#like. embarrassingly bad
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Frantically studying maps
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well. this Did just make me burst into tears. (which is probably good since i've needed to cry for days.)
yeah. yeah That's how it feels....
#every time i talk to a friend or a casual acquaintance with The Bad Kind of autoimmune disease#you know like. the kind that progresses. or has already killed your kidneys. or whatever#and i wonder if theyre gonna hate me for not being dying anymore. yeah#i'm still crying. like embarrassingly hard.#thank god though bc my shoulder has been tearing all day and i havent been able to cry about it at all. Leave Me Pain....#chronic illness#cancer#autoimmune tag#hank green#dropout#pissing out cancer
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I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!!!
(WARNING!!! BADLY WRITTEN AND MAKES NO SENSE BUT I WANTED TO SHARE IT WITH YOU!!!)
Imagine taking Powder out for a walk around the undercity to pick up some supplies for your husband Vander.
You have your back to Powder while you talk to the shop keep, unbeknownst to you, Powder had been tinkering with one of her gadgets and pocketing old parts off the street and shops.
You finally turn back to Powder after hearing her panicking and a faint ticking sound when you realise that she accidentally activated it.
You immediately grab the home made bomb off of her- looking around to see if theres anywhere to throw it but you're surrounded by people and before you know it you curl in on yourself- confining the small explosion to yourself.
You fall to the ground, feeling your stomach burning- shards of metal from the bomb lodged into the raw muscle that was now exposed and colorful smoke surrounds you.
Powder stands above you, sobbing and panicking trying to help you get up- but you tell her to go get Vander and she nods before running as fast as she could away from you- you can barley hear anything around you and the crowd that was once around you had vanished.
The last thing you remember is the blurry figure of Vander running towards you in the distance, followed by four smaller figures.
My writing is absolutely ASS, so anyone who knows how to write and is willing to- pretty please do! Literally my posts are just to give other people ideas. (totally not because im desperate and suffering from Arcane)
If someone does write this, PLEASE write Vander and the kids taking care of Reader until they recover and Reader reassuring Powder that they aren't angry.
(The explosion was small by the way- but Reader didn't want anyone else to get hurt and thats why they locked in idk dude its 12:42 AM and im tweaking)
Hes so fucking hot dude
#arcane x reader#vander x reader#Yeah im tweaking#I wish i was high right now#And drunk#I love this man so much#I have like 3 drafts of me writing X oc stuff its embarrassingly bad#Why is writing so hard guys#Im gonna freak
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“Hey, you okay?”
“I…no.”
“Okay. Talk to me.”
“Phee…what if we made a mistake?”
“What?”
“There is hardly anywhere the Empire is not these days. What if something happens to one of us? To both of us? What if you go out on a mission for Vos and you are killed or”—
“It’s us, brown eyes. And it’s me. I’d like to see the Empire try to keep me down.”
“Then what if one day I wake up and I cannot remember you? Or the girls?”
“Then we’ll help you remember all over again. All of us.”
“But what if”—
“You were having that nightmare about Tantiss, weren’t you?”
“Yes. I…don’t want to…go back to being….”
“Listen, Tech Ninety-Nine Genoa: you are never going back to that ever again. I promise.”
For the day five prompt of ND Tech Week. I’m thinking it takes Tech a little while to get back home, and a little while longer to figure out who he really is. He still has some rough days, and worries in ways he didn’t before. Whatever happened to him, and whatever he did afterwards, was something he couldn’t control—and it kept him away for so much longer than he wanted. Still, every once in while it hits him how much they lost, and how much they got back, and in spite of everything he thinks he must be the luckiest man in the galaxy to have come out the other side. After all, better late than dead. As Phee always says. (Or did that one time.)
#the bad batch#ndtech2024#tech bad batch#phee genoa#techphee#I gave up trying to clean this up so#messy version be upon ye#I could not for the life of me figure out where Phee’s arms should go at like#any point of this#like not even because it’s a hard pose#it was an embarrassingly long time of just going ‘what is in arm and what do I do with it’#to clarify it’s ’ninety-nine’ as in the clone 99 and/or clone force 99#not the plan#I’m sorry I just realized I didn’t say that anywhere#tech lives#btw#this is technically canon compliant#there is literally nothing in canon that forbids this from happening anywhere#between the gang sitting down under that tree and the epilogue or afterwards
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“Nine would have treated Martha better than Ten did”
I need to talk about this argument that never seems to stop circulating.
Note: Not a venomous/anti post. There’s more than enough of that across fandom spaces as is, and this is supposed to be a place for ✨sweet, blissful escapism✨
When making this argument, people seem to envision a scenario in which Nine never met Rose.
While I can appreciate a good hypothetical, recognizing Rose's significance to the Doctor (Nine and Ten) is essential to understanding why things with Martha played out the way they did in the first place.
In the third series, the Doctor is grieving. This grief is deliberately threaded into nearly every script, whether spoken aloud or not (and these are just a few examples):
He's burning in Rose’s wake the entire time Martha travels with him, which is why it’s so frequently called upon: It’s 100% deliberate in framing his grief. He grieved as Nine too, of course— having been fresh on the heels of the Time War — but then he met Rose, which changed everything.
Back then, he was still a rude, traumatized pain in the ass, but we watch Rose soften more of those jagged edges with every episode as they grow closer; as he lets his guard down and forms a deep connection with her.
He falls in love (against his better judgment) and it's game over.
And yes: provided S1E1 had been titled 'Martha', one can realistically assume things might have unfolded similarly to how they did with Rose. However, it wouldn’t have been that way just because the Doctor was Nine and “Nine was different” — it would be because he wasn’t already in love with someone else. The same can't be said for the start of S3.
Think of it like this: if Rose AND Martha had been in that cellar — if Nine had taken both of them along with him in S1 — we’d eventually be looking at the most melodramatic love triangle ever, what with him living in close quarters with two brilliant, gorgeous, compassionate young women... But Doctor Who is plenty “soap opera” as is with just one woman in the TARDIS.
(I certainly wouldn’t object to reading that fic, though)
Now, regarding the unrequited elephant in the room…
His inability to be romantic with Martha isn’t because he thinks her lesser, nor is it for lack of compatibility. It isn't because Rose is any better than her. It certainly isn’t just because he’s Ten.
It’s really only for one reason, which can't be denied — and now I’m a broken record:
He is still in love with Rose.
(cut from a tenrosedaily gif)
Nine is Ten, and Ten is only such a mess in S3 because he’s just lost the love of his life. Martha merely got caught in the crosshairs of a volatile Time Lord in mourning, and yes — it sucks. Absolutely.
But it also feels dismissive to chalk Ten and Martha’s relationship up to little more than some sort of mindless dance of pining, jealousy, and toxicity.
Ten trusted Martha with his life over and over again — and hers, with him. He constantly praised her brilliance, happily carting her around time and space with no intention of letting her go. In the BBC’s extended universe of novels/comics/cartoons/etc, there’s so much depth to their relationship: love and trust and trauma and sacrifice. They had their own special bond as mates, their own complexities — so it’s a bummer that it's forever overshadowed by the other things.
I’m not denying that there was a lot of stuff that sucked/was for sure toxic about Ten's S3 behavior, but so many of the things I've seen him catching flak for can be directly attributed to being A Clueless Fucking Alien Idiot (not a trait that’s unique to Ten) — as well as his flat-out obliviousness to Martha’s feelings.
So yes, I agree: if Rose never existed, he would have treated Martha differently as Nine. He also would have treated her differently as Ten. Certainly.
But Rose did exist, and when discussing canon, it matters.
“He tells me that he absolutely, 100% loves Rose... He tells me how my daughter; my wonderful, beautiful, clever little girl saved him from himself before… And he says that’s all because of me! I made her into the Rose Tyler that saved him.”
-Jackie Tyler, Flight Into Hull!
Martha got the short end of the stick in S3. She came round at the wrong place and time, but that doesn't mean it was all bad. It doesn't mean the Doctor didn’t adore her. It certainly doesn't mean the time they spent together was wasted or worthless. They were brilliant!
Sure, he could be a twat, but let it be known that he was a twat with Rose as well, both as Nine and Ten. I’m sure Tentoo can be plenty infuriating, too. So while I'll defend Ten (and Tentoo) into the ground forever and ever and ever, I'll concede that he's fucked up.
The Doctor is a certified Pain In The Ass. It’s one of the things I love so much about this character — dynamics.
But never forget that Martha was goddamn tough as nails and overcame every bit of it. She moved on with her life, and the Doctor moved on with his. One can only pray that, when they inevitably drag her back onto the show (which feels inevitable if I'm honest), we see at once that she's been living her best life for all these years.
#I'm paranoid af about posting this but also feel like maybe two people will read it so perhaps I'm safe#doctor who#tenth doctor#ninth doctor#rose tyler#martha jones#baby's first meta#dw meta#I hope this wasn't just a mess of discombobulated stream-of-consciousness chatter#try as I may to avoid it#I'm somehow still aware of the sea of bad fandom vibes surrounding almost every character mentioned#besides Nine - who for some reason seems to be above reproach#there's a painful absence of civil discourse#especially where shipping is concerned#but let me tell you#I've vibed with T/M people about T/R and T/R people about T/M and it is a beautiful thing#I wish we could all just get along#also I've got so many more thoughts about this topic#like an embarrassingly long list of thoughts#I tried to scale it down as best I could while also being as inoffensive as possible#gonna crawl back under my rock now#also you should all go read Peacemaker#best DW novel since the Stone Rose#belated tag added way after the fact but:#for some reason I’ve yielded so much hate mail since originally posting this#because I suppose some people have only cottoned on to my enjoyment of T/M#but please note that I’ve been writing my T/M series since 2022#it’s had no bearing whatsoever on my love of T/R+T2/R aka the OTP of all time#but I’m also a grown-ass woman in my thirties and we are all playing with dolls here#I just wanna spread love and write smut and I do this for fun so if you can’t be nice - then I don’t want you reading anyway
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Can you talk about why you think blocking and moving on is a bad thing? I thought it was a way to curate your space and avoid drama
idk maybe i'm too idealistic but fandom is a much more friendlier, welcoming, supportive, creative, engaging, active, diverse and interesting space when it's treated like a community where people are encouraged to participate and talk about their interests and where there's space for niche or more unpopular opinions without these people having to worry about being blocked and feel unwelcome by the majority of the fandom they are in. i can't stand how blocking everyone you disagree with has become the first thing to do.
you say its 'to curate your experience'. but blocking people does not only curate YOUR experience. you're also forcefully curating other users' experiences. and not for the better.
people say 'i will block you for literally anything' and then those same people wonder why engagement is down, why no one sends asks, why no one reblogs, why rarely anyone talks in the tags anymore and why this place feels so dead and boring and quiet. i wonder why!!!!
people treat real people as annoying ads they can dispose of at their whim. but that's not how a fandom or a site like tumblr works. (besides, if you really care about people curating their own experience you wouldn't block people. you can filter and blacklist and never see them again while still granting them the same freedom instead of actively making their experience worse.)
you say its to avoid drama. but seeing a post you dont agree with is not 'drama'. and blocking is not solving anything except for you personally. fandom was more fun when we remembered that every user is a real person you share a space with, and probably some mutuals as well, so you find a way to live with each other. starting with a restraining order seems a bit excessive and is not contributing to anything. it's not that hard to be respectful and tolerate others and acknowledge people have different opinions and interests and still co-exist in peace. its not that hard to be nice to people and try to find common ground with them and interact with the stuff you DO like. you do this in every aspect of your real life, so why not online?
i hear you say: 'but that requires WORK and i don't NEED to do any of that bc i can just block them'.
yeah, you can try to create your own bubble and only hang out with like minded people but you wont EVER fully achieve that (no matter how much you block, social media WILL keep feeding you posts you disagree with bc it makes them money). social media WILL pressure you into an 'us vs. them' mentality where you constantly feel like everything online is a threat or an argument you have to win and where being mean and unnuanced gives you the most notes and where you don't even see, let alone be able to treat, other users as people anymore bc you don't interact with them anymore other than to block or fight them. that's not how i want it to be online. it's not fun to me. and maybe i'm a pessimist but i think it will eventually be the death of online fandom and sites like tumblr. look at the state of twitter right now. DOES blocking give you a better experience in the long run? i doubt that it does. overall, i think it makes people even less tolerable and more vulnerable to hate and fear mongering, and social media an even more hostile place.
it's everything i hate about social media and everything i want to fight against and WILL fight against. i won't pretend my meager contribution will change anything, but i LIKE to just scroll past posts i don't vibe with and not see every argument online as a personal offense. it keeps me curious. most posts aren't that bad when you know the person behind it. i mean, you do you, i'm not gonna say what you should or shouldn't do bc that's up to you, but i recommend it: free yourself of the block button and bring back supportive user communities based on a shared love for the same thing and focus on what you have in common with people, just like you would do in real life. save the block button for the rotten apples who DO keep trying to pick fights and exclude others.
(which is, now that i think about it, probably the main difference: most people see the block button as a neutral way to prevent worse. but. that's only the case on an individual level. and treating everything online as an individual choice to which there are no further consequences, especially if they happen on a larger scale, is already a loss.)
#i've seen so many posts lately that were like 'we need drama soon bc its too boring' and ?????? are we all just too far gone already??#we used to have graphic challenges and creative events during hiatus where everyone was welcome to participate why would you want drama#have we already forgotten how to entertain ourselves without having to point and laugh at someone#why do we keep treating others in bad faith just to feel better about ourselves#like. the people you have the most interests in common with arent even automatically the people you best get along with#i could go on but im embarrassingly cringe about this already so yes sorry i DO care about online spaces. a lot actually.
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Day four: Music.
An album cover featuring the characters Meta Knight and King Dedede.
“In a desperate attempt at returning to humanity, Meta Knight takes his fangs out. King Dedede looks on at the ordeal with guilt, ashamed he could not convince Meta Knight to do otherwise. King Dedede’s guilt is emphasized via the imagery of a bleeding heart. Said heart is his.”
#i know this is far-fetched (in regards to the prompt. and i apologize) but hear me out-#i hope it looks like an album cover. it’s supposed to be like a rock themed one#it’s more vampire metadede too. i apologize for being so self indulgent this week#cw: blood#tw: blood#cw: gore#tw: gore#if anyone needs anything else tagged just let me know#this is embarrassingly angsty#anyways.#meta knight with veiny wings supremacy. some of my headcanons are coming out this week#which isn’t a bad thing methinks#vampire meta knight#metadede#mtddweek2024#my art
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i suck at writing cause i can't put myself in the shoes of someone who lives in the wasteland (too much to think about) but also because i just suck at writing
i just wanted to focus on the gays
big Joe's death sent the war boys into existential crisis muaahahahahah
i think this would take place a few days after the new rule had been established since the big three are freakin DEAD and furiosa is the alpha.. i don't know what kind of system they would have but i guess it would be pretty free. Copper and Zinc are just taking a lil night walk, i guess, contemplating things
forgive me.... i am an amateur writer.. i don't even write.......... i can't think like a war boy....... what tthe fuck is valhalla..
#the dialogue is like embarrassingly bad#my stuff#brassposting#unironically one of my tags now#mad max#oc#i'm gonna do the death roll on them#sighhhh... sorryy...... this is a Brass blog now#joke#tthey'rr giving me a headache
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love seeing that the tag is trending. as if it means anything
#every time this happens there’s twenty inevitable: ‘was it renewed???’ posts and every time the answer has been no. we’re just insane#it actually just kinda hit me how embarrassingly bad the show being cancelled would wreck me like oh god this is why I don’t get attached#to things. oh yeah. fuck#im not uhhh pessimistic but I am. prone to anxiety and dread#genuinely wondering what’s taking netflix so long to give a yes or a no like there’s ought to be a reason right. are they waiting to see if#the streaming rates or reviews or overall popularity go up / sustain themselves??? did they decide a while ago and just aren’t telling us#for one reason or another? are they negotiating contracts or something? im going to wither away and die#rambling#dead boy detectives#if there is a god then we will get compensated for the wait by the announcement of confirmation for at least Two more seasons#wouldn’t that be something
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🐘🐘🐘🐘
#here you go can you please stop liking the one from a year ago now 😭😭😭#EMBARRASSINGLY BAD#elijah volkov#tem#camp here and there#camp here & there#chnt#the elephant man chnt#chnt fanart
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charles rowland is JUST. he's so kind and he's full of trauma and hurt and loneliness and he puts that into being as good as he can, and smiling and being the fun one because he knows edwin needs it and he needs it and he cares SO MUCH and he died maybe to protect a friend?? he needs to be of service even if it doesn't help him!! he's good and kind and smiles like sunshine!!!
#embarrassingly obvious as my other fave#like 1) bad childhood that he minimises the trauma of 2) smiles and is jokey all the time to keep his loneliness and unprocessed trauma awa#3) needs to be of service will give himself away if it helps others 4) so full of kindness and love despite the hurt he's grown up with#hmmm. shocking i like him so much#charles rowland#dead boy detectives
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Arcane is great and all but I just need arcane fans to know that Caitlyn and Vi aren’t even the most insane lesbian relationship in league of legends
#the sun and the moon are exes and one of them is trying to do a genocide of the others people#that’s not even an exaggeration#we also have middle aged gay men who are partners (in crime)#and are very. embarrassingly. bad at doing crime#also Ekko has like three other champs who flirt with him boy is Popular#and in a situationship with a guy in one AU?#arcane#caitvi
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am i insane or does the way 90% of the fandom characterizes farcille in no way resemble their relationship dynamic as depicted onscreen. idk maybe there's a bunch of stuff in the manga they're basing it on that I haven't seen yet? that seems possible. but like. the one who was very clearly actively thirsting in the hot springs scene was nottttt marcille. it's like people see marcille's general personality and therefore decide to apply Generic Shipping Template #39 but in this case the template is exactly backwards with regards to what we actually see in canon. genuinely, am I missing something here??
#dungeon meshi#it kills me cause marcille being desperately embarrassingly down bad with falin totally oblivious#is something I'd be having a great time with#IF it felt like it was true to the characters?? but it doesn't!#it's basically the opposite!#my stuff
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scara as herta (hsr) lol
#figuring out how to balance his pose took an embarrassingly long time#yes i started playing star rail just like almost every other genshin player#no i probably won't make fan art for hsr... although if i did i might make a separate blog for it#it's fun! but did it have to come out right before finals 💀#i'm working on something related to the interdarshan events but i'm so busy this is all i made recently#even this i had to work on this 30 min at a time for a couple days in between studying wow learning how to juggle tasks#also went through a depressive state in the past two weeks LMAO it was so bad.#every day!!! time passes!!!! i'm so tired
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If you’re thinking about watching the Netflix avatar the last airbender show, do yourself a favor and don’t.
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ray & gold dust // tuyaa, the rogue
#avatar the last airbender#atla#avatar legends#atla oc#ttrpg#yuanlingshan#kinda sorta idk iranian too maybe??? don't quote me on this#sandbenders#si wong desert#oc#vy's art#i am embarrassingly bad at clothing in general i think#most of this was bc i thought it'd be Cool™ and not because i was trying to lean one way or the other into cultural accuracy ngl#but it's like. kinda maybe sorta. yeah.#consistent art style? don't know her
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