#like yeah ok i lost my job how many fucking times have you been fired ah? or just quit cuz u hated it? huh

[eltehdork]

How can i be burnout when i dont do anything? Im so tired and im so unmotived but things are finally looking up i should be happy

The plumbing is almost fixed after damn near 2 months without it

I finally FINALLY have a job offer after 6 near 7 months unemployed

Ive reconnected with my neice and babysit and TRY to care for the house even though im not great with kids and i cant keep this house clean its disgusting and i dont even know where or how to start im so tired.

But things are supposed to be getting better. And yet...i cant do art.. I'd rather do anything than focus on art. Play fortnite, read a book, go outside and STAND there, hell i keep getting stuck scrolling YouTube shorts and i HATE youtube shorts they're BRAINLESS and YET

Like what the hell is wrong with me? I cant focus on my god damn PASSIONS. I've not updated my minecraft blog in like 2 months because i just cant focus on art and its tearing me apart inside. What the fuck happened????

[racew1nn3rs]

─ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘪. (𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦) 🍊

⤷ summary: saudi arabian and australian grands prix happen! y/n starts making vlogs for the races and it reveals more about her and a certain driver's feelings than she hoped, not that she notices. poor oscar's stuck in the middle of it all but he's trying his best!

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liked by f1, landonorris, and 55,007 others

tagged landonorris and oscarpiastri

mclaren saudi arabia, you were beautiful even if the results weren't! ready for what's to come

12,567 comments

user1 admin not using a single nice photo of the drivers 😭

user2 admin be honest is this your revenge era

mclaren well, yes!

user3 HELP MEEEE

user4 the way lando looks at her 😭

user5 this is a place of business

user6 oscar looks petrified 💀

mclaren dw guys we're still training him!

oscarpiastri wtf why would u say it like that, i'm not a dog

mclaren full-time team mascot, part time driver

user7 admin drop the insta your so pretty 😭😭

user8 no literally, content of her WHERE

mclaren ynusername 🤲🏼

user9 LETS FUCKING GO

user10 HER DISSING HER OWN TEAM 💀 THEY'RE GONNA FIRE YOU GIRL

mclaren they don't pay me to LIE

user11 CRAZYY

user12 LANDO IS NEVER GETTING A GOOD PIC EVER AGAIN 😭

mclaren what can i say, i am no mans peace 🥱

user13 icon

landonorris reporting you to hr

mclaren for what

landonorris idk harrassment or something

mclaren ok keyboard warrior, lets calm down 💀

user14 KEYBOARD WARRIOR HELEPSJSM

user15 i vote admin just takes over and we don't even get driver pictures

user16 real and true

user17 i fear we may have lost the plot

user18 thoughts on today's results

mclaren i'm trying to be positive in general but man

user19 LMAOOOOO

user20 ik the pr department is shaking in their boots after every post notif

mclaren probably! but unfortunately for everyone, i am going to keep doing whatever i want

user21 no more lando beef, mclaren admin?

mclaren i forget but i never forgive. i forgot why we were fighting but i stay hating bitches 🥱

landonorris literally WHAT DID I DO

mclaren IDK BUT IK U PISSED ME OFF 🫵

oscarpiastri diabolical photo choice

oscarpiastri i look like a little kid on picture day

mclaren so basically your everyday look

oscarpiastri yk what you are making this work environment very hostile

mclaren i can make it more hostile if you want 🤨

oscarpiastri nevermind!!!

maxfewtrell most flattering lando picture i've seen in years

mclaren that's saying something isn't it 🤩

user22 i went to haterville and they all knew you admin

mclaren they actually just elected me mayor there!!! 💪🏻

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liked by bsfusername, landonorris, and 17,800 others

ynusername if my admin duties don't kill me, i promise my caffeine addiction will! (:

3,422 comments

user23 be honest, how many coffees have you had today

ynusername 3!

user24 oh that's not that bad

ynusername +5

user24 JESUS CHRSUT

bsfusername at this point i think meth would be healthier

ynusername honestly yeah

ynusername thanks for the suggestion!!

user25 nooo admin don't do meth ur so sexy aha

ynusername that just made me want to do meth more

landonorris so what i'm hearing is buying you an espresso machine would get me in your good graces 😇

user26 oh brother here he goes

ynusername you must be deaf then

landonorris 😔 2 espresso machines?

ynusername i don't want ur dirty espresso machines 🙄

oscarpiastri now what car is that 🫵

ynusername SHHHHH

oscarpiastri TRAITOR

bsf2username when your not busy being super sexy on a race track, can we go thrifting and get sweetgreen and overpriced coffee 🙏🏼🙏🏼

ynusername this could've been an email, get this out of my comments 💀

ynusername but yeah obviously

user27 admin vlogs when 😔

ynusername SOON!!! very very soon

user28 mother feeding us once again

ynusername brb, adding single mom who works two jobs, loves her kids, and never stops to my resume

danielricciardo coffee recipe where?

ynusername in your dms now ‼️

danielricciardo is this flirting

ynusername no if i was flirting i would've told you to ask me in person, i'm just being charitable

landonorris can i get the coffee recipe too then 🤲🏼

ynusername wdy want next, my mugs? keep on walking charity case

user29 CHARITY CASE IS CRAZYDFHAJ

user30 she's so effortlessly funny and mean i love her

user31 i feel like this is so unprofessional /:

ynusername babe professional where, you are on??? my personal?? account???

user32 maybe she's born with it, maybe it's the fact that she's consumed enough caffeine to tranquelize a horse

user33 oh please the horse would be dead

ynusername call an ambulance, BUT NOT FOR ME ‼️💪🏻🗣️

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ynusername posted to story!

(caption: melbourne vlog out now on youtube, go watch!!)

15,221 replies

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would you like to watch? yes or no

now loading...

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"This thing better be working," could be heard slightly muffled in between vague shuffling sounds. After a second or two of incoherent noise, the camera footage finally came on. Y/N smiled at herself in the camera as the recording light blinked to life, and raised her hand victoriously. She grabbed the smile microphone in front of her and laughed, "It looks like everything is working. Thank God, I wouldn't have known how to fix it otherwise."

"Alright everybody, welcome to the first race weekend vlog hosted by me! Your favorite McLaren admin and social manager. It took me forever to figure out how I wanted to go about this, but now I think I settled on a format that will work," She explained as she walked around the small, clean kitchen that was within frame of the camera. She pulled a glass jar out of her cabinets and left it on the counter before pulling a jug of cold brew and a cartridge of milk out of her fridge.

"It is currently 7:30 A.M on March 29th, and I have a flight to Melbourne in 3 hours. I'm already packed and ready for this weekend, but I wanted to get an introduction filmed and I wanted to take a shower before I left." Y/N paused for a moment as she poured the coffee into her mason jar until she seemed satisfied and began to add some milk. "I am totally exhausted so this is probably cup one of like," she laughed, "I don't know seven probably. And this is a pretty big jar I won't lie."

"The race weekend doesn't technically start until Friday, so I'll be getting there a bit early, but I wanted to film some content before the race weekend gets really hectic, so McLaren is sending me a little bit earlier. I'm excited though! I love the heat, even if I live in London the antithesis of Australian weather," she taste-tested her coffee and hummed in delight.

"God I really never miss with this stuff," she said contently. "Anyway, it's a bit of an early start today, but I'll have plenty of time to sleep on the fight. I mean can you believe that London to Melbourne is a nearly 22 hours," she scoffed. "I vote that we start making all of the races in one place so I don't have to feel jet lag more painful than the force of 1,000 suns every other weekend. Not that I'm complaining," she chuckled awkwardly, "I love my job McLaren please don't fire me."

Abruptly an orange tabby cat came into the frame of the camera, causing Y/N to abruptly grab her glass jar in the hopes of avoiding a mess. She gasped, but laughed as the cat scampered off as quickly as it had come. She shook her head fondly.

"That, ladies and gentleman, was Cali! My cat. She's literally my baby, and I love her more than anything else on this earth. However, she does have an affinity for hitting things off of counters and breaking them. She also hates men and nearly all other animals, so she's basically the world's biggest hazard to society. She's a good girl, I love her." Y/N explained between sips of coffee as she stared wistfully past the the frame of the camera, where it could be assumed Cali had gone.

Abruptly an alarm went off and Y/N threw her head back with a groan.

"That means I have to get in the shower and get ready so I can leave on time," she said, before taking a few more sips of coffee. "I'm going to go do that, and the next time you'll hear my beautiful voice will be at the Melbourne Airport! Cue the travel montage!"

An assortment of clips follow. Y/N is seen dragging her luggage through Heathrow Airport. Y/N is seen ordering another coffee at the airport, finishing the coffee, and ordering another before her flight. Y/N is seen responding to emails from her airplane seat, editing video footage, and responding to instragram and twitter comments. Footage is shown outside the plane window of a cloudy, blue sky and a time lapse is shown as the sky grows beautiful shades of pink and red before becoming a starry-night sky. Y/N is seen cozy in a throw blanket and a travel pillow, presumably asleep with headphones on. Y/N is shown pulling her luggage through the airport once again, with a brand new coffee cup in hand. She smiles, taking a sip before she is seen settled down in a seat in the bustling airport.

"Twenty-two or so hours later and I have finally landed in Melbourne. I'm waiting for my Uber to get here so I can finally be taken to my hotel to drop my stuff off. I have a meeting with the McLaren drivers in two hours, but luckily I slept really well on the plane. I don't know how else I would be able to deal with Lando Norris. I'm going to finish this coffee in order to maximize my tolerance for the next few hours, but I suspect I'll be getting a new coffee before I reach that meeting. My addiction truly knows no bounds," she laughs, trying to ignore the people vaguely shown within frame that are staring at her speaking to a camera.

The camera cuts abruptly and the waiting screen from SpongeBob flashes on the screen, including the narrator's voice reading "2 hours later."

Y/N is shown once again in new clothes, a new coffee cup in hand, and luggage replaced by a small canvas bag. Her comfortable plane clothes have been swapped out for jean shorts and a plain white tank-top. Her hair is clipped back out of her face, and she is adorned with simple gold jewelry and light makeup.

Y/N smiles at the camera as she walks, bustling and talking heard around her, before whispering into the small microphone, "I have arrived at the McLaren garage. It is now time to meet with Lord Lando and workplace mascot Oscar Piastri," the titles slip off her tongue sarcastically and she doesn't bother suppressing an eye-roll.

In the next clip, Oscar and Lando are seen seated on either side of her as they sit in what seems like a board-room. Lando leans over and whispers something that the camera doesn't pick up and Oscar laughs while Y/N grimaces and reaches forward to readjust the camera. When the camera comes back on, Lando and Oscar are seated together on the left of Y/N as she faces on angle toward both them and the camera.

"Don't just sit there and look pretty, say hello to the camera boys," Y/N says and Oscar cackles at the disgruntled look on Lando's face.

"Is that your way of calling me pretty Y/N," Lando chokes out between laughs, and Y/N scoffs with an eye-roll.

"I was actually talking about Oscar, but whatever floats your little papaya boat Norris," Y/N deadpans and Oscar doubles over from the force of his laughter at the pout on Lando's face.

"That's not nice at all, I hope you know that. I think I am sitting here very prettily, thank you very much," Lando says, leaning into the girl next to him to speak into her microphone.

Y/N draws the microphone back, swatting him away, "Yes, yes quite prettily," Y/N mocks in a British accent.

Oscar, still trying to recover, joins in, "Pretty little Lando Norris," and Y/N laughs jovially, reaching across Lando as if the boy weren't there to high-five the Austrialian driver.

"Bullies, the lot of you," Lando mumbles and Y/N brushes off his comment without response before finally facing the camera.

"Anyway, welcome to the first McLaren race weekend vlog. I'm Y/N L/N, the best media manager in the whole god damn world, and this is Lando Norris, the biggest pain in my ass, and Oscar Piastri, the second biggest pain in my ass. How are you feeling about Melbourne boys?" Y/N questions, transitioning smoothly much to the British driver's chagrin.

"Feeling proud to be the second biggest pain in the ass and not the first. Probably the only time i've been glad to get second actually," Oscar comments and Y/N laughs as Lando shakes his head in disappointment.

"But in all seriousness it is good to be home, this is easily my favorite race of the year seeing as it's my home race and i'm looking forward to, hopefully, good results from our team," Oscar supplies and Y/N nods along to his words.

"Yes, Australia, we are in you and we are happy about it," both boys choked out a laugh at the manager's sexual innuendo and Oscar quickly covered his mouth with his hand so as not to react too much. "What about you Lando what are you feeling," Y/N questioned, leaning the small microphone to the boy.

"Feeling like that was a stupid joke. And also like I am going to be getting P1 this weekend. I can feel it in my bones."

"Leave my jokes alone Lando, you're not being paid to be a critic," she scoffed, "and if I recall, you said the same thing in Saudi Arabia not that long ago. What's changed now?"

Lando rolled his eyes, "What's changed is that we're in Australia now and I'm feeling much more confident."

"Well thank god for that," Y/N supplied unhelpfully as Oscar laughed.

"Now, what we really came here for, it's time to film a video for this channel, it's going to be a fan Q and A, I picked the questions. By the time this vlog is up, the QnA should've already been posted. So feel free to stop watching this and to go watch that or whatever," Y/N commented. "After that we're going to film a TikTok challenge," both and Lando and Oscar grimaced, but Y/N ignored their dismay at the idea of fiming yet another TikTok, so cue the montage! Filming time!" Y/N exclaimed and the screen transitioned to a new series of clips.

In the first clip Oscar and Lando were sitting in two chairs while Y/N sat across from them with a set of notecards.

"Lando, this question from user "ln4mania" asks, "Are you and admin actually friends? Or is the online beef real? The people demand answers!" Y/N reads off with a laugh.

"Do you hear that, the people demand answers Lando! Don't keep them waiting!" Oscar and Y/N laugh as Lando shakes his head and tucks his face into his hands.

"There is no beef, guys. Me and admin, or rather me and Y/N are just fine. We hadn't even actually met when that happened," Lando supplied between laughs. Y/N looked at the camera and rolled her eyes with a shake of her head, faux-disagreeing with the boy.

She ignored the simmering pit of disappointment in her stomach. She did in fact have a problem with entitled little Lando Norris who still gave her side-eyed looks and judgmental stares whenever he saw her. If that wasn't humiliating enough, Oscar had clearly noticed it too, which just gave Y/N the feeling that she wasn't being taken seriously at all now that Oscar understood Lando's lack of respect for Y/N. However that didn't matter in the current moment. All that mattered was making this video.

The next clip showed Lando and Oscar sitting at a table with bowls of water in front of them and towels strewn across a chair just within frame of the camera. Y/N stood behind them, hands rested in their hair as she reacted to the prompts being read by someone, an unnamed media intern, off-camera.

"Who is harder to make videos with?" The intern asked and Y/N huffed out a laugh as she let her hands fully grasp Lando's curls and push him into the water quickly. He sputtered, trying to blink the water out of his eyes as Y/N laughed at the wet-puppy dog look he was sporting.

Y/N tried to shake the ridiculous desire to let her hands run through the soft curls underneath her finger tips. Curse Lando and whatever stupidly good, rich-person hair routine he used that made him smell good and look good, and... whatever.

Lando, blinking water out of his eyes, was now undoubtedly certain that being damn-near waterboarded was worth it if it meant that Y/N would laugh like that again. He knew Oscar would harass him again later for being "down-bad" or something along those lines- as he had done every time he caught the man staring-, but as he caught a glimpse of Y/N's bright smile and shaking shoulders, he found he didn't really care.

The next clip showed Oscar, Lando, Y/N, and a laughing media intern as they all dried off- somehow all having become wet through the course of filming. Y/N dried herself off quickly, taking a sip of her newly refilled coffee, not seeing the way that only the camera and Oscar saw Lando stared at her until the driver was nudged back into focus on drying himself off.

A title-card once again came on the screen with white words on a photo collage of Australian grand-prix candids that Y/N had taken, reading "Race montage? More likely than you'd think."

Footage was shown of the free practice sessions. Oscar and Lando getting in and out of their cars. Engineers along the pit wall going over data. The team speaking incoherently, going over the game plan for Sunday's race. Oscar and Lando greeting fans, signing merch, and posing for photos. Y/N smiling and waving at a cheering crowd of people before staring at the camera incredulously with a small caption reading: "Omg she's famous your honor". More clips showed Lando laughing as Oscar tossed grapes and Lando moved to catch them with his mouth. Lando nearly choking as Y/N cackled in the background. Multiple clips showing Y/N with a fresh coffee, and another... and another, as Oscar's face in the background grew with concern. Zak Brown explaining to Y/N the dangers of caffeine overdose, and the need for moderation. Y/N explaining to Zak Brown that without coffee she would simply collapse and die, which the camera showed did nothing to ease her concern. Y/N getting caps signed by the drivers for fans and walking away with intricate friendship bracelets decorating her wrists.

And finally footage of the race. The engineers in the garage. The pit-crew changing tires. The cars racing past as Y/N watched attentively. Footage of the crowd as they cheered when the cars whizzed past. Smiling faces of fans. Y/N's cheers as Oscar and Lando passed. The smiling faces of McLaren employees as Lando and Oscar crossed the checkered flag in P6 and P8 respectively.

Y/N accepting hugs from both drivers, ignoring the burning sensation in her stomach as Lando wrapped his arms around her with a smile and a laugh. Y/N calling Lando smelly and telling him to go wash off if he wants to hug her next time, and him rolling his eyes at her fondly before making a face at the camera. The podium celebration is shown and Y/N smiles as the anthem plays, even though it's not for her own team.

The final clip is shown of Y/N in her hotel room, comfortable in sweats as she sits on the unmade bed.

"Not bad results this week guys! P6 for Lando and P8 for Oscar, which are good points for the team. I'm happy on my end, I think we got some good content filmed, and I am now ready to go to sleep so I can get home to Cali and my own bed quicker. I hope you enjoyed this video, and if you didn't don't tell me because I don't care!" Y/N jokes with a smile.

"Hopefully I will see you all at the next race, if not the race after that! Bye papaya fans, and be sure to follow us on instagram and all of the other social platforms!" Y/N exclaimed, gesturing to the list of the social media handles that appeared on her right hand side.

And with that, the camera cut to black.

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liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1, and 29,145 others

ynusername afraid to report that i fought jetlag and lost 😔 i did sleep for 25 hours straight after melbourne and i had no clue where i was when i woke up! shout out cali for waking me up 🙏🏼 best friend frl

9,547 comments

bsfusername i'm going to try not to be offended by that caption (love you bb cali) but FUCK YOU CAUSE I BOUGHT YOUR ASS BREAKFAST

ynusername my bad! s/o to that bomb ass omlette 🤩

bsfusername never doing shit for you again

user34 that vlog was god tier, how long did that take

ynusername it took 7 hours of editing and years off my life, thanks so much for asking 🥳

maxverstappen1 thanks again for those podium photos! you have a gift for photography 💪🏻

ynusername don't mention it! 👍🏼

ynusername (no seriously, mclaren might behead me)

mclaren beheading is so last year. firing squad. 🗣️

user35 not y/n threatening herself 💀

oscarpiastri suprised your body didn't naturally wake up for coffee

ynusername it did! just 25 hours later

user36 your poor cat was literally starving for a whole day? youre a horrible owner

ynusername let me introduce you to god's greatest creation: the automatic feeder!!! i'm sure they can mail one to whatever fucking rock you live under!

user37 PERIODDDD

user38 me personally? i'd never log on again

user39 she needs a personal channel 🙏🏼🙏🏼 i'd subscribe

user40 her cat is so cute 😭😭😭 gimme that

ynusername 🫵 STAY BACK HEATHEN, NO ONE TOUCHES CALI AND LIVES

user40 my bad fam 🧍🏻‍♀️

user41 i want someone to love me as much as she loves that mean ass cat

landonorris don't you have a job to be doing 💀💀 she slept through a full work day

user42 lando always on her ass and for whattttt

user43 obsessed obsessed obsessed

ynusername i had the day off! but not the guy who was streaming video games coming for me 🥱 talking bout get a job

user44 lando and y/n beefing on insta again? we're so back

user45 at this point instagram comment beef isn't enough, they need to duel or some shit

user46 the caffeine addiction almost got her guys

ynusername i wish it would, then i wouldn't have to work with lando's annoying ass

landonorris I CAN SEE YOUR COMMENTS???

ynusername THAT'S THE POINT

user47 honestly just give her a gun atp, these men test her too damn much

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user48 NURSE 🫵 SHE'S RIGHT HERE

user49 no fr, like let's get back to bed grandma

user50 OP, are you concussed?

user51 no actually cause didn't y/n just say she wanted to khs working with him 💀💀

pastryboy81 that sign can't stop me, because i can't read!

user53 OK I ACTUALLY SEE THE VISION

user54 ARE YOUR EYES CLOSED???!1!1

user55 i fear i totally get it 😔

user56 it's giving enemies to lovers, secret relationship type vibe lowkkkk

user57 no deadass like he hugged her reallll tight

user58 she also hugged oscar 😭😭?? and he has a whole gf

user59 the way she shoved him off and told him he reeked not 5 seconds after 💀 delusion is a disease yall

user60 someone call the f1 gossip pages cause 😗

user61 more like someone call the ward cause somethings real off with yall 🤨

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sorry that this update took forever, i had surgery and recovery has been rougher than i expected! hope you enjoy!!

please leave your thoughts in the comments and feel free to drop a request for your fav in my asks <3

-

𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

@lemon-lav @slutforpopculture @m4rt10ne @urfavsgf @sadsierra2 @96jnie @sltwins @poppyflower-22 @alliumiae @livelovesports @liberty-barnes @the-holy-trinity-l @iliwyss @awritingtree @redpool @elliotts1one @velentine @chaoticmessneutralplease @5sospenguinqueen @charizznorizz @2pagenumb @mxdi0 @cwiphswmwasohmm @tremendousstarlighttragedy @lnspipedrm @itseightbeats @tinycoffeeroom @woozarts @personwhoisther @a-beaverhausen @love-simon @annabellelee @ravisinghs-wife @chezmardybum @greantii @weekendlusting @monserelates @sapphiccloud @halleest @deamus-liv @gigigreens @morenofilm @laneyspaulding19 @lanireadss @dear-fifi @moldyshorts1997 @oliviarodrigostan13 @eugene-emt-roe @ilivbullyingjeongin @im-a-ghost666

[blackjackkent]

As mentioned last time, Sendai's enclave is pretty standard dungeon crawl, lots of enemies to kill, not a lot of story. Our first dialogue crops up with this lady, who Sorcerer's Place tells me is Sendai's high priestess.

Caden has vague flashbacks to his adventures in the Underdark and his brief time masquerading as a drow there. Perhaps if they had thought to do that again here this all would have gone more smoothly. But probably not.

Man, these people are all so rude.

The Ogremoch in question appeared to be a giant earth elemental and (even by super easy mode standards) didn't seem to be a particularly hard fight. Our hostess, however, is unimpressed:

Yeah I'd talk a big game too if I was hanging out with a FUCKING BEHOLDER in my back pocket. 🙄

Anyway we beat her up too, beholder and all.

The next room has more extremely unwelcoming people.

Man, if me beating up the high priestess with her pet beholder wasn't enough for you people, I really don't think ANYTHING is going to impress you.

Excuse me, what?

Huh. OK, so Egeissag has a beholder as well, and this one is sassy.

What.

Also, mono-ocular is real false given how many eyes are on the end of all those stems.

Anyway Caden thinks this is a terrible idea.

LOL.

This is, objectively, a super stupid idea, but also death by archer firing squad is not, like, BETTER. That geas concept is so creepy though; how awful would it be to be a spectator in this situation.

This beholder clearly has some sort of Russian-roulette death wish, too, since presumably it's included in the people who would die if Egeissag lost.

None of the companions on either side object to this, which feels odd under the circumstances, but maybe Caden's friends also realize they're stuck in a no-win situation. And, I suppose, they trust him to get the job done.

Caden is not really adept at the concepts of single combat fighting to the death; I wouldn't really say this is where his skillset is centered. But...desperation can make a man do many things.

...apparently the beholder didn't die with the rest after all.

ROFL.

OK, that was the most personable beholder I've ever seen. I would have been okay with them sticking around to chat more...but I'm also okay with them going far away.

Meanwhile, Sendai is getting increasingly agitated about our rate of success against her people:

Oh, goodie, a mind flayer. As if we weren't dealing with enough abominations today.

[arithmeticanimaniac]

tag someone you want to know better

tagged by @romanceyourdemons

favorite color: bright pink (also any happy color)

last song: the last song i deliberately played was either “Almost Like Being in Love” by Nat King Cole or “September in the Rain” by Dinah Washington, but the last song that came up on shuffle was “Juliet” by LMNT

last movie: either around the world in 80 days (2004) or inception (2010)

currently watching: the last season of archer (2009)

other stuff i watched this year: lmao i actually have a lot of half baked reviews in my drafts but i never posted them because i’m almost always at my queue limit so here’s my chance to do a rapid fire round of reviews (based entirely on whether i enjoyed them)

how to marry a millionaire (1953) 👍 too many people forget what a comedic genius marilyn monroe was

Love Sarah (2020) 👍 🥲 a bakery, romance, grief and healing, intergenerational bonding, what more could you want

My man Godfrey (1936) 👎 boring

bringing up baby (1938) 👎 it has its moments, blueprint for disney channel show shenanigans

memories of the sword (2015) 👍 sooooo melodramatic

The Dig (2018) 👍 haunting

the misfits (2021) 👍 it is Not Good, but inexplicably charming

Free guy (2021) 👍 responsible for the resurgence of mariah carey in my playlist

Papillon (2017) 🤷🏻‍♀️ hard to get through but not bad

Chungking Express (1994) 👍 i’m not usually an atmospheric film type, but wow

The Lost City (2022) 👍 i had fun

The French dispatch (2021) 🤷🏻‍♀️ tried watching this multiple times, fell asleep each time but the fact that i tried multiple times means it goes on this list

most of the movies in the DCAMU (2013-2020) 👍 i saw a gif from Teen Titans: the Judas contract (2017) which led me to watch 11 of these 16 movies lmao curse you tumblr

Blue crush (2002) 👎

the Batman (2022) 👎

Lost in the stars (2022) 👍 the whole thing could’ve been avoided if (spoilers) were lesbian, but anyways it made me want to visit hainan and shanghai

Dumplings (2004) 👍 i mean i can’t eat dumplings anymore without gagging but

the burning sea (2021) 🤷🏻‍♀️ i remember laughing at the cheesiness (idk how accurately they translated from norwegian), but solid disaster movie

alive (2020) 👍 korean filmmakers really know zombies, but mix in quarantine era

Palm Springs (2020) 👍 went into this blind expecting white lotus lol (very much not white lotus)

The babysitter: killer queen (2020) 👍 i can only do horror if it’s campy horror

the menu (2022) 👎 well made movie, not for me

blockers (2018) 👍

joy ride (2023) 👍

Spider-Man: across the spider-verse (2023) 👍

king arthur: legend of the sword (2017) 👍 i don’t care i enjoyed its ridiculousness

Austenland (2013) 👍 it’s so bad!! i laughed, i cringed, i awww’ed

the tuxedo (2002) 🤷🏻‍♀️ better enjoyed in highlight clips

Matilda the musical (2022) 👎 if i hadn’t seen the danny devito version i might have enjoyed this

heathers the musical (2022) 👎 the off bway actors were better

Mayhem (2017) 👍 samara weaving and steven yeun! another movie apollo threw a covid dodgeball at

Charlie Chan at the wax museum (1940) 🤷🏻‍♀️ could’ve been good, hard to watch with the yellowface and racism

Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (2022) 👍

shows i dropped this year/didn’t finish: justified (2010), killing eve (2018) , gannibal (2022), beef (2023), doom patrol (2019)

currently reading: bel canto, but mainly just a lot of medical articles

currently working on: finding a new job because hellooooo 2 year itch

current obsession: ok so if you look at english language sources, most say that pregnant onions are toxic and therefore not edible. however, the medicinal value of pregnant onions is apparently not uncommon knowledge in other cultures (fuck yeah china and south africa). so a family friend gave us a few mature plants that make into soup and i picked off the little seedlings and have been tending to them. that led to spending more time tending to my other plants (i have a lot more loquat trees than i remember) and now i’m trying to air layer some stuff. TLDR; gardening

tagging anyone who wants to do this :)

[i-am-brandon]

my life story chapter 9

That goth girl who thought I was a stalker showed me her boobs on the internet and never wanted to talk to me again. Let’s talk about other negative stuff in my life, I used to work at a pizza place, it was called lamppost pizza, there at lamppost pizza I was a bus boy, it’s not driving a bus I know that now, I don’t know if that’s a good joke, I don’t drive, lets see 1 of the customers didn’t like me, why you might ask, 1 day I wanted to watch a tv at work, what did you watch Brandon, I watched the movie idle hands, what’s that, it’s a scary movie, o yeah who’s in it Jessica alba, I liked her in that movie, 1 customer however did not she said to me I don’t know if this is the exact thing she said to me change it this movie is inappropriate, I didn’t want to change it but I did, which bummed me out because I like inappropriate stuff, people at work liked certain music, o yeah like what, Tom petty, yeah we all liked listening to that at work, is something negative gonna happen next Brandon, yes, o really like what, everybody got fired, o really for what, it wasn’t anything they did, nope, it got replaced by another pizza place called Selma’s pizza it was s deep dish pizza place, so I got fired everybody lost there job because of Selma’s pizza, I tried to get a job there they said to me do you have a degree in what cooking pizza I don’t know but no I didn’t I don’t know if I was even a college age so I didn’t get that job, remember blockbuster if not it was a place where you could rent movies and video games, I tried to get a job there, I didn’t get that job and blockbuster doesn’t have stores anymore maybe I don’t know where, I don’t remember what video rental store I went to 1 random day, and I remember seeing beetlejuice, and I thought what is that, I didn’t know what to think of the character, than they had the resident evil character Jill Valentine in the store and I thought I like her and i probably stared at Jill valentine she was made out of cardboard but also don’t stare at girls, back the girls would say to me he’s just a pervert, I don’t want to be just a pervert, that’s not all I think about, I’ve been talking about video games I think about that too, I could think about food, movies, music, who knows go many different thing’s. Than there was another video game store they went out of business and they also didn’t hire me. Target didn’t hire me. I used to work at the Amazon warehouse, they fired me for sexual harassment, what did I say to nun girl or I think it was a text message and I’ve learned you have to delete those text messages or it’s evidence, and don’t do that, I don’t remember what I texted her and I don’t know why I said that, but don’t do that, I don’t know how to talk to women, that might make me more loyal, I went to Utah 1 time to snowboard with Christians they shared the money for the bus trip there, my brother Ryan also wanted to go snowboarding, on the bus people watched Seinfeld the show seemed ok, people might of played Texas hold ‘em, I also met a drummer on the bus that person seemed ok and I don’t remember what they said to me, I might of played a dice game that basically you try to not roll a 7 or an 11 maybe it was 2 dice so I kind of did that by myself, my brother said to me on this trip he said no one gives a fuck about what you think, i may or may not of thought that he was talking about himself and he didn’t like that he couldn’t become a football player i think he wanted to make money playing football and he didn’t get to do that that might be why he said that to me I think I had no reaction to it, I wonder if I thought why did he say that, my brother Ryan is 1 of the most selfish people you will ever meet, also my brother Ryan used to do drugs and alcohol, it took him a really long time to quit that stuff, and then he got really religious, my brother Ryan wanted to go camping 1 time with my brother Travis who doesn’t like camping, I may or may not like camping it seems boring, my brothers didn’t like that camping areas don’t usually have Wi-Fi, that may or may not be negative.

[morethanmeetstheass]

alright, let's do the lowdown of "where the fuck has suna been all this time." probably gonna be long so ill put a keep reading, but tldr: life got bad, life got better, im working on existing in fandom space again

SO. i cant remember the last time i posted, so let's start at where shit went bad. 2020 baby, the rona hit, i graduated college virtually, lost my job, and ended up having to move to another state bc new jobs were so hard to come by. started anew down here in maryland, though a little worse for wear bc i went from living with my 4 best friends to having exactly 0 friends. very isolating, no fun. got cats, one of them died, so that didn't help at all.

fandom-wise, iacon online was both a huge benefit in my life and a huge pain. a lot of stress and misery went into that convention, but a whole lot of good came from running it. i ended up getting the chance to do 3 covers for idw, which was a massive blessing. became friends with multiple members of the cybertronic spree, made new friends with other organizers, got to accidentally roast james roberts to his face.

but it was also very stressful, and admittedly, my love for transformers did a huge swell and then took a big hit. i spiraled into a weird pit of having no interest in anything, lost interest in writing my fic, and started exploring other parts of my life. especially when idw lost the license to transformers, because fuck, now if i want to do covers again, i gotta make MORE connections. i was just very tired and burnt out. started hating all my artwork and despising how i was drawing for validation instead of passion.

sort of accidentally became a prominent creator on tik tok, so i got to explore other parts of my life that got lost in the transformers shuffle. got a new job working remotely, adopted another cat, things were looking up. then my apartment had a fire and i spiraled again, even worse. my mental health still hasn't recovered. it is a miracle that my belongings, health, and pets were ok, but i didnt even feel safe in my own home anymore. still struggling with it almost a year later, even in a new apartment. its been hard.

but i was shuffling on spotify today and stumbled onto my blitzbee playlist, and i got a little twinge in my tummy. i miss transformers. i dont miss being completely consumed by it, but i want to reintroduce myself to the fandom, start making mecha art again, as well as other art.

and i swear on my life, i WILL finish my fic. even after all this time, i still read all the comments i get on roe, on aufn, and especially kwz. i see how many of you want me to finish it, and i want to too. and i will. itll just take me some time to reintroduce myself to the fandom, to get comfortable with creating out of a place of love rather than out of a place of need for external validation. roe was a passion project, and its so clear with how much it was loved. it was good bc it was made out of a place of excitement, out of me genuinely wanting to share the story, not just wanting the likes and kudos. and im feeling that passion again. not 100% just yet, but i am.

so yeah, thats the deal. life has settled. still suffering with post traumatic stress from the fire and trying to feel safe in my space again, but im improving. im finding love for transformers again. im finding love for a lot of things again, and i dont want to box myself into one passion or the other. im a lot of things and i want to give myself space to love all of the things that i love. and robots are one of those things, but not the only one.

blitzbee forever. i will die a dirty bee kinnie and a blitzy simp.

[spectral-kitkat]

Miraculous Rant.

Where the hell do I begin…

Season 1:

The show was decent in season 1. Some episodes were just mindless filler and probably weren’t needed in the grand scheme of things but they helped us get introduced to the characters, we got to know the plot and the world our characters inhabit. It was good. The love story between Adrien and Marinette was cute and off to a touching and fluffy start.

Season 2:

This season was immediately better than season 1. It had character development, it went more into detail about the lore surrounding the Miraculous and we got to learn more about our characters and their families and the villian’s motives. (HM really went from “I wanna destroy the world” to “I wanna wake my wife from the coma she’s in”).

We got to see new heroes which was fun! We got new characters like Luka and Kagami.

The season finale was epic! The Miraculous team all taking down all the previous villains in the show was awesome. At the end we even got Mari kissing Adrien on the cheek. It was great! (Even though it clearly reset itself in season 3 cause it’s never mentioned again)

I really enjoyed season 2 and it’s probably my favourite out of the 4.

Season 3:

Season 3 was kinda good and kinda bad. We had some great episodes but this is where the show took the wrong turn.

Marinette lost some of her character in season 3. This was the start of her descent into being the Queen of Mary Sues. It’s also where she was crowned the Queen of Stalkers! Her character took a fucking nose dive in this season. We had so many moments that just creeped me the fuck out.

1. The ENTIRETY of Puppeteer 2 🤢🤢🤢 I could not stand that episode. When we reached the dreaded statue scene I physically had to pause it like 10 times. That scene takes about 3 minutes to watch… it took me about 20. I cringed so fucking hard because of the secondhand embarrassment I was feeling. That was not sweet, it wasn’t romantic, it wasn’t the least bit cute… it was a train wreck! It was creepy and stalkerish and it’s a wonder Adrien even spoke to her again after that atrocity!

2. LB delivering the present in Chat Blanc. Two words: STALKER BEHAVIOUR!!! I genuinely could not believe my eyes when I saw LB run her hand across everything in his room and then actually SNIFF Adrien’s pillow. Like WTF!!! 🤮 I’m pretty sure whoever was responsible for that scene clearly thought it was the equivalent of when someone gets their S/O’s jumper or something and it still smells like them. But this turned it up to the nth degree and way passed the line of sanity.

Adrien was extremely under-utilised in this season. He didn’t really do anything. The only episodes we got about him didn’t really focus on him. ‘Felix’ whilst focusing on Adrien’s family didn’t really feature him. ‘Party Crasher’ while a beautiful mess was more about Mari trying to get into the party than the party itself. ‘Chat Blanc’ again focused more on Mari trying to fix her mistake.

We got even more heroes in season 3, not in the right order but they were there. It was fun seeing everyone’s transformations.

Season 3 was also the season of destroying redemptions. The big one obviously being Chloe. Season 2 was setting up this amazing redemption for her and before it could go anywhere it was wiped off the face of the earth during the finale (and don’t worry we’ll get to that dumpster fire later). Gabriel also had any remaining sympathy ripped away from him. How did the guy who stopped Gorizilla from letting Adrien die when he only thought he was CN go from that to using his son like fucking baseball in Chat Blanc when he knew his son was CN. Like I knew you were a shit father but you still cared about Adrien in some way shape or form but after that episode I can see I was clearly mistaken!

Before we get to the finale I want to talk about probably my 2 least favourite episodes from this season: Desperada and Reflekdoll

Desperada:

I fucking hated this episode! The only good thing was Luka getting to be Viperion, other than that this episode was awful!

Marinette was a selfish cringey bitch. Completely ignoring Luka to gush about Adrien to Jagged. Brushing Luka off as soon as Adrien turns up. Immediately cuddling up to Aspik and flirting with him when she needed to focus on the akuma (something which she has told CN not to do many times before)

Adrien, I love you kid but Jesus Christ you were a dumbass in this episode! Aspik’s design was terrible! Aspik himself was awful. I know Adrien tried his best but dude you were given the Black Cat miraculous for a reason! He shouldn’t have tried to be Aspik but even when he did he should’ve called it quits after like 5 resets not 25,913 times.

The only person with a brain this episode was Luka. So well done guitar boy, gold star!

Reflekdoll:

This episode was annoying! It was basically the start of the Marinette can do no wrong streak! When they have to swap miraculous I was happy cause it meant we got to see new outfits and see how they each handle the different powers. It would also serve as a way to get LB and CN to see what their partners role is first hand. Until we actually get to it…

LadyNoire is of course amazing and needs no introduction to using this new miraculous that she’s never used before. She’s cocky and confident and basically just LB in Chat’s costume with his powers.

Mister Bug on the other hand is just useless. He struggles with this new miraculous (like anyone would!) and is stupid and goofy. He has to rely on LadyNoire to solve the lucky charm. They swapped miraculous so shouldn’t that mean that Mister Bug should get the lucky vision and the creative powers that the earrings give him.

Overall Reflekdoll is awful. It was shitty writing and the start of Adrien getting the short end of the stick.

And now the season 3 finale… Just what the fuck. That is my only reaction: what the fuck!

Chloe you poor fucking child! What did they do to you!!! So much potential SQUANDERED!!!!

What was the point in bringing in all these different superheros with unique skill sets, costumes and transformations if you were just going to immediately reveal them to the main villian so they can’t be used again. That’s stupid! If you wanted the shock value that is “Oh no HM knows some of the heroes identities!�� Then keep it as only some. Have like Max, Kim and Kagami outside trying to find somewhere to hide but unfortunately they get hit. Or Nino and Alya are hiding but the windows open and they get hit. Have some of the heroes hide so they’re fine! Taking away every ally of LB and CN’s was a stupid move! (Even if they wanted Alya to become a spy have her as part of the like 4 that get revealed or something, it’s not that difficult)

Season 3 was 50/50 for me

Season 4:

So I know season 4 isn’t even halfway through yet but so much is wrong with this season already that I need to vent!

So my biggest problem with this season of Miraculous: Tales of Ladybitch and Rena Rouge, I mean Rena Furtive… shit, Chat Noir! Is that CN is basically pointless! Adrien has been flung over a rainbow and is only remembered when he’s needed as

1. Marinette’s love interest

2. Someone for LB to shout at

3. A plot device

He has basically been sidelined. Partners my ASS!!!

Adrien is being blown off by pretty much EVERYONE! It’s coming to a point where this poor sweet summer child is going to crack! And it is not gonna be pretty… I definitely feel like the writers are leading up to a big fight between CN and LB which will probably end with Chat Blanc 2.0.

I REALLY HATE MARINETTE/LADYBUG!!!! In Season 3 I said it was the beginning of her descent, well in season 4 she’s done it. She’s descended, she has hit rock fucking bottom. She is so unlikable I don’t actually care about her as a person. She has entered full blown stalker territory it’s only a matter of time before she starts killing people for even looking at Adrien! Not to mention that Miss Mary Sue here can’t do anything wrong! She never has to suffer the consequences of her actions, she is always perfect no matter what she does… it pisses me off!)

She’s the Guardian now big whoop. I know what it feels like to be stressed and under pressure so I do understand why she needed to tell someone about it all. I just don’t see why that person had to Alya! Especially considering she has someone by her side every akuma attack going through pretty much the exact same thing. I know she’s worried about CB happening again but as I said before the more she leaves him out the more she is actually pushing that to become a possibility! Plus it makes sense for them to reveal their identities now since LB is now the guardian it’s probably a good idea to know who holds the cat miraculous, she knows everyone else’s identities!

Even if she didn’t want to tell CN her identity she could still explain the situation to him. If she didn’t want to tell him anything (which she doesn’t anyway) then instead of Alya she should’ve talked to Luka! Her boyfriend for all of half an episode (thanks writers…). He’s so sweet and caring and clearly loves her so much! If she wanted someone to confide in then why not choose the person you clearly wanted to date but couldn’t because of that very reason! (Yeah I know it’s kinda a moot point now since Luka knows both identities but still). He wanted to try and comfort her so it would’ve been the perfect moment for it. That way you could still date him and he’d know why you had to suddenly leave dates halfway through! But no break the boys heart instead!

Adrien and Marinette were both such fucking idiots in the first 2 episodes. Like why would you start a relationship with someone when you know your heart isn’t in it! That’s called leading someone on and is a really shitty thing to do to someone! No wonder Kagami and Luka ended up akumatized!

Another aspect of season 4 I don’t like is Rena Furtive. Yes ok having a spy for your side is a good strategy but when said spy basically tells an important member of a duo that the 2 person job doesn’t involve them… it just really ticks me off! Alya you are the sidekick to LB and CN! Chat isn’t!

Miraculous specials:

The Miraculous World specials suck! Shanghai is better than NY but still has its problems. Both specials add nothing to the overall plot/lore of the show apart from trying to set up some weird cinematic universe…

NY special:

One of the worst things I’ve ever had to sit through! The plane scene alone I paused a few times. I want to say well done to Mari for trying to move on from Adrien (especially considering I’m pretty sure she’s dating Luka at this point) but I can’t help but think it’s just to give her character some pointless development that goes nowhere and doesn’t actually develop anything!

LB can pretty much fuck off at this point! I hate her! She put all this shit on CN (like she doesn’t know exactly how that feels). It’s like why does she get to go off on holiday but CN can’t. LB should’ve stayed in Paris for 3 reasons:

1. She’s recently become the guardian meaning it would probably be best that she stayed with the Mircle Box

2. She’s the only one who can purity the akumas

3. If she’s so sure about being the boss then she should take responsibility of Paris and the citizens.

What really pisses me off about her is what she says to CN during the big fight. “I can’t trust you”… surely you could have this conversation afterwards since you’re supposed to be focusing on taking down the villian! Plus everyone bashes Adrien for giving his miraculous up in this episode but look at it from his point of view: His partner and best friend just said she couldn’t trust him which in turn caused him to cataclysm someone and essentially kill them. That’s gonna take a toll on anyone, especially a 14 year old! He probably thought in that moment. “Ladybug needs a partner she can trust and someone who won’t mess up and kill someone. She needs a better partner.” It makes sense he renounces his miraculous! I’m just upset that in doing so he loses Plagg who is pretty much his only friend who actually understands what Adrien goes through at home.

When Uncanny gets CN to come back, LB acts like it’s not her fault in the first place that he feels inadequate! She didn’t even apologise for saying what she did! He apologised for lying about not being in Paris but nope LB wasn’t in the wrong at all and didn’t have anything to apologise for 🙄… (yes the LadyNoir hug was amazing but I just wish it was under different circumstances!)

Also are we not gonna mention Gabriel Agreste almost starting WW3??? He wanted to launch a fucking missile!!!

Shanghai:

As I said before, this special is way better for several reasons.

We got MariChat! (Best side to the love square imo). This special actually had some semblance on a plot. Fei, whilst a bit op, was a cool character. It was nice to see Wang Cheng again.

However once again there were many problems.

A big one being Marinette yet again! (What a shock! 😒 I’ll come back to this). Another was that once again HM’s motivation has changed. How is getting the Prodigious gonna help bring back Emilie??

Back to Marinette… The fact that the words “Huh?! There must be some kind of mistake! I always know what's up with Adrien! … His 5 first names and every corresponding name date, his yearly schedule, even his shoe size! If there were anything to know about him, I would know it!” come out of her mouth whilst she is flipping through his schedule that she keeps in her pocketbook is a hugh red flag!!! That is not cute or adorable! That’s messed up and Adrien needs to fucking run and maybe possibly go into witness protection… Marinette is a full blown stalker! Not to mention the GPS she has (that could just be the find my friends app on iphone but still).

It also is extremely rude of her to use not only her great uncle’s birthday but also a lie about wanting to know her Chinese heritage in order to go to Shanghai to stalk her obsession, I mean crush. This could’ve been avoided if the Dupain-Chengs were going to Shanghai for the purpose of celebrating Wang Cheng’s bday and then Adrien just so happened to be in Shanghai.

Also this means LB left Paris without telling CN! I know CN did the same but again he can’t purify the akumas. Plus he has a reason he couldn’t stay in Paris, Mari just went cause her crush did. Great guardianship there Marinette.

This was also the last time CN actually did something. Even if it was for a short while before LB and her female partner took over (the beginning of a theme…)

Other things:

There are 2 other things that I wanna say but felt they needed a separate bit.

In Furious Fu, Su-Han has a rule book that he uses to tell Marinette which rules she has broken. At the end of the episode he tells her that is she breaks 1 more rule that he will take the Miraculous and the Miracle Box off her, which fair enough but wouldn’t it be helpful to leave the rule book with her?! How can she be wary of not breaking anymore rules when she doesn’t even know what the rules are??

Now the big one: Master Fu…

Where do I even start with him. He is so fucking manipulative!! He is Asian Dumbledore!

He decides to leave these extremely powerful jewels in the hands of 13 year olds! Surely leaving the miraculous to someone in their 20s would’ve been better!

He clearly favours LB over CN even though the Ladybug and Black Cat are supposed to be partners! Wouldn’t it make sense for them both to be in contact with the guardian from the start?? He randomly started introducing rules such as if LB and CN find out each other’s identities they would lose their miraculous… what kind of bullshit rule is that? It also came out of fucking nowhere!

Final Thoughts:

But to summarise all of that: Miraculous is on quite a steep decline but I’m invested at this point and I am genuinely curious as to where the fuck this will go.

Marinette needs professional fucking help before the writers even consider canonising Adrienette cause at the moment she is not what Adrien needs!

Adrien needs to stand up for himself! He needs to pull LB to the side and tell her what he feels and what he’s going through cause he is on the precipice of a breakdown!

(Small point that’s more to do with the fandom: when searching for fanfics it’s really annoying that Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir Bashing is a tag but Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Ladybug Bashing isn’t. Why does everyone think Marinette can do no wrong???)

[dabiboy]

Ok, so I tried to keep this one as canon as possible, so I hope it turned out good and you guys like it!

Tiny Thing [Dad!Dabi]

Your relationship was not even a relationship. The two of you were together, yet there were days in which Dabi went missing for weeks, and you had no idea if he was coming back alive. And didn't change when the happy not so happy little accident happened. He let you make the choice, keep it or... Just finish with all of it. After days and days of thinking, you have decided that you were going to keep the baby, and of course, you gave him the liberties, either if he wanted to stay or just go away, at the end of the day a kid was not a game, neither something simple or temporary. It was a surprise when he said that he was going to be there, not all the time, but he was going to try. It was not only his past that haunted him, but also the fact that he was a villain. How were you going to explain your hero friends? family? How could he tell the LoV that now he had a kid? The two of you just couldn't, and that creature was your best secret.

Everything was set for that Friday morning, your best friend was going to babysit Kaji as you were out for half of the day, but things are not always how you expect them to be.

''I'm coming!'' You said, letting the ten-month-old infant on his crib as you went to open the door. 

''Hey there'' Your jaw dropped when you saw the black-haired man standing in front of you.

''Dabi? What are you doing here'' Your voice was full of surprises, but you quickly pulled him in so no one could see him. 

''Told Chapstick he could fuck off today'' He smirked, sliding his hands on each side of your hips as he kissed your jaw.

''As much as I would like to do this, and ask you where have you been, I can't. I'm already late and-'' He interrupted you when it hit him.

''The thing. How is it?'' Dabi asked, moving away from you so he could see you.

''The thing has a name, Kaji. And it is your kid'' You raised an eyebrow.

''My thing'' He replied back, making you roll your eyes. 

''He's fine'' you punched his chest softly ''Ema is coming today to take care of him.''

''Who the fuck is Ema'' he asked furrowing his eyebrows ''Where are you going?'' Dabi asked again. 

''My best friend, and I got a call from the job. They need me there until two pm, so she will be here in a few minutes.''

''I can take care of him'' He stated simply raising his shoulders, and you opened your eyes in surprise. 

''You what'' 

''I can take care of him today, is my son after all.'' he said again ''I'm not gonna burn him alive as my father did with me, so don't worry princess''

You hit him on his shoulder again, making him laugh at his dark joke. And you thought for a second, was it a good idea? You trusted him, but not the people that were after him. What if the League finds out? What if some hero arrived at your door and saw him with a kid, without knowing he was indeed his father? Those questions were screaming inside your head, but you decided to give it a try. It was the first time in three months he was back, and... You wanted Kaji to spend time with him.

''Ok, fine. But call me if you notice things start getting messy, or if you suspect something, got it?'' You said with concern, the baby boy was your life. And certainly, your love for Dabi remained the same even though things were informal between the two of you.

''Messy as in he threw up on me, or messy as in there's a bunch of villains coming over?'' 

''You know which one'' you said and started moving quickly, grabbing your bag. ''Listen, gotta go now or else I'll lose my job. He's sleeping in his crib, the toys are all over the place, if he doesn't stop crying you'll have to pick him up, his favorite toy is the one that looks like you, he has to eat at one pm, then take a nap. But I should be back soon, I'll call you''

For more than you wanted to stay more time with the two of them, you couldn't. Your incomes were the only thing that allowed you to live in the apartment, and of course to give Kaji what he needed. You left a soft kiss on Dabi's lips before going back to the baby's room and press a kiss on his forehead. You were going to call Ema on your way to the job to tell her there was someone else taking care of the baby. 

Dabi just stood there, and look at the number of colorful toys scattered on the floor, why had he said that he was going to take care of the baby? He had no idea what to do, but a part of him wanted to spend time with Kaji, his son.

He walked slowly towards his bedroom, and saw at the crib with some kind of panic, confusion, and maybe a little sadness because he had lost enough of his life already. The boy sleeping in the crib was just like him, the same facial features, and he was thankful he had your hair color and not his, not another reminder of his past. It was still hard to believe that he had a son, that tiny innocent creature had no idea of the father he had, but he was trying, trying hard not to be so shitty. Dabi rested his forearms on the cribs, looking at him.

''Fuck you're cute, you little accident'' He said to himself, trying not to wake him up. ''So you're just gonna sleep there until you find something better to do, huh? Fine then''

Dabi started walking around the room, looking at the plushies, interactive toys, everything. Was his childhood like that? He had some good memories, but the bad ones were more. And looking at the little thing sleeping on the crib, he couldn't even imagine putting him through the same hell he went. He was a bastard, but not a psycho. Nor a selfish hero.

He had no idea how many minutes he spent looking at the toys in the room, until he heard a babbling. Dabi turned around, and there he was. Awake, showing off his turquoise eyes. The same eyes he had. There was no doubt he was his son. Once more his forearms were on the edge of the crib.

''Hope you remember me, you came out of my pants anyway'' He raised an eyebrow. The infant moved his tiny hands, and also his legs. But right after a few seconds, he pouted his lips and started crying as if there were no tomorrow ''Shit, don't cry. C'mon you thing'' Dabi almost pleaded, and he grabbed the first toy he saw, moving it in front of him ''Look at the toy, c'mon''

But the cries didn't stop, on the contrary, they just kept increasing. Was he hungry? did he miss you? maybe he wanted to go back to sleep, and Dabi had no idea what the hell to do until your voice echoed in his head ''Pick him up'' and then he cursed to himself. He was smart, so it didn't take him too much time to know how to lift him, however, he was scared he might hurt him.

''Is this what you wanted?'' He asked when the baby's cry was slowly fading. Kaji looked at Dabi, right in his eyes and it felt like looking at a mirror. He was thinking about everything he has done, all the crimes he had committed until now, how could he be holding a bundle of innocense in his arms? It was as if Kaji heard his thoughts, because he started crying again, louder than before. Dabi hissed and started walking around the apartment, trying to calm him down. ''I know I have an ugly ass face, but you'll get used to it, your mom did so you can too''

Dabi looked around the toys in the living room, looking for the one you said looked like him. Was it a blue one? Or maybe one that was ripped or something. But right in the corner was a pirate teddy bear, his ears and nose full of rings, more like piercings. He scoffed and picked it up, it doesn't look like me, he thought. He moved the plushie, trying to call Kaji's attention with it.

He sat on the floor, letting the kid there too, trying to ease his crying while moving his favorite toy in front of him. But it wasn't working either. And Dabi was frustrated.

''For fuck sake.'' He cursed, using his hand to cover his face, a few gleams of tiny blue flames leaving his hand. And the crying stopped. ''Did you like that?'' Dabi asked, moving a little bit away from him so he could do it again, and when he did, Kanji laughed with puffy eyes. ''You little bastard'' Dabi smirked, repeating his actions and the boy clapped in happiness.

It looked as if the blue fire caught his attention, since it was the only thing Kaji was looking at, not even his toys. Dabi kept using his fingers to light up little but multiple blue sparkles. ''Ok, I need to stop this or else I'll burn the entire apartment down, and we don't want that, do we?'' In a gesture that surprised himself, Dabi left a soft pat on Kaji's head.

The two blue-eyed boys stood there, sitting on the floor. Dabi didn't even notice his own expression, a tiny smile on his face as he saw every little action the kid did, how he crawled around the living room, or how he chewed some toys. But at some points, the toys were boring again, because he started to climbs Dabi's thigh, a way of asking for his attention. Dabi picked him up again, holding him right in front of his face.

''What is it no-'' Dabi hissed. And he hissed in pain because the baby grabbed his chin, pulling at the skin, and by doing so also the staples ''You little fucke-'' He interrupted himself again, as he tried to pull his hand away, and when he did the kid giggled ''There are better things than my dirty staples'' He lifted him on the air, making Kaji laugh again. ''Yeah, you're cute''

Dabi was smiling again, repeating the action of lifting his arms with Kaji on his hands. It was a weird feeling, was it unfair? The baby had no idea what his father did, the things he had done. His smile was slowly fading, the little boy's eyes were pure, shiny and innocent, how could he clap at that man's face? Dabi was feeling guilty, he wasn't worthy of that cute little thing.

''Listen,'' He sat him on his lap, flexing his knees so Kaji could lay his back there. ''I'm a shitty father, but... Damn, I am a shitty father,'' He scoffed at the affirmation ''I'm trying, okay? I know I'm fucked up but I'll try not to be shit with you'' He pocked at his chubby cheek with his index finger.

Hours went by, playing and talking at him as if Kaji could understand every word, even the bad ones. The clock on the wall stroke 1pm, and being functional he stood up holding the boy in his arms, walking to the kitchen. Opening the fridge, he found a tiny dinosaur bowl, the content? A disgusting green color, probably many vegetables crushed in order to make that kind of... Soup. Dabi looked at it with a disgusted expression, but he had no idea how to cook for a kid so Kaji would have to it anyway.

The black-haired man took the bowl and the kid back to the living room, sitting him on his tiny chair. He heated the food with his hand, and took the spoon to try to make him eat. Kaji seemed to enjoy it, until he slapped a full spoon against him, staining Dabi's cheek. He cursed and his face had a deadpan expression As if my face wasn't fucked up enough already he cursed under his breath and took a napkin so he could clean up himself. The rest of the lunch went smooth, and once the bowl was empty he left in on the table.

Dabi remembered your words, Kaji had to take a nap after his lunch. Big failure. Twenty minutes, thirty five, an hour, and the baby was still awake. To his eyes, his father was funnier than a nap. But then he thought you should have been home by now, but that changed when you called him. A trip to another city, you said. And a part of him was happy, and the other was worried. Was he going to be able to take care of him the rest of the day? Maybe. He took a deep breath and kept with his task for the day.

They went back to the floor, the kid sitting between his legs as he kept playing distractedly with his toys. There were moments when Dabi lift him up, and made him set his little feet over his, and trying to make him walk, but Kaji was having the time of his life rather than learning how to walk. Dabi took some pictures of him, even he got a selfie. And there was no way he was going to let Toga near his phone again, they couldn't found out about Kaji. No way.

When night arrived and after his dinner, Dabi tried to make him sleep on his crib, but then a thought haunted him. What if something happened? What if someone entered through the window and take Kaji away while he was sleeping? He couldn't do that. So he picked him up again and went back to your room. Dabi opened the bed and set the kid in the middle of it. He got rid of his boots so he could lay by his side, and resting his weight on the side of his body he laid a hand on Kaji's tiny belly, preventing him from falling.

''I meant what I said earlier, tiny thing'' He whispered ''I'll try not to be a shitty dad. Just give me some time and I’ll figure this shit out’’ '' He closed his eyes.

Taking care of a baby was tiering, and eventually, Dabi could feel his eyelids heavier and heavier. He didn't even notice when he fell asleep next to him, not moving an inch away from Kaji. He didn't want that.

You arrived home at two am, and you were quite scared because Dabi was not answering your calls, and when you got home all the lights were off. The door of your room was open, and you slowly walked in. And the sight made your heart clench. Dabi was asleep, and Kaji was peacefully sleeping by his side, his tiny hands over Dabi's hand, somehow holding his fingers. When you took a step in, Dabi woke up and move away from Kaji a bit.

''I was... I was making sure this thing was breathing'' He said, raspy voice and tired eyes. You laughed softly at his embarrassment  ''How was the trip?'' he asked in a whisper. 

''It was fine, longer than I expected tho'' You laid on the other side of the bed, kissing Kaji's forehead and caressing his head. ''Was it hard?'' You asked him.

''I think this creature loves me more than you do'' Dabi teased and tried to sit on the bed, but the baby whined a bit. 

''I think you're right. He doesn't want you to leave'' You looked at him ''And honestly, I don't want you to leave either, Dabi'' He scoffed.

''I guess I can make an exception for the two of you today'' He laid on his side again, and Kaji curled up next to his side. ''And you owe me my payment, dollface'' Dabi said, laying a hand on Kaji's back. Your heart melted again.

''And what is it?'' You asked in amusement.

''Your shitty kisses, because I haven't got one since I fucking got here'' He smirked, closing his eyes one more time.

You didn't know in what stage your relationship was but at that moment? It didn't care. You were there, with the two men you loved the most by your side, and even if it was one night in a hundred, it was a night you were going to keep in your heart and soul forever.

............................................

Tag list [open]: @angelofdarkness1020 @totallytouya @pemichh @hecatve

[jeonsjiddies]

Show Me | pjm (m)

Summary - Jimin shows you how good he can make you feel.

Word Count - 2146

Pairing -  Jimin x reader

Genre - smut

Warnings - penetrative sex, exhibitionism, voyerism, dirty talk, dom jimin

a/n -  another re-write from a previous fandom. :)

“This project will be worth 30% of your grade.“ 

A normal Wednesday morning in  your government class just got a little more interesting.

“I assigned you partners,“ the professor continued as a collective groan echoed through the classroom. 

“Jeon Jungkook  and Kim Taehyung.” 

Jungkook and Tae high fived.

“Kim Seokjin and Min Yoongi.”  

“Jung Hoseok and Kim Namjoon.” 

Hoseok whooped quietly, grinning at Namjoon

“Y/N and Park Jimin.” She said and you froze, glancing over at the notorious bad boy who raised an eyebrow at you, as one corner of his mouth tilted up.

You couldn’t focus on the rest of the names that she read off because you were too busy panicking. How did you end up paired with Jimin? Was the teacher trying to kill you? You had nothing against the blonde haired risk-taker, quite the opposite. You had a huge crush on Jimin. From his long soft, pushed back locks, to his shimmering brown eyes, to his freakishly large thighs and strong frame. He was terrifyingly attractive, sex on legs, and you were nervous as hell to work with him.

“Please get together with your partners and discuss your strategies for this assignment.”  

Jimin smiled that devilish smile, beckoning you over with one finger. You gathered your books and stood, walking on wobbly legs towards the sinfully gorgeous boy.

“Hey.”  

“Hey,” you tried to sound normal.

“Don’t be scared, princess. I don’t bite - hard,” he grinned, sensing your uneasiness.

He leaned far into your personal space as he said it and you noticed the tangy scent of his cologne as you sucked in a breath. He even smelled like heaven.

“I’m- I’m not,” you said  quietly.

“You seem pretty nervous to me. Listen, just because I’ve got a reputation doesn’t mean I’m some lawless thug who-“ 

“No! I don’t think that!” you interjected, “I don’t have anything against you or your reputation.” 

“Then why are you acting like you could jump up and flee out the nearest exit if I move too fast?” he accused. 

“Social anxiety.”  

“Oh,” he said, The guilt apparent on his features.

“Yeah. So which amendment did you want to start with?” you asked,  getting focused and trying not to sniff him; he smelled so good.

 20 minutes later, you’d both picked out which amendments you’d be showcasing as having a lasting impact on the country, and which ones seemed out of date. The bell rang and you stood up to leave when Jimin placed a hand on your arm, his fingers on your bare skin burned in a delightful way.

“I’m sorry about earlier, I… I'm just so tired of being looked down on for where I come from,” he explained. 

“I could never look down on you, Jimin. You’re too tall,” you joked, earning a rare Jimin genuine smile, “ should we exchange numbers so we can work on the project?“  

“Oh don’t worry y/n, I’ll find you,” He grinned deviously. 

You flushed, watching him saunter down the hallway.

You organized records in alphabetical order a few nights later at your afterschool job. You didn’t hear the doorbell chime, so you nearly peed your pants when a soft, sultry voice whispered in your ear.

“Told you I’d find you.”

You whirled around, coming face to face with Jimin. He was dangerously close to you, if you just used your tiptoes, you could kiss him. Your heart beat like a hummingbirds in your chest.

“Hi,” you breathed out in a whisper.

“Hi,” he whispered back, gaze flicking from your eyes to your lips.

His tongue danced across his own lips, and he started to lean in. The doorbell chimed, breaking the spell you’d both been under and he stepped back quickly.

“So um, maybe tomorrow after school, you could come over and work on the government project?” he asked, running a hand through his hair. 

“Yeah, sounds good. Can I ride with you though? I’m saving up for a car,”  you looked down. 

“Sure, meet me by the front door after your last lecturel.”

You watched him walk out the door, letting out the breath you hadn’t known you’d been holding.

You anxiously bounced your leg up and down during the last class of the day. You have been on edge all day. You were going to Jimin’s place. Would his roommates be home? Did he have roommates? Would you two be alone? So many of your naughty dreams had taken place in this seemingly imaginary place and this place was about to be real. You knew nothing sexual was actually going to happen, but you were still so nervous. The bell rang and you jumped out of your skin. It was time. You gathered your things, and walked to the front door, where Jimin was waiting for you. Hoseok and Jin  were by his side, all of them laughing.

“Hey y/n,” Jimin smiled. 

“Hey Y/N,” Jin and Hoseok said at the same time, both of them shouting “jinx!”

You giggled and waved hello.  Jimin threw an arm around your shoulders and walked with you to his bike. All eyes were on you, questions swimming through the halls of your university. People whispered to their friends and stared and ashamed.

“Everyone’s looking at us,” you whispered . 

“Good,” he winked and helped you onto the bike. 

You pressed your body close to his, arms wrapped tightly around his waist. He sped out of the parking lot, leaving the spectators in the dust. You buried your head into his back, trying not to watch the lines on the road flash by. When he pulled up to the apartment complex, you didn’t let go for a moment.

“You ok?”  

“Yeah, just give me a second. I’m a little woozy.” 

He got off the bike and looked at you for a moment, then picked you up and carried you inside.

“Put me down!” you shriek-laughed. 

“Didn’t want you to stumble since you were ‘woozy’,” he shrugged, plopping you into the couch. 

You hated to admit it, but being held in his lean, strong arms make you feel alive, like adrenaline have been shot straight into your heart. You already missed the warm, safe feeling. You sighed. 

“So… hungry? Thirsty?”  

“I’m okay, thanks,” you smiled and he sat next to you on the couch, far too close but not nearly close enough. 

 As you typed out which amendments were outdated, you were hyper aware of Jimins’ every movement. It was driving you crazy, being so close to him. You both chatted about random topics, as you worked. About halfway through, you stood up to stretch and take a break, as did Jimin. You took a step towards the kitchen for some water, tripping over your backpack, but Jimin’s strong arms darted out to catch you. Your hands on his chest, his arms around you, that’s where it really began. You were being electrocuted by his touch. You both stayed like that, lost in each other’s eyes. 

Jimin moved in slow motion, lips barely grazing yours in feather soft brushes. Gentle, sweet. You were floating on air. Then, the wild fire broke out, Jimin’s lips crashing down on yours with so much need and desire, you could barely keep up. He shoved you against a wall, hands roaming everywhere on your body, lighting you ablaze. You moaned into his mouth, able to stop it. His hands on your body sent you into another level of lust, another level of craving him. He bit down harshly on your neck creating a gasp from you. He blew cold air on it, licking the sore red spot. The stinging turned to tingling, sending shivers down your spine.

“Everyone’s going to see these tomorrow know that you’re mine,” he pulled your hips closer roughly.

“I’ve been watching you, princess. I’ve seen you in those pretty little skirts, completely unaware of all the boys watching you. Unaware of what you’re doing. Teasing. I’ve wanted this from the day I laid eyes on you. So many nights alone I would think of your pretty plump lips wrapped around my cock,” he groaned. 

His words had you soaking.

“Why did you wait?”    

“Didn’t think you’d want someone like me,” he shrugged. 

“Do you know how many nights I’ve touched myself to the thought of you, Jimin? How many times I’ve moaned your name, wishing your hands were the ones touching me? You’re so sexy, so brave. I’ve wanted you inside me for so long,” you whispered hotly 

“You got off thinking about me?”  

You bit your lip, nodding. 

“Show me,” he grinned mischievously. 

You bravely took his hand and had him guide you to his room. You crawled onto his bed as he stood, watching you. Your eyes locked on his, you began undressing. Slowly, you removed everything you were wearing, your hands going to your breasts. You kneaded them, rolling your nipple between your forefinger and thumb. 

“Mmm...” you closed your eyes, lolling your head back, “Fuck, Jimin.” 

Your hands slowly traveled down your body, until they landed by your aching heat. Your fingers danced along your slit, then you pushed one inside yourself, arching your back and groaning as you circled it around your clit. Jimin’s breath hitched as he watched you pleasure yourself for him. You added another finger, pumping it in and out slowly, squirming on Jimin’s bed. You’d done this a thousand times, but with Jimin’s face watching your every move, it was so much more thrilling, it was erotic. You began moving your fingers faster, his name falling from your lips as you got closer, your orgasm crashing over you. 

“Mmm… oh gosh, Jimin,” you moaned loudly, eyes connected with his, and you could hear his heavy breathing. 

You lay there, naked body on full display for Jimin. His eyes had darkened, his deep brown now resembling black. 

“Shit princess, that was so fucking sexy,“ he groaned, stepping towards the bed, “but I can make you feel even better.” 

“Show me,” you purred. 

Jimin sprang into action, flinging his shirt off and unbuckling his jeans faster than you’d ever seen anyone move. Down to his boxers, he crawled on top of you, kissing you rough and deep and so good. You couldn’t believe this was actually happening. His boxer-covered erection ground against your dripping core and you groaned. 

“You like that baby? Like how my big fat cock feels against that tight little pussy?” He moaned in your ear. 

“Yes, fuck,” you whimpered, “Jimin, I need you.” 

Jimin grabbed a condom from inside his night stand and slipped it on quickly, aligning himself with your entrance. He slowly pushed in, and oh gosh it stung. He was so big. He lay still for a moment, watching your face for a sign you were ready to move. When you nodded, he slowly pulled out of you, then gently thrust back in. The stinging turned to this amazing, warm, delicious feeling and Jimin started moving faster, whispering dirty things in your ear, telling you how good you felt around him. 

“So beautiful, you take it so good baby,” he encouraged you, but you couldn’t answer. You were a moaning mess underneath him.

Jimin hit every good spot, and knew exactly what he was doing as he pounded into you, and you’d never felt such bliss in your life. The fire deep inside of you was one that you weren’t sure could be quenched. He filled you up so completely, bringing you absolute ecstasy. Jimin was made to fuck, and he was amazing at it. You writhed underneath him, unable to keep still from the insane amounts of pleasure coursing through you. You knew you were close, and so did Jimin, his hand reaching down to draw figure 8’s on your clit.  When your orgasm came, it was like the entire world was shaking. You screamed out his name, back aching into his body, feeling like your soul was leaving yours. You were flying. You felt high. Jimin filled the condom seconds later, panting as his body collapsed on top of yours. He rolled next to you and gathered you in his arms. 

“Holy shit,” he breathed, chest rising and falling rapidly. 

“Agreed,” you nodded, snuggling into his embrace. 

He smirked, and kissed your cheek. You blushed and hid your face in his neck, making him laugh. 

“How can you be shy after all that?” 

“Shut up,” you mumbled into his skin. 

“Y/N?” He asked quietly.

“Hmmm?” 

“I want you, all the time. I don’t want to have to let you go after this, will you be mine?” he asked, and when you were quiet ( simply because you were in shock) he added “I promise I’ll treat you right, like you deserve.”

You lifted your head to meet his gaze, smiling at him as you nodded, telling him you would be his. 

“Show me.” 

[lochnessies]

ok here’s a dissection of a post an anon sent me the link to and bc i have the worst time management possible and i completely forgot i had it lol so sorry anon here you go ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

I am constantly thinking about how Edelgard just doesn’t seem designed to appeal to cishet men.

i hate to be the one to break this news to you op but just because a character doesn’t show skin like charlotte fire emblem doesn’t mean she isn’t designed to pander to men. she’s very much designed to pander to the (majority straight male) player base with her ‘uwu i only trust you professor omg did u see that rat? pls don’t look at my painting of you uwu’.

then there’s the whole edelgard c support in japanese where byleth makes reference to having come to her room for ‘yobi’ which is

there’s also the scene where byleth can make an unsolicited comment about edelgard’s breast size. which is… uhh… gross.

edelgard also has cipher cards that go from slightly fanserviceie to full on suggestive

and also her breast armor that my sister relentlessly mocked lol

and here’s a chart from the 3h subreddit about gender/sexually in regards to edelgard and edeleth. it’s extremely straight male. op might have just overlooked this since they probably don’t go on reddit and stay on tumblr (which unlike reddit is mostly female and has a high lgbt demographic).

Like the joke is that Bleagles is the Gay House, but everything about her feels deliberately non-hetero.

i don’t like where this is going…

She’s dressed in sharp outfits covering her upper body, with proportions that don’t seem exaggerated.

so women who cover up must be lgbt because straight women are naturally more revealing? oh y i k e s

Her poise and the way she effortlessly flourishes her axe exhibits an air of coolness. While titties out =/= character of no substance, Edelgard being dressed more modestly suggests that she wasn’t designed with male-centred fanservice in mind.

“titties don’t equal no substance but here’s my post on how she has more substance because she doesn’t show titties” ok

And she still looks absolutely stunning in her more modest attire (like seriously, I haven’t felt the need to return to cosplay in years but I want to do her academy look so bad). 

yes she does. amazing design 10/10. i have a feeling this is the only part i’m going to agree with

Edelgard is intense. She does not mince her words and she is constantly evaluating you. Though she tries, she has a difficult time understanding her peers initially. Early on, she talks about how she would sacrifice herself and others in the name of some greater good. She is terrible at communicating with her peers. She has to be seen as infallible. Her heart has been hardened for years and she assumes she has to stay that way. She also assumes everyone mourns the same way she does - which is why she (kind of insensitively) insists you move on when Jeralt dies. Because to her, grief has to be channeled towards action, or else you’ll get lost in it. This attitude is demonstrated time and time again as she presses on. It can make her come off as cold and unfeeling - but look closer, and she’s anything but.

don’t really have anything to say at this part. it is pretty on the nose though i would slightly disagree with that last sentence a bit. i wouldn’t say she’s as i feeling as hubert is but all of her talks of the war boil down to how she feels and never her victims.

Her story is ultimately about her realizing that to achieve her goals, she needs to let people in and allow herself to want things like cakes and tea parties and lazy days in peace. 

????? what ????? her goals include imperialism, ethnic and religious targeting. her story is about having a set of beliefs and mowing down anybody who stands in her way. that has nothing to do with tea, friends, and lazy days. also am i supposed to be sad that she has to get up everyday and work? i do that and i didn’t start a war and only throw a pity party for myself

The game leaves the player guessing as to how involved the Flame Emperor was in each Part I event, makes you feel hurt by her betrayal, and leaves you with a choice: do you follow the orders of the woman who tried to make you a god without your consent, or a young girl with questionable morals about to throw the world into upheaval?

this isn’t an ideal situation but i think i’m going to stick with the woman who tried to make me a god since i’m not selfish and i know it’s not only my desires and life at stake here. plus the green hair slaps ngl

Choosing her of your own volition (not for completionist reasons) requires the basic ability to sympathize with a woman’s pain. It also requires the player to read beyond her unwavering will and dubious methods to get a sense of how deep that pain goes and how the theme of humanity relates to her differently in each route.

i’m not going to touch this since @nilsh13 made a post on it that i’ll link here. i agree with everything he said so to repeat it would be redundant.

The player must be able to see a young woman’s desperate resolve to change the world so it stops exploiting people and ruining lives. They must be able to accept the fact that women can make the same morally wrong and ambivalent decisions that complicated male characters get to make all the time and still be the one to root for.

literally the same reason i love rhea lol her goddess experiments are dubious at best but her reasons are the same you mentioned. i would say that i like this quality in edelgard too if her ending, while bloody, actually ended in a good outcome for fodlan.

This is not unique to LGBT+ people, but this population is likely to understand why Edelgard feels so strongly about why she has to change the system. 

i understand wanting to change a system, i really do. like edelgard, i’m an opinionated bisexual woman (who’s also physically disabled) so yeah i get it. and change can be good but it can also be terrible. even if the church was the boogeyman edelgard treats it as she still replaces it with her own shit regime. so it’s the same circus just with a new conductor.

I don’t think “Edelgard gets undue criticism because she’s a woman” captures the full picture. An important aspect of her treatment by certain parts of the fandom is that she’s a radical woman.

or maybe she does some pretty fucked up shit and it goes unacknowledged in her own route. and yeah she’s radical but in all the worst ways.

Her hatred of the Church and the Crest system resonates way harder with people who have been hurt by institutions that are deeply engrained in our society. 

and what about people who have been hurt by systems where their ‘merit’ didn’t measure up and they were left behind? what about people from nations that experienced imperialism?

Siding with her means siding against the Church - which, while different from real world religious institutions, still invokes language about “sin” and “punishment.

yeah the ‘sins’ and ‘punishments’ are used in relation to attempted murders which i think everybody can agree is a bad thing that needs to be condemned.

Choosing Edelgard will likely hit different if homophobic and transphobic Christians used that rhetoric against you.

it has literally nothing to do with ‘sins’ and ‘punishments’ in regards to being gay or trans. that’s you projecting. especially since the church has 2 canon gay characters and two coded ones.

like i can understand why having a church condemn you can be uncomfortable but i’m begging you to please look at the context of what’s happening.

I’m willing to go out on a limb and say that the reason F/F Edeleth is the more popular iteration of that ship because most people who would choose to S-support Edelgard are LGBT+ themselves. This is not a revelation. To anyone in the community, it’s fairly obvious. 

i was talking to nilish and he said

so yeah… while there is definitely sapphic femleth shippers out there, there’s still a whole lot of weird fetishizing going on from straight men about edelgard.

Crimson Flower was my first route. I went into the game knowing absolutely nothing. I played it during the last week of 2020 and hoo boy was it cathartic. 

i can tell. this wasn’t supposed to be a dig but it came out that way and i’m not taking it out.

I felt like I was living out a gay revolution power fantasy, where I could truly change systems of oppression while fighting alongside a group of troubled students I’d shaped the lives of.

so a gay revolution power fantasy (cringe) goes hand in hand with imperialism and installing a dictatorship? also the war had nothing to do with sexuality.

Through your unwavering support, Edelgard learns that she needs to be human, that she must listen to her friends, and that she’s allowed to enjoy the world she’s creating.

edelgard gets to learn how to be human all while hunting those who don’t. and she doesn’t listen fo her friends. she doesn’t even trust them. she’s willing to talk to byleth but keep the people who’s been by her side for five years in the dark about everything. and yeah she gets to enjoy her new words since she’s on top. hate to be a commoner under her rule after she burned down my village in her war.

I love this character so much.

clearly. and i honestly don’t care if somebody likes her. i do as well even if my sometimes scathing words can make it seem otherwise.

It has been six months since I first played and I am still analyzing her,

me too. please help me escape i’m losing my mind

because there’s so much depth. Yet so many people fail to see that depth and dismiss her as evil,

i mean, she does some fucked up shit that goes beyond any of the less than desirable actions of the other main characters and does an extremely poor job in trying to make herself seem innocent. i personally don’t think she’s pure evil but i completely understand where the people who say she is are coming from.

because they never had the will to understand complicated women in the first place. 

that’s big talk from somebody who implies that a gay pope is comparable to homophobic and transphobic irl religions and that leads an oppressive regime all because she uses the vague terms of sin and punishments that you have to gay power fantasy your way out of

[ithebookhoarder]

Can I get 83 off the angst list with Javier??? It's: Stay there I'm coming to get you

100 ways to say ily Prompt 83: “Stay there. I’m coming to get you” (Javier Peña x F!Reader)

A/N: Ooo, right in the angst. Let’s get to it! I also assume you meant this prompt list rather than the angst one as that’s only up to 20 ;) Don’t worry. I got you tho! I hope you like it x  Apologies for my terrible attempts at Spanish, so let me know if I got any of it wrong.

Warnings: Swearing, violence, blood, references to death (let me know if I missed anything)

Masterlist:

-------

“Javi?”

“Y/N?” 

The sound of his voice was soft as you held the phone to your ear. You could hear the soft echo of music playing in the background telling you he was definitely at home. 

Why wouldn’t he be, given the hour? It was the morning. 3 am to be precise. He should have been asleep. You should have been asleep, but no, you’d had to chase this lead alone. Like an idiot. A strong willed idiot who should have known better. 

But no. The idea of being able to catch one of Escobar’s top employees had been too tempting an opportunity to miss despite the fact the ambassador had said otherwise. In fact, he’d said fuck no, telling all of you to wait it out and get another source to confirm it. 

Apparently a friend of one of Javi’s ex informants wasn’t what they called reliable... even though she had direct access to the people supposed to be gathering tonight at the club you’d been staking out. 

Two hours you’d watched from your car, having snuck out to do so. If Javier and Steve had wanted to behave for once, then that was their call. They could stay and fill out paperwork to their hearts content. 

You didn’t need them for what was supposed to be a routine stake out and observation mission. 

Or so you’d thought. 

The fact you’d been made by one of the gang about thirty minutes after you’d entered the club had put a pretty big dampener on your plan. You hadn’t noticed as they’d arrived, recognising you after you’d almost caught them at a raid only days ago. 

The sicario had slipped away, managing to leap across one of the roofs as you’d chased them across. Had Steve not grabbed your arm and told you it was too dangerous a jump to risk, you’d have followed. 

But here he was, back and ready for payback... and he’d been quick to point you out to the others surrounding him. 

You knew it had been risky to be here and unfortunately, you were proved horrifically right. The fact you’d got away was a minor miracle, even if you were now bleeding. Badly. 

Damn bullet had missed but the graze was agonising, causing you to wince as you clutched at your side, trying to stem the bleeding as best you could. 

“Javi... I messed up.”

“Y/N, hermosa. What is it? What’s wrong? Where are you?”

His questions were relentless, firing one after the other as he detected the fear in your voice. The pain and regret too. 

“I’m ... I’m in an alley... by Fiebre... I’m sorry...”

“No, no. Don’t be sorry. It’s ok,” Javi soothed, panic underlying each word. You could hear him clattering about, most likely grabbing his keys and rushing out of the apartment next to yours. He didn’t need to ask to know what you were doing or why you were there. He knew you too well. He also knew you wouldn’t be calling like this if you weren’t in trouble. Trouble serious enough he had to get to you. Fast. “I’m on my way. Just stay there. I’m coming to get you.” 

A tear rolled down your cheek as the air suddenly felt a lot colder. Like Javi had just turned on the stupid faulty AC unit in your apartment, like he always did when it got late and he was staying over to look over material or keeping you company. 

God. What you’d have given to have him there to hold you right then. To wrap his familiar leather jacket around you like he always did when you forgot a jacket of your own, still forgetting that the hot days often fell into cooler nights. 

You longed for its touch, its scent, its comfort as you stared at the sky and prayed you lived long enough to regret this. 

“Fuck.” Your car was just down the street. You were so close but you didn’t know if you had the strength to make it there. “Javi... I’m bleeding... the bullet... it hit my side... it won’t stop.”

“Y/N, baby. Listen to me. We’re coming. Steve and I. It’s gonna be ok. Just keep talking to me, ok? Put pressure on it and don’t fall asleep. You hear me?”

“Javi-“

“I’m fucking serious, hermosa. You hear me? You better keep your damn eyes open long enough so I can look at them when we get there, and you make some stupid wise crack about all this.”

A car door slammed. Voices rang out over the line. You could hear an engine start. 

“Javi... I love you... I really do...”

“Y/N? Y/N?”

His voice sounded desperate, terrified even, as you faded away, failing to reply. You simply felt the edges of your vision beginning to dim and the inevitable pull of sleep tugging you toward an abyss you knew there would be no coming back from. 

You couldn’t fight it any longer.

A single tear trickled down your cheek and you felt the phone drop from your hand onto the cold concrete beneath you. 

“I’m sorry.”

——— 

“-y tienes suerte de que te quiera mucho. Odio los hospitales. este lugar es jodidamente horrible. No puedo dejarte aquí solo. no cuando te vas a despertar en cualquier momento. ¿Me escuchas? Tú vas a-“

The voices were coming in waves, washing over you and disappearing just as quickly. 

It was hard to try and hold on to, even if you wanted to. This voice in particular was soft and tempting, familiar even... Coaxing you in over and over every time you slipped back into the darkness that was so warm and soft. 

You’d always been a deep sleeper, slamming your alarm harder than necessary whenever it tried to wake you. 

Now was the same... even if you knew it shouldn’t be. Even if you felt odd, like you were supposed to be somewhere and you’d forgotten... 

But where?

“She should have woken by now-“

“Javi, calm down. She’s gonna be fine. The doctor said so. She just needs to rest. Have a little faith in her. She’s tough. She’ll pull through this.”

“But if she doesn’t ... Steve, I can’t...”

“Hey. Look at me, Peña. It’s gonna be alright. Now come on. Connie said she’d bring some clothes for you...”

There they were. The voices again. 

Somehow, you knew that they were trying to pull you back to wherever you were supposed to be. 

To the aching you felt. To the mechanical beeping you could hear. To the painfully bright lights hovering overhead. 

To the weight and warmth of someone’s hand holding yours. 

To the familiar face pressed against the bed as he slept, holding you hand tightly as if scared to let you go. 

“Javi?” you croaked. 

Like that, he was awake. 

You worried he’d have whiplash, he sat up so fast, eyes wide in disbelief as he realised you were awake. “Y/N? Oh, thank God!” 

“Y/N?”

“Steve?” you rasped, noticing your other partner as he leapt out of his chair in the corner of the room. The relief was clear as he smiled and hurried to the door. 

“Thank god. I’m gonna grab a nurse.” 

“Ok.” You smiled and turned to Javier who was still holding your hand tight, watching you with bloodshot eyes. “What... how long was I-?”

“Three days,” he whispered. “You really scared me there for a second, hermosa. You... you lost so much blood and they weren’t sure you were gonna make it.” 

“I’m sorry.”

The sight of tears in his eyes was more painful than the bullet hole that was currently sending white hot agony shooting through your side. You’d never seen Javi so torn up before. Never. The worst was when he’d sit silently and smoke for hours without even moving. 

As much as you hated that, you’d take that any day over this. Knowing you were the cause. 

“No. Don’t be,” he dismissed swiftly. “I mean yeah, I wanna shoot you myself for running off and pulling a dumb fucking stunt like that but I get it... I really do. I’d have done the same thing. Hell, I have done the same thing. I just wish you’d asked me to come. Or even Murphy. We would have.”

“The ambassador had his eye on you after the raid this week,” you protested weakly, wincing at the pain in your side as you tried to sit up. “I couldn’t risk you or Murphy or your jobs like that.” 

“Fuck our jobs.”

“Javi -“

“No, hermosa. Listen. I mean this. You come first, understood? Always,” Javi snarled, kissing the back of your hand. “I love you and I mean that. Life isn’t worth it without you. This job means shit all without you. You come first? Ok. Always. Seeing you lying there with all the blood on you... it made me realise a few things and this is one of them. I don’t want a life or a future without you in it.” 

You couldn’t help it as the tears began to flow again, your heart swelling with love for the man in front of you. You couldn’t help but reach out and brush your fingers through his hair as you’d done so many nights before. 

“I love you too, Javier Peña.”

“Good. Remember that when Steve gets back and starts ripping into your ass,” Javier teased, lightening up now that your were awake and talking again. “I won’t be able to save you then, carino. Sorry. Sicarios are one thing, but Murphy? He’s almost as terrifying as Connie.”

Oh fuck. You’d forgotten about Connie. Oh she was gonna kill you. Big time. 

That woman was the biggest mother hen you’d met in your entire life. She’d also probably have your ass on house arrest for the rest of your life after this stunt. 

“Shit,” you whined, dropping back against the pillows. “It was good while it lasted.”

“And good thing we get to do it all again another time,” he hummed. “Just ... not for a while, ok? Not until you’re on your feet.” 

“You mean, not until Connie says so?”

Javi didn’t even flinch as he nodded, deadly serious. “Yep. 100 percent.”

------

Translation: “and you are lucky i love you so much. i hate hospitals. this place is fucking horrid. i cant leave you here alone. not when you are going to wake up any minute now. you hear me? you are going to-”

[fighterkimburgess]

Salty Ask List for One Chicago

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 26, 27

13. Hailey

Ok so I had written most of this and then tumblr lost it, and I’ve answered a few in the mean time so I’m not answering 10, 11, and 16. But let’s go!

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?*

D*wsey. From like episode 3 of fire I didn’t like them, it just never sat right with me.

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?*

I kinda think Upstead would have been better as one? But again, opinion only so ymmv.

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

Yup. People saying Hank Voight is more abusive than Hailey’s sperm donor, I have and will unfollow for that. Is the man perfect? Fuck no he’s not even good. But he’s not abusive and it’s an insult to survivors to call him that.

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?*

From what I know Brettonio used to be popular, and they’re my NoTP. They’re probably my only one Chicago one though!

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?*

I’m not saying ruined, and idk if it’s fandom or over exposure, but I’m over Upstead. I don’t hate them, I’m just meh. I used to love them and it makes me sad that I didn’t have that excitement for the wedding that I did for the I love yous, but it is what it is. I’m glad for people who do love them though!

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?*

I was gonna say no for this originally, but actually fandoms made me kinda like upzek! Not as an OTP, but as a glad it’s happened for the growth kinda thing.

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?*

Not really!

Gonna out the rest of this under a cut.

8. Have you received anon hate? What about?*

Yuuuuuppppp. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

First time was for writing burgstead. I wrote A Bad Decision to kinda test the waters because I’d had the idea for Unintentional, but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to write a full length. It nearly scared me off writing it but I’m glad it didn’t.

Unintentional gets a lot of negativity on FFN, people saying I’m jealous of Burzek. Folks. C’mon. Also for some reason Kitty Love gets hate??? No clue why. But I’m a “delusional Brettsey” so who knows 🙄🙄

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

Archer for sure. Also Hope, she just pissed me off so many times.

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

I wouldn’t say like, but I’m not too mad about romantic upzek now. I appreciate what we got as a result.

13. Unpopular opinion about Hailey?

She’s not an innocent flower Voight corrupted. From her first few episodes she was willing to lie to make sure Erin kept her job. That’s not because Voight made her, it’s because she wanted to.

14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom?

Burzek and Upstead aren’t in competition with each other, there can be two successful relationships at a time on a show, especially a procedural.

15. Unpopular opinion about the manga/show?

Idk if I have one??

17. Instead of XYZ happening, I would have made ABC happen

I wouldn’t have had Julie die after meeting Sylvie. It didn’t need to happen, and it was the second badly ending pregnancy that year.

18. Does not shipping something ‘popular’ mean you’re in denial and/or biased?

Not in the slightest! Again, ship what you ship. Multi shipping is a thing for a reason. Just don’t be a dick to people who don’t ship what you ship, or who ship the popular ship you don’t like.

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

That people would stop shitting on Adam. Yeah he was an idiot in the early seasons. But he’s really grown up in the last few, he’s learned, and he’s trying to put his lessons into practice and do the right thing. The end of 9x06 just proved how he’s trying to do it even when he’s afraid he’s wrong and ugh. Just give him a chance folks.

20. What is the purest ship in the fandom?

Plouch. If you try tell me it’s anyone else I will call you a dirty liar and it’ll be true. Because they are the purest, sweetest ship. That moment after Infection when he picks her up from work?? The bombing? His heart attack? I love them so much.

21. What are your thoughts on crack ships?

HOOK IT TO MY VEINS. C’mon. It’s me. Seriously though, a crack ship written seriously is my damn kryptonite. It’s a reason I’ve got a Matt/Kim idea floating around my head. As well as a Jay/Sarah Reese potential oneshot I’m still thinking about. But maybe.

22. Popular character you hate?

I don’t really hate any characters! Except Archer in Med, but we all hate him.

23. Unpopular character you love?

Voight I guess?

26. Most shippable character?

Either Kim or Sylvie. I could ship them both with basically everyone (and do tbh)

27. Least shippable character?

Sean Roman. I ship him with his hand. Barely.

[monscastle]

"you're still eating out of y/n's hands you know."

he choked, the only thought in his mind being 'no wonder this tastes familiar.'

pairing ; lee felix x gn! reader

for ; @writearctic 's chronicles!!

genre ; angst & fluff

warnings ; mild cursing, smoking

words ; 1.6k

author's note ; not today! just enjoy and feel free to give feedback!! sorry for any mistakes!! 

"hey, let's go eat." chan smiled while pressing up against the other australian.

felix hummed, not really listening as he gripped the remote in his hands and flickered the buttons with his thumbs. "where?"

"uh, that one restaurant that's like, thirty minutes away from here-"

felix glanced a glare at chan before turning back to the screen of the tv. "any reason?"

"they have a special." chan then proceeded to put he flyer in front of felix's line of sight, making the younger grunt.

felix paused his game, sighing and glaring at his friend. "alright, fine. but you're paying." 

chan grinned, "fine by me. get dressed and look decent, don't pull a jisung." 

"...i'm right here." 

______

"hello! table for three?" the host asked as soon as they walked inside. 

chan nodded, following the host with his two friends. as soon as they sat down they were handed menu's. 

"would you like to order drinks right now or when you order your food?" 

felix scanned the options, not seeing the special that chan had mentioned. he was gonna question the older until said man asked the host about it. 

"uh, i saw that y'all have a special on a flyer…" 

"oh! yes we do! we got the word out this morning, that's why it's still not on the menu. the special lasts until next friday. would you like to order that?"

"do you guys want it?" chan turned to them. 

"what's the special?" jisung rose a brow. 

the host smiled, "fettuccine alfredo pasta." 

felix hummed, thinking about it. "yeah i'd like that."

"me too." 

chan nodded, turning to the host who took out a notepad and pen. although she wasn't a waiter, she could take down orders and hand them over to the cooks. 

"great. any drinks?" she asked while tapping her notepad with the tip of the pen.

jisung nodded, "peach tea for me." 

"i'll take lemonade." 

"sprite if you have that." 

she nodded and scribbled it down before repeating their order to make sure she didn't make any mistakes. once everything was confirmed and settled,  she excused herself to order their assigned waiter to fetch their drinks. 

jisung followed her trail until she opened the kitchen doors, noticing something- more like someone, for a split second. 

"well, while we wait, let's catch up." chan sighed while staring at his friends.

"on what?" jisung asked while turning to him. 

the older thought for a second before shrugging, "i don't know, what have you guys been up to lately?"

felix propped his elbow on the table,  resting his chin on his palm. "nothing, i'm enjoying my break to the fullest."

"by being locked up and playing video games?" chan rose a brow, obviously disappointed. 

"at least he's doing something, i've been sleeping most of the time." 

"he only gets up when he needs to pee or eat." felix chuckled. 

chan frowned, "that explains a lot…" 

"anyway, what about you? changbin-hyung told me someone had the hots for you and vice versa." 

the older sputtered, "th-that's not true. and maybe it's just a new friend." 

jisung and felix rose a brow, sharing a glance before sighing. they had the habit of being synchronized without wanting to, which many found scary and or amusing. 

"you're bad at lying, you know that?" jisung chuckled, glancing at the kitchen doors that opened as a waiter came out with a tray with drinks. he smirked at his confirmation,  it's been a while since he's been this entertained. 

chan blushed, avoiding eye contact. "i know…" 

felix laughed, jisung was known for reading others. changbin was known for it too, and it was always funny when someone got exposed or confronted. 

the waiter walked up to them, placing down their drinks. "your food is ready and i'll bring it right now, i'm sorry the sudden delay in your drinks, we had a minor...issue." 

"no it's fine! thank you!" chan smiled as he took his drink and sipped from it. 

jisung stared at the kitchen doors, once they were opened he tried to find the familiar face, and he smirked to himself when he saw it. he wasn't going to say anything yet, he liked waiting it out. 

"so, who is it?" felix jabbed at chan, wanting answers.

"i- you don't know him, he's not in your major." chan nibbled at the straw. 

"and? i still wanna know." 

"it's probably someone older than him, maybe by a year? let me guess, he's also studying music production? and you met him in the cafeteria." jisung smiled when chan choked. 

felix stared at his roomate in awe, "holy fuck." 

chan gasped, staring at jisung with wide eyes. "you scare me. you're hanging out with minho aren't you?" 

"sure." 

"what do you mean sure-" 

felix grinned, "so he's right?" 

"...yeah… i'm amazed you even guessed the gender…" chan pouted, gnawing at the straw again. 

"thank you, i try." jisung sipped from his drink as the waiter returned with their food. once the waiter left he spoke again, "what's his name?" 

"why are you asking?" 

"cus it's about time you had a love life." felix rolled his eyes,  "you barely get sleep, and now you have the hots for someone? you need to go out and live a little. " 

chan scoffed, the tips of his ears still red. "yeah, look who's talking. you're probably staying inside the dorms and not going out cus you're still upset about the y/n situation." 

jisung gaped, amazed chan could strike like that. "not wrong-" 

felix growled, "y/n has nothing to do with how i'm spending my break. we broke up, that's it. nothing more nothing less to it. no hard feelings." he frowned and stuffed his mouth with some pasta, the taste making him pause and ponder.

jisung stared at the young australian, "you're still eating out of y/n's hands you know." 

and he choked, the only thought in his mind being  'no wonder this tastes familiar.' 

chan gave felix's back a few pats, " jisung stop joking around." 

said male frowned, "i'm not. y/n's in the kitchen, pretty sure y/n is the one who cooked the food." 

felix heaved, "it...does taste familiar…

"and to think you were over y/n.." 

"i am!" 

"are not, but we'll talk about this later. chan, you never told me the guys name-" 

"yah! i'm not telling." 

________ 

"you're not going back with us?" jisung asked as they exited the restaurant.  

the fact y/n was one of the chefs was forgotten once they went back to chan's possible love life topic. felix didn't really think anything of it until they got up to leave. 

"no i wanna check out that store. i'll go back on the bus." felix waved them off. 

chan frowned, "sure, ok… call if you need anything." 

"will do." 

jisung rolled his eyes, following chan to the older's car for the ride home. felix walked inside the store that was across the restaurant they had eaten at, he looked around, heart racing. 

he saw a small penguin plushie, smiling at it's fluffiness once he grabbed it. he made sure he had money before going to the register, paying and walking out. just as he did, he glanced at the restaurant and saw you. 

you stood there, lighting up a cigarette. when you glanced at him, you froze, both of you did. 

felix gripped the bag in his hand. it's been a month since the two of you broke up, quite a small amount of time considering everything. 

the reason the two of you ended things was no mystery to eithers friend group. you had suddenly gotten distant, claiming to focus on exams, which wasn't a lie. felix grew upset with the absence of you, and whenever he tried to reach out, you sounded uninterested.  

and it wasn't that you weren't,  you were just going through things. felix took it the wrong way, and the tip of the iceberg was when he saw you all touchy with someone else at a party you had said you wouldn't attend. 

instead of facing you, he played fire with fire. 

"hi…" your voice was soft, and you stared across from you, not wanting to face him. 

"hi." felix now stood next to you, staring across the street as well. 

there was a silence, and felix then glanced at the puff of smoke you let out. he was questioning himself, maybe he should go and wait for the last bus. maybe he should have gone back home with his friends. maybe-

"i'm sorry." 

felix snapped his head towards you, staring at you like a lost puppy. you were still facing across the street, cigarette in hand. 

"i'm sorry i didn't face you like i should have. i'm sorry i didn't talk things through with you… i really have no justifications for anything i did. maybe i was just confused, we were both just trying to pass our classes..you were just trying to make our relationship work… and i...i… " 

"you gave up." felix finished your sentence, now staring at the bag in his hands. 

you finally turned to look at him, "no... i got bored of trying. i got bored of us. of you."

each word made felix stagger, and you took a second to grab his hand, holding it gently. he blushed, staring down at your hand on his. 

"but i didn't want to let go of you." 

he swallowed, "then why did you…" 

"that's…a good question." you let go of his hand, and he was quick to take it again. 

"i'm sorry too. i think...we lacked communication." 

you smiled a bit, taking the cigarette in your mouth again.  "obviously...”

felix squeezed you hand, “do you think...we could try again?”

“you don’t hate me?”

he shook his head, “we were both at fault, do you hate me?”

“no....”

“so...wanna start from zero?”

you sighed, the puff of smoke intoxicating his nostrils. you didn’t pick up on smoking until after the two of you broke up, “yeah...i’d like that.”

“me too...and...jisung said you cooked our food, that true?”

“felix, i have no idea who comes into the restaurant. i just do my job.” you laughed softly, shaking your head, “but i’m the only cook today, so yeah, i guess i did. you enjoy it?”

he nodded, “i always enjoyed your food, still do.”

you tugged at his hand, “want a ride home?”

“yeah...”

[nova-is-a-writer-now]

FOOLS pt.3

[[Zuko x Reader]]

<- previous next ->

Summary: Zuko and Y/N had liked eachother for a while even though neither of them knew it. Y/N tries to get over her crush for him, failing miserably. So just when she decides to let go and embrace her feelings, the new Fire lord finds himself feeling jealous and decides to take matters into his own hands.

A/N: I’m still impressed by how many people have liked this series and I’m so grateful to everyone who reads, it’s getting a little angsty in here so be prepared. (Edit: I wrote that before actually finishing this part, scratch that cause things got REALLY FUCKING ANGSTY. Also this part is a little shorter than the others but believe me, it’s as much as your little hearts will be able to take.) As always if there’s any mistake or anything let me know.

Side note I’ll wait for a request to start writing pt. 4

Warnings: Angst but it’ll end well i promise

-IF YOU HAVE ANY REQUEST DONT HESITATE TO ASK-

You walked up to your friends once again, noticing someone was missing. “Hey... where’s Zuko?” You asked everybody as you saw the packaged dress in Katara’s hand.

“He said he had business to attend at the palace, acted really weird and stormed out the marked.” She replied looking at you with concerned look in her eyes.

“That’s...weird. Maybe he got bad news, firelord stuff.” You said more to yourself than to the others.

Sokka interviened, cutting your thoughts short. “He did say we could stay and eat around here, so let’s find a place, I’m starving.”

———————————

After lunch, you and your friends walked around the market a while longer. You saw the same thing you had seen the day before from the carriage, people were happy. This was a major concern for all of you once the war had come to an end, how would the people of the Fire nation take the new way of things?but Zuko definitely did a great job with it all.

Sokka ended up buying a bunch of junk against Suki’s advice, while you and Katara bought some pieces of jewelry to go with your dresses, Toph bought a set of nunchucks which worried all of you a little bit, and Aang bout a toy for Momo.

Soon enough you were back at the palace, Zuko still no where to be seen. You tried not to pay much attention to it, yet worry still lingered in the back of your mind. It was almost dusk when you proposed the idea of setting up a campfire outside for old time’s sake. It felt like forever since all of you had sat down around the burning flames to talk or eat or simply lay down and look at the stars. So after a while, when everyone went to their chambers to leave the things they’d bought and change to a more appropriate attire for the weather, the group was back outside setting up the fire.

You laughed at sokka who tried to light it up, struggling thanks to the fact that the only wood you had found was very old and affected by the humidity of the Fire nation’s weather. Ever since Aang learned how to firebend and Zuko joined the gaang, he hadn’t had to light up a fire from scratch.

“Hey, Sokka. It’s ok, we get it, it’s been so long since we’ve done this, you’ve kinda lost your touch.” You teased, knowing he was mostly trying to impress Suki with his abilities. Toph who was sitting next to you suppressed a laugh.

“I haven’t lost my touch, Y/N!!” He replied not taking his eyes away from the wood in front of him. “Actually it’s not a ‘touch’, it’s ability and knowledge, ok?”

Your only response was to laugh looking over at Katara. She looked at him worried and said “Are you sure you don’t want me to water bend the humidity out of the wood, Sokka?”

“No, Katara! No bending, just ability and knowledge”

“I could get the flame started for you” interviened Aang.

“Is no one listening to me? Ability and knowledge!!”

All of you let Sokka stay entertained trying to light up the camp fire for a few minutes more, after that you collectively and non-verbally decided you didn’t want to be there all night waiting, so you signaled Suki to distract him while Katara and Aang worked their quick magic. When he turned back around he saw the sparks consuming the wood slowly at first and then turning into a bigger flame. He smiled satisfied with himself and turned to look at all of you. “See? Ability and knowledge.”

“Of course it is , babe.” Suki hugged him from behind while the rest of you held a laugh. 

The laughs and giggles didn’t take long to begin. It had always been so easy to get along with eachother, like you’d been friends for way longer that you really had. Before all of this, you never had any real friends at the Northern water tribe, the boys didn’t like you because you were a girl, and the girls didn’t like you because you liked fighting and bending. But when you met the gaang, it was like you could finally be yourself and not be judged, they were more of a family to you than anyone else had ever been.

You’d been outside for a while when you heard steps getting closer behind you, the night sky already spread above you. You were about to turn around, big smile on your face assuming it was Zuko, when you realized the look on all of your friends’ faces. The smile faded as you turned your head around. In fact, it was Zuko who was approaching the campfire, but he wasn’t alone. Holding onto his arm was Mai, in a jaw-dropping dress, looking as beautifuly dark as ever. You were sure the sound of your heart breaking must’ve been heard through out the entirety of the Fire nation.

Mai? You asked yourself internally making an outworldly effort to take your eyes away from them. Everyone but you greeted them equally as shocked, then he proceeded to take a sit in a log placed right in front of you, pulling Mai into his lap. There were a few seconds of awkward silence before Sokka started speaking again. You could hear his voice, but you weren’t paying attention to his words. Your eyes were glued to the floor, too scared to even dare to look up, your face lacked any color and a now familiar knot in your throat and tightness in your chest were forming again.

You reminisced to the previous months. After Mai and Ty Lee had been released from Boiling Rock, Zuko told you he’d talked to her. They’d left things in good terms, she understood why he did what he did, and he realized how he’d treated her wasn’t the best. But you were sure that didn’t mean they were back together, I mean, that happened almost a year ago, and this was the first time you’d seen Mai since the coronation.

Has he been seeing her in secret all this time? Why keep it from me? Did he know I liked him all along and was simply trying not to hurt my feelings? But why now? And why like this?

All these thoughts ran through your head while you tried your best to keep the tears that were threatening to roll down your cheeks inside. Suki’s touch dragged you out of your head. “Y/N?” She called in a soft and low voice.

“Yeah, sorry.” You replied looking up at her.

“Wanna go get some snacks from the kitchen?”

“Sure, let’s go” You took her hand and walked with her away form the open and into the palace.

Once you were sure you were out of the group’s sight, you let out a deep breath you didn’t know you were holding up until then.

“Oh, Y/N. Are you ok?” She pressed your hand reassuringly

You forced yourself smiled at her. “Yeah, everything is fine. I’m ok.” You lied.

“Zuko is an asshole for doing this. If you want me to punch him in the face I can do that, I’m still training all the time, I’m sure I could kick his ass no sweat.” She tried to lighten the mood while leading you to the kitchen.

“No Suki, thanks. It’s ok. It’s not like we’re a thing or anything, he can go out, be with and do what he wants with whoever he wants. I’m no one to tell him otherwise” you spat, trying to convince yourself as much as Suki.

You finally arrived to the kitchen. Chef Karou took one look at you before noticing something was wrong. “Child, what happened? You’re white as a ghost.”

“It’s nothing Chef, I just got a little dizzy out of the sudden, but I’m ok.”

“Well you’re in luck, I have your favorite dessert freshly made. That’ll make you feel better.”

You and Suki carried each a basket of treats and small snacks Chef Karou had sent for you and your friends. You had to brace yourself before walking back outside, only to realize Zuko and Mai weren’t there anymore, instead a head of white hair filled the space where they’d been sitting before.

“Iroh!” You called handing your basket to Suki and walking up to him.

“Hello, my dearest.” He replied, opening his arms to give you a hug. He’d always been one to give great hugs. Since you met him, the two of you had connected through Zuko. He cared for him deeply for a very long time, and even though you had just met him then, you cared about him too. He’d shared his wise words with you, advising you about your worry regarding the war, and you listened to his stories in return. He was warm and caring and he had a very special place in your heart. Hugging him helped release the tightness in your chest that had been building up for a good while, and that came with a few tears as well. “Miss Y/N, there’s no need for tears, this is a joyful reunion.”

“I’m just...very glad you’re here.” You tried to explain wiping the wetness from your cheeks.

“I’m very happy to be back, and to see this nation be rebuilt and led honorably. Talking about leaders... have you seen my nephew around? I haven’t gotten the chance to greet him yet.” He asked looking around for him.

“I um... I guess he’s back at his office or in his chambers.” You hoped he couldn’t tell the way you were trying not to let Zuko mess with your head.

“Do you mind calling him for me, dear? I’m a little tired from the trip.”

You wanted to say no, specially since you knew Zuko had left with Mai, but saying no to Iroh had always been a hard task for you. “I... yes, don’t worry, I’ll let him know you’re here.”

And with those words you walked off to find him. His office was your first stop, you hoped he was there, sitting on his desk and going through paperwork as you’d seen him do many times before, because if he was that meant Mai wouldn’t be there, and you wouldn’t have to deal with seeing them together anymore. But to your despair, he wasn’t.

Gathering all the strength you had left, you made your way to his chambers. The walk there seemed painfully short, you wished you’d had more time to prepare, although after knocking on the door and proceeding to open it, no amount of time could’ve prepared you for the sight. Zuko and Mai were both sitting on the edge of his bed, he had his hand on her jaw, holding her tightly in her place, while her hand layed on his neck, holding onto the roots of his hair. They were kissing... really kissing.

The sound of the door opening made them realize someone was there and forcefully Zuko pulled apart. He looked at you for a few torturous seconds before saying. “Y/N, what can we help you with?”

We, it was such a dumb thing to notice but you did. Zuko said we, as in him and Mai, as in the girl who’s throat he had his tongue down mere seconds ago.

“Your uncle is here, he wants to see you.” You replied, your voice slightly shaky making you pray he didn’t notice.

“I’ll be right there... anything else?” His tone was one you hadn’t heard before, it was harsh, merciless, out of everything that had happened that evening that small detail was what hurt you the most.

“No, good night.” With those words you turned back around closing the door behind you. You couldn’t hold back the tears anymore, your heart ached in a way you’d never felt before. You cursed yourself in silence for being so dumb, so gullible to even think Zuko would think of you as anything more than a friend, a colleague. You cursed yourself because you knew this was how things were going to end from the very beginning.

Now he was kissing another girl and you were alone in your room, sitting in the dark, thinking about how you were going to pick all the pieces of your heart and put them back together.

A/N: sorry don’t hate me <3

Tag list: @harmlessoffering @zukoshonourr @marvel-ing-at-it-all @booksandwonderlands @bison-whistle @darthsokaaa @royahllty @godoftheabyss @ilovespideyyy @literally-anythin @daddystevee @annie-are-u-ok @whalerus @galacticamidala @mangoberry43 @eridanuswave @katherinethedork @littleninjablake @taeeemin

[mrsalwayswrite]

Say You’ll Stay - Chapter 7

Fury/Band of Brothers Crossover Fic

We finally meet up with Easy Company!

Tag List: @happyveday​ @alwaysindecemberfeels​ @god-of-dramatic-death-scenes​ @saritanotserena​

Series Masterlist // Next Chapter

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The morning arrived with a slight fog, bringing a sense of otherworldliness with it. As if ghosts stood along the tree line just watching and waiting in complete silence. Everyone moved with shifty feet and wary eyes, voices staying low. The starting of engines only exasperated the stillness around them. It had been decided, with so many men killed and wounded in the company, the whole group would travel to Haguenau. From there the wounded could be evacuated to a hospital and hopefully replacements sent for those lost. 

 Anna wandered around the tanks, checking in with the other medics and just trying to stay warm. Wrapping her arms around herself, she tried to keep the wintery cold at bay. A coat taken off a soldier, who no longer needed it, now covered her filthy nurse’s uniform. She tried not to think about wearing a dead man's coat, rather imaging it was a spare. Her legs were still exposed to the elements from the knees down to her short uniform boots, making it impossible to fully warm up as she walked around. 

"Mount up! Let's go!" The call echoed around from several different mouths, stilling the nervous restlessness hanging over the company. 

 The wounded were placed on the tanks to ride since they did not have a truck to transport them anymore. Besides the officers and those in the armored division, all the foot soldiers were forced to continue walking. Not a perfect solution but it was all they afford to do right now. Hopefully they could escape another surprise attack. 

 Ignoring those around her, she made her way towards Fury. Both to keep an eye on the wounded laying or sitting on the tank but to also stick close to the tank's crew. She had woken up that morning, still huddled against Boyd's side, wrapped in Don's leather jacket and the spare blanket from Gordo. They shared what breakfast they could with her before she had to head off and start rounds. Medic Arthur Christianson had taken over lead medic from Joe Hunter. A blow they all felt but this was war and you just learned to keep moving. The two other medics had been courteous enough to her from the beginning so it was not too much of a hardship to work with them. 

 Each medic had chosen a tank to walk next to and keep an eye on its wounded. She had immediately claimed Fury. 

 "Anna!" 

 Looking up, she noticed Boyd staring down at her from his spot on the tank. 

 "What you doin' down there?"

 She glanced around then stared back at him. "Walking." She stated with a casual shrug, not understanding what he was getting at. 

 Grady chuckled from his spot next to Boyd. Smoke curled around his mouth as he exhaled, the cigarette still between his teeth. 

 Boyd rolled his eyes with a deadpan expression. "I see that. Thank you. Why ain't you riding?"

 "Only wounded are riding. I'm fine, Boyd. I don't mind walking." She tried to assure him, a small smile on her face. Hopefully that masked how cold she actually was and the agitated nerves humming throughout her body. She walked a little further towards the front of the tank. Fury only carried five wounded, spread out along its sides. Stopping at a young soldier with a bandage around his head, she touched his leg to gain his attention. "How are you feeling?"

 The brunet opened his eyes, looking down at her from where he reclined on the tank. A shy smile crossed his lips. "My head ain't spinnin' like it was."

 "That's good. Let me know if that changes." Patting his leg, she smiled back at him. The young soldier was one she was particularly concerned about. During the initial explosion, he had been thrown back and landed hard on his head, getting knocked unconscious during the process. Eventually he woke back up but with a bloody head wound. 

 Tucking a few strands of wayward hair behind her ear, she adjusted Joe’s- no, her medic’s satchel across her body. Her heart clenched slightly at the reminder. Her own personal bag had been in the supply truck, now a pile of ash. Her few extra clothing items, her beloved book from home, the few letters she had from her family and friends along with what little money she had been holding onto, all gone. All destroyed in the fire that raged throughout the night as it consumed the supply truck. It hurt more than she thought it would. It was just stuff, but it had helped ground her, remind her of home. Without it, her soul felt slightly adrift. Even as she tried to convince herself it was just stuff, that it was replaceable, that twenty-two men died while she still drew breathe…. she still missed her belongings. 

 "Hey, dollface. Nice legs you got there."

 She pretended to not hear the comment from the lanky soldier sitting on the tank, bandage around his calf. She remembered him. A bullet ricochet hit his calf but he screamed like his guts were being ripped out, then he threatened one of the other medics until he received morphine. 

 "Ah, c'mon, smile. I just gave you a compliment." He called after her, a sleazy smirk on his face. 

 "Hey, shut up." Boyd demanded, having turned to glare at the offending soldier. 

 The arrogant soldier looked over his shoulder at Boyd as if surprised to be called out. "What? Like you can't see them." He snickered, continuing to leer at the nurse. 

 Anna closed her eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. Unfortunately, she was used to men like that by now. Even if she hated dealing with them. She had a job to do though. War did not care if the men it wounded were good or bad, kind-hearted or arrogant, gentle or dangerous- it took them all. Her job was to save as many as she could from War's grasp. To allow as many men as she could to return to their families one day. 

 She turned slightly to meet the eyes of the lanky soldier. "Is there something you need, soldier?"

 "Aren't you going to check on me, darling?" He winked at her. 

 In a sudden flurry of movement, Grady roughly shoved the soldier off the tank without preamble. The soldier screamed as he hit the ground, landing on his hurt leg. The sound echoed in the air, bouncing off anything nearby as if to gain momentum in volume. Everyone nearby jumped at the sound, eyes locked on the soldier swearing and rolling on the ground. Anna stared in horror and confusion, a hand over her rapidly beating heart, unsure if she should intervene or stay to the side. Her answer came in the next moment as Grady hopped off the tank to stand between the soldier and Anna. 

 The soldier screamed, grabbing at his leg as he rocked on the ground. "What the fuck was that for?! Christ, I'm wounded, you asshole!" 

 "Yeah, shut the hell up." Grady said, just staring down at the soldier. He turned to look at Anna but never turned his back completely on the soldier. "You good?"

 She nodded mutely, beyond surprised and made quite speechless by Grady's actions. 

 "Coon-Ass! What's going on here?" Don stormed towards them, cigarette hanging from his lips and fire in his eyes. 

 "Nothin', Don. He started talking shit 'bout Anna. I shut him up." Grady shrugged, staring at his commander. A silent understanding seemed to pass between the two. Don gave a curt nod and only after that did he even acknowledge the man on the ground. 

 "You his Sergeant?!" The soldier was yelling, teeth bared like a rabid dog. "He pushed me off the goddamn tank! He can't do that!" 

 "Yeah? Well, sounds like you fucking deserved it." Don pulled the cigarette from his lips, blowing the smoke out. His eyes quickly shifted to Anna to scan her quickly before dropping back down to the soldier. 

 "Cause I complimented the fucking nurse? You know what, fuck you! And fuck the bitch!" 

 Don whipped out his pistol and pointed it at the downed soldier. Every sound ceased. The air froze. No one moved. Tension radiated from the scene. It felt with one wrong move, one wrong sound, Don would shoot. Even the wounded man stared in horror and rage at the pistol aimed at him. Everyone waited to see what Don would do. Anna covered her mouth with her hand, terrified that if she even peeped, Don would shoot the man on accident. When Don spoke next, Anna had never heard him sound so cold, it physically sent shivers down her spine.

 "I highly suggest you shut that big mouth of yours before I put fucking hole in your other leg." 

 If looks could kill, the soldier would have killed the tank commander twice over with the lethal glare he leveled at Don; but he wisely kept his mouth shut. The two stared at each other, almost willing the other to say something and set them both off like ticking time bombs. 

 After several tense moments, Don was the first to rip his gaze away and look over at Anna. Without a word, he beckoned her over with his hand. Worried and a little intimidated, she hurried over to stand between him and Grady. 

 "Anna, up you go now." The tank commander stated, nodding towards Fury, the threatening tone not quite fully leached from his voice yet. 

 "Wha… oh, no, I'm ok, Don. I promise."

 Those intense eyes bored into hers, immediately stopping any further excuses from passing her lips. "I can see you shaking like a leaf from the cold. I won't ask you again."

 "She can take my spot with Bible." Grady said to Don, looking over her head. "Keep her warmer."

 "Good. C'mon then."

 Next thing she knew, she was being manhandled by Don. He lifted her up as if she weighed nothing and set her onto the tank, where Boyd took her hand and slipped her into the gunner's spot with him. Her legs immediately felt marginally warmer as they were no longer bared to the cold elements. 

 Don climbed up to his spot, just on her left. None of the other soldiers, wounded or walking, would meet his gaze as he scanned over those nearby. As if just a shared glance would unleash his terrible ire onto them.  

 "I could have gotten up by myself." She grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest as she glanced over at him. 

 His hands stilled from placing the helmet on his head, his eyes meeting hers for a brief moment. "Whatever you say, doll." He winked quickly at her then looked forward, tapping a hand on his comms to speak. "Alright, let's move out."

 After that the tank jerked forward, Boyd had reached over to help keep her upright. Once settled, she tucked her face into her coat; not because of the cold, but in hopes no one would notice the blush on her cheeks. Butterflies danced in her stomach and it took her mentally berating herself to keep the stupid, giddy smile off her face. A simple wink should not have this much of an effect on her. Her mind decided to remind her of how it felt to have his hands on her and how easily he lifted her. That thought made her face heat up even more. 

 To distract herself, she peeked over her shoulder to see Grady sitting just behind her on the tank, watching the tree line with his mouth slightly open. 

 Although she still felt somewhat tense around Grady, he no longer looked at her as if she was a piece of meat to be ogled. She had noticed it the prior night as she joined the Fury crew and fell asleep leaning against Boyd. Followed by his strange actions today, she could not help but wonder what changed… if whatever occurred between him and Don in the French town had more of an effect than she realized. Maybe he was not such a bad man after all? Giving people second chances was something her mother preached and Anna found herself trying to do. Maybe now was a perfect example?

 Those on Fury rode silently for several miles, just watching the surroundings. Her thoughts turned dark, wondering if she should write Joe Hunter's wife. Obviously his wife would receive a condolence letter from the army but maybe it would help if she received a personal letter too from someone who worked with him? Who knew him and how devoted he was to her? Then again, she did not want his wife to misread her letter somehow and think Anna and Joe had an affair and now Anna was writing a letter out of guilt? Would someone do that? Or would they keep quiet about it? Her thoughts bounced around in her mind like ping pong balls, constantly moving but never actually in a helpful way. 

 "Where you from, Anna?"

 "Mmm?" Boyd's sudden question drew her from her inner musings. She lifted her head to look at him from staring at her nails as she picked at them. It took her an embarrassingly long moment of him staring at her with his eyebrows raised for his question to sink it. Heat filled her cheeks but she hoped it was not too noticeable. "Oh, sorry. I grew up in South Carolina but my family moved to Virginia, so that's where we lived the last few years. What about you?"

 He hummed, shifting slightly. "Missouri."

 "I've never been there. Do you miss it?"

 "I reckon. I miss the people there more, ya know?"

 Don cut in, still staring a head. "What he means is, he misses his girl."

 Her eyes widened and her head moved so fast from looking at Don on her left side to staring at Boyd on her right, she almost gave herself whiplash. "You have a sweetheart?"

 "Yeah." He shrugged casually as if it was not a big deal but the small smile on his lips and the light in his eyes betrayed him. 

 "And you haven't told me this?! You were getting on my case about seeing if I had one and this whole time you did!" She smack his chest lightly, making him flinch while Don and Grady laughed. "What's her name?"

 "Sarah Grace." His eyes softened even just saying her name. "Prettiest woman on God's good earth, I swear."

 She smiled at the fondness in his tone. 

 "We was gonna marry but then the war broke out and I felt called to join up. So she's waitin’ for me. When we get back, I'll start seminary and we'll get married."

 "If she's still waiting and not married someone else."

 Boyd narrowed his eyes at the mechanic behind Anna. "Grady, you just tryin' to get me riled up. It won't work. I know she'll wait."

 "Maybe she done run off with someone already." Grady countered, a smirk on his face. 

 "I just received a letter from her last month. You know that."

 "That was last month…"

 "I swear, Grady, if you don't-"

 "Alright, alright. Knock it off." Don said, grinning. It was obvious this was a continuous argument but was born out of teasing than any true malice. Boyd mumbled something under his breath, shoving his hands in his pockets.

 "Well I think it's sweet, Boyd. I'm happy for you." She bumped his shoulder, erasing the scowl on his face. In a split second decision, she looked behind her at Grady. Second chances, she told herself. "Where are you from?"  

 Initially, he seemed startled that she would ask him but quickly hid the surprise with his usual indifference. "California."

 She turned to Don next. "And you?"

 "Kentucky."

 It felt like she had to physically tear her eyes away from his or else she would be trapped in them. There was an intensity in them that balanced on the edge of exhilarating and terrifying. All it took was a small breeze to push him one way or another. So far she had only seen the kind and protective side of him. Now though, after he pulled the gun on the wounded man, she had seen a brutal side. It reminded her of when Norman mentioned about when he first met Don. Now she could see it, what Don had forced Norman to do. It sent a chill down her spine. People were forced to commit terrible crimes all the time during war. Was this side of Don because of war or just something that lurked under the surface continuously? She found herself worried about the answer. 

 Boyd interrupted her thoughts, continuing the conversation. "Gordo there is from Texas. Norman is from Pennsylvania."

 "Y'all are from all over the place." 

 "Yep, all it took was Hitler startin’ a war for us to meet."

 They all chuckled but grew quiet again at the sobering thought. 

 Anna could not help but think about where she would be right now if she had not joined the Nurse Corps. She had hoped to go to college and become a teacher. It was not glamorous but the very thought of it brought a smile to her face. Much to society's chagrin, she wanted more from life than to just marry the first man that came around and start having his babies. But it did not matter now. She was not even on the same continent of her birth. 

 She pushed back the thoughts of before and focused on those around her. The smell of cigarettes from the soldiers surrounding her. The chill in the air that clung to her without reprieve. The sight of what should have been a beautiful forest but set her on edge, expecting another surprise attack. She could not focus on what she was missing out on. War happened. And she answered the call. Even if it had been to get away from her own sins and ruined reputation.  

 *****

 The next afternoon, the company and tanks rolled into Haguenau. Snow dusted everything that had not been trampled yet. The air hung heavy with fatigue and despair. Supposedly the Allies were winning the war, but with the looks on the faces around… you would not suspect that. The sound of a mortar slamming into the ground up ahead made Anna flinch. She could not help but wonder what kind of new hell she had been taken too. 

 "Let's park in the rear. Don't need those Krauts aiming for our tanks." Don said over the comms. 

 When the tanks stopped, everything ground to a halt around them, followed by Captain Evans pulling up in his jeep. "Sergeant Collier! You'll come with me. Let's find out who's running this shit show."

 "Yes, sir!"

 Anna slid off the side of the tank, careful of her cold, bare legs. Instead of riding that day with Boyd, she had instead elected to ride next to a young soldier who had been shot in the shoulder. Tears slipping down his cheeks but the soldier never made a sound. The whole ride she held his hand on his uninjured side. Occasionally, she had to check on the other wounded but she always returned back to the young soldier. He never cried out, just whispered a near silent 'thank you' and held her hand tightly. 

 She could hear the men being told to stay put until further orders were given. Most were used to the routine by now. Stand around until directed where to go next. It was something she was adjusting too. Ignoring those yelling commands around her, she fixed her mangled uniform and coat as much as possible and looked up at her patient/companion. 

 "I'll be right back." She tapped the young soldier's leg before walking away in search of Medic Christianson. 

 She found him talking to one of the other medics, standing near a different tank. "Arthur, what do we do now?" She asked, rubbing her hands together to try and warm them up. Spring and its accompanying warmth could not come soon enough. 

 "We need to find the aid station they have here. Hopefully get the men moved there and transported to a hospital." He said, lighting a cigarette. After a drag, he pinched the bridge of his nose. "Right, I'll go. Keep an eye on those around here."

 "I'll come with you." She said probably far too brightly if the looks given to her said anything.  

 His green eyes narrowed at her a moment before he shrugged. "Fine. Let's go."

 She started to follow him, arms wrapped around herself in the large army-issued coat. For a second she wondered if she should tell Boyd where she was going then she dismissed it. He was not her keeper. She was here to do her job. 

 They wandered into the corpse-like city of Haguenau. It looked desolate. A mere illusion of what it had once been before war corrupted its beauty. Bombed buildings, craters in the streets, the staining of blood scattered along the ground and snow. Anna had never seen a place like this before. 

 After receiving directions from a passing Sergeant, they found the building housing the aid station. It was a two-story house that looked semi-stable, but far better than others surrounding it. Which was not a high standard. Anna and Arthur quickly ascended the steps and walked inside, not just to get out of the cold but to avoid the sporadic mortars. 

 "Something you need?" A voice asked them as soon as Arthur closed the door behind them. 

 The two looked over to see a man watching them from a side room. He had short black hair, thin beard, open face and medic badge on his arm. His head was tilted to the side, the cap on his head sliding slightly with the movement.

 "We just arrived with our company and we've got wounded." Arthur said, taking charge and moving another step into the building.  

 "Uh huh." The man eyed them then turned back and called out toward another room. "Hey, Roe!" He looked back at the two by the door, it was obvious the calculations crossing his mind as he prepared his question. "How many wounded?"

 "Eighteen."

 "Shit. What happened?"

 Anna kept back, allowing Arthur to take the lead. The dark-haired medic's eyes flickered towards her occasionally as if wondering what she was doing there but chose not to ask. Rubbing her hands together, a brief smile lifted the corners of her lips. Just being indoors, the permanent chill in her bones receded just enough she did not worry her legs would turn to icicles. It had only been a few days since the company left the small French town but being continuously outdoors, day and night, was something Anna found she disliked fervently. She looked over as she heard footsteps coming around the corner. 

 Arthur was still talking to the dark-haired medic, explaining what happened. "They laid landmines in the road, then when we stopped they fired on us from the surrounding woods. Perfect fucking ambush."

 "Damn Nazis." The medic shook his head. "You hear that, Gene?"

 The one called for came around the corner. He also had dark hair, pale skin and a sharp jawline. His eyes though were dull and a hint of red lingered around his nose like he was getting over a cold. His uniform was clean but even that could not distract from how bone-deep weary he appeared. "I 'eard. We got room upstairs. Won't be an issue."

 She froze, her mind whirling. That voice. She recognized it. Not many medics she had encountered had such a distinct Cajun drawl. Her brain frantically raced trying to remember where she knew it from. 

 "Eugene?" She found herself asking, hesitation in her voice. The man's head whipped over to stare at her. "Eugene Roe?"

 "Yes, ma'am. Have we met?"

 "Yes… I mean." She tucked some loose stands of her hair behind her ear, nervous that he would not remember her. "It…. It was back in Albourne. We did some training together. I'm Anna… Anna Cooper."

 One could watch the light bulb go off in his mind and his eyes light up. "Chérie?" His voice almost held an element of awe to it, that she was here and real. 

 She nodded, feeling tears fill her eyes. There was something in the simple nickname that tugged at her heart's strings. It reminded her of a time before war. Before blood and screams. Before the memories of death were stronger than memories of home. When it would just be the two of them at the aid station in Albourne practicing bandaging one another or swapping stories of their homes when homesickness struck them. 

 He hesitated for a moment before walking towards her. Seeing him move, she practically sprinted to him. They collided in that drafty building in Haguenau and for a moment, both felt like they could feel the sunshine on their faces and a spring rain to cleanse the taint of death from their skin. She wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his chest. His own arms enclosed around her much smaller frame, surrounding her in warmth. Tears slipped down her cheeks, wetting his ODs. For once, she was not even ashamed. 

 "It's alright, chérie, it's alright."

 She laughed wetly, tipping her head up to look at him. "I can't even tell you how happy I am to see you."

 "I got that impression." 

 "Don't ruin the moment, Gene."

 He chuckled, pressing a chaste kiss to her forehead. "It's good to see ya too." He released her to step back and fully look at her. It was then he seemed to finally noticed her attire, or lack thereof. His eyes narrowed staring at her bare legs and short uniform boots before jumping back up to her face. "How did ya end up here? And what 'appened to ya uniform? Ya must be freezin'."

 "It's a long story...and we ran out of bandages, so…" she shrugged, gesturing to her clothes, self-conscious of her exposed skin. 

 Gene and the other medic shared a look before Gene looked back. "I expect to ‘ear it later, and we'll find ya some spare ODs. Spina, we got any in the new winter lot?"

 "Uh...I think so." The dark-haired medic responded, eyebrows almost touching his forehead. 

 "How many wounded y’all got?" Gene asked Anna.

 "Eighteen."

 "Bring 'em here. We'll make room. Medics?"

 Arthur answered this time, arms crossed over his chest. "Three medics and Nurse Cooper."

 "Good. Know how long y’all stayin'?"

 "No." She peeked over at Arthur, who confirmed her answer with a short nod. "We only just arrived."

 Gene looked over at Arthur. "Careful bringin' 'em here. We'll get space set and some coffee for ya." He peered down at Anna, eyes softening. "Let's get ya some warmer clothes, chérie."

 "I swear you're an angel… a Cajun angel."

 He chuckled, shaking his head. "Whatever ya say." Putting an arm around her shoulders, he guided her towards a different room. 

 And for a moment, she was reminded that one could find joy even in the midst of war. 

 *****

 The tank commander stood in the back of the crumbling, dank room observing the scene before him. He had followed Captain Evans and his two lieutenants to the HQ for the battalion holding Haguenau. Personally, he would rather be back with his men instead of here listening to formal introductions. This battalion did specifically ask for him and his platoon, so he steeled himself to get through this.  

 "I'm Captain Evans of the 103rd Infantry Division. This is Lieutenant Diggs and Lieutenant Cox. Behind them is Staff Sergeant Collier of the Armored Division." The Captain, who was clearly the oldest in the room by at least a decade or two, stood in the middle of what most likely used to be a nice living room, if the damaged chandelier hanging above him said anything. Now the place looked somewhere between trashed and abandoned. His two lieutenants stood just behind him as the introductions took place. "I'll get to the damn point, eh? We were blitz attacked on our way here, lost twenty-two men and another eighteen wounded. Fucking Krauts. I'm requesting permission to regroup and have our wounded taken care of before we move out."

 The red-head with the Captain's bars on his jacket nodded quickly, granting permission before Captain Evans even finished asking. "Of course. We don't have a lot to spare but we will what we can." He reached his hand out to shake hands with the grizzled captain. "I'm Captain Winters of the 506th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 101st Airbourne."

 "Paratroopers, eh?" The older man eyed the other captain after shaking hands.  "Heard you are some mean bastards. Nice to see the reputation isn't wrong for once."

 "Just doing our jobs."

 "Right. We'll get outta here, eh? Thank you again, Captain."

 "Sure." Captain Winters stated kindly but still with a hint of a guarded tone. "You need anything, ask for myself or Lieutenant Speirs of Easy Company."

 With a final nod, Captain Evans and his two lieutenants walked out. A strange silence fell over those in the room after the door slammed shut behind the Infantrymen. Don suddenly felt like he was back in the elementary school yard and was waiting to get picked for a team. Thankfully the silence did not last long. 

 "Armored Division? Are you our supposed tanks?" A dark-haired man asked, sitting propped up in a corner, flask openly in hand. This was his first time speaking, instead having just watched the prior introductions with a cocky grin.

 Don eyed him, noting the Captain bars on his uniform. "Yes, sir. 2nd Armored Division or what's left of it."

 Captain Winters stepped forward to shake Don's hand. "Thank you for coming so quickly."

 "Yeah, could have used you two months ago. Hell, even a month ago could have saved lives." The other Captain muttered then took a sip from his flask. Don tensed but then noticed the unnamed Captain's aggression seemed more directed at whatever happened two months ago versus Don himself. 

 The red-head looked over his shoulder. "Nix…"

 "Yeah, yeah, I know."

 Winters looked back at Don. "How many tanks do you have?"

 "Four, sir."

 "Good...good. There is talk of some smaller towns nearby we will need you for, to provide assistance with liberating and securing. Until we know for sure, your men find somewhere to stay. As of now, you are under my direct command, understand?"

 "Yes, sir."

 "That'll be all, Sergeant Collier."

 Don gave a quick salute and headed back out into the bombed out town. As he walked back towards the tanks, he thought about the man whose command he was now under. Captain Winters. There was a calculating intelligence in his eyes, not in a malicious way, but more as a chess master. When he asked Don about the number of tanks, it was apparent his mind immediately took the information and began processing how best to utilize them. Don also noticed how when a mortar landed particularly close to the building, making the few pictures left on the walls shake, neither the red-headed Captain nor the dark-haired one flinched. At all. The tank commander was unsure fully what to make of the other Captain- this Nix- but he approved so far of what he has seen in Captain Winters. He was a man obviously in control with his authority but was not so far up in the clouds he forgot about his foot soldiers. A rare trait amongst Regiment in Don's opinion. 

 By the time Don arrived back, it seemed most of the infantrymen had dispersed into the city leaving the tanks and their crews waiting for him. He hoped they could find a decent building to claim without resorting to violence. At this point, he was not above punching a few Privates to make sure his crew got a good roof over their heads. 

 "What's the orders?" Binkowski asked, eyeing the city warily. 

 Don sighed, rubbing a hand over his face before answering. "Under a Captain Winters now. Said to stay put until orders are confirmed but sounds like we'll help secure some towns nearby."

 "Heard they're paratroopers." Davis said. He leaned against his tank, lighting up a cigarette. 

 "Yep." The sound of a mortar went off nearby. Don watched Norman startle out of the corner of his eye then rub his nose on his sleeve. He made a mental note to check on the kid once they got settled.

 "Paratroopers?" One of Davis' crew muttered, standing just off to the side. 

 "The idiots that volunteered to jump out of planes." Binkowski answered with a snort and shake of his blond head. 

 "On purpose?" The crew member's eyes widened. Don tried to remember the man's name. Kohl… Colbert… Coulson… something like that. 

 Gordo said, sitting on top of Fury. "Heard they are some real sonsofbitches."

 Don smirked. "Guess we'll find out. Let's find somewhere to claim before all the houses are filled up."

 The men began to move, ready to find somewhere to bunk down. Don surveyed around once more, wondering what awaited them in this hell hole.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Alright, what did y’all think of Easy’s introductions? Lemme know what you think!

[writefightandflightclub]

Cave me in (Poe x GN reader one shot)

Author’s note: this is a slightly less developed one-shot than I’d usually post, but I’m aiming to throw a few things at you this week while everyone is in quarantine and waiting on the series stuff. Sound ok, readers?

Summary: stranded in a cave with Poe and awaiting rescue, you finally confront that rumour which has been flying around base. Spoiler alert, things get a little steamy. 

Warnings: this is trope central. Warnings for nudity, BLOW JOB, language.

(GIF by @hupperts​)

The mission went south. Long story short, you made it out of the danger zone, but Poe and you had managed to get yourselves stranded. Then, it rained. Then it rained some more. You walked for miles over the barren landscape, clothes sodden, and eventually managed to find a cave to shelter in. 

“Poe, can you get started on setting a fire, somewhere at the mouth?”

“I’ll start a fire in your mouth.” he says, as if it’s an innuendo.

You shake your head in confusion. He’s inexplicable, that man. “Poe what does that even mean? How do you ever pull?”

“Must be the schlong.” you can just about make him out, winking at you in the waning light. You sincerely hope he catches you rolling your eyes in return.

Meanwhile, as he obediently stokes the fire, you set about fiddling with the comms equipment, hoping that it will be dry enough here to maintain a signal. Even though your hands feel like ice blocks, your fingers less than dexterous, you finally manage to connect everything up and patch a message through to the Resistance. You are relieved to hear that a fleet is nearby and someone should be able to peel off to pick you up.

“Th- they’ll be a c- couple of h-hours.” you say through chattering teeth.

“That’s good news!” Poe says, getting a pretty impressive fire roaring.

“Y-yeah.” you try to agree, but your shivers have become much more violent since you stopped moving, and you feel like your body is seizing up. You’re so cold.

Poe comes over to you, feels your hands and face. “Fuck, you’re like ice. You need to get out of these wet clothes.”

“N-no way!” you argue.

“I won’t look, I promise. Just to your underwear. I’ll strip too.”  You fold your arms stubbornly. “It’s a medical necessity, Y/N. Do I have to order you to do this?”

“S-since when does ordering me to d-do anything ever h-help?”

“Rarely. Y/N, come on.” he says firmly and you reluctantly begin to peel off your layers.

“Stop b-begging me to undress and s-strip then f-flyboy.”

You both strip off, silently, down to your underwear, spreading the garments out on rocks close to the fire to dry off.

You avert your eyes from him, melodramatically, looking up at the ceiling and out into the darkness and anywhere else.

“Feel free to look at me if you like,” Poe encourages, such an incessant flirt. “You might even enjoy it. Might warm you up some.”

You roll your eyes, half-heartedly this time, and gravitate towards the flames, the heat gradually thawing your body as you stretch out in front of it like a scarecrow. And maybe you do sneak a sly, less than subtle look at him in those tight boxers, since he gave you permission.Your eyes skimming over that juicy ass. Oof, you didn’t know he had tattoos. And, although you’d tried to imagine it plenty, you didn’t know he would look so fine under his clothes.

He’s really not looking at you though. Not even a little. Not even as you sit down by the fire together. It’s like he doesn’t even have to try; as if you’re not tempting to him at all.

Maybe he’s really not that into you. Maybe he is just an indiscriminate flirt, like you’ve been telling yourself. His attentions nothing personal, nothing of substance.

Soon though, you forget you’re sat in your underwear at all; in your relief to be warm, safe, you fall into the easy camaraderie you have with him, exchanging friendly chatter about nothing in particular. Shortly, you are both in hysterics as you swap some of the best rumours currently doing the rounds back at base.

You throw your head back in laughter at the latest revelation, tears forming at the corners of your creased eyes. “You spread that one about yourself?!” you howl, clutching your belly as you convulse in amusement. You can barely get your words out in between sniggers. He chuckles along with you. “Why would you want people to think you had an alien dick?”

“Sometimes I just need an added challenge, or it’s far too easy for me to pull.”

That sets you off again, as if the idea of him pulling with any frequency is preposterous. Sure, he’s handsome, but he’s such a goof too. He’s not half as smooth as he thinks he is.

“Poe, BB-8 talks. Finn talks. I know you haven’t had anyone back to your room in months.”

He sucks air through his teeth. “Maybe I should rethink that alien dick thing.” He smiles broadly at you, maybe a little keen to change the subject, and bats you on the thigh with the back of his open hand. “Come on, you go. Heard any good ones lately?”

You bridge your fingers together and scrunch up your face, deep in thought. “Well, I did hear something.”

“Go on.”

“I heard a rumour that you like me.”

He physically shrinks back from you, leaning back on his hands, dipping his head towards his bare shoulder. You can’t be sure, in the firelight, but you swear he blushes. Then he smiles at you, his eyes dipping briefly over your torso. He shifts in his seat again and rubs his hand over the stubble at his jaw.

Neither of you seem to find this particular rumour quite so funny.

You look him steadily in the eyes, testing, looking for answers. “But that can’t be true, because you’re doing a really good job of not looking at me.”If he wanted you, if he wanted you at all, wouldn’t this be his moment. Half-naked and jubilant in the soft glow of this cave? You had to know.

“I promised you I wouldn’t look.” he says in a small voice, wringing his hands together. “Hey, our clothes are probably dry now.” he annonces, standing and moving away from you, busying himself. 

“Poe?” you call, realisation beginning to wash over you.

“Come on, Y/N. Don’t do this to me.” he pleads. “Just drop it.” All his bluster gone.

Hold up, is that why? Is that why he hadn’t had anyone else back to his room? Is that why he asked Leia to team up with you on missions? He likes you?

Oh. Oh.

“Poe.” you say with clarity, “What if I want you to look at me?”

“What?” he dismisses, still flustered, embarrased.

“What if I want you to look at me.” you repeat, the desire in your voice potent.

He gulps, seeing that you’re serious, seeing the intention, the truth in your body. 

“If I want to? Are you kidding me?” he asks as if you’re ridiculous. He gulps heavily, his eyes skimming over your body in the soft firelight, snagging on your chest, your stomach, your hips, your thighs.

He juts his chin out at you, regaining some of his bravado. “I’m looking at you. And you’re gorgeous. So d’you wanna kiss me?” 

“Yes, you goofball.”

Maker, is this happening?

You close the distance between you in no time at all, and his hands wind in your hair, holding your face firmly in his warm, rough hands as he presses his soft lips against you. Finally. You smile as he hums into the kiss, your body beginning to languish feebly against him as he slips you the tongue. His mouth moves against you slowly but ravenously, as if he’s been starving for you, his tongue exploring the cave of your mouth, delicate and warming, just like the firelight which licks and dances across the cave you stand in.

Damn, he said he’d start a fire in your mouth and it had been nonsense, but now maybe you believe him: and then some; your whole body burns with lust.

Reluctantly, he breaks from you, both of you trembling, and his eyes rove over you seeking your reaction. His hands, now at your back have to practically hold you up.

“P- ohhhh, dayyymmmmm er ohhhhn.” you breathe, floored by that kiss. Boy, does his name lend itself well to exclamations of pleasure.

How had you waited this long to kiss him? You grab him by the neck and pull his hot lips to yours again, eager to make up for lost time. You practically growl as he breaks from you again.

“Um, this is getting me...excited and there aren’t many layers between us, is that ok?” His voice is husky, hollowed-out, like he’s parched for you.

“Yeah, that’s very ok.” you press your hands to his shoulders and walk him backwards, until you have him pressed up against the wall of the cave. “Except, I wish there was even less between us. Can we get rid of these silly little boxers?”

You look hungrily at the sizeable bulge causing his boxers to tent.

You drop to your knees willingly, sitting back on your heels, your palms flattened obediently to your thighs. You look up at him from beneath your lashes, your eyes indicating you are about to devour him.

“Holy fuck.” he looks wrecked already, his palms spread flat against the wall as if to steady himself.

“Relax, Dameron. I just want to suck you off, is that gonna be ok?”

Maker, does you talking dirty like that turn him on in new ways.

“Yes, that is very ok.”

You smile deviously and tease him for a moment, planting careful kisses on his thighs, his stomach.

“Oh, baby, you’ve got my dick so hard.” the tremor in his voice is such a turn on.

He brings a shaky hand to the back of your head and drives your face into his crotch, where you can feel his stiff length straining against you. You open your mouth and moan into him, hoping he can feel the warmth he’s missing -for now- from your hot, sweet breath filtering through the fabric. You feel his erection twitch enthusiastically against your face.

You move to free him, stretching his waistband until you are able to wind a hand around his length and unveil him. “Fuck me” he says in response to your touch, already throbbing against your hand. His cock is big and thick and pretty, the smooth head already beading with precum. You palm him and bring the tip of his cock to your lips. Of course you part them for him, flicking your wet tongue around the head.

Maker. You know he never shuts up but you hadn’t expected him to be so vocal. You take a moment to look up at him, at his hot, almost naked body laid out for you, his eyes already fluttering closed, his mouth open with wrangled moans which echo around the cave. It’s so fucking hot.

It makes you even more hungry to taste him, to work your tongue against every countour of him, smooth head, veined shaft, to have you lips wrapped around him as he bucks deep into you. Fuck. He’s completely at your mercy.

“Look at me.” you urge him. And he grunts in need, watches you as he winds his hand in your hair and you dip your head along his shaft tantalisingly slowly, running your tongue along him as you do, feeling every inch of him disappear into your mouth. You adminster a few, slow dips of your head, all the way down, until he is wet. And then you pull back, swirling your tongue around the head of him, teasing him until he is needy and practically bucking his hips into you, needing desperately to piston his cock in and out of you. When you’re satisfied you’ve teased him enough, you take him all again, moaning on him, enjoying him filling you. Enjoying Poe Dameron in your mouth, taking him deeper than you might have thought possible.

His moans are delicious, telling you he is enjoying the sight of his cock disappearing into your mouth too. More wrangled sounds, your hands gripping his strong, trembling thighs tightly. You know he’s close.

“Y/N” he groans. “I’m gonna- can I, in your mouth?”

You hum affirmatively with him still deep in you, squeezing the base of him firmly with your hand. He comes almost instantly, knees close to buckling as he spasms in pleasure and you feel his cock pump his seed out of him and into the back of your throat. You swallow it down eagerly, sucking every drop from him.

He lets out a long, satisfied exhale, and you hold his hips as he twitches with aftershocks.

Finally, you pull off of him, your mouth and his cock still connected by spit trails. Your lips plumped by his cock and glistening with wetness.

You grin widely at him. “Yum,” you praise.

He can’t speak for a while. He’s got nothing. You’ll have to remember that if you ever need to shut him up. Which is at least 5 times a day, usually.

When he stops looking like he’s seeing stars and you’re confident he’s not going to keel over -it seemed touch and go for a hot minute- you stand up and wrap your arms tenderly around his waist, your hands carressing his smooth, tan skin.

“Fuck. I didn’t think you even liked me.” he says when he can speak again, nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. “I thought you were immune to my charms.”

“I’m not fussed about you, Dameron, I just wanted to see if you really had an alien dick.

He laughs into your neck, the sound blissfully familiar but the sensation -this closeness- new.

“I hope you weren’t disappointed.”

He kisses along your collarbone.

“Nah, you have quite the schlong. But... I do want to explore another rumour I heard.”

“What’s that?”

“That you can go all night.”

As if by magic the communicator flutters to life and they let you know they’re five minutes out.

“Promise me you’ll hold that thought?” he pleads, as you reluctantly dress, planting plenty of kisses on each other’s lips in between layers.

“Do you think they’ll know what we just did?”

“Ooh, we might start a rumour.” you laugh, joyously. 

“That Y/N gives the best head in the galaxy? I sorta wanna keep that secret all to myself.”

In your bubble, you hadn’t noticed Finn and Rey round the corner to the mouth of the cave - not until it was too late.

“Ew, too much information Dameron!” Finn exclaims, recoiling.

Fuck.

Poe looks horrified for a moment and then just shrugs.

“You know what, I’m not even sorry.”

He’s just happy you finally caved.