find you after going through every single diary, every entry, after deducing that there's still a small spark in your that'll forgive him if he tries; he refuses give up any sooner if it meant replicating the same warmth he felt when he stood by your presence.
so... you wouldn't want to leave your youngest brother waiting for you, don't you?
after all, it's just like what your entries told him, right? this is what you always wanted, right?
a/n: everyone is entitled to their own feelings about how i portray damian and mc's relationship!!! i love how all of you guys have different conflicting reactions to this. it's all so complex for me, how damian sees you as someone who's weak and makes him weak (he's just a stubborn little guy), and you, who sees yourself in damian, alongside the added desire to just have someone to care for (because you want to so badly honor your mother's memory), and that person also caring for you is ARGH!!?!
i apologize for my long rambles (if anyone wants me to cut back on posts like this, just tell me), i'm sure everyone is anticipating chapter 5 and possibly (soon) chapter 6 (since the drafts, not the final work is becoming too long). but right now, all i could provide are my depictions of the reader's relationship with every member of the family. i love to churn scenarios where it feels like you're actually part of the family so i'm actually manipulating all of you guys to become attached to the characters too, just to add an extra layer of angst, hehe...
#🍨... yael's talking#🧁... yael's misc.#series: again & again#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere dc comics#yandere batfamily#yandere batman#yandere batfamily x reader#yandere damian wayne#platonic yandere#soft yandere#yandere angst#yandere#yandere x y/n#yandere x gn reader#yandere x you#yandere x reader#yandere x darling#yass queen we love characters with complicated emotions that you can never quite pinpoint!!!#<- aka damian wayne because the line between resentment and obsession is blurred. they're almost the same thing#guys ask more about tim drake too i have so many things to say about that nerd#actually i have so many things to say about each and every one of them...
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Oliver ranting about politics for 30 mins: that was a good talk (:
Me, who have said like nothing: (: nice
#miranda talking shit#Also: oliver: complaining that there are people who get money without giving the proper papers etc#Me: -crying bc i remember hpw fucking awful it is having to handle that and then still get called and questioned about it etc-#Oliver: what did i make you sad? Did i say something mean? Why are you sad????#Bro buddy... Im remembering the trauma of having to prove to the government im not mentally stable both by providing 15 different papers#And then having them call me constantly and wanting me to explain everything and i felt like some kind of impostor#I mean i get what he means theres probably a lot of people who gets money without providing all the correct things etc but like holy hell#Can also say theres probably a big amount of people who avoid even trying to get support they are entitled to bc they know its an#Exhausting battle. I probably wouldn't have bothered at all if i didnt get help from others to fix all the paperwork i needed to even apply#And even with that help it was so fucking daunting... Thinking about it gives me mad anxiety and makes me tear up its ridiculous :')#I could probably discuss this better if i didnt always feel like an impostor. I always feel like im faking everything and am abusing the#System and goverment money. Despite having add+autism along with deppression/anxiety disorders and i literally have doctors who have writtn#That miranda dont and cant function as normal people and need more help. Still im like... Oh no im faking... Im stealing...im a fraud...#I guess its bc its not... 'obviously' something wrong with me so i feel bad for even saying something. Its bc its me#Anyone else says the same things as me im like yeah thats understandable... But me? God no i am a waste of space and i should die
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Keep Your Eyes on Me
tara carpenter x female reader
part i | part ii
summary: You’ve quickly become close with all of Tara’s friends, but her trust issues keep her at a distance from you. But maybe you're able to chip away at her defenses...
word count: 2.2k
————
"I don't get why no one else is suspicious of her!" Tara exclaims looking around at everyone with a frustrated expression. "Mindy? You're literally suspicious of every living thing. And Sam what the fuck, you don't let me leave the house unless I'm carrying a cross bow or something," she exaggerates rolling her eyes.
"Why are we speaking about me like I'm not here?" You whisper to Chad next to you while ripping your string cheese into strands. He laughs but so does everyone else, seems like your whisper wasn't as quiet as you thought.
Tara groans frustrated and heads up the stairs, leaving her friends and you in the living room in an awkward silence.
Sam was the first to break it, "She'll come around, it's just been hard on her you know? Trusting new people and all that fun stuff."
You give her a nod completely understanding the root of Tara's issues with you, it wasn't personal but that didn't mean her distrust in you didn't sting. Especially considering it's been four months since you met the group.
"I am curious though," you speak, "She's not wrong Mindy, you're sus of everyone. And Sam why do you trust me too?"
"Well you met my brother playing pickle ball," the twin speaks. "Pickle ball doesn't really strike me as a psychopathic killer activity," she laughs.
"Neither does string cheese. Can you imagine Ghostface stringing their cheese and eating it?" Sam adds with a laugh.
You don't know whether to be relieved or offended that your habits don't indicate you to be a killer. But you're grateful that the rest of the group clicked with you quickly after Chad introduced you to them.
The core four minus Tara sometimes wanted to smack the girl across the head for being so oblivious and blind to you. Before you met the group Chad being the yapper that he is, explained all that happened in the past year and a half, so you were fairly well equipped with knowledge on how to navigate a friendship with everyone.
Everyone also noticed how attentive you were to Tara especially. You didn't know what it was but you immediately developed a soft spot for the girl when Chad told you all she went through. Meeting her for the first time you instinctively felt the need to protect her but that's been quite hard with her negative feelings towards you, but that doesn't mean you don't try.
————
Sam eventually goes up to Tara's room once everyone leaves and decides to put an end to this. The younger Carpenter looks at her sister from her bed when the door is opened at a speed where its hinges could fly off.
"Jesus Sam, why are we trying to break my door."
"What the hell are you doing Tara?" Sam gets to the point ignoring the question.
"What are you talking about?"
"Y/n."
"Ughhhhhh!" She turns around face planting into her pillow with a groan, hating the topic of you.
"It's been four months and you haven't once given the poor girl the benefit of the doubt." The sister says softly. "I don't know why you're so keen on hating her, it's like you want her to be Ghostface just so you can prove a point."
Tara turns around to respond, clearly annoyed. "Because it's so clear she doesn't have good intentions! I don't get you either sis, you want me to be cautious of people, but it's a problem when its Y/n?"
Sam sighs moving to sit on the foot of the bed, "Tara, do you not see how much that girl cares about you?"
Tara is silent and looks down at her fiddling hands not knowing what to say. She does know how much you care and she hates it.
All those times you would come over to her place with the excuse of "Mindy sent me to grab something" but you always stayed until Sam got home from work, just so she wouldn't have to be alone.
"Clearly you do realize how much she cares for you," Sam says taking notice of her sister's silence and demeanor.
Tara turns red recalling how you would always be attentive to the leg that Ghostface broke a year ago. You would always position yourself so she'd have access to the railing of a staircase. Offer to drive her places that may have seemed like too lengthy of a walk. Straggle behind the group when you realized she couldn't walk as fast as the others. And even deprive yourself of any physical activities that the group was participating in, so Tara wouldn't feel alone when she sat out.
"The damn girl literally sits in the kitchen whenever your hungry ass wants to cook something so you'd feel safer!" Sam suddenly says. "Even I hadn't thought about how being in the kitchen may give you PTSD."
Tara hadn't either. But now that she knew the reason why you'd sit with her in the kitchen, she realized that she did feel much more comfortable with you in there then the times you weren't. After all she did have her attack take place in the kitchen. The brown eyed girl shrunk into her sweater in shame as she recalled how poorly she treated you that day.
You leave the group who were playing an intense round of charades in the living room and decide to join Tara who was alone in the kitchen.
"Hey what are you making?" You smile.
She ignores you and continues to get the seasoning out for the mac and cheese she was making herself.
"Why aren't you playing with everyone else?" Tara suddenly spoke.
"Just wanted to see what you were up to."
"Well you can leave now," she rolls her eyes.
"I'm good, I'll stay here."
"You do know that you aren't winning any points with me by trying to talk to me and forcing proximity right?" Tara says with attitude. "I still don't trust you and if your goal isn't to kill me, but just to get in my pants, then I'm so sorry if I ever made you believe that you had a chance with me." she finishes sarcastically feigning a genuine apology.
"Not my goal," you reply keeping it short. You knew the girl would not receive anything you say, so you got up from the seat you initially took at the island in the kitchen and went to the dining table which was a little further away. Tara thought that you left since she didn't hear any comments from you anymore and her pride was too high for her to turn around and check if you were still there. She couldn't control the frown that was making its way onto her face. That was until she heard you scrolling through TikToks at the table and suddenly felt a sense of relief that couldn't be explained.
She would continue to finish her mac and cheese and tried to hide her laugh from any funny TikTok sounds she heard from your phone. And tried her hardest to shutdown her curiosity whenever she heard your laugh. As soon as she finished making her bowl, she walked out of the kitchen not even glancing at you. She was too stubborn to realize that she hadn't once thought about her attack due to your presence in the kitchen.
Until now.
"That's why I trust her Tara," Sam reveals. "She notices things that I don't. I can't always be watching out for you. You need to have a bunch who have your back, and for that to happen you need to take a chance on people here and there."
"Just think about it. Just separate your idea of Y/n being Ghostface and the possibility that she can betray you. And ask yourself what kind of person is left standing in front you. And is that the type of person you want to take a chance on."
————
Two weeks have gone by since the group last saw each other, and since then you and Tara were able to do a lot of individual thinking. Today the group decided that they went too long without seeing each other and they all decided to go to bar in downtown Manhattan.
Everyone decided to meet at the Carpenter residence, and Tara hated to admit it, but she was excited to see you, but she also felt nervous at the thought of being around you.
You were the last to arrive, and you greeted all your friends with a smile. Tara was waiting with a smile for you to greet her like you always do, but it never happened.
You ignored her.
"Is everyone ready to go?" You say looking at everyone except Tara.
The shorter girl had to compose herself before anyone realized that she was bothered by your lack of acknowledgement. She didn't know how to feel, what in the world were you doing?
The group made their way to the subway in one piece, and the two Carpenter sisters were walking side by side while everyone else was a little ahead.
"What the fuck is Y/n doing?" Tara whisper yells to her sister.
"What do you mean?" Sam replies playing stupid.
"She's not even looking at me?" Tara admits, not caring at how childish she sounds. "Why isn't she paying attention to me?"
Sam laughs at what two weeks of not seeing you and some deep reflection has done to her sister. "I mean what do you expect, it's not fair for her to keep trying for someone who doesn't make the same effort. She's probably done trying." Despite her words, Sam didn't believe a thing she was saying, she wondered what the intentions behind your actions were, but the Carpenter knew it was nothing ill.
Tara makes a hmpf sound, and tries to act unbothered by her sister's words. But the idea of you not having your gaze on her worries her more than she would like to admit.
Meanwhile 20 paces in front the sisters you and the twins are having a interesting conversation of your own.
"I can't do this anymore!" You whine looking at Mindy.
"Girl, stand the fuck up, it's been 20 minutes since we left the house, can't you see that it's already working?"
Chad chimes in, "Honestly I agree with my sister for once, she'll be yours by the end of today."
"W-whoa I don't want her to be mine or anything," you blush. "She's gone through a lot, I just need her to tolerate me, you know?"
Mindy rolls her eyes but smiles, happy that Tara has someone patient like you in her life. "Yeah yeah Y/l/n, now walk faster, it's not like she can run and catch up."
Your jaw drops while Chad drops dead in laughter.
Everyone manages to get onto the same subway cart in one piece, and you realized how much harder it was going to be acting like you can't notice Tara in here. The subway was packed from one end to the other. And you just so happened to be standing next to the only available seat.
You glance at Tara only to see her already looking at you and you immediately look away. Trying to get Mindy's attention you some how try your best to mime to her that you want Tara to sit in the free seat. Though of course Mindy's horrible charade skills translate into real life and she ends up sitting in the seat herself.
You face palm at your friend, and gave up on trying to look out for Tara. But in that very moment you notice a man getting far too close to the girl than you would like. It was a crowded cart so proximity was a given, but this seemed deliberate on the stranger's part.
Acting without thinking, you shove the guy as casually as you can to the side, not realizing that it meant you are now face to face with Tara. Just as you were about to break and speak to her, the subway doors open at your stop.
Tara hated that the doors interrupted the words you were going to say to her, but was grateful that it got her attention off of you before you could notice the blush on her cheeks.
As everyone got off the subway, you find yourself straggling behind the group out of habit. Just as you attempt to quicken your pace, you feel a tug on your sleeve.
Tara looks up at you with her big eyes, and you don't know what to do. This is the first time the girl has looked at you without rolling her eyes or looking away immediately.
"I'm sorry," she mutters.
You didn't know what to say, and continue walking with her by your side, so you don't fall too far behind from your friends. "It's okay," you mutter back looking straight ahead.
You don't blame the girl for her behaviours. Her traumas manifested into something difficult and she was making an attempt to be better. That's all that mattered to you. And maybe you were just too weak for the girl that you would let anything slide, but you were fine with that too.
Tara smiles at you, happy that you weren't giving her a hard time. Happy that you understood what those two words she just told you encapsulates.
Suddenly she grabs you by your arm and holds it as you walk side by side.
Startled by her touch you look at her.
She smiles up at you, "It's easier for you to keep your eyes on me this way. No need for secret glances."
next chapter
#jenna ortega#jenna ortega x female reader#jenna ortega x reader#jenna ortega x y/n#jenna ortega x you#tara carpenter imagine#beetlejuice#tara carpenter x female reader#tara carpenter x reader#tara carpenter x y/n#tara carpenter#scream 2022#tara carpenter x you#scream 5#scream vi#scream franchise#sam carpenter#sam carpenter x you#amber freeman#cairo sweet#cairo sweet x reader
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Eddie’s having a strange day.
For once in his life, he’s not being treated like absolute shit by all the dumbass jocks of Hawkins High School.
In fact, they’re not even engaging with him at all. They’re looking at him, but they’re just not saying anything. Even when Eddie pretends to drop his stuff in front of Billy Hargrove, he doesn’t even laugh at him.
And while this should feel like the best day of Eddie’s life, he has an underlying feeling that this is all very very wrong.
Then, he knows the universe has decided to fuck with him or something when Tommy Hagan meets him at his “business transaction” table and instead of buying anything, he leans in and whispers, “Meet me at skull rock after school today.” And fucking plants a quick kiss to his cheek.
And hey. What the hell was that?
Yes, he’s seen the way Tommy looks at Steve Harrington to know there’s no way that there’s not a part of him that wants him in a way that is definitely not platonic.
But Eddie isn’t Steve Harrington (who makes every guy feel a little bit gay) he’s Eddie Munson. And this does not happen to him.
But, he reasons with himself that, hey, maybe he’s in a coma or something and this is his only chance to see what life would be like if he was… liked? That doesn’t seem to be the right word, but he doesn’t know how else to describe it.
Or maybe the universe decided he needs a break from his horrible second senior year.
Doubtful.
Nonetheless, he decides what the hell, why not go to skull rock and see what Tommy Hagan wants, despite everything in his being screaming THIS IS A BAD IDEA!!!
And a few feet into the forest, he hears the quick crunching of leaves and sticks as something approaches him and is nearly startled out of his skin by Steve Harrington of all people.
“You need to leave,” Steve pants out.
Eddie glances around and wonders if this is real.
“Eddie, I’m serious. You need to leave. Right now.”
Eddie crosses his arms. “Why?”
Steve sighs and runs his hands over his face. “Oh my god you remind me of Henderson. Okay. The basketball team is planning to ambush you because Billy thought it was a good idea or something. I don’t know. I overheard it in the locker room. And you have to leave.”
Eddie takes a moment to let it all sink in. And yeah, it adds up with the rest of the day, but also… “Why should I trust you?”
“Huh?”
“You’re Steve Harrington. You’re on the basketball team. What if you’re part of the trap?”
Steve shakes his head. “I’m not really friends with any of them.” His head whips around when a cracking noise sounds out a good distance away. “Let’s go,” Steve says, grabbing Eddie’s hand and tugging him away.
Eddie plants his feet and stays in place. “You’re going to have to prove to me in some way that you’re not in on this.”
Steve runs a hand through his hair and pinches his lips together. “I don’t know how!”
“Then tell me why you’re going against all of them to help me.”
Steve’s brows furrow for a moment before he puts his hands on his hip. “Because I’ve been on the receiving end of a Billy attack and that was before he lost the little control he had over his sort of sister that like kept him weirdly grounded or something. But ever since, he’s been itching for a fight, okay? And he doesn’t hold back. He could kill you.”
Half of it doesn’t make sense to Eddie, but something about Steve’s tone makes him believe that he’s telling the truth. But there’s still a small part of him that wants to doubt him.
“Kiss me.”
“What?” Steve asks, exasperated.
“If you’re in on it, you won’t be able to. Tommy barely even got my cheek-”
“He did what?”
“And,” Eddie continues, ignoring Steve, “if you’re not in on it, you’ll know that this means literally nothing to the both of us, and I’ll run back to my van immediately.”
Steve stares at him for a second as if he’s out of his mind - which he is, really - before stepping closer and asking, “You’ll really leave? Straight away? No poking around the woods because you’re curious?”
“Yeah,” he confirms with a nod. He smiles at Steve’s hesitation and says, “So, you are in on i-”
Only for Steve to quickly close the distance between them, weaving his hands into Eddie’s hair and pulling him close as he kisses him deeply, lingering for a few moments before pulling away, breath coming out heavier than before.
They both stare at each other for a moment, neither of them saying a word until another crunching sound appears closer than before and a voice calls out, “Eddie?”
Steve takes Eddie hand and runs, only for Eddie to pull him the other way toward his van, still slightly not trusting him although he’s pretty sure Steve’s tongue may have grazed the inside of his mouth. But that’s a thought for a later day.
As soon as the van is in sight, Eddie lets out a deep breath, happy to see it’s untouched before he runs and unlocks it, yelling for Steve to get in before starting it and taking off.
Once he’s on the road, he turns to Steve and asks, “You think we lost them?”
Steve nods and sighs, “I hope they don’t find my car though.”
“Where is it?” Eddie asks, quick to turn around when Steve directs him.
He’s not far from where Eddie was parked before, but with the risk of being discovered, Eddie is quick to stop his car and tell Steve, “Go!”
But Steve takes a moment and looks back at him, and Eddie’s suddenly scared that maybe he read this all wrong and Steve really is in on the trap. But then Steve asks, “And what if I asked you to convince me to go?”
It takes Eddie a second to register what the hell he’s talking about before he’s glancing back at the trees, searching for any movement before leaning over and breathing out, “I have got to be in a coma or something.”
There’s a brief sharp pain in his arm that has him yelping before he registers that Steve pinched him. “Maybe not,” Steve says, leaning closer to close the distance between them again, deepening the kiss in the short amount of time they have and quickly pulling away, leaving Eddie desperate for more.
“I’ll see you around. Thanks for listen to me,” Steve says before hopping out of the van and running to his car.
Eddie takes a moment to breathe before realizing he needs to get the hell out of there, and he quickly speeds off wondering if this is real life.
-:-:-:-:-:-
The next day, things go back to the way they used to be, but any time Tommy sees him, he turns an ugly shade of red which is accompanied by laughs of, “Eddie Munson stood you up.”
It’s nice at first, but two periods in, he’s already had enough of the dumb jabs people take at him until someone knocks a notebook out of his hands and it goes flying toward a nice blue pair of Adidas.
Eddie bends down at the same time as the other person does, and they both grab the book. When Eddie glances up, he makes eye contact with none other than Steve who gives him a small, private smile.
“Harrington,” Tommy says in an accusatory tone that has Steve frowning before standing back up, leaving the notebook in Eddie’s hand.
As he walks away, he turns back and gives him an apologetic smile that makes Eddie wonder if this is what Romeo and Juliet felt like.
The thought makes his nose wrinkle up before he stands up and goes about his day as if he doesn’t know what it’s like to be kissed by Steve Harrington. And a big part of him hopes that maybe he’ll get another weird day where Steve Harrington plays hero for him. And another part of him hopes that if he really is in a coma, he’ll wake up with Steve waiting for him on the other side.
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Using Reverse Psychology On The Demon Bros
Warnings/Genres: manipulation(in a cute way, kinda?), mentions of diets (only in Beel’s part) fluff, crack
I feel like all the Brothers would fall for reverse psychology so easily. I don’t think MC would purposely try to manipulate them (at least not all the time), they would just say things that happen to make the brothers suddenly want to help them lol
Lucifer
-He’s literally the avatar of pride, if you wound his pride he’d be quick to try and prove you wrong
-MC: Lucifer can you help me with my potions homework?
-Lucifer: MC, can’t you see I'm extremely busy with paperwork for Lord Diavolo so that will have to wait for now
-MC: Fine, I guess I'll just go ask Satan, he’s the smart one anyway… *turns to leave *
-Lucifer: *is instantly standing in front of you within half a second looking all flustered and grabs your notebook from you* Let me take a look at that for you
Mammon:
-Even tho he’s a Simp for you he’s also a bit lazy so you’ll need to ask him multiple times for help when it comes to any type of hard work.
-MC: Mammon, can you help me carry some boxes from the attic Lucifer says we need to start getting rid of some of the useless junk up there.
-Mammon: Nah I got better things to do than menial labour for Lucifer
-MC: ok I guess I‘ll ask Beel to help, He can probably carry all the boxes in one trip, we’d get it done so quickly ☺️
-cue Mammon zooming up to the attic trying to stack all the boxes to prove that he can lift way more than his little brother.
Levi:
-Levi would definitely be the easiest to trick with this since he’s already constantly jealous of his brothers anytime they spend time with you.
-MC: Levi it’s my day to cook dinner do you want to come shopping for the ingredients with me?
-Levi: Sorry MC I’m on hour 9 of rewatching TSL, plus it's too bright outside. Why don’t you pull up a cushion and we can watch it together?
-MC: Oh that's ok I guess I'll go ask as Asmo, he’s been wanting to take me out on a date anyway *You close his door and start walking down the hall to Asmo’s room
-Levi: D..D..D.. Date! Wait MC no I’ll take you, I didn’t realize you were asking me out on a date, wait please come back!
Satan:
-I feel like he would also get jealous really quickly. Especially if you bring up Lucifer he would go full-on rage mode. Basically, anything that works on Lucifer will work on him too.
-MC: *pointing to one of the many books in his room* can I read that one? it looks cool.
-Satan: No MC it's cursed you could get hurt
-MC: ok *walks away*
-later MC is on the couch reading a book they borrowed from Lucifer
-Satan: *sees you reading the book Lucifer recommended, runs to his room to get the cursed book you wanted to read earlier* wait MC read this instead !!!!
-MC: but you said it was cursed
-Satan: it's fine I’ll figure out how to cure you just drop that other book NOW!
Asmo:
-Asmo would definitely get upset if you complimented someone else
-he wants to be the only one MC goes to for beauty advice
-MC: Asmo can you share your skincare routine with me?
-Asmo: My dear MC I can't just give away my secrets to looking this gorgeous *walks away*
-later at RAD
-MC talking to Simeon: Wow Simeon your skin is positively glowing what products do you use, you’re so beautiful!
-Simeon: *blushing* oh, let me show you, I use…
-Asmo who had been eavesdropping: *Grabs MC’s arm* MC why don’t we head home I have to show you how gorgeous I look when I’m doing my skincare routine!
Beel:
-I don’t wanna be cliche but reverse psychology would only work on Beel if it was about food
-Beel is always ready to help so there wouldn’t be too many situations where you’d get to use reverse psychology on him. Like if you asked him to help carry something he would do it, no questions asked.
- but if you wanted some of his food, especially if it was something special that he’s been looking forward to it might be a bit difficult.
-MC forgot their lunch and saw Beel eating in the cafeteria: Beel can I have some of your food it looks really good!
-Beel: *looks at MC and then looks at his food* uh this is the limited edition Goliath Hellfire pizza from Hell’s Kitchen each customer is only allowed to purchase 1 in their entire lifetime.
-MC: oh it's okay I just hadn’t had lunch today, I guess I can just go ask Asmo for some of his lunch
-Beel: *Grabs MC’s wrist to stop them from leaving* Asmo is on a diet again so there’s no way he has enough for both of you to get enough, here MC have some of mine *sits MC down and hands them a slice of pizza that's almost double the size of their body
(this one was a stretch cuz I feel like Beel would have given MC some food anyway but I couldn’t think of anything for him, but I also didn't want to leave him out)
Belphie:
-He is the definition of unbothered he doesn’t care if you go out with the others cuz he’s too lazy to go out but also he knows the moment you sit down he can just fall asleep on you and now you’re stuck with him
-but other than that I think he’d be just a little possessive of his nap stuff tho like blankets pillows etc…
-you know he has the best stuff so if you want to have a great sleep you’ll need to ask to borrow them.
-MC: Belphie can I use your fancy sleep pillow I can’t sleep
-Belpihe: *pretends to sleep on the couch so he doesn't have to give MC his favourite pillow*
-Mammon: Don’t worry MC come sleep on my bed it's crazy comfy you'll definitely fall asleep right away.
-Belphie: *Throws the pillow at MC and pulls them onto the couch to take a nap with him-Mammon: Hey they were gonna sleep in my room tonight!
#obey me#obey me! shall we date?#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me asmodeus#obey me satan#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphie#lucifer x mc#lucifer x reader#mammon x mc#mammon x reader#levi x mc#levi x reader#asmo x reader#asmo x mc#satan x mc#satan x reader#beel x mc#beel x reader#belphie x reader#belphie x mc#cute#fanfic#obey me imagines#obey me crack#obey me fluff#obey me scenarios#writing
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Mattheo x Hufflepuff reader
Before you even start dating his eyes always follow you around, looking at the way you smile at almost everything, your laughter, the way you cross your arms when your angry. Everything.
He doesn't realise he's basically in love with you so when you get partnered together he doesn't know what the excitement and happiness he's feeling is
This is the first time you've really noticed Mattheo because otherwise he was just another Slytherin for you
But once you do notice him, my god do you think he's hot. His chocolate eyes? Those gorgeous curls? The smirk? Yeah your fucking done for
Your in potions together and your stirring the wrong way but Mattheo doesn't want to say anything because of the cute look of concentration on your face.
Instead he looks down at you and takes the stirrer from you "It's this way sweetheart"
Oh my fucking god. When you hear his teasing words, and the word sweetheart your literally melting on the spot. Your cheeks are bright pink and your basically blushing like crazy
He LOVES teasing you about your height "Your like half of me" "I could easily pick you up" "Your so cute when you shout at me from down there"
Sometimes his teasing gets to you so you decide ignoring him is the best option. Of course that lasts a good 5 minutes "Look at me when I'm talking to you" "Don't think ignoring me is getting you anywhere, princess"
Once you can basically class yourselves as friends Mattheo asks you to come to the quidditch game wearing his jersey
"Come on sweetheart. I need my biggest supporter there" His eyes are wide and pleading so who are you to say no?
Of course after Slytherin win your so happy you give him a hug and god is he shocked. Like so shocked that he doesn't even hug you back.
"Sorry I...I was just happy for you" You back away awkwardly but Mattheo is finally realising how much he loves you
How much he loves staying up sneaking into each others dorms to finish homework together
Going into the kitchen for a midnight snack and seeing you on the way too
Getting you your first detention ever because you were talking way too loudly with Mattheo
After this realisation hits him, you have your first kiss in the middle of the fucking quidditch pitch but luckily everyone's mostly gone
"God I can't get enough of you" "I promise I'll treat you right darling" "Let me prove to you how much I love you"
Literally him rambling and waiting for u to say yes after he asks you out, slightly stressing because you haven't said anything (stressing a lot acc)
Once your dating he does not leave your side. He is so so so fucking protective of you like it's unreal
"Just because you didn't want to be mean doesn't mean I don't want to punch the shit out of him"
Whenever you walk down corridors he loves having his arm around your waist or holding your hand
To you he is the fucking funniest man on this earth, the little comments and sarcastic remarks always have you smiling and trying not to laugh or else it'll get to his head
Also he loves giving you his hoodies to wear because their like dresses on you at this point because of your height (their also super comfy which is why you end up stealing them)
You also can't lie to him. He can get anything out of you once he flashes those chocolate brown eyes at you
#mattheo riddle fluff#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle imagine#mattheo riddle x y/n#mattheo x reader#mattheo x you#mattheoxreader#mattheo x y/n#slytherin#harry potter
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